December 2, 2025 • 62 mins
This week on Thanks Dad, Ego sat down with legendary stand up comedian, actress, and writer, Wanda Sykes. Other than their love of comedy, Ego and Wanda share what it was like growing up in the DMV – Delaware/Maryland/Virginia that is! Wanda also shares what it was like coming out late in life and raising twins. They joke about over-romanticizing going on tour, and Ego asks if Wanda, even with her decorated career, still bombs at any of her gigs? Finally, the two give a lucky listener some advice about hating your best friend’s partner!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:09):
Hi, guys, I may go out him. You know that,
or maybe you don't. Maybe this is your first time
tuning in. If it is welcome, I'm so glad you're here.
All I'm doing is running my mouth for an hour
or more, and somehow.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
People are interested in listening to that. God bless you all.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
Can I just say that this podcast is meant to connect, inspire,
maybe bring you a little joy. Also, my hope is
that we could just make the world a better place,
and so I have little silly ideas as to how
to do that.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
Right.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
So, today I've been thinking a lot about those people.
We all have those people in our lives who send
us memes and reels on Instagram and TikTok's just all
day long, and it's like you can't keep up. You
can't keep up. Even right now, I'm getting sweaty thinking
about it. I have friends whom I'm like, I know
there are unread messages in my Instagram account because I
(01:05):
just can't keep up with the memes and the reels.
I can't keep up, and it's like NonStop. It's like
has Ai taken over my friend? Or is my friend
really doing this? How are they keeping up? At this pace,
it seems near impossible, certainly impossible for me to watch
them all because it's not just one person for me,
it's multiple people. But I know everyone has at least one.
But imagine you have multiple friends doing that, how and
(01:28):
how stressful? And they go, did you watch the thing
I sent you? Did you watch that thing? Did you
see that thing?
Speaker 2 (01:32):
And I'm like, which one? Which one? You've sent? So many?
Speaker 1 (01:35):
My god, I'm sweating right now. I'm really sweating. You
can't see. I won't show you, but I'm kind of
sweating at the thought. Chill down my spine as well.
It's they go together, I guys, it's a lot. Think
about the way you are inundating.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
It's giving spam.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
Maybe you say to your friend, hey, friend, you're giving
spam because that's what it's giving. And it feels stressful.
And of course, there are worse things in the world. Guys,
there are always worse things in the world. I want
to be very clear that I am aware of that.
But boy, oh boy, getting an endless stream of reels
(02:15):
is so stressful because you want to engage with your friend.
I don't want my friends to feel like I'm ignoring them.
I want to be able to laugh and have shared
contact with them. But I'm like, how are you watching
all of these things and then also being productive in
your day? Because I can tell you right now, to
watch all the memes and reels you've sent me, I
would have to carve out time, meaningful time. This isn't
(02:37):
like a casual. I'm having to carve out real time.
It's too much and when they have it so some friends,
I used to double tap just to be like, Okay,
yeah I watched it, like to acknowledge receipt right and
hope that they thought that that meant I watched it.
And then I realized, oh no, I can't double tap
anymore because I'm encouraging them. That's positive affirmation. It's a
(02:59):
literal red heart, right, So I have chilled on even
clicking on them. And I'm like, I guess you're free
to send them to me, but I do not have
to watch, and I will watch at my leisure, and
my leisure damn near doesn't exist, So I will not watch,
I guess, is what I'm trying to say. But if
you tell me one's really really really really really good,
(03:20):
I will tap in. And if I tap in and
watch that one, and it's not really really really really good.
Like you promise, honey, you're dead. You can never. Your
word is not bond. Your word means nothing. And I
won't watch another one of your reels for some time.
I'll put you on ice for a little bit punishment
time out. I'm not watching anything you send me, so anyway,
(03:40):
I just know I actually maybe on the podcast one
day down the line, I'll like get to sit with
one of those people who sends memes and reels all
day and ask them all the questions I have for them,
and one of which being how do you have the
time to keep up with this? Because I know you're
not just sending them to me. Sometimes you can tell
someone sent them to multiple people, right, you can say
(04:04):
in a very diabolical way. Instagram allows you to select
multiple people and send separately. And sometimes that's very obvious
to me because every once in a while a person
sending them to me is someone I'm like, we've barely
ever had a conversation, but you're like sending memes and reels.
It's very interesting. I understand it to be a way
to connect, but I think we've gotten I think we've
gotten away from ourselves people.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
And I just want to reel us back. Oh you
see what I did there? I didn't mean to.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
No, And is it real us back in or rain
us back in? I don't know, honey, it's my podcast.
Tell me in the comments what I did wrong. I
know you will, and that's fine, and that's fine.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
Today.
Speaker 1 (04:45):
Something I'm gonna do very right though, is talk to
Wanda Sykes, the legend that she is.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
I'm so excited. So here we are. My next guest
is an absolute legend. Do you understand?
Speaker 1 (05:06):
Actress, writer, comedian, producer, coming up in the final season
of The Upshaws this year and going on tour with
the Please and Thank You tour across the country. I
just hit the mic.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
I'm hyping. I'm so excited. It's Wanda Sykes. Yay, thank you, Yes,
make some noise for what makes them real. Let's hear it.
Wanda Sykes in the building? Are you kidding me? Absolute legend?
One of my favorites.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
My assistant texting me this morning was I have a
great time with miss Wanda. She's absolutely one of my favorites.
And I feel like everyone says that about you.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
That's so sweet, but you would deserve it. You've been
working hard. I've been out here. I've been out here
a long time. How are you with compliments in general?
I'm I'm okay. I sometimes I you know, I will,
I will deflect it, go back to Okay, what's you
(06:03):
up to? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (06:04):
So if I was like I like your blouse, which
I do, how would you you just say thank you?
Speaker 2 (06:08):
Thank you? Okay? And we wouldn't tried to. I used to,
And sometime I have to go I didn't pick it out. Somebody,
somebody addressed me. See, it always.
Speaker 1 (06:17):
Comes like, yeah, it was just ten dollars that you
could get what I'm working on. Yeah, it's crazy. I'm
I'm working on also being like thank you and then
but I don't know. It's like where does the conversation
go from there? So then I feel responsible for making.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
It go somewhere else?
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Right, Anyway, I have to tell you you're a legend again.
I just just listen. I'm making you uncomfortable. I just
feel so honored to have you here.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
Thank you. Yeah, happy to be here. I'm so glad. Now,
wonder do you have anything anyone you want to say?
Thank you too? I want to say thank you because
I thought thanks, I should say thanks. Yeah, I want
to say thanks to you. And I thought about this first.
I was I was gonna say something funny because I
(07:05):
took a really good poop this morning. Can I ask
about it? Can I ask about it?
Speaker 1 (07:09):
We don't have the heart, but can I ask about it?
Was it the one where you didn't have to wipe after?
You know, when they come out clean? You guys know
what I'm talking about. You've never had one where you
don't have to wipe after to.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
Be sure that? That was amazing, right, it was amazing.
I'll just say it was amazing. You don't want to
get what I want to have details, but it was
just it just caught me off guard, like I didn't
know it was, oh oh wow, Like did you feel
lighter much? I know that. Yeah, So that's that was
my original. I thought about it, and I said, no,
(07:44):
I want to think, and don't you assholes cut this out?
What I'm about to really think? I'm gonna think my
chiefest staff Susan show. Okay, he is amazing. Uh, just
you know, just takes cap everything just from the smallest
detail to the I mean the largest thing. Hey, my
(08:07):
sixties birthday. Okay, I'll plan it for you, you know,
just anything and just she just does such a great
job and I'm just so just blessed to have her.
That's beautiful. Susan, chief of staff for ES Psychs. We
have to say thanks to you.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
I love to hear that because I imagine a person
in a position like you, and I am in some
stage of my career right now and can feel so
overwhelmed at times, and so to have someone like Susan,
like I already thought of it.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
Yes, it feels like a dream. That sounds like a
dream though. Yeah. They can look at you and go, okay, this,
she's overwhelmed, So let me do something extra. Let me
you know, I'm want to take this off and we'll
do that next week. That nice. Nice? Did you grow
up with that kind of care? Oh? Hell, okay, neither
did I. I just asked to be cute to be
(08:56):
hoa okay, all right, So it's it's nice to have
a Susan. What was growing up like for you? Growing up?
My dad was in the in the army military and
and uh my mom uh she was like worked at
a newspaper like the classified ass section. And but when
we moved, she stayed home and just got us settled
(09:20):
because we know we made that huge move from Virginia
to Maryland.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
But I'm from the yeah, Baltimore and yeah, but you
know what about the d m V. And I don't
know if this is controversial, Baltimore doesn't feel like they're
a part of it. I know they feel like it's
southern Maryland, DC and Virginia, right, And so people say
it to me there, I'm like, but Baltimore, Maryland's Baltimore,
Comma Maryland, right.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
But I'm like, but I also am a little bit
like that where.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
I'm like, oh, when you say DMV, you're not including
me and my people exactly.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
That's not right. It's not but it's not right because
we're a part of it. It's like they cut Maryland
off at like Silver Spring, Yes, exactly they do. That's
exactly where. That's exactly where, and it's like that's Baltimore,
like like open Marlboro, that's the MV. But Laurel MV. Laurel.
Let's name all the towns because I don't want to
show off exactly that's there. Do you have another one?
(10:14):
And out come on at Suitland, Suitland. But you know what,
I think, glenn Burnie is what blew it. And everybody's like, nah,
we don't want we don't want to. We're not claiming
Burnie because we don't claim glen Burney. Say nobody claims
glen Burney. Say my mom lived in Glenburnie three years ago.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
I didn't tell anybody. I said, yeah, just moved out
of Baltimore. They're like, where, and I was like, somewhere
from somewhere.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Yeah, it's like Dundalk, Oh, Dundalk. Oh my goodness.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
And my brother so I grew up with people who
grew up in Dundalk, Like so dun Dog wasn't far
from us, but me and my brother would joke a lot,
and this is messed up. I love you, Baltimore, Baltimore County.
I love all of these city, but my brother and
I used to joke me, like, you're from Dundalk.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
Neither of us were from Dundalk, but it was like
an insult.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
And then last season on SNL, somebody wrote a sketch
I'm at table read I'm not. I'm in the sketch,
but I didn't. I was not involved in the writing
of it. Someone from Maryland was though, but someone wrote
a sketch and in the sketch and it goes to
air there someone goes, oh, she's from Dundalk.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
And I was at table losing it.
Speaker 1 (11:13):
Yes, but everyone was laughing by the way, and I
was like, but you guys don't understand. That's really specific.
I love that, you know, Dundale. That was the whole
thing with me and my brother. You're from Dundalk.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
Okay, So yes, that is a big move though because
Baltimore to southern Maryland, we're not even the same state
in our minds, like they don't like us.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
I don't know if what about Baltimore County is that
considered DMVM from Baltimore County, but that should be dining,
you know, because it's Baltimore though it's not the county
when you out in the county. I'm from county when
you're out in the county, out in the county. So
that's that's the that's but it's still Baltimore.
Speaker 1 (11:56):
So my address growing up it was Baltimore, Common Maryland
two and two three. Then I won't say the number.
People can figure out the rest. But and also what
would that if I said it out loud.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
Oh that I didn't do.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
It wouldn't matter I should say it. I'm not going
to that, I refuse. But we feel separate from the
rest of Maryland. And for you to move from big
move from Maryland to Virginia, big leap when they're Virginia
to Maryland, Virginia to Maryland. Excuse me, what happened in
the family?
Speaker 2 (12:23):
Oh we were around white people. Oh yeah, so there's
more white people in Maryland. Well where we lived, I
mean in Virginia we lived, you know, it was just
around black people and then started so I saw white
people at school. And then we moved to Virginia, I
mean moved to Maryland. We lived in this neighborhood that
(12:46):
was just developing, and there was only one other black
family on our streets. So it was like, wow, it's
a lot of white Oh my god, how did it feel?
Speaker 1 (12:55):
And also what part of Maryland now that we're getting
very specific today, just remember.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
My dad was stationed at Fort me So we were
in Gambrels County. Okay, I know county. Never heard of Gambrelsah,
but I'm from Yeah, it's like Cton, Okay. Yeah, I
know that. Okay, so you saw white people and how
did that feel? It was? It was fine, okay, ended
up being all right, it's all right. Yeah. I mean
we didn't really think about about it too much, so
(13:21):
it was like just and I think that's how how
it works. It's like we get there and it's like, okay,
cool white people, and even go oh, but how would
they feel about us? Right, that's what it is. If
they're cool, cool, if there's no thrief, there's no brief.
And so they were cool. They were cool for like
(13:42):
one family. One family wasn't cool. They were straight up.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
Just oh they were yeah, and you hate to see it, frankly,
you do hate to see there's God, it feels like
in every one of those neighborhoods. We had one in
my neighborhood that I was in a new development to
in Baltimore County, and we had one in my neighborhood
who had.
Speaker 2 (13:58):
The Confederate flag.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
Oh wow, yeah, one of those, right, and so, but
always one gotta be one. It's gotta be one.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
It's not like you know, they're not around, they're still here.
The shadows.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
They're pretending to be the other kind and they're that
kind anyway, you follow, you do follow, Okay, so we do.
I think it's a Maryland girl thing, but again I'm not.
I'm technically you say I am Maryland, yes, because it's
I'm Baltimore County.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Okay. And this is a big review.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
This is very vulnerable for me to say from the
county publicly because there's a lot of people gonna disown
me today because it's the whole thing. I'm not from
Baltimore City. So then they go, then you're not from Baltimore,
but I am anyway.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
Which you're you're part of the DMV though, Okay, so
I'll be part of the family. Thank you. All Right,
it's official. I said it, and so it is. Wanda
psych said it, and that's law. Period. So growing up,
you go to Maryland, you're in Gambres. Your dad is around, yes,
and he is not necessarily the gentlest given military Because
(15:04):
when I was like, did you get that kind of
care growing up that Susan's giving, you were like, hell nah,
So what was it like the dynamic with you and
your parents? My dad was well, first of all, there
you know, the black people from Virginia grew up in
you know, Jim Crow South and all. So they there's
already a you know, a strictness or conservatism about them, right,
(15:29):
you know, church and all. So that part stayed. But
as far as the job, I don't. I don't. My
dad didn't bring the military home like he wanted us
to live off base. We didn't live on you know,
on base. So he was good about not, you know,
not playing military at home.
Speaker 1 (15:52):
Why do you think he wanted you to live off base.
Was it so that he there was a separation between
his vibe at work and his vibe at home.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
I think so, I think so, I think, you know,
maybe he also was like I'm not being military all day,
you know, four seven walking around whatever, you know. Yeah,
and also they got a housing allowance if you live
off base. And my parents are very smart when it
(16:19):
comes to you know, uh, finances, finance, so I think
he was like, oh, I can get a house with
this boom boom, you know. Smart.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Okay, so they did know the finance yecause I'll tell
you that that's another thing I didn't learn growing up,
anything about finances.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
They don't teach you that in school.
Speaker 1 (16:35):
And then then if you don't really learn that at home, right,
because in school they're teaching you like long division and
reading Ernest Hemingway, which is great. But then I'm like,
what about how to save my money and make it
work for me? So that's cool that you got that.
How many siblings do you have?
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Just want one older brother? Were you too close? Yeah? Okay, yes, right,
that's beautiful, and then your mom we can go forever
not you know, and then tapping do you have friends
like that who you liked without talking to each other?
And then it's like, right, yeah, have you had friends
who respond poorly to your absence for an extended period
(17:13):
of time? And then trying to drop back in, Oh,
you know what I mean? Yeah, I know what you mean.
I'm just trying to think. I don't No, that hasn't happened.
You are blessed is a highly favorite. I'm trying to think, No,
it hasn't happened. Wow, Yeah, that's incredible.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
I feel like so well, I feel like everyone I
everyone I know has at least one person who was
like they didn't do well with the life. I'm adulting.
Life happens. Yeah, we get busy, let's tap back in.
There's everyone has I feel like a tale of there
was that one person who didn't get it that like,
we're adults and we get busy and we'll tap back
(17:52):
in as soon as we're able because some people are cleaning.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
I love that you have lived a blessed the barb
being that long. I'm like, you are blessed. And your
dynamic with your mom is what, how would you describe
it or growing up? What was it like? Because my
mom and I we've always been pretty close. Yeah, it's that. Yeah,
(18:18):
we've always been We've always been pretty close. I mean
there was a moment when there was like, yeah, we
kind of had some issues and that and that all
had to do with you know, me coming out that
that was hard for them. So but yeah, we're cool. Now.
We found this thing. Now we both love to go
(18:39):
to the casino. Yeah, and I usually just when I
will go to the casino, I will play the table
games and my mom plays the slots. But so when
I go visit and we go to the casino, I
want to talk to her. We want to we wanted
so I started, let me say do this bullsh right right,
(19:00):
and now I'm hooked. You're hooked now too. It's contagious
I'm not do you do Vegas at all? Ever? Yes, see,
I don't like Vegas, and maybe if I gambled, I
would like Vegas. Oh yeah, that's the only thing. You
go to Vegas to gamble or if you just go
to see a show, great shows in Vegas. Yes, and eat.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
Yeah, the food is good in Vegas. I will give
it to them. I will give it to them for that.
The Vegas food, I'm like, they don't play like I
don't love breakfast, but the breakfast at the hotels is busty, crazy.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
It's so good. So when how old were you when
you came out?
Speaker 3 (19:39):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (19:39):
God, trying to take you way back, because I want
to know I was, oh, oh, I know it was.
It was right after the election when I was like
out out and that was what that was like till
two thousand and nine. I guess there was a two
thousand and nine November fifteenth, I want to say, now,
(20:03):
was that right at the Prop eight passing on Probert?
It was a national day of I don't even know
what day of the week it is today, so you
know it's eight. It was two thousand and eight.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Okay, so you were a grown woman, grown woman coming
out and then it created attention in a dynamic with
your mom, which makes sense. I understand how that it
had to be my forties.
Speaker 2 (20:25):
I was probably forty.
Speaker 1 (20:26):
Yeah, but like grown, making your own money, have a
name for yourself, celebrated by all of us, all of
our favorite and then coming out to your mom and
then it creates a dynamic. Was it a conversation that
was it like one conversation and then she was like
I don't understand and I don't accept.
Speaker 2 (20:44):
Yeah, it was like she like just fell apart, broke
a heart. And it was because I told her before.
You know, I probably told her maybe maybe four years before, okay,
and she, yeah, she just had a big just just
(21:04):
to break down and why, God, what did I do?
And I'm like, oh, really, you're gonna make this about you? Right,
maybe it's about you? Why is she bringing now you're
comforting her? What did Yeah? And I was like I can't.
I can't do this. I can't do right, I can't write.
So she could have been an actress almost, it's given.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
I would have watched that, like, God, I've had one
breakdown like that, and I I couldn't stop myself from
having it right And in real time. It's a crazy
story because I was freezing my eggs and they were
supposed to put They give you like a box of
(21:46):
just needles, and I'm not in syringes to prepare. You're
in charge, but you basically become a nurse, which I
think is kind of messed up. I think that's a
lot of responsibility for a person. So they send you
with all these things and you don't know what any
of it is because you're not a nurse. So you're like,
I don't know. They told me get five of this thing.
You go call this pharmacy to say fill this prescription
(22:09):
from this clinic, the fertility clinic or whatever. And they
gave me a box of stuff. I was like, presumably
all of the things are here, because I don't know
what any of it is. It's like reading foreign language.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
So on the last day, I've done everything diligently. I
even left a dinner party once to go give myself
my shot right at seven pm.
Speaker 2 (22:27):
I was like, I'll be back, gotta go give myself
a shot in.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
The belly, and so so diligent. And on the last
day where I went, you're supposed to do two shots
on the last day, right before they do the retrieval
the next day, and I go to and I was like, well,
thank god, I haven't had any moments because I know
I'm full of hormones and I've been told I could
get emotional. I'm like, I haven't gotten emotional. Well, I
(22:49):
go to look in the fridge on the last day
and it's ten forty five when I'm supposed to give
myself the shot PM.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
I opened.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
There's one shot in there. There's like one thing, and
they had given me multi to pull up the thing,
the one version, so I didn't notice that this other
injection was not in there.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
Wanda.
Speaker 1 (23:07):
I was like your mom that day, why god, I
think I just think. I called my sister and I
remember sliding down the wall and had this awareness like
you're doing too much, but I couldn't stop it. I
was like, you're being so dramatic, but I could not
get myself to stop.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
I was like, the other shot is missing. But again,
like your mother, I've made this about me and we're
gonna go back to you. Ok I enjoyed it.
Speaker 1 (23:45):
Was your brother, supportive of you always. Okay, okay. You
seem to have a lot of grace though, does that?
See MACI because you have to, you know, it's.
Speaker 3 (23:57):
You do.
Speaker 2 (23:57):
You have to give people grace exactly how you know
grace has been given to you. So I yeah, I
try to do that and that makes sense. Yeah, let people,
let people work through this stuff and you're patient that
Oh no, well I am. I am to an extent,
(24:18):
you know. Uh, but my patience isn't I want to
sit here and be patient with them. My patient is, girl,
I haint got time for that, right, That's that's my patience. Okay,
that's why I'm gonna let you deal with d I
got time I don't have, but I love it.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
It's boundaries though, and then people always kind of come around,
right they always do.
Speaker 2 (24:37):
That's really beautiful. Yeah, you have kids wander yes, okay,
how many twins? Twins? Sixteen year olds old? Are they driving? Yeah?
They just got their learners permit and my daughter's driving.
Uh and but my son he's off doing other stuff
right now. He doesn't worry about driving. He's not worried
about driving.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
I always find that so interesting because when I was
in Maryland, is fifteen and nine months you could get
your perm, you remember, Okay, I at fifteen and nine months,
like Mayday's March tenth, April tenth.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
I was there, Yeah, is that correct? Fifteen and nine months.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
I'm doing math wrong. But anyway, point is fifteen and
nine months. I was like, I'm off, I'm getting my
I'm getting my permit today. I wanted I wanted to
drive so badly. I wanted the independence. I wanted to
be able to skirt myself around. And so anytime I
meet someone grown, I know so many grown people, especially
because I live in New York. You're like, I've never
driven a card and I don't have interest.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Isn't that crazy? It's crazy to me. It's crazy to me.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
Some of them have moved here, even to LA and
they're like, I just I don't I'm not interested in
learning how to drive. And I'm like, that's all I
ever wanted was to drive. So your son is like that,
He's like, I'm not dripping.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Yeah. Also, he's going to school in France right now.
Oh yeah, So he's like, when I get back here.
Speaker 1 (25:53):
Okay, do you think he'll be I feel like he's
going to come back here and be like I don't care.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
Yeah, You're like, I'm not doing or not doing it.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
Yeah, So as being a parent made you more patient
than you maybe were before you had kids, I.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Think so, yes, yeah, I think so in what way
is it more patient? Or I think it's being a
parent you have have to put in your mind that, uh,
you're not the most important thing. You're you know, like whatever,
(26:30):
Oh yeah that's might might be what you want, but
it's not happening and you just have to put yourself
on the back burner for a minute. Yeah. Yeah, so
it's not patience, it's just okay.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
It's almost like surrender in a sense, like surrender and
be like yeah, because I think about parenting, it's good that.
I mean, if you could learn surrender and if I
could learn surrender in other ways in my life, things
would just be better all around. But I'm like you,
as an individual without kids, I'm like, yeah, everything is
kind of in my world kind of when I would
(27:02):
like to do the thing contingent upon other people occasionally,
right right, But I'm like, everything's like when I would
like to do the thing how I would like to
do the thing in my space, and when you think
about being responsible for another I have a dog, and
even that has made me.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
So sweet Angelo. His name is Chief he is. Do
you have any dogs I had? I had? Yeah, I
had a dog, Riley. He was almost eighteen years. Still
miss him. He's been going with four years. And then
we had a a Chihuahua, Simon, and just back in
August had to say goodbye to him. I'm sorry, I'm
(27:37):
so he was almost nineteen.
Speaker 1 (27:38):
Oh wow, you spend a long time with them. I
mean when I first got my puppy, because I got
his puppy, I was like, I, yes, everything right now
is not about me, and I'm kind of having to
change my schedule because I've raised that little dog. Yeah,
but I'm like, this is a good practice for me
a person who wants children. I'm like to go, I
have to keep you in mind. And some things like
(27:59):
him having diarrhea or vomiting at the most inconvenient times,
and I'm like, this is right now what I was
about to go do drop back burner to attend to you.
I do think it sounds silly, but I'm like, I
do really think it's kind of practice.
Speaker 2 (28:13):
No, You're absolutely right. I thought that with with Riley.
Why when I met my wife, I had Riley, and
uh I don't think if I had if I hadn't
had right Riley, I wouldn't have been in any shape too. Okay, Yeah,
they have this relationship and kids and all that. It's
(28:37):
crazy how that I've been out here in these streets.
If I had Riley made me go home.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Really also want there is nothing outside nothing nothing, And
I know that you know that now, but for other
people who are back, but back.
Speaker 2 (28:56):
Then, was there stuff outside? Back then, there was a
lot out I wish I would been grown up back then.
Tell me about it. What was outside it was?
Speaker 1 (29:05):
Wait, tell me our spots and all. There's nothing now.
You want to be at home with your Yeah, and
I similarly right, and I'm and I don't have the
partner and the kids. But I'm like, just let me
be at the house with my dog. When I got him,
though at first, I was like, this is a huge
responsibility that I feel like people won't speak about enough.
(29:26):
Getting a puppy. Did you have Riley as a puppy? Yes, yeah,
that is a lot of responsibility because everyone's like, here's
my cute dog, here's a picture of my dog.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
I'm walking my dog. That's nice.
Speaker 1 (29:36):
But then the reality of it is like waking up
every three hours because this little animal that is either
gonna pooh and pee all over your home needs to
go or you're gonna let them do it on your
run again for the hundredth time. I just remember being like,
what have I done?
Speaker 2 (29:50):
I might need to give him back.
Speaker 1 (29:52):
I mean, that's the truth. And since he's a dog,
he'll never know that I thought that. But I'm just
confessing here, and I'd have friends who have.
Speaker 2 (29:58):
Had to give dogs back. They're like, I didn't realize
it would be this much of a responsibility. That's funny
because I felt that when we brought the twins home
really because in the hospital it was it was good.
And then we got home and they were both napping
and I'm like looking at at Alex and we were like, oh,
(30:19):
this is cool. We got this. Then you know, they
they went on. They were cool and it was time
to go to bed. So as we put them in
the bed, we laid down and was like a I
was like, oh, I got this and the other one
so and then it came like both of them back
and forth, back and forth like this one no no,
no way, no no change, this one feet this will
(30:39):
And I really said, we might have to take one back,
because yeah, I said, we not one. It's a lot.
Speaker 1 (30:49):
I mean they say like twins having twins in generational
two as well in genetics or something like that, and
I think my generation in my family is due for twins.
And I'm scared because I would I would be too
scared to have twins because exactly what you're describing. I
feel like my head would be spinning.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
And that's what it was. You're like, we might have
to take one back. Yeah, we were lucky because the
telling all her business, because you don't have to say
the name. Yeah, because my wife was like, oh, we
can put we should put The doctor said that there's
three good eggs, so we should put maybe put the
three back. I said no, no, no, two was tops top.
(31:30):
He said, if we put two, we get one, we're winning. Yeah.
See we put two, Yeah, get two, okay, but we'll
do it. We got it, so glad you did. But
if we get three, one staying here, like one one
staying here, say that right now, I'm going to pray
for one of them to eat one. If we're not
(31:53):
doing this, we're not doing three.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
But then you wouldn't even want to keep the baby
that ate the other baby, because you're like, that's a
different kind of baby, that's a different had a child
gonna grow up to be something something else.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
I'm gonna gwup to be such true, I know that's twins. Twins.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
God bless all the parents out there raising twins or
triplets or more.
Speaker 2 (32:10):
I'm like, just nowadays, just raising kids. It's a lot.
My mom is one of nine. Damn, God damn, that's
what I say. I'm like, how but there's really one
of the sets of kids. It's nine.
Speaker 1 (32:25):
Three are a set of triplets. So like, technically gave birth.
I'm gonna be bad at math right now, three or
six times something like that. Oh yeah, it's crazy, it's crazy.
Or seven times. Anyway, how many siblings do each your
parents have?
Speaker 2 (32:40):
Roughly if you got I think both of them, somewhere
between seven and nine.
Speaker 1 (32:48):
Yeah, And that was so normal, and now it's like
and I used to think because I'm one of four,
and for whatever reason, when I was a kid, I'm like,
I want four kids because I was one of four.
And now each year of life I go one less,
one less. For a few years, I'm like, actually, one
would be that's great.
Speaker 2 (33:03):
Yeah, yeah, it's maybe a time shared exactly. We don't
need to do all of that. We don't need to
do all of that. So what do you How would
you describe this phase of your life? Though I'm in
a good space and it's trying to just fare out
what's the what's the next thing? I guess more of
a challenge, I think, or it's more of the of
(33:29):
creating projects. Okay, I think yeah, instead of it's always well,
I shouldn't say always, because we just did the upshaws
and I created that, but it's you know, it's always
getting hired for different projects, which I'm grateful for. But
(33:50):
I think I want to, yeah, create some stuff now.
Speaker 1 (33:53):
Yeah, that's when you say a challenge, is it because
that's not something you've done as regularly as you would
like to.
Speaker 2 (34:00):
But I think it's because of the of the type
of project I'm trying to think of, you know, it's
more that.
Speaker 1 (34:08):
Yeah, and in the midst of that, what made you
want to go on tour? Obviously you have more jokes
to tell, more to say to us.
Speaker 2 (34:13):
And is that that was it? Or is it? Is
there any other reason that you'd be like I would
want to go. I love doing stand up. I love
you know, touring, well, I should say I love torn,
but I loved sounds. Really it's hard. It sounds lovely
until you're doing it. But it's not like I'm standing,
you know, like a cheap motel. You know, it's like, okay,
(34:38):
you know, it's nice, it's nice. Travel first, it's not.
It's nice, but it's still it's just getting up and yes,
but staying like one night in a place.
Speaker 1 (34:48):
I don't know if you have multiple nights and multiples
uh one night, yeah, but like one night, take off
the next day in time for check off, check out,
in order to getxity. It's a little bit of a grind,
it is. And it's not to complain because how blessed
are we to get to do what we do. But
it's such an interesting thing when I've romanticized being on
the road and getting to see every little city, and
(35:08):
I've gone on tours with podcasts I've done, I've done
shows myself, and I'm like.
Speaker 2 (35:14):
This is a grind.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
Yeah truly, Because you say, yeah, I've been to Portland,
but I haven't really been to Portland. I did a
show at Portland, like people be like, how was it?
Speaker 2 (35:23):
I don't know. I got in and out unfortunately exactly.
But so you're you're enjoying though, you enjoyed not necessarily
being on the road, but live performing. Of course I do. Yeah,
I still love that. Yeah, that's beautiful. Do either of
your kids want to be in the business? Not yet?
All right? Not yet? How would you respond should they Yeah? Yeah,
(35:44):
if they want to do it, you know, i'd be supportive.
I mean, I wouldn't help them, but i'd supportive. You're
not gonna let them take advantage of a little nepotism, no, no, see,
I think it's great.
Speaker 1 (35:55):
I'm gonna have nepo babies. I'm like, I can not
wait to have an epple baby. You're so when you
you're really not gonna help them like not and of course,
like as a parent would, but you're not gonna be like, hey,
get them in there and do If they were like
I want.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
To do this, they got to figure it out. Well,
they have to have the talent. Yeah, I can't help
them with that. Hopefully some of it passed the talent.
I'm just like, yeah, are you really honest with your kids?
In general? Uh? In general? Yes, in general, but I'm
(36:36):
not Yeah, I don't. I don't. I don't lie to them,
but I'm not gonna I don't. I'm not gonna try
to crush them. I'm always lift them up.
Speaker 1 (36:45):
Are there any ways that you approach parentsing that are
unlike the ways parents you were parented? So where you're like,
I'm trying to do something different here than my parents had.
Speaker 2 (36:57):
Uh, try to listen? Okay, yeah, I do listen to them,
and I allow them to. Let's let's discuss this, and
you can ask me why I said no. Like growing up,
it was because I said.
Speaker 1 (37:12):
So it which is yeah, it was. I mean, who
knows what way is this? I would say this new
era of parenting that has emerged and in the recent
years will be messed up. But I'm like, this is
so much more lovely. And I'm like, I wish somebody
had asked me, let me have a conversation with them.
But I know it's like nobody wants to be talking
(37:32):
to a little kid. But I'm actually kids have something
to say sometimes they do, yeah, and so giving them
that space, I do agree. I mean, I don't have
kids is important, but I also imagine that at times
It is a test of patience too. It is yes, yeah,
and you approach it with yes. I mean, we're not
going to have a full on you know, you know
(37:54):
what I'm saying. I'm gonna let you get a few questions.
Speaker 2 (37:56):
Off and then that's that's it. That's it.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:01):
I mean everything always leads to because I said so yeah,
well okay, but I first.
Speaker 1 (38:07):
Make you feel like it's not just because I said
but we both know it's because I said so yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:14):
I respect. I don't know. I'm just getting the feeling yeah,
and they're like what, I don't know. I just don't
feel like you should.
Speaker 1 (38:21):
Go yeah oh to parties like that. But also a
parent's intuition though, Yeah, that I'm older, I can have.
I have immense respect for it now because before growing up,
like certain, my mom at times would be like, you're
never sleeping over those people's house again. I'd be like why,
But now I understand. She's like when I want to
drop you off strange folks. Yes, she's still let me
(38:42):
spend the night, though, She's like, I'm willing to gamble,
but not again.
Speaker 2 (38:46):
After this she was probably yeah the whole time, right,
But I'm like the parent's intuition is real. It's real.
I was in college and and we were living in
this house. It was on campus, but you know, all
these roommates. It's like four of us, and we were
getting ready to go to this party. You want to
(39:09):
go leave Hampton and go over to Norfolk to this party.
We were all getting dressed, you know whatever, and Tracy
got a phone call, so she goes pay phone, yo,
Tracy's mom. So Tracey's on the phone with her mom
and she's like, uh huh uh huh okay, yeah, all right.
So she comes back upstairs. She goes, guys, we can't go,
(39:31):
and we were like what. She's like, I just talked
to my mom, and you know, she said, asked what
we were doing. I told we were going out, and
she said she felt something and that we shouldn't go.
And we were like, damn, why did she take that call? Yeah? Yeah,
and we didn't go. You didn't go cause we didn't.
Did we find out that anything happened at no. I
(39:53):
was like, somebody better get shot in Norfolk tonight. I
said it better if we wake up tomorrow morning and
nobody I got showed. I need to talk to your
mom Tracy's out the friend Yeah, out of the friend group.
That's a mess, But it's true though. It's it's it's interesting,
like I.
Speaker 1 (40:12):
Missed a flight recently, and I like to tell myself that.
I'm like, it's because I wasn't supposed to be on
that plane. I was supposed to be on that plane.
Nothing happened on that plane. Girl, you missed your flight,
and doesn't it doesn't have to be that.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
But you know what, it might not have been the flight.
It could have been when you landed at that time,
getting in the car, going to that place, something could
have happened. That is so true. It's true. Are you
a person who believes everything happens for a reason? Yes,
that's true. Yeah I do.
Speaker 1 (40:41):
Have you ever heard people say like, in that reason,
sometimes it's because you're being dumb. I've heard that I
believe everything happens for a reason.
Speaker 2 (40:51):
Yeah, silly to think, no people, Yeah, I've heard people
say that. Yeah. Yeah, I believe I am where I'm
supposed to be. Right. Do you raise your kids with
any sort of faith? You know what? That's the area
that I feel like I'm not gonna say failing at,
but where I need to step up. But there's sixteen now,
(41:13):
so I don't let but I've always, you know, had
we say grace before you know, we eat, and they
see that I go to you know, either go to
church or online church or online church from the company
or bed, praise the Lord from this best. You know
(41:37):
you can order like the little communion. You can't stop it. Yes, yes,
oh you're you can get a little the little thing
and you just right there. Wait a minute, you're serious.
Don't tell me this. Why would you tell me this
because I'm trying to physically, I'm trying to get back
into physically going. Oh, well, you know, definitely, But I'm
the same.
Speaker 1 (41:58):
Good communion from bed and bed is my I have
established here that bed is my favorite place to be
at all times.
Speaker 2 (42:05):
Don't tell me I'm doing communion from bred in the
name of the file son. Wow, okay, it's over. I'm
not stepping foot in another yet. Communion from bed, blessing myself.
Oh wait, okay, so you do all night, but you
don't make that watch with you. No, I don't. I don't.
Here's the thing. Tell me, because you know, my my
(42:29):
church is black. So so I'm like, oh, passala slip
up say slept to day crazy, here's a white So
it's like up, you know, yeah, Wanda, you know what,
(42:50):
But listen, I do get it because everyone, which I
want to say, which he never does, my church is
very loving cour and he's yeah, this is the best
that just in case that one off, get that fear
that maybe this is the one day you make them
sit for church. It's gonna be the days you don't
like what, Yeah, we don't like white people in this house,
(43:10):
pastor what the pastor? We hate to see it because
that would really turn them from God. Yes, and understandably.
Speaker 1 (43:19):
So so what made you not make them besides like
not wanted them to hear the pastor say anything he
hasn't said yet?
Speaker 2 (43:27):
What is what made you not in any way say hey,
we have to do this? Well honestly, Also, I was
also trying to find the church I'm in now, I was,
you know, so I was bouncing around trying to find
it church. I like, so, yeah, I would let them watch.
I would try to get them, you know, I will.
(43:48):
I'm saying, that's what my plan. It's a goal. I
would like to take them physically to the building. Okay,
but we we I have. You're like, was one like
Christmas Eve Mass or whatever? There's a a like a
Unitarian church. I'm like, this is good. It's a good move. Yeah,
(44:11):
so I would take them there. And but for me,
I just I don't feel I don't feel like I've
been to church.
Speaker 3 (44:18):
You know.
Speaker 2 (44:18):
It's like, oh, okay, yeah, actually I took my church,
my son recently the church. What happened about that? Yeah,
on on Fire Island there's an episcopal uh uh church,
but it's held in our community center on Sundays. Right,
So he did he like it? Yeah? He did, Okay,
(44:42):
he did. He was like, all right, that is all right,
But you don't feel the need to in any way
impose faith on them, So you know, I do, but
I want to. And I feel like that's where, you know,
kind of failed. I get what you're saying, but like,
because my parents gave that to me, at least was
there and maybe if I you know, it was kind
(45:03):
of not practicing for you know, for a minute, It's
all it always been there. I could always tap into it, okay,
you know, like if things were like really bad or
I knew I could always tap into that to pull
myself out of you know, or for God to help
me to pull my you know, out of this whatever
thing I was in. So I want them to have that,
(45:26):
to know that that they they there's always a place
they can go. There's always yeah. Yeah, did you ever
flat out reject faith? No?
Speaker 1 (45:35):
No, see neither neither of. I have some friends who
have and then have returned to it. Yeah, But for me,
I'm always like, it's a place for me. You want
to show up and engage with your faith at all
times in a dream perfect world, right, But that's not
how it always goes. And sometimes you're like, oh, I
haven't tapped back in, and I haven't. I haven't felt
as connected to my faith. Yeah, and now I would
(45:57):
like to do that. And you make a point to
or but but I've said to people like, in my
lowest moments, I'm like, I have that thing I could go.
Speaker 2 (46:05):
I know, I know what to reach for.
Speaker 1 (46:08):
And so that's beautiful that you want to give that
to your kids, because it sounds like you feel like
it's a gift to your parents gave you.
Speaker 2 (46:14):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (46:14):
And I have a friend who once said, in terms
of imposing anything on her son, she and her partner
at the time, were like, we want to teach him
something because he's gonna look for something to believe in,
whether you show him the way or not, like people
or people want something to believe I feel.
Speaker 2 (46:34):
So that's beautiful. And so your daughter hasn't been to
church yet, I'm not not without me like that. Okay,
I will. It's gonna happen. I feel it. But say,
but here's the other thing too. I put this back
on on my wife because because when we were because
when they were born, she was so like like focused
(46:54):
in and like hell bent on getting them baptized, like
raised Catholic. So I'm like, okay, so she has the
faith thing. I can roll with this, right, she's I
learned the hell mary things whatever. As long as they
have something, I'm good with this. Yeah, it's the same guy, okay.
(47:16):
And so you know, she did all this and we
went to France, she got them baptized and then that
was it, and you know, and I was like, aren't
you supposed to be like classes? So she's like, oh no,
we we you know, baby, that's too much. That's just
like so there she's there, Catholic by name, Okay, okay,
(47:38):
but she's that way because her her parents didn't really
take them on her own. No no, no, no, no no.
It was kind of like the same way. They were
like baptist and then yeah, okay, wow, all right, and
you had no follow up. It was like there was
(47:58):
a follow up all that you press me to get
them baptized.
Speaker 1 (48:03):
We got to follow the follow because sometimes I think
some people think you just do the thing and then
they're they're good. But they have to have their own,
in my mind, relationship with it right for it to
be to be probably what you want it to be.
Speaker 2 (48:16):
Right. That is really lovely that you said she's got it.
I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (48:22):
I just imagine, like, oh cool, she really cares about yes,
And then you realize up under you're like, wait, no,
you just kind of gave us crazy. That's but you
put it on her, you know, told her business today
and you've blamed her. Is this what being a partner is? Okay,
I'm learning from you. I'm learning from you every step
of the way. I have to ask because I need
(48:47):
advice for life, all right. Your longevity in this industry
that can be very fickle, right, it's hard. It's what
you've done I think is remarkable and how you have
stayed so you and so funny and so relevant all
(49:07):
these years.
Speaker 2 (49:08):
How does one do it? That's oh, this segment is
called that was nice? But what about me? What about me? Okay, okay,
I had one goal right when I started this business.
You know, I even go go further back. I was
(49:29):
working in the government and you know, up at my
job said there. And I was at my job, at
my job at the government job, good job, good job,
good job, And I just knew I wasn't happy, and
I knew it was something else that I was supposed
to be doing. And and I remember everyone saying how
(49:51):
funny I was, and you should be on stage, and
so I was like, okay, you know, I'm gonna try it.
So I did some jokes and I knew immediately like
this is what I wanted to do. So my thing,
it all has al had always been I want to be,
you know, one of the funniest uh comedians, comics, not female, male,
(50:12):
just across the board, period, And that's what that's what
I work towards, and that's what I still work at,
you know, and all everything else kind of just happened
from that, right, I did stand up and I opened
up for Chris Rock when he was doing Bringing the Pain,
he was working on that, he remembered me. So when
(50:34):
he got his show, Hey this is funny comic, started writing, Oh,
so now from my stand up I I'm now writing,
I'm a writer. Okay, cool, but I'm still, you know,
slinging these jokes, still slinging these jokes. And then it's
from from there, Oh, We're gonna put you in front
of the camera. Oh I I guess, you know. And
(50:55):
and that happened because we we had booked a crew
to shoot some things, right and still had like a
couple hours left on the crew. P was a lie,
what y'all got, What y'all got? Come on to shoot something?
It has to be quick. Want to get in front
of this. And we're gonna do a video mama. You're
gonna you know, yeah, so a babysitter. So I'm playing
(51:17):
video mama. So now I'm in front of the camera.
Oh okay, and just things. But it all started from
that one goal, and so I always just go back
to that as far as and that probably is why
I'm still doing stand up. But everything just kind of
fell from that and still just stayed me you know yes.
Speaker 1 (51:39):
And you're very clear in that way. Now, given how
like what you have accomplished in the way we all
see you and the expectation we all have of you,
have you bombed anytime in the last like five years?
Speaker 2 (51:53):
Five years? I'm sure?
Speaker 1 (51:55):
And what does that feel like for you? Being one
of the sex and people come in and like, we
love Wanda, we love Wanda. Wanda is the funniest.
Speaker 2 (52:02):
What does it feel like? Are you? How do you
take BOMBI now, it hurts, it still still hurts. And
usually when it happens, it's ated like some charity event.
You're like, I didn't even have to do I didn't
have to do this ship. I ain't even have to
be just say that on the way out, driping I do.
I'm like, this sucks, man, y'all Like, whoy are y'all
even having comments here? Y'all talking over there? Whatever? Clean
(52:28):
clean click clean?
Speaker 3 (52:31):
You know what?
Speaker 2 (52:31):
Next time, I'm just gonna write a check. Yeah, I'm
gonna write a check. I'm not coming. I'm not coming, y'all.
You guys have been great tonight. You'll tell them you
guys have sucked, ruined. I'm not gonna sleep tonight. Yeah,
this is gonna be on my mind. I'm not gonna
sleep tonight. And are y'all okay with that? Yeah? Wow, yeah,
(52:53):
write a check. Yeah. But you never know which crowd.
Speaker 1 (52:56):
Sometimes they surprise you where you're like, this is not
the crowd that I thought would enjoy this material in
this way or this much. And then the crowds you
think are gonna be great, it's like, yeah, it's the
clink clink, clinking, not paying attention, heckling, huckling.
Speaker 2 (53:11):
You. I think it's lovely that you're telling the truth
on the way out. You don't have to say you
guys have been great. No, you don't have to. You
don't have to okay, and you no, okay and yeah,
or it's especially now you know if there's like somebody
doesn't agree with my politics and they'll start saying something
(53:32):
and they have to argue back whatever, and and it's
it's the thing of I have to really tell myself, Wanda,
don't go ballistic. Just that's one person. Yeah, so now
my security they know they so they just hurt get
that person out, okay, because they're like it'll ugly, it'll
get my head and I just get and I just
(53:52):
turn on everybody read and I don't like, yeah, since
y'all out there sitting out there with that person, you
can to help. Yeah, And then then I go too
far and then it's like, so, oh okay, you know
it's crazy and they're all out there. I saw that, like, no,
(54:13):
we can't move on, No, we can't just move on one.
But that was a lie. You really, yeah, you know what.
Speaker 1 (54:20):
But it's crazy how in life though the psychology of
and it's like evolutionary, evolutionary apparently that to look out
for threats, so like you see one negative comment or
someone one person is engaging with you negatively in the audience.
You could have a crowd of four hundred people and
one person who is like, I don't agree with your
politics and I'm gonna kind of say something about it.
(54:41):
But like, there are three hundred and ninety nine people enjoying,
but you're just like you, I am committed to getting you,
demolishing you, which is like it is it's evolutionary that
we were meant to scan for threats and like address them.
But it's so crazy how we still still we're not
under the same risk atty W one, but our brains
still do that to us, like all this love, but
(55:03):
I need to focus on that one person, that one
person so secure.
Speaker 2 (55:08):
I need to get security. I didn't connect it with
the evolution. Okay, that makes sense a little something. I
might have made it up. No, I did it. I
didn't make that far. I didn't make it up. I
need to get security though, That's what I'm hearing, so
they can address sick security.
Speaker 1 (55:24):
And this person left the nasty comic. Go get him, fine,
I want you to show up to their house and
scare them. I really appreciate you being here, and I
know I've had a selfish moment where I got to
get advice from you. We have a listener who needs advice.
Would you be willing to give them advice as well? Okay, Kevin,
We're ready to hear from them.
Speaker 3 (55:46):
My best friend is engaged to a man that I
literally could not give less of a fuck about. And
I'm afraid that my role as like best friend is
being replaced by this guy that, again I don't even
give a fuck about. Although he didn't vote.
Speaker 2 (56:08):
Call me back. I don't have his number, but didn't vote.
And what he didn't vote? He said?
Speaker 1 (56:13):
The guy didn't vote. He's like, I don't give a
fuck about him, but he didn't vote, and was that it? Yeah,
he's like, oh, he's like, I really don't give a
fuck about him, although he didn't vote. It was just
like one little jab to the man on the way out. Okay,
so what would you say our listener does about this
best friend engaged?
Speaker 2 (56:31):
It was layers to that.
Speaker 1 (56:32):
It's so much there's I wish we could ask follow
up questions, but it's and he said, calling back, but
we don't have his number.
Speaker 2 (56:38):
His best friend is engaged. Look that I have friends
that I'm not really involved with their you know, with
their partner. But it doesn't you know what I'm saying,
Like like, it doesn't mean that that they shouldn't be together.
(57:02):
You know, it's obviously it's something that she gets from
or he or there's the two guys. Okay, it's something
that he gets from this other guy, this from his
partner that makes him happy. Right, So your your thing
is just you're just supposed to be happy for your
friend and make sure your friend is good and maybe
(57:23):
be a situation where it's good that you don't give
a fuck about this guy. Because when your friend sounds
off on him. You could be like that. Yep, I know,
I told you exactly exactly, so you're that sounding board
for for your friends. So just you know, Hey, relationships
(57:44):
are meant for us to work out childhood ship. Basically,
it's yeah, so you roman attract, you end up being
attracted to some body who Uh so you can actually
have adult conversations with someone when you couldn't you know,
(58:10):
have that conversation as a child.
Speaker 1 (58:12):
I've heard this sounds like relationships are just your re
enacting childhood in any ways.
Speaker 2 (58:17):
Yeah, but but as an adult now you get to
speak as an adult, Yes, with some you know, so
with some agency. So I think he should just status.
You know, maybe maybe he got a good dick and
that's that's all. And you don't want you don't know,
you don't know what friend's vote could be, right, just
(58:39):
what I'm saying, it could be. He's like you think
I'm talking to him. We don't. We ain't talk. We
don't talk. We're just I'm just trying to lock this
dick up. The pipe is getting late. I'm not worried
about it. Have you hang out with and do culture
ship and vote? I don't need to you think I'm
(59:00):
watching PBS with this molefu. You know what?
Speaker 1 (59:06):
That is so valid because also the listener said, I
don't give a fuck about I couldn't care less about.
But I'm like, sounds like you don't like him first
of all, but she keeps it out, so you're you
have to call it what it is. I think you
don't like him. It's it's giving out a link and
then the little dig at the end, and he didn't vote,
but he might have a good dick and that might
be all.
Speaker 2 (59:24):
Your friend is looking for at this stage in their
life life. Yeah, that's true. You know what. That is valid.
Speaker 1 (59:29):
And I hadn't even considered because because every once in
a while you will see a couple together you won't
even know if the other person is a good person
or not, or they're voted or not whatever, and you're like,
that is an interesting match. But somebody's got some good genitals.
That's often what it is.
Speaker 2 (59:45):
You are so right. Let me think about that next
time I see a mismatched couple. Yeah, I'm doing something.
Speaker 1 (59:52):
Somebody's doing something different. Wanda, thank you so much for
being here. I really appreciate you. Best wishes on the tour.
Speaker 2 (01:00:01):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (01:00:02):
I pray nobody makes you see red. Nobody does that,
and if they do, security gets them morning. Okay, But
come on, t I I feel like he owns that word.
Thank you so much, really appreciate you. I'm so glad
you could be.
Speaker 2 (01:00:21):
Here with you. All right, folks, Folks, what where am
I from?
Speaker 1 (01:00:31):
We've established that I'm from Maryland. We don't really say
that word. I guess I can't speak for everyone. Their
point is I just talked to Wanda Sykes.
Speaker 2 (01:00:38):
That was very fun.
Speaker 1 (01:00:39):
I love the Maryland specifics of that conversation. Many of
you may not like it, but guys, that's okay. And
I often talk about things people like and don't like
on this podcast, and I'm here to say it whatever,
it's okay, dog. I loved that conversation. She was so insightful,
so funny, and getting to hear her talk about her
children and savage ways was quite delightful for me. You know,
(01:01:03):
what I didn't get to talk to her about is
Instagram use and how she feels about memes and reels.
But if I were to guess, I think she ain't
got time for that when we're talking about our patients, right.
I have a feeling she doesn't have the patience for
endless reels and memes and tiktoks all day.
Speaker 2 (01:01:21):
That was the sense I got.
Speaker 1 (01:01:22):
I don't want to pin that on Wanda, but just
a hunch. I'm intuitive, you see, like a parent. Anyway,
if you want advice from me and my guest, next guest,
some guest, please, I'm begging you. I'm begging you to
call us and leave a voicemail at five O two
eight four nine three two three seven. I remember the number.
(01:01:46):
There's no teleprompter, baby, that's just right up here. Okay,
five O two eight four nine three two three seven.
That's five O two Thanks TCHX.
Speaker 2 (01:01:55):
Dad's more than one.
Speaker 3 (01:01:57):
Bye.
Speaker 2 (01:01:58):
Thanks Dad.
Speaker 1 (01:01:58):
Is a production of Will Ferrell's Big Money Players in
iHeart Podcasts. I'm your host Ago wodem Our producer is
Kevin Bartelt, and our executive producer is Matt Appadaka.
Hi, guys, I may go out him. You know that,
or maybe you don't. Maybe this is your first time
tuning in. If it is welcome, I'm so glad you're here.
All I'm doing is running my mouth for an hour
or more, and somehow.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
People are interested in listening to that. God bless you all.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
Can I just say that this podcast is meant to connect, inspire,
maybe bring you a little joy. Also, my hope is
that we could just make the world a better place,
and so I have little silly ideas as to how
to do that.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
Right.
Speaker 1 (00:41):
So, today I've been thinking a lot about those people.
We all have those people in our lives who send
us memes and reels on Instagram and TikTok's just all
day long, and it's like you can't keep up. You
can't keep up. Even right now, I'm getting sweaty thinking
about it. I have friends whom I'm like, I know
there are unread messages in my Instagram account because I
(01:05):
just can't keep up with the memes and the reels.
I can't keep up, and it's like NonStop. It's like
has Ai taken over my friend? Or is my friend
really doing this? How are they keeping up? At this pace,
it seems near impossible, certainly impossible for me to watch
them all because it's not just one person for me,
it's multiple people. But I know everyone has at least one.
But imagine you have multiple friends doing that, how and
(01:28):
how stressful? And they go, did you watch the thing
I sent you? Did you watch that thing? Did you
see that thing?
Speaker 2 (01:32):
And I'm like, which one? Which one? You've sent? So many?
Speaker 1 (01:35):
My god, I'm sweating right now. I'm really sweating. You
can't see. I won't show you, but I'm kind of
sweating at the thought. Chill down my spine as well.
It's they go together, I guys, it's a lot. Think
about the way you are inundating.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
It's giving spam.
Speaker 1 (01:54):
Maybe you say to your friend, hey, friend, you're giving
spam because that's what it's giving. And it feels stressful.
And of course, there are worse things in the world. Guys,
there are always worse things in the world. I want
to be very clear that I am aware of that.
But boy, oh boy, getting an endless stream of reels
(02:15):
is so stressful because you want to engage with your friend.
I don't want my friends to feel like I'm ignoring them.
I want to be able to laugh and have shared
contact with them. But I'm like, how are you watching
all of these things and then also being productive in
your day? Because I can tell you right now, to
watch all the memes and reels you've sent me, I
would have to carve out time, meaningful time. This isn't
(02:37):
like a casual. I'm having to carve out real time.
It's too much and when they have it so some friends,
I used to double tap just to be like, Okay,
yeah I watched it, like to acknowledge receipt right and
hope that they thought that that meant I watched it.
And then I realized, oh no, I can't double tap
anymore because I'm encouraging them. That's positive affirmation. It's a
(02:59):
literal red heart, right, So I have chilled on even
clicking on them. And I'm like, I guess you're free
to send them to me, but I do not have
to watch, and I will watch at my leisure, and
my leisure damn near doesn't exist, So I will not watch,
I guess, is what I'm trying to say. But if
you tell me one's really really really really really good,
(03:20):
I will tap in. And if I tap in and
watch that one, and it's not really really really really good.
Like you promise, honey, you're dead. You can never. Your
word is not bond. Your word means nothing. And I
won't watch another one of your reels for some time.
I'll put you on ice for a little bit punishment
time out. I'm not watching anything you send me, so anyway,
(03:40):
I just know I actually maybe on the podcast one
day down the line, I'll like get to sit with
one of those people who sends memes and reels all
day and ask them all the questions I have for them,
and one of which being how do you have the
time to keep up with this? Because I know you're
not just sending them to me. Sometimes you can tell
someone sent them to multiple people, right, you can say
(04:04):
in a very diabolical way. Instagram allows you to select
multiple people and send separately. And sometimes that's very obvious
to me because every once in a while a person
sending them to me is someone I'm like, we've barely
ever had a conversation, but you're like sending memes and reels.
It's very interesting. I understand it to be a way
to connect, but I think we've gotten I think we've
gotten away from ourselves people.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
And I just want to reel us back. Oh you
see what I did there? I didn't mean to.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
No, And is it real us back in or rain
us back in? I don't know, honey, it's my podcast.
Tell me in the comments what I did wrong. I
know you will, and that's fine, and that's fine.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
Today.
Speaker 1 (04:45):
Something I'm gonna do very right though, is talk to
Wanda Sykes, the legend that she is.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
I'm so excited. So here we are. My next guest
is an absolute legend. Do you understand?
Speaker 1 (05:06):
Actress, writer, comedian, producer, coming up in the final season
of The Upshaws this year and going on tour with
the Please and Thank You tour across the country. I
just hit the mic.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
I'm hyping. I'm so excited. It's Wanda Sykes. Yay, thank you, Yes,
make some noise for what makes them real. Let's hear it.
Wanda Sykes in the building? Are you kidding me? Absolute legend?
One of my favorites.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
My assistant texting me this morning was I have a
great time with miss Wanda. She's absolutely one of my favorites.
And I feel like everyone says that about you.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
That's so sweet, but you would deserve it. You've been
working hard. I've been out here. I've been out here
a long time. How are you with compliments in general?
I'm I'm okay. I sometimes I you know, I will,
I will deflect it, go back to Okay, what's you
(06:03):
up to? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (06:04):
So if I was like I like your blouse, which
I do, how would you you just say thank you?
Speaker 2 (06:08):
Thank you? Okay? And we wouldn't tried to. I used to,
And sometime I have to go I didn't pick it out. Somebody,
somebody addressed me. See, it always.
Speaker 1 (06:17):
Comes like, yeah, it was just ten dollars that you
could get what I'm working on. Yeah, it's crazy. I'm
I'm working on also being like thank you and then
but I don't know. It's like where does the conversation
go from there? So then I feel responsible for making.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
It go somewhere else?
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Right, Anyway, I have to tell you you're a legend again.
I just just listen. I'm making you uncomfortable. I just
feel so honored to have you here.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
Thank you. Yeah, happy to be here. I'm so glad. Now,
wonder do you have anything anyone you want to say?
Thank you too? I want to say thank you because
I thought thanks, I should say thanks. Yeah, I want
to say thanks to you. And I thought about this first.
I was I was gonna say something funny because I
(07:05):
took a really good poop this morning. Can I ask
about it? Can I ask about it?
Speaker 1 (07:09):
We don't have the heart, but can I ask about it?
Was it the one where you didn't have to wipe after?
You know, when they come out clean? You guys know
what I'm talking about. You've never had one where you
don't have to wipe after to.
Speaker 2 (07:22):
Be sure that? That was amazing, right, it was amazing.
I'll just say it was amazing. You don't want to
get what I want to have details, but it was
just it just caught me off guard, like I didn't
know it was, oh oh wow, Like did you feel
lighter much? I know that. Yeah, So that's that was
my original. I thought about it, and I said, no,
(07:44):
I want to think, and don't you assholes cut this out?
What I'm about to really think? I'm gonna think my
chiefest staff Susan show. Okay, he is amazing. Uh, just
you know, just takes cap everything just from the smallest
detail to the I mean the largest thing. Hey, my
(08:07):
sixties birthday. Okay, I'll plan it for you, you know,
just anything and just she just does such a great
job and I'm just so just blessed to have her.
That's beautiful. Susan, chief of staff for ES Psychs. We
have to say thanks to you.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
I love to hear that because I imagine a person
in a position like you, and I am in some
stage of my career right now and can feel so
overwhelmed at times, and so to have someone like Susan,
like I already thought of it.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
Yes, it feels like a dream. That sounds like a
dream though. Yeah. They can look at you and go, okay, this,
she's overwhelmed, So let me do something extra. Let me
you know, I'm want to take this off and we'll
do that next week. That nice. Nice? Did you grow
up with that kind of care? Oh? Hell, okay, neither
did I. I just asked to be cute to be
(08:56):
hoa okay, all right, So it's it's nice to have
a Susan. What was growing up like for you? Growing up?
My dad was in the in the army military and
and uh my mom uh she was like worked at
a newspaper like the classified ass section. And but when
we moved, she stayed home and just got us settled
(09:20):
because we know we made that huge move from Virginia
to Maryland.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
But I'm from the yeah, Baltimore and yeah, but you
know what about the d m V. And I don't
know if this is controversial, Baltimore doesn't feel like they're
a part of it. I know they feel like it's
southern Maryland, DC and Virginia, right, And so people say
it to me there, I'm like, but Baltimore, Maryland's Baltimore,
Comma Maryland, right.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
But I'm like, but I also am a little bit
like that where.
Speaker 1 (09:46):
I'm like, oh, when you say DMV, you're not including
me and my people exactly.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
That's not right. It's not but it's not right because
we're a part of it. It's like they cut Maryland
off at like Silver Spring, Yes, exactly they do. That's
exactly where. That's exactly where, and it's like that's Baltimore,
like like open Marlboro, that's the MV. But Laurel MV. Laurel.
Let's name all the towns because I don't want to
show off exactly that's there. Do you have another one?
(10:14):
And out come on at Suitland, Suitland. But you know what,
I think, glenn Burnie is what blew it. And everybody's like, nah,
we don't want we don't want to. We're not claiming
Burnie because we don't claim glen Burney. Say nobody claims
glen Burney. Say my mom lived in Glenburnie three years ago.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
I didn't tell anybody. I said, yeah, just moved out
of Baltimore. They're like, where, and I was like, somewhere
from somewhere.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Yeah, it's like Dundalk, Oh, Dundalk. Oh my goodness.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
And my brother so I grew up with people who
grew up in Dundalk, Like so dun Dog wasn't far
from us, but me and my brother would joke a lot,
and this is messed up. I love you, Baltimore, Baltimore County.
I love all of these city, but my brother and
I used to joke me, like, you're from Dundalk.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
Neither of us were from Dundalk, but it was like
an insult.
Speaker 1 (10:54):
And then last season on SNL, somebody wrote a sketch
I'm at table read I'm not. I'm in the sketch,
but I didn't. I was not involved in the writing
of it. Someone from Maryland was though, but someone wrote
a sketch and in the sketch and it goes to
air there someone goes, oh, she's from Dundalk.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
And I was at table losing it.
Speaker 1 (11:13):
Yes, but everyone was laughing by the way, and I
was like, but you guys don't understand. That's really specific.
I love that, you know, Dundale. That was the whole
thing with me and my brother. You're from Dundalk.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
I love that.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
Okay, So yes, that is a big move though because
Baltimore to southern Maryland, we're not even the same state
in our minds, like they don't like us.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
I don't know if what about Baltimore County is that
considered DMVM from Baltimore County, but that should be dining,
you know, because it's Baltimore though it's not the county
when you out in the county. I'm from county when
you're out in the county, out in the county. So
that's that's the that's but it's still Baltimore.
Speaker 1 (11:56):
So my address growing up it was Baltimore, Common Maryland
two and two three. Then I won't say the number.
People can figure out the rest. But and also what
would that if I said it out loud.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
Oh that I didn't do.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
It wouldn't matter I should say it. I'm not going
to that, I refuse. But we feel separate from the
rest of Maryland. And for you to move from big
move from Maryland to Virginia, big leap when they're Virginia
to Maryland, Virginia to Maryland. Excuse me, what happened in
the family?
Speaker 2 (12:23):
Oh we were around white people. Oh yeah, so there's
more white people in Maryland. Well where we lived, I
mean in Virginia we lived, you know, it was just
around black people and then started so I saw white
people at school. And then we moved to Virginia, I
mean moved to Maryland. We lived in this neighborhood that
(12:46):
was just developing, and there was only one other black
family on our streets. So it was like, wow, it's
a lot of white Oh my god, how did it feel?
Speaker 1 (12:55):
And also what part of Maryland now that we're getting
very specific today, just remember.
Speaker 2 (13:00):
My dad was stationed at Fort me So we were
in Gambrels County. Okay, I know county. Never heard of Gambrelsah,
but I'm from Yeah, it's like Cton, Okay. Yeah, I
know that. Okay, so you saw white people and how
did that feel? It was? It was fine, okay, ended
up being all right, it's all right. Yeah. I mean
we didn't really think about about it too much, so
(13:21):
it was like just and I think that's how how
it works. It's like we get there and it's like, okay,
cool white people, and even go oh, but how would
they feel about us? Right, that's what it is. If
they're cool, cool, if there's no thrief, there's no brief.
And so they were cool. They were cool for like
(13:42):
one family. One family wasn't cool. They were straight up.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
Just oh they were yeah, and you hate to see it, frankly,
you do hate to see there's God, it feels like
in every one of those neighborhoods. We had one in
my neighborhood that I was in a new development to
in Baltimore County, and we had one in my neighborhood
who had.
Speaker 2 (13:58):
The Confederate flag.
Speaker 1 (14:00):
Oh wow, yeah, one of those, right, and so, but
always one gotta be one. It's gotta be one.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
It's not like you know, they're not around, they're still here.
The shadows.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
They're pretending to be the other kind and they're that
kind anyway, you follow, you do follow, Okay, so we do.
I think it's a Maryland girl thing, but again I'm not.
I'm technically you say I am Maryland, yes, because it's
I'm Baltimore County.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Okay. And this is a big review.
Speaker 1 (14:30):
This is very vulnerable for me to say from the
county publicly because there's a lot of people gonna disown
me today because it's the whole thing. I'm not from
Baltimore City. So then they go, then you're not from Baltimore,
but I am anyway.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
Which you're you're part of the DMV though, Okay, so
I'll be part of the family. Thank you. All Right,
it's official. I said it, and so it is. Wanda
psych said it, and that's law. Period. So growing up,
you go to Maryland, you're in Gambres. Your dad is around, yes,
and he is not necessarily the gentlest given military Because
(15:04):
when I was like, did you get that kind of
care growing up that Susan's giving, you were like, hell nah,
So what was it like the dynamic with you and
your parents? My dad was well, first of all, there
you know, the black people from Virginia grew up in
you know, Jim Crow South and all. So they there's
already a you know, a strictness or conservatism about them, right,
(15:29):
you know, church and all. So that part stayed. But
as far as the job, I don't. I don't. My
dad didn't bring the military home like he wanted us
to live off base. We didn't live on you know,
on base. So he was good about not, you know,
not playing military at home.
Speaker 1 (15:52):
Why do you think he wanted you to live off base.
Was it so that he there was a separation between
his vibe at work and his vibe at home.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
I think so, I think so, I think, you know,
maybe he also was like I'm not being military all day,
you know, four seven walking around whatever, you know. Yeah,
and also they got a housing allowance if you live
off base. And my parents are very smart when it
(16:19):
comes to you know, uh, finances, finance, so I think
he was like, oh, I can get a house with
this boom boom, you know. Smart.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Okay, so they did know the finance yecause I'll tell
you that that's another thing I didn't learn growing up,
anything about finances.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
They don't teach you that in school.
Speaker 1 (16:35):
And then then if you don't really learn that at home, right,
because in school they're teaching you like long division and
reading Ernest Hemingway, which is great. But then I'm like,
what about how to save my money and make it
work for me? So that's cool that you got that.
How many siblings do you have?
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Just want one older brother? Were you too close? Yeah? Okay, yes, right,
that's beautiful, and then your mom we can go forever
not you know, and then tapping do you have friends
like that who you liked without talking to each other?
And then it's like, right, yeah, have you had friends
who respond poorly to your absence for an extended period
(17:13):
of time? And then trying to drop back in, Oh,
you know what I mean? Yeah, I know what you mean.
I'm just trying to think. I don't No, that hasn't happened.
You are blessed is a highly favorite. I'm trying to think, No,
it hasn't happened. Wow, Yeah, that's incredible.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
I feel like so well, I feel like everyone I
everyone I know has at least one person who was
like they didn't do well with the life. I'm adulting.
Life happens. Yeah, we get busy, let's tap back in.
There's everyone has I feel like a tale of there
was that one person who didn't get it that like,
we're adults and we get busy and we'll tap back
(17:52):
in as soon as we're able because some people are cleaning.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
I love that you have lived a blessed the barb
being that long. I'm like, you are blessed. And your
dynamic with your mom is what, how would you describe
it or growing up? What was it like? Because my
mom and I we've always been pretty close. Yeah, it's that. Yeah,
(18:18):
we've always been We've always been pretty close. I mean
there was a moment when there was like, yeah, we
kind of had some issues and that and that all
had to do with you know, me coming out that
that was hard for them. So but yeah, we're cool. Now.
We found this thing. Now we both love to go
(18:39):
to the casino. Yeah, and I usually just when I
will go to the casino, I will play the table
games and my mom plays the slots. But so when
I go visit and we go to the casino, I
want to talk to her. We want to we wanted
so I started, let me say do this bullsh right right,
(19:00):
and now I'm hooked. You're hooked now too. It's contagious
I'm not do you do Vegas at all? Ever? Yes, see,
I don't like Vegas, and maybe if I gambled, I
would like Vegas. Oh yeah, that's the only thing. You
go to Vegas to gamble or if you just go
to see a show, great shows in Vegas. Yes, and eat.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
Yeah, the food is good in Vegas. I will give
it to them. I will give it to them for that.
The Vegas food, I'm like, they don't play like I
don't love breakfast, but the breakfast at the hotels is busty, crazy.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
It's so good. So when how old were you when
you came out?
Speaker 3 (19:39):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (19:39):
God, trying to take you way back, because I want
to know I was, oh, oh, I know it was.
It was right after the election when I was like
out out and that was what that was like till
two thousand and nine. I guess there was a two
thousand and nine November fifteenth, I want to say, now,
(20:03):
was that right at the Prop eight passing on Probert?
It was a national day of I don't even know
what day of the week it is today, so you
know it's eight. It was two thousand and eight.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Okay, so you were a grown woman, grown woman coming
out and then it created attention in a dynamic with
your mom, which makes sense. I understand how that it
had to be my forties.
Speaker 2 (20:25):
I was probably forty.
Speaker 1 (20:26):
Yeah, but like grown, making your own money, have a
name for yourself, celebrated by all of us, all of
our favorite and then coming out to your mom and
then it creates a dynamic. Was it a conversation that
was it like one conversation and then she was like
I don't understand and I don't accept.
Speaker 2 (20:44):
Yeah, it was like she like just fell apart, broke
a heart. And it was because I told her before.
You know, I probably told her maybe maybe four years before, okay,
and she, yeah, she just had a big just just
(21:04):
to break down and why, God, what did I do?
And I'm like, oh, really, you're gonna make this about you? Right,
maybe it's about you? Why is she bringing now you're
comforting her? What did Yeah? And I was like I can't.
I can't do this. I can't do right, I can't write.
So she could have been an actress almost, it's given.
Speaker 1 (21:26):
I would have watched that, like, God, I've had one
breakdown like that, and I I couldn't stop myself from
having it right And in real time. It's a crazy
story because I was freezing my eggs and they were
supposed to put They give you like a box of
(21:46):
just needles, and I'm not in syringes to prepare. You're
in charge, but you basically become a nurse, which I
think is kind of messed up. I think that's a
lot of responsibility for a person. So they send you
with all these things and you don't know what any
of it is because you're not a nurse. So you're like,
I don't know. They told me get five of this thing.
You go call this pharmacy to say fill this prescription
(22:09):
from this clinic, the fertility clinic or whatever. And they
gave me a box of stuff. I was like, presumably
all of the things are here, because I don't know
what any of it is. It's like reading foreign language.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (22:20):
So on the last day, I've done everything diligently. I
even left a dinner party once to go give myself
my shot right at seven pm.
Speaker 2 (22:27):
I was like, I'll be back, gotta go give myself
a shot in.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
The belly, and so so diligent. And on the last
day where I went, you're supposed to do two shots
on the last day, right before they do the retrieval
the next day, and I go to and I was like, well,
thank god, I haven't had any moments because I know
I'm full of hormones and I've been told I could
get emotional. I'm like, I haven't gotten emotional. Well, I
(22:49):
go to look in the fridge on the last day
and it's ten forty five when I'm supposed to give
myself the shot PM.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
I opened.
Speaker 1 (22:55):
There's one shot in there. There's like one thing, and
they had given me multi to pull up the thing,
the one version, so I didn't notice that this other
injection was not in there.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
Wanda.
Speaker 1 (23:07):
I was like your mom that day, why god, I
think I just think. I called my sister and I
remember sliding down the wall and had this awareness like
you're doing too much, but I couldn't stop it. I
was like, you're being so dramatic, but I could not
get myself to stop.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
I was like, the other shot is missing. But again,
like your mother, I've made this about me and we're
gonna go back to you. Ok I enjoyed it.
Speaker 1 (23:45):
Was your brother, supportive of you always. Okay, okay. You
seem to have a lot of grace though, does that?
See MACI because you have to, you know, it's.
Speaker 3 (23:57):
You do.
Speaker 2 (23:57):
You have to give people grace exactly how you know
grace has been given to you. So I yeah, I
try to do that and that makes sense. Yeah, let people,
let people work through this stuff and you're patient that
Oh no, well I am. I am to an extent,
(24:18):
you know. Uh, but my patience isn't I want to
sit here and be patient with them. My patient is, girl,
I haint got time for that, right, That's that's my patience. Okay,
that's why I'm gonna let you deal with d I
got time I don't have, but I love it.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
It's boundaries though, and then people always kind of come around,
right they always do.
Speaker 2 (24:37):
That's really beautiful. Yeah, you have kids wander yes, okay,
how many twins? Twins? Sixteen year olds old? Are they driving? Yeah?
They just got their learners permit and my daughter's driving.
Uh and but my son he's off doing other stuff
right now. He doesn't worry about driving. He's not worried
about driving.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
I always find that so interesting because when I was
in Maryland, is fifteen and nine months you could get
your perm, you remember, Okay, I at fifteen and nine months,
like Mayday's March tenth, April tenth.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
I was there, Yeah, is that correct? Fifteen and nine months.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
I'm doing math wrong. But anyway, point is fifteen and
nine months. I was like, I'm off, I'm getting my
I'm getting my permit today. I wanted I wanted to
drive so badly. I wanted the independence. I wanted to
be able to skirt myself around. And so anytime I
meet someone grown, I know so many grown people, especially
because I live in New York. You're like, I've never
driven a card and I don't have interest.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Isn't that crazy? It's crazy to me. It's crazy to me.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
Some of them have moved here, even to LA and
they're like, I just I don't I'm not interested in
learning how to drive. And I'm like, that's all I
ever wanted was to drive. So your son is like that,
He's like, I'm not dripping.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Yeah. Also, he's going to school in France right now.
Oh yeah, So he's like, when I get back here.
Speaker 1 (25:53):
Okay, do you think he'll be I feel like he's
going to come back here and be like I don't care.
Speaker 2 (25:58):
Yeah, You're like, I'm not doing or not doing it.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
Yeah, So as being a parent made you more patient
than you maybe were before you had kids, I.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Think so, yes, yeah, I think so in what way
is it more patient? Or I think it's being a
parent you have have to put in your mind that, uh,
you're not the most important thing. You're you know, like whatever,
(26:30):
Oh yeah that's might might be what you want, but
it's not happening and you just have to put yourself
on the back burner for a minute. Yeah. Yeah, so
it's not patience, it's just okay.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
It's almost like surrender in a sense, like surrender and
be like yeah, because I think about parenting, it's good that.
I mean, if you could learn surrender and if I
could learn surrender in other ways in my life, things
would just be better all around. But I'm like you,
as an individual without kids, I'm like, yeah, everything is
kind of in my world kind of when I would
(27:02):
like to do the thing contingent upon other people occasionally,
right right, But I'm like, everything's like when I would
like to do the thing how I would like to
do the thing in my space, and when you think
about being responsible for another I have a dog, and
even that has made me.
Speaker 2 (27:16):
So sweet Angelo. His name is Chief he is. Do
you have any dogs I had? I had? Yeah, I
had a dog, Riley. He was almost eighteen years. Still
miss him. He's been going with four years. And then
we had a a Chihuahua, Simon, and just back in
August had to say goodbye to him. I'm sorry, I'm
(27:37):
so he was almost nineteen.
Speaker 1 (27:38):
Oh wow, you spend a long time with them. I
mean when I first got my puppy, because I got
his puppy, I was like, I, yes, everything right now
is not about me, and I'm kind of having to
change my schedule because I've raised that little dog. Yeah,
but I'm like, this is a good practice for me
a person who wants children. I'm like to go, I
have to keep you in mind. And some things like
(27:59):
him having diarrhea or vomiting at the most inconvenient times,
and I'm like, this is right now what I was
about to go do drop back burner to attend to you.
I do think it sounds silly, but I'm like, I
do really think it's kind of practice.
Speaker 2 (28:13):
No, You're absolutely right. I thought that with with Riley.
Why when I met my wife, I had Riley, and
uh I don't think if I had if I hadn't
had right Riley, I wouldn't have been in any shape too. Okay, Yeah,
they have this relationship and kids and all that. It's
(28:37):
crazy how that I've been out here in these streets.
If I had Riley made me go home.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Really also want there is nothing outside nothing nothing, And
I know that you know that now, but for other
people who are back, but back.
Speaker 2 (28:56):
Then, was there stuff outside? Back then, there was a
lot out I wish I would been grown up back then.
Tell me about it. What was outside it was?
Speaker 1 (29:05):
Wait, tell me our spots and all. There's nothing now.
You want to be at home with your Yeah, and
I similarly right, and I'm and I don't have the
partner and the kids. But I'm like, just let me
be at the house with my dog. When I got him,
though at first, I was like, this is a huge
responsibility that I feel like people won't speak about enough.
(29:26):
Getting a puppy. Did you have Riley as a puppy? Yes, yeah,
that is a lot of responsibility because everyone's like, here's
my cute dog, here's a picture of my dog.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
I'm walking my dog. That's nice.
Speaker 1 (29:36):
But then the reality of it is like waking up
every three hours because this little animal that is either
gonna pooh and pee all over your home needs to
go or you're gonna let them do it on your
run again for the hundredth time. I just remember being like,
what have I done?
Speaker 2 (29:50):
I might need to give him back.
Speaker 1 (29:52):
I mean, that's the truth. And since he's a dog,
he'll never know that I thought that. But I'm just
confessing here, and I'd have friends who have.
Speaker 2 (29:58):
Had to give dogs back. They're like, I didn't realize
it would be this much of a responsibility. That's funny
because I felt that when we brought the twins home
really because in the hospital it was it was good.
And then we got home and they were both napping
and I'm like looking at at Alex and we were like, oh,
(30:19):
this is cool. We got this. Then you know, they
they went on. They were cool and it was time
to go to bed. So as we put them in
the bed, we laid down and was like a I
was like, oh, I got this and the other one
so and then it came like both of them back
and forth, back and forth like this one no no,
no way, no no change, this one feet this will
(30:39):
And I really said, we might have to take one back,
because yeah, I said, we not one. It's a lot.
Speaker 1 (30:49):
I mean they say like twins having twins in generational
two as well in genetics or something like that, and
I think my generation in my family is due for twins.
And I'm scared because I would I would be too
scared to have twins because exactly what you're describing. I
feel like my head would be spinning.
Speaker 2 (31:06):
And that's what it was. You're like, we might have
to take one back. Yeah, we were lucky because the
telling all her business, because you don't have to say
the name. Yeah, because my wife was like, oh, we
can put we should put The doctor said that there's
three good eggs, so we should put maybe put the
three back. I said no, no, no, two was tops top.
(31:30):
He said, if we put two, we get one, we're winning. Yeah.
See we put two, Yeah, get two, okay, but we'll
do it. We got it, so glad you did. But
if we get three, one staying here, like one one
staying here, say that right now, I'm going to pray
for one of them to eat one. If we're not
(31:53):
doing this, we're not doing three.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
But then you wouldn't even want to keep the baby
that ate the other baby, because you're like, that's a
different kind of baby, that's a different had a child
gonna grow up to be something something else.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
I'm gonna gwup to be such true, I know that's twins. Twins.
Speaker 1 (32:06):
God bless all the parents out there raising twins or
triplets or more.
Speaker 2 (32:10):
I'm like, just nowadays, just raising kids. It's a lot.
My mom is one of nine. Damn, God damn, that's
what I say. I'm like, how but there's really one
of the sets of kids. It's nine.
Speaker 1 (32:25):
Three are a set of triplets. So like, technically gave birth.
I'm gonna be bad at math right now, three or
six times something like that. Oh yeah, it's crazy, it's crazy.
Or seven times. Anyway, how many siblings do each your
parents have?
Speaker 2 (32:40):
Roughly if you got I think both of them, somewhere
between seven and nine.
Speaker 1 (32:48):
Yeah, And that was so normal, and now it's like
and I used to think because I'm one of four,
and for whatever reason, when I was a kid, I'm like,
I want four kids because I was one of four.
And now each year of life I go one less,
one less. For a few years, I'm like, actually, one
would be that's great.
Speaker 2 (33:03):
Yeah, yeah, it's maybe a time shared exactly. We don't
need to do all of that. We don't need to
do all of that. So what do you How would
you describe this phase of your life? Though I'm in
a good space and it's trying to just fare out
what's the what's the next thing? I guess more of
a challenge, I think, or it's more of the of
(33:29):
creating projects. Okay, I think yeah, instead of it's always well,
I shouldn't say always, because we just did the upshaws
and I created that, but it's you know, it's always
getting hired for different projects, which I'm grateful for. But
(33:50):
I think I want to, yeah, create some stuff now.
Speaker 1 (33:53):
Yeah, that's when you say a challenge, is it because
that's not something you've done as regularly as you would
like to.
Speaker 2 (34:00):
But I think it's because of the of the type
of project I'm trying to think of, you know, it's
more that.
Speaker 1 (34:08):
Yeah, and in the midst of that, what made you
want to go on tour? Obviously you have more jokes
to tell, more to say to us.
Speaker 2 (34:13):
And is that that was it? Or is it? Is
there any other reason that you'd be like I would
want to go. I love doing stand up. I love
you know, touring, well, I should say I love torn,
but I loved sounds. Really it's hard. It sounds lovely
until you're doing it. But it's not like I'm standing,
you know, like a cheap motel. You know, it's like, okay,
(34:38):
you know, it's nice, it's nice. Travel first, it's not.
It's nice, but it's still it's just getting up and yes,
but staying like one night in a place.
Speaker 1 (34:48):
I don't know if you have multiple nights and multiples
uh one night, yeah, but like one night, take off
the next day in time for check off, check out,
in order to getxity. It's a little bit of a grind,
it is. And it's not to complain because how blessed
are we to get to do what we do. But
it's such an interesting thing when I've romanticized being on
the road and getting to see every little city, and
(35:08):
I've gone on tours with podcasts I've done, I've done
shows myself, and I'm like.
Speaker 2 (35:14):
This is a grind.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
Yeah truly, Because you say, yeah, I've been to Portland,
but I haven't really been to Portland. I did a
show at Portland, like people be like, how was it?
Speaker 2 (35:23):
I don't know. I got in and out unfortunately exactly.
But so you're you're enjoying though, you enjoyed not necessarily
being on the road, but live performing. Of course I do. Yeah,
I still love that. Yeah, that's beautiful. Do either of
your kids want to be in the business? Not yet?
All right? Not yet? How would you respond should they Yeah? Yeah,
(35:44):
if they want to do it, you know, i'd be supportive.
I mean, I wouldn't help them, but i'd supportive. You're
not gonna let them take advantage of a little nepotism, no, no, see,
I think it's great.
Speaker 1 (35:55):
I'm gonna have nepo babies. I'm like, I can not
wait to have an epple baby. You're so when you
you're really not gonna help them like not and of course,
like as a parent would, but you're not gonna be like, hey,
get them in there and do If they were like
I want.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
To do this, they got to figure it out. Well,
they have to have the talent. Yeah, I can't help
them with that. Hopefully some of it passed the talent.
I'm just like, yeah, are you really honest with your kids?
In general? Uh? In general? Yes, in general, but I'm
(36:36):
not Yeah, I don't. I don't. I don't lie to them,
but I'm not gonna I don't. I'm not gonna try
to crush them. I'm always lift them up.
Speaker 1 (36:45):
Are there any ways that you approach parentsing that are
unlike the ways parents you were parented? So where you're like,
I'm trying to do something different here than my parents had.
Speaker 2 (36:57):
Uh, try to listen? Okay, yeah, I do listen to them,
and I allow them to. Let's let's discuss this, and
you can ask me why I said no. Like growing up,
it was because I said.
Speaker 1 (37:12):
So it which is yeah, it was. I mean, who
knows what way is this? I would say this new
era of parenting that has emerged and in the recent
years will be messed up. But I'm like, this is
so much more lovely. And I'm like, I wish somebody
had asked me, let me have a conversation with them.
But I know it's like nobody wants to be talking
(37:32):
to a little kid. But I'm actually kids have something
to say sometimes they do, yeah, and so giving them
that space, I do agree. I mean, I don't have
kids is important, but I also imagine that at times
It is a test of patience too. It is yes, yeah,
and you approach it with yes. I mean, we're not
going to have a full on you know, you know
(37:54):
what I'm saying. I'm gonna let you get a few questions.
Speaker 2 (37:56):
Off and then that's that's it. That's it.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:01):
I mean everything always leads to because I said so yeah,
well okay, but I first.
Speaker 1 (38:07):
Make you feel like it's not just because I said
but we both know it's because I said so yeah.
Speaker 2 (38:14):
I respect. I don't know. I'm just getting the feeling yeah,
and they're like what, I don't know. I just don't
feel like you should.
Speaker 1 (38:21):
Go yeah oh to parties like that. But also a
parent's intuition though, Yeah, that I'm older, I can have.
I have immense respect for it now because before growing up,
like certain, my mom at times would be like, you're
never sleeping over those people's house again. I'd be like why,
But now I understand. She's like when I want to
drop you off strange folks. Yes, she's still let me
(38:42):
spend the night, though, She's like, I'm willing to gamble,
but not again.
Speaker 2 (38:46):
After this she was probably yeah the whole time, right,
But I'm like the parent's intuition is real. It's real.
I was in college and and we were living in
this house. It was on campus, but you know, all
these roommates. It's like four of us, and we were
getting ready to go to this party. You want to
(39:09):
go leave Hampton and go over to Norfolk to this party.
We were all getting dressed, you know whatever, and Tracy
got a phone call, so she goes pay phone, yo,
Tracy's mom. So Tracey's on the phone with her mom
and she's like, uh huh uh huh okay, yeah, all right.
So she comes back upstairs. She goes, guys, we can't go,
(39:31):
and we were like what. She's like, I just talked
to my mom, and you know, she said, asked what
we were doing. I told we were going out, and
she said she felt something and that we shouldn't go.
And we were like, damn, why did she take that call? Yeah? Yeah,
and we didn't go. You didn't go cause we didn't.
Did we find out that anything happened at no. I
(39:53):
was like, somebody better get shot in Norfolk tonight. I
said it better if we wake up tomorrow morning and
nobody I got showed. I need to talk to your
mom Tracy's out the friend Yeah, out of the friend group.
That's a mess, But it's true though. It's it's it's interesting,
like I.
Speaker 1 (40:12):
Missed a flight recently, and I like to tell myself that.
I'm like, it's because I wasn't supposed to be on
that plane. I was supposed to be on that plane.
Nothing happened on that plane. Girl, you missed your flight,
and doesn't it doesn't have to be that.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
But you know what, it might not have been the flight.
It could have been when you landed at that time,
getting in the car, going to that place, something could
have happened. That is so true. It's true. Are you
a person who believes everything happens for a reason? Yes,
that's true. Yeah I do.
Speaker 1 (40:41):
Have you ever heard people say like, in that reason,
sometimes it's because you're being dumb. I've heard that I
believe everything happens for a reason.
Speaker 2 (40:51):
Yeah, silly to think, no people, Yeah, I've heard people
say that. Yeah. Yeah, I believe I am where I'm
supposed to be. Right. Do you raise your kids with
any sort of faith? You know what? That's the area
that I feel like I'm not gonna say failing at,
but where I need to step up. But there's sixteen now,
(41:13):
so I don't let but I've always, you know, had
we say grace before you know, we eat, and they
see that I go to you know, either go to
church or online church or online church from the company
or bed, praise the Lord from this best. You know
(41:37):
you can order like the little communion. You can't stop it. Yes, yes,
oh you're you can get a little the little thing
and you just right there. Wait a minute, you're serious.
Don't tell me this. Why would you tell me this
because I'm trying to physically, I'm trying to get back
into physically going. Oh, well, you know, definitely, But I'm
the same.
Speaker 1 (41:58):
Good communion from bed and bed is my I have
established here that bed is my favorite place to be
at all times.
Speaker 2 (42:05):
Don't tell me I'm doing communion from bred in the
name of the file son. Wow, okay, it's over. I'm
not stepping foot in another yet. Communion from bed, blessing myself.
Oh wait, okay, so you do all night, but you
don't make that watch with you. No, I don't. I don't.
Here's the thing. Tell me, because you know, my my
(42:29):
church is black. So so I'm like, oh, passala slip
up say slept to day crazy, here's a white So
it's like up, you know, yeah, Wanda, you know what,
(42:50):
But listen, I do get it because everyone, which I
want to say, which he never does, my church is
very loving cour and he's yeah, this is the best
that just in case that one off, get that fear
that maybe this is the one day you make them
sit for church. It's gonna be the days you don't
like what, Yeah, we don't like white people in this house,
(43:10):
pastor what the pastor? We hate to see it because
that would really turn them from God. Yes, and understandably.
Speaker 1 (43:19):
So so what made you not make them besides like
not wanted them to hear the pastor say anything he
hasn't said yet?
Speaker 2 (43:27):
What is what made you not in any way say hey,
we have to do this? Well honestly, Also, I was
also trying to find the church I'm in now, I was,
you know, so I was bouncing around trying to find
it church. I like, so, yeah, I would let them watch.
I would try to get them, you know, I will.
(43:48):
I'm saying, that's what my plan. It's a goal. I
would like to take them physically to the building. Okay,
but we we I have. You're like, was one like
Christmas Eve Mass or whatever? There's a a like a
Unitarian church. I'm like, this is good. It's a good move. Yeah,
(44:11):
so I would take them there. And but for me,
I just I don't feel I don't feel like I've
been to church.
Speaker 3 (44:18):
You know.
Speaker 2 (44:18):
It's like, oh, okay, yeah, actually I took my church,
my son recently the church. What happened about that? Yeah,
on on Fire Island there's an episcopal uh uh church,
but it's held in our community center on Sundays. Right,
So he did he like it? Yeah? He did, Okay,
(44:42):
he did. He was like, all right, that is all right,
But you don't feel the need to in any way
impose faith on them, So you know, I do, but
I want to. And I feel like that's where, you know,
kind of failed. I get what you're saying, but like,
because my parents gave that to me, at least was
there and maybe if I you know, it was kind
(45:03):
of not practicing for you know, for a minute, It's
all it always been there. I could always tap into it, okay,
you know, like if things were like really bad or
I knew I could always tap into that to pull
myself out of you know, or for God to help
me to pull my you know, out of this whatever
thing I was in. So I want them to have that,
(45:26):
to know that that they they there's always a place
they can go. There's always yeah. Yeah, did you ever
flat out reject faith? No?
Speaker 1 (45:35):
No, see neither neither of. I have some friends who
have and then have returned to it. Yeah, But for me,
I'm always like, it's a place for me. You want
to show up and engage with your faith at all
times in a dream perfect world, right, But that's not
how it always goes. And sometimes you're like, oh, I
haven't tapped back in, and I haven't. I haven't felt
as connected to my faith. Yeah, and now I would
(45:57):
like to do that. And you make a point to
or but but I've said to people like, in my
lowest moments, I'm like, I have that thing I could go.
Speaker 2 (46:05):
I know, I know what to reach for.
Speaker 1 (46:08):
And so that's beautiful that you want to give that
to your kids, because it sounds like you feel like
it's a gift to your parents gave you.
Speaker 2 (46:14):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (46:14):
And I have a friend who once said, in terms
of imposing anything on her son, she and her partner
at the time, were like, we want to teach him
something because he's gonna look for something to believe in,
whether you show him the way or not, like people
or people want something to believe I feel.
Speaker 2 (46:34):
So that's beautiful. And so your daughter hasn't been to
church yet, I'm not not without me like that. Okay,
I will. It's gonna happen. I feel it. But say,
but here's the other thing too. I put this back
on on my wife because because when we were because
when they were born, she was so like like focused
(46:54):
in and like hell bent on getting them baptized, like
raised Catholic. So I'm like, okay, so she has the
faith thing. I can roll with this, right, she's I
learned the hell mary things whatever. As long as they
have something, I'm good with this. Yeah, it's the same guy, okay.
(47:16):
And so you know, she did all this and we
went to France, she got them baptized and then that
was it, and you know, and I was like, aren't
you supposed to be like classes? So she's like, oh no,
we we you know, baby, that's too much. That's just
like so there she's there, Catholic by name, Okay, okay,
(47:38):
but she's that way because her her parents didn't really
take them on her own. No no, no, no, no no.
It was kind of like the same way. They were
like baptist and then yeah, okay, wow, all right, and
you had no follow up. It was like there was
(47:58):
a follow up all that you press me to get
them baptized.
Speaker 1 (48:03):
We got to follow the follow because sometimes I think
some people think you just do the thing and then
they're they're good. But they have to have their own,
in my mind, relationship with it right for it to
be to be probably what you want it to be.
Speaker 2 (48:16):
Right. That is really lovely that you said she's got it.
I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (48:22):
I just imagine, like, oh cool, she really cares about yes,
And then you realize up under you're like, wait, no,
you just kind of gave us crazy. That's but you
put it on her, you know, told her business today
and you've blamed her. Is this what being a partner is? Okay,
I'm learning from you. I'm learning from you every step
of the way. I have to ask because I need
(48:47):
advice for life, all right. Your longevity in this industry
that can be very fickle, right, it's hard. It's what
you've done I think is remarkable and how you have
stayed so you and so funny and so relevant all
(49:07):
these years.
Speaker 2 (49:08):
How does one do it? That's oh, this segment is
called that was nice? But what about me? What about me? Okay, okay,
I had one goal right when I started this business.
You know, I even go go further back. I was
(49:29):
working in the government and you know, up at my
job said there. And I was at my job, at
my job at the government job, good job, good job,
good job, And I just knew I wasn't happy, and
I knew it was something else that I was supposed
to be doing. And and I remember everyone saying how
(49:51):
funny I was, and you should be on stage, and
so I was like, okay, you know, I'm gonna try it.
So I did some jokes and I knew immediately like
this is what I wanted to do. So my thing,
it all has al had always been I want to be,
you know, one of the funniest uh comedians, comics, not female, male,
(50:12):
just across the board, period, And that's what that's what
I work towards, and that's what I still work at,
you know, and all everything else kind of just happened
from that, right, I did stand up and I opened
up for Chris Rock when he was doing Bringing the Pain,
he was working on that, he remembered me. So when
(50:34):
he got his show, Hey this is funny comic, started writing, Oh,
so now from my stand up I I'm now writing,
I'm a writer. Okay, cool, but I'm still, you know,
slinging these jokes, still slinging these jokes. And then it's
from from there, Oh, We're gonna put you in front
of the camera. Oh I I guess, you know. And
(50:55):
and that happened because we we had booked a crew
to shoot some things, right and still had like a
couple hours left on the crew. P was a lie,
what y'all got, What y'all got? Come on to shoot something?
It has to be quick. Want to get in front
of this. And we're gonna do a video mama. You're
gonna you know, yeah, so a babysitter. So I'm playing
(51:17):
video mama. So now I'm in front of the camera.
Oh okay, and just things. But it all started from
that one goal, and so I always just go back
to that as far as and that probably is why
I'm still doing stand up. But everything just kind of
fell from that and still just stayed me you know yes.
Speaker 1 (51:39):
And you're very clear in that way. Now, given how
like what you have accomplished in the way we all
see you and the expectation we all have of you,
have you bombed anytime in the last like five years?
Speaker 2 (51:53):
Five years? I'm sure?
Speaker 1 (51:55):
And what does that feel like for you? Being one
of the sex and people come in and like, we
love Wanda, we love Wanda. Wanda is the funniest.
Speaker 2 (52:02):
What does it feel like? Are you? How do you
take BOMBI now, it hurts, it still still hurts. And
usually when it happens, it's ated like some charity event.
You're like, I didn't even have to do I didn't
have to do this ship. I ain't even have to
be just say that on the way out, driping I do.
I'm like, this sucks, man, y'all Like, whoy are y'all
even having comments here? Y'all talking over there? Whatever? Clean
(52:28):
clean click clean?
Speaker 3 (52:31):
You know what?
Speaker 2 (52:31):
Next time, I'm just gonna write a check. Yeah, I'm
gonna write a check. I'm not coming. I'm not coming, y'all.
You guys have been great tonight. You'll tell them you
guys have sucked, ruined. I'm not gonna sleep tonight. Yeah,
this is gonna be on my mind. I'm not gonna
sleep tonight. And are y'all okay with that? Yeah? Wow, yeah,
(52:53):
write a check. Yeah. But you never know which crowd.
Speaker 1 (52:56):
Sometimes they surprise you where you're like, this is not
the crowd that I thought would enjoy this material in
this way or this much. And then the crowds you
think are gonna be great, it's like, yeah, it's the
clink clink, clinking, not paying attention, heckling, huckling.
Speaker 2 (53:11):
You. I think it's lovely that you're telling the truth
on the way out. You don't have to say you
guys have been great. No, you don't have to. You
don't have to okay, and you no, okay and yeah,
or it's especially now you know if there's like somebody
doesn't agree with my politics and they'll start saying something
(53:32):
and they have to argue back whatever, and and it's
it's the thing of I have to really tell myself, Wanda,
don't go ballistic. Just that's one person. Yeah, so now
my security they know they so they just hurt get
that person out, okay, because they're like it'll ugly, it'll
get my head and I just get and I just
(53:52):
turn on everybody read and I don't like, yeah, since
y'all out there sitting out there with that person, you
can to help. Yeah, And then then I go too
far and then it's like, so, oh okay, you know
it's crazy and they're all out there. I saw that, like, no,
(54:13):
we can't move on, No, we can't just move on one.
But that was a lie. You really, yeah, you know what.
Speaker 1 (54:20):
But it's crazy how in life though the psychology of
and it's like evolutionary, evolutionary apparently that to look out
for threats, so like you see one negative comment or
someone one person is engaging with you negatively in the audience.
You could have a crowd of four hundred people and
one person who is like, I don't agree with your
politics and I'm gonna kind of say something about it.
(54:41):
But like, there are three hundred and ninety nine people enjoying,
but you're just like you, I am committed to getting you,
demolishing you, which is like it is it's evolutionary that
we were meant to scan for threats and like address them.
But it's so crazy how we still still we're not
under the same risk atty W one, but our brains
still do that to us, like all this love, but
(55:03):
I need to focus on that one person, that one
person so secure.
Speaker 2 (55:08):
I need to get security. I didn't connect it with
the evolution. Okay, that makes sense a little something. I
might have made it up. No, I did it. I
didn't make that far. I didn't make it up. I
need to get security though, That's what I'm hearing, so
they can address sick security.
Speaker 1 (55:24):
And this person left the nasty comic. Go get him, fine,
I want you to show up to their house and
scare them. I really appreciate you being here, and I
know I've had a selfish moment where I got to
get advice from you. We have a listener who needs advice.
Would you be willing to give them advice as well? Okay, Kevin,
We're ready to hear from them.
Speaker 3 (55:46):
My best friend is engaged to a man that I
literally could not give less of a fuck about. And
I'm afraid that my role as like best friend is
being replaced by this guy that, again I don't even
give a fuck about. Although he didn't vote.
Speaker 2 (56:08):
Call me back. I don't have his number, but didn't vote.
And what he didn't vote? He said?
Speaker 1 (56:13):
The guy didn't vote. He's like, I don't give a
fuck about him, but he didn't vote, and was that it? Yeah,
he's like, oh, he's like, I really don't give a
fuck about him, although he didn't vote. It was just
like one little jab to the man on the way out. Okay,
so what would you say our listener does about this
best friend engaged?
Speaker 2 (56:31):
It was layers to that.
Speaker 1 (56:32):
It's so much there's I wish we could ask follow
up questions, but it's and he said, calling back, but
we don't have his number.
Speaker 2 (56:38):
His best friend is engaged. Look that I have friends
that I'm not really involved with their you know, with
their partner. But it doesn't you know what I'm saying,
Like like, it doesn't mean that that they shouldn't be together.
(57:02):
You know, it's obviously it's something that she gets from
or he or there's the two guys. Okay, it's something
that he gets from this other guy, this from his
partner that makes him happy. Right, So your your thing
is just you're just supposed to be happy for your
friend and make sure your friend is good and maybe
(57:23):
be a situation where it's good that you don't give
a fuck about this guy. Because when your friend sounds
off on him. You could be like that. Yep, I know,
I told you exactly exactly, so you're that sounding board
for for your friends. So just you know, Hey, relationships
(57:44):
are meant for us to work out childhood ship. Basically,
it's yeah, so you roman attract, you end up being
attracted to some body who Uh so you can actually
have adult conversations with someone when you couldn't you know,
(58:10):
have that conversation as a child.
Speaker 1 (58:12):
I've heard this sounds like relationships are just your re
enacting childhood in any ways.
Speaker 2 (58:17):
Yeah, but but as an adult now you get to
speak as an adult, Yes, with some you know, so
with some agency. So I think he should just status.
You know, maybe maybe he got a good dick and
that's that's all. And you don't want you don't know,
you don't know what friend's vote could be, right, just
(58:39):
what I'm saying, it could be. He's like you think
I'm talking to him. We don't. We ain't talk. We
don't talk. We're just I'm just trying to lock this
dick up. The pipe is getting late. I'm not worried
about it. Have you hang out with and do culture
ship and vote? I don't need to you think I'm
(59:00):
watching PBS with this molefu. You know what?
Speaker 1 (59:06):
That is so valid because also the listener said, I
don't give a fuck about I couldn't care less about.
But I'm like, sounds like you don't like him first
of all, but she keeps it out, so you're you
have to call it what it is. I think you
don't like him. It's it's giving out a link and
then the little dig at the end, and he didn't vote,
but he might have a good dick and that might
be all.
Speaker 2 (59:24):
Your friend is looking for at this stage in their
life life. Yeah, that's true. You know what. That is valid.
Speaker 1 (59:29):
And I hadn't even considered because because every once in
a while you will see a couple together you won't
even know if the other person is a good person
or not, or they're voted or not whatever, and you're like,
that is an interesting match. But somebody's got some good genitals.
That's often what it is.
Speaker 2 (59:45):
You are so right. Let me think about that next
time I see a mismatched couple. Yeah, I'm doing something.
Speaker 1 (59:52):
Somebody's doing something different. Wanda, thank you so much for
being here. I really appreciate you. Best wishes on the tour.
Speaker 2 (01:00:01):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (01:00:02):
I pray nobody makes you see red. Nobody does that,
and if they do, security gets them morning. Okay, But
come on, t I I feel like he owns that word.
Thank you so much, really appreciate you. I'm so glad
you could be.
Speaker 2 (01:00:21):
Here with you. All right, folks, Folks, what where am
I from?
Speaker 1 (01:00:31):
We've established that I'm from Maryland. We don't really say
that word. I guess I can't speak for everyone. Their
point is I just talked to Wanda Sykes.
Speaker 2 (01:00:38):
That was very fun.
Speaker 1 (01:00:39):
I love the Maryland specifics of that conversation. Many of
you may not like it, but guys, that's okay. And
I often talk about things people like and don't like
on this podcast, and I'm here to say it whatever,
it's okay, dog. I loved that conversation. She was so insightful,
so funny, and getting to hear her talk about her
children and savage ways was quite delightful for me. You know,
(01:01:03):
what I didn't get to talk to her about is
Instagram use and how she feels about memes and reels.
But if I were to guess, I think she ain't
got time for that when we're talking about our patients, right.
I have a feeling she doesn't have the patience for
endless reels and memes and tiktoks all day.
Speaker 2 (01:01:21):
That was the sense I got.
Speaker 1 (01:01:22):
I don't want to pin that on Wanda, but just
a hunch. I'm intuitive, you see, like a parent. Anyway,
if you want advice from me and my guest, next guest,
some guest, please, I'm begging you. I'm begging you to
call us and leave a voicemail at five O two
eight four nine three two three seven. I remember the number.
(01:01:46):
There's no teleprompter, baby, that's just right up here. Okay,
five O two eight four nine three two three seven.
That's five O two Thanks TCHX.
Speaker 2 (01:01:55):
Dad's more than one.
Speaker 3 (01:01:57):
Bye.
Speaker 2 (01:01:58):
Thanks Dad.
Speaker 1 (01:01:58):
Is a production of Will Ferrell's Big Money Players in
iHeart Podcasts. I'm your host Ago wodem Our producer is
Kevin Bartelt, and our executive producer is Matt Appadaka.
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