July 4, 2024 • 44 mins
We’ve all seen online advertisements for pills and procedures promising to enhance your erotic adventures: spunk supplements, bussy botox, recreational ED meds and, yes, penis fillers. But just how effective are these temping treatments? In this episode, Gabe and Chris explore the wild new world of bedroom biohacking with NYC’s famed butt doctor Evan Goldstein and LA’s acclaimed dick doctor Joshua Gonzalez. Are you ready to take your sex game to the next level?
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Guests featured in this episode:
Joshua R Gonzalez, MD
instagram.com/joshuagonzalezmd/
Dr. Evan Goldstein
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hey, viewers, Sniffy's Cruising Confessions is an explicit podcast about
queer sex, filter dirty words and unfiltered descriptions of sexual activities.
If hearing about orgies, anonymous sex, kink, fetish, and more
offends your sensibilities, you might want to skip this. Viewer
discretion is advised. It's definitely not for kids. So, Chris,
(00:22):
so this is a bit personal.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Have you ever had to go to the doctor for
a problem or concern you were having with your sexual health?
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Are you talking about STIs.
Speaker 1 (00:31):
Like Sti's any cosmetic stuff or cosmetic me? No, I
know you, I know it's all natural. I would not
judge if you had I.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Don't know what I yeah, I have. What about you? You?
Speaker 1 (00:46):
I mean certainly, I think having sex as a queer
person means you're gonna go to the doctor several times.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
For a lot of things, right, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
And I had a lot of questions, especially in college,
that I never had answered during sexual education in high school.
And I learned a lot of stuf about my health
anecdotally through friends. But I think going to a doctor
really helped kind of like put my mind at ease
regarding some things.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Let's say, it's a perfect world and you can have
anything done to your body. Yeah, and there.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Was a doctor who could do it, what would you fix?
Speaker 1 (01:15):
I think I'm very happy with my body. Like obviously,
there are moments where I compare myself to other people.
I wish I could maybe look like them. Okay, but
I think I would rather do it through like altering
my work and diet than like getting an implant or
anything like that. That type of like permanent medical procedure
(01:36):
seems like a big commitment for me.
Speaker 3 (01:38):
In this episode, we're exploring the wild new world of
hacking in the bedroom through conversations with two renowned medical professionals.
We specialize in helping men have better sex and feel
better about themselves.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
We've all seen online advertisements for pills or procedures promising
to enhance your erotic adventures. Right spunk supplements, bussy botas,
We've got recreational eed meds, and yeah us penis fillers.
We'll find out all the new ways that you can
take your sex game to the next level, and how
to decide if these biohacks are right and safe for you.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
Welcome to Stiffy's Cruising Confessions. I am Gabe Gonzils.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
I'm Chris Patterson Rosso Each week weeks for the Sublime
World of Queer Sex, Cruising and Relationship.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
We'll be talking to queer folks of all kinds. Ask
them questions, swap sex stories, share intimate revelations.
Speaker 4 (02:24):
A lot of us are discovering ourselves in cruising spaces.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
This happened to me at this toilet stall, in the
library or the airport.
Speaker 5 (02:30):
I feel like everybody's gonna fuck a little harder here.
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Damn.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
So I've been like the neighborhood slot, and I took
pride in that.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
I was so afraid but yet so intrigued, And the
more I gave him, the more he could take.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
If you're having sex on Sniffy's, you already have a
moral deficit.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
Our first guest is the most famous dick doctor in
West Hollywood. Doctor Joshua Gonzalez is a Board certified gay
urologist specializing and inclusive sexual health for all. Doctor Gonzalez
focuses on managing sexual dyspunctionions and members of the LGBTQUI
plus community.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Doctor Gonzalez is also the founder of pop Star Supplements,
a medical supplement which promises to improve the volume and
taste of your semen.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
All right, let's welcome doctor Gonzalez. So let's start at
the beginning. How did you get into this work?
Speaker 4 (03:20):
Well, I followed my passion for DIX. I said, how
can I monetize this?
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Yeah, we asked ourselves. You chose this.
Speaker 5 (03:30):
Exactly.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
When I went to medical school, I wasn't really sure
what kind of physician I wanted to be. I was
kind of drawn to urology. I just really liked working
in the sexual health space. It was a way to
kind of make a big difference.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
I think a lot of what I learned about queer
sexual health was sort of anecdotal through friends. Having not
just doctors that specialize in these fields, but queer doctors
that also have the lived experience to kind of understand
where you're coming from and approach to work without stigma
is really really important.
Speaker 4 (03:54):
The total number of hours dedicated to LGBTQ plus topics
in four years of medical school was five hours. WHOA,
And so I wanted to make sure that when I
started my practice that I could be a resource for
people who needed guidance from somebody in their own community.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
What do you find is the most common sexual health
problem that people come to you with questions about or
seeking treatment for.
Speaker 5 (04:15):
The big ones are things like a rectile dysfunction.
Speaker 4 (04:18):
We do testosterone replacement therapy for people with low testosterone
see a lot of low libido, low sexual desire, steroid
induced sexual dysfunction, which is a real thing.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
I honestly don't know the answer to this question. What
is the rectile dysfunction and what causes it?
Speaker 5 (04:35):
That's a great question.
Speaker 4 (04:35):
Yeah, a rectil dysfunction, like textbook definition, is the inability
to achieve or maintain an erection long enough to complete
textual activity.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
What is that length of time? Also, like, so what's
the average just so I.
Speaker 4 (04:50):
Know, Yeah, yeah, it's probably shorter than you think. The
average time to ejaculation in the US, and this is
again mostly based off you know, heterosexual data, is about
five to seven minutes.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
Oh that's a very heterosexual. Oh and that's a heterosexual
length for sure.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
Wow, about seven minutes. Okay.
Speaker 4 (05:09):
I get a lot of patients coming to see me,
you know, thinking that they have premature ejaculation because they
come in like ten to fifteen minutes, and I have
to kind of reset their expectations to help them understand
that doesn't necessarily mean that there's something wrong with them.
But here's some techniques that maybe you could do to
kind of prolong this experience for yourself.
Speaker 1 (05:29):
So I'm curious what does treating erectile dysfunction look like today.
Speaker 4 (05:33):
I want to kind of normalize this as a medical issue, right,
So a lot of work in a rectil dysfunction historically
has has labeled it incorrectly like a condition that happens
to older men. And the reality is is that ED
can happen to somebody at any point in their life,
and the risk of that increases as you get older.
So the statistics show that like thirty percent of guys
(05:56):
in their thirties experience ED at some point, forty percent
in their forties, two percent in their fifties, so it
goes up by about ten percent with each decade of life.
So if you are somebody that happens to be in
their twenties or thirties and has a problem, you know,
performing if you're a young person, that doesn't mean that
there aren't solutions for you. What I do in my
practice is try to figure out why a person is
having that problem.
Speaker 5 (06:15):
So, you know, we do a hormonal evaluation.
Speaker 4 (06:17):
There are like certain hormonal issues that can come up
that can cause problems with your erections. We do an
assessment of someone's erection blood flow. People can have you know,
neurological diseases that can affect their erectile dysfunction. People can
have you know, psychological factors performance, anxiety, stress, grief. You
kind of have to be comprehensive when you're trying to
(06:38):
figure out a solution for someone and and a little
bit of time figuring out what exactly is causing the problem.
Once we know that, there's a lot of different options,
so we can put people on different hormonal treatments. We
can offer them viagracils and the like. There's injection therapy
like tri mix or by mix. There's regenerative therapies that
we do here in the office where we energy based
(07:02):
shockwave therapy or substances like platelet rich plasma to restore
the function and help regenerate the erectile tissue to improve performance.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
Can you talk to me more about this PRP.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
It was described to us as the Kim Kardashian blood thing,
the vampire facial.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
So the vampire facial basically just refer to people like
Kim doing micro needling on their face, right, and then
they use PRP and like rub it on the face
so it gets into the pores from like the microtrauma
that's created from the micro needling, literally your.
Speaker 5 (07:34):
Own blood spun.
Speaker 4 (07:36):
And then we extract the plasma portion of it, which
has platelets and growth factors in it, and then use
it to help regenerate some part of your body. Right,
So in the vampire facial it's to promote collagen and
a last in production in your face, which makes you
look tighter and brighter. In the penis, we injected into
the corporal tissue, the erectile tissue to help improve blood
(07:58):
flow to that area and help improve the function of
that direction tissue.
Speaker 5 (08:01):
So it's a very safe treatment.
Speaker 4 (08:03):
There's really other than like the injections themselves, which are
minimally uncomfortable.
Speaker 5 (08:08):
There's really not any risk associated with it.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Wow, Yeah, I think up until very recently, I was like, Oh,
people can take a pill and that's about it, and
that's it. Yeah, those were the options. I wanted to
shift gears here a bit because you talked earlier about
testosterone replacement therapy. How and when should somebody go about
diagnosing if they're having testosterone loss and what does this
treatment hope to achieve.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
Low t is something that historically in medicine has been
thought of, like as something that only impacts older men,
and as with a retel dysfunction, it is more common
in older men, but it can happen to anybody at
any age, and there's sometimes reasons.
Speaker 5 (08:43):
We don't know why.
Speaker 4 (08:44):
You know, a twenty five year old guy walks through
my door and we measure his blood and it shows
low testosterone. But we do know that globally testosterone levels
have been declining for the last fifty years, so there
must be environmental factors that even if you're somebody that
like leads a healthy lifestyle and you know, is exercising
(09:05):
and eating well and sleeping, there are certain things in
our environment we cannot control. When we see somebody who
has symptoms of low testosterone, which can be everything from
you know, low energy or chronic fatigue to low sexual desire.
Sometimes men will describe brain fog or trouble with cognitive.
Speaker 5 (09:24):
Function remembering words, memory that kind.
Speaker 4 (09:26):
Of stuff, depressed mood, increased anxiety, trouble kind of building
muscle or keeping off body fat or losing weights despite
you know, exercising regularly and eating healthy, to erectile dysfunction.
All of those things can be associated with low testosterone.
So anytime I'm seeing somebody with those symptoms, it's a
pretty easy thing to screen for.
Speaker 5 (09:46):
It's just a blood test. I think.
Speaker 4 (09:47):
The other problem with how testosterone replacement therapy and other
hormonal treatments are offered to patients is that practitioners are
very stringent about what is normal and abnormal. And the
range of normal of testosterone is pretty wide because it
covers men from adolescents until death, right.
Speaker 5 (10:03):
But if you're a.
Speaker 4 (10:04):
Young man and you have a low normal testosterone, there's
a pretty good chance that if you were able to
get that number in the middle to the higher part
of that normal range, you would feel better, a lot
of your symptoms would get better. We very routinely offer
patients in a low normal range treatments to improve that number,
and a lot of those men will end up feeling better.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
I was just going to ask about some of the
side effects of TRT.
Speaker 5 (10:28):
Testosterone replacement therapy is very safe.
Speaker 4 (10:31):
We have like decades, I'm talking seventy eighty years of
data showing that testosterone replacement therapy again when monitored, is
a safe treatment.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
It is a.
Speaker 4 (10:41):
Treatment that involves gels or creams that are applied transdermally
they could absorb through the skin.
Speaker 5 (10:47):
Those are generally done every day.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
There is an injectable testosterone that you can inject either
subcutaneously or intramuscularly, and those are generally done once a
week or sometimes twice week. There are pellets that we
can implant in the office here that go under the
skin through like a tall in office procedure that lasts
for three months. And then the newest form of testosterone
that we've actually been prescribing a lot more recently is
(11:11):
an oral form. It is a short acting testosterone and
the reason that we like it, especially for a lot
of our younger patients, is that one of the side
effects is that your testicles can sometimes shrink in size
our testicular atrophy. And that happens because your testicular volume
is made up of cells that make testosterone and they
(11:32):
make sperm, and when you are supplying your body with
an external form of testosterone, your testicle sort of sees
that and is like, well, we don't really have to
do work right now, so your balls literally shrink, and
as you can imagine, that is distressing to a lot
of people. This new form of oral testosterone doesn't seem
to have as much of an effect on testicular size.
(11:54):
In some men, certain forms of testosterone replacement therapy can
cause their blood to thicken. It's a bone marrow stimulant
and that if left untreated, can theoretically result in blood clots.
So we have to monitor patients who are on testosterone
replacement therapy to make sure their blood doesn't get too thick.
Some men will, you know, experience some acne if they're
using too much. They might start to see like thinning
(12:17):
of their hair if their testosterone gets to be too high,
but we treat it as a, you know, a real
medical issue.
Speaker 5 (12:22):
We monitor our patients pretty closely.
Speaker 4 (12:24):
They're seeing us every few weeks when we first start
them on a treatment to make sure that their hormone
levels are optimal, and then we start to spread out
their visits. But most people are seeing us at least
twice a year, just to make sure they're doing well
and stable on their regimen.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
I think another area that we see talked about a
lot is a topic of penis size, right, I think
there's a certain preoccupation surrounding that. We all know the
size queens, we love them, we respect their interests. Could
you walk us through what options maybe do exist to
addressing anxiety people might have over penis size. You know,
in the US, the average erect length is five and
(12:58):
a half inches, which which is not what we're used
to seeing important and may not be used to what
we're seeing in real life depending on who you're sleeping with,
but that is the reality. Helping men understand what technically
you know qualifies as like a below advertised penis I
think is important. There are cosmetic procedures, as I mentioned,
that are done. The only one that I really think
(13:21):
is safe and reliable is a substance called hyaluronic acid.
It's what most people are using to inject their face
and lips. It's a substance that occurs in our connective
tissue already, so when used for penile enhancement, provides like
a very natural looking enhancement with very little risk. One
of the tricky parts about doing cosmetic filler in the penis,
(13:44):
unlike injecting the lips or in the face, is that
the penis.
Speaker 5 (13:47):
Is kind of a dynamic part of the body, right,
it changes.
Speaker 4 (13:49):
Shape, it gets bigger, it gets harder, You get retraction
when you're cold or you're working out right, so you
have to account for that when you're doing the treatments
here in the office. And one of the best parts
I think about using hyaluronic acid filler is that if
you get an area where the filler kind of settles
and looks uneven, you can easily correct that by adding
more filler nearby to make it look more even, or
you can actually inject it with a solvent agent that
(14:11):
dissolves the filler so that you can customize it to
make it look even and natural. If you're using silicone,
if you're using PMMA, if you're using some of these
collagen stimulating permanent fillers, if something goes wrong, you can't
fix that unless you're going to undergo some sort of
surgical intervention. So I try to counsel patients that are
(14:33):
interested in these treatments to not go the permanent route,
even though that sounds more appealing for some patients, because
with haluronic acid filler, we're finding that it's lasting three,
four or five years sometimes, so it's a semi permanent
solution that many guys will ultimately be happy with and
carries very little risk.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
I just wanted some clarity for our audience, Like, this
is stuff that you should be doing with a doctor,
not necessarily at home.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Correct.
Speaker 4 (14:59):
Yeah, I think if you're thinking about altering the shape
or size of your penis, you really should be doing
that in the context of a healthcare provider who knows
what they're doing, who has a lot of experience doing it.
You know, I wouldn't go to have filler in my
face done by, you know, a gynecologist, and I wouldn't
want and vice versa, right, Like I want to go
(15:21):
to a plastics person or a dermatologist who is familiar
with facial anatomy and does these kinds of injections all
the time.
Speaker 5 (15:27):
And I think the same should be true for penile filler, right, Like, I.
Speaker 4 (15:30):
Don't know that the same dermatologists that's like great at
doing lips is the right person to be doing penises.
Speaker 5 (15:37):
Yeah, they're very different. It's not the same thing.
Speaker 4 (15:40):
I might be biased when I'm saying this because I'm
a urologist, but like, we literally spent years of our
life studying the penis anatomy. We know all of the
vital structures, we know how it works, we know how
to avoid causing damage. Like, that's the kind of person
that I want injecting my dick if I'm going to
get an enhancement.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
So I'm curious.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
I wanted to move on to something we addressed earlier
in the episode pop Star Supplements, I think I've heard about.
I'm truly so intrigued. A lot of folks are very
fixated on like big loads. I'm curious what sort of
need Popstar Supplements addresses that you've seen as a doctor,
and how this might be different than other things we've
seen before.
Speaker 5 (16:17):
The pop Star story is unique.
Speaker 4 (16:19):
So it is a company that my business partner and
I started. I had just been seeing a lot of
you guys who would ask me if there was anything
that they could do to make their loads bigger, And
when we were kind of formulating this plan, thought well,
why don't we create a supplement that kind of hits
all of the aspects of seamen health. So we wanted
(16:40):
to make volume bigger. We wanted to put ingredients in
there that supported sperm health in case someone was interested
in maximizing their fertility potential. And then we were like,
wouldn't it be cool if we could like affect the taste, right.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
This is why we need a queer doctors. Yes, please,
thank you.
Speaker 4 (16:56):
Yeah, so you know, I mean that's one of the
other complaints that people have, even if they like com
is like, well that that particular load didn't taste the greatest,
So like, what could we do to like sweeten the
taste as much as possible. We wanted to approach this problem,
which we feel is a real medical issue from a
pleasure standpoint, because even if you're just like into big loads,
what we do know is that larger ejaculatory volume often
(17:18):
translates to more intense orgasms. Right, you have to have
more contraction to get all that fluid out. We wanted
to create a product that could change all these various
aspects of semen health and improve sex and orgasm for people.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
That is truly amazing. It's like not something I knew
was available or thought of, And I'm like, now, I
think I need to definitely want to give it a No,
I definitely need Okay, So if we could ask you
a personal and very subjective question, what is your favorite.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
Part of your job being able to provide solutions for
patients to just have better sex in general. Like, it's
such an important part of our lives. There's a lot
of people that just like give up because they think
there's something wrong with them, there's something wrong with their relationship.
They've reached a certain age in which like they need
to like ride off into the sunset and forget about sex.
(18:07):
But the reality is is, like it improves mood, it
helps people sleep, it decreases stress, it lowers blood pressure. Like,
there are so many benefits to sex. Why should anybody
kind of give up on that. You know, I've seen
people's marriages saved. I've seen them get off an antidepressant
because we like provide them with, you know, the hormone
(18:29):
that they were deficient in, or provide them an ability
to like have better and more fulfilling sex, and suddenly
they're not depressed anymore. So, like, being able to have
those like remarkable impacts on someone's.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
Life is what keeps me coming to the office every day.
It's fascinating stuff. Well, thank you so much, doctor Gonzalez
for joining us today. This has been yeah, one of them, Yeah,
most informative interviews we've got where can people find you
online or in person if they'd like to sign up
for an appointment.
Speaker 4 (18:59):
I'm on on Instagram and TikTok and YouTube at Joshua
Gonzalez MD. I do a lot of like content creation
related to sexual health, so people can get free information there,
although it's not considered real medical advice. If they need
my help in real life, they can contact us through
those platforms or contact my office directly. My website is
(19:22):
Joshua Gonzalez empty dot com, so pretty easy. And then
you know, if they're interested in learning more about pop
Star and kind of what we're doing popstar Labs dot
com or at Popstar Labs on social platforms.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
Awesome, Well, thank you so much.
Speaker 3 (19:35):
Well, we've been all over dick this segment, so when
we come back, it's time to dive deep into butt.
Well finally, yeah, with New York's most famous gay taxologist,
Evan gold Stein.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
Workers and Confessions after the break.
Speaker 1 (19:50):
All right, if you're someone having anal sex in New
York City or even beyond the New York City limits,
you've surely seen our next guest online or perhaps in
his Greenwich Village office, Doctor Ivan Goldstein is one of
the leading butt doctors that's a proctologist in layman's terms
in the Big Apple.
Speaker 3 (20:05):
He recently published an incredible new manual, but seriously, The
Definitive Guide to Antal Health, Pleasure and Everything in Between,
which is available in stores and online.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
Now I'm going to say I really love the title.
Please welcome to Cruisy Confessions, Dr Goldstein.
Speaker 6 (20:20):
Thanks for having me.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Absolutely thanks for being here. So glad you're here.
Speaker 3 (20:23):
It's like, I don't know I'm meeting a celebrity, right.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
I have seen you on my Instagram feeds so much.
You like we know each other. I'm like, oh, just
having a friend coming into the office today and I
was like, we have never met, but yeah, you're doing
great work.
Speaker 2 (20:40):
I've actually we've gotten to enjoy the fruits of your labor.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
After folks come out of your office and we've got
to say you have made the community better.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
I was going to say, thank you, Yeah, thank you absolutely.
Speaker 1 (20:57):
So I would love to kick us off by talking
about your new book. And I loved one of the
opening lines where you mentioned that you've worked with a
lot of assholes, but they're usually attached to.
Speaker 2 (21:06):
Very nice people, very much Yeah, I like that.
Speaker 1 (21:11):
So I'm curious what prompted you to write this book
and how did you start the journey writing it?
Speaker 7 (21:15):
Yeah, you know, it was obviously fifteen years in the
making from my practice a bespoke surgical I just felt
like it was time to really start looking at sexual education,
looking at our community and putting it into paper, you know,
and really allowing people access to the care. We take
for granted living in New York, but there are.
Speaker 6 (21:34):
People all over the world, even in major.
Speaker 7 (21:35):
Cities that you would think that would have access to
this type of care, that don't. And a lot of
the issues that I see stems from the lack of
sexual education.
Speaker 6 (21:45):
So it's all about how do we look.
Speaker 7 (21:47):
At myths and taboos, how do we kind of break
down all of the aspects of kind of anatomy, like
what type of ass do you have?
Speaker 2 (21:56):
There are different types, I mean, there are different typs,
there are different types.
Speaker 6 (21:59):
There's three different types as actually.
Speaker 2 (22:02):
Juicy, flat, and medium. Yeah.
Speaker 6 (22:06):
Actually a third of people can just take whatever.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
Wow, Okay, I'm blessed.
Speaker 6 (22:11):
Are you blessed?
Speaker 2 (22:12):
Like that?
Speaker 7 (22:17):
So a third of people, no matter what, can take
and then two thirds have issues and so the issue
is is it too tight, does it relax enough? What's
the psychological and kind of mental state?
Speaker 6 (22:29):
And then of that.
Speaker 7 (22:31):
Two thirds, about half of them needs some surgical intervention
or something like anal botox relaxation, physical therapy to help
people get to where they need to be. So it's
all about using the book to educate, to allow people
to understand what they're looking for. And then if something
were to happen or they can't get to where they
(22:52):
need to be, how do they find an affirming practice me?
Speaker 8 (22:59):
She is that girl to everyone come to me.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (23:07):
It is also nice to know that two thirds of
people are struggling with anal sex.
Speaker 2 (23:10):
Truly, because I was like, babble am, I do we
get wrong? But like.
Speaker 1 (23:17):
You know, there's some moments where I'm like, flop, we're
going right in. I didn't even clean like wonderful. As
I mentioned, I'm what I like to call a full
moon bottom. Once every lunar cycle, I will get the
urge I turn into a werewolf and then I go
back to being like maybe not today, but it has
been It's been really difficult. I've dealt with fissures a
lot anal sex, no matter how much Loube I use.
So I think that's been something that has discouraged me
(23:37):
from exploring that that side of sex a lot more.
Speaker 7 (23:40):
Yeah, you know, I mean I think a lot of
people fall into the same camp.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
You know.
Speaker 7 (23:44):
The issue for me is anal Sex is not overtly
very complicated. Right, It's three components. It's basically skin, it's muscle,
and it's this right, the mind and those three all
have to work together. But if you're having fissures, you're
probably probably a little bit tighter on the muscular side.
And so the key is like, and you're exactly the
(24:05):
person that does get injured a lot because the full
moon thing, it needs to be like one to two
times a week. And if you're not, and if you're not,
like from a partner perspective, you can dilate, use toys,
keep it. It's like a use it or lose it
type of aspect, especially with you.
Speaker 2 (24:26):
Well, this is a it's I mean, it's really true.
The practice helps a lot.
Speaker 1 (24:28):
I remember the first time I ever bought themed was
during relationship in college and my partner went to a
sex shop and bought me one of those tiny prostate stimulators.
He was like, this might be a great way to start,
and they got bigger and bigger. He bought the pack
with the sizes, they got bigger, and I will say
it was a great way to sort of ease into it.
And it helped this part a lot because I had
never done it. I was like, I think it's going
to be painful. I don't like it. And it was pleasurable,
(24:51):
but it took a bit of effort and again very
consistent practice to feel comfortable doing it consistently.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Yeah, I mean I.
Speaker 7 (24:57):
Think, you know, people think that bleeding is appropriate. People
think that pain is appropriate for anal sex, and that's
obviously myths. And that's what we talk about from the
book perspective of like how do you look at what
we're told to really understand the aspects of what really
should happen. You shouldn't bleed, it shouldn't be painful. There's
going to be discomfort in the beginning in terms of learning.
(25:18):
But people think you could go from nothing to the
big d right away, and again we said two thirds
of people can't do that. So understanding that there's three
sets of muscles in everybody's ass. Two if you squeeze
your hole right now, you're squeezing two out of the three.
The third one is the one like that We've all
topped people where we're like they're like, oh, I'm relaxed,
(25:39):
and I'm like, yeah, but I can't get my dicking
your ass.
Speaker 6 (25:42):
That third muscle, huh.
Speaker 7 (25:44):
That is the one that is usually tighter in many people,
and it takes a little while to learn how to
potentially relax that, and sometimes you can't. And then that's
where I come in terms of physical therapy, anal botach
which relies as is that third muscle, which then allows
you to start dilating and stretching like a rubber band
(26:06):
to get to whatever you want in the world.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
I am curious.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
You give a lot of advice in the book as
medical professional, but I'm wondering if there was anything you learned.
Speaker 2 (26:14):
About yourself during the process of writing the book.
Speaker 6 (26:17):
Oh about my ass?
Speaker 1 (26:18):
You mean any aspect, but I'm particularly interested in asse
is given the subject matter today.
Speaker 2 (26:24):
Yeah, it's whatever you want to shoore.
Speaker 7 (26:26):
I know, yeah, well, no, I mean in the book,
it goes over some of my journeys of suffering from fissures.
You know, in our twenties we don't eat well, we're
not shitting the right way.
Speaker 6 (26:36):
We're just not taking care of ourselves.
Speaker 7 (26:38):
So then medical school developed a fissure, had surgery couldn't
really bottom started to explore and I was like, oh yeah,
I told my partner and he just shove it in.
Speaker 6 (26:47):
It's totally fine. And then that did not go over
very well.
Speaker 7 (26:51):
So a lot of this is in the book of
kind of that I'm part of the team, right, you know,
And I'm part of like understanding that when you take
away the bottoming aspect to someone that wants to bottom,
it's totally catastrophic, you know, and it can really ruin
people's lives.
Speaker 6 (27:06):
Their relationships, and so much more.
Speaker 7 (27:09):
And that was the impetus of writing the book, but
also my practice, which is to be like, you know,
what I do is not rocket science, it's not.
Speaker 6 (27:16):
But it's understanding the community. It's understanding like.
Speaker 7 (27:18):
What people want to do, and then saying, well, wait
a second, we have one life. I don't care what
the fuck you shove up your ass, Like, let's just
do it safely, bring the risk as low as possible,
and then if something were to happen, have a safe
place that you can access and that's kind of what
we built over the years.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
What are some of the most common issues that people
visit your office for.
Speaker 7 (27:39):
I think most is the tearing. You know, people having
external skin irritation. His skin is thin, especially in women
and also in trans male to female that are taking estrogens.
The skin becomes so thin and friable that it can tear,
and people don't warm up and they use spit as
lube and they're not, you know, dilating the right way,
(28:01):
and the top doesn't know what the fuck they're doing,
and they're just shoving it in and they're choosing a
position that's not optimal for the first go around.
Speaker 6 (28:09):
So a lot of it is the tearing.
Speaker 7 (28:11):
I think a lot of also stems from just being overtight,
where they're like, I just can't relax, I just don't
feel comfortable. And then the aesthetic stuff of like, you know,
someone was licking my ass and they're like, what's that?
Speaker 2 (28:23):
You know?
Speaker 7 (28:24):
And then we're all and then they're like, well, what
is it?
Speaker 1 (28:28):
Okay, yeah, I can't see it ingrown hair war, what's happening?
Speaker 6 (28:34):
If I show you my fucking d MS, it's like.
Speaker 7 (28:36):
Ass and you oh my god, all the time, they're like,
can you just look at this thing?
Speaker 2 (28:42):
Like what is this? And I'm like, I can't give
medical advice Instagram.
Speaker 6 (28:46):
I'll meet you where you are. You're sending me your
aspects relater absolutely not so sure.
Speaker 1 (28:57):
We're gonna go pick our favorites to send later narrow
it down to your top three.
Speaker 7 (29:03):
But I think the aesthetic stuff is you know again,
it's I see it all the time where people I'm
second third opinions where they go to, you know, the
typical elderly white proctologist that's like, well why do you.
Speaker 6 (29:15):
Care how it looks?
Speaker 7 (29:16):
You know, and you're like, well, I get fucked, I lick,
I play, and like I do get.
Speaker 2 (29:22):
And I do care or it matters for your work.
Speaker 6 (29:24):
That's right, totally.
Speaker 7 (29:25):
And so that's a lot of what we do in
the office, including you know, from the tightness stuff anal botox,
and how do we get people to relax in the
right way.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
What is the optimal first position?
Speaker 7 (29:36):
I think it's trying to choose a position that you're
more in control. So I really like just the top,
like you being on top, you know, so like just
get get the top actually hard, and then you're just
sitting on them kind of like a dilator because you
can adjust, you can kind of navigate how deep you're going,
you're facing the person so that you can be communicative, right,
(29:58):
and you could see like am I.
Speaker 6 (29:59):
Grim is saying, is he is he enjoying am I?
Speaker 7 (30:01):
And those types of approaches. You know, in the book
we go over all different positions and we rate them
from different peaches one peach, two peach, three peaches to
get a little bit more advanced, but it just goes over,
you know, using dilators before lube shooters. I'm a huge
fan of I think silicon based lube for anal is
(30:22):
really still the best because of the lubricity. And then
it's again choosing and any position you can be in control.
But I usually say, especially if you're new to bottoming,
choose a partner that you are really entrusting with you
know that you're able to communicate, because a lot of
people we just don't communicate and saying okay, how do
we navigate that? And I think some of the limitations
(30:44):
is for the bottom to also be empowered to be
like this doesn't feel right. I don't want to hurt myself,
your dick is just way too big. It was bigger
than I you know, and grinder it was a little smaller.
Speaker 6 (30:55):
I can't take.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
Yeah, it was like the picture was not next to
the Coca cola bottle.
Speaker 6 (30:59):
That like, your face looks different.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
And if I had, if I had a nickel, I'd
have a whole roll of nickels to shove up my totally.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
That would be about the right size. It would be
the right size for me to start off, honestly like that.
I just need a little nickel with and then we
can work our way up to quarters. It'll be great.
Speaker 1 (31:23):
It's interesting talking about the anal botox. I always assumed
that uh, using inno botox was cosmetic, right, that it
would like make the whole look right, But yeah, exactly
right that my wringled hole, yes, like yeah, but I'm
curious it's uh, I guess the way it's interacting with
(31:44):
the muscles is actually like the primary reason is to
help relaxes totally.
Speaker 7 (31:48):
I mean it's a treatment for anal fissures. It's a
treatment for pelvic floor issues. Too tight, I can't get
full relaxation. So yeah, it's covered by insurance, which is amazing.
People have access to this and it really works wonders.
I mean it brings people so much toy that you're
able to now pull them.
Speaker 6 (32:08):
And I say, think of like the rubber those big
rubber bands.
Speaker 7 (32:11):
Right when you get the big rubber band and you
try to open it, you're like, fuck, it's not happening.
But if every day you were to do a little bit,
that rubber band starts to stretch. The problem is is
that people that have fissures or their asses too tight,
they can't even get to the part where they're using
the toys correctly. So by giving botox, now they're like, oh,
(32:32):
I am relaxed. Oh, and now they start the positive
feedback loop and then they can actually dilate correctly, so
that now people are able to get to where they
need to be. And most people are like, all right,
am I going to fart and shit on the street.
The answer is, you'll have a little bit more gas. No,
you shouldn't shit.
Speaker 6 (32:49):
On the street.
Speaker 7 (32:50):
I usually say people like, you know, in the beginning,
it's a new asshole. So if you feel like you
have to go poop.
Speaker 2 (32:55):
Just do it.
Speaker 6 (32:55):
Just go poop it until yeah, just don't trust that.
Speaker 1 (32:59):
We did not first episode, we had a come dump,
come in and be like I think his best piece
of advice was never trust a far after you've been bred.
Speaker 7 (33:07):
And that's that's also what's known as refractory period, where
like some people after they get bottomed, they can just
become tight again.
Speaker 6 (33:14):
And many others cannot.
Speaker 7 (33:16):
Where it takes hours, sometimes twelve hours, twenty four hours,
it can be where you're right, you can definitely potentially get.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
When you're sitting on the subway in your show, I'll
leave that on the seat.
Speaker 6 (33:28):
Anal boat talks. You know, people think that you're gonna
need to do it for the rest of your life.
You don't.
Speaker 7 (33:34):
Most people do it two to three sessions. It lasts
about three to four months. I do it in the
office with you awake. You don't need There are deffinitent
people that put people to sleep for this. I don't
think it's necessary one bit. And it, you know, starts
to fully work in about five to seven days, and
it decreases the pressure enough that now you can start
(33:54):
to actually do what you need to do. And then
during that we're able to really see our right. Do
I need to work with the skin? How do I
toughen it? How do I create more you know, flexibility
in that space, and so we go over a lot
using the dilators, but also what's called the cone dilator.
What happens with the cone is it starts to stretch
the skin more, which is where a lot of people,
(34:17):
you know, the first thing we hit is the skin,
So the top is hitting the skin, and if the
skin doesn't have the force right, it'll split if it
can't take that pressure. And also if it opens way
too fast and it's not strong enough, what happens is
it tears. So the key is to really work that
and make sure that you're stretching the skin as well.
(34:37):
So there's you know, I say it's not complicated, but
there's there's a lot.
Speaker 1 (34:41):
There's a lot that goes into a It's not rocket sized,
but it definitely is like physics, it's all about pressure pressure.
Speaker 3 (34:51):
And for our listeners, you've actually used the botox for
your yeah?
Speaker 2 (34:55):
Have you not? Yeah? Yeah, it's hard to do.
Speaker 6 (34:59):
It's hard to do it yourself.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
I'm like, what does it even look like like shaving?
I'm really flexible, so I can make those things happen.
Speaker 1 (35:07):
Do you use it?
Speaker 3 (35:08):
Just like I just pulled the leg up and go yeah, okay,
we got to.
Speaker 6 (35:13):
Get your legs, your leg up all the way that
go on.
Speaker 2 (35:15):
It's amazing.
Speaker 6 (35:16):
That should be an episode in and of it.
Speaker 1 (35:19):
No, that's years of dance training. Okay, do not try
to lift your leg behind your head, please don't.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
I have and it is very painful.
Speaker 1 (35:28):
Yeah, I'm curious this is we don't often talk to
doctors whore very open about using some of the procedures
they do themselves.
Speaker 7 (35:33):
So yeah, yeah, I mean I think a lot of
it was from a fizzer perspective of paddow.
Speaker 6 (35:37):
And again tight ass totally type AM like total type A.
Speaker 7 (35:42):
And again, what's interesting when you see bottom starting to
navigate bottoming early meaning fifteen sixteen, seventeen eighteen, the muscles
are not fully developed that you're actually able to train
the muscles quite well.
Speaker 5 (35:56):
But a lot of.
Speaker 6 (35:57):
People like I came out later in life.
Speaker 7 (35:59):
I was in my third and you're already kind of
in your way, and you could see a lot of
those people have reticent issues as it relates to bottoming.
Speaker 6 (36:08):
But functionally there's limitations.
Speaker 7 (36:10):
So again, by doing anal BOATOX when it's necessary, and
then you can actually start dilating. I mean for me,
you know, I use a toy once or twice a
week in the shower. It doesn't even need to be sexual,
like like literally just put the toy and like ten
times in and out and that's it. And like what
you'll notice is that it just helps with shitting. And
(36:30):
then like even when you're dance and especially a lot
of dancers have pelvic floor issues because their core right
is now really changing the way the pelvis is functioning.
So toy work and dilating. So again I don't do
I don't need boattox now, thankfully.
Speaker 9 (36:48):
To get to the second Thursday, it's actually mondays, I
was like, damn.
Speaker 6 (37:00):
I work from home.
Speaker 2 (37:01):
On there we go.
Speaker 10 (37:05):
Yeah, the picture, So how big was it this moment?
Speaker 2 (37:19):
I have mine in the shower that just like lives
on the back of my shower wall.
Speaker 3 (37:22):
Yeah yeah, and it just like lives there and it
just is a little reminder, Oh you should do that thing, yes,
just like going to the gym.
Speaker 7 (37:28):
Totally and and it changes your world because again and
then like you know, again, I say to people like
sometimes you're arched over right, and then someone says.
Speaker 6 (37:36):
Oh, you're archiving. You kind of but a lot of
people don't know how to actually reset their back right.
Speaker 7 (37:41):
But again, the same thing anally, all day we're sitting
ninety nine percent where we're contracted right, and you don't
know how to actually concentrate and relax the whole right,
relax your pelvis. That's where toy work comes into play.
And we talk a lot about that specifically in the
book of like really learning that in that me to
get you into the sweetest spot of where you want
(38:02):
to go.
Speaker 3 (38:03):
So what are things that people are doing at home
that they should not be doing? I know on your
Instagram you've talked about whites.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 7 (38:10):
I keep getting yelled at for my comments of whites
because people love wipes. Yeah, wet wipes are really terrible.
They should be banned. I mean, you know, are you
using you a wet wipe user?
Speaker 9 (38:20):
You fucking are?
Speaker 2 (38:21):
I am a reformed Are you still using them? What
do you mean? No? I used to.
Speaker 1 (38:26):
I use them for years until I got a little
a bidet for my toilet And.
Speaker 2 (38:30):
Yeah, but I don't have a day everywhere I go,
I know.
Speaker 7 (38:32):
But the thing is is that, like, you know, our
skin is really good with like the good bacteria and
the bad bacteria. And it's not to say that I
want you to have like shit in your ass, but
like it needs a little bit of cajeeling, you know,
it needs that.
Speaker 6 (38:46):
The problem is is that the wet wipes.
Speaker 2 (38:49):
Eat a little redsid in there.
Speaker 6 (38:51):
So the issue is the wet wipes.
Speaker 7 (38:53):
I don't know is it the fabric, is it the moisture,
or is it the actual solution, but it changes microbiome.
I see a ton of anal warts and herpies from
wet wipes, and literally I'll look at the ass or
if they DM me the picture and I'll be like,
do you use wet wipes? And they're like yes. I'm
like stop that. That's the first thing. And it's crazy.
Speaker 8 (39:19):
You're about to discover so many things you have not
seen with the leg right the good. You're fine, but
maybe there is something wrong with me.
Speaker 6 (39:30):
But wet wipes is one that should be stopped.
Speaker 7 (39:33):
I think again, a lot of people do nair and
or are shaving, and I get it. I think the
problem is like all of those, what happens is the
hair follicle is still present. So I see a lot
of acne. I see a lot of ingrown hairs. And
then also if you have like coarse hair like you
and I do, especially what happens is when it starts
(39:54):
to grow back, you start getting so much friction, especially
from a sex perspective. So we talk a lot about
like laser hair removal and how to, and nowadays it
really gets the gamut of all different skin types, because
back in the day it was like only whites.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
It was like, let's it.
Speaker 7 (40:08):
No, Now we have the technology to really get people
to where they want to be. Even sometimes I tell
people to thin if they don't want to be so smooth,
because some people don't like all smooth and then.
Speaker 6 (40:19):
Crazy hair, right, which I get it.
Speaker 7 (40:21):
So now we're even doing some thinning approaches so that
you don't have as much irritation. You don't have to
use crazy wet wipes because shit gets stuck in your
ass hair that type of thing, right, And we're kind
of creating an environment that's less acne prone in other issues.
And then I think other stuff that people are doing incorrectly.
They're just not listening to their body, you know, and
(40:43):
they're just like, you know, if they're in pain, and
it's five out of ten and they're like, well, fuck it,
I'm just going to kind of plow through the bottoming
session and then it just starts leading to more and
more and more potential issues. Some people do oil based
lubes or they're using like coconut oil, and I get it.
Speaker 6 (41:00):
It's like sexy and fun and massaging.
Speaker 7 (41:02):
But the problem is it causes a lot of the
same issues that douching with water or douching with enemies does.
It actually changes the internal microbiome, and so we have
so if we and I go on the street, this
is the street segment, We're going to do this next time,
and I'll swap ten random people and be like, I
bet you I can tell you that you take it
up the ass. Because there's a specific bacteria that is
(41:25):
in us that is only from bottoming. It's a special
population of what's called provatella.
Speaker 6 (41:31):
But it's because it's.
Speaker 1 (41:35):
Called provotella, but my favorite.
Speaker 6 (41:42):
That's fucking awesome.
Speaker 7 (41:44):
But again, all of that is about how do we
use the right solutions right, How do we use something
that's not toxic, how do we use the appropriate looves,
how do you stay away from the home remedies?
Speaker 6 (41:55):
Again, if it's there and you need something great.
Speaker 7 (41:58):
We'll support it, but I think again it's kind of
making choices that are appropriate for you and your partners.
Speaker 1 (42:04):
All right, doctor Goldstein, I gotta say this has been
so much fun. It has been very hot and very informative.
Speaker 2 (42:08):
Where can people find you online?
Speaker 6 (42:10):
For me, it's a d R.
Speaker 7 (42:11):
Evan Goldstein, Doctor goldstand and all the channels, the surgical practices,
Bespoke Surgical. The Future Method is the Future Method on
Instagram and future method dot com, and then the book,
but Seriously is everywhere launching.
Speaker 6 (42:26):
It's amazing. We're super excited.
Speaker 7 (42:28):
And then there's a website dedicated to that as well,
so check it out.
Speaker 2 (42:32):
Amazing, amazing, Thank you absolutely, thank you for being here.
Speaker 1 (42:35):
And please try not to flood doctor Goldsteine with your buffets.
Speaker 2 (42:39):
But do you know they might get because I gotta
get mine in first.
Speaker 1 (42:41):
Yeah absolutely, I'm coming in second, next full moon just through.
Speaker 2 (42:46):
A group chat. Yeah like that. Yeah, I got it.
Speaker 1 (42:49):
As doctor Goldstein mentioned, but Seriously is available to order now.
Speaker 3 (42:52):
More Sniffy's cruising Confessions After the break, I jumped my name.
I want to thank our guests today, Dick, doctor Joshua
Gonzalez and but doctor Evan Goldstein. They had been so informative,
(43:14):
really demystifying a lot of what we know about our
dicks and our holes totally.
Speaker 1 (43:18):
I mean, I have learned so much this episode, maybe
the most out of any other. And I also think
that both of these interviews had made me a little
less afraid to try new things yes, or to think
about my body in different ways.
Speaker 2 (43:33):
Well, thank you again for joining us.
Speaker 1 (43:34):
We hope that you have walked away with a ton
of knowledge and felt as emboldened to take care of
your front and back as we have.
Speaker 2 (43:43):
Thanks again for watching.
Speaker 1 (43:44):
Snippy's Cruising Confessions is a production from Outspoken podcast Network
from iHeart Podcasts.
Speaker 2 (43:49):
It's directed by Adam.
Speaker 1 (43:50):
Barron, produced by Stevie Williams and Cameron's Semino, and executive
produced by Eli Martinson. Cruising Confessions is presented by Snippy's,
the ultimate map based cruising cloud. We're forgave by and
curious people ready to cruz. Check out them out at
Sniffy's dot com and follow Snippy's on socials at Sniffy's app.
Speaker 6 (44:08):
Put Joe put Put Joe put Joe puts
Speaker 5 (44:16):
H
Hey, viewers, Sniffy's Cruising Confessions is an explicit podcast about
queer sex, filter dirty words and unfiltered descriptions of sexual activities.
If hearing about orgies, anonymous sex, kink, fetish, and more
offends your sensibilities, you might want to skip this. Viewer
discretion is advised. It's definitely not for kids. So, Chris,
(00:22):
so this is a bit personal.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Have you ever had to go to the doctor for
a problem or concern you were having with your sexual health?
Speaker 2 (00:29):
Are you talking about STIs.
Speaker 1 (00:31):
Like Sti's any cosmetic stuff or cosmetic me? No, I
know you, I know it's all natural. I would not
judge if you had I.
Speaker 2 (00:40):
Don't know what I yeah, I have. What about you? You?
Speaker 1 (00:46):
I mean certainly, I think having sex as a queer
person means you're gonna go to the doctor several times.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
For a lot of things, right, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
And I had a lot of questions, especially in college,
that I never had answered during sexual education in high school.
And I learned a lot of stuf about my health
anecdotally through friends. But I think going to a doctor
really helped kind of like put my mind at ease
regarding some things.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Let's say, it's a perfect world and you can have
anything done to your body. Yeah, and there.
Speaker 2 (01:13):
Was a doctor who could do it, what would you fix?
Speaker 1 (01:15):
I think I'm very happy with my body. Like obviously,
there are moments where I compare myself to other people.
I wish I could maybe look like them. Okay, but
I think I would rather do it through like altering
my work and diet than like getting an implant or
anything like that. That type of like permanent medical procedure
(01:36):
seems like a big commitment for me.
Speaker 3 (01:38):
In this episode, we're exploring the wild new world of
hacking in the bedroom through conversations with two renowned medical professionals.
We specialize in helping men have better sex and feel
better about themselves.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
We've all seen online advertisements for pills or procedures promising
to enhance your erotic adventures. Right spunk supplements, bussy botas,
We've got recreational eed meds, and yeah us penis fillers.
We'll find out all the new ways that you can
take your sex game to the next level, and how
to decide if these biohacks are right and safe for you.
Speaker 2 (02:09):
Welcome to Stiffy's Cruising Confessions. I am Gabe Gonzils.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
I'm Chris Patterson Rosso Each week weeks for the Sublime
World of Queer Sex, Cruising and Relationship.
Speaker 1 (02:19):
We'll be talking to queer folks of all kinds. Ask
them questions, swap sex stories, share intimate revelations.
Speaker 4 (02:24):
A lot of us are discovering ourselves in cruising spaces.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
This happened to me at this toilet stall, in the
library or the airport.
Speaker 5 (02:30):
I feel like everybody's gonna fuck a little harder here.
Speaker 1 (02:32):
Damn.
Speaker 2 (02:33):
So I've been like the neighborhood slot, and I took
pride in that.
Speaker 3 (02:36):
I was so afraid but yet so intrigued, And the
more I gave him, the more he could take.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
If you're having sex on Sniffy's, you already have a
moral deficit.
Speaker 3 (02:50):
Our first guest is the most famous dick doctor in
West Hollywood. Doctor Joshua Gonzalez is a Board certified gay
urologist specializing and inclusive sexual health for all. Doctor Gonzalez
focuses on managing sexual dyspunctionions and members of the LGBTQUI
plus community.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
Doctor Gonzalez is also the founder of pop Star Supplements,
a medical supplement which promises to improve the volume and
taste of your semen.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
All right, let's welcome doctor Gonzalez. So let's start at
the beginning. How did you get into this work?
Speaker 4 (03:20):
Well, I followed my passion for DIX. I said, how
can I monetize this?
Speaker 2 (03:24):
Yeah, we asked ourselves. You chose this.
Speaker 5 (03:30):
Exactly.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
When I went to medical school, I wasn't really sure
what kind of physician I wanted to be. I was
kind of drawn to urology. I just really liked working
in the sexual health space. It was a way to
kind of make a big difference.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
I think a lot of what I learned about queer
sexual health was sort of anecdotal through friends. Having not
just doctors that specialize in these fields, but queer doctors
that also have the lived experience to kind of understand
where you're coming from and approach to work without stigma
is really really important.
Speaker 4 (03:54):
The total number of hours dedicated to LGBTQ plus topics
in four years of medical school was five hours. WHOA,
And so I wanted to make sure that when I
started my practice that I could be a resource for
people who needed guidance from somebody in their own community.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
What do you find is the most common sexual health
problem that people come to you with questions about or
seeking treatment for.
Speaker 5 (04:15):
The big ones are things like a rectile dysfunction.
Speaker 4 (04:18):
We do testosterone replacement therapy for people with low testosterone
see a lot of low libido, low sexual desire, steroid
induced sexual dysfunction, which is a real thing.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
I honestly don't know the answer to this question. What
is the rectile dysfunction and what causes it?
Speaker 5 (04:35):
That's a great question.
Speaker 4 (04:35):
Yeah, a rectil dysfunction, like textbook definition, is the inability
to achieve or maintain an erection long enough to complete
textual activity.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
What is that length of time? Also, like, so what's
the average just so I.
Speaker 4 (04:50):
Know, Yeah, yeah, it's probably shorter than you think. The
average time to ejaculation in the US, and this is
again mostly based off you know, heterosexual data, is about
five to seven minutes.
Speaker 1 (05:03):
Oh that's a very heterosexual. Oh and that's a heterosexual
length for sure.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
Wow, about seven minutes. Okay.
Speaker 4 (05:09):
I get a lot of patients coming to see me,
you know, thinking that they have premature ejaculation because they
come in like ten to fifteen minutes, and I have
to kind of reset their expectations to help them understand
that doesn't necessarily mean that there's something wrong with them.
But here's some techniques that maybe you could do to
kind of prolong this experience for yourself.
Speaker 1 (05:29):
So I'm curious what does treating erectile dysfunction look like today.
Speaker 4 (05:33):
I want to kind of normalize this as a medical issue, right,
So a lot of work in a rectil dysfunction historically
has has labeled it incorrectly like a condition that happens
to older men. And the reality is is that ED
can happen to somebody at any point in their life,
and the risk of that increases as you get older.
So the statistics show that like thirty percent of guys
(05:56):
in their thirties experience ED at some point, forty percent
in their forties, two percent in their fifties, so it
goes up by about ten percent with each decade of life.
So if you are somebody that happens to be in
their twenties or thirties and has a problem, you know,
performing if you're a young person, that doesn't mean that
there aren't solutions for you. What I do in my
practice is try to figure out why a person is
having that problem.
Speaker 5 (06:15):
So, you know, we do a hormonal evaluation.
Speaker 4 (06:17):
There are like certain hormonal issues that can come up
that can cause problems with your erections. We do an
assessment of someone's erection blood flow. People can have you know,
neurological diseases that can affect their erectile dysfunction. People can
have you know, psychological factors performance, anxiety, stress, grief. You
kind of have to be comprehensive when you're trying to
(06:38):
figure out a solution for someone and and a little
bit of time figuring out what exactly is causing the problem.
Once we know that, there's a lot of different options,
so we can put people on different hormonal treatments. We
can offer them viagracils and the like. There's injection therapy
like tri mix or by mix. There's regenerative therapies that
we do here in the office where we energy based
(07:02):
shockwave therapy or substances like platelet rich plasma to restore
the function and help regenerate the erectile tissue to improve performance.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
Can you talk to me more about this PRP.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
It was described to us as the Kim Kardashian blood thing,
the vampire facial.
Speaker 4 (07:18):
So the vampire facial basically just refer to people like
Kim doing micro needling on their face, right, and then
they use PRP and like rub it on the face
so it gets into the pores from like the microtrauma
that's created from the micro needling, literally your.
Speaker 5 (07:34):
Own blood spun.
Speaker 4 (07:36):
And then we extract the plasma portion of it, which
has platelets and growth factors in it, and then use
it to help regenerate some part of your body. Right,
So in the vampire facial it's to promote collagen and
a last in production in your face, which makes you
look tighter and brighter. In the penis, we injected into
the corporal tissue, the erectile tissue to help improve blood
(07:58):
flow to that area and help improve the function of
that direction tissue.
Speaker 5 (08:01):
So it's a very safe treatment.
Speaker 4 (08:03):
There's really other than like the injections themselves, which are
minimally uncomfortable.
Speaker 5 (08:08):
There's really not any risk associated with it.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Wow, Yeah, I think up until very recently, I was like, Oh,
people can take a pill and that's about it, and
that's it. Yeah, those were the options. I wanted to
shift gears here a bit because you talked earlier about
testosterone replacement therapy. How and when should somebody go about
diagnosing if they're having testosterone loss and what does this
treatment hope to achieve.
Speaker 4 (08:27):
Low t is something that historically in medicine has been
thought of, like as something that only impacts older men,
and as with a retel dysfunction, it is more common
in older men, but it can happen to anybody at
any age, and there's sometimes reasons.
Speaker 5 (08:43):
We don't know why.
Speaker 4 (08:44):
You know, a twenty five year old guy walks through
my door and we measure his blood and it shows
low testosterone. But we do know that globally testosterone levels
have been declining for the last fifty years, so there
must be environmental factors that even if you're somebody that
like leads a healthy lifestyle and you know, is exercising
(09:05):
and eating well and sleeping, there are certain things in
our environment we cannot control. When we see somebody who
has symptoms of low testosterone, which can be everything from
you know, low energy or chronic fatigue to low sexual desire.
Sometimes men will describe brain fog or trouble with cognitive.
Speaker 5 (09:24):
Function remembering words, memory that kind.
Speaker 4 (09:26):
Of stuff, depressed mood, increased anxiety, trouble kind of building
muscle or keeping off body fat or losing weights despite
you know, exercising regularly and eating healthy, to erectile dysfunction.
All of those things can be associated with low testosterone.
So anytime I'm seeing somebody with those symptoms, it's a
pretty easy thing to screen for.
Speaker 5 (09:46):
It's just a blood test. I think.
Speaker 4 (09:47):
The other problem with how testosterone replacement therapy and other
hormonal treatments are offered to patients is that practitioners are
very stringent about what is normal and abnormal. And the
range of normal of testosterone is pretty wide because it
covers men from adolescents until death, right.
Speaker 5 (10:03):
But if you're a.
Speaker 4 (10:04):
Young man and you have a low normal testosterone, there's
a pretty good chance that if you were able to
get that number in the middle to the higher part
of that normal range, you would feel better, a lot
of your symptoms would get better. We very routinely offer
patients in a low normal range treatments to improve that number,
and a lot of those men will end up feeling better.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
I was just going to ask about some of the
side effects of TRT.
Speaker 5 (10:28):
Testosterone replacement therapy is very safe.
Speaker 4 (10:31):
We have like decades, I'm talking seventy eighty years of
data showing that testosterone replacement therapy again when monitored, is
a safe treatment.
Speaker 2 (10:40):
It is a.
Speaker 4 (10:41):
Treatment that involves gels or creams that are applied transdermally
they could absorb through the skin.
Speaker 5 (10:47):
Those are generally done every day.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
There is an injectable testosterone that you can inject either
subcutaneously or intramuscularly, and those are generally done once a
week or sometimes twice week. There are pellets that we
can implant in the office here that go under the
skin through like a tall in office procedure that lasts
for three months. And then the newest form of testosterone
that we've actually been prescribing a lot more recently is
(11:11):
an oral form. It is a short acting testosterone and
the reason that we like it, especially for a lot
of our younger patients, is that one of the side
effects is that your testicles can sometimes shrink in size
our testicular atrophy. And that happens because your testicular volume
is made up of cells that make testosterone and they
(11:32):
make sperm, and when you are supplying your body with
an external form of testosterone, your testicle sort of sees
that and is like, well, we don't really have to
do work right now, so your balls literally shrink, and
as you can imagine, that is distressing to a lot
of people. This new form of oral testosterone doesn't seem
to have as much of an effect on testicular size.
(11:54):
In some men, certain forms of testosterone replacement therapy can
cause their blood to thicken. It's a bone marrow stimulant
and that if left untreated, can theoretically result in blood clots.
So we have to monitor patients who are on testosterone
replacement therapy to make sure their blood doesn't get too thick.
Some men will, you know, experience some acne if they're
using too much. They might start to see like thinning
(12:17):
of their hair if their testosterone gets to be too high,
but we treat it as a, you know, a real
medical issue.
Speaker 5 (12:22):
We monitor our patients pretty closely.
Speaker 4 (12:24):
They're seeing us every few weeks when we first start
them on a treatment to make sure that their hormone
levels are optimal, and then we start to spread out
their visits. But most people are seeing us at least
twice a year, just to make sure they're doing well
and stable on their regimen.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
I think another area that we see talked about a
lot is a topic of penis size, right, I think
there's a certain preoccupation surrounding that. We all know the
size queens, we love them, we respect their interests. Could
you walk us through what options maybe do exist to
addressing anxiety people might have over penis size. You know,
in the US, the average erect length is five and
(12:58):
a half inches, which which is not what we're used
to seeing important and may not be used to what
we're seeing in real life depending on who you're sleeping with,
but that is the reality. Helping men understand what technically
you know qualifies as like a below advertised penis I
think is important. There are cosmetic procedures, as I mentioned,
that are done. The only one that I really think
(13:21):
is safe and reliable is a substance called hyaluronic acid.
It's what most people are using to inject their face
and lips. It's a substance that occurs in our connective
tissue already, so when used for penile enhancement, provides like
a very natural looking enhancement with very little risk. One
of the tricky parts about doing cosmetic filler in the penis,
(13:44):
unlike injecting the lips or in the face, is that
the penis.
Speaker 5 (13:47):
Is kind of a dynamic part of the body, right,
it changes.
Speaker 4 (13:49):
Shape, it gets bigger, it gets harder, You get retraction
when you're cold or you're working out right, so you
have to account for that when you're doing the treatments
here in the office. And one of the best parts
I think about using hyaluronic acid filler is that if
you get an area where the filler kind of settles
and looks uneven, you can easily correct that by adding
more filler nearby to make it look more even, or
you can actually inject it with a solvent agent that
(14:11):
dissolves the filler so that you can customize it to
make it look even and natural. If you're using silicone,
if you're using PMMA, if you're using some of these
collagen stimulating permanent fillers, if something goes wrong, you can't
fix that unless you're going to undergo some sort of
surgical intervention. So I try to counsel patients that are
(14:33):
interested in these treatments to not go the permanent route,
even though that sounds more appealing for some patients, because
with haluronic acid filler, we're finding that it's lasting three,
four or five years sometimes, so it's a semi permanent
solution that many guys will ultimately be happy with and
carries very little risk.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
I just wanted some clarity for our audience, Like, this
is stuff that you should be doing with a doctor,
not necessarily at home.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Correct.
Speaker 4 (14:59):
Yeah, I think if you're thinking about altering the shape
or size of your penis, you really should be doing
that in the context of a healthcare provider who knows
what they're doing, who has a lot of experience doing it.
You know, I wouldn't go to have filler in my
face done by, you know, a gynecologist, and I wouldn't
want and vice versa, right, Like I want to go
(15:21):
to a plastics person or a dermatologist who is familiar
with facial anatomy and does these kinds of injections all
the time.
Speaker 5 (15:27):
And I think the same should be true for penile filler, right, Like, I.
Speaker 4 (15:30):
Don't know that the same dermatologists that's like great at
doing lips is the right person to be doing penises.
Speaker 5 (15:37):
Yeah, they're very different. It's not the same thing.
Speaker 4 (15:40):
I might be biased when I'm saying this because I'm
a urologist, but like, we literally spent years of our
life studying the penis anatomy. We know all of the
vital structures, we know how it works, we know how
to avoid causing damage. Like, that's the kind of person
that I want injecting my dick if I'm going to
get an enhancement.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
So I'm curious.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
I wanted to move on to something we addressed earlier
in the episode pop Star Supplements, I think I've heard about.
I'm truly so intrigued. A lot of folks are very
fixated on like big loads. I'm curious what sort of
need Popstar Supplements addresses that you've seen as a doctor,
and how this might be different than other things we've
seen before.
Speaker 5 (16:17):
The pop Star story is unique.
Speaker 4 (16:19):
So it is a company that my business partner and
I started. I had just been seeing a lot of
you guys who would ask me if there was anything
that they could do to make their loads bigger, And
when we were kind of formulating this plan, thought well,
why don't we create a supplement that kind of hits
all of the aspects of seamen health. So we wanted
(16:40):
to make volume bigger. We wanted to put ingredients in
there that supported sperm health in case someone was interested
in maximizing their fertility potential. And then we were like,
wouldn't it be cool if we could like affect the taste, right.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
This is why we need a queer doctors. Yes, please,
thank you.
Speaker 4 (16:56):
Yeah, so you know, I mean that's one of the
other complaints that people have, even if they like com
is like, well that that particular load didn't taste the greatest,
So like, what could we do to like sweeten the
taste as much as possible. We wanted to approach this problem,
which we feel is a real medical issue from a
pleasure standpoint, because even if you're just like into big loads,
what we do know is that larger ejaculatory volume often
(17:18):
translates to more intense orgasms. Right, you have to have
more contraction to get all that fluid out. We wanted
to create a product that could change all these various
aspects of semen health and improve sex and orgasm for people.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
That is truly amazing. It's like not something I knew
was available or thought of, And I'm like, now, I
think I need to definitely want to give it a No,
I definitely need Okay, So if we could ask you
a personal and very subjective question, what is your favorite.
Speaker 4 (17:46):
Part of your job being able to provide solutions for
patients to just have better sex in general. Like, it's
such an important part of our lives. There's a lot
of people that just like give up because they think
there's something wrong with them, there's something wrong with their relationship.
They've reached a certain age in which like they need
to like ride off into the sunset and forget about sex.
(18:07):
But the reality is is, like it improves mood, it
helps people sleep, it decreases stress, it lowers blood pressure. Like,
there are so many benefits to sex. Why should anybody
kind of give up on that. You know, I've seen
people's marriages saved. I've seen them get off an antidepressant
because we like provide them with, you know, the hormone
(18:29):
that they were deficient in, or provide them an ability
to like have better and more fulfilling sex, and suddenly
they're not depressed anymore. So, like, being able to have
those like remarkable impacts on someone's.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
Life is what keeps me coming to the office every day.
It's fascinating stuff. Well, thank you so much, doctor Gonzalez
for joining us today. This has been yeah, one of them, Yeah,
most informative interviews we've got where can people find you
online or in person if they'd like to sign up
for an appointment.
Speaker 4 (18:59):
I'm on on Instagram and TikTok and YouTube at Joshua
Gonzalez MD. I do a lot of like content creation
related to sexual health, so people can get free information there,
although it's not considered real medical advice. If they need
my help in real life, they can contact us through
those platforms or contact my office directly. My website is
(19:22):
Joshua Gonzalez empty dot com, so pretty easy. And then
you know, if they're interested in learning more about pop
Star and kind of what we're doing popstar Labs dot
com or at Popstar Labs on social platforms.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
Awesome, Well, thank you so much.
Speaker 3 (19:35):
Well, we've been all over dick this segment, so when
we come back, it's time to dive deep into butt.
Well finally, yeah, with New York's most famous gay taxologist,
Evan gold Stein.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
Workers and Confessions after the break.
Speaker 1 (19:50):
All right, if you're someone having anal sex in New
York City or even beyond the New York City limits,
you've surely seen our next guest online or perhaps in
his Greenwich Village office, Doctor Ivan Goldstein is one of
the leading butt doctors that's a proctologist in layman's terms
in the Big Apple.
Speaker 3 (20:05):
He recently published an incredible new manual, but seriously, The
Definitive Guide to Antal Health, Pleasure and Everything in Between,
which is available in stores and online.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
Now I'm going to say I really love the title.
Please welcome to Cruisy Confessions, Dr Goldstein.
Speaker 6 (20:20):
Thanks for having me.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Absolutely thanks for being here. So glad you're here.
Speaker 3 (20:23):
It's like, I don't know I'm meeting a celebrity, right.
Speaker 1 (20:27):
I have seen you on my Instagram feeds so much.
You like we know each other. I'm like, oh, just
having a friend coming into the office today and I
was like, we have never met, but yeah, you're doing
great work.
Speaker 2 (20:40):
I've actually we've gotten to enjoy the fruits of your labor.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
After folks come out of your office and we've got
to say you have made the community better.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
I was going to say, thank you, Yeah, thank you absolutely.
Speaker 1 (20:57):
So I would love to kick us off by talking
about your new book. And I loved one of the
opening lines where you mentioned that you've worked with a
lot of assholes, but they're usually attached to.
Speaker 2 (21:06):
Very nice people, very much Yeah, I like that.
Speaker 1 (21:11):
So I'm curious what prompted you to write this book
and how did you start the journey writing it?
Speaker 7 (21:15):
Yeah, you know, it was obviously fifteen years in the
making from my practice a bespoke surgical I just felt
like it was time to really start looking at sexual education,
looking at our community and putting it into paper, you know,
and really allowing people access to the care. We take
for granted living in New York, but there are.
Speaker 6 (21:34):
People all over the world, even in major.
Speaker 7 (21:35):
Cities that you would think that would have access to
this type of care, that don't. And a lot of
the issues that I see stems from the lack of
sexual education.
Speaker 6 (21:45):
So it's all about how do we look.
Speaker 7 (21:47):
At myths and taboos, how do we kind of break
down all of the aspects of kind of anatomy, like
what type of ass do you have?
Speaker 2 (21:56):
There are different types, I mean, there are different typs,
there are different types.
Speaker 6 (21:59):
There's three different types as actually.
Speaker 2 (22:02):
Juicy, flat, and medium. Yeah.
Speaker 6 (22:06):
Actually a third of people can just take whatever.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
Wow, Okay, I'm blessed.
Speaker 6 (22:11):
Are you blessed?
Speaker 2 (22:12):
Like that?
Speaker 7 (22:17):
So a third of people, no matter what, can take
and then two thirds have issues and so the issue
is is it too tight, does it relax enough? What's
the psychological and kind of mental state?
Speaker 6 (22:29):
And then of that.
Speaker 7 (22:31):
Two thirds, about half of them needs some surgical intervention
or something like anal botox relaxation, physical therapy to help
people get to where they need to be. So it's
all about using the book to educate, to allow people
to understand what they're looking for. And then if something
were to happen or they can't get to where they
(22:52):
need to be, how do they find an affirming practice me?
Speaker 8 (22:59):
She is that girl to everyone come to me.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (23:07):
It is also nice to know that two thirds of
people are struggling with anal sex.
Speaker 2 (23:10):
Truly, because I was like, babble am, I do we
get wrong? But like.
Speaker 1 (23:17):
You know, there's some moments where I'm like, flop, we're
going right in. I didn't even clean like wonderful. As
I mentioned, I'm what I like to call a full
moon bottom. Once every lunar cycle, I will get the
urge I turn into a werewolf and then I go
back to being like maybe not today, but it has
been It's been really difficult. I've dealt with fissures a
lot anal sex, no matter how much Loube I use.
So I think that's been something that has discouraged me
(23:37):
from exploring that that side of sex a lot more.
Speaker 7 (23:40):
Yeah, you know, I mean I think a lot of
people fall into the same camp.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
You know.
Speaker 7 (23:44):
The issue for me is anal Sex is not overtly
very complicated. Right, It's three components. It's basically skin, it's muscle,
and it's this right, the mind and those three all
have to work together. But if you're having fissures, you're
probably probably a little bit tighter on the muscular side.
And so the key is like, and you're exactly the
(24:05):
person that does get injured a lot because the full
moon thing, it needs to be like one to two
times a week. And if you're not, and if you're not,
like from a partner perspective, you can dilate, use toys,
keep it. It's like a use it or lose it
type of aspect, especially with you.
Speaker 2 (24:26):
Well, this is a it's I mean, it's really true.
The practice helps a lot.
Speaker 1 (24:28):
I remember the first time I ever bought themed was
during relationship in college and my partner went to a
sex shop and bought me one of those tiny prostate stimulators.
He was like, this might be a great way to start,
and they got bigger and bigger. He bought the pack
with the sizes, they got bigger, and I will say
it was a great way to sort of ease into it.
And it helped this part a lot because I had
never done it. I was like, I think it's going
to be painful. I don't like it. And it was pleasurable,
(24:51):
but it took a bit of effort and again very
consistent practice to feel comfortable doing it consistently.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Yeah, I mean I.
Speaker 7 (24:57):
Think, you know, people think that bleeding is appropriate. People
think that pain is appropriate for anal sex, and that's
obviously myths. And that's what we talk about from the
book perspective of like how do you look at what
we're told to really understand the aspects of what really
should happen. You shouldn't bleed, it shouldn't be painful. There's
going to be discomfort in the beginning in terms of learning.
(25:18):
But people think you could go from nothing to the
big d right away, and again we said two thirds
of people can't do that. So understanding that there's three
sets of muscles in everybody's ass. Two if you squeeze
your hole right now, you're squeezing two out of the three.
The third one is the one like that We've all
topped people where we're like they're like, oh, I'm relaxed,
(25:39):
and I'm like, yeah, but I can't get my dicking
your ass.
Speaker 6 (25:42):
That third muscle, huh.
Speaker 7 (25:44):
That is the one that is usually tighter in many people,
and it takes a little while to learn how to
potentially relax that, and sometimes you can't. And then that's
where I come in terms of physical therapy, anal botach
which relies as is that third muscle, which then allows
you to start dilating and stretching like a rubber band
(26:06):
to get to whatever you want in the world.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
I am curious.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
You give a lot of advice in the book as
medical professional, but I'm wondering if there was anything you learned.
Speaker 2 (26:14):
About yourself during the process of writing the book.
Speaker 6 (26:17):
Oh about my ass?
Speaker 1 (26:18):
You mean any aspect, but I'm particularly interested in asse
is given the subject matter today.
Speaker 2 (26:24):
Yeah, it's whatever you want to shoore.
Speaker 7 (26:26):
I know, yeah, well, no, I mean in the book,
it goes over some of my journeys of suffering from fissures.
You know, in our twenties we don't eat well, we're
not shitting the right way.
Speaker 6 (26:36):
We're just not taking care of ourselves.
Speaker 7 (26:38):
So then medical school developed a fissure, had surgery couldn't
really bottom started to explore and I was like, oh yeah,
I told my partner and he just shove it in.
Speaker 6 (26:47):
It's totally fine. And then that did not go over
very well.
Speaker 7 (26:51):
So a lot of this is in the book of
kind of that I'm part of the team, right, you know,
And I'm part of like understanding that when you take
away the bottoming aspect to someone that wants to bottom,
it's totally catastrophic, you know, and it can really ruin
people's lives.
Speaker 6 (27:06):
Their relationships, and so much more.
Speaker 7 (27:09):
And that was the impetus of writing the book, but
also my practice, which is to be like, you know,
what I do is not rocket science, it's not.
Speaker 6 (27:16):
But it's understanding the community. It's understanding like.
Speaker 7 (27:18):
What people want to do, and then saying, well, wait
a second, we have one life. I don't care what
the fuck you shove up your ass, Like, let's just
do it safely, bring the risk as low as possible,
and then if something were to happen, have a safe
place that you can access and that's kind of what
we built over the years.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
What are some of the most common issues that people
visit your office for.
Speaker 7 (27:39):
I think most is the tearing. You know, people having
external skin irritation. His skin is thin, especially in women
and also in trans male to female that are taking estrogens.
The skin becomes so thin and friable that it can tear,
and people don't warm up and they use spit as
lube and they're not, you know, dilating the right way,
(28:01):
and the top doesn't know what the fuck they're doing,
and they're just shoving it in and they're choosing a
position that's not optimal for the first go around.
Speaker 6 (28:09):
So a lot of it is the tearing.
Speaker 7 (28:11):
I think a lot of also stems from just being overtight,
where they're like, I just can't relax, I just don't
feel comfortable. And then the aesthetic stuff of like, you know,
someone was licking my ass and they're like, what's that?
Speaker 2 (28:23):
You know?
Speaker 7 (28:24):
And then we're all and then they're like, well, what
is it?
Speaker 1 (28:28):
Okay, yeah, I can't see it ingrown hair war, what's happening?
Speaker 6 (28:34):
If I show you my fucking d MS, it's like.
Speaker 7 (28:36):
Ass and you oh my god, all the time, they're like,
can you just look at this thing?
Speaker 2 (28:42):
Like what is this? And I'm like, I can't give
medical advice Instagram.
Speaker 6 (28:46):
I'll meet you where you are. You're sending me your
aspects relater absolutely not so sure.
Speaker 1 (28:57):
We're gonna go pick our favorites to send later narrow
it down to your top three.
Speaker 7 (29:03):
But I think the aesthetic stuff is you know again,
it's I see it all the time where people I'm
second third opinions where they go to, you know, the
typical elderly white proctologist that's like, well why do you.
Speaker 6 (29:15):
Care how it looks?
Speaker 7 (29:16):
You know, and you're like, well, I get fucked, I lick,
I play, and like I do get.
Speaker 2 (29:22):
And I do care or it matters for your work.
Speaker 6 (29:24):
That's right, totally.
Speaker 7 (29:25):
And so that's a lot of what we do in
the office, including you know, from the tightness stuff anal botox,
and how do we get people to relax in the
right way.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
What is the optimal first position?
Speaker 7 (29:36):
I think it's trying to choose a position that you're
more in control. So I really like just the top,
like you being on top, you know, so like just
get get the top actually hard, and then you're just
sitting on them kind of like a dilator because you
can adjust, you can kind of navigate how deep you're going,
you're facing the person so that you can be communicative, right,
(29:58):
and you could see like am I.
Speaker 6 (29:59):
Grim is saying, is he is he enjoying am I?
Speaker 7 (30:01):
And those types of approaches. You know, in the book
we go over all different positions and we rate them
from different peaches one peach, two peach, three peaches to
get a little bit more advanced, but it just goes over,
you know, using dilators before lube shooters. I'm a huge
fan of I think silicon based lube for anal is
(30:22):
really still the best because of the lubricity. And then
it's again choosing and any position you can be in control.
But I usually say, especially if you're new to bottoming,
choose a partner that you are really entrusting with you
know that you're able to communicate, because a lot of
people we just don't communicate and saying okay, how do
we navigate that? And I think some of the limitations
(30:44):
is for the bottom to also be empowered to be
like this doesn't feel right. I don't want to hurt myself,
your dick is just way too big. It was bigger
than I you know, and grinder it was a little smaller.
Speaker 6 (30:55):
I can't take.
Speaker 1 (30:56):
Yeah, it was like the picture was not next to
the Coca cola bottle.
Speaker 6 (30:59):
That like, your face looks different.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
And if I had, if I had a nickel, I'd
have a whole roll of nickels to shove up my totally.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
That would be about the right size. It would be
the right size for me to start off, honestly like that.
I just need a little nickel with and then we
can work our way up to quarters. It'll be great.
Speaker 1 (31:23):
It's interesting talking about the anal botox. I always assumed
that uh, using inno botox was cosmetic, right, that it
would like make the whole look right, But yeah, exactly
right that my wringled hole, yes, like yeah, but I'm
curious it's uh, I guess the way it's interacting with
(31:44):
the muscles is actually like the primary reason is to
help relaxes totally.
Speaker 7 (31:48):
I mean it's a treatment for anal fissures. It's a
treatment for pelvic floor issues. Too tight, I can't get
full relaxation. So yeah, it's covered by insurance, which is amazing.
People have access to this and it really works wonders.
I mean it brings people so much toy that you're
able to now pull them.
Speaker 6 (32:08):
And I say, think of like the rubber those big
rubber bands.
Speaker 7 (32:11):
Right when you get the big rubber band and you
try to open it, you're like, fuck, it's not happening.
But if every day you were to do a little bit,
that rubber band starts to stretch. The problem is is
that people that have fissures or their asses too tight,
they can't even get to the part where they're using
the toys correctly. So by giving botox, now they're like, oh,
(32:32):
I am relaxed. Oh, and now they start the positive
feedback loop and then they can actually dilate correctly, so
that now people are able to get to where they
need to be. And most people are like, all right,
am I going to fart and shit on the street.
The answer is, you'll have a little bit more gas. No,
you shouldn't shit.
Speaker 6 (32:49):
On the street.
Speaker 7 (32:50):
I usually say people like, you know, in the beginning,
it's a new asshole. So if you feel like you
have to go poop.
Speaker 2 (32:55):
Just do it.
Speaker 6 (32:55):
Just go poop it until yeah, just don't trust that.
Speaker 1 (32:59):
We did not first episode, we had a come dump,
come in and be like I think his best piece
of advice was never trust a far after you've been bred.
Speaker 7 (33:07):
And that's that's also what's known as refractory period, where
like some people after they get bottomed, they can just
become tight again.
Speaker 6 (33:14):
And many others cannot.
Speaker 7 (33:16):
Where it takes hours, sometimes twelve hours, twenty four hours,
it can be where you're right, you can definitely potentially get.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
When you're sitting on the subway in your show, I'll
leave that on the seat.
Speaker 6 (33:28):
Anal boat talks. You know, people think that you're gonna
need to do it for the rest of your life.
You don't.
Speaker 7 (33:34):
Most people do it two to three sessions. It lasts
about three to four months. I do it in the
office with you awake. You don't need There are deffinitent
people that put people to sleep for this. I don't
think it's necessary one bit. And it, you know, starts
to fully work in about five to seven days, and
it decreases the pressure enough that now you can start
(33:54):
to actually do what you need to do. And then
during that we're able to really see our right. Do
I need to work with the skin? How do I
toughen it? How do I create more you know, flexibility
in that space, and so we go over a lot
using the dilators, but also what's called the cone dilator.
What happens with the cone is it starts to stretch
the skin more, which is where a lot of people,
(34:17):
you know, the first thing we hit is the skin,
So the top is hitting the skin, and if the
skin doesn't have the force right, it'll split if it
can't take that pressure. And also if it opens way
too fast and it's not strong enough, what happens is
it tears. So the key is to really work that
and make sure that you're stretching the skin as well.
(34:37):
So there's you know, I say it's not complicated, but
there's there's a lot.
Speaker 1 (34:41):
There's a lot that goes into a It's not rocket sized,
but it definitely is like physics, it's all about pressure pressure.
Speaker 3 (34:51):
And for our listeners, you've actually used the botox for
your yeah?
Speaker 2 (34:55):
Have you not? Yeah? Yeah, it's hard to do.
Speaker 6 (34:59):
It's hard to do it yourself.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
I'm like, what does it even look like like shaving?
I'm really flexible, so I can make those things happen.
Speaker 1 (35:07):
Do you use it?
Speaker 3 (35:08):
Just like I just pulled the leg up and go yeah, okay,
we got to.
Speaker 6 (35:13):
Get your legs, your leg up all the way that
go on.
Speaker 2 (35:15):
It's amazing.
Speaker 6 (35:16):
That should be an episode in and of it.
Speaker 1 (35:19):
No, that's years of dance training. Okay, do not try
to lift your leg behind your head, please don't.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
I have and it is very painful.
Speaker 1 (35:28):
Yeah, I'm curious this is we don't often talk to
doctors whore very open about using some of the procedures
they do themselves.
Speaker 7 (35:33):
So yeah, yeah, I mean I think a lot of
it was from a fizzer perspective of paddow.
Speaker 6 (35:37):
And again tight ass totally type AM like total type A.
Speaker 7 (35:42):
And again, what's interesting when you see bottom starting to
navigate bottoming early meaning fifteen sixteen, seventeen eighteen, the muscles
are not fully developed that you're actually able to train
the muscles quite well.
Speaker 5 (35:56):
But a lot of.
Speaker 6 (35:57):
People like I came out later in life.
Speaker 7 (35:59):
I was in my third and you're already kind of
in your way, and you could see a lot of
those people have reticent issues as it relates to bottoming.
Speaker 6 (36:08):
But functionally there's limitations.
Speaker 7 (36:10):
So again, by doing anal BOATOX when it's necessary, and
then you can actually start dilating. I mean for me,
you know, I use a toy once or twice a
week in the shower. It doesn't even need to be sexual,
like like literally just put the toy and like ten
times in and out and that's it. And like what
you'll notice is that it just helps with shitting. And
(36:30):
then like even when you're dance and especially a lot
of dancers have pelvic floor issues because their core right
is now really changing the way the pelvis is functioning.
So toy work and dilating. So again I don't do
I don't need boattox now, thankfully.
Speaker 9 (36:48):
To get to the second Thursday, it's actually mondays, I
was like, damn.
Speaker 6 (37:00):
I work from home.
Speaker 2 (37:01):
On there we go.
Speaker 10 (37:05):
Yeah, the picture, So how big was it this moment?
Speaker 2 (37:19):
I have mine in the shower that just like lives
on the back of my shower wall.
Speaker 3 (37:22):
Yeah yeah, and it just like lives there and it
just is a little reminder, Oh you should do that thing, yes,
just like going to the gym.
Speaker 7 (37:28):
Totally and and it changes your world because again and
then like you know, again, I say to people like
sometimes you're arched over right, and then someone says.
Speaker 6 (37:36):
Oh, you're archiving. You kind of but a lot of
people don't know how to actually reset their back right.
Speaker 7 (37:41):
But again, the same thing anally, all day we're sitting
ninety nine percent where we're contracted right, and you don't
know how to actually concentrate and relax the whole right,
relax your pelvis. That's where toy work comes into play.
And we talk a lot about that specifically in the
book of like really learning that in that me to
get you into the sweetest spot of where you want
(38:02):
to go.
Speaker 3 (38:03):
So what are things that people are doing at home
that they should not be doing? I know on your
Instagram you've talked about whites.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 7 (38:10):
I keep getting yelled at for my comments of whites
because people love wipes. Yeah, wet wipes are really terrible.
They should be banned. I mean, you know, are you
using you a wet wipe user?
Speaker 9 (38:20):
You fucking are?
Speaker 2 (38:21):
I am a reformed Are you still using them? What
do you mean? No? I used to.
Speaker 1 (38:26):
I use them for years until I got a little
a bidet for my toilet And.
Speaker 2 (38:30):
Yeah, but I don't have a day everywhere I go,
I know.
Speaker 7 (38:32):
But the thing is is that, like, you know, our
skin is really good with like the good bacteria and
the bad bacteria. And it's not to say that I
want you to have like shit in your ass, but
like it needs a little bit of cajeeling, you know,
it needs that.
Speaker 6 (38:46):
The problem is is that the wet wipes.
Speaker 2 (38:49):
Eat a little redsid in there.
Speaker 6 (38:51):
So the issue is the wet wipes.
Speaker 7 (38:53):
I don't know is it the fabric, is it the moisture,
or is it the actual solution, but it changes microbiome.
I see a ton of anal warts and herpies from
wet wipes, and literally I'll look at the ass or
if they DM me the picture and I'll be like,
do you use wet wipes? And they're like yes. I'm
like stop that. That's the first thing. And it's crazy.
Speaker 8 (39:19):
You're about to discover so many things you have not
seen with the leg right the good. You're fine, but
maybe there is something wrong with me.
Speaker 6 (39:30):
But wet wipes is one that should be stopped.
Speaker 7 (39:33):
I think again, a lot of people do nair and
or are shaving, and I get it. I think the
problem is like all of those, what happens is the
hair follicle is still present. So I see a lot
of acne. I see a lot of ingrown hairs. And
then also if you have like coarse hair like you
and I do, especially what happens is when it starts
(39:54):
to grow back, you start getting so much friction, especially
from a sex perspective. So we talk a lot about
like laser hair removal and how to, and nowadays it
really gets the gamut of all different skin types, because
back in the day it was like only whites.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
It was like, let's it.
Speaker 7 (40:08):
No, Now we have the technology to really get people
to where they want to be. Even sometimes I tell
people to thin if they don't want to be so smooth,
because some people don't like all smooth and then.
Speaker 6 (40:19):
Crazy hair, right, which I get it.
Speaker 7 (40:21):
So now we're even doing some thinning approaches so that
you don't have as much irritation. You don't have to
use crazy wet wipes because shit gets stuck in your
ass hair that type of thing, right, And we're kind
of creating an environment that's less acne prone in other issues.
And then I think other stuff that people are doing incorrectly.
They're just not listening to their body, you know, and
(40:43):
they're just like, you know, if they're in pain, and
it's five out of ten and they're like, well, fuck it,
I'm just going to kind of plow through the bottoming
session and then it just starts leading to more and
more and more potential issues. Some people do oil based
lubes or they're using like coconut oil, and I get it.
Speaker 6 (41:00):
It's like sexy and fun and massaging.
Speaker 7 (41:02):
But the problem is it causes a lot of the
same issues that douching with water or douching with enemies does.
It actually changes the internal microbiome, and so we have
so if we and I go on the street, this
is the street segment, We're going to do this next time,
and I'll swap ten random people and be like, I
bet you I can tell you that you take it
up the ass. Because there's a specific bacteria that is
(41:25):
in us that is only from bottoming. It's a special
population of what's called provatella.
Speaker 6 (41:31):
But it's because it's.
Speaker 1 (41:35):
Called provotella, but my favorite.
Speaker 6 (41:42):
That's fucking awesome.
Speaker 7 (41:44):
But again, all of that is about how do we
use the right solutions right, How do we use something
that's not toxic, how do we use the appropriate looves,
how do you stay away from the home remedies?
Speaker 6 (41:55):
Again, if it's there and you need something great.
Speaker 7 (41:58):
We'll support it, but I think again it's kind of
making choices that are appropriate for you and your partners.
Speaker 1 (42:04):
All right, doctor Goldstein, I gotta say this has been
so much fun. It has been very hot and very informative.
Speaker 2 (42:08):
Where can people find you online?
Speaker 6 (42:10):
For me, it's a d R.
Speaker 7 (42:11):
Evan Goldstein, Doctor goldstand and all the channels, the surgical practices,
Bespoke Surgical. The Future Method is the Future Method on
Instagram and future method dot com, and then the book,
but Seriously is everywhere launching.
Speaker 6 (42:26):
It's amazing. We're super excited.
Speaker 7 (42:28):
And then there's a website dedicated to that as well,
so check it out.
Speaker 2 (42:32):
Amazing, amazing, Thank you absolutely, thank you for being here.
Speaker 1 (42:35):
And please try not to flood doctor Goldsteine with your buffets.
Speaker 2 (42:39):
But do you know they might get because I gotta
get mine in first.
Speaker 1 (42:41):
Yeah absolutely, I'm coming in second, next full moon just through.
Speaker 2 (42:46):
A group chat. Yeah like that. Yeah, I got it.
Speaker 1 (42:49):
As doctor Goldstein mentioned, but Seriously is available to order now.
Speaker 3 (42:52):
More Sniffy's cruising Confessions After the break, I jumped my name.
I want to thank our guests today, Dick, doctor Joshua
Gonzalez and but doctor Evan Goldstein. They had been so informative,
(43:14):
really demystifying a lot of what we know about our
dicks and our holes totally.
Speaker 1 (43:18):
I mean, I have learned so much this episode, maybe
the most out of any other. And I also think
that both of these interviews had made me a little
less afraid to try new things yes, or to think
about my body in different ways.
Speaker 2 (43:33):
Well, thank you again for joining us.
Speaker 1 (43:34):
We hope that you have walked away with a ton
of knowledge and felt as emboldened to take care of
your front and back as we have.
Speaker 2 (43:43):
Thanks again for watching.
Speaker 1 (43:44):
Snippy's Cruising Confessions is a production from Outspoken podcast Network
from iHeart Podcasts.
Speaker 2 (43:49):
It's directed by Adam.
Speaker 1 (43:50):
Barron, produced by Stevie Williams and Cameron's Semino, and executive
produced by Eli Martinson. Cruising Confessions is presented by Snippy's,
the ultimate map based cruising cloud. We're forgave by and
curious people ready to cruz. Check out them out at
Sniffy's dot com and follow Snippy's on socials at Sniffy's app.
Speaker 6 (44:08):
Put Joe put Put Joe put Joe puts
Speaker 5 (44:16):
H
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