June 19, 2025 • 34 mins
Hey Daddy! In this week’s episode, Chris and Gabe interview Judson Morrow, the co-host of the Dads And Daddies podcast, about what it means to be a daddy, how PrEP played a role in igniting the daddy craze, and how Judson navigates his own daddy/son relationships. He’ll also offer expert tips on cruising, dating, and hooking up that both daddies and sons can use. Then, one of our listeners shares a jaw-dropping cruising confession about a daddy encounter in a secluded park bathroom.
Follow Sniffies' Cruising Confessions: cruisingconfessions.com
Try Sniffies: sniffies.com
Follow Sniffies on Social:
Instagram: instagram.com/sniffiesapp
TikTik: tiktok.com/@sniffiesapp
Follow the hosts:
Gabe Gonzalez: instagram.com/gaybonez
Chris Patterson-Rosso: instagram.com/cprgivesyoulife
Guests featured in this episode:
Judson Morrow: https://www.instagram.com/dadsanddaddiespod/
Music:
Chris Conde: chrisconde.com/
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, viewers, Sniffy's Cruising Confessions is an explicit podcast about
queer sex. Filter dirty words and unfiltered descriptions of sexual activities.
If hearing about orgies, anonymous sex, kink, fetish, and more
offends your sensibilities, you might want to skip this Viewer
discretion is advised. It's definitely not for kids.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Put Jo, pussy up, put your put Jo, pussy up,
put Jo, pussy up, put put Jo busy. Welcome to
Sniffy's Cruising Confessions. I'm gabeln Saalez.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
And I'm Christottas and Rosso. Each week we explore the
sublime world of queer sex, cruising, and relationships.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
We talked to queer folks of all kinds.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
We'll ask some questions, swap sex stories, share intimate revelations,
and provide practical advice that you can use at home.
Speaker 4 (00:44):
Jo put joust job pot put job.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
Today we're talking about a word that's been around for centuries,
is used by toddlers, twinks, and even sex workers.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
It can be the source of issues or some extra
zeros in your bank account.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Today we're talking about Daddy's Gabe.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Do you remember the first time you hooked up with
the Daddy.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
The first time I did hook up with the Daddy,
it was via craigslist, okay, And I was back home
from summer break and I decided to hook up with
this guy and went over to his house. And you
know how usually when you meet an older queer man,
they want to teach you about history.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
They're like, yes, there's always at.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
Peter's in Fire Island in the seventies, right, Like that's
so fully expecting that, fully expecting that, ready for that
love that get to his house. This man is like
the official historian for the Kennedy family, Like has portraits
of dead members of the Kennedy family all over his home.
On the way to his bedroom, walked me down a
hallway with photos of the Kennedy stopped at each one,
(01:44):
and I was like, this is Robert Kennedy, this is
this is John F.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
Kennedy. And I was like, cool, are they joining us?
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Was happening here? It was really unsettling. A huge horse
cock stuck on it a little bit. Didn't really know
what I was getting into. I was like eighteen, and
I was like, thank you so much for the tour
of the Kennedy Museum. I can't fit your dick in
my mouth, and I'm not really looking to get fuck tonight.
So maybe let's grab some water and chat. Chris, how
about you? What's your what's your daddy story?
Speaker 2 (02:13):
I cannot top that.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
I have always had an affinity for older men and
that has not stopped as I've gotten older.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
Yeah, I love a daddy. They're sure of themselves, they're
aware and like that to me is like so sexy.
I hook up with a lot of daddies. You're the
daddy whisperer.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
One could say, you know, we should be interviewing you
for this episode, our guests.
Speaker 3 (02:40):
Yeah, all right, Well, today's episode is all about daddies.
Back in the day, older men were often called trolls
by younger gay men. Things have shifted in recent years, right,
Daddies are having a moment. So in today's episode, we're
going to dive into the rise of the daddy and
hopefully teach you how to cruise for them in the wild.
We've en listened the help of renowned daddy Judson Morrow,
who co hosts one of our favorite podcast, Dads and
(03:02):
Daddy's with Brian Rubin Sauers. Together, Brian a literal dad
of two and just and chat about their life as
hot father figures, sharing personal stories from parenthood, daddy hood, love, marriage, addiction, recovery,
and so much more.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
Please welcome to Stuffy's Cruising Confessions. Judson Morrow, How you doing?
Speaker 2 (03:17):
Hey, guys, what a pleasure to be on this side
of the mic than you ever having are so, Judson,
I'm very excited to have you here.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Before we dive deep into daddydom, I was hoping you
could tell me a little bit about the Dads and
Daddy's podcast.
Speaker 5 (03:29):
The Dad's and Daddy's Podcast is the product of a
neighborhood friendship. I met Brian Rubin Sauers at a Hanaka
party a couple of years ago, and we kept running
into each other, and one evening this man shows up
with a seventeen slide power point about why I should
be his podcast co host. Brian is a literal dad.
(03:52):
He has two children. He is in an open gay marriage.
I am also in an open gay marriage, although I
don't have children.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
So he's the dad.
Speaker 5 (04:01):
I'm the sexual and spiritual daddy, and we talk about
everything that it means to be an adult gay man
in the modern world. Cruising Breakups, hookups, sex party etiquette,
and then we have tons of guests coming on healers,
sex workers, authors, scientists. So I have to ask, how
would you define a daddy. I'm going to make it oppositional.
(04:24):
What a daddy is not. A dom top with a
salt and pepper beard with a one point seven to
one shoulder to waist ratio does not a daddy make
There is overlap, absolutely, but the piece that's missing is
that daddy is the service role that makes it age agnostic,
(04:44):
position agnostic, fem mask agnostic, esthetic agnostic, and it's really
just the person who provides coaching, guidance, mentorship and a
space to learn. Not everyone knows what they want, and
even when they find that out, they don't know how
to ask for that, so that daddy creates that space
(05:05):
for their sons.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
I love this definition.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
For so long I've been operating on like the Supreme
Court porn definition of daddydom.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
I've been like, I know a daddy when I see it, right.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
But thinking of it again as age agnostic and gender
agnostic is something that makes it so much more expansive
and so much more fun. Right, think of it as
a service role rather than a literal father figure, and
I get right. For some people, that's sort of the
turn on, this sort of classic father figure in that
service role.
Speaker 5 (05:30):
I'm a daddy son switch yeah, in the same way
that I think verse guys are great tops because they
know what it feels like to bottom. I learned so
much by being a good son to other daddies. And
I have a daddy who is twenty three years old.
He is twenty years younger than me, and he just
has it. He is caring, he's compassionate, he creates space.
(05:52):
It's incredible.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
When did this interest in becoming a daddy or sort
of learning more about daddy's begin.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
I have always been into older men.
Speaker 5 (06:02):
When I was eighteen, I had a boyfriend who was
thirty six years old, and yes, the sex was incredible,
but also given how I grew up, he provided a
lot of like love, comfort and space for me to
grow that I wasn't getting in my home life right.
So for me, it's this sort of passing of the
torch that, to be quite honest, the reason that I
(06:23):
think about it so much is that it was actually
sort of thrust upon me as I aged. Once people
started to call me daddy without provocation. I just kind
of owned it, and that's when I moved into a
space where I was like, wait a minute, I've been
doing this the whole time. It's the ownership piece that's
been missing. So I would say I really stepped into
(06:44):
it probably in my late thirties, where I was also
in that sort of sexual icon purgatory where you're like,
am I an uncle?
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Am I an hodd? Or am I a daddy? I
don't really know. So in the last like five years, it.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
Seems like the poles are like daddy and twi, and
then what comes in between is like a mishmash or
kind of salad.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
And I'm curious about the first time you were called daddy.
Speaker 5 (07:06):
The first daddy I ever got, I was on the
L train and this Bushwick twink right across from me goes, okay, Daddy.
Speaker 1 (07:17):
That was the moment I was like, Okay, I've arrived.
Did that lead to anything or was it just kind
of an epiphany for you? Oh?
Speaker 2 (07:24):
We fought, yeah, yeah, yeah, yes.
Speaker 3 (07:26):
I don't know if someone called me daddy. I mean,
they do call me daddy, and I'm always like, I
don't know if I qualify, mainly because you talked about coaching.
Speaker 2 (07:37):
It does require patients, Chris, and that is a thing
I do not possess.
Speaker 3 (07:42):
And so when someone calls me daddy, it's oh no, no,
please don't put that on me, because I don't want
to take on that role.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
I think that's exactly it. That's a choice.
Speaker 5 (07:49):
The marker for daddyness is just claiming it. All you
have to do is say I'm daddy.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
It doesn't have to be.
Speaker 5 (07:56):
Sexual in nature necessarily either, Like you could be the
resume daddy, like I've had jobs. Let me help prove
your Resumehtonic.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
Daddies in the traditional set not everyone's fucking their father
if we're thinking about it in that way.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
I have definitely played daddy to a lot of younger
artists and people who are like breaking into the industry.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
So you are daddy, yes, Boomer.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
But I was gonna say, now that you mentioned it,
I think Chris might be my like backstage daddy. I
am famous for putting things down and not remembering where
they are, and Chris will just see me looking around
and be like, babe, are you looking for this?
Speaker 2 (08:31):
And we'll pick up the exact thing I'm looking for. Yeah,
So you you might be my dressing room daddy. Great, okay, great, yes,
backstage daddy. I love daddies. See, you just have to
own it, so Jenson.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
So we've been talking about it. Feels like daddies are
are very much in the zeitgeist right now. Daddies are
having a moment and identifying as a daddy can often
make you more desirable to some younger gay men. But
what was a common view of older men or daddies
before now, right from the nineties and earlier. Do you
think there's been kind of a culture shift between now
and I think the shift has a lot to do.
Speaker 5 (09:02):
With the fact that in the eighties and nineties, older
men were seen as the product unfortunately of HIV eight's.
There was a much bigger question mark over their heads
as to whether engaging with them was going to make
you quote unquote and this is the terminology of the time,
(09:22):
not today sick. Right with the advent of prep and
the ability to have what I will call safe, condomless sex.
But I think that stigma has largely gone away, which
makes space for the sort of caretaking and compassion that
younger men might seek from an older daddy.
Speaker 3 (09:41):
Also, I think that there is more daddies around today, right, Like,
there's an entire generation of folks that just don't exist
because of the AIDS pandemic. And I think now they're
just more daddies around, which is lovely, right, And there
will be.
Speaker 5 (09:55):
More daddies because there's just by numbers, there's more of
us who have come out and are living comfortably. By numbers,
there are more people who are living healthy, long lives.
So the daddy generation, if we do want to age
band it is going to be humongous. There is a
lot of opportunity for sons out there if they're looking
for an older man, Like we're here now.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
I see why jd Vance wants to get the birth
rate up. We need more twinks to catch up to
the number of daddies. It all makes sense.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
We're going to be fine. We're going to be fine.
Speaker 1 (10:26):
No, but that's a really good point, right, Like, the
combined stigma of the hva's epidemic, along with the fact
that you're getting generations of folks who are comfortable being
out earlier, You're right, are kind of setting it up
for peak daddy.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
We might be reaching the apex soon.
Speaker 5 (10:38):
There's a third part two and that is because younger
people are coming out sooner and more comfortably. They actually
have each other to experiment with sexually, so much a gift.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
So what a gift?
Speaker 5 (10:52):
Like when we were coming up in the eighties and nineties, like,
we didn't have other teens to have a sexual awakening
with the same way our heterosy actual at least at
that time counterparts were able to write. It sometimes felt
like the only option was an older man because that's
who was out there. So I think a lot of
people now will probably ultimately end up experimenting with their
(11:14):
age group and then graduate, if you will, to daddy
by choice as opposed to by force.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
Daddy by default.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Yeah, we've heard about the first time you were called daddy,
but I want to know when you met your husband Bruce.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
Shout out to Bruce.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
Hello, hy Bruce, who buy all accounts is a very
sexy daddy as well.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
How did you all meet? What's that story?
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Like?
Speaker 5 (11:35):
I'm going to date the relationship by sharing that we
met on manhunt dot net, the.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
Blue Screen Manhunt Dude's nude Adam for Adam.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
That was my college era.
Speaker 1 (11:46):
That's when I started meeting daddy's because I couldn't find
anyone my age.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
Let's not get it twisted.
Speaker 5 (11:51):
I love Sniffy's, but there is a piece of my
heart that breaks when I talk to someone who's twenty
two and will never know the joys of buying extra credits.
Oh my god, people to open an email and the
content of the email is just okay.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
The indignity of having to pay to send a stranger
your nudes like wild.
Speaker 5 (12:15):
So we met on manhunt dot net. I was sprung
on this man from jump. He answered the door in
crocs sweatpants when sweatpants were not cute. I'm talking like Haines,
scrunchy at the bottom and a ripped T shirt. And
I thought to myself, you thought I was going to
be ugly.
Speaker 2 (12:37):
I showed him who.
Speaker 5 (12:40):
He was, Like, I thought it was just going to
be a fling, Like I liked you, but you were
like twenty seven and pretty messy. I was wildly alcoholic
at the time, So did I see him as a daddy.
There was definitely a part of his life that, at
least as I perceived it, because he lived in Soho
(13:00):
when I first met him, that just perceived stability. Well, yeah,
I love that I'm like he was stable, Yeah, and
at twenty seven, you're kind of looking for that.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
At least I was, right, I was looking for that
stability because I was in an age GOP relationship when
I was in my twenties and then got married at
twenty six, and like there was like the stability that
was like so attractive to me. I was like, yeah,
I give me more of that because my life is
a fucking mess right now.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
That's something I'm so curious about too, right because it
seems like Bruce meets you and he's like, all right,
you were kind of a mess. You were much younger,
which to me implies messy. Do you often see those
reservations work the other way around, where like a younger
person is entering relationship and they're like, oh, you're older,
you want to have kids, and like get a house.
I'm in my twenties, I gotta sew my wild oats.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
Yes.
Speaker 5 (13:51):
Absolutely, I think for younger people there is a huge
opportunity cost. It's like, ooh, you're twenty years older than me,
Like you've had all the opportunity and like maybe know
exactly what you want and I don't necessarily want to
like pigeonhole my desires or the outcome of my life
toward your idea of success. I think the flip side
(14:13):
of seeing younger people as a little messy is that
the older gentleman in this scenario can be a little
more set in his ways, especially if he's been independent
for a long time, and it gets a little harder
as the older person to incorporate someone new, especially someone
young who's still on the path of self discovery.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
No.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
Absolutely, I dated a younger person last year and I
really was like struggling.
Speaker 2 (14:40):
I was like, this is wild.
Speaker 3 (14:42):
Is this what people have been doing with me for
all these years? Like they just lived a completely different
life than I did. I just was like, you are
a wild individual, and I sn't know how you live
your life.
Speaker 5 (14:53):
I think sometimes you can get into the daddy sun
dynamic and your son is a little too stubborn.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
It's like, oh, this actually is not a match.
Speaker 5 (15:03):
And it's not because I'm trying to necessarily like dominate
or control, but like the willingness to be instructed, cared for,
mentored is critical to this back and forth.
Speaker 2 (15:15):
And if you're gonna do what you're just gonna do,
let me know that and we can move into that. No, right,
we can.
Speaker 5 (15:22):
Easily switch and move into that, but we're we're cutting
off access to the daddy dum.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
So we have talked a little bit.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
About some of the challenges, but I would like to
talk about the fun parts of having sex. What do
you think is hot about sex with daddy and what
is it that makes them appealing to you specifically as well?
Speaker 5 (15:39):
They just know what they're doing, and that feels so
good because I may I may not even know that
I'm into something until I am introduced to it by
like a really, really proficient practitioner, and then you're.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
Just like, okay, like this is absolutely a thing now.
Speaker 5 (15:59):
So that is I think the broad appeal for me specifically,
it's different now than it was before when I was
hooking up with daddies. Previously it was more of the
sun roll and to be cared for. And now when
I hook up with daddi's it's really a learning opportunity
for me. Like I love to hear daddy talk tracks,
(16:20):
I love to see how they move their body, I
love how they manage the dom sub relationship. It's so
much for me to become a better daddy to hook
up with other daddies.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
There's just so much for me to learn. What's something
that you've learned from your partner?
Speaker 2 (16:36):
Yeah, specifically sexually?
Speaker 1 (16:39):
Oh, specifically sexually, something you Bruce introduced you to, or
something that you were like early on in dating, you
were like.
Speaker 5 (16:44):
Oh, when Bruce and I met, I because I was
smaller of stature and younger at the time, saw myself
as a bottom. I think this is part of the
journey for a lot of gay men, right, Yeah. And
then when I'm at him, he is also a bottom,
I would say ninety seven percent of the time, and
(17:04):
it's like, well, what are we going to do?
Speaker 2 (17:05):
Just like rub our butts together, It's like the other
end of the scissors.
Speaker 5 (17:11):
Yeah, right, So I learned two things from him. I
learned how to be a better top because I got
so much practice with him. And I learned how to
be a better bottom because he had so much more
practice out of than me anything, right, like different positions,
better ways to clean out. I've learned so much just
(17:32):
about the basics. And I think that's a big reason
that we're open too, because I still like to bottom,
and again, we're not just going to rub our butts together.
He wants me to experience the joy that he experiences
as a bottom, and that requires other people outside of
the relationship.
Speaker 2 (17:50):
Yeah, there really is no greater experience than bottoming. I
can't think of one.
Speaker 1 (17:57):
I'm sorry, I thought that was going to keep going,
and you're just like, no, no, no, that's so that's
actually the best experience you can have in life is bottoming.
Speaker 4 (18:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:05):
I mean mazo realistics out there, speaking of of assumptions
and sort of archetypes that might be incorrect that we've
had thrust upon us. I think with a lot of
the age gap discourse that we see online, especially today,
there's this assumption that anyone older is automatically predatory if
they're hooking up with younger people, which is obviously very
(18:27):
broad generalization. That can happen, it doesn't always happen. So
what are some healthy ways you see people navigating age
gaps and some of the differences.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
That might come up from that in relationships.
Speaker 5 (18:37):
I think you have to enter age gap relationships in
good faith. Let's not get it twisted. When I had
the Internet and access to a car, I absolutely lied
about my age right As a safety I use what
I call at math if they are twenty one or younger,
I subtract five, and if they're fifty five or older,
I add five. Right, So that's actually super we're helpful.
(19:00):
Oh you're twenty one, you're sixteen? Oh god, wow, You're
not going to.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
Always be able to like check the ID.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
Right.
Speaker 5 (19:09):
But I do think you have to know, especially if
you are the older person, which I am in this situation,
that you are the one in charge. If you don't
want that thrust upon you, you're not ready to have
this kind of relationship with anybody, right. I remember I
was in high school and I was pursuing these older men,
(19:30):
and then I became the age of these older men
and lived on the same block as a high school
and as I would walk by on the way to
the train, I thought.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Oh my god, like these are babies. Like what were
these men seeing in me? Right?
Speaker 5 (19:44):
So I think that's where the sort of problematic discourse
comes from. You, as the older person, although daddy can
be a diagnostic, do have to take the responsibility of
being the adult.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
In the room.
Speaker 3 (19:55):
All Right, when we come back, we're gonna hear justin
SIPs for cruising for both daddies and sons.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
Sniffy's Cruising Confessions after the break. Welcome back to Sniffy's
Cruising Confessions. That was good boys, Say yes sir by
Chris Kannick.
Speaker 3 (20:11):
Now we've heard about how Judson landed a very sexy
daddy as his sould me. But now we're going to
hear his expert advice on how to cruise for Daddy's. So, Judson,
what are the first steps for our listeners who are
interested in cruising for Daddy's.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
Well, for anybody cruising anybody.
Speaker 5 (20:25):
Before we get to the specifics, I always like to
treat it as a zero sum game. You didn't know
the person before you said hello, you didn't know the
person before you sent them a message on Sniffy's and
if they don't respond and the way that you want,
you just get to go back to your life as normal.
I think that is a great mentality across the board
(20:46):
for Daddy's looking for sons. One trap I think is
coming off a little too strong. Your son may not
know that that's exactly what he wants and needs. I
think tative it's not the right word, but not as
aggressive as you might be in the context of something
(21:07):
like a dad's and lads party where you know, that's
exactly what they're looking for. I think for sons specifically
looking for daddies. Even though we're the one driving the car,
where the mentor the teacher, the coach, we are also
gay men and love to be wooed, and it's just
as easy as just approaching us with a hello. Like
(21:29):
I mentioned earlier, the guy in the oltrain, all he
said was okay, daddy, and that was enough to engage.
Speaker 2 (21:35):
Yeah. What are your thoughts in eagerness? Oh, aka thirst?
Speaker 3 (21:41):
I think there's a slight difference between those two things,
but yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
It's a very fine line. It's a very very fine
line between eagerness and thirsty.
Speaker 5 (21:49):
Yeah, and you don't see it until it's been crossed, right,
Like there's that exact moment where you're like too much. Right,
My thoughts on eagerness are or that if it is
in earnest and if it is following the sort of
role play that you have created, then it's a go.
(22:09):
I'm communicating with a boy, a son on Sniffy's right now,
and his eagerness comes across as so sincere. The problem
is when an eagerness online just sort of falls off
when you try to make the actual plan right. And
that is not daddy sun specific, that is life on
the apps anymore. But I feel like eagerness is welcome
(22:32):
as long as you can back it.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
Up with your booty.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
Are there scenarios where like daddies might be diving in
a bit too eagerly, or maybe the supportive or daddy
figure is like the more eager one and not quite ready.
Speaker 5 (22:44):
Although I have said that to be a daddy is
just to claim that you are a daddy, please know
that if you are new to the experience, it might
land with certain sons as an experience or rushed like,
you'll have room to grow and learn. I think the
most important thing is to recognize is that it's something
(23:05):
that you want for yourself. And I think, like in
so many things, you'll only find out by failing fast,
that you need to You need to study up, spend
time with other daddies.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
Daddy support, groudad collective.
Speaker 3 (23:20):
Yes, what if you're interested in purely sex? How do
you approach a dad's son relationship in that way?
Speaker 5 (23:26):
People who listen to the Dad's and Daddy's Pod have
heard me say this ad nauseum, open, honest, direct, open
honest direct, open honest direct. If you are exclusively looking
for a daddy sun dynamic in a sex only relationship,
have that in your profile.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
Let people know quickly.
Speaker 5 (23:45):
It's just that easy, especially in the modern world where
people are moving quickly, they have a lot of other
things to do.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
I think directness is a kindness.
Speaker 5 (23:55):
You just have to advertise and be okay if someone
wants more than that, and be okay if someone's not
into that.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
We've talked a little bit about the difference and experiences
growing up with HIV AIDS depending on your age, But
what do you think is good advice for navigating safer sex,
whatever that means between an older and a younger partner.
Speaker 5 (24:14):
I think, as a product of when I grew up,
I understand exactly what it feels like to be so
scared of sex and then have something like prep introduced
into my life and to finally, finally, finally get to
have the sex of the nineteen seventies that I idealized, right,
like the post stone wall, pre aids, back of a
(24:36):
truck sex right. And I think if you are the
older person in the relationship, you have to understand that
not everyone is growing up in that same environment or
feels that same kind of relief. So you have to
give your younger partner a lot of grace on their
journey with what they define as a safe sexual practice.
And if you are the younger partner, it is absolutely
(24:58):
up to you to decide what you are more or
most comfortable with. It's really important to be having these
conversations with your doctor or primary care physician to understand
exactly what options are available for you. I'll share with
you something that I didn't get until my mid thirties,
and that was I had a therapist tell me you
never have to have sex with anyone that you don't
(25:19):
want to, and that extends to save sex practices.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
All right, j justsin. We've had so much fun today.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
I feel like I'm walking away with a much more
expansive idea of what daddy daddy nis daddy dom is
in my head.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
So thank you for that.
Speaker 1 (25:32):
But before we let you go, I would love a
cruising confession of your own today about having sex with
the daddy or having sex while you were the daddy.
Speaker 2 (25:41):
Oh, I'm going to give you both. Yes, We've got time.
Speaker 5 (25:44):
This summer I graduated from high school. I was eighteen
years old, and I cannot even remember how I met
this guy, but he was tall and broad shouldered and
mustached and just beautiful. And he and his partner invited
me into their home for the summer to be their
what houseboy, and I would just do all the things
(26:08):
like I would cook, I would clean, I painted their
fucking garage, and then they would fuck the shit out
of me.
Speaker 2 (26:14):
It was so so amazing.
Speaker 5 (26:17):
Wow, I was eighteen years old, and it just like
expanded my entire understanding of all of it.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
Where are they now? My hottest experience as a daddy.
Speaker 5 (26:29):
I met this guy in the neighborhood on Sniffy's and
he is so good at what he does. He has
made me enjoy something that I don't gravitate toward at all,
and that is specifically getting my dick sucked. Don't love it,
have never been into it. Controversial opinion. I would much
prefer handy because of the grip. Anyway, I have never
(26:52):
even seen this guy naked, which makes it so hot.
He always leaves the door unlocked and is on his
knees in his lip room in a T shirt and shorts,
and he is the best cocksucker I have ever met
in my entire life, and he is I would say,
the best son I've ever had because he is so responsive,
(27:12):
he's so communicative. Sometimes he likes it rough, sometimes he
wants me to be mean. He is such a good boy.
He makes me so proud, and I have never experienced
in my entire life someone that just gets so much
joy out of sucking a dick. And that is why
I love to be of service to him. When you
(27:34):
have a relationship like that, because he's probably my most
hooked up with person ever beyond my husband, you develop
even more of a relationship. Like we definitely drop into
the roles the minute I walk in the door. And
after we're done, he gets me a seltzer out of
the fridge because he knows I'm sober, and we talk
about book, movie and show recommendations.
Speaker 2 (27:55):
And then we go on with our day. Oh that's
so fun.
Speaker 5 (27:58):
Yeah, I've never hung out other wise. This entire relationship
exists in his living room once a month.
Speaker 2 (28:05):
Amazing.
Speaker 3 (28:06):
All right, when we come back, we're going to hear
an actual cruising confession from one of our listeners. Stay tuned, Yes,
all right, this season, we're doing things a little bit differently,
and we wanted to bring our Sniffy's Cruising Confessions audience
into the conversation. So at the end of every episode
this season, we're going to listen to an actual cruising
confession from one of you.
Speaker 2 (28:24):
Yes, that's right.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
For better or worse, Sniffy set up a call in
hotline where users can leave voicemails about their hottest, weirdest,
or most outrageous true cruising stories, and we're going to
listen to them live for context. Neither of us have
courage this story before. No, I am thrilled, horrified, really excited.
So let's see what we got.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
The park was hot.
Speaker 4 (28:51):
One time I went to the park to the bathroom, okay,
and I saw me in there and he was just
my dick the whole time. I was like, why does
he look so familiar? Whenever we stopped and went out
in separate ways. He has my name and I didn't
tell my name, and I heard his name and then
(29:12):
I was like, oh my god. I told my friends
and was asking me if they could verify who my
friend's dad was because they just sucked my drink in
the bathroom.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (29:25):
Okay, speaking of literal fathers, speaking of literal fathers.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
Yeah, literal fathers.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
Okay, Wow, should we take this in chronological order? So yeah,
I yeah, so many feelings, so many beats to that
story that I mean, I'm really into into it. First
of all, Yeah, you were using a public bathroom in
a park. We know you don't live in New York
because those aren't here. Okay, so good on you for
living in a place where your public parks are well
funded and kept up by the city government. All right, right,
(29:56):
starts off as a very standard cruising story. Yeah, room,
someone follows you in, You're like, okay, this could be dangerous,
but could be hot. And then they get into the bathroom. Yeah, okay,
they do the deed. They do the deed, And I
like that we don't spend that much time talking about
the sucking itself. No, because that's not the point of
the story, right, that's not the climax, Baby, that's not
the climax you thought it was.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
This is wild, Yeah, No, it's this idea of like, God,
you look familiar, right, how.
Speaker 1 (30:22):
Do I know you? And then I love that the
familiarity was not something that this person addressed during the hookup. Yes,
they were like We're gonna keep this to dick sucking
in the bathroom only. Yeah, and then I'm gonna call
up one of my girls and be like, is this
your dad?
Speaker 2 (30:33):
Can you please confirm? Is this your dad? Please confirm?
I want an update? Did they hook up again?
Speaker 1 (30:41):
I know?
Speaker 2 (30:41):
Can we get? I would? I would love? And so did?
Was this the thing? Did you? Was it a regular thing?
Speaker 1 (30:48):
Like?
Speaker 2 (30:49):
Because why not?
Speaker 1 (30:50):
I'm gonna be honest, I have never ever ever run
into a friend's parent on any dating app, at any party.
What are these magical towns where where every hot closeted
dad is just like waiting on.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
A park bench. Just suck your daw. I good thing.
Speaker 1 (31:06):
You and your friends don't go cruising together, right, because
you would have maybe they might have had a very different.
Speaker 2 (31:10):
Experience in that baun. Yeah, yeah, that would have been
awkward though. Yeah. Well, we were wishing you and.
Speaker 1 (31:19):
From under the math room you just see the mouth
through the You're like, dad, is that you you recognize? This?
Speaker 2 (31:25):
Neger is the Lofers. It's familiar, the crocs, the not thees.
Speaker 3 (31:32):
Y'all.
Speaker 1 (31:33):
If you see Sperry's tapping at you from a restall,
that's a Republican senator.
Speaker 2 (31:37):
Okay, get out, get out, not the Sperries, damn.
Speaker 1 (31:43):
If you could call back, please let us know if
you hooked up again and what footwear he had on.
Those are two crucial things, Chris and I would love
to know. Thank you for that amazing confession. That was
really really great. If you are listening and you'd like
to hear your own cruising confessions on an upcoming episode
of this podcast, you can call our Cruising Confessions hotline
at three O two two one nine three eight nine eight,
(32:05):
and again it is three zero two two one nine
three eight nine eight. I would love to hear your
bat shit sexts. I'm very excited. Yeah, great way to
cap off. This episode was spectacular. Absolutely, I had so
much fun with Judson. I feel like I came in
with a very static idea of what a daddy was
for me. I always thought it was like an archetype,
you know, like like muscle Queen or Otter or Twink.
(32:28):
And understanding that for a lot of folks, daddy is
sort of a role and maybe a subdom dynamic.
Speaker 3 (32:33):
That that was exactly it, right, Like I understood more
about how expansive the term daddy could be right, and
I was able to see myself in that role, just
not in the way that I had thought of it previously.
I don't really just you know, describe myself as a man,
but I could definitely be a daddy.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
We got non binary daddies, we got cis women as daddies.
It's we got all sorts of daddies. And I think
this is also going to help me be more clear
maybe moving forward, because I'm very into daddy so I think,
you know, being more clear about what I want and
again our listeners, being clear about what you want with
any scenario, whether there's a power dynamic that is different
because of age, economic background, whatever it is, Right, this
(33:14):
was a great reminder to be more intentional my communications
and with my language. Yeah, I do want to thank
our guest today, Justsen Morrow from the Dads and Daddies podcast.
You can listen to the podcast at Dadsanddaddies dot com
spelled exactly the way you think it is, and you
can also follow them at Dads and Daddies on both
Instagram and TikTok. To learn even more about cruising, four Dads,
(33:35):
Sniffy's cruising Confessions is directed by Adam Barron, produced by
Amanda Kuper and cameraon Femino, and executive produced by Eli Martin.
Speaker 3 (33:42):
Cruising Confessions is presented by Snippy's, the ultimate map based
cruising platform, pre k by in Curious Peetol Ready to
Cruise check out the map at snippies dot com and
fall Snichey's at snippys app.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
Cruisers are a community. Do your part in keeping us safe.
Learn more about protecting your sexual help at Healthy Sexuals
dot com.
Speaker 2 (34:00):
Pot job, pot poat job, pot pot job post ya
Hey, viewers, Sniffy's Cruising Confessions is an explicit podcast about
queer sex. Filter dirty words and unfiltered descriptions of sexual activities.
If hearing about orgies, anonymous sex, kink, fetish, and more
offends your sensibilities, you might want to skip this Viewer
discretion is advised. It's definitely not for kids.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Put Jo, pussy up, put your put Jo, pussy up,
put Jo, pussy up, put put Jo busy. Welcome to
Sniffy's Cruising Confessions. I'm gabeln Saalez.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
And I'm Christottas and Rosso. Each week we explore the
sublime world of queer sex, cruising, and relationships.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
We talked to queer folks of all kinds.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
We'll ask some questions, swap sex stories, share intimate revelations,
and provide practical advice that you can use at home.
Speaker 4 (00:44):
Jo put joust job pot put job.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
Today we're talking about a word that's been around for centuries,
is used by toddlers, twinks, and even sex workers.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
It can be the source of issues or some extra
zeros in your bank account.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Today we're talking about Daddy's Gabe.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Do you remember the first time you hooked up with
the Daddy.
Speaker 1 (01:06):
The first time I did hook up with the Daddy,
it was via craigslist, okay, And I was back home
from summer break and I decided to hook up with
this guy and went over to his house. And you
know how usually when you meet an older queer man,
they want to teach you about history.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
They're like, yes, there's always at.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
Peter's in Fire Island in the seventies, right, Like that's
so fully expecting that, fully expecting that, ready for that
love that get to his house. This man is like
the official historian for the Kennedy family, Like has portraits
of dead members of the Kennedy family all over his home.
On the way to his bedroom, walked me down a
hallway with photos of the Kennedy stopped at each one,
(01:44):
and I was like, this is Robert Kennedy, this is
this is John F.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
Kennedy. And I was like, cool, are they joining us?
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Was happening here? It was really unsettling. A huge horse
cock stuck on it a little bit. Didn't really know
what I was getting into. I was like eighteen, and
I was like, thank you so much for the tour
of the Kennedy Museum. I can't fit your dick in
my mouth, and I'm not really looking to get fuck tonight.
So maybe let's grab some water and chat. Chris, how
about you? What's your what's your daddy story?
Speaker 2 (02:13):
I cannot top that.
Speaker 3 (02:20):
I have always had an affinity for older men and
that has not stopped as I've gotten older.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
Yeah, I love a daddy. They're sure of themselves, they're
aware and like that to me is like so sexy.
I hook up with a lot of daddies. You're the
daddy whisperer.
Speaker 1 (02:34):
One could say, you know, we should be interviewing you
for this episode, our guests.
Speaker 3 (02:40):
Yeah, all right, Well, today's episode is all about daddies.
Back in the day, older men were often called trolls
by younger gay men. Things have shifted in recent years, right,
Daddies are having a moment. So in today's episode, we're
going to dive into the rise of the daddy and
hopefully teach you how to cruise for them in the wild.
We've en listened the help of renowned daddy Judson Morrow,
who co hosts one of our favorite podcast, Dads and
(03:02):
Daddy's with Brian Rubin Sauers. Together, Brian a literal dad
of two and just and chat about their life as
hot father figures, sharing personal stories from parenthood, daddy hood, love, marriage, addiction, recovery,
and so much more.
Speaker 1 (03:14):
Please welcome to Stuffy's Cruising Confessions. Judson Morrow, How you doing?
Speaker 2 (03:17):
Hey, guys, what a pleasure to be on this side
of the mic than you ever having are so, Judson,
I'm very excited to have you here.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Before we dive deep into daddydom, I was hoping you
could tell me a little bit about the Dads and
Daddy's podcast.
Speaker 5 (03:29):
The Dad's and Daddy's Podcast is the product of a
neighborhood friendship. I met Brian Rubin Sauers at a Hanaka
party a couple of years ago, and we kept running
into each other, and one evening this man shows up
with a seventeen slide power point about why I should
be his podcast co host. Brian is a literal dad.
(03:52):
He has two children. He is in an open gay marriage.
I am also in an open gay marriage, although I
don't have children.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
So he's the dad.
Speaker 5 (04:01):
I'm the sexual and spiritual daddy, and we talk about
everything that it means to be an adult gay man
in the modern world. Cruising Breakups, hookups, sex party etiquette,
and then we have tons of guests coming on healers,
sex workers, authors, scientists. So I have to ask, how
would you define a daddy. I'm going to make it oppositional.
(04:24):
What a daddy is not. A dom top with a
salt and pepper beard with a one point seven to
one shoulder to waist ratio does not a daddy make
There is overlap, absolutely, but the piece that's missing is
that daddy is the service role that makes it age agnostic,
(04:44):
position agnostic, fem mask agnostic, esthetic agnostic, and it's really
just the person who provides coaching, guidance, mentorship and a
space to learn. Not everyone knows what they want, and
even when they find that out, they don't know how
to ask for that, so that daddy creates that space
(05:05):
for their sons.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
I love this definition.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
For so long I've been operating on like the Supreme
Court porn definition of daddydom.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
I've been like, I know a daddy when I see it, right.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
But thinking of it again as age agnostic and gender
agnostic is something that makes it so much more expansive
and so much more fun. Right, think of it as
a service role rather than a literal father figure, and
I get right. For some people, that's sort of the
turn on, this sort of classic father figure in that
service role.
Speaker 5 (05:30):
I'm a daddy son switch yeah, in the same way
that I think verse guys are great tops because they
know what it feels like to bottom. I learned so
much by being a good son to other daddies. And
I have a daddy who is twenty three years old.
He is twenty years younger than me, and he just
has it. He is caring, he's compassionate, he creates space.
(05:52):
It's incredible.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
When did this interest in becoming a daddy or sort
of learning more about daddy's begin.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
I have always been into older men.
Speaker 5 (06:02):
When I was eighteen, I had a boyfriend who was
thirty six years old, and yes, the sex was incredible,
but also given how I grew up, he provided a
lot of like love, comfort and space for me to
grow that I wasn't getting in my home life right.
So for me, it's this sort of passing of the
torch that, to be quite honest, the reason that I
(06:23):
think about it so much is that it was actually
sort of thrust upon me as I aged. Once people
started to call me daddy without provocation. I just kind
of owned it, and that's when I moved into a
space where I was like, wait a minute, I've been
doing this the whole time. It's the ownership piece that's
been missing. So I would say I really stepped into
(06:44):
it probably in my late thirties, where I was also
in that sort of sexual icon purgatory where you're like,
am I an uncle?
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Am I an hodd? Or am I a daddy? I
don't really know. So in the last like five years, it.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
Seems like the poles are like daddy and twi, and
then what comes in between is like a mishmash or
kind of salad.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
And I'm curious about the first time you were called daddy.
Speaker 5 (07:06):
The first daddy I ever got, I was on the
L train and this Bushwick twink right across from me goes, okay, Daddy.
Speaker 1 (07:17):
That was the moment I was like, Okay, I've arrived.
Did that lead to anything or was it just kind
of an epiphany for you? Oh?
Speaker 2 (07:24):
We fought, yeah, yeah, yeah, yes.
Speaker 3 (07:26):
I don't know if someone called me daddy. I mean,
they do call me daddy, and I'm always like, I
don't know if I qualify, mainly because you talked about coaching.
Speaker 2 (07:37):
It does require patients, Chris, and that is a thing
I do not possess.
Speaker 3 (07:42):
And so when someone calls me daddy, it's oh no, no,
please don't put that on me, because I don't want
to take on that role.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
I think that's exactly it. That's a choice.
Speaker 5 (07:49):
The marker for daddyness is just claiming it. All you
have to do is say I'm daddy.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
It doesn't have to be.
Speaker 5 (07:56):
Sexual in nature necessarily either, Like you could be the
resume daddy, like I've had jobs. Let me help prove
your Resumehtonic.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
Daddies in the traditional set not everyone's fucking their father
if we're thinking about it in that way.
Speaker 3 (08:11):
I have definitely played daddy to a lot of younger
artists and people who are like breaking into the industry.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
So you are daddy, yes, Boomer.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
But I was gonna say, now that you mentioned it,
I think Chris might be my like backstage daddy. I
am famous for putting things down and not remembering where
they are, and Chris will just see me looking around
and be like, babe, are you looking for this?
Speaker 2 (08:31):
And we'll pick up the exact thing I'm looking for. Yeah,
So you you might be my dressing room daddy. Great, okay, great, yes,
backstage daddy. I love daddies. See, you just have to
own it, so Jenson.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
So we've been talking about it. Feels like daddies are
are very much in the zeitgeist right now. Daddies are
having a moment and identifying as a daddy can often
make you more desirable to some younger gay men. But
what was a common view of older men or daddies
before now, right from the nineties and earlier. Do you
think there's been kind of a culture shift between now
and I think the shift has a lot to do.
Speaker 5 (09:02):
With the fact that in the eighties and nineties, older
men were seen as the product unfortunately of HIV eight's.
There was a much bigger question mark over their heads
as to whether engaging with them was going to make
you quote unquote and this is the terminology of the time,
(09:22):
not today sick. Right with the advent of prep and
the ability to have what I will call safe, condomless sex.
But I think that stigma has largely gone away, which
makes space for the sort of caretaking and compassion that
younger men might seek from an older daddy.
Speaker 3 (09:41):
Also, I think that there is more daddies around today, right, Like,
there's an entire generation of folks that just don't exist
because of the AIDS pandemic. And I think now they're
just more daddies around, which is lovely, right, And there
will be.
Speaker 5 (09:55):
More daddies because there's just by numbers, there's more of
us who have come out and are living comfortably. By numbers,
there are more people who are living healthy, long lives.
So the daddy generation, if we do want to age
band it is going to be humongous. There is a
lot of opportunity for sons out there if they're looking
for an older man, Like we're here now.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
I see why jd Vance wants to get the birth
rate up. We need more twinks to catch up to
the number of daddies. It all makes sense.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
We're going to be fine. We're going to be fine.
Speaker 1 (10:26):
No, but that's a really good point, right, Like, the
combined stigma of the hva's epidemic, along with the fact
that you're getting generations of folks who are comfortable being
out earlier, You're right, are kind of setting it up
for peak daddy.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
We might be reaching the apex soon.
Speaker 5 (10:38):
There's a third part two and that is because younger
people are coming out sooner and more comfortably. They actually
have each other to experiment with sexually, so much a gift.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
So what a gift?
Speaker 5 (10:52):
Like when we were coming up in the eighties and nineties, like,
we didn't have other teens to have a sexual awakening
with the same way our heterosy actual at least at
that time counterparts were able to write. It sometimes felt
like the only option was an older man because that's
who was out there. So I think a lot of
people now will probably ultimately end up experimenting with their
(11:14):
age group and then graduate, if you will, to daddy
by choice as opposed to by force.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
Daddy by default.
Speaker 1 (11:21):
Yeah, we've heard about the first time you were called daddy,
but I want to know when you met your husband Bruce.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
Shout out to Bruce.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
Hello, hy Bruce, who buy all accounts is a very
sexy daddy as well.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
How did you all meet? What's that story?
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Like?
Speaker 5 (11:35):
I'm going to date the relationship by sharing that we
met on manhunt dot net, the.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
Blue Screen Manhunt Dude's nude Adam for Adam.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
That was my college era.
Speaker 1 (11:46):
That's when I started meeting daddy's because I couldn't find
anyone my age.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
Let's not get it twisted.
Speaker 5 (11:51):
I love Sniffy's, but there is a piece of my
heart that breaks when I talk to someone who's twenty
two and will never know the joys of buying extra credits.
Oh my god, people to open an email and the
content of the email is just okay.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
The indignity of having to pay to send a stranger
your nudes like wild.
Speaker 5 (12:15):
So we met on manhunt dot net. I was sprung
on this man from jump. He answered the door in
crocs sweatpants when sweatpants were not cute. I'm talking like Haines,
scrunchy at the bottom and a ripped T shirt. And
I thought to myself, you thought I was going to
be ugly.
Speaker 2 (12:37):
I showed him who.
Speaker 5 (12:40):
He was, Like, I thought it was just going to
be a fling, Like I liked you, but you were
like twenty seven and pretty messy. I was wildly alcoholic
at the time, So did I see him as a daddy.
There was definitely a part of his life that, at
least as I perceived it, because he lived in Soho
(13:00):
when I first met him, that just perceived stability. Well, yeah,
I love that I'm like he was stable, Yeah, and
at twenty seven, you're kind of looking for that.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
At least I was, right, I was looking for that
stability because I was in an age GOP relationship when
I was in my twenties and then got married at
twenty six, and like there was like the stability that
was like so attractive to me. I was like, yeah,
I give me more of that because my life is
a fucking mess right now.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
That's something I'm so curious about too, right because it
seems like Bruce meets you and he's like, all right,
you were kind of a mess. You were much younger,
which to me implies messy. Do you often see those
reservations work the other way around, where like a younger
person is entering relationship and they're like, oh, you're older,
you want to have kids, and like get a house.
I'm in my twenties, I gotta sew my wild oats.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
Yes.
Speaker 5 (13:51):
Absolutely, I think for younger people there is a huge
opportunity cost. It's like, ooh, you're twenty years older than me,
Like you've had all the opportunity and like maybe know
exactly what you want and I don't necessarily want to
like pigeonhole my desires or the outcome of my life
toward your idea of success. I think the flip side
(14:13):
of seeing younger people as a little messy is that
the older gentleman in this scenario can be a little
more set in his ways, especially if he's been independent
for a long time, and it gets a little harder
as the older person to incorporate someone new, especially someone
young who's still on the path of self discovery.
Speaker 1 (14:35):
No.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
Absolutely, I dated a younger person last year and I
really was like struggling.
Speaker 2 (14:40):
I was like, this is wild.
Speaker 3 (14:42):
Is this what people have been doing with me for
all these years? Like they just lived a completely different
life than I did. I just was like, you are
a wild individual, and I sn't know how you live
your life.
Speaker 5 (14:53):
I think sometimes you can get into the daddy sun
dynamic and your son is a little too stubborn.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
It's like, oh, this actually is not a match.
Speaker 5 (15:03):
And it's not because I'm trying to necessarily like dominate
or control, but like the willingness to be instructed, cared for,
mentored is critical to this back and forth.
Speaker 2 (15:15):
And if you're gonna do what you're just gonna do,
let me know that and we can move into that. No, right,
we can.
Speaker 5 (15:22):
Easily switch and move into that, but we're we're cutting
off access to the daddy dum.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
So we have talked a little bit.
Speaker 1 (15:28):
About some of the challenges, but I would like to
talk about the fun parts of having sex. What do
you think is hot about sex with daddy and what
is it that makes them appealing to you specifically as well?
Speaker 5 (15:39):
They just know what they're doing, and that feels so
good because I may I may not even know that
I'm into something until I am introduced to it by
like a really, really proficient practitioner, and then you're.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
Just like, okay, like this is absolutely a thing now.
Speaker 5 (15:59):
So that is I think the broad appeal for me specifically,
it's different now than it was before when I was
hooking up with daddies. Previously it was more of the
sun roll and to be cared for. And now when
I hook up with daddi's it's really a learning opportunity
for me. Like I love to hear daddy talk tracks,
(16:20):
I love to see how they move their body, I
love how they manage the dom sub relationship. It's so
much for me to become a better daddy to hook
up with other daddies.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
There's just so much for me to learn. What's something
that you've learned from your partner?
Speaker 2 (16:36):
Yeah, specifically sexually?
Speaker 1 (16:39):
Oh, specifically sexually, something you Bruce introduced you to, or
something that you were like early on in dating, you
were like.
Speaker 5 (16:44):
Oh, when Bruce and I met, I because I was
smaller of stature and younger at the time, saw myself
as a bottom. I think this is part of the
journey for a lot of gay men, right, Yeah. And
then when I'm at him, he is also a bottom,
I would say ninety seven percent of the time, and
(17:04):
it's like, well, what are we going to do?
Speaker 2 (17:05):
Just like rub our butts together, It's like the other
end of the scissors.
Speaker 5 (17:11):
Yeah, right, So I learned two things from him. I
learned how to be a better top because I got
so much practice with him. And I learned how to
be a better bottom because he had so much more
practice out of than me anything, right, like different positions,
better ways to clean out. I've learned so much just
(17:32):
about the basics. And I think that's a big reason
that we're open too, because I still like to bottom,
and again, we're not just going to rub our butts together.
He wants me to experience the joy that he experiences
as a bottom, and that requires other people outside of
the relationship.
Speaker 2 (17:50):
Yeah, there really is no greater experience than bottoming. I
can't think of one.
Speaker 1 (17:57):
I'm sorry, I thought that was going to keep going,
and you're just like, no, no, no, that's so that's
actually the best experience you can have in life is bottoming.
Speaker 4 (18:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:05):
I mean mazo realistics out there, speaking of of assumptions
and sort of archetypes that might be incorrect that we've
had thrust upon us. I think with a lot of
the age gap discourse that we see online, especially today,
there's this assumption that anyone older is automatically predatory if
they're hooking up with younger people, which is obviously very
(18:27):
broad generalization. That can happen, it doesn't always happen. So
what are some healthy ways you see people navigating age
gaps and some of the differences.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
That might come up from that in relationships.
Speaker 5 (18:37):
I think you have to enter age gap relationships in
good faith. Let's not get it twisted. When I had
the Internet and access to a car, I absolutely lied
about my age right As a safety I use what
I call at math if they are twenty one or younger,
I subtract five, and if they're fifty five or older,
I add five. Right, So that's actually super we're helpful.
(19:00):
Oh you're twenty one, you're sixteen? Oh god, wow, You're
not going to.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
Always be able to like check the ID.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
Right.
Speaker 5 (19:09):
But I do think you have to know, especially if
you are the older person, which I am in this situation,
that you are the one in charge. If you don't
want that thrust upon you, you're not ready to have
this kind of relationship with anybody, right. I remember I
was in high school and I was pursuing these older men,
(19:30):
and then I became the age of these older men
and lived on the same block as a high school
and as I would walk by on the way to
the train, I thought.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
Oh my god, like these are babies. Like what were
these men seeing in me? Right?
Speaker 5 (19:44):
So I think that's where the sort of problematic discourse
comes from. You, as the older person, although daddy can
be a diagnostic, do have to take the responsibility of
being the adult.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
In the room.
Speaker 3 (19:55):
All Right, when we come back, we're gonna hear justin
SIPs for cruising for both daddies and sons.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
Sniffy's Cruising Confessions after the break. Welcome back to Sniffy's
Cruising Confessions. That was good boys, Say yes sir by
Chris Kannick.
Speaker 3 (20:11):
Now we've heard about how Judson landed a very sexy
daddy as his sould me. But now we're going to
hear his expert advice on how to cruise for Daddy's. So, Judson,
what are the first steps for our listeners who are
interested in cruising for Daddy's.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
Well, for anybody cruising anybody.
Speaker 5 (20:25):
Before we get to the specifics, I always like to
treat it as a zero sum game. You didn't know
the person before you said hello, you didn't know the
person before you sent them a message on Sniffy's and
if they don't respond and the way that you want,
you just get to go back to your life as normal.
I think that is a great mentality across the board
(20:46):
for Daddy's looking for sons. One trap I think is
coming off a little too strong. Your son may not
know that that's exactly what he wants and needs. I
think tative it's not the right word, but not as
aggressive as you might be in the context of something
(21:07):
like a dad's and lads party where you know, that's
exactly what they're looking for. I think for sons specifically
looking for daddies. Even though we're the one driving the car,
where the mentor the teacher, the coach, we are also
gay men and love to be wooed, and it's just
as easy as just approaching us with a hello. Like
(21:29):
I mentioned earlier, the guy in the oltrain, all he
said was okay, daddy, and that was enough to engage.
Speaker 2 (21:35):
Yeah. What are your thoughts in eagerness? Oh, aka thirst?
Speaker 3 (21:41):
I think there's a slight difference between those two things,
but yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
It's a very fine line. It's a very very fine
line between eagerness and thirsty.
Speaker 5 (21:49):
Yeah, and you don't see it until it's been crossed, right,
Like there's that exact moment where you're like too much. Right,
My thoughts on eagerness are or that if it is
in earnest and if it is following the sort of
role play that you have created, then it's a go.
(22:09):
I'm communicating with a boy, a son on Sniffy's right now,
and his eagerness comes across as so sincere. The problem
is when an eagerness online just sort of falls off
when you try to make the actual plan right. And
that is not daddy sun specific, that is life on
the apps anymore. But I feel like eagerness is welcome
(22:32):
as long as you can back it.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
Up with your booty.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
Are there scenarios where like daddies might be diving in
a bit too eagerly, or maybe the supportive or daddy
figure is like the more eager one and not quite ready.
Speaker 5 (22:44):
Although I have said that to be a daddy is
just to claim that you are a daddy, please know
that if you are new to the experience, it might
land with certain sons as an experience or rushed like,
you'll have room to grow and learn. I think the
most important thing is to recognize is that it's something
(23:05):
that you want for yourself. And I think, like in
so many things, you'll only find out by failing fast,
that you need to You need to study up, spend
time with other daddies.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
Daddy support, groudad collective.
Speaker 3 (23:20):
Yes, what if you're interested in purely sex? How do
you approach a dad's son relationship in that way?
Speaker 5 (23:26):
People who listen to the Dad's and Daddy's Pod have
heard me say this ad nauseum, open, honest, direct, open
honest direct, open honest direct. If you are exclusively looking
for a daddy sun dynamic in a sex only relationship,
have that in your profile.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
Let people know quickly.
Speaker 5 (23:45):
It's just that easy, especially in the modern world where
people are moving quickly, they have a lot of other
things to do.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
I think directness is a kindness.
Speaker 5 (23:55):
You just have to advertise and be okay if someone
wants more than that, and be okay if someone's not
into that.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
We've talked a little bit about the difference and experiences
growing up with HIV AIDS depending on your age, But
what do you think is good advice for navigating safer sex,
whatever that means between an older and a younger partner.
Speaker 5 (24:14):
I think, as a product of when I grew up,
I understand exactly what it feels like to be so
scared of sex and then have something like prep introduced
into my life and to finally, finally, finally get to
have the sex of the nineteen seventies that I idealized, right,
like the post stone wall, pre aids, back of a
(24:36):
truck sex right. And I think if you are the
older person in the relationship, you have to understand that
not everyone is growing up in that same environment or
feels that same kind of relief. So you have to
give your younger partner a lot of grace on their
journey with what they define as a safe sexual practice.
And if you are the younger partner, it is absolutely
(24:58):
up to you to decide what you are more or
most comfortable with. It's really important to be having these
conversations with your doctor or primary care physician to understand
exactly what options are available for you. I'll share with
you something that I didn't get until my mid thirties,
and that was I had a therapist tell me you
never have to have sex with anyone that you don't
(25:19):
want to, and that extends to save sex practices.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
All right, j justsin. We've had so much fun today.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
I feel like I'm walking away with a much more
expansive idea of what daddy daddy nis daddy dom is
in my head.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
So thank you for that.
Speaker 1 (25:32):
But before we let you go, I would love a
cruising confession of your own today about having sex with
the daddy or having sex while you were the daddy.
Speaker 2 (25:41):
Oh, I'm going to give you both. Yes, We've got time.
Speaker 5 (25:44):
This summer I graduated from high school. I was eighteen
years old, and I cannot even remember how I met
this guy, but he was tall and broad shouldered and
mustached and just beautiful. And he and his partner invited
me into their home for the summer to be their
what houseboy, and I would just do all the things
(26:08):
like I would cook, I would clean, I painted their
fucking garage, and then they would fuck the shit out
of me.
Speaker 2 (26:14):
It was so so amazing.
Speaker 5 (26:17):
Wow, I was eighteen years old, and it just like
expanded my entire understanding of all of it.
Speaker 2 (26:23):
Where are they now? My hottest experience as a daddy.
Speaker 5 (26:29):
I met this guy in the neighborhood on Sniffy's and
he is so good at what he does. He has
made me enjoy something that I don't gravitate toward at all,
and that is specifically getting my dick sucked. Don't love it,
have never been into it. Controversial opinion. I would much
prefer handy because of the grip. Anyway, I have never
(26:52):
even seen this guy naked, which makes it so hot.
He always leaves the door unlocked and is on his
knees in his lip room in a T shirt and shorts,
and he is the best cocksucker I have ever met
in my entire life, and he is I would say,
the best son I've ever had because he is so responsive,
(27:12):
he's so communicative. Sometimes he likes it rough, sometimes he
wants me to be mean. He is such a good boy.
He makes me so proud, and I have never experienced
in my entire life someone that just gets so much
joy out of sucking a dick. And that is why
I love to be of service to him. When you
(27:34):
have a relationship like that, because he's probably my most
hooked up with person ever beyond my husband, you develop
even more of a relationship. Like we definitely drop into
the roles the minute I walk in the door. And
after we're done, he gets me a seltzer out of
the fridge because he knows I'm sober, and we talk
about book, movie and show recommendations.
Speaker 2 (27:55):
And then we go on with our day. Oh that's
so fun.
Speaker 5 (27:58):
Yeah, I've never hung out other wise. This entire relationship
exists in his living room once a month.
Speaker 2 (28:05):
Amazing.
Speaker 3 (28:06):
All right, when we come back, we're going to hear
an actual cruising confession from one of our listeners. Stay tuned, Yes,
all right, this season, we're doing things a little bit differently,
and we wanted to bring our Sniffy's Cruising Confessions audience
into the conversation. So at the end of every episode
this season, we're going to listen to an actual cruising
confession from one of you.
Speaker 2 (28:24):
Yes, that's right.
Speaker 1 (28:25):
For better or worse, Sniffy set up a call in
hotline where users can leave voicemails about their hottest, weirdest,
or most outrageous true cruising stories, and we're going to
listen to them live for context. Neither of us have
courage this story before. No, I am thrilled, horrified, really excited.
So let's see what we got.
Speaker 2 (28:46):
The park was hot.
Speaker 4 (28:51):
One time I went to the park to the bathroom, okay,
and I saw me in there and he was just
my dick the whole time. I was like, why does
he look so familiar? Whenever we stopped and went out
in separate ways. He has my name and I didn't
tell my name, and I heard his name and then
(29:12):
I was like, oh my god. I told my friends
and was asking me if they could verify who my
friend's dad was because they just sucked my drink in
the bathroom.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (29:25):
Okay, speaking of literal fathers, speaking of literal fathers.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
Yeah, literal fathers.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
Okay, Wow, should we take this in chronological order? So yeah,
I yeah, so many feelings, so many beats to that
story that I mean, I'm really into into it. First
of all, Yeah, you were using a public bathroom in
a park. We know you don't live in New York
because those aren't here. Okay, so good on you for
living in a place where your public parks are well
funded and kept up by the city government. All right, right,
(29:56):
starts off as a very standard cruising story. Yeah, room,
someone follows you in, You're like, okay, this could be dangerous,
but could be hot. And then they get into the bathroom. Yeah, okay,
they do the deed. They do the deed, And I
like that we don't spend that much time talking about
the sucking itself. No, because that's not the point of
the story, right, that's not the climax, Baby, that's not
the climax you thought it was.
Speaker 2 (30:15):
This is wild, Yeah, No, it's this idea of like, God,
you look familiar, right, how.
Speaker 1 (30:22):
Do I know you? And then I love that the
familiarity was not something that this person addressed during the hookup. Yes,
they were like We're gonna keep this to dick sucking
in the bathroom only. Yeah, and then I'm gonna call
up one of my girls and be like, is this
your dad?
Speaker 2 (30:33):
Can you please confirm? Is this your dad? Please confirm?
I want an update? Did they hook up again?
Speaker 1 (30:41):
I know?
Speaker 2 (30:41):
Can we get? I would? I would love? And so did?
Was this the thing? Did you? Was it a regular thing?
Speaker 1 (30:48):
Like?
Speaker 2 (30:49):
Because why not?
Speaker 1 (30:50):
I'm gonna be honest, I have never ever ever run
into a friend's parent on any dating app, at any party.
What are these magical towns where where every hot closeted
dad is just like waiting on.
Speaker 2 (31:03):
A park bench. Just suck your daw. I good thing.
Speaker 1 (31:06):
You and your friends don't go cruising together, right, because
you would have maybe they might have had a very different.
Speaker 2 (31:10):
Experience in that baun. Yeah, yeah, that would have been
awkward though. Yeah. Well, we were wishing you and.
Speaker 1 (31:19):
From under the math room you just see the mouth
through the You're like, dad, is that you you recognize? This?
Speaker 2 (31:25):
Neger is the Lofers. It's familiar, the crocs, the not thees.
Speaker 3 (31:32):
Y'all.
Speaker 1 (31:33):
If you see Sperry's tapping at you from a restall,
that's a Republican senator.
Speaker 2 (31:37):
Okay, get out, get out, not the Sperries, damn.
Speaker 1 (31:43):
If you could call back, please let us know if
you hooked up again and what footwear he had on.
Those are two crucial things, Chris and I would love
to know. Thank you for that amazing confession. That was
really really great. If you are listening and you'd like
to hear your own cruising confessions on an upcoming episode
of this podcast, you can call our Cruising Confessions hotline
at three O two two one nine three eight nine eight,
(32:05):
and again it is three zero two two one nine
three eight nine eight. I would love to hear your
bat shit sexts. I'm very excited. Yeah, great way to
cap off. This episode was spectacular. Absolutely, I had so
much fun with Judson. I feel like I came in
with a very static idea of what a daddy was
for me. I always thought it was like an archetype,
you know, like like muscle Queen or Otter or Twink.
(32:28):
And understanding that for a lot of folks, daddy is
sort of a role and maybe a subdom dynamic.
Speaker 3 (32:33):
That that was exactly it, right, Like I understood more
about how expansive the term daddy could be right, and
I was able to see myself in that role, just
not in the way that I had thought of it previously.
I don't really just you know, describe myself as a man,
but I could definitely be a daddy.
Speaker 2 (32:50):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
We got non binary daddies, we got cis women as daddies.
It's we got all sorts of daddies. And I think
this is also going to help me be more clear
maybe moving forward, because I'm very into daddy so I think,
you know, being more clear about what I want and
again our listeners, being clear about what you want with
any scenario, whether there's a power dynamic that is different
because of age, economic background, whatever it is, Right, this
(33:14):
was a great reminder to be more intentional my communications
and with my language. Yeah, I do want to thank
our guest today, Justsen Morrow from the Dads and Daddies podcast.
You can listen to the podcast at Dadsanddaddies dot com
spelled exactly the way you think it is, and you
can also follow them at Dads and Daddies on both
Instagram and TikTok. To learn even more about cruising, four Dads,
(33:35):
Sniffy's cruising Confessions is directed by Adam Barron, produced by
Amanda Kuper and cameraon Femino, and executive produced by Eli Martin.
Speaker 3 (33:42):
Cruising Confessions is presented by Snippy's, the ultimate map based
cruising platform, pre k by in Curious Peetol Ready to
Cruise check out the map at snippies dot com and
fall Snichey's at snippys app.
Speaker 1 (33:52):
Cruisers are a community. Do your part in keeping us safe.
Learn more about protecting your sexual help at Healthy Sexuals
dot com.
Speaker 2 (34:00):
Pot job, pot poat job, pot pot job post ya
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, And Charlamagne Tha God!