A Father’s Note to His “Timeless” Daughter…Who Functions at a Toddler Level

On this episode of Our American Stories, Richmond, VA radio host Jeff Katz shares a note that his daughter won't ever read, but will surely impact your life for the better

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:16):
This is Lee Habib, and this is our American Stories.
And today we hear from Jeff Katz. He's a radio
host in Richmond, Virginia, and he's also a columnist for
the Boston Herald, and here he shares his deeply personal
story about his teenage daughter, Julia, who has what doctors

(00:38):
call global developmental delays and disabilities. And all of that
means is that she functions physically and mentally at the
level of a toddler. Here's Jeff reading a note that
he wrote to his daughter.

Speaker 2 (01:03):
Dear Julia, I'm writing you this note on March seventh,
twenty eighteen. Today is the day that you turn fifteen
years old. It's an interesting day for me and for Mom,
but it's another day for you. You're not like other kids,
my sweep. You've never made a big deal of your birthday.

(01:23):
You've never asked us for any type of a special gift,
not for your birthday, not for Hanukkah, not for Christmas.
You've treated each and every day in the same way.
Mom will wake you up and you'll have a smile
on your face when you see her. She'll play some
of your music and you'll smile even more. You may

(01:43):
laugh or giggle or squeal, but there will not be
any words. You won't complain about having to go to school.
You won't be happy to hear that it is a
snow day. You won't celebrate the fact that today is
fifteen years since you were born. Most fifteen year old
girls would be thinking about clothing, college, or a car.

(02:05):
By fifteen. Many dads have already had to warn their
daughters about some dopey boy. But today you'll watch your
favorite episode of Jack's Big Music Show, enjoy your cereal,
and be on the lookout for cookies wherever you can
find them. Mom and I know that you will be
with us as long as we're alive, but we worry

(02:26):
about what happens after we're gone. You have two wonderful brothers,
and I pray every day that we have raised them
well enough to know that they will need to look
after you. Someday you may be our middle child, but
you'll always be the baby, even as you get older
according to the calendar. As Mom told me yesterday, you

(02:46):
are timeless. You'll always be my pipsqueak, despite the fact
that the years are flying by. No, we're not exploring
potential careers or making plans for your wedding. We're still
hoping that we'll be able to help you move from
diapers to the potties someday. You live today the same
way you did when you were about eighteen months old.

(03:09):
You don't speak, and you only recognize a few words,
But oh the words that you know, kisses and cookies.
No matter how filled up you are, there's always room
for a cookie or two. You don't understand when I
ask you how your day was, but you become laser
beam focused when you hear the crinkle of the wrapper
on a package of something sweet. No matter how sweet

(03:32):
that candy, it's still eclipsed by your genuinely sweet smile.
So many people live their lives asking for things, demanding things,
accumulating things. Most people never take the time to stop
and savor a piece of cake, or breathe deeply to
appreciate a gentle breeze like you do. I hear people

(03:53):
in this world use horrible, insulting language to describe kids
like you, and I want to shake them, yell at them.
Some mock disabled kiddos like you, and I feel like crying.
You don't understand their words, but I do. Sometimes I
really wish I did not. We never thought you would crawl,
let alone walk, but you showed us. Your situation and

(04:17):
challenges and disabilities have caused me to question my belief
in God on some days and have served to strengthen
it on others. You don't speak, but somehow you are
able to brighten my days in ways that I never imagined.
Without a single solitary word, You've made me a better
man and touched countless people. Hearing you cry ties my

(04:38):
stomach into knots. But your giggle is truly the happiest
sound that I have ever heard. I know you'll never
read this, nor would you understand this if I were
to read it to you, So let me just say
kisses and cookies, Jules Begoules. I tell you today what
I have told you on every March the seventh since

(04:58):
two thousand and three. Daddy loves you more than you
will ever.

Speaker 1 (05:04):
Know, and thank you for that reading. Jeff, You've made
me a better man, he wrote, your giggle is the
happiest sound I've ever heard. On Julia's unexpectedly learning how
to walk, Jeff told the Boston Herald that quote. It
was one of the proudest days of my life, one
of the happiest days of my life. But I also

(05:26):
have to tell you it's a terrifying situation because Julia
is like a toddler. She has no real understanding of, oh,
the stove is hot, or I could fall here or
a trip there. We're thrilled that she's trying to explore
on her own a little bit, and we're terrified at
the same time. And this is true for all of

(05:47):
us parents, but even more so for Jeff and his bride.
Jeff has said that it's tough to realize that he'll
never get to embarrass Julia by dancing with her at
her wedding. But quote, she's the best thing that's ever
happened to me. End quote. Last, but not least, he

(06:08):
said these words. Quote. She's never spoken a word, she's
never said a word to anybody, but she's touched more
people in her fifteen years on this earth than I
ever have. Her joy is pure to me. She's like
the face of God. She's the essence of good, and

(06:29):
she shares her joy with everybody. Jeff Katz's story, his
daughter Julia is here on our American stories, Folks, If

(07:29):
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