May 28, 2024 • 9 mins
On this episode of Our American Stories, "For now I must take the responsibility for keeping his life entwined with yours." Carmen Gordon remembers her husband Gary for their two children, sharing with them who he was - a responsible father.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
And we continue with our American stories and our special
Memorial Day broadcast. We're honoring all of the men and
women who have given their lives in service to our
nation and their families. Our next story starts in Somalia
the year nineteen ninety three. American forces were protecting a
humanitarian aid effort in the midst of a famine and
(00:32):
a civil war. During a mission to capture several of
the Somali warlord's top lieutenants, two US Blackhawk helicopters were
shot down. The ground task force was cobbled together to
secure the first crash site, where there weren't any resources
left for the second. Circling overhead, two Delta snipers Master
(00:52):
Sergeant Gary Gordon and Sergeant first Class Randy Shugart saw
how desperate the situation was.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
An armed force of.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Hundreds converged on the second crash site, and there was
no doubt about what an angry mob would do to
a downed American flight crew. So these two men asked
higher headquarters for permission to insert into the crash site.
This request was insane, It was also denied, with a
mob getting closer. Gordon and Shugart asked again they were
(01:22):
denied again. One more time they asked, and finally they
got the green light. The two men fought through one
hundred meter maize of shanties and shacks to reach the
critically injured crew of Super six four. They fired their
rifles and pistols with deadly accuracy, delaying a mob that
they knew they had no chance against. Running out of AMMO.
(01:43):
Gordon and Shugart were killed in action because of them.
The pilot, Michael Durant, eventually made it home alive. Gordon
and Shugart earned the Medal of Honor and set the
highest standard for love for American fighting men. But where
does that leave their families? Gary Gordon's widow, Carmen, wrote
this letter for their children, age six and age three.
Speaker 2 (02:12):
My dearest Ian and Brittany, I hope that in the
final moments of your father's life, his last thoughts were
not of us as he lay dying. I wanted him
to think only of the mission to which he pledged himself.
As you grow older, if I can show you the
love and responsibility he felt for his family, you will
(02:34):
understand my feelings. I did not want him to think
of me or of you, because I didn't want his
heart to break. Children were meant to have someone responsible
for them. No father ever took that more seriously than
your dad. Responsibility was a natural part of him, an
easy path to follow. Each day, after work his truck
(02:55):
pulled into our driveway, I watched the two of you
run to him, feet back, across the painted boards of
our porch, yelling Daddy. Every day I saw his face
when he saw you. You were the center of his life.
And when you turned one year old, your father was
beside himself with excitement, baking you a cake in the
shape of a train. On your last birthday, Brittany, he
(03:18):
sent you a handmade birthday card from Somalia. But your
father had two families. One was us and the other
was his comrades. He was true to both. He loved
his job, quiet and serious. Adventure filled some part of
him I could never fully know. After his death, one
(03:39):
of his comrades told me that, on a foreign mission,
your dad led his men across a snow covered ridge
that began to collapse. Racing across a yawning creface to safety,
he grinned wildly and yelled, wasn't that great? You will
hear many times about how your father died. You will
read what the President of the United States said when
(04:00):
he awarded the Medal of Honor. Gary Gordon died in
the most courageous and selfless way any human being connect
But you may still ask why. You may ask how
he could have been devoted to two families, so equally
dying for one but leaving the other. For your father,
(04:21):
there was no hard choices in life. Once he committed
to something, the way was clear. He chose to be
a husband and a father and never wavered in those roles.
He chose the military, and I shall not fail. Those
with whom I served became his simple religion. When his
other family needed him, he did not hesitate, as he
(04:44):
would not have hesitated for us. It may not have
been the best thing for us, but it was the
right thing for your dad. There are times now when
the image of him coming home comes back to me.
I see him, scoop you up in and I see
you bitney, you bury your head in his chest. I
dread the day when you stop talking and asking about him,
(05:06):
when he seems so long ago. So now I must
take the responsibility for keeping his life entwined with yours.
It's the responsibility I never wanted. But I know what
your father would say. Nothing you can do about it, Carmen,
Just keep going. Those times when the crying came as
(05:28):
I stood at the kitchen counter were never long enough.
You came in the front door, Brittany, saying, Mommy's sad.
You miss Daddy. You reminded me I had to keep going.
The ceremonies honoring your dad were hard. When they put
his photo in the Hall of Heroes at the Pentagon,
I thought, can this be all that is left? Picture?
(05:54):
Then General Sullivan read from the letter General Sherman wrote
to General Grant after the Civil War. Words so tender
that we all broke down. Throughout the war, you were
always in my mind. I always knew if I were
in trouble and you were still alive, you would come
to my assistance. One night, before either of you were born,
(06:14):
your dad and I had a funny little talk about dying.
I tease that I would not know where to bury him.
Very quietly, he said, a poem in my uniform. Your
dad never really liked to wear his uniform, and a poem.
Maine was far away from us. Only after he was
(06:37):
laid to rest in a tiny flag filled graveyard in Lincoln, Maine.
Did I understand his parents burying their only son could
come tomorrow and the day after that. You and I
would not have to pass this grave on the way
to the grocery store, to little league games, to ballet recitals.
Our lives would go on and to the And then
(07:00):
he loved and died for The uniform was a silent salute,
a final repeat of his vows. Once again he had
taken care of all of us. On a spring afternoon,
a soldier from your dad's unit brought me the things
from his military locker. At the bottom of a cardboard box,
beneath his boots, I found a letter written on a
(07:23):
small rual tablet. It was his voice, quiet but confident
in the words he wanted us to have. If something
should happen to him, we'll save it for you. But
so much of him is already inside you both. Let
it grow with you. Choose your own responsibilities in life,
but always always follow your heart. Your dad will be
(07:47):
watching over you, just as he always did.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
Love Mom, and a special thanks to Faith for reading
that letter that was written by Carmen Gordon to her
two children aged six to three, upon learning of her
husband and their father's death in battle. And that's of
course Master Sergeant Gary Gordon and anyone who has seen
(08:15):
Black Hawk Down. It's a must see movie for any
family about what happens in the battlefield and how these
men and women well the sacrificial nature of this kind
of love. Wanted to share with you an excerpt from
Gordon's letter to his wife in the event of his death.
I'm so very lucky to have you as a wife.
(08:37):
I know you have the ability to go far and
shall as long as you believe. It takes longer to
build that foundation because the bricks break off now and again.
Life's funny. Sometimes the key is to keep a sense
of humor. Don't take it seriously, enjoy it. The real
secret to life is already inside us. Dig a little
(09:01):
deeper the story of Master Sergeant Gary Gordon, the story
of Carmen and her kids, in a way through this letter,
celebrating and honoring all who died in the battlefield here
on Memorial Day. Our special Memorial Day broadcast continues here
on our American Stories
And we continue with our American stories and our special
Memorial Day broadcast. We're honoring all of the men and
women who have given their lives in service to our
nation and their families. Our next story starts in Somalia
the year nineteen ninety three. American forces were protecting a
humanitarian aid effort in the midst of a famine and
(00:32):
a civil war. During a mission to capture several of
the Somali warlord's top lieutenants, two US Blackhawk helicopters were
shot down. The ground task force was cobbled together to
secure the first crash site, where there weren't any resources
left for the second. Circling overhead, two Delta snipers Master
(00:52):
Sergeant Gary Gordon and Sergeant first Class Randy Shugart saw
how desperate the situation was.
Speaker 2 (00:59):
An armed force of.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Hundreds converged on the second crash site, and there was
no doubt about what an angry mob would do to
a downed American flight crew. So these two men asked
higher headquarters for permission to insert into the crash site.
This request was insane, It was also denied, with a
mob getting closer. Gordon and Shugart asked again they were
(01:22):
denied again. One more time they asked, and finally they
got the green light. The two men fought through one
hundred meter maize of shanties and shacks to reach the
critically injured crew of Super six four. They fired their
rifles and pistols with deadly accuracy, delaying a mob that
they knew they had no chance against. Running out of AMMO.
(01:43):
Gordon and Shugart were killed in action because of them.
The pilot, Michael Durant, eventually made it home alive. Gordon
and Shugart earned the Medal of Honor and set the
highest standard for love for American fighting men. But where
does that leave their families? Gary Gordon's widow, Carmen, wrote
this letter for their children, age six and age three.
Speaker 2 (02:12):
My dearest Ian and Brittany, I hope that in the
final moments of your father's life, his last thoughts were
not of us as he lay dying. I wanted him
to think only of the mission to which he pledged himself.
As you grow older, if I can show you the
love and responsibility he felt for his family, you will
(02:34):
understand my feelings. I did not want him to think
of me or of you, because I didn't want his
heart to break. Children were meant to have someone responsible
for them. No father ever took that more seriously than
your dad. Responsibility was a natural part of him, an
easy path to follow. Each day, after work his truck
(02:55):
pulled into our driveway, I watched the two of you
run to him, feet back, across the painted boards of
our porch, yelling Daddy. Every day I saw his face
when he saw you. You were the center of his life.
And when you turned one year old, your father was
beside himself with excitement, baking you a cake in the
shape of a train. On your last birthday, Brittany, he
(03:18):
sent you a handmade birthday card from Somalia. But your
father had two families. One was us and the other
was his comrades. He was true to both. He loved
his job, quiet and serious. Adventure filled some part of
him I could never fully know. After his death, one
(03:39):
of his comrades told me that, on a foreign mission,
your dad led his men across a snow covered ridge
that began to collapse. Racing across a yawning creface to safety,
he grinned wildly and yelled, wasn't that great? You will
hear many times about how your father died. You will
read what the President of the United States said when
(04:00):
he awarded the Medal of Honor. Gary Gordon died in
the most courageous and selfless way any human being connect
But you may still ask why. You may ask how
he could have been devoted to two families, so equally
dying for one but leaving the other. For your father,
(04:21):
there was no hard choices in life. Once he committed
to something, the way was clear. He chose to be
a husband and a father and never wavered in those roles.
He chose the military, and I shall not fail. Those
with whom I served became his simple religion. When his
other family needed him, he did not hesitate, as he
(04:44):
would not have hesitated for us. It may not have
been the best thing for us, but it was the
right thing for your dad. There are times now when
the image of him coming home comes back to me.
I see him, scoop you up in and I see
you bitney, you bury your head in his chest. I
dread the day when you stop talking and asking about him,
(05:06):
when he seems so long ago. So now I must
take the responsibility for keeping his life entwined with yours.
It's the responsibility I never wanted. But I know what
your father would say. Nothing you can do about it, Carmen,
Just keep going. Those times when the crying came as
(05:28):
I stood at the kitchen counter were never long enough.
You came in the front door, Brittany, saying, Mommy's sad.
You miss Daddy. You reminded me I had to keep going.
The ceremonies honoring your dad were hard. When they put
his photo in the Hall of Heroes at the Pentagon,
I thought, can this be all that is left? Picture?
(05:54):
Then General Sullivan read from the letter General Sherman wrote
to General Grant after the Civil War. Words so tender
that we all broke down. Throughout the war, you were
always in my mind. I always knew if I were
in trouble and you were still alive, you would come
to my assistance. One night, before either of you were born,
(06:14):
your dad and I had a funny little talk about dying.
I tease that I would not know where to bury him.
Very quietly, he said, a poem in my uniform. Your
dad never really liked to wear his uniform, and a poem.
Maine was far away from us. Only after he was
(06:37):
laid to rest in a tiny flag filled graveyard in Lincoln, Maine.
Did I understand his parents burying their only son could
come tomorrow and the day after that. You and I
would not have to pass this grave on the way
to the grocery store, to little league games, to ballet recitals.
Our lives would go on and to the And then
(07:00):
he loved and died for The uniform was a silent salute,
a final repeat of his vows. Once again he had
taken care of all of us. On a spring afternoon,
a soldier from your dad's unit brought me the things
from his military locker. At the bottom of a cardboard box,
beneath his boots, I found a letter written on a
(07:23):
small rual tablet. It was his voice, quiet but confident
in the words he wanted us to have. If something
should happen to him, we'll save it for you. But
so much of him is already inside you both. Let
it grow with you. Choose your own responsibilities in life,
but always always follow your heart. Your dad will be
(07:47):
watching over you, just as he always did.
Speaker 1 (07:51):
Love Mom, and a special thanks to Faith for reading
that letter that was written by Carmen Gordon to her
two children aged six to three, upon learning of her
husband and their father's death in battle. And that's of
course Master Sergeant Gary Gordon and anyone who has seen
(08:15):
Black Hawk Down. It's a must see movie for any
family about what happens in the battlefield and how these
men and women well the sacrificial nature of this kind
of love. Wanted to share with you an excerpt from
Gordon's letter to his wife in the event of his death.
I'm so very lucky to have you as a wife.
(08:37):
I know you have the ability to go far and
shall as long as you believe. It takes longer to
build that foundation because the bricks break off now and again.
Life's funny. Sometimes the key is to keep a sense
of humor. Don't take it seriously, enjoy it. The real
secret to life is already inside us. Dig a little
(09:01):
deeper the story of Master Sergeant Gary Gordon, the story
of Carmen and her kids, in a way through this letter,
celebrating and honoring all who died in the battlefield here
on Memorial Day. Our special Memorial Day broadcast continues here
on our American Stories
Host
Lee Habeeb
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