Today, Jay dives into a feeling many of us know well: the sense that nothing in life is going the way we hoped. Whether your career feels stuck, your relationships feel off, or you’re just not where you thought you’d be by now. Jay reminds us that feeling stuck doesn't mean you've failed, but could be life giving you a moment to pause and reset. Jay explains that the way we experience reality depends on what we choose to focus on. When we're fixated on what's going wrong, we often miss the small signs that things are already starting to move forward.
Jay also challenges the idea that success is supposed to be linear or perfect. He reminds us that the people who seem ahead aren’t more talented, they just started sooner. Rather tha comparing ourselves to someone else’s timeline, Jay encourages us to focus on our own path and let go of the pressure to have it all figured out. Instead of trying to achieve something massive all at once, Jay encourages us to “shrink the vision, save the dream,” and take small, consistent steps that compound into real transformation. He reminds us that a plateau isn’t a setback, it’s a season of quiet growth that often comes right before a breakthrough.
In this episode, you'll learn:
How to Break Mental Overload with Movement
How to Take Action Before You Feel Ready
How to Stop Waiting for the Perfect Time to Start
How to Reframe Feeling Stuck
How to Build Momentum with Tiny Steps
No matter where you are in your journey, remember this: you’re not behind, you’re not broken, and you haven’t missed your chance. Feeling stuck doesn’t mean you’re failing, it means you’re in the middle of growth.
With Love and Gratitude,
Jay Shetty
Join over 750,000 people to receive my most transformative wisdom directly in your inbox every single week with my free newsletter. Subscribe here.
What We Discuss:
00:00 Intro
01:06 Does It Feel Like Nothing's Working?
02:38 What is the Frequency Illusion?
04:39 Step #1: Stop Trying to Feel Motivated
10:04 Step #2: Break the Mental Spiral
12:07 Step #3: There is No ‘Right’ Time to Start
16:14 Step #4: Consistency Outlasts Talent
24:35 Step #5: Shrink the Vision, Save the Dream
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
You want to realize where you are is a launchpad,
not a trap door. Where you're standing right now is
going to propel you forward, not pull you down. But
when we tell ourselves a story and a narrative that
where I am is the worst place ever, it forces
us to stay there. You're not stuck, You're stabilizing. That's
(00:23):
a part of growth. You're not failing. You're getting feedback
that life didn't sugarcoat the number one Health and well
Inness podcast, Jay Shetty, Jay Sheddy Shetty, Hey, everyone, welcome
back to On Purpose. I'm Jay Sheddy, your host, and
(00:44):
I am so grateful that you've tuned back in. If
you're watching on YouTube, make sure you've subscribed to this
channel so that you never miss a video. And if
you're listening to this on Spotify, Apple, iHeart, or wherever
you get your podcasts, make sure you subscribe as well.
I don't want you to miss out on the exciting
guests and themes that we have coming up later this year. Now,
(01:06):
this episode is all about what to do when you
feel like nothing's working. I think we all go through
moments in life where it feels like everything and everyone
is against us. It can even feel like the world
is against us right. Things aren't going our way. We're
(01:27):
not experiencing those moments of luck. Maybe you're always late
for the bus, the train's never on time, your car's
breaking down, the kids are having a really tough time
at school. Maybe you didn't get the promotion you were
working towards. And what you're wondering is what do I
do when I feel like nothing's working? And sometimes we
(01:50):
get so disheartened, we get so depressed that we don't
even wonder that anymore. We just assume that this is
our life, this is all it is, and this is
how it will always be. If you feel stuck right now,
this episode is for you. If you feel like you're
in a rut or you've hit rock bottom, this is
(02:12):
for you. And if you're wondering how to build momentum
and get out of where you are, this episode is
for you. I also want you to pass this on
to someone who might benefit from it, because I'm sure
you have friends and family and people reaching out all
the time and saying, hey, if I'm honest with you,
nothing's working out right now, nothing's going in the right direction.
(02:37):
Before I jump in to how do we address this.
I want to share something known as the frequency illusion.
Now we've all experienced this in our life. Think about it.
Have you ever said to yourself, I really want to
buy a red car or a certain Maycore model, and
all of a sudden, all you see on the roads
(02:58):
is that car. Every single car is that color, every
single car is that model. Now are there more of
that car on the road just at that moment in time?
Are there certainly more red cars on the streets? The
answers no. The reality is the frequency illusion is at play.
Because you're consciously thinking about something, you now see it
(03:22):
appear more than normal. We all do this, And whether
it's a red car, or whether it's slightly salmon colored,
or whether it's slightly dark maroon, you still think it's
a red car. So when you're conscious of something, you
frequently see it. Therefore, if you believe that nothing's working
(03:46):
for you, you will notice all the signs that nothing's
working for you. And if you believe that things are
moving in your favor, you will notice all the signs
that things are moving in your favor. I guarantee you
there was someone you smiled at yesterday and they smiled
(04:06):
back but I also guarantee you there's someone you looked
at the other day smiled and they didn't smile back.
What you remembered was based on what you noticed. What
you notice becomes your reality. You can either notice when
people help you open the door, take a step towards
you give you an opportunity, or you can notice when
(04:29):
they didn't open the door, when they shut it in
your face, or when there was no path forward. What
we notice becomes a reality. With that, I want to
dive into point one. Stop trying to feel motivated. This
is one of the biggest mistakes we all make. We
(04:50):
want to feel motivated, we want to feel excited, we
want to feel enthusiastic. What I've learned, very very clearly
is if you wait for motivation, you'll be waiting a
long long time. People who make moves don't wait for motivation.
People who make progress don't wait for motivation. Actually, they
(05:14):
do things when they don't feel motivated. That's the key
to success. That's the key to discipline, is doing things
when we don't feel motivated. Motivation is this myth, this
myth that you need to feel ready to take action. Instead,
we need to focus on building momentum triggering momentum. The
(05:38):
truth is action creates motivation, not the other way around.
A lot of us think that I'll feel motivated, then
i'll take action. It's the other way around. Take action
and then you'll feel motivated. Now this idea is actually
backed by science. The zygenic effect shows that starting a task,
(05:58):
even imperfectly, creates mental tension that keeps us engaged until
we finish. This psychological principle, once you understand it will
transform the way you live. It will stop you from
waiting to feel ready. Here's how it works. Your brain
remembers unfinished tasks more than finished ones. When you start something,
(06:23):
even just a little, your brain creates a mental loop
that stays open. That tension makes you want to go
back and complete it. That's why it's easier to keep
working after you've started, but so hard to begin. Motivation
kicks in after momentum, not before. So today, don't try
(06:46):
to finish the whole thing. Start badly. Start briefly. All
you have to do is set a timer for three minutes,
open the document, do one push up, write one sentence.
That's it, because your mind will force you to go
back to an unfinished task. If a task is not
(07:06):
yet begun, you won't have motivation or momentum. Once the
task is begun, your mind and your brain are somewhat
committed to finish it. The mistake we make is we say, well,
I'm gonna do all of it today. I'm going to
finish the whole thing today, and that becomes an insurmountable task.
The weight is too heavy to carry and we end
(07:29):
up dropping the ball and feeling like failures. So the
mistake we make is we live in one of two extremes.
I'm gonna do nothing or I can't do anything because
everything's against me, or I'm gonna do everything perfectly, brilliantly, completely,
and both of those mindsets set us up for failure.
Script one video, post one podcast. Just start. Once you
(07:54):
start the Zygoniic effect, does the rest. Stop looking for motive,
start small, stop looking for perfection, start messy, Stop waiting
for clarity, start moving, Stop waiting to be confident, start anyway.
(08:16):
Stop waiting for the timing to feel right. Start where
you are, because the time will never feel right. You'll
never feel ready because you weren't meant to. You were
just meant to get going. Here's what I want you
to do today. Pick one small task you've been avoiding,
(08:37):
set a five minute timer and just stop. Don't aim
to finish, aim to begin. Momentum will meet you there,
because remember, the first thing you make won't be great.
The first video might feel awkward, the first post might
get ignored, the first idea might not land. The first
(09:02):
time you put yourself out there, you'll probably cringe. You'll
overthink it, you'll question yourself, you'll wonder if it's even
been worth it. But remember this, the first thing you
do won't be the last. Keep going. You don't need motivation,
(09:22):
you need movement. Stop putting it off, Stop postponing your
dreams and your ideas and everything you want to do.
All it does is put more pressure on it. All
it does is make you watch others who've already got started.
The reason why people are ahead of you is not
because they're better, it's because they started earlier. Just let
(09:45):
that sink in for a moment. People just started earlier.
And what happens when people start early? People judge, people criticize.
When people start to do anything, everyone goes, what's that?
Don't really think it's going to be worth it don't
really think it's going to work. You break through that
by making movement step number two, break the brain loop.
(10:07):
Here's what you have to do. Do something pointlessly physical
when everything else feels stuck. Your brain is usually stuck
in over analysis and mental clutter. Moving physically changes everything.
This is back by science. Studies show that repetitive physical
actions walking, cleaning, showering activate the defunct mode network, which
(10:31):
improves problem solving and calms mental noise. That's from Harvard
Medical School in twenty fifteen. So here do this today.
Fold laundry. You gotta do it anyway. Wash the dishes.
You got to do it anyway. Walk around the block,
no phone, no podcast, just you and the motion. Your
body can reset a stuck mind. Here's how I think
(10:55):
about it. When your mind is stuck, move your body,
and when your body is stuck, move your mind. It's
the opposite. Sometimes we get so stuck in our head
and we're just trying to figure it all out in
our head. I'm sure you've had those moments of crashing out.
We just go round and round in circles in your mind, negotiating, analyzing,
(11:15):
feeling overwhelmed. Instead of all of that just move your body.
I've heard this from people first hand. Whether you're stuck
after a breakup, whether you're stuck because you didn't get promoted,
whether you're stuck because you're feeling like you don't have
energy or you feel like you don't have motivation. The
people who end up at a kickboxing class, end up
walking around the block, end up going for a run,
(11:36):
end up hanging out with their friend at the gym.
Even just that act gets you out of that rut.
It makes you unstuck. You don't have to wait for
your mind to move. That's the mistake. If you're overwhelmed,
you're stuck in anxiety, don't wait for your mind to move,
start moving your body. I'm not saying you've got to
(11:57):
go and become a bodybuilder. I'm not saying you've got
to go and lift the heaviest weights. I'm just saying
that whenever your mind feels slow, move your body faster.
I can't wait to dive into the next part, but
first a short break for our ads. Okay, we're back.
Let's dive right back in step number three. This one's
(12:19):
a big one. This is the one that is holding
everyone back because the number one question I get asked
is Jay, when's the right time? Is it too oversaturated? Now?
Should I have started three years ago? Like? What if
I start a month, will that be okay? Stop waiting
for the right time, Stop waiting, start before it feels safe.
(12:43):
Stop waiting for the right time, because there isn't one.
There isn't one. There's a beautiful proverb that says the
best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago,
and the next best time is today, right, So whatever
you're thinking of, those are the two choices. Should you
have started podcast five years ago? Yeah? Probably? Should you
(13:06):
have started that YouTube channel ten years ago? Probably? But
guess what you didn't, and neither did I. The best
time to start is now, that's what you have. I
remember when I started to create content, which was in
around twenty sixteen, I was five years behind the earliest YouTubers,
and I remember everyone saying to me that I was
(13:26):
a bit late to that space. When I started my podcast,
which was in twenty nineteen, everyone said it was too saturated.
I think at that time there were like seven hundred
thousand podcasts. I think today there's five million. So the
point is things are always going to be more saturated.
Things are always going to be more competitive. There are
always going to be more creators as time goes on.
(13:47):
So it's whether you want to start now when there
are five million podcasts or whether you're gonna wait five
years when there's ten million podcasts. Right, which one's better?
And so there's no perfect time to begin. That's a myth.
The truth is is the right time is a feeling
that shows up after you start, not before. And this
is backed by science too. The science shows that people
(14:09):
who take action before they feel ready develop greater confidence
through experience, not preparation. This is the mistake we make.
We think I can prepare to avoid or learning. Preparation
is important. I'm not going to take away from that,
but experience is incredible. It's an incredible teacher. Your brain
(14:33):
builds certainty from doing, not from waiting. So do this today.
Choose one thing you've been putting off. Instead of asking
is this the right time? Ask what's one move I
can make in the next ten minutes, Send the email,
record the draft, fill out the form, take the first
(14:54):
imperfect step. Readiness is not a requirement to result. Stop waiting.
Time won't invite you. You have to show up anyway.
We've been taught to wait for the right time, to
wait until we're more qualified, until we have more money,
(15:17):
more confidence, more clarity, until the fear goes away, until
we're ready, until someone gives us permission, until the timing
makes sense. But is the reality the right time doesn't
show up, you do, the timing won't feel perfect because
(15:38):
you're not supposed to feel certain before you grow. We've
been taught that good things come to those who wait,
But in real life, good things come to those who move,
who ask, who try, who don't wait for their turn
because they know no one's handing it to them. Stop
(15:58):
waiting for the right pame time. I can't say it enough.
Just stop waiting this idea that I'm going to wait
for miraculous alignment. I'm going to time it in the
perfect year. If you're timing it for by the time
that it's the perfect year, I promise you everyone's going
to be doing it that year. Right, Everyone's going to
be doing it that year because you waited for the
perfect year, which means everyone's going to feel it's the
(16:20):
perfect year, which by definition creates more competition for you.
Step number three a lot of us believe we've got
to get brilliance to make a difference, and actually persistence
beats talent and talented quitters. I'm sure you've seen someone
on TV before or on social media and thought, how
(16:42):
did they make it? I'm more talented than them, I
feel like I'm better than them at that How did
they make it? And I didn't? Well, they didn't sit
on the sidelines, they didn't quit, they kept going when
the talented people stepped away stepped back. The research shows
(17:02):
that students with less IQ but higher GRIT often outperformed
smarter but less persistent peers. In other words, deliberate, sustained
effort yielded stronger outcomes than raw talent. Think about that
(17:23):
for a second. There's no such thing as raw talent
being naturally gifted to be successful if they don't have persistence.
So if you feel like your talent's had a five
out of ten, yeah you should work on it, for sure,
you should build it. But if your consistency is out
of ten out of ten, that's going to average out
(17:43):
as seven and a half. But let's say someone's talent
is a nine out of ten, but their commitment, their
consistency is a two out of ten, Well, then you're
going to break that down to a five and a half.
They're two points behind you because of the average. Stop
waiting to feel good enough, Stop waiting to feel talented enough,
(18:05):
Stop waiting to feel like you're the best in the game.
There's a beautiful quote by zig Ziggler that I love.
You don't have to be great to start, but you
have to start to be great. Write this idea that
I have to be great when I start. I have
to have a video that goes viral. I have to
have a book that sells a million copies right off
(18:26):
the bat. That's the pressure we're putting on ourselves, and
we're all becoming paralyzed by the pressure of perfection instead
of making progress and being consistent and finding our genius
within that. One thing I want to address here is
this myth of you missed your window? How many times
(18:47):
if you ever had that experience and you feel I
missed my chance that could have been me. I could
have been happily married now I should have had that career.
Time didn't work. Oh wow, I just I wish I didn't.
I wish I didn't give up. Then here's the truth
(19:10):
that was the myth. Life rarely moves in straight lines.
There are always new entry points. A Yale study on
nonlinear careers found that people who start later in life
often outperform early starters in long term fulfillment and career satisfaction.
(19:32):
You didn't miss your shot. You just needed to stop
aiming at someone else's timeline. Think about that. You didn't
miss your shot. You just needed to stop aiming at
someone else's timeline. You didn't miss your chance. You just
needed to stop focusing on someone else's deadline. You didn't
(19:56):
miss your opportunity. You just needed to stop focusing on
other people's doors. One of my favorite quotes is from
Immam al Shaffi. He said, my heart is at ease
knowing what was meant for me will never miss me,
and that which misses me was never meant for me.
(20:18):
What missed you was never for you, and what is
for you will never miss you. We have to recognize
that where we are and what we've experienced, and the
talents and the skills you have, and the resilience you
have and the grit you have is the exact cocktail
that you need to create the future that you want.
(20:39):
So I want you to start labeling the fog differently,
name what's actually missing. People say I feel stuck, but
what they really mean is I'm overwhelmed, I'm afraid to fail.
I'm comparing myself to everyone. Right, I'm sure he can relate.
The process of effect labeling shows that naming emotions reduces
(21:04):
activity in the amygdala and restores prefrontal cortex function, aka
clear thinking. So here's what I want you to do today.
Open your notes app or journal and complete this sentence
right now. I feel stuck because then ask is this
about clarity, confidence or control. You can't fix what you
(21:28):
won't name. So when we say things like I'm just stuck,
imagine you were driving down a road and your maps
went off because you lost Wi Fi, you lost data,
and you end up and you're like, ohkay, I'm stuck. Cool.
How helpful is that information? Not at all? Not at all? Right.
(21:48):
But if you're like, hey, I'm at the intersection of
this road. In this road, I can see a hotel
on my right end corner. It's got this name. Okay,
let me think about where am I facing. Let me right,
It's much better to label it. It's much better to
know if you manage to get some reception back, you
could know where you were, You could place where you were,
(22:09):
And so labeling your emotions is so important, and you
can't fix what you won't name. The next step is
make peace with the plateau. You're not broken, You're in
between growth spurts. Neuroscience shows that periods of frustration or
boredom often precede breakthroughs. This is when the brain reorganizes
(22:33):
for deeper learning. So here's what I want you to
do today. Ask yourself, what's the skill or mindset I'm
being forced to build? Right now, Here's how I view
my entire life. I literally ask myself, what is the
skill I'm missing between where I am and where I
want to be? There's just a skill. It could be
public speaking, could be negotiation, could be communication. If you
(22:56):
want a promotion and you're not getting it, what is
the skill you're missing? Is the skill? Networking? Is the
skill relationship building? Is the skill presenting skills? Right? What
is it? Often we don't think it's a skill. We
think it's working harder, we think it's impressing someone. We
think it's making ourselves look better. What's the skill then? Right?
(23:18):
Three ways this stuck season might be strengthening you. You
want to realize where you are is a launchpad, not
a trap door. Where you're standing right now is going
to propel you forward, not pull you down. But when
we tell ourselves a story and a narrative that where
I am is the worst place ever, it forces us
(23:41):
to stay there. You're not stuck, You're stabilizing. That's a
part of growth. You're not broken. You're piecing things back
together in a new way. You're not lost. You're stepping
away from parts that weren't for you. You're not stuck.
(24:02):
You're learning to sit still with yourself. You're not behind.
You're moving at the speed of healing. You're not failing.
You're getting feedback that life didn't sugarcoat. You're not weak.
You're stretched and still standing. You're not falling apart. You're
undoing what was never meant to last. You're not confused.
(24:27):
You're finally seeing things clearly, even if it hurts. You're
not empty. You're unlearning the noise that used to fill
the void. You're not too late. You're right where your
next chapter starts. Next step, shrink the vision, save the dream.
(24:49):
Stuckness often comes from thinking too big all at once.
A lot of people say think big, have a big goal,
have a big vision. I'm not against that if that
works for you, but I think there are two types
of people, people who work well with a big dream
and people who work well with a small step. Know
which one you are. Some people are more motivated when
(25:10):
they know they're working towards something huge. Some people are
more motivated when they know they're working towards something small.
Because to some people, the big thing is overwhelming and scary,
and to some people the small thing is boring and irrelevant.
Have self awareness. Research on gold gradients shows that people
(25:33):
are more likely to keep going when they see quick,
early wins. Your brain needs small amounts of proof and evidence.
That's what it's looking for. Your brain needs small proofs.
So do this today. Instead of asking what my purpose is,
ask what's one thing I can finish today that moves
(25:57):
me an inch closer to where I want to go?
Then do it. Shrink the goal, don't shrink yourself. Stop
feeling the pressure to do something big. Start with small steps.
Start by making your bed. Start by answering one email.
Start by drinking a glass of water. Start by writing
(26:20):
the first sentence. Start by getting through the next hour,
not the whole year. Start with what's in front of you,
not what's expected of you. Start small enough that you
can't make excuses. Start often enough that it becomes who
you are. Because big things don't begin big, they begin
(26:46):
when you do. I really hope that this episode landed
with you. I hope it inspires you to make a
change in your life. I'm so excited to hear about
all the things you started because of this episode. Tag
me on Instagram, tag me on TikTok. I love seeing
your clips, I love seeing your posts. I want to
see what you started because of this episode, and I
(27:08):
can't wait to see where it goes. Five years from now,
ten years from now, fifteen years from now, to see
the incredible things that you achieve. Remember I'm forever in
your corner and I'm always rooting for you. I'll see
you soon. If this is the year that you're trying
to get creative, you're trying to build more, I need
you to listen to this episode with Rick Rubin on
(27:29):
how to break into your most creative self, how to
use unconventional methods that lead to success, and the secret
to genuinely loving what you do. If you're trying to
find your passion and your lane, Rick Rubin's episode is
the one for you. Just because I like it, That
doesn't give it any value, like as an artist, if
you like it, that's all of the value. That's the
(27:51):
success comes when you say I like this enough for
other people to see it.
You want to realize where you are is a launchpad,
not a trap door. Where you're standing right now is
going to propel you forward, not pull you down. But
when we tell ourselves a story and a narrative that
where I am is the worst place ever, it forces
us to stay there. You're not stuck, You're stabilizing. That's
(00:23):
a part of growth. You're not failing. You're getting feedback
that life didn't sugarcoat the number one Health and well
Inness podcast, Jay Shetty, Jay Sheddy Shetty, Hey, everyone, welcome
back to On Purpose. I'm Jay Sheddy, your host, and
(00:44):
I am so grateful that you've tuned back in. If
you're watching on YouTube, make sure you've subscribed to this
channel so that you never miss a video. And if
you're listening to this on Spotify, Apple, iHeart, or wherever
you get your podcasts, make sure you subscribe as well.
I don't want you to miss out on the exciting
guests and themes that we have coming up later this year. Now,
(01:06):
this episode is all about what to do when you
feel like nothing's working. I think we all go through
moments in life where it feels like everything and everyone
is against us. It can even feel like the world
is against us right. Things aren't going our way. We're
(01:27):
not experiencing those moments of luck. Maybe you're always late
for the bus, the train's never on time, your car's
breaking down, the kids are having a really tough time
at school. Maybe you didn't get the promotion you were
working towards. And what you're wondering is what do I
do when I feel like nothing's working? And sometimes we
(01:50):
get so disheartened, we get so depressed that we don't
even wonder that anymore. We just assume that this is
our life, this is all it is, and this is
how it will always be. If you feel stuck right now,
this episode is for you. If you feel like you're
in a rut or you've hit rock bottom, this is
(02:12):
for you. And if you're wondering how to build momentum
and get out of where you are, this episode is
for you. I also want you to pass this on
to someone who might benefit from it, because I'm sure
you have friends and family and people reaching out all
the time and saying, hey, if I'm honest with you,
nothing's working out right now, nothing's going in the right direction.
(02:37):
Before I jump in to how do we address this.
I want to share something known as the frequency illusion.
Now we've all experienced this in our life. Think about it.
Have you ever said to yourself, I really want to
buy a red car or a certain Maycore model, and
all of a sudden, all you see on the roads
(02:58):
is that car. Every single car is that color, every
single car is that model. Now are there more of
that car on the road just at that moment in time?
Are there certainly more red cars on the streets? The
answers no. The reality is the frequency illusion is at play.
Because you're consciously thinking about something, you now see it
(03:22):
appear more than normal. We all do this, And whether
it's a red car, or whether it's slightly salmon colored,
or whether it's slightly dark maroon, you still think it's
a red car. So when you're conscious of something, you
frequently see it. Therefore, if you believe that nothing's working
(03:46):
for you, you will notice all the signs that nothing's
working for you. And if you believe that things are
moving in your favor, you will notice all the signs
that things are moving in your favor. I guarantee you
there was someone you smiled at yesterday and they smiled
(04:06):
back but I also guarantee you there's someone you looked
at the other day smiled and they didn't smile back.
What you remembered was based on what you noticed. What
you notice becomes your reality. You can either notice when
people help you open the door, take a step towards
you give you an opportunity, or you can notice when
(04:29):
they didn't open the door, when they shut it in
your face, or when there was no path forward. What
we notice becomes a reality. With that, I want to
dive into point one. Stop trying to feel motivated. This
is one of the biggest mistakes we all make. We
(04:50):
want to feel motivated, we want to feel excited, we
want to feel enthusiastic. What I've learned, very very clearly
is if you wait for motivation, you'll be waiting a
long long time. People who make moves don't wait for motivation.
People who make progress don't wait for motivation. Actually, they
(05:14):
do things when they don't feel motivated. That's the key
to success. That's the key to discipline, is doing things
when we don't feel motivated. Motivation is this myth, this
myth that you need to feel ready to take action. Instead,
we need to focus on building momentum triggering momentum. The
(05:38):
truth is action creates motivation, not the other way around.
A lot of us think that I'll feel motivated, then
i'll take action. It's the other way around. Take action
and then you'll feel motivated. Now this idea is actually
backed by science. The zygenic effect shows that starting a task,
(05:58):
even imperfectly, creates mental tension that keeps us engaged until
we finish. This psychological principle, once you understand it will
transform the way you live. It will stop you from
waiting to feel ready. Here's how it works. Your brain
remembers unfinished tasks more than finished ones. When you start something,
(06:23):
even just a little, your brain creates a mental loop
that stays open. That tension makes you want to go
back and complete it. That's why it's easier to keep
working after you've started, but so hard to begin. Motivation
kicks in after momentum, not before. So today, don't try
(06:46):
to finish the whole thing. Start badly. Start briefly. All
you have to do is set a timer for three minutes,
open the document, do one push up, write one sentence.
That's it, because your mind will force you to go
back to an unfinished task. If a task is not
(07:06):
yet begun, you won't have motivation or momentum. Once the
task is begun, your mind and your brain are somewhat
committed to finish it. The mistake we make is we say, well,
I'm gonna do all of it today. I'm going to
finish the whole thing today, and that becomes an insurmountable task.
The weight is too heavy to carry and we end
(07:29):
up dropping the ball and feeling like failures. So the
mistake we make is we live in one of two extremes.
I'm gonna do nothing or I can't do anything because
everything's against me, or I'm gonna do everything perfectly, brilliantly, completely,
and both of those mindsets set us up for failure.
Script one video, post one podcast. Just start. Once you
(07:54):
start the Zygoniic effect, does the rest. Stop looking for motive,
start small, stop looking for perfection, start messy, Stop waiting
for clarity, start moving, Stop waiting to be confident, start anyway.
(08:16):
Stop waiting for the timing to feel right. Start where
you are, because the time will never feel right. You'll
never feel ready because you weren't meant to. You were
just meant to get going. Here's what I want you
to do today. Pick one small task you've been avoiding,
(08:37):
set a five minute timer and just stop. Don't aim
to finish, aim to begin. Momentum will meet you there,
because remember, the first thing you make won't be great.
The first video might feel awkward, the first post might
get ignored, the first idea might not land. The first
(09:02):
time you put yourself out there, you'll probably cringe. You'll
overthink it, you'll question yourself, you'll wonder if it's even
been worth it. But remember this, the first thing you
do won't be the last. Keep going. You don't need motivation,
(09:22):
you need movement. Stop putting it off, Stop postponing your
dreams and your ideas and everything you want to do.
All it does is put more pressure on it. All
it does is make you watch others who've already got started.
The reason why people are ahead of you is not
because they're better, it's because they started earlier. Just let
(09:45):
that sink in for a moment. People just started earlier.
And what happens when people start early? People judge, people criticize.
When people start to do anything, everyone goes, what's that?
Don't really think it's going to be worth it don't
really think it's going to work. You break through that
by making movement step number two, break the brain loop.
(10:07):
Here's what you have to do. Do something pointlessly physical
when everything else feels stuck. Your brain is usually stuck
in over analysis and mental clutter. Moving physically changes everything.
This is back by science. Studies show that repetitive physical
actions walking, cleaning, showering activate the defunct mode network, which
(10:31):
improves problem solving and calms mental noise. That's from Harvard
Medical School in twenty fifteen. So here do this today.
Fold laundry. You gotta do it anyway. Wash the dishes.
You got to do it anyway. Walk around the block,
no phone, no podcast, just you and the motion. Your
body can reset a stuck mind. Here's how I think
(10:55):
about it. When your mind is stuck, move your body,
and when your body is stuck, move your mind. It's
the opposite. Sometimes we get so stuck in our head
and we're just trying to figure it all out in
our head. I'm sure you've had those moments of crashing out.
We just go round and round in circles in your mind, negotiating, analyzing,
(11:15):
feeling overwhelmed. Instead of all of that just move your body.
I've heard this from people first hand. Whether you're stuck
after a breakup, whether you're stuck because you didn't get promoted,
whether you're stuck because you're feeling like you don't have
energy or you feel like you don't have motivation. The
people who end up at a kickboxing class, end up
walking around the block, end up going for a run,
(11:36):
end up hanging out with their friend at the gym.
Even just that act gets you out of that rut.
It makes you unstuck. You don't have to wait for
your mind to move. That's the mistake. If you're overwhelmed,
you're stuck in anxiety, don't wait for your mind to move,
start moving your body. I'm not saying you've got to
(11:57):
go and become a bodybuilder. I'm not saying you've got
to go and lift the heaviest weights. I'm just saying
that whenever your mind feels slow, move your body faster.
I can't wait to dive into the next part, but
first a short break for our ads. Okay, we're back.
Let's dive right back in step number three. This one's
(12:19):
a big one. This is the one that is holding
everyone back because the number one question I get asked
is Jay, when's the right time? Is it too oversaturated? Now?
Should I have started three years ago? Like? What if
I start a month, will that be okay? Stop waiting
for the right time, Stop waiting, start before it feels safe.
(12:43):
Stop waiting for the right time, because there isn't one.
There isn't one. There's a beautiful proverb that says the
best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago,
and the next best time is today, right, So whatever
you're thinking of, those are the two choices. Should you
have started podcast five years ago? Yeah? Probably? Should you
(13:06):
have started that YouTube channel ten years ago? Probably? But
guess what you didn't, and neither did I. The best
time to start is now, that's what you have. I
remember when I started to create content, which was in
around twenty sixteen, I was five years behind the earliest YouTubers,
and I remember everyone saying to me that I was
(13:26):
a bit late to that space. When I started my podcast,
which was in twenty nineteen, everyone said it was too saturated.
I think at that time there were like seven hundred
thousand podcasts. I think today there's five million. So the
point is things are always going to be more saturated.
Things are always going to be more competitive. There are
always going to be more creators as time goes on.
(13:47):
So it's whether you want to start now when there
are five million podcasts or whether you're gonna wait five
years when there's ten million podcasts. Right, which one's better?
And so there's no perfect time to begin. That's a myth.
The truth is is the right time is a feeling
that shows up after you start, not before. And this
is backed by science too. The science shows that people
(14:09):
who take action before they feel ready develop greater confidence
through experience, not preparation. This is the mistake we make.
We think I can prepare to avoid or learning. Preparation
is important. I'm not going to take away from that,
but experience is incredible. It's an incredible teacher. Your brain
(14:33):
builds certainty from doing, not from waiting. So do this today.
Choose one thing you've been putting off. Instead of asking
is this the right time? Ask what's one move I
can make in the next ten minutes, Send the email,
record the draft, fill out the form, take the first
(14:54):
imperfect step. Readiness is not a requirement to result. Stop waiting.
Time won't invite you. You have to show up anyway.
We've been taught to wait for the right time, to
wait until we're more qualified, until we have more money,
(15:17):
more confidence, more clarity, until the fear goes away, until
we're ready, until someone gives us permission, until the timing
makes sense. But is the reality the right time doesn't
show up, you do, the timing won't feel perfect because
(15:38):
you're not supposed to feel certain before you grow. We've
been taught that good things come to those who wait,
But in real life, good things come to those who move,
who ask, who try, who don't wait for their turn
because they know no one's handing it to them. Stop
(15:58):
waiting for the right pame time. I can't say it enough.
Just stop waiting this idea that I'm going to wait
for miraculous alignment. I'm going to time it in the
perfect year. If you're timing it for by the time
that it's the perfect year, I promise you everyone's going
to be doing it that year. Right, Everyone's going to
be doing it that year because you waited for the
perfect year, which means everyone's going to feel it's the
(16:20):
perfect year, which by definition creates more competition for you.
Step number three a lot of us believe we've got
to get brilliance to make a difference, and actually persistence
beats talent and talented quitters. I'm sure you've seen someone
on TV before or on social media and thought, how
(16:42):
did they make it? I'm more talented than them, I
feel like I'm better than them at that How did
they make it? And I didn't? Well, they didn't sit
on the sidelines, they didn't quit, they kept going when
the talented people stepped away stepped back. The research shows
(17:02):
that students with less IQ but higher GRIT often outperformed
smarter but less persistent peers. In other words, deliberate, sustained
effort yielded stronger outcomes than raw talent. Think about that
(17:23):
for a second. There's no such thing as raw talent
being naturally gifted to be successful if they don't have persistence.
So if you feel like your talent's had a five
out of ten, yeah you should work on it, for sure,
you should build it. But if your consistency is out
of ten out of ten, that's going to average out
(17:43):
as seven and a half. But let's say someone's talent
is a nine out of ten, but their commitment, their
consistency is a two out of ten, Well, then you're
going to break that down to a five and a half.
They're two points behind you because of the average. Stop
waiting to feel good enough, Stop waiting to feel talented enough,
(18:05):
Stop waiting to feel like you're the best in the game.
There's a beautiful quote by zig Ziggler that I love.
You don't have to be great to start, but you
have to start to be great. Write this idea that
I have to be great when I start. I have
to have a video that goes viral. I have to
have a book that sells a million copies right off
(18:26):
the bat. That's the pressure we're putting on ourselves, and
we're all becoming paralyzed by the pressure of perfection instead
of making progress and being consistent and finding our genius
within that. One thing I want to address here is
this myth of you missed your window? How many times
(18:47):
if you ever had that experience and you feel I
missed my chance that could have been me. I could
have been happily married now I should have had that career.
Time didn't work. Oh wow, I just I wish I didn't.
I wish I didn't give up. Then here's the truth
(19:10):
that was the myth. Life rarely moves in straight lines.
There are always new entry points. A Yale study on
nonlinear careers found that people who start later in life
often outperform early starters in long term fulfillment and career satisfaction.
(19:32):
You didn't miss your shot. You just needed to stop
aiming at someone else's timeline. Think about that. You didn't
miss your shot. You just needed to stop aiming at
someone else's timeline. You didn't miss your chance. You just
needed to stop focusing on someone else's deadline. You didn't
(19:56):
miss your opportunity. You just needed to stop focusing on
other people's doors. One of my favorite quotes is from
Immam al Shaffi. He said, my heart is at ease
knowing what was meant for me will never miss me,
and that which misses me was never meant for me.
(20:18):
What missed you was never for you, and what is
for you will never miss you. We have to recognize
that where we are and what we've experienced, and the
talents and the skills you have, and the resilience you
have and the grit you have is the exact cocktail
that you need to create the future that you want.
(20:39):
So I want you to start labeling the fog differently,
name what's actually missing. People say I feel stuck, but
what they really mean is I'm overwhelmed, I'm afraid to fail.
I'm comparing myself to everyone. Right, I'm sure he can relate.
The process of effect labeling shows that naming emotions reduces
(21:04):
activity in the amygdala and restores prefrontal cortex function, aka
clear thinking. So here's what I want you to do today.
Open your notes app or journal and complete this sentence
right now. I feel stuck because then ask is this
about clarity, confidence or control. You can't fix what you
(21:28):
won't name. So when we say things like I'm just stuck,
imagine you were driving down a road and your maps
went off because you lost Wi Fi, you lost data,
and you end up and you're like, ohkay, I'm stuck. Cool.
How helpful is that information? Not at all? Not at all? Right.
(21:48):
But if you're like, hey, I'm at the intersection of
this road. In this road, I can see a hotel
on my right end corner. It's got this name. Okay,
let me think about where am I facing. Let me right,
It's much better to label it. It's much better to
know if you manage to get some reception back, you
could know where you were, You could place where you were,
(22:09):
And so labeling your emotions is so important, and you
can't fix what you won't name. The next step is
make peace with the plateau. You're not broken, You're in
between growth spurts. Neuroscience shows that periods of frustration or
boredom often precede breakthroughs. This is when the brain reorganizes
(22:33):
for deeper learning. So here's what I want you to
do today. Ask yourself, what's the skill or mindset I'm
being forced to build? Right now, Here's how I view
my entire life. I literally ask myself, what is the
skill I'm missing between where I am and where I
want to be? There's just a skill. It could be
public speaking, could be negotiation, could be communication. If you
(22:56):
want a promotion and you're not getting it, what is
the skill you're missing? Is the skill? Networking? Is the
skill relationship building? Is the skill presenting skills? Right? What
is it? Often we don't think it's a skill. We
think it's working harder, we think it's impressing someone. We
think it's making ourselves look better. What's the skill then? Right?
(23:18):
Three ways this stuck season might be strengthening you. You
want to realize where you are is a launchpad, not
a trap door. Where you're standing right now is going
to propel you forward, not pull you down. But when
we tell ourselves a story and a narrative that where
I am is the worst place ever, it forces us
(23:41):
to stay there. You're not stuck, You're stabilizing. That's a
part of growth. You're not broken. You're piecing things back
together in a new way. You're not lost. You're stepping
away from parts that weren't for you. You're not stuck.
(24:02):
You're learning to sit still with yourself. You're not behind.
You're moving at the speed of healing. You're not failing.
You're getting feedback that life didn't sugarcoat. You're not weak.
You're stretched and still standing. You're not falling apart. You're
undoing what was never meant to last. You're not confused.
(24:27):
You're finally seeing things clearly, even if it hurts. You're
not empty. You're unlearning the noise that used to fill
the void. You're not too late. You're right where your
next chapter starts. Next step, shrink the vision, save the dream.
(24:49):
Stuckness often comes from thinking too big all at once.
A lot of people say think big, have a big goal,
have a big vision. I'm not against that if that
works for you, but I think there are two types
of people, people who work well with a big dream
and people who work well with a small step. Know
which one you are. Some people are more motivated when
(25:10):
they know they're working towards something huge. Some people are
more motivated when they know they're working towards something small.
Because to some people, the big thing is overwhelming and scary,
and to some people the small thing is boring and irrelevant.
Have self awareness. Research on gold gradients shows that people
(25:33):
are more likely to keep going when they see quick,
early wins. Your brain needs small amounts of proof and evidence.
That's what it's looking for. Your brain needs small proofs.
So do this today. Instead of asking what my purpose is,
ask what's one thing I can finish today that moves
(25:57):
me an inch closer to where I want to go?
Then do it. Shrink the goal, don't shrink yourself. Stop
feeling the pressure to do something big. Start with small steps.
Start by making your bed. Start by answering one email.
Start by drinking a glass of water. Start by writing
(26:20):
the first sentence. Start by getting through the next hour,
not the whole year. Start with what's in front of you,
not what's expected of you. Start small enough that you
can't make excuses. Start often enough that it becomes who
you are. Because big things don't begin big, they begin
(26:46):
when you do. I really hope that this episode landed
with you. I hope it inspires you to make a
change in your life. I'm so excited to hear about
all the things you started because of this episode. Tag
me on Instagram, tag me on TikTok. I love seeing
your clips, I love seeing your posts. I want to
see what you started because of this episode, and I
(27:08):
can't wait to see where it goes. Five years from now,
ten years from now, fifteen years from now, to see
the incredible things that you achieve. Remember I'm forever in
your corner and I'm always rooting for you. I'll see
you soon. If this is the year that you're trying
to get creative, you're trying to build more, I need
you to listen to this episode with Rick Rubin on
(27:29):
how to break into your most creative self, how to
use unconventional methods that lead to success, and the secret
to genuinely loving what you do. If you're trying to
find your passion and your lane, Rick Rubin's episode is
the one for you. Just because I like it, That
doesn't give it any value, like as an artist, if
you like it, that's all of the value. That's the
(27:51):
success comes when you say I like this enough for
other people to see it.
Host
Jay Shetty
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