February 28, 2025 • 26 mins
It's a "90 Day Fiance" first: A throuple! Matt and Amani are going anything but rogue to discuss how they make their unique situation work and where they are thinking of moving their family to next.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:09):
Hi, everyone.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
We're met in a mini from Nagday Fiance and we're
excited to be here on Rogue Energy to talk about our.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Non traditional relationship.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
As the first Ruffle on the show, we've experienced a
unique journey love and commitment and navigating life, you know,
in the public eye, while our third partner couldn't be
here today.
Speaker 1 (00:31):
We're ready to dive into what's really like being in
a throttle. So let's get into it, all right, you ready? Okay?
Why would you say you have rogue energy? It's a
good question.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Well, you know, I'm not going I'm energetic. I'm an
outdoorsy type. I'm always optimistic.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
Well, I have broken away from what people think. I've
always tried to like go against all the direction, against
the norm. I think we both had broke energy within
us individually and together for sure. You know, I just
learned a new vocabulary by the way, Rogue Energy. I
didn't even know what that meant. No, English is my
(01:13):
third language. So for people who don't know who we are,
you know, or what our story is. When people, how
did we meet? Do you remember?
Speaker 3 (01:25):
Well, we originally met on Tinder and later on I
got to take her out for her twenty first birthday.
She invited me to a wonderful evening and good night
on the town, and I took her and she had
a blast and never left myself.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
I was not looking for a husband. I was not.
I was just trying to have fun. One of those
things that you just have to keep your mind open
and your heart open. I guess, And here we are.
So did you always know I was bisexual?
Speaker 3 (01:52):
I'm always known you're bisexual. I mean, you've had a
gay pride tattoo since I met you.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
He did pick me up from the lesbian bark couple
of times.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
Did we ever plan on becoming like the threpold relationship?
Not really. It kind of landed on our lap and
we accepted it.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
What is something that was attractive to you about me?
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Oh? My god? Have y'all seen her?
Speaker 1 (02:13):
No?
Speaker 3 (02:14):
Note, She is the most powerful woman I've ever met.
You know, she has that aura about her that demands
the room, and if you don't, you will take it.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
I think I've always lived like a survival mode, and
I've gone through like a lot of difficult things in
life where I had to adapt and I didn't have
so much like family or support or to rely on.
And all I've known is to be strong, and every
time like life knocks me down, I don't have a
choice but to pick myself up and be stronger and
(02:48):
not let it gets to me. So I guess that's
how I became strong. You're not born strong strong, You're
made strong in life. So how long into your marriage
to our marriage did the discussion of opening our marriage come?
Pull brought it up?
Speaker 3 (03:01):
First? It was just fun at first, so that really
never came up. It was just assumed we both like girls.
And then when it became something serious, I think it
was just a time that we came upon and we
both discussed it together. I don't think any one of
us really had any thoughts ahead of the other.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
I think Matt knew me being bisexual. At some point,
I really wanted to feel complete, And it has nothing
to do with him not being enough or anything like that.
It's just when you're bisexual, really want to be with
both sexes. And my attraction with women is something that
never stopped the years of marriage.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
And so you know, I tried to grow up VA giant.
It just didn't didn't work. You know, they're not solved,
you know, hard their firm.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
I tried to throw a wig on him and didn't
work out, and then it just.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
Doesn't doesn't hit my figure.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
I guess, did you know anyone that was practicing ethical
non monogamy? I'm sorry, did you quote that from like
what's her name from? From? I heard this? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (04:10):
Yeah, ethical non monogamy? You heard it on Jasmines?
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Oh yeah, that's right, that's.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Right, And I mean, yeah, we did. But they were
really weird. They're very weird, so it wasn't something that
we automatically assumed we would be a part of.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
Yeah, like we we accidentally once ended up at a
swingers party and we were like, oh, yeah, no, no,
this is not us. We don't we're definitely all swingers.
We're not sister Vived, none of that. Like we just
this is a throoutbol situation.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Did we discuss any of the rules before bringing sminus
of the relationship? No, we just dove in. We were
just like, you know, we'll figure out the rules as
we go.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
I'm I'm some things like I guess we discussed, but
it wasn't like said up certain rules, more like hey,
let's give it up, communication open, things like that.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
But now our rules are like you have to meet
this benchmark in a relationship, and you know, if I
don't give enough kisses during the day and in trouble.
Speaker 1 (05:12):
But taken of rules of something that was going to
be addressed in the season. So I can't wait for
you guys to see that. So were there things you
were hoping this new third would fulfilled in our relationship?
Speaker 3 (05:26):
We didn't have expectations at first. You know, at first
it was all fun. It was when we started seeing
certain things fulfilled that we never expected that this became
that kind of serious.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
I think it sounds wrong to say I'm going to
bring somebody outside of our marriage to make us our
marriage better, to make our marriage more fulfilled.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
No, we just wanted more.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
I think it happened like it was kind of like
the benefits of bringing this third person. It was never
the main intention of that. You know, what would you
think to things like one of the things that that
were fulfilled, we're having.
Speaker 3 (05:59):
A third Well, yeah, and in some kind of way,
you know, I was hoping that you would get your
fulfillment because I mean I know that that's a big
part of you. You know, like you've been gay since
I met you. So you know, like I really wanted
that for her, and.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
I never wanted to go behind Mett's back, and you know,
these girls and things like that, Like it's great to
be able to not lie to your partner and be
able to be your true self. Did you have a
specific type of person you were looking to bring into relationship?
What we're eature you're looking for for a mini?
Speaker 3 (06:29):
A mini is definitely one that used to have a type.
And it's so odd because Annie does not fit that profile.
So it just even more you know, RECOGNI recognition that
that's the right person. You know, it wasn't preconceived, it
was just something that that fell in line.
Speaker 1 (06:45):
Well, my type was and still is. I guess I
don't have necessarily a type of physical type anymore. It's
more like really the person inside. But I was into
more like more, I guess, like masculine girls. And I
was like, you know, more the feminine girl. But Annie
has a messument intersurry about her because she's very strong
and powerful, and but you know she could she could
(07:07):
be so Mcevellez needed, she could be more like leading
and powerful as needed like and so am I like,
I found so much similarity with her.
Speaker 3 (07:15):
You do have a type. You do like the tall
you know, like you do love that I like them tall.
She wants to feel like that, you know, she's protected
and cared for.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
When you met Annie in the club in Mexico, it
was that conversation like did you talk to each other first?
Who approached her?
Speaker 3 (07:33):
What was that conversation like, yeah, so she actually has
a friend that introduced him. I'll let you take this one.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Yeah, my friend is Usual was working at the club
and he was like, oh, I want to introduce you
to somebody who's actually bisexual just like you. And I
was like, oh cool, interesting, And you know, he introduced
us and she was so easy to talk to. The
first thing she did was come talk to me, which
I thought was like a you know, respectful gesture, like
maybe she thought like, oh, I'm the wife. She goes
(07:59):
talk to him, maybe I'll I'll take it the wrong way.
We talked and I was gracious, so easy to talk
to the first day we met, we talked into like
literally six a m just about everything in life. Is
the last time I talked to somebody that easily was
my husband? So mm hmm, that's fine. I remember this question.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
So you end up hitting it off. Let's talk about
the first night as a trio. How was that nervous, exciting, scary?
Actually no, it was very very fun, very energetic, surprising.
You know, like you think that there's going to immediately
be this attraction that drives you all to be very sexual,
but no, the chemistry there just wanted us to make
(08:39):
friendships first, so like very quickly, you know, we just talked,
talked to each other's ears off and got to know
each other.
Speaker 1 (08:46):
We still hated, but.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
But day now that you brought it up, you know
like it was.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
It was.
Speaker 3 (08:54):
It was a breath of fresh air that someone you know,
that could take care of my wife's needs to you know,
like every other little fling that we've had.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
It that brings the next question. Have we experimented with
bringing people in prior to being any Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
We've had a couple you know things, but no one
to really speak of.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
I had my soul flings, so but it's not the same.
I mean, how did you feel after your night together
and did you have any surprising feelings towards mynt honey, the.
Speaker 3 (09:36):
Surprice that it brought us closer together?
Speaker 1 (09:39):
Yeah, I didn't have like it was like, oh I'm jealous. No,
not at all, Like, yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
It was a feeling. It was a very warm feeling,
like like kind of sparkly, you know, like we get buttered.
We've all got butterflies in our stuff.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
I've always been open about, like like some stuff in
my sexuality, which is like I am a voyeur. I
think that's the right expression, as I arouse from watching
my partner be with other women. And yeah, I guess
it did bring us closer in that sense, So I'm
not ashamed of it. I don't care. How did you
(10:13):
ladship progress quickly or slowly?
Speaker 3 (10:16):
You know, we kind of intentionally took it a little slow.
We thought that, oh, this is fun. Let's let's put
it in that category is fun. It's just there was
that day that it started becoming more and more real,
and that's when we were like, wait a minute, let's
reassess this. And we talked to each other about it.
See exactly where we all were.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Did any one of us connect with her faster?
Speaker 3 (10:37):
Oh yeah, I would say that girls, you know, they
run relationships a lot faster than men. And you know,
like a part of me was just sitting back and
enjoying the you know, nuances of a lesbian relationship, but
you know, very quickly. I was like, wow, that moved
quite quickly. Let me let me Hi, tell my butt
back up here. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
I mean I would say definitely there was a stronger bond,
but you, me and her, I think you were a
little bit more reserved. But he liked that relationship. In general,
I fall love faster. I just go faster pace than him,
and like a lot of things in life. So he
just takes his time. That's just his personality and that's
totally okay, And that's the thing you have to accept
(11:21):
in a throatble. Not everybody's going to go the same pace. Yeah,
and you have to be accepting of that and give
people their time when they're ready.
Speaker 3 (11:29):
Yeah. I mean originally I did feel a little bit
of pressure, and I think they really understood that and
kind of should welcomness.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
How did we progressed to conversations and talk about being
in a throat ble. I think it like happened and
we were like, oh, we are in a threatble.
Speaker 3 (11:43):
So yeah, you don't realize that you're in a relationship
almost till you're in a relationship. And then we just
kind of turned around. It's like, is this the path
that we're going down? And both of us Yeah, by
this time, we had both had feelings for Hanni, and I.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
Mean we talked about how do you comfortable with this,
like having a gownership with both of us, and then
she's like, yeah, I'm here. You know, it's okay. Our accent,
it's okay. Since opening of our relationship, have we grown
stronger together? Have there been bumps in the road you
(12:19):
weren't anticipating.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
Both both there were. Initially there was more bumps, you know,
like just just testing out new waters. You know, of
course we're going to step on some kind of toes.
But you know, in the end, yeah, we came became
very very, very much stronger together. There's always somebody to
bounce wisdom off of, and I mean, I think that
we we just bring out the best of each other.
(12:41):
I don't know how to explain that.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
What has been the most challenging aspect of opening our
mirrors so far? And how have you navigated that? I
think for me it's like the one on one alone
time between me and Matt is becoming like have become
less and less in their relationship and sometimes you miss
(13:04):
that And it's just like finding a healthy way to say, like, hey,
I would like you know, one on one time, but
that that goes both ways, Like he could have one
time with her, I could have one one time you
know with her as well. So just kind of like
giving people their their their space and the relationship that
they need. What about you?
Speaker 3 (13:24):
And you know, at first, I say, was the biggest,
you know, thing that I had to learn is when
do I develop the relationship and when do I let
y'all develop the relationship? But you know, I think that
that's all pretty in order.
Speaker 1 (13:37):
Now. Did you ever fear that one or the other
would possibly have a deeper connection with anion?
Speaker 3 (13:46):
Absolutely, I mean that's going to come up very early
in the relationship. But that's something easy that you get to,
you know, get away from because eventually you're going to
go home with your other partner and talk about it. It's
going to be back to y'all too, and then and
then you get to you get to see what it's
like in their mind without the other other partner. That way,
when it's happening, it's not such a big deal to you.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
It would be like a life to say that three
people all love each other equally like the time, yeah,
all the time, Like it changes constantly. But how do
you navigate that? You know, how do you go from there?
And you're going to see that throughout the show. It's
like different levels. It's like here, you're there, Here is crazy.
So I can't wait for you guys to see that
(14:30):
Annie has two children. You have to was that something
that was discussed early in the relationship. So a little
background about honest three children. I see a lot of
people on the online and say, like, oh, you're crazy,
she has three, you have two? That's five kids? Are
you insane? And his oldest child is an adult he's nineteen,
works on his own, like amtly different city. That's one thing.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
The middle me and her both have an adult child,
so technically I have three children.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
Ann's middle child is with the grandmother on the dad's side,
you know, he lives with her. There are no plans
of that changing. So Annie had lists with her daughter aunt,
so who's the same age as my daughter, my oldest daughter.
So technically it's three kids and they you know, with
the age and everything, like everything works works so well,
(15:19):
and I don't want to spoil anything more about like
the dynamics, the kids and anything like that. But yeah,
I mean we knew like from day one, from the
first thing we met her. She was honest about it
everything in her life, and she told us like, I
have three kids, you know, like she would never try
to hide it.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
For people with children, it's not such a big deal
to hear that you have children.
Speaker 1 (15:40):
Totally. But this is why one of the aspects why
our threat pole works because we both have kids and
we understand that kids are priority.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
We understood the relationship.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
Has there been a discussions on blending the family?
Speaker 3 (15:54):
Is? Oh, yes, the goal for a while. It's it's
it's been, it's been in the works since the beginning
of this ever since it became official. You know, we
don't want anyone to choose between the people they love. Yeah,
that's just not that's not our style.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
And there's been progress there, like you you guys will
see in the episode and after the episode. So why
tell the story? Why not? There's no one more perfect
than that of the story.
Speaker 3 (16:21):
They're very exclusive.
Speaker 1 (16:22):
Amount of presentation I've seen in the dating in ninety
day have been so amazing that the fresh of breath air,
it was a breath of fresh air. The breath of
fresh air to see if anybody can handle our story,
and anybody we could trust to our story, it would
be ninety Day Fiance, seriously, ninety or nothing, definitely not
(16:46):
seeking sister wives.
Speaker 3 (16:48):
Sorry, which is ninety day we brought in?
Speaker 1 (16:52):
I think we chose, We chose each other.
Speaker 3 (16:57):
Yeah, I mean they got back with the so quick,
did I mean? It shows that they were invested into
us very quickly as well? Yeah, I mean I've never
heard of another ninety Day Fiance cast being contacted within
two hours of submission.
Speaker 1 (17:12):
So, and I know a lot of people apply. I
bet I don't. I'm thinking, but if you have a
unique story to tell, which I believe ours was, like
ninety day Fiance, will like welcome you with open arms
and they would work so hard with you on telling
your story the way it is, you know, And I
(17:35):
love my experience so so far, so far, not gonna wounds.
The legality of your our relationship coming to Fruition is
a lot different than others on the show. Can you
walk us through it?
Speaker 3 (17:48):
Well? Yes, so we're we're legally married. We are we
are happy like.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
One step before everybody else.
Speaker 3 (17:53):
We have been married for ten years, so we do
have to separate and go through a divorce to marry
Annie one of us too and bring her over.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
Here and or not stupid. We've talked to lawyers Mexico
here all that I see people saying, like, how are
you gonna do this? How you going to do this?
Is not gonna worry. It's like we've thought about this
very deeply. A lot of money is invested in this.
From a legal perspective, we are taking a big risk.
Of course, like divorce is not easy in the state
of California. It takes time, as assets, separated, kids involved,
(18:24):
all these things to show you how big the sacrifices
that we're making. But I think we've been married for
so long. I don't need a piece of paper to
feel that I'm married to you. And if it's that's
what it takes to take that sacrifice to bring Annie here,
then you know it's it's it's it's natural to happen.
Speaker 3 (18:43):
Yeah, I mean, divorcing a mini would be the largest,
you know, bittersweet pill I've ever swallowed, and but you
know I'm choking it down and it's fur the greater good.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Oh I wanted to also add how it's different from
other cast members or other stories. I think it's what
makes it more difficult, Like I was just definitely harder emotionally, mentally, financially,
you know, legally, all that stuff. So so it's it's.
Speaker 3 (19:15):
It's way than a lot of other stories that you
come across.
Speaker 1 (19:20):
Definitely, it's not that simple. Does it be.
Speaker 3 (19:23):
Heavier on one of you than the other? Not so much,
I would say, so. I honestly think that, you know what,
I mean, it was my dream to marry this woman,
so you know, like just to give that up is
you know, you know, a little hard. But is it
something that we're doing. Absolutely so I think, yeah, it
weighs a little harder on me. But I don't think
(19:44):
that she takes it lightly.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
I come from a fam of divorce. I always thought
I would never get divorced, like it's looked up, it's
looked down upon my culture for women's divorce. But I
just don't. I see, we're beyond that.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
Like it's it's one thing she knows is that you know,
I'll never I'll never be without her. I mean, I
love you. It won't change anything about how I feel.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
Oh what is Annie's thoughts of coming to America to
be a family.
Speaker 3 (20:22):
Oh, I mean, I don't think Annie would really do
it if it really wasn't for her child. I mean,
she loves her child so much that you know, like
she would make the sacrifices in her life to make
the move. But Annie lives a good life and she's
perfectly happy in Mexico.
Speaker 1 (20:37):
Yeah, she wanted us to move to her.
Speaker 3 (20:40):
She was like here, they here for a while, but
you know, there's a lot to benefit for her young
and and we want the best for Anto.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
It's very hard when you're dating somewhere from another country
and they show this on nice day, But I can't
emphasize it enough. Like each person on each side of
the world, I guess worked so hard to build the
life that they have to and one of the people
have to like let go of that and start over.
For you to do that, you have to feel like
you can be ulnerable and rely on that person to
(21:13):
help you build yourself back up, hopefully stronger.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
I mean she has. Annie has to put so much
trust in us just to give up a whole life
just to come here. You know, like with children, that's
got to be the most horrifying thing in the world.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
We just want child would move, which is Antonella.
Speaker 3 (21:30):
Antonella is moving with her. We would love to file
for her middle child, you know, like if that becomes
a possibility, or when that becomes a possibility, because I mean,
I'm sure that's something that would be good for him,
if if he could have dual citizenship. But he's in
a really good place with his with his grandparents, So
there's no reason to disturb.
Speaker 1 (21:50):
That he's moving to Mexico thought at all. It is
a thought, it still is to be honest, if for
some reason the visit doesn't work out, all she doesn't
like get aprough or something, or it's taking longer because
Annie has to get like make sure that she can't
leave her daughter as this visa is being filed, right,
(22:11):
So if we're taking a longer rout on the visa,
is it's taken longer for God, for vid it gains denied,
Like we don't have a choice but to try to
make that work. Because I lived in a completely different country,
different culture, Like I'm open living in another culture and
I'll just have to learn the language I speak for
languages anyways, So I.
Speaker 3 (22:31):
Wouldn't mind the diversity for my children. You know, I
think that.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
It's not that far. Thank god, it's not. It's not
like opposite side of the world.
Speaker 3 (22:39):
You know, you know, it's still possible just to go
get some home time. And yeah, and I mean I think,
you know, our children, it's.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
A beautiful country.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
Our children are just fine. We have heard about great
you know, American schools there. So it's if we cross
that bridge, we'll definitely, we'll definitely crossing when we get there.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
People want to know, you still internship together.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
You're gonna have to at Yeah, you'll have to watch.
But I think we've answered that in some kind of way.
Speaker 1 (23:09):
Not really, but there's gonna be a lot of stuff
that will happen that will make you question a first
skill together.
Speaker 3 (23:14):
So you figured it out by the end, you're at
the very end, yeah, because that's the only time you're
going to figure it out.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
Yeah. Is there any worry about the visa status of things,
all this public the way things of the country are
moving forward? Oh?
Speaker 3 (23:29):
Absolutely. You know, we live we live in a country
that you know, things are just becoming a little more
you know, tense and you know a little more strict
in some aspects, So yeah, you know it's on our mind.
We definitely don't want to be torn apart from the
people we care about, but you know, if that process
does get in our way, we will weigh alternative methods.
Speaker 1 (23:50):
Yeah, I mean, we don't try not to think about it.
We want to obviously pursue that pass and try that first.
But the beautiful thing about ninety the Fields is that
it showed you, like with Angela and Michael, when he
didn't get his visit and was denied, they still brought
him here Like that inspires you. If that don't work out,
we're going to find another way because other couples have
(24:12):
done it.
Speaker 3 (24:13):
So absolutely there's a path and we're on it.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
There's always a path exactly exactly take it from me.
I went through multiple paths to be in this country.
Speaker 3 (24:23):
So yeah, she went through a couple of different visas
before got a green cart.
Speaker 1 (24:28):
Where do we see ourselves in five years personally and professionally, she's.
Speaker 3 (24:32):
Going to be the queen of the world. Professionally because
she's almost the queen of the world five.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
Years, I expect to let you know, we're obviously in
good health, We've prospered in life, like mentally that's very important.
Like wealth is right here, not in the money or
the wallet, and your health is the two things. And
then hopefully we're you know, Annie lives with us, their
(25:01):
kids are together, they're grown, bigger house, more money. Hopefully
you don't need a bigger house. Maybe maybe we advocate
we do need a bigger house. We don't.
Speaker 3 (25:11):
We have a massive house.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
To your house. And I just want us to be
like a better version of ourselves right now, Like I
would be so disappointed in us if five years from
now we're the same five years so now you need
to always keep progressing in life.
Speaker 3 (25:28):
I mean, if you looked at us five years ago,
we weren't the same people. So I expect.
Speaker 1 (25:32):
Hopefully we continue to be even better and better. And
maybe we have changed people's perspective on how they think
about troubles. Maybe there'll be more troubles. Heck, maybe we'll
petition to legalize like trouble marriage. You know me, I
go too far as I'd be like in the un
petitioning for this shit. So all right, and do you
(25:53):
still feel like you will be living with the rogue.
Speaker 3 (25:56):
Energy always man to give up this and we're.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
Always gonna be living with energy, and at least it's
gonna be Rogue Energy. We're gonna always live true to
ourself and always gonna have Brogue Energy, that's for sure. Okay, well,
thank you so much for having us today. Follow all
things Rogue Energy at Rogue Energy Podcast. Until next time,
see ya bye,
Hi, everyone.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
We're met in a mini from Nagday Fiance and we're
excited to be here on Rogue Energy to talk about our.
Speaker 1 (00:16):
Non traditional relationship.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
As the first Ruffle on the show, we've experienced a
unique journey love and commitment and navigating life, you know,
in the public eye, while our third partner couldn't be
here today.
Speaker 1 (00:31):
We're ready to dive into what's really like being in
a throttle. So let's get into it, all right, you ready? Okay?
Why would you say you have rogue energy? It's a
good question.
Speaker 3 (00:44):
Well, you know, I'm not going I'm energetic. I'm an
outdoorsy type. I'm always optimistic.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
Well, I have broken away from what people think. I've
always tried to like go against all the direction, against
the norm. I think we both had broke energy within
us individually and together for sure. You know, I just
learned a new vocabulary by the way, Rogue Energy. I
didn't even know what that meant. No, English is my
(01:13):
third language. So for people who don't know who we are,
you know, or what our story is. When people, how
did we meet? Do you remember?
Speaker 3 (01:25):
Well, we originally met on Tinder and later on I
got to take her out for her twenty first birthday.
She invited me to a wonderful evening and good night
on the town, and I took her and she had
a blast and never left myself.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
I was not looking for a husband. I was not.
I was just trying to have fun. One of those
things that you just have to keep your mind open
and your heart open. I guess, And here we are.
So did you always know I was bisexual?
Speaker 3 (01:52):
I'm always known you're bisexual. I mean, you've had a
gay pride tattoo since I met you.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
He did pick me up from the lesbian bark couple
of times.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
Did we ever plan on becoming like the threpold relationship?
Not really. It kind of landed on our lap and
we accepted it.
Speaker 1 (02:09):
What is something that was attractive to you about me?
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Oh? My god? Have y'all seen her?
Speaker 1 (02:13):
No?
Speaker 3 (02:14):
Note, She is the most powerful woman I've ever met.
You know, she has that aura about her that demands
the room, and if you don't, you will take it.
Speaker 1 (02:26):
I think I've always lived like a survival mode, and
I've gone through like a lot of difficult things in
life where I had to adapt and I didn't have
so much like family or support or to rely on.
And all I've known is to be strong, and every
time like life knocks me down, I don't have a
choice but to pick myself up and be stronger and
(02:48):
not let it gets to me. So I guess that's
how I became strong. You're not born strong strong, You're
made strong in life. So how long into your marriage
to our marriage did the discussion of opening our marriage come?
Pull brought it up?
Speaker 3 (03:01):
First? It was just fun at first, so that really
never came up. It was just assumed we both like girls.
And then when it became something serious, I think it
was just a time that we came upon and we
both discussed it together. I don't think any one of
us really had any thoughts ahead of the other.
Speaker 1 (03:19):
I think Matt knew me being bisexual. At some point,
I really wanted to feel complete, And it has nothing
to do with him not being enough or anything like that.
It's just when you're bisexual, really want to be with
both sexes. And my attraction with women is something that
never stopped the years of marriage.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
And so you know, I tried to grow up VA giant.
It just didn't didn't work. You know, they're not solved,
you know, hard their firm.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
I tried to throw a wig on him and didn't
work out, and then it just.
Speaker 3 (03:53):
Doesn't doesn't hit my figure.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
I guess, did you know anyone that was practicing ethical
non monogamy? I'm sorry, did you quote that from like
what's her name from? From? I heard this? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (04:10):
Yeah, ethical non monogamy? You heard it on Jasmines?
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Oh yeah, that's right, that's.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Right, And I mean, yeah, we did. But they were
really weird. They're very weird, so it wasn't something that
we automatically assumed we would be a part of.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
Yeah, like we we accidentally once ended up at a
swingers party and we were like, oh, yeah, no, no,
this is not us. We don't we're definitely all swingers.
We're not sister Vived, none of that. Like we just
this is a throoutbol situation.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Did we discuss any of the rules before bringing sminus
of the relationship? No, we just dove in. We were
just like, you know, we'll figure out the rules as
we go.
Speaker 1 (04:52):
I'm I'm some things like I guess we discussed, but
it wasn't like said up certain rules, more like hey,
let's give it up, communication open, things like that.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
But now our rules are like you have to meet
this benchmark in a relationship, and you know, if I
don't give enough kisses during the day and in trouble.
Speaker 1 (05:12):
But taken of rules of something that was going to
be addressed in the season. So I can't wait for
you guys to see that. So were there things you
were hoping this new third would fulfilled in our relationship?
Speaker 3 (05:26):
We didn't have expectations at first. You know, at first
it was all fun. It was when we started seeing
certain things fulfilled that we never expected that this became
that kind of serious.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
I think it sounds wrong to say I'm going to
bring somebody outside of our marriage to make us our
marriage better, to make our marriage more fulfilled.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
No, we just wanted more.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
I think it happened like it was kind of like
the benefits of bringing this third person. It was never
the main intention of that. You know, what would you
think to things like one of the things that that
were fulfilled, we're having.
Speaker 3 (05:59):
A third Well, yeah, and in some kind of way,
you know, I was hoping that you would get your
fulfillment because I mean I know that that's a big
part of you. You know, like you've been gay since
I met you. So you know, like I really wanted
that for her, and.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
I never wanted to go behind Mett's back, and you know,
these girls and things like that, Like it's great to
be able to not lie to your partner and be
able to be your true self. Did you have a
specific type of person you were looking to bring into relationship?
What we're eature you're looking for for a mini?
Speaker 3 (06:29):
A mini is definitely one that used to have a type.
And it's so odd because Annie does not fit that profile.
So it just even more you know, RECOGNI recognition that
that's the right person. You know, it wasn't preconceived, it
was just something that that fell in line.
Speaker 1 (06:45):
Well, my type was and still is. I guess I
don't have necessarily a type of physical type anymore. It's
more like really the person inside. But I was into
more like more, I guess, like masculine girls. And I
was like, you know, more the feminine girl. But Annie
has a messument intersurry about her because she's very strong
and powerful, and but you know she could she could
(07:07):
be so Mcevellez needed, she could be more like leading
and powerful as needed like and so am I like,
I found so much similarity with her.
Speaker 3 (07:15):
You do have a type. You do like the tall
you know, like you do love that I like them tall.
She wants to feel like that, you know, she's protected
and cared for.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
When you met Annie in the club in Mexico, it
was that conversation like did you talk to each other first?
Who approached her?
Speaker 3 (07:33):
What was that conversation like, yeah, so she actually has
a friend that introduced him. I'll let you take this one.
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Yeah, my friend is Usual was working at the club
and he was like, oh, I want to introduce you
to somebody who's actually bisexual just like you. And I
was like, oh cool, interesting, And you know, he introduced
us and she was so easy to talk to. The
first thing she did was come talk to me, which
I thought was like a you know, respectful gesture, like
maybe she thought like, oh, I'm the wife. She goes
(07:59):
talk to him, maybe I'll I'll take it the wrong way.
We talked and I was gracious, so easy to talk
to the first day we met, we talked into like
literally six a m just about everything in life. Is
the last time I talked to somebody that easily was
my husband? So mm hmm, that's fine. I remember this question.
Speaker 3 (08:18):
So you end up hitting it off. Let's talk about
the first night as a trio. How was that nervous, exciting, scary?
Actually no, it was very very fun, very energetic, surprising.
You know, like you think that there's going to immediately
be this attraction that drives you all to be very sexual,
but no, the chemistry there just wanted us to make
(08:39):
friendships first, so like very quickly, you know, we just talked,
talked to each other's ears off and got to know
each other.
Speaker 1 (08:46):
We still hated, but.
Speaker 3 (08:50):
But day now that you brought it up, you know
like it was.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
It was.
Speaker 3 (08:54):
It was a breath of fresh air that someone you know,
that could take care of my wife's needs to you know,
like every other little fling that we've had.
Speaker 1 (09:03):
It that brings the next question. Have we experimented with
bringing people in prior to being any Yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
We've had a couple you know things, but no one
to really speak of.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
I had my soul flings, so but it's not the same.
I mean, how did you feel after your night together
and did you have any surprising feelings towards mynt honey, the.
Speaker 3 (09:36):
Surprice that it brought us closer together?
Speaker 1 (09:39):
Yeah, I didn't have like it was like, oh I'm jealous. No,
not at all, Like, yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
It was a feeling. It was a very warm feeling,
like like kind of sparkly, you know, like we get buttered.
We've all got butterflies in our stuff.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
I've always been open about, like like some stuff in
my sexuality, which is like I am a voyeur. I
think that's the right expression, as I arouse from watching
my partner be with other women. And yeah, I guess
it did bring us closer in that sense, So I'm
not ashamed of it. I don't care. How did you
(10:13):
ladship progress quickly or slowly?
Speaker 3 (10:16):
You know, we kind of intentionally took it a little slow.
We thought that, oh, this is fun. Let's let's put
it in that category is fun. It's just there was
that day that it started becoming more and more real,
and that's when we were like, wait a minute, let's
reassess this. And we talked to each other about it.
See exactly where we all were.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Did any one of us connect with her faster?
Speaker 3 (10:37):
Oh yeah, I would say that girls, you know, they
run relationships a lot faster than men. And you know,
like a part of me was just sitting back and
enjoying the you know, nuances of a lesbian relationship, but
you know, very quickly. I was like, wow, that moved
quite quickly. Let me let me Hi, tell my butt
back up here. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
I mean I would say definitely there was a stronger bond,
but you, me and her, I think you were a
little bit more reserved. But he liked that relationship. In general,
I fall love faster. I just go faster pace than him,
and like a lot of things in life. So he
just takes his time. That's just his personality and that's
totally okay, And that's the thing you have to accept
(11:21):
in a throatble. Not everybody's going to go the same pace. Yeah,
and you have to be accepting of that and give
people their time when they're ready.
Speaker 3 (11:29):
Yeah. I mean originally I did feel a little bit
of pressure, and I think they really understood that and
kind of should welcomness.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
How did we progressed to conversations and talk about being
in a throat ble. I think it like happened and
we were like, oh, we are in a threatble.
Speaker 3 (11:43):
So yeah, you don't realize that you're in a relationship
almost till you're in a relationship. And then we just
kind of turned around. It's like, is this the path
that we're going down? And both of us Yeah, by
this time, we had both had feelings for Hanni, and I.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
Mean we talked about how do you comfortable with this,
like having a gownership with both of us, and then
she's like, yeah, I'm here. You know, it's okay. Our accent,
it's okay. Since opening of our relationship, have we grown
stronger together? Have there been bumps in the road you
(12:19):
weren't anticipating.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
Both both there were. Initially there was more bumps, you know,
like just just testing out new waters. You know, of
course we're going to step on some kind of toes.
But you know, in the end, yeah, we came became
very very, very much stronger together. There's always somebody to
bounce wisdom off of, and I mean, I think that
we we just bring out the best of each other.
(12:41):
I don't know how to explain that.
Speaker 1 (12:43):
What has been the most challenging aspect of opening our
mirrors so far? And how have you navigated that? I
think for me it's like the one on one alone
time between me and Matt is becoming like have become
less and less in their relationship and sometimes you miss
(13:04):
that And it's just like finding a healthy way to say, like, hey,
I would like you know, one on one time, but
that that goes both ways, Like he could have one
time with her, I could have one one time you
know with her as well. So just kind of like
giving people their their their space and the relationship that
they need. What about you?
Speaker 3 (13:24):
And you know, at first, I say, was the biggest,
you know, thing that I had to learn is when
do I develop the relationship and when do I let
y'all develop the relationship? But you know, I think that
that's all pretty in order.
Speaker 1 (13:37):
Now. Did you ever fear that one or the other
would possibly have a deeper connection with anion?
Speaker 3 (13:46):
Absolutely, I mean that's going to come up very early
in the relationship. But that's something easy that you get to,
you know, get away from because eventually you're going to
go home with your other partner and talk about it. It's
going to be back to y'all too, and then and
then you get to you get to see what it's
like in their mind without the other other partner. That way,
when it's happening, it's not such a big deal to you.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
It would be like a life to say that three
people all love each other equally like the time, yeah,
all the time, Like it changes constantly. But how do
you navigate that? You know, how do you go from there?
And you're going to see that throughout the show. It's
like different levels. It's like here, you're there, Here is crazy.
So I can't wait for you guys to see that
(14:30):
Annie has two children. You have to was that something
that was discussed early in the relationship. So a little
background about honest three children. I see a lot of
people on the online and say, like, oh, you're crazy,
she has three, you have two? That's five kids? Are
you insane? And his oldest child is an adult he's nineteen,
works on his own, like amtly different city. That's one thing.
Speaker 3 (14:52):
The middle me and her both have an adult child,
so technically I have three children.
Speaker 1 (14:57):
Ann's middle child is with the grandmother on the dad's side,
you know, he lives with her. There are no plans
of that changing. So Annie had lists with her daughter aunt,
so who's the same age as my daughter, my oldest daughter.
So technically it's three kids and they you know, with
the age and everything, like everything works works so well,
(15:19):
and I don't want to spoil anything more about like
the dynamics, the kids and anything like that. But yeah,
I mean we knew like from day one, from the
first thing we met her. She was honest about it
everything in her life, and she told us like, I
have three kids, you know, like she would never try
to hide it.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
For people with children, it's not such a big deal
to hear that you have children.
Speaker 1 (15:40):
Totally. But this is why one of the aspects why
our threat pole works because we both have kids and
we understand that kids are priority.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
We understood the relationship.
Speaker 1 (15:51):
Has there been a discussions on blending the family?
Speaker 3 (15:54):
Is? Oh, yes, the goal for a while. It's it's
it's been, it's been in the works since the beginning
of this ever since it became official. You know, we
don't want anyone to choose between the people they love. Yeah,
that's just not that's not our style.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
And there's been progress there, like you you guys will
see in the episode and after the episode. So why
tell the story? Why not? There's no one more perfect
than that of the story.
Speaker 3 (16:21):
They're very exclusive.
Speaker 1 (16:22):
Amount of presentation I've seen in the dating in ninety
day have been so amazing that the fresh of breath air,
it was a breath of fresh air. The breath of
fresh air to see if anybody can handle our story,
and anybody we could trust to our story, it would
be ninety Day Fiance, seriously, ninety or nothing, definitely not
(16:46):
seeking sister wives.
Speaker 3 (16:48):
Sorry, which is ninety day we brought in?
Speaker 1 (16:52):
I think we chose, We chose each other.
Speaker 3 (16:57):
Yeah, I mean they got back with the so quick,
did I mean? It shows that they were invested into
us very quickly as well? Yeah, I mean I've never
heard of another ninety Day Fiance cast being contacted within
two hours of submission.
Speaker 1 (17:12):
So, and I know a lot of people apply. I
bet I don't. I'm thinking, but if you have a
unique story to tell, which I believe ours was, like
ninety day Fiance, will like welcome you with open arms
and they would work so hard with you on telling
your story the way it is, you know, And I
(17:35):
love my experience so so far, so far, not gonna wounds.
The legality of your our relationship coming to Fruition is
a lot different than others on the show. Can you
walk us through it?
Speaker 3 (17:48):
Well? Yes, so we're we're legally married. We are we
are happy like.
Speaker 1 (17:52):
One step before everybody else.
Speaker 3 (17:53):
We have been married for ten years, so we do
have to separate and go through a divorce to marry
Annie one of us too and bring her over.
Speaker 1 (18:02):
Here and or not stupid. We've talked to lawyers Mexico
here all that I see people saying, like, how are
you gonna do this? How you going to do this?
Is not gonna worry. It's like we've thought about this
very deeply. A lot of money is invested in this.
From a legal perspective, we are taking a big risk.
Of course, like divorce is not easy in the state
of California. It takes time, as assets, separated, kids involved,
(18:24):
all these things to show you how big the sacrifices
that we're making. But I think we've been married for
so long. I don't need a piece of paper to
feel that I'm married to you. And if it's that's
what it takes to take that sacrifice to bring Annie here,
then you know it's it's it's it's natural to happen.
Speaker 3 (18:43):
Yeah, I mean, divorcing a mini would be the largest,
you know, bittersweet pill I've ever swallowed, and but you
know I'm choking it down and it's fur the greater good.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Oh I wanted to also add how it's different from
other cast members or other stories. I think it's what
makes it more difficult, Like I was just definitely harder emotionally, mentally, financially,
you know, legally, all that stuff. So so it's it's.
Speaker 3 (19:15):
It's way than a lot of other stories that you
come across.
Speaker 1 (19:20):
Definitely, it's not that simple. Does it be.
Speaker 3 (19:23):
Heavier on one of you than the other? Not so much,
I would say, so. I honestly think that, you know what,
I mean, it was my dream to marry this woman,
so you know, like just to give that up is
you know, you know, a little hard. But is it
something that we're doing. Absolutely so I think, yeah, it
weighs a little harder on me. But I don't think
(19:44):
that she takes it lightly.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
I come from a fam of divorce. I always thought
I would never get divorced, like it's looked up, it's
looked down upon my culture for women's divorce. But I
just don't. I see, we're beyond that.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
Like it's it's one thing she knows is that you know,
I'll never I'll never be without her. I mean, I
love you. It won't change anything about how I feel.
Speaker 1 (20:18):
Oh what is Annie's thoughts of coming to America to
be a family.
Speaker 3 (20:22):
Oh, I mean, I don't think Annie would really do
it if it really wasn't for her child. I mean,
she loves her child so much that you know, like
she would make the sacrifices in her life to make
the move. But Annie lives a good life and she's
perfectly happy in Mexico.
Speaker 1 (20:37):
Yeah, she wanted us to move to her.
Speaker 3 (20:40):
She was like here, they here for a while, but
you know, there's a lot to benefit for her young
and and we want the best for Anto.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
It's very hard when you're dating somewhere from another country
and they show this on nice day, But I can't
emphasize it enough. Like each person on each side of
the world, I guess worked so hard to build the
life that they have to and one of the people
have to like let go of that and start over.
For you to do that, you have to feel like
you can be ulnerable and rely on that person to
(21:13):
help you build yourself back up, hopefully stronger.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
I mean she has. Annie has to put so much
trust in us just to give up a whole life
just to come here. You know, like with children, that's
got to be the most horrifying thing in the world.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
We just want child would move, which is Antonella.
Speaker 3 (21:30):
Antonella is moving with her. We would love to file
for her middle child, you know, like if that becomes
a possibility, or when that becomes a possibility, because I mean,
I'm sure that's something that would be good for him,
if if he could have dual citizenship. But he's in
a really good place with his with his grandparents, So
there's no reason to disturb.
Speaker 1 (21:50):
That he's moving to Mexico thought at all. It is
a thought, it still is to be honest, if for
some reason the visit doesn't work out, all she doesn't
like get aprough or something, or it's taking longer because
Annie has to get like make sure that she can't
leave her daughter as this visa is being filed, right,
(22:11):
So if we're taking a longer rout on the visa,
is it's taken longer for God, for vid it gains denied,
Like we don't have a choice but to try to
make that work. Because I lived in a completely different country,
different culture, Like I'm open living in another culture and
I'll just have to learn the language I speak for
languages anyways, So I.
Speaker 3 (22:31):
Wouldn't mind the diversity for my children. You know, I
think that.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
It's not that far. Thank god, it's not. It's not
like opposite side of the world.
Speaker 3 (22:39):
You know, you know, it's still possible just to go
get some home time. And yeah, and I mean I think,
you know, our children, it's.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
A beautiful country.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
Our children are just fine. We have heard about great
you know, American schools there. So it's if we cross
that bridge, we'll definitely, we'll definitely crossing when we get there.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
People want to know, you still internship together.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
You're gonna have to at Yeah, you'll have to watch.
But I think we've answered that in some kind of way.
Speaker 1 (23:09):
Not really, but there's gonna be a lot of stuff
that will happen that will make you question a first
skill together.
Speaker 3 (23:14):
So you figured it out by the end, you're at
the very end, yeah, because that's the only time you're
going to figure it out.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
Yeah. Is there any worry about the visa status of things,
all this public the way things of the country are
moving forward? Oh?
Speaker 3 (23:29):
Absolutely. You know, we live we live in a country
that you know, things are just becoming a little more
you know, tense and you know a little more strict
in some aspects, So yeah, you know it's on our mind.
We definitely don't want to be torn apart from the
people we care about, but you know, if that process
does get in our way, we will weigh alternative methods.
Speaker 1 (23:50):
Yeah, I mean, we don't try not to think about it.
We want to obviously pursue that pass and try that first.
But the beautiful thing about ninety the Fields is that
it showed you, like with Angela and Michael, when he
didn't get his visit and was denied, they still brought
him here Like that inspires you. If that don't work out,
we're going to find another way because other couples have
(24:12):
done it.
Speaker 3 (24:13):
So absolutely there's a path and we're on it.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
There's always a path exactly exactly take it from me.
I went through multiple paths to be in this country.
Speaker 3 (24:23):
So yeah, she went through a couple of different visas
before got a green cart.
Speaker 1 (24:28):
Where do we see ourselves in five years personally and professionally, she's.
Speaker 3 (24:32):
Going to be the queen of the world. Professionally because
she's almost the queen of the world five.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
Years, I expect to let you know, we're obviously in
good health, We've prospered in life, like mentally that's very important.
Like wealth is right here, not in the money or
the wallet, and your health is the two things. And
then hopefully we're you know, Annie lives with us, their
(25:01):
kids are together, they're grown, bigger house, more money. Hopefully
you don't need a bigger house. Maybe maybe we advocate
we do need a bigger house. We don't.
Speaker 3 (25:11):
We have a massive house.
Speaker 1 (25:16):
To your house. And I just want us to be
like a better version of ourselves right now, Like I
would be so disappointed in us if five years from
now we're the same five years so now you need
to always keep progressing in life.
Speaker 3 (25:28):
I mean, if you looked at us five years ago,
we weren't the same people. So I expect.
Speaker 1 (25:32):
Hopefully we continue to be even better and better. And
maybe we have changed people's perspective on how they think
about troubles. Maybe there'll be more troubles. Heck, maybe we'll
petition to legalize like trouble marriage. You know me, I
go too far as I'd be like in the un
petitioning for this shit. So all right, and do you
(25:53):
still feel like you will be living with the rogue.
Speaker 3 (25:56):
Energy always man to give up this and we're.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
Always gonna be living with energy, and at least it's
gonna be Rogue Energy. We're gonna always live true to
ourself and always gonna have Brogue Energy, that's for sure. Okay, well,
thank you so much for having us today. Follow all
things Rogue Energy at Rogue Energy Podcast. Until next time,
see ya bye,
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