Let’s Look Back at Anger: the Battlin’ Gallagher Brothers of Oasis

Oasis was “the biggest band in the world.” Meanwhile, Liam and Noel Gallagher — the brothers who were the heart of the band — despised each other. This gave the band a creative tension. And it made their crimes against each other… ridiculous.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Ridiculous Crime is a production of iHeartRadio. Elizabeth Saren. I
got a question for you. Yep, do you know what
is ridiculous? Now? Okay, because I do well, I actually do. Oh,
I was just kidding. I like sandwiches. I just want
to put that out. That's not ridiculous, like an Italian

(00:22):
Deli sandwich, that's right. Particularly, And I like a good
I like a good handbag, a pocketbook. I like a
good stylish pocket. Yeah you did so. Um as experts
in all things bread, Panera decide, I'm just reading from
their website decided to step up to the plate to

(00:45):
create a baguette bag. Bag. Bag is in all caps.
I'm with it designed in a way that it really
should be stylish on the outside and perfect to pair
with our toasted baggetts. So it's a it's a well venture.
It's a foot long bag that you can fit one
of their sandwiches in. So someone's driving to work and

(01:06):
they're like, just like, oh, I got this big meeting
and they don't have like they haven't done their job right.
They're like, I don't have a pitch, And all of
a sudden they realize, wait, I had Panari yesterday bag
bag at exactly. That's all the work that goes into
these things high. It's like literally one totally. It looks
it looks like one of those like late nineties early

(01:26):
auts Fendi bags, like a little clutch. It's green, but
more power to it. It's made out of a luxurious
pebbled polyurethane exterior. Find these things my dominions. No, friend
of the show Solid Dad on Instagram she sent it
to us. Thank you. No, she's awesome. Um so yeah,

(01:46):
it's I mean it holds a twelve venture but it's
really fourteen inches long. I'm really holding my tongue right now.
And then like you know, you're running, you're running to
catch the subway and you're busy on the go, New
York lifestyle, and then you trip and instead of like
you instead of your compact and like some tampons and
change spilling all over the sidewalker' just your big twelve

(02:08):
incher just rolls up. All of the Yorkers are just
looking at me like, is that your twelve inches sir?
Yes it is, And it's picking up the shredded lettuce
off the sidewalk to shove it back in the sandwich. Yeah,
guess what, that's ridiculous. That is definitely, oh man, Elizabeth, Yes,

(02:28):
if you don't mind just taking a second with me, Okay,
I've got one for you. Yes, okay, it has nothing
to do with sandwiches. Oh that's a shame. But Elizabeth,
you're not an Oasis fan, right. It's not that I
love a good desert Oasis, not that I don't. It's
not that I dislike them, but I'm not like but
you know the guy to see him in concert? Yeah, yeah,

(02:49):
but you know the song talking like Wonderwall, Champaigns, Supernova,
Don't Look Back in Anger. Yeah, you're familiar with the
hits yea. When I lived in Scotland, Don't Look Back
in Anger as a favorite pub song. And then if
people were walking home from the pub in the middle
of the night drunk, they like to catterwall it down
the road. So you've heard that song, yes, a lot? Yes, okay,

(03:10):
they'll see you'll love this episode that it's about. The
band was once, as you know, the biggest band in
the world, and it was led by the battling brothers,
Liam and Noel Gallagher. Yes, and oh man, did they
hate each other? Just hate each other, which naturally led
to all sorts of ridiculous crimes. And that's what we're
here for. Yeah, so don't look back in anger, I

(03:34):
heard me say, because we're gonna take a gander back
for some laughs. Nice. This is Ridiculous Crime, a podcast

(04:00):
about absurd and outrageous capers. Heis and cons it's always
ninety nine percent murder free and one hundred percent ridiculous. Elizabeth,
I brought you here today to talk about Oasis, Okay,
I'm sorry. I think it'll be fun because you know,
it's easy to make fun of. Like, oh, they did

(04:22):
a knockoff beatle derived sound like they want to sound
like John Lennon. We're not going to do those jobs, okay, right,
And yes they had super catchy pop song lyrics, but
that wasn't the key to their magic. What I want
to talk to you know, Like, yes, okay, big brother Noel,
he wrote the songs, Liam sang. That's great, that magic
is there. I'm totally with that. But the real magic

(04:43):
is the Gallagher brothers hatred of each other. Yeah, that's
what made that band goes. It goes beyond sibling rivalry.
Oh no, they flat out despised each other. They both
got some serious eyebrows, right, oh yeah, yeah, like those
caveman It's like, yeah, like there's like three eyebrowsers, one
in the middle and two on the sides. So try
brow exactly. Well, the Gallagher brothers, they were, you know,

(05:07):
cocaine fueled self important rock stars and that was key
to their act. So that was also key to all
the ridiculous crimes we're going to get into. Okay, So yeah,
now you were, as you said, you've been in Scotland,
so you were there, but you weren't there for the
nineties cool Britannia moment. No, yeah, right, you were here
over in the States. You're right. Now, what do you
remember at that moment? Like you would you have to

(05:30):
say favorite bands? Did you like Blur? Did you like
the Verb? Did you like like the Verve? I like them,
They're pretty good. Would you agree with the statement that
Oasis was key to this moment and they were the
biggest band? Yeah, and I never really understood why they
were the biggest band in the world, but you know,
go off, well, I would say that the fact that

(05:51):
they were the biggest band in the world, other than
the fact that They sounded like a new Beatle some
people like that, and they had the swagger before like
America got back on its dirtbag energy. You know, they
were in the mid nineties, right before America got to
you know, that sleeves bag energy of the early aughts,
right that New York scene. Right before that, you have
the shag headed brit Boys out there doing their best

(06:13):
impression of being like, you know, mess about last exactly
all right, okay, But the reason why I think they
were the biggest band was it was the last of
the pre Internet age. You just literally could not do
what they did then. I could not do that now,
and they were the last one. It just happened to
be time. Yeah, and then then all of a sudden,
the Internet breaks right when they you know, are fading,

(06:34):
so it doesn't really matter. And then, you know, our
modern celebrity culture, we know too much about everybody now, right,
there was a little not a mystery, but you didn't
expect to know about as much of these bands as
we learned about the Gallaghris because they were always getting embusted, right,
or giving terrible interviews or cursing each other out on TV,
which is awesome, right, So in short, it was a
different time. It was right, just a different time, Elizabeth now.

(06:56):
But just you know, to give us some context on
the battling Gallagherris before we get into them, consider this
an appetizer, Okay, okay, the there's a story. This is
just an example of their contentious relationship. The band was
recording their album be Here Now, which was like their
third album with the follow up to their big What's
Up or What's Your Story? Morning Glory? What's up? Morning,

(07:17):
Morning Glory? Where you ben? Girl? Anyway, the year is
nineteen ninety six, so the now they're doing like a
romping here now girl. Okay, get over your girl. Wait cocaine.
It's rom dosp with cocaine. So no, he's deciding, you know,
I'm gonna mess with my brother. So while they're recording
this album, they well it's easy because Liam, the younger

(07:38):
brother is out of his gazebo on drugs. He's just
like he's fallen into yeah the singer boy. Yeah. So
they're at this place called the Farm in Chiddingfold, Surrey,
which is in England, and it was a legit farm, right,
barnyard everything right. The frontman, little brother Liam the singer dude.
He is convinced that the farm animals are spying on

(07:58):
him and the band, but mostly on him. Yeah, he
thinks some of the barnyard animals have cameras and recording
equipment on them. They did. This is just how high
he is. He convinced that barnyard animals were secretly recording
wherever he goes. So his brother, what does Noel decide
to do? He's like, well, I can't play with that leverage, right,
So he's basically here's a quote from Noel. He's like,

(08:19):
because it's on a farm, there's lots of farm people
knocking around, we'd always be suspiciously looking out their window,
admittedly high as a kite, thinking sheep's got a camera.
Don't like the look of that pig. Oh yeah, exactly there.
That's just like how they all are. But Liam takes
it the furthest So Noel decides, I'm gonna kick in
on the fact that, being his older brother, I know
he's scared of ghosts. So he then starts breaking into

(08:42):
his hotel room when he's not there and like moving
the furniture around or trying to convince him that ghosts
are messing with him, right, So he's like, quote, we
convinced him his bedroom was haunted. So when he get
up in the morning and go to have his breakfast,
someone would go in and turn the pictures back to
front or move a lamp beside his bed across the
other side of the room. He'd arrived, Pale, have you
been in my room? No? Why you've been in my room?

(09:04):
Because now the lamp is in the toilet? No way? Wow?
So oh yeah. So to help further explain this brother
of the dynamic, you have to understand Liam is the
baby of the family, all right, you know what that means.
You're a big sister. Noel, though, is the middle brother.
Now you and I both have one sibling. We don't
know that middle child dynamic. Usually they're the problem child, right.

(09:27):
So now you have a baby child and a problem
child in the same family, and they're the Gallagher brothers.
Poor missus Gallagher. No but a lucky lass she was anyway.
So they make it work, right, because the sibling rivalry
just not only dominates their lives, but it ends up
dominating their band. Okay, let's get to the band itself. Yeah,
band requires a little bit of a backstory, right, Yeah,

(09:47):
it goes like this. At some point back in their
school days, Liam had music smashed into his head, like literally,
music smashed into his head. Okay, I'll explain. Apparently he
was the cock of the walk at his school, really
like you know, just that guy. And according to the
third Gallagher brother, Paul, there was some rival school kids
who came by the school one day. And here's Liam's

(10:08):
recollection of it. We stood there having a sig. I
remember all these lads coming down. This kid pulled out
this little hammer and he went whack on my head,
blood everywhere. Right, So, yeah, he gets hit in the
head with a hammer by rival school kids. Lovely for him.
He's a hard headed little lad. So he takes the
hammer blow and keeps right on, liaming around, right, It
doesn't stop him at all. But there's something different about

(10:31):
him ever since he get hit in the head with
a hammer. Right, He says, from that day on. I
know it sounds stupid, but it was as if something
had clicked, you know what I mean. I started hearing
music started making sense, you know what I mean. So,
so whoever, he was, thank you, right, So, so there
was something loosening. He knocked it into place, apparently. So
he starts hearing music, starts hearing songs right, and as

(10:53):
Noel his older brother said, somebody hammered the music into him.
He's got a lot to answer full, hasn't he. So
after his hammer attack, Liam becomes obsessed with music. He
has to be in a band. That's all he can
think about. The hammer knocked music into it. I'm sad
they didn't call the band hammer attack exactly hammer strike,
So so it has to be one of the most

(11:14):
surprising answers to why did you become a musician? Usually
it's like, oh, I wanted to meet girls, I wanted
to meet boys. I wanted to get out of my
crappy hometown. It's like I got hit in the head
with a hammer. Anyway, So Liam starts putting together a band.
He gets these two cats, you know, this dude named
Bonehead and then Gwiggsy right Gigs are his bandmates. They
join up and the reason will be good musicians. And

(11:34):
at this point, though there's no null in Oasis, we're
in nineteen ninety one, okay, Noel at this point is
a roadie and road manager for some band called in Spiral, carpets.
Oh right, I know that is okay. So they're tour
in America, Japan, South America and he thinks this is it.
I'm living life. I can't believe I get paid to
travel and just you know, f around the world. Right,

(11:55):
this is the life. And he thinks like this is
my future rock music, This is everything. And then band
fires him. So he's like, pay so much for that?
So then what did you do? What did he do
to get fired as a ROADI get this. He was
an unapproachable jerk. Oh he was aloof he was an
old Gallagher. Yeah, he was a bit of a I
can't say it. So anyway, he goes back home to Manchester.

(12:17):
Liam goes, hey, big brother got this band. You need
to come down and play with us. And he's like, nah,
your little brother piss off, right, And then he's like, no,
come on, come around, you know, come around. Well, you
gotta play with us eventually, and I was like, all right,
let me go see your new band. He goes down,
he likes him, he sits in with him, plays, then
he goes back for a second time and little brother,
being a little brother, he knows how to play and
he's like Hey, that one song you were playing for me,

(12:39):
Let's play it. And so he plays it and then
he can hear them playing his song. Oh man, Now
now he's an Oasis. So that's how he gets into
the band. And then a couple of years pass. Nothing happens, right,
People always act like Nold joined the band and then boom,
all of a sudden takes off. Nope, that's not true,
and yeah we'll point that out. Anyway, the band plays
gigs around the UK. There's still at Manchester. Finally, after

(13:01):
gigging for a couple of years, they get the attention
of a music label. Now I didn't know this one
because I don't know you know labels. But anyway, Alan
McGee head of the coolest band label the Time Creation Records.
They're all stoked. He comes to a gig of there's
in Glasgow, Glasgow, Glasgow, Glasgow, Glasgow. There we go there
it is Glasgow. So they go. They're up in Glasgow, Scotland,

(13:22):
and they go to play this gig and here's the
record label head comes down and there's like seven people
at this gig and he's as Leam puts it, two
of them right. So the guy is there loves it
signs them right. So now boom they go and they
record an album. This is the one called definitely maybe
their first album. That's the years now, nineteen ninety four. Okay,

(13:44):
the band breaks big in Britain. They have this hit
song Supersonic. People are into them. Have another song rock Star.
They're like, oh, this band's like they capture a moment, right.
All the young people are like, I want to go
do drugs and listen to them. Didn't get whiny? Yeah exactly.
And also they they're like this revival full of this
British attitude that I don't think we we know it
really well, we don't take we don't take the national

(14:06):
pride that comes along with it. So think of the
rock and roll attitude of like the Stones, like Zeppelin
and the Who, the sex Pistols. Yeah, all comes Oasis
and they're like, we haven't had this and forever because
like this wasn't an energy of like new way of music.
This was an energy of pop music or you know
the hair metal bands. They were brash, but not quite

(14:26):
for the English like finally we got somebody. So they
immediately love it and Oasis plays into it on their
first tour, they get banned from a whole chain of hotels.
Oh boy, like a whole chain. Yeah, the dude Bonehead
in exactly your favorite band made a Bonehead he says,
Oh yeah, wait, Bonehead went from Noel's original band. No

(14:47):
no Liam's original band. So Liam starts the band and
then he brings Noel in. Okay, Gwiggsy, but there's a
drummer too. We don't need to get into the case.
Who knows, so Bonehead says, do you remember one hotel
where a whole bedroom went out the window? Mattress pillows
everything if it moves, fling it foof Right, So that

(15:08):
was their attitude. Liam was usually the ringleader of these things.
He was the instigator. He offered um, usually an insufficient
defense for his actions, such as this one which he
and I quote you can't ask a twenty one year
old lad to be professional. It's like, I don't even
understand that word. What do you want about? Guess what? Yeah,
you can ask him to be professional now, big brother

(15:31):
and Noel he was the more responsible lad, but he
still takes his brother's side when it comes to like
causing havoc and mayhem. Right, So Noel he says, quote,
although we argue and we hate each other and all that,
because we're brothers. He sings supersonic and he means it
because I meant it. It's about passion, brothers, man, family,
feeling supersonic. Yeah exactly, I don't. I don't know the

(15:56):
line and the song feeling, Yeah, exactly, you nailed it.
I knew you would notice I do. So. Anyway, the
band soldiers on. Liam just continues making messages. Noel pretends
not to see them, and that's their m O, right,
and then occasionally he'll badmouth his brother in the press,
and then that's how he vents, right, So he does
as always with this John lennonist glee. You know, he's

(16:16):
really good at giving cutting. Yeah. I really kind of
enjoyed researching this one for that. Anyway, So the band's
internal tensions at this point, they go from a simmer
to this low rocking boil. Right. Meanwhile, they're booked for
a gig in Amsterdam. It's their first international gig. It's
in support of the Verve al right, So let's take
a bull break and then I'll tell you all about

(16:37):
their first international gig and how it goes. Absolutely sideways.

(17:00):
All right, Elizabeth, I told you that we would have
oasis and take us on an international voyage that would
go absolutely tits up. Okay, right, yes, that's I'm using
British slang. Yes, I learned a bunch of these things. Okay,
So the Band's Road to Amsterdam, this story could be
an indie movie, like it literally just by its in
and of itself, could be an indie movie. You got
like a young Danny Boyle, you know, the director of Trainspoty,

(17:23):
and you gave him this story, he'd make a hit
film like that's this anyway, So I'll let Noel Gallagher
set the stage. Yes, so this guy picked us up
in a van and he's going to be our roadie,
Jason Rhodes. I said to him, all right, nice to
meet you. Forget that. Did they give you a float?
Now this is going to require some translation all these stories. Yeah,
so a float is British for an advance or petty cash. Okay,

(17:44):
so they float you some money exactly. So the roadie
named Rhodes who tells Noel that the float is for petrol,
and petrol is British for gas. Correct. Okay, So Noel
isn't hearing this, He tells the ROADI quote, I said,
never mind petrol. We took the float off him and
then spent about an We're driving around Manchester getting drugs
and then set off. So they decide, okay, now they're set.

(18:05):
They got like, you know, maybe a fifth of the
gas money left, and they got a pocket full of
drugs and a van load of British musicians and they're
ready to go international. Okay, so they get on a
ferry over to the continent of the UK. And uh,
I do love that they choose to get drugs before
going to Amsterdam. People they go get their drugs in
the want to do it before. Well, first of all,

(18:26):
you want to do it before you go through any
kind of passport exactly, and inside the van and next
on the ferry. Next you want to go to Amsterdam,
which they don't have drugs there. No, No, that's not
somewhere where you would get drugs literally. So we'll let
Liam pick up the story. Get on the ferry. I
don't know how we get on the ferry because we're pissed,

(18:46):
no pissed as British more being stoned or super drunk
or in their case both, which is like wicked Pissa.
So back to Noel. Now Noel takes off the story again.
We get on this ferry. As fate would have it,
there's a load of west Ham fans on this overnight ferry.
It's got a casino on nightclub, so west Ham being
the soccer club. So they're basically now with a bunch

(19:06):
of hooligan lads on a casino with plenty of liquors.
This faery is already basically a tinder pile. Man just
is waiting for a spark, and now we've got basically
the gasoline Gallagher brothers. How long is the ferry trip?
I don't know. It was an overnight ferry, Yeah, so
like imagining six eight hours something like, it's longer than that,
maybe longer. I don't know. I did not look into

(19:26):
the itinerary how long I apologize. We'll just say it's
a let's let's round up fifty eight hours, eight hours exactly.
So the band's like, we have fifty eight hours to go.
So they started knocking, probably like seventeen, maybe fifty, I
don't know, twelve, I don't know. I took a it
could be any number between from a from Dover to Calais,

(19:47):
and it was only a couple of hours. And so
they're going to Amsterdam, which is not terribly Let's say
it's anywhere between one hour and one hundred. Okay, so
like eighty hours to go take eight hours. The band
starts knocking back flutes a champagne. They chase this with
Jack Daniels slammers, slammers. That's just Jack Daniels on rocks
in a glass. Okay, throw it back, you don't sip it.

(20:08):
It's basically a chilled shot. So okay, that's what I found. Anyway.
Mark Coyle the band manager and sound guy, he's along
for the ride, and we'll turn to him for the
suppart of the story. The next thing is that sporadic
fighting is breaking out all around us. Remember the west
Ham fans. Okay, Liam is very excited by the prospects
of a lot of chaos going on, and he goes

(20:29):
and joins in. You can see him running through the
windows along the deck. He's having a great time. He
looks like he's in a school playground chasing leaves, all right.
So he's like, I'm feeling super sun. Little legs run
past them, so somewhere in all this cass Liam doubles
back from outside the ship back inside to the casino

(20:51):
area and he pulls off like his Jesus Christ superstar,
starts flipping tables but I'm want to say table, I
mean the roulette tables. Oh so, now it's raining, casinos,
absolute chaos, and you got this Liam giddy as a
god of mischief, bouncing through it all. And as Liam recalled,
then there's a fight broke out and I'll remember was
it was a bit Benny Hill. So now he is

(21:14):
in the middle of it, right, So the band sound
guy next spots lee, I'm after he's been running around
outside and then the casino chips in the air and
Benny Hill music is playing, and he's like, he's still running,
but he's got a policeman running after him. So now
the cops are on him, right, and he's pissed. Remember
he's absolutely sideways, so he's easily caught by the police. Yeah,
they arrest him and then they take him down to
the ship's brig which is the bottom of the boat.

(21:35):
The cops were like, that's not good enough. They go
back and they arrest the rest of the band. They
go you're with him, So they go him, they take everybody.
The sound guy's hiding, the roadies hiding so that they're
trying not to get arrested. But the band, drunk as
they are sideways, they are easy grab. So now the
band looks like they're about to self destruct before they
even get to their first big gig. This is the

(21:56):
magic of the battle in Gallaghers. Right. Okay, So we're
now between England and Amsterdam and they're in jail. Okay, right.
The next day, after the casino boat fight and all
around melee and chaos occurs, the roadie has to go
find the band. So he doesn't know what to do,
so he goes to when the boat docks, he goes
to customs. He's like, hey, have you seen a band
come through here? So yeah, he finally locates them and

(22:20):
someone's like, oh, yeah, they're arrested. You gotta go talk
to these people. He finds out that the boat just
handed them over to European customs officials. The European customsucials like,
get the hell with these people, put them back on
the boat said send them back to the UK. Well,
the band didn't have any money because they spend it
all on drugs. Right, So the customs ficials are like,
you're you're broke here, drunk, messed up, go back home.

(22:42):
In the UK, They're like, we don't want any of
this lattish here behavior here. So now the road, he
has to call the label president and tell them that
the first big international gig is a total bust because
the band is on their way back in Cancuffs feeling superslonic.
So he calls up McGee and McGhee is Scottish. Right,
I'll just say that the news did not hit his

(23:03):
ears well, and he then responded with a string of
cusswords with a couple question marks punctuating the cusswords. Right.
So anyway, but when Noel tells the story, because Noel
eventually gets out of custody, he calls McGee to give
him the bad news. And he's not the roadie, he's
the star of the band. So McGhee, this is all
Noel tells it. I called McGhee and I'll never forget this.
This is another reason why I love Meghee. I said,

(23:24):
are you sitting down, I've got some news. Everybody's been arrested.
The only word he said was brilliant. He realizes, why
is it brilliant? Because he knows the band's name is
now made. Oh yeah, I hear all the papers, free
publicity all around. The British press goes gaga for this
bad boy boy band Roger star reputation establish exactly so

(23:46):
they are now the most dangerous British lads since Sid
Vicious went over. Right, Well, you know we're not accounting
Lemmy motor hand. There's a lot of people who are
care but in the mythos right anyway, So after their
casino wrecking fairy brawl with cops in west Ham hooligans,
Oasis enjoys its new fame and the Gallagher brothers relish
all the attention, and one of them loves having a

(24:07):
reputation for having the sort of balls that British bands
didn't have during that new wave error I talked about, right,
and that's obviously is Liam. But the the other one, no,
it starts to bother him, right, and just this tension
eats at him. But Liam doesn't care. He's like, that's
how I want my rock and roll stars to act,
stick up for themselves, get in a bit of shenanigans
and that's it. We live to fight another day. To me,

(24:29):
it felt right. So he's just all about it. So
at one point the British press they start keying in
on this tension between Noel and Liam. So they're like, hey,
what's it like being a brothers in a band? This
one TV presenter asked him, right, the interviewer really wants
to know, like how often you guys fight? Yea. So
the brothers can barely contain their animus. It's just ripping

(24:49):
through their eye. They're shooting mean looks at each other
all the time and stuffings, like they look when one
goes to answer a question, the other one just starts laughing.
You know. It's just getting bad, right. So Liam starts
to answer, Noel calls him out on it because you
can't answer anyway. They get down to it. Liam's side,
it's like, oh, okay, all we got to do is
look at each other in a certain kind of way
when we row, without even opening our mobs, we just

(25:11):
we're just like going gar in our head, you know
what I mean. So they just absolutely have a fury
burning in each other. It's just the sight of the
other can make them like, I don't understand how you
stay in a band like exactly, it doesn't make sense.
You want to tour the world with a person you hate,
a bus with a person you hate. Oh yeah, yeah,

(25:32):
there's that too. There is that. So the as one
family friend put it, I thought, this is a good perspective.
She said, Noel has a lot of buttons. Liam has
a lot of fingers. It's as simple as that. Really,
that's a really good way to put it. Yeah, So
if you dig into the battling Gallaghers, which I did,
you'll hear a story about how their rivalry started. And
Liam credits this for everything Noel doesn't. But anyway, apparently

(25:55):
the rivalry began when they shared a room as kids. Natural. Yeah,
you didn't share a room with your brother, right for
a little bit? Yeah, did you guys have your attention
about that? No? In fact, we would. My mom would
get all mad because she would tell us to go
to bed, and then she'd hear us like absolutely cracking
up and laughing. And then we had this thing where
we had these two twin beds and we would jump

(26:16):
one from the other and high five in the middle,
and we did it over and over, and then we
broke one of the beds and they're like, my mom
and my grand were like, well, you gotta sleep on it.
You want to do that to it? So it was
all so, you guys are the anti Gallagher brothers pretty much. Yea.
So when they shared a bed or bedroom rather, it
didn't go that well, let's just run it that way.
Apparently Noel had bought this stereo for himself. And these

(26:38):
guys grew up council estates lads right, like real poor
public housing. They didn't have much money. Their mom was
a single mother. So this stereo is a major purchase
for Noel. Sure, and he loves music. Remember he's the
brother who loves music. No, No, that's Liam. Liam get
hit in the head, music gets knocked into him. No,
always loves music. Oh exactly. The lead singer is the
one gets hit in the head. The songwriter guitarist is

(27:01):
the one who's like, music is his life. Got it?
Got it? Okay? So Liam comes home drunk and he's
like a teenager and he can't find the light switch.
So what does he do. He just urinates all over
his big brother's new stereo. Oh that's what that looks
like a toilet Naturally, so Liam says, and I quote,
I think it basically boils down to that he's held
that grudge. So he's convinced that his brother's mad because

(27:22):
he urinated on I think it's probably more than that
us guess and Liam, you may want to dig deeper
old hammer strike. So anyway, has fame takes hold of
them and they go on the road. As you pointed out,
they are, you know, hateful, but having spent a lot
of time next to each other, with each other and
it makes no sense, and they go to America like this,
and so now they want to really impress everybody. So
they're playing shows all across America. And what happens they

(27:44):
cross paths with Crystal Meth. Oh no, perfect right, because
I will say that there is sibling arguments are different
than arguments between other people because it just sort of
comes and goes. And he can Yeah, you expect them
to be in your life exactly, and so you can't
can't reach a point where you no longer brothers and

(28:06):
sisters who they snapped that bridge. Yeah, anyway, as no'll
recall them meeting Crystal Meth on the road in America. Quote,
someone had discovered the joys of crystal meth, which is
effectively like ninja speed. It's not even fun, you know
what I mean. It's a it's a horrible drug. Oh boy.
So it's yeah, it gets better because at first they
don't know it's meth. They're convinced it's cocaine. So they're

(28:28):
snorting rails of meth. Oh no. Yeah. So they're staying
up for days at a time wondering how do you
get to such strong cocaine in America? So their meth
to the guilt and they get to La and they're
gonna play the Whiskey a go go as like a
big showcase and this is their their their second big
international gig if you will, right there next time on

(28:50):
the Grand stage. And what happens. They show up meth
to the gills and having spent the night up right
their highest draft eyebrows. Okay, so Liam starts singing and
his teeth just fallout much that his plays the worst
show they've ever put onf on record, right, it's a
total embarrassment. They start out play all playing different songs
because they have different yes, so that's how it starts.

(29:13):
And then they goa let's start again, you guys super
Sonic on three, Like we are feeling so super sonic
right now? You guys, Now, who do you think Noel
Gallagher blames? Oh? And who do you think Liam Gallagher blames?
I wish no no blames, of course. So what happens
At some point in the gig, Liam gets a little

(29:33):
pissed and he rears back and he chucks his tambourine
at his brother on stage, just hits him in the
head with the tambourine. Now, can I just say that
like the least tough thing in the world to throw
a tambourine. Remember I was telling you about how Nold
can have cutting remarks. You're ready now Nol tells it best,
in my opinion, He says, not like a Bruce Lee

(29:54):
throwing star or a lightsaber. It was a tambourine. But
when it hit me on the shoulder, he went out
of time. I might add that the thing was sounded it,
so yes, it's perfect. Apparently Liam had been ducking behind
an app during the show and distorting rails of crystal

(30:14):
meth during the show. You know, meth is not known
as a singer's drug the road. He Jason Rhodes he
put it, that's gonna go tits up, isn't it? Yeah?
So how's he like singing through like his teeth graining together,
like going sideways, like just chewing rocks. Anyway, So, after

(30:34):
this disaster of a Methfield show at the in La,
in front of all the industry big wigs and everybody,
Noble isn't super embarrassed because remember he takes music seriously, right,
He goes back to the hotel. He asked the tour
manager for the float, you know, the petty cash. This
time he doesn't go buy street drugs in La. Instead,
he grabs his passport and the seven hundred bucks he
catches off the manager, right, and then he leaves his

(30:56):
brother this note, and Liam recalls this moment. I remember
he left me some soppy note coming through the door,
saying like how can we go on? Like brothers? It
was like, oh, right off. So that got rolled up,
and then another line of crystal methmun up the old
tubula bells. So he takes his brother's sentimental note. He
snorts crystal meth. He's so yeah anyway, No, like the dinosaurs,

(31:22):
when the meteor hit, he disappears, He's gone he's out
of it right. Tour manager freaks out because if they're
in LA, they're at the top of the tour. Everything
is going wrong. But she's a pro, she's smart, she
doesn't lose her head. Her freak out doesn't last long.
She goes to the hotel. She's like, wait, print up
Noel's phone records because remember this is pre cell phone,
so he's been using the hotel phone for all this communication.

(31:42):
So she looks at all the numbers he called. She
spots one number it sticks out. It's a number in
San Francisco. She's like four and five that's a San
Francisco area code. So the band had just been in
San Francisco prior to LA and Noland hooked up with
some woman in the Bay. So apparently he flew back
to his hook up. Yeah, and the tour manager she's
like me, she bets on sex. She's like, that's where
he went, and she was right, that's where he went.

(32:04):
So they phoned the number and they're convinced Nola's up
there because the girl's like, I don't know where he is.
You're like, we're gonna have to call the police because
he's a missing person. She's like, oh well, oh shoot.
So they're like, okay, he's there, right. So anyway, Noel's
hiding out in San Francisco, and while he's there, he
writes this new song called talk Tonight, Right and Talk
Tonight about his time with this girl. And the song

(32:26):
has lines like I want to talk tonight about how
you saved my life. You and me see how we
are right. I'm doing a terrible job right And there's
no melody at all what I saying. But you're probably
helping it. No, no, no, he would hate to hear
that when I just did this song. Anyway, Noel's version
of events is for this song. I remember, he writes
the song about this girl saves his life, and here's

(32:47):
how he describes this moment. I kind of sat in
this girl's flat, probably doing too many drugs and being
a bit mad. Unbeknown to me, they found out. This
is where he thinks he is. If I close my
eyes now, I can't even picture the girl. I can't
remember her name. It's a bit of a blur, but
she saved my life exactly. He's gonna go and sing
a song about her for years part dude, Well, no,

(33:11):
she got up, she got up queen. Yeah. So, after
he writes his hit song about this name, this girl
who saved his life while they did meth in her
apartment in San Francisco, No contacts Oasis and lets him
know I'm not quinning the band guys, and so you
goes any because like, I can't quit rock stardom. So
I wish I knew how to get exactly. I want
to know who this lady is too. I'm gonna do

(33:32):
some special investigator. I think you could find it. I
probably could. We'll take a little break and then I'll
get back with you with the madness that is only
going to ratch it up. Oh no, all right, Elizabeth.

(34:01):
We're now in January nineteen ninety five. Yes, do you
remember it? Yes? Okay, it's about to get sideways, so
just hold onto your memories, okay. Because the band Oasis
is busy recording their big smash it album, What's Up,
Morning Glory? What's the Story? Morning Glory? So story girl,
Noel was writing the songs recording the guitar parts. Frontman

(34:23):
Liam is able to knock out his lead vocals after
hearing Noel sing the songs to him just once because
he's they're brothers. They got it like that. So he
goes in records. It boom, perfect take done, next song,
real rock star energy, I mean, like impressive. Like these guys,
these guys are knocking out hits, like like Henry Ford
knocking out model to him. I mean they're just banging
them out right at this point, like Oasis is a

(34:45):
locked in pop music music factory like Barry Gordy and
Smokey Robinson in Motown days would be like that's probably
they're making hits. So anyway, so what does this all
mean though, Well, it means that Liam doesn't have enough
to do because he's able to knock out his tracks,
so okay, and then Nol starts messing around the guitar
doing another song. So Liam gets bored. So what does

(35:05):
Liam doing? He gets bored, he pops down to the
local pub and he gets cozy with all the local
drug dealers. I don't know, that's a recipe for disaster, right,
So okay, little brother Liam too good at his job
knocking out hit songs too quickly, so after one or
two of them are done, he's off to the pub
and he starts bringing bandmates down there too. So now

(35:26):
Nold starts noticing there's nobody around for him. He starts
getting bummed up. He's like, hey, guys, what do you think. Oh,
everyone's down at the pub with Liam. Okay. So it
gets worse though, because it's not just sad one night,
Liam decides to bring the pub back to the studio,
of course, and so he brings all his drug and
pub friends back to the manor home where the band
has been recording their album. So cut to Nol hammering

(35:47):
away in the studio, still knocking out the hit songs,
and there's old Liam and his like personal press gang
of Nardawells and dope fiends, and they come back a
lot up with the country lane. Okay. Liam recalls this
moment innocently enough. He's like, now, I shouldn't have brought
them back. But I thought we were a rock and
roll band, you know what I mean? I thought anything
goes in oasis. No. I mean, obviously other people had rules,

(36:09):
you know what I mean? The rules man goodness, So
no rules, no law, no gods, no masters. All right,
But if you're gonna be about it, let's be about it, Elizabeth.
I'd like you to close your guys, ask to picture it.
A farmhouse in the English countryside evening time. After leaving
behind a life working as the assistant dog groomer to

(36:32):
the royal family, you've moved on and found some of
the quiet life of an English country village. You're working
at a farm. You're in charge of shepherd and geese
around the pastures. You're a gooseherd. You love it, but
the village is a little bit boring. So this evening
you've been invited down the lane to a new friend's farmhouse.
A band is in town. Everybody's been talking about it.
Now you finally get to meet the band. It's Oasis,

(36:53):
those lovable cokehead lads from the TV. But you've commented
inconvenient time. One of the band members is still recording
tracks when you arrive at the farm, but your new
friend tells you it's cool. You two can watch Noel record.
He likes to be watched, or rather he likes an audience. Anyway.
You sit on the recording studio couch and you watch
Noel Gallagher sing into a mic, and then the gates

(37:14):
of hell yawn open. It starts with the sound of
a drunken crowd drawing closer. Then a door to the
farmhouse slams open against a wall, but noisy crowd is
suddenly everywhere. They are in the farmhouse named room. You
can hear them just outside the door to the recording studio.
Then you hear laughter, glasses sounds like a fire extinguisher.
You get confirmation of the fire extinguisher when the door

(37:34):
to the recording studio kicks open and there's little brother
Liam Gallagher, and he's armed with the aforementioned fire extinguisher.
He starts spraying it around the room. He's drunker than
anyone you've ever seen in your life. His gleeful, wicked
gran is just beaming out of his face. The others
with him also spill into the studio, all loud and drunk.
Someone tackles somebody, They land on the soundboard. It's all chaos.

(37:58):
Noel comes storming out of the record He immediately attacks
his brother. They wrestle around on the ground at your feet.
You're trying to move your legs out of the ways.
You don't get an ankle hurt boom. You want to leave,
but your trap because people are still coming in the door.
There are drunks pouring into this tiny recording studio, a
steady river of drunks. Elizabeth, Oh, you're just getting wet
with drunks, You're god. So some of these still, some

(38:19):
of these guys still have pints in their hands from
the pub. Like it is like a scene. So now
there's more fighting. The soundboard is getting broken, beers just
billed on it. Several studio monitors are getting kicked in.
Now there's like, oh, there's a pile of electronics just
in the corner going just broken. It looks like a
little sad, busted up robots. It's just kind of pitiful.
Then the cricket bat comes out boa Noel is swinging it.

(38:42):
He connects solid strike to his brother's dome. He does
not knock the music back out of his head, though.
But you think I'd said I'm out of here. This
is two, this is nuts. I can't I can't handle this.
So you get up from the couch, You shove your
way through the drunks, you push your way out of
the farmhouse, and as soon as you're outside, you see
Noel another bandmate hop out of a window. Noel on

(39:03):
the replacement drummer head for our car, right, and you
hear yourself ask for a ride and immediately regret asking
for the ride. But it's they're like, yeah, sure, come on.
You're like okay, you run and you hop in the
little tiny rountal card just as you. Noel and the
replacement drummer, whose name is Whitey, we're all driving off.
You spot him there he is. Liam runs up blocking
the lane. He has a trash can over his head.

(39:25):
He looks like Atlas holding up the earth right, and
then he hucks the trash can right out the car.
You hear Noel order that Whitey floret and drive right
at his brother. The replacement drummer does as told. He's
a replacement drummer, and it works. Liam dives out of
the way and the car zooms past. You're free, kind
of You're in a car stuck with Arrius Noel Gallagher. Yeah,

(39:46):
so why do the replacement drummer he can't believe what
just happened, and is he's driving. He's just muttered himself.
He can't be over. I've only just joined. And then
you hear noltell no, no, no, this is gonna happen
all the time, mate, And then white do you replacement
drummer replies, oh how how oh mate, what kind of
band is this? And you ask Whitey if he can
just pull over because you'd like to get out and walk. Yeah, yeah,

(40:06):
exactly what a night, huh. I should have just been
all released. The geese disappear. Yeah, like Dracula, the geese
on the Oh, I thought they were just coming. I
would have my standing army of geese. Get I thought
it was going to come in and grab you. And
just afterwards, Oh okay, never mind, take back all right, Well, listen,

(40:30):
we'll jump forward now to September nineteen ninety five. Later
in the same year, Noel is now starting to talk
publicly about wanting to leave the band, just openly. Yeah.
The bat to the head was his bowment. He's like,
I had to hit my brother in the head with
a cricket bat. I've got to think about my life choicest.
So at that exact same time, though, thanks to songs
like Champagne Supernova and wonder Wall and Don't Look Back

(40:53):
at Anger, their new album becomes the biggest album in
the world. Now He's Locked In becomes such a monstrous
all around the world anywhere they go, people are singing
their songs right back out right. We're just really wild
for these boys from Manchester. Yeah, oh right, So they
now have to enlarge their egos to deal with what
is their curse. Yeah yeah, it's a big brother nol.

(41:14):
He can't help it act out now as well. So
there was this time MTV e goes to interview him.
The Noal is just like full of themselves. He's not
really thinking about what he's saying, but he says something
that would really come to haunt him. He says, if
people were honest with themselves, quote the majority of people
in this country take drugs, then I mean the better
off will all be. Everybody does it? You do it,
you do it, you do it. He's pointing out like

(41:37):
all the people around him with cameras. He points at
his bodyguard. He doesn't do it because he's a Buddhist.
But you know, it's like getting up having a cup
of tea in the morning. In that line, a cup
of tea in the morning, get just stuck in the
British girl. So that becomes the statement for all the
pearl clutching to just rally around. So the mainstream British
press they start writing up headlines and the headlines write

(41:57):
themselves like drugs are my cup of tea, and so
they just the son and big bold type. Wasn't there
that study where they checked like five and twenty pound
notes for for cocaine and it was ridiculous, like apparently,
and also the sewers, the British Sewers have just cocaine
running through exactly and it oases only blame for seven percent.

(42:20):
Event Yeah, for the next decade, the band continues to
embarrass themsel hosts on stages all around the world, and
Liam even tries to repeat himself and he hugs the
tambourine and his brother's head again. Yeah, it's always a
shame when an act realizes it's time to just go
out there and play their greatest hits. You're like, I'm
doing the tambourine bit, guys. Anyway, So in two thousand

(42:42):
and nine, Oasis breaks up, all right, and they did
it on my birthday. Shocker of all shockers. The breakup
happens in mid tour. Oh yeah, it's always fun. He
was due to a fight between the brothers, and this
time it is the absolute hum danger of a knockdown,
drag out fight, worse than the studio fight that I
told you about. You're a witness there. Yes, they're in

(43:02):
Paris at the time, the City of Lights, and they
had two shows left to play on their tour. They
were just two shows left, that's all they had to do.
They were the headliners for this big summer festival, and
the brothers at this point are traveling separately. They were
not speaking to each other. They have intermediary's pretty much
jungle a communication, but they still have to get out
on stage together, and then they also have to be
backstage together before they get out on stage together. So

(43:24):
there's two moments people have to keep them separate. Yeah,
they can't do it. As Noel remembered it for an
interview with Esquire magazine, well, we had two gigs left,
and I reckon. If I'd had got to the end
of that tour and i had six months off, I
would have just forgotten about it, gone on with it.
But the straw that broke the camel's back was that
night in Paris, and that was a fight. Was pissed

(43:47):
at Liam because, in true rockstar fashion, the rock star
was getting into fashion. So Liam he had this new
label called Pretty Green. Okay, he was trying to hawk
it at all their shows and put it in all
their stuff and get the fans to bude. He started
down to siphen some of the huge audience. He's like,
if I can get them to buy this stuff, I'm
banking right. So No's like, what are you doing? You're

(44:09):
watering down the name or you're stupid anyway, so he
goes after him and U now, I quote this is
from Noel. I've never had enough of Oasis. Our own
relationship was never as bad as people made it out.
But it wasn't like we weren't like Millie Vanilly what
that whatever that means, I don't know. It kind of
all started to unravel, if I'm being honest, when he
started his clothing label and demanded it in the Oasis

(44:30):
to a program that he'd be allowed to advertise it,
which I was against. I didn't think that it was
right for him to be flogging his gear to our fans,
and there was a massive row about it, and it
kind of went back and forth for a bed, as
I remember, and I said, all right, if you want
to advertise in the program, how much And he couldn't
get his head around that, so Noel's backstage arguing about
money with his brother in the fashion and his brother
it just erupts, right. He's like, and he was quite

(44:52):
violent at that point. There hadn't been any physical violence,
but it was kind of really like he hit him
with a cricket bat. But he's like that point, no virus,
that doesn't that's underneath the bar exactly. So he's like,
but it's kind of like it was a bit like
WWE wrestling, and he was like macho man, Randy Savage
and he was like, oh yeah, and he had that
going on. It was like hell, and I'll never forget.

(45:15):
I'm looking at Andy, who was sitting there. Andy is
one of the band members, I guess, and constantly how
many shoes he's gone on, not saying a word, and
I'm like, no, now, you know what I mean, and
he kind of just storms out of the dressing room.
I'm glad it ended like this. And on the way out,
he picked up a plum and he threw it across
the dressing room and he smashed against the wall. Part

(45:35):
of me wishes it did end like that. That would
have been a great headline. It did not end with
the plums and Yeah, he's just hucking fruit and well,
and what was this thing about how many pairs of shoes?
I don't know. It was like it was from a quote,
and so I left it in. But he's just talking
about andy like he's got with a bunch of shoes.
It makes if you just try to follow his like

(45:56):
his quotes. He's just bouncing around. Done drugs, I think
maybe a little bit. They are what you call an advertisement,
a cautionary tale for perhaps not doing so many goods.
All right, So now Liam gets ready, he's gonna leave
the dressing room after they fight about money and whatever else,
and he's getting embarrassed in front of the other people, right,
So Noel picks up the story again and then he

(46:17):
kind of leaves. He goes out the dressing room for
whatever reason. He went to his own dressing room, because
remember they have their own dressing Yeah, and he came
back with a guitar and he started wielding it like
an axe. No, I'm not kidding, and I'm making light
of it because it's kind of what I do. But
it was a real unnecessary violent act and he's swinging
the guitar around. He nearly took my face off with it.
So Noel was able to keep his face from meeting

(46:39):
the guitar, right, and he says, but he says something
about his brother's guitar playing, and then like really hit
a like a I don't know something inside Liam, because
Liam then flings the guitar, his guitar, his own guitar,
throws his own guitar back at Nol. Sorry at Nol,
Noel says, and what should you know a better? I'll
go with the eyewitness. There was an eyewitness and Evolve

(47:00):
party and they said, naturally it missed and landed next
to his feet instead. So what does NOL do? Well? Well,
according to that same eye witness, realizing Liam had mistakenly
thrown his own guitar, Noel looked down, shrugged, and then
stamped seven bells out of it until it resembled the
bottom of a hamster's cage. So can't I just can't

(47:23):
with these two. The guitar has now become an avatar
for the band, right right, And so this is back
to Nol. It ended up on the floor and I
put it out of its misery and then I said, well, look,
I mean there were people who were in the band
looking the other way. It wasn't even a big dressing room.
And I was like, you know what, I'm out of here.
And at that point someone came in and said five minutes.
Oh no, I kind of got in the car and

(47:44):
I sat there for five minutes and I just said
I can't do it anymore. So going back to that
same backstage eye witness, Yeah, Noel flicked the vs, walked
out the backstage area, got in a taxi and went home.
So okay, that was that guitar smash band broke getting
good times over right. Yeah, they're fought about money, and
now all the money training went off exactly, so the

(48:06):
battling gallaghers had finally killed their greatest success. Well and
all of the people that work for the band. That's
what people don't realize. Every big touring act is has
like a huge amount of employees and keep it running.
And when they either break up or they decide to
like call it quits like that, or someone gets hurt
and they break their heap and they can't or whatever.

(48:27):
And I think that's why a lot of like older
bands really keep chugging along because it's a it's a
whole business. Yeah, they really count for the whole family. Yeah,
Willie Nelson ducks a lot about Yeah. Yeah, that's a
good example. Well, final word for this one, Elizabeth. Yes,
as Noel would explain himself, I quote, I've accepted it.
I'm a bit of a bastard. What can I say?
You know, a bit of a Oh okay, wow, we

(48:50):
can beat that, Elizabeth. I got one question for you
after all this, Yes, what is our ridiculous takeaway here?
Our ridiculous takeaway is please don't put your life in
the hands of a rock and roll band, to quote
the Brothers. So yeah, there you go. That's my ridiculous
takeaways everything I just said. Yeah, that's why I figured. Well,

(49:13):
thank you for listening. You're welcome. You can find us
online if you'd like, at Ridiculous Crime on both Twitter
and Instagram. We are on the both, and you can
also email us at ridiculous Crime at gmail dot com.
You can hit us up on iHeart app. You leave
us a talk back. We enjoy those. Yes, Other than that,
just wish us well, yes, please and let me know
thanks for listening. Ridiculous Crime is hosted by Elizabeth Dutton

(49:41):
and Zaron Burnett, produced and edited by Noel Gallagher's ghostwriter
Dave Cousta. Researches by Marissa I Prefer Blur Brown and
Andrea Yeah, I prefer Radiohead song, Sharp and Cheer. Our
theme song is by Thomas Baby Brother Lee and Travis
Little Brother Dutton. Executive producers are Ben I'm Team Noel
Bowland and no Well. I'm Team Liam, brad Ridcreas Quiet

(50:09):
See One More Time We Dequeous Crime. Ridiculous Crime is
a production of iHeartRadio. Four more podcasts from my heart Radio.
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