November 28, 2023 • 49 mins
This week, a favorite from the early releases - the "Magical Wisdom" of actress, best-selling author, and dear friend, Jenifer Lewis. Rosie and Jenifer have an uproarious and deep conversation about life, mental illness, and self-care.
We'll be back with Murray Hill on December 5th!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Well, hey everybody, it's me Rosie O'Donnell. How are you.
I'm good, I'm good boy. It's been one hell of
a week.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Huh.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
You know the thing about podcasts is they're not live,
so we record them as close to the drop date
as we can. But things happen in the world, and
you know, today I think what I'm still thinking of
and what has rocked my soul, and once again, you know,
open the Columbine wound that happened to all of us
(00:42):
with it being pretty much the first huge school shooting
that we all remember April twentieth, nineteen ninety nine, and
it brings me back to this latest school shooting in Nashville,
where three children and three adults were killed, and you know,
it overwhelms me. I don't understand how this keeps happening
(01:06):
in our country and how senators and congress people feel
like it's okay to say on the news the day
after this horror that nothing can be done. How is
that possible? Nothing can be done? I'm sick of hearing it,
and I think a vast majority of Americans are too.
(01:29):
We need to ban assault weapons, and I wrote that
on my TikTok and people wrote in oh my second Amendment, right, well,
let's amend the amendment. Then I think that automatic weapons,
assault rifles weapons of war. Sorry, civilians cannot have them.
(01:49):
And that's the point where we're at, you know. I
remember talking to Rory Kennedy last week and her telling
me that the top scientists in the world say we
could have six maybe ten years before it's not fixable
what we've done to the climate. And we're in an
emergency and not fixable, right, what's going to happen? I mean,
(02:15):
you can't just pretend you don't see these things. Wilful
blindness is going to end up ruining the earth, you know.
And we have wilful blindness in this country about assault weapons.
And when we had an assault weapon ban, there were
much less school shootings. You know, the statistics, everybody can
(02:37):
look them up. We've known them for too long.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
You know.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
You got to stand up and force our representatives to
speak for the people. You can't love guns more than
you love kids. Really sad, really hard, and it's really
hard to keep fighting the same fight. I remember when
I spoke out after Columbine to Tom Sellek, who then
(03:05):
was a representative of the NRA. You know, it was
a big controversy. How could you say that? How could
we not have said it? Look, what's happened since a
thousand school shootings, since Columbine in America. It's crazy, it's crazy,
(03:26):
and we can't live this way, and we have to
stand up and say it. You know, I've been trying
not to listen to the news because what's going on
in Israel and the streets and them fighting against net
and Yahoo, and in France the fights and the protests
against Macron who wants to change the retirement age by
two years. And you know, I saw some photos, some
(03:49):
video of people eating in a French bistro and outside
trash cans, on fire, road blockades, people eating, Just you know,
what's happened to our world? Very very sad. Really is
well now that I brought the show to a complete
halt and nobody wants to listen. We have a great
(04:10):
guest today, we really do. And we talk a little
bit about mental health. We talk a little bit about Columbine,
which you know started me on my journey and medication
of medication of my mental health issues, and I am
so incredibly grateful. But the guest is Jennifer Lewis. Jennifer Lewis,
(04:30):
who is one of the most talented people I have
ever met in my life. I saw her in nineteen
ninety four in her one woman show, The Diva Is Dismissed,
and I was like, I'm in love with her. I'm
in love with her. I met her then, but before then,
before then, I knew who she was because I saw
Bet Miller in concerts so many times that I could
(04:52):
recognize her backup singers when they weren't with her, you know,
I mean, that's a whole different gig. You know, I
was doing a game show and well, we tell the
story in it. But she's here today, and she has
written two books, The Mother of Black Hollywood and Walking
in My Joy in the Streets. You know, she's amazing
(05:15):
and I love her philosophy of life. I love her
perspective of the world. I love her ability to have
self insight, and I love the way she carries herself.
I really do. Years and years ago, maybe thirty years ago,
we all were in Laguna to see Bette Midler and
(05:37):
Jennifer was performing with Bet, I believe at that time,
and she was there with Mark Shaman and me and
a bunch of people. I saw them right after they
came back, and they were all singing the song that
Jennifer made up when she was in Laguna because she
got there and she was the only black person that
she saw in the whole entire town. So she made
(05:57):
up this song that goes something like this, Hey what folks,
I'm sorry I could not get here soon. I'm the
only black girl in Lagoona And we would sing it
over and over and over. So this interview has no
beginning because we just jump in right. She sees me
(06:20):
on the FaceTime thing and I see her and we're going,
you know, we start talking the words to hey, white girl,
I'm sorry I could not get here sooner, but we
never explain what it is. So there is a little
explanation about your little song. You're gonna hear us do
a little staccato version of Anyway, she's here and we're
talking about everything, and I just adore her, and I
(06:42):
know that you will too. So fair warning, there's a
lot of cursing in this episode because when she and
I sit around, that's what we do. So you might
not want to listen at work or else. Put your
headphones on. I mean, it's not like so much cursing
that you're watching, you know, like a Tarantino film, but
there's enough curse saying that you could get in trouble
by someone saying, what the fuck are you listening to?
(07:03):
You know what I'm saying. This is Onward with Rosie O'Donnell,
and this is episode three.
Speaker 3 (07:21):
Oh honey, hi baby, how are you?
Speaker 2 (07:24):
Oh girl? So much shit is going on?
Speaker 1 (07:27):
What's going down?
Speaker 2 (07:28):
What's going down? I'm gonna tell you all the good shit?
Speaker 1 (07:31):
All right?
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Hey wife, folks, I'm sorry, bitches.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
I could not be here sooner. You're the only black
girl in Laguna.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Only motherfucker.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Oh my, how long ago was that, Jennifer Lewis? That
must have been a good thirty years ago.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
It had to be thirty.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
Yes, we've known each other a long time.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Oh my god, Roro.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
Do you remember the first time we met? Where it
was Mark Davis? Nope, it was on the talk show
Third Degree? Do you remember that you and Charlowe were
trying to get us to guess on the Burt Convy
hosted Third Degree, a very short lived game show, And
(08:18):
I looked at you and went, oh my god, those
are the horless. And I said to the person next
to me, I think I have to disqualify myself. I
know exactly the.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Tye.
Speaker 1 (08:31):
What's my line? Exactly?
Speaker 2 (08:33):
What's my life? Who is that bitch? Two loud singing
wars on a game show trying to hide who they are?
Speaker 1 (08:41):
Exactly?
Speaker 2 (08:42):
Let's hall it. I actually just got some flowers from bed.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
Oh how nice.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
Yeah, she sent me for the star on the Hollywood
Walk of Fans.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
And how exciting was that? Jennifer Lewis.
Speaker 2 (08:52):
It was a perfect day. Yeah, I mean it went
off without a hitch, and I was so happy. I
wore the yellow because I looked like a bird of paradise.
Speaker 1 (09:02):
You look beautiful.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
I just yeah, And I was telling the kids to
vote that shit went vorrow. I was very happy about that.
Debbie Allen and Mark Shaman showed up. It was It
was the perfect day. And I knew you and Kathy
were working that day, so I didn't want to bother
the y'all. Maybe y'all were working.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
Well, we would always show up for you. Are you kidding?
We are in our sixties now, dol. How does that feel?
Speaker 2 (09:27):
I just turned sixty six? You know what?
Speaker 1 (09:30):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (09:31):
It feels fucking good.
Speaker 1 (09:33):
I think so too.
Speaker 3 (09:34):
What happens is the.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
Magic of wisdom reveals itself.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
I agree.
Speaker 3 (09:43):
I mean so so little stresses me out.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
Now.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
I'm like, taxi, bitch, get the fuck out of here
with that.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
Yes, I mean really you saw come on, drop all
the shit that didn't work when you ate your sixties,
and then you're like onward into whatever comes next. Because
we're in that final third. Honey.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Absolutely, we're in.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
That last thirty years. If we're lucky, you know.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
And you know you know what I tell people, So
I said, listen very carefully. I got about thirty summers.
You don't get one. They're mine.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
I love that. I love that I know more of
who I am and I like that girl, right, It's
one thing to walk around to me.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
I love myself. No, fuck you, bitch, Do you like yourself?
Speaker 2 (10:29):
I like me?
Speaker 1 (10:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
I just got back from Africa and I was standing
at the tip of the Motherland with those waves pounding
on those ancient stones out there, and I stood there
and I said it out loud, I said, I like me,
go get them Jenny. Yes, it's that Jenny, not that Jennifer.
(10:52):
Motherfucking Lewis. I'm talking about that Jenny.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
That little girl in Saint Louis.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
Absolutely of the Saint Louis Lewis's only you can say
that's right.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
And I never forgot it when you open your shirt
with that Oh my god, in love with this woman.
What am I gonna do? Right?
Speaker 2 (11:10):
You did?
Speaker 3 (11:11):
You loved me, You loved me from the start.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
Well, honey, you're so spectacular. It's hard to keep your
eyes off you. You steal every show you're in, every movie,
every part you like. I'm like, fucking, there's Jennifer Lewis again.
Speaker 2 (11:24):
You know.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
And you kept going and going and going and going,
and I'm so proud of all your accomplishments. And black
at you, I mean really, honey.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
Black at you, baby, black at you. I've seen you
in your dramatic acting work. You're so good. I just
sit here and go, there's my baby. Ah, girl, there's
my baby doing it all. Funny girl, dramatic girl, good
human being, honest. It's that honesty that excites me more
(11:53):
than anything.
Speaker 1 (11:53):
Same with me.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
I tell people, Yeah, I tell people, bitch, there's no
shortcut to greatness. No, you gotta overturn every stone you
don't get to skip around the truth. That's why they
say the truth, the old truth, nothing but the truth. Yes, indeed,
so I admire that in you. I really do. Just
just they call it down to earth, but it's it's
(12:16):
more powerful than that. It's being in the.
Speaker 1 (12:18):
Moment, the moment present.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
So true. Yeah, so important.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
And you know the things that I couldn't stop from
little Row when I was a kid, to big Row
now is the need to always tell what was happening
in my life. And you know, I think it comes
from a childhood of abuse. It comes from having to
be hyper sensitive to what people's moods are, you know,
(12:46):
and then trying to figure out my own in the
midst of that.
Speaker 3 (12:50):
Yeah, where's that shoe coming from?
Speaker 2 (12:52):
Yes, where's that shoe from?
Speaker 1 (12:53):
Mama?
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Coming from? Shoe? You don't even know what it's you now,
and I gotta tell you Roe all Oh god, I'm
so excited to even say this. I feel so free
in my life, not bound by waiting for somebody to
let me know if I got the gig. You see.
Sure it's been a while since that kind of shit,
since our audition for anything, but back in the day,
(13:16):
coming up with that do they want me? Am I
good enough? I actually had a step up on them.
Though I knew I had a gift, they couldn't really
fuck with me. I would walk into an audition room
and see all of them sitting on the toilet, right,
you see, So I wasn't fucking intimidated. But the point
I want to make about that honesty is I have
(13:39):
no secrets. I gave them all up in the two
books I've written, which are beautiful. Yeah, here it is, bitches.
Here's the molestation, here's the sex addiction, Here's the bipolar disorder.
Here it all is laid down on the paper. Take
it and run with it. Because once you read all
that shit, all you got to do is come back
(13:59):
to me. And all I can tell you is look
at me now, right right, no stone overturned. You know,
I swim downstream. I don't have to go upstream anymore, right,
And you know.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
It is so freeing. That's exactly the word that I
would use. Like something changed at fifty. It didn't bother me.
I didn't think anything of it, but something about sixty,
Like in my mind, the people who are sixty are
like Vivian Vance, you know, yeah, say to Thompson from family,
like those people are all sixty and now I'm one
of them.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
You know, right, And and I remember my great aunts
when they were in their sixties, how they had so
many health issues. Right, And you know you can live
long now if you take care of yourself. We know
how now, how to eat. We know we have to
get up and move our bodies. We know we have
to be honest. Going back to that, keep the stress off.
(14:52):
It's stress that causes all these diseases. You know, when
you are in fact dis ease. Now, how do you
fuck with that? You keep people away from you that
are trying to quatch your joy? Yes, I mean that
is that is a real thing because you know me,
when I get up, I get up skipping. Yes, I'll
(15:13):
wake the fuck up and skip by the big Come on, bitch,
just bring a day.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
Yes, fucking sun is up and you know, and then
you drop down to a full split with no problem.
I've seen you do it, girl, I've seen you do
it girl.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
You know I've always been athletic.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
You know, I played racquetball, softball, did pilates for damn
near thirty years. Yoga Yoga was real important to to
center myself, you know, especially with the bipolar disorder, right,
the mania and the depression. And I tell people, you know,
once she the first thirty five years of my life,
I was depressed. I didn't really know it. Shit, I
(15:53):
just thought everybody cried at night. Shit, right, you know,
living in the world, that's you know that you just
break the fuck down. What was that movie with Holly
Hunter or she would just break the fuck down? An
old movie.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
Broadcast about But yes, yes, I.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
Remember when I first saw that, I was like, oh
that's how I am.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Yeah, breaked out a fucking aunt go across the street.
Oh look at that poor aunt.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
Right, And you know, it's just it was lightly right.
So when I was diagnosed, I really wanted to I
was like, God, damn, that does describe me.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
Hey, don't go away, We'll be right back with more.
Jennifer Lewis, it was nineteen ninety when you got diagnosed
(16:56):
and had your life become unmanageable, that you finally went
to get a diagnosis, or had you always been in therapy.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
No, it was the height of the AIDS epidemic. I
felt I fell apart, girl, I mean, I found myself
on the floor screaming, and just so happens. A girlfriend
that I really respected, she said to me, Jennifer, you
got to get some help.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
I'm like, bitch, I'm Jennifer Little. There's only no fucking help.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
But when all of my friends started dying like that,
I knew something was wrong. I would go to auditions
and literally fall apart. I remember auditioning for thirty something
and Peter Wharton looking at me and said, what's wrong.
You can do this. I've seen your work just fell apart.
And it was when that started happening, I was like, Okay,
(17:43):
time to do something, and I got in therapy. The
first two years, she was just a captive audience.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
Yeah, I mean I know exactly that feeling.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
Yeah. She she would ask me, Jennifer, why do you performing? Yeah,
I'm like, no, bitch, this is what's going on.
Speaker 1 (17:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
So, when you thought to get to those real feelings
that are really deep in your soul from the childhood
abuse and the acting out so many years and running, running, running, right,
you just find out you're going to meet yourself when
you get there.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
So, now, when they told you the diagnosis, because when
I got diagnosed with severe depression, it was right after
Columbine and I had this two little babies, and I
was waking up every night thinking somebody was in my
house with a gun, that kids were going to be
killed in schools. I couldn't I couldn't fathom how this
was happening in my world, and it caused me such duress.
(18:39):
I couldn't sleep and I couldn't eat, I couldn't stop crying.
I could hardly do my show without like squeezing all
my muscles to try to stop myself from having feelings.
And so this doctor said to me, you're going to
go on these medicines. You're severe panic, you have severe PhD,
you have severe you know, a depression like I've never seen,
(18:59):
and you need to be medicated. And I said okay,
because I was in a mess. And I said how
long am I going to have to take these? And
she said the rest of your life? And I was like, okay,
I get it.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Yeah, you know I've been medicated for now about thirty
five years.
Speaker 1 (19:15):
I would say, yeah for me since ninety nine.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Yeah, I get up every morning, I take three pills
and I go in about my business. You know, ain't
no shame in my game. Bring it come on, y'all,
let's get it together. This shit is real. Yes, I
mean you can't believe it at first. You're like, oh, honey,
I can't get on that shit. That shit's going to
take my edge, right. Well, no, it didn't take my edge.
(19:38):
It put me in a place where a level. I
wasn't high high, and I wasn't low low, right. I
was in a level place where I could enjoy my life,
enjoy my success.
Speaker 3 (19:49):
So I still I take care of myself.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
I managed, and all I can say is that, you know,
look at me now, bitches exactly.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
I still got a big old smile on my face.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
No you do anything from you. Jennifer Lewis, I was
very moved during the height of Kanye's severe mental issue
trauma that he's going through that you really reached out
in a beautiful way. I saw you on a bunch
of interviews and you know, you're like, call me, call
me kid, And I kind of felt the same way.
You know, I was like, yeah, I wish I could
(20:23):
reach him, you know all of it. It seemed to
me that I know he had a traumatic brain injury
when he got in that car accident before he was
known and who was living with his mom, and then
I think when he lost his mom, something just shattered
inside of him.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
You know, you know, mental illness is one thing, but
I'm not, certainly not saying Kanye is evil by any means.
I just know a lot of people that are borderline
personality disorder.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
Mecho.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
There's a meanness that comes with it, and I'm like,
you know what, that's unacceptable. I'm bipolar and I can
be mean. Okay, maybe three times a year, okay, maybe four,
but come on, cruel. I mean waking up and saying,
you know, I'm going deaf Khan five on the Jews, No, hey, hey, hey,
come here, come here? Hey yeah hey, yes, you know,
(21:13):
we got people down south with torches going. The Jews
will not replace me. We don't need that bullshit. What
you want to start with all those followers a silvil war?
Speaker 1 (21:22):
Right?
Speaker 3 (21:23):
The fuck is.
Speaker 2 (21:23):
Wrong with you? Shut the fuck up? And I meant
that because I was mad. But the the undercurrent of
that is the undercurrent of that is Kanye, come here, yes,
come here, pup it, come here. And you know my
(21:46):
name is Jennifer Lewis, and I understand what you're going.
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Through totally you're not alone.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
But you cannot if they're not ready, There's nothing you
can do. There's nothing you can do. There's nothing you
can do. Yeah, poor Babby, he's gonna I just hope
that he that he can find his way. I really do,
because he means a lot to a lot of people. Yes,
he has a huge following. These kids listen to him.
(22:14):
They're very protective of him. I've certainly found that out.
When I tell him to shut the fuck, they're like Auntie,
back off Kanye. My response to them with no, go
fuck yourself right. That baby's got some issues, and how
about you go take care of yours right, And don't
roll up on me, bitch, because I.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
Know who I am exactly. Hey, y'all can't drag me.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
No, I've been fighting out here for you for a
ten thousand years. Whether it was breast cancer, whether it
was AIDS, whether it was the community. I don't care
what it is, civil rights. I know who I am.
Don't come for me, right, Don't come.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
For me, especially because you know you tend to mother everyone,
the mother of black Hollywood that you are, absolutely and
you know he's an orphan. Absolutely, This little boys sort
of lost in the world alone, is how I look
at him. Everyone goes, why do you look at him
as a little boy. I'm like, I don't know, but
I see the child that he was, and I just.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
That's arrested development. If that's not arrested development as its height,
what is I mean?
Speaker 3 (23:12):
He is a baby.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
He's a baby to us, Yes, and we are here
to say, hey, I've been through it. I know what
you're going through.
Speaker 1 (23:22):
Not come here, let me show you your way out.
Let me show you.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
Come here.
Speaker 2 (23:26):
You said right here, and let me tell you a
thing or two, or for that matters, show you a
thing or two.
Speaker 1 (23:33):
Right here.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
It is in black and white. Here's that scared little girl,
right Here's that baby. Here's that baby that was molested
by the past of her church. Here's another baby that
was abused and beaten and still have the scars to
prove it. Yeah. So I'm not here to minimize your pain,
but I'm not going to let you tell me that
(23:55):
your pain is more important than everybody else. Grow the
fuck up.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
But you know, as you know, and I know, borderline
personality disorder is like really not treatable. Oh I am
not row.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
I can't call the name, but somebody we both love
got that borderline, and it I have to make a
profound decision to let go. Yeah, there's nothing you can
do that. You can't even have a logical conversation because
the disease itself, it ain't nothing wrong with me. Now,
how you're gonna penetrate that? Ever, if there's nothing wrong
(24:30):
and we can't come to the table and at least discuss.
Speaker 3 (24:34):
And I tried to get that person in rehab.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
I did everything, and when it's borderline, there's just nothing
you can do but let that person go and live.
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Yeah, And it's absolutely heartbreaking, you know, especially when it's
somebody close in your life, when it's somebody oh yeah right,
or close to your your intimate circle of people. And
I have found that no matter what transpires in my
relationship with her, there's no say, account at her bank, no,
like anything that I've done in the world kind of
(25:06):
to help or try to help or be there, there's
no record of it in her psychic in her mind.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
No.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
So every need none as your fault.
Speaker 3 (25:15):
You always it was your fault, right, I did nothing.
Speaker 2 (25:19):
I did nothing, And you're like, but it's always a
two way street when there's any kind of confrontation or
there's any kind of interaction, it's two way. Yeah anyway.
I'm not going to sit here and try to explain logic.
But what we have to do. If you love that person,
(25:41):
if you truly do love them, right, you gotta let
them go because they'll kill you. They will get killed.
Speaker 1 (25:47):
So true. I just did that, you know, about a
month ago, and I got to tell you, it's the
hardest thing I've ever done. And every day indeed tempted
to reach out again, and I go, well, well, well
stop right, don't participate.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
I look at my friend's picture and I want to
reach out also, And then I look in the mirror
right after that and I say, you want to die?
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Yeah, save yourself, man.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
Because she's going to kill you. Yes, So you want
to invite that back into your life. Then you add,
on top of everything that you have to struggle with,
all of your challenges and all the challenges I already have.
Can you carry that?
Speaker 1 (26:28):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (26:29):
Hey, how heavy is that luggage? Missus Lewis?
Speaker 1 (26:33):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (26:33):
Wait a minute, add sixty six right hey, And once again,
if you have developed oh girl, this is so deep.
If you really do have that magical wisdom if you've
actually looked in the mirror and say, oh my god,
I've grown up and I care not only about the
(26:55):
people I love, I care about the world. Yes, if
you can reach a point to that where in you
can you invite somebody back to destroy everything you've worked for,
because they will destroy it because your heart is so vulnerable, right,
they will find that place and go stab here' stab
(27:18):
a root. Yeah you go take this knife, Take this knife,
you take this knife. Let me get a bigger one.
Speaker 1 (27:24):
Yeah, here, I'm back for some more.
Speaker 3 (27:26):
Here I am yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
Come on.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
It's too hard, man, it's too hard. Did your mania
have epichies? Like I've read about people who, you know,
they wake up and they're in another country and they
or they've spent all their money or you know, did
you have No.
Speaker 2 (27:42):
I never got that bad. Yeah, I never got that bad.
I was always conscious of the mania, unable to stop it.
But I will say this, I don't think I've ever
said this before. I was basically a good girl. I
was a good girl, and I wasn't out there to
hurt anybody. I didn't want to hurt anybody. I always thought,
(28:06):
you know, My karma was instant. If I actually raged
at someone, I'd walk right outside and trip and fall
and bust my lip. If I kicked a piece of furniture,
I would, you know, turn my ankle. So I learned
pretty early that you only hurt yourself when you do that.
I'm not saying I could control it every time, but
(28:30):
I will say this.
Speaker 3 (28:31):
This is real talk. There wasn't a time in my
life that I raged at someone and didn't say I
was sorry, and I meant it. I meant it. I
meant it. And I told my friend that same for it.
Speaker 2 (28:47):
One time I had raged and I apologized and she said, no,
I don't accept it. And I said, very clearly, well,
I'm going upstairs and I'm going to go to sleep,
and I am going to sleep well with peace of mind,
because I know when I say I'm sorry, I mean
(29:07):
it right. So you go do what you gotta do.
But I'm going to sleep and I'm going to sleep
peacefully because I know who I am right, and I
know that something deep inside of me did not mean
to go that far right. And I knew I was
my polar it. I knew, yeah, yeah, but you know,
look when you got personalities like you and me. That
(29:30):
personality is going to break through that medication. Sometimes. Yes,
I'm sorry, we.
Speaker 3 (29:35):
Are right alpha women, Yep, that's right.
Speaker 2 (29:37):
I'm like, bitch, I'll say to somebody in a minute, Hey,
it ain't if I was on a drip, bitch, it
ain't that much medication in the world that's gonna stop
this personality from coming through.
Speaker 1 (29:51):
Sometimes I totally hear you.
Speaker 3 (29:53):
So basically, I'm telling you you've been warned.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
Back the fuck up right, I'm alpha, And if you, you know,
approach with cau shit or don't come in here right.
Believe me. I'm not gonna come for you because I
ain't got time. But if you coming over here, because
I know, I got a lot of joy in my life.
My book is called Walking in My Joy. I'm not
(30:16):
gonna leave a boutique a grocery store for that matter,
let alone a meeting or a party and not have
everybody laughing before.
Speaker 3 (30:24):
I need the fucking role before.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
The drinks are served.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Honey, you did it before the odd dirvs.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
Come on you. You are the light of every party
and everything you're in.
Speaker 2 (30:36):
Honey, you are Look I'm coming in, Yeah, don't invite me,
or don't hire me, bitch, because yeah, I'm gonna steal
the motherfucking sing. Don't even think somebody's looking at you
if I'm in a SA Now, why is that, miss Lewis?
Speaker 3 (30:50):
Why is that? Because I was gifted?
Speaker 2 (30:53):
Bitch?
Speaker 3 (30:53):
I came out singing Ethel Mormid, right.
Speaker 2 (30:56):
You understand? So I can't stop that. I tell people, well,
not even me can stop me. So you might want
to back the fuck up. This is what's coming to
the table. And have I had to deal with that?
Have I had to deal with working with really a
list of people and they snuffed my shit out? Of
(31:16):
course I've had to deal with that. Have I had
to deal with people showing up and doing Jennifer Lewis absolutely,
even for that matter, stilling material from my One Woman shows.
Speaker 1 (31:29):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
But my dean of students at my university, I went
in her offices and I was crying. I said, my
girlfriend sharing every time I do something, she comes out
on stages, she does it.
Speaker 3 (31:42):
And my dean of students said this to me.
Speaker 2 (31:44):
This has carried me from being hurt in this business,
having been treated like a stepchild because people are intimidated
by my talent. I know that comes real well, she
said to me in that office and really carried me
through life. She said, Jennifer, you uh, don't get too upset,
(32:07):
she said, don't get too upset about that, because I've
known you for three years now and I've seen your
work and by the time somebody has caught onto something
you've done, you've gone on to something new.
Speaker 1 (32:21):
Anyway, I was gonna say, you got ten more in
your back pocket.
Speaker 2 (32:24):
Thank you. So I've been able to weather that storm,
and oh a fucking storm it has been, you see,
because I have been treated like a step child in
this business. Oh I've risen to the top. I mean,
I'll tell a bitch in a minute, yo, bitch, I'm
metched in fucking marble now at Hollywood, and by go
(32:47):
fuck yourself, right, I did it. I got the biggest
one totally, So go on now, you go on, because
I'm cool. And like I said on that day when
I got the star in Hollywood Walk of Fame, everybody
out here knows, am well. I didn't need this to
tell me I was a star, nor to tell you
that I'm a star. But did I earn this, bitch? Yes,
(33:08):
everybody knows that too. Yes, let's celebrate. This is a
beautiful day. And I was very grateful, and believe it
or not, a little humility was thrown in there. I
don't know much about that but that word.
Speaker 3 (33:20):
But you don't need to.
Speaker 1 (33:27):
Hey, I found out something about you while I was
doing a little research, even though I didn't have to
read anything because I knew, but there was a fact
I did not know that you played Fie white Oh
in the read through of dream Girls for Michael Bennett.
Speaker 3 (33:42):
Wasn't only to read through, it was the workshop itself.
Speaker 2 (33:45):
Actually, at that point they had fired Jennifer Holiday and
they brought me in, the actress, to develop the role.
I did a six week workshop with Loretta and Cheryl
and all of the cast, Harney and over Baba Tunde.
We were all there. We were kids and I could sing, yes,
(34:06):
but nobody could sing like that girl. So they used
me the actress to develop the role and then hired
her back. And at that time, you know, I didn't
know the show was going to be the big hit
that it did, so I didn't care. I was getting
ready to go out on a national tour with You
be another Broadway show I had done, and what was
brilliant about Michael bidnett Is. He started that whole thing
(34:30):
about workshops before the show went into rehearsal for Broadway.
The contract was that if you were in one of
the workshops and contributed your talent to the development of
the show, if the show went to Broadway, you would
get paid a percentage Wow throughout the run. So I
(34:51):
never stepped foot on this Broadway stage to play Ethie,
but I was pecky throughout the run.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
Wow, how about that?
Speaker 2 (34:58):
So that was quite the And like I said, I
didn't know it was going to be the hit that
it was. So when they said they were going to
hire Jennifer, I was like, Okay, hey, Rosie. Until I
came back to town and saw that fucking billboard of
Sheryl and Loretta and all them standing there like this
with these mouths. I went all fuck. But you know, look,
I had my triumphs, I had my losses, and it's
(35:23):
just wonderful to grow up and realize that once you've
owned something, you can't lose it. Now, once you've looked
through a door, you can't pretend you didn't see what
was on the other side. Right, So, like I said,
it's the magical wisdom that is the prize. Who knew
(35:45):
it was coming, Who knew it would be this comforting? Yes,
to wake up and not be afraid to face the day. Yeah,
to have done the work and be able to trust
yourself walking into any room beautiful, you know, because you
bring the glory and the Hallelujah with you. You know,
(36:07):
you bring it into the room because you trust who
you are, because you know you live on purpose, and
you wrote down this morning what the fuck you were
gonna do today.
Speaker 3 (36:20):
I'm in charge of this, bitch.
Speaker 2 (36:21):
Yes, Like you know, I'm going through something right now,
and depression will kind of inch in, it will start
to inch. I was like, oh man, I gotta deal
with Hey, get the fuck out, Jenny, right, Jenny, Jenny, Jenny,
Oh no, you won't. But one thing, Rosie too. I
guess it's like anything else you practice. I actually am
(36:43):
finding that I am incapable of going into depression. Wow,
it doesn't register anymore. I'm like, oh, no, bitch, you
might want to go once you learn to balance your
life with the bad shit that's going on. You got
to come over here and you got to look at
(37:04):
some mountains. Bitch, yes, you gotta go and hug a
fucking tree if.
Speaker 1 (37:09):
You got to get in nature.
Speaker 2 (37:10):
Man.
Speaker 1 (37:11):
Yeah, you know it's funny. I moved to the beach
here in Malibu about six months ago, and yeah, I
always would I lived here, you know, wanted to be
near the beach, but I just never did it. And
so Tran Dresser has a place here. And for thirty
years I've been going to a place going I would
love to live like this. And I turned sixty and
I call my brother who does my money, and I go, Tim,
(37:31):
I'm going to rent a house that's very expensive in
Malibu for one year. And I've been here and it's
changed so much in my life and world about my
own depression, my own joy of life, my own journey
that I you know now is the lease is coming
up and I'm looking at the prices, and you know,
(37:51):
I would give this money away in a minute without
thinking about it. But will I spend it on me
and my own happiness?
Speaker 2 (37:58):
Hello?
Speaker 1 (37:59):
Hello?
Speaker 2 (37:59):
Yeah? I tell people, roh, human beings have one job
and one job only self care. Yes, And when you
do that, your arms will be strong when the people
you love for yes, and that includes communities, charities all
(38:20):
of it. One thing you have to understand when tragic
things happen in your life. The first piece is to balance,
who were you before the shit happened? Okay? Or you
taking responsibility at least some of the responsibility for it happening. Yes,
come on now, oh, I created this great job, but
(38:40):
did you create this?
Speaker 1 (38:42):
Right?
Speaker 3 (38:43):
Take some responsibility?
Speaker 1 (38:44):
Right, you create everything?
Speaker 2 (38:46):
So come on, hey, right, hey, So you take responsibility
and then you balance. And then I got to change
my password because I'm getting I'm getting ready to tell
everybody what my password is. Okay, password is. I got up, bitches.
I got up bitches.
Speaker 1 (39:05):
That's a good one, man, that is a good one.
Mine for years was be still. Oh, because my desire
to confront all the wrongs and stand up for the
underdog and help every poor kid and save all.
Speaker 3 (39:20):
The abuse kids.
Speaker 1 (39:21):
It's too much. And I just had to tell myself
be still. So every time I signed in, that was
what I was doing. Be still. Okay, let me center myself.
Speaker 2 (39:30):
What I did too? So oft what I did too. Yes,
we have these great careers and all we want to
do is give back, and that is certainly what I do.
But I'm going to be honest with you. I take
care of Jennifer Lewis first, I really do. I take
care of myself first. The kids got this thing on
the internet where I say, I get up every morning,
(39:54):
I brush my teeth, I spin it out. I leaned
forward and look in the mirror. I pause, and I say,
pretty bitch, and then I go on my way.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
Then I go, I love you so much. Can I
tell you how wonderful the show is. I love this
for you. Oh my god, honey, what a little gem,
what a perfect little character study. You're wonderful in it.
All the women are amazing. One of my favorite shows.
And I heard it just got picked up right.
Speaker 3 (40:27):
Well, now, we don't know yet.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
You may know something I don't know.
Speaker 1 (40:30):
I heard from an actress on the show that there
is really yes, I did.
Speaker 3 (40:35):
Well, I have not heard yet.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
And you know I don't go skipping and jumping for
joy to that fucking contracted signed But am I enjoying?
First of all, let me just say that Vanessa Bayer
and Molly Shannon that mattered the whole cast. I am
in an environment now, and as I know, you know,
this is my best work. Yes, playing Patricia, I would
(40:57):
claim is my best work.
Speaker 1 (41:00):
It's beautiful.
Speaker 2 (41:01):
But I am in an environment where I can create
like that.
Speaker 1 (41:05):
Yes, makes all the difference.
Speaker 3 (41:07):
Oh my god. Molly Shannon and Vanessa Bear.
Speaker 1 (41:12):
Too good too. Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (41:14):
I have to say I have to say to Vanessa
Bear every episode I have to look at it, go
what Especially when I first got there, I.
Speaker 3 (41:21):
Go, what the fuck are you doing?
Speaker 1 (41:23):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (41:23):
Yeah, why did you just bite the air?
Speaker 1 (41:28):
Right?
Speaker 3 (41:29):
Who bites the air?
Speaker 2 (41:30):
That was Vanessa? Yeah, Vanansa and Platricia, my character has
this of course, stand there.
Speaker 3 (41:38):
And be the bitch that she is.
Speaker 2 (41:40):
Right, And I got Vanantha squeaking her pants.
Speaker 3 (41:43):
I got her doing all these other things. Oh my god, hilarious.
Speaker 2 (41:48):
I live for both.
Speaker 4 (41:49):
You know.
Speaker 1 (41:49):
I wasn't familiar with Vanessa's work. I really wasn't.
Speaker 2 (41:52):
And I wasn't either.
Speaker 3 (41:53):
We grew up with Molly.
Speaker 1 (41:54):
Yes, Molly, I knew everything and love everything, And I
was like, who's this other girl?
Speaker 2 (42:00):
She's unbelievable, she's so good. Molly is Oh, Jennifer, let's
massage the scene. Now.
Speaker 3 (42:09):
I'm like, here, come this bitch. I'm fifty.
Speaker 2 (42:12):
I can kick the same bitch that tongue catched the
tree and fell into uh chairs with Whitney Hilstones.
Speaker 3 (42:21):
When they called me Rosie.
Speaker 2 (42:23):
When they called me because I just finished eight years
on Blackish, right, would y'all leave me alone? But they
called me and said Molly Shannon, I said, bitch, you
had me at Hello. Yes, because it's nothing else. I know,
I'm gonna have fun and guests. Who was on the
Zoo WHUSA executive producer and creator saw the show. Vanessa
(42:47):
bed so I had no idea. Oh she was really
I've seen her work and and then you know and
say a night live. But we, like I said, we
grew up with Molly. And Vanessa's sitting there and I'm going, oh,
Molly shared it. Yeah, you have be in lo with
s and Vanessa and I joke about it all the time.
She said, I just sat there and thought she hates me,
(43:10):
but she's so good I still want to hire her.
Speaker 1 (43:15):
Well, she's a smart woman to cast all you and
the writing and best armstrong as her mom is just
I love to see.
Speaker 2 (43:24):
Her in mad Rogers, all of the ball of the fantastic,
I mean, and like I said, the best thing about
it is, we have created an environment in order to
give you guys like you said this gym. I love
that thing.
Speaker 1 (43:39):
I agree, gem of a show. Listen, Honey, I love
you and I could talk to you over and over
and over. I love you, love you soank you so much.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
All Right, Pumpkin.
Speaker 1 (43:47):
Jis so the same. Lois Lewis. Hey, We're about to
(44:11):
answer some of the questions that you our listeners have
sent in. You just record a voice memo on your
phone and then send it to Onward Rosie at gmail
dot com, and we will answer your question if we
see fit. Take it away. Who's the first question?
Speaker 4 (44:30):
Hi Rosey. My name is Matt Curry and I live
in Nova Scotia, Canada. Hi Matt Curry, thank you so
much for bringing this podcast to life. I'm so delighted
to have you back in my kitchen again and listening
to the interesting conversations that you're having so far. My
question is, what is the biggest misunderstanding about you?
Speaker 1 (44:54):
I think the biggest misunderstanding about me, Matt, is that
I'm tough. I have like a cadence and a kind
of continents of sort of being a tough New York girl,
you know. And when people get to meet me and
they have not met me before, They're like, I can't
believe what is softer you are? You know, I really am,
(45:14):
like I cry kind of often. I am very mushy,
I'm very emotional, and I'm not really all that tough,
although I do stand up for what I believe in.
But I think the biggest misconception is that I'm a toughie,
and frankly, I ain't all right. We got another one
coming up? Who we got next?
Speaker 5 (45:35):
Hello, Rosie. I'm Sandra and doctor Sandstorm on TikTok. I
wanted to congratulate you on your new podcast. I just
listened to it on a walk and it was just
so refreshing to hear you and Sharon talking about how
you visualized your futures and they came to pass. And
(45:58):
I just wanted to ask you a question. Knowing that
we do this, we visualize.
Speaker 6 (46:04):
Our futures and we manifest them, I wonder what you
think about all of the attention that we pay to
the negativities in our environment and what's going on in
our world. I'm the mother of a trans daughter and
I worry about her every day, and I have to
keep up on what's going on in the politics of
(46:26):
our country. And yet sometimes I feel like by focusing
on it, I'm bringing about more and I wonder what
your thoughts.
Speaker 1 (46:34):
Are on that. Wow, well that's a fascinating conversation. I
think my first thought, of course, would be to get
as much information as I could to keep my daughter safe.
And I also realized at the same time how overwhelming
that can be, especially now with the Republican led organized
(46:55):
attack on the LBGTA community, and it's terrifying what's happening
to trans people. It's terrifying how they're trying to use
us once again as a voting wedge, as as something
that they can use to anger and discredit and and
shame people and oftentimes get them killed. You know, I
(47:21):
think that we do give power to things and then
we can manifest them by thinking them. You know, I
think therefore I am. I mean, I do believe that
we choose and manifest our life as we as we
live it. And and the balance that we need to
(47:43):
find between information and instinct, between caring and coverage. You know,
that's a balance that we all have to struggle with
and find out how to make that work in our life. Hey,
thank you all for tuning in. Please leave me a
voice if you can. Next week on this podcast Onward
(48:04):
with Rosi o donald. I almost call it a blog
every day, that's how old I am. It's not a blog, people,
it's a podcast. Next week is Dylan mulvaney, who's a
wonderful young woman that you probably know from TikTok, who
filmed her transition and filmed a year of her life
as she transitioned from male to female. And she's a
(48:25):
wonderful young woman and we had a very interesting conversation.
She's the age of my elder children, and I feel
like a parent to her. I feel like, you know,
like a mom. And I was curious about things I
didn't understand and she definitely helped me. And all of
that comes out next week on Onward with Rosie o'
(48:48):
donald Dylan mulvany, So don't miss that. So thank you
all very much and peace out.
Well, hey everybody, it's me Rosie O'Donnell. How are you.
I'm good, I'm good boy. It's been one hell of
a week.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Huh.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
You know the thing about podcasts is they're not live,
so we record them as close to the drop date
as we can. But things happen in the world, and
you know, today I think what I'm still thinking of
and what has rocked my soul, and once again, you know,
open the Columbine wound that happened to all of us
(00:42):
with it being pretty much the first huge school shooting
that we all remember April twentieth, nineteen ninety nine, and
it brings me back to this latest school shooting in Nashville,
where three children and three adults were killed, and you know,
it overwhelms me. I don't understand how this keeps happening
(01:06):
in our country and how senators and congress people feel
like it's okay to say on the news the day
after this horror that nothing can be done. How is
that possible? Nothing can be done? I'm sick of hearing it,
and I think a vast majority of Americans are too.
(01:29):
We need to ban assault weapons, and I wrote that
on my TikTok and people wrote in oh my second Amendment, right, well,
let's amend the amendment. Then I think that automatic weapons,
assault rifles weapons of war. Sorry, civilians cannot have them.
(01:49):
And that's the point where we're at, you know. I
remember talking to Rory Kennedy last week and her telling
me that the top scientists in the world say we
could have six maybe ten years before it's not fixable
what we've done to the climate. And we're in an
emergency and not fixable, right, what's going to happen? I mean,
(02:15):
you can't just pretend you don't see these things. Wilful
blindness is going to end up ruining the earth, you know.
And we have wilful blindness in this country about assault weapons.
And when we had an assault weapon ban, there were
much less school shootings. You know, the statistics, everybody can
(02:37):
look them up. We've known them for too long.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
You know.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
You got to stand up and force our representatives to
speak for the people. You can't love guns more than
you love kids. Really sad, really hard, and it's really
hard to keep fighting the same fight. I remember when
I spoke out after Columbine to Tom Sellek, who then
(03:05):
was a representative of the NRA. You know, it was
a big controversy. How could you say that? How could
we not have said it? Look, what's happened since a
thousand school shootings, since Columbine in America. It's crazy, it's crazy,
(03:26):
and we can't live this way, and we have to
stand up and say it. You know, I've been trying
not to listen to the news because what's going on
in Israel and the streets and them fighting against net
and Yahoo, and in France the fights and the protests
against Macron who wants to change the retirement age by
two years. And you know, I saw some photos, some
(03:49):
video of people eating in a French bistro and outside
trash cans, on fire, road blockades, people eating, Just you know,
what's happened to our world? Very very sad. Really is
well now that I brought the show to a complete
halt and nobody wants to listen. We have a great
(04:10):
guest today, we really do. And we talk a little
bit about mental health. We talk a little bit about Columbine,
which you know started me on my journey and medication
of medication of my mental health issues, and I am
so incredibly grateful. But the guest is Jennifer Lewis. Jennifer Lewis,
(04:30):
who is one of the most talented people I have
ever met in my life. I saw her in nineteen
ninety four in her one woman show, The Diva Is Dismissed,
and I was like, I'm in love with her. I'm
in love with her. I met her then, but before then,
before then, I knew who she was because I saw
Bet Miller in concerts so many times that I could
(04:52):
recognize her backup singers when they weren't with her, you know,
I mean, that's a whole different gig. You know, I
was doing a game show and well, we tell the
story in it. But she's here today, and she has
written two books, The Mother of Black Hollywood and Walking
in My Joy in the Streets. You know, she's amazing
(05:15):
and I love her philosophy of life. I love her
perspective of the world. I love her ability to have
self insight, and I love the way she carries herself.
I really do. Years and years ago, maybe thirty years ago,
we all were in Laguna to see Bette Midler and
(05:37):
Jennifer was performing with Bet, I believe at that time,
and she was there with Mark Shaman and me and
a bunch of people. I saw them right after they
came back, and they were all singing the song that
Jennifer made up when she was in Laguna because she
got there and she was the only black person that
she saw in the whole entire town. So she made
(05:57):
up this song that goes something like this, Hey what folks,
I'm sorry I could not get here soon. I'm the
only black girl in Lagoona And we would sing it
over and over and over. So this interview has no
beginning because we just jump in right. She sees me
(06:20):
on the FaceTime thing and I see her and we're going,
you know, we start talking the words to hey, white girl,
I'm sorry I could not get here sooner, but we
never explain what it is. So there is a little
explanation about your little song. You're gonna hear us do
a little staccato version of Anyway, she's here and we're
talking about everything, and I just adore her, and I
(06:42):
know that you will too. So fair warning, there's a
lot of cursing in this episode because when she and
I sit around, that's what we do. So you might
not want to listen at work or else. Put your
headphones on. I mean, it's not like so much cursing
that you're watching, you know, like a Tarantino film, but
there's enough curse saying that you could get in trouble
by someone saying, what the fuck are you listening to?
(07:03):
You know what I'm saying. This is Onward with Rosie O'Donnell,
and this is episode three.
Speaker 3 (07:21):
Oh honey, hi baby, how are you?
Speaker 2 (07:24):
Oh girl? So much shit is going on?
Speaker 1 (07:27):
What's going down?
Speaker 2 (07:28):
What's going down? I'm gonna tell you all the good shit?
Speaker 1 (07:31):
All right?
Speaker 3 (07:32):
Hey wife, folks, I'm sorry, bitches.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
I could not be here sooner. You're the only black
girl in Laguna.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Only motherfucker.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Oh my, how long ago was that, Jennifer Lewis? That
must have been a good thirty years ago.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
It had to be thirty.
Speaker 1 (07:50):
Yes, we've known each other a long time.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Oh my god, Roro.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
Do you remember the first time we met? Where it
was Mark Davis? Nope, it was on the talk show
Third Degree? Do you remember that you and Charlowe were
trying to get us to guess on the Burt Convy
hosted Third Degree, a very short lived game show, And
(08:18):
I looked at you and went, oh my god, those
are the horless. And I said to the person next
to me, I think I have to disqualify myself. I
know exactly the.
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Tye.
Speaker 1 (08:31):
What's my line? Exactly?
Speaker 2 (08:33):
What's my life? Who is that bitch? Two loud singing
wars on a game show trying to hide who they are?
Speaker 1 (08:41):
Exactly?
Speaker 2 (08:42):
Let's hall it. I actually just got some flowers from bed.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
Oh how nice.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
Yeah, she sent me for the star on the Hollywood
Walk of Fans.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
And how exciting was that? Jennifer Lewis.
Speaker 2 (08:52):
It was a perfect day. Yeah, I mean it went
off without a hitch, and I was so happy. I
wore the yellow because I looked like a bird of paradise.
Speaker 1 (09:02):
You look beautiful.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
I just yeah, And I was telling the kids to
vote that shit went vorrow. I was very happy about that.
Debbie Allen and Mark Shaman showed up. It was It
was the perfect day. And I knew you and Kathy
were working that day, so I didn't want to bother
the y'all. Maybe y'all were working.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
Well, we would always show up for you. Are you kidding?
We are in our sixties now, dol. How does that feel?
Speaker 2 (09:27):
I just turned sixty six? You know what?
Speaker 1 (09:30):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (09:31):
It feels fucking good.
Speaker 1 (09:33):
I think so too.
Speaker 3 (09:34):
What happens is the.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
Magic of wisdom reveals itself.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
I agree.
Speaker 3 (09:43):
I mean so so little stresses me out.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
Now.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
I'm like, taxi, bitch, get the fuck out of here
with that.
Speaker 1 (09:49):
Yes, I mean really you saw come on, drop all
the shit that didn't work when you ate your sixties,
and then you're like onward into whatever comes next. Because
we're in that final third. Honey.
Speaker 2 (10:00):
Absolutely, we're in.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
That last thirty years. If we're lucky, you know.
Speaker 2 (10:05):
And you know you know what I tell people, So
I said, listen very carefully. I got about thirty summers.
You don't get one. They're mine.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (10:16):
I love that. I love that I know more of
who I am and I like that girl, right, It's
one thing to walk around to me.
Speaker 3 (10:24):
I love myself. No, fuck you, bitch, Do you like yourself?
Speaker 2 (10:29):
I like me?
Speaker 1 (10:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
I just got back from Africa and I was standing
at the tip of the Motherland with those waves pounding
on those ancient stones out there, and I stood there
and I said it out loud, I said, I like me,
go get them Jenny. Yes, it's that Jenny, not that Jennifer.
(10:52):
Motherfucking Lewis. I'm talking about that Jenny.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
That little girl in Saint Louis.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
Absolutely of the Saint Louis Lewis's only you can say
that's right.
Speaker 1 (11:03):
And I never forgot it when you open your shirt
with that Oh my god, in love with this woman.
What am I gonna do? Right?
Speaker 2 (11:10):
You did?
Speaker 3 (11:11):
You loved me, You loved me from the start.
Speaker 1 (11:14):
Well, honey, you're so spectacular. It's hard to keep your
eyes off you. You steal every show you're in, every movie,
every part you like. I'm like, fucking, there's Jennifer Lewis again.
Speaker 2 (11:24):
You know.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
And you kept going and going and going and going,
and I'm so proud of all your accomplishments. And black
at you, I mean really, honey.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
Black at you, baby, black at you. I've seen you
in your dramatic acting work. You're so good. I just
sit here and go, there's my baby. Ah, girl, there's
my baby doing it all. Funny girl, dramatic girl, good
human being, honest. It's that honesty that excites me more
(11:53):
than anything.
Speaker 1 (11:53):
Same with me.
Speaker 2 (11:54):
I tell people, Yeah, I tell people, bitch, there's no
shortcut to greatness. No, you gotta overturn every stone you
don't get to skip around the truth. That's why they
say the truth, the old truth, nothing but the truth. Yes, indeed,
so I admire that in you. I really do. Just
just they call it down to earth, but it's it's
(12:16):
more powerful than that. It's being in the.
Speaker 1 (12:18):
Moment, the moment present.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
So true. Yeah, so important.
Speaker 1 (12:24):
And you know the things that I couldn't stop from
little Row when I was a kid, to big Row
now is the need to always tell what was happening
in my life. And you know, I think it comes
from a childhood of abuse. It comes from having to
be hyper sensitive to what people's moods are, you know,
(12:46):
and then trying to figure out my own in the
midst of that.
Speaker 3 (12:50):
Yeah, where's that shoe coming from?
Speaker 2 (12:52):
Yes, where's that shoe from?
Speaker 1 (12:53):
Mama?
Speaker 2 (12:53):
Coming from? Shoe? You don't even know what it's you now,
and I gotta tell you Roe all Oh god, I'm
so excited to even say this. I feel so free
in my life, not bound by waiting for somebody to
let me know if I got the gig. You see.
Sure it's been a while since that kind of shit,
since our audition for anything, but back in the day,
(13:16):
coming up with that do they want me? Am I
good enough? I actually had a step up on them.
Though I knew I had a gift, they couldn't really
fuck with me. I would walk into an audition room
and see all of them sitting on the toilet, right,
you see, So I wasn't fucking intimidated. But the point
I want to make about that honesty is I have
(13:39):
no secrets. I gave them all up in the two
books I've written, which are beautiful. Yeah, here it is, bitches.
Here's the molestation, here's the sex addiction, Here's the bipolar disorder.
Here it all is laid down on the paper. Take
it and run with it. Because once you read all
that shit, all you got to do is come back
(13:59):
to me. And all I can tell you is look
at me now, right right, no stone overturned. You know,
I swim downstream. I don't have to go upstream anymore, right,
And you know.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
It is so freeing. That's exactly the word that I
would use. Like something changed at fifty. It didn't bother me.
I didn't think anything of it, but something about sixty,
Like in my mind, the people who are sixty are
like Vivian Vance, you know, yeah, say to Thompson from family,
like those people are all sixty and now I'm one
of them.
Speaker 2 (14:30):
You know, right, And and I remember my great aunts
when they were in their sixties, how they had so
many health issues. Right, And you know you can live
long now if you take care of yourself. We know
how now, how to eat. We know we have to
get up and move our bodies. We know we have
to be honest. Going back to that, keep the stress off.
(14:52):
It's stress that causes all these diseases. You know, when
you are in fact dis ease. Now, how do you
fuck with that? You keep people away from you that
are trying to quatch your joy? Yes, I mean that
is that is a real thing because you know me,
when I get up, I get up skipping. Yes, I'll
(15:13):
wake the fuck up and skip by the big Come on, bitch,
just bring a day.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
Yes, fucking sun is up and you know, and then
you drop down to a full split with no problem.
I've seen you do it, girl, I've seen you do
it girl.
Speaker 3 (15:29):
You know I've always been athletic.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
You know, I played racquetball, softball, did pilates for damn
near thirty years. Yoga Yoga was real important to to
center myself, you know, especially with the bipolar disorder, right,
the mania and the depression. And I tell people, you know,
once she the first thirty five years of my life,
I was depressed. I didn't really know it. Shit, I
(15:53):
just thought everybody cried at night. Shit, right, you know,
living in the world, that's you know that you just
break the fuck down. What was that movie with Holly
Hunter or she would just break the fuck down? An
old movie.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
Broadcast about But yes, yes, I.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
Remember when I first saw that, I was like, oh
that's how I am.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Yeah, breaked out a fucking aunt go across the street.
Oh look at that poor aunt.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
Right, And you know, it's just it was lightly right.
So when I was diagnosed, I really wanted to I
was like, God, damn, that does describe me.
Speaker 1 (16:30):
Hey, don't go away, We'll be right back with more.
Jennifer Lewis, it was nineteen ninety when you got diagnosed
(16:56):
and had your life become unmanageable, that you finally went
to get a diagnosis, or had you always been in therapy.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
No, it was the height of the AIDS epidemic. I
felt I fell apart, girl, I mean, I found myself
on the floor screaming, and just so happens. A girlfriend
that I really respected, she said to me, Jennifer, you
got to get some help.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
I'm like, bitch, I'm Jennifer Little. There's only no fucking help.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
But when all of my friends started dying like that,
I knew something was wrong. I would go to auditions
and literally fall apart. I remember auditioning for thirty something
and Peter Wharton looking at me and said, what's wrong.
You can do this. I've seen your work just fell apart.
And it was when that started happening, I was like, Okay,
(17:43):
time to do something, and I got in therapy. The
first two years, she was just a captive audience.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
Yeah, I mean I know exactly that feeling.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
Yeah. She she would ask me, Jennifer, why do you performing? Yeah,
I'm like, no, bitch, this is what's going on.
Speaker 1 (17:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
So, when you thought to get to those real feelings
that are really deep in your soul from the childhood
abuse and the acting out so many years and running, running, running, right,
you just find out you're going to meet yourself when
you get there.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
So, now, when they told you the diagnosis, because when
I got diagnosed with severe depression, it was right after
Columbine and I had this two little babies, and I
was waking up every night thinking somebody was in my
house with a gun, that kids were going to be
killed in schools. I couldn't I couldn't fathom how this
was happening in my world, and it caused me such duress.
(18:39):
I couldn't sleep and I couldn't eat, I couldn't stop crying.
I could hardly do my show without like squeezing all
my muscles to try to stop myself from having feelings.
And so this doctor said to me, you're going to
go on these medicines. You're severe panic, you have severe PhD,
you have severe you know, a depression like I've never seen,
(18:59):
and you need to be medicated. And I said okay,
because I was in a mess. And I said how
long am I going to have to take these? And
she said the rest of your life? And I was like, okay,
I get it.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
Yeah, you know I've been medicated for now about thirty
five years.
Speaker 1 (19:15):
I would say, yeah for me since ninety nine.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
Yeah, I get up every morning, I take three pills
and I go in about my business. You know, ain't
no shame in my game. Bring it come on, y'all,
let's get it together. This shit is real. Yes, I
mean you can't believe it at first. You're like, oh, honey,
I can't get on that shit. That shit's going to
take my edge, right. Well, no, it didn't take my edge.
(19:38):
It put me in a place where a level. I
wasn't high high, and I wasn't low low, right. I
was in a level place where I could enjoy my life,
enjoy my success.
Speaker 3 (19:49):
So I still I take care of myself.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
I managed, and all I can say is that, you know,
look at me now, bitches exactly.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
I still got a big old smile on my face.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
No you do anything from you. Jennifer Lewis, I was
very moved during the height of Kanye's severe mental issue
trauma that he's going through that you really reached out
in a beautiful way. I saw you on a bunch
of interviews and you know, you're like, call me, call
me kid, And I kind of felt the same way.
You know, I was like, yeah, I wish I could
(20:23):
reach him, you know all of it. It seemed to
me that I know he had a traumatic brain injury
when he got in that car accident before he was
known and who was living with his mom, and then
I think when he lost his mom, something just shattered
inside of him.
Speaker 2 (20:37):
You know, you know, mental illness is one thing, but
I'm not, certainly not saying Kanye is evil by any means.
I just know a lot of people that are borderline
personality disorder.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
Mecho.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
There's a meanness that comes with it, and I'm like,
you know what, that's unacceptable. I'm bipolar and I can
be mean. Okay, maybe three times a year, okay, maybe four,
but come on, cruel. I mean waking up and saying,
you know, I'm going deaf Khan five on the Jews, No, hey, hey, hey,
come here, come here? Hey yeah hey, yes, you know,
(21:13):
we got people down south with torches going. The Jews
will not replace me. We don't need that bullshit. What
you want to start with all those followers a silvil war?
Speaker 1 (21:22):
Right?
Speaker 3 (21:23):
The fuck is.
Speaker 2 (21:23):
Wrong with you? Shut the fuck up? And I meant
that because I was mad. But the the undercurrent of
that is the undercurrent of that is Kanye, come here, yes,
come here, pup it, come here. And you know my
(21:46):
name is Jennifer Lewis, and I understand what you're going.
Speaker 1 (21:49):
Through totally you're not alone.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
But you cannot if they're not ready, There's nothing you
can do. There's nothing you can do. There's nothing you
can do. Yeah, poor Babby, he's gonna I just hope
that he that he can find his way. I really do,
because he means a lot to a lot of people. Yes,
he has a huge following. These kids listen to him.
(22:14):
They're very protective of him. I've certainly found that out.
When I tell him to shut the fuck, they're like Auntie,
back off Kanye. My response to them with no, go
fuck yourself right. That baby's got some issues, and how
about you go take care of yours right, And don't
roll up on me, bitch, because I.
Speaker 3 (22:30):
Know who I am exactly. Hey, y'all can't drag me.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
No, I've been fighting out here for you for a
ten thousand years. Whether it was breast cancer, whether it
was AIDS, whether it was the community. I don't care
what it is, civil rights. I know who I am.
Don't come for me, right, Don't come.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
For me, especially because you know you tend to mother everyone,
the mother of black Hollywood that you are, absolutely and
you know he's an orphan. Absolutely, This little boys sort
of lost in the world alone, is how I look
at him. Everyone goes, why do you look at him
as a little boy. I'm like, I don't know, but
I see the child that he was, and I just.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
That's arrested development. If that's not arrested development as its height,
what is I mean?
Speaker 3 (23:12):
He is a baby.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
He's a baby to us, Yes, and we are here
to say, hey, I've been through it. I know what
you're going through.
Speaker 1 (23:22):
Not come here, let me show you your way out.
Let me show you.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
Come here.
Speaker 2 (23:26):
You said right here, and let me tell you a
thing or two, or for that matters, show you a
thing or two.
Speaker 1 (23:33):
Right here.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
It is in black and white. Here's that scared little girl,
right Here's that baby. Here's that baby that was molested
by the past of her church. Here's another baby that
was abused and beaten and still have the scars to
prove it. Yeah. So I'm not here to minimize your pain,
but I'm not going to let you tell me that
(23:55):
your pain is more important than everybody else. Grow the
fuck up.
Speaker 1 (24:00):
But you know, as you know, and I know, borderline
personality disorder is like really not treatable. Oh I am
not row.
Speaker 2 (24:08):
I can't call the name, but somebody we both love
got that borderline, and it I have to make a
profound decision to let go. Yeah, there's nothing you can
do that. You can't even have a logical conversation because
the disease itself, it ain't nothing wrong with me. Now,
how you're gonna penetrate that? Ever, if there's nothing wrong
(24:30):
and we can't come to the table and at least discuss.
Speaker 3 (24:34):
And I tried to get that person in rehab.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
I did everything, and when it's borderline, there's just nothing
you can do but let that person go and live.
Speaker 1 (24:43):
Yeah, And it's absolutely heartbreaking, you know, especially when it's
somebody close in your life, when it's somebody oh yeah right,
or close to your your intimate circle of people. And
I have found that no matter what transpires in my
relationship with her, there's no say, account at her bank, no,
like anything that I've done in the world kind of
(25:06):
to help or try to help or be there, there's
no record of it in her psychic in her mind.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
No.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
So every need none as your fault.
Speaker 3 (25:15):
You always it was your fault, right, I did nothing.
Speaker 2 (25:19):
I did nothing, And you're like, but it's always a
two way street when there's any kind of confrontation or
there's any kind of interaction, it's two way. Yeah anyway.
I'm not going to sit here and try to explain logic.
But what we have to do. If you love that person,
(25:41):
if you truly do love them, right, you gotta let
them go because they'll kill you. They will get killed.
Speaker 1 (25:47):
So true. I just did that, you know, about a
month ago, and I got to tell you, it's the
hardest thing I've ever done. And every day indeed tempted
to reach out again, and I go, well, well, well
stop right, don't participate.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
I look at my friend's picture and I want to
reach out also, And then I look in the mirror
right after that and I say, you want to die?
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Yeah, save yourself, man.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
Because she's going to kill you. Yes, So you want
to invite that back into your life. Then you add,
on top of everything that you have to struggle with,
all of your challenges and all the challenges I already have.
Can you carry that?
Speaker 1 (26:28):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (26:29):
Hey, how heavy is that luggage? Missus Lewis?
Speaker 1 (26:33):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (26:33):
Wait a minute, add sixty six right hey, And once again,
if you have developed oh girl, this is so deep.
If you really do have that magical wisdom if you've
actually looked in the mirror and say, oh my god,
I've grown up and I care not only about the
(26:55):
people I love, I care about the world. Yes, if
you can reach a point to that where in you
can you invite somebody back to destroy everything you've worked for,
because they will destroy it because your heart is so vulnerable, right,
they will find that place and go stab here' stab
(27:18):
a root. Yeah you go take this knife, Take this knife,
you take this knife. Let me get a bigger one.
Speaker 1 (27:24):
Yeah, here, I'm back for some more.
Speaker 3 (27:26):
Here I am yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
Come on.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
It's too hard, man, it's too hard. Did your mania
have epichies? Like I've read about people who, you know,
they wake up and they're in another country and they
or they've spent all their money or you know, did
you have No.
Speaker 2 (27:42):
I never got that bad. Yeah, I never got that bad.
I was always conscious of the mania, unable to stop it.
But I will say this, I don't think I've ever
said this before. I was basically a good girl. I
was a good girl, and I wasn't out there to
hurt anybody. I didn't want to hurt anybody. I always thought,
(28:06):
you know, My karma was instant. If I actually raged
at someone, I'd walk right outside and trip and fall
and bust my lip. If I kicked a piece of furniture,
I would, you know, turn my ankle. So I learned
pretty early that you only hurt yourself when you do that.
I'm not saying I could control it every time, but
(28:30):
I will say this.
Speaker 3 (28:31):
This is real talk. There wasn't a time in my
life that I raged at someone and didn't say I
was sorry, and I meant it. I meant it. I
meant it. And I told my friend that same for it.
Speaker 2 (28:47):
One time I had raged and I apologized and she said, no,
I don't accept it. And I said, very clearly, well,
I'm going upstairs and I'm going to go to sleep,
and I am going to sleep well with peace of mind,
because I know when I say I'm sorry, I mean
(29:07):
it right. So you go do what you gotta do.
But I'm going to sleep and I'm going to sleep
peacefully because I know who I am right, and I
know that something deep inside of me did not mean
to go that far right. And I knew I was
my polar it. I knew, yeah, yeah, but you know,
look when you got personalities like you and me. That
(29:30):
personality is going to break through that medication. Sometimes. Yes,
I'm sorry, we.
Speaker 3 (29:35):
Are right alpha women, Yep, that's right.
Speaker 2 (29:37):
I'm like, bitch, I'll say to somebody in a minute, Hey,
it ain't if I was on a drip, bitch, it
ain't that much medication in the world that's gonna stop
this personality from coming through.
Speaker 1 (29:51):
Sometimes I totally hear you.
Speaker 3 (29:53):
So basically, I'm telling you you've been warned.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
Back the fuck up right, I'm alpha, And if you, you know,
approach with cau shit or don't come in here right.
Believe me. I'm not gonna come for you because I
ain't got time. But if you coming over here, because
I know, I got a lot of joy in my life.
My book is called Walking in My Joy. I'm not
(30:16):
gonna leave a boutique a grocery store for that matter,
let alone a meeting or a party and not have
everybody laughing before.
Speaker 3 (30:24):
I need the fucking role before.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
The drinks are served.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Honey, you did it before the odd dirvs.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
Come on you. You are the light of every party
and everything you're in.
Speaker 2 (30:36):
Honey, you are Look I'm coming in, Yeah, don't invite me,
or don't hire me, bitch, because yeah, I'm gonna steal
the motherfucking sing. Don't even think somebody's looking at you
if I'm in a SA Now, why is that, miss Lewis?
Speaker 3 (30:50):
Why is that? Because I was gifted?
Speaker 2 (30:53):
Bitch?
Speaker 3 (30:53):
I came out singing Ethel Mormid, right.
Speaker 2 (30:56):
You understand? So I can't stop that. I tell people, well,
not even me can stop me. So you might want
to back the fuck up. This is what's coming to
the table. And have I had to deal with that?
Have I had to deal with working with really a
list of people and they snuffed my shit out? Of
(31:16):
course I've had to deal with that. Have I had
to deal with people showing up and doing Jennifer Lewis absolutely,
even for that matter, stilling material from my One Woman shows.
Speaker 1 (31:29):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (31:29):
But my dean of students at my university, I went
in her offices and I was crying. I said, my
girlfriend sharing every time I do something, she comes out
on stages, she does it.
Speaker 3 (31:42):
And my dean of students said this to me.
Speaker 2 (31:44):
This has carried me from being hurt in this business,
having been treated like a stepchild because people are intimidated
by my talent. I know that comes real well, she
said to me in that office and really carried me
through life. She said, Jennifer, you uh, don't get too upset,
(32:07):
she said, don't get too upset about that, because I've
known you for three years now and I've seen your
work and by the time somebody has caught onto something
you've done, you've gone on to something new.
Speaker 1 (32:21):
Anyway, I was gonna say, you got ten more in
your back pocket.
Speaker 2 (32:24):
Thank you. So I've been able to weather that storm,
and oh a fucking storm it has been, you see,
because I have been treated like a step child in
this business. Oh I've risen to the top. I mean,
I'll tell a bitch in a minute, yo, bitch, I'm
metched in fucking marble now at Hollywood, and by go
(32:47):
fuck yourself, right, I did it. I got the biggest
one totally, So go on now, you go on, because
I'm cool. And like I said on that day when
I got the star in Hollywood Walk of Fame, everybody
out here knows, am well. I didn't need this to
tell me I was a star, nor to tell you
that I'm a star. But did I earn this, bitch? Yes,
(33:08):
everybody knows that too. Yes, let's celebrate. This is a
beautiful day. And I was very grateful, and believe it
or not, a little humility was thrown in there. I
don't know much about that but that word.
Speaker 3 (33:20):
But you don't need to.
Speaker 1 (33:27):
Hey, I found out something about you while I was
doing a little research, even though I didn't have to
read anything because I knew, but there was a fact
I did not know that you played Fie white Oh
in the read through of dream Girls for Michael Bennett.
Speaker 3 (33:42):
Wasn't only to read through, it was the workshop itself.
Speaker 2 (33:45):
Actually, at that point they had fired Jennifer Holiday and
they brought me in, the actress, to develop the role.
I did a six week workshop with Loretta and Cheryl
and all of the cast, Harney and over Baba Tunde.
We were all there. We were kids and I could sing, yes,
(34:06):
but nobody could sing like that girl. So they used
me the actress to develop the role and then hired
her back. And at that time, you know, I didn't
know the show was going to be the big hit
that it did, so I didn't care. I was getting
ready to go out on a national tour with You
be another Broadway show I had done, and what was
brilliant about Michael bidnett Is. He started that whole thing
(34:30):
about workshops before the show went into rehearsal for Broadway.
The contract was that if you were in one of
the workshops and contributed your talent to the development of
the show, if the show went to Broadway, you would
get paid a percentage Wow throughout the run. So I
(34:51):
never stepped foot on this Broadway stage to play Ethie,
but I was pecky throughout the run.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
Wow, how about that?
Speaker 2 (34:58):
So that was quite the And like I said, I
didn't know it was going to be the hit that
it was. So when they said they were going to
hire Jennifer, I was like, Okay, hey, Rosie. Until I
came back to town and saw that fucking billboard of
Sheryl and Loretta and all them standing there like this
with these mouths. I went all fuck. But you know, look,
I had my triumphs, I had my losses, and it's
(35:23):
just wonderful to grow up and realize that once you've
owned something, you can't lose it. Now, once you've looked
through a door, you can't pretend you didn't see what
was on the other side. Right, So, like I said,
it's the magical wisdom that is the prize. Who knew
(35:45):
it was coming, Who knew it would be this comforting? Yes,
to wake up and not be afraid to face the day. Yeah,
to have done the work and be able to trust
yourself walking into any room beautiful, you know, because you
bring the glory and the Hallelujah with you. You know,
(36:07):
you bring it into the room because you trust who
you are, because you know you live on purpose, and
you wrote down this morning what the fuck you were
gonna do today.
Speaker 3 (36:20):
I'm in charge of this, bitch.
Speaker 2 (36:21):
Yes, Like you know, I'm going through something right now,
and depression will kind of inch in, it will start
to inch. I was like, oh man, I gotta deal
with Hey, get the fuck out, Jenny, right, Jenny, Jenny, Jenny,
Oh no, you won't. But one thing, Rosie too. I
guess it's like anything else you practice. I actually am
(36:43):
finding that I am incapable of going into depression. Wow,
it doesn't register anymore. I'm like, oh, no, bitch, you
might want to go once you learn to balance your
life with the bad shit that's going on. You got
to come over here and you got to look at
(37:04):
some mountains. Bitch, yes, you gotta go and hug a
fucking tree if.
Speaker 1 (37:09):
You got to get in nature.
Speaker 2 (37:10):
Man.
Speaker 1 (37:11):
Yeah, you know it's funny. I moved to the beach
here in Malibu about six months ago, and yeah, I
always would I lived here, you know, wanted to be
near the beach, but I just never did it. And
so Tran Dresser has a place here. And for thirty
years I've been going to a place going I would
love to live like this. And I turned sixty and
I call my brother who does my money, and I go, Tim,
(37:31):
I'm going to rent a house that's very expensive in
Malibu for one year. And I've been here and it's
changed so much in my life and world about my
own depression, my own joy of life, my own journey
that I you know now is the lease is coming
up and I'm looking at the prices, and you know,
(37:51):
I would give this money away in a minute without
thinking about it. But will I spend it on me
and my own happiness?
Speaker 2 (37:58):
Hello?
Speaker 1 (37:59):
Hello?
Speaker 2 (37:59):
Yeah? I tell people, roh, human beings have one job
and one job only self care. Yes, And when you
do that, your arms will be strong when the people
you love for yes, and that includes communities, charities all
(38:20):
of it. One thing you have to understand when tragic
things happen in your life. The first piece is to balance,
who were you before the shit happened? Okay? Or you
taking responsibility at least some of the responsibility for it happening. Yes,
come on now, oh, I created this great job, but
(38:40):
did you create this?
Speaker 1 (38:42):
Right?
Speaker 3 (38:43):
Take some responsibility?
Speaker 1 (38:44):
Right, you create everything?
Speaker 2 (38:46):
So come on, hey, right, hey, So you take responsibility
and then you balance. And then I got to change
my password because I'm getting I'm getting ready to tell
everybody what my password is. Okay, password is. I got up, bitches.
I got up bitches.
Speaker 1 (39:05):
That's a good one, man, that is a good one.
Mine for years was be still. Oh, because my desire
to confront all the wrongs and stand up for the
underdog and help every poor kid and save all.
Speaker 3 (39:20):
The abuse kids.
Speaker 1 (39:21):
It's too much. And I just had to tell myself
be still. So every time I signed in, that was
what I was doing. Be still. Okay, let me center myself.
Speaker 2 (39:30):
What I did too? So oft what I did too. Yes,
we have these great careers and all we want to
do is give back, and that is certainly what I do.
But I'm going to be honest with you. I take
care of Jennifer Lewis first, I really do. I take
care of myself first. The kids got this thing on
the internet where I say, I get up every morning,
(39:54):
I brush my teeth, I spin it out. I leaned
forward and look in the mirror. I pause, and I say,
pretty bitch, and then I go on my way.
Speaker 1 (40:07):
Then I go, I love you so much. Can I
tell you how wonderful the show is. I love this
for you. Oh my god, honey, what a little gem,
what a perfect little character study. You're wonderful in it.
All the women are amazing. One of my favorite shows.
And I heard it just got picked up right.
Speaker 3 (40:27):
Well, now, we don't know yet.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
You may know something I don't know.
Speaker 1 (40:30):
I heard from an actress on the show that there
is really yes, I did.
Speaker 3 (40:35):
Well, I have not heard yet.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
And you know I don't go skipping and jumping for
joy to that fucking contracted signed But am I enjoying?
First of all, let me just say that Vanessa Bayer
and Molly Shannon that mattered the whole cast. I am
in an environment now, and as I know, you know,
this is my best work. Yes, playing Patricia, I would
(40:57):
claim is my best work.
Speaker 1 (41:00):
It's beautiful.
Speaker 2 (41:01):
But I am in an environment where I can create
like that.
Speaker 1 (41:05):
Yes, makes all the difference.
Speaker 3 (41:07):
Oh my god. Molly Shannon and Vanessa Bear.
Speaker 1 (41:12):
Too good too. Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (41:14):
I have to say I have to say to Vanessa
Bear every episode I have to look at it, go
what Especially when I first got there, I.
Speaker 3 (41:21):
Go, what the fuck are you doing?
Speaker 1 (41:23):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (41:23):
Yeah, why did you just bite the air?
Speaker 1 (41:28):
Right?
Speaker 3 (41:29):
Who bites the air?
Speaker 2 (41:30):
That was Vanessa? Yeah, Vanansa and Platricia, my character has
this of course, stand there.
Speaker 3 (41:38):
And be the bitch that she is.
Speaker 2 (41:40):
Right, And I got Vanantha squeaking her pants.
Speaker 3 (41:43):
I got her doing all these other things. Oh my god, hilarious.
Speaker 2 (41:48):
I live for both.
Speaker 4 (41:49):
You know.
Speaker 1 (41:49):
I wasn't familiar with Vanessa's work. I really wasn't.
Speaker 2 (41:52):
And I wasn't either.
Speaker 3 (41:53):
We grew up with Molly.
Speaker 1 (41:54):
Yes, Molly, I knew everything and love everything, And I
was like, who's this other girl?
Speaker 2 (42:00):
She's unbelievable, she's so good. Molly is Oh, Jennifer, let's
massage the scene. Now.
Speaker 3 (42:09):
I'm like, here, come this bitch. I'm fifty.
Speaker 2 (42:12):
I can kick the same bitch that tongue catched the
tree and fell into uh chairs with Whitney Hilstones.
Speaker 3 (42:21):
When they called me Rosie.
Speaker 2 (42:23):
When they called me because I just finished eight years
on Blackish, right, would y'all leave me alone? But they
called me and said Molly Shannon, I said, bitch, you
had me at Hello. Yes, because it's nothing else. I know,
I'm gonna have fun and guests. Who was on the
Zoo WHUSA executive producer and creator saw the show. Vanessa
(42:47):
bed so I had no idea. Oh she was really
I've seen her work and and then you know and
say a night live. But we, like I said, we
grew up with Molly. And Vanessa's sitting there and I'm going, oh,
Molly shared it. Yeah, you have be in lo with
s and Vanessa and I joke about it all the time.
She said, I just sat there and thought she hates me,
(43:10):
but she's so good I still want to hire her.
Speaker 1 (43:15):
Well, she's a smart woman to cast all you and
the writing and best armstrong as her mom is just
I love to see.
Speaker 2 (43:24):
Her in mad Rogers, all of the ball of the fantastic,
I mean, and like I said, the best thing about
it is, we have created an environment in order to
give you guys like you said this gym. I love
that thing.
Speaker 1 (43:39):
I agree, gem of a show. Listen, Honey, I love
you and I could talk to you over and over
and over. I love you, love you soank you so much.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
All Right, Pumpkin.
Speaker 1 (43:47):
Jis so the same. Lois Lewis. Hey, We're about to
(44:11):
answer some of the questions that you our listeners have
sent in. You just record a voice memo on your
phone and then send it to Onward Rosie at gmail
dot com, and we will answer your question if we
see fit. Take it away. Who's the first question?
Speaker 4 (44:30):
Hi Rosey. My name is Matt Curry and I live
in Nova Scotia, Canada. Hi Matt Curry, thank you so
much for bringing this podcast to life. I'm so delighted
to have you back in my kitchen again and listening
to the interesting conversations that you're having so far. My
question is, what is the biggest misunderstanding about you?
Speaker 1 (44:54):
I think the biggest misunderstanding about me, Matt, is that
I'm tough. I have like a cadence and a kind
of continents of sort of being a tough New York girl,
you know. And when people get to meet me and
they have not met me before, They're like, I can't
believe what is softer you are? You know, I really am,
(45:14):
like I cry kind of often. I am very mushy,
I'm very emotional, and I'm not really all that tough,
although I do stand up for what I believe in.
But I think the biggest misconception is that I'm a toughie,
and frankly, I ain't all right. We got another one
coming up? Who we got next?
Speaker 5 (45:35):
Hello, Rosie. I'm Sandra and doctor Sandstorm on TikTok. I
wanted to congratulate you on your new podcast. I just
listened to it on a walk and it was just
so refreshing to hear you and Sharon talking about how
you visualized your futures and they came to pass. And
(45:58):
I just wanted to ask you a question. Knowing that
we do this, we visualize.
Speaker 6 (46:04):
Our futures and we manifest them, I wonder what you
think about all of the attention that we pay to
the negativities in our environment and what's going on in
our world. I'm the mother of a trans daughter and
I worry about her every day, and I have to
keep up on what's going on in the politics of
(46:26):
our country. And yet sometimes I feel like by focusing
on it, I'm bringing about more and I wonder what
your thoughts.
Speaker 1 (46:34):
Are on that. Wow, well that's a fascinating conversation. I
think my first thought, of course, would be to get
as much information as I could to keep my daughter safe.
And I also realized at the same time how overwhelming
that can be, especially now with the Republican led organized
(46:55):
attack on the LBGTA community, and it's terrifying what's happening
to trans people. It's terrifying how they're trying to use
us once again as a voting wedge, as as something
that they can use to anger and discredit and and
shame people and oftentimes get them killed. You know, I
(47:21):
think that we do give power to things and then
we can manifest them by thinking them. You know, I
think therefore I am. I mean, I do believe that
we choose and manifest our life as we as we
live it. And and the balance that we need to
(47:43):
find between information and instinct, between caring and coverage. You know,
that's a balance that we all have to struggle with
and find out how to make that work in our life. Hey,
thank you all for tuning in. Please leave me a
voice if you can. Next week on this podcast Onward
(48:04):
with Rosi o donald. I almost call it a blog
every day, that's how old I am. It's not a blog, people,
it's a podcast. Next week is Dylan mulvaney, who's a
wonderful young woman that you probably know from TikTok, who
filmed her transition and filmed a year of her life
as she transitioned from male to female. And she's a
(48:25):
wonderful young woman and we had a very interesting conversation.
She's the age of my elder children, and I feel
like a parent to her. I feel like, you know,
like a mom. And I was curious about things I
didn't understand and she definitely helped me. And all of
that comes out next week on Onward with Rosie o'
(48:48):
donald Dylan mulvany, So don't miss that. So thank you
all very much and peace out.
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