July 12, 2025 • 52 mins
Today's episode of Sunday Service by Pray.com features Dr. Jeff Schwartzentraub
Pastor Jeff Schwarzentraub delivers a heartfelt Father’s Day message, emphasizing the vital role of dads as spiritual leaders. Reflecting on Brave Church’s powerful High Five youth event, he celebrates the impact of godly fathers and challenges men to speak truth, model Christlike leadership, and bless the next generation with their presence, guidance, and love.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hereby perceive we the love of God, because He laid
down his life for us, and we ought to lay
down our lives for the brethren. One John three sixteen.
Dear God, we live in a world full of demands
and distractions. There will be moments when others will pull
me in different directions and my to do list is endless.
(00:23):
Please remind me to be present in my faith when
these situations arise. Please help me to let go of
everything else going on and focus my heart and attention
toward You. May I always surrender to You in prayer,
no matter how overwhelming my day may be. Amen, thank
(00:44):
you for listening to today's daily prayer for more inspiration
and an incredible message from our feature pastor. Stay tuned
to pray dot COM's Sunday service.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
A Happy Father's Day to all the fathers that are
here today. Special day. I'm going to dedicate the message
today to that. Also. I just want to add my
comments to High five week. So had nearly a thousand
students here, a thousand kids here this week. Also had
over five hundred volunteers, six hundred volunteers something like that,
(01:21):
and it's a massive undertaking. I just want to say
from my heart tears, we have some of the greatest
volunteers anywhere in the world that serve at Brave Church.
We really do to serve in this camp. Some people
were up at six in the morning, leaving here at
four in the afternoon, doing it day after day. Some
people took off a week of work so they could
come serve, to see the eternal rewards that would happen.
(01:45):
And just to give you an indication. When we started
our church, very first service we had about we had
it not about. We had two hundred and eight people.
We counted everybody. We had two hundred and eight people.
Last year at High five we celebrated we had seventy
eight kids give their lives to Christ. This year. Listen, listen,
this year, not only we have kids give their lives
to Christ, we got to follow up with every kid
make sure they understood their decision. Every kid that made
(02:06):
a decision, we gave them a Bible. Every kid that
got a Bible, we called their family let them know
what had taken place. Can I just tell you this
year we had two hundred and ninety four kids give
their lives to Jesus. Love me so again, Thank you,
Thank you so much for your prayers, thanks for all
that God is doing through you. I want to let
(02:27):
you know our church has always stepped up when we've
had events, whether it be our Warrior Summit, whether it
be our women's events, whether it's been doing things at
band a Mere Speedway or different things. You're a church
that loves to serve and the lords Poleae so thank
you so much. With them, welcome all the campuses that
are here today. And without any further Ado, let me
pray and let's get into the word today. Would you
pray with me? Our Father in heaven, we give you
(02:49):
all the glory, honor and praise for who you are.
And Lord, we ask you that during this message that
you would be helpful to us. We thank you, Father
for the gift of your son Jesus Christ, who died
for our sin and rose from the dead, and the
gift of your Holy Spirit who dwells each one of
us who believes. And Lord, we ask today as we
look in your word, that you'd be helpful to us
so that we could hear your voice, because we as
(03:10):
a people believe that every time your word is faithfully
and accurately proclaimed, that you are speaking So our prayer
this morning is speak Lord, for we are ready to hear.
And so now for all those who have gathered who
desire to hear the Lord Jesus Christ, speak directly to
your heart. Who will believe what he tells you and
who will buy faith put into practice what he shows you?
Will you agree with me very loudly this morning by
(03:31):
saying the word a men, Amen. I'm fond of saying,
so go the men, so goes the church, so goes
the church, so goes the world. If you want to
change the world, you have to change men's perspective that
they would align with the Lord Jesus Christ. Because when
men align with the Lord Jesus Christ, everything changes. And
(03:54):
today I want to talk about why we should fight
for fathers and why fathers should fight for their family,
like why should should we do that? On Mother's Day,
I gave a message to all the mothers as to
why mothers matter, and it was really important because moms
are the fabric of a home and a fabric of
the next generation in society. But I also think it's
important that we address fathers. Now, when I say the
(04:14):
word father, it usually has an emotion that comes with
it for some of us. We grew up in homes
with great dads. We love our dads. Some of us
wish our dad would have been a little bit better.
Others of us. When I say the word father, it's
a terrible, terrible thing in your heart because your dad
did not live a godly life in your home. And
you saw the ramifications of that. A couple things before
(04:37):
I get started. If you don't have a good father,
here's what God promises. He will be a father to
the father less, and he's a good, good father. Amen.
The reason, however, we need to talk about fathers is
because Jesus was always talking about his father. If you
study the life of Jesus Christ, and you go through
(04:58):
any of the Gospels and you read them, and he said,
what does Jesus care about the most? It's his father.
It's who he always wanted to spend time with. At
the age of twelve, when they were traveling from Jerusalem
back to Galilee, they couldn't find Jesus with him, so
Joseph and Mary had to go back and at the
age of twelve they found him in the temple and
when they said where were you, he said, did you
(05:18):
not know I had to be in my father's house.
Throughout jesus ministry, he was always sneaking away to be
with his father, and Mark one thirty five says, very
early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus
got up and went to solitary places. Were there he prayed.
He was spending time with his father. The night before
he picked his twelve apostles out of all of his disciples,
he stayed up all night praying to his father. Before
(05:41):
he walked on the water. What was he doing. He
was up on a mountain side praying to his father.
When he was in the garden of Gsemite, before he
was ready to go be crushed for the sins of
the world, he was praying to his father. Even on
the cross as he was getting crucified, he was saying, Father,
forgive them, for they know not what to do what
they did. And even when the disciples said, Lord teaches
(06:02):
us to pray, how did he teach us to pray
our father? If you want to know who Jesus cared about,
it was his father. As a matter of fact, one incident,
actually a couple incidents. I believe it was two different
incidents in the life of Jesus was when we see
him do something that we think that doesn't sound very
Jesus like. And it was when he was in the
(06:22):
temple and they had turned the temple into a place
to profit for themselves, and he took out a whip
and started driving people out and throwing tables over. Why
because my father's house, she'll be called the house of prayer.
But you've made it to Denna Robbers. Who was he protecting,
who was he spending time with, Who was he around
his father? And God designed fathers for the family, and
(06:45):
they play an extraordinary, extraordinary role, an exceptional role in
the home for what God wants to get done. So
today I want to talk to you about why we
fight for fathers and why fathers should fight for their
family and to do that, we're going to be in
Malachi chapter four, the last two verses in the Old Testament,
Malachi chapter four, verses five and six. That's where we're
gonna spend our time. But I'll frame it for you
(07:08):
because we're gonna look at that whole chapter six verses.
Just just set it up because in the book of Malachi,
what was going on the people of Israel, of the day.
Were not bringing God their best. They were kind of
bringing God their half baked ideas. They're kind of good stuff.
They weren't going all in on their tithes and their offerings.
They weren't going all in on their marriages. They were
not doing what God wanted them to do. And so
(07:30):
he sent them the prophet Malachi to say, hey, this
is the way. Walk in this, do these things. And
then at the very end he writes these passages. And
this is the last thing you're gonna hear in your
Old Testament. Then there's four hundred years of silence before
we come to Jesus Christ. So these are the last
words of the Old Testament. So hear what the Lord says.
He says this, for behold, the day is coming burning
(07:52):
like a furnace, and all the arrogant and evil doer
will be chaff. And the day that is coming will
set them ablaze, says the Lord of Hosts, so that
it will leave them neither root nor branch. But for
you who fear my name, the Son of Righteousness will
rise with healing in its wings, and you will go
forth and skip like calves from the stall. You will
(08:15):
tread down the wicked, for they will be ashes under
the soles of your feet on the day which I'm preparing,
says the Lord of Oast. Remember the law of Moses,
my servant, even the statutes and ordinances which I commanded
him in Horeb and all Israel. So here's what he's saying.
He's saying, there's coming to day where I'm gonna judge everyone,
and those who are evil are going to experience the
(08:35):
fullness of all my judgment. But for those who have righteousness,
it's gonna be one of the most glorious days. They're
going to be skipping like calves coming out of the stall,
and the wicked will be like ashes under their feet.
Then he tells them just remember all the law that
I gave to Moses. And then he settles in on
these two final verses, and here's what he says. Behold,
(08:56):
I am going to send you Elijah, the Prophet, before
the coming of the g and terrible day of the Lord.
He will restore the hearts of the fathers to their children,
and the hearts of the children to their fathers, so
that I will not come and smite the land with
a curse. And here in those final two verses. I
want to talk about why we should fight for fathers
and why fathers should fight for their family. And today
(09:17):
I'm going to give you three reasons why with an
application on each, so that you understand, as dads what
you must do. And here's why we must fight for
fathers and why fathers must fight for their family. And
it's this. It's because the world is lying to your family.
The world is lying to your family, so use your
prophetic voice. The world is lying to your family, so
(09:39):
use your prophetic voice. Throughout history, God always sends profits
when things are out of a line in the culture
with what God wants to see done. And a prophetic
voice confronts the decline of the society and makes plain
and clear what the ways of the Lord should look like,
and that here's how you should walk in it. So
God says, I'm going to send you Elijah the Prophet
(10:03):
before the coming of the Great and terrible Day of
the Lord. Now he also sent John the Baptist, who
the Bible says came in the spirit and power of Elijah.
But God is one day going to send Elijah before
the Great and terrible Day of the Lord. Because the
word promises that he will. Now here's what was going on.
Elijah the prophet in his day. You remember what was
going on. The nation was trying to decide whether we
(10:25):
should worship the true God or should worship the bales.
And so God sent Elijah the prophet to make sure
that they knew that they were going the wrong way
and that they needed to go the right way. And
in One Kings, chapter eighteen, verse twenty one, you hear
what was going on. Elijah came near to the people
and said, how long will you hesitate between two opinions?
(10:46):
If the Lord is God, follow him, but if bail
follow him. But the people did not answer him a word.
When prophets come, they bring a sense of urgency to
a situation. They say. The cultures saying this, it's all confusing.
Let me make it really, really clear to you what
God's saying, so you're not confused anymore, and then you
decide if you want to walk in God's way or not.
(11:07):
As a pastor, one of my roles as a pastor
is to have a prophetic voice, so I can say
things to you that in this culture of confusion that
we live in, say, well, this is what God says,
and this is what his word says. So you don't
need to be confused about this anymore. If you want
to walk God's way, do that. John the Baptist was
raised up to do the very same thing, to prepare
(11:28):
the way of the Lord. And so when he came,
we hear him say, repent for the Kingdom of Heaven
is at hand. In other words, get ready, the Messiah
is coming. That's what prophets do. Prophets prepare people because
one day they know every person that they're talking to
ultimately stands judgment before Almighty God. So I want to
prepare you for what that looks like. That's what a
prophet does. Dad's listen to me. You have a prophetic
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voice in your family. In the cultural confusion that your
family is in. You're the one that brings clarity to
this is what God says, say, this is how you
should walk, This is how you should do it. I'm
here to walk with you. Let's go do this together.
And Dad's that is your role to speak the truth
(12:12):
to your family. Amen, and to speak it. Now, when
I talk about prophetic I'm not talking about coming up
with new ideas that nobody's ever heard I'm talking about
speaking the truth of God's word that most people don't
agree with. So I came up with a list of
ten that I say from this pulpit often, just to
give you an idea what prophetic looks like. Now, if
you hear these and you love the Lord, all ten
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of them, you'll be like, Amen, nobody's talking like this.
If you don't, some of them may hurt a little bit.
And if you don't know Jesus, all of these will
be an equal opportunity offender. Okay, so just listen to these.
These are just ten. I mean, I have scriptural support
for each one. We won't go in but number one.
In this world where we don't know whether evolution's true
or how the world got here, here's what the Bible teaches.
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God created the world out of nothing in six literal
days and rested on the seventh period. End of story.
That's prophetic truth. Like, you don't need to wonder about
how did we get here? You know? Okay? Number two,
God created male and female as the only two genders. Amen.
Everything contrary to that is a lie. What He decided
in utero is final. Even if you try to rebel
(13:18):
against God's divine order. That's prophetic. It's true. The Word
teaches that marriage. Marriage is a covenant before God between
one man and one woman for life, and there is
no other form of marriage according to the Word of God.
That's prophetic. How about this one. There's only one race,
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the human race. That's it. There are no other races.
There's one race. It's the human race. And that's why
CRTDI BLM. All those that cause division are satanically inspired ideologies.
They're wrong one hundred percent of the time. Okay, people
are not saved by works. Your work's don't count when
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you get to heaven. If you try to tell God
you're good outweighed your bad, that doesn't matter. You are
only saved by grace through faith in Jesus Christ alone,
through his death on the cross and his resurrection from
the dead. How about this one. Serving the local church
and using your spiritual gifts is God's plan a for
reaching the world. If you're born again and if you
want to have an impact for Jesus, the lion's share
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of your gifts, the lion's share of your finances, the
lion's share of your time should go to a local
church where you are pushing the agenda of the Great Commission. Amen.
How about this one, Life begins at conception. Abortion is
always murder because taking an innocent life is always evil,
period true. I don't say that with venom in my heart.
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I say it with love in my heart. I say
it because I know there's a third of you women
here who have had them. And I want to tell
you on the authority of Jesus Christ, there is complete
forgiveness and healing. But it doesn't change the fact that
this is true. How about this one. God still has
a covenant plan for Israel. He blesses the nations that
bless them, and he judges those who don't. Just so
(15:08):
you know in the news this week, where's brave stand
I and brave stand completely with the nation of Israel.
And then, because God has a plan for the nation
of Israel about number nine, Jesus is the only way
to the Father. All other past religions, books, ideologies all
lead to destruction. And then finally, I'll tell you this
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hell is real and without Jesus, people go there every
day for eternity. I mean that that's prophetic truth. Now,
if you're a believer, even if you're not clapping, and
you're like, oh, that's why I go to Brave. I
love this pastor, Jeff. You're not afraid to say anything
that's not true. What I am willing to do is
preach what God says. Amen. If you're not a believer
or you're not seizoned in the words, some of those
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things may come across as offensive. That's what the prophetic
word does. And Dad's in your home. Even when you're
telling truth from the Word of God doesn't mean that
it's always received and your kids are like, thank you, Dad,
I needed Sometimes it's a course correction for what needs
to happen. But your voice in your family likely means
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more than any other voice that your wife or your
kids will ever hear. Your voice carries weight. That's why
there some of you in here that are my age
or even older that wish that your dad would have
been a prophetic voice in your life, that wish your
dad would have spoken to you, that wish your dad
would have told you how much he loves you. And
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it's really interesting because in the scriptures there's two different accounts.
One is that the amount of transfiguration when Jesus transfigures
himself and is all beautiful, and Moses and Elijah show
up with Peter, James and John, and God Father speaks
to him audibly. And the other time is that the
baptism of Jesus, when Jesus came up out of the water,
God the Father spoke to him audibly so that everybody
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could hear. And that's the one I want to look
at today, because in Matthew, when Jus was baptized, starting
in verse sixteen, it says this. It says, after being baptized,
Jesus came up immediately from the water, and behold, the
heavens were opened, and he saw the Spirit of God
descending as a dove and lighting on him. So Jesus
is in the water, the Holy Spirit's in the shape
(17:17):
of a dove coming down on him. And notice this,
and behold a voice out of the heavens said, this
is my beloved son, in whom I am well pleased.
Who's speaking them that's the Father. That's the Father, the
Father speaking over his son. Now you may wonder why
did he speak it out loud. He spoke it out
loud so the people there would hear, and that it
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could be in scripture, and that we would hear because
Jesus spent all his time with his dad. Why do
you think he was always sneaking away to be with
his dad, Because when he did, that's all he was hearing.
This is my beloved son, whom I love, and him
I am well pleased listen to him. I'm proud of him.
So what was God the Father saying about his son
that can be interesting for us and understandable for us
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as to how we need to speak to our kids.
Notice this, he says, my son, my son, you belong
to me. You have significance and value because your mind
it means this. Stand with your kids. Be proud of them.
Let them know that they belong to you. Let them
know by belonging to you, that they have significance in
this world, that they mean a lot to you. This
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is my son, he belongs to me like you. Better
take care of him. Right then, he says, whom I love. Fathers,
I want you to know this. Speak to your kids,
I mean, fathers. Let them hear their value and their
identity from you. Moms cannot bring the same level of
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value and identity as a father can. Dads, it is
your job to speak to your kids. About what they
are good at, and to call those things out of them.
That's your job as a father. Your job is to
bring their identity out, to bring their value. But if
your kids hear anything from you, it should be how
valuable they are, how unique they are, how special they are.
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You belong to me, and I see all this greatness
in you, and you pull it out and then notice
what else he says, in whom I am well pleased.
So you're not even gonna stand with your kids and
speak to your kids, but showcase your kids. Let them
know their significance, let them know how proud you are
of them, Let them know how grateful you are for them.
Like if you can call these things out in here,
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I mean, if Jesus, who's God in flesh, was hearing
this from his dad all the time, how much more
do we need to hear it? See every single one
of us and every single one of our kids, where
is an invisible sign saying please let me know I'm valuable,
Please let me know I'm important, Please let me know
I'm significant. Please let me know that you're proud of me. Dad,
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Would you please tell me and all of us have
an itch in our hearts. We can't scratch until our
dad gives it to us. And I didn't realize this,
so I was about twenty eight or twenty nine a
I heard a guy speaking in our church one time.
His name was Bill Glass, and Bill Glass played in
the NFL and he did prison ministry, and he was
talking about this verse and he said this. He said,
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a song's not a song until you sing it, and
a bell's not a bell till you ring it, and
a blessing is not a blessing until you speak it.
And he began to talk about fatherless families and the
challenge to fatherless family. I mean, think about this. If
you go into the prisons, about eighty five percent of
the men you will meet will tell you they didn't
have a dad. If you talk to high school dropouts,
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about seventy percent of the high school dropouts you talk
to will say never had a dad. I mean, if
you're looking at the chaos in our culture and watching
what's going on in LA and other cities, here's what
it is. We can say all these socio economic differences
are that's not the issue. Go back and track every
one of those people and go back to their homes
and ask him what was your dad like? And I
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promise you it's not a Christian dad who was following
through on what Jesus wanted. And when you don't have
a society that has dads that are doing what Christ wants,
you have chaos. So as many things as need to
get fixed in our society, and there'll always be myriads
of things, the one thing that you can control as
a father is what you're gonna do in your own home.
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That you're gonna speak well of your kids, that you're
gonna showcase your kids, that you're gonna stand with your kids,
and that's ultra important. Amen. Now, when I was twenty eight,
I remember I got huh. I got the cassette tape
from that message. You remember what a cassette tape was.
I got a cassette tape so I could listen to
it in my car, and I was so moved by
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it because Bill said this. He said, if you've never
gotten a blessing from your dad, and I'm not saying
that your dad didn't love you or whatever, but if
your dad never sat you down, looked eyeball to eyeball
and told you why he was proud of you what
he could see you doing all these things, you just
need to ask for it. And my Dad, if you
knew my dad, I love my dad. My dad is
one of the most gentle, kind, loving men ever. I
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always knew I was loved. He told me I did
a good job all those things, but there never really
been a time that he had sat me down and said,
this is what I see in you, and this is
what you're good at, and I'm for you and all that,
And so I felt moved. So I wrote my dad
a letter, typed it up, send it to my dad,
send him the cassette tape. I said, Dad, I love you,
I know you love me. I'm not bitter, I'm not angry,
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but I heard this tape. I want you to listen
to it. And it would mean a lot to me
if you might consider giving me that blessing. And I
sent it. And after I sent it, you ever said
something to be like, why did I send that? It
was one of those. And about a month later, I
was back in Illinois. I was living in Dallas at
the time, and I went back home and my dad
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never said a word. I was there all week. My
Dad never said a word, And so I'm like, I'm
never bringing it up like again. And I remember the
day that I was getting ready to go back to
Dallas and I was about two hours away from going
to get on a plane, and I walked downstairs to
say goodbye to my parents and my dad was sitting there.
I had the cassette tape and he had the letter out.
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He said, I want to talk to you, and he
sat down and for about ten minutes just affirmed me
and told me what he saw me and said how
he'd seen it in me from the time I was
a little boy, and told me what I could be.
And at the time we had gone to some events
like promise keepers events and big events, and he said
to me, he's like Jeff. Every time I go to
one of those events and I see one of those guys,
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I think to myself, that's probably going to be you someday,
because I see you doing that thing. And both of
us were crying and we hugged, and it changed our relationship.
I already knew my dad loved me, he knew I
loved him, but hearing the blessing changed my life, which
is why I would say this, I don't care if
you're seventy five years old. If you can still get
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the blessing from your dad, get it. If you can't,
God will be the father to the fabulous. God will
speak those things over you. But I encourage you find
some older man in the church that can bless you
with his words, because there's something about getting that blessing
that changes everything. It changed me so much that when
my kids were growing up, even when they were really little,
Like I remember my youngest one, I take her out
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for donuts or something. She'd be like five, and I
would hold her hands and I'm like, you're beautiful, You're awesome,
You're great, You're so worthy, you're incredible. I'm so lucky
to be your dad, and all these things. And now
she's eighteen, I still go out and do the exact
same thing right and tell her all because I want
her to know. And I've been that way with my
son and my other door because it changes you. And
dads don't just say to yourself, oh, they know. I'm
(24:27):
sure they know. I go to all their events. They know.
They may know, but you need to tell them. Bill
Glass told the story about his sons that were like
six foot eight, and when he realized this. He remembers
talking to them in the kitchen and telling them what
he was blessed by for them. And these six foot
eight big men are like bawling right right. We all
have that itch on the inside, and Dad's you can
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alleviate that pain. Dads, you can set your kids on
a course that helps them get somewhere where they never
ever could have been. You call out their identity. So
here's what I would say as a father. A silent
father empowers a lying world. Your kids are hearing things
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all the time that aren't true about them, that aren't
true about society, that aren't true about their future. They're
looking to you saying, Dad, do you agree with all
these lies that I'm hearing? Dad? Am I ever going
to meet somebody that's a virgin when I grow up? Hey? Dad?
Am I ever going to be able to have a
good marriage? Hey? Dad, I'm looking at the world unravel
around us. Am I ever gonna be able to have
a family? Yeah? Of course you are, because you're God's
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and He blesses you, and he uses people just like
you in a hard generation. You're gonna have a blessed life. Yeah,
I'll tell you that. And I'll stand with you till
I see that. That's what a dad can do. And dads,
we need to stand up and use our prophetic voice
because our families need it like no time before. Our
silence is our surrender. So just declare God's truth over
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your family. You use your words and bless them. Don't
be afraid to avoid hard conversations. And here's why. Let
me tell you this that you're the spiritual thermostat in
your home, not a thermometer. It's not your job to
check and see are you really doing well? It's your
job to make sure that you're doing really well. Now,
I get this question all the time, Pastor Jeff on
(26:16):
Mother's Day? How come it is that you make it
so light and so great and everybody thinks it's awesome,
But on Father's Day you come and lay this weight
on us. First of all, I don't always preach to
moms and always preach to fathers on mothers and Fathers Day. Second,
is this because there's such a mantle of responsibility on
us as dads. It's just different. And listen, I'm not trying.
(26:39):
I'm not speaking to you from a place of perfection.
I haven't mastered this. I'm still in progress. I'm not perfect.
There's things I've said, things I've done, things I've thought
that I wish I could have back. But I'm growing
in my desire to be a good dad and a
good husband. Amen. And that's what we need to be
as dads. We need to aspire to that. And if
you're a young guy, you don't even know, like you
(27:02):
have no clue. Like I remember before we had kids, Like,
let me tell you something. When I was twenty, I
was the smartest person I'd ever met in my entire life. Okay,
like I knew everything. And before we had kids, I
was an expert on child rearing. I remember before my
firstborn was born. I remember telling Kim, who's really sweet
(27:23):
and kind, I remember telling her, Hey, listen, we get
this child home, she's gonna need to learn it's our house.
She's going to sleep in her room. She's gonna need
to learn to cry herself to sleep. We're not there
for her every need. We got to grow her up
until we got her home. And then I found a
basketdet and I put it on my side of the bed,
and I got down every hour to make sure she
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was breathing. Out of her nose and asking Kim, is
she gonna be okay? And all that everything changed. You
know what I'm talking about. Parents, you're dating, then you
see that family over there, kids are running around at
the restaurant, Like when we have kids, they're never gonna
do that, you know what I'm talking about. And then
you have kids and they're doing that. It's like, Hey,
this is the most peace we've had all week. Keep
eating off the floor, you know, right, This is what
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I'm talking about. That's why for us as dads, it
makes such a big difference if we understand the heart
of God and we love our children and we bless
our children. So in the world of lies, use your
prophetic voice. Secondly, let me tell you this. Your life
sets the tone. This is why we have to fight
for fathers, and fathers have to fight for the family.
You set the tone. So lead with a transformed heart.
(28:31):
You set the tone in your family. So you lead
with a transformed heart. Your wives will respond to your godliness,
Your kids will respond to your godliness. Notice what he
says in the Book of Malachi, chapter four and verse six,
and he's going to send a prophet. He says he
will restore the hearts of the fathers to their children
and the hearts of children to their fathers. So whose
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heart's getting restored first? The dad, Dads, your hearts have
to be restored before your children are going to respond
to you. You need to have Jesus in your life
and live Jesus ways for your kids to be able
to respond to you. If you live completely for Jesus
and you use Jesus's principles in your life, things will
go different for you. But he says the heart of
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the fathers must turn. Now. Statistics would tell us the
same thing. I don't know if you know this or not,
but if you're a family and there's nobody that's Christian
in your family, one of your children becomes a Christian,
there's a three point five percent chance that everybody else
in the family will become a Christian. If you're in
a non Christian family you come to church as a mom,
you get saved, there's a seventeen percent chance that the
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rest of your family will all come to christ. But
if you're a dad and you get saved out of
an unbelieving family, there's a ninety three percent chance that
all your family will be Christian right. This is why
I unapologetically target men, because men we carry a mantle
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of responsibility. And here's the reality. Women have no problem
with godly men.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
None who What woman wouldn't want a man that's fully
submitted to Jesus doing everything Jesus wants, helping elevate her,
helping elevate her kids, helping put aside his ways to elevate.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
Hers and the family. No woman will fight against that.
When I say men are leaders, what women fight against
is Yeah, I know a guy, he was my husband.
I know a guy he was my dad. I know
a guy he was my uncle and he didn't live
like Jesus and hurt me severely. And I would say,
not promoting that, that's sin, understand, But men, we need
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to have our hearts transformed by Jesus. And it's not
just a one time thing, it's an ongoing thing. Yes,
we repent and believe that Jesus is the Christ, were
brought into the family of God, and then for the
rest of our life God begins to show us ways
in which we can be more like Christ within our family.
Can I pause and say one other thing too, Guys,
the way you treat your wife will determine how your
(31:02):
kids think about Jesus. It will if you're harsh with her,
if you're mean to her, if you're cruel to her,
if you're absent from her. You can go to church
every single week and talk about how great Jesus is
and nobody's listening. How you treat their mother. That means this.
Sometimes it means that you won't do everything right, but
to the extent that your sin went out. I mean,
there's been times in our family where I've said something
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that's wrong. I knew it was wrong in the moment,
but I couldn't keep myself from saying it, and out
it came, and one of my kids or all three
of my kids were there. And in those situations, I
apologize to Kim in front of all of them because
I want them to know your dad was wrong and
the way I treat your mom was wrong. She hadn't
deserved that, And that's all on me. And I'm changing
and Jesus needs to change me. And I'm still growing,
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and I'm sorry, And will you forgive me for the
way I treated your mom? See, that's being a godly dad.
That's modeling for them what they're looking for. So when
young girls see a dad that's like that, then she
won't be dating some jamoke coming down the pipe because
she knows. She knows what a good dude looks like,
because I want somebody like my daddy, because I want
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to be treated like that in a marriage. And what
it does for young men is they see a man
and it's okay to show emotion and treat your wife
with kindness, and he'll start looking for a godly woman too,
like how you treat your wife as paramount to be
in a great great Dad. But then as we continue
to go, Proverbs four twenty three says, watch over your
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heart with all diligence, for from it flow the streams
of life, which means this God is going to take
you through seasons where there's different things in your life
where he wants you to grow in. And I made
a list of five things I think men need to
repent of on an ongoing basis. And the only reason
I can tell you authoritatively what these things are is
because I deal with them on just like you do.
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When I'm filled with the spirit, I act differently than
when I'm acting in my flesh. Man, can I give
you five things that you need to repent of. Number
one is this passivity. Passivity from our very first father,
act him in the garden who remained passive, rather than
bringing the word to his wife, rather than killing the serpent,
rather than asking the serpent to leave, rather than grabbing
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his wife and coming back to God, he stood there passively,
and passively means I'm waiting for someone else to lead
because I'm too scared to make a decision. Stop it,
repent of it. Passivity opens the door to chaos and confusion.
The Bible says in one Corinthians sixteen thirteen. Be on
the alert, stand firm in the faith. Act like men,
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be strong, Let all you do be done in love.
Passivity is the area of our life men, where we
see things going on in the world or at the
grocery store and that person's just being a goofball and
treating their kids bad, like that's not my thing. I'm
not going to do that. I'm not going to talk
to this and I'm not getting involved. That's somebody else's job.
That's passivity in our hearts. If every Christian man would
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stand up and speak truth in love when he sees
those things and makes all the difference in the world.
In a family, it's easy to be passive. Why guys
working all day, I'm super hard to come home now.
I got noise, I got kids issues, we got dinner,
we got this. It's chaos. It's like being at work. No. Stop.
Work is not your number one responsibility. Your family is.
Make that a priority first. If your family gets the
(34:12):
lion's share of your best who cares what work gets
like That's what the Bible would say. So reject passivity
because every part of your flesh is going to say, yeah,
I don't want to do that. It's not my job.
Not my job. My wife can do that. My wife
can take care of the kids, my wife can do
all this. No, it's your job. Number two. How about pride.
All of us are deal with it. Here's what pride is.
(34:34):
Stop pretending you have it all together. Just like I
told you, I was an expert on child wearing before
I had children. I was an expert on marriage before
I got married. You ever hear a single person talk
about what you should do in your marriage, even if
they're being biblical, it's somewhat laughable because until you're in it,
you don't understand it. And what we're saying when we
talk about pride is to be a good husband and
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a good father is not Okay, here's what the word says.
I know it. I had read Ephesians five for thirty years,
didn't understand it, and I'm still learning how it works
itself out. Getting rid of pride is being humble. If
scriptures say God opposes the problem but gives grace to
the humble. When you stand before the Lord and you're like, Lord,
I don't know how to be a great husband. This
one keeps failing for me. I don't know what it
means to be a great dad. Lord, How do I
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encourage him? How do I encourage her? What does that
look like? What do you want me to do? I
don't even know if I'm doing it right. Sometimes I
feel like I'm too harsh. Sometimes I feel like I'm
not harsh enough. Where's the balance? If you're humble enough
to ask God, God will lead you on the journey
for where you need to be. And by the way,
your kids don't need a perfect mom or dad. They
know you're not perfect. They're not asking you to be.
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They just want you to be growing in Christ. Let
me give you a third, if you can repent of
passivity and pride. How about this, guys, this is a
big one. Any secret sins. Now, all of us have
sinned and fall short of the glory of God, right
all of us, every single one of us. There's still
ongoing sin that happens that we have to confess and
repent of. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking
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about some secret sin in your life that you know
you always been there for a period of months, weeks,
or years, that you have no intention of letting go of.
It's your thing. It's not hurting anybody else. It's your poorn,
it's your anger at your addiction, it's your deceit, it's
your gambling. Here's what I'll tell you, get ruthless. Was
what you're hiding in the darkness. When you say, oh,
they'll never know, they'll never find out. Here's what I
tell you. On the authority of God's word numbers thirty
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two thirty three. Your sin will always find you out.
Your sin will always find you. I just tell my
kids when they were younger, well, I'll just never tell you.
I'm like, well, let's pray to God that he shows
me and I'm gonna win your sin. Always find you
can't keep your sin down anymore. And you keep a
beach ball under the water. I mean, at some point
in time it's coming up. And so here's what you
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repent of it. You repent to God first. You let
God lead you on a journey. You don't care. You
just want to get clean. You want to do it right.
Repentive secret sins. Repent to this people pleasing In comparison,
you weren't made to bow to the culture or fear
of other people's opinions when your kids say, well, so
and So's parents don't or that's not the way my
school does it. Okay, did you have a point right?
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I mean, you understand what I'm saying. You don't need
to bow to what everybody else is doing because at
the end of the day, men, let me tell you something,
You're going to be held to account. And I'm not
talking about ultimate judgment and hell, because that's only taken
care of by Jesus Christ on the cross. If you've
repented and believed He died for you in Rose, your
sins are forgiven. But there is accountability for how you
live before God. And one of the first things he's
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going to ask us, as married men, how did you
treat your wife? And how did you treat your kids?
Because I put you in charge of their future? Are
they better off because they met you? Are they better
off because of your investment? Or has it been really challenging?
I mean, that's what we're held accountable to, right, And
they'll give you a fifth one. It's bitterness and unforgiveness. Guys.
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I just got to tell you this. Every one of
us has been hurt by somebody in some way that's
been devastating every one of us. And those the hits
keep on coming, so to speak, don't they If you
can't get to a place where you can take those
to the cross, where you're not carrying your wounds around,
wounds are going to turn into weapons. And who's going
to be weaponized as your wife and your kids. You
have a bad day at work, you have a bad
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day over here, and you come home. You're not mad
at your wife, you're not mad at your kids, but
they get all the fullness of your assault because you
weren't able to forgive that person. Right. Don't let your
kids be targets of the enemy because you have unforgiveness
in your heart. Unforgiveness forms itself and hurt, bitterness, resentment, anger,
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all those different things you have that just bring all
those things to the cross and then go deal with
the people that hurt you rather than taking it out
on your family. Amen. And these are just five things.
I mean, I deal with all these things all the time.
I'm just telling you, guys, how I'm growing as a
Christian man. And my kids are here, they know I
love them, they'd love me. I'm trying my best to
do these things. But they would tell you I've been
(38:46):
so imperfect so many different times. I'm not standing up
here as an expert telling you I've mastered it. I'm
telling you I'm growing in it. Amen. And here's what
I would tell you, guys. If say we I don't
even know the Bible, I don't even know what to do,
then I would just tell you you be present physically, mentally, emotionally,
and spiritually. I mean physically means this be present. I
hear some guys tell me we get quality time on
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the weekends, we get quality time. There's no such thing
as quality time. There's time like be present, Like how
often as often as you can be when your kids
are little, be present, be down on the ground with them,
hug them, you know, love them, be at their games,
do the difference. Be present, don't be absent. Don't be absent.
Give everybody else the lion's share of your time. There
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was a time about six or seven years ago, I
realized as we were starting our church, you know, I
was meeting with too many people, and I was having
all these lunches. I'm like, I never do this with Kim.
I never do this with my kids. So I stopped
doing it. Like if I'm gonna go out, I'm gonna
go out with them. No. I still would go out sometimes,
but it's just not as regular because I want them
to have the lion sare. If I'm gonna go, do
something to do with my family right, because it's more important.
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And at the end of the day, I love being
your pastor. I want to get better being a pastor.
I want to work in my craft and being a preacher.
I want to do all that. But at the end
of my day, asked me, what do I care more
about this job or my wife and kids. It's them
times of infinity because I know at my funeral They're
the only ones that are going to care. That's it.
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And so at the end of my day, that's why
I'm pouring myself into That's why I'm giving my time
to and they know that. So be present physically, mentally,
be aware of what's going on. Just be aware of
what's going on. Who are your kids talking to? What
are they talking about? Well, they don't really talk to
me very much. We'll make them talk to you. Well,
they're on their phone all the time. Who they text in,
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what do their texts say? Well, you know that's none
of my business. Yeah, it is your business. You're paying
for the phone. You need to know who's talking to
them and what they're saying. And if your kids don't
like it, they can buy their own phone. You know
what I'm saying. You're responsible for their future. How about emotionally. Emotionally,
(40:54):
just be real. It's okay for your kids to see
you cry. It's okay for your kids to see you angry.
It's okay for yours to see you discussed it. It's
okay for your kids to see every part of you.
You do not need to be a stoic dad and
just pretend that you have it all together all the time,
because you don't. They need to see that a real
man deals with real things and sometimes you're happy and
sometimes you're sad, and sometimes this is going on, and
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they can be a part of your life, so they
know what authenticity looks like and that's okay, that's good
for them. And then finally, spiritually, here's what I would say,
just model Christ's likeness. I talk to a lot of
women that will tell me in the church sometimes I
wish my husband was a spiritual leader. I wish you
would do Bible studies. I wish you there's nowhere in
the Bible it says you have to do Bible studies
(41:36):
with your wife. Okay, that's not what you're looking for anyway.
Here's what you're looking for. You're looking for a guy
who is clearly growing in Christ, who's clearly being shaped
by Christ, who's clearly changing because of Christ, who's love
for you and for your kids is growing significantly because
of Christ. And if that is happening, that is a
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very very good thing. And even if you say I
don't even know what Christ's likeness is, I'm brand new
to this. Dads, do this. Just bring your family to
church every single Sunday. That's it. And when you go
on vacation, take them to church. Take them to a
different church on vacation. You know what they'll get the
idea Dad thinks church is pretty important. Every sunday we're there.
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You model that for them, and then they see it
because how you live is more important than everything that
you're just saying. So here's what I'm saying, dads, is
your heart truly turned towards Christ. That's it. This is
not heavy, like, oh, you're not doing it. It's just
the opposite. We are some of the best dads I've
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ever met that are in this church, Guys that are
really trying to do a good job. Guys that are
saying I want this and I want to be better,
and you're doing great, and I'm proud of you for
doing that. But we need dads to model this in
a way that's different. You know. In One Timothy chapter
five to eight, talking to the men, here's what it says.
It says, but if anyone does not prevent for his
(43:00):
own and especially those of his own household, he has
denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. Provide
there carries a financial bearing, like you provide for your family,
you protect your family. But it's more than that. It's
thinking ahead, it's caring for, it's planning in advance. It's forethought,
it's responsibility, it's intentional care. It's proactively thinking about what's
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going to meet the needs of my wife and kids.
And the Bible says, if you're not doing that, you're
worse than a non believer. Isn't that crazy? How you
treat your family is demonstrating how much you love God.
How much you preference your family demonstrates how much you
love God. And so the application is, am I allowing
Jesus to change my heart, to transform my heart so
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that in my family I can set the tone. Amen.
And then let me give you a third one. If
you're using your prophetic voice and God is transforming your heart,
then I would say this, the future depends upon you,
Dad's the future depends upon you. So God guard the
coming generation. Guard the coming generation. Notice what he says
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at the end of verse six and Malachi four. He
goes as he turns the hearts of the fathers to
the children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers.
So that what so that I will not come and
smite the land with a curse. What he links here
is the spiritual leadership of the fathers to the future
of the land. When dads, when we're doing our stuff
right and the generation is rising, it receives god blessing,
(44:27):
God's blessing and Dad's when we're not doing what we're
supposed to do, you see the results of what's going
on like that in our culture right now. And this
is why he says, Dad's the future is changed by
how you treat your kids. Let me just say it
this way, Dads, you should be the number one intercessor
for your family, meaning nobody should pray for your wife
and kids more than you pray for your wife and kids.
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Nobody should protect your wife and kids more than you
protect your wife and kids. What you're really doing is
you're preparing your kids to stand in the truth because
one day you're not going to be there. One day
they're either going to be out on their own or
you're gonna be dead and they're not going to be
able to call you. So line them up so that
they're ready to go, and don't just protect them physically,
guard their minds and their spirits, so they're walking in
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the ways of Jesus. See, Dad's your kids are looking
for those moments where you pour into them. Your kids
are looking for those moments where you know they're desperate
and they need a dad, because only dad can do
what Dad can do. I tell this story all the time.
When I was a sophomore in high school, I played
on our basketball team. I was either going to be
(45:30):
a starter or the sixth man, but I got hurt.
I couldn't really run. I stayed on the team I
shouldn't have been, but I really couldn't play very well,
and so I was more of a bench warmer that season.
But we had a game one time on a Friday night,
and our sophomore games preceded our varsity game, and our
varsity was playing to go on to the state and
it was it was packed, like there's a couple thousand
(45:51):
people in there in the small gym, and everybody's there.
And so at the end of our game, it was
full and we were blowing out the team we were playing.
And what the coaches do at the end of the
fourth quarter, why they do They start emptying the bench.
So I watched one of my friends go in, and
then I watched two of my friends go in, and
then I watched another friend go in. Now they had
replaced all those five, and now there's like three of
us sitting on the bench. Then he calls another guy.
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It's not me, calls another guy, it's not me. I'm
the only one on the bench that hasn't played at
this point in time, with like a minute ago. I
don't want to go in to make matters worse. All
my friends were up in the stands and they began
the schwartzy chant, put in schwartzea, you know all this stuff.
I was embarrassed, I was shame, I was horrible. As
(46:34):
soon as the buzzer went off, I got to the
locker room as fast as I could, took off my
basketball gear, put on my clothes, got out of there,
didn't shower, didn't do anything. And that's when I saw
my dad and he picked me up, and I was bawling.
As a sophomore in high school, and my dad said
to me, He's like, don't even worry about that. You
know you're hurt. Nobody knows, nobody even remember this day.
He goes, but you're a really gifted athlete. And you're good,
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and you're gonna have a lot of success before you graduate,
and and I believe in you and all those different things,
and it changed me. So two years later we went
to two state championships. Won it my senior year when undefeated.
My dad was at that game. He told me I
did a good job. But what Dad wouldn't go see
his son win a state championship? That was easy. What
I remember about my dad is when he was there
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my sophomore year when I felt like a loser. Dad's
your kids are always going through stuff. Some of them
may not feel like a big deal to you, but
they feel like a big deal to them where they
feel hurt and they feel wounded, and they feel like
I don't know if I can make it, and do
I really have what it takes? And does anybody believe
in me? Dad's your prophetic voice to them means everything.
Your transformed life to them means everything. The next generation
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depends upon what you do for them. And Dad's here's
what I would tell you. By the power of the
Holy Spirit, you're capable of all these things. There's none
of us that can walk out of here today with
a list of five new things I'm gonna work on.
I'm gonna get really really good at this. No you won't.
The message is this, God, there's some things that you
need to work on in me. There's some things that
need to change in me. So let me kind of
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wrap up here. If you're here today. For some of you,
this is a hard message because your dad was really harsh.
He was difficult, and I'm sorry that that was your experience.
But I want to tell you there's a god in
heaven that saw it all, and he loves you unconditionally,
and he will speak words of blessing over your life. Amen.
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I would tell you if you can get the blessing,
get it. If you can't, some of you may have
fathers that are already deceased, I get it. You can't
do that, that's fine. Find somebody else. Find somebody your age,
Find somebody a little bit older that's a man saying, hey,
I never got this from my dad. Do you see
anything in me? You know me pretty well? Would you
speak words of blessing? Because I feel like that hasn't
been there. Let me tell you something else. There's some
of you guys that are Dad's here. You're my age sixties, seventies, eighties,
(48:48):
and as you're hearing this message, here's what you're saying.
I blew it, and the enemy's lying to you like
you're no good, you're lousy. Look at how you messed up.
I want to tell you there's grace for today. Like
if you apply what you're hearing today, maybe it's that
you pick up the phone and you call your daughter,
or you call your son, or you call your a
strange wife and you say, I was in church today
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and I want to tell you something. I realized I
was wrong in what I did. I'm sorry for what
I did. Will you forgive me? And by the way,
let me tell you these things I see in you,
and you've always been really good at those things. If
you do that, you will free your son or daughter
or wife for the rest of their life. It's not
too late to do it, so don't think like, oh
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it's too much. You can change their generation, you can
change the next family. You can do this and so
we can start fresh with where we are. The Bible
does not take perfect people and say I only use
perfect people the Bible. The only people the Bible can
take are broken, messed up people, just like me and
you and start us on a journey and made the
journey for you. Start today. See, I'm teaching you about
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our Father because when you meet our Father in heaven,
when you hear our Father in heaven, Jesus Christ is
going to present you faultless before the throne of God
with exceedingly great joy, and you'll hear the words of
the Father, well done, good and faithful servant, just like
Jesus heard. It's no wonder that Jesus always snuck off
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to pray. Prayer was not a chore for Jesus. Do
you know why? Because every time he got in the
presence of the Father, Dad was saying to him, this
is my son, I love you. I'm so pleased. Way
to do it. Yet another great day today. I'm with
you tomorrow too. Hey, you're doing every So he wanted
to spend time with him. Most of us don't spend
time in prayer because we don't know. That's how the
Father's speaking over us. But I want to tell you something.
We serve a good good father. Amen. And even if
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you didn't have a good good father, you can have
a good good father through repentance and faith in Jesus Christ,
I want to tell you this, whatever you heard today,
I hope you go put into practice whatever the Lord
spoke to your heart, and that you're set free to
live more free for what the Lord's doing in you.
Would you stand with me our Father in heaven. We
give you praise, glory and honor for who you are. Lord.
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We bless you civically today for the fathers. Just want
to speak a word of blessing over all you, fathers.
May the Lord bless you and keep you. May the
Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious
son to you. May the Lord lift up his countenance
upon you and give you his peace. May you serve
your wives and your families well. May you all grow
in the knowledge and grace of Jesus and get better
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and better at it all the time, not by works
of your own, but because of what He's working through you. Lord,
we love you, We thank you for who you are.
We bless your holy name. You are so good. In Jesus' name,
we pray, Amen and Amen. Who you have got praise
for his word. You will be like God human unity.
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God was severed and through it all God's promise remain true.
Speaker 1 (51:47):
Follow me April and I would make you grains.
Speaker 2 (51:52):
This is the Chosen People. Listen to the Chosen people
at the chosen people dot com. That's the Chosen people
dot com.
Hereby perceive we the love of God, because He laid
down his life for us, and we ought to lay
down our lives for the brethren. One John three sixteen.
Dear God, we live in a world full of demands
and distractions. There will be moments when others will pull
me in different directions and my to do list is endless.
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Please remind me to be present in my faith when
these situations arise. Please help me to let go of
everything else going on and focus my heart and attention
toward You. May I always surrender to You in prayer,
no matter how overwhelming my day may be. Amen, thank
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you for listening to today's daily prayer for more inspiration
and an incredible message from our feature pastor. Stay tuned
to pray dot COM's Sunday service.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
A Happy Father's Day to all the fathers that are
here today. Special day. I'm going to dedicate the message
today to that. Also. I just want to add my
comments to High five week. So had nearly a thousand
students here, a thousand kids here this week. Also had
over five hundred volunteers, six hundred volunteers something like that,
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and it's a massive undertaking. I just want to say
from my heart tears, we have some of the greatest
volunteers anywhere in the world that serve at Brave Church.
We really do to serve in this camp. Some people
were up at six in the morning, leaving here at
four in the afternoon, doing it day after day. Some
people took off a week of work so they could
come serve, to see the eternal rewards that would happen.
(01:45):
And just to give you an indication. When we started
our church, very first service we had about we had
it not about. We had two hundred and eight people.
We counted everybody. We had two hundred and eight people.
Last year at High five we celebrated we had seventy
eight kids give their lives to Christ. This year. Listen, listen,
this year, not only we have kids give their lives
to Christ, we got to follow up with every kid
make sure they understood their decision. Every kid that made
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a decision, we gave them a Bible. Every kid that
got a Bible, we called their family let them know
what had taken place. Can I just tell you this
year we had two hundred and ninety four kids give
their lives to Jesus. Love me so again, Thank you,
Thank you so much for your prayers, thanks for all
that God is doing through you. I want to let
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you know our church has always stepped up when we've
had events, whether it be our Warrior Summit, whether it
be our women's events, whether it's been doing things at
band a Mere Speedway or different things. You're a church
that loves to serve and the lords Poleae so thank
you so much. With them, welcome all the campuses that
are here today. And without any further Ado, let me
pray and let's get into the word today. Would you
pray with me? Our Father in heaven, we give you
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all the glory, honor and praise for who you are.
And Lord, we ask you that during this message that
you would be helpful to us. We thank you, Father
for the gift of your son Jesus Christ, who died
for our sin and rose from the dead, and the
gift of your Holy Spirit who dwells each one of
us who believes. And Lord, we ask today as we
look in your word, that you'd be helpful to us
so that we could hear your voice, because we as
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a people believe that every time your word is faithfully
and accurately proclaimed, that you are speaking So our prayer
this morning is speak Lord, for we are ready to hear.
And so now for all those who have gathered who
desire to hear the Lord Jesus Christ, speak directly to
your heart. Who will believe what he tells you and
who will buy faith put into practice what he shows you?
Will you agree with me very loudly this morning by
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saying the word a men, Amen. I'm fond of saying,
so go the men, so goes the church, so goes
the church, so goes the world. If you want to
change the world, you have to change men's perspective that
they would align with the Lord Jesus Christ. Because when
men align with the Lord Jesus Christ, everything changes. And
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today I want to talk about why we should fight
for fathers and why fathers should fight for their family,
like why should should we do that? On Mother's Day,
I gave a message to all the mothers as to
why mothers matter, and it was really important because moms
are the fabric of a home and a fabric of
the next generation in society. But I also think it's
important that we address fathers. Now, when I say the
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word father, it usually has an emotion that comes with
it for some of us. We grew up in homes
with great dads. We love our dads. Some of us
wish our dad would have been a little bit better.
Others of us. When I say the word father, it's
a terrible, terrible thing in your heart because your dad
did not live a godly life in your home. And
you saw the ramifications of that. A couple things before
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I get started. If you don't have a good father,
here's what God promises. He will be a father to
the father less, and he's a good, good father. Amen.
The reason, however, we need to talk about fathers is
because Jesus was always talking about his father. If you
study the life of Jesus Christ, and you go through
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any of the Gospels and you read them, and he said,
what does Jesus care about the most? It's his father.
It's who he always wanted to spend time with. At
the age of twelve, when they were traveling from Jerusalem
back to Galilee, they couldn't find Jesus with him, so
Joseph and Mary had to go back and at the
age of twelve they found him in the temple and
when they said where were you, he said, did you
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not know I had to be in my father's house.
Throughout jesus ministry, he was always sneaking away to be
with his father, and Mark one thirty five says, very
early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus
got up and went to solitary places. Were there he prayed.
He was spending time with his father. The night before
he picked his twelve apostles out of all of his disciples,
he stayed up all night praying to his father. Before
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he walked on the water. What was he doing. He
was up on a mountain side praying to his father.
When he was in the garden of Gsemite, before he
was ready to go be crushed for the sins of
the world, he was praying to his father. Even on
the cross as he was getting crucified, he was saying, Father,
forgive them, for they know not what to do what
they did. And even when the disciples said, Lord teaches
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us to pray, how did he teach us to pray
our father? If you want to know who Jesus cared about,
it was his father. As a matter of fact, one incident,
actually a couple incidents. I believe it was two different
incidents in the life of Jesus was when we see
him do something that we think that doesn't sound very
Jesus like. And it was when he was in the
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temple and they had turned the temple into a place
to profit for themselves, and he took out a whip
and started driving people out and throwing tables over. Why
because my father's house, she'll be called the house of prayer.
But you've made it to Denna Robbers. Who was he protecting,
who was he spending time with, Who was he around
his father? And God designed fathers for the family, and
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they play an extraordinary, extraordinary role, an exceptional role in
the home for what God wants to get done. So
today I want to talk to you about why we
fight for fathers and why fathers should fight for their
family and to do that, we're going to be in
Malachi chapter four, the last two verses in the Old Testament,
Malachi chapter four, verses five and six. That's where we're
gonna spend our time. But I'll frame it for you
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because we're gonna look at that whole chapter six verses.
Just just set it up because in the book of Malachi,
what was going on the people of Israel, of the day.
Were not bringing God their best. They were kind of
bringing God their half baked ideas. They're kind of good stuff.
They weren't going all in on their tithes and their offerings.
They weren't going all in on their marriages. They were
not doing what God wanted them to do. And so
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he sent them the prophet Malachi to say, hey, this
is the way. Walk in this, do these things. And
then at the very end he writes these passages. And
this is the last thing you're gonna hear in your
Old Testament. Then there's four hundred years of silence before
we come to Jesus Christ. So these are the last
words of the Old Testament. So hear what the Lord says.
He says this, for behold, the day is coming burning
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like a furnace, and all the arrogant and evil doer
will be chaff. And the day that is coming will
set them ablaze, says the Lord of Hosts, so that
it will leave them neither root nor branch. But for
you who fear my name, the Son of Righteousness will
rise with healing in its wings, and you will go
forth and skip like calves from the stall. You will
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tread down the wicked, for they will be ashes under
the soles of your feet on the day which I'm preparing,
says the Lord of Oast. Remember the law of Moses,
my servant, even the statutes and ordinances which I commanded
him in Horeb and all Israel. So here's what he's saying.
He's saying, there's coming to day where I'm gonna judge everyone,
and those who are evil are going to experience the
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fullness of all my judgment. But for those who have righteousness,
it's gonna be one of the most glorious days. They're
going to be skipping like calves coming out of the stall,
and the wicked will be like ashes under their feet.
Then he tells them just remember all the law that
I gave to Moses. And then he settles in on
these two final verses, and here's what he says. Behold,
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I am going to send you Elijah, the Prophet, before
the coming of the g and terrible day of the Lord.
He will restore the hearts of the fathers to their children,
and the hearts of the children to their fathers, so
that I will not come and smite the land with
a curse. And here in those final two verses. I
want to talk about why we should fight for fathers
and why fathers should fight for their family. And today
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I'm going to give you three reasons why with an
application on each, so that you understand, as dads what
you must do. And here's why we must fight for
fathers and why fathers must fight for their family. And
it's this. It's because the world is lying to your family.
The world is lying to your family, so use your
prophetic voice. The world is lying to your family, so
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use your prophetic voice. Throughout history, God always sends profits
when things are out of a line in the culture
with what God wants to see done. And a prophetic
voice confronts the decline of the society and makes plain
and clear what the ways of the Lord should look like,
and that here's how you should walk in it. So
God says, I'm going to send you Elijah the Prophet
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before the coming of the Great and terrible Day of
the Lord. Now he also sent John the Baptist, who
the Bible says came in the spirit and power of Elijah.
But God is one day going to send Elijah before
the Great and terrible Day of the Lord. Because the
word promises that he will. Now here's what was going on.
Elijah the prophet in his day. You remember what was
going on. The nation was trying to decide whether we
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should worship the true God or should worship the bales.
And so God sent Elijah the prophet to make sure
that they knew that they were going the wrong way
and that they needed to go the right way. And
in One Kings, chapter eighteen, verse twenty one, you hear
what was going on. Elijah came near to the people
and said, how long will you hesitate between two opinions?
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If the Lord is God, follow him, but if bail
follow him. But the people did not answer him a word.
When prophets come, they bring a sense of urgency to
a situation. They say. The cultures saying this, it's all confusing.
Let me make it really, really clear to you what
God's saying, so you're not confused anymore, and then you
decide if you want to walk in God's way or not.
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As a pastor, one of my roles as a pastor
is to have a prophetic voice, so I can say
things to you that in this culture of confusion that
we live in, say, well, this is what God says,
and this is what his word says. So you don't
need to be confused about this anymore. If you want
to walk God's way, do that. John the Baptist was
raised up to do the very same thing, to prepare
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the way of the Lord. And so when he came,
we hear him say, repent for the Kingdom of Heaven
is at hand. In other words, get ready, the Messiah
is coming. That's what prophets do. Prophets prepare people because
one day they know every person that they're talking to
ultimately stands judgment before Almighty God. So I want to
prepare you for what that looks like. That's what a
prophet does. Dad's listen to me. You have a prophetic
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voice in your family. In the cultural confusion that your
family is in. You're the one that brings clarity to
this is what God says, say, this is how you
should walk, This is how you should do it. I'm
here to walk with you. Let's go do this together.
And Dad's that is your role to speak the truth
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to your family. Amen, and to speak it. Now, when
I talk about prophetic I'm not talking about coming up
with new ideas that nobody's ever heard I'm talking about
speaking the truth of God's word that most people don't
agree with. So I came up with a list of
ten that I say from this pulpit often, just to
give you an idea what prophetic looks like. Now, if
you hear these and you love the Lord, all ten
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of them, you'll be like, Amen, nobody's talking like this.
If you don't, some of them may hurt a little bit.
And if you don't know Jesus, all of these will
be an equal opportunity offender. Okay, so just listen to these.
These are just ten. I mean, I have scriptural support
for each one. We won't go in but number one.
In this world where we don't know whether evolution's true
or how the world got here, here's what the Bible teaches.
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God created the world out of nothing in six literal
days and rested on the seventh period. End of story.
That's prophetic truth. Like, you don't need to wonder about
how did we get here? You know? Okay? Number two,
God created male and female as the only two genders. Amen.
Everything contrary to that is a lie. What He decided
in utero is final. Even if you try to rebel
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against God's divine order. That's prophetic. It's true. The Word
teaches that marriage. Marriage is a covenant before God between
one man and one woman for life, and there is
no other form of marriage according to the Word of God.
That's prophetic. How about this one. There's only one race,
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the human race. That's it. There are no other races.
There's one race. It's the human race. And that's why
CRTDI BLM. All those that cause division are satanically inspired ideologies.
They're wrong one hundred percent of the time. Okay, people
are not saved by works. Your work's don't count when
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you get to heaven. If you try to tell God
you're good outweighed your bad, that doesn't matter. You are
only saved by grace through faith in Jesus Christ alone,
through his death on the cross and his resurrection from
the dead. How about this one. Serving the local church
and using your spiritual gifts is God's plan a for
reaching the world. If you're born again and if you
want to have an impact for Jesus, the lion's share
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of your gifts, the lion's share of your finances, the
lion's share of your time should go to a local
church where you are pushing the agenda of the Great Commission. Amen.
How about this one, Life begins at conception. Abortion is
always murder because taking an innocent life is always evil,
period true. I don't say that with venom in my heart.
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I say it with love in my heart. I say
it because I know there's a third of you women
here who have had them. And I want to tell
you on the authority of Jesus Christ, there is complete
forgiveness and healing. But it doesn't change the fact that
this is true. How about this one. God still has
a covenant plan for Israel. He blesses the nations that
bless them, and he judges those who don't. Just so
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you know in the news this week, where's brave stand
I and brave stand completely with the nation of Israel.
And then, because God has a plan for the nation
of Israel about number nine, Jesus is the only way
to the Father. All other past religions, books, ideologies all
lead to destruction. And then finally, I'll tell you this
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hell is real and without Jesus, people go there every
day for eternity. I mean that that's prophetic truth. Now,
if you're a believer, even if you're not clapping, and
you're like, oh, that's why I go to Brave. I
love this pastor, Jeff. You're not afraid to say anything
that's not true. What I am willing to do is
preach what God says. Amen. If you're not a believer
or you're not seizoned in the words, some of those
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things may come across as offensive. That's what the prophetic
word does. And Dad's in your home. Even when you're
telling truth from the Word of God doesn't mean that
it's always received and your kids are like, thank you, Dad,
I needed Sometimes it's a course correction for what needs
to happen. But your voice in your family likely means
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more than any other voice that your wife or your
kids will ever hear. Your voice carries weight. That's why
there some of you in here that are my age
or even older that wish that your dad would have
been a prophetic voice in your life, that wish your
dad would have spoken to you, that wish your dad
would have told you how much he loves you. And
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it's really interesting because in the scriptures there's two different accounts.
One is that the amount of transfiguration when Jesus transfigures
himself and is all beautiful, and Moses and Elijah show
up with Peter, James and John, and God Father speaks
to him audibly. And the other time is that the
baptism of Jesus, when Jesus came up out of the water,
God the Father spoke to him audibly so that everybody
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could hear. And that's the one I want to look
at today, because in Matthew, when Jus was baptized, starting
in verse sixteen, it says this. It says, after being baptized,
Jesus came up immediately from the water, and behold, the
heavens were opened, and he saw the Spirit of God
descending as a dove and lighting on him. So Jesus
is in the water, the Holy Spirit's in the shape
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of a dove coming down on him. And notice this,
and behold a voice out of the heavens said, this
is my beloved son, in whom I am well pleased.
Who's speaking them that's the Father. That's the Father, the
Father speaking over his son. Now you may wonder why
did he speak it out loud. He spoke it out
loud so the people there would hear, and that it
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could be in scripture, and that we would hear because
Jesus spent all his time with his dad. Why do
you think he was always sneaking away to be with
his dad, Because when he did, that's all he was hearing.
This is my beloved son, whom I love, and him
I am well pleased listen to him. I'm proud of him.
So what was God the Father saying about his son
that can be interesting for us and understandable for us
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as to how we need to speak to our kids.
Notice this, he says, my son, my son, you belong
to me. You have significance and value because your mind
it means this. Stand with your kids. Be proud of them.
Let them know that they belong to you. Let them
know by belonging to you, that they have significance in
this world, that they mean a lot to you. This
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is my son, he belongs to me like you. Better
take care of him. Right then, he says, whom I love. Fathers,
I want you to know this. Speak to your kids,
I mean, fathers. Let them hear their value and their
identity from you. Moms cannot bring the same level of
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value and identity as a father can. Dads, it is
your job to speak to your kids. About what they
are good at, and to call those things out of them.
That's your job as a father. Your job is to
bring their identity out, to bring their value. But if
your kids hear anything from you, it should be how
valuable they are, how unique they are, how special they are.
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You belong to me, and I see all this greatness
in you, and you pull it out and then notice
what else he says, in whom I am well pleased.
So you're not even gonna stand with your kids and
speak to your kids, but showcase your kids. Let them
know their significance, let them know how proud you are
of them, Let them know how grateful you are for them.
Like if you can call these things out in here,
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I mean, if Jesus, who's God in flesh, was hearing
this from his dad all the time, how much more
do we need to hear it? See every single one
of us and every single one of our kids, where
is an invisible sign saying please let me know I'm valuable,
Please let me know I'm important, Please let me know
I'm significant. Please let me know that you're proud of me. Dad,
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Would you please tell me and all of us have
an itch in our hearts. We can't scratch until our
dad gives it to us. And I didn't realize this,
so I was about twenty eight or twenty nine a
I heard a guy speaking in our church one time.
His name was Bill Glass, and Bill Glass played in
the NFL and he did prison ministry, and he was
talking about this verse and he said this. He said,
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a song's not a song until you sing it, and
a bell's not a bell till you ring it, and
a blessing is not a blessing until you speak it.
And he began to talk about fatherless families and the
challenge to fatherless family. I mean, think about this. If
you go into the prisons, about eighty five percent of
the men you will meet will tell you they didn't
have a dad. If you talk to high school dropouts,
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about seventy percent of the high school dropouts you talk
to will say never had a dad. I mean, if
you're looking at the chaos in our culture and watching
what's going on in LA and other cities, here's what
it is. We can say all these socio economic differences
are that's not the issue. Go back and track every
one of those people and go back to their homes
and ask him what was your dad like? And I
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promise you it's not a Christian dad who was following
through on what Jesus wanted. And when you don't have
a society that has dads that are doing what Christ wants,
you have chaos. So as many things as need to
get fixed in our society, and there'll always be myriads
of things, the one thing that you can control as
a father is what you're gonna do in your own home.
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That you're gonna speak well of your kids, that you're
gonna showcase your kids, that you're gonna stand with your kids,
and that's ultra important. Amen. Now, when I was twenty eight,
I remember I got huh. I got the cassette tape
from that message. You remember what a cassette tape was.
I got a cassette tape so I could listen to
it in my car, and I was so moved by
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it because Bill said this. He said, if you've never
gotten a blessing from your dad, and I'm not saying
that your dad didn't love you or whatever, but if
your dad never sat you down, looked eyeball to eyeball
and told you why he was proud of you what
he could see you doing all these things, you just
need to ask for it. And my Dad, if you
knew my dad, I love my dad. My dad is
one of the most gentle, kind, loving men ever. I
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always knew I was loved. He told me I did
a good job all those things, but there never really
been a time that he had sat me down and said,
this is what I see in you, and this is
what you're good at, and I'm for you and all that,
And so I felt moved. So I wrote my dad
a letter, typed it up, send it to my dad,
send him the cassette tape. I said, Dad, I love you,
I know you love me. I'm not bitter, I'm not angry,
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but I heard this tape. I want you to listen
to it. And it would mean a lot to me
if you might consider giving me that blessing. And I
sent it. And after I sent it, you ever said
something to be like, why did I send that? It
was one of those. And about a month later, I
was back in Illinois. I was living in Dallas at
the time, and I went back home and my dad
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never said a word. I was there all week. My
Dad never said a word, And so I'm like, I'm
never bringing it up like again. And I remember the
day that I was getting ready to go back to
Dallas and I was about two hours away from going
to get on a plane, and I walked downstairs to
say goodbye to my parents and my dad was sitting there.
I had the cassette tape and he had the letter out.
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He said, I want to talk to you, and he
sat down and for about ten minutes just affirmed me
and told me what he saw me and said how
he'd seen it in me from the time I was
a little boy, and told me what I could be.
And at the time we had gone to some events
like promise keepers events and big events, and he said
to me, he's like Jeff. Every time I go to
one of those events and I see one of those guys,
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I think to myself, that's probably going to be you someday,
because I see you doing that thing. And both of
us were crying and we hugged, and it changed our relationship.
I already knew my dad loved me, he knew I
loved him, but hearing the blessing changed my life, which
is why I would say this, I don't care if
you're seventy five years old. If you can still get
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the blessing from your dad, get it. If you can't,
God will be the father to the fabulous. God will
speak those things over you. But I encourage you find
some older man in the church that can bless you
with his words, because there's something about getting that blessing
that changes everything. It changed me so much that when
my kids were growing up, even when they were really little,
Like I remember my youngest one, I take her out
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for donuts or something. She'd be like five, and I
would hold her hands and I'm like, you're beautiful, You're awesome,
You're great, You're so worthy, you're incredible. I'm so lucky
to be your dad, and all these things. And now
she's eighteen, I still go out and do the exact
same thing right and tell her all because I want
her to know. And I've been that way with my
son and my other door because it changes you. And
dads don't just say to yourself, oh, they know. I'm
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sure they know. I go to all their events. They know.
They may know, but you need to tell them. Bill
Glass told the story about his sons that were like
six foot eight, and when he realized this. He remembers
talking to them in the kitchen and telling them what
he was blessed by for them. And these six foot
eight big men are like bawling right right. We all
have that itch on the inside, and Dad's you can
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alleviate that pain. Dads, you can set your kids on
a course that helps them get somewhere where they never
ever could have been. You call out their identity. So
here's what I would say as a father. A silent
father empowers a lying world. Your kids are hearing things
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all the time that aren't true about them, that aren't
true about society, that aren't true about their future. They're
looking to you saying, Dad, do you agree with all
these lies that I'm hearing? Dad? Am I ever going
to meet somebody that's a virgin when I grow up? Hey? Dad?
Am I ever going to be able to have a
good marriage? Hey? Dad, I'm looking at the world unravel
around us. Am I ever gonna be able to have
a family? Yeah? Of course you are, because you're God's
(25:30):
and He blesses you, and he uses people just like
you in a hard generation. You're gonna have a blessed life. Yeah,
I'll tell you that. And I'll stand with you till
I see that. That's what a dad can do. And dads,
we need to stand up and use our prophetic voice
because our families need it like no time before. Our
silence is our surrender. So just declare God's truth over
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your family. You use your words and bless them. Don't
be afraid to avoid hard conversations. And here's why. Let
me tell you this that you're the spiritual thermostat in
your home, not a thermometer. It's not your job to
check and see are you really doing well? It's your
job to make sure that you're doing really well. Now,
I get this question all the time, Pastor Jeff on
(26:16):
Mother's Day? How come it is that you make it
so light and so great and everybody thinks it's awesome,
But on Father's Day you come and lay this weight
on us. First of all, I don't always preach to
moms and always preach to fathers on mothers and Fathers Day. Second,
is this because there's such a mantle of responsibility on
us as dads. It's just different. And listen, I'm not trying.
(26:39):
I'm not speaking to you from a place of perfection.
I haven't mastered this. I'm still in progress. I'm not perfect.
There's things I've said, things I've done, things I've thought
that I wish I could have back. But I'm growing
in my desire to be a good dad and a
good husband. Amen. And that's what we need to be
as dads. We need to aspire to that. And if
you're a young guy, you don't even know, like you
(27:02):
have no clue. Like I remember before we had kids, Like,
let me tell you something. When I was twenty, I
was the smartest person I'd ever met in my entire life. Okay,
like I knew everything. And before we had kids, I
was an expert on child rearing. I remember before my
firstborn was born. I remember telling Kim, who's really sweet
(27:23):
and kind, I remember telling her, Hey, listen, we get
this child home, she's gonna need to learn it's our house.
She's going to sleep in her room. She's gonna need
to learn to cry herself to sleep. We're not there
for her every need. We got to grow her up
until we got her home. And then I found a
basketdet and I put it on my side of the bed,
and I got down every hour to make sure she
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was breathing. Out of her nose and asking Kim, is
she gonna be okay? And all that everything changed. You
know what I'm talking about. Parents, you're dating, then you
see that family over there, kids are running around at
the restaurant, Like when we have kids, they're never gonna
do that, you know what I'm talking about. And then
you have kids and they're doing that. It's like, Hey,
this is the most peace we've had all week. Keep
eating off the floor, you know, right, This is what
(28:08):
I'm talking about. That's why for us as dads, it
makes such a big difference if we understand the heart
of God and we love our children and we bless
our children. So in the world of lies, use your
prophetic voice. Secondly, let me tell you this. Your life
sets the tone. This is why we have to fight
for fathers, and fathers have to fight for the family.
You set the tone. So lead with a transformed heart.
(28:31):
You set the tone in your family. So you lead
with a transformed heart. Your wives will respond to your godliness,
Your kids will respond to your godliness. Notice what he
says in the Book of Malachi, chapter four and verse six,
and he's going to send a prophet. He says he
will restore the hearts of the fathers to their children
and the hearts of children to their fathers. So whose
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heart's getting restored first? The dad, Dads, your hearts have
to be restored before your children are going to respond
to you. You need to have Jesus in your life
and live Jesus ways for your kids to be able
to respond to you. If you live completely for Jesus
and you use Jesus's principles in your life, things will
go different for you. But he says the heart of
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the fathers must turn. Now. Statistics would tell us the
same thing. I don't know if you know this or not,
but if you're a family and there's nobody that's Christian
in your family, one of your children becomes a Christian,
there's a three point five percent chance that everybody else
in the family will become a Christian. If you're in
a non Christian family you come to church as a mom,
you get saved, there's a seventeen percent chance that the
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rest of your family will all come to christ. But
if you're a dad and you get saved out of
an unbelieving family, there's a ninety three percent chance that
all your family will be Christian right. This is why
I unapologetically target men, because men we carry a mantle
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of responsibility. And here's the reality. Women have no problem
with godly men.
Speaker 3 (30:04):
None who What woman wouldn't want a man that's fully
submitted to Jesus doing everything Jesus wants, helping elevate her,
helping elevate her kids, helping put aside his ways to elevate.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
Hers and the family. No woman will fight against that.
When I say men are leaders, what women fight against
is Yeah, I know a guy, he was my husband.
I know a guy he was my dad. I know
a guy he was my uncle and he didn't live
like Jesus and hurt me severely. And I would say,
not promoting that, that's sin, understand, But men, we need
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to have our hearts transformed by Jesus. And it's not
just a one time thing, it's an ongoing thing. Yes,
we repent and believe that Jesus is the Christ, were
brought into the family of God, and then for the
rest of our life God begins to show us ways
in which we can be more like Christ within our family.
Can I pause and say one other thing too, Guys,
the way you treat your wife will determine how your
(31:02):
kids think about Jesus. It will if you're harsh with her,
if you're mean to her, if you're cruel to her,
if you're absent from her. You can go to church
every single week and talk about how great Jesus is
and nobody's listening. How you treat their mother. That means this.
Sometimes it means that you won't do everything right, but
to the extent that your sin went out. I mean,
there's been times in our family where I've said something
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that's wrong. I knew it was wrong in the moment,
but I couldn't keep myself from saying it, and out
it came, and one of my kids or all three
of my kids were there. And in those situations, I
apologize to Kim in front of all of them because
I want them to know your dad was wrong and
the way I treat your mom was wrong. She hadn't
deserved that, And that's all on me. And I'm changing
and Jesus needs to change me. And I'm still growing,
(31:43):
and I'm sorry, And will you forgive me for the
way I treated your mom? See, that's being a godly dad.
That's modeling for them what they're looking for. So when
young girls see a dad that's like that, then she
won't be dating some jamoke coming down the pipe because
she knows. She knows what a good dude looks like,
because I want somebody like my daddy, because I want
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to be treated like that in a marriage. And what
it does for young men is they see a man
and it's okay to show emotion and treat your wife
with kindness, and he'll start looking for a godly woman too,
like how you treat your wife as paramount to be
in a great great Dad. But then as we continue
to go, Proverbs four twenty three says, watch over your
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heart with all diligence, for from it flow the streams
of life, which means this God is going to take
you through seasons where there's different things in your life
where he wants you to grow in. And I made
a list of five things I think men need to
repent of on an ongoing basis. And the only reason
I can tell you authoritatively what these things are is
because I deal with them on just like you do.
(32:47):
When I'm filled with the spirit, I act differently than
when I'm acting in my flesh. Man, can I give
you five things that you need to repent of. Number
one is this passivity. Passivity from our very first father,
act him in the garden who remained passive, rather than
bringing the word to his wife, rather than killing the serpent,
rather than asking the serpent to leave, rather than grabbing
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his wife and coming back to God, he stood there passively,
and passively means I'm waiting for someone else to lead
because I'm too scared to make a decision. Stop it,
repent of it. Passivity opens the door to chaos and confusion.
The Bible says in one Corinthians sixteen thirteen. Be on
the alert, stand firm in the faith. Act like men,
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be strong, Let all you do be done in love.
Passivity is the area of our life men, where we
see things going on in the world or at the
grocery store and that person's just being a goofball and
treating their kids bad, like that's not my thing. I'm
not going to do that. I'm not going to talk
to this and I'm not getting involved. That's somebody else's job.
That's passivity in our hearts. If every Christian man would
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stand up and speak truth in love when he sees
those things and makes all the difference in the world.
In a family, it's easy to be passive. Why guys
working all day, I'm super hard to come home now.
I got noise, I got kids issues, we got dinner,
we got this. It's chaos. It's like being at work. No. Stop.
Work is not your number one responsibility. Your family is.
Make that a priority first. If your family gets the
(34:12):
lion's share of your best who cares what work gets
like That's what the Bible would say. So reject passivity
because every part of your flesh is going to say, yeah,
I don't want to do that. It's not my job.
Not my job. My wife can do that. My wife
can take care of the kids, my wife can do
all this. No, it's your job. Number two. How about pride.
All of us are deal with it. Here's what pride is.
(34:34):
Stop pretending you have it all together. Just like I
told you, I was an expert on child wearing before
I had children. I was an expert on marriage before
I got married. You ever hear a single person talk
about what you should do in your marriage, even if
they're being biblical, it's somewhat laughable because until you're in it,
you don't understand it. And what we're saying when we
talk about pride is to be a good husband and
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a good father is not Okay, here's what the word says.
I know it. I had read Ephesians five for thirty years,
didn't understand it, and I'm still learning how it works
itself out. Getting rid of pride is being humble. If
scriptures say God opposes the problem but gives grace to
the humble. When you stand before the Lord and you're like, Lord,
I don't know how to be a great husband. This
one keeps failing for me. I don't know what it
means to be a great dad. Lord, How do I
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encourage him? How do I encourage her? What does that
look like? What do you want me to do? I
don't even know if I'm doing it right. Sometimes I
feel like I'm too harsh. Sometimes I feel like I'm
not harsh enough. Where's the balance? If you're humble enough
to ask God, God will lead you on the journey
for where you need to be. And by the way,
your kids don't need a perfect mom or dad. They
know you're not perfect. They're not asking you to be.
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They just want you to be growing in Christ. Let
me give you a third, if you can repent of
passivity and pride. How about this, guys, this is a
big one. Any secret sins. Now, all of us have
sinned and fall short of the glory of God, right
all of us, every single one of us. There's still
ongoing sin that happens that we have to confess and
repent of. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking
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about some secret sin in your life that you know
you always been there for a period of months, weeks,
or years, that you have no intention of letting go of.
It's your thing. It's not hurting anybody else. It's your poorn,
it's your anger at your addiction, it's your deceit, it's
your gambling. Here's what I'll tell you, get ruthless. Was
what you're hiding in the darkness. When you say, oh,
they'll never know, they'll never find out. Here's what I
tell you. On the authority of God's word numbers thirty
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two thirty three. Your sin will always find you out.
Your sin will always find you. I just tell my
kids when they were younger, well, I'll just never tell you.
I'm like, well, let's pray to God that he shows
me and I'm gonna win your sin. Always find you
can't keep your sin down anymore. And you keep a
beach ball under the water. I mean, at some point
in time it's coming up. And so here's what you
(36:40):
repent of it. You repent to God first. You let
God lead you on a journey. You don't care. You
just want to get clean. You want to do it right.
Repentive secret sins. Repent to this people pleasing In comparison,
you weren't made to bow to the culture or fear
of other people's opinions when your kids say, well, so
and So's parents don't or that's not the way my
school does it. Okay, did you have a point right?
(37:02):
I mean, you understand what I'm saying. You don't need
to bow to what everybody else is doing because at
the end of the day, men, let me tell you something,
You're going to be held to account. And I'm not
talking about ultimate judgment and hell, because that's only taken
care of by Jesus Christ on the cross. If you've
repented and believed He died for you in Rose, your
sins are forgiven. But there is accountability for how you
live before God. And one of the first things he's
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going to ask us, as married men, how did you
treat your wife? And how did you treat your kids?
Because I put you in charge of their future? Are
they better off because they met you? Are they better
off because of your investment? Or has it been really challenging?
I mean, that's what we're held accountable to, right, And
they'll give you a fifth one. It's bitterness and unforgiveness. Guys.
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I just got to tell you this. Every one of
us has been hurt by somebody in some way that's
been devastating every one of us. And those the hits
keep on coming, so to speak, don't they If you
can't get to a place where you can take those
to the cross, where you're not carrying your wounds around,
wounds are going to turn into weapons. And who's going
to be weaponized as your wife and your kids. You
have a bad day at work, you have a bad
(38:06):
day over here, and you come home. You're not mad
at your wife, you're not mad at your kids, but
they get all the fullness of your assault because you
weren't able to forgive that person. Right. Don't let your
kids be targets of the enemy because you have unforgiveness
in your heart. Unforgiveness forms itself and hurt, bitterness, resentment, anger,
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all those different things you have that just bring all
those things to the cross and then go deal with
the people that hurt you rather than taking it out
on your family. Amen. And these are just five things.
I mean, I deal with all these things all the time.
I'm just telling you, guys, how I'm growing as a
Christian man. And my kids are here, they know I
love them, they'd love me. I'm trying my best to
do these things. But they would tell you I've been
(38:46):
so imperfect so many different times. I'm not standing up
here as an expert telling you I've mastered it. I'm
telling you I'm growing in it. Amen. And here's what
I would tell you, guys. If say we I don't
even know the Bible, I don't even know what to do,
then I would just tell you you be present physically, mentally, emotionally,
and spiritually. I mean physically means this be present. I
hear some guys tell me we get quality time on
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the weekends, we get quality time. There's no such thing
as quality time. There's time like be present, Like how
often as often as you can be when your kids
are little, be present, be down on the ground with them,
hug them, you know, love them, be at their games,
do the difference. Be present, don't be absent. Don't be absent.
Give everybody else the lion's share of your time. There
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was a time about six or seven years ago, I
realized as we were starting our church, you know, I
was meeting with too many people, and I was having
all these lunches. I'm like, I never do this with Kim.
I never do this with my kids. So I stopped
doing it. Like if I'm gonna go out, I'm gonna
go out with them. No. I still would go out sometimes,
but it's just not as regular because I want them
to have the lion sare. If I'm gonna go, do
something to do with my family right, because it's more important.
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And at the end of the day, I love being
your pastor. I want to get better being a pastor.
I want to work in my craft and being a preacher.
I want to do all that. But at the end
of my day, asked me, what do I care more
about this job or my wife and kids. It's them
times of infinity because I know at my funeral They're
the only ones that are going to care. That's it.
(40:10):
And so at the end of my day, that's why
I'm pouring myself into That's why I'm giving my time
to and they know that. So be present physically, mentally,
be aware of what's going on. Just be aware of
what's going on. Who are your kids talking to? What
are they talking about? Well, they don't really talk to
me very much. We'll make them talk to you. Well,
they're on their phone all the time. Who they text in,
(40:32):
what do their texts say? Well, you know that's none
of my business. Yeah, it is your business. You're paying
for the phone. You need to know who's talking to
them and what they're saying. And if your kids don't
like it, they can buy their own phone. You know
what I'm saying. You're responsible for their future. How about emotionally. Emotionally,
(40:54):
just be real. It's okay for your kids to see
you cry. It's okay for your kids to see you angry.
It's okay for yours to see you discussed it. It's
okay for your kids to see every part of you.
You do not need to be a stoic dad and
just pretend that you have it all together all the time,
because you don't. They need to see that a real
man deals with real things and sometimes you're happy and
sometimes you're sad, and sometimes this is going on, and
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they can be a part of your life, so they
know what authenticity looks like and that's okay, that's good
for them. And then finally, spiritually, here's what I would say,
just model Christ's likeness. I talk to a lot of
women that will tell me in the church sometimes I
wish my husband was a spiritual leader. I wish you
would do Bible studies. I wish you there's nowhere in
the Bible it says you have to do Bible studies
(41:36):
with your wife. Okay, that's not what you're looking for anyway.
Here's what you're looking for. You're looking for a guy
who is clearly growing in Christ, who's clearly being shaped
by Christ, who's clearly changing because of Christ, who's love
for you and for your kids is growing significantly because
of Christ. And if that is happening, that is a
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very very good thing. And even if you say I
don't even know what Christ's likeness is, I'm brand new
to this. Dads, do this. Just bring your family to
church every single Sunday. That's it. And when you go
on vacation, take them to church. Take them to a
different church on vacation. You know what they'll get the
idea Dad thinks church is pretty important. Every sunday we're there.
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You model that for them, and then they see it
because how you live is more important than everything that
you're just saying. So here's what I'm saying, dads, is
your heart truly turned towards Christ. That's it. This is
not heavy, like, oh, you're not doing it. It's just
the opposite. We are some of the best dads I've
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ever met that are in this church, Guys that are
really trying to do a good job. Guys that are
saying I want this and I want to be better,
and you're doing great, and I'm proud of you for
doing that. But we need dads to model this in
a way that's different. You know. In One Timothy chapter
five to eight, talking to the men, here's what it says.
It says, but if anyone does not prevent for his
(43:00):
own and especially those of his own household, he has
denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. Provide
there carries a financial bearing, like you provide for your family,
you protect your family. But it's more than that. It's
thinking ahead, it's caring for, it's planning in advance. It's forethought,
it's responsibility, it's intentional care. It's proactively thinking about what's
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going to meet the needs of my wife and kids.
And the Bible says, if you're not doing that, you're
worse than a non believer. Isn't that crazy? How you
treat your family is demonstrating how much you love God.
How much you preference your family demonstrates how much you
love God. And so the application is, am I allowing
Jesus to change my heart, to transform my heart so
(43:45):
that in my family I can set the tone. Amen.
And then let me give you a third one. If
you're using your prophetic voice and God is transforming your heart,
then I would say this, the future depends upon you,
Dad's the future depends upon you. So God guard the
coming generation. Guard the coming generation. Notice what he says
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at the end of verse six and Malachi four. He
goes as he turns the hearts of the fathers to
the children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers.
So that what so that I will not come and
smite the land with a curse. What he links here
is the spiritual leadership of the fathers to the future
of the land. When dads, when we're doing our stuff
right and the generation is rising, it receives god blessing,
(44:27):
God's blessing and Dad's when we're not doing what we're
supposed to do, you see the results of what's going
on like that in our culture right now. And this
is why he says, Dad's the future is changed by
how you treat your kids. Let me just say it
this way, Dads, you should be the number one intercessor
for your family, meaning nobody should pray for your wife
and kids more than you pray for your wife and kids.
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Nobody should protect your wife and kids more than you
protect your wife and kids. What you're really doing is
you're preparing your kids to stand in the truth because
one day you're not going to be there. One day
they're either going to be out on their own or
you're gonna be dead and they're not going to be
able to call you. So line them up so that
they're ready to go, and don't just protect them physically,
guard their minds and their spirits, so they're walking in
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the ways of Jesus. See, Dad's your kids are looking
for those moments where you pour into them. Your kids
are looking for those moments where you know they're desperate
and they need a dad, because only dad can do
what Dad can do. I tell this story all the time.
When I was a sophomore in high school, I played
on our basketball team. I was either going to be
(45:30):
a starter or the sixth man, but I got hurt.
I couldn't really run. I stayed on the team I
shouldn't have been, but I really couldn't play very well,
and so I was more of a bench warmer that season.
But we had a game one time on a Friday night,
and our sophomore games preceded our varsity game, and our
varsity was playing to go on to the state and
it was it was packed, like there's a couple thousand
(45:51):
people in there in the small gym, and everybody's there.
And so at the end of our game, it was
full and we were blowing out the team we were playing.
And what the coaches do at the end of the
fourth quarter, why they do They start emptying the bench.
So I watched one of my friends go in, and
then I watched two of my friends go in, and
then I watched another friend go in. Now they had
replaced all those five, and now there's like three of
us sitting on the bench. Then he calls another guy.
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It's not me, calls another guy, it's not me. I'm
the only one on the bench that hasn't played at
this point in time, with like a minute ago. I
don't want to go in to make matters worse. All
my friends were up in the stands and they began
the schwartzy chant, put in schwartzea, you know all this stuff.
I was embarrassed, I was shame, I was horrible. As
(46:34):
soon as the buzzer went off, I got to the
locker room as fast as I could, took off my
basketball gear, put on my clothes, got out of there,
didn't shower, didn't do anything. And that's when I saw
my dad and he picked me up, and I was bawling.
As a sophomore in high school, and my dad said
to me, He's like, don't even worry about that. You
know you're hurt. Nobody knows, nobody even remember this day.
He goes, but you're a really gifted athlete. And you're good,
(46:55):
and you're gonna have a lot of success before you graduate,
and and I believe in you and all those different things,
and it changed me. So two years later we went
to two state championships. Won it my senior year when undefeated.
My dad was at that game. He told me I
did a good job. But what Dad wouldn't go see
his son win a state championship? That was easy. What
I remember about my dad is when he was there
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my sophomore year when I felt like a loser. Dad's
your kids are always going through stuff. Some of them
may not feel like a big deal to you, but
they feel like a big deal to them where they
feel hurt and they feel wounded, and they feel like
I don't know if I can make it, and do
I really have what it takes? And does anybody believe
in me? Dad's your prophetic voice to them means everything.
Your transformed life to them means everything. The next generation
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depends upon what you do for them. And Dad's here's
what I would tell you. By the power of the
Holy Spirit, you're capable of all these things. There's none
of us that can walk out of here today with
a list of five new things I'm gonna work on.
I'm gonna get really really good at this. No you won't.
The message is this, God, there's some things that you
need to work on in me. There's some things that
need to change in me. So let me kind of
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wrap up here. If you're here today. For some of you,
this is a hard message because your dad was really harsh.
He was difficult, and I'm sorry that that was your experience.
But I want to tell you there's a god in
heaven that saw it all, and he loves you unconditionally,
and he will speak words of blessing over your life. Amen.
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I would tell you if you can get the blessing,
get it. If you can't, some of you may have
fathers that are already deceased, I get it. You can't
do that, that's fine. Find somebody else. Find somebody your age,
Find somebody a little bit older that's a man saying, hey,
I never got this from my dad. Do you see
anything in me? You know me pretty well? Would you
speak words of blessing? Because I feel like that hasn't
been there. Let me tell you something else. There's some
of you guys that are Dad's here. You're my age sixties, seventies, eighties,
(48:48):
and as you're hearing this message, here's what you're saying.
I blew it, and the enemy's lying to you like
you're no good, you're lousy. Look at how you messed up.
I want to tell you there's grace for today. Like
if you apply what you're hearing today, maybe it's that
you pick up the phone and you call your daughter,
or you call your son, or you call your a
strange wife and you say, I was in church today
(49:08):
and I want to tell you something. I realized I
was wrong in what I did. I'm sorry for what
I did. Will you forgive me? And by the way,
let me tell you these things I see in you,
and you've always been really good at those things. If
you do that, you will free your son or daughter
or wife for the rest of their life. It's not
too late to do it, so don't think like, oh
(49:30):
it's too much. You can change their generation, you can
change the next family. You can do this and so
we can start fresh with where we are. The Bible
does not take perfect people and say I only use
perfect people the Bible. The only people the Bible can
take are broken, messed up people, just like me and
you and start us on a journey and made the
journey for you. Start today. See, I'm teaching you about
(49:52):
our Father because when you meet our Father in heaven,
when you hear our Father in heaven, Jesus Christ is
going to present you faultless before the throne of God
with exceedingly great joy, and you'll hear the words of
the Father, well done, good and faithful servant, just like
Jesus heard. It's no wonder that Jesus always snuck off
(50:14):
to pray. Prayer was not a chore for Jesus. Do
you know why? Because every time he got in the
presence of the Father, Dad was saying to him, this
is my son, I love you. I'm so pleased. Way
to do it. Yet another great day today. I'm with
you tomorrow too. Hey, you're doing every So he wanted
to spend time with him. Most of us don't spend
time in prayer because we don't know. That's how the
Father's speaking over us. But I want to tell you something.
We serve a good good father. Amen. And even if
(50:37):
you didn't have a good good father, you can have
a good good father through repentance and faith in Jesus Christ,
I want to tell you this, whatever you heard today,
I hope you go put into practice whatever the Lord
spoke to your heart, and that you're set free to
live more free for what the Lord's doing in you.
Would you stand with me our Father in heaven. We
give you praise, glory and honor for who you are. Lord.
(50:59):
We bless you civically today for the fathers. Just want
to speak a word of blessing over all you, fathers.
May the Lord bless you and keep you. May the
Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious
son to you. May the Lord lift up his countenance
upon you and give you his peace. May you serve
your wives and your families well. May you all grow
in the knowledge and grace of Jesus and get better
(51:19):
and better at it all the time, not by works
of your own, but because of what He's working through you. Lord,
we love you, We thank you for who you are.
We bless your holy name. You are so good. In Jesus' name,
we pray, Amen and Amen. Who you have got praise
for his word. You will be like God human unity.
(51:41):
God was severed and through it all God's promise remain true.
Speaker 1 (51:47):
Follow me April and I would make you grains.
Speaker 2 (51:52):
This is the Chosen People. Listen to the Chosen people
at the chosen people dot com. That's the Chosen people
dot com.
Host
Matthew Potter
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