May 7, 2024 • 32 mins
LIVE from Moontower Comedy Festival in Austin, Ophira talks with comedians and parents Rosebud Baker and Andy Haynes about their 6 month old daughter, which parent is more patient, and why Andy thought expired kimchi might kill them all.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
I used to be chair, so I let them start
aping of sales fun pantos at joke. Hello listeners, this
is parenting is a joke. I'm a lunch of flat
seltzer and old triskets named Olfira Eisenberg. On the show,
we bring together stand up comedians to talk about their
(00:20):
creative careers and how they are.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Managing to work, create, and perform while also raising kids.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
How the fuck are they doing it? So We're just
days away from Mother's Day and I gotta.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
Say, I'm tired. Oh my god, I'm tired, and I
forget how I'm supposed to handle Mother's Day. Am I
supposed to lovingly spend it with my child? Or am
I supposed to intentionally plan things that.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Don't include my family to celebrate myself.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
You know what, I'm sick of my family, but I'm
also sick of me.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
Here's what I want.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
I want a deprivation tank experience four hours.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
I want to feel nothing.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Okay. One fun thing I did recently was the Moontower Festival.
Speaker 3 (01:10):
In Austin, Texas, AH.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
It was a great time and I also was able
to do a live version of this show at that festival.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
It was a blast.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
I talked to Andy Haynes and were Rosebud Baker. They
are fantastic comedians. They are married, they have a nine
month old daughter, and I recorded it and I bring
it to you here. By the way, I loved Rosebud's
reaction to my asking her how she's going to spend
her first Mother's Day?
Speaker 4 (01:37):
Am I is that? Do I have to plan that too?
Then no, I'm then I'm boycotting.
Speaker 5 (01:48):
Yeah, have to do.
Speaker 4 (01:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
So here's our live show from Austin, Texas. Right after
the break. Hello everybody, Oh my goodness, six pm in
(02:13):
torrential rainstorm.
Speaker 5 (02:15):
Thank you so much for coming. I didn't know anyone
was gonna show up. Look at this. It's amazing. Thank you,
thank you, thank you, thank you.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
Welcome.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Also, I say six pm show because that is I
like a six pm show. I have to admit, yes,
you do too. And you know what I like a
six pm crowd. I'm not gonna lie I do because
I always feel like six pm crowd. There's I'm both
of the kinds of people that are in this crowd,
because some of you this is just your six pm.
(02:44):
You've got an eight, you've got a nine, you've got
a twelve you might be.
Speaker 5 (02:47):
Going till two am right there, all right?
Speaker 1 (02:49):
And others of you you are dead set in being.
Speaker 5 (02:53):
In bed at nine thirty. That's right.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Yeah, you're both here. Welcome, welcome, all right, everybody. I
am going to bring up our next comic, one of
my favorites from New York. He's been on Comedy Central, HBO,
and here right now, put your hands together for Andy Heyn.
Speaker 6 (03:19):
Pharaoh Eisenberg. How is everybody you guys?
Speaker 7 (03:22):
Good? Nice? Nice, nice. I'm happy to be here. This
is exciting with all the parents.
Speaker 6 (03:34):
I'm a new dad. Yeah, I'm a new dad. That's exciting.
Speaker 7 (03:39):
She's thirteen. I decided to go home. She got good
grades this year. So no, she's a six month old.
I have a little six month old baby girl, and
it's fun to become a dad. I'm trying to be
a better person. That's something I'm like trying to learn
how to be better at My therapist said, I need
to improve myself talk. That's like she said, I need
(03:59):
to be nice to myself because the baby can pick
up on that, which is weird because like if the
baby sits up, she shits up her back. But apparently
she can also like read a room that's like another
you can see her heart beat through the top of
her head. But she's also very sensitive to vibe. So, yeah,
(04:20):
we did IVF. That's what we did. We did IVF.
It was pretty crazy. If you guys don't know, that's
not how we got pregnant. We got pregnant in the
old fashioned way. But we still did IVF, which was
a good investment of thirty thousand dollars. It's it's kind
of rough on guys too, because we have to jerk
off at the doctor's office, which I don't know. If
(04:41):
you guys know this, you're usually not supposed to do.
Usually they don't want you to do that. Usually they're like, hey,
don't do that, we told you about this before. Stop
making eye contact. And this time they wanted me to.
This time, I made an appointment. I've never made an
appointment to masturbate my entire life. I made a Google
Calendar event to jerk off, and then I got there
(05:04):
and they were like, get in here, creep. I had
them say that it's the only way I can get hard,
and then they did. They took me this little room,
and the little room is called like a donation room.
Nobody wants these donations. Uh, in the little room, it's
it's a It was a couch and a flat screen TV.
(05:26):
And the flat screen TV had apps on it. And
I didn't know you could do this. There was a
porn Hub app, which I know that's sensitive in Texas
right now, but but like, I didn't know you could
put porn ub on the home screen of your television,
just like letting everybody know where you're doing that. You
know what is crazy. I turned on the TV. It
was like Hulu, porn Hub, Disney Plus, and I masturbated
(05:49):
to Elsa. But that's because we were freezing our embryos,
so it seemed appropriate. All right, I've offended some of
you guys. Thank you very much. I'm Andy Haynes. You
guys have been good sport. I promise to be nicer.
I'll become a nicer dad soon.
Speaker 5 (06:06):
Any hates everybody got you?
Speaker 6 (06:10):
Do you want to be over here? Okay, I'm gonna
move farther away.
Speaker 5 (06:15):
It's so yeah, there you go.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
It's so interesting to think, I mean, because I have
never been in the situation where I'm obviously giving seamen.
But I've been told so many different things about what
is available to inspire you.
Speaker 7 (06:29):
Yeah, it's always uncomfortable. I can't imagine, because you know,
it's like awkward to go into the doctor's office to
do a lot of things. You know, even to pee
is kind of weird to like carry that little cup.
But then there's like a woman walking you back and
she knows you're about to jerk off. That's never something
you do in your life. Like I gave somebody insurance
(06:50):
and then they're like, all right, come this way, you
piece of shit, and then they don't use like medical porn.
Speaker 6 (06:58):
But it's just the porn.
Speaker 7 (07:00):
Yeah, it's not like Glacko Smith Klimb porn.
Speaker 5 (07:09):
Becas corn.
Speaker 6 (07:10):
Yeah, exactly did you?
Speaker 2 (07:12):
Now?
Speaker 5 (07:12):
Did you always want to have kids?
Speaker 2 (07:14):
And for what?
Speaker 5 (07:14):
And I will just.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Say total assumption right now, I'm going to say any
that you strike me as someone who always wanted kids,
but I that is just me.
Speaker 6 (07:22):
No, I did.
Speaker 7 (07:23):
I was like, I was a ski instructor and a
summer camp counselor and we had foster kids growing up
my entire life.
Speaker 6 (07:31):
So I've changed.
Speaker 7 (07:32):
I changed about twenty thousand diapers before I turned eighteen,
Are you kidding?
Speaker 6 (07:36):
Yeah? So I kind of wanted to keep I loved
just doing it so much.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
You're like, wow, you were nineteen just being like you
know what I miss.
Speaker 6 (07:46):
I was in college and I was like, how's it going.
Speaker 7 (07:51):
Yeah, it's It's funny though, because my daughter is like,
you know, like she's six months, so she's like coming
online and she's got a new thing where she'll wake
up from a nap and she's a very gassy baby
and she'll turn over and fart and then start laughing.
Speaker 6 (08:07):
It's pretty it's pretty amazing.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
I remember I was, you know, I had this thing
where I was like, my baby's doing everything earlier than
other babies, which was wrong. And I remember being in
an appointment with the pediatrician and I was like, he's
already smiling. I know that's not really a thing that
happens yet, and he was like.
Speaker 5 (08:24):
That's gas. There you go.
Speaker 7 (08:30):
Did you find the thing with the pediatrician where they
would never tell you definitives like with things.
Speaker 5 (08:36):
Oh, like they're dodging a lawsuit.
Speaker 6 (08:38):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 7 (08:40):
Like our daughter got this thing called impetigo, which is
like a staph infection and it's pretty common or whatever.
But then it was also our fault. We brought her
to Florida, and but we were like is it okay?
And he's like, yeah, I think she's gonna be all right.
And we were like is she okay and he's like probably, yeah, right.
Speaker 6 (09:00):
You know.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
I remember actually calling my pediatrician at a normal time,
was in the middle of a night, with something like
three in the afternoon, and I was like, okay, he's
able to you know, all the thing about it used
to be you could put them on their back, and
then it was on the front, which way you have
your baby fall asleep, and so it was all about
the back, and you.
Speaker 5 (09:16):
Would I mean, I don't know if you have had
to deal with that.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
There's like a weighted there are little weighted suits you
put them in and then they just look like you
know there, they just look like they're like weird splayed lobsters.
Speaker 7 (09:30):
On the Yeah, we had we had one of those,
the starfish. Yes, but we also gave our baby weights
because we wanted to.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
So I was like, oh, he's he's strong enough now
to go on his stomach, so I'm not going to
wake up every five minutes to check what should I do?
Speaker 5 (09:47):
And she literally went.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Yeah, that sounds, don't I don't know. I was like,
is that your medical answer?
Speaker 2 (09:54):
You don't know?
Speaker 5 (09:55):
And she was like, well, I guess you could get up.
Speaker 8 (09:57):
God.
Speaker 5 (10:00):
Yeah, so you know what I did nothing? Yeah, yeah,
I did nothing.
Speaker 7 (10:05):
It's hard because my wife is next so I don't
want to give away too much of her stuff. But
she's got a good story about the pediatrician. Hey, Rosie,
tell that joke the pediatrician did.
Speaker 5 (10:15):
Let me so let me ask you this. How freaked
out were you?
Speaker 1 (10:18):
I mean you're within the first six months, but how
freaked out were you within the first week. Since you
had a lot of babies around you, I feel like
you were probably pretty calm about them.
Speaker 7 (10:28):
I got weird, irrational fears about like I would like
go outside to get Rosie smoothie, and I would like
touch a door, and then I would come back and
I'd make the baby a bottle, and then I'd be like, that.
Speaker 6 (10:39):
Was New York door.
Speaker 7 (10:41):
I touched fair enough, you know, But it was like
it started before that. I remember one time I made
her like miso soup and I put kimchi in it,
and then she ate it, and then I was like,
I think the Kimchie's old, and then I.
Speaker 6 (10:54):
Was like, the Kimchie's gonna kill them both. And I
didn't say anything. I just didn't sleep that night.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
And do you mention that you were a professional skier,
So what does that mean? Were you you were a
competitive skier?
Speaker 7 (11:09):
Yeah, I mean I tried. I was an unprofessional professional skier.
I found out I was an alcoholic midway through that process.
That's what happens when real quick story. I moved to
Tahoe no plan, went to junior college at night, but
had no idea what I was where I was going
to live. Yeah, and I was with four other eighteen
year olds and we'd go to rent a house and
(11:30):
they'd be like, you can fuck right off. No, and
so we lived in a motel and then we got
a house eventually that was twenty miles from civilization. So
you know, you you have to become an alcoholic at
that point.
Speaker 6 (11:42):
I think it's kind of the rule.
Speaker 5 (11:43):
I was just wondering too, if, like you are dealing
with injuries from.
Speaker 7 (11:47):
Skiing, Yeah, I have like a broken disk at the
base of my spine and both my knees are torn apart.
Speaker 6 (11:52):
And it's a great sport.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
I love it, so I mean, some people who are
skiers are very feel, very strongly about it.
Speaker 5 (11:59):
We're going to our little kid on skis as soon
as they walk.
Speaker 7 (12:02):
Yeah, I'm not. I'm going to just put her on
a mono ski and just center now. Yeah yeah, now
I'd like her to ski. But the East Coast sucks.
Speaker 5 (12:11):
Oh wow, yeah yeah. Well, I mean, I'm from Canada,
so I'm with you.
Speaker 7 (12:15):
But yeah, you know, so I can't believe you totally
these people. You're from Canada, We're in Texas. Cut She's
from Alberta, the Texas of Canada.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
It is true. Yeah, we're closer than you think. I
grew up with a lot of people from Dallas around
me because they come up for the rodeo or the
oil or the oil. Yeah they said the rodeo.
Speaker 5 (12:34):
But now I understand what was really going on.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
And you are really into I'll say, like English soccer,
but football.
Speaker 6 (12:42):
Yes, yes, the beautiful game.
Speaker 5 (12:44):
And you work in that sometimes I do.
Speaker 7 (12:48):
I've worked in a little bit of football media, soccer media.
Speaker 6 (12:51):
I know.
Speaker 7 (12:51):
Sorry, you guys are get confused by the football. But
I got a job in England. For all of twenty
twenty two, I worked in London, what's your team? My
team that I did not work for because that would
have been a good job was is Arsenal. That's like
the team I scored the most him. There we go,
a couple of people coming along. Let's go Gooner's all right,
big win today? Tottenham Hotspur the shit because there's a chant.
(13:16):
How do you feel about Tottenham?
Speaker 6 (13:17):
Shit? How do you feel about shit Tottenham?
Speaker 5 (13:20):
That's the chance. Yeah, I fucking love them.
Speaker 6 (13:22):
Yeah, they're pretty beautiful.
Speaker 1 (13:24):
And so have you do people send you like little
jerseys or hats for your kids that say Arsenal.
Speaker 7 (13:30):
She's got an entire, like week's wardrobe of Arsenal stuff.
Speaker 6 (13:34):
Yeah, it's pretty amazing.
Speaker 1 (13:35):
Yeah, sat her in front of the I mean, she's
not watching television.
Speaker 6 (13:39):
She's watched a lot of games. I don't know if
she cares, but she's watched a lot of games.
Speaker 7 (13:44):
You know, like you know when you when you stop
being a good parent because you haven't slept for four days. Yeah,
she went on sleep strike a couple of weeks ago,
And it just happened to be that the game was early,
and I just put her in that biorn bouncer and
I laid on the couch for the whole game.
Speaker 1 (13:59):
Doing that is a number one dad. Move right there.
That is a number one dad, right there? Yeah, all right, Andy,
thank you so much. I'm gonna have you to come
back on after Rosie's done to sell you.
Speaker 7 (14:15):
Now, okay, awesome, thank you guys.
Speaker 1 (14:25):
Hey, we're back from the break back to our live
taping of Parenting as a Joke in Austin, Texas at
the Moontower Festival. So on our show, we had stand
up from the hilarious Rosebud Baker. But to hear those jokes,
you'll have to wait for her comedy.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
Special coming out later this year.
Speaker 1 (14:43):
But I did talk to her on stage, and one
thing she revealed in her stand up is that during
her pregnancy she had to deal with something called SPD,
which is symphysis pubis dysfunction.
Speaker 5 (14:56):
I had never heard about it before, but it's.
Speaker 1 (14:58):
Incredibly common and per usual, not often talked about. So
this is an uncomfortable set of symptoms caused by a
stiffness in your pelvic joints. As if being pregnant was
not uncomfortable enough, she had to deal with this, So
I reference that right at the beginning of our conversation.
(15:18):
So here it is back to our conversation at the
Moontower Festival with rosebud Baker.
Speaker 3 (15:23):
I know you're gonna love it. I am so pleased
to bring on our next comic.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
She also, as you found out, that she is married
to Andy, who was just here, so it's great to
have two parent comics on a show. She's a writer
for Saturday Night Live. And also she has a new
comedy special that she is finishing that you'll be able
to enjoy very soon. But here for you right now,
rosebud Baker, everybody, thank you.
Speaker 4 (15:53):
Where do I stand? Do I stand in the middle?
Speaker 5 (15:55):
So where everyone's casual?
Speaker 4 (15:56):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (15:57):
But hey, I did not know that you had to
experience what's the acronym that you just spd?
Speaker 8 (16:03):
SPD Still don't know what it stands for, but yeah,
got the word pubic is in there, so I just
try not to say it, of course.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Yeah, and I'm sorry. So how how long did that
was that an issue for you?
Speaker 5 (16:16):
It was?
Speaker 4 (16:16):
I was diagnosed with it.
Speaker 8 (16:18):
I felt it first at twenty weeks, and then by
thirty weeks I was in so much pain I couldn't
like roll over in bed anymore. So yeah, it was
it was like, I think I got diagnosed around thirty.
Speaker 5 (16:32):
Weeks, but I saw you doing shows.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Yeah, so you were just doing that through, yeah, appreciating pain.
Speaker 8 (16:38):
Yeah yeah, yeah, just pushing through. It's good practice for parenting,
you know. It's that's pretty much my life now, so right, yeah,
just in a different way.
Speaker 4 (16:48):
I'm just like, I'm in hell, what's going on?
Speaker 8 (16:50):
Yeah, we gotta get something done.
Speaker 5 (16:53):
Did you always want kids? No?
Speaker 4 (16:55):
I was really torn about it.
Speaker 8 (16:57):
Yeah, I was really like up and down about it
when we when we did IVF, I was like, oh, well,
this will buy me some time to decide, you know,
if I want to actually have kids, you know, and
because it was like it's like torturing yourself being like, oh,
I'm running out of time and I don't know, and
(17:19):
you know, so I was like, let's do IVF and
we did it and it was it was fine. I mean,
it was a walk in the park compared to pregnancy.
But yeah, so that was kind of like it happened.
Speaker 4 (17:30):
Yeah, we got.
Speaker 8 (17:31):
Actually got pregnant, like raw dog in it when I
had COVID like two months later. So yeah, she's not
her best work, but she's she's a little dumb but
she's strong. You know, she's a survivor.
Speaker 5 (17:50):
I'm just gonna do great.
Speaker 4 (17:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Lead When you were pregnant before, obviously you had to
deal with just like the actual issue of the pubic
pelvis situation.
Speaker 8 (18:00):
Are you one of the police. Don't call it that ever. Yeah? Yeah?
Speaker 7 (18:07):
Did you?
Speaker 1 (18:07):
Were you Like, I'm not gonna eat sushi. I'm not
gonna eat soft cheese. I'm not gonna have salad at
a restaurant.
Speaker 4 (18:13):
No, I ate everything.
Speaker 8 (18:15):
I mean, I I don't really eat that much anyway,
Like I kind of I don't. I'm a very picky eater.
So anything that they were like, they were like, don't
eat fish. I was like, I don't eat fish. They
look the same dead as they do alive. I don't
want them.
Speaker 4 (18:29):
I don't.
Speaker 8 (18:30):
They were like, don't eat uh, I don't know whatever.
Else they were like soft cheeses. Yeah, that kind of
just didn't really appeal to me. I just ate like
bags and bags of frozen cherries, and I would yeah,
and you know, typical like weird pregnant stuff where I'd
like buy a watermelon, cut it in half and just.
Speaker 4 (18:49):
Eat it with a spoon and then yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
Okay, and you know how the first whatever you're you're
dealing what I called handbag phase because you can walk
around with a baby in.
Speaker 4 (19:01):
Yes, but it's that's a perfect name for it. Yeah,
bag face.
Speaker 5 (19:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:06):
But you have this great joke where you talk about
Andy checking your work because he was the person that
felt like everything had, you know, just some danger.
Speaker 5 (19:15):
Yes, did you feel pretty relaxed?
Speaker 4 (19:16):
I feel totally relaxed.
Speaker 3 (19:18):
That's amazing.
Speaker 8 (19:18):
I mean I saw her, I was like, oh, this
is a fucking ox. I was like, she's sturdy as hell.
I was like, I don't know, she's gonna be fine.
She's built like Andy. I mean, well, like she's six
months old. And when I carry her around, I look
like I'm carrying Andy Like it's ridiculous.
Speaker 4 (19:36):
And I was always like, oh, I'm never going.
Speaker 8 (19:38):
To comment on my baby's weight or the shape of
my baby's body. But I'm like, god damn, look at her.
Like you when they come out, you're proud of it,
you know what I mean? Yeah, you're like, look at
this thing. Did the Petrician go like she's in the
blah blah? Well I had I had a planned C
section because I was like, no work for me, please,
I would like to lay back and sort of wake
(19:59):
up to a up at show.
Speaker 4 (20:00):
And that is what a sea section is.
Speaker 8 (20:03):
They just sort of pop, they go, look look what
mommy made, and and and so. I when I was
doing that, when I was having the sea section, I
had a doctor who was like an Italian doctor, and
she was down there and you know, you're awake, so
you can kind of feel the table like jost selling
around and I was like, this feels like a lot
(20:24):
of movement, feels like aggressive, whatever's going on on the
other side of this.
Speaker 4 (20:29):
And I just heard her go.
Speaker 8 (20:31):
That's a big baby.
Speaker 4 (20:35):
It was like, we're gonna need a bigger boat, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 8 (20:37):
That's so I feel like that I knew when that happened.
Speaker 5 (20:42):
That's a good thing. Yeah. You have these incredible.
Speaker 1 (20:45):
Stories about being brought up as you were talking about
a Republican family and you as a kid went to
the White House numerous times.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
Is that right?
Speaker 4 (20:53):
Yeah? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (20:54):
Is there any part of that from your childhood that
you're like, I kind of would like.
Speaker 5 (20:59):
My kid to experience this.
Speaker 8 (21:01):
No, zero, no, Yeah, the White House is so born. Okay, So,
my my granddad was Secretary of State under George Bush
Senior and his name is James Baker. And yeah, and
so you know, I could have been in the Illuminati
and instead I do this. Yeah, I'm glad. You guys
(21:24):
are proud. They're not, they're not thrilled with it. But
I you know, going to the White House and all that.
I remember being a kid and going and being like, wait,
so this is a rental Like this is just a
rental home. And also it's kind of it's dark. It's
like Graceland, you know what I mean, Like everything's kind
(21:45):
of damp and old, and it feels haunted. And and
also you had to be on like your best behavior.
And I was like, add had all kinds of behavioral problems.
So like, you know, anytime we went to the White House,
I was like, oh god, we're going to like Granddad's
work again, and I have to act like someone I'm not.
(22:06):
And it was just like the work. It always I
always felt very out of place.
Speaker 4 (22:09):
Yeah, you know, with all the right yeahleas.
Speaker 5 (22:12):
For kids, doesn't seem like kids are running down the.
Speaker 8 (22:14):
Wad, right, I mean, you know, not like a comedy festival.
Is this is way better. I'm doing things different.
Speaker 5 (22:23):
I love that you brought your daughter with you to
this comedy festival.
Speaker 1 (22:26):
Yeah, I mean part of me goes like I wish
you would normalize that, but also you need an incredible
amount of help just to.
Speaker 5 (22:32):
Make that happen.
Speaker 4 (22:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
So I did it a little bit too, And I
will tell you that the hardest thing I found was
the brain switch.
Speaker 5 (22:39):
I don't know if you experienced that.
Speaker 1 (22:40):
Like I was with my child and then all of
a sudden, I was like, now I've got to be
this person.
Speaker 5 (22:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 8 (22:46):
Yeah, I'm finding that it's actually like changing things for
me on stage. None of this is going to be funny,
but it's changing things for me on stage in a
way where it's like, I I do feel like a
different person now and I'm still me, but it's very
but I feel a lot softer. I feel like I'm
(23:08):
a woman for the first time, Like not because you know,
it's like you're as a stand up comic, You're you're
constantly trying to fit into a world of men. Even
though there's a lot of women comics now, and but
there's sort of a every female comic has kind of
a masculine energy, and it's because we're we have to
fit into this other world of like middle aged men
(23:32):
and uh, and so getting pregnant was like, oh, this
is gonna throw a wrench in all of the character
structure that I've kind of built up for myself. And
I think it's becoming really interesting for me because I'm like, oh,
what would happen if I was just me on stage?
Speaker 4 (23:49):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 8 (23:50):
And that's and stuff is happening. I'm getting jokes that
I never would have told before. I'm mining my life
for material in ways that I know ever did, and
hopefully it ends up being all funny.
Speaker 4 (24:04):
But either way, it's interesting, you know.
Speaker 1 (24:08):
So, yes, the identity shifts, so most people feel like
they really struggle with that who am I now?
Speaker 5 (24:13):
But to kind of use it to actually help you creatively.
Speaker 8 (24:16):
Right, I mean, not knowing is a very creative place
to be in, right. It's like being certain is kind
of the death of creativity.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
So yeah, yeah, And I saw that you have a
big tour coming up and you your tour poster is
you with your baby?
Speaker 5 (24:34):
Is that accurate that you were taking your child with
you on tour?
Speaker 4 (24:37):
Yeah? Yeah?
Speaker 5 (24:38):
Really, yeah, amazing.
Speaker 8 (24:40):
Yeah, I'm really excited. I'm really excited. I mean I
want to bring her over. She's awesome. Yeah, she's my
favorite person.
Speaker 5 (24:47):
So and speak, this is gonna be your first Mother's
Day in just a couple of weeks?
Speaker 4 (24:50):
Is it in a couple of weeks?
Speaker 5 (24:52):
Yeah? Like three or a month whatever.
Speaker 4 (24:54):
We didn't even think about that. Yeah, that is that's true.
Speaker 5 (24:57):
Do you know any do you want? Do you have
an idea of what you want to do?
Speaker 4 (24:59):
Or am I is that? Do I have to plan
that too?
Speaker 1 (25:05):
Usually, I mean classically they stick you with the kids
and they take off.
Speaker 4 (25:11):
Then no, I'm then I'm boycotting.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
Yeah, you have to do Yeah, Andy, and you as
people dealing with this, I found out when my husband
and I would do really approach projects differently when we
had to take care of a child.
Speaker 5 (25:28):
Yes, what do you guys approach differently?
Speaker 8 (25:30):
Oh my god, it's like every I don't even know.
I don't even know where to start because it's like
even coming here right like I we were, we got
enough fight coming here because the rain was happening and
there wasn't a pick up for us, and he wanted
to call an uber and I was like, everything's gonna
be fine, like the car's gonna come, and he was like, well,
we you know, and he has a really he has
(25:52):
a really good point, which is like, what if it
doesn't work out, you know what I mean. But I'm
always like, it's gonna work out. It's fine, everything's gonna be.
We're gonna get there. What's what are they going to
start the show without comics there?
Speaker 6 (26:04):
You know?
Speaker 8 (26:04):
I but it's like, I you know, but that's also
like a selfish you know, so I'm an I'm kind
of the asshole most of the time. I do find that,
like I am the asshole in most of our arguments.
Although I am not the first to admit that it
(26:29):
won't matter they can record it, You're still gonna be
the first to apologize.
Speaker 5 (26:33):
It's not the weirdest couple therapies, lack of sleep.
Speaker 4 (26:40):
Me me, oh yeah, for sure.
Speaker 8 (26:43):
I mean I worked at SNL for three years before
I had a baby, so it's literally the same thing.
It's just it's like it's psychological torture and uh and
you just have to sort of maintain uh uh you
just got to get shit done, you know.
Speaker 4 (26:59):
So it's like I learned how to do that.
Speaker 5 (27:01):
That's amazing.
Speaker 8 (27:02):
Yeah, I've said to everybody at US and L I'm like,
you've already done it, Like if aside from the breastfeeding portion,
I'm like, you guys have got it, you know, if
you've got a kid and you work at us now,
it's like you're already not.
Speaker 4 (27:14):
Sleeping, so why not?
Speaker 5 (27:16):
Yeah, just keep going?
Speaker 4 (27:17):
Yeah, not keep humanity going while you're out at life.
Speaker 5 (27:20):
Who's more patient you were? Andy?
Speaker 8 (27:25):
I think I was gonna say Andy, but it's also
like we're patient in different ways. I feel like he
could help answer this question, but I because I don't
know how to answer it, like fully.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Andy, who's more patient you were? Rosebud? Rosebud's Rosebud's cooler, but.
Speaker 6 (27:46):
I'm more patient?
Speaker 8 (27:48):
Okay, I was gonna say patient in different ways, but yeah,
that's pretty much.
Speaker 4 (27:53):
Yeah, we kind of have the same answer with that one.
Speaker 8 (27:55):
Yeah, I feel like it generally speaking, I'm like, oh,
things are gonna work out.
Speaker 4 (27:59):
We don't have to worryorry about it.
Speaker 8 (28:00):
Andy's like, but like then when something happens in front
of me where it's like I'm waiting on like I
can't get the TV to work, it's like fuck it,
you know what I mean, And I'm just like I'll
move on. To the next thing and I'll watch whatever
I wanted to watch later. You know, Andy will like
stop and fix the TV. He'll read the instructions all
(28:22):
of that.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
Yeah, and final question, do you do you look?
Speaker 5 (28:26):
Do you gaze into the.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
Eyes of your daughter and you're like, I don't know,
one day you're going to be a ballerina or one
day you're going to anything.
Speaker 8 (28:35):
I just like gaze into her eyes and I'm like,
I don't care what you are. I just love you
so much. I like can't wait to see Yeah, yeah,
she's so cool.
Speaker 5 (28:46):
Rosebud Baker.
Speaker 1 (28:47):
Everybody, thank you, that is our show. Everybody be ground
of applots for all the comics you saw to that.
Speaker 5 (29:00):
Hey, gouch a pleasure. I'm off your eyes for tonight.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
Everybody, Happy Mother's Day and thank you so much for listening.
Thank you so much to everybody at the Moontower Comedy
Festival and the audience.
Speaker 3 (29:12):
That came to that show six pm. People showed up.
Pass this episode along to a friend.
Speaker 1 (29:17):
And next week I have another special Mother's Day episode
with Laura Prepond. That's right, she's currently directing episodes of
that nineties show You're Not Gonna Want To miss it
if you haven't yet subscribed to this podcast. There's so
many great episodes that you do not want to miss
and then you know what, while you're doing that, just
keep going stop by Apple Podcasts.
Speaker 3 (29:38):
Give us a rating post review. It does really help us.
I mean five stars really helps us. Let's be honest.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, Facebook at Parenting is a Joke.
Speaker 3 (29:50):
On x we are at Parenting.
Speaker 1 (29:52):
Joke and we have a substack with do content every
week for you to read. It's very fun, different takes
on all of our tra tribulations being parents. Just go
to substack and search for Parenting is a Joke. Hey,
come see me live. I'm back in.
Speaker 3 (30:07):
New York this weekend.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
I'm a Gotham comedy club for a bunch of shows,
and coming up in June, We're going to be doing
another live podcast taping of this show in Hoboken, New Jersey.
Speaker 3 (30:19):
It's on June fourteenth at the Miles.
Speaker 1 (30:21):
Square Theater in Hoboken, New Jersey, So get your tickets now.
Go to Ofira Eisberg dot com for all of the information.
This episode is produced by me.
Speaker 3 (30:30):
And Julie Smith.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
Clem Our editor is Nina Porzuki. Our sound designer is
Tino Toby Mack. Our digital marketing is done by Laura Vogel.
Our video editor is Melissa Weiss. Our overqualified intern is
Jeffrey Kaufmin.
Speaker 1 (30:42):
Thanks to all of the engineers at Citybox and the
Parker Jazz Club in Austin, Texas, the organizers of the
Moontower Comedy Festival, and Sheila Kenny. I'll leave you with
a little bit more from the hilarious Andy Haynes.
Speaker 7 (30:58):
My mom had postpartum depression and when I was a
baby and she couldn't hold me without getting upset.
Speaker 6 (31:03):
And all I have to say about that is why
do I know that?
Speaker 7 (31:06):
Like?
Speaker 6 (31:06):
Who thought.
Speaker 7 (31:09):
I needed to know that I was a baby? I
wasn't like keeping score. I wasn't like day six. It's
a bitch hasn't held me?
Speaker 6 (31:20):
What the hell is going on?
Speaker 7 (31:23):
Yeah, it's weird also to be a dad, because I'm
like not a man, Like I'm male.
Speaker 6 (31:33):
That's not what I'm trying to say.
Speaker 7 (31:34):
But I'm not like a man, you know, Like when
we think of dads, we think of like dad, you know,
But I'm not like like I'll ask for help. That's
something I'll do. I'm in Texas. I've seen a lot
of guys. They won't ask for help down here. I
know the type, you know. I have friends that are men.
They'll never ask for help. They could be drowning. You'd
be like, do you need help? And they'd be like,
I'm not gay. You're like all right, all right, drown
(31:58):
on your own terms. Fine. They call that the strong,
silent type, and I'm loud and weak. And it's because
I had a nice dad. If you have a nice dad,
you will be kind of a bitch. I'm sorry to
break the news to you all. My friends that are men,
their dad's never spoke to them. Maybe once in a while,
wake them up at three am, tell them they're disappointed.
(32:18):
My dad will wake me up at three am and
be like, there's a meteor shower outside. I was like,
I'm gonna be a pussy, aren't I. He's like, yeah,
I get the telescope.
Speaker 6 (32:29):
I love you. Let's kiss on the lips until you're
eight years old.
I used to be chair, so I let them start
aping of sales fun pantos at joke. Hello listeners, this
is parenting is a joke. I'm a lunch of flat
seltzer and old triskets named Olfira Eisenberg. On the show,
we bring together stand up comedians to talk about their
(00:20):
creative careers and how they are.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Managing to work, create, and perform while also raising kids.
Speaker 1 (00:28):
How the fuck are they doing it? So We're just
days away from Mother's Day and I gotta.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
Say, I'm tired. Oh my god, I'm tired, and I
forget how I'm supposed to handle Mother's Day. Am I
supposed to lovingly spend it with my child? Or am
I supposed to intentionally plan things that.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Don't include my family to celebrate myself.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
You know what, I'm sick of my family, but I'm
also sick of me.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
Here's what I want.
Speaker 2 (00:56):
I want a deprivation tank experience four hours.
Speaker 3 (01:01):
I want to feel nothing.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Okay. One fun thing I did recently was the Moontower Festival.
Speaker 3 (01:10):
In Austin, Texas, AH.
Speaker 2 (01:12):
It was a great time and I also was able
to do a live version of this show at that festival.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
It was a blast.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
I talked to Andy Haynes and were Rosebud Baker. They
are fantastic comedians. They are married, they have a nine
month old daughter, and I recorded it and I bring
it to you here. By the way, I loved Rosebud's
reaction to my asking her how she's going to spend
her first Mother's Day?
Speaker 4 (01:37):
Am I is that? Do I have to plan that too?
Then no, I'm then I'm boycotting.
Speaker 5 (01:48):
Yeah, have to do.
Speaker 4 (01:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
So here's our live show from Austin, Texas. Right after
the break. Hello everybody, Oh my goodness, six pm in
(02:13):
torrential rainstorm.
Speaker 5 (02:15):
Thank you so much for coming. I didn't know anyone
was gonna show up. Look at this. It's amazing. Thank you,
thank you, thank you, thank you.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
Welcome.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
Also, I say six pm show because that is I
like a six pm show. I have to admit, yes,
you do too. And you know what I like a
six pm crowd. I'm not gonna lie I do because
I always feel like six pm crowd. There's I'm both
of the kinds of people that are in this crowd,
because some of you this is just your six pm.
(02:44):
You've got an eight, you've got a nine, you've got
a twelve you might be.
Speaker 5 (02:47):
Going till two am right there, all right?
Speaker 1 (02:49):
And others of you you are dead set in being.
Speaker 5 (02:53):
In bed at nine thirty. That's right.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
Yeah, you're both here. Welcome, welcome, all right, everybody. I
am going to bring up our next comic, one of
my favorites from New York. He's been on Comedy Central, HBO,
and here right now, put your hands together for Andy Heyn.
Speaker 6 (03:19):
Pharaoh Eisenberg. How is everybody you guys?
Speaker 7 (03:22):
Good? Nice? Nice, nice. I'm happy to be here. This
is exciting with all the parents.
Speaker 6 (03:34):
I'm a new dad. Yeah, I'm a new dad. That's exciting.
Speaker 7 (03:39):
She's thirteen. I decided to go home. She got good
grades this year. So no, she's a six month old.
I have a little six month old baby girl, and
it's fun to become a dad. I'm trying to be
a better person. That's something I'm like trying to learn
how to be better at My therapist said, I need
to improve myself talk. That's like she said, I need
(03:59):
to be nice to myself because the baby can pick
up on that, which is weird because like if the
baby sits up, she shits up her back. But apparently
she can also like read a room that's like another
you can see her heart beat through the top of
her head. But she's also very sensitive to vibe. So, yeah,
(04:20):
we did IVF. That's what we did. We did IVF.
It was pretty crazy. If you guys don't know, that's
not how we got pregnant. We got pregnant in the
old fashioned way. But we still did IVF, which was
a good investment of thirty thousand dollars. It's it's kind
of rough on guys too, because we have to jerk
off at the doctor's office, which I don't know. If
(04:41):
you guys know this, you're usually not supposed to do.
Usually they don't want you to do that. Usually they're like, hey,
don't do that, we told you about this before. Stop
making eye contact. And this time they wanted me to.
This time, I made an appointment. I've never made an
appointment to masturbate my entire life. I made a Google
Calendar event to jerk off, and then I got there
(05:04):
and they were like, get in here, creep. I had
them say that it's the only way I can get hard,
and then they did. They took me this little room,
and the little room is called like a donation room.
Nobody wants these donations. Uh, in the little room, it's
it's a It was a couch and a flat screen TV.
(05:26):
And the flat screen TV had apps on it. And
I didn't know you could do this. There was a
porn Hub app, which I know that's sensitive in Texas
right now, but but like, I didn't know you could
put porn ub on the home screen of your television,
just like letting everybody know where you're doing that. You
know what is crazy. I turned on the TV. It
was like Hulu, porn Hub, Disney Plus, and I masturbated
(05:49):
to Elsa. But that's because we were freezing our embryos,
so it seemed appropriate. All right, I've offended some of
you guys. Thank you very much. I'm Andy Haynes. You
guys have been good sport. I promise to be nicer.
I'll become a nicer dad soon.
Speaker 5 (06:06):
Any hates everybody got you?
Speaker 6 (06:10):
Do you want to be over here? Okay, I'm gonna
move farther away.
Speaker 5 (06:15):
It's so yeah, there you go.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
It's so interesting to think, I mean, because I have
never been in the situation where I'm obviously giving seamen.
But I've been told so many different things about what
is available to inspire you.
Speaker 7 (06:29):
Yeah, it's always uncomfortable. I can't imagine, because you know,
it's like awkward to go into the doctor's office to
do a lot of things. You know, even to pee
is kind of weird to like carry that little cup.
But then there's like a woman walking you back and
she knows you're about to jerk off. That's never something
you do in your life. Like I gave somebody insurance
(06:50):
and then they're like, all right, come this way, you
piece of shit, and then they don't use like medical porn.
Speaker 6 (06:58):
But it's just the porn.
Speaker 7 (07:00):
Yeah, it's not like Glacko Smith Klimb porn.
Speaker 5 (07:09):
Becas corn.
Speaker 6 (07:10):
Yeah, exactly did you?
Speaker 2 (07:12):
Now?
Speaker 5 (07:12):
Did you always want to have kids?
Speaker 2 (07:14):
And for what?
Speaker 5 (07:14):
And I will just.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Say total assumption right now, I'm going to say any
that you strike me as someone who always wanted kids,
but I that is just me.
Speaker 6 (07:22):
No, I did.
Speaker 7 (07:23):
I was like, I was a ski instructor and a
summer camp counselor and we had foster kids growing up
my entire life.
Speaker 6 (07:31):
So I've changed.
Speaker 7 (07:32):
I changed about twenty thousand diapers before I turned eighteen,
Are you kidding?
Speaker 6 (07:36):
Yeah? So I kind of wanted to keep I loved
just doing it so much.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
You're like, wow, you were nineteen just being like you
know what I miss.
Speaker 6 (07:46):
I was in college and I was like, how's it going.
Speaker 7 (07:51):
Yeah, it's It's funny though, because my daughter is like,
you know, like she's six months, so she's like coming
online and she's got a new thing where she'll wake
up from a nap and she's a very gassy baby
and she'll turn over and fart and then start laughing.
Speaker 6 (08:07):
It's pretty it's pretty amazing.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
I remember I was, you know, I had this thing
where I was like, my baby's doing everything earlier than
other babies, which was wrong. And I remember being in
an appointment with the pediatrician and I was like, he's
already smiling. I know that's not really a thing that
happens yet, and he was like.
Speaker 5 (08:24):
That's gas. There you go.
Speaker 7 (08:30):
Did you find the thing with the pediatrician where they
would never tell you definitives like with things.
Speaker 5 (08:36):
Oh, like they're dodging a lawsuit.
Speaker 6 (08:38):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 7 (08:40):
Like our daughter got this thing called impetigo, which is
like a staph infection and it's pretty common or whatever.
But then it was also our fault. We brought her
to Florida, and but we were like is it okay?
And he's like, yeah, I think she's gonna be all right.
And we were like is she okay and he's like probably, yeah, right.
Speaker 6 (09:00):
You know.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
I remember actually calling my pediatrician at a normal time,
was in the middle of a night, with something like
three in the afternoon, and I was like, okay, he's
able to you know, all the thing about it used
to be you could put them on their back, and
then it was on the front, which way you have
your baby fall asleep, and so it was all about
the back, and you.
Speaker 5 (09:16):
Would I mean, I don't know if you have had
to deal with that.
Speaker 1 (09:20):
There's like a weighted there are little weighted suits you
put them in and then they just look like you
know there, they just look like they're like weird splayed lobsters.
Speaker 7 (09:30):
On the Yeah, we had we had one of those,
the starfish. Yes, but we also gave our baby weights
because we wanted to.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
So I was like, oh, he's he's strong enough now
to go on his stomach, so I'm not going to
wake up every five minutes to check what should I do?
Speaker 5 (09:47):
And she literally went.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
Yeah, that sounds, don't I don't know. I was like,
is that your medical answer?
Speaker 2 (09:54):
You don't know?
Speaker 5 (09:55):
And she was like, well, I guess you could get up.
Speaker 8 (09:57):
God.
Speaker 5 (10:00):
Yeah, so you know what I did nothing? Yeah, yeah,
I did nothing.
Speaker 7 (10:05):
It's hard because my wife is next so I don't
want to give away too much of her stuff. But
she's got a good story about the pediatrician. Hey, Rosie,
tell that joke the pediatrician did.
Speaker 5 (10:15):
Let me so let me ask you this. How freaked
out were you?
Speaker 1 (10:18):
I mean you're within the first six months, but how
freaked out were you within the first week. Since you
had a lot of babies around you, I feel like
you were probably pretty calm about them.
Speaker 7 (10:28):
I got weird, irrational fears about like I would like
go outside to get Rosie smoothie, and I would like
touch a door, and then I would come back and
I'd make the baby a bottle, and then I'd be like, that.
Speaker 6 (10:39):
Was New York door.
Speaker 7 (10:41):
I touched fair enough, you know, But it was like
it started before that. I remember one time I made
her like miso soup and I put kimchi in it,
and then she ate it, and then I was like,
I think the Kimchie's old, and then I.
Speaker 6 (10:54):
Was like, the Kimchie's gonna kill them both. And I
didn't say anything. I just didn't sleep that night.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
And do you mention that you were a professional skier,
So what does that mean? Were you you were a
competitive skier?
Speaker 7 (11:09):
Yeah, I mean I tried. I was an unprofessional professional skier.
I found out I was an alcoholic midway through that process.
That's what happens when real quick story. I moved to
Tahoe no plan, went to junior college at night, but
had no idea what I was where I was going
to live. Yeah, and I was with four other eighteen
year olds and we'd go to rent a house and
(11:30):
they'd be like, you can fuck right off. No, and
so we lived in a motel and then we got
a house eventually that was twenty miles from civilization. So
you know, you you have to become an alcoholic at
that point.
Speaker 6 (11:42):
I think it's kind of the rule.
Speaker 5 (11:43):
I was just wondering too, if, like you are dealing
with injuries from.
Speaker 7 (11:47):
Skiing, Yeah, I have like a broken disk at the
base of my spine and both my knees are torn apart.
Speaker 6 (11:52):
And it's a great sport.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
I love it, so I mean, some people who are
skiers are very feel, very strongly about it.
Speaker 5 (11:59):
We're going to our little kid on skis as soon
as they walk.
Speaker 7 (12:02):
Yeah, I'm not. I'm going to just put her on
a mono ski and just center now. Yeah yeah, now
I'd like her to ski. But the East Coast sucks.
Speaker 5 (12:11):
Oh wow, yeah yeah. Well, I mean, I'm from Canada,
so I'm with you.
Speaker 7 (12:15):
But yeah, you know, so I can't believe you totally
these people. You're from Canada, We're in Texas. Cut She's
from Alberta, the Texas of Canada.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
It is true. Yeah, we're closer than you think. I
grew up with a lot of people from Dallas around
me because they come up for the rodeo or the
oil or the oil. Yeah they said the rodeo.
Speaker 5 (12:34):
But now I understand what was really going on.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
And you are really into I'll say, like English soccer,
but football.
Speaker 6 (12:42):
Yes, yes, the beautiful game.
Speaker 5 (12:44):
And you work in that sometimes I do.
Speaker 7 (12:48):
I've worked in a little bit of football media, soccer media.
Speaker 6 (12:51):
I know.
Speaker 7 (12:51):
Sorry, you guys are get confused by the football. But
I got a job in England. For all of twenty
twenty two, I worked in London, what's your team? My
team that I did not work for because that would
have been a good job was is Arsenal. That's like
the team I scored the most him. There we go,
a couple of people coming along. Let's go Gooner's all right,
big win today? Tottenham Hotspur the shit because there's a chant.
(13:16):
How do you feel about Tottenham?
Speaker 6 (13:17):
Shit? How do you feel about shit Tottenham?
Speaker 5 (13:20):
That's the chance. Yeah, I fucking love them.
Speaker 6 (13:22):
Yeah, they're pretty beautiful.
Speaker 1 (13:24):
And so have you do people send you like little
jerseys or hats for your kids that say Arsenal.
Speaker 7 (13:30):
She's got an entire, like week's wardrobe of Arsenal stuff.
Speaker 6 (13:34):
Yeah, it's pretty amazing.
Speaker 1 (13:35):
Yeah, sat her in front of the I mean, she's
not watching television.
Speaker 6 (13:39):
She's watched a lot of games. I don't know if
she cares, but she's watched a lot of games.
Speaker 7 (13:44):
You know, like you know when you when you stop
being a good parent because you haven't slept for four days. Yeah,
she went on sleep strike a couple of weeks ago,
And it just happened to be that the game was early,
and I just put her in that biorn bouncer and
I laid on the couch for the whole game.
Speaker 1 (13:59):
Doing that is a number one dad. Move right there.
That is a number one dad, right there? Yeah, all right, Andy,
thank you so much. I'm gonna have you to come
back on after Rosie's done to sell you.
Speaker 7 (14:15):
Now, okay, awesome, thank you guys.
Speaker 1 (14:25):
Hey, we're back from the break back to our live
taping of Parenting as a Joke in Austin, Texas at
the Moontower Festival. So on our show, we had stand
up from the hilarious Rosebud Baker. But to hear those jokes,
you'll have to wait for her comedy.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
Special coming out later this year.
Speaker 1 (14:43):
But I did talk to her on stage, and one
thing she revealed in her stand up is that during
her pregnancy she had to deal with something called SPD,
which is symphysis pubis dysfunction.
Speaker 5 (14:56):
I had never heard about it before, but it's.
Speaker 1 (14:58):
Incredibly common and per usual, not often talked about. So
this is an uncomfortable set of symptoms caused by a
stiffness in your pelvic joints. As if being pregnant was
not uncomfortable enough, she had to deal with this, So
I reference that right at the beginning of our conversation.
(15:18):
So here it is back to our conversation at the
Moontower Festival with rosebud Baker.
Speaker 3 (15:23):
I know you're gonna love it. I am so pleased
to bring on our next comic.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
She also, as you found out, that she is married
to Andy, who was just here, so it's great to
have two parent comics on a show. She's a writer
for Saturday Night Live. And also she has a new
comedy special that she is finishing that you'll be able
to enjoy very soon. But here for you right now,
rosebud Baker, everybody, thank you.
Speaker 4 (15:53):
Where do I stand? Do I stand in the middle?
Speaker 5 (15:55):
So where everyone's casual?
Speaker 4 (15:56):
Okay?
Speaker 1 (15:57):
But hey, I did not know that you had to
experience what's the acronym that you just spd?
Speaker 8 (16:03):
SPD Still don't know what it stands for, but yeah,
got the word pubic is in there, so I just
try not to say it, of course.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Yeah, and I'm sorry. So how how long did that
was that an issue for you?
Speaker 5 (16:16):
It was?
Speaker 4 (16:16):
I was diagnosed with it.
Speaker 8 (16:18):
I felt it first at twenty weeks, and then by
thirty weeks I was in so much pain I couldn't
like roll over in bed anymore. So yeah, it was
it was like, I think I got diagnosed around thirty.
Speaker 5 (16:32):
Weeks, but I saw you doing shows.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Yeah, so you were just doing that through, yeah, appreciating pain.
Speaker 8 (16:38):
Yeah yeah, yeah, just pushing through. It's good practice for parenting,
you know. It's that's pretty much my life now, so right, yeah,
just in a different way.
Speaker 4 (16:48):
I'm just like, I'm in hell, what's going on?
Speaker 8 (16:50):
Yeah, we gotta get something done.
Speaker 5 (16:53):
Did you always want kids? No?
Speaker 4 (16:55):
I was really torn about it.
Speaker 8 (16:57):
Yeah, I was really like up and down about it
when we when we did IVF, I was like, oh, well,
this will buy me some time to decide, you know,
if I want to actually have kids, you know, and
because it was like it's like torturing yourself being like, oh,
I'm running out of time and I don't know, and
(17:19):
you know, so I was like, let's do IVF and
we did it and it was it was fine. I mean,
it was a walk in the park compared to pregnancy.
But yeah, so that was kind of like it happened.
Speaker 4 (17:30):
Yeah, we got.
Speaker 8 (17:31):
Actually got pregnant, like raw dog in it when I
had COVID like two months later. So yeah, she's not
her best work, but she's she's a little dumb but
she's strong. You know, she's a survivor.
Speaker 5 (17:50):
I'm just gonna do great.
Speaker 4 (17:51):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Lead When you were pregnant before, obviously you had to
deal with just like the actual issue of the pubic
pelvis situation.
Speaker 8 (18:00):
Are you one of the police. Don't call it that ever. Yeah? Yeah?
Speaker 7 (18:07):
Did you?
Speaker 1 (18:07):
Were you Like, I'm not gonna eat sushi. I'm not
gonna eat soft cheese. I'm not gonna have salad at
a restaurant.
Speaker 4 (18:13):
No, I ate everything.
Speaker 8 (18:15):
I mean, I I don't really eat that much anyway,
Like I kind of I don't. I'm a very picky eater.
So anything that they were like, they were like, don't
eat fish. I was like, I don't eat fish. They
look the same dead as they do alive. I don't
want them.
Speaker 4 (18:29):
I don't.
Speaker 8 (18:30):
They were like, don't eat uh, I don't know whatever.
Else they were like soft cheeses. Yeah, that kind of
just didn't really appeal to me. I just ate like
bags and bags of frozen cherries, and I would yeah,
and you know, typical like weird pregnant stuff where I'd
like buy a watermelon, cut it in half and just.
Speaker 4 (18:49):
Eat it with a spoon and then yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:53):
Okay, and you know how the first whatever you're you're
dealing what I called handbag phase because you can walk
around with a baby in.
Speaker 4 (19:01):
Yes, but it's that's a perfect name for it. Yeah,
bag face.
Speaker 5 (19:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:06):
But you have this great joke where you talk about
Andy checking your work because he was the person that
felt like everything had, you know, just some danger.
Speaker 5 (19:15):
Yes, did you feel pretty relaxed?
Speaker 4 (19:16):
I feel totally relaxed.
Speaker 3 (19:18):
That's amazing.
Speaker 8 (19:18):
I mean I saw her, I was like, oh, this
is a fucking ox. I was like, she's sturdy as hell.
I was like, I don't know, she's gonna be fine.
She's built like Andy. I mean, well, like she's six
months old. And when I carry her around, I look
like I'm carrying Andy Like it's ridiculous.
Speaker 4 (19:36):
And I was always like, oh, I'm never going.
Speaker 8 (19:38):
To comment on my baby's weight or the shape of
my baby's body. But I'm like, god damn, look at her.
Like you when they come out, you're proud of it,
you know what I mean? Yeah, you're like, look at
this thing. Did the Petrician go like she's in the
blah blah? Well I had I had a planned C
section because I was like, no work for me, please,
I would like to lay back and sort of wake
(19:59):
up to a up at show.
Speaker 4 (20:00):
And that is what a sea section is.
Speaker 8 (20:03):
They just sort of pop, they go, look look what
mommy made, and and and so. I when I was
doing that, when I was having the sea section, I
had a doctor who was like an Italian doctor, and
she was down there and you know, you're awake, so
you can kind of feel the table like jost selling
around and I was like, this feels like a lot
(20:24):
of movement, feels like aggressive, whatever's going on on the
other side of this.
Speaker 4 (20:29):
And I just heard her go.
Speaker 8 (20:31):
That's a big baby.
Speaker 4 (20:35):
It was like, we're gonna need a bigger boat, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 8 (20:37):
That's so I feel like that I knew when that happened.
Speaker 5 (20:42):
That's a good thing. Yeah. You have these incredible.
Speaker 1 (20:45):
Stories about being brought up as you were talking about
a Republican family and you as a kid went to
the White House numerous times.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
Is that right?
Speaker 4 (20:53):
Yeah? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (20:54):
Is there any part of that from your childhood that
you're like, I kind of would like.
Speaker 5 (20:59):
My kid to experience this.
Speaker 8 (21:01):
No, zero, no, Yeah, the White House is so born. Okay, So,
my my granddad was Secretary of State under George Bush
Senior and his name is James Baker. And yeah, and
so you know, I could have been in the Illuminati
and instead I do this. Yeah, I'm glad. You guys
(21:24):
are proud. They're not, they're not thrilled with it. But
I you know, going to the White House and all that.
I remember being a kid and going and being like, wait,
so this is a rental Like this is just a
rental home. And also it's kind of it's dark. It's
like Graceland, you know what I mean, Like everything's kind
(21:45):
of damp and old, and it feels haunted. And and
also you had to be on like your best behavior.
And I was like, add had all kinds of behavioral problems.
So like, you know, anytime we went to the White House,
I was like, oh god, we're going to like Granddad's
work again, and I have to act like someone I'm not.
(22:06):
And it was just like the work. It always I
always felt very out of place.
Speaker 4 (22:09):
Yeah, you know, with all the right yeahleas.
Speaker 5 (22:12):
For kids, doesn't seem like kids are running down the.
Speaker 8 (22:14):
Wad, right, I mean, you know, not like a comedy festival.
Is this is way better. I'm doing things different.
Speaker 5 (22:23):
I love that you brought your daughter with you to
this comedy festival.
Speaker 1 (22:26):
Yeah, I mean part of me goes like I wish
you would normalize that, but also you need an incredible
amount of help just to.
Speaker 5 (22:32):
Make that happen.
Speaker 4 (22:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
So I did it a little bit too, And I
will tell you that the hardest thing I found was
the brain switch.
Speaker 5 (22:39):
I don't know if you experienced that.
Speaker 1 (22:40):
Like I was with my child and then all of
a sudden, I was like, now I've got to be
this person.
Speaker 5 (22:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 8 (22:46):
Yeah, I'm finding that it's actually like changing things for
me on stage. None of this is going to be funny,
but it's changing things for me on stage in a
way where it's like, I I do feel like a
different person now and I'm still me, but it's very
but I feel a lot softer. I feel like I'm
(23:08):
a woman for the first time, Like not because you know,
it's like you're as a stand up comic, You're you're
constantly trying to fit into a world of men. Even
though there's a lot of women comics now, and but
there's sort of a every female comic has kind of
a masculine energy, and it's because we're we have to
fit into this other world of like middle aged men
(23:32):
and uh, and so getting pregnant was like, oh, this
is gonna throw a wrench in all of the character
structure that I've kind of built up for myself. And
I think it's becoming really interesting for me because I'm like, oh,
what would happen if I was just me on stage?
Speaker 4 (23:49):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 8 (23:50):
And that's and stuff is happening. I'm getting jokes that
I never would have told before. I'm mining my life
for material in ways that I know ever did, and
hopefully it ends up being all funny.
Speaker 4 (24:04):
But either way, it's interesting, you know.
Speaker 1 (24:08):
So, yes, the identity shifts, so most people feel like
they really struggle with that who am I now?
Speaker 5 (24:13):
But to kind of use it to actually help you creatively.
Speaker 8 (24:16):
Right, I mean, not knowing is a very creative place
to be in, right. It's like being certain is kind
of the death of creativity.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
So yeah, yeah, And I saw that you have a
big tour coming up and you your tour poster is
you with your baby?
Speaker 5 (24:34):
Is that accurate that you were taking your child with
you on tour?
Speaker 4 (24:37):
Yeah? Yeah?
Speaker 5 (24:38):
Really, yeah, amazing.
Speaker 8 (24:40):
Yeah, I'm really excited. I'm really excited. I mean I
want to bring her over. She's awesome. Yeah, she's my
favorite person.
Speaker 5 (24:47):
So and speak, this is gonna be your first Mother's
Day in just a couple of weeks?
Speaker 4 (24:50):
Is it in a couple of weeks?
Speaker 5 (24:52):
Yeah? Like three or a month whatever.
Speaker 4 (24:54):
We didn't even think about that. Yeah, that is that's true.
Speaker 5 (24:57):
Do you know any do you want? Do you have
an idea of what you want to do?
Speaker 4 (24:59):
Or am I is that? Do I have to plan
that too?
Speaker 1 (25:05):
Usually, I mean classically they stick you with the kids
and they take off.
Speaker 4 (25:11):
Then no, I'm then I'm boycotting.
Speaker 1 (25:17):
Yeah, you have to do Yeah, Andy, and you as
people dealing with this, I found out when my husband
and I would do really approach projects differently when we
had to take care of a child.
Speaker 5 (25:28):
Yes, what do you guys approach differently?
Speaker 8 (25:30):
Oh my god, it's like every I don't even know.
I don't even know where to start because it's like
even coming here right like I we were, we got
enough fight coming here because the rain was happening and
there wasn't a pick up for us, and he wanted
to call an uber and I was like, everything's gonna
be fine, like the car's gonna come, and he was like, well,
we you know, and he has a really he has
(25:52):
a really good point, which is like, what if it
doesn't work out, you know what I mean. But I'm
always like, it's gonna work out. It's fine, everything's gonna be.
We're gonna get there. What's what are they going to
start the show without comics there?
Speaker 6 (26:04):
You know?
Speaker 8 (26:04):
I but it's like, I you know, but that's also
like a selfish you know, so I'm an I'm kind
of the asshole most of the time. I do find that,
like I am the asshole in most of our arguments.
Although I am not the first to admit that it
(26:29):
won't matter they can record it, You're still gonna be
the first to apologize.
Speaker 5 (26:33):
It's not the weirdest couple therapies, lack of sleep.
Speaker 4 (26:40):
Me me, oh yeah, for sure.
Speaker 8 (26:43):
I mean I worked at SNL for three years before
I had a baby, so it's literally the same thing.
It's just it's like it's psychological torture and uh and
you just have to sort of maintain uh uh you
just got to get shit done, you know.
Speaker 4 (26:59):
So it's like I learned how to do that.
Speaker 5 (27:01):
That's amazing.
Speaker 8 (27:02):
Yeah, I've said to everybody at US and L I'm like,
you've already done it, Like if aside from the breastfeeding portion,
I'm like, you guys have got it, you know, if
you've got a kid and you work at us now,
it's like you're already not.
Speaker 4 (27:14):
Sleeping, so why not?
Speaker 5 (27:16):
Yeah, just keep going?
Speaker 4 (27:17):
Yeah, not keep humanity going while you're out at life.
Speaker 5 (27:20):
Who's more patient you were? Andy?
Speaker 8 (27:25):
I think I was gonna say Andy, but it's also
like we're patient in different ways. I feel like he
could help answer this question, but I because I don't
know how to answer it, like fully.
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Andy, who's more patient you were? Rosebud? Rosebud's Rosebud's cooler, but.
Speaker 6 (27:46):
I'm more patient?
Speaker 8 (27:48):
Okay, I was gonna say patient in different ways, but yeah,
that's pretty much.
Speaker 4 (27:53):
Yeah, we kind of have the same answer with that one.
Speaker 8 (27:55):
Yeah, I feel like it generally speaking, I'm like, oh,
things are gonna work out.
Speaker 4 (27:59):
We don't have to worryorry about it.
Speaker 8 (28:00):
Andy's like, but like then when something happens in front
of me where it's like I'm waiting on like I
can't get the TV to work, it's like fuck it,
you know what I mean, And I'm just like I'll
move on. To the next thing and I'll watch whatever
I wanted to watch later. You know, Andy will like
stop and fix the TV. He'll read the instructions all
(28:22):
of that.
Speaker 1 (28:22):
Yeah, and final question, do you do you look?
Speaker 5 (28:26):
Do you gaze into the.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
Eyes of your daughter and you're like, I don't know,
one day you're going to be a ballerina or one
day you're going to anything.
Speaker 8 (28:35):
I just like gaze into her eyes and I'm like,
I don't care what you are. I just love you
so much. I like can't wait to see Yeah, yeah,
she's so cool.
Speaker 5 (28:46):
Rosebud Baker.
Speaker 1 (28:47):
Everybody, thank you, that is our show. Everybody be ground
of applots for all the comics you saw to that.
Speaker 5 (29:00):
Hey, gouch a pleasure. I'm off your eyes for tonight.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
Everybody, Happy Mother's Day and thank you so much for listening.
Thank you so much to everybody at the Moontower Comedy
Festival and the audience.
Speaker 3 (29:12):
That came to that show six pm. People showed up.
Pass this episode along to a friend.
Speaker 1 (29:17):
And next week I have another special Mother's Day episode
with Laura Prepond. That's right, she's currently directing episodes of
that nineties show You're Not Gonna Want To miss it
if you haven't yet subscribed to this podcast. There's so
many great episodes that you do not want to miss
and then you know what, while you're doing that, just
keep going stop by Apple Podcasts.
Speaker 3 (29:38):
Give us a rating post review. It does really help us.
I mean five stars really helps us. Let's be honest.
Speaker 1 (29:46):
Follow us on Instagram, TikTok, Facebook at Parenting is a Joke.
Speaker 3 (29:50):
On x we are at Parenting.
Speaker 1 (29:52):
Joke and we have a substack with do content every
week for you to read. It's very fun, different takes
on all of our tra tribulations being parents. Just go
to substack and search for Parenting is a Joke. Hey,
come see me live. I'm back in.
Speaker 3 (30:07):
New York this weekend.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
I'm a Gotham comedy club for a bunch of shows,
and coming up in June, We're going to be doing
another live podcast taping of this show in Hoboken, New Jersey.
Speaker 3 (30:19):
It's on June fourteenth at the Miles.
Speaker 1 (30:21):
Square Theater in Hoboken, New Jersey, So get your tickets now.
Go to Ofira Eisberg dot com for all of the information.
This episode is produced by me.
Speaker 3 (30:30):
And Julie Smith.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
Clem Our editor is Nina Porzuki. Our sound designer is
Tino Toby Mack. Our digital marketing is done by Laura Vogel.
Our video editor is Melissa Weiss. Our overqualified intern is
Jeffrey Kaufmin.
Speaker 1 (30:42):
Thanks to all of the engineers at Citybox and the
Parker Jazz Club in Austin, Texas, the organizers of the
Moontower Comedy Festival, and Sheila Kenny. I'll leave you with
a little bit more from the hilarious Andy Haynes.
Speaker 7 (30:58):
My mom had postpartum depression and when I was a
baby and she couldn't hold me without getting upset.
Speaker 6 (31:03):
And all I have to say about that is why
do I know that?
Speaker 7 (31:06):
Like?
Speaker 6 (31:06):
Who thought.
Speaker 7 (31:09):
I needed to know that I was a baby? I
wasn't like keeping score. I wasn't like day six. It's
a bitch hasn't held me?
Speaker 6 (31:20):
What the hell is going on?
Speaker 7 (31:23):
Yeah, it's weird also to be a dad, because I'm
like not a man, Like I'm male.
Speaker 6 (31:33):
That's not what I'm trying to say.
Speaker 7 (31:34):
But I'm not like a man, you know, Like when
we think of dads, we think of like dad, you know,
But I'm not like like I'll ask for help. That's
something I'll do. I'm in Texas. I've seen a lot
of guys. They won't ask for help down here. I
know the type, you know. I have friends that are men.
They'll never ask for help. They could be drowning. You'd
be like, do you need help? And they'd be like,
I'm not gay. You're like all right, all right, drown
(31:58):
on your own terms. Fine. They call that the strong,
silent type, and I'm loud and weak. And it's because
I had a nice dad. If you have a nice dad,
you will be kind of a bitch. I'm sorry to
break the news to you all. My friends that are men,
their dad's never spoke to them. Maybe once in a while,
wake them up at three am, tell them they're disappointed.
(32:18):
My dad will wake me up at three am and
be like, there's a meteor shower outside. I was like,
I'm gonna be a pussy, aren't I. He's like, yeah,
I get the telescope.
Speaker 6 (32:29):
I love you. Let's kiss on the lips until you're
eight years old.
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