Truth or Dare

Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
I'm pretty bad. Hey, everybody, welcome to another episode a
pretty messed up on I Heart Radio. Um, it's your

(00:23):
boy a J with Cheryl Burke and Renee Lazando. Um,
what's up, guys? You know great, it's so nice to
see you without sunglasses on a J. Well, I'm in,
I'm inside, so there's really no purpose wearing them. The
last few times it was sunny, I was tired, you know, kids, man, kids.

(00:43):
Oh you guys were shooting that video. How is it going? Hi? Renee? Hey,
how are you? The video went freaking amazing? Um? Yeah,
I let's show her rough. You know what, I'm gonna
send the most recent rough and yeah, it's if it
doesn't make you smile the whole time and like bring

(01:04):
you joy, then I didn't do what I was trying
to do. No, then I just have a black heart,
you know. Then there's that, there's that no, no, no, yeah,
I'm still licking my wounds. A J and I had
tied for three games straight on the golf course and
kick my butt two days ago. So is that not normal?
Like who normally wins? Well, no, we go back and forth.

(01:27):
He but order has been restored. Yeah, let's just say
that he beat me at his home course. And I'm
gonna beat you guys when you take me golfing soon. Right, Yes,
we are going to take you golfing and film the
whole thing. Film the whole thing. It's going to be
a freaking experience. Oh it's going to be great, man

(01:47):
like the whole like sixteen, how many holes are there's
there's eights? Oh, funny thing, you guys. Not to switch subjects,
but remember last week where a fan wrote a question
for a J about what song does he identify the
most with? And her name was Dinata Um. Anyways, funny
story about her. We were sitting in the recording studio

(02:10):
in Malibu and all of a sudden, girl walks right
straight into the studio and she says delivery. And she
walked straight to a J hends him a sandwich, and
Aja goes, I didn't order anything. She goes, oh, well
it was I was supposed to deliver it. And then
she walked out and I was like, what was that?

(02:30):
Because no one could ever get straight in. I don't
know how she got in, but anyways, I followed her
out and she was high fiving another girl. She didn't
see me. I opened the door, and she's like, I
met him. I met him. Turns out that's the same girl.
I don't encourage that. So at the time I posted

(02:53):
on Instagram us in a in in my studio writing
vibing out, I didn't turn off the location notifications, so
the address pops up, anybody can show up. And she
was sweet. No, she was very nice and you know,
but still and she did spend some money on a sandwich,

(03:14):
so I mean, that's all you aj. You gotta be careful.
I mean, I gotta admit though I didn't eat the sandwich. Okay, Well,
to be sweet of her means you don't know. But
like she definitely knows how to get into places. That's amazing.
She was very very resourceful. I didn't say that fans
are the craftiest. They are, no. I mean, like even

(03:34):
outside our dance studio, remember a j there this one fan. Um,
she was really sweet, but like I'm not one day
was she not there even on our days off. She
was there through Leslie and she was really really sweet.
But like they are die hard Backstreet Army. They are
the reason why we're still doing what we I mean,

(03:56):
if there was now no dedication and loyalty, like the beat,
like your kids. It's a good thing, though i'd be
selling cars and ship. Um. You know, you think about
all the musical acts that have come and gone, do
you know? So I always think about that When I
think of the Backstreet Boys, I think Jesus, you know,

(04:17):
there a lot of one hit wonders, you know. And
but you guys have just maintained for all those years.
So in a relationship as well, you guys are still together.
That's awesome. Yeah, we haven't killed each other yet, so
that's you know, we definitely still early. Yeah, it's it's
still very very early in the game. Now, you guys,
do mind if I just give a little shout out
to Tim from Arkansas. He sent me a message through

(04:42):
Instagram yesterday. He celebrated eleven years sober. He said, listening
to the podcast every Monday, him and his wife, uh
get a lot of inspiration. And he said something really
cool if you don't mind, eleven years, No, no, eleven months, sorry,
eleven months. I was like, damn, my bad, eleven months.

(05:04):
But congratulations that's great. Yeah, man, isn't that awesome? And
he said love y'all's podcast. I'm celebrating eleven months sober today.
The fight is real, but it's the little things I
do that keep me going the right direction. I just
it warms my heart because you know, you guys know
it's not an easy thing to stop, you know. And

(05:25):
and so congratulations Tim much congratulations actually done. So listen.
So there's this there's this thing trending on social media
that we're going to try, um, which is basically kind
of a true or false deal, you know, assumptions basically

(05:45):
about each of us, um. And I'm very curious to
see what people's assumptions are about us, um and maybe
we'll learn a little something about us that we didn't
know about each other. So when we come back from
this break, we're gonna dive right in and uh, yikes,
we shall see. And you have to be honest. That's

(06:06):
the thing. You've got to be rigorously honest. It's also
part of part of our recovery is to be rigorously honest. So, well,
what happens. So I'll take a look a quick little
break and when we come back, we're gonna dive into
the good ship. All right, we are back from break,

(06:31):
and uh, we are about to dive into these assumptions
that you guys have submitted about each of us, and
we're gonna do this round robin style. So Renee is
gonna ask me, I'm an asked share bear, and share
Bear is gonna ask nay nay. So uh So I'm
gonna start with some of these questions, I mean, assumptions,

(06:52):
and then I'm also going to hear your answer, and
if it's not true, I will correct you. Okay, okay,
j a J hates being alone. True, I am getting
better at it though. Yes, I am definitely more comfortable
having some quality me time. Yes a J. Sings in

(07:15):
the shower. Yet well no, actually I don't. I can't,
you can't. It's weird though, Like so many, so many
of my friends were shocked when I told them I
didn't sing to my kids when they were babies, like

(07:36):
I never like, I wouldn't like put them to bed
and sing them lullaby. I never ever did that. I
sing more with my girls now. I mean I go
to clubs and not dance, So I get it. Yeah,
I just I don't know why, but I but I
do sing in public if I go on a date
with my wife, just to piss her off because it
just draws more attention to me. And you know, I've

(08:00):
told this to people. Have never a j doesn't walk
around singing, which is nuts. He lived with me for
a year. One time I heard him sing and he
was singing I want it that way, and I could
hear him through the walls and I can't tell you
why he was singing. Okay, wait, do you ever sing

(08:24):
like an instinct song randomly? No? Yeah, oh yeah, I'll sing,
I sing good music, I'll sing whatever, it doesn't matter.
Fanom of the Opera, Oh I love me some Family
the Opera you just actually hit Did you know that?
Or was that randomly? Pick random? Because he loves Phantom
of the Opera, like like loves it freakishly. It's on

(08:46):
my bucket list of like if I ever did Broadway,
that would actually I could you did that in the
video in your music video? Yeah? Yeah, I mean I
think I'm I'm out. I'm kind of past the age
range for the Phantom on Broadway. I think it's like
thirty five is the cap. But you don't know how
you have a mask on your good Okay, women still

(09:09):
throw themselves at you and their bras yes, that is
true on the street, but in the public bathrooms that's weird. Yeah,
without sounding arrogant, I've been with them where I've seen them,
the word would be swoon, right Yeah, okay, you could

(09:33):
say swoon. Okay. A J is strongheaded like stubborn, Yes,
very true. Um, I've gotten better with it, but I'm
definitely Um. I guess it would depend on the scenario.
But yeah, I can. I can be stubborn. I just

(09:54):
asked my wife. Yeah, I can go along with that.
When you teach him the samba, he gets really yeah. Um.
So favorite BSB song to perform is larger than life? False? Um,
it is not my favorite. Uh. My favorite to this

(10:16):
day still is Get Another Boyfriend. It was never a single. Um,
it was off the Black and Blue c D. It
took me god four tours to convince the guys to
finally put it back in the show. The first time
it came back was in the Vegas Residency and it
is still currently in our DNA World tour. That's happening

(10:37):
right now. So well, come on, don't hold back, give
us a little a little what why no no sing?
Um sing? Shoot? I forgot the words hold m oh
let's talk about one Bay Bay. You gotta hear me out?
Do you really want to be the last? Know what

(10:59):
it's all about? Yeah? Put the cha that. Yes, have
we talked about this? Do you do you sing? Or
you don't sing? I embarrass my own self when I sing.
Have have you heard Sheryle sing? Absolutely not? And you've
heard me sing? Be honest, who's worse. The two of
you could easily sing to together and nobody would be

(11:22):
able to tell it apart. So it's a race to
the box. Amazing, So you sing? Let me see if
I sing like I'm tone deaf. That's why we dance. Yeah,
I think you're right. Blows my mind because he's an
amazing songwriter, which means back when him and I would
write together, he would come up with a melody, but

(11:44):
it was horrible, but I could decode it and make
it sound right. Should we give him an example? Okay?
We Actually this is how I presented it to him,
and then this is how it turned out. So I'm
about to embarrass myself. Yes, you are right. I'm so
excited about this. And then I can't believe I put

(12:04):
myself in this situation. You ca't back? Oh, my god. Okay,
this is what I came to him with, um singing
in the rain. Nobody can see. So I was crying
in the rain. No, no, you're right, crying in the rain.
The one can see my pain I wanted. Okay, now

(12:25):
you do like it. I took it crying in the rain.
Nobody could see my pain. I want to be with you,
but I know you sounded like a lullaby. Yeah, and
he'll he'll still tease me about that. I'll do something

(12:47):
that's really kind of dumb or embarrassing and then he'll
go like this, crying in the rain. All right, all right,
it's my turn, hopyl. Well that didn't sound right. Wa
wait on, there's a couple more. Are we falling behind
on time? Are we supposed to do every other? Question?
Like are supposed to go in a circle or just
like do it all? Did it his way? So I

(13:09):
thought we were supposed to go over in a circle.
But okay, so wait, have we fallen behind? Do we
need to make up time? Can I do a couple
more assumptions? Or how's it going here? I think we
should just be like rapid fire. Okay, rapid fire, here
we go. Um, let's see a J is freakier then
he lets on. False Agreed, a J is really a

(13:32):
member of the Mile High Club. False sadly, really, I've
I've tried. AJ is afraid of the dark. False AJ
is really an introvert. False. A J cries during sad movies. Um,

(13:54):
a J would love to move back to the East Coast. False.
A J wanted to do d w TS ever since
he watched Nick season True even before. Well yeah, but
that was like the real like yeah, man, I could
do this, you know. Yeah? All right, all right, share Bear,

(14:19):
here we go. Cheryl is super emphatic, caring and has
to be careful of people taking advantage of her. True, Okay,
all right, people back for season thirty of Dancing with
that's the really deep guys. She's never going to go away. Baby,
you know it's not h don't o. God, I don't know.

(14:42):
I don't have a contract, so technically no, okay, So
if it's up to the fans, you'll be yeah, I
mean it's up to the fans. I'd be judging, just alright, alright.
Share Bear is the most active one of the group
in what way. I guess we can't ask him is
the most active active. I'm like active, like I'm act

(15:03):
my brains really active. So I'd say, yes, yes, yes,
Well that's like, that's like, do you know what a
d h D stands for, Cheryl Burke? It stands for attention.
Oh my god, that's hysterical. M Cheryl would never do
another season of Dance Moms. False. No, I would totally

(15:25):
do Dance Moms. You would, okay? All right? Oh? Cheryl
is an adventurous eater. No, no, you don't like to
try new ship. I barely eat. I barely eat. That's
a good answer. Um, I mean I love Filipino food.
If that's adventurous, go ahead, okay. Cheryl prefers fuzzy socks

(15:47):
over bedroom slippers. Someone's got a foot fetish. Um, I
prefer fuzzy socks depending on if my dog pissed in
that area or not, because it just absorbs right in
there and correct the Cheryl had another BSB dance ready
to go for a j False. Yeah we we. We

(16:10):
didn't trying to think of our freestyle. I think maybe,
well maybe if we would have anything. Yeah, we've been
Uh oh, I I think I know the answer of
this one. Cheryl talks to her dog like a human
when no one's around. Yes, I know I have this
problem with I'm talking about this through therapy right now.
It's a problem. Okay, here's a good one. I think

(16:36):
I know the answer to this one too. Cheryl does
not like the reptiles her husband has. I love them.
I don't love to touch them, but they're great from
a distance. Okay, like some people most shit, this one
is interesting. Cheryl is the reason her and Matthew broke

(16:59):
up the first time. Yep, nail didn't. Okay, Oh, another
good one. Shit Iron zering favorite partner on Dancing with
the Stars. God, you guys said, this isn't so deep,
putting you on blast. Don't know. Hey, there's no like,

(17:20):
there's no dislike, there's no good, there's no bad. That
pretty much answers that question. You really And I don't
want to get a letter from the BBC again, Just
kidding again, damn Okay, Cheryl has caught pro dancers on
Dancing with the Stars hooking up with their celebrity partners.
I didn't catch them so in false No, Okay, that's

(17:43):
a different question than what you know what I'm saying.
I'm going like I'm taking you guys literal. Okay, Cheryl,
it's your turn to ask. Okay, that was some real
deep ones got right for the ju. Yeah, that's just
my lifecause you're so emphatic, because there's so many unanswered questions.

(18:05):
Okay ready, Renee, nay nay, let's do this. Renee loves
to mentor people in values human connection more than anything
I had to say. I've always loved the whole mentoring thing.
Cinema Paradis so it is one of my favorite films
of all time, and it's a mentoring a projection as

(18:27):
the mentors a young boy who becomes a film director.
Most of the films I like have a mentoring part
to it. So yes, that's absolutely yes. Renee doesn't get
angry often, but when he does, he really does. No
me losing losing it like a j I think we'll

(18:50):
tell you this. It's not like other people losing it.
It's not like, oh my god. It's more like I'm
really angry right now. You know, it happened the other
it did it did? It happened the other day. And
I was like, I've known Renee twenty years. I've never
seen him getting like like a like a like a

(19:13):
mood and he his wife was purposely testing him and
I wasn't in the mood. He was getting more and
more agitated and was getting lower and lower. Let's let's
let's put this into context. So I was getting dressed,
Britt was on face time with a J. And then

(19:34):
I wasn't already in the mood because our plans to move,
we're out of this house in one month, but things
changed and they're not going to have this construction done,
so we're going to be living there during construction. So
I was like, oh, I know that that could turn
very stressful. So then eight then Britt says to a J, Hey,
can uh renee come live with you for like a month?

(19:57):
And I go, a J. She's not, She's just kidding.
She goes, no, seriously, can you guys go on a
golf trip for a month or something? And I'm like, honey,
please stop. And that was me getting mad. Really, that
was it. If I saw some passion come out of
you the other day when we were interviewing about to

(20:20):
interview Holly. I remember like we were just discussing something
and then like you just get passionate. You're not but
your tone of voice is very um it's the same.
It's always soothing, you know, but you still have a
very passionate person. I can tell, well, I've definitely lost
it with people, so I'm not going to claim like,
oh yeah, I'm always super mellow. Most of the time,

(20:40):
I'm mellow. So even like with my daughter when I
go honey, please, she's like, oh my god that she's yelled. Yeah, sorry,
or oh my god, I'm allergic okay, sorry? Are you
allergic to bees? Yeah? Yeah, that's why are you sick? Person?
You so yeah, but I'm sure people listen to you

(21:03):
when you are like stern, you know, at least, yeah,
it's sound mad all the time. Whoever does listen to me?
I listened to you, okay. Next, Renee's mustache gives him
an alter ego. You know, I don't. I would say no.
I used to have really long hair and how long

(21:25):
I used to and I wouldn't cut it because I
thought that it was my creative antenna. Like I was like,
if I cut it, I won't be creative anymore, which
makes zero sense. He looked like Jesus basically, flies, are
you allergic to flies? To anything that flies Okay, next

(21:45):
m Renee prefers checkers or chess. Not true, which one.
I'm still waiting to get a chess game going. I'd
prefer chess much more, not just the actual game. But
I love chess, you know, business, the chess moves, the
gaming kind of thing. I love it. So you know,
you can get paid for gaming nowadays. Later. Absolutely, Renee

(22:09):
has a book of inspiring quotes he keeps around. No,
Renee is a great dancer. Renee is a great dancer
with great rhythm. Say, used to be a professional dancer.
I saw a video of you recently. Stop it. Yeah, dude,
you can still pop and lock and all that ship
like it's like nobody has. Yeah, totally you got damn. Yeah.

(22:33):
I don't do it often anymore, but I love it.
You just give yourself a compliment, Renee, Just do it.
Do what? Give yourself a compliment? Love yourself. No, No,
it's not like I don't deserve it. It's just like
I feel like, as a dancer, to claim I'm still
a dancer feels a bit fraudulent because he's going to
be a dancer. That's true in my heart. My heart dances. Okay,

(22:57):
fair enough, I wonder what that looks like. Renee sings
at the top of his lungs when no one is around.
Never Never, you know, And I'll tell you why, because
even if no one's around, I embarrassed myself, Like I'm
literally embarrassed for me. But let me ask you guys something,

(23:18):
How silly do you get when you buy yourself in
the mirror? Don't even I don't even. I actually don't
like even never no, not singing, but taking on characters
acting super silly when no one's around. I also talked
to myself. Is that normal? Am I supposed to do that?
I barely just said I love you in the mirror.
So that's why I do things that I think if

(23:39):
someone saw me doing this right now, I'd be so embarrassed.
You know a j They say it's okay to talk
to yourself, and it's even okay to answer yourself, But
if you start doing this, huh, then trouble. It's not
um okay Renee wants to be back Street Boy. No,

(24:02):
but I think I told you guys the story. We
went to um Kentucky Derby and uh, does Kevin still
have his house there? And so we stayed at his house,
you know, pre Civil War house, and I was walking
out with our luggage. It was time for us to leave,
and I was walking out with it and the driver
says to me, you're you're Kevin from the back studays,

(24:25):
and I was like, thank you. Okay, a few more um.
Renee did not like having a j live with him,
loved having a J lived with me. And he'll tell
you it's it's honestly, it will always go down in
the history books. Is the one of the best if
you exclude our families, exclude our our kids getting married

(24:49):
and all the beautiful things have come. But for two
single guys living in Malibu, best nine months of my life.
Nine months in my life was just there was literally
nothing about him living with me that I didn't like.
And I know I'm starting to sound yeah, okay. Next one,

(25:10):
Renee agreed to keep his previous marriage with Janet a secret.
It was a secret while we were married, and that
was my choice, and we you know, we don't have
to get into the psychology of it, but essentially, I
didn't think I was good enough to be with her,
and I thought that if we became public that there
would be like a Pitchfork mob saying what are you

(25:31):
doing with this guy? Right? And so? But the way
I would tell her, I would say, you know, it's
better if people think you're not married. It's better for
your career, this, this and that. So. So it was
your choice to keep it private. That's the God's on
this truth. Yeah, it was. I didn't want people to
know out of fear that people would want. Okay, Renee

(25:54):
is BOSSI when he is directing. No, No, I would
say that, I like one of eight j's in my
rules directing is we all have to have fun. Like honestly,
that's the number one rule. We have to have fun.
And we don't say what I want. We always say
what we should do. You know, it would be cool

(26:16):
if we do this, if we do that. It's never
what I what. This is what I was talking about,
what I envisioned, Da da da, It's like, honest to god.
I mean, we've now done four music videos together that
we've directed, one of them being a Bactary Boys video
and my most recent solo video that we just shot

(26:38):
was the first time that we disagreed on something and
it and then we ended up coming to this really
good compromise and it ended up working where both of
us got The end result worked for both of us.
But it was the first time that like I saw
Renee very passionately tell me in a nice way, well

(27:01):
we don't agree with you, dude, without giving too much away. Uh,
it was a wardrobe thing, and and I kept going
back to this, and he didn't feel comfortable, and but
it wasn't like it wasn't like we were never mad
at each other. I just kept saying, it would be
really cool if you if you wore it, and he'd

(27:21):
be like he basically wanted me to be shirtless, and
I didn't want to be shirtless. That's what it was.
So he just wanted to see the movie and I
didn't want to show him off. Did he did you say, well,
if you wear our tank top, then I'll be shirtless.
That's true. We still have to get him in a
tank top, and I still have to come on with
no makeup on, which would be fine, I mean, and
I'll sing, Oh, that's some major vulnerability right there. Let's

(27:45):
do one more. Renee isn't as quieter shy as he seems.
I'm not. I don't I don't think I ever claimed
to be shy. I love as as like their perception
of you. Oh I see, yeah, yeah, I know. I
wouldn't say I'm shy at all. I love talking to people.
I love meeting new people. I'm very interested in people's

(28:06):
stories to me. You know, it's kind of like, um,
I know, I know my my story, so I'll born
myself with mine. But meeting new people is to me
one of the greatest things learning whatever they have experience.
So yeah, I'm not shy or quiet. So there's there's

(28:28):
our assumptions that you guys have made about us. I'm
still like, like, I'm a little chilled from the one. Hopefully,
I'm like, wait, do we have to Can we air
all this? Yes? Hopefully we answered them honestly, and uh,
you guys enjoyed that. We're gonna take a quick break
and we'll be right back. All right, you guys, as

(29:00):
we are back and uh we as always love to
answer your emails and your questions. Um, so please keep
sending us your emails and questions and don't forget to
hit that subscribe button, and please give us five stars.
We love you guys so much and we're so grateful
for that Um, so, I love the tone you took.

(29:25):
Just that I was getting really high, a little high high, okay, Jen?
Is it? From Jenka? Jen said begging? That's what I
was thinking. He was kind of entering groveling, all right?
From Jen. I had a difficult childhood and it resulted

(29:45):
in losing my faith at a young age. What do
you say to someone who has difficulty accepting God or
a higher power and wants to get sober? Renee Austin,
that to you, bro, darn it. I was still thinking
about groveling. Um, difficult childhood and there was something losing

(30:07):
my faith. Look, the God thing is one of those
things that I didn't connect with until I was in
so much pain, and even under the guidance of my
mentor who asked me to get on my knees and
start asking for help, I didn't want to do it.
I was I was like, I've never seen God. I

(30:31):
don't know what it is. You know, just incredibly big skeptic.
And so I would say my advice is pray even
if you're afraid, and continue to pray and something magical happens.

(30:54):
And I'm not just saying that I've known this from
hundreds of people that have the same story where there's
this sort of fear of connecting with a god. For
a lot of people, it's their preconceived ideas of what
God is that keeps them from. Like I used to

(31:15):
my idea was a sort of condemning God. I was
told as a kid that God sits on the throne
and we'll punish you and send you to hell and
this and that, and today my conception of God has
nothing to do with that, you know. That's and I'll
just share with you mine. Mine has nothing. Mine doesn't

(31:35):
have two eyes, doesn't sit back and judge. Mine's just
the for me, My God is love. Is it gender based?
It's it's not gender based. Um, God for me is
just an energy that I plug into to get me
through anything. It's just an energy, you know, like gravity,

(31:57):
like anything else. But it's a loving energy. You know,
So you're not alone, and you're not you're definitely not
alone in coming and looking at sobriety but not having faith.
In fact, I would say a huge amount of us
came in the exact same way, say yeah, like it's

(32:19):
it's nice to hear that the renew that you have
it as an energy base because a lot of people
and still even I did, I mean to hear this
is comforting because like you do kind of put God
for me as an image, right, like as a higher
power man, long hair, like you have this weird you know,
perception for for me because I you know, I was
raised Catholic and like all the little kid Bibles would

(32:41):
have like God as a full on person, right, And
that's what was hard for me to believe as well,
until I was able to really put God could mean anything.
And you're ready. It's traditionally God is referred to as
a him, right him, and yes, long hair and sitting
on the throne and that zeus By that walked on sunset.

(33:07):
But that was helpful, thank you? All right here, why
don't you read this? Uh? This next? Okay, So this
is from Wendy. Four years ago. I had an accident
and that was the beginning of a cycle that I'm
still battling at the moment. Pain pills became a way
of life to me. I would wake up around seven am.
First thing I would do is pop for ten milligrams

(33:28):
of oxycodon. A couple hours later, I would pop four
more and this went on all day. And all night.
I started to listen to the podcast and I saw
myself and you guys, and I sat there and just cried.
I realized I had a problem. I was listening to
something that A J said once. He said that addicts
hide in plain sight, and I thought to myself, OMG,

(33:50):
that is me. You made me realize things I didn't
want to realize. Thank you for being honest and real.
Most of all, thank you for being you and telling
your story and being an inspiration to us. I'm so
glad you guys are winning at life. That was very nice.
I'll tell you I can relate to her story. That
was my thing. Where pills pain, pills um and yeah,

(34:11):
once you're hooked on them, it's it's no longer a choice.
You just It's like oxygen. You need it as bad
as oxygen. I've I've described to people what opioid addiction
is like. It's like you being a scuba diver and
you're a hundred feet underwater and someone rips your whatever,

(34:33):
your oxygen away from you. You'll do anything to get
it back because you're dying and you feel you know,
when you I would. One thing I want people to
know is that when you're trying to get off of opioids.
It's not just the physical withdrawals. The physical withdrawals are
like um, the fluid times ten okay, But then the

(34:56):
mental withdrawals. You become suicidal. But you don't want to
live anymore. You don't believe you deserve to breathe the
oxygen that other people are breathing. You feel that you're
a huge waste of space. That opioids pain killers, pain
killers right? Uh? They ah? They make you feel euphoric

(35:21):
when you're on them, where nothing can hurt you. Everything
is perfect. It's like like all the greatest things you've
loved as a person, your whole life are all incoming
combined into one. But then you get hooked on them,
and then you try to get off of them, and
you become suicidal. You're doubled over, you're sweating, you're throwing up,

(35:43):
you're doing all kinds of stuff, and that's and then
your brain says, if I just take one more, it
goes away. You get you go back into that Oh no,
everything's fine. Why was I freaking out? What was I
telling myself I don't deserve to live? Why was I
not wanting to live blah blah blah. That's more addicting

(36:03):
than drugs like itself, like is it more addicting than alcohol?
And I mean, I guess there's no way web weighing.
And you know, alcohol is a very addictive drug obviously,
and the withdrawals are dangerous, right, the withdraws off of
alcohol you can die from. That's why when you check

(36:23):
into rehab, if you say you've been doing cocaine, they're like, okay,
just go quite out. If you've been doing opioids, they're like, yeah, okay,
you're gonna feel like you're you're gonna you're gonna feel
like you want to die or you're gonna die, but
you're not going to. But with alcohol, you can actually
go into seizures, Grandma seizures, uh if if you're not

(36:48):
brought down medically. Right. So, and then also benzodiazepines, which
are your valium, your xen x, all those those they
take very seriously. Is well, because you could with you
can go into seizures, so you should be illegal opient.

(37:08):
So see that's the thing they serve their purpose. If
God forbid, one of us gets in a car accident
and one of our limbs gets ripped off. You're gonna
need to do morphine. You're gonna do need to do
some heavy or you're gonna you know, you'll be in
so much pain. Cancer patients are in so much pain.
They give them that so they have their place. The

(37:29):
downside is they are highly highly highly addictive. Your brain
gets used to them and then when you stop, it
just becomes nightmare. But maybe doctors should give a program
as to like how to lean off of it. Maybe
you know a good doctor h is very careful with
these things. A lot of them are in scrupulous and

(37:55):
and you know the opioid epidemic that we're in right now,
this um, this oxy code on was pushed out and
sold to the public as being non addictive. Doctors were
pushing it on their patients. Doctors were getting kicked backs
from I mean, they're in a huge lawsuit right now,

(38:17):
you know, um, the makers of OxyContin, and uh yeah,
they just want to make money, you know, so let's
just get people hooked on them and we sell more drugs.
And you know, it's just thank you for that amazing email.

(38:38):
UM hanging there, Um it gets better, um, and thank
you for the really really truly kind words. Um, it
takes it takes a lot to be that honest that
you were in that in that message and to tell
us what you're going through, um and all, I'll be

(39:01):
praying for you, so hang in there, and uh yeah
we love all right you guys. So thank you guys
as always for tuning in to our podcast pretty messed
up here on iHeart Radio. I just want to say
on behalf of all of us, I think we are
all over the moon ecstatics for our guest next week.

(39:22):
U he is literally one of the people on my
bucket list that I've wanted to literally pick his brain,
um and willingly let him pick mine. Uh so next
week we will be having deep hood. I've been telling everybody,
like I don't even know, like we have DeepArt coming randomly. Totally. Yeah,

(39:44):
people really get him, yeah, totally. Well he's definitely a giant. Yes,
you know, he won't tell you he's a giant, but
we know he's a giant. And talk about soothing voices,
I mean I could listen to them all day long, totally.
I follows lead to Deepak Actually so soothing voices renee

(40:04):
between you and him? Yes see who can And then
all of a sudden while we're doing the show, you
just hear Sheryl and I or like, I'll just interrupt
everybody as you're saying something really deep. That's just more
like what I would do. But I'm going to try
and just zip it. But if ever, I'm not saying
we should, but if ever there was a need for

(40:24):
it to our podcast, it would be with deep we will.
Maybe we should start off by doing a meditation meditation
Hell yeah, yeah, why don't we do a guided meditation
to get everyone to just you know, as a community,
as a p MU community, just don't do it while
you're driving. Pull over, pull over, and you can meditate

(40:47):
with us. Be funny if that would be funny if
he did a guided meditation with us and then we
get invoice in the mail like two weeks later, Oh
my god, go straight to Danielle and Amy kidding. All right,
you guys, you so much as always for tuning in
too Pretty Messed Up here on I Heart Radio. We
will see you guys and talk to you guys next week. Goods.

(41:11):
Follow Pretty Messed Up on I Heart Radio or subscribe
wherever you listen to podcasts.