Living on the Edge

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:11):
Do you know someone that has an addiction alcohol, drugs,
eating disorder and they were doing so well and then
they fell off the wagon? How do you keep from
falling into temptation? How do we keep from falling into
the very thing that we know we don't want to do,

(00:31):
but find ourselves repeatedly failing. The answer to that is today.

Speaker 2 (00:41):
Thanks for listening to this edition of Living on the
Edge with Chipp Ingram. We are in international teaching and
discipleship ministry motivating Christians to live like Christians. We're in
the middle of our series Balancing Life's Demands. We hope
Chip's words have challenged you to refocus and reprioritize your
life on what matters most and to help others experience

(01:01):
a more joyful and peaceful life. Take a minute after
the message and share it with someone now. You can
do that through the Chip and Graw map or wherever
you listen to podcasts. Thanks for passing on what you're
learning through this series. Well with that, let's join Chip
now for the second half of his talk, how to
keep first Things First?

Speaker 1 (01:20):
How can some of the most committed gifted people in
all the Body of Christ, both in Bible times and
our times. How in the world can you get off track?
And hopefully in your heart of heart, you're saying, I
don't ever want to get off track, and I don't
know how I could get off of track. But gosh,
if Paul thinks he could get off track, and if
all those people the nation of Israel got off track,

(01:42):
and some people that were my heroes got off track,
I guess I could. But how, I mean, what happens
you and I underestimate the power of our own sinful passions.
Paul will pick up the story after reaching in and
giving us his spiritual view of those children of Israel.
Then he in verse six through eleven, he explains, now

(02:04):
these things happened as examples are a type for us,
those things he just talked about. That we should not
crave evil things as they craved, and do not be
idolators as some of them were. As it is written,
the people sat down to eat and drink and stood
up to play. Nor let us act immorlly as some

(02:25):
of them did, and twenty three thousand fell in one day.
Nor let us try the Lord or test the Lord,
as some of them did, and were destroyed by the serpents.
Nor grumble, as some of them did and were destroyed
by the destroyer. Now, these things happened to them as
notice the repetition an example, and they are written for

(02:46):
our instruction upon which the ends of the ages have come.
I want you to circle the word example first line
and in the last and once you realize his point
is on making the example. Now, if we had a
lot more time, and for some of you that really
loved to do Bible study, did you notice a lot
of these phrases he is, I mean, he's pulling out

(03:07):
the whole big stories of the Old Testament, right and
so here let me do some quick Bible study with you.
Just okay, I want you to put a line under
crave evil things. It was what he's saying is at
there are passions. In fact, it's an intensive form. There's
a word for cravings or lust or passions. This has

(03:29):
a prefix. It's an intensified form. So he's saying they
had supercharged lusts and passions and drives that they fulfilled
outside of God's plan. And then he goes on to say,
put a box around the word idolators at the heart,
always at the heart of us, falling away from the

(03:52):
living God. Is we make someone or something the idol
or the God in his place? And guess what it
can be your eight Are you ready? It can be
your ministry. Yes, it can be your money, It can
be a car, It can be another woman, another man.
But anything or anyone that takes the rightful place of

(04:12):
your loyalty and allegiance is an idol. He's saying, we
have passions, we have drives. We're tempted in the world
to satisfy him in different ways. And so what's he saying.
He says, they come out as idolatris as some of
them did. Then notice he's going to I'm gonna ask
you to put a gosh, have we done lines, We've
done boxes. Let me give you three more boxes, because

(04:32):
I don't know whether we ought to do lines, circles,
or boxes. But when he says, nor let us act immrally,
we put a box around act i morally. That's the
lust of the flesh. Skip down and put it's hard
to put a box around, but try or test the Lord.
He's talking about the story of the envy of Moses.
That's the lust of the eyes. And then put a

(04:54):
box around the word grumble that's the pride of life.
We want that power. And all I'm telling you is
this is just so basic, and He's given us this picture.
He says, you constantly underestimate the power of your own
sinful passions. But it's an amazing thing is when we
know there's going to be my behavior is going to

(05:15):
be brought into the light, it really helps me not
go into the darkness. I mean, when you know there's
and you're not gonna pretend, you're not gonna fake it.
And so all I'm saying is, and you know what,
I'm trying to persuade you. Are you starting to get persuaded.
I'm trying to tell you that you can't live without this. Well,
I don't care what new lines do you say. I

(05:38):
you know what I'm gonna put first things first, I'm
gonna develop that discipline. It's gonna be in this area,
in that area, and I'm gonna honor God. I implore
you to say, who is going to go there with me?
What group of guys can I do this with? What
group of women as a woman can I do this with?
And in cases, what set of couples could we dream
some dreams together? And in appropriate ways, be very honest.

(06:01):
The fourth reason is because we constantly overestimate our ability
to handle temptation. We underestimate the power of our passions
or our sinful passions, and we overestimate our ability to
handle temptation. What's Paul say? He applies his passage. Therefore,
let him who thinks he stands take heed. Let's the

(06:22):
fall you might jot down Hebrews three thirteen. It's one
of my favorite passages. It says, encourage one another day
after day, least any one of you be hardened by
the deceitfulness of sin. You know, the word deceitful means
it's you don't know, you don't get it. And notice
it's about your heart. It always starts there. Your heart

(06:44):
gets hardened. In fact, Jesus said that is the core
reason for divorce. He says, men's men's heart, that women's hearts.
They get hardened. And that's why we're to be tenderhearted
forgiving one another, just as God and Christ also has
forgiven us. But I encourage get that, but encourage one another.

(07:05):
And encouragement isn't like high fiving. Oh you're wonderful, I'm wonderful.
Isn't life happy?

Speaker 2 (07:11):
That?

Speaker 1 (07:11):
This word is that para colle Oh, it's translated in
some places as the word for the Holy spirit. It's
one who comes alongside. Encouragement is is you come alongside
another person. And sometimes it means you tell them really
hard stuff. Sometimes it just means you listen and support,
and sometimes you just say, I'm so proud of you.
But it's doing life together, it's caring. I just I

(07:41):
just want in my heart and mind to just sort
of say to myself, Chip, on any given day, in
the exact right circumstances, you are capable of sin beyond
your wildest imagination. So you need to make predecisions about
where you'll go and what you'll do and who you'll

(08:02):
hang with. And you need to have a group of
people that you can surround yourself with that love you,
that you invite into your life and say, you know
what you know, here's my heart, here's my life, here's
my motives, here's my struggles, this is what I'm going
through in my life.

Speaker 2 (08:21):
Where you're going.

Speaker 1 (08:24):
And if you don't have that, you'll start faking it
and you'll have these temptations and you'll have thoughts and
you'll feel like, well, I can't. Well, actually, at least
to the very next and last reason, the fifth reason
that we need biblical accountabilities. We naively believe our struggles
and temptations are unique. See, I need it because I

(08:47):
think I mean well, whether I like it or not,
I've been a pastor for like twenty five years, and
you know, people view me as a Christian leader, So
I guess I'm a Christian leader. And then I have
this profile Christian leaders. I bet they never struggle with this,
and I guess now I'm a Christian leader. So if
I ever struggle with that, someth must be wrong with me. Wrong.
I'm a man, and you're a man, or a woman

(09:11):
or a student. And no temptation has ever taken me
or ever taken you. But what is common to man,
But God will with the temptation to provide a way
of escape that you might be able to endure it.

Speaker 2 (09:30):
You're listening to Living on the Edge, and we'll get
back to Chip's message in just a minute. But first,
if you're in a small group and are looking for
what to study next, consider the balancing life's demands small group.
The resource for this series will help you realign your
priorities and experience a more joy filled life. Stick around
after the teaching for complete details, but for now here

(09:52):
again is Chip.

Speaker 1 (09:55):
One time someone said, you know, I don't know how
you do it, Chip, because sometimes when you talk, I
feel like you're just talking to me, like you're reading
my mind. This verse is my preaching verse. Now this
may sound crazy, but any area I've ever struggled with
in my life, I make this assumption, so does everybody else.

(10:18):
And then it's like, I'm not you know, I've told
you I'm insecure just like everybody else in this room,
and I'm not overly vulnerable. I'm just thinking to myself,
Let's see if every guy I've ever met, apart from
the comatoset guy, struggle with lust at some level. Every
woman I've ever met, at some level struggles with self image. Okay,
everyone has gets overextended. I mean, everyone has unresolved anger

(10:40):
issues in your marriage, Everyone has some some season in
your marriage. You have problems with communication, sex, in laws,
and kids, right, I mean duh. So I don't think
it's not like oh, I mean, you know, when you
start talking about a few of those things, they're like, oh, gosh,
what's wrong with him? You know what I get is, ah,
he's one of us. You know, temptation is not the

(11:02):
same thing as sin. Temptation means there's an opportunity to
be lured away in some way. You know, looking at
a very attractive woman and going wow, very attractive is
not the same as lusting for her. And you know,
as a mature believer, I can say, Lord, man, I

(11:22):
sunsets are beautiful, and the trees are beautiful. She's beautiful,
and that's look number one. Now I want to thank
you for what you made beautiful for me, Teresa. Because
we naively believe our struggles and temptations are unique, we
start to hide the ones that we think we're too

(11:42):
mature or we shouldn't have. And I just want to
go back to secrecy is where the enemy will bombarde
you with doubts and struggles and condemnation. You know what,
when you have a struggle, let me tell you what
the spirit does. It's specific. It's sin, righteousness, judgment, repent.

(12:06):
Because I love you. Condemnation is vague. You're a terrible person.
You know You're allows you this, You're allows you that.
You know why God puts you on this it's general,
it's vague. Condemnation makes you not like you, not like God,
and not want to pray. Conviction is a light shining
on something that needs to be addressed, and you lift
it into the light and just like bacteria out of

(12:27):
the darkness when the light hits the bacteria, and so
that the fellowship can be restored. If you confess, agree
with God about your sins. He's faithful and just to
what forgive, Release you of all your sins, and cleanse
you of all unrighteousness. What's he say about this biblical accountability?
He says, what's the summary. Therefore, my beloved flee from idolatry.

(12:50):
See at the heart of it, at the heart of
it all is that I end up me worshiping me.
It's really not about the sex. It's about the ego.
It's really not about the food. It's about the ego.
It's not about the business and the work. It's about
the ego. At the end of the day, the core
of sin is going to come back to in any
and all of these is God gets taken off the throne,
my way, my control, my agenda, a world system LUs

(13:13):
to the flesh lust of the eyes, pride of life,
promising me security, significance, value, and worth apart from God.
I bite on the bait, I make an idol, and
then Paul says, and if that happen, that I get disqualified,
disqualified from my relationship of eternal life. No, disqualified as

(13:34):
a useful vessel of honor, and disqualified not only of
use by God but bringing incredible, incredible pain in the
lives of others. There is no such thing as private sins.
Every sin I commit, every sin you commit, has ripples.
Some of them you may never see, but they have ripples.

(13:56):
Even the ones that no one else has found out about,
they have ripples. So I've given you five reasons to say,
Dear God, I not only want I am committed to
having biblical accountability in my life. I mean, Paul needed it.

(14:17):
I need it. One Corinthians ten outlines clearly we all
need it. So how do you get it? How does
it work? Let me give you some practical I guess
I call them spiritual tips on getting there. Number one,
it begins at home. When we talk about accountability, too
often we jump into places outside. Start with the people

(14:40):
that you live with. I think there's appropriate things as
men better off to share with men and women with women.
I am very super open with my wife, but there
are certain things that you know what, my wife is
not a man, she doesn't really understand, and I need
some guys that I can share that with and her
vice versa. But I think you got a start in
your home, your marriage partner or your roommates. Second, it's

(15:04):
an atmosphere of love, tender, compassionate, someone who's rooting for you. Third,
it must be voluntary and by permission. By the way,
I think this is one you need to really negotiate.
It is really hard. Some of you are in these
sort of semi imbalanced kind of relationships and you know,

(15:26):
you're the wife and you're in the Bible and you
love God, and you're going to church, and your husband's
sort of, you know, not so close, and you know
it's like, as he gets up, here's a Bible passage opened,
and here's a CD by so and so, And by
the way, honey, I will all pick up your favorite meal.
If you just go to church with us and just
forget that jazz. Let God work you, let your chaste

(15:49):
behavior and how you live say tell you what if
this love and Jesus makes you love me the way
you love me? The honey, you just keep going to
church and I might even check it out God, and
vice versa, so you know, you need It's got to
be by permission. We don't go out and hold other
people accountable. Uh. For it must be specific, not generic.

(16:15):
I mean this sort of Hey, why don't you meet?
We all have coffee, and so, how are you doing
in general? I'm doing pretty good in general? How are
you doing general? I'm doing pretty good in general? So
what do you think of those falcons in our place?
They actually want a game? Amen? Or hey, you think
the Cardinals are you know, gonna be any good this year?
That quarterback change? Or I don't know, have you seen
the last of Southern Living magazine? I thought it was

(16:35):
so cute the way that you know, and and it
good to be in these accountability groups just makes them
feel warm all over, you know, you know, And and
then we we kidder sells thinking that something's happening. It
needs to be specific. You might even put some things
in writing and say, you know what, as we meet together, Uh,

(16:57):
these are the things we want to cover. I have
a fellow he's that dad figure and I'll never forget
I was in Dallas and he has permission and we
talk on a regular basis and he's real funny. He
has a flat top and kind of looks at me
like this, and he said, okay, why we went on
our food? Are you ready? And you know it's like
a game show or something. I said, a see, man,

(17:17):
what are you doing? He goes, well, are you ready?
So yeah, he takes his wallet and he has this
little laminated thing and real small print news questions Question
number one, have you any time since we last met
been on the internet and watched anything inappropriate? Question number two?
And I mean he goes through my thought life, my time,

(17:40):
my money, my ego, and then the last question after
is like five basic areas. He goes question number six,
have you lied to me? On questions one through five?
And you know what, he's kind of a he knows
me and he's kind of goofy. He knew be uncomfortable.

(18:01):
He knew it would be the kind of thing that
you know, it's it's always awkward, but guess guess what,
I got a safe place to go. Anybody ask you
those questions? You asking anybody those questions. According to this passage,
until the day you take your last breath and I
take my last breath, there'll be struggles in those areas, right,

(18:21):
So it needs to be specific. And by the way,
every time, it doesn't need to be like hardcore. All right,
you know, but you know, you know you you build
relationship and you build trust. But it's we're going to
be specific about some things. My rule of thumb is
no more than four people unless there's unique relationships of

(18:41):
closeness that allow for more. And I think two is
not great because you start getting blind spots for one another.
I mean it's okay. I think mentoring relationships are great,
but for accountability, there's something healthy about having someone listen
to stuff and say because because what you do is
you're vulnerable when you're really open and you only have
one set of eyes looking at what's going on. I

(19:03):
want a couple set of eyes. So I have kind
of relationships with a handful of people like this. The
conclusion making sincere commitments is tough, keeping them is next
to impossible alone. There's hope. Many start well, you finish well.

(19:27):
You can be the exception. You can be the exception.
There is no temptation taken to you. There is no
trial taken to you, but such as common demand. And
with that temptation, God will provide a way of escape.
And I'm telling you the way to escape is of
a chord of three is not easily broken.

Speaker 2 (19:55):
You're listening to Living on the Edge with Chipp Ingram
and the message you just heard, how to keep first
Things First, is from our series Balancing Life's Demands. Chip
will join us in studio to share some insights from
today's talk in just a minute. Are you exhausted juggling
your job, kids, marriage, and everything else you're responsible for.

(20:15):
Do you wish there was a way to relieve that
stress and live with a little more joy? Well, in
this series, Chip reveals what a balanced life looks like
and how you can rearrange your priorities around what matters most.
Hear how to experience the joy filled and satisfying life
God desires for you to have. Now, if you've missed
any part of Chip's teaching, catch up any time on

(20:37):
the Chip Ingram Map. Well, Chips here in studio now
to talk about a resource we have that complements our
current series.

Speaker 1 (20:43):
Thanks Dave, you know in today's world, it's easy to
get pulled in a million different directions. We're family, church, kids' activities,
and everything in between. And while all of these can
be good things, they leave you feeling depleted, drained, and
often not connected to the people that you love the most.
Let me tell you something that is not God's will

(21:07):
or God's plan for your life, and we have a
resource specifically designed to help you cut through the chaos
and discover God's priorities for you and your family. Balancing
Life's Demands is a small group study that will help
you determine your should dues in Christ from the cold
dues that will steal your joy. If you want to
get out from under the pressure and enjoy the life

(21:29):
that God has in store for you, Balancing Life's Demands
is the perfect tool.

Speaker 2 (21:34):
That's absolutely right chip well. To get your hands on
this small group study, go to Living on the Edge
dot org or call us a triple eight three three
three six zero zero three. I think you'll be blown
away by how this resource will declutter your day to day,
prioritize what matters most, and lead you to a more
peace filled life. To order, the Balancing Life's Demands small group,

(21:57):
visit Living on the Edge dot org or called Triple
eight three three three six zero zero three app listeners
TEPS special offers.

Speaker 1 (22:07):
As we close today's program, we've talked about the five
specific reasons in the last two broadcasts of why we
need accountable relationships, and then we have defined and I
think this definition is really important. Accountability is not other
people playing the Holy Spirit and nagging my life. Accountability
is me inviting trusted people into my life to help

(22:30):
me keep my commitments to God. Now here's the other thing.
There's a lot of quote accountability groups, all kind of
small groups, but I will tell you my experience has
been that there's a big problem in these groups. It's
called lying. Okay, I'm dead serious. Is I have been
in accountability groups and have good friends and accountability groups

(22:52):
that people who walked off with someone else's mate, people
who have been involved in fraud at significant levels were
in the accountability group. I think it's so important that
we create an atmosphere where we really accept one another
for who we are and the struggles that we have.
But it's also an atmosphere where there's some tough love

(23:13):
that goes on. You know, so often I think in
the name of caring for one another, loving one another.
I've been in groups where you know, someone shows up
seven eight weeks in a row, doesn't do the lesson,
doesn't memorize the passage, doesn't be very authentic, and everyone
just keeps giving them a pass like, well, you know,
we're Christians, we don't want to be too hard on him.

(23:34):
Guess what, Sometimes you need to be hard on people
that you love. All discipline for the moment seems not
to be joyful but sorrowful. Yet those who've been trained
by it afterwards yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness. I
can look back at four or five major times in
my life where people said things to me that I
wanted to get up and hit them. I mean, I

(23:54):
can't believe they said that, And the reason I wanted
to get up and hit them was because they were
absolutely lutely right. When you find people defensive and rationalizing,
I will tell you underneath that is unknown, unresolved patterns
of sin that need to be addressed. Let's really love
each other and stop playing games. Let's be romans twelve

(24:17):
Christians from the inside out.

Speaker 2 (24:19):
Great challenge chip. In fact, we'd like to help you
become a more dedicated follower of Jesus, so check out
Chip's broadcast series True Spirituality. As you walk through Romans
chapter twelve with Chip, you'll uncover the profile of an
authentic disciple. To listen to this series True Spirituality, go
to Special Offers at Livingontheedge dot org or through the

(24:43):
Chip Ingram map. Until next time. This is Dave Druy
saying thanks for listening to this edition of Living on
the Edge.