August 24, 2022 • 27 mins
The word ‘hero’ gets tossed around alot, especially in the entertainment world…but Jonathan and Jaymes' guest today is legit one. Actress and activist Nicole Maines (a.k.a. ‘Dreamer’) is the world’s first Trans superhero on television and she joins Jonathan and Jaymes as they share real-life stories of the pressure, responsibility and pride that comes along with such roles.
Jonathan and Jaymes contemplate a major change in their relationship and how it could affect their future. Plus back-to-school horror stories!
Double the runtime on this one because you’ll probably want to listen twice.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
This is Podcast with Jonathan Bennett James v on I
Heart Radio. A new episode of podcast starts in five
four three to one. What's up, everybody, Welcome to podcast.
I'm your host, Jonathan Bennett. I am joined by my
handsome husband, the one and only, James Bennett Vaughan. I'm
(00:24):
throwing the Bennett in there because we're married now, So
Bennett Vaughan like it. Um, babe, it is back to
school season. There's so much happening. Don't try to hijack
this topic, baby, I'm the one that told you just now.
I was like, hey, I got a topic for you.
Most see if this works. First off, can be back up.
(00:45):
I want to back up to them. The Bennett Vaughan thing.
I I'm down, Like I want to change my Instagram
and everything, but I'm afraid if I do it, then
the little blue checkmark is going to go away. I mean,
I think we know enough people and Agram that we
can get you verified again, which is like a really
hard thing to do. Like so many people have problems
(01:06):
getting verified. It's like the curse of people that do
things that are influency and they used to hand them
out like they were Oriental influency. Don't use that word influence.
What wouldn't it be people that work in social media?
You know what people in the industry. Legitimate. Oh, that's
what it's supposed to be. Someone can't. I got my
(01:26):
blue checkmark because of hosting celebrity page. That's how I
had it. Um, And we're both drinking ice coffees even
though we're not together, we both are drinking our ice coffee,
staying very on brand with podcast. Um. So you want
to change your name on Instagram to James Bennett Vaughan
or just James Bennett. No, Bennett Vaughan, because that's what
(01:48):
we've been using everything for, like like our wedding to Bennett.
It's nice. I like the dog is Bradley Bennett Vaughan.
So we don't want to confuse him. We're talking back
to school, aren't we? Yeah, Babe. On the phone right
before we started proadcast, I was like, oh, I got
a host chat topic for us because everybody's going back
to school right now. Do you remember going back to school? Baby,
(02:10):
Like when you were a kid, were you excited about
it or did you dread it? Oh? My god, I
was like the biggest kiss ass to like the teacher, Like, uh,
school is where I thrived. Like elementary school, my mom
made like food for all the teachers. Once a month,
she'd do like, oh, here's a teacher's lounge, and she'd
go and bring chicken stuff shells to the teacher's lounge.
Is just like a thank you. So like I walked
(02:31):
into elementary school and it was like the trumpets were
like and it was like anything I wanted, the teachers
would just let me do because like my mom kept
them fed and happy. And so I was very excited
for bugle Boy jeans. That was like my thing. I
was like, I want bugle Boy jeans, and so I'd
go get bugle Boy jeans and a pair of white
kids because I was that much of a fagot and
(02:54):
I would just be like, yeah, I'm wearing these and
I'd roll them and it was everything. And also, um,
I was really into like the pencils. What were you into, babe? Well,
I think I think I was more like I would
dread going back to school because I was like, I'll
get made fun of a lot, and so I didn't
necessarily love the whole back to school things. Plus, like
(03:16):
we didn't really come from a family of means, so
are one thing we would get we were we were
able to get one new pair of shoes, and so
that was always my thing, Like I would get the
one new pair of shoes and hope to god the
shoes I got were the cool ones that year, and
I was gonna show up on the first day and
people were gonna love those shoes and not make fun
of those shoes. And it was always kind of a
gamble because you would think, like with the Jordan's, you
(03:37):
were safe, right whatever the new Jordans were, but if
you got the wrong color, the kids would find a
reason to make fun of you. So um, while I, UM,
while I succeeded in school, um academically, I didn't always
really love going back to school. And I think it's because,
like it's that phase of your life for like you
are not getting to be yourself, and so it's that
(03:58):
it's that pretending and and I hope I don't switch
too much when I walked down the hall. I hope
I don't list too much when I talked to this person,
and um, I just yeah, I think that's why straight
people love like the back to school reunions and all
that stuff, like ten years, twenty years out and I'm
just and a lot of us in our community are like,
I'm good to not go because that was a highlight.
(04:19):
I'm just good not to talk to those people ever again.
Like majority of them like I'm fine, but like all
my people since, like I've been out of myself, like
I want to see them all the time, because those
are the people that like got to know the authentic
real me. But I'm not surprised that was your experience
with school, little baby. It explains a lot about you. Yeah,
I loved it. I loved going back to school. There
was one year though, I got these shorts elementary school.
(04:41):
I can't remember. I wish I still had these shorts
because I would probably try to wear them now the
same size, because that's about the same size I wear
now because my shorts were so tiny these days. But
I had these shorts, these red board shorts that had
a cat on them on a skateboard and they said
scat cat, And I thought I was the coolest kid
in the entire world in the scat cat shorts. And
that was the one year I showed up. I want
(05:02):
to say it was like third grade, Mr Trump called
Dhill's class. You couldn't tell me nothing. You could not
tell me that year. Those scat Cat shorts gave me
such a power that that was the one year you
could not mess with me, The one year that I
walked in the first day of school. It was like,
you know what this is it? The scat cat is
where it's at. And that was probably actually my best
elementary school year because it started strong with the cat cat.
(05:25):
So thank you to scat Cat. If anybody knows where
I can find those shorts so I can rock him
now as a grown man, please let me know. Is
that where you got your A. O. L screen name? No,
my screen name was you know? It was he? No,
it was he boy. Oh baby, No, I don't think
that would go the same way. And now it's different,
much different context. You know, I didn't think about that
much different. Wow. Those in the third grade, Yes, do
(05:50):
you remember those pants called skids? They were called skids
pants and they were like the mc hammer pants and
like s K I d Z and like they like
the logo for them was like a yellow triangle, like
it was like a traffic sign and it was skids
and it was like a car like slipping. Well. I
got a pair of black and Neon green ones and
(06:12):
I tried to wear that to my grandma's funeral because
my mom was like, oh, you have to wear black,
And so I went and got dressed and put on
like my Neon green wind breaker that was like bright
fluorescent green and these black pants, and I should walked
up stairs and I was like, oh, is this okay?
And they're like, no, you're not wearing a Neon green windbreaker.
(06:33):
I don't recall the pants, but I just googled them
and apparently they're still popping. And skids is still a thing. Wait,
should we order skid pants and do a photo shoot?
Let's do it. Go order my now on online. Absolutely, Raymond.
What did you wear growing up? What was your like
back to school item? Guys, I went to private school.
Oh gosh, you got to wear the little Harry Potter outfit. Yeah,
(06:57):
it wasn't as it wasn't as fun, you know, no
wands and stuff like that. But yeah, so we had
to get like you had to like accessorize. I'm from
the generation where we wore the double polo, so we'd
have to wear our uniform polo and then we'd have
to like, but we were doing it, you know when,
and you would pop both collars. Yes, Yes. When I
hosted MTVS, tr L VJ for a day, I wore
(07:20):
a button down I wore a button down, long sleeve
Abercrombie shirt with an Abercrombie short sleeve polo over it,
with both collars flipped and popped, and then got to
introduce the song Cores Breathless. That's how two thousand one
I was. That's the photo we need for this episode.
That's the moment you have that what is this? What
(07:43):
you have that clip? Yeah, if you were lucky enough
to catch the Cores on tour, you would have seen
them in their tour concert blah blah blah. And if not,
here's their latest song. Check out the Cores Breathless. And
then wait, does my baby not say tour weird? By
the way to say tour tour? How many I thought
you said Cores like the beer? I am cool? That
(08:05):
was that was that? There was There was a group
called The Chords. You gotta look. I think they were
a family band, right, and they sang this song Breathless
and it was like, yeah, it was. It was every
white Girl in two thousand one. It was very that,
like if you thought Vanessa Carlton's thousand miles was it?
This was like the Sister Songs and that. Okay, yeah,
(08:26):
but no. You do say tour weird though, Babe to weird.
You say news weird. I do say news weird, which
is weird because I have to say news all the
time on TV when I'm doing news, And how how
are you supposed to say news, Raymond? News news? Now
you say it news. You gotta say it like news
like n O O S. I say news because there's
(08:48):
a news news. I don't like it. Will you say
to tour? Go on tar Listen, y'all chime in and
tell suth saying it's right? Is it it's hard news?
Or is it news? Is it any w s? Or
n O O s? And is it tour to you
(09:09):
are or whatever? My baby saying tour to tour, tour
you go on tour? Baby? Who's on the show today?
We have the one and only super talented Nicole Mains
joining us from super Girl, which technically she's my co
star since we were on Supergirl together. We're actually on
the same episode, so I'm very excited to talk to her.
(09:30):
We're going to talk to her right when we come back. Please,
welcome to the show. The one and only super talented
Nicole Mains joins us. Hello, I take you to say
(09:50):
that super talented superhero superhero Umn. Can we technically say
that we're co stars kind of because we were on
an episode together, so we can say that. I remember,
have you go cling to that one episode to say
that your co stars? Yeah? I was on super Bowl
one time. I had four lines, just get with it, okay,
(10:11):
going to all of them, and I remember didn't like
I remember us sitting in like some giant concert not
a concert hall, like a banquet hall. Yeah, it was
some Yeah, I think what were we doing? And I
was doing I was doing like patrol or something. Yes,
you were doing patrol. And there was like a big
fight about to happen of like people like no testing
(10:33):
And I was not involved in that. No, you were
not involved in that that. There was like a concert hall
or like a banquet hall where all of our actor's
chairs were set up and that's like hung out. Yes, yes,
and we took up and we took a photo together
that I cherished to this day. I captioned it karas
Hell Clinton, his hair look sexy, pushed back, you did,
and guess what, We're gonna use that photo when we
promote your episode of Pridecasts. You're welcome full I mean, hello, hello,
(10:58):
and and now you're I mean, you have done so much,
but you are a superhero for lgbt Q plus, right,
so thank you. How do you feel doing what you
do on TV and doing what you're doing in real
life with all the different amazing things that you've done.
I mean, I'm really excited about it because for a
long time I was very much in the public speaking
(11:19):
form of advocacy, so lots of you know, just getting
up in front of rooms of lots and lots and
lots of people and pouring my heart out and sharing
my trauma. Um, which is fun and fabulous and me
love doing that. UM. But it is very fun to
start exploring my advocacy in this new way of getting
to play these characters and do stupid fun stuff and
(11:46):
pretends like I can shoot energy glasses out of my hands,
and as I'm doing that, I get to be like, yes,
and this is all for trans right, and pretend like
it's not me being a five year old, right right, right, Yeah,
this is representation. Okay, this is what representation looks like. Energy.
(12:10):
I'm I'm the moment. I'm the moment exactly. I'm the
one I'm out here doing this exactly. Nicol. Speaking of representation,
They're like, I know, we all kind of have our
stories of someone saying, oh my gosh, I see myself
and you were, oh my gosh, I'm proud of myself
because of what you were doing. Do you have any
like specific stories that stick out of someone that I
(12:31):
told you they felt seen because of what you're doing.
Absolutely well. I mean so the ones that I always
stick out to me are when I go to conventions
or comic con and meet and greets and stuff. And
my problem is I'm always my handlered nightmare because my
findings always go like two hours over because I like
to stop and talk to people and I don't like
(12:52):
to be like okay, thanks nice, so so many she's
just like down to and like you already just from
hearing the story go on totally. Um, but I have these.
I'll have people come up to me and tell me, oh,
I never thought that I would ever see myself as
(13:14):
a superhero and I never thought in a million years
I would see even turns people on television the way
that they are now, and to see them in starring roles,
being heroes, being powerful and having their stories at the
same time not revolve around their transnis or their trauma. Um.
(13:37):
Well me, a story revolved around her trauma, just different trauma.
Um and and and crying and in tears. And I
remember this one when I was in the UK, this
woman came up to me sobbing, and I didn't even
know what to say to her, so I just we
just hugged for a minute. Um, because it gets to
a point where you know, there's not really you know,
(13:59):
what do you say? Because I feel the same way,
because I'm like, and this is what I always tell people,
I'm like, this is my first turn superhero too. I
never thought that I was going to see it, and
now I have the added mind. I don't know if
we can swear on this, I'd be added my mind
being that superhero and then having when we were filming,
having you know, months and months and months trying to
(14:21):
sit on these secrets. Uh, like you won't get to
celebrate this together. I'm just like in my apartment going yeah,
now it is. It's such a cool time in history
that like if we realized like we're the ones that
are doing it, like we're the history books right now,
which is kind of really cool when you think of
like the first that you get to do, like some
of the first like Jonathan and I have gotten to do,
(14:42):
especially like the wedding space for the same sex couples
are like things like Jonathan's gotten to do on homework
and other places and the things that you're doing in
the superhero world. It's really cool that it's happening, and
it's awesome that it's happening, but it's it is. It
is that mind of oh my gosh, it's happening, but
we're the ones doing it, and so's I hope I
don't mess this up. I hope that I get this
(15:04):
right because it's on me right now to that one, well,
it's well exactly and and and that's why I think
I'm so excited to see more and more of this
coming out. D C just released the new graphic novel
um Galaxy, The Prettiest Star, which is another trans alien superhero,
and we're seeing more and more of these types of
characters pop up in Hallmark spaces, in comic books, in
(15:27):
you know, just TV dramas, in late night comedies. We're
seeing trans people occupy all of these and not even
just trans people, just queer people in general occupied these
spaces that we haven't before. And I think that alleviates
the pressure on all of us to be the one
because I remember, like, as we're as we were doing
(15:49):
me as stories and as we were writing her, it
was always that conscious thing in our minds, oh, hang on,
how is this going to reflect on the community at large?
And I think the more that have these characters, the
less pressure it is on those individual characters and on
those individual actors to represent every single person who looks
(16:10):
like them or identifies the way they do. And so
if this character makes a bad decision or does something
less than ideal or moral, it does not negatively reflect
on all trans people or all queer people. Right. And also,
there's gotta be I totally identify with you because just
doing the did doing the Christmas House one Christmas House too,
(16:33):
for Hallmark, having the first gay kiss, having the first
gay relationship, and you know movies that were in the
middle of shooting now that are going to also make history.
On Hallmark Channel, there's you know, just the other dand set.
I'm like standing there and I'm like I watched the
playback and I'm like is that right? And I second
guess it and I'm like, uh, And you really get
in your head because I don't know about you, but
(16:54):
I feel the weight of the gay community on my
shoulders when I'm shooting these and it's a heavy weight
and all you to be the lead of a movie
and film it is a lot of pressure. But then
to be like, oh, I'm doing this for a lot
more than me, Like this is for a lot of
people watching this, and you get nervous about like making
the right choice or not making the right choice and
what what I think. We get so caught up when
(17:17):
in this in society these days, is everyone's so quick
to to jump down your throat if there's something that
they don't find to be ideal or perfect for the community,
and you have to stop and realize, like, hey, we're
not going to get everything perfect every single time. But
the fact is we're the ones doing it, so shut
(17:38):
up because we're actually doing the work and actually telling
the stories, which is better than not telling the stories.
And it's like we can You're you're only gonna You're
only as good as you only know what you know
in that moment. And when you're in a moment shooting
a scene and doing it, you it's like there's so
many elements and you can only control so much. But
the fact is these stories are being told and that's
(17:59):
what that's what matters. Yeah, well, and that's the thing
also just being storytellers, and when you're in that creative space,
you're not it's hard to split your focus between Okay,
I I'm trying to represent this entire community, and I'm
trying to uh meet a very high standard and a
very high bar in the bar and the and the
(18:20):
stakes are very high. But also I'm telling a story
and I have to tell an authentic story and a
good story. And people don't always make the right decisions
all the time. I remember, um, one of the things
that jumped out to me in season four when Brainiac
and Nia first kissed it was and it was kind
of like that common like trope of like one person's
(18:42):
like talking too much and rambling and spiraling and the
other ones like shut up and kiss me. So Nia
just shuts him up with a kiss Paul. I thought
it was romantic and beautiful, but people online really didn't
like it because they were like, she didn't get consent,
she did not ask him to kiss. She didn't was like,
and I started spiraling, and I was like, oh my god,
(19:02):
what have I done? Oh my god, it's the first
trans superhero. She's a sexual predator. Oh Marjorie Taylor Green,
You's gonna love this. Like I was like, oh god,
damn it. But then I was like I had to
stop and think. I was like, Okay, she is not
the first person to have ever done this, and we
both knew in the moment how the characters were feeling
(19:26):
what that meant for both of them, and we knew
it was that wasn't like that. So I had to
try myself away from the oh god, how is this
reflecting on all trans people and just focus on like
for their story it made sense. And also I was like,
screw you, guys. I was really cute. It was a
really cute moment, and I started flickering over us like
(19:47):
it was a moment. It would just spark you guys, Nicole.
That's how I shut Jonathan up all the time in
real life. So it is a totally real thing. It's
it's what happens. And you gotta remember, like people are
going to find a reason to hate on you hartist,
and I have to always tell myself this. I have
to always reminded Jonathan of this. Like you can go
in a pet store can be on fire, and you
go in and you save every single animal out of
(20:09):
that pet store. There will be somebody that comes for
you online, well why didn't you put out the fire?
There's are you can never do everything right for every reason. Yeah,
they just there's people that you have to remember. They're
coming from a place something's hurting in them that's making
them lash out in that way. And so you can
only but I know it's hard because the negative stuff
(20:29):
stays with you much more than the positive stuff. But
you have to remember, like, oh, I feel bad for
this person because they're at a place right now that
something's hurting that they're trying to take it out on me.
Can I just say this, Um, I know that like
you did this, and like all the trans girls are
feeling represented. But as the little queen that I was
when I was a kid that had my little silver Hawks,
you're probably not even don't have to know what that
(20:50):
was pajamas that had wings and would twirl and swirl
around the living room. When I saw you shooting laser beams,
I also felt seen. I felt seen because that is
a whole community l G B t Q plus And
I was like, you know what, Yeah, if I had
had you when I was five, I would have done
a couple extra twirls in that living room. Okay, thank
you very much. Yes, I felt like I had my
(21:12):
I have a pair of gloves and they have little
lights on them, and I'm so upset because they have
like a strobe setting that we never use, but I
used it all the time when we weren't filming. You
would be in the chair. I turned my little strobes
on and I'm like braving by myself. Oh my gosh, Nicole,
(21:33):
You're amazing. Thank you so much for all that you've
done for our community. Really, it means the absolute world
to us. Don't don't take anything except pride and happiness
of what you've done, because like you've seriously kicked down
literally kicked down doors for other people. Before we go,
I want to ask you one thing. This is pridecast
What does pride mean to you. I mean, pride means
(21:57):
a lot of different things. I think you know you
preface that was saying pride as a protest, pride as
a riot. But I think it's also important to recognize,
especially right now, we're in a time where we are
seeing just unprecedented attacks on our community, and I think
it's important to take pride as an opportunity to step
back and celebrate our victories, celebrate ourselves. Celebrate the fact
(22:22):
that we have these characters on television on all of
the channels that we can see ourselves in um that
we can just channel surf in our living rooms and
go gay, gay, trans gay five gay like and have
that and celebrate just being a part of this awesome community.
Celebrate our culture, celebrate the spinning in the living room
(22:46):
with the lasers and the lights in the end, everything like,
just to take pride in ourselves. Oh, I love it.
I absolutely love it. You're wonderful. You are wonderful, Nicle.
Thank you so much for coming on and telling your story,
and thank you for having me. I'm coming to play
with them gloves girl, ye, come with them gloves. Come over.
(23:09):
Listen you I'm deceased and on that. Give it up
for tapping your cars, for clapping your cars. Clapper. If
you're listening, thank you, thank you, thank you. Alright, the
(23:38):
time has come. Each week we like to look back
on our gay history so we always remember where we
came from. And this week, James, we have something really
exciting that happened in gay history. What is it all right?
This week in gay history. Let's take it to the
New York Times article. It was a front page story
in nineteen seventy. It was called Homosexuals and Revolts. This
(24:03):
is a quote here. The article says, a new mood
now taking hold amongst the nation's homosexuals in growing numbers.
They are publicly identifying themselves as homosexuals, taking a measure
of pride in that identity, and seeking militantly to end
what they see as society's persecution of them. So we're
(24:24):
talking about just a year after Stone Wall. So this
is the very beginning still of the movement. And you
got to think about nineteen seventy, Baby, that is not
that long ago that there are many people listening right
now that we're alive when this happened. So those that
were at the forefront of this, they are still here
and we are so appreciative of them. They have been
the force behind the movement to give us rights, to
(24:47):
give us pride, to give us the ability to be
ourselves and live our lives to the fullest. So thank
you to every single person that came before us that
has fought and poke out and been a homosexual in revolt.
We appreciate. How do you say that word homosexual? You
say it weird? Homosexual? You say homo? How do you
(25:11):
I think you say it weird? We don't really use
that word anyway, but homosexual, homosexual. I'm from Virginia, baby,
some words homo. I always said homosexual. It's homosexual. I
guess the more you learn. All right, that's gay history,
whatever it is. I'm proud to be one. All right.
We gotta get into my gay Spotlight, baby HiT's. Oh
(25:33):
my gosh, it's time for the gay Spotlight. Oh my
favorite part of the show. Each week we shine our
big Gay Spotlight on someone in the lgbt Q plus
community that is doing extraordinary things. This week's big Gay
Spotlight from James Vaughan goes to who baby you know? Baby?
You know? Homo shot My Big Gay spotlight on this week.
West and Alex. Yes, I'm talking about West Santos and
(25:55):
Alex Gomez. They are the photographer team duo that actually
shot all the promo shot for Pridecast. But what I
think it's also really cool is West did some really
cool stuff at Christmas Con that you were just at. Baby. Yes,
he did like a Disney Christmas display and it was
the most gay, beautiful Christmas Disney experience that you could
(26:21):
ever see, and it was just so lovely and it
made so many people happy. He wrote so much joy
and it's just like the little things like that, like
the gays out there in the world that are just
doing the little things as well as the big things
to bring smiles to people's faces and make it a
happier place. Well, and you also made that big giant
switch that y'all had when you like switched on the lights,
and like, he makes a lot of cool stuff. So
(26:42):
not just a talented photographer, but just a talented person
that's putting a lot of smiles on people's faces. And also,
I mean shot the amazing photos that we have for
our podcast, but shoots a lot of amazing celebrities, So
give them a follow on Instagram. It's at West and Alex.
You can see how the stars they shoot and then
a His other instagram is Flipping free right, Flipping free yeah,
(27:03):
and you can see all the cool stuff he like.
He like flips things and gives him like a second
chance in life. So what about this face? Can he
flip this? I don't know if we can do all that, baby,
just you know, just showing the spotlight on the gaze
that are just bringing light to everybody this week.
This is Podcast with Jonathan Bennett James v on I
Heart Radio. A new episode of podcast starts in five
four three to one. What's up, everybody, Welcome to podcast.
I'm your host, Jonathan Bennett. I am joined by my
handsome husband, the one and only, James Bennett Vaughan. I'm
(00:24):
throwing the Bennett in there because we're married now, So
Bennett Vaughan like it. Um, babe, it is back to
school season. There's so much happening. Don't try to hijack
this topic, baby, I'm the one that told you just now.
I was like, hey, I got a topic for you.
Most see if this works. First off, can be back up.
(00:45):
I want to back up to them. The Bennett Vaughan thing.
I I'm down, Like I want to change my Instagram
and everything, but I'm afraid if I do it, then
the little blue checkmark is going to go away. I mean,
I think we know enough people and Agram that we
can get you verified again, which is like a really
hard thing to do. Like so many people have problems
(01:06):
getting verified. It's like the curse of people that do
things that are influency and they used to hand them
out like they were Oriental influency. Don't use that word influence.
What wouldn't it be people that work in social media?
You know what people in the industry. Legitimate. Oh, that's
what it's supposed to be. Someone can't. I got my
(01:26):
blue checkmark because of hosting celebrity page. That's how I
had it. Um, And we're both drinking ice coffees even
though we're not together, we both are drinking our ice coffee,
staying very on brand with podcast. Um. So you want
to change your name on Instagram to James Bennett Vaughan
or just James Bennett. No, Bennett Vaughan, because that's what
(01:48):
we've been using everything for, like like our wedding to Bennett.
It's nice. I like the dog is Bradley Bennett Vaughan.
So we don't want to confuse him. We're talking back
to school, aren't we? Yeah, Babe. On the phone right
before we started proadcast, I was like, oh, I got
a host chat topic for us because everybody's going back
to school right now. Do you remember going back to school? Baby,
(02:10):
Like when you were a kid, were you excited about
it or did you dread it? Oh? My god, I
was like the biggest kiss ass to like the teacher, Like, uh,
school is where I thrived. Like elementary school, my mom
made like food for all the teachers. Once a month,
she'd do like, oh, here's a teacher's lounge, and she'd
go and bring chicken stuff shells to the teacher's lounge.
Is just like a thank you. So like I walked
(02:31):
into elementary school and it was like the trumpets were
like and it was like anything I wanted, the teachers
would just let me do because like my mom kept
them fed and happy. And so I was very excited
for bugle Boy jeans. That was like my thing. I
was like, I want bugle Boy jeans, and so I'd
go get bugle Boy jeans and a pair of white
kids because I was that much of a fagot and
(02:54):
I would just be like, yeah, I'm wearing these and
I'd roll them and it was everything. And also, um,
I was really into like the pencils. What were you into, babe? Well,
I think I think I was more like I would
dread going back to school because I was like, I'll
get made fun of a lot, and so I didn't
necessarily love the whole back to school things. Plus, like
(03:16):
we didn't really come from a family of means, so
are one thing we would get we were we were
able to get one new pair of shoes, and so
that was always my thing, Like I would get the
one new pair of shoes and hope to god the
shoes I got were the cool ones that year, and
I was gonna show up on the first day and
people were gonna love those shoes and not make fun
of those shoes. And it was always kind of a
gamble because you would think, like with the Jordan's, you
(03:37):
were safe, right whatever the new Jordans were, but if
you got the wrong color, the kids would find a
reason to make fun of you. So um, while I, UM,
while I succeeded in school, um academically, I didn't always
really love going back to school. And I think it's because,
like it's that phase of your life for like you
are not getting to be yourself, and so it's that
(03:58):
it's that pretending and and I hope I don't switch
too much when I walked down the hall. I hope
I don't list too much when I talked to this person,
and um, I just yeah, I think that's why straight
people love like the back to school reunions and all
that stuff, like ten years, twenty years out and I'm
just and a lot of us in our community are like,
I'm good to not go because that was a highlight.
(04:19):
I'm just good not to talk to those people ever again.
Like majority of them like I'm fine, but like all
my people since, like I've been out of myself, like
I want to see them all the time, because those
are the people that like got to know the authentic
real me. But I'm not surprised that was your experience
with school, little baby. It explains a lot about you. Yeah,
I loved it. I loved going back to school. There
was one year though, I got these shorts elementary school.
(04:41):
I can't remember. I wish I still had these shorts
because I would probably try to wear them now the
same size, because that's about the same size I wear
now because my shorts were so tiny these days. But
I had these shorts, these red board shorts that had
a cat on them on a skateboard and they said
scat cat, And I thought I was the coolest kid
in the entire world in the scat cat shorts. And
that was the one year I showed up. I want
(05:02):
to say it was like third grade, Mr Trump called
Dhill's class. You couldn't tell me nothing. You could not
tell me that year. Those scat Cat shorts gave me
such a power that that was the one year you
could not mess with me, The one year that I
walked in the first day of school. It was like,
you know what this is it? The scat cat is
where it's at. And that was probably actually my best
elementary school year because it started strong with the cat cat.
(05:25):
So thank you to scat Cat. If anybody knows where
I can find those shorts so I can rock him
now as a grown man, please let me know. Is
that where you got your A. O. L screen name? No,
my screen name was you know? It was he? No,
it was he boy. Oh baby, No, I don't think
that would go the same way. And now it's different,
much different context. You know, I didn't think about that
much different. Wow. Those in the third grade, Yes, do
(05:50):
you remember those pants called skids? They were called skids
pants and they were like the mc hammer pants and
like s K I d Z and like they like
the logo for them was like a yellow triangle, like
it was like a traffic sign and it was skids
and it was like a car like slipping. Well. I
got a pair of black and Neon green ones and
(06:12):
I tried to wear that to my grandma's funeral because
my mom was like, oh, you have to wear black,
And so I went and got dressed and put on
like my Neon green wind breaker that was like bright
fluorescent green and these black pants, and I should walked
up stairs and I was like, oh, is this okay?
And they're like, no, you're not wearing a Neon green windbreaker.
(06:33):
I don't recall the pants, but I just googled them
and apparently they're still popping. And skids is still a thing. Wait,
should we order skid pants and do a photo shoot?
Let's do it. Go order my now on online. Absolutely, Raymond.
What did you wear growing up? What was your like
back to school item? Guys, I went to private school.
Oh gosh, you got to wear the little Harry Potter outfit. Yeah,
(06:57):
it wasn't as it wasn't as fun, you know, no
wands and stuff like that. But yeah, so we had
to get like you had to like accessorize. I'm from
the generation where we wore the double polo, so we'd
have to wear our uniform polo and then we'd have
to like, but we were doing it, you know when,
and you would pop both collars. Yes, Yes. When I
hosted MTVS, tr L VJ for a day, I wore
(07:20):
a button down I wore a button down, long sleeve
Abercrombie shirt with an Abercrombie short sleeve polo over it,
with both collars flipped and popped, and then got to
introduce the song Cores Breathless. That's how two thousand one
I was. That's the photo we need for this episode.
That's the moment you have that what is this? What
(07:43):
you have that clip? Yeah, if you were lucky enough
to catch the Cores on tour, you would have seen
them in their tour concert blah blah blah. And if not,
here's their latest song. Check out the Cores Breathless. And
then wait, does my baby not say tour weird? By
the way to say tour tour? How many I thought
you said Cores like the beer? I am cool? That
(08:05):
was that was that? There was There was a group
called The Chords. You gotta look. I think they were
a family band, right, and they sang this song Breathless
and it was like, yeah, it was. It was every
white Girl in two thousand one. It was very that,
like if you thought Vanessa Carlton's thousand miles was it?
This was like the Sister Songs and that. Okay, yeah,
(08:26):
but no. You do say tour weird though, Babe to weird.
You say news weird. I do say news weird, which
is weird because I have to say news all the
time on TV when I'm doing news, And how how
are you supposed to say news, Raymond? News news? Now
you say it news. You gotta say it like news
like n O O S. I say news because there's
(08:48):
a news news. I don't like it. Will you say
to tour? Go on tar Listen, y'all chime in and
tell suth saying it's right? Is it it's hard news?
Or is it news? Is it any w s? Or
n O O s? And is it tour to you
(09:09):
are or whatever? My baby saying tour to tour, tour
you go on tour? Baby? Who's on the show today?
We have the one and only super talented Nicole Mains
joining us from super Girl, which technically she's my co
star since we were on Supergirl together. We're actually on
the same episode, so I'm very excited to talk to her.
(09:30):
We're going to talk to her right when we come back. Please,
welcome to the show. The one and only super talented
Nicole Mains joins us. Hello, I take you to say
(09:50):
that super talented superhero superhero Umn. Can we technically say
that we're co stars kind of because we were on
an episode together, so we can say that. I remember,
have you go cling to that one episode to say
that your co stars? Yeah? I was on super Bowl
one time. I had four lines, just get with it, okay,
(10:11):
going to all of them, and I remember didn't like
I remember us sitting in like some giant concert not
a concert hall, like a banquet hall. Yeah, it was
some Yeah, I think what were we doing? And I
was doing I was doing like patrol or something. Yes,
you were doing patrol. And there was like a big
fight about to happen of like people like no testing
(10:33):
And I was not involved in that. No, you were
not involved in that that. There was like a concert hall
or like a banquet hall where all of our actor's
chairs were set up and that's like hung out. Yes, yes,
and we took up and we took a photo together
that I cherished to this day. I captioned it karas
Hell Clinton, his hair look sexy, pushed back, you did,
and guess what, We're gonna use that photo when we
promote your episode of Pridecasts. You're welcome full I mean, hello, hello,
(10:58):
and and now you're I mean, you have done so much,
but you are a superhero for lgbt Q plus, right,
so thank you. How do you feel doing what you
do on TV and doing what you're doing in real
life with all the different amazing things that you've done.
I mean, I'm really excited about it because for a
long time I was very much in the public speaking
(11:19):
form of advocacy, so lots of you know, just getting
up in front of rooms of lots and lots and
lots of people and pouring my heart out and sharing
my trauma. Um, which is fun and fabulous and me
love doing that. UM. But it is very fun to
start exploring my advocacy in this new way of getting
to play these characters and do stupid fun stuff and
(11:46):
pretends like I can shoot energy glasses out of my hands,
and as I'm doing that, I get to be like, yes,
and this is all for trans right, and pretend like
it's not me being a five year old, right right, right, Yeah,
this is representation. Okay, this is what representation looks like. Energy.
(12:10):
I'm I'm the moment. I'm the moment exactly. I'm the
one I'm out here doing this exactly. Nicol. Speaking of representation,
They're like, I know, we all kind of have our
stories of someone saying, oh my gosh, I see myself
and you were, oh my gosh, I'm proud of myself
because of what you were doing. Do you have any
like specific stories that stick out of someone that I
(12:31):
told you they felt seen because of what you're doing.
Absolutely well. I mean so the ones that I always
stick out to me are when I go to conventions
or comic con and meet and greets and stuff. And
my problem is I'm always my handlered nightmare because my
findings always go like two hours over because I like
to stop and talk to people and I don't like
(12:52):
to be like okay, thanks nice, so so many she's
just like down to and like you already just from
hearing the story go on totally. Um, but I have these.
I'll have people come up to me and tell me, oh,
I never thought that I would ever see myself as
(13:14):
a superhero and I never thought in a million years
I would see even turns people on television the way
that they are now, and to see them in starring roles,
being heroes, being powerful and having their stories at the
same time not revolve around their transnis or their trauma. Um.
(13:37):
Well me, a story revolved around her trauma, just different trauma.
Um and and and crying and in tears. And I
remember this one when I was in the UK, this
woman came up to me sobbing, and I didn't even
know what to say to her, so I just we
just hugged for a minute. Um, because it gets to
a point where you know, there's not really you know,
(13:59):
what do you say? Because I feel the same way,
because I'm like, and this is what I always tell people,
I'm like, this is my first turn superhero too. I
never thought that I was going to see it, and
now I have the added mind. I don't know if
we can swear on this, I'd be added my mind
being that superhero and then having when we were filming,
having you know, months and months and months trying to
(14:21):
sit on these secrets. Uh, like you won't get to
celebrate this together. I'm just like in my apartment going yeah,
now it is. It's such a cool time in history
that like if we realized like we're the ones that
are doing it, like we're the history books right now,
which is kind of really cool when you think of
like the first that you get to do, like some
of the first like Jonathan and I have gotten to do,
(14:42):
especially like the wedding space for the same sex couples
are like things like Jonathan's gotten to do on homework
and other places and the things that you're doing in
the superhero world. It's really cool that it's happening, and
it's awesome that it's happening, but it's it is. It
is that mind of oh my gosh, it's happening, but
we're the ones doing it, and so's I hope I
don't mess this up. I hope that I get this
(15:04):
right because it's on me right now to that one, well,
it's well exactly and and and that's why I think
I'm so excited to see more and more of this
coming out. D C just released the new graphic novel
um Galaxy, The Prettiest Star, which is another trans alien superhero,
and we're seeing more and more of these types of
characters pop up in Hallmark spaces, in comic books, in
(15:27):
you know, just TV dramas, in late night comedies. We're
seeing trans people occupy all of these and not even
just trans people, just queer people in general occupied these
spaces that we haven't before. And I think that alleviates
the pressure on all of us to be the one
because I remember, like, as we're as we were doing
(15:49):
me as stories and as we were writing her, it
was always that conscious thing in our minds, oh, hang on,
how is this going to reflect on the community at large?
And I think the more that have these characters, the
less pressure it is on those individual characters and on
those individual actors to represent every single person who looks
(16:10):
like them or identifies the way they do. And so
if this character makes a bad decision or does something
less than ideal or moral, it does not negatively reflect
on all trans people or all queer people. Right. And also,
there's gotta be I totally identify with you because just
doing the did doing the Christmas House one Christmas House too,
(16:33):
for Hallmark, having the first gay kiss, having the first
gay relationship, and you know movies that were in the
middle of shooting now that are going to also make history.
On Hallmark Channel, there's you know, just the other dand set.
I'm like standing there and I'm like I watched the
playback and I'm like is that right? And I second
guess it and I'm like, uh, And you really get
in your head because I don't know about you, but
(16:54):
I feel the weight of the gay community on my
shoulders when I'm shooting these and it's a heavy weight
and all you to be the lead of a movie
and film it is a lot of pressure. But then
to be like, oh, I'm doing this for a lot
more than me, Like this is for a lot of
people watching this, and you get nervous about like making
the right choice or not making the right choice and
what what I think. We get so caught up when
(17:17):
in this in society these days, is everyone's so quick
to to jump down your throat if there's something that
they don't find to be ideal or perfect for the community,
and you have to stop and realize, like, hey, we're
not going to get everything perfect every single time. But
the fact is we're the ones doing it, so shut
(17:38):
up because we're actually doing the work and actually telling
the stories, which is better than not telling the stories.
And it's like we can You're you're only gonna You're
only as good as you only know what you know
in that moment. And when you're in a moment shooting
a scene and doing it, you it's like there's so
many elements and you can only control so much. But
the fact is these stories are being told and that's
(17:59):
what that's what matters. Yeah, well, and that's the thing
also just being storytellers, and when you're in that creative space,
you're not it's hard to split your focus between Okay,
I I'm trying to represent this entire community, and I'm
trying to uh meet a very high standard and a
very high bar in the bar and the and the
(18:20):
stakes are very high. But also I'm telling a story
and I have to tell an authentic story and a
good story. And people don't always make the right decisions
all the time. I remember, um, one of the things
that jumped out to me in season four when Brainiac
and Nia first kissed it was and it was kind
of like that common like trope of like one person's
(18:42):
like talking too much and rambling and spiraling and the
other ones like shut up and kiss me. So Nia
just shuts him up with a kiss Paul. I thought
it was romantic and beautiful, but people online really didn't
like it because they were like, she didn't get consent,
she did not ask him to kiss. She didn't was like,
and I started spiraling, and I was like, oh my god,
(19:02):
what have I done? Oh my god, it's the first
trans superhero. She's a sexual predator. Oh Marjorie Taylor Green,
You's gonna love this. Like I was like, oh god,
damn it. But then I was like I had to
stop and think. I was like, Okay, she is not
the first person to have ever done this, and we
both knew in the moment how the characters were feeling
(19:26):
what that meant for both of them, and we knew
it was that wasn't like that. So I had to
try myself away from the oh god, how is this
reflecting on all trans people and just focus on like
for their story it made sense. And also I was like,
screw you, guys. I was really cute. It was a
really cute moment, and I started flickering over us like
(19:47):
it was a moment. It would just spark you guys, Nicole.
That's how I shut Jonathan up all the time in
real life. So it is a totally real thing. It's
it's what happens. And you gotta remember, like people are
going to find a reason to hate on you hartist,
and I have to always tell myself this. I have
to always reminded Jonathan of this. Like you can go
in a pet store can be on fire, and you
go in and you save every single animal out of
(20:09):
that pet store. There will be somebody that comes for
you online, well why didn't you put out the fire?
There's are you can never do everything right for every reason. Yeah,
they just there's people that you have to remember. They're
coming from a place something's hurting in them that's making
them lash out in that way. And so you can
only but I know it's hard because the negative stuff
(20:29):
stays with you much more than the positive stuff. But
you have to remember, like, oh, I feel bad for
this person because they're at a place right now that
something's hurting that they're trying to take it out on me.
Can I just say this, Um, I know that like
you did this, and like all the trans girls are
feeling represented. But as the little queen that I was
when I was a kid that had my little silver Hawks,
you're probably not even don't have to know what that
(20:50):
was pajamas that had wings and would twirl and swirl
around the living room. When I saw you shooting laser beams,
I also felt seen. I felt seen because that is
a whole community l G B t Q plus And
I was like, you know what, Yeah, if I had
had you when I was five, I would have done
a couple extra twirls in that living room. Okay, thank
you very much. Yes, I felt like I had my
(21:12):
I have a pair of gloves and they have little
lights on them, and I'm so upset because they have
like a strobe setting that we never use, but I
used it all the time when we weren't filming. You
would be in the chair. I turned my little strobes
on and I'm like braving by myself. Oh my gosh, Nicole,
(21:33):
You're amazing. Thank you so much for all that you've
done for our community. Really, it means the absolute world
to us. Don't don't take anything except pride and happiness
of what you've done, because like you've seriously kicked down
literally kicked down doors for other people. Before we go,
I want to ask you one thing. This is pridecast
What does pride mean to you. I mean, pride means
(21:57):
a lot of different things. I think you know you
preface that was saying pride as a protest, pride as
a riot. But I think it's also important to recognize,
especially right now, we're in a time where we are
seeing just unprecedented attacks on our community, and I think
it's important to take pride as an opportunity to step
back and celebrate our victories, celebrate ourselves. Celebrate the fact
(22:22):
that we have these characters on television on all of
the channels that we can see ourselves in um that
we can just channel surf in our living rooms and
go gay, gay, trans gay five gay like and have
that and celebrate just being a part of this awesome community.
Celebrate our culture, celebrate the spinning in the living room
(22:46):
with the lasers and the lights in the end, everything like,
just to take pride in ourselves. Oh, I love it.
I absolutely love it. You're wonderful. You are wonderful, Nicle.
Thank you so much for coming on and telling your story,
and thank you for having me. I'm coming to play
with them gloves girl, ye, come with them gloves. Come over.
(23:09):
Listen you I'm deceased and on that. Give it up
for tapping your cars, for clapping your cars. Clapper. If
you're listening, thank you, thank you, thank you. Alright, the
(23:38):
time has come. Each week we like to look back
on our gay history so we always remember where we
came from. And this week, James, we have something really
exciting that happened in gay history. What is it all right?
This week in gay history. Let's take it to the
New York Times article. It was a front page story
in nineteen seventy. It was called Homosexuals and Revolts. This
(24:03):
is a quote here. The article says, a new mood
now taking hold amongst the nation's homosexuals in growing numbers.
They are publicly identifying themselves as homosexuals, taking a measure
of pride in that identity, and seeking militantly to end
what they see as society's persecution of them. So we're
(24:24):
talking about just a year after Stone Wall. So this
is the very beginning still of the movement. And you
got to think about nineteen seventy, Baby, that is not
that long ago that there are many people listening right
now that we're alive when this happened. So those that
were at the forefront of this, they are still here
and we are so appreciative of them. They have been
the force behind the movement to give us rights, to
(24:47):
give us pride, to give us the ability to be
ourselves and live our lives to the fullest. So thank
you to every single person that came before us that
has fought and poke out and been a homosexual in revolt.
We appreciate. How do you say that word homosexual? You
say it weird? Homosexual? You say homo? How do you
(25:11):
I think you say it weird? We don't really use
that word anyway, but homosexual, homosexual. I'm from Virginia, baby,
some words homo. I always said homosexual. It's homosexual. I
guess the more you learn. All right, that's gay history,
whatever it is. I'm proud to be one. All right.
We gotta get into my gay Spotlight, baby HiT's. Oh
(25:33):
my gosh, it's time for the gay Spotlight. Oh my
favorite part of the show. Each week we shine our
big Gay Spotlight on someone in the lgbt Q plus
community that is doing extraordinary things. This week's big Gay
Spotlight from James Vaughan goes to who baby you know? Baby?
You know? Homo shot My Big Gay spotlight on this week.
West and Alex. Yes, I'm talking about West Santos and
(25:55):
Alex Gomez. They are the photographer team duo that actually
shot all the promo shot for Pridecast. But what I
think it's also really cool is West did some really
cool stuff at Christmas Con that you were just at. Baby. Yes,
he did like a Disney Christmas display and it was
the most gay, beautiful Christmas Disney experience that you could
(26:21):
ever see, and it was just so lovely and it
made so many people happy. He wrote so much joy
and it's just like the little things like that, like
the gays out there in the world that are just
doing the little things as well as the big things
to bring smiles to people's faces and make it a
happier place. Well, and you also made that big giant
switch that y'all had when you like switched on the lights,
and like, he makes a lot of cool stuff. So
(26:42):
not just a talented photographer, but just a talented person
that's putting a lot of smiles on people's faces. And also,
I mean shot the amazing photos that we have for
our podcast, but shoots a lot of amazing celebrities, So
give them a follow on Instagram. It's at West and Alex.
You can see how the stars they shoot and then
a His other instagram is Flipping free right, Flipping free yeah,
(27:03):
and you can see all the cool stuff he like.
He like flips things and gives him like a second
chance in life. So what about this face? Can he
flip this? I don't know if we can do all that, baby,
just you know, just showing the spotlight on the gaze
that are just bringing light to everybody this week.
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Dateline NBC
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