March 11, 2025 • 50 mins
They say it's never good to meet your heroes in real life. It's even worse if you meet your hero in real life and it's not really them. This week, E and Z examine tales of the many folks who want to be the original funkateer, Bootsy Collins. Antics and mayhem ensue. But there is only one true Bootsy!
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Ridiculous Crime is a production of iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Yo, Elizabeth Dutton in here, Saron Burnett's name and joking
around McGee.
Speaker 3 (00:09):
Yeah. Well, I was hanging in here with the new
new intern Rosie.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Oh yeah, oh god, don't don't move quickly in front
of her.
Speaker 3 (00:15):
No kind of she is.
Speaker 4 (00:17):
She's buddy.
Speaker 3 (00:18):
So I'm glad you're here because that'll distract your a
little from my hands. So I got a question for you. Yeah,
do you know what's ridiculous?
Speaker 4 (00:26):
I do? I do.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
I'm kind of covering some road. I've already covered Pokemon, Pokemon.
Speaker 3 (00:32):
Pokemon, Oh yeah, yeah, Pokemon.
Speaker 4 (00:35):
And I've also talked about Cheetos before.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Yes you have, I have two of your great lovestional mashup. Hello,
So there was a Cheeto that looks like Pokemon Charizard
and yeah, and yeah it looks like Charizard, which I
suppose it does.
Speaker 4 (00:56):
It's one of those.
Speaker 3 (00:57):
Flaming hot ones flaming hot jar.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
So I guess everyone was like, oh my god, this
looks like good Pokemon.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
And then this first in Goal Collectibles got a hold
of it sometime between twenty eighteen and twenty twenty two.
They're being cagy about it. And they they fixed it
to a customized Pokemon card encapsulated in a clear card
storage box.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
Oh those are the best kind.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Yeah, and then it you know, it surged in popularity
on social media platforms in late twenty twenty four. According
to somebody, oh the auction site anyway, it went up
for auction.
Speaker 4 (01:32):
It just sold. The bidder bid seventy two thousand dollars.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
That's a lot of money.
Speaker 4 (01:37):
It wasn't And then with the buyer's.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
Premium it goes up to eighty seven and forty dollars
for a Pokemon Cheeto Cheeto card in a nice collectible case. Yeah,
and that one, I think it came from maybe a
couple of people, But the one that was forwarded to
me was from Monica on Instagram.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
So thank you Monica.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
Thanks Monica. Well that's a good one. I'll give you
that and Monica. But you know what else is ridiculous?
I got something for you.
Speaker 4 (02:03):
Please please tell me when you.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
Look like someone famous? Yeah, why not have fun with it?
Speaker 4 (02:07):
Right?
Speaker 3 (02:08):
It's all fun and games, well right up until you
decide to get criminally ridiculous.
Speaker 5 (02:12):
Sure is ziggy.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
This is Ridiculous Crime a podcast about absurd and outrageous capers, heists,
and cons. It's always ninety nine percent murder free and
one hundred percent ridiculous. Yeah, I know you feel me
on that, Elizabeth. You also love a good story like
me about criminal celebrity lookalikes.
Speaker 4 (02:56):
Correct, Oh, completely.
Speaker 3 (02:57):
Right, they're always fun. Well, boys, howdy do I have
some fun ones for you today?
Speaker 4 (03:02):
Thank you?
Speaker 3 (03:02):
Well, really, it's anyway you'll see. It's it's a bunch
of them. But they're all kind of it's simple. They're
related to well, I don't want to ruin it. First up,
I want to tell you about a woman who was
hired to perform in Sorry noam Okay, that's fun. That's
not common. That's like worth taking a trip right now.
The woman's name is Trina Johnson Finn, and the story goes.
Trina was a career backup singer, the kind you find
(03:24):
in Las Vegas, right, that's where she was working in
before her adventure in Surry nom Now. Over the years,
she'd performed like with Barbara streisand as a backup singer.
She toured with EMPs Hammer for five years.
Speaker 4 (03:36):
Like a singer and a dancer, more.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
Of a backup singer. Okay, now, She had her own
one woman's show that ran through a cavalcade of song. Right,
it's a musical history of Las Vegas. It was like
a tour of the American songbook. She sings songs by
Gladys Knight and the Pips. He'd cover songs by Tina Turner.
She had range, right, and apparently she sang a wicked
proud Mary. Now this is why she gets hired to
(03:59):
go down to that little country there just north of Brazil.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
Now, Trina was booked by an outfit called Events for Surreyname,
and it was run by this shady promoter named Angel
Ventura or on hell Ventura, which totally sounds like a
made up name, right, it sounds like the kind of
name you would expect for like, I don't know, professional wrestler.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
All yes, totally Anyway, this cat Ventura.
Speaker 3 (04:23):
He books Trina as the singer for a Tony Braxton
tribute show. So she flies down for that, except he
told the crowd it would really be Tony Braxton. Yeah,
so Tina didn't know the real score, or so she claims. Now,
she flew down to surreynam When she got there, ready
to perform, she learns that the audience is expecting Tony Braxton.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
Oh no, break their hearts, Sarah, exactly.
Speaker 3 (04:46):
You feel me now, This poor woman, she's got a
moment to decide. She's all made up, right, What will
she do? Would she go out on stage and pretend
to be Tony Braxton? Or would she keep her integrity
tell the promoter to go get bent and fly back
home to the US. I think you know what choice
she d Trina decided to go out on stage. This
crowd in Surryna was expecting Tony Braxton. Damn it. She
(05:06):
was gonna give them Tony Braxton. Problem was they knew
Tony Braxton because they were fans of Tony Braxton. So
she goes out there, she takes the stage, she performs
her set right, her first song is apparently solid, but
something just ain't right.
Speaker 4 (05:20):
Well, I'm guessing it's not a huge venue.
Speaker 3 (05:22):
Well it's a stadium, but it is. Yeah, it's not
like a tiny club. It's like a stadium. So there's
a little distance between her and the crowd. Yeah, she
can kind of pull it off. But like Tony Braxton,
I don't know if she's known for her dance moves.
It's mostly her voice and her persona.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
And the balaklava I would hope with hope.
Speaker 3 (05:38):
Right. So she's out there and she can see the
crowd's faces and they do not look like they're into
this show. Some look confused, others look upset, some are
just mad. No one's smiling though, right, So Trina tries
to shake it off. Maybe her second song will win
them over. So this is when the booze now start
to rain down on her. Folks. In the first few rows,
(06:00):
they're shooting daggers with their eyes at her. Trina, though,
keeps singing she's committed, you know, she's the show's got
to go on, and she's on now the show, So
trying like hell, she tries to win over the crowd.
Then she gets hit with a glass of beer. Oh no,
it's a plastic Yeah, luckily it's a plastic cup, splashes
its contents all over her. That's bad. It's also very
fun for the crowd. So now a glass bottle comes up.
(06:23):
Oh that's bad. That's yeah, that's worse. Then another plastic glass,
and then another bottle and another. The crowd is fully
turned on her, right, so the Trina waves for the
DJ cut the music. Cut the music, right, he does.
She turns to the crowd and tells them we're gonna
stop the show now, which they did that exactly that,
and Trina cuts out. Not only does she leave the stage,
she leaves the venue.
Speaker 4 (06:44):
Just who made a promise?
Speaker 3 (06:46):
Exactly Also I forgot to mention, but once she was backstage,
she looked for the promoter on Hell Ventura, and ode
On Hell had disappeared. He was gone, right, he got
the money from the gate and was whooped gone. The
next day, Trina and her husband they get confronted by
the local police. They're like, you know, this was straight
up fraud. You got to give these people their money back.
They're like, we don't have the money. They get arrested,
(07:08):
taken to the police station, interrogated. The day after that,
oh wow, it was definitely. This is like in the
early two thousand, so it was like an expensive ticket.
Then the day after they get initially interrogated, they're feeling
like they're pressing their luck hanging out in Surinam. Once again,
(07:29):
they do not have the money to make this right. America,
Las Vegas is essentially right, So yeah, that's in America.
They trying to make a break for it. They flee
to the airport. In this desperate attempt to escape Surinam
right her and her husband, the couple, they reached the
airport and that's where they're confronted by police. Yet again,
they're detained at the airport. They don't make it out.
(07:51):
The promoter Ventura, though he's pulled a full Harry Houdini.
Cops can't find him. He's gone. He did not go
to the airport, he went some other way.
Speaker 4 (07:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (07:58):
So the police though, since they have training, and they're like, well,
it's just throw the law look at her, and so
they do that. Now Trina's on the hook for all
the sins of on hell. Ventura. Her husband also though,
because I don't know, he's just her husband, he gets arrested,
also detained for two weeks. He's locked up. Finally, after
two weeks are like, we have nothing on this guy.
So they send him back to America. But meanwhile, in
that two weeks time, he lost his job because he
(08:21):
was a realtor and his employer was like, man, we
don't need a realtor who's like cooling his heels into
jail and Surinam. Yeah, so he gets back and then
what's he has to do now is get his wife
freaked because she's still detained and the authorities have no
immediate plans to let her go because they do have
charges on her. So her husband flies back to America
without her. Once he's home, he begins selling the couple's
(08:42):
few assets to raise money to fight her case.
Speaker 4 (08:45):
Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
Now, so, Elizabeth, I don't know if you've ever spent
time in jail, or specifically jail and surinam, but I
know you don't. I didn't want to put you on
the spot an embarrassing front of producer Dan. But let
me tell you it's no country sleigh ride right Anyway,
Trina caught all kinds of hell when she was locked
up or calling her time behind bars. I found a
quote from Trina she explained how a quote, it was
(09:07):
like being locked up in a very poor country like Jamaica.
If you can imagine that, it was very nasty, run down.
The toilet was not working, so it's said, yeah, so
instead of her proper john, though, Trina was forced to
use a small metal bucket as her toilet. A bucket, Elizabeth, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (09:26):
That's what I have?
Speaker 3 (09:27):
Really? Is that what that is in your car. Well, see,
I always wonder where do you empty the bucket? Do
you throw it out the cell window like you live
in a medieval castle, or did this someone come around
with like a honeywagon. You go like empty it twice
like a day, Like how does that work with the bit.
Speaker 4 (09:39):
In the corner of a Walmart parking lot?
Speaker 3 (09:41):
Not your bucket, fair bucket, their bucket.
Speaker 4 (09:44):
I don't know. I'm gonna guess they throw it out
the window.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
Okay, the prison or the jail. Well, anyway, back to Trina,
enough bucket. She also remembered how bleak the living conditions
were in her cell, and she wanted to talk about that,
so she focused on the shower. She was very liquid focused,
so she Trina said, the rooms were just nasty. I
had an old bed that was extremely hard. You showered
by catching water coming out of the faucet in a
bucket and washing down that way.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Their buckets buckets, and the buckets are multipleower your bucket.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
They're like, oh man, yeah, my shower.
Speaker 4 (10:19):
But I wonder what was the lighting like? Was that
tough to imagine?
Speaker 3 (10:22):
It was diom So Trina's time in jail seems like
a rather excessive punishment for pretending to be Tony Braxton.
But despite what she had, she had to suffer for
putting on this fake show. Trina tries to survive her
new life after lock up. Now after she and her husband,
they keep trying to fight her case, right, so he
pays for lawyers. She gets herself some local lawyers. She
(10:42):
is also hoping her story of wrongful incarceration might go
viral and help her to get free. That did not happen, Elizabeth.
So she's down.
Speaker 4 (10:50):
There because something went wrong there.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
You go, well, worse than that for her, since you know,
she's not getting viral fame for her suffering, and and
they started on. No one seems to care about the
fate of this phony Tony Braxton forre and a half
months behind bars. Finally, Trina's case goes to trial in
May of two thousand and nine. That's when a miracle occurs.
(11:13):
A miracle. Elizabeth, the ever mysterious long presumed disappeared promoter
on Hell Ventura reappears on the scene. Oh really, yeah,
better than that. He shows up in court. Trina tells it. Quote,
they said they found him, but I think he just
turned himself in and had probably paid a lot of
people off to avoid taking responsibility for this. Well, so
when paying people off failed, he finally agreed to face
(11:36):
the music. So back to Trina quote, I don't think
there's any big man hunt for him, but the prestice
was generating internationally forced them to take a look at
the real evidence. And we had a contract specifically stating
that I was a tribute act. He basically got called
out and had to turn himself in.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
So where was this contract? Couldes she show the police?
Speaker 3 (11:56):
Apparently I don't ask. I guess maybe he still hasn't
his BF case and she's like, look at his briethdays
find the contract. I do not know the details were
scarce got it? Got it? So once they do have
this slippery promoter on the witness stand, as I am
imagining it, he confesses to his part in the fake
Tony Braxton scam concert, gets convicted, sentenced to two and
a half years in prison. Wowrin sur on prison with the.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Buckets of bucket.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
I hope you like buckets, buddy, so is Trina. She
gets sent home to America, where she returns to Vegas
and her one woman tour of the American songbook, So
they're happy ending for her, right, Yeah, Trina, Now I've
got a much bigger surprise for you, and this one
that was about to tell you. It's a series of stories,
but they all involve a very famous man who is
Snoop Dogg's uncle.
Speaker 4 (12:40):
Is Snoop Dogg's uncle is famous?
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Yeah, let's take a little break and after these beautiful,
beautiful lads we will be back. I'll tell you about
this famous man who is Snoop Dogg's uncle.
Speaker 6 (12:51):
All right, Elizabeth Zaren do you figure out who Snoop
(13:14):
Dogg's famous uncle was?
Speaker 3 (13:15):
No, you really don't know? You have any guesses? U? No, Well,
the stories will be about folks who pretend to be
Snoop's famous uncle, not actually about Snoop's famous uncle.
Speaker 2 (13:25):
That was it his uncle on his mother's side or
his father's side.
Speaker 3 (13:29):
I didn't examine his last name, Brotus. I didn't examine
the actual genealogy. They just both claim each other as
nephew and uncle.
Speaker 4 (13:37):
Oh was it like play uncle?
Speaker 2 (13:38):
No?
Speaker 3 (13:38):
I think I think it's real. I don't think it's play.
I think it's real. I'll give you a hint. His
name rhymes with cutesy rawlins. What, Yes, Bootsy as in
Collins Uncle, the Calvin brotus aka Snoop Dogg.
Speaker 4 (13:53):
How in the what I know?
Speaker 7 (13:55):
Right?
Speaker 3 (13:55):
Yeah? Everything I found that I could find online. It
could not find like their sestry dot com, but I.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Found I don't know what you're going to talk about
ahead of time. I will go on to ancestry dot
com after this.
Speaker 3 (14:08):
Yeah you should. Yeah, I don't even have it like
a log in. So bootsy seks to be the word
bootsy is slang that you use all the time. What
does bootsy mean to you?
Speaker 2 (14:16):
To me? When I say something is bootsy, it's you know,
it's a less than high quality.
Speaker 4 (14:22):
It's it's kind of janky.
Speaker 3 (14:24):
Okay, another one, all right, so that's a synonym for bootsy.
Speaker 4 (14:27):
Think you know, uh poor quality? Gross?
Speaker 3 (14:31):
Okay, now we got a definition. Yes, I guess all right,
Well I feel I feel like whenever you say it,
I totally get what you mean. But then also I
obviously think of Bootsy when I hear it, I think
of Bootsy Collins. So when I say bootsy as in
Bootsy Collins, what do you picture? What do you imagine?
Speaker 2 (14:45):
I imagine huge platform boots, and like star shaped sunglasses. Yes, Bootsy.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
How about his star based that he nicknamed space.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Bas Yes, space based?
Speaker 3 (14:57):
Well a little just about Bootsy. He was born William
Earl aka Bootsy Collins. He was born nineteen fifty one.
His mama nicknamed him Bootsy. He once asked her, like,
why did you name your baby boy Bootsy?
Speaker 2 (15:11):
Right?
Speaker 3 (15:11):
Because I imagine like you was. It doesn't sound like
it's exactly a compliment. His mama told him, and I
quote because you looked like a Bootsy And he said,
I left it at that, you know, mama said, So
Bootsy's Collins. He's He first came to prominence in James
Brown's band, the JBS. Right now. He played on a
raft of James Brown's legendary songs. Hey, I'll tell you
a couple of them. Get up. I feel like being
(15:33):
a sex machine. He was on super Bad, He's on
Soul Power. So like right when James is getting funky,
he's there. He's the one who introduces or helps introduce
the funk. He gave those tracks. That's super funky. So
him and his brother Catfish Collins low End. Yeah, Now,
as you might imagine, working for James Brown was no
picnic in the park. Her stories, I imagine right now
(15:55):
it is. Bootsy remembered it in one colorful story about
his time with the Godfather's Soul. He said, and I quote,
he treated me like a son, and being out of
a father this home, I needed that father figure and
he really played up to it. I mean, good lord.
Every night after we played a show, he called us
back to give us a lecture about how horrible we sounded.
(16:15):
Not on that son. I didn't hear that one. You
didn't give me the one. He would tell me this
after every show. One night we knew we wasn't sounding
really good. We were off, and he called us back
there and he said, oh, now that's what I'm talking about.
Y'all was on it tonight. You hit the one. My
brother and I looked at each other like this mother
has got to be crazy. We knew in all heart
(16:36):
and soul that we wasn't all on that show. So
then I started figuring out his game. Man by telling
me that I wasn't on it, he made me practice
hort up. So I just absorbed what he said and
used it in a positive way. So that was about
how he did it.
Speaker 4 (16:52):
I like that I didn't.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
I needed a father figure, someone who would criticized him needless.
Speaker 3 (16:57):
A real tough, hard hand is what I'm looking for.
James Brown, like I keep my hands strong. So he
got this tiny tyrant James Brown, right, who's just like
a bound muscle of aggression on stage and off right.
So in the meantime, Bootsy, he's trying to handle the
stress of dealing with his boss and now he's like,
you know, newfound and growing fame as a musician, so
he chooses to self medicate. His medicine of choice was LSD. Oh,
(17:22):
that's an interesting as Bootsy tells it, LSD was a
big part of why I left James Brown's band. I
promise myself I'd never do it during a show, but
we had a father son relationship, and he pestered me
so much not to do it that one day I
just did. My base turned into a snake and I
can't even remember playing. After he called me in the
(17:43):
back room as he always did and was explaining how
terrible I was, even when I wasn't taking LSD. I
laughed so hard I was on the floor. To him,
that was very disrespectful. He had his body God throw
me out. So he's high in LSD and he gets
thrown out of James.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
Brown's the tech bro micro dos.
Speaker 3 (18:05):
No, he's doing MAXI dosing MAXI do. Yeah, He's like,
how many he did? He says he did elist every
day for two years.
Speaker 4 (18:12):
What, yes, Bootsy, I don't think that's healthy.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
No, but it helped him decide it was time to
move on from James Brown. Okay, Boots it is. It
helped him to see things in a new way, give
him new perspectives and insights. He stayed with James bound
for about a year, but I think it's like eleven months. No,
he and his brother, Catfish Collins, they split from the band.
What a great pair of names, right, these are my sons,
Bootsy and Catfish. So next up the brothers Bootsy and Catfish.
(18:38):
They joined George Clinton's band, Parliament Funkade. Now that's where
Bootsy becomes a superstar, right, that's where we think of
him with the star shaped sunglasses, the yeah, you know,
the platform heals. So George Clinton, obviously he appreciates all
the way out there antics in the funky bass of
Bootsy Collins. So Bootsy stayed with George Clinton in Parliament
(18:59):
Forkadelic for the rest of the seventies and into the eighties,
and together they make the funkiness into a cultural revolution.
So over the years, Bootsy tries on many many personas,
like there's boots Zilla, right aka quote the world's only
Ryan Stone rockstar, mon still of a doll. So because
of course, you know, Bootsy would see himself as an
(19:20):
alien rock star. Sure has come to Earth to spread
the gospel of funk. It's all that makes sense, right,
I mean, it's right there, Elizabeth. So over the years,
obviously there are other personas. One that was all mentioned
was Casper the Funky Ghost. Okay, that's me, Yeah, Bootsy Collins.
He's always on. He was one of a kind basically, right,
which makes it super wild that there were a bunch
of people who tried to impersonate him, like a bunch Yeah,
(19:42):
they called him almost Bootsies like. Some did it well
and some were surprisingly successful, others not so much. So
it started off when Bootsy heard about this one cat
out there who kind of looked like him, and he
was charging money to sign autographs at events. Like he
would go to some small city and he'd find a
nightclub or a Ants Club and he posts up there.
Then he'd start to like greet his fans and he'd
(20:03):
shake some hands and if anyone wanted an autograph, he's like, oh,
that'd be five dollars or whatever.
Speaker 4 (20:08):
Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (20:09):
So his manager, Bootsy Collins manager Archie Ivy recalled quote
there were Bootsy sightings all over the place where Bootsy
wasn't So now what was Bootsy's initial response, Well, according
to Ivy, we just shrugged it off and said, boots
he's a real star. Now, we didn't take things seriously.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Well, that is a good point. That shows what a
star you are.
Speaker 3 (20:30):
That totally people want to be you.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
Well, and I think because he doesn't like if you
asked me to pick his just plane face with no
hair out of a lineup.
Speaker 4 (20:41):
I couldn't do it.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Be very difficult. He usually's wearing a sequin top hat. Yes,
star shaped sunglasses. You just see a bit of a
slender black face.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
Yes, So if you have the same build, then yeah,
you just put the accessories on and yeah, speaking come Bootsy.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
George Clinton tried it on for a weekend.
Speaker 4 (20:56):
It's maybe it's like santy Claus.
Speaker 3 (20:59):
Kind of Bootsy clubs George. As I was saying, George Clinton,
his bandmate been Parliament falcadelic. He found it all hilarious
that people wanted to be Bootsy, so you know he
would he said, and I quote, I thought it was
funny that someone got away with it that far, right, now,
George Clinton, he also tried to, as I said, be
boot become Bootsy, and to see what he could get
away with. So, as he remembered it, one time he
(21:20):
was backstage and he tried to make some young woman
laugh and he put on the Bootsy costume. And George
Clinton tells the story and I quote, somebody came to
see Bootsy and they had never seen him up close.
And I put on the star glasses and said yeah, Bubba,
which was one of the trademark catchphrases of his persona
boot Zilla. So I was with the girl for two
or three days before Bootsy showed up. I told Bootsy
(21:42):
I was him. So he says right to boss face, and.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
He's just like, oh wow, okay, No, of.
Speaker 3 (21:49):
Course everybody in the story is kite high.
Speaker 4 (21:52):
Well, it's like.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
When I was little and growing up, we'd be driving
and if we saw a car exactly like ours, same
make model color. My mother would say to us, Oh,
maybe that's us and we just don't know it, And
that just messed with my.
Speaker 3 (22:05):
Head so badly sent your little head slide right.
Speaker 4 (22:07):
Yeah, I'd be like, oh what if it is?
Speaker 3 (22:09):
Yeah, parallel universe right there. I hope we make it.
Speaker 4 (22:13):
You know, she got there.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
Now speaking about there. But my man Bootsy, as you
point out right, he was a bit easier to imitate
because his look is so iconic and so people it's
largely a costume. People just need the star shape, sunglasses
and uh. As his manager Ivy points out, it wasn't
like impersonating prints where he had to worry about height.
With Bootsy, you make yourself tall with platform boots, put
(22:37):
on a top hat and the star glasses and a
lot of shiny stuff. Bootsie's voice is basically a cartoon character,
so if you had the right phrase and attitude, I
can see it being pulled off.
Speaker 4 (22:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
So, now if you ask Bootsy what he thought about
all this sudden wave of imitators, he'd tell you, as
he once told Rolling Stone, and I quote, at first,
I thought it was funny until some close friends started
to tell me about how the almost Bootsy started to
rip people off because he's very positive. It's fun when
people are having fun. But now they're out there trying
to like scam in his name. He's like, that ain't
(23:10):
right now, that ain't Bootsy. So Bootsy did he get
to have some fun with it? Right? He even offered
his fans their very own Bootsy costume, like his nineteen
seventy eight album he had was called Bootsy Player of
the Year right. That album included a pair of fake
star cut cardboard sunglasses. A fan could cut them out
and become Bootsy. So this obviously led to Bootsy saying
(23:32):
at the time, it seems that in the past year
there's been a lot of fake teers running around almost
Bootsies who's been trying to.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Be me.
Speaker 3 (23:42):
Bakaders. Yeah, because obviously the funketeers is to play on.
So Bootsy Uh. The very next year, for his next album,
This boot is Made for Funking', he had a song
called she Jam parenthetical almost Bootsy show. So he addressed
it directly and in the lyrics Bootsy sang and I
(24:02):
quote without singing, said everyone they were almost Bootsy decked
out in the staw shaped shades, little boys and girls.
They were almost Bootsy shining all over the place. So
there you go. That was some cute fun for Boots.
Speaker 4 (24:17):
That's great.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
So anyway, one of the almost Bootsies that we've been
you know, teasing out, they walked into the headquarters of
Warner Brothers Records in Burbank. The almost Bootsy he told
someone in Warner Brothers office, I'm Bootsy and then said
I'm luck my next royalty check.
Speaker 2 (24:33):
Oh, like it didn't get delivered to the house.
Speaker 4 (24:36):
I guess can I just can I cancel that one?
Just issue me a new one.
Speaker 3 (24:39):
I was traveling, I thought I just come right to
the office.
Speaker 4 (24:42):
To make it easier on you.
Speaker 3 (24:43):
So the folks at Warner Brothers, they were used to
odd behavior from Bootsy, right, Oh yeah, but this was unprofessional, right,
and a little more than sus So the folks at
Warner Brothers they call Bootsi's manager, Archie Ivy, and the
manager when he hears that Bootsy is in a Burbank
in the Warner Brothers office asking them run me my check.
He thought it was because Bootsy knew his royalty checks
were distributed by his company and not by Warner rog
(25:07):
so yeah, the manager recalled that he'd just spoken with
the funketeer himself just two days prior in the Cincinnati area.
Then the reason why this matters, Elizabeth is that Bootsy
was afraid of flying. He would avoided at all costs. Yeah,
so he would have driven across country from Ohio to California,
and that most likely would have taken longer than two days.
Speaker 4 (25:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (25:27):
So Ivy the manager, he had the execs Warner Brothers
stall this almost Bootsy who was asking for the royalty
check that the execs from the label. They did as requested.
They stall him, but they left him alone. Right, So
then they go they go back to the call. Okay,
we stalled him, and then they go back to him
and they're like, wait, where'd he go? Yeah, he took
off gone almost Bootsy, he bootsied out the door. But
(25:48):
he was not the last almost Bootsy because there were
actually there were quite a few. As George Clinton recalled,
there was this funny thing was how when he wasn't
on stage, Bootsy was not so outsized. You know a
lot of performers, but people always imagined he was Bootsy
twenty four to seven. So Bootsy was actually rather shy.
So it was kind of the tell if you knew
boots he was if he's being outsized when he's not
(26:11):
in a stage setting, it's not Bootsy.
Speaker 2 (26:14):
That's like me, you know. It's like, I'm so hyper
infrenetic on this show.
Speaker 3 (26:18):
So exactly the place I'm like, Elizabeth climbed down from
the walls.
Speaker 4 (26:21):
Right, and so we're scaring in the in the world.
Speaker 3 (26:25):
May meet you, and you're just a very calm today.
Kashmir sweater.
Speaker 4 (26:28):
You wouldn't believe it.
Speaker 3 (26:30):
Yeah, wearing track pants exactly. George Clinton framed it. Bootsy
was shy. He couldn't have been to all those parties,
but people wanted to see Bootsy and be with them.
I went to a few places and people would say,
I just saw Bootsy. They might have been a couple
of them. So they're just Bootsies popping up everywhere. Yeah,
I just showed up with the glasses, the hat. I'm Bootsy.
(26:50):
So just imagine a world with a multiplicity of Bootsies, right,
would that be good? And that's like we need one? Yeah,
that'd be kind of insane. But rather than picture that, Elizabeth,
I thought I'd take you up run and personal to
your very own almost bootsy sighting. Yes, Elizabeth, I'd like
you to close your eyes. I'd like you to picture it. Elizabeth.
It's the early nineteen eighties and you were seated at
(27:11):
a corner table in a nightclub in Washington, DC. The
crowd is a mix of the hip and the hangers on.
All around you, you can hear men and women's laughter,
low conversations, glasses, plank lighters, spark to life, to burn,
the business end of a cigarette. At the moment you're
seated at the corner table, the coolest people in the room.
Most of the folks with you are musicians just like you.
(27:34):
You're the drummer in a local funk band, and at
the moment you and the rest of your band are
absolutely giddy because seated with you is the one and
only Bootsy Collins, the master of the space bass himself.
He's wearing his signature star shaped sunglasses, his sequin top hat,
and at the moment he's telling you stories about hanging
out with the famous folks whose names you know. In
(27:54):
the music you revere, He's mentioned playing gigs with James
Brown and the JB. He talks about his time with
the Atomic dog George Clinton playing in jams with Sly
but without the family stone. The weird part, though, is
how Boots he keeps bad mouth and everyone he's ever
played with or worked for. At the moment, Bootsy is drunk,
(28:15):
loud talking. Bits of spittle hit your face as he
tells you how James never understood that Boots he ain't
from planet Earth. Boots is from planet for Gozella, the
known home planet of the one and only boots Zella.
You dig babies now, ignoring the bits of liquor up
the spittle as he talks, It's fun to take a
trip down memory lane with Bootsy. Here's someone who seems
(28:37):
to note just about everyone in music. However, it's still
a bummer how he has almost nothing good to say
about any of them. His mood switches on a dome
with a great flourish Bootsy holds up a credit card
and waves it around like a composer's baton Boots, he
says loud enough for all the nightclub waiters to hear,
We're gonna have fun with this plastic Yeah, now, indeed
(28:59):
you all do. Another round of drinks is ordered, more
food is ordered. When the flaming drinks arrive at the table.
You blow out yours and take the first sip. You
think to yourself, it sure feels good to party with
music Royalty. There's a band getting set up on stage
in this little nightclub. Someone in your party spots this development.
It says to Bootsy, you should get up and grab
(29:20):
a base and funk this place up. Bootsy laughs at
the idea, ha ha, like it's a big joke, but
you won't let the idea go. You keep nudging Bootsy
to take the stage into unleash the Bootzilla on this crowd.
Boots he just keeps laughing.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
Ah.
Speaker 3 (29:36):
But it's like it's the funniest idea is ever heard.
But it's not that funny anyway. Bootsy turns to you
and asks, how are you fixed with cash? Now? He
says he happens to be caught riding low on the greenbacks.
He says he just has his credit cards on him,
but he needs some walking around money for Bootsy. Now,
could you loan boots Is some bucks? The question throws you,
and you hear yourself say, without thinking, what about your royalties?
(29:59):
Can't you just like ask for a line of credit
at a bank against them? Boots He laughs off the idea,
ha ha ha, same as when it was suggested that
he should play the bass on stage. Boutsi just says,
does anyone else in your band have any cash? A
little something to help out Bootsy? Now you're getting annoyed.
Why is this rich rock star trying to pull dollars
out of your band's gas money? So you say to Bootsy,
(30:21):
aren't you loaded? You're Bootsy? That elicits another big Bootsy laugh.
Bosieck loves that. Now the master of the space base says,
if that's right, baby Rom Bootsie Tom next up Planet
funk Azilla. He excuses himself to go to the bathroom.
The band is nearly set up. Now you wonder what
(30:41):
Bootsy will think of them. But you never find out
because boots He never comes back to the table. In fact,
you never see him again. And it turns out, even
though he waved his card around, he never actually paid
for all the drinks and the food that he ordered
for the table, which means you and the band have
to pick up the tab for Bootsy. So much for
the band's gas money. Oh man, So, as you might guess,
(31:04):
that was not the real Bootsy Collins. Did you party
with in DC, Elizabeth? You spent the night with a
high dollar almost Bootsy. Did you have fun? Right? There
was a lot of fun though. Yeah. Sure, Okay, let's
take a little break and after these messages we'll be
back with more fake bootsies, Elizabeth. As we've covered Bootsy,
(31:43):
my man Bootsy, Your man Bootsy a bit outsized, also
a bit shy. You enjoying the stories of I am
the dichotomy of the Funkozoa. Now, when Bootsy obviously was
off stage and feeling shy, he was still Bootsy that interestingly,
though he would be dressed as the space alien funketeer,
he would just tone down his behavior and use his
(32:04):
normal talking voice. He'd be at home wearing his star
sunglasses and some outrageous shiny outfit. His booking agent actually remember,
and I found this quote from him. He said, I
never saw him running around in Bermuda shorts and a
tank top. He was always Bootsy, So you know, bermudas
and a tank I don't know what's why he goes
with right, it's very early eighties, I guess you know,
(32:25):
you can make sure a lot.
Speaker 2 (32:26):
Of people, well, you can either dress like that or
you can dress like Bootsy. Those your only choice.
Speaker 3 (32:30):
In nineteen eighty two, that was the choice, that was
the law. So as you can probably hear, it's not
easy to become such a character and not lose kind
of like a sight of yourself or part of your humanity.
And the even more extreme cases, which is what Bootsy
was worried about, was happening to him. Yeah, Plus he's
taking acid every day for two years. So eventually, by
the early eighties, after a decade at the Heights of Funk,
Bootsy decided he was over it. Right as he told
(32:52):
Rolling Stone, and I quote, I got so tired of
living up to the Bootsy character. I'd become a so
called star. I just didn't know how to handle it.
So it was a real crisis for the residents Space
Alien And as he later told The Guardian, and I quote,
I got worn out from being Bootsy going into the eighties,
I was trying to get away from him. He was
hitting up the festivals, the stadiums, headlining for one hundred
(33:14):
thousand people. He was like a monster. The business side
got really big and ugly because I didn't know what
I was doing. I was just there to play music
and the next thing I knew everything had turned around.
Now this leads to a crisis for Boozy. Right at
this point, he's still gobbling acid like you know, like
it's Flintstone vitamins. So this is becoming a problem for him.
(33:35):
Eventually he has a bad motorcycle accident. Now he may
or may not have been asked on acid at the time.
I could not get that straight. But could you imagine
crashing on a motorcycle on LSD?
Speaker 4 (33:44):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (33:45):
God, right, are you just tripping and all of a sudden,
like I just can't imagine. I was thinking about that. Yeah,
And it slows down fat and then you just like
then you feel your skin grab against the pavement and
then it's like, oh my skin, where did it go?
So the shame of all this is that while others
were out having fun being almost to Bootsies, the real
deal is stuck being Bootsy and he felt like it
was a private hell to be Bootsy, And unlike the
(34:07):
almost Bootsies, he can't take off his costume and stop
being Bootsy because it's now a part of him, right,
all right, So, but he did step back from the
character he creates nineteen eighty two, he leaves the party
life behind. He settles down on the twenty three acre
ranch back in Ohio near Cincinnati. Yeah, his mama told
him to take off his top hat and his star
sunglasses and just be her boy Bootsy again, be himself, right,
(34:29):
you beaus up, baby boy. Now. Two years later, nineteen
eighty four, he decided he should probably also stop doing drugs.
Probably not just the ranch.
Speaker 4 (34:37):
Advisable when you're on the ranch, the drug.
Speaker 3 (34:40):
Yeah, that's basically what he came to, he said, and
I quote, I throwed all my drugs away and I
stopped taking them. That's when it started to become clear
what I needed to get back to, which was the music.
So what meant for him keeping the costume off was
that Bootsy was seeing walking around his home in the
bermuda shorts and the tank tops. Eventually worrying what people
(35:00):
might call normal clothes, right, so he puts the star
sunglasses of the rhinestone top hats in a spare room.
But not only that, he locked the door. Oh really,
he shuts his past self away behind a padlock. Meanwhile,
the almost Bootsies don't know this, so they're still going
around the world being full tailed Bootsies, still claiming to
be him and one of his new musical collaborators around
this time, he recalled his early eighties phase Bootsies, and
(35:23):
he described all these almost Bootsies, and he recalled what
Bootsy told him. And this is a quote of Bootsy
from somebody else. Okay, so yeah, those mothers tried to
impersonate me, but they didn't get too far with it.
He would laugh about things like that. He was telling
everyone to be Bootsy, but so when somebody did it,
he didn't really bother him much. Yeah, but the strangeness
of the almost Bootsies persisted. Right now, we're into the eighties,
(35:46):
go go, let me see what I can get away with.
Sure it starts getting to leaving the uglier right. So,
one of the almost Bootsies, well, this is probably one
of the last silly moments. He dropped off some laundry,
said he claimed to be Bootsie Collins. I guess he
just wanted laundry. Yeah, he wanted Bootsy to pay for
his dry cleaning. I guess, like I think he thought
maybe Bootsy had like an account there. Maybe he saw
Bootsy go there and he's like, let me just drop
(36:07):
off my drag.
Speaker 4 (36:08):
Cleaning, the getting like a sparkly pants drike clean.
Speaker 3 (36:12):
Yeah, I do not know, but it was. It was
one of the stories mentioned that I thought was interesting.
Another one that was a kind of ticklish was they
had a fax machine in their home in Cincinnati because
it's nineteen eighties, and so someone faxes them and wanted
to perform a Bootsy check. It was someone in La
telling people that there was Bootsy Collins, right, So someone
faxed over to the house his Bootsy home, right, And
(36:33):
so the almost Bootsy had checked into some luxury hotel
like I'm imagining, like on Wilshare Boulevard, right, and they
were demanding a free room and free room service. And
his wife, who receives this fact, right, she calls back
to La and it's like, no, he's here at home.
He is not there, right.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
So meanwhile, when he doesn't sound like the type who's like,
give me a free room exactly.
Speaker 3 (36:52):
But people don't know, like the person who's working the
front desk, the this is this is star behavior. They're
all like this or whatever, and they move along and
they approve it. So the the guy gets away with it.
The almost Bootsy gets a free night, a hot meal
and everything else. And his wife not as amused as
Bootsy would have abused. She was super annoyed by this
right because now they're starting to make it's a bad name,
it's a bad look. The press may get confused. So
(37:13):
another call comes to the house, this time from Vegas.
There were reports of yet another almost Bootsy. His wife
super annoyed with this one because the Vegas Casino hotel
had complied and given Bootsy the free room the room service.
Once again bad behavior on his parts. And now she's like,
that's not Bootsy, it's the impersonator. She's like yelling at people.
She wants there to be like a Bootsy block. So
(37:35):
my favorite almost Bootsy was in nineteen eighty eight. They
went to the New York Music Awards. He went as Bootsy.
He proceeded to hang out with other celebs, music stars,
gets in, He parties with Lou Reed, he laughed with
Paul Simon, he posed with ll Coolja. Yes, there was
another enclosed encounter with this same almost Bootsy in a
hotel in Manhattan. A bass player who knew Bootsy heard
(37:57):
his friend was in the hotel. So he comes over
to the law and he's like, and he sees Bootsy
because you're gonna see Bootsy and Apel lobby, right, So
he goes over to him and he's like, and I quote,
I knew what Bootsy looked like. I see it all
the interviews and had the poaches on my wall as
a kid. He's staying in the same hotel as Miles.
I was like, God, damn it, it's him. It's got
to be him. So he goes over to him, right,
he tries to speak to Bootsy and he sits his hero,
(38:19):
and his hero is acting funny, not quite like Bootsy.
This almost Bootsy is like trying to like, oh, is
there a bathroom around here? Right? So he tries to
like slip away, and he manages to get out right.
But that's not the end of this story, because that
same almost Bootsy tried to like cad your ride with
the young bass player and his band. He did get
in the van with him and rode with them all
(38:40):
the way from New York to Washington, d C. So
I'm thinking, this is our Washington d C. Almost boots.
They get to d C, the almost Bootsy and the
young musicians, they hang out. They're like, hey, he's like, oh,
what where are y'all staying? Right? So maybe didn't notice
it at first because there's so stoke that Bootsy wants
to chill with them, They're like, oh my god, he's
still wants to hang This is dope. So time passes though,
(39:02):
they're like, hey, darting to divvy up beds or whatever,
and people are like, hey, Bootsy, you're gonna go to
get your own adort? Should we call you a cab?
The keyboardist in the band, who also meanwhile hero worship Bootsy,
he recalled how and I quote, I'm thinking, here's this
established famous musician, what's he doing hanging with us? Why
aren't we going out to a proper dinner and then
saying goodbye? Like normal, if you ran into one of
(39:24):
your heroes, you'd hang out. Who wouldn't turn into a
twenty four to seven thing? This almost Bootsy much time
with the hero exactly? Dude? Do you never want to
meet your heroes, especially when they're not really them, like
a fake one of your heroes? Even once? Yeah, so
this almost Bootsy. He wants to talk, of course, industry gossip,
so he starts running down people. He wants a dish
about how James Brown screwed him and George Clinton screwed him.
(39:47):
Then he asked this young band, oh, do you guys
have a little cash for Bootsy? And then of course
he disappears, never to be seen again. Yeah, smash cut Annah.
I'm California at the Annual Music Convention, which is a
national association of music merchants. Yeah, there's a guy there
who damn sure look like Bootsy. But not only that,
he's telling everyone he's Bootsy. So he's going around this
(40:09):
convention of music basically people selling guitars and basses and drums.
So this friend of Bootsy's who is there at NOM.
Here's the people shouting, Oh, Boots, he's here, Boots, He's
over there. I just saw a Bootsy. He's like, oh,
I didn't know Bootsy was in Anahem. I thought he
was back in Cincinnati. So, as the friend tells it,
I would say, what are you talking about. He's in Cincinnati,
he was here five minutes ago. So the friend tries
(40:32):
looking all around this Noom and he never catches up
to the almost Bootsy, but he did find the trail
of fraud that the almost BOUTSI left bey, Yes, this
fake funketeer got away with about ten thousand dollars worth
of even as guitars. Yeah, he had them. He arranged
for them to be sent to a po box in Louisiana.
There were also invoices from Limo companies. And then y
(40:55):
Bootsy's wife finally hears about this one. She's pissed again.
She tells the story, quote, he got away with a lot,
from what I'm told, thousands and thousands of dollars negative energy.
It was very disheartening. Yeah, So despite what his wife said,
Bootsy still remained a little amused by all the crime
and hijinks to being done in his name. One former collaborator,
he was telling the story to Rolling Stone. He said, quote,
(41:17):
we used to talk about that constantly, and every day
someone to say we heard he was in this place,
so he was here, and Boots he was always smiling
about it. And then when everyone found out that guy
was pulling a lot of endorsements, meaning he was getting
a lot of gear, everyone was sinking, Well, maybe that's
not cool because he couldn't sell that stuff. I don't
know why that's the line. He could sell that stuff,
like we don't want him profiting off being almost Bootsy.
(41:38):
So this same New York based Washington d C Corridor
Almost Bootsy, Yeah, he would continue to contribute to the
growing legend of the almost Bootsies around the country. One time,
another friend of Bootsies was in New York City and
the friend was convinced, or rather conned by Almost Bootsy.
This guy was that good, This guy actually knew Bootsy
(41:58):
hanging out with him.
Speaker 4 (41:59):
Oh, you're kidding.
Speaker 3 (42:00):
The musician, this guy, Freddy Perez, said, quote, you couldn't
tell the difference in his appearance and the way he spoke.
He used the same words Bootsy used, even the sound
of his voice everything. It was wazing. So since he
was convinced, and since he was a musician, Perez was like, hey,
Bootsy man, why don't you get up there and slap
your bass around? So, as he put it, I said,
(42:20):
I want to hear the funk. So the response was
he declined, very.
Speaker 2 (42:24):
Strange, ahead and decline.
Speaker 3 (42:26):
Yeah. What was stranger is while he was in DC,
this New York based Almost Bootsy did sit in with
a band. There's reports of him going up on stage
and sitting in, but he didn't play his bass. Instead,
he just sang because you know, everyone wants to hear
Bootsy sing. No one's like, hey, sit your bass down
for this one. Come on, Bootsy, give us those those
(42:47):
velvety tones. You know, what do you know of the
American songbook. So this same almost Bootsy he continues rampaging
up and down the Eastern Seaboard, hopping in vans with
young bands, playing shows as a singer. So finally the
real Bootsies team has to spring into like legal action. Yeah,
and they tried to put the kaibosh on this almost Bootsy.
(43:09):
So this is what the basically the point, This almost
Bootsy goes to the mattresses right like like they say,
and the Godfather. So now that they know it's a war,
so they're trying to get CAGI, so they try to
catch up to them in a New York and a
night spot. Almost Bootsy was there. He was celebrating the fans, right,
and then he's like he was sitting on a complimentary
champagne that he was getting from the management. The whole bit, right.
(43:30):
The DJ was there playing his new song because boots
he had a new song out, and it's just like
in this dance club, a couple of days later, an
executive calls that club and it's like, hey, how's Bootsy's
new song? Doing DJ's like, I got the craziest news
Bootsy was in the club, and the labels X like what, Yeah,
that's impossible. What are you talking about? Are you kidding?
So he calls Bootsy's wife. He's like, was Bootsy in
(43:51):
like whatever club? And she's like, no, he was in
a whole other stage. Yeah, exactly disconstantly is this Bootsy
the one eight hundred numbers she's got set up? So
the exact he calls back to the DJ, right, and
the DJ's like, well, I got that guy's number. I
got Bootsy's number because I asked him, right, he was exactly, Oh,
give it to me. I'd like to talk to Bootsy
(44:11):
and he's like, of course, right to DJ, he's now.
The exec gets the number from the DJ, slips it
to the authorities. The authorities like top up and they
call it up dead end. There was it was a
fake number he had slipped them. They're like, oh, yeah,
he's my number, right. So Bootsi's people at this point
they're really trying to like close their net on the
New York and Washington DC area, they find someone who
(44:33):
knows them or says they know him. They pass a
message like this is like back channel US Soviet nuclear negotiations. Right,
So they find somebody who says they know him. They're like, well,
give them this message. Meet us at this time. They
arrange a meeting. He shows up. Yes, one of Bootsy's
people is there, and they took it well, a couple
of people, and they took it very personally. What the
almost Bootsy had been up to. Yeah, right, as his
(44:54):
manager Ivy tells the story, the man from there was
another man there from Bootsy's team, this guy named Waller, right,
and so Bill Waller he goes medieval on this almost
Bootsy like he was. Ivy tells it. Bill was from
the old school, and I'll just say he used.
Speaker 4 (45:09):
Old school rules.
Speaker 3 (45:10):
Like Bill definitely wasn't Shug Night, but he wasn't anybody
you'd wanted to take lightly. So Yeah, there was some
talk later about getting the FBI involved. Rolling Stone even
submitted a Freedom of Information Act. I found a request
that they submitted one of their reports on this, and
the reporters were told by the FBI that the bureau
could quote, neither confirm nor deny the existence of such records,
(45:32):
So I'm going with the idea. There was some investigation
almost now, the reports of his appearances. They started to
calm down in the late eighties, they seemed to go away,
and then all of a sudden, nineteen ninety rolls around
Reggae Sunsplash festival in Jamaica, Elizabeth Bootsy gets spotted bringing
the funk to Reggae Sunsplash. Yeah. The next year there
(45:55):
were reports Bootsy was in la He was allegedly trying
to put on a benefit concert for veteran into the
First Gulf War. He contacted a British band called The Alarm,
and he tried to ye right, and so he tried
to coordinate their participation, and so they grew suspicious though
when he asked them to pay for his hotel room
and all his expenses, He's like, you could cover that
(46:17):
f a Bootsy right grocery. Meanwhile, the Internet is becoming
not quite common in nineteen ninety, so it existed, but
it was not like the band couldn't look him up. Yeah, exactly,
so they couldn't. They didn't know that d Light was
on tour and Bootsy Collins was with them playing the
groove is in the heart on international stages. They're like,
there's no way that's Bootsy trying to put together a
(46:39):
benefit concert for the veterans of the First Gulf War.
Speaker 4 (46:43):
The Alarm.
Speaker 3 (46:44):
The band they were suspicious about this concert, right, this benefit,
So they booted the almost Bootsy off their band bus
right and he leaves with his luggage. And my favorite
note is he also had with him a very large dog,
possibly a pet wolf. People in the b and could
not decide if it was a dogs. So was Van's
going around with luggage in a possibly Penny's that tight rolls.
(47:09):
So anyway, the band kicks this almost Bootsy off their bus.
He angrily yells at them, you will be hearing from
my lawyers. You will regret this, babies, Elizabeth, that was
not to occur. That was the last time ever heard
anyone ever heard from this guy. It was the last
time anyone ever seems to have heard from almost any
of the almost Bootsies. The trend passed on. So what's
(47:32):
that ridiculous takeaway here?
Speaker 2 (47:33):
I know, I thought it was interesting when you were
saying that Bootsy was like, I just want to play
the music.
Speaker 4 (47:38):
I didn't know what I was doing in terms of
the business.
Speaker 2 (47:40):
And that's you know what happens all the time. You
get musicians who they're not they're artistic souls, they're not
business minded folks, but yet it becomes a business. They're
they're not a businessman, they're a business man.
Speaker 3 (47:54):
Well said easy.
Speaker 2 (47:57):
So I just feel for them and I feel for
him because it's like, that's how they get taken advantage of.
Speaker 3 (48:01):
Okay, they want to focus on the Artaren.
Speaker 4 (48:03):
What's your ridiculous takeaway.
Speaker 3 (48:04):
That I have never been Bootsy Collins for Halloween?
Speaker 2 (48:08):
Oh? That is a crying shame, right, I mean.
Speaker 3 (48:10):
How did I miss this one? I've got a lot
of fun costumes here. I've got something to look forward to,
all right, Well, as we wash away all of the
funket's here? And yes, can I get a talkback produce
a d.
Speaker 6 (48:25):
Oh God?
Speaker 3 (48:31):
I love je.
Speaker 7 (48:36):
Saren Elizabeth? Can I just say how amazing you guys
are one of my favorite podcasts ever. I stumbled on
you back in the time when you did the Frank
Sinolfred Junior kidnapping story, and I literally almost wanted to
pitch my pants. It was so funny and so ridiculous
(48:57):
in these times. I have to say, I respect everything you've.
Speaker 4 (49:04):
Done in these times. Maybe I love making people pee themselves.
Speaker 3 (49:09):
Yes you do love that, Yes I do. I do well.
Speaker 4 (49:12):
I appreciate that sentiment from her that we do. We
need to we need to keep it loose these days, guys, we.
Speaker 3 (49:18):
All could use a laugh for oh well. As always.
You can find us online Ridiculous Crime on the social
media that's mostly Blue Sky and Instagram these days. From
what I understand from the interns, we also still have
Ridiculous Crime dot Com, our award winning website. I think
we are now up for a Michelin Award this year.
I'm very excited to see if our food will take
us over the line.
Speaker 4 (49:37):
That'd be amazing.
Speaker 3 (49:38):
Yeah, So email us if you'd like it at that
Ridiculous Crime at a gmail dot com and please start
the email dear producer d And also you can leave
us a talk back if you go to the iHeart app.
Obviously we love to hear from you, guys. Please leave
us a talkback and you may hear your voice here.
Thanks for listening. We will catch you next crime. Ridiculous
(50:03):
Crime is hosted by Elizabeth Dutton and Zarin Burnette, produced
and edited by her own Defunk all star Dave Conston
and starring Annelie's Rutgers. It You doth Research is by
Sequined top hat maker Marissa Brown and Star Shaped sunglass
collector Alex French. Our theme song is by our house
band James Blue and the RC's Thomas Lee and Travis Dutton.
(50:26):
The host wardrobe provided by Botany five hundred. Guest Harry,
makeup by Sparkleshot and mister Andre. Executive producers are boot
Zilla Truthers, Ben Bolmen and Noel Brown.
Speaker 4 (50:45):
Why Say It One More Time?
Speaker 7 (50:48):
Crime?
Speaker 1 (50:49):
Ridiculous Crime is a production of iHeartRadio four more podcasts.
My heart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or
wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Ridiculous Crime is a production of iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Yo, Elizabeth Dutton in here, Saron Burnett's name and joking
around McGee.
Speaker 3 (00:09):
Yeah. Well, I was hanging in here with the new
new intern Rosie.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Oh yeah, oh god, don't don't move quickly in front
of her.
Speaker 3 (00:15):
No kind of she is.
Speaker 4 (00:17):
She's buddy.
Speaker 3 (00:18):
So I'm glad you're here because that'll distract your a
little from my hands. So I got a question for you. Yeah,
do you know what's ridiculous?
Speaker 4 (00:26):
I do? I do.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
I'm kind of covering some road. I've already covered Pokemon, Pokemon.
Speaker 3 (00:32):
Pokemon, Oh yeah, yeah, Pokemon.
Speaker 4 (00:35):
And I've also talked about Cheetos before.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Yes you have, I have two of your great lovestional mashup. Hello,
So there was a Cheeto that looks like Pokemon Charizard
and yeah, and yeah it looks like Charizard, which I
suppose it does.
Speaker 4 (00:56):
It's one of those.
Speaker 3 (00:57):
Flaming hot ones flaming hot jar.
Speaker 4 (01:00):
So I guess everyone was like, oh my god, this
looks like good Pokemon.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
And then this first in Goal Collectibles got a hold
of it sometime between twenty eighteen and twenty twenty two.
They're being cagy about it. And they they fixed it
to a customized Pokemon card encapsulated in a clear card
storage box.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
Oh those are the best kind.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Yeah, and then it you know, it surged in popularity
on social media platforms in late twenty twenty four. According
to somebody, oh the auction site anyway, it went up
for auction.
Speaker 4 (01:32):
It just sold. The bidder bid seventy two thousand dollars.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
That's a lot of money.
Speaker 4 (01:37):
It wasn't And then with the buyer's.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
Premium it goes up to eighty seven and forty dollars
for a Pokemon Cheeto Cheeto card in a nice collectible case. Yeah,
and that one, I think it came from maybe a
couple of people, But the one that was forwarded to
me was from Monica on Instagram.
Speaker 4 (01:54):
So thank you Monica.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
Thanks Monica. Well that's a good one. I'll give you
that and Monica. But you know what else is ridiculous?
I got something for you.
Speaker 4 (02:03):
Please please tell me when you.
Speaker 3 (02:04):
Look like someone famous? Yeah, why not have fun with it?
Speaker 4 (02:07):
Right?
Speaker 3 (02:08):
It's all fun and games, well right up until you
decide to get criminally ridiculous.
Speaker 5 (02:12):
Sure is ziggy.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
This is Ridiculous Crime a podcast about absurd and outrageous capers, heists,
and cons. It's always ninety nine percent murder free and
one hundred percent ridiculous. Yeah, I know you feel me
on that, Elizabeth. You also love a good story like
me about criminal celebrity lookalikes.
Speaker 4 (02:56):
Correct, Oh, completely.
Speaker 3 (02:57):
Right, they're always fun. Well, boys, howdy do I have
some fun ones for you today?
Speaker 4 (03:02):
Thank you?
Speaker 3 (03:02):
Well, really, it's anyway you'll see. It's it's a bunch
of them. But they're all kind of it's simple. They're
related to well, I don't want to ruin it. First up,
I want to tell you about a woman who was
hired to perform in Sorry noam Okay, that's fun. That's
not common. That's like worth taking a trip right now.
The woman's name is Trina Johnson Finn, and the story goes.
Trina was a career backup singer, the kind you find
(03:24):
in Las Vegas, right, that's where she was working in
before her adventure in Surry nom Now. Over the years,
she'd performed like with Barbara streisand as a backup singer.
She toured with EMPs Hammer for five years.
Speaker 4 (03:36):
Like a singer and a dancer, more.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
Of a backup singer. Okay, now, She had her own
one woman's show that ran through a cavalcade of song. Right,
it's a musical history of Las Vegas. It was like
a tour of the American songbook. She sings songs by
Gladys Knight and the Pips. He'd cover songs by Tina Turner.
She had range, right, and apparently she sang a wicked
proud Mary. Now this is why she gets hired to
(03:59):
go down to that little country there just north of Brazil.
Speaker 4 (04:02):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
Now, Trina was booked by an outfit called Events for Surreyname,
and it was run by this shady promoter named Angel
Ventura or on hell Ventura, which totally sounds like a
made up name, right, it sounds like the kind of
name you would expect for like, I don't know, professional wrestler.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
All yes, totally Anyway, this cat Ventura.
Speaker 3 (04:23):
He books Trina as the singer for a Tony Braxton
tribute show. So she flies down for that, except he
told the crowd it would really be Tony Braxton. Yeah,
so Tina didn't know the real score, or so she claims. Now,
she flew down to surreynam When she got there, ready
to perform, she learns that the audience is expecting Tony Braxton.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
Oh no, break their hearts, Sarah, exactly.
Speaker 3 (04:46):
You feel me now, This poor woman, she's got a
moment to decide. She's all made up, right, What will
she do? Would she go out on stage and pretend
to be Tony Braxton? Or would she keep her integrity
tell the promoter to go get bent and fly back
home to the US. I think you know what choice
she d Trina decided to go out on stage. This
crowd in Surryna was expecting Tony Braxton. Damn it. She
(05:06):
was gonna give them Tony Braxton. Problem was they knew
Tony Braxton because they were fans of Tony Braxton. So
she goes out there, she takes the stage, she performs
her set right, her first song is apparently solid, but
something just ain't right.
Speaker 4 (05:20):
Well, I'm guessing it's not a huge venue.
Speaker 3 (05:22):
Well it's a stadium, but it is. Yeah, it's not
like a tiny club. It's like a stadium. So there's
a little distance between her and the crowd. Yeah, she
can kind of pull it off. But like Tony Braxton,
I don't know if she's known for her dance moves.
It's mostly her voice and her persona.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
And the balaklava I would hope with hope.
Speaker 3 (05:38):
Right. So she's out there and she can see the
crowd's faces and they do not look like they're into
this show. Some look confused, others look upset, some are
just mad. No one's smiling though, right, So Trina tries
to shake it off. Maybe her second song will win
them over. So this is when the booze now start
to rain down on her. Folks. In the first few rows,
(06:00):
they're shooting daggers with their eyes at her. Trina, though,
keeps singing she's committed, you know, she's the show's got
to go on, and she's on now the show, So
trying like hell, she tries to win over the crowd.
Then she gets hit with a glass of beer. Oh no,
it's a plastic Yeah, luckily it's a plastic cup, splashes
its contents all over her. That's bad. It's also very
fun for the crowd. So now a glass bottle comes up.
(06:23):
Oh that's bad. That's yeah, that's worse. Then another plastic glass,
and then another bottle and another. The crowd is fully
turned on her, right, so the Trina waves for the
DJ cut the music. Cut the music, right, he does.
She turns to the crowd and tells them we're gonna
stop the show now, which they did that exactly that,
and Trina cuts out. Not only does she leave the stage,
she leaves the venue.
Speaker 4 (06:44):
Just who made a promise?
Speaker 3 (06:46):
Exactly Also I forgot to mention, but once she was backstage,
she looked for the promoter on Hell Ventura, and ode
On Hell had disappeared. He was gone, right, he got
the money from the gate and was whooped gone. The
next day, Trina and her husband they get confronted by
the local police. They're like, you know, this was straight
up fraud. You got to give these people their money back.
They're like, we don't have the money. They get arrested,
(07:08):
taken to the police station, interrogated. The day after that,
oh wow, it was definitely. This is like in the
early two thousand, so it was like an expensive ticket.
Then the day after they get initially interrogated, they're feeling
like they're pressing their luck hanging out in Surinam. Once again,
(07:29):
they do not have the money to make this right. America,
Las Vegas is essentially right, So yeah, that's in America.
They trying to make a break for it. They flee
to the airport. In this desperate attempt to escape Surinam
right her and her husband, the couple, they reached the
airport and that's where they're confronted by police. Yet again,
they're detained at the airport. They don't make it out.
(07:51):
The promoter Ventura, though he's pulled a full Harry Houdini.
Cops can't find him. He's gone. He did not go
to the airport, he went some other way.
Speaker 4 (07:58):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (07:58):
So the police though, since they have training, and they're like, well,
it's just throw the law look at her, and so
they do that. Now Trina's on the hook for all
the sins of on hell. Ventura. Her husband also though,
because I don't know, he's just her husband, he gets arrested,
also detained for two weeks. He's locked up. Finally, after
two weeks are like, we have nothing on this guy.
So they send him back to America. But meanwhile, in
that two weeks time, he lost his job because he
(08:21):
was a realtor and his employer was like, man, we
don't need a realtor who's like cooling his heels into
jail and Surinam. Yeah, so he gets back and then
what's he has to do now is get his wife
freaked because she's still detained and the authorities have no
immediate plans to let her go because they do have
charges on her. So her husband flies back to America
without her. Once he's home, he begins selling the couple's
(08:42):
few assets to raise money to fight her case.
Speaker 4 (08:45):
Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
Now, so, Elizabeth, I don't know if you've ever spent
time in jail, or specifically jail and surinam, but I
know you don't. I didn't want to put you on
the spot an embarrassing front of producer Dan. But let
me tell you it's no country sleigh ride right Anyway,
Trina caught all kinds of hell when she was locked
up or calling her time behind bars. I found a
quote from Trina she explained how a quote, it was
(09:07):
like being locked up in a very poor country like Jamaica.
If you can imagine that, it was very nasty, run down.
The toilet was not working, so it's said, yeah, so
instead of her proper john, though, Trina was forced to
use a small metal bucket as her toilet. A bucket, Elizabeth, Yeah.
Speaker 4 (09:26):
That's what I have?
Speaker 3 (09:27):
Really? Is that what that is in your car. Well, see,
I always wonder where do you empty the bucket? Do
you throw it out the cell window like you live
in a medieval castle, or did this someone come around
with like a honeywagon. You go like empty it twice
like a day, Like how does that work with the bit.
Speaker 4 (09:39):
In the corner of a Walmart parking lot?
Speaker 3 (09:41):
Not your bucket, fair bucket, their bucket.
Speaker 4 (09:44):
I don't know. I'm gonna guess they throw it out
the window.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
Okay, the prison or the jail. Well, anyway, back to Trina,
enough bucket. She also remembered how bleak the living conditions
were in her cell, and she wanted to talk about that,
so she focused on the shower. She was very liquid focused,
so she Trina said, the rooms were just nasty. I
had an old bed that was extremely hard. You showered
by catching water coming out of the faucet in a
bucket and washing down that way.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Their buckets buckets, and the buckets are multipleower your bucket.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
They're like, oh man, yeah, my shower.
Speaker 4 (10:19):
But I wonder what was the lighting like? Was that
tough to imagine?
Speaker 3 (10:22):
It was diom So Trina's time in jail seems like
a rather excessive punishment for pretending to be Tony Braxton.
But despite what she had, she had to suffer for
putting on this fake show. Trina tries to survive her
new life after lock up. Now after she and her husband,
they keep trying to fight her case, right, so he
pays for lawyers. She gets herself some local lawyers. She
(10:42):
is also hoping her story of wrongful incarceration might go
viral and help her to get free. That did not happen, Elizabeth.
So she's down.
Speaker 4 (10:50):
There because something went wrong there.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
You go, well, worse than that for her, since you know,
she's not getting viral fame for her suffering, and and
they started on. No one seems to care about the
fate of this phony Tony Braxton forre and a half
months behind bars. Finally, Trina's case goes to trial in
May of two thousand and nine. That's when a miracle occurs.
(11:13):
A miracle. Elizabeth, the ever mysterious long presumed disappeared promoter
on Hell Ventura reappears on the scene. Oh really, yeah,
better than that. He shows up in court. Trina tells it. Quote,
they said they found him, but I think he just
turned himself in and had probably paid a lot of
people off to avoid taking responsibility for this. Well, so
when paying people off failed, he finally agreed to face
(11:36):
the music. So back to Trina quote, I don't think
there's any big man hunt for him, but the prestice
was generating internationally forced them to take a look at
the real evidence. And we had a contract specifically stating
that I was a tribute act. He basically got called
out and had to turn himself in.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
So where was this contract? Couldes she show the police?
Speaker 3 (11:56):
Apparently I don't ask. I guess maybe he still hasn't
his BF case and she's like, look at his briethdays
find the contract. I do not know the details were
scarce got it? Got it? So once they do have
this slippery promoter on the witness stand, as I am
imagining it, he confesses to his part in the fake
Tony Braxton scam concert, gets convicted, sentenced to two and
a half years in prison. Wowrin sur on prison with the.
Speaker 2 (12:19):
Buckets of bucket.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
I hope you like buckets, buddy, so is Trina. She
gets sent home to America, where she returns to Vegas
and her one woman tour of the American songbook, So
they're happy ending for her, right, Yeah, Trina, Now I've
got a much bigger surprise for you, and this one
that was about to tell you. It's a series of stories,
but they all involve a very famous man who is
Snoop Dogg's uncle.
Speaker 4 (12:40):
Is Snoop Dogg's uncle is famous?
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Yeah, let's take a little break and after these beautiful,
beautiful lads we will be back. I'll tell you about
this famous man who is Snoop Dogg's uncle.
Speaker 6 (12:51):
All right, Elizabeth Zaren do you figure out who Snoop
(13:14):
Dogg's famous uncle was?
Speaker 3 (13:15):
No, you really don't know? You have any guesses? U? No, Well,
the stories will be about folks who pretend to be
Snoop's famous uncle, not actually about Snoop's famous uncle.
Speaker 2 (13:25):
That was it his uncle on his mother's side or
his father's side.
Speaker 3 (13:29):
I didn't examine his last name, Brotus. I didn't examine
the actual genealogy. They just both claim each other as
nephew and uncle.
Speaker 4 (13:37):
Oh was it like play uncle?
Speaker 2 (13:38):
No?
Speaker 3 (13:38):
I think I think it's real. I don't think it's play.
I think it's real. I'll give you a hint. His
name rhymes with cutesy rawlins. What, Yes, Bootsy as in
Collins Uncle, the Calvin brotus aka Snoop Dogg.
Speaker 4 (13:53):
How in the what I know?
Speaker 7 (13:55):
Right?
Speaker 3 (13:55):
Yeah? Everything I found that I could find online. It
could not find like their sestry dot com, but I.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Found I don't know what you're going to talk about
ahead of time. I will go on to ancestry dot
com after this.
Speaker 3 (14:08):
Yeah you should. Yeah, I don't even have it like
a log in. So bootsy seks to be the word
bootsy is slang that you use all the time. What
does bootsy mean to you?
Speaker 2 (14:16):
To me? When I say something is bootsy, it's you know,
it's a less than high quality.
Speaker 4 (14:22):
It's it's kind of janky.
Speaker 3 (14:24):
Okay, another one, all right, so that's a synonym for bootsy.
Speaker 4 (14:27):
Think you know, uh poor quality? Gross?
Speaker 3 (14:31):
Okay, now we got a definition. Yes, I guess all right,
Well I feel I feel like whenever you say it,
I totally get what you mean. But then also I
obviously think of Bootsy when I hear it, I think
of Bootsy Collins. So when I say bootsy as in
Bootsy Collins, what do you picture? What do you imagine?
Speaker 2 (14:45):
I imagine huge platform boots, and like star shaped sunglasses. Yes, Bootsy.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
How about his star based that he nicknamed space.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Bas Yes, space based?
Speaker 3 (14:57):
Well a little just about Bootsy. He was born William
Earl aka Bootsy Collins. He was born nineteen fifty one.
His mama nicknamed him Bootsy. He once asked her, like,
why did you name your baby boy Bootsy?
Speaker 2 (15:11):
Right?
Speaker 3 (15:11):
Because I imagine like you was. It doesn't sound like
it's exactly a compliment. His mama told him, and I
quote because you looked like a Bootsy And he said,
I left it at that, you know, mama said, So
Bootsy's Collins. He's He first came to prominence in James
Brown's band, the JBS. Right now. He played on a
raft of James Brown's legendary songs. Hey, I'll tell you
a couple of them. Get up. I feel like being
(15:33):
a sex machine. He was on super Bad, He's on
Soul Power. So like right when James is getting funky,
he's there. He's the one who introduces or helps introduce
the funk. He gave those tracks. That's super funky. So
him and his brother Catfish Collins low End. Yeah, Now,
as you might imagine, working for James Brown was no
picnic in the park. Her stories, I imagine right now
(15:55):
it is. Bootsy remembered it in one colorful story about
his time with the Godfather's Soul. He said, and I quote,
he treated me like a son, and being out of
a father this home, I needed that father figure and
he really played up to it. I mean, good lord.
Every night after we played a show, he called us
back to give us a lecture about how horrible we sounded.
(16:15):
Not on that son. I didn't hear that one. You
didn't give me the one. He would tell me this
after every show. One night we knew we wasn't sounding
really good. We were off, and he called us back
there and he said, oh, now that's what I'm talking about.
Y'all was on it tonight. You hit the one. My
brother and I looked at each other like this mother
has got to be crazy. We knew in all heart
(16:36):
and soul that we wasn't all on that show. So
then I started figuring out his game. Man by telling
me that I wasn't on it, he made me practice
hort up. So I just absorbed what he said and
used it in a positive way. So that was about
how he did it.
Speaker 4 (16:52):
I like that I didn't.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
I needed a father figure, someone who would criticized him needless.
Speaker 3 (16:57):
A real tough, hard hand is what I'm looking for.
James Brown, like I keep my hands strong. So he
got this tiny tyrant James Brown, right, who's just like
a bound muscle of aggression on stage and off right.
So in the meantime, Bootsy, he's trying to handle the
stress of dealing with his boss and now he's like,
you know, newfound and growing fame as a musician, so
he chooses to self medicate. His medicine of choice was LSD. Oh,
(17:22):
that's an interesting as Bootsy tells it, LSD was a
big part of why I left James Brown's band. I
promise myself I'd never do it during a show, but
we had a father son relationship, and he pestered me
so much not to do it that one day I
just did. My base turned into a snake and I
can't even remember playing. After he called me in the
(17:43):
back room as he always did and was explaining how
terrible I was, even when I wasn't taking LSD. I
laughed so hard I was on the floor. To him,
that was very disrespectful. He had his body God throw
me out. So he's high in LSD and he gets
thrown out of James.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
Brown's the tech bro micro dos.
Speaker 3 (18:05):
No, he's doing MAXI dosing MAXI do. Yeah, He's like,
how many he did? He says he did elist every
day for two years.
Speaker 4 (18:12):
What, yes, Bootsy, I don't think that's healthy.
Speaker 3 (18:16):
No, but it helped him decide it was time to
move on from James Brown. Okay, Boots it is. It
helped him to see things in a new way, give
him new perspectives and insights. He stayed with James bound
for about a year, but I think it's like eleven months. No,
he and his brother, Catfish Collins, they split from the band.
What a great pair of names, right, these are my sons,
Bootsy and Catfish. So next up the brothers Bootsy and Catfish.
(18:38):
They joined George Clinton's band, Parliament Funkade. Now that's where
Bootsy becomes a superstar, right, that's where we think of
him with the star shaped sunglasses, the yeah, you know,
the platform heals. So George Clinton, obviously he appreciates all
the way out there antics in the funky bass of
Bootsy Collins. So Bootsy stayed with George Clinton in Parliament
(18:59):
Forkadelic for the rest of the seventies and into the eighties,
and together they make the funkiness into a cultural revolution.
So over the years, Bootsy tries on many many personas,
like there's boots Zilla, right aka quote the world's only
Ryan Stone rockstar, mon still of a doll. So because
of course, you know, Bootsy would see himself as an
(19:20):
alien rock star. Sure has come to Earth to spread
the gospel of funk. It's all that makes sense, right,
I mean, it's right there, Elizabeth. So over the years,
obviously there are other personas. One that was all mentioned
was Casper the Funky Ghost. Okay, that's me, Yeah, Bootsy Collins.
He's always on. He was one of a kind basically, right,
which makes it super wild that there were a bunch
of people who tried to impersonate him, like a bunch Yeah,
(19:42):
they called him almost Bootsies like. Some did it well
and some were surprisingly successful, others not so much. So
it started off when Bootsy heard about this one cat
out there who kind of looked like him, and he
was charging money to sign autographs at events. Like he
would go to some small city and he'd find a
nightclub or a Ants Club and he posts up there.
Then he'd start to like greet his fans and he'd
(20:03):
shake some hands and if anyone wanted an autograph, he's like, oh,
that'd be five dollars or whatever.
Speaker 4 (20:08):
Oh my god.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (20:09):
So his manager, Bootsy Collins manager Archie Ivy recalled quote
there were Bootsy sightings all over the place where Bootsy
wasn't So now what was Bootsy's initial response, Well, according
to Ivy, we just shrugged it off and said, boots
he's a real star. Now, we didn't take things seriously.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Well, that is a good point. That shows what a
star you are.
Speaker 3 (20:30):
That totally people want to be you.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
Well, and I think because he doesn't like if you
asked me to pick his just plane face with no
hair out of a lineup.
Speaker 4 (20:41):
I couldn't do it.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Be very difficult. He usually's wearing a sequin top hat. Yes,
star shaped sunglasses. You just see a bit of a
slender black face.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
Yes, So if you have the same build, then yeah,
you just put the accessories on and yeah, speaking come Bootsy.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
George Clinton tried it on for a weekend.
Speaker 4 (20:56):
It's maybe it's like santy Claus.
Speaker 3 (20:59):
Kind of Bootsy clubs George. As I was saying, George Clinton,
his bandmate been Parliament falcadelic. He found it all hilarious
that people wanted to be Bootsy, so you know he
would he said, and I quote, I thought it was
funny that someone got away with it that far, right, now,
George Clinton, he also tried to, as I said, be
boot become Bootsy, and to see what he could get
away with. So, as he remembered it, one time he
(21:20):
was backstage and he tried to make some young woman
laugh and he put on the Bootsy costume. And George
Clinton tells the story and I quote, somebody came to
see Bootsy and they had never seen him up close.
And I put on the star glasses and said yeah, Bubba,
which was one of the trademark catchphrases of his persona
boot Zilla. So I was with the girl for two
or three days before Bootsy showed up. I told Bootsy
(21:42):
I was him. So he says right to boss face, and.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
He's just like, oh wow, okay, No, of.
Speaker 3 (21:49):
Course everybody in the story is kite high.
Speaker 4 (21:52):
Well, it's like.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
When I was little and growing up, we'd be driving
and if we saw a car exactly like ours, same
make model color. My mother would say to us, Oh,
maybe that's us and we just don't know it, And
that just messed with my.
Speaker 3 (22:05):
Head so badly sent your little head slide right.
Speaker 4 (22:07):
Yeah, I'd be like, oh what if it is?
Speaker 3 (22:09):
Yeah, parallel universe right there. I hope we make it.
Speaker 4 (22:13):
You know, she got there.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
Now speaking about there. But my man Bootsy, as you
point out right, he was a bit easier to imitate
because his look is so iconic and so people it's
largely a costume. People just need the star shape, sunglasses
and uh. As his manager Ivy points out, it wasn't
like impersonating prints where he had to worry about height.
With Bootsy, you make yourself tall with platform boots, put
(22:37):
on a top hat and the star glasses and a
lot of shiny stuff. Bootsie's voice is basically a cartoon character,
so if you had the right phrase and attitude, I
can see it being pulled off.
Speaker 4 (22:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
So, now if you ask Bootsy what he thought about
all this sudden wave of imitators, he'd tell you, as
he once told Rolling Stone, and I quote, at first,
I thought it was funny until some close friends started
to tell me about how the almost Bootsy started to
rip people off because he's very positive. It's fun when
people are having fun. But now they're out there trying
to like scam in his name. He's like, that ain't
(23:10):
right now, that ain't Bootsy. So Bootsy did he get
to have some fun with it? Right? He even offered
his fans their very own Bootsy costume, like his nineteen
seventy eight album he had was called Bootsy Player of
the Year right. That album included a pair of fake
star cut cardboard sunglasses. A fan could cut them out
and become Bootsy. So this obviously led to Bootsy saying
(23:32):
at the time, it seems that in the past year
there's been a lot of fake teers running around almost
Bootsies who's been trying to.
Speaker 2 (23:40):
Be me.
Speaker 3 (23:42):
Bakaders. Yeah, because obviously the funketeers is to play on.
So Bootsy Uh. The very next year, for his next album,
This boot is Made for Funking', he had a song
called she Jam parenthetical almost Bootsy show. So he addressed
it directly and in the lyrics Bootsy sang and I
(24:02):
quote without singing, said everyone they were almost Bootsy decked
out in the staw shaped shades, little boys and girls.
They were almost Bootsy shining all over the place. So
there you go. That was some cute fun for Boots.
Speaker 4 (24:17):
That's great.
Speaker 3 (24:18):
So anyway, one of the almost Bootsies that we've been
you know, teasing out, they walked into the headquarters of
Warner Brothers Records in Burbank. The almost Bootsy he told
someone in Warner Brothers office, I'm Bootsy and then said
I'm luck my next royalty check.
Speaker 2 (24:33):
Oh, like it didn't get delivered to the house.
Speaker 4 (24:36):
I guess can I just can I cancel that one?
Just issue me a new one.
Speaker 3 (24:39):
I was traveling, I thought I just come right to
the office.
Speaker 4 (24:42):
To make it easier on you.
Speaker 3 (24:43):
So the folks at Warner Brothers, they were used to
odd behavior from Bootsy, right, Oh yeah, but this was unprofessional, right,
and a little more than sus So the folks at
Warner Brothers they call Bootsi's manager, Archie Ivy, and the
manager when he hears that Bootsy is in a Burbank
in the Warner Brothers office asking them run me my check.
He thought it was because Bootsy knew his royalty checks
were distributed by his company and not by Warner rog
(25:07):
so yeah, the manager recalled that he'd just spoken with
the funketeer himself just two days prior in the Cincinnati area.
Then the reason why this matters, Elizabeth is that Bootsy
was afraid of flying. He would avoided at all costs. Yeah,
so he would have driven across country from Ohio to California,
and that most likely would have taken longer than two days.
Speaker 4 (25:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (25:27):
So Ivy the manager, he had the execs Warner Brothers
stall this almost Bootsy who was asking for the royalty
check that the execs from the label. They did as requested.
They stall him, but they left him alone. Right, So
then they go they go back to the call. Okay,
we stalled him, and then they go back to him
and they're like, wait, where'd he go? Yeah, he took
off gone almost Bootsy, he bootsied out the door. But
(25:48):
he was not the last almost Bootsy because there were
actually there were quite a few. As George Clinton recalled,
there was this funny thing was how when he wasn't
on stage, Bootsy was not so outsized. You know a
lot of performers, but people always imagined he was Bootsy
twenty four to seven. So Bootsy was actually rather shy.
So it was kind of the tell if you knew
boots he was if he's being outsized when he's not
(26:11):
in a stage setting, it's not Bootsy.
Speaker 2 (26:14):
That's like me, you know. It's like, I'm so hyper
infrenetic on this show.
Speaker 3 (26:18):
So exactly the place I'm like, Elizabeth climbed down from
the walls.
Speaker 4 (26:21):
Right, and so we're scaring in the in the world.
Speaker 3 (26:25):
May meet you, and you're just a very calm today.
Kashmir sweater.
Speaker 4 (26:28):
You wouldn't believe it.
Speaker 3 (26:30):
Yeah, wearing track pants exactly. George Clinton framed it. Bootsy
was shy. He couldn't have been to all those parties,
but people wanted to see Bootsy and be with them.
I went to a few places and people would say,
I just saw Bootsy. They might have been a couple
of them. So they're just Bootsies popping up everywhere. Yeah,
I just showed up with the glasses, the hat. I'm Bootsy.
(26:50):
So just imagine a world with a multiplicity of Bootsies, right,
would that be good? And that's like we need one? Yeah,
that'd be kind of insane. But rather than picture that, Elizabeth,
I thought I'd take you up run and personal to
your very own almost bootsy sighting. Yes, Elizabeth, I'd like
you to close your eyes. I'd like you to picture it. Elizabeth.
It's the early nineteen eighties and you were seated at
(27:11):
a corner table in a nightclub in Washington, DC. The
crowd is a mix of the hip and the hangers on.
All around you, you can hear men and women's laughter,
low conversations, glasses, plank lighters, spark to life, to burn,
the business end of a cigarette. At the moment you're
seated at the corner table, the coolest people in the room.
Most of the folks with you are musicians just like you.
(27:34):
You're the drummer in a local funk band, and at
the moment you and the rest of your band are
absolutely giddy because seated with you is the one and
only Bootsy Collins, the master of the space bass himself.
He's wearing his signature star shaped sunglasses, his sequin top hat,
and at the moment he's telling you stories about hanging
out with the famous folks whose names you know. In
(27:54):
the music you revere, He's mentioned playing gigs with James
Brown and the JB. He talks about his time with
the Atomic dog George Clinton playing in jams with Sly
but without the family stone. The weird part, though, is
how Boots he keeps bad mouth and everyone he's ever
played with or worked for. At the moment, Bootsy is drunk,
(28:15):
loud talking. Bits of spittle hit your face as he
tells you how James never understood that Boots he ain't
from planet Earth. Boots is from planet for Gozella, the
known home planet of the one and only boots Zella.
You dig babies now, ignoring the bits of liquor up
the spittle as he talks, It's fun to take a
trip down memory lane with Bootsy. Here's someone who seems
(28:37):
to note just about everyone in music. However, it's still
a bummer how he has almost nothing good to say
about any of them. His mood switches on a dome
with a great flourish Bootsy holds up a credit card
and waves it around like a composer's baton Boots, he
says loud enough for all the nightclub waiters to hear,
We're gonna have fun with this plastic Yeah, now, indeed
(28:59):
you all do. Another round of drinks is ordered, more
food is ordered. When the flaming drinks arrive at the table.
You blow out yours and take the first sip. You
think to yourself, it sure feels good to party with
music Royalty. There's a band getting set up on stage
in this little nightclub. Someone in your party spots this development.
It says to Bootsy, you should get up and grab
(29:20):
a base and funk this place up. Bootsy laughs at
the idea, ha ha, like it's a big joke, but
you won't let the idea go. You keep nudging Bootsy
to take the stage into unleash the Bootzilla on this crowd.
Boots he just keeps laughing.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
Ah.
Speaker 3 (29:36):
But it's like it's the funniest idea is ever heard.
But it's not that funny anyway. Bootsy turns to you
and asks, how are you fixed with cash? Now? He
says he happens to be caught riding low on the greenbacks.
He says he just has his credit cards on him,
but he needs some walking around money for Bootsy. Now,
could you loan boots Is some bucks? The question throws you,
and you hear yourself say, without thinking, what about your royalties?
(29:59):
Can't you just like ask for a line of credit
at a bank against them? Boots He laughs off the idea,
ha ha ha, same as when it was suggested that
he should play the bass on stage. Boutsi just says,
does anyone else in your band have any cash? A
little something to help out Bootsy? Now you're getting annoyed.
Why is this rich rock star trying to pull dollars
out of your band's gas money? So you say to Bootsy,
(30:21):
aren't you loaded? You're Bootsy? That elicits another big Bootsy laugh.
Bosieck loves that. Now the master of the space base says,
if that's right, baby Rom Bootsie Tom next up Planet
funk Azilla. He excuses himself to go to the bathroom.
The band is nearly set up. Now you wonder what
(30:41):
Bootsy will think of them. But you never find out
because boots He never comes back to the table. In fact,
you never see him again. And it turns out, even
though he waved his card around, he never actually paid
for all the drinks and the food that he ordered
for the table, which means you and the band have
to pick up the tab for Bootsy. So much for
the band's gas money. Oh man, So, as you might guess,
(31:04):
that was not the real Bootsy Collins. Did you party
with in DC, Elizabeth? You spent the night with a
high dollar almost Bootsy. Did you have fun? Right? There
was a lot of fun though. Yeah. Sure, Okay, let's
take a little break and after these messages we'll be
back with more fake bootsies, Elizabeth. As we've covered Bootsy,
(31:43):
my man Bootsy, Your man Bootsy a bit outsized, also
a bit shy. You enjoying the stories of I am
the dichotomy of the Funkozoa. Now, when Bootsy obviously was
off stage and feeling shy, he was still Bootsy that interestingly,
though he would be dressed as the space alien funketeer,
he would just tone down his behavior and use his
(32:04):
normal talking voice. He'd be at home wearing his star
sunglasses and some outrageous shiny outfit. His booking agent actually remember,
and I found this quote from him. He said, I
never saw him running around in Bermuda shorts and a
tank top. He was always Bootsy, So you know, bermudas
and a tank I don't know what's why he goes
with right, it's very early eighties, I guess you know,
(32:25):
you can make sure a lot.
Speaker 2 (32:26):
Of people, well, you can either dress like that or
you can dress like Bootsy. Those your only choice.
Speaker 3 (32:30):
In nineteen eighty two, that was the choice, that was
the law. So as you can probably hear, it's not
easy to become such a character and not lose kind
of like a sight of yourself or part of your humanity.
And the even more extreme cases, which is what Bootsy
was worried about, was happening to him. Yeah, Plus he's
taking acid every day for two years. So eventually, by
the early eighties, after a decade at the Heights of Funk,
Bootsy decided he was over it. Right as he told
(32:52):
Rolling Stone, and I quote, I got so tired of
living up to the Bootsy character. I'd become a so
called star. I just didn't know how to handle it.
So it was a real crisis for the residents Space
Alien And as he later told The Guardian, and I quote,
I got worn out from being Bootsy going into the eighties,
I was trying to get away from him. He was
hitting up the festivals, the stadiums, headlining for one hundred
(33:14):
thousand people. He was like a monster. The business side
got really big and ugly because I didn't know what
I was doing. I was just there to play music
and the next thing I knew everything had turned around.
Now this leads to a crisis for Boozy. Right at
this point, he's still gobbling acid like you know, like
it's Flintstone vitamins. So this is becoming a problem for him.
(33:35):
Eventually he has a bad motorcycle accident. Now he may
or may not have been asked on acid at the time.
I could not get that straight. But could you imagine
crashing on a motorcycle on LSD?
Speaker 4 (33:44):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (33:45):
God, right, are you just tripping and all of a sudden,
like I just can't imagine. I was thinking about that. Yeah,
And it slows down fat and then you just like
then you feel your skin grab against the pavement and
then it's like, oh my skin, where did it go?
So the shame of all this is that while others
were out having fun being almost to Bootsies, the real
deal is stuck being Bootsy and he felt like it
was a private hell to be Bootsy, And unlike the
(34:07):
almost Bootsies, he can't take off his costume and stop
being Bootsy because it's now a part of him, right,
all right, So, but he did step back from the
character he creates nineteen eighty two, he leaves the party
life behind. He settles down on the twenty three acre
ranch back in Ohio near Cincinnati. Yeah, his mama told
him to take off his top hat and his star
sunglasses and just be her boy Bootsy again, be himself, right,
(34:29):
you beaus up, baby boy. Now. Two years later, nineteen
eighty four, he decided he should probably also stop doing drugs.
Probably not just the ranch.
Speaker 4 (34:37):
Advisable when you're on the ranch, the drug.
Speaker 3 (34:40):
Yeah, that's basically what he came to, he said, and
I quote, I throwed all my drugs away and I
stopped taking them. That's when it started to become clear
what I needed to get back to, which was the music.
So what meant for him keeping the costume off was
that Bootsy was seeing walking around his home in the
bermuda shorts and the tank tops. Eventually worrying what people
(35:00):
might call normal clothes, right, so he puts the star
sunglasses of the rhinestone top hats in a spare room.
But not only that, he locked the door. Oh really,
he shuts his past self away behind a padlock. Meanwhile,
the almost Bootsies don't know this, so they're still going
around the world being full tailed Bootsies, still claiming to
be him and one of his new musical collaborators around
this time, he recalled his early eighties phase Bootsies, and
(35:23):
he described all these almost Bootsies, and he recalled what
Bootsy told him. And this is a quote of Bootsy
from somebody else. Okay, so yeah, those mothers tried to
impersonate me, but they didn't get too far with it.
He would laugh about things like that. He was telling
everyone to be Bootsy, but so when somebody did it,
he didn't really bother him much. Yeah, but the strangeness
of the almost Bootsies persisted. Right now, we're into the eighties,
(35:46):
go go, let me see what I can get away with.
Sure it starts getting to leaving the uglier right. So,
one of the almost Bootsies, well, this is probably one
of the last silly moments. He dropped off some laundry,
said he claimed to be Bootsie Collins. I guess he
just wanted laundry. Yeah, he wanted Bootsy to pay for
his dry cleaning. I guess, like I think he thought
maybe Bootsy had like an account there. Maybe he saw
Bootsy go there and he's like, let me just drop
(36:07):
off my drag.
Speaker 4 (36:08):
Cleaning, the getting like a sparkly pants drike clean.
Speaker 3 (36:12):
Yeah, I do not know, but it was. It was
one of the stories mentioned that I thought was interesting.
Another one that was a kind of ticklish was they
had a fax machine in their home in Cincinnati because
it's nineteen eighties, and so someone faxes them and wanted
to perform a Bootsy check. It was someone in La
telling people that there was Bootsy Collins, right, So someone
faxed over to the house his Bootsy home, right, And
(36:33):
so the almost Bootsy had checked into some luxury hotel
like I'm imagining, like on Wilshare Boulevard, right, and they
were demanding a free room and free room service. And
his wife, who receives this fact, right, she calls back
to La and it's like, no, he's here at home.
He is not there, right.
Speaker 2 (36:48):
So meanwhile, when he doesn't sound like the type who's like,
give me a free room exactly.
Speaker 3 (36:52):
But people don't know, like the person who's working the
front desk, the this is this is star behavior. They're
all like this or whatever, and they move along and
they approve it. So the the guy gets away with it.
The almost Bootsy gets a free night, a hot meal
and everything else. And his wife not as amused as
Bootsy would have abused. She was super annoyed by this
right because now they're starting to make it's a bad name,
it's a bad look. The press may get confused. So
(37:13):
another call comes to the house, this time from Vegas.
There were reports of yet another almost Bootsy. His wife
super annoyed with this one because the Vegas Casino hotel
had complied and given Bootsy the free room the room service.
Once again bad behavior on his parts. And now she's like,
that's not Bootsy, it's the impersonator. She's like yelling at people.
She wants there to be like a Bootsy block. So
(37:35):
my favorite almost Bootsy was in nineteen eighty eight. They
went to the New York Music Awards. He went as Bootsy.
He proceeded to hang out with other celebs, music stars,
gets in, He parties with Lou Reed, he laughed with
Paul Simon, he posed with ll Coolja. Yes, there was
another enclosed encounter with this same almost Bootsy in a
hotel in Manhattan. A bass player who knew Bootsy heard
(37:57):
his friend was in the hotel. So he comes over
to the law and he's like, and he sees Bootsy
because you're gonna see Bootsy and Apel lobby, right, So
he goes over to him and he's like, and I quote,
I knew what Bootsy looked like. I see it all
the interviews and had the poaches on my wall as
a kid. He's staying in the same hotel as Miles.
I was like, God, damn it, it's him. It's got
to be him. So he goes over to him, right,
he tries to speak to Bootsy and he sits his hero,
(38:19):
and his hero is acting funny, not quite like Bootsy.
This almost Bootsy is like trying to like, oh, is
there a bathroom around here? Right? So he tries to
like slip away, and he manages to get out right.
But that's not the end of this story, because that
same almost Bootsy tried to like cad your ride with
the young bass player and his band. He did get
in the van with him and rode with them all
(38:40):
the way from New York to Washington, d C. So
I'm thinking, this is our Washington d C. Almost boots.
They get to d C, the almost Bootsy and the
young musicians, they hang out. They're like, hey, he's like, oh,
what where are y'all staying? Right? So maybe didn't notice
it at first because there's so stoke that Bootsy wants
to chill with them, They're like, oh my god, he's
still wants to hang This is dope. So time passes though,
(39:02):
they're like, hey, darting to divvy up beds or whatever,
and people are like, hey, Bootsy, you're gonna go to
get your own adort? Should we call you a cab?
The keyboardist in the band, who also meanwhile hero worship Bootsy,
he recalled how and I quote, I'm thinking, here's this
established famous musician, what's he doing hanging with us? Why
aren't we going out to a proper dinner and then
saying goodbye? Like normal, if you ran into one of
(39:24):
your heroes, you'd hang out. Who wouldn't turn into a
twenty four to seven thing? This almost Bootsy much time
with the hero exactly? Dude? Do you never want to
meet your heroes, especially when they're not really them, like
a fake one of your heroes? Even once? Yeah, so
this almost Bootsy. He wants to talk, of course, industry gossip,
so he starts running down people. He wants a dish
about how James Brown screwed him and George Clinton screwed him.
(39:47):
Then he asked this young band, oh, do you guys
have a little cash for Bootsy? And then of course
he disappears, never to be seen again. Yeah, smash cut Annah.
I'm California at the Annual Music Convention, which is a
national association of music merchants. Yeah, there's a guy there
who damn sure look like Bootsy. But not only that,
he's telling everyone he's Bootsy. So he's going around this
(40:09):
convention of music basically people selling guitars and basses and drums.
So this friend of Bootsy's who is there at NOM.
Here's the people shouting, Oh, Boots, he's here, Boots, He's
over there. I just saw a Bootsy. He's like, oh,
I didn't know Bootsy was in Anahem. I thought he
was back in Cincinnati. So, as the friend tells it,
I would say, what are you talking about. He's in Cincinnati,
he was here five minutes ago. So the friend tries
(40:32):
looking all around this Noom and he never catches up
to the almost Bootsy, but he did find the trail
of fraud that the almost BOUTSI left bey, Yes, this
fake funketeer got away with about ten thousand dollars worth
of even as guitars. Yeah, he had them. He arranged
for them to be sent to a po box in Louisiana.
There were also invoices from Limo companies. And then y
(40:55):
Bootsy's wife finally hears about this one. She's pissed again.
She tells the story, quote, he got away with a lot,
from what I'm told, thousands and thousands of dollars negative energy.
It was very disheartening. Yeah, So despite what his wife said,
Bootsy still remained a little amused by all the crime
and hijinks to being done in his name. One former collaborator,
he was telling the story to Rolling Stone. He said, quote,
(41:17):
we used to talk about that constantly, and every day
someone to say we heard he was in this place,
so he was here, and Boots he was always smiling
about it. And then when everyone found out that guy
was pulling a lot of endorsements, meaning he was getting
a lot of gear, everyone was sinking, Well, maybe that's
not cool because he couldn't sell that stuff. I don't
know why that's the line. He could sell that stuff,
like we don't want him profiting off being almost Bootsy.
(41:38):
So this same New York based Washington d C Corridor
Almost Bootsy, Yeah, he would continue to contribute to the
growing legend of the almost Bootsies around the country. One time,
another friend of Bootsies was in New York City and
the friend was convinced, or rather conned by Almost Bootsy.
This guy was that good, This guy actually knew Bootsy
(41:58):
hanging out with him.
Speaker 4 (41:59):
Oh, you're kidding.
Speaker 3 (42:00):
The musician, this guy, Freddy Perez, said, quote, you couldn't
tell the difference in his appearance and the way he spoke.
He used the same words Bootsy used, even the sound
of his voice everything. It was wazing. So since he
was convinced, and since he was a musician, Perez was like, hey,
Bootsy man, why don't you get up there and slap
your bass around? So, as he put it, I said,
(42:20):
I want to hear the funk. So the response was
he declined, very.
Speaker 2 (42:24):
Strange, ahead and decline.
Speaker 3 (42:26):
Yeah. What was stranger is while he was in DC,
this New York based Almost Bootsy did sit in with
a band. There's reports of him going up on stage
and sitting in, but he didn't play his bass. Instead,
he just sang because you know, everyone wants to hear
Bootsy sing. No one's like, hey, sit your bass down
for this one. Come on, Bootsy, give us those those
(42:47):
velvety tones. You know, what do you know of the
American songbook. So this same almost Bootsy he continues rampaging
up and down the Eastern Seaboard, hopping in vans with
young bands, playing shows as a singer. So finally the
real Bootsies team has to spring into like legal action. Yeah,
and they tried to put the kaibosh on this almost Bootsy.
(43:09):
So this is what the basically the point, This almost
Bootsy goes to the mattresses right like like they say,
and the Godfather. So now that they know it's a war,
so they're trying to get CAGI, so they try to
catch up to them in a New York and a
night spot. Almost Bootsy was there. He was celebrating the fans, right,
and then he's like he was sitting on a complimentary
champagne that he was getting from the management. The whole bit, right.
(43:30):
The DJ was there playing his new song because boots
he had a new song out, and it's just like
in this dance club, a couple of days later, an
executive calls that club and it's like, hey, how's Bootsy's
new song? Doing DJ's like, I got the craziest news
Bootsy was in the club, and the labels X like what, Yeah,
that's impossible. What are you talking about? Are you kidding?
So he calls Bootsy's wife. He's like, was Bootsy in
(43:51):
like whatever club? And she's like, no, he was in
a whole other stage. Yeah, exactly disconstantly is this Bootsy
the one eight hundred numbers she's got set up? So
the exact he calls back to the DJ, right, and
the DJ's like, well, I got that guy's number. I
got Bootsy's number because I asked him, right, he was exactly, Oh,
give it to me. I'd like to talk to Bootsy
(44:11):
and he's like, of course, right to DJ, he's now.
The exec gets the number from the DJ, slips it
to the authorities. The authorities like top up and they
call it up dead end. There was it was a
fake number he had slipped them. They're like, oh, yeah,
he's my number, right. So Bootsi's people at this point
they're really trying to like close their net on the
New York and Washington DC area, they find someone who
(44:33):
knows them or says they know him. They pass a
message like this is like back channel US Soviet nuclear negotiations. Right,
So they find somebody who says they know him. They're like, well,
give them this message. Meet us at this time. They
arrange a meeting. He shows up. Yes, one of Bootsy's
people is there, and they took it well, a couple
of people, and they took it very personally. What the
almost Bootsy had been up to. Yeah, right, as his
(44:54):
manager Ivy tells the story, the man from there was
another man there from Bootsy's team, this guy named Waller, right,
and so Bill Waller he goes medieval on this almost
Bootsy like he was. Ivy tells it. Bill was from
the old school, and I'll just say he used.
Speaker 4 (45:09):
Old school rules.
Speaker 3 (45:10):
Like Bill definitely wasn't Shug Night, but he wasn't anybody
you'd wanted to take lightly. So Yeah, there was some
talk later about getting the FBI involved. Rolling Stone even
submitted a Freedom of Information Act. I found a request
that they submitted one of their reports on this, and
the reporters were told by the FBI that the bureau
could quote, neither confirm nor deny the existence of such records,
(45:32):
So I'm going with the idea. There was some investigation
almost now, the reports of his appearances. They started to
calm down in the late eighties, they seemed to go away,
and then all of a sudden, nineteen ninety rolls around
Reggae Sunsplash festival in Jamaica, Elizabeth Bootsy gets spotted bringing
the funk to Reggae Sunsplash. Yeah. The next year there
(45:55):
were reports Bootsy was in la He was allegedly trying
to put on a benefit concert for veteran into the
First Gulf War. He contacted a British band called The Alarm,
and he tried to ye right, and so he tried
to coordinate their participation, and so they grew suspicious though
when he asked them to pay for his hotel room
and all his expenses, He's like, you could cover that
(46:17):
f a Bootsy right grocery. Meanwhile, the Internet is becoming
not quite common in nineteen ninety, so it existed, but
it was not like the band couldn't look him up. Yeah, exactly,
so they couldn't. They didn't know that d Light was
on tour and Bootsy Collins was with them playing the
groove is in the heart on international stages. They're like,
there's no way that's Bootsy trying to put together a
(46:39):
benefit concert for the veterans of the First Gulf War.
Speaker 4 (46:43):
The Alarm.
Speaker 3 (46:44):
The band they were suspicious about this concert, right, this benefit,
So they booted the almost Bootsy off their band bus
right and he leaves with his luggage. And my favorite
note is he also had with him a very large dog,
possibly a pet wolf. People in the b and could
not decide if it was a dogs. So was Van's
going around with luggage in a possibly Penny's that tight rolls.
(47:09):
So anyway, the band kicks this almost Bootsy off their bus.
He angrily yells at them, you will be hearing from
my lawyers. You will regret this, babies, Elizabeth, that was
not to occur. That was the last time ever heard
anyone ever heard from this guy. It was the last
time anyone ever seems to have heard from almost any
of the almost Bootsies. The trend passed on. So what's
(47:32):
that ridiculous takeaway here?
Speaker 2 (47:33):
I know, I thought it was interesting when you were
saying that Bootsy was like, I just want to play
the music.
Speaker 4 (47:38):
I didn't know what I was doing in terms of
the business.
Speaker 2 (47:40):
And that's you know what happens all the time. You
get musicians who they're not they're artistic souls, they're not
business minded folks, but yet it becomes a business. They're
they're not a businessman, they're a business man.
Speaker 3 (47:54):
Well said easy.
Speaker 2 (47:57):
So I just feel for them and I feel for
him because it's like, that's how they get taken advantage of.
Speaker 3 (48:01):
Okay, they want to focus on the Artaren.
Speaker 4 (48:03):
What's your ridiculous takeaway.
Speaker 3 (48:04):
That I have never been Bootsy Collins for Halloween?
Speaker 2 (48:08):
Oh? That is a crying shame, right, I mean.
Speaker 3 (48:10):
How did I miss this one? I've got a lot
of fun costumes here. I've got something to look forward to,
all right, Well, as we wash away all of the
funket's here? And yes, can I get a talkback produce
a d.
Speaker 6 (48:25):
Oh God?
Speaker 3 (48:31):
I love je.
Speaker 7 (48:36):
Saren Elizabeth? Can I just say how amazing you guys
are one of my favorite podcasts ever. I stumbled on
you back in the time when you did the Frank
Sinolfred Junior kidnapping story, and I literally almost wanted to
pitch my pants. It was so funny and so ridiculous
(48:57):
in these times. I have to say, I respect everything you've.
Speaker 4 (49:04):
Done in these times. Maybe I love making people pee themselves.
Speaker 3 (49:09):
Yes you do love that, Yes I do. I do well.
Speaker 4 (49:12):
I appreciate that sentiment from her that we do. We
need to we need to keep it loose these days, guys, we.
Speaker 3 (49:18):
All could use a laugh for oh well. As always.
You can find us online Ridiculous Crime on the social
media that's mostly Blue Sky and Instagram these days. From
what I understand from the interns, we also still have
Ridiculous Crime dot Com, our award winning website. I think
we are now up for a Michelin Award this year.
I'm very excited to see if our food will take
us over the line.
Speaker 4 (49:37):
That'd be amazing.
Speaker 3 (49:38):
Yeah, So email us if you'd like it at that
Ridiculous Crime at a gmail dot com and please start
the email dear producer d And also you can leave
us a talk back if you go to the iHeart app.
Obviously we love to hear from you, guys. Please leave
us a talkback and you may hear your voice here.
Thanks for listening. We will catch you next crime. Ridiculous
(50:03):
Crime is hosted by Elizabeth Dutton and Zarin Burnette, produced
and edited by her own Defunk all star Dave Conston
and starring Annelie's Rutgers. It You doth Research is by
Sequined top hat maker Marissa Brown and Star Shaped sunglass
collector Alex French. Our theme song is by our house
band James Blue and the RC's Thomas Lee and Travis Dutton.
(50:26):
The host wardrobe provided by Botany five hundred. Guest Harry,
makeup by Sparkleshot and mister Andre. Executive producers are boot
Zilla Truthers, Ben Bolmen and Noel Brown.
Speaker 4 (50:45):
Why Say It One More Time?
Speaker 7 (50:48):
Crime?
Speaker 1 (50:49):
Ridiculous Crime is a production of iHeartRadio four more podcasts.
My heart Radio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or
wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Hosts And Creators
Zaron Burnett
Elizabeth Dutton
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