I Got My Own Trench Coat FT. Kiki Said So

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
So I think it's circumstantial. So I think if it's
the first time y'all had sex and he didn't make
unfortunately though it is a body, it is a body.
But like if like I'm having sex with my man
and he before me, they didn't count, get me some more.
You see what I'm saying. So like if he said, oh, man,
we just had sex this morning, no we did not.

(00:20):
I didn't finish. But if it's like the first time,
you can't say, oh, me and him never had sex?
Why No? I mean you were there and see it?
Were you there?

Speaker 2 (00:28):
You can so unless it was a time where I
had a third party witness, maybe I don't care what
y'all said.

Speaker 1 (00:33):
There's no proof. What's up? Y'all's your girl? Lex p Andy,

(01:00):
Sugar and cold and you are to an end to
another episode of poor Mind where mind speaks overthought. We
gotta guess today. We gotta guess today.

Speaker 3 (01:14):
So het you having to do intros episodes where with
our friends because I'm like, is kinky? We could just
have a ball to be professional?

Speaker 1 (01:25):
Yes, because I got there intro. You know they love
the intro. Let me get my and they don't know me.
They know y'all. Hello, I need some help girls.

Speaker 3 (01:35):
Shut up girl, because.

Speaker 1 (01:42):
Let me do it what I do here you Okay,
So let me say this. First of all, this is
our girl. Y'all know we talk about her so much
on the show, and this is one of I really
will say this when it comes to black women in
this space of podcasting. I can truly say she is
a pineer and o G of the podcasting space. When

(02:03):
I say, when I first met you, it was so
inspirational to me. I learned so much from you, you
know what I'm saying. So we gonna give her her
flowers and give her her respect, Miss entrepreneur, a producer, director, writer,
a podcast queen, the certified not for herself, Miss sets Up.

(02:30):
That was so beautiful, you know what.

Speaker 2 (02:32):
I'm ready to come out wrappers.

Speaker 3 (02:36):
And you did have a track you did did.

Speaker 1 (02:41):
Drip and you drip need to put the link in
the added to your story. Yes, So let me just
say I think we can all speak for this, like
when we say, like, come into work, especially when you
have like guests and you got to be professional. You
have to and you know you gotta turn it on.

(03:01):
So one thing that I love I love when we
have these episodes of people who are friends in real life.
It's like we've been to have a ball. Yeah, this
is what poor minds is about.

Speaker 2 (03:09):
It's less pressure, you not to worry about pulling teeth
with conversations.

Speaker 1 (03:14):
I love it too.

Speaker 3 (03:14):
We don't have to worry about if we don't have
good chemistry or missues.

Speaker 1 (03:18):
You already know the vibe. Yeah, the VIBESU. So Kiki,
just for you know, the younger because we have a
young crowd now the girls tuning in, So for the
younger people, can you just tell us you know about cocktails?
Gives us a little history, you know about who you
are and with Kiki said something, yeah, so cocktails.

Speaker 2 (03:37):
Jerry Discussions is a podcast that I started almost ten
years ago, and it was it started off as just
one a way for me to create an opportunity for myself.
I went to school, I had plans to be like
on radio and television, hosting and doing things like that,
and I wasn't getting the opportunities I wanted. So I
started to show and what better to talk about than

(03:57):
my jacked up love life?

Speaker 1 (03:59):
Right?

Speaker 2 (04:00):
And it was just like I was going on bad days.
I was in very crazy situations and a lot of
times I was just in it for the plot, but
you can't really say that in the moment anyway, fys forward.
I come up with the idea to start a podcast
after listening to the Ready, and I just kept going
and kept going. I went through a few lineup changes,

(04:20):
and now I have a co host who has been
with me since twenty seventeen, and we just talk about
our love lives, relationships, sex lives over drinks and it's
just supposed to be funny and like I mean, sometimes
we be crying and sometimes it's serious, but it's really
just supposed to be look at the life that you
live and the choices that you make and find a

(04:40):
way to laugh at it. I was talking to everyone earlier.
I was like, you know, when people write in for advice,
because we do advice as well, it's kind of like are.

Speaker 4 (04:48):
They hoping for real advice? Like you need to seek
better help?

Speaker 1 (04:51):
Right, I'm cracking.

Speaker 2 (04:54):
For my because we are like making a lot of
this and this is for entertainment. But sometimes now and again,
I feel like people really do need help, and I
have to remind myself that, like people are tuned in
and especially like anyone who found us are stuck with
us through the pandemic. People don't be having friends in
real life, you know, for whatever reason, and sometimes it's

(05:15):
those online connections you have.

Speaker 1 (05:16):
So when they seem like they might do something.

Speaker 2 (05:18):
Crazy, I'll go ahead and give real advice, but usually
like it's just if you want to hear a funny response.
And then I've been doing that since well launched in
twenty sixteen, and so here we are in twenty twenty
five and still going.

Speaker 1 (05:33):
And then on June.

Speaker 2 (05:36):
Seventeenth, I was trying to remember the day. I have
a new podcast called the Xoman Podcast that is launching.
I'm really excited about that one. That one is different.
I am interviewing people.

Speaker 1 (05:47):
And I'm it's not gonna be so serious to.

Speaker 4 (05:49):
Where you won't be entertained, but it's definitely a more serious.

Speaker 1 (05:51):
No, I'm just.

Speaker 2 (05:52):
Kiera Walker because I mean business when I come in there,
and we need to get to the root of how
they're feeling and what's going on. No more of the
as a man you should, as a woman you should.
I just want the black man to feel safe and
open up. I got them crying and everything. Oh I
love it and I can't wait. And some of them
real fun, y'all just need I mean.

Speaker 1 (06:09):
Just want Fine, I'm so vulnerable, I got you, go ahead,
go ahead.

Speaker 3 (06:17):
So do you ever consider yourself now like an OG podcaster?

Speaker 4 (06:21):
Yeah, and sometimes I just consider myself.

Speaker 2 (06:23):
Oh yes, yes, the way those needs be cracking and stuff.
But yes, I do feel like I'm an OG podcaster.
I am so old with the podcasting. It's like before
all of these platforms popped up, before everybody was rushing
to do video and setting it up because we started
off with just audio and the industry has changed a lot.

(06:46):
But I love what I do as far as hosting,
I love producing.

Speaker 1 (06:52):
I want to do more of that.

Speaker 2 (06:54):
I am really passionate about creating content and finding different
ways to tell stories.

Speaker 1 (06:59):
I love it. But yeah, I'm and I don't plan
to go anywhere. Yeah, and I think I know you
have like a breath of fresh air because I know
doing your show, like you said, you get to interview,
so it's not I don't got to talk about me
my business. That's probably my favorite. Oh my god, don't
get it too, pour minds is my shit. Yeah. When

(07:20):
I get to be on Love Lexpeen, I get to
talk about y'all. It's different. I don't got to talk
about me and what I got going on, so I
know you just have like a breath of fresh air
with that. It is nice. So kind of piggybacking off
of what Drea said too, like how do you feel
about the podcasting game when you first got into it
versus now?

Speaker 4 (07:40):
It was like being out in the wild wild West.
I was cowgirl walker if I will. Okay, there wasn't
a lot of direction.

Speaker 2 (07:48):
There weren't a ton of people trying to teach you
to show you. It was just kind of winging it
a lot of the ways. And fortunately for me, I
had that background in broadcasting already knew how to do
all of it editing, I knew about a lot of
stuff from the jump.

Speaker 1 (08:02):
I needed to refine those skills. Don't get me wrong,
but I knew about it. It was different.

Speaker 2 (08:07):
I felt like it was less pressure. Yeah, less pressure
is probably the biggest thing. You don't have people in
the comments or leaving reviews telling you how to do
what you do when they don't do it.

Speaker 1 (08:22):
And sometimes it's like I know that people want to.

Speaker 2 (08:25):
Be helpful or whatever they feel, maybe they just do
feel like talking shit. You know, I get it, but
you don't know, and so like just shut up. Sometimes
that wasn't a thing. And then like the pressure to
look put.

Speaker 4 (08:36):
Together out of bed.

Speaker 2 (08:38):
You aren't gonna see me. You're gonna see the same
picture that I took a year ago, and that was
just gonna be it. It's just different. And then I
see a lot of like people regurgitating the same things
over and over again and the same things and doing
things for clickbait.

Speaker 1 (08:53):
That's the part I don't like.

Speaker 3 (08:54):
Yeah, yeah, like days and I agree with one hundred percent,
because at one point we were like that too, Like
we always pretty much had the visual element, but at
one point we just didn't give it them, Like.

Speaker 1 (09:08):
We just used to roll out of bed yeah and record.
I mean we did. I know, They're like, we know la,
we know well, I will.

Speaker 3 (09:19):
Say, but even with me, like I definitely I feel
like I never just rolled out of bed to record,
but I definitely put way more effort in now. Like
I used to be repeating you, I was gonna wear
the same.

Speaker 1 (09:33):
I didn't give it them.

Speaker 3 (09:34):
Who cares because we're sitting in my apartment record and
we just give me all the content. Now I feel like,
you know, we have to pull up, we have to
be polished, we have to have a cute outfit on.
Hair gotta be done, makeup gotta be tea, everything has
to be together because all of those elements matter when
it comes to somebody clicking on the video, which is
something we're back in the day, Like you said that

(09:55):
shit did not matter if the content was good and
it was funny word of mouth. People hear about the podcast,
they're gonna watch it. Now all of these other things
are affected that you know, there needs to be a factor.

Speaker 1 (10:05):
Bick. Yeah, it looks really good on you and your hair,
the style. I'm loving it down, thank you. But I
say that to say because I just made a video
on TikTok and it got it kind of got a
little traction because I was saying, let's bring brack favorite outfits,
let's bring that repeating outfits. If I buy something, I
want to be able to wear it, you know, three

(10:26):
four times a month sometimes let me repeat myself. But no,
I said that, and it was so many people in
the comments like we never stopped. Why do you care?
Why do you care? And I have to explain people
because I'm not known in the TikTok world. I said, hey,
I have a platform, not on TikTok, but on YouTube.
If I wear something too much, they're gonna be like,
let's you got that on again? Lex? What you got on?

(10:46):
And I feel like, do y'all feel that pressure? Like
cause I know me and you. Sometimes I will call
Dre and I'll be like, Dre, did I wear this already? Like?
Did I have that on already?

Speaker 5 (10:54):
So?

Speaker 1 (10:55):
How do you feel about repeating outfits? Oh? I'm gonna
do it each and every time. I don't give a
good content.

Speaker 2 (11:00):
Yes on cocky wearing my favorite outfits now not multiple
times a month because the week. But yeah, but I
am gonna repeat my eye bought them, and I'm I'm
gonna wear it until these fashion novaseems. But okay, I'm
about three times in fashion. Yeah, but that's that's a

(11:21):
good thing about fast fashion, is like when you do
want to not wear the same thing, sometimes I will
try to mix it up.

Speaker 1 (11:27):
Or change my hair up.

Speaker 4 (11:28):
But I've been supposed to take these braids out.

Speaker 1 (11:30):
Yeah, okay, so we're just gonna see it.

Speaker 2 (11:32):
And I'm pretty sure I wore this on cocktails already,
so hello again.

Speaker 1 (11:35):
But I do try a little bit.

Speaker 2 (11:37):
But if I'm repeating something, I'm repeating it usually the
more casual fish.

Speaker 1 (11:40):
Yeah, that's my little away. I'm gonna repeat the outfit.
I don't give it in. Yeah, well, you don't repeat outfits.
I do very the real life.

Speaker 3 (11:52):
Yes, I do because I feel like, because I feel
like on a normal basis, I wear the same ship.

Speaker 1 (11:57):
Y'all are both of my friends. Y'all know.

Speaker 3 (11:59):
If y'all hit me up and y'all like, oh, let's
go to lunch, nine times out of ten, I'm gonna.

Speaker 1 (12:03):
Have on some ath leisure.

Speaker 3 (12:04):
Yeah, yeah, I wear the same clothes. Now, well, if
we talk about you stepping out, that's this.

Speaker 1 (12:10):
I'm on my same little dress. Bitch, you had that
on last week? Shut up girl. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (12:15):
I was mad this weekend because when I was packing,
I went to Dallas and I really wanted to wear
my favorite dress and it's not from fashion off so
I could get I can get more wears that up.
I was like, God, damn, every time I go somewhere
I want to put on the same outfit, I've got
to be stopped.

Speaker 1 (12:30):
Cause it's like good in it?

Speaker 3 (12:32):
Why not flattering, and I feel like now that I've
started investing in like cause I still love fast fashion,
don't get me wrong, but like, I definitely have started
investing in my wardrobe more over the past.

Speaker 1 (12:42):
I would say two three years.

Speaker 2 (12:44):
So certain outfits like yep, this cost me a couple
hundred dollars, you're gonna see it again. Okay, let me
say I'm spread or I'm a silly messed up so bad.
So when I recorded the last episode of Cocktails, when
I did that with y'all, I was like, Okay, this
is way before travel Queen.

Speaker 1 (13:00):
I'm safe. I'm but but then like y'all waited a
couple of weeks to drop it, so I had on
that same blue dress. They dropping Travel Queens clips with
my orange hair, Cocktails dropping clips with my black cat.
I got that same fuck ass blue dress on. I
remember the dress.

Speaker 2 (13:18):
That's what I'm saying. And you know it's funny. I
almost bought that dress and I was gonna wear it
that day. Got the same day, Yes, but I'm glad
my order didn't come in.

Speaker 1 (13:27):
I got it in orange too. I wore it on
uh we just did a bank show. I wore it
on bank show when I did it, so y'all gonna
see you again. I'm tired. I am tired when I
tell you I spend so much money just buying something
because I'm like, I don't want to repeat this. I
don't want to repeat this. So I feel like, honestly,
I'm about to start going back to the episodes from
like twenty twenty three, what I had on, bitch, it's

(13:48):
about time I run that dress I had on with
Crystal Renee. It's been about two years.

Speaker 2 (13:53):
Yeahs like the girls say we need to be doing
that anyway because we're flogging up the oceans or something. No,
we're doing something wrong because these these clothes don't degrade.

Speaker 4 (14:03):
It's just messed us up there in the.

Speaker 1 (14:05):
Little seal got on my little booty short.

Speaker 2 (14:08):
It's just taking up spade what I don't know, you
saving my clothes?

Speaker 1 (14:14):
SINGERL want to say the singer she said, a little steal,
oh on my booty shots not mas seal with some booty.

Speaker 3 (14:29):
I used to love me some time, keeople.

Speaker 1 (14:34):
That was my mama songs. And what was I singing about?

Speaker 4 (14:38):
Because I had to be in like kindergarten or something.

Speaker 6 (14:40):
I was little like y'all all steel, right, So she said,
what the fucking still, Oh my gosh, Okay, let me

(15:02):
tell y'all.

Speaker 1 (15:03):
Something real quick. Then we're gonna move on to the
first topic. Okay, I went to the park the other day, right, like,
we had a little family day at the park, and
I'm watching these men hoop. You know, men love to
go to the parking they do. They love to be like, yeah,
you know, hoop. I could have went to the lead,
but she told my achilles and she didn't have it
work out for me. Find you. These are the same
niggas that want to be online talking about angel Rees

(15:25):
and how she can't. Let me tell y'all I saw
y'all at the park, y'all cannot hope you fucking stink.
And it would be the same people that get online
and really feel like if they did a one on
one where angel reaes, they would beat her. I mean
they throwing up brick after a brick after brick. I said,
I'm teaching the laxy shoes up to show your eyes done.
It was so goddamn bad. I mean, I just think

(15:48):
the audacity sometimes and I don't want to make this
a man versus woman. Think but I think it's so
crazy that some men really think that y'all could take
a one on one with Angel Reese and win after
what I saw. Yeah, you know what I'm saying. I'm
talking about y'all niggas that be playing at the Wreck
and at the park. It wasn't given the Yeah boys
and Girls club. You know what I'm saying. You know

(16:10):
I was not in press, but y'all like, get the
eg if y'all seen your boot play at the park
and he couldn't.

Speaker 4 (16:17):
Hop yes, cause why am I even here?

Speaker 1 (16:19):
Ah? Why am I watching you play basketball? And you
can't do her? And you can't even play there's no snacks.

Speaker 4 (16:27):
You're supposed to take me to a basketball game?

Speaker 2 (16:29):
You know what I'm saying, there's a snowball truck or
yuess what I say?

Speaker 1 (16:33):
I love me an athletic man. I'm not saying you
gotta be you know Lebron James. But if you're going
out there, who don't embarrass me? Go have boy time,
Go have your guys time. This is a guy's night out.
Or why is you missing a lay up? Yeah? I
will say, if you're not good, don't invite me. Don't
invite me.

Speaker 3 (16:49):
Don't invite me because as soon as we get into it,
i'mna be like, yeah, And that's why y'all ass suck
at basketball. You wasn't getting no motherfucking shots. You was
right there. You couldn't even get the layers.

Speaker 1 (17:00):
Was looking like shap we get into it, I'm gonna
remind you follow the yellow brick road, Dorothy, get him
out of here. You know what I'm saying. It's vicious
and mean.

Speaker 2 (17:12):
I see I probably would have just got distracted and
left because it was gonna be boring.

Speaker 1 (17:16):
But that's all I'm saying. When but when he got
and we get home, See, I turned it to bring
it on. Yeah, I could be a gr Yes, it's
a leader.

Speaker 4 (17:27):
Back in the day, I could do that.

Speaker 1 (17:29):
You was a cheerleader. You know what's a good time.
I love a good observation. So yeah, man, y'all need
to kind of hush on the internet when it comes
to the woman athletes, the female athletes and things like that.
But y'all not You cannot get on a tennis court
with Serena. It's not happening. Just hush period when he
comes to we mean, that's what y'all need to do
shut up. Yep, Yeah, that's what we're gonna tell him.

(17:50):
Shut up, girl, because you sounded like a girl. You
talking about the girls, and you sounded like one too. Yah,
mind you be mind Yeah a business. Okay, So y'all
already get into the first job. Yes, so we didn't
even started. Look, we already deep in this thing. Y'all know,
we get the chatty go ahead, Drea.

Speaker 2 (18:10):
All right, So for the first topic, I really want
us to talk about. You know, do you feel like
your parents taught you how to date? Because I feel
like talking about dating in the black community, which your
parents was just so taboo.

Speaker 1 (18:24):
They used to make jokes.

Speaker 3 (18:25):
Well, I know my daddy, he used to make jokes
when I was like ten, like, oh, you're not gonna
date until you twenty one, You're not gonna date till
you twenty five, you never gonna have a boyfriend, Like
it was always just such a taboo thing to talk about,
especially six two. Like, I feel like a lot of
our parents didn't prepare us for having sex and getting
out into the world and dealing with me. And so
do y'all feel like y'all parents prepare y'all for that?

(18:48):
Or was it even something that y'all talked about in
y'all households.

Speaker 2 (18:51):
Absolutely not. They did not prepare me for nothing. So
my mama got pregnant with me when she was in college.
So a lot of my conversations with her about dating, sex,
relationships and all that was just don't get pregnant, right.

Speaker 1 (19:04):
But she was always reading.

Speaker 2 (19:06):
Them freak nasty books in her book club, so I
would read some of them too, saying she even like
the historical romance Beverly Jenkins. Yes, so I was reading
all that I wanted, the slavery sex and the presentation
it was going down.

Speaker 1 (19:24):
I'm trying to see how they used to do, get creative,
you know. And then when I got okay, if your man.

Speaker 3 (19:33):
Said pale loon is what he's giving, it was funky
in there, that slavery.

Speaker 1 (19:45):
Dick watching science.

Speaker 2 (19:48):
I was watching Centers again last night because you can
rent it at home to watch, and that scene where
old girl had watched and she was about to get
her cootie cat. I said, I know it's funky, and
they're talking about you. He wanted to taste, He just
wanted to take. You're gonna get more than that, and
you gonna be tasting, an't he's gonna stain his nose,
He's uplip and everything else a cent to remember.

Speaker 1 (20:13):
But yeah, so anyway I'm getting away from things.

Speaker 2 (20:16):
It's a cent to remember. But I was reading this
stuff and I was learning about sex from there. My dad,
I think he still looks at me as a child,
my actual dad. I can't go to him for advice
about anything, and I wouldn't because I think that he
doesn't make good choices, is very much like the young guys,
and he's not young. And then my grandfather he would

(20:40):
try to instill in me to find a man of
God and all that, but I wasn't trying to hear
that back then when I was younger, and it just
sounded too grown, too mature, and nobody was really having
real conversations, just how to flirt or how to realize
somebody likes you like before it gets too serious. Even
the introductory things are there were certain expectations that I

(21:03):
had either been taught from movies or TV or just
social things, and I'm forming my expectations from all these
different things, but nobody is telling me how to really
interact it. Certain things like money conversations, the ability do
they have kids or not? You in high school, you
in college, you don't want somebody, you know, little things
like that, But nobody is talking about how to handle

(21:24):
things together.

Speaker 1 (21:25):
Yeah, and fast forward to now.

Speaker 2 (21:27):
My mom is divorced, but I think her and my
stepdaddy go together. So I don't know what's going on there.
And I'm like, yeah, I do be doing a lot
of things that I see you do, like just weird
stuff and I didn't learn.

Speaker 1 (21:41):
And you know what, also, I think is weird too
with our generator, like we always thought like this is
a scene on Bad Boys, if y'all remember, like when
the boy comes and picks up the girl for prom
and the dad is like at the door with a gun.
You know what I'm saying, Like, I just think that
that's corny and it is cause to me, it's like, yes,
you want to protect your daughter, but this is a
moment to say, you know what, let me pull them

(22:02):
to the side and have a real conversation. And you
know what I'm saying, like, let me can speak well,
you know, see see the things that are important rather
than be like, oh, I'm gonna scare you, and it
like but I know, we it's supposed to be a joke,
but people start taking that stuff literal because on social
media that was going viral a few years ago with
like men in the background would a gun and their
daughter in front of them with like their prom dress on,

(22:24):
Like that is wild. That's not the proper thing to
do to Like, we're not having conversations. We're just like, oh,
be afraid of my daughter. Then on the other end,
we're teaching the young boys like, oh, yeah, you pull
a woman, you're supposed to be fucking. You supposed to
be it's okay to be fucking. Like, no, it's not okay.
Like we never have healthy conversations about sex and.

Speaker 3 (22:45):
Things right, which is so crazy to be because you know,
you have that on one end, But then with the
little girls, if you wear short shorts or if you're
wearing like a two piece swimsuit, people are over sexualizing you.
If you're a little carbag, she's are your hervey year
than you should be for your age. And now you fast. Yeah,
we get the stigma of being fast. But then they're

(23:06):
out here telling the young boys to go fuck to go.
So it's like what it doesn't make sense at all or.

Speaker 2 (23:15):
That, Like, Okay, boys are supposed to get experienced and
you're supposed to do this. Why the girls are supposed
to maintain their virtue.

Speaker 4 (23:22):
So who y'all supposed to be?

Speaker 1 (23:26):
I would like to know. It's a complete unbalanced. But
I think that unbalanced shows in our generation with our
dating now, Like it's so apparent that we do not
know how to date anymore because our parents. I'm not
gonna lie, Like when it comes to my mom, like
my mom was married. My dad passed away when I
was very young, So growing up, my mom was just

(23:47):
always like, you don't need a man, be independent, do
this on your own. But if you do have a man,
make sure he sets you up, which nothing is wrong
with that, but basically our independence was so forefront. It
was just like my mom didn't have no tolerance for bullshit,
which is not a bad thing, but I do believe
I wish that my mom would have dated more and

(24:09):
been more out there and given herself and you know
what I'm saying, and had that experience of finding love again,
but she was so closed off to it because she's like, no, no,
this is this is it. You know. I had my
husband that was me, and I'm just like, so I
never really saw my mom really truly being in love,
you know what I mean. So I think with that,
I don't want to say, don't teach women how to

(24:31):
be independent, but I think as much as we need to, hey,
nobody's coming to save you, but also we need to
teach about partnership, be open to love. We don't teach
that in the black community at all.

Speaker 5 (24:43):
You know.

Speaker 2 (24:44):
I was talking to my mom about that because I
have a brother who's twenty three, and just looking at
how I'm the oldest, looking at how I was brought
up as a girl versus him, I would think it
would be flip flopped. All of the talk about being
in dependent, being on your stuff. It's like being the
oldest daughter. That's pressure because you have to do everything first.

(25:07):
Your parents are figuring it out first. And I'm not
mad at them. They're not gentle parents, but it's a
gentler form of parenting. They're giving him more room to
figure out what he wants to do. And he still
ain't got to figure it out, but we're just gonna
keep him on the prayer list.

Speaker 1 (25:21):
It's just so much software. But I was like when
I was twenty three.

Speaker 2 (25:24):
I was living here in Atlanta trying to figure it out.
I had already gone to college. I did everything the
right way and thinking that that was right. And I
guess they learned that you don't always need to do
it that way. It's just like it's very different.

Speaker 1 (25:34):
I also think that.

Speaker 2 (25:36):
Instead of teaching the women to be so independent, we
just need more balance, like you said, and something I
had asked a lot of the men on XO Man.
I asked them, the ones with children, and I asked
them about what they're teaching their sons about love and
relationships and dating and all.

Speaker 1 (25:53):
Of that, and what were you taught.

Speaker 2 (25:55):
A lot of them weren't taught at all, like what
we're saying. They're like our age and older. And then
some of them are teaching their kids certain things, and
then others don't have them yet, so they're trying.

Speaker 1 (26:05):
To figure it out.

Speaker 2 (26:05):
But yeah, it's like y'all got to talk to them
about that. Some of them are still avoidant and yeah.
I asked my brother, like, where are you getting your
advice from?

Speaker 1 (26:15):
Because you're making bad decisions and he was like, well,
I don't know.

Speaker 4 (26:18):
It's a bunch of I don't know why everybody don't know,
and yeah, please call me more.

Speaker 1 (26:23):
But that was such a good example that you said,
because they're teaching us to be independent and provide for
ourselves and do that, but they don't teach the little
boys that it's always all give him grace, girl trying
to He's gonna figure it out. You can figure it out.

Speaker 4 (26:35):
Make sure no girl is using you. But then you're
telling me y'all yet, ma'am, And I'm like you, ma'am.

Speaker 1 (26:43):
Or the problem.

Speaker 3 (26:44):
I think it's the internet too, though, because I think
even if you want to be somebody that wants to
really fall in love and you want to be a
liver boy or a liver girl, you have all of
these podcasts and all of this information on the Internet
that's making you be like, Okay, well, like I don't
know because I don't want to give played. Maybe y'all
need to protect myself. Maybe I do need to be
a player. Maybe I do need today multiple women instead

(27:06):
of just settling down with one person. Cause I am young,
so I feel like a lot of the time it's
all of these propaganda that's being put out as well
that's affecting the youth.

Speaker 1 (27:14):
And I feel like we didn't have this.

Speaker 3 (27:17):
I'm dull, I was dumb, dumb, But I also I
won't worry about out they playing me.

Speaker 1 (27:24):
Yeah, I don't. I was just saying we was all playing.
I do agree because I think that sometimes, like I'm
gonna just use y'all for example, like I'm a consumer
and I'm listening to a Dre or I'm listening to
a Kiki. I need to listen to what y'all are
saying from y'all's experience, but I also need to understand
that my life is my experience. Yeah, so I can't
say what Dre is saying. Hey, you know what I'm

(27:46):
gonna be outside he played me. But maybe I do
have a good man. I do have this situation that
it could work out for me, you know what I'm saying.
So I think a lot of times when we see
people on social media, take what I always say, lex
people went through that. You ain't got to go through that,
but also take my experiences lightly though you your situation
could be completely different. Because at the end of the day,

(28:09):
I always say I do want to be married, I
do want to have kids, Like that's what I want
for myself. So I think you do need to look
at your goals and what you want in life and
not only surround yourself with people with the same likeness,
but also do things that are conducive to getting there.
If you really want to be somebody's husband and you
really want to be somebody's wife, I don't think you

(28:31):
need to be watching red pill content or content of
people being like leave, don't do this. That's not conducive
to what you're trying to get at. You know what
I'm saying. But how do you escape it? Because you
open up a book, you get off. They all read
something else I've discovered, or do simple masks? Simple mask
you know what I'm saying, tune into It's okay, you

(28:55):
know what I'm saying. They don't know phonics, so they
can't sound it out if it wasn't on they site
word flash cars, y'all. We are doomed. We're gonna be
working forever, you know what I'm saying. Yeah, So I
think sometimes you do have to I enjoy a lot
of people's content, but I enjoy the content and I
log off.

Speaker 2 (29:11):
And I also think that people need to remember, no
matter how a show presents itself, everybody's here for entertainment.

Speaker 1 (29:17):
This is not PBS.

Speaker 2 (29:19):
Okay, this is not you can it's infotainment. So when
anybody speaks from their dating experience, nobody is giving you
a full documentary of their lives.

Speaker 1 (29:29):
You're only gonna get bits and pieces.

Speaker 2 (29:30):
So remember the things that we can laugh about now
we're talking about them, and we can make a joke
or whatever. But you you gotta stop taking everybody's things
that you see on the internet, especially when you don't
even watch the whole show as like fact or like
this is how it always is. Sometimes people are just playing.
If you read one books, you start catching on to jokes.

Speaker 3 (29:50):
Go ahead, No, I was just gonna say, And I
think it's just very interesting because when you look at
other cultures, they teach their daughters how today who today,
like where to find the men, and what you should
be looking for in a partner, what you should be
looking for in the man.

Speaker 1 (30:04):
We're just not taught those things.

Speaker 3 (30:06):
Yeah, we don't talk about it because and it's okay
for them to look to me in as a form
of financial security, right like, whereas with us we're looked
at as gold digger's because we want to be and
it's financially stable, and then they raise their their boys
to be providers, Like, this is what you're supposed to do.
You're supposed to be a leader, You're supposed to take
care of the household. And I'm not a person who
really believes in gender norms like that necessarily, but I

(30:30):
do believe in partnership. So whatever works for their culture,
they're teaching partnership, and that's something I do believe in, Like, cause.

Speaker 1 (30:38):
Honestly, I'm not gonna lie. As I've gotten older, I'm like, Okay,
I don't want to be a woman. I don't want
to be a stay at home mom. I want to
be a boss. I want to be a provider as
well for my household. Like there are certain goals I'm
reaching on my own. But imagine if I had somebody
who was equally yoked. Imagine the shit that we could
do together, you know what I'm saying. So I say

(30:58):
because I think so, Like this is an extreme example,
but like, look at jay Z and Beyonce. Do you
think they're talking about fifty fifty. No, they're not, because
it's beyond that. And I think a lot of times
we have to think beyond that, but we're sitting here
talking about it. If you're gonna send a man a
drink or not, or who paying a rent? What are
we talking about? Why do you think that we seem

(31:21):
to do that?

Speaker 2 (31:21):
Do you think it's like fear based and it's like
you teach your daughter to be independent and not to
look to anybody, but if you are gonna have somebody,
they need to come with this because you don't want
them to be taking care of somebody else, because maybe
you've seen.

Speaker 1 (31:34):
Your friends or your mother do that for somebody.

Speaker 2 (31:38):
Or do you feel like people get caught up and
looking at numbers and like, okay, there's so many women
and not enough men and having this fear that the
black men don't want us anymore, or that there's just
simply not enough, or you're gonna have to do something else.

Speaker 1 (31:52):
Why do y'all think that that continues to be how
it is? Ya? I know what it is.

Speaker 4 (31:57):
For me.

Speaker 3 (31:58):
It's just a sense of I'm not leaving here with nothing.
I might get played, but at least I'm leaving here
with something.

Speaker 2 (32:08):
I mean, with teaching your child something, What do you mean,
like like like how we were talking about parents teaching
their children. How today, Why don't you think that we
teach the women one way and the boys another and
give us different Yeah, giving people different expectations.

Speaker 3 (32:23):
But I do get leaving here with something. Yeah, I
want to leave here with something. But also I just
think America in general is rooted in misogyny. So that's
why I feel like for the generations and generations literally
since the beginning of time, women were taught that like, oh,
you have to present a certain way to get chosen.
But the problem is, back in the day, men used

(32:46):
to work hard for women. Men used to work.

Speaker 1 (32:49):
Hard for women. I've seen something the other day. I
think it was from Level. We had him on the
show recently.

Speaker 3 (32:53):
He was doing a stand up comedy tour or whatever,
and he was basically saying, like, back in the day
used to.

Speaker 1 (33:00):
Be very chivalries.

Speaker 3 (33:01):
They need to work hard for the women, Like Okay,
it's a puddle of water right here, let me throw
my coat down, let me throw my trench coat down,
so it's gonna walk over it. Men have lost that
these days. Like I feel like, back in the day,
women worthy prize. Now men feel like they're supposed to
be the prize too. But again, I think America is
just rooted in misogyny and it's just been passed on

(33:23):
from generation to generation.

Speaker 1 (33:25):
So I do agree with that because in the same breath,
because you know, like men used to do all that,
but now we're in a generation to where they have
taught us so much to be independent. If a man
do try to throw his trench go down, I got
my own trench coat hole ad because I'm a provider
and I can do it for myself. I'm saying, teachers,

(33:49):
don't let that man put his trench coat down, because
then he gonna feel like you owe him some pussy
and this and that, so do it yourself. They teach
us to do it ourselves and don't. But I'm saying
that's where society is now, So that's where the conflict
is from. You know what I'm saying, Men feel like, well,
I don't want to do that cause one a lot
of you niggas can't afford a trench coquess another topic.

(34:09):
But if he can, we want to throw the trash
at thrift store, you know what I'm saying. But thrifting
ain't mix me. But I'm just saying I want like
the women we were taught specifically, that's how my mom
taught me. Don't do it yourself. Yeah, you know what
I'm saying, like carry yourself and do it yourself.

Speaker 4 (34:29):
But that's important to say to do it myself except
for like work, and she was like, make sure you
have your own. She was always teaching me about an
exit plan.

Speaker 1 (34:36):
In her insight, I know why she did that, I
know what was going on in her life.

Speaker 2 (34:39):
But at the time she's like, you just never want
to be so dependent that you find yourself stuck.

Speaker 4 (34:44):
But she is very much she's she's like, that's man's work.
She don't want to take out no trash, she don't
want to fix something. She don't want to read instructions.

Speaker 2 (34:51):
When she orders some on Amazon to put it together,
she will literally wait for somebody to come do it.

Speaker 1 (34:56):
It's just different.

Speaker 2 (34:57):
One thing I think the men have done successfully and
I wish we as women could do it. They're able
to switch things, these things up, like how you were
talking about how they used to be so chivalous.

Speaker 4 (35:07):
They are able to come together and yes, and they
just they stick to it.

Speaker 1 (35:13):
And we are not women. We are not I'm cooking,
I'm cleaning, well.

Speaker 2 (35:17):
I'm not and I'm not, and then we want to
fight with each other. So be like, okay, girl, you
can be on the cooking squad and I'll be on
this squad, you know, cooking squad.

Speaker 3 (35:27):
But yeah, I mean, and I feel like a lot
of the time us as women, as a generation, as
a whole, we be feeling to realize, like we the
reason why the niggas is like that now the standards,
the standards are not the same as they used to
be because, like Keiki said, we can never stick on
to one side. So it's like some of us is
over here tired to tell and we like, fuck y'all

(35:48):
need because y'all ain't doing enough.

Speaker 1 (35:50):
I'm not fucking with you.

Speaker 3 (35:51):
I'm not giving you no pussy, I'm not going on
no dates with y'all. I'm not responding to no dms.
I'm not entertaining nothing, any of you. Got the women
over there that's still like, well shit, I need my
coochie squad.

Speaker 1 (36:00):
And then that's gonna be me.

Speaker 4 (36:01):
So they're gonna leave and come over here, and it's
just like, well, maybe somebody's gotta rupt this, you know, yea,
or we're not.

Speaker 1 (36:10):
It has to be that. But It's like if I
do that and you do that, we don't have to
talk about each other. Well, you just do it. I'm
gonna stay.

Speaker 4 (36:18):
If we're holding it down over here, hold it down
over there, what you're gonna do?

Speaker 2 (36:22):
Yeah, I don't know what that is, but yeah, I've noticed,
like even a couple of times, I've asked us, so,
what do you think about guys who do this?

Speaker 1 (36:29):
And David all of them.

Speaker 2 (36:30):
Well, I think that's a little sassy to be gossiping
about what another man is doing. I don't like to
speak on another man, but we those bitches be over there,
and I will say that.

Speaker 1 (36:39):
So, yeah, back to how we are raised, because you know,
you grew up in a two parent household. Parents were married,
like your dad, you know, showed you like what a
man is supposed to do. I yeah, like I said,
my dad passed away. My mom didn't bring men around.
I knew one man that my mom dated my entire life.
When my mom passed away and we was at her memorial,
man show up. He said, yeah, you s to date

(37:00):
your mom? Is yeah, come from It was shocking to me.
So growing up it was very much giving. Like I said,
your experience is your dad teaching you know, a man
is supposed to do that a man, but and it
was no, do it yourself, pick up yourself and get yourself,
you know what I'm saying. So that's where a lot
of the disagreement in our community comes from.

Speaker 3 (37:24):
And I hear that from a lot of women, you
know that I have conversations with that didn't grow up
with a male prison in a household. Sometimes I think
that that's the difference, because, for example, with me, I
don't never I have never really just felt pressured by
men to do anything. Yeah, because I'd be feeling like,
if you make me feel pressured, I'm gonna walk away.
The fuck You're weird because certain things to me are

(37:45):
just the bare minimum, like a man being nice to you,
a man taking you on a date, a man courting
you properly, a man treating you with respect.

Speaker 1 (37:54):
That's the bare minimum. That's what you're supposed to do.

Speaker 3 (37:56):
Like my dad raised me with the standard to like,
if a man can't do more for you than what
you're doing for yourself, why are you dealing with him?

Speaker 1 (38:05):
I did get that lesson. Yeah, my dad.

Speaker 2 (38:08):
Didn't really teach me anything, but my mom was married
to my stepdad forever and they got back.

Speaker 1 (38:12):
Well he didn't, that was just he gonna be mad.
He did because he don't look like professor we call him.

Speaker 2 (38:30):
But I didn't really learn anything from data ferent men.
But my stepdad did teach me, and my grandfather that's
who I started. That's who I always think of, like
my default dad, that as my grandfather, and he did
teach me a lot of things about how a man
is supposed to treat a woman just by being that example,
not a ton of conversation about it, but truly leading

(38:51):
by example and making sure that he was always thinking
about his family and that he was a man of
his word and things like that, and those are things
that I would look for and they don't be doing that.

Speaker 1 (39:03):
That's why I like being single. And I think that's
where that's been the hardest thing for me, Like I say,
just kind of letting my guard down and letting the
men be me, because I'd be like, you know, I'll
just do it myself, get out my way, get out
my way, and then I get the egg, I get
turned off, and then you're gone. So I like that.

Speaker 3 (39:19):
I feel like, just go out just yeah, But I
was just gonna say, like, based off of the three
of but it's being friends.

Speaker 1 (39:26):
I feel like you're the nicest one. No, I'm extreme.
You're so nice, and I feel like you're you're very.

Speaker 3 (39:32):
Soft and like womanly, Like I wouldn't look at you
and be like, oh, like she be stiff on niggas.

Speaker 1 (39:37):
No, it's not that I'm stiff on niggas, but I
will say that's something that I learned like this, Like
my last situation I've been in, if you told my
ex what I do for the man i'm with them,
He'll be like, you're lying. No, she doesn't. She's very
much like, Okay, forget it, I'm gonna handle it, and
I'm gonna do it. This is something that I've just

(39:59):
now learned, just learning how to step back and let
a man be a man. And my past situations it
was very much like, oh, I'm not asking him for nothing,
I'm not doing I'm a handle it because let me
show him that I that I that is true. I
was very Now I'm a lot softer now in this
situation because I'm just like, Okay, this is what I

(40:20):
want to do with my life, and this is more
conducive to what I want, you know what I'm saying.
But this is something that's still hard for me, very hard,
because I'm just like, let me put my truch code.
Can I ask y'all this though?

Speaker 3 (40:34):
Because I think that was a really good point that
you made, Because now that you said that, I do.

Speaker 1 (40:38):
When we were younger, you were that way.

Speaker 3 (40:41):
Why do you feel like women are like that, Like
they're so afraid to ask a man for certain things
or ask a man for what they want or what
they deem valuable in the relationship. But men are straight
up gonna ask us for what they want. They gonna
ask you for some place, They gonna ask you if
they want you to cook. They gonna ask you if
they want you to go pick something up for them,
whatever it is, you know what I mean.

Speaker 1 (41:02):
They're going to ask you for what they want. Why
us as women are we so.

Speaker 3 (41:07):
Afraid to let a man know what it is that
we want if we're not happy in a relationship. Is
it fear of being lonely or the man walking away.

Speaker 2 (41:15):
Or like, you know what, it's all for me, it's
a fear of disappointment, and like either not getting what
I want is one option, but the other, which is
worse to me because I'd rather you just tell me
know or whatever the response is gonna be if it's
not gonna happen, I don't want you to tell me
that you will and then you won't. Then it's gonna

(41:36):
send me down. Mariah Carey Walslawt in shower experience.

Speaker 1 (41:39):
Yes, where I'm just like, Okay, what are all the
signs that I miss?

Speaker 2 (41:43):
Now I gotta let him go. I'm sad I wi't
let him go, but I'm sad about this. I'm wondering,
like why did I waste my time all these things?
Questioning myself about what is it about me?

Speaker 1 (41:53):
And I didn't like it.

Speaker 2 (41:54):
I have become more comfortable in my older, wiser years
to share what it is that I want and if
it's not that like, okay, but you won't get what
you want right?

Speaker 1 (42:06):
Yeah? And I too think that it's from societal pressures.
We get online and a girl will be like, oh
if you can't get this out your nigga, you not
that girl. You're just not that girl. And sometimes when
you ask a man for something he doesn't give you
what you want. It's not that you're not that girl.
That's just not your person or he she no. But
let me say that it ain't even about in the person.

(42:28):
Some niggas just can't. But what I'm saying is if
a man doesn't want to do something for you, that
that too. But what I'm saying is that has no
testament to who you are as a woman. You know
what I'm saying. A lot of times a woman be like, Okay,
well I asked him this and he didn't do it.
Maybe I'm not good enough, maybe I'm not pretty enough,
and we blame it on ourselves. So a lot of
times women don't ask men for they want out of
that fear of rejection because I will say, well, you're

(42:50):
already giving him some plicy. I mean, that's what I'm saying.
But that's why I say it's the fear of rejection
because we don't because we all when you get on line,
what they say, oh no, it's not in my love language.
If a man tells me no, if a nigga tell
you know, he don't like you, and I am.

Speaker 2 (43:07):
So tired about love languages. Yeah, some of that stuff
y'all be saying. It's not there are fine a book
with y'all need to read the book, y'all talk about
all these random.

Speaker 1 (43:19):
Things my love.

Speaker 4 (43:23):
Yeah, and it's not just about what you get, it
is how you show up.

Speaker 3 (43:27):
But anyway, and people bring out different versions of their
selves depending on who they're dating, Like one person could
get a whole completely different version of you than another
person depending on how y'all Bobby being as your person orn.
I just think it's childish though, when women try to
put their selves against other women based off of like things.
I think that's where they made up love language has

(43:50):
come because I feel like it makes some girls feel
like superior, Yeah, because.

Speaker 1 (43:55):
They be thinking, Oh, this man paid my rent. Your
man don't pay your rent. Oh my gosh, I could never.
But maybe her man loves her, and that man paying
your rent is like opinion a bucket to him. I
look at it like maybe he can't pay. Like everybody is, everybody's.

Speaker 3 (44:13):
Situation is not the same, right right, So sometimes like, yeah,
one girl, her man might be paying her rent because
he can afford to. This girl's man may not be
able to afford to do that. That doesn't mean that
he doesn't love her, it's just that he can't afford
to do it.

Speaker 2 (44:26):
And if it's your ren why you can't pay it?
That's what I would like to know since what's going on?
Because we need to talk.

Speaker 1 (44:31):
About that at some point? Who got nobody? We gotta
have some accountability. What's going on? What's talking about on?

Speaker 2 (44:38):
Because it's like we can demand things from everybody else, right,
and a tough lesson that I had to learn from myself. Right,
It's like, Okay, you want somebody to treat you a
certain way, but do you even treat yourself that way?

Speaker 1 (44:52):
And if you things that you do, how do you
do that?

Speaker 2 (44:54):
You say that you care about yourself with the way
you eat, the way that you act your habits, you're
not taking care of yourself, not doing a lot of
the things that.

Speaker 1 (45:01):
You want to do.

Speaker 4 (45:02):
You don't have to spell that out for somebody. They
can see it, they can smell it.

Speaker 1 (45:06):
They know what it is.

Speaker 2 (45:08):
So it's like when you not really tuned in and
doing what's best for you, other people notice that. Why
would you ever expect anybody to treat you treat you
better than you treat you. That's crazy, And so to
your rent every now and again, you know things happen,
totally understand So if you fall on hard times, But
like the expectation is somebody that's a.

Speaker 1 (45:29):
Bit entire, that a lot. It is expecting that, like
expecting that.

Speaker 3 (45:33):
We've had conversations when we were younger, and it was
people that I used to like work in the clubs
with girls I used to be cool with when I
was younger. They used to have the expectation up on
meeting someone on the first day, Oh, you need to
pay my rent. Like, I think it's different if you
get in a relationship and that's what your man wants
to do for you, if he wants to help alleviate

(45:55):
some of your stress. Sometimes when y'all have a real
connection and y'all have a real, real or that's completely different.
But meeting somebody on the first date and having that
be an expectation, it is just like where are many you.

Speaker 1 (46:08):
Didn't meet him? Was he gonna get paid? I don't know.
That's a mess. However, I work love her rent getting
paid regardless because she's she's a hustler. She got that bag,
she got that check on it. I mean, and me
and my men are in love.

Speaker 3 (46:29):
That's another thing too, Like I mean, it's you know
what I mean, I think that that stuff matters, like
if you're in a relationship.

Speaker 2 (46:38):
And you see a future with this person or already
just trying to get and if you're just gonna be
trying to get things, stop doing it to men who
are working. Y'all need to go find those scammers. A
lot of them have already been deported.

Speaker 1 (46:51):
Now.

Speaker 2 (46:51):
Back in my day, when I was fresh and hot
in these Atlanta streets, a lot of girls had those
expectations because they was running them tax scams. The Africans
was running the tax skians. I had me one and
a few other people had some too, okay, you know,
and so they are no longer in the country.

Speaker 1 (47:08):
Obvious seeing them posting the uh in Kenya with.

Speaker 2 (47:13):
Texting no, I said, they're posting the Zebras and giraffes
because they done got sent back to Kenya's.

Speaker 1 (47:22):
Well made. Maybe said people are I.

Speaker 2 (47:25):
Think also, like dealing with somebody who is scamming for money,
they are stealing, dealing with them, it's a lot different
from dealing with somebody who is earning their money. No
matter how they go about well, it does matter if
they are truly earning their money and not stealing it
in some shape form or fashion that's different, like they
work for that, they earn that. You just want to
blow through it. I think they had a really cleared

(47:48):
house on all of them. A few times I was.

Speaker 4 (47:49):
Hoping they was gonna be able to get back get
hitting them.

Speaker 1 (47:53):
Ain't nothing. They don't want to accept cars.

Speaker 2 (47:55):
Nowhere in America do I go, except for Atlanta, where
you walk into somewhere and they got signs up about
no cash, app cards, no gift cards.

Speaker 1 (48:02):
Know this, no that. I'm like, y'all have dry some
places because you know, the clubs don't want to take
X I learned that one time back. What was that club?
A love Aroma? Our? I p yes, our pizza Wings
had a time up in there.

Speaker 2 (48:20):
Okay, but anyway, yeah, the club's don't take it because
it's very easy to dispute.

Speaker 1 (48:25):
Y'all gotta stop scamming. The scamming all right. Top was
drinking to day, Okay that Top.

Speaker 3 (48:33):
Girls, and even the cocktail is a little bit tropical too.
So this one we're gonna call the XO man.

Speaker 1 (48:42):
All right.

Speaker 3 (48:42):
We have some repicidal tequila, we have some caparis, some
lemon juice, and then we have some moan and stone
fruit syrup. And then we garnished it with a beautiful orchid,
so everyone has like a different flower. I think I
tried to match the outfits a little bit better. And
so this is the XO Man in tribute to Kiki's
new show that is dropping. And I want to just
take the time to personally thank you Key, because with

(49:03):
our key, I wouldn't even be here.

Speaker 1 (49:05):
I was just gonna say it. Shout out to you.
H you she had I mean she.

Speaker 3 (49:14):
I actually just learned it a month or so ago
when we did the Travel Queen's premiere.

Speaker 2 (49:18):
So I can't remember if it was you, Lex or Andrea,
but we me and Ty have a friend Domino.

Speaker 1 (49:27):
Yeah, shout out to Domino. He's a chef.

Speaker 4 (49:28):
He has some sauce sauce spas.

Speaker 2 (49:30):
Anyway, we were talking one day and we ran into
each other at homecoming talking, talking, talking, and at the time,
we had a girl who was making drinks on our show,
and he was like, if you ever need somebody else,
I know a girl.

Speaker 4 (49:43):
This is my homegirl Tie. She's really really good.

Speaker 2 (49:46):
So I was like, okay, Well, we were still using
that other girl and we didn't know she was gonna quit,
but we were still using that other girl, and then
one we were talking it was it was you and
I was like, oh, I know somebody, my friend dom
No had actually told me I'll connect y'all, and so yeah,
it was from that and I was like I was
telling her. I was like, you know, it's better that

(50:08):
it worked out that way, because I love this setup
for you.

Speaker 4 (50:11):
It's it's it's been great watch.

Speaker 3 (50:13):
I love hot Down. Yes, the part of the Poor
Minds crew. I mean they were like, she right down
the tie life story.

Speaker 1 (50:29):
She's like, I'm just knocking over and a half years. Yeah.
I think it was a December twenty Yes.

Speaker 3 (50:36):
That is.

Speaker 1 (50:37):
It was like because it was when we first moved
to this studio. Yeah, and it wasn't like, oh we
tried you out. Then the three months when I was like, okay,
let's try somebody was like yeah.

Speaker 3 (50:45):
And then crazy too because full circle moment, Keikey and
Medina were the first guests that we had when we
moved to this study. It was it was yeah, but
you know what, It's come a long way, still looks
very cute, and I love recommending other people. I don't

(51:06):
like trying to keep everybody for me in my back
pocket if I see an opportunity or even a better opportunity. Sometimes,
you know, when people recommend you for stuff, you just
never know what could happen.

Speaker 2 (51:16):
So anytime somebody's like, oh I know somebody can do this,
I try my best to put them in the best place,
even if I would rather use them and say I
know something is better, it's going to be better for you.

Speaker 1 (51:25):
I like to do that. I think it's important.

Speaker 3 (51:27):
Okay, let you right, you would not be a toie
on four Minds if it was not for Kiki.

Speaker 1 (51:36):
Only forgot about that, Okay, I got you right here.

Speaker 2 (51:39):
It does, and it also pays to speak up about
different things that you want to do because you never
know who's listening, who's watching, and it's like, oh, I
didn't know you wanted to do that.

Speaker 1 (51:50):
I got you. Did you ever think that you would
kind of be in this kind of situation though, like
doing bartending on TV or not TV?

Speaker 3 (51:57):
You know, I wanted my own show, Okay, literally on
my past vision boards like the podcast set up and
all of this stuff. I had a title on everything,
but I just it takes so much commitment to have
different topics all of that.

Speaker 1 (52:10):
So that is where I just it didn't click for me.

Speaker 3 (52:13):
So that's why I say everything aligns perfectly because for
that opportunity to even come up a year after I
did that vision board, it just shows that you just
walking your purpose and everything's gonna.

Speaker 1 (52:23):
Come to you as necessary.

Speaker 3 (52:24):
So the.

Speaker 1 (52:28):
Club house, all right, you are second topic. We want
to talk about content creator experiences. Okay, because a lot
of time, you know, before content creators were you know,
well known or some content creators now are considered celebrities.
You know, we were regular people online. We used to

(52:50):
say crazy things, have crazy moments, have a breakdown, calling
people names.

Speaker 4 (52:55):
I used to love to get drunking it on the internet,
used to love to talk about people on Twitter a
popular moment.

Speaker 1 (53:01):
And I don't mean to bring it up because I
love you, girl, but I gotta use you for an example.
When Sizza had her big, big break was when she
came out on Rihanna's album Anti. She got a home
on there. People started digging up her old tweets and
she was like dis and Rihanna and Sissa replied in
response to that, was like, hey, do y'all realize During

(53:22):
that time, I was jealous of her because I wanted
to be her. I felt like she had all the
things that I wanted, and instead of just giving her
her flowers, it came out and hate and she was like,
so I'll take that. But you know, I was just
talking shit. Who knew that I was gonna end up
in a studio with Rihanna? So I do y'all think
that we should be held at like a higher standard

(53:44):
for our old tweets or should people just be understanding like, hey,
they used to be human, no, or it's not used
to be We're still humans. I think it depends on
what the tweet is.

Speaker 2 (53:53):
Okay, talking shit about Rihanna is one thing, but other
things that can be like deeply and real hate, like
racist things and stuff, some stuff, uh uh, you're not
coming back, or at least from me. Yeah, there are
certain things I think that we can grow. We can
be immature, We can do all kinds of things. Sometimes
you just talking shit because you feel like it. Sometimes
it's fun to get those words off your chest. Yeah,

(54:15):
you know, And I don't think that we should be
held to a higher standard. But I also don't think
we really get to choose really up to everyone else.

Speaker 1 (54:25):
People do.

Speaker 2 (54:26):
But I think that it's not very productive, and what's
the point what you mean? And why are y'all digging.

Speaker 1 (54:32):
Up old tweets? That's what I feel. I wouldn't know
who was on the digging committment.

Speaker 3 (54:36):
People we havn't too much time on their hands. Times
where like I've had tweets that have went viral. I remember, Okay,
one time I had tweeted something about loving black men
and like allly wanting to be with a black man.

Speaker 1 (54:51):
And this is what's wrong with that?

Speaker 3 (54:52):
But this was like maybe like a year ago, I
guess when I was like younger, maybe like six years ago,
I had tweeted, this is my last Negro relationship. We
look at but it's so funny because mind you, I'm
tweeting about like black love and like loving black men,

(55:12):
and then somebody goes and they finds this tweet and
they like this you and I'm like, yeah, I mean cause,
to be honest, this is my last Negro relationship. I
still feel that way. However, black love is beautiful, but
but for me, this is my last Negro relationship.

Speaker 1 (55:32):
So I just feel like sometimes people have to look
at other people as humans.

Speaker 3 (55:38):
Like you used to tweet a lot of crazy shit
too when you were probably twenty three and twenty four.

Speaker 1 (55:43):
But the spotlight is not on you. Nobody is digging
up your old tweets.

Speaker 3 (55:46):
I agree with you when you said, if it's something racist,
or if it's certain things political views, all of that,
nine times out of ten, Yeah, I probably can't turn
a blind eye to that, because you probably still feel
that way.

Speaker 1 (56:00):
You're just more quiet about it now.

Speaker 3 (56:02):
But when it comes to like talking shit about celebrities
or saying shit about how people dress, or I don't know,
just young.

Speaker 1 (56:10):
Dumb shit, we were all it's trivial. We were all
doing it. I used to be tweeting about how Drake
couldn't dress back in the day. I need now now
why am I in? I need? I used to be
like Drake so fine, but like why he be wearing
big T shirts all the time?

Speaker 3 (56:26):
Like story he was.

Speaker 4 (56:27):
Wearing in big T shirts like nightgown he was? He was,
And I've seen deleted all the sweets, but.

Speaker 3 (56:35):
To do that, but I feel like we're in a
position now you have to, and I feel like you're
being oblivious if you don't go back and delete a
lot of y'all old stuff. If you have a Twitter
that's more than like five, six, ten years old, you
need to I did a whole sweep, girl. I searched
every celebrity name I could think of and deleted everything
because I just don't have time for We've seen it

(56:57):
happen too many times.

Speaker 1 (56:58):
Well, there was it, uh recently where a man he
was murdered by his girlfriend and everybody was like, oh
my gosh, because he was black and she was white.
This happened in Georgia, and everybody was like, oh my gosh,
she needs to be arrested. Jailer rop until they started
digging up his old tweets, right, And this is what

(57:19):
I have to ask y'all. This is like that one
in Miami. It's the same one with the only thing.
So they digging up old tweets to this man, He's like, oh,
I wouldn't piss on a black woman. I wouldn't. I
would rather burn in hell than hold a black woman's hand.
Calling us monkeys and everything under the sun. Everybody's like, oh,
you on your own rested. They said literally pressed in preference.

(57:41):
You know that was clever. I like, now, I didn't
say it, and i'dn't stand on it. Because that was.
But I will say so, so in the same breath,
we're saying, don't judge us by our old tweet.

Speaker 4 (57:52):
Well, I already said racism the door, you know, but
we feel strong about that.

Speaker 1 (57:57):
Now wait a minute, so I do I do think
that it's a line like you said, I agree with
you if it's something about like you talking about Drake
shoes or you know, like if somebody tweeted something old
about me, like oh, Lex wigs was crunchy, they was,
you didn't tell a lie? What about if somebody had
like but but if you're talking about, oh my gosh,
Lex looks like a monkey with big lips. Hold on,

(58:20):
now that's a different area. That is. Yeah, you know
what I'm saying.

Speaker 2 (58:24):
I would just be very afraid if the dms were unleashed,
all the group chats, all of the things that I
send in private, the.

Speaker 1 (58:33):
Other I don't know what I do now right, This
is what y'all need to do. Every month, I delete
my DMS with my friends just in case I get hacked.
But I like, yeah, whatever we get hacked, we're fucking
cooked me too, bit Barbara, real bitch, we out of there, well,

(58:55):
because me and you I feel like all of us though,
to be honest, the three of us me.

Speaker 2 (59:03):
Wait a minute, people ever, me and my mama's group
chat because she gets unleashed in public.

Speaker 1 (59:08):
Our U grew chat that I'm in with y'all. Well,
you know she goes in, she does, she goes in,
So yes, I well maybe not. I'm not gonna lie.
I don't do it every month, but like every like
I probably do it. Like you're me, and how you
exaggerate that I.

Speaker 3 (59:26):
Lie?

Speaker 1 (59:26):
Can you add like every six months? Probably twice a year.
I do every now and again and again because I
had a while where I kept getting locked out of
my accounts. Oh and I was like, somebody is trying
to hack my ship. Me and Dred we already get
canceled every other day as it is, I be.

Speaker 4 (59:46):
Seeing something like, dang, what they do now, ain't taking Joe.

Speaker 1 (59:50):
That's just me existing. No, But I feel like, maybe
because you know us, you be knowing this to Joe.

Speaker 3 (01:00:00):
Other people be taking the things we say at face
value and they be so offended.

Speaker 1 (01:00:04):
That's what they got. What I said the other day,
I literally tweeted, oh, CARDI did your big one always
let him post you before you post him over there.
You're forty. Chimp chatter you They said, chimp chatter, What
the hell that's racy? Yeah, chi chatter. It's crazy. They said,

(01:00:29):
you are a dirty slut, just like Cardi. I said, well,
I'm in good company because he was having a ball
on that boat. I mean, and am I almost forty?
Yes I am, But I was just We're just having
a conversation. I'm commenting on something because at the end
of the day, I'm a woman first, and we have
all witnessed what this woman has been going through four years.

(01:00:51):
So yes, do I know anything about her man that
she's with now? No, they'd be like, oh, but he Oh,
he got kids, he got newborns. All I want is
women to have a good time and get out of
a rut that they in. That's clapping for she's having
a good time. It's hard and he's looking good. Now
he fun as well. Let the girl have fun. Who
cares she's gonna go off and get married tomorrow. That's

(01:01:14):
not what we're saying. Nobody said that rooting for that either,
you know. But it's like when we try to show
girl power. I got caught said that was so nasty.
And so very mean shill. But that's why we were
talking about earlier.

Speaker 3 (01:01:32):
I had to take like, I deactivated my Twitter because
I just feel like I did.

Speaker 1 (01:01:37):
Too after you told me that, and I caught literally
you told me, and you went on your ass because
is usually the villain. So I was like, well, I'm good.
Funny thing is I don't even be being a villain.
I just be eating like thoughts, and people get offended,
and a lot of the time it's.

Speaker 3 (01:01:56):
Not even directed personally towards other people. It's just my opinion.
But I feel like, because I'm the messenger, people just
be like, Oh, this stupid ass beach.

Speaker 1 (01:02:06):
She thinks she's a bull of us.

Speaker 2 (01:02:07):
All I saw with you where they was done with
your ass was the watch thing. Sure, I took my
Apple watch off and put it into my bag and
put my put.

Speaker 1 (01:02:17):
My my mother, but it was on with that dreas
what I'm saying, yeah, y'all, y'all for jewelry.

Speaker 2 (01:02:32):
I just did it because I saw a wedding photo
a bridesmaid, a bridemaid as Nannie would say, and she
had she didn't even put the decorative band on. She
just had that black band on and I said, well,
this looks very thick and jim asque at a wedding
and you have on a gown with this rubber band
on your wrist, like I don't know what.

Speaker 1 (01:02:54):
Yeah, you weren't wrong the girls and they.

Speaker 3 (01:02:56):
Don't even know they need saving and they be getting
mad at me, and it's like, fine, don't.

Speaker 1 (01:03:01):
Take my advice and keep playing it white, I mean,
with your ball down. I started Poor Minds the other
day too, and I always retweet the positive comments, but
it was some girl who was like, I can't believe
poor Minds has gotten so popular. Y'all love listening to
dumb bitches, And.

Speaker 4 (01:03:18):
I was like, damn.

Speaker 1 (01:03:19):
But then it also be like, well who else should
have got popular?

Speaker 4 (01:03:22):
You?

Speaker 1 (01:03:24):
Probably not? But again, poor Minds, we have fun. What's
wrong with black women having fun? And this is not
meant to be like anything deep intellectual. Can we have
a good time? It's in the comedy category. God damn it, loud, right,
that's Adam Sam. We really are though no, I wasn't
being I noticed.

Speaker 3 (01:03:42):
I know. I mean, right, we are the theos we
are and that's what I'm saying, and that's why we
was top sixty. Oh every week exactly Top sixty comedy podcasts,
Apple Podcasts.

Speaker 1 (01:03:55):
But I'm just saying, like I think, if anything, that's
why people.

Speaker 3 (01:03:58):
Get so upset, because you've had such a good time
and we've been ourselves the whole time, and they're like,
I can't believe these bitches made it this far.

Speaker 1 (01:04:07):
And I laughed, how dare you laugh? What Nigga said? Broke?
People should never laugh?

Speaker 4 (01:04:13):
Damn, black women should never laughing.

Speaker 1 (01:04:17):
Broke no more, and we still laughing. I thought y'all
was with me when I got rid of my three
dollars became visible this year. Wait a minute, ain't I said? God?

Speaker 3 (01:04:32):
Damn, I thought we was upgrading to gether. But why
y'all think that black people? I'm not even gonna say
black people. Let's just say minorities because I don't want
to pinpoint black people. No, it's definitely not like, but like,
why do y'all think minorities are like that as a whole?
Like we're rooting for people until they make it or
until they start doing something significant. It's like, yeah, they're

(01:04:53):
my girls, I'm fucking they so fucking funny, and then
as soon as you make it to that point, they're.

Speaker 1 (01:04:58):
Like you because you said it earlier, because a lot
of times people feel like it should have been.

Speaker 2 (01:05:02):
Them's almost like they tricked themselves into thinking that they're
good people because oh, well, i'll let you do this,
I'll bring you along for this because I'm in a
better position.

Speaker 1 (01:05:11):
But when those tables turn, which they usually do, they
don't like it.

Speaker 2 (01:05:15):
Energy shifts down, They're jealous and now they're questioning, why
are you and not them nitpicking every little thing you do.
I think it's something that is really and truly internalized
and it has nothing to do with whoever they're talking about.

Speaker 1 (01:05:28):
It's really them. They ain't even that funny, and I
don't my personal experience. I don't think it's like a
minority thing. I think that's more of like a character
flaw because I agree ninety percent of our audience is black, right,
so of course my critique ninety percent of the time
is going to come from black people, yeah, and black women,

(01:05:49):
So it's not fam Because I realized that when we
did the Australian thing with them, that it was some
people in the comments like why she's so loud, because
bench I'm loud, that's just who I am. I can't help,
but that's who I am, So I think it's more
of a character thing, like if you don't like somebody,
don't tune in, don't comment because I will say, I
don't like when people try to pinpoint, oh, black people,

(01:06:11):
we only do this to each other. It's really not
that because if your audience is ninety ninety five percent black,
that's where your critique is gonna come from.

Speaker 2 (01:06:19):
Now, I don't really interact with a whole lot of
others across the board, like in any aspect of my life.

Speaker 1 (01:06:25):
I'll just be honest.

Speaker 2 (01:06:26):
I do like a lot of British comedies, yeah, things
like that when I'm watching it on the Telly, But
outside of that, I don't know. So I only see
stuff really online and they be doing it a lot.
I don't know if I could say one is more
than the other. I don't know why we are so
hard on each other, though, I do think is basically

(01:06:48):
rooted and jealousy though, even if they don't really feel
like it, or just trying to like validate themselves by
putting somebody else down. I hate when people feel like
they have to do that or even once is like
paying you a compliment but instead of just paying you
the compliment, they give someone else a dig yeah, or
they make a dig it's something you had done before.

Speaker 4 (01:07:08):
Oh, this is so much better than that, instead of
just saying you look nice today.

Speaker 1 (01:07:12):
I don't know what that's about.

Speaker 4 (01:07:13):
It's just like it's a weird, mean, girlish kind of thing.
But the boys do it too, Drev.

Speaker 1 (01:07:18):
Let me ask you this. So, when you hit your
global status with your US and everything you want to do,
who do you think is gonna hate on you more
black people are white people? To be honest black people,
I disagree wholeheartedly. I think so I know, So what

(01:07:40):
do you think I was gonna say black people too?
I say no, because I think a lot of like
white women, they cannot stand to see something, especially a
black woman, be ahead of them. I think when all
the think pieces start and this and that around things
that you do, it's gonna come from white women.

Speaker 3 (01:07:58):
That that happens a lot in the United States. So
I think when you travel more and you go places
outside of here, it's not really like that.

Speaker 1 (01:08:07):
I think that black women we be our own biggest enemies.
A lot of the time.

Speaker 3 (01:08:13):
We always against each other instead of trying to come
together because I think we look at a lot of
things like it's a competition, which, if we really gonna
get deep about it, I think it steems way back
from slavery to gym crow laws. All of these things
are reasons why as black women, we look at each
other as competition and we just can't be happy for
one another because it's like your success means my downfall,

(01:08:34):
when in reality that's not what it means. We can
all come together and do things collectively. But it's like
even with us, like and I'm sure Kekey, because I
was gonna ask Kekey too, I'm sure she deals with
the well, I know you deal with the same things.
I've seen all comments too. People are always putting us
against each other as black women. Me and you are
doing something together, Keiki and Adina are doing something together,

(01:08:55):
but people can't help but try to put us against
each other. And it's like you said, fire for cent
of our audience are black women. So guess who it
is in the comments that's doing it? Black women. I
can't speak to what white women are gonna do when
that's not our audience. Yet I get there, but I
guess because I'll chat with y'all when I get right,
I guess because I see it.

Speaker 1 (01:09:16):
Like just like for an example, like we can talk
about like the things that are going on with like big,
big celebrities. But like I said, a lot of times
when I'm scrolling, I be ending up on the side
of TikTok. I'm know I'm not supposed to be on,
but it be a lot of times I'll be seeing
white white people be so bold on there. Yeah, so
bold on there. And like I said, I feel like

(01:09:38):
when it comes to Beyonce showed it with Cowboy Carter,
the white women showed they ass Beyonce's biggest hater is
white women period.

Speaker 3 (01:09:47):
Like it's I mean, I don't know that's why, because
I know a lot of black people personally that have
no reason to think that Beyonce doesn't deserve all of
the like praise that she is with They're still like,
I think she overrated.

Speaker 1 (01:10:02):
And that's somebody you cannot trust, and that's.

Speaker 3 (01:10:04):
Somebody you can't trust other than the fact that everybody
else loves her. So it's like, well, let me just
say I feel like she overrated. I don't really feel
like she did great. I was having a conversation with
one of my elders. I won't say who, somebody in
my family, and they were just like, you know, Beyonce
is cool, but I just she don't give me that

(01:10:26):
feeling that Aretha Franklin and Patty LaBelle and Anita Baker,
those were singers, Like I'm not saying that she can't sing,
but I'm just saying like she she's not on their level,
and she don't make me feel like that deep down
in my soul, the way that they used to make
me feel when they came out with albums What Sorrow.

Speaker 1 (01:10:47):
Well, I don't think that's hey. I think that's just
versus somebody saying this is not country. She does not
deserve this, she sucks. They didn't say she sucks. They
just said I don't get that same feeling. So it's
a difference between critiquing somebody and have an opinion and
just flat out being a hater and being mean.

Speaker 3 (01:11:05):
Just because I would like or black women to be
our allies because we all black, I would love that, however,
not the allies. I would love for us to be
allies because we're all black. But at the end of
the day, like I just feel like hate be coming
from everybody. It goes back to what y'all were saying earlier,
which I think y'all both made a really good point.

(01:11:25):
It's more of a character flaw, yeah, than a race thing.

Speaker 1 (01:11:28):
It's definitely something internal.

Speaker 2 (01:11:30):
I hate that we feel like there can only be one,
even like whether people are pitting y'all against each other
or like it's like, oh, well, Kik, how do you
feel about poor mind's doing this?

Speaker 1 (01:11:44):
I feel great. Those are my friends. I am so
proud of them. What else would I feel? Do you
think I'm supposed to feel like I should be doing
what they do? We're different people.

Speaker 2 (01:11:54):
It is in people, and whether they think it or
they want you to think it, I don't know what
it is. But we've got to collectively get out of
this mindset that there can only be one or two
or three. There's not room for more people. The Internet
is big, it's not going anywhere, I hope, and there's
room for everybody to do so many things. Do you
only buy one lip gloss? Do you only watch one show?

(01:12:18):
Do you only wear one ounce?

Speaker 1 (01:12:20):
Because I don't only buy one? I like a variety.
What you like? You know?

Speaker 3 (01:12:27):
Sometimes you buying cans already. Let me know you ain't
real bean connoisseur. That's that's all for the baked beans
that take all day finish.

Speaker 1 (01:12:41):
I said, it depends on if I'm doing like a
red beans and rice bag beans. If I'm doing a
baked beans can of beans, you need a variety.

Speaker 3 (01:12:51):
Baked beans with bag beans, you're nuts.

Speaker 1 (01:12:56):
You gotta be eighty seven a variety of things, you
know what I'm saying. Certain though, for certain situations. Well,
I do have a question, though, how.

Speaker 3 (01:13:07):
Do y'all feel about being in this space that we're
in and everybody with the cancel culture? Do you ever
feel pressure to make sure like versus back in the
day when you first started doing cocktails, you could speak
more freely. Now, do you ever feel the pressure to
where you feel like you can't be yourself because you
can't really say what's on your mind all the time

(01:13:28):
out of fear of being.

Speaker 2 (01:13:29):
Canceled sometimes or having like some sort of backlash for
sharing my opinion. Because when I shared on something that
I consider light, people be real mass.

Speaker 1 (01:13:43):
So it's like if I.

Speaker 2 (01:13:45):
Really let something out or like you know, you might
have a slip of the tongue and say something not
exactly how you mean it, and it get misconstrued. I've
been working at communicating better, but you know, one day
at a time, y'all still don't know.

Speaker 1 (01:13:59):
What words mean, so that can be difficult.

Speaker 2 (01:14:01):
But it's hard, and it's like, Okay, you want to
make sure that you get your point across, make sure
that you deliver in your talking. But then it's like, eh,
I probably shouldn't say that because they're gonna be too mad.

Speaker 1 (01:14:12):
But I think people also don't consider people's experiences, like
I feel this way because I've been through something, So
how can you cancel me or take that away from me?
This is what my experience is. Forget even always one
that exists on a platform and says I hate men.
All men are bad and they're like, oh my gosh,
this stupid girls gonna leave. Y'all don't know what she's
been through in her experience with me, and y'all don't

(01:14:32):
know what her dad, her uncle, her brothers are, any
experience with men that she's had. So you have to
understand where people are coming from. So I think we're
coming from in the society now a closed minded point
of view. I don't agree with her cancel it.

Speaker 3 (01:14:46):
I think people want you to lie though, because I
think I've said this before on the show, Like people
have said like they'll be like, oh, I feel like
Drea acts like she's perfect and she hasn't been through
anything versus Les. I feel feel like, you know, she
tries to understand different people's perspective, which is fair. I
do feel like you try to understand different people's perspective

(01:15:06):
with me. It's not that I haven't tried to understand
the perspective. I just ain't been through that. So what
do you want me to speak to Do you want
me to lie and be like, oh, yeah, I've been
through that to make you feel better when I haven't.

Speaker 1 (01:15:19):
So I don't think they expect you a lot. I
guess what they mean so more is like hypothetically, I
guess what I try to do is like, let me
try to put myself in their shoes and see why
and understand why they did that.

Speaker 3 (01:15:31):
Sometimes I feel like you don't have their shoes though, huh,
I said sometimes.

Speaker 1 (01:15:36):
Sometimes I haven't. So and this might be a little
bit extreme, but like if like somebody says, oh, I
lived under a bridge, Have I lived under a bridge? Absolutely? Not,
but maybe I can understand their circumstances that got them
there because I try to take myself out of lexp
shoes and look, Okay, what went on? What is there?

(01:15:56):
So I don't think necessarily is oh I've been through that,
because I haven't been through a lot of shit. But
I guess I just try to be understanding just because
I have been through some things that people are like,
how the fuck did you get there? You know? So
I don't think it's necessarily, but some that's the beauty
of life. Everybody's brain works different. I don't want people
to think like me. I don't want I think that's

(01:16:16):
what brings interest to the show too. Why would y'all
want two people who sit here talking about exactly the
whole time. That's boring. I agree.

Speaker 2 (01:16:25):
I try to look in all aspects of my life,
put myself in somebody else's shoes, try to understand how
they get there. Sometimes I really just be confused, because, bitch,
how did you get here?

Speaker 1 (01:16:35):
Kyl?

Speaker 2 (01:16:36):
There are so many things you could have done. Like
if you said, have I slept under a bridge? Yes,
I would be like, now, lex you know, it's a
few things you could have did before we got to this.

Speaker 4 (01:16:44):
Point, but I do try to understand that's where I be.

Speaker 1 (01:16:48):
Mill Bridge. I would have because sometimes that's how I'd be, like, well,
playing devils.

Speaker 2 (01:16:57):
Yeah, it's difficult, but it's also like I think we
all across the board, the listeners and the host, we
gotta be okay with people just not liking it.

Speaker 1 (01:17:05):
I wish that some people who don't like it would
just go away, you know, and shut up. But it's like, hey,
this is.

Speaker 2 (01:17:11):
My opinion, this is my take, and if you don't
like it, if you feel a way about it, that's okay.

Speaker 1 (01:17:16):
This isn't for you.

Speaker 4 (01:17:17):
The sooner we all realize that everything ain't for everybody,
the better, but it is.

Speaker 1 (01:17:21):
It is hard.

Speaker 2 (01:17:22):
And then like even when it comes to thinking about
people wanting to cancel you based on your opinion or
how you treat stuff, I just really feel like people
be slow because sometimes I think that they read too
deep into things.

Speaker 1 (01:17:34):
I think that they don't understand.

Speaker 2 (01:17:36):
They're not paying I don't know what's happening, but something
upstairs is not clicking.

Speaker 1 (01:17:40):
I think that's the beauty of conversation, that's the beauty
of humans that we don't think like, yeah, I'm not
going to cancel somebody because they don't think the same
way as me. How ignorant is that? Sure, that's how
you learn people, that's how you understand people, and that's
how you have the skill of conversation. A lot of
times people get mad because when people come sit on

(01:18:01):
this couch, they're like, oh, well, Dre and Lex should
have fought back. It's I am not here to change
your way of thinking. I am here to just listen
to you talk and be like, oh you think this way.
I think this way. This is not I'm not here
to like educate somebody. Poor mind is not here for that.

Speaker 3 (01:18:19):
And the whole time I don't even be hearing how
nobody thinks. That's just y'all exactly.

Speaker 2 (01:18:24):
I was gonna ask y'all, have y'all ever said something
and as soon as it came out of your mouth
you kind of had a little regret, whether it was
you misspoke and you knew that it didn't come out
like you meant it and you thought you might offend
somebody that you didn't intend to.

Speaker 1 (01:18:38):
Yeah, or absolutely yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 3 (01:18:41):
If people say something about it or we cut it out, well,
at this point, yeah, we just be cutting shit out.

Speaker 1 (01:18:46):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:18:47):
Like that's because right after I say it, if I
know I said something, I'm like, oh shit, let me
take shaye right now, time simp.

Speaker 4 (01:18:53):
I'll be saying something so it pops up in the trance.

Speaker 1 (01:18:56):
Yeah yeah, let this out. Make sure I do. Oh yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:19:00):
But when we were younger, for sure, because you know,
back then, we didn't have the luxury of having people
editing our videos and stuff like that, so we would
just upload stuff. And I don't think even back then
I knew that you could cut YouTube videos once they
were up. So I remember we had a specific video
and we had said something about like the LGBTQ community

(01:19:23):
or whatever.

Speaker 1 (01:19:24):
We ended up having to get it cause y'all was
talking spicy. Well, it wasn't that we were talking spicy.

Speaker 3 (01:19:29):
We said h improper term, improper term, and there was
I'll go ahead, I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 (01:19:36):
No, yeah, And I was just gonna say.

Speaker 3 (01:19:37):
We had somebody on the show who was part of
the LGBTQ community and they were just like, yeah, y'all
need to take that out if y'all can, because we
sent him the episode and he was like, yeah, y'all
need to take that.

Speaker 1 (01:19:48):
It was a story i'all told too, shout out to Jerome.
I know it, but Jerome, but because the one thing
I love about him is like he's not here to
cancel us. He's here to educate us. And I think
that's how everybody should be. Instead of calling somebody ignorant

(01:20:09):
and saying you want to cancel them, educate them on
why how did they are ignorant? Yeah?

Speaker 2 (01:20:14):
Educate them because making people are ignorant when it comes
to things like that, Yeah, the terms and stuff and
using the words.

Speaker 1 (01:20:21):
For me, it's important to use the right word. That
is how I feel.

Speaker 2 (01:20:25):
So when I learned something, I want to use the
words because to me, it's like it's nothing to give
somebody respect by calling them the name that they are
asking to be called. It is very I don't like
when people mispronounce my name Kiara. They'll say other things
and it's just like yeah, and it's like, I told you,
what does it cost you to do that? I don't

(01:20:47):
care how you feel about it.

Speaker 1 (01:20:48):
People call me dri Dria off and you know what's crazy.
I know y'all gonna talk about me in the comments.
I get people's name wrong and I'm not kidding. I
funk people's you said it earlier. I can't help it.
I'll be country, I'm stupid, I'm slow, I'm a little.
When I see your name, I say it how I
see it. You know what I'm saying. But when they

(01:21:09):
correct you, yeah, no, I'll be wanting people to correct me,
correct me. I'll be like I'll be trying, y'all, I
really be trying.

Speaker 2 (01:21:19):
Honest mistake. I'm okay if somebody says something to me
to let me know. But when y'all just don't like
it because we got a difference of opinion, Well, girl,
I don't like what you have to say what you
did either, because there are some things I feel very
strongly about, and I will block you and I won't
talk to you.

Speaker 1 (01:21:34):
I don't care who you are, but you not what
it'd be like, I don't even know what you did
because I didn't know that she was here. Actually, what
may be so irritated because if you have such a
strong opinion, go start your own platform. You can. I

(01:21:55):
just think maybe they did, and maybe they did, and
we don't know about it exactly. So that's what I'm saying.

Speaker 3 (01:22:02):
Like, sometimes I just be feeling like when it comes
to people you just don't have to be here versus
spewing negativt.

Speaker 1 (01:22:08):
And I'm not gonna lie. That's why I always say
I think poor minds. We have reached a space where
like sometimes people are tuned in like some it's gonna
be people that tune in today that are here for Kiki. Yeah,
Like I hate poor minds, but I love Kiki. I'm
heading for it. Yeah, but I think that's why I'll
be having a ball over. I love lex P because
they know what lex P is. They know I'm loud,
they know I'm missy. I don't have to hear that

(01:22:29):
because I saw a TikTok today of this girl and
she was making fun of Keiki Palmer because she was
like the god, yes, the guy, Yes, Kiki is so loud.
She saw this, She's so that. It's like, why are
people girls with a lot of personality? People? If you
get on, if we get on your nerves so bad,
just don't watch. Stop trying to make girls with big
personalities dim their lights or tell them to shut up.

(01:22:51):
It's very rude. It's not nice. I think we need
to think of a name for that. You know, they
got fat, phobic, homophobic, personality.

Speaker 4 (01:23:00):
Let me be loud and peace's justus sensitive ears.

Speaker 1 (01:23:04):
Yeah, maybe maybe they just be. But listen, if you
were listening to Key Key Palmer and you don't like
loud people, why the fuck are you tuned in or
turn the volume down? That's I like Key. I agree
she's loud, but I like her.

Speaker 2 (01:23:18):
That's what I'm and I think it's just she has
so I was to her on a lower volume on
some of the other ones, and it's great.

Speaker 1 (01:23:25):
My ears be hurting, y'all.

Speaker 4 (01:23:26):
You are loud, you know, but I would just turn
it down down.

Speaker 1 (01:23:29):
Y'all know, y'all know what the fuck going on. Bitch,
I'm loud. I got the scream. I got to get
the same thing with Wendy Wendy Wow. Love people for
who they are, and if you're not a fan of them,
please just stop stop talking about because I hate when
people say I love you Lex, but I love you Drea.
But house can keep they butts when it comes to me.

(01:23:53):
That's what I'm saying. Leave me alone, Spange. You don't
even gotta say nothing. You got to say nothing.

Speaker 3 (01:24:01):
I love the black people, though they'd be mine. I
love blacking people like and I don't care if it's.

Speaker 1 (01:24:06):
From you food. Welcome to the block.

Speaker 3 (01:24:08):
I love yes because at the end of the day,
yeah you are a viewer, but you're one person. Good
luck fight of the ship next week.

Speaker 1 (01:24:16):
Well yes we did, Yes we did.

Speaker 3 (01:24:21):
Actually, bitch, dra just blocked your assy'll be weird.

Speaker 1 (01:24:27):
Sometimes I think the worst thing like talking about people's looks,
because you know you can't help that. Now, some things
you can't help, you know, with the look of doctors
and things like that. But personality is people's personality. Stop
telling people that are wrong for who they are, Like,
that's just so nat Like she was just going in
on the video and it was just a lie about
you being loud, know about she said, I thought that.

Speaker 3 (01:24:54):
But no, I mean I do feel like you can
change things about your personality. I think people can change
whatever they want to change. You can change things about
your personality. But I think when people are complaining about
things that aren't necessarily harming them, you just don't like
this about this person, you should just stop listening. It's
not like, oh, they have misogynistic views, or it's not

(01:25:16):
like they're putting out bullshit ass propaganda and making women
feel like, oh you don't need to be a wife anymore.

Speaker 1 (01:25:24):
Being a wife is so.

Speaker 3 (01:25:26):
Nineteen sixty three, or whatever the case may be. Like,
if a person just doesn't like you for who you are,
don't listen. But some people do need to change their personalities.

Speaker 1 (01:25:36):
Actually, well they say some people do need to do
some character development. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:25:43):
Now, I also think that there are people out there
who want so badly to be liked. That's a different
type of character flaw to me, because those people, it's
like they're constantly changing their personality. So what I see
critiques about that, I understand that. Or I'm watching something
like different shows, reality shows, for example, and I feel

(01:26:05):
like a housewife walks in and she flip flops.

Speaker 4 (01:26:07):
Depending on who she's sitting at dinner or lunch with.

Speaker 2 (01:26:12):
That is something where I can understand somebody saying something
about the personality.

Speaker 1 (01:26:15):
But again, just don't watch because exactly like, if I
see somebody on a podcast and on this podcast you
this way and on that podcast you that way, Well
who are you?

Speaker 3 (01:26:25):
Yes, across the board, if people don't like you because
you just consistently who you are, well.

Speaker 1 (01:26:31):
You don't like me. You just don't like me. Last week,
I'm gonna be mean this week. I'm gonna go out.
I'm out on cocktails. I was loud in Australia and
I'm a lie when I see you. Yeah yeah, anyways, Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:26:43):
I just think people gotta calm down with being so
critical of everyone else about things that don't really matter.

Speaker 1 (01:26:51):
Just have a good chance. I don't want to have. No,
they don't.

Speaker 3 (01:26:57):
They really don't, which is sometimes I feel like while
we got into these space because we were all just
having fun and it was.

Speaker 1 (01:27:05):
Out of it, I'd be like, it's so nice.

Speaker 2 (01:27:09):
I used to feel that way with friends, and that
was how I landed on the topics for the show,
because when I would talk about my dating experiences or
my sex life, I was feeling a lot of judgment.
And I wasn't even doing nothing too wild cats before Cocktails,
just in my life, okay, because when I started Cocktails,
I had all of this, all of this history to

(01:27:31):
share stories about, so it wasn't even in real time,
but it was like talking to my friends from college
or friends from high school.

Speaker 1 (01:27:38):
Some people would be entertained and other people.

Speaker 4 (01:27:40):
Are like, oh, we need to do this because you'll
never get married, you never get this, or you never
get that. Well, girl, everybody's not trying to collect four
husbands by thirty. You know, like all of us are
in a different path and I'm just having fun. I'm
trying to figure things out. What's wrong with that? So
it was nice to start a show. And at the time,
it's like, Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:27:58):
I'm in this.

Speaker 2 (01:28:00):
Period of like feeling liberated and trying to figure myself out,
but being okay with where I'm at as far as
like my sexuality was concerned, and being single and just
really enjoying that so that I'm not waking up one
day and regretting it and turning into god knows what
in the middle of a marriage. You know, it was
nice when people started listening and then I realized, oh,

(01:28:21):
there's lots of other people out there like me, and
it was easy to look at the good stuff and
tune out the bad stuff. Sometimes it's just like those
negative comments.

Speaker 1 (01:28:29):
I hate that. It does that. It's like a cancer.

Speaker 2 (01:28:31):
You can have two thousand positive comments and you see
those three that stick out that.

Speaker 1 (01:28:37):
Are just nasty. Yeah, it does. I be crying. You
be crying, well, not in the comments.

Speaker 2 (01:28:42):
But just like when but yeah, in real life, like
I've definitely cried over like the comments I'm cuting friendship, Yeah, friendship,
But like when it comes to the comments, it don't
even make me cry. It just be like, fuck you
weak ass house because y'all stupid as fucking y'all can't
do what the fuck I'm doing.

Speaker 4 (01:28:59):
Fuck And I would probably if I said that, I
would read it in that voice.

Speaker 3 (01:29:04):
Yeah, facts, facts, facts, But then I'd be like, but
at the end of the day, like, for real, do
fuck y'all block pab not for my feelings to be hurt,
for real, Like, let me just block her because if
I call me next week, it's gonna hurt my feeling.

Speaker 1 (01:29:21):
Like I think people felt bothering yahyah.

Speaker 4 (01:29:23):
With whatever they choose to say and how they I
remember this girl she had DM me.

Speaker 2 (01:29:28):
This wasn't initially, it wasn't to be me. She wanted
some help or something, right, So she sends me a
GoFundMe and I can't remember what was going on. I
think this was one of the This happened to be
a time when my grandfather got really sick before he passed,
and I.

Speaker 1 (01:29:44):
Forgot about the message.

Speaker 2 (01:29:45):
I'm sorry, but I wasn't in a position to really
help her write that second, I'm trying to help my family.
She sent me an old, nasty message, and then she
was like, don't even bother responding.

Speaker 1 (01:29:56):
I wonder if she watches y'all show. Probably I won.

Speaker 4 (01:30:00):
But she was like, after all I've done for you,
I was like, wait, what by watching the show?

Speaker 2 (01:30:06):
Like that's a trade off. You were asking for help
and you don't know what I'm going through.

Speaker 4 (01:30:12):
I say all that to say, like, she sent me
this long message, told me I gave her my ask
to kiss and all this other stuff, and it was
just like, well, hey, actually, if you would have caught
me at a different time or just sent the link again,
I probably would have sent you some money.

Speaker 2 (01:30:25):
She blocked me, but I was like, you never know
what somebody's going through. So when people are on there
writing these mean comments, is saying all this stuff and
asking for stuff, and then you cussed me out because
I didn't donate.

Speaker 1 (01:30:37):
I didn't cause you to go through what she was
going through. You're not sick.

Speaker 2 (01:30:40):
You made a bad decision. I won't tell all your business,
but you made a bad decision. And who you talking about?

Speaker 1 (01:30:50):
She gonna be in the comments, I'm sure I'm not why.

Speaker 4 (01:30:55):
I never know.

Speaker 2 (01:30:56):
And so when I see people, because I've seen people
leaving comments and stuff, y'all do were just talking about
anyone really like.

Speaker 1 (01:31:02):
Y'all don't realize these real people.

Speaker 2 (01:31:05):
Like you're watching a character on a show, but the
character is attached to a person.

Speaker 1 (01:31:10):
Given don't care.

Speaker 2 (01:31:11):
But we're supposed to care about everything that they think
matters and don't because they want because we're.

Speaker 1 (01:31:18):
The only ones that don't. Yeah, it is very unfair.
All right, So now it's time to get into the bed.
The bed about happy. Okay, does sex count if you

(01:31:38):
didn't finish? Because personally, I don't think it does. I
think it's circumstantial. I hope it is. It better be
turnal means little. All the reason I say it's circumstantial.

(01:31:59):
But because if it's penis shaming.

Speaker 4 (01:32:03):
Now, oh, they said that, I'm always height shaming, y'all.
Niggas be short, and that's just what it is.

Speaker 1 (01:32:09):
They're not saying all I'm not saying some of y'all.

Speaker 3 (01:32:14):
Yeah, I don't want a short king necessarily though, No
medium height.

Speaker 1 (01:32:20):
About to say, you have to say, what boy is
not medium height? He's like five nine, No, he's not
I'm five not She said that, like he's great. Really
nine cow?

Speaker 2 (01:32:38):
Oh, he's being serious cow like five eight in his
shoes he find but that's one.

Speaker 1 (01:32:43):
No, he five eight for real?

Speaker 2 (01:32:45):
No, when you said five nine that part, I was like,
that's in his shoes.

Speaker 1 (01:32:48):
Oh but anyways, anyway, I'm gonna lie. I think it's
tall to me. She's not even going to me. Do
y'all remember that? Mean? No? Okay, So I think it's circumstantial.
So I think if it's the first time y'all had
sex and he didn't make you nothing, unfortunately, though it
is a body, it is a body. But like if

(01:33:11):
like I'm having sex with my man and he came
before me, they didn't count get me some more, you
see what I'm saying. So like if he said, oh, man,
we just had sex this morning, No we did not,
did not. I didn't finish. But if it's like the
first time, you can't say, oh, me and him never
had sex? Why not? I mean you who was there
to see it? Were you there?

Speaker 2 (01:33:28):
You can unless it was a time where I had
a third party witness. Maybe I don't care what y'all said.
There's no proof. I need receipts, timeline screenshots because.

Speaker 1 (01:33:41):
No it's deleted. I don't know.

Speaker 2 (01:33:44):
I don't remember you unless it was just like it
was still very very enjoyable and I wanted to count
it will county.

Speaker 1 (01:33:52):
But if I say no, no, it never happened.

Speaker 2 (01:33:54):
Yeah, I'm real good. I can get real delulu, my body,
my choice exactly. H If I say it, don't count me,
you don't count because who won't tell? Who don't know
besides me and you? It's your word against mine. But
hate unless you got footage.

Speaker 1 (01:34:12):
But like when men none, it's like it's done, like
the sex is finished. It's like that's so upsetting.

Speaker 2 (01:34:17):
That is so rude, because you need to get down
there and do something else. You need to be like
a preacher boy.

Speaker 1 (01:34:22):
I just want to taste it. That's what you need
to go down there and do something. I'm leaving here
with something. Work on that pale moon. You feel me
musty pussy and all. Yeah, I don't care. You should
have got it when it was fresh. Your bad, your bad.

Speaker 2 (01:34:38):
I came here freshidding actually, guys, because I just.

Speaker 1 (01:34:47):
Want you to have it.

Speaker 2 (01:34:48):
Whether it's musty or it's fresh, you just need to
get it you know, different mustard fear.

Speaker 1 (01:34:55):
Sometimes I don't wanted it for you. You have been
walking around the house a little bit sometimes I've been.
You know, I'm thick. Them thighs don't roll together a
little bit. It's not it's muzzing. It's a musk. There's
a diff's a cave musk. It the little pussy musk.
Don't ever hurt nobody. Musk.

Speaker 3 (01:35:16):
It sounds like a great fragrance. Somebody need We used
to trademark thing when I want, when I.

Speaker 1 (01:35:24):
Believe it. Okay, could you imagine come out with pussy musk?
I wonder what it would smell like?

Speaker 2 (01:35:33):
Yeah, like, okay, if you get your pussy musk bottled up,
but then you sprayed up somebody else, because you know
how everybody the body chemistry.

Speaker 1 (01:35:40):
I think did that though it was like a candle
that's like smelled like her or something. Eric, I do.
Pussy on my neck is crazy? There was my neck
has a title on my nail from innovative. Yes, yeah,

(01:36:02):
so yeah, I do think I'm not gonna like if
I caught a body. I caught a body, even if
I know it or not. But like when it comes
to like somebody I'm seriously dating. If you didn't make
me nut, no, you need to give it up again
because that didn't count. That session didn't count. Period.

Speaker 2 (01:36:15):
M Well, I don't like. If I didn't finish, it
does not count. And I mean he could say the
same thing. I don't know why you would. I would
think your dick is broken. Okay, yeah, because like what,
I'm not very good a lot of things when it
comes to dating, but when it comes to that, I
am very confident.

Speaker 1 (01:36:34):
All right, let us know how y'all feel them. I'm
curious sects count if you didn't finish, Yeah, I don't.
So now it's time to get into allow a bow
bow bell. You know, I never do throwbacks. I never
do throwback. So I wanted to do a throwback this

(01:36:58):
week of one of my favorite artists and I never
really talk about him anymore, just because he hasn't dropped
a project in a long time. I was listening to
the Love Hate album by the dream y'all health. Everybody
in the room was like, do y'all realize? Like he
had his songs meshed into each other.

Speaker 5 (01:37:22):
You need a doctor wrong standby, like they blended whether
he was telling a story, they not doing it like
that no more.

Speaker 1 (01:37:35):
She Needs My Love is one of the best songs ever.
The Dreams pen is just I don't think we've seen
anything like that since The Pin the Ear.

Speaker 2 (01:37:50):
I think that is the beauty when people who really
produce and write and sing or perform whichever they do.

Speaker 1 (01:38:01):
I love it.

Speaker 2 (01:38:02):
I love It's just it's different when you know how
to do it all versus you putting out somebody else's stuff,
because then you can always put that extra.

Speaker 1 (01:38:09):
Yes, she Needs My Love. It's one of my favorite
songs on that album Purple Kisses was Abot Fast Car.
I remember the first time hearing Fast Car. It gave
me Prince Bob's Oh my gosh, this is such an
album to listen to that it's so good. And people
always talk about I Love your Girl because they said
that was about Libia and it was his diss to
Lil Wayne. Imagine a nigga singing about you and everybody

(01:38:30):
in the club. This is Lil Wayne during his suck
that nigga. Everybody was saying that, you know what I'm saying,
Like the Dream was giving us hit after hit. This
is the album with no skips, so for the youngis listening.
Y'all need to go listen to the Love Hate album
by the Dream. It came out in two thousand and seven.
History was made.

Speaker 3 (01:38:51):
It was.

Speaker 4 (01:38:53):
Yeah, Nibby on the show, I won't not so bad, Yeah,
because Nivva have some stories on I need, I need.
I just thought about that life and she seems like such.

Speaker 1 (01:39:06):
A she does she does all right, what y'all jam?
So I've been in my afrobeats bag.

Speaker 3 (01:39:14):
We go in to Dinty December this year. We have
to y'all, we have to be in Legos. So my
Bob is with you featuring on my leg by the Beato.

Speaker 1 (01:39:24):
What you know about all my lave? I know a
little song some but y'all, I love this song.

Speaker 3 (01:39:31):
It's just such a good vibe like I feel like
it's given me summer vibes. It's given me I need
to be in Legos. Laid out what I'm telling you.
They got a little dance to it. I'm probably doing
it wrong. That that's that's the old day.

Speaker 1 (01:39:45):
That child.

Speaker 3 (01:39:49):
It wasn't even that song another hit it was, Oh
I know, it wasn't that song. It was no, it
was that though everybody it was, but they was doing
it today was, but I.

Speaker 1 (01:39:59):
Can't remember a song right now.

Speaker 2 (01:40:01):
Do y'all be watching those DJs that's on YouTube at
the parties like live streaming, it's not even well maybe
originally it's live, okay, but some of the I think
something's called like one Bedroom or something like that.

Speaker 1 (01:40:14):
Yes, I do. I watched the ones when they be
at home just mixing.

Speaker 2 (01:40:19):
Yeah, so over the weekend, my friend was showing me
some because they were getting into an argument about my
piano versus afrobeats, and so they were playing the different playlist.

Speaker 1 (01:40:31):
I wish I could remember, but I heard that artist.
Oh my lad, he's there. I never know anybody's name.
I just vibe and moved my head. Y'all need to
listen to a fireboys dm L. He's he's good to
the afrobeats. Okay, he's got something.

Speaker 3 (01:40:48):
That's why I love because we is really each other
herself as hooks weren't safe with Okay.

Speaker 1 (01:40:56):
Good baby?

Speaker 2 (01:40:57):
What because who else you don't think it's weird? This
is a bad bitch picture right here?

Speaker 1 (01:41:03):
I was.

Speaker 3 (01:41:05):
This one.

Speaker 2 (01:41:06):
I wish I still had this so I could wear
it to the concert. But yeah, I got a few
pictures of me who else would I have.

Speaker 1 (01:41:14):
It's mine that way, If it's lost, you know who
it is I'm looking at.

Speaker 4 (01:41:19):
Maybe I got weekly, but she ain't gonna be on there.

Speaker 1 (01:41:24):
She don't even post for pictures.

Speaker 2 (01:41:28):
Saying two Hands to Heaven, Cowboy Carter, that has been
my jam other than I've been listening to that songs.

Speaker 1 (01:41:35):
But two Hands to Heaven, I love that one.

Speaker 4 (01:41:37):
It feels good when the weather is nice and you'll
roll the windows down and just driving down the road.

Speaker 1 (01:41:44):
I love it. And yeah, yeah, I weren't talking album,
so I'm starting to like. You know, when you listen
to the album when it first comes out, you running
in the ground, then you move on. Now I'm back
to Cowboy Card because of course the concert is coming up.

Speaker 2 (01:41:58):
Oh my gosh, Jesus so goodran wait, I got somebody, y'all.

Speaker 1 (01:42:04):
I can't wait for the Tyrant. Did y'all see her
riding that bull? I said? I did? Has been cracking
me up on this. She so funny, She's a hoop hilarious, said,
she gives me a licks. Beginning the tour versus the
end of she was like at first, she was, that's

(01:42:25):
how we first day, last time, Like all right, all right,
but everybody, the last person I want to say, calm
it down. It's a dude. Did y'all see the video.
His name is belly Gang Cushington.

Speaker 2 (01:42:40):
He reminds me of if my little cousin grew up
and leaned into being black versus the other side. Right
because he had redhead. He stopped traffic on the highway.
It was a viral video.

Speaker 4 (01:42:49):
The music is good, So if y'all want some rap music,
a little hip hop, a little hip hop, I think so.

Speaker 1 (01:42:59):
But he just at the beginning is if I actually
he got y'all thought some beats. Yes, he is good.

Speaker 2 (01:43:10):
I don't know the names of the songs, but I
think I listen to everything that's underpopular. But it's belly
Gang Cushington. He looks a little white, but he is
not white, y'all. He's mixed because he do be saying
in words, so just fair warning.

Speaker 1 (01:43:22):
But he's white. He's like a black white. But when
his thought I was thinking that, I was like that ski.

Speaker 4 (01:43:30):
But that's why I said, my little cousin, because you're
little walker.

Speaker 1 (01:43:34):
All right, we're gonna give him a pair. Don't give
him a pair?

Speaker 2 (01:43:36):
And another bout Drew oh, okay, now, before y'all get crazy,
because I know y'all comments be This was just something
fun Me and my sister were doing.

Speaker 1 (01:43:47):
Her husband he actually does rap, and.

Speaker 2 (01:43:49):
I'm gonna listening to some of his new Music's all right,
his name is heavy, but he was making music. So
she just wanted to do this for her birthday. So
he was annoyed, but he helped her write us a
song and we went to the studio and recorded.

Speaker 1 (01:44:03):
We had our cameras, it was out.

Speaker 4 (01:44:05):
We were sunglasses in our sweatpants.

Speaker 1 (01:44:07):
We double cupped.

Speaker 2 (01:44:08):
Uh, we had to double cup syrophone things, but we
had a lean or nothing. We just had to keep
it regular girls. And we got chicken wings because we
just felt like that would just add to like.

Speaker 1 (01:44:19):
And it was a good time. I wish we would
have made a music video. Maybe we'll do it.

Speaker 7 (01:44:24):
We do because ain't nobody really heard it, but it's
available everywhere and you can even add it on Instagram.

Speaker 1 (01:44:35):
I didn't know he was gonna do all that drill.
So we're going to get into our favorite segment of
the week. Make sure you email us at ask poor
Minds at gmail dot com if you want your question answered.
On the show. And if you are a Patreon, remember
you know you can put that in the subject line
and you get to skip the lines. Absolutely. Patreon is

(01:44:55):
the VIP line. Okay, want me to read you yep.

Speaker 3 (01:45:03):
You, Hey, ladies. I have a best friend that I've
known since college. Once we graduated, We've been living in
separate states, but would still maintain a close friendship. The
easiest long distance relationship I've ever had, tbh. But a
few years ago, she and another guy friend of mine
got into a relationship.

Speaker 1 (01:45:23):
From the beginning, I said to leave me out of it.

Speaker 3 (01:45:26):
I would be a listening ear to her concerns, but
would try to give her advice from the perspective of
him being just another nigga. You deserve better, child, move on,
but in the nicest ways, because that's still my nigga,
but also nigga's gonnanig. He was her first and only
serious relationship, and he ended up breaking her heart a
year later. She missed coming to my city one year

(01:45:50):
to help wait what she missed coming to my city
one year to help celebrate my birthday okay because.

Speaker 1 (01:45:56):
The hearter known a birthday was in mom.

Speaker 3 (01:45:59):
Because the heartbreak was fresh and my city reminded her
too much of him, which I understood and forgave. However,
even years later, she always reaches out on his birthday
just to talk and would say subtle things that hints
at insecurity or validation seeking of the women in their
city compared to the women in mind take jabs as

(01:46:21):
the type of people out here, etc.

Speaker 1 (01:46:24):
We're grown.

Speaker 3 (01:46:25):
So it's not like I could have stepped out of
their connection.

Speaker 1 (01:46:27):
In the very beginning.

Speaker 3 (01:46:29):
That girl was me, what would y'all recommend being the
best way to handle these.

Speaker 1 (01:46:35):
Sins?

Speaker 4 (01:46:35):
Must live here and her friend lives somewhere else where,
it is very different.

Speaker 1 (01:46:40):
Yes, that's kind of fucked up.

Speaker 2 (01:46:41):
I would feel away if my friend was acting like that.
And I'm just like, did he put a root on her?

Speaker 5 (01:46:48):
Like?

Speaker 2 (01:46:48):
Why is she so messed up about this one year relation?
If you can't come and celebrate my birthday and you
can't come to this city because it reminds you too
much of him to go outside and touch grass man, and.

Speaker 1 (01:47:02):
I oh that you just need to communicate that with her. Hey,
you know what, I don't like this. This makes me
feel uncomfortable. We underestimate the power of communication. So open
your mouth and tell her I've had situations I've had
I've been in a similar situation like that, and it
was just like, hey, leave me out of it. You
know what I'm saying, Like I value your friendship, and

(01:47:23):
I value your friendship. This didn't work out, but I
have to take a step back, and you know, but
you're years later. Yeah, So I think you need to
have a conversation with her because it sounds like you
don't want to end the friendship. It sounds like you
care about her. Why you just need to be vocal
and tell her how you feel.

Speaker 2 (01:47:40):
Yeah, hopefully when you tell her how you feel and
that you know these things bother, you make it. I
would even say, make it more about your friendship and
less about this guy. It's like you are holding on
to this idea of your former relationship and I'm still
your friend. I'm the one who's still listening to you,
but you won't even spend time with me, Like are

(01:48:00):
we really friends?

Speaker 1 (01:48:01):
Or am I your therapist? Again?

Speaker 2 (01:48:03):
Betterhelp dot com slash poor minds, because that's where you
can go for that, not this. That's not fair and
it doesn't feel good when you're always the one who
has to listen to somebody else's drama or their issues,
and you're all and you will give whatever to your friend.
You help them through stuff. You are supportive, if you
show up, you do all of that and it's not reciprocated.

(01:48:25):
And you should just let her know. You don't feel
like she cares about your friendship enough for you.

Speaker 1 (01:48:29):
And I think it's okay to tell people, Hey, I
think you can be a better friend to me. That's okay.
And a true friend is going to receive that information
and change because they love you. You know what I'm saying.
She might honestly not realize it.

Speaker 2 (01:48:41):
She might really have been through the ringer with him, yes,
and just two in her stuff and nobody's saying anything.

Speaker 3 (01:48:48):
I agree, all right, Keith, Hey, look can they find
you girl and tell them about your new show, tell
them to irritate again and everything.

Speaker 2 (01:48:57):
Okay, So you guys can follow me all the social
media platforms at Kiki said, So K I K I
S A I D S O. My new show, Xoman
Podcast is dropping on Tuesday January Tuesday, June seventeenth, that's
gonna be the audio and then Wednesdays will be video.

(01:49:18):
So the eighteenth and then every Thursday is a new
episode of Cocktail Story Discussions.

Speaker 4 (01:49:23):
I also have a book club and other little things.

Speaker 2 (01:49:26):
So if you don't mind listening to my voice and
you want to connect more, there's so many different ways
to listen to me, see me, and connect with me.

Speaker 1 (01:49:34):
I really do enjoy talking to nice people online, you know.

Speaker 2 (01:49:38):
And so if you just go to my Instagram Peeky
said so or Kiki said so dot com, you can
find all of that stuff there.

Speaker 1 (01:49:44):
And I really hope that when you guys check out
the new show.

Speaker 4 (01:49:48):
That you really enjoy it and leave lots of comments,
nice ones and tell them how much you love.

Speaker 1 (01:49:53):
Me on there.

Speaker 2 (01:49:53):
Because this was not an original idea. I've been hired
to do this job, and I would like, do you
love it?

Speaker 1 (01:49:58):
Yes, you love it.

Speaker 4 (01:50:00):
It's different, it's fun, and I'm excited about it.

Speaker 1 (01:50:02):
This one again.

Speaker 4 (01:50:03):
I'm just talking to beautiful black men.

Speaker 1 (01:50:05):
Love it. I can't wait and I'm excited. Yeah, me too.
I'm excited to see you like in the interview me. Yes,
you do so well at that you do.

Speaker 3 (01:50:15):
And I feel like as your friends who like, we've
been knowing about it for a while now this is
last Yeah, y'all can't wait to watch, and I can't
wait to.

Speaker 1 (01:50:25):
Tuny any y'all. Make sure y'all support my girl and
tune in next week. Are y'all else? Little Chris? Yeah? Man, oh,
I'm early in this song. Okay, here I go. You
know we had to do it again, right? I want

(01:50:47):
you to sing all these niggas men. I guess I'm
up a first. Let me, am, how can you hope
that you're fine? I want to know what you got
in mind? And now I got my feeling like Joey's
c girl. I can't leave you alone. Take a shot
to hit the patron and it's gonna be your breathing out.

(01:51:10):
You crowdy. How my mother end up calling her fornight
she should let your girl say, shake in sea, pull up,
beeps O gun to the GT with me. She there
already ARide. I was like, because what you get inside,
you can't change your mind? On mean the side of fatip.

(01:51:33):
But you got a problems, baby there. Tell me you again.
I'm be the east side boys.

Speaker 4 (01:51:40):
Tell me again my babies, lovers and face. Oh I
got an old baby, yeah, tell me hugain Ma.

Speaker 1 (01:51:53):
Sure you're right, hold before your lovers and faced. Oh
it's a good little bad Sometimes want to be your love,
Sometimes want to be your friend. Sometimes want to hug
your whole hand. Slow deans, want to ric a find,
open up your heart because you said I made you
feel so comfortable, used to play bad thing like you

(01:52:15):
all grown up like Rudy, hugstable. I could be your budd.
You could beat me up, play fight in the darks
and we both make up. I do anything just to
feel your bud while you got me so messed up.
I don't know, but you gotta stop trip man. Be
a good girl.

Speaker 3 (01:52:29):
Now, turn around and get these weirdies. You like it?

Speaker 1 (01:52:33):
Like that, you don't have to fight back. Here's a pillow.

Speaker 3 (01:52:37):
Bite that and I'd be setting separate plays so on
holly separate days.

Speaker 1 (01:52:42):
Your legs could go they separate ways.

Speaker 4 (01:52:46):
Ugging.

Speaker 1 (01:52:50):
Baby friends. Oh it's a good little bab tell me es.

All Episodes

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

Stuff You Should Know

24/7 News: The Latest

Crime Junkie

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}I Got My Own Trench Coat FT. Kiki Said So

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

.css-r6mb8g{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:1;overflow:hidden;}Stuff You Should Know

24/7 News: The Latest

Crime Junkie

All Episodes

I Got My Own Trench Coat FT. Kiki Said So

Stuff You Should Know