October 28, 2025 • 56 mins
Calling all Bachelor Nation fans, podcast lovers, and reality TV junkies… NICK VIALL IS HERE! Carlos sits down with Nick Viall to talk all things unscripted television - from being labeled the villain to life after reality TV, family, and more. Plus, find out how Nick saved Carlos, earning him a permanent spot on our “nice guy” list. You won’t want to miss this one!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Reality with the King is hosted by me, Carlos King.
I'm an executive producer who have produced some of your
favorite shows from the Real Housewives in Atlanta, New Jersey
and my own creation, The Love and Marriage Franchise and
Bell Collective. Every episode we recap reality television from the
Real Housewives Franchise to The Bachelor or Selling Sunset, in
(00:27):
addition to celebrity guests, whether in the unscripted space or
scripted as well. Hey, rain drops on today's episode of
Reality with the King.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
I am in the presence of greatness. Ladies, gentlemen, gays
and days.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Give it up for the podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
King the reality icon, the host who does the most
nickle intro. Listen, I'm so happy to talk to you.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
I'm happy, I'm happy to be with you. Thanks for
thanks for having.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Me so a little behind the scenes t So, I'm
gonna tell you all how much of a great guy
Nick is, because I know people think, oh my god,
he's this or that. Listen. In real life, I had
a studio book.
Speaker 3 (01:10):
From my guy. An hour ago, no one showed up.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
His publicist and Nick were like, let's just pivot and
come to our studio.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
And Nick was like, do you need a ride? I'm like,
I can catch an uber or left or the train.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
He's like, come ride with me, dude. So listen all
of that talk about what this guy does or doesn't do.
I'm here to tell you he is the nicest and
thank you so much for pivoting the way you did.
I don't understand Nick, why people think you're a bad guy.
Speaker 3 (01:42):
Get that. You know, I have opinions, you know, and
I'm white, I'm straight, so well you know. But yeah,
I mean listen, I think, as you know, you know,
just like I think the reality TV space is, you
(02:05):
have to embrace the discourse. You know. I'm always like
reminding my team it is not our jobs to be liked.
It is our job to like give things people to
care about. You know. We want people to be engaged
in what we're doing. We want them to certainly enjoy
being liked, and we want people to agree with us
(02:28):
at times, but it's more important that they care. It's
not interesting to just say the popular thing. We're also
not trying to say things just to be divisive either,
you know, We're not. You know, there's I'm a huge
sports fan and I find it irritating. There's like a
gentleman named Skip Bayliss. For those of you who follow
(02:50):
sports you would know. But like there's certain people in
sports who are just they say things knowing it's going
to get people riled up, like knowing it's going to
be they don't even believe in what they're saying. And
that's certainly something that we we we don't do that,
but we are willing to, like, you know, have an
opinion and allow people disagree with it. And I think,
(03:12):
you know, and and and like in Reality TV, you know,
it's just like I always kind of equate it to
sports because we cover Reality V like sports, where like
I love I love rooting against the Minnesota Vikings as
much as I enjoy rooting for my Green Bay Packers,
you know. So it's like it's it's fun to like
(03:32):
hate on things, as we know as humans, we do
that all the time. And sports is like an outlet
for people to like have a you know, hopefully a
healthy amount of hate. And I think Reality TV for
its fans offer that same outlet where like we're not
just rooting for for Meredith Marx, you know, sometimes we're
rooting against Brittany Bateman. Now I'm a Britney Bateman, Stan,
(03:57):
but you know what I'm saying, Like we you know,
we we pick our sides, and so when we are
giving our commentary about you know, various characters online, that
often comes with talking our shit for people who are like,
you know, don't talk shit about Lisa Barlowe. You know,
(04:18):
they're like, that's my queen. You know what I'm saying.
And I'm out there being like, well, you know, I
got something you have to say, you know, and that
is often met with, you know, feedback.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Listen. I'm fascinated by you because you are a straight
white male, you're married, you have a beautiful daughter, River,
but you understand housewives in a way that I haven't
heard from a straight guy talk to me about, Like,
how are you able to understand the complexities of housewives
(04:52):
the way you do a football game.
Speaker 3 (04:55):
Well, first of all, thank you. I feel like when
especially Bravo World, they're very protective of their Bravo celebrities.
So it's been an initiation to just like when we
were like, hey, we're you know, we're gonna start talking
about Bravo, and I think that was met with a
(05:17):
lot of like oh really, you know, obviously I come
from the reality TV space being a part of like Batterination,
and just like I think they're all all realit. TV
isn't made the same, but there are all there are
a lot of similarities just how really TV is produced
(05:38):
and just kind of those inner working So I definitely
have a PhD in reality TV in general, and and
I think that's helped just relate to from a TV standpoint.
Ever since I've been a part of Batriination, I've had
an audience predominantly of women. I have six sisters. I
(05:58):
as someone who's as a straight male who's dated women,
have always tried to be someone who is willing to
learn and with the goal of being like a good partner.
And I've always just been fascinated with interpersonal relationships in
general as someone who like you know, has built part
of our show is just giving like relationship advice to
(06:20):
all people a lot. Again, with my audience being predominantly women,
I've learned from them as much as I hope they've
learned from me. And so again, like I also you
know not to go you know super deep. I think
you know clearly, we obviously live in a time where
identity is often talked about, you know, in terms of
(06:42):
like who we are. But I still I really think
as someone who as a straight white guy who's covered
really TV and has had an audience of women and
has learned from them as much as I have that
as people, we have way more similarities than we have differences.
You know, there are certainly differences that you know, we
(07:02):
all have. And so when it comes to interpersonal relationships
and the things that trigger us and how our egos
play a role in decisions that we make, humans will
human and I think, you know, not trying to I again,
so to that degree, I've often looked for the ways
(07:22):
I'm more similar with my audience or with like the
Bravo house with the Housewives. I've been activated before, I
have led with my ego. I have felt embarrassed, I
have felt humiliated. I have been prideful, you know, I,
you know, in all those things, and like that's ultimately
what we're breaking down with Housewives, and so I think,
(07:45):
I think all of that kind of goes into it.
And then you know, I also try to bring the
level of perspective that we're as the outsider, you know,
you know, as the person who like from you know,
from the male point of view, you know, which again
is part often criticized and critiqued, but like I also
(08:06):
think even for my you know, like our critics of
our show are number ones, you know, we love them
like without without them, you know, it's hard to have
a show, especially the type of show that we have, because,
like you, people like you know, they want they want
to listen because like I hope, I hope that we're
(08:26):
creating a community with a common shared interest in like
housewives and reality TV. And just like as a sports fan,
I am looking for takes not just to agree with,
but also to disagree with. I want to like I
want them to like make me think about well that's
an interesting point, or like, you know, just to to
(08:46):
care about things. I think we live in a world
where it's it's it's hard to care about things these days,
or are we're told to care about things that like
honestly are just so goddamn divisive that like reality TV
brings it it's like hopefully something that is fun, a
little messy, a little but ultimately like something that brings
us together.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
No, I could not agree with you more. And I
think the reason why your podcast is such a huge
success is because you do have a voice in this
reality landscape. I mean, we always talk about the Housewives fandom,
but what I have learned Nick, is there is nothing
like the Bachelor Nation.
Speaker 3 (09:23):
I think Bravo is its match for sure.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Who has the craziest fan base Bachelor Nation or Housewives?
Speaker 3 (09:34):
I think I think both. And here's what I mean
by that is because like as okay, so as someone
who comes from Batchnation, Yeah, i was the villain on
my first at least first season, debatable on the second season.
But I've always been like controversial and this was before
I ever watched vander Pump or Housewives. And I was
(09:56):
controversial for interrupting or you know. I was controversial for
like not being there to make friends, you know, uh
where Jack's was controversial for fucking a stripper in Vegas
and gaslighting his friends and multiply and cheating, you know,
getting arrested and cheating on his partner. And so the
(10:18):
for me, it was like, wait, I started watching Bravo,
I was like, excuse me, what are they? What is
going on in this universe? And so just the level
of like just the things that people are doing and so,
which is why you could argue that Bravo Nation is
way more intense because they are they're sweating the small stuff,
(10:40):
you know, they're freaking out over just absolutely nothing, you know,
where you're just like, wait, how how is this? How
are people reacting to this? Because it's you know, it's
network television, it's ABC, Disney and so like they're they're
not really talk you know, like so and so I
think that it's it's creating because people. I think people
(11:02):
just want to they want drama on their lives. We
all say we don't want drama, and we all we
all do, and so I think Brava, I mean, I
think batter Nation, It's fan base is often looking for
things that it's not even there. They're you know, they're
blowing things out of proportion. They will see a scene
between two people and and then be so confidently convinced
(11:24):
that that person's gasoling this other person, where it's like
are you sure? Like are you are we watching the
same thing? Like maybe, but like you might be jumping
to conclusions where I think you have Bravo World where
you're you they in the best possible way, they're you know,
it's cable. They you know, they have a lot more leeway.
They're talking about some way more messier topics, and so
(11:49):
then you have other things that are more mundane, that
are kind of like swept under the rug. Right. But
that being said, I think the intensity is probably the
same both fan bases, you know, like like well, like
Love Island, right, Like Love Island right now number one,
it's the number one, right. And I was talking to
a former Bachelor producer and he was like, listen, like
(12:12):
is you know, because then that's when you have people
like stalking the talent, right finding old tweets. Look, you know,
it's like people will like bring up the you know,
something from like eight years ago. I'm like, where did
they find this stuff? And it would be like someone
who like I went to a party with this person
and I knew them and they're in the background of
the photo and they're you know, but like that just
(12:35):
speaks to how popular that that show is. Because the
larger the fan base there there are, they're crazy online
people everywhere, and so the larger the show, the more
popular the show, the more intense fan base becomes. And
so but to that point, I'm just saying, like you
know blog Bravo has its bloggers, they have their people
(12:55):
on Reddit, they have their people deep diving its cast members.
Bacher Nation has it as well. And at the height
of batternation. Yeah, it's just like they you know, they're
they're doing the background checks, you know, like you know,
to get on the show. You know, all these people
say they have background checks, and then and then all
of a sudden, the fans get involved and they're like, no, no, no,
let's let's will we'll do the background checks and you
(13:18):
and you really know how popular a show is when
they're you know, I don't think it's that productive or
often right, but like when they're when they're deep diving
every little thing about their past and critiquing every little
thing and making you know, and breaking it down and
you know, and all those things. But I would say
equally intense, but just intense in different ways.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
And that's the thing about you, because you have this
confidence and you are like this tall, attractive man you
clearly can probably you're married now, but I'm pretty sure
there's single days. There's never been a woman who was
like not interested in you.
Speaker 3 (13:55):
Sure does that?
Speaker 2 (13:57):
I mean, he's a tall glass of water Natalie, you
did well, my girl. With that being said, you're one
of eleven children growing up in a Catholic household, you're
the second oldest. Correct, I'm one of ten kids?
Speaker 3 (14:15):
Oh really?
Speaker 2 (14:16):
Yes, no, so I get you. Listen, I'm the middle.
I'm number five out of ten. You're number two out
of eleven. I still felt that as a child growing
up in that big household, you always had to find
your place and your own identity outside of your siblings.
And it's not sort of coincidental that you and I
(14:40):
coming from big families, we sort of carved our own path.
I was talking to you earlier about this on the
drive here. I am so impressed with you because there's
a lot of bachelors who's done a season infamous times
you never hear from them again. And I think there's
(15:03):
something about you and I growing up in big families
to where when shit got tough, you had your siblings
humbling you and you.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Have to figure shit out.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
And do you credit your childhood with the way you've
been able to even surpass your predecessors on Bachelor?
Speaker 3 (15:24):
And you're very humble.
Speaker 2 (15:25):
But I said this to you earlier, Nick, you have
really built this media empire.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
Well, thank you. I called it a media boutique. Yea,
I hope to We're growing, you know, I'm very proud
of how we've grown. You know, we just moved into
a brand new office space and a brand new studio,
which is very exciting for us. And the first office
space that like we rented was like I had. It
was like me and tular employees, and I was like,
(15:51):
I don't even know if we need this, but like sure,
you know, trying to like act the part. So it's
very exciting to like to grow. But like obviously we're
still very small and boutiquey. But yeah, I definitely think
my family upbringing played a role. Right Like we were.
My parents were very blue collar. I had amazing parents
(16:11):
in an amazing childhood, but like out of necessity, I saw
I always saw them worry about money. And I again,
I had a very privileged and great childhood relative to
like you know, the I guess so many people. But
like again, I always saw my parents worry about money. Uh.
They gave us everything we needed, but everything we wanted
(16:32):
we had to earn, you know, and so rip. But
our neighbor who recently just passed, like my first job
was in my I have a great my mom has
an amazing work ethic. I get my work ethic from
my mom. But my first job was being like seven
eight years old and our neighbors were tearing out their
(16:54):
old floor and I was just like with like a
thing like screw being the floor for like two bucks
an hour or like the next day at church, I
couldn't move my hands. But that was, you know, and
I remember they were like, you know, you can stop.
But like, you know, I've always had that, you know again,
like I wanted things, my parents couldn't afford it, and
(17:16):
so you know, the ability to earn was something that
like it allowed me to do things. So I think
maybe that was instilled in me early on, and then
like I guess like just you know, I've I've carried
that forward and you know, I do have you know,
I've been asked a lot recently in terms of like
what what I thinks has separated me from my peers
(17:39):
and allowed us, you know, me and my team to
have the success that we've had. But I think a
lot of people would would would roll their eyes about
people calling me humble. I have an immense amount of
confidence in myself, that is for sure, and that's not bad. Yeah,
and but yeah, I mean I've given feedback to my peers,
(18:03):
various peers at time that wasn't i know, wasn't received
very well about like, don't be a reality TV diva.
Understand the difference between the access you have and the
credibility you have. And I've always said, like being on
reality TV as a reality TV star gives you almost
unlimited access in this in this town, which is infinitely invaluable.
(18:28):
I don't know if that makes sense, but it's super valuable.
But it gives you no credibility.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
This is reality with the King, and I'm Carlos King.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
Let's get back into the show.
Speaker 3 (18:40):
You're a circus act to some people, but you're still
getting in rooms. And if you're getting in rooms with people,
you have a chance to build your own credibility because
like you're starting at the bottom, you know, like you know,
they have low expectations of you. They think you're probably
dumb and don't have the same whatever work ethic, but
(19:02):
whatever you do show them. Uh. And then if you
have humility and if you talk about if you ask
for help rather than for or you've asked for advice
or for help in terms of like guidance, but not
necessarily like a favor, or you don't come in with
an expectation of, Hey, I'm the lead of this show
(19:22):
and I'm a big deal in what acting jobs do
you have for me? I'm from the Midwest, and so
when I went on The Bachelor, even as like the villain,
everyone in my circle in the Midwest was like, you've
made it. You know, you were it. We're gonna you're
you're gonna be on this billboard, You're gonna be getting this,
and you're gonna be getting that. Because to them it
was like it was a huge deal. You know, for
(19:43):
three years, I was on ABC every Monday night, you know,
for various things. But it it you don't have any credibility.
And I think a lot of I think a lot
of people you know burn bridges and and and there's
a like sense of entitlement I think for some people.
(20:05):
And and I also like tried and failed at a
lot of things. You know, between coming off of Dancing
with Stars Dancing with the Stars, which is I think
you know you have you know, the Bachelor kind of trajectory.
It's like, you know, you transition, get you hope, you
get dancing with the stars, and then it's kind of
like then things get real slow, real fast. And like
(20:28):
I said, I, you know, I there was a period
of time where I was on ABC every Monday night
for two plus years, which you you kind of take
for granted at the time, and then all of a sudden,
you're just you're done. You know. Then you might get
an opportunity here, a stunt cast there, and and things
(20:49):
like that, but things slow down real fast, and I
you know, I had to figure it out, and I've
you know, I did a lot of I did try to.
I tried and failed at a lot of things, and
I finally, yeah, I found my thing in podcasting. And
I've I was lucky enough to you know, I was
I was thirty three when I when I got on TV,
(21:10):
so I had the benefit of having a decade long
career in corporate America. And I just was like, so
I knew what I was giving up in the sense
that like, I didn't move to La to like party,
and I didn't move to La to like I came
here to work, you know, I was just trying to
(21:31):
pivot my career and so with that said, you know
I I you know, I always you know, coming from Corford, America,
you have this kind of Monday through Friday mindset. Uh
even like and there are a lot of days I
just had nothing, nothing to do, you know, I was like,
what do I do today? And you have this very
like anxious feeling of being unproductive, and so there are
(21:54):
still days I was like, I guess I'll I don't know,
but I would go to the coffee shop and go
to coffee, and like when I was in sales and
i'd work from home. I tried to stay busy and
be productive. And whether it was networking or whether I
was taking improv classes or things like that, I just
I tried to figure it out. And I think I
just kind of I had that mindset that this is
a job, rather than a mindset of like how how
(22:17):
more famous I can be because I don't, I don't
even like I I'd rather just have money and power
and like you can take the fame.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
You don't like being famous.
Speaker 3 (22:27):
I'm aware of its advantages and I certainly appreciate the
things that come with it, but it's a headache. I mean, Ben,
I think Ben Affleck was recently interviewed, and I forget
where about something like this. The money's great, access is great,
you know, but the the what does fame really gets you?
It's a headache, you know, Like other than like you're
filling your ego of importance and things like that, it's
(22:49):
there's it brings unnecessary attention. And I at the stage
of my life where I am trying to make my
world smaller and my my you know, my family, my
immediate family, my wife, my daughter, We're trying to grow
our family obviously, my extended family, my siblings, my friends.
Like I only care about that. I'm I'm almost completely offline,
(23:14):
you know. I'm lucky enough to have people post for me.
I'm like, I'm eighty five percent offline, you know, but
like sports and stuff, but like, yeah, I'm just tunnel vision.
Like creatively, I don't. I used to like look at
charts and I used to look at numbers. I'm lucky
enough to have people do that for me. I'm only
thinking about the future. I don't like I you know,
(23:37):
if someone if if we're heading the wrong direction from
a show standpoint, I have people to like let me know.
But for the most part, I'm only focused on like
making the next show, growing the show, and like again,
like I'm very focused on like where my energy is going,
you know, And so our energy is not intangible. It
(23:57):
is not like what you think about matter, if you're
thinking about whatever, I don't know, Like as fun as
this is to think about housewives, like, you know, I'm
lucky enough that I can think about housewives and it's
a part of my business, you know, But if I am,
if I am thinking about, for example, a criticism I
might receive from a fan or an audience member, that
(24:18):
ultimately is just criticism, right maybe not you not you know,
I didn't do anything wrong other than like said something
that upsets someone, and and they have the right to
feel the way they feel. It serves me. It doesn't
serve me to dwell on that, to focus on that,
to get people to like me. That's not my responsibility.
(24:39):
It is not my job. It's I have to take
care of my people. I have employees to you know,
try to mentor or and be a good boss to them,
and family members to be a good family member and
friends and be a good friends. Like I am not
trying to be likable to my audience.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
It's interesting because I want to get back to, like
you said, you were once considered this villain, this controversial
figure when you enter the Bachelor landscape. I did an
interview with Tiffany Pollard, who goes by New York and
she's known for the flavor of Love, and I did
(25:20):
an interview with her, and she said, I knew going
in that I played up this character because it benefited me,
and that's how it was able getty spin offs and
be iconic and being a house of villains as of today.
Was it methodical for you entering that space or did
you unfortunately get on some people call the villain edit, Yeah,
(25:41):
and you kind of just lean into it.
Speaker 3 (25:43):
It was definitely not methodical, and I certainly didn't lean
into it because like, as much as like I just said,
it's not my job to be liked, I want to
be liked. I'd prefer to be liked. I've never enjoyed
being the villain. And because like, because the way Bachelor
Nation is, like I always say, like one thing I
(26:05):
learned about that show is like it taught you that
you're you can feel in love and not be in love.
It's a manufactured world that manufactures feelings, but the feelings
I felt in that moment were very real. And with
that being said, it is I think it is emotionally
hard for that universe because, like, from what I understand
(26:25):
about like the different like the say Bravo World, in
Bachelor World, Bachelor is the most one of the most authentic.
It is incredibly stage, but it's in no way scripted,
you know, in my stage, I mean, you know, it's
a it's a stage atmosphere. Love is blind, you know, pods,
that's a state, that's a controlled atmosphere. You know, so
like they are. It's a literal science experiment of like
(26:49):
these are the parameters in which you're falling in love,
but like the conversations you want to have, like that's up,
that's up to you. And so if you're in that
environment and you are feeling these intense feelings, it sucks
to be made the villain for something that feels authentic
to you and you're leading with your heart and you're
(27:09):
and you're doing and then have that be portrayed in
a way that you were like, well that's first of all,
that's not what happened. Second of all, like it sucks
to have something that was so emotionally like meaningful to
you be be you know, critiqued and torn apart rather
than being like, hey, I'm just playing a character and
like you know, and things like that. But I never
(27:31):
cared enough to have it change me trying to be
authentic because I just learned early on that like, they're
gonna do what they want to do, and by day,
I mean the networks, the people in the editing room,
like they are they can you know, I still think
more people in reality TV are made to look better
(27:53):
than they are made to look worse, but no one
acknowledges that, as we talked about on my show the
other day. But every once in a while, someone gets
a bad beat, someone takes it on the chin. You know,
sometimes you are portraying in a way that feels unfair
and there's nothing you can do about it, but the
most thing you can do. And I think and that's
(28:15):
why Bravo, like any reality TV star, if you have
the benefit of being on multiple seasons, like if it's
a one off, you know, there's only so much. You know,
sometimes you take it on the chain and there's not
much you can do, right, But if you're a housewife.
If you've been a recurring character like I was for
a period of time on Bachelor, if you can be authentic,
(28:35):
you know people, you will find your fan base, you
will find your lane. There will be people who say,
you know what, I resonate with that person, I fuck
with him or her. And you know, Ashley ian Connetti
for Bachtriination, seems like she's gonna be a new housewife
from Rhode Island, Okay, But like she is someone who
like her first appearance on Bachelor, she was she had
(28:58):
a big personality and she was goofy and a little eccentric,
and she was met with because of Batterination, which is
like they like their very prim and proper polite. You
know that those are all the fan favorites season one.
It's just like the unproblematic king or queens who are
just like gentlemen and ladies and whatever. And Ashley was Ashley,
(29:20):
and she got a lot of criticism season one, but
she kept coming back and she was always the same Ashley,
and so that was like, now I can trust that person,
you know. And I think when when you see housewives
be consistent with who they are, you know, we you'll
it's not about Yeah you have, you'll have your critics.
But it's like, and so many people, I will say
(29:41):
in batter Nation, and I've said this to a handful
of alumni, they make the mistake of expecting to be
universally loved, you know, because a lot of them will
go on our first season and be the overwhelming fan favorites.
But like, and you can get you can that can
happen in a one off situation. You know, for a
one season you could be the fan favorite and it's
(30:01):
hard to find criticism. But people are the people don't
That gets boring. So when you go back, people are
gonna be like, all right, what can we hate? You know,
And it's just like and I think some people can
handle that. And I think that's you know, to go
on reality TV and expect to be universally loved is
a little arrogant, you know, because because reality TV it's
(30:25):
it's we are. The reason why it's so fun to
watch is because we're all. It's it's like it's the
Sex and the City. I'm Miranda, you know kind of thing.
You're you're finding you're who am I? And who are
the people who I am?
Speaker 2 (30:39):
Not?
Speaker 3 (30:40):
You know, and you want to protect the people you
connect with, and you want to you know, kind of
criticize the people you don't because sometimes the people you're
watching on reality, like the people who hate me, you know,
they don't know me, but I guarantee I remind them
of someone they dated or fuck them over, and not
that you know, not that I am that person, but
(31:00):
they only have to see one moment of from something
they see on TV or something they heard on my
show to be like to be triggered, to be activated
and be like, I don't know why it is about
his face, but I fuck you. I do not fuck
with him, you know. And it's not me. It's just
someone that they can that I remind them of, you know.
And so I've learned to accept that and not try
(31:24):
to fight it.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
Well, no, I think it's the fact that you embrace
it all and listen, you're humble to me in the
sense of and this is coming from a producer who's
done Housewives since two thousand and eight, so that's like
going on, you know, more than seventeen years. And when
former housewives are off the show and they try to
(31:49):
dibble and dabble in other things, I always say to them,
but you have to be consistent if you want to
do something outside of that show. The viol Files is
a humongous fucking hit. Dude, It's a huge podcast. It's no, no, no,
it's huge. And the reason why I want to give
(32:09):
you credit for the success of that nick is because
I know so many reality starts with potential, but their
lack of consistency derails them from ever being seen outside
of anything than their previous effort. Your consistency of this
podcast has made it arguably, you know, a top ten
(32:32):
of podcasts that people love. You are able to get
all the guests you want. I'm sure no one tells
you no for real, but talk to me about the
fact that the life after reality television is hard and
you can fall in terms of being infamous.
Speaker 3 (32:50):
But dude, you were.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
Able to really be consistent, and I really want you
to talk about the fact that it's not like somebody
give you a podcasts and all of a sudden it's
a hit. Like I was on hit show and he
has a team.
Speaker 3 (33:03):
You have a team.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
This is a real business. This is a real fucking business,
and it's all because you were able to reach your
sales background being one of a loving children. You were
able to say I got this opportunity. Other things failed,
but at least I did it. But talk to me
about the consistency. That really afforded you to say, like, dude,
(33:25):
you have a fucking hit mainstream podcast as a former
reality star.
Speaker 3 (33:32):
Thanks again for the compliment. I always say, like shavings
make a pile. I learned that in my corporate days,
but I really believe in it. Right. It's like you
and you always have to play the long game. And
that's something I think a lot of people in the
reality TV space don't do or or understand. It's like,
you know, you can't live and die by every success
(33:55):
or failure. When you're high, you gotta like you gotta
humble yourself and know it won't last. When you're low,
you also have to like pick yourself up and know
it won't last, and just again be be consistent. I
also just like love what I do and I love
it and I always like, you know, the confidence is
like I've always liked. When I started the show, there
(34:16):
was always a part of me that was like I
deserve to be this, you know, like I not that
I deserve, but this show deserves to be talked about
with the biggest shows out there before it ever was.
I just I always acted like it should and I
still act like that. People definitely say no to us
(34:40):
for various reasons, but like, you know, it's funny when
my publicist is here with us, and if you heard
my manager, I'm always bitching, like I act like this
show as failing every day. Yeah, I asked my wife,
like it's I am in a constant stay of panic
(35:02):
about how this show is doing. And that's something I
personally have to work on a little bit. But there,
you know, and that is like just like managing my
mental health and having that balance. But and I think
that comes from like being one of eleven, that scarcity mindset,
you know of like just like you know, and I'll
go away, you know, like and but yeah, and I'm
(35:25):
you know, my I'm always like my wife and I
talk about that a lot, where it's just like we
are very grateful of where we're at in our lives,
but there's a recognition that it's it's not guaranteed in
the future, and so like we want to keep working hard.
And yeah, I mean, like listen, I'm lucky enough to
do this for a living and so it's kind of like, well,
let's see what we can build it, you know, And yeah,
(35:48):
and I'm doing things I never imagined I would do,
you know, And yeah, I don't know. It's just like
it's it's a lot of fun and and it's it's
cool to see and like more importantly, like now, it's
just like at first, I was just trying to you know,
(36:09):
you know, when you first start making money in this space,
it's because I can get social like Instagram or whatever
and things like that. And I was just like in
times of change, but like you know, seven six, seven years,
eight years ago, I was like this, this is, this
is I'm not this is not going to be available
for me in a while. You know. I didn't realize
the influencer market would take off the way it did.
(36:30):
But either way, I was always focused on assuming that
my ability to make money off of Instagram was going
to go away. And I certainly didn't want to rely
on having to go in front of the camera as
a reality TV starter survive. I was, you know, I
didn't want to rely on that. So I was just
always trying to figure out could I make something for
(36:53):
myself in this space? Of entertainment that I could it
could be my own. And so that was step one.
It was just like I was trying not to have
to go back to my old job. That was the
only goal, Like build something that's sustainable so that you
don't have to call up some people and be like, hey, man,
like can I come back? You know? And and then
(37:18):
once I accomplished that goal, it was more like, well,
how big can it go? And now now I get
to take care of my family and you know, and
my parents and do some amazing things that I never
would have imagined doing. And and now I've had. I
have everything I possibly want, and now I'm just trying
to maintain.
Speaker 2 (37:41):
Who's the one guess you want on your show, your
dream guest?
Speaker 3 (37:47):
Well, if I say in reality, there's reality TV and
there's non reality. Okay, So I've always said Lana del
Rey in terms of I know she's a big fan
of reality TV. If I her to be incredibly fascinating,
I love her music, Harry Styles would I would be
(38:08):
a big fan. I've always been a big fan of
Ryan Reynolds, and I've met him a few times, and
I hope to have him on in the reality space.
I really want I really honestly want Heather bro No,
I've had Heather out de bro On, so I would
(38:28):
have loved Heather Solake. Yeah. Oh only because well, when
I Heather was supposed to come on, what happened. Heather's afraid.
I Also, I think Heather's mad at me because I've
had Monicon. They're they're fickle over there. When I first
met Heather. When I first met Heather, it was at
the time it was at the Variety like forty most
(38:49):
powerful women in in in really TV and I I
hadn't watched it like yet, and Heather approaches me and
she's like, Nick, I need come on your show. I
was like, great, my wife's like that it's fucking and
I'm like, okay, you know. And then I quickly was
like oh I quickly and then and that's when I
(39:11):
started watching quickly immediately became a fan of Salt, like
it's so good. And then Heather kind of chickened out.
I think, uh, you know, I've learned how like you
know when yeah, uh is she chickened out? Whatever I
want to say it, I think she checked out. They
do yeah, And and and since then she's been kind
(39:34):
of just punting. And then we've had Monica on a
couple of times, and listen, I don't know what's going
on with that. I've met Monica. You know, I'm not
saying she's my ride and or die of any means,
and I'm not telling her my deepest, darkest secrets. But like,
I don't think she seems alright to me. Ye, she's
(39:55):
been pretty real and authentic, and I mean compared to
I don't anyway, so, but I think there's a lot
of sensitivity there. But I think I'm a huge fan
of Heather as a housewife, and I think her I
don't think she realizes her own potential, and I think
(40:15):
she's probably one of the smartest of that group. And
maybe this is all part of her calculation, But I
think whenever she's ready to step up and be Queen Bee,
she could be, you know, but right now she is
She's just still willing to follow Lisa Barlow or Jenshaw
(40:37):
even though Jen's in prison. And I think when Gina
uh was like is it last season, talked about Heather
was always like the girl in high school who wanted
to be friends with like the popular girls. Like I
was like, Oh my god, that makes so much sense.
And I just think, you know, like he there's a
really strong woman, and I find her to just I
(41:00):
think she's funny and I think she's got a lot there.
But I would love to have a conversation with her
about her, like her, how she moves and and why
she moves the way she does. So I think that
would be a really fascinating conversation. So I hope, Heather,
if you're out there, I mean she's I've I've I've
(41:22):
sent her a handful of texts.
Speaker 2 (41:25):
Does she respond to them?
Speaker 3 (41:26):
She sometimes does, you know, sometimes she says she's not
doing any press right now. Nick, you are so likable.
Speaker 2 (41:35):
I don't understand why people don't like you. You give
me Ryan Reynolds, by the way, it's no surprise that
you want him. You're like Ryan Reynolds esque to me.
Speaker 3 (41:47):
I would refer to as the Walmart Ryan Reynolds on
my Bachelor season, which, honestly, I'll take it's.
Speaker 1 (41:55):
I.
Speaker 3 (41:55):
I told him that when I first met him, and
he reminded me that Walmart is an American brand with
some great deals. I love it.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
Well, speaking of great deals, listen, dude, you made a
deal with God. When you met your wife Natalie. I
was able to meet her when I was on your podcast,
and she is so sweet, so beautiful. I love the
fact that she slid in your d MS, which I'm like,
(42:28):
score for you. But I want to ask you this
because listen, I'm sure she wasn't the first to do that.
When that happened, where you sort of like like, what
made you respond to it?
Speaker 3 (42:41):
Well, may respond to it? I mean I mean that listens.
Instagram's a visual platform. You know, you know what I mean.
But once once we met in person, wait, wait, wait,
do you remember what she said to you? Yeah, she
said you're unreal.
Speaker 2 (43:02):
Yeah, like the lifetime spoop of the Bachelor's show unreal.
Speaker 3 (43:06):
No, I don't think. I don't. I don't know. I
don't think it was a pun, but you know it
could have been. And you said, I don't, I don't
remember specifically. I went and found a picture of her
that she posted and replied to that with like a
question of some kind. She was like walking on the beach,
(43:27):
obviously in a bathing suit, and it was like, you know,
like the short it's something about walking on water, and
I like, are you Jesus or something or something stupid.
It you know, when you're in the moment, it sounds charming,
but yeah, I'm listen, I'm I'm you know, I'm lucky
in so many ways to have now as my partner.
(43:49):
And I say partner not to be politically correct, but
I say it because she's truly my partner. And that's
something I definitely learned from my parents as as like
they've always operated as a team even when raising their kids.
Like for us, they were a united front, and we
we were very much a team, whether it's parenting our daughter,
(44:11):
holding each other accountable in our relationship. You know, I
mean it sounds corny, but like she is. We spend
all our time together. She's my best friend in that
sense of like she's the person I run ideas by,
you know, and she has she's got, I think, an
incredible taste and a keen eye. And then also like
(44:33):
she's one of the she's incredibly funny, and I think,
you know when we you know, this show was three
or some years in existence when I met her, and
she was a surgical tech had she had her own thing,
and at the time when I met her, I very
much like loved that she had her own thing, and
she was passionate about her own thing. And then like,
(44:55):
you know, when we like went public and you know,
she you know, it was like eventually when you're gonna
have a girlfriend on the show, and then you know,
it's like, you know, I took a while. We took
a while, and it happened, and then I was like,
she's funny. You know, she's like she was kind of
a natural. And then it wasn't. I don't remember like
being like a I don't remember like having like a
(45:20):
very specific thought about like or a pitch, but it
kind of happened organically, and I was like, yeah, you know,
like I've always been a male host with an audience
of women. We've always had women voices on this show.
Most of our guests are predominantly women. But I was like, she,
you know, I always felt like she was like I
(45:43):
think I when I as more she came on, I
felt like, you know, you really you're kind of the
missing piece of this show in a sense. And we
started doing the going deeper episodes, and again, I think
I've put a lot of effort as an interviewer and
as a host understanding who my audiences understanding that as
a straight white male, I have to be self aware
(46:09):
about the topics we cover and the questions I ask
and things like that. And I I think I do
a good job of handling those topics and having the
appropriate amount of empathy. But having my wife by my
side as a woman who has her own lived experiences
and in adversity she's had to overcome. Yeah, I mean
(46:33):
it rounds out, you know, some of those conversations in
the best possible way. And again, I think she's hilarious
and she's a lot of fun and and yeah, to me,
I I always say like she's the star of of
of the show. She's the star of our relationship. I
work really hard and I know enough to be dangerous,
(46:53):
but like she is effortless in her talents and she's
she's like she's a great partner both in life and
on the show. Know I mean, there're a Kleenex.
Speaker 2 (47:03):
So that was so kind.
Speaker 3 (47:05):
Oh it's all true.
Speaker 2 (47:06):
Yeah, No, I mean, it's the it's the fact that
you're able to emote in that way because you know,
it's it's it's nice to hear a husband speak of
his wife in that way. So I find that to be.
Speaker 3 (47:24):
I think it's well, thank you, and uh, I think
it's really important. As someone who like talks about relationships,
I think it's really important for couples to protect their
relationship to I mean, I I'll have blown out like now,
and I will be out with other people and couples
where it's like the way they will bicker in front
of us or other people, you know, like I always
(47:49):
you know, we now like that we work hard on
our relationship and like every relationship, you know, like we
work through issues and we work through things. But we
very much when I'm great, like, we protect our relationship,
you know, and so we you know, we do couples therapy,
we work through you know. And so I think it's important,
especially for men to speak kindly publicly about their partners
(48:15):
and advocate for their partners. And again, nothing I'm saying
is nothing I don't believe about my wife. But I
think it's very you know, it's just like you just
see so many couples out there, like you know, you're like,
oh my god, Chad. Yeah, it's just you see it
(48:38):
in some of the BRAVA celebrities where it's just the
way they throw their partners under the bus. It's like,
oh my god, like like you know, it's just like, hey,
you're willing to take the bullet for me today. You know,
it's like, oh my god. You know, but yeah, and
you know, I think you know, and you know, for
(48:59):
all the it's the couples I think in reality TV
who have been able to work. You know, I think
probably the common threat is they've prioritized their relationships over
their brand with their audience and play the long game
and haven't sold anyone out for their own personal benefit.
Speaker 2 (49:22):
No, and I love that. I mean, listen, you two
are now holes of eight Netflix dating series launching in
twenty twenty six, Age of Attraction, which is such a
great vehicle for the two of you because you guys
have an eighteen year age gap. So what better holes
to really showcase that age is nothing but a number
when it comes to fighting love. I want to talk
(49:45):
about before I let you go, just about that show
and how it sort of relates to your relationship because
there was an eighteen year age people thinks like, all,
that's so interesting.
Speaker 3 (49:57):
It's a show that focuses on age less dating, and
I think the word age gap has over the you
know kind of has this like negative connotation. I'm really
excited for people to see it. We've heard you know,
obviously we're there for filming it, but you don't know
what you film and how it gets packaged. We've seen
a little bit of it, and the feedback has been
(50:20):
really exciting, and I think there's a lot of people
involved in this project are very excited for its potential.
But you know, well, I guess we'll see. I think,
more importantly, I think it's meant to be aspirational and
inspirational because we now live in a time where I
think we've never been more lonely, you know, and all
the single people out there, if you're listening, you're all
(50:41):
nodding your heads about how difficult dating is. It is.
Everyone feels like there's no good options out there. Obviously,
dating apps have stopped really being our friends in terms
of actually caring about us matching with people. And and
I think this is a this is a show that's
going to focus on compatibility, uh, and showing that there
(51:04):
are if you are willing to open up your mind, Uh,
there are people you can be incredibly compatible with that
you might not initially think of, you know, off the
bat and then obviously, you know, age plays a role
in that. And so it's a show that's going to
(51:24):
focus on love and and connections and and it's gonna
hopefully inspire people who are struggling finding those connections that
there are people out there. And whether it's age or
we have so many self limiting beliefs when it comes
to dating, or we we decide who our types are,
(51:44):
or we have these superficial lists in our head of
what they need to be. And that's often perpetuated by
like dating apps, right, because like it's like you know six',
two you know, finance you, know things like. That but
it's it's compatible ability THAT i think what's what makes
people really fall in love and stand the test of.
(52:04):
Time you, know my wife AND i we have an
age difference in our, relationship but without, question easily she's
the Person i've been most compatible. With she's the person
that is the first Relationship i've ever had where we didn't.
Compete we actually we were each other's. Cheerleaders we, Love
we spend all our time. Together we like a lot
of the SAME tv shows and. Movies we like a
(52:27):
lot of the same. Foods you, know everything is not
a negotiation with. Us i've been in relationships where you think, like,
well love will conquer all and every day is LIKE
i don't want to eat, that and she's, like why
DON'T i eat? That you, know and you're like every you,
know and like, that that just gets. Exhausting like relationships
are hard, enough and so like finding people that you
(52:48):
are compatible, with that you have the same similar, interests
that you share the same. Things you, know we might
have an age difference in our, relationship BUT i quickly
learned that WHEN i Met, noally she she was excited
about like having a, family and AND i was, like, oh,
well so AM, i you, know and and and that worked,
out you, know and and so you, know she she
(53:12):
had a very different child THAN i, had and but you,
know in a childhood that like she she was doing
a lot of the same things in her late teens
and early twenties THAT i was doing in my you,
know early, thirties you. Know and so at the time
when we, met we were both ready to enter a
stage of life that was. Compatible AND i think it's
this is a show that was going to focus on
(53:34):
looking for the people you're most compatible with and not
getting bogged down by you, know what society might think
or what your friends might. Think but if you truly
can find someone that you enjoy spending time, with that
makes you feel, good, uh and that you you, know
fall in love, with AND i think there's a lot
of hope AND i AND i AND i AND i
(53:55):
think that's What age Of attraction is going to bring.
People so what's next to?
Speaker 2 (53:58):
YOU i feel like you've done a lot Of it's,
like what's next For?
Speaker 3 (54:01):
NICK i just want to enjoy WHAT i? Have you, know,
OBVIOUSLY i MEAN i will always try to grow envy
media in The Viole, files for. SURE i am trying
to enjoy WHAT i. Have objectively, Speaking i've surpassed all
my wildest, dreams both professionally and. Personally we certainly hope
(54:23):
to grow our. Family so a lot of just more
of WHAT i, have but also but also working out
enjoying it because that's A i'm not good at. That. Yeah, Good,
well look where can people feel?
Speaker 2 (54:39):
Like everyone knows where to find? You but where can
people find?
Speaker 1 (54:42):
You support?
Speaker 2 (54:43):
You the podcast?
Speaker 3 (54:44):
YOU i know you have many REALITY tv fans who
passionately listen to your. Show so, yeah if you haven't
if you're not already subscribed to The Vole files or
we haven't checked us, out do. So our reality recaps
are Every tuesday And, thursday and we cover a variety
(55:05):
of REALITY tv shows and have a variety of, guests
both people on REALITY tv and people who love REALITY.
Tv are going deepers every ends every Every wednesday are
more your traditional podcast format where it's a sit down
with a public, figure often a REALITY tv, star and
we dive deep into who they are WHAT i love
most about those and, like as someone who's been on REALITY,
(55:28):
tv we want to humanize our guests in a way
that makes you feel see them beyond the character they
play ON, tv because all REALITY tv stars are siloed
in a way that is limiting to who they really
are as a. Person and then if you're interested in
like relationship discourse and hearing other people's in our personal relationship,
(55:48):
problems whether it's dating or family, problems and and and
we give some feedback that you can either agree with
and find helpful or you can you, know hate watch
and disagree with and play you, Know Armchair. Therapist that's
the show that's Every monday as.
Speaker 2 (56:03):
Well Perfect, well thank You, NICK i appreciate, you, brother
thank you come back on our.
Speaker 3 (56:09):
SHOW i. Will carlos was ON i don't know when
this comes, out but he was on a recent episode
OF Reali recap AND i hope you come back.
Speaker 2 (56:17):
Again oh, Well i'm allowed to just tell meror to
call me And i'm. There thank, you, guys see you
the next.
Speaker 1 (56:23):
One But reality with The king is executive produced by
Me Carlos, king produced By Lizzie, nimitz and a partnership
with The lack Of Effect. Network you can also find
us on my YouTube channel at Be Carlos king on
The score
Reality with the King is hosted by me, Carlos King.
I'm an executive producer who have produced some of your
favorite shows from the Real Housewives in Atlanta, New Jersey
and my own creation, The Love and Marriage Franchise and
Bell Collective. Every episode we recap reality television from the
Real Housewives Franchise to The Bachelor or Selling Sunset, in
(00:27):
addition to celebrity guests, whether in the unscripted space or
scripted as well. Hey, rain drops on today's episode of
Reality with the King.
Speaker 2 (00:39):
I am in the presence of greatness. Ladies, gentlemen, gays
and days.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Give it up for the podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
King the reality icon, the host who does the most
nickle intro. Listen, I'm so happy to talk to you.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
I'm happy, I'm happy to be with you. Thanks for
thanks for having.
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Me so a little behind the scenes t So, I'm
gonna tell you all how much of a great guy
Nick is, because I know people think, oh my god,
he's this or that. Listen. In real life, I had
a studio book.
Speaker 3 (01:10):
From my guy. An hour ago, no one showed up.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
His publicist and Nick were like, let's just pivot and
come to our studio.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
And Nick was like, do you need a ride? I'm like,
I can catch an uber or left or the train.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
He's like, come ride with me, dude. So listen all
of that talk about what this guy does or doesn't do.
I'm here to tell you he is the nicest and
thank you so much for pivoting the way you did.
I don't understand Nick, why people think you're a bad guy.
Speaker 3 (01:42):
Get that. You know, I have opinions, you know, and
I'm white, I'm straight, so well you know. But yeah,
I mean listen, I think, as you know, you know,
just like I think the reality TV space is, you
(02:05):
have to embrace the discourse. You know. I'm always like
reminding my team it is not our jobs to be liked.
It is our job to like give things people to
care about. You know. We want people to be engaged
in what we're doing. We want them to certainly enjoy
being liked, and we want people to agree with us
(02:28):
at times, but it's more important that they care. It's
not interesting to just say the popular thing. We're also
not trying to say things just to be divisive either,
you know, We're not. You know, there's I'm a huge
sports fan and I find it irritating. There's like a
gentleman named Skip Bayliss. For those of you who follow
(02:50):
sports you would know. But like there's certain people in
sports who are just they say things knowing it's going
to get people riled up, like knowing it's going to
be they don't even believe in what they're saying. And
that's certainly something that we we we don't do that,
but we are willing to, like, you know, have an
opinion and allow people disagree with it. And I think,
(03:12):
you know, and and and like in Reality TV, you know,
it's just like I always kind of equate it to
sports because we cover Reality V like sports, where like
I love I love rooting against the Minnesota Vikings as
much as I enjoy rooting for my Green Bay Packers,
you know. So it's like it's it's fun to like
(03:32):
hate on things, as we know as humans, we do
that all the time. And sports is like an outlet
for people to like have a you know, hopefully a
healthy amount of hate. And I think Reality TV for
its fans offer that same outlet where like we're not
just rooting for for Meredith Marx, you know, sometimes we're
rooting against Brittany Bateman. Now I'm a Britney Bateman, Stan,
(03:57):
but you know what I'm saying, Like we you know,
we we pick our sides, and so when we are
giving our commentary about you know, various characters online, that
often comes with talking our shit for people who are like,
you know, don't talk shit about Lisa Barlowe. You know,
(04:18):
they're like, that's my queen. You know what I'm saying.
And I'm out there being like, well, you know, I
got something you have to say, you know, and that
is often met with, you know, feedback.
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Listen. I'm fascinated by you because you are a straight
white male, you're married, you have a beautiful daughter, River,
but you understand housewives in a way that I haven't
heard from a straight guy talk to me about, Like,
how are you able to understand the complexities of housewives
(04:52):
the way you do a football game.
Speaker 3 (04:55):
Well, first of all, thank you. I feel like when
especially Bravo World, they're very protective of their Bravo celebrities.
So it's been an initiation to just like when we
were like, hey, we're you know, we're gonna start talking
about Bravo, and I think that was met with a
(05:17):
lot of like oh really, you know, obviously I come
from the reality TV space being a part of like Batterination,
and just like I think they're all all realit. TV
isn't made the same, but there are all there are
a lot of similarities just how really TV is produced
(05:38):
and just kind of those inner working So I definitely
have a PhD in reality TV in general, and and
I think that's helped just relate to from a TV standpoint.
Ever since I've been a part of Batriination, I've had
an audience predominantly of women. I have six sisters. I
(05:58):
as someone who's as a straight male who's dated women,
have always tried to be someone who is willing to
learn and with the goal of being like a good partner.
And I've always just been fascinated with interpersonal relationships in
general as someone who like you know, has built part
of our show is just giving like relationship advice to
(06:20):
all people a lot. Again, with my audience being predominantly women,
I've learned from them as much as I hope they've
learned from me. And so again, like I also you
know not to go you know super deep. I think
you know clearly, we obviously live in a time where
identity is often talked about, you know, in terms of
(06:42):
like who we are. But I still I really think
as someone who as a straight white guy who's covered
really TV and has had an audience of women and
has learned from them as much as I have that
as people, we have way more similarities than we have differences.
You know, there are certainly differences that you know, we
(07:02):
all have. And so when it comes to interpersonal relationships
and the things that trigger us and how our egos
play a role in decisions that we make, humans will
human and I think, you know, not trying to I again,
so to that degree, I've often looked for the ways
(07:22):
I'm more similar with my audience or with like the
Bravo house with the Housewives. I've been activated before, I
have led with my ego. I have felt embarrassed, I
have felt humiliated. I have been prideful, you know, I,
you know, in all those things, and like that's ultimately
what we're breaking down with Housewives, and so I think,
(07:45):
I think all of that kind of goes into it.
And then you know, I also try to bring the
level of perspective that we're as the outsider, you know,
you know, as the person who like from you know,
from the male point of view, you know, which again
is part often criticized and critiqued, but like I also
(08:06):
think even for my you know, like our critics of
our show are number ones, you know, we love them
like without without them, you know, it's hard to have
a show, especially the type of show that we have, because,
like you, people like you know, they want they want
to listen because like I hope, I hope that we're
(08:26):
creating a community with a common shared interest in like
housewives and reality TV. And just like as a sports fan,
I am looking for takes not just to agree with,
but also to disagree with. I want to like I
want them to like make me think about well that's
an interesting point, or like, you know, just to to
(08:46):
care about things. I think we live in a world
where it's it's it's hard to care about things these days,
or are we're told to care about things that like
honestly are just so goddamn divisive that like reality TV
brings it it's like hopefully something that is fun, a
little messy, a little but ultimately like something that brings
us together.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
No, I could not agree with you more. And I
think the reason why your podcast is such a huge
success is because you do have a voice in this
reality landscape. I mean, we always talk about the Housewives fandom,
but what I have learned Nick, is there is nothing
like the Bachelor Nation.
Speaker 3 (09:23):
I think Bravo is its match for sure.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Who has the craziest fan base Bachelor Nation or Housewives?
Speaker 3 (09:34):
I think I think both. And here's what I mean
by that is because like as okay, so as someone
who comes from Batchnation, Yeah, i was the villain on
my first at least first season, debatable on the second season.
But I've always been like controversial and this was before
I ever watched vander Pump or Housewives. And I was
(09:56):
controversial for interrupting or you know. I was controversial for
like not being there to make friends, you know, uh
where Jack's was controversial for fucking a stripper in Vegas
and gaslighting his friends and multiply and cheating, you know,
getting arrested and cheating on his partner. And so the
(10:18):
for me, it was like, wait, I started watching Bravo,
I was like, excuse me, what are they? What is
going on in this universe? And so just the level
of like just the things that people are doing and so,
which is why you could argue that Bravo Nation is
way more intense because they are they're sweating the small stuff,
(10:40):
you know, they're freaking out over just absolutely nothing, you know,
where you're just like, wait, how how is this? How
are people reacting to this? Because it's you know, it's
network television, it's ABC, Disney and so like they're they're
not really talk you know, like so and so I
think that it's it's creating because people. I think people
(11:02):
just want to they want drama on their lives. We
all say we don't want drama, and we all we
all do, and so I think Brava, I mean, I
think batter Nation, It's fan base is often looking for
things that it's not even there. They're you know, they're
blowing things out of proportion. They will see a scene
between two people and and then be so confidently convinced
(11:24):
that that person's gasoling this other person, where it's like
are you sure? Like are you are we watching the
same thing? Like maybe, but like you might be jumping
to conclusions where I think you have Bravo World where
you're you they in the best possible way, they're you know,
it's cable. They you know, they have a lot more leeway.
They're talking about some way more messier topics, and so
(11:49):
then you have other things that are more mundane, that
are kind of like swept under the rug. Right. But
that being said, I think the intensity is probably the
same both fan bases, you know, like like well, like
Love Island, right, Like Love Island right now number one,
it's the number one, right. And I was talking to
a former Bachelor producer and he was like, listen, like
(12:12):
is you know, because then that's when you have people
like stalking the talent, right finding old tweets. Look, you know,
it's like people will like bring up the you know,
something from like eight years ago. I'm like, where did
they find this stuff? And it would be like someone
who like I went to a party with this person
and I knew them and they're in the background of
the photo and they're you know, but like that just
(12:35):
speaks to how popular that that show is. Because the
larger the fan base there there are, they're crazy online
people everywhere, and so the larger the show, the more
popular the show, the more intense fan base becomes. And
so but to that point, I'm just saying, like you
know blog Bravo has its bloggers, they have their people
(12:55):
on Reddit, they have their people deep diving its cast members.
Bacher Nation has it as well. And at the height
of batternation. Yeah, it's just like they you know, they're
they're doing the background checks, you know, like you know,
to get on the show. You know, all these people
say they have background checks, and then and then all
of a sudden, the fans get involved and they're like, no, no, no,
let's let's will we'll do the background checks and you
(13:18):
and you really know how popular a show is when
they're you know, I don't think it's that productive or
often right, but like when they're when they're deep diving
every little thing about their past and critiquing every little
thing and making you know, and breaking it down and
you know, and all those things. But I would say
equally intense, but just intense in different ways.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
And that's the thing about you, because you have this
confidence and you are like this tall, attractive man you
clearly can probably you're married now, but I'm pretty sure
there's single days. There's never been a woman who was
like not interested in you.
Speaker 3 (13:55):
Sure does that?
Speaker 2 (13:57):
I mean, he's a tall glass of water Natalie, you
did well, my girl. With that being said, you're one
of eleven children growing up in a Catholic household, you're
the second oldest. Correct, I'm one of ten kids?
Speaker 3 (14:15):
Oh really?
Speaker 2 (14:16):
Yes, no, so I get you. Listen, I'm the middle.
I'm number five out of ten. You're number two out
of eleven. I still felt that as a child growing
up in that big household, you always had to find
your place and your own identity outside of your siblings.
And it's not sort of coincidental that you and I
(14:40):
coming from big families, we sort of carved our own path.
I was talking to you earlier about this on the
drive here. I am so impressed with you because there's
a lot of bachelors who's done a season infamous times
you never hear from them again. And I think there's
(15:03):
something about you and I growing up in big families
to where when shit got tough, you had your siblings
humbling you and you.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
Have to figure shit out.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
And do you credit your childhood with the way you've
been able to even surpass your predecessors on Bachelor?
Speaker 3 (15:24):
And you're very humble.
Speaker 2 (15:25):
But I said this to you earlier, Nick, you have
really built this media empire.
Speaker 3 (15:31):
Well, thank you. I called it a media boutique. Yea,
I hope to We're growing, you know, I'm very proud
of how we've grown. You know, we just moved into
a brand new office space and a brand new studio,
which is very exciting for us. And the first office
space that like we rented was like I had. It
was like me and tular employees, and I was like,
(15:51):
I don't even know if we need this, but like sure,
you know, trying to like act the part. So it's
very exciting to like to grow. But like obviously we're
still very small and boutiquey. But yeah, I definitely think
my family upbringing played a role. Right Like we were.
My parents were very blue collar. I had amazing parents
(16:11):
in an amazing childhood, but like out of necessity, I saw
I always saw them worry about money. And I again,
I had a very privileged and great childhood relative to
like you know, the I guess so many people. But
like again, I always saw my parents worry about money. Uh.
They gave us everything we needed, but everything we wanted
(16:32):
we had to earn, you know, and so rip. But
our neighbor who recently just passed, like my first job
was in my I have a great my mom has
an amazing work ethic. I get my work ethic from
my mom. But my first job was being like seven
eight years old and our neighbors were tearing out their
(16:54):
old floor and I was just like with like a
thing like screw being the floor for like two bucks
an hour or like the next day at church, I
couldn't move my hands. But that was, you know, and
I remember they were like, you know, you can stop.
But like, you know, I've always had that, you know again,
like I wanted things, my parents couldn't afford it, and
(17:16):
so you know, the ability to earn was something that
like it allowed me to do things. So I think
maybe that was instilled in me early on, and then
like I guess like just you know, I've I've carried
that forward and you know, I do have you know,
I've been asked a lot recently in terms of like
what what I thinks has separated me from my peers
(17:39):
and allowed us, you know, me and my team to
have the success that we've had. But I think a
lot of people would would would roll their eyes about
people calling me humble. I have an immense amount of
confidence in myself, that is for sure, and that's not bad. Yeah,
and but yeah, I mean I've given feedback to my peers,
(18:03):
various peers at time that wasn't i know, wasn't received
very well about like, don't be a reality TV diva.
Understand the difference between the access you have and the
credibility you have. And I've always said, like being on
reality TV as a reality TV star gives you almost
unlimited access in this in this town, which is infinitely invaluable.
(18:28):
I don't know if that makes sense, but it's super valuable.
But it gives you no credibility.
Speaker 1 (18:34):
This is reality with the King, and I'm Carlos King.
Speaker 2 (18:37):
Let's get back into the show.
Speaker 3 (18:40):
You're a circus act to some people, but you're still
getting in rooms. And if you're getting in rooms with people,
you have a chance to build your own credibility because
like you're starting at the bottom, you know, like you know,
they have low expectations of you. They think you're probably
dumb and don't have the same whatever work ethic, but
(19:02):
whatever you do show them. Uh. And then if you
have humility and if you talk about if you ask
for help rather than for or you've asked for advice
or for help in terms of like guidance, but not
necessarily like a favor, or you don't come in with
an expectation of, Hey, I'm the lead of this show
(19:22):
and I'm a big deal in what acting jobs do
you have for me? I'm from the Midwest, and so
when I went on The Bachelor, even as like the villain,
everyone in my circle in the Midwest was like, you've
made it. You know, you were it. We're gonna you're
you're gonna be on this billboard, You're gonna be getting this,
and you're gonna be getting that. Because to them it
was like it was a huge deal. You know, for
(19:43):
three years, I was on ABC every Monday night, you know,
for various things. But it it you don't have any credibility.
And I think a lot of I think a lot
of people you know burn bridges and and and there's
a like sense of entitlement I think for some people.
(20:05):
And and I also like tried and failed at a
lot of things. You know, between coming off of Dancing
with Stars Dancing with the Stars, which is I think
you know you have you know, the Bachelor kind of trajectory.
It's like, you know, you transition, get you hope, you
get dancing with the stars, and then it's kind of
like then things get real slow, real fast. And like
(20:28):
I said, I, you know, I there was a period
of time where I was on ABC every Monday night
for two plus years, which you you kind of take
for granted at the time, and then all of a sudden,
you're just you're done. You know. Then you might get
an opportunity here, a stunt cast there, and and things
(20:49):
like that, but things slow down real fast, and I
you know, I had to figure it out, and I've
you know, I did a lot of I did try to.
I tried and failed at a lot of things, and
I finally, yeah, I found my thing in podcasting. And
I've I was lucky enough to you know, I was
I was thirty three when I when I got on TV,
(21:10):
so I had the benefit of having a decade long
career in corporate America. And I just was like, so
I knew what I was giving up in the sense
that like, I didn't move to La to like party,
and I didn't move to La to like I came
here to work, you know, I was just trying to
(21:31):
pivot my career and so with that said, you know
I I you know, I always you know, coming from Corford, America,
you have this kind of Monday through Friday mindset. Uh
even like and there are a lot of days I
just had nothing, nothing to do, you know, I was like,
what do I do today? And you have this very
like anxious feeling of being unproductive, and so there are
(21:54):
still days I was like, I guess I'll I don't know,
but I would go to the coffee shop and go
to coffee, and like when I was in sales and
i'd work from home. I tried to stay busy and
be productive. And whether it was networking or whether I
was taking improv classes or things like that, I just
I tried to figure it out. And I think I
just kind of I had that mindset that this is
a job, rather than a mindset of like how how
(22:17):
more famous I can be because I don't, I don't
even like I I'd rather just have money and power
and like you can take the fame.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
You don't like being famous.
Speaker 3 (22:27):
I'm aware of its advantages and I certainly appreciate the
things that come with it, but it's a headache. I mean, Ben,
I think Ben Affleck was recently interviewed, and I forget
where about something like this. The money's great, access is great,
you know, but the the what does fame really gets you?
It's a headache, you know, Like other than like you're
filling your ego of importance and things like that, it's
(22:49):
there's it brings unnecessary attention. And I at the stage
of my life where I am trying to make my
world smaller and my my you know, my family, my
immediate family, my wife, my daughter, We're trying to grow
our family obviously, my extended family, my siblings, my friends.
Like I only care about that. I'm I'm almost completely offline,
(23:14):
you know. I'm lucky enough to have people post for me.
I'm like, I'm eighty five percent offline, you know, but
like sports and stuff, but like, yeah, I'm just tunnel vision.
Like creatively, I don't. I used to like look at
charts and I used to look at numbers. I'm lucky
enough to have people do that for me. I'm only
thinking about the future. I don't like I you know,
(23:37):
if someone if if we're heading the wrong direction from
a show standpoint, I have people to like let me know.
But for the most part, I'm only focused on like
making the next show, growing the show, and like again,
like I'm very focused on like where my energy is going,
you know, And so our energy is not intangible. It
(23:57):
is not like what you think about matter, if you're
thinking about whatever, I don't know, Like as fun as
this is to think about housewives, like, you know, I'm
lucky enough that I can think about housewives and it's
a part of my business, you know, But if I am,
if I am thinking about, for example, a criticism I
might receive from a fan or an audience member, that
(24:18):
ultimately is just criticism, right maybe not you not you know,
I didn't do anything wrong other than like said something
that upsets someone, and and they have the right to
feel the way they feel. It serves me. It doesn't
serve me to dwell on that, to focus on that,
to get people to like me. That's not my responsibility.
(24:39):
It is not my job. It's I have to take
care of my people. I have employees to you know,
try to mentor or and be a good boss to them,
and family members to be a good family member and
friends and be a good friends. Like I am not
trying to be likable to my audience.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
It's interesting because I want to get back to, like
you said, you were once considered this villain, this controversial
figure when you enter the Bachelor landscape. I did an
interview with Tiffany Pollard, who goes by New York and
she's known for the flavor of Love, and I did
(25:20):
an interview with her, and she said, I knew going
in that I played up this character because it benefited me,
and that's how it was able getty spin offs and
be iconic and being a house of villains as of today.
Was it methodical for you entering that space or did
you unfortunately get on some people call the villain edit, Yeah,
(25:41):
and you kind of just lean into it.
Speaker 3 (25:43):
It was definitely not methodical, and I certainly didn't lean
into it because like, as much as like I just said,
it's not my job to be liked, I want to
be liked. I'd prefer to be liked. I've never enjoyed
being the villain. And because like, because the way Bachelor
Nation is, like I always say, like one thing I
(26:05):
learned about that show is like it taught you that
you're you can feel in love and not be in love.
It's a manufactured world that manufactures feelings, but the feelings
I felt in that moment were very real. And with
that being said, it is I think it is emotionally
hard for that universe because, like, from what I understand
(26:25):
about like the different like the say Bravo World, in
Bachelor World, Bachelor is the most one of the most authentic.
It is incredibly stage, but it's in no way scripted,
you know, in my stage, I mean, you know, it's
a it's a stage atmosphere. Love is blind, you know, pods,
that's a state, that's a controlled atmosphere. You know, so
like they are. It's a literal science experiment of like
(26:49):
these are the parameters in which you're falling in love,
but like the conversations you want to have, like that's up,
that's up to you. And so if you're in that
environment and you are feeling these intense feelings, it sucks
to be made the villain for something that feels authentic
to you and you're leading with your heart and you're
(27:09):
and you're doing and then have that be portrayed in
a way that you were like, well that's first of all,
that's not what happened. Second of all, like it sucks
to have something that was so emotionally like meaningful to
you be be you know, critiqued and torn apart rather
than being like, hey, I'm just playing a character and
like you know, and things like that. But I never
(27:31):
cared enough to have it change me trying to be
authentic because I just learned early on that like, they're
gonna do what they want to do, and by day,
I mean the networks, the people in the editing room,
like they are they can you know, I still think
more people in reality TV are made to look better
(27:53):
than they are made to look worse, but no one
acknowledges that, as we talked about on my show the
other day. But every once in a while, someone gets
a bad beat, someone takes it on the chin. You know,
sometimes you are portraying in a way that feels unfair
and there's nothing you can do about it, but the
most thing you can do. And I think and that's
(28:15):
why Bravo, like any reality TV star, if you have
the benefit of being on multiple seasons, like if it's
a one off, you know, there's only so much. You know,
sometimes you take it on the chain and there's not
much you can do, right, But if you're a housewife.
If you've been a recurring character like I was for
a period of time on Bachelor, if you can be authentic,
(28:35):
you know people, you will find your fan base, you
will find your lane. There will be people who say,
you know what, I resonate with that person, I fuck
with him or her. And you know, Ashley ian Connetti
for Bachtriination, seems like she's gonna be a new housewife
from Rhode Island, Okay, But like she is someone who
like her first appearance on Bachelor, she was she had
(28:58):
a big personality and she was goofy and a little eccentric,
and she was met with because of Batterination, which is
like they like their very prim and proper polite. You
know that those are all the fan favorites season one.
It's just like the unproblematic king or queens who are
just like gentlemen and ladies and whatever. And Ashley was Ashley,
(29:20):
and she got a lot of criticism season one, but
she kept coming back and she was always the same Ashley,
and so that was like, now I can trust that person,
you know. And I think when when you see housewives
be consistent with who they are, you know, we you'll
it's not about Yeah you have, you'll have your critics.
But it's like, and so many people, I will say
(29:41):
in batter Nation, and I've said this to a handful
of alumni, they make the mistake of expecting to be
universally loved, you know, because a lot of them will
go on our first season and be the overwhelming fan favorites.
But like, and you can get you can that can
happen in a one off situation. You know, for a
one season you could be the fan favorite and it's
(30:01):
hard to find criticism. But people are the people don't
That gets boring. So when you go back, people are
gonna be like, all right, what can we hate? You know,
And it's just like and I think some people can
handle that. And I think that's you know, to go
on reality TV and expect to be universally loved is
a little arrogant, you know, because because reality TV it's
(30:25):
it's we are. The reason why it's so fun to
watch is because we're all. It's it's like it's the
Sex and the City. I'm Miranda, you know kind of thing.
You're you're finding you're who am I? And who are
the people who I am?
Speaker 2 (30:39):
Not?
Speaker 3 (30:40):
You know, and you want to protect the people you
connect with, and you want to you know, kind of
criticize the people you don't because sometimes the people you're
watching on reality, like the people who hate me, you know,
they don't know me, but I guarantee I remind them
of someone they dated or fuck them over, and not
that you know, not that I am that person, but
(31:00):
they only have to see one moment of from something
they see on TV or something they heard on my
show to be like to be triggered, to be activated
and be like, I don't know why it is about
his face, but I fuck you. I do not fuck
with him, you know. And it's not me. It's just
someone that they can that I remind them of, you know.
And so I've learned to accept that and not try
(31:24):
to fight it.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
Well, no, I think it's the fact that you embrace
it all and listen, you're humble to me in the
sense of and this is coming from a producer who's
done Housewives since two thousand and eight, so that's like
going on, you know, more than seventeen years. And when
former housewives are off the show and they try to
(31:49):
dibble and dabble in other things, I always say to them,
but you have to be consistent if you want to
do something outside of that show. The viol Files is
a humongous fucking hit. Dude, It's a huge podcast. It's no, no, no,
it's huge. And the reason why I want to give
(32:09):
you credit for the success of that nick is because
I know so many reality starts with potential, but their
lack of consistency derails them from ever being seen outside
of anything than their previous effort. Your consistency of this
podcast has made it arguably, you know, a top ten
(32:32):
of podcasts that people love. You are able to get
all the guests you want. I'm sure no one tells
you no for real, but talk to me about the
fact that the life after reality television is hard and
you can fall in terms of being infamous.
Speaker 3 (32:50):
But dude, you were.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
Able to really be consistent, and I really want you
to talk about the fact that it's not like somebody
give you a podcasts and all of a sudden it's
a hit. Like I was on hit show and he
has a team.
Speaker 3 (33:03):
You have a team.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
This is a real business. This is a real fucking business,
and it's all because you were able to reach your
sales background being one of a loving children. You were
able to say I got this opportunity. Other things failed,
but at least I did it. But talk to me
about the consistency. That really afforded you to say, like, dude,
(33:25):
you have a fucking hit mainstream podcast as a former
reality star.
Speaker 3 (33:32):
Thanks again for the compliment. I always say, like shavings
make a pile. I learned that in my corporate days,
but I really believe in it. Right. It's like you
and you always have to play the long game. And
that's something I think a lot of people in the
reality TV space don't do or or understand. It's like,
you know, you can't live and die by every success
(33:55):
or failure. When you're high, you gotta like you gotta
humble yourself and know it won't last. When you're low,
you also have to like pick yourself up and know
it won't last, and just again be be consistent. I
also just like love what I do and I love
it and I always like, you know, the confidence is
like I've always liked. When I started the show, there
(34:16):
was always a part of me that was like I
deserve to be this, you know, like I not that
I deserve, but this show deserves to be talked about
with the biggest shows out there before it ever was.
I just I always acted like it should and I
still act like that. People definitely say no to us
(34:40):
for various reasons, but like, you know, it's funny when
my publicist is here with us, and if you heard
my manager, I'm always bitching, like I act like this
show as failing every day. Yeah, I asked my wife,
like it's I am in a constant stay of panic
(35:02):
about how this show is doing. And that's something I
personally have to work on a little bit. But there,
you know, and that is like just like managing my
mental health and having that balance. But and I think
that comes from like being one of eleven, that scarcity mindset,
you know of like just like you know, and I'll
go away, you know, like and but yeah, and I'm
(35:25):
you know, my I'm always like my wife and I
talk about that a lot, where it's just like we
are very grateful of where we're at in our lives,
but there's a recognition that it's it's not guaranteed in
the future, and so like we want to keep working hard.
And yeah, I mean, like listen, I'm lucky enough to
do this for a living and so it's kind of like, well,
let's see what we can build it, you know, And yeah,
(35:48):
and I'm doing things I never imagined I would do,
you know, And yeah, I don't know. It's just like
it's it's a lot of fun and and it's it's
cool to see and like more importantly, like now, it's
just like at first, I was just trying to you know,
(36:09):
you know, when you first start making money in this space,
it's because I can get social like Instagram or whatever
and things like that. And I was just like in
times of change, but like you know, seven six, seven years,
eight years ago, I was like this, this is, this
is I'm not this is not going to be available
for me in a while. You know. I didn't realize
the influencer market would take off the way it did.
(36:30):
But either way, I was always focused on assuming that
my ability to make money off of Instagram was going
to go away. And I certainly didn't want to rely
on having to go in front of the camera as
a reality TV starter survive. I was, you know, I
didn't want to rely on that. So I was just
always trying to figure out could I make something for
(36:53):
myself in this space? Of entertainment that I could it
could be my own. And so that was step one.
It was just like I was trying not to have
to go back to my old job. That was the
only goal, Like build something that's sustainable so that you
don't have to call up some people and be like, hey, man,
like can I come back? You know? And and then
(37:18):
once I accomplished that goal, it was more like, well,
how big can it go? And now now I get
to take care of my family and you know, and
my parents and do some amazing things that I never
would have imagined doing. And and now I've had. I
have everything I possibly want, and now I'm just trying
to maintain.
Speaker 2 (37:41):
Who's the one guess you want on your show, your
dream guest?
Speaker 3 (37:47):
Well, if I say in reality, there's reality TV and
there's non reality. Okay, So I've always said Lana del
Rey in terms of I know she's a big fan
of reality TV. If I her to be incredibly fascinating,
I love her music, Harry Styles would I would be
(38:08):
a big fan. I've always been a big fan of
Ryan Reynolds, and I've met him a few times, and
I hope to have him on in the reality space.
I really want I really honestly want Heather bro No,
I've had Heather out de bro On, so I would
(38:28):
have loved Heather Solake. Yeah. Oh only because well, when
I Heather was supposed to come on, what happened. Heather's afraid.
I Also, I think Heather's mad at me because I've
had Monicon. They're they're fickle over there. When I first
met Heather. When I first met Heather, it was at
the time it was at the Variety like forty most
(38:49):
powerful women in in in really TV and I I
hadn't watched it like yet, and Heather approaches me and
she's like, Nick, I need come on your show. I
was like, great, my wife's like that it's fucking and
I'm like, okay, you know. And then I quickly was
like oh I quickly and then and that's when I
(39:11):
started watching quickly immediately became a fan of Salt, like
it's so good. And then Heather kind of chickened out.
I think, uh, you know, I've learned how like you
know when yeah, uh is she chickened out? Whatever I
want to say it, I think she checked out. They
do yeah, And and and since then she's been kind
(39:34):
of just punting. And then we've had Monica on a
couple of times, and listen, I don't know what's going
on with that. I've met Monica. You know, I'm not
saying she's my ride and or die of any means,
and I'm not telling her my deepest, darkest secrets. But like,
I don't think she seems alright to me. Ye, she's
(39:55):
been pretty real and authentic, and I mean compared to
I don't anyway, so, but I think there's a lot
of sensitivity there. But I think I'm a huge fan
of Heather as a housewife, and I think her I
don't think she realizes her own potential, and I think
(40:15):
she's probably one of the smartest of that group. And
maybe this is all part of her calculation, But I
think whenever she's ready to step up and be Queen Bee,
she could be, you know, but right now she is
She's just still willing to follow Lisa Barlow or Jenshaw
(40:37):
even though Jen's in prison. And I think when Gina
uh was like is it last season, talked about Heather
was always like the girl in high school who wanted
to be friends with like the popular girls. Like I
was like, Oh my god, that makes so much sense.
And I just think, you know, like he there's a
really strong woman, and I find her to just I
(41:00):
think she's funny and I think she's got a lot there.
But I would love to have a conversation with her
about her, like her, how she moves and and why
she moves the way she does. So I think that
would be a really fascinating conversation. So I hope, Heather,
if you're out there, I mean she's I've I've I've
(41:22):
sent her a handful of texts.
Speaker 2 (41:25):
Does she respond to them?
Speaker 3 (41:26):
She sometimes does, you know, sometimes she says she's not
doing any press right now. Nick, you are so likable.
Speaker 2 (41:35):
I don't understand why people don't like you. You give
me Ryan Reynolds, by the way, it's no surprise that
you want him. You're like Ryan Reynolds esque to me.
Speaker 3 (41:47):
I would refer to as the Walmart Ryan Reynolds on
my Bachelor season, which, honestly, I'll take it's.
Speaker 1 (41:55):
I.
Speaker 3 (41:55):
I told him that when I first met him, and
he reminded me that Walmart is an American brand with
some great deals. I love it.
Speaker 2 (42:06):
Well, speaking of great deals, listen, dude, you made a
deal with God. When you met your wife Natalie. I
was able to meet her when I was on your podcast,
and she is so sweet, so beautiful. I love the
fact that she slid in your d MS, which I'm like,
(42:28):
score for you. But I want to ask you this
because listen, I'm sure she wasn't the first to do that.
When that happened, where you sort of like like, what
made you respond to it?
Speaker 3 (42:41):
Well, may respond to it? I mean I mean that listens.
Instagram's a visual platform. You know, you know what I mean.
But once once we met in person, wait, wait, wait,
do you remember what she said to you? Yeah, she
said you're unreal.
Speaker 2 (43:02):
Yeah, like the lifetime spoop of the Bachelor's show unreal.
Speaker 3 (43:06):
No, I don't think. I don't. I don't know. I
don't think it was a pun, but you know it
could have been. And you said, I don't, I don't
remember specifically. I went and found a picture of her
that she posted and replied to that with like a
question of some kind. She was like walking on the beach,
(43:27):
obviously in a bathing suit, and it was like, you know,
like the short it's something about walking on water, and
I like, are you Jesus or something or something stupid.
It you know, when you're in the moment, it sounds charming,
but yeah, I'm listen, I'm I'm you know, I'm lucky
in so many ways to have now as my partner.
(43:49):
And I say partner not to be politically correct, but
I say it because she's truly my partner. And that's
something I definitely learned from my parents as as like
they've always operated as a team even when raising their kids.
Like for us, they were a united front, and we
we were very much a team, whether it's parenting our daughter,
(44:11):
holding each other accountable in our relationship. You know, I
mean it sounds corny, but like she is. We spend
all our time together. She's my best friend in that
sense of like she's the person I run ideas by,
you know, and she has she's got, I think, an
incredible taste and a keen eye. And then also like
(44:33):
she's one of the she's incredibly funny, and I think,
you know when we you know, this show was three
or some years in existence when I met her, and
she was a surgical tech had she had her own thing,
and at the time when I met her, I very
much like loved that she had her own thing, and
she was passionate about her own thing. And then like,
(44:55):
you know, when we like went public and you know,
she you know, it was like eventually when you're gonna
have a girlfriend on the show, and then you know,
it's like, you know, I took a while. We took
a while, and it happened, and then I was like,
she's funny. You know, she's like she was kind of
a natural. And then it wasn't. I don't remember like
being like a I don't remember like having like a
(45:20):
very specific thought about like or a pitch, but it
kind of happened organically, and I was like, yeah, you know,
like I've always been a male host with an audience
of women. We've always had women voices on this show.
Most of our guests are predominantly women. But I was like, she,
you know, I always felt like she was like I
(45:43):
think I when I as more she came on, I
felt like, you know, you really you're kind of the
missing piece of this show in a sense. And we
started doing the going deeper episodes, and again, I think
I've put a lot of effort as an interviewer and
as a host understanding who my audiences understanding that as
a straight white male, I have to be self aware
(46:09):
about the topics we cover and the questions I ask
and things like that. And I I think I do
a good job of handling those topics and having the
appropriate amount of empathy. But having my wife by my
side as a woman who has her own lived experiences
and in adversity she's had to overcome. Yeah, I mean
(46:33):
it rounds out, you know, some of those conversations in
the best possible way. And again, I think she's hilarious
and she's a lot of fun and and yeah, to me,
I I always say like she's the star of of
of the show. She's the star of our relationship. I
work really hard and I know enough to be dangerous,
(46:53):
but like she is effortless in her talents and she's
she's like she's a great partner both in life and
on the show. Know I mean, there're a Kleenex.
Speaker 2 (47:03):
So that was so kind.
Speaker 3 (47:05):
Oh it's all true.
Speaker 2 (47:06):
Yeah, No, I mean, it's the it's the fact that
you're able to emote in that way because you know,
it's it's it's nice to hear a husband speak of
his wife in that way. So I find that to be.
Speaker 3 (47:24):
I think it's well, thank you, and uh, I think
it's really important. As someone who like talks about relationships,
I think it's really important for couples to protect their
relationship to I mean, I I'll have blown out like now,
and I will be out with other people and couples
where it's like the way they will bicker in front
of us or other people, you know, like I always
(47:49):
you know, we now like that we work hard on
our relationship and like every relationship, you know, like we
work through issues and we work through things. But we
very much when I'm great, like, we protect our relationship,
you know, and so we you know, we do couples therapy,
we work through you know. And so I think it's important,
especially for men to speak kindly publicly about their partners
(48:15):
and advocate for their partners. And again, nothing I'm saying
is nothing I don't believe about my wife. But I
think it's very you know, it's just like you just
see so many couples out there, like you know, you're like,
oh my god, Chad. Yeah, it's just you see it
(48:38):
in some of the BRAVA celebrities where it's just the
way they throw their partners under the bus. It's like,
oh my god, like like you know, it's just like, hey,
you're willing to take the bullet for me today. You know,
it's like, oh my god. You know, but yeah, and
you know, I think you know, and you know, for
(48:59):
all the it's the couples I think in reality TV
who have been able to work. You know, I think
probably the common threat is they've prioritized their relationships over
their brand with their audience and play the long game
and haven't sold anyone out for their own personal benefit.
Speaker 2 (49:22):
No, and I love that. I mean, listen, you two
are now holes of eight Netflix dating series launching in
twenty twenty six, Age of Attraction, which is such a
great vehicle for the two of you because you guys
have an eighteen year age gap. So what better holes
to really showcase that age is nothing but a number
when it comes to fighting love. I want to talk
(49:45):
about before I let you go, just about that show
and how it sort of relates to your relationship because
there was an eighteen year age people thinks like, all,
that's so interesting.
Speaker 3 (49:57):
It's a show that focuses on age less dating, and
I think the word age gap has over the you
know kind of has this like negative connotation. I'm really
excited for people to see it. We've heard you know,
obviously we're there for filming it, but you don't know
what you film and how it gets packaged. We've seen
a little bit of it, and the feedback has been
(50:20):
really exciting, and I think there's a lot of people
involved in this project are very excited for its potential.
But you know, well, I guess we'll see. I think,
more importantly, I think it's meant to be aspirational and
inspirational because we now live in a time where I
think we've never been more lonely, you know, and all
the single people out there, if you're listening, you're all
(50:41):
nodding your heads about how difficult dating is. It is.
Everyone feels like there's no good options out there. Obviously,
dating apps have stopped really being our friends in terms
of actually caring about us matching with people. And and
I think this is a this is a show that's
going to focus on compatibility, uh, and showing that there
(51:04):
are if you are willing to open up your mind, Uh,
there are people you can be incredibly compatible with that
you might not initially think of, you know, off the
bat and then obviously, you know, age plays a role
in that. And so it's a show that's going to
(51:24):
focus on love and and connections and and it's gonna
hopefully inspire people who are struggling finding those connections that
there are people out there. And whether it's age or
we have so many self limiting beliefs when it comes
to dating, or we we decide who our types are,
(51:44):
or we have these superficial lists in our head of
what they need to be. And that's often perpetuated by
like dating apps, right, because like it's like you know six',
two you know, finance you, know things like. That but
it's it's compatible ability THAT i think what's what makes
people really fall in love and stand the test of.
(52:04):
Time you, know my wife AND i we have an
age difference in our, relationship but without, question easily she's
the Person i've been most compatible. With she's the person
that is the first Relationship i've ever had where we didn't.
Compete we actually we were each other's. Cheerleaders we, Love
we spend all our time. Together we like a lot
of the SAME tv shows and. Movies we like a
(52:27):
lot of the same. Foods you, know everything is not
a negotiation with. Us i've been in relationships where you think, like,
well love will conquer all and every day is LIKE
i don't want to eat, that and she's, like why
DON'T i eat? That you, know and you're like every you,
know and like, that that just gets. Exhausting like relationships
are hard, enough and so like finding people that you
(52:48):
are compatible, with that you have the same similar, interests
that you share the same. Things you, know we might
have an age difference in our, relationship BUT i quickly
learned that WHEN i Met, noally she she was excited
about like having a, family and AND i was, like, oh,
well so AM, i you, know and and and that worked,
out you, know and and so you, know she she
(53:12):
had a very different child THAN i, had and but you,
know in a childhood that like she she was doing
a lot of the same things in her late teens
and early twenties THAT i was doing in my you,
know early, thirties you. Know and so at the time
when we, met we were both ready to enter a
stage of life that was. Compatible AND i think it's
this is a show that was going to focus on
(53:34):
looking for the people you're most compatible with and not
getting bogged down by you, know what society might think
or what your friends might. Think but if you truly
can find someone that you enjoy spending time, with that
makes you feel, good, uh and that you you, know
fall in love, with AND i think there's a lot
of hope AND i AND i AND i AND i
(53:55):
think that's What age Of attraction is going to bring.
People so what's next to?
Speaker 2 (53:58):
YOU i feel like you've done a lot Of it's,
like what's next For?
Speaker 3 (54:01):
NICK i just want to enjoy WHAT i? Have you, know,
OBVIOUSLY i MEAN i will always try to grow envy
media in The Viole, files for. SURE i am trying
to enjoy WHAT i. Have objectively, Speaking i've surpassed all
my wildest, dreams both professionally and. Personally we certainly hope
(54:23):
to grow our. Family so a lot of just more
of WHAT i, have but also but also working out
enjoying it because that's A i'm not good at. That. Yeah, Good,
well look where can people feel?
Speaker 2 (54:39):
Like everyone knows where to find? You but where can
people find?
Speaker 1 (54:42):
You support?
Speaker 2 (54:43):
You the podcast?
Speaker 3 (54:44):
YOU i know you have many REALITY tv fans who
passionately listen to your. Show so, yeah if you haven't
if you're not already subscribed to The Vole files or
we haven't checked us, out do. So our reality recaps
are Every tuesday And, thursday and we cover a variety
(55:05):
of REALITY tv shows and have a variety of, guests
both people on REALITY tv and people who love REALITY.
Tv are going deepers every ends every Every wednesday are
more your traditional podcast format where it's a sit down
with a public, figure often a REALITY tv, star and
we dive deep into who they are WHAT i love
most about those and, like as someone who's been on REALITY,
(55:28):
tv we want to humanize our guests in a way
that makes you feel see them beyond the character they
play ON, tv because all REALITY tv stars are siloed
in a way that is limiting to who they really
are as a. Person and then if you're interested in
like relationship discourse and hearing other people's in our personal relationship,
(55:48):
problems whether it's dating or family, problems and and and
we give some feedback that you can either agree with
and find helpful or you can you, know hate watch
and disagree with and play you, Know Armchair. Therapist that's
the show that's Every monday as.
Speaker 2 (56:03):
Well Perfect, well thank You, NICK i appreciate, you, brother
thank you come back on our.
Speaker 3 (56:09):
SHOW i. Will carlos was ON i don't know when
this comes, out but he was on a recent episode
OF Reali recap AND i hope you come back.
Speaker 2 (56:17):
Again oh, Well i'm allowed to just tell meror to
call me And i'm. There thank, you, guys see you
the next.
Speaker 1 (56:23):
One But reality with The king is executive produced by
Me Carlos, king produced By Lizzie, nimitz and a partnership
with The lack Of Effect. Network you can also find
us on my YouTube channel at Be Carlos king on
The score
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