August 12, 2024 • 42 mins
Morgan brings on two guests this week. First she interviews neuroscientist Nicole Vignola. Nicole shares how to keep your brain healthy, and how to challenge it. She debunks the theory that some people are left brain or right brain. Morgan learns the brain is plastic and you can learn to become different things, plus we've been wired to eat bad foods, and a neuroscientist's breakup protocol. Then Morgan's personal trainer and good friend Jarrod Houston stops by to talk physical health. He also gets very vulnerable about working as a strengthening coach at UNLV while being homeless, and being diagnosed with Bipolar disorder.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Personally with Morgan Julesman.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Welcome friends. I am super excited about this episode.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
It's Morgan here, and I hope each episode of Take
This Personally so far has helped you either learn things
about yourself or helped you in whatever season of life
you may be in. This week, I have on expert Nicole,
who is a neuroscientist and incredibly well versed in all
things brain health. Then I'm bringing on my good friend
(00:42):
Jared Houston, who shared the ups and downs of his
life journey that got him to where he is today
as a celebrity personal trainer, author and business owner. I
(01:07):
am so excited to welcome Nicole on with us right now.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Nicole, how are you today?
Speaker 4 (01:12):
I am great. Thank you very much for having me.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
I'm so excited because you are a neuroscientist, you have
a master's in organizational psychology, and you're a personal coach,
which is so many titles and just totally awesome.
Speaker 4 (01:27):
Thank you, that's really kind. Thank you so much for
having me. I'm so excited for this.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
With all of those titles, you have some incredible knowledge
and I want to start with something super easy just
to kick it off, and we're going to talk about
the basics of brain health. So how would you know
if your brain is healthy and happy versus kind of
living in a state of turmoil or chaos per se.
Speaker 4 (01:48):
Well, that's hard to answer because it depends on whether
you have stuff going on. But I always say that
you know, a lot of individuals will work on their
mental health, but then they won't be working on their
brain health. So it's quite hard to sort of be
cognit natively there if you will or happy, if you're
not getting sleep, and if you're not hydrating correctly, if
you're not exercising. So provided you've got all of those
(02:08):
things ticked off and your mental health is still not great,
then you can start thinking, Okay, maybe there's something in
your life that's troubling you or you've got a lot
of stress. But ticking off the basics means that then
your brain can do what it needs to and those
are things like sleep, those are things like nutrition, hydration,
and exercise. And you know, we don't have to go
crazy with all these things either. I post about exercise,
(02:29):
and I think some people get a bit triggered thinking,
you know, like you have to do a marathon running
you don't have to you know, you can go for
a walk something as profound, it's just going for a
walk and be so beneficial for your brain.
Speaker 3 (02:38):
Yeah, And I was going to ask you about that,
because we know exercise is good for many things, not
just brain health, but health in general. And like you mentioned,
it doesn't have to be anything crazy. What are some
other activities that we can do on top of exercising
that are good for your brain health.
Speaker 4 (02:54):
Yeah. So, I mean exercise is great because I always
try and post about reasons to exercise that are not
just associated to weight loss. I think when people hear
the word exercise, they automatically think lose weight, But there's
so much more to that. Exercise increases something called BDNF,
which is brain derived neurotrophic factor. It is essentially a
protein or a molecule that helps strengthen the synapses in
(03:15):
your brain. So they actually looked at post mortem brains
of older individuals, and the ones that stayed active actually
had more proteins in the synapses, meaning that the cognition
was more integral, their synapses were stronger. Now, it's hard
to imagine having synapses that are strong because we can't
see them, but if you think about a muscle being strong,
you think about your bones being strong, having more bone density.
(03:36):
It's the same thing as happening in your brain with
brain derived neurotrophic factors. It's actually literally solidifyingly synapses so
that we can maintain cognition. Another thing about exercise is
that with resistance, exercise especially increases something called IGF one
into growth like factor one, and that is extremely beneficial
in maintaining cognition as well. So I always encourage everyone
(03:58):
to exercise for those reasons, because longevity is anchored in
what we do right now with our life, you know,
with our habits and our health and just small things. Again,
it doesn't need to be crazy stuff.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
As if mental health physical health aren't enough, do it
for your brain health too.
Speaker 4 (04:14):
Yeah, and it all goes hand in hand. I mean,
it's all tied together. You know, when you exercise, you
release and dolphins, you feel good. No one regrets an exercise.
I appreciate that some people, you know, find that a
bit daunting of a stressful. I get a lot of
people that say that actually causes them anxiety, and I
can completely sort of resonate for that because I think
we are in a culture that encourages exercise from a
weight loss perspective. And we have so many social media
(04:36):
influences that you know, look great and you know people
probably feel intimidated, and I understand. But there's so many hobbies.
There's so many things you can do that don't need
to be like going to the gym and lifting. It
could be you know, walking or yoga. Even meditating is
so good for b the enough it's taking up a sport.
Swimming you don't even have to talk to anyone when
you're swimming. Your ears are literally underwater.
Speaker 3 (04:56):
Yeah, exactly, I love those. Those are some you know,
other active you can do. Is there anything outside of
exercise that you're like, make sure you're doing this for
your brain health? Exercise is really important. What's kind of
some other ones there?
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (05:08):
I think the key to keeping brain health is staying active,
so not just physically, but mentally as well. So continue
to learn new things, continue to stay engaged with life.
I know that jobs can get very stressful, and I
think we all saw it through the lockdown, you know,
when we're in these confined spaces and people having to
live in maybe not such happy homes or maybe just
seeing the same thing every day. It's taxing on the
(05:30):
brain and we do see it in research and especially
in mice experiments. When you put them in an environment
that is monotonous and that is not joyful, they will
dispense drugs if they are available. But the drug is
available even if they are in an environment that is happy,
and they choose not to dispense drugs, So the choice
is always there. The environment as well keeps them happy,
so staying engaged with life, so finding a hobby. And
(05:52):
we see this in all the individuals who maintain volunteering
jobs or hobbies or continue to socialize with friends. They
live more prosperous lives and that is linked to b
D and F when we are learning. When we continue
to learn, we continue to change our brain to sort
of it's almost like not letting it stagnate, if you will,
And that is because of b D and F. When
we learn, we increase b D and F as well.
(06:13):
So I actually get all my clients to do some
ball training games, or I encourage them to use the
opposite hand. So try and brush your teeth with your
left hand if you're right handed, or the other hand
if you're left handed. It's really hard, and it's actually
really challenging. So just taking your mind and your brain
sort of places where it's not comfortable will mean that
it has to drive BDNF and then in turn keep
(06:33):
you integrity.
Speaker 3 (06:34):
I mean, I took up adult gymnastics at twenty eight,
and I felt really good about that. But now I
want to brush my teeth with my left hand because
that sounds even more challenge people.
Speaker 4 (06:44):
That ask me questions what the best way to keep
my brain health that the cheapest cost is just hydrating
consistently literally hydrating water, because I found it's quite crazy.
But there's a lot of people that don't drink a
lot of water throughout the day. I clients that only
drink coffee and tea in the evening. It's very brittle,
and I was say, no, no, no, You've got to drink water.
There's ball through in my coffee and I'm thinking, no,
you have to drink water.
Speaker 3 (07:05):
Well, I will say I am one of those people.
For whatever reason, I my taste buds hate water. I
do my best, though, to still force myself to drink
water because I do know I feel better when I.
Speaker 4 (07:15):
Could you put electrolyteses. You can afford electrolytes, pop them
in and then you've got a flavored water.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
So yes, I do meo mio is my like go
to toys, just sported in and it makes me drink
more water.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
So I found the little cure perfect.
Speaker 4 (07:29):
And if it's got electrolytes, and then it's even better
because your synapses communicate through sodium potassium pump, which is
literally sodium potassium communicating through a membrane, and that's how
we generate energy to spike in action potential, which then
sends the information to another sign apps you see. So
something as simple as ingesting electrolytes can help maintain cognition
and brain help.
Speaker 3 (07:49):
I love when we find out that we're doing good things.
It's wromally find now we're doing bad things. I'm really
excited when I find.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Out I did look good.
Speaker 3 (07:56):
It's actually true that different parts of our brain trigger
different things. You know, they talk about the right brain
and the left brain and creativity versus analytical. Is that
something that's actually true or is that something that just
kind of came out into the universe.
Speaker 4 (08:10):
It came out into the universe with good reason, but
we disprove it. If you will so the left side
of the brain and the right side of brain both
work together in language, so they used to think that
the left side was more logical. I think it's that
way around that. I don't even know anymore because I
know that it's not that way. So I think the
left side they believe was more logical was because it
dealt with language. But actually the right hand side helps
put the sentence together, so it puts sort of context
(08:33):
to the message, whereas a left side just sort of
picks up on the actual words. But no, we don't
have a sort of left brain right brain dominancy. But
with that being said, the left side of the brain
does control the right and the right does control the left.
So if you're right handed and you use your right
hand more, you might be using it a bit more
of your left hand side. But the brain is always
going to maximize itself, and it's always going to make
(08:54):
sure that it's using one hundred percent of its energy.
And the other myth is that we use ten percent
of our brains. That's not true. We use it. The
brain will maximize itself where it can. So creativity and
logical thinking actually come from two separate networks. One network
for creativity is called the default mode network. It's a
network of three brain areas and actually form a triangle
(09:14):
sort of like here in the frontal lobes and then
down to the side and then sort of back together. Okay,
so you can see it now on both sides, and
that's responsible for mind wandering sometimes rumination as well, but
that creativity and individuals who have a higher connectivity in
that system are able to siphon memories and use them
as inspiration, which someone like me will probably lack a
little bit of, although I'm a little bit creative, but
(09:36):
it can be trained. The brain is classic, so it
can be trained. You can become more creative, you can
become more logical. The logic network of the brain is
also on both sides. It's called the central executive network.
So that's cognitively demanding tasks, problem solving, and there will
be higher connectivity in the frontal lobes because that's where
your conscious sort of decision making comes from.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
Wow, that is fascinating, especially to learn the myths that
we learned thanks to the Internet, but thank you for
debunking some of those for us. It sounds like we
can use all of our brains to unlock some new
potential because it's constantly learning.
Speaker 4 (10:09):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2 (10:10):
You often talk.
Speaker 3 (10:11):
About rewiring the subconscious part of our brains.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
You know, why would.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
Someone need to do this or want to do this?
What does that kind of look like?
Speaker 4 (10:20):
So I get a lot of clients that sort of
come to me and they say, I have these thoughts,
I have these negative thoughts, and they're purely based on
or they have negative ideas about themselves, and they normally
based on either what their parents did said or what
friends around them said while they were growing up. Observational
knowledge is fantastic because we can learn how to get
to school with our parents without paying attention, right, But
(10:41):
we also see how they interact in the world and
we learn from them. So a lot of my clients
will have picked up habits from their parents that they
wish they didn't have, and I think a lot of
people can resonate with that, and a lot of people
are trying to sort of break those patterns as well.
Whether that's true or not, there are other ways that
that can manifest itself. So maybe you have bad experiences,
you have trauma, but you have these deeply ingrained memories
(11:03):
that are integrated into your behavior in your subconscious if
you will so, ninety percent of our brains, around ninety
percent is subconscious. Ten percent is your conscious thought. Now,
what I mean by that is when you pick up
your toothbrush, you start brushing your teeth with your right
hand side right. You don't even think about that, You
just do it. It's automatic. When you sort of scope
out the world, your brain is constantly matching images with
(11:23):
what it already knows and telling your basil ganglia, which
is a part of the brain stemp that everything is fine.
If something is out of place, if something is new,
or there's a car driving down a one way or
on a pavement, that's when the image doesn't make sense
to your brain, and that's when it alert your conscious
brain to do something about it. And that same thing
happens with behaviors. So little pattern, little messages that we
(11:45):
tell ourselves, little negative thoughts, automatic reactions. Especially my women
clients will look in the mirror and automatically think that
they don't look good. Those are the subconscious thoughts and
pattern that we want to break. We want to change
them because a they are not true, and if they
are true, we can work on them.
Speaker 3 (11:59):
So that's something you work with clients to help them
rewire their brain.
Speaker 4 (12:03):
Yes, that is essentially what I do. We also look
at brain performance, so depending on who the client is
and depending on what they want to do. But I
would say maybe eight and a half times out of
ten people have something that they want to change when
it comes to thought processing.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
That's really cool to hear that that's something we have
access to do.
Speaker 4 (12:18):
Yeah, the brain is plastic. The brain can change in
it pretty much almost anyway, of course, depending on how
much attention and intention we put in and depending you know,
there are some genetic factors of course as well. It
might inhibit us, but we can always sort of get
better and work with what we've got as well.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
Mental health is a hot topic right now, which is
awesome that people want to share more about it. But
there is a difference from my understanding, between adaptational mental
health and people who have mental health diseases.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
Is that correct?
Speaker 1 (12:45):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (12:46):
Can you explain that?
Speaker 3 (12:47):
Because I know on the internet they kind of all
get looped together and we think because we have one,
we may have a disease.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
But that's not necessarily the case.
Speaker 4 (12:53):
Not necessarily the case, and I encourage anyone who might
sort of pick up on what I'm about to say
to pay attention. And I think important thing and these
things is to not self diagnose. If you think that
you have a mental health disorder or disease, to go
and see a professional. Now, disease or disorder is on
a spectrum, right. You can go through a period of
depression that is real, that is true, that is but
(13:14):
not necessarily have the clinical sort of atiology for disorder.
For that disorder, it might be temporary, it might be circumstantial,
it might be due to a chronic information in the system.
So you're going through a very stressful period. You are
susceptible to chronic inflammation, and chronic inflammation is one of
the biggest contributors to depressive symptoms. But that can change. Now.
(13:34):
It's hard for me to obviously give out universal advice
on a podcast because I don't know who the listeners are,
But of course there are there are spectrums to it,
you know, And I think we are uncovering a lot
about depression and other brain health disorders that I'm hopeful
for the future in you know, mental health.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
That's a really exciting thing to hear too. The fact
that we just keep advancing in technology and knowledge puts
us on a better track.
Speaker 4 (13:56):
Yeah, and the fact that we're talking about it, that's
cathartic and itself. I mean, I went on Alive with
someone at doctor Carol and Boyd and she was talking
about how actually we have this ability to self heal
and she was talking about it from a traumatic site
because she deals with trauma. Because she was saying that
talking to friends, talking to family, talking to loved ones
is already going to start the process of you healing,
(14:17):
and it is within yourself. Is a doctor in America,
Bruce D. Perry. He's amazing. I love him. He's a
child psychiatrist and he always says that I've read a
couple of his books that the children that he deals with,
the ones that are placed in loving homes or have
a good network around them of supportive friends, family, the
relative maybe even parents, they are the ones that will
thrive and get through in Okay. So human connection and
(14:40):
just being able to confide in someone can already be
so healing for the individual.
Speaker 3 (14:44):
And that's you know, why I started this podcast was
to ensure that we feel more connected to people and
less alone in what's happening in our lives.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Yeah, I'm glad to hear that.
Speaker 3 (14:55):
Even if you know, maybe somebody didn't get that as
a child, maybe they're getting it now even a little
bit through this podcast.
Speaker 4 (15:00):
One hundred percent, and it can change. And also I
did a little bit of a deep delve and there's
not that much research around this, but I actually started
sort of doing a bit of sort of research in
asking people and having a pen pal. You know, an
online friend can be just as therapeutic as having an
in person friend. You know, obviously there are benefits to
having someone there and you know, the touch, the sensation
is nice, but having a pen pal or someone online
(15:23):
can be just as useful. So I know that there's
a lot of people that struggle with loneliness. But the
good news is that we can reach out to the
internet for help.
Speaker 2 (15:30):
The good side of the internet.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
The whole idea that your mind plays tricks on you,
is that an actual.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
Truth saying or is that also something we made?
Speaker 4 (15:39):
Have No, so we have a negativity bias. We are
more susceptible to thinking negatives. So they did this in
studies of economics and it's called loss of versions. So
if you receive three nice comments on your Instagram, would
you receive one nasty one, You'll most likely go to
bed worrying about the nasty one instead of remembering the
three nice ones. Right, that's a negativity bias. So the
(16:00):
ratio is about two and a half three to one.
Then we have this limbic system, which is your emotional brain,
and then we have sort of logic brain, which is
your executive function, which is sort of putting you in
logical thinking. So you know, when you're hungry and you're
literally hungry, it's the thing. It's your emotional brain talking,
and then you're eating, you're like, I'm so sorry, I
(16:21):
don't know I said that.
Speaker 3 (16:22):
And I know that's all too well, way too well.
Speaker 4 (16:25):
Same. So, yes, our anxious brain or our emotional brain
will make us believe things that are not necessarily true. Okay,
and there might be some element to that. So what
I always say to my client is write it down,
write it down, make a list, because that's going to
activate your logical thinking. Now you start writing it down,
now you can start seeing it on paper from a
different perspective, from a logical perspective. Then you can start
(16:47):
assessing is this actually real. You know, these things that
I'm saying to myself they true. Okay, fine, maybe they are,
but we can change them.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
Right.
Speaker 4 (16:54):
If we can't, then we need to find a way
to work through them. But most of the time, people
they over sort of how they actually feel about themselves
until they actually start talking to me and they're like, oh, actual, yeah,
maybe it wasn't that bad. You know, there is definitely
a thing. And that's not to sort of discount anyone's
anxiety to say that it's not real, but that is
to say that, you know, we do have this emotional
(17:15):
brain that talks to us quite often.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
Gosh, they're dang emotional brain. I think it gets us
more than we think.
Speaker 4 (17:21):
Especially if you are sort of in survival mode, if
you are highly strung, highly stressed, you know, your brain
is going to be operating to just keep you alive,
and that is an emotional thing, right, So you're going
to be triggered much easier. You're going to be emotional
much easier. There's a you know, we can see why
people suffer so much with these thoughts, these intrusive thoughts
and depressive symptoms as well, and it's a real hole
(17:43):
to get out of sometimes, and anyone that can and
has they should really thank themselves because it's so hard
to get yourself out of that dip back out and like, okay,
I'm actually okay now.
Speaker 3 (17:53):
If anyone who just heard her say that, if you've
come out of that, definitely celebrate yourself because that's the accomplishment.
Speaker 4 (17:59):
It's yeah, exactly, and on a neurobiological level, it is
a whole. You know, your monoamines, your dopamine, europeneffron, serotonin,
they're all low. We don't know exactly, and I think
a lot of people probably read the paper about the
serotonin theories, but there is a mona amine theory around depression.
And we know that when our motivations low, dopamine's low
nor open efron is low. So to get to boost
(18:20):
those things, we normally have to do things to get
us out of those holes. But that's the catch twenty two,
isn't it. Because the thing that's going to make you
feel good is getting out of it, is going for
a run, is you know, speaking to someone. But those
things in itself can be so challenging because sometimes just
reaching out to someone can feel so hard.
Speaker 3 (18:37):
It's almost more important to do that when you don't
feel like doing it. You also posted something on Instagram
that was really interesting to me and shout out your
Instagram real quick.
Speaker 4 (18:46):
Thank you. It's Nicole's neuroscience. So pretty simple.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
Nicole's Neuroscience, so much great content there.
Speaker 3 (18:52):
You had posted something about how every decade we lose
like five to ten percent.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
It makes it harder for us to be motivated to
do things. Yeah, we talk about that a little bit.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
Yes, so we lose dopamine. We lose about five to
ten percent. Now, the caveat is that we do need
to keep moving to keep that dopamine up. So that's why,
you know, you hear about older people that want to
exercise and they can't do it, it's because they don't
have that motivation. They also take less risks. That's one
of the reasons why we motivate DOPAMINEA is your motivation.
You're a transmitter, not necessarily the reward neure a transmitter,
(19:23):
so making sure that you stay active, keeping those dopamine
levels up is extremely important and making sure that we're
buffering the amount that we're losing, because we will lose
dopamine levels. Of course, that is just the nature of
the aging brain. But it's how much we can soften
the blow if you will.
Speaker 3 (19:39):
You also mentioned how the cells in our body are
constantly regenerating based on the things we put into our body,
and I think that's interesting because there's a lot of
discussion about the food, about things that are going on
inside those foods that we're putting inside our bodies. So
in a perfect world, what are some things that we
would need to keep away from from like putting inside
(20:01):
our bodies.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
So we don't know. Deal with this is bad.
Speaker 4 (20:03):
I always say if it has packaging and an advertisement
and you can't if it has packaging it and you
can't get it in its truest form, I would probably
try and limit it. Okay, anything with an advertisement is
probably a no no. If it has an advertisement it's
in a bag of peas, that's different because you can
get that in its truest form. I get asked about oats.
Of course, you can get oats in their truest form,
but normally, if you can't find the product in its
(20:26):
truest form, then stay away. Ultra process foods, ultra process sugar,
fizzy drinks not water, but you know, sodas and stuff
like that. I mean, they have so many added I
mean I went by barbecue sauce the other day because
we wanted to make pulled pork, and ironically, I saw
the one on the shelf that was going to look
the healthiest, And when I got home, my boyfriend was like,
oh my gosh, it was like reading out all these
things and all these e numbers and we were like,
(20:48):
no way, it would just put us straight in the
bin because it's not worth it. So if the label
has loads of ingredients in it, I would question that.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
Okay, that's good to know and something I've been trying
to adapt in my diet. But I also, you know,
I know how hard that is when we get used
to a certain lifestyle.
Speaker 4 (21:03):
One hundred percent. And the thing is, there's research to
show that individuals that eat ultra process diets actually consume
five hundred canaries more per day than individuals who don't,
even though both groups report the same levels of satiety
and the same level of enjoyment in their food. So
that is just the neurons in your stomach that have
adapted to pick up these particular foods. That is your
(21:24):
brain telling you that you're craving these foods, but over
time it will stop doing that. And you know, when
you start eating batty studying healthy, you'd actually stop craving
those kinds of foods. And those foods are designed to
do that to you. Okay. So I don't want anyone
that's listening to this to feel bad about themselves because
they eat ultra process foods. That is literally the marketing
scheme that they implemented on us. They knew exactly what
they were doing. So it's about stepping away from that
(21:47):
and knowing that those foods are there to trick you
into eating them, and there's nothing wrong with you. That
is just how they are designed.
Speaker 3 (21:53):
Please remember that everyone. I'm going to remember that. I
need to take that with me every day. One other
thing I want to talk to you about. I also
saw on your Instagram page you had a breakup protocol
by a neuroscientist. Yeah, and I would love for you
to kind of explain that situation that you had posted about,
because you know, we often hear about people getting out
of relationships and breakups are really hard.
Speaker 4 (22:14):
Breakups are really hard. Breakups are so hard, you know,
and they send you into a spiral. I mean, you
can get depressive symptoms, feelings of suicide. And that is
because you have been used to having this person in
your life all the time. Okay, so your brain has
rewired itself to be able to reach out for this
person anytime it wanted to to speak to that person.
So on a biological level, your brain has rewired itself
(22:37):
to know that that person is there. When that person
gets cut off, it's extremely difficult for the brain to
comprehend that it will diminish serotonin. There's other dopamine factors
as well, So if all of that can be very confusing,
can be very very painful. Again, the good news is
that the brain can change and actually we adapt from
our experiences. So usually what happens is the second time
(22:59):
around we become one, we either don't open up it
was easy, or we know how to deal with it
better because we've been through it before. Right, So I
think for myself, especially, my second breakup wasn't nearly as
difficult as maybe my first one. My third one was
because that one was a very traumatic one. But anyway,
so different situation. Yeah, exactly so, and that's the other
thing you have to says, you know, how traumatic was
(23:20):
a relationship because trauma bonding in itself is so deeply ingrained.
You know what happens is you have these periods of
you know, where someone makes you feel rubbish and then
that sort of dips you a little bit, and then
the reward feels so much bigger because now they're nice
to you, they promise they're never going to do it again,
and that reward actually strengthens the synapses even more because
there's more going on in the brain instead of a
(23:41):
sort of steady state relationship. Does that make sense, Yeah,
it does, And I think a lot of people can
resonate with that because it's the real thing, and it's
really hard to get out of so rewiring your brain
to imagining your life without that person sort of waking
up and just saying to your brain, hey, this person
is not here anymore and it sucks, but it's okay,
because so we're going to be okay, we're going to
learn from this, and it's going to be all gravy.
(24:03):
So that's where visualization comes in, and it is extremely
important because it does actually work. It does help in
teaching us that that person's not there anymore. Engaging activities
are going to make us happy. So help us rewire
our brains. You know, most people will take up a
hobby like gymnastics, I took up ballet or yoga, or
they'll do something crazy with their hair. That's because they
are longing for change. And I said to you earlier,
(24:23):
when we are changing, we're increasing BD and F. If
we can increase B, D and F, we are priming
our brain for change, which means that we can get
over the breakup quicker. Okay, because our brain is now
primed for rewiring.
Speaker 2 (24:34):
I love that. I never knew why I suggested it
to people.
Speaker 3 (24:37):
I have been through enough breakups in my life that
one of the things I realized is learning something new
at least distracted me from what was going on. I
never realized that it was actually my brain was wanting
me to do that.
Speaker 4 (24:48):
Yeah, it's sort of saying like we want B D
and F, we want to rewire. I mean, I don't
know if it's saying that. It's not very scientific for
me to say that, but.
Speaker 2 (24:56):
It totally is.
Speaker 4 (24:57):
I'm putting a narration on my brain that well.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
Thank you so much again for joining me today talking
with me about all things brain health and just the
brain in general. It's one of those things that I
would love to learn so much more about.
Speaker 2 (25:10):
I don't think you can ever get enough knowledge about
the brain.
Speaker 4 (25:13):
Yes, we'll have to do another one, but thank you
so much for having me. Morganis with in Brilliant.
Speaker 3 (25:17):
If you want to connect with Nicole, purchase her new
book or see more of her work, follow her on
Instagram at Nichole's Neuroscience. Now, I've got Jared Houston on
(25:42):
who is a personal trainer. Not only is he my
personal trainer, but he has trained artists like Kane Brown,
Morgan Wallen Diplow, and many others. While he's incredible at
this job, he also has a lot of life experiences
and been on quite the journey to get him where
he is today.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
How are you How are you feeling?
Speaker 1 (26:01):
I'm nervous. They didn't get to hear the pep talk before.
What wasn't a pep talk? Yeah, let's do this.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
I'm sorry that you're nervous.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
I'm like, I haven't been nervous in a long time.
I'm nervous.
Speaker 3 (26:11):
I had a neuroscientist on before you and we were
talking about the basics of brain health. Being a personal trainer,
why do you feel it's so important for people to
move their bodies and work out.
Speaker 5 (26:23):
Often, Well, the science you work out, you got endo
fins you release for the brain to relax, and it does.
It puts you in a different state. So it is
the goal is to move at least thirty minutes a day.
Speaker 3 (26:34):
What have you seen with personal training people when they
come into you versus when they leave you?
Speaker 2 (26:40):
What is that experience like?
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Well, it just depends on what type of person there are.
Speaker 5 (26:44):
There are different types of people, right, So some people
are just results based. So when you get those people,
those are more like my higher analytical people, like I'm
here for this amount of time and they're a little
harder to grow. But at the end of the day
they realize they have gained tools and resources to become better.
Speaker 1 (27:00):
So I think they leave me better.
Speaker 2 (27:01):
I hope they do. I can attest to that.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
I hope they do.
Speaker 4 (27:05):
So.
Speaker 5 (27:05):
Yeah, when they start out, I think everyone has a
goal or something in mind, but it shifts and changes
to where I try to preach or push a lifestyle change.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
You've been trying to do that with me for over
three years.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
Jeez, I know, right, We're.
Speaker 3 (27:17):
Working on that, but there's so much more to you
than personal training. That was the easiest question you were
going to have today. You've gone through so much in
your life, and this is why I think it's important
to share your story. At one of those points in
your life, you dealt with homelessness.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
Can you talk about that a little bit and what
that was like for you?
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Started marchha twenty fourth, two thousand and seven.
Speaker 5 (27:39):
I was doing a lot of bad things and one
day I just decided to stop. Actually, I felt God
stopped everything. A month later, I lost everything, so I
didn't have anything. I was training about twenty two kids
from a private school, so the parents loved me. I
was living on couches. Sometimes I was in my car.
I was just all over the place. I think about
(27:59):
it now, how many people open their doors to me?
Speaker 1 (28:02):
It was tough.
Speaker 5 (28:02):
I don't think anybody ever knew that I was struggling,
but yeah, it was hiding. It was the hardest. So
when I see a kid i'm working with, like, hey man,
I'm living upstairs and you're loft, which was literally.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
Like a mansion.
Speaker 5 (28:15):
It was a mansion, but I was always uncomfortable because
I didn't want to be in someone else's space. I
didn't want to be overbearing or I just didn't want
to be a nuisance. So I never really felt I
felt like a nomad. And then once I realized that
it might be a while for me to kind of
get on my feet, then I took a job in Vegas,
and then I ended up almost out there too.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
What was the job you took in Vegas?
Speaker 1 (28:37):
I was a strength coach with UNLV. I had a
training company.
Speaker 5 (28:40):
I was making pretty good money with people, but I
was still struggling back and forth, and I applied for
like sixty something jobs, never got one. And then one
of my fraternity brothers like, hey, man, I know a
guy in Vegas that's coaching at UNLV. And I called
him really good dude, and he was like, all right,
we'll give you a teen wig deal. Promise me mills
and a room and board and all that. Then when
I get there, I spent everything. I just thought of
(29:01):
one way ticket. I got out there. It was nothing
like you said. The meals that I had were the
meals that were left over that I was with breakfast
sandwich is from the kids. It was the late night
meals from that I was actually staying with someone for
about two weeks, who was a real good guy, and
I realized it was putting pressure on him and his
now his wife, and so I told him that I
got a place. And I was sneaking in and out
(29:23):
of the school every single night, and I was sleeping
on a cot in the weight room making sure I
was up and out about four point thirty.
Speaker 1 (29:29):
So nobody knew.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
What was that turning point for you?
Speaker 3 (29:33):
After that job and you were dealing with it still,
then when was the turning point that you finally could
look at yourself and say, I wasn't homeless anymore.
Speaker 5 (29:41):
When I came back, Laura and I had we were married.
She was living in an airbnb. It was like a
hundred square feet. I realized that it was not a
good situation because we're married and we can't even connect
because we have to tire trumble bed together with a
jump rope that I had. So I never really even thought.
I thought that was life is what's going to be.
(30:01):
We just got to make the best of it. But
I didn't really think that until I got my job
in about a year and a half and put a
bid on a house.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
Well she did, because I didn't have any type of credit.
I couldn't even buy a piece of bubble go, let
alone finance that pack of goal.
Speaker 5 (30:18):
But I still never felt complete because it I didn't
wasn't I wasn't a part of it.
Speaker 1 (30:23):
I was just in the room.
Speaker 5 (30:24):
I still had the homeless mindset, so I was living
with a roof over my head. After that time, everything
was in her name, like I was never truly a man.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
I still felt homeless. I've never told anybody that.
Speaker 3 (30:35):
Well, I didn't mean to make you share something that
was hard, but I think it's important for people to
hear because who you are today is this incredible person,
and even then you were still probably that, but you
were dealing with so many things that it shows the
journey to where you are now that you're training some
massive celebrities, but you were even working on a football
(30:56):
team and it still wasn't all that pretty.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
I look at that life story for you.
Speaker 3 (31:00):
Do you look back on it and appreciate what you
went through to get to where you are now, or
is it still something that's really hard for you to
be like I needed to.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
Go through that.
Speaker 5 (31:08):
It's still really hard because nobody I talked to the
coach a few weeks ago, and he never knew. I
couldn't tell my wife, she didn't even know. I'm just
in Vegas, floating like I don't know what's going on.
But it was coming back to those kids and serving
those kids and realizing like it was bigger than me.
But it's still hard to deal with because you always
(31:29):
like an investment you want to see, you want to
see ROI sometimes I don't see that return on that
investment that I did. I feel like I short changed
her because she was here working and taking care of everything,
and I was there simply struggling. But I was still
trying to find my way. So that's a double edged
sword right there. I'm still struggling with that.
Speaker 3 (31:49):
No, I don't think anything says that you will never
have to not struggle with that. That's the beauty of
understanding our journeys that we've gone on. So I appreciate
you sharing that story with us. Hopefully some people can
connect to that. One. I do want to also talk about.
You are diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Is that something that
(32:09):
has impacted you throughout that journey and still impacts you today?
Speaker 2 (32:14):
How does that look for you?
Speaker 5 (32:15):
This is the scariest crap I've ever been through in
my life, my whole life. Everybody's saying, thirty nine years,
it's just Jared, I've never really known what the heck
is going on. And finally I was actually with my
writing coach and I was writing some stuff in a
free write and she was like, Jared, you should probably
go talk to somebody. And I was like, no, I'm good.
(32:37):
It's just me, like I'm just I'm good.
Speaker 1 (32:39):
I'm good.
Speaker 5 (32:39):
And it got to a point to where I couldn't
do anything.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
I was frozen pretty much. I was frozen.
Speaker 5 (32:46):
And when I finally went, they just threw a bunch
of names out. And once you find out you've all
these things attached to you, you literally spiral. It's like
bipolar manic anxiety depression.
Speaker 1 (32:59):
You're like, hold on, hold on, hold on.
Speaker 5 (33:02):
So you have all these smart people in the room
telling you things hooked up on your head and your fingers,
and they're telling you that you're crazy.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
They're telling you have an illness. What the heck do
you mean?
Speaker 5 (33:12):
Nobody saw it for thirty eight years, nothing wrong with me.
You sit in those words and you start you do
everybody's a everybody's a Google scientist. Everybody's a Google doctor.
You start, you start researching, and you start seeing how
bad it is, and then you just start to see
the traits. You start to see those things that show up,
and you start to remember the reactions you had. You
(33:32):
start to see those man expells, You start to see
those times where you want to kill yourself and you
don't know why, but I'm happy. It starts to make sense.
Then you start to acknowledge that there's an illness. And
when you acknowledge it, there's an illness that is a
tough situation. No matter how celebritized it is in the world.
It's great when Michael Phelps says it, it's great when
the NFL got with CT says it. But when you're
(33:55):
just a normal person trying to make ends meet and
you're trying to do the right things, then you're just
an onmal person. That's crazy and that's what it feels like.
So when they try to pump you with all these
mans or cocktail as they say, I ain't even take
a talent all. When I got out of my surgery
from my shoulder or when I had my leg done,
I literally wouldn't even when I was sitting in the hospital.
I wouldn't even hit the morphine pump. I was like,
(34:16):
I'm gonna wait, I'm not gonna do this. And when
you're from I'm from a small roal area, pills kilt.
The majority of the people that I grew up with,
the people that I grew up with, look sixty.
Speaker 1 (34:27):
Five years old because of pills.
Speaker 5 (34:29):
So you're telling me that you want to I'm running
from this, that I'm in shape, that I'm athletic, and
then you're telling me that you want to put me
on a cocktail.
Speaker 1 (34:36):
So I'm normal. Screw you. I am normal. It's a
little different. I'm still dealing.
Speaker 5 (34:40):
With it on a day to day basis because I
don't know, and it's nothing you can control. And like
I said, you have a bunch of smart people that
go to school for this to tell you. Don't patronize me,
don't tell me how you how I feel.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
You don't know, you don't know.
Speaker 3 (34:55):
You mentioned growing up in a small town too. I
would imagine growing and the way that you did that. Also,
mental health, talking about those things was not an open
conversation and not something that was really recognized.
Speaker 5 (35:09):
Absolutely, especially in black people. People of color. It's a stigma.
It's just like you go through things, you get over it.
Ask any of my teachers about me. Jared was the
smartest in the class, but he was a troublemaker. He
was up and down, he was all over the place.
We couldn't control him. I was the outstanding student in
second grade. You know what that meant. I was outstanding
in the hall every single day. She said, you're nominated
(35:30):
to be outstanding student. And I still make good grades.
But they couldn't understand what was going on. But now
when you look back on it hindsight, like this kid
was struggling with an illness that no one said, and
the only thing they wanted.
Speaker 1 (35:43):
To pump me with was ADHD medicine. And my mom
was like, absolutely not.
Speaker 5 (35:48):
This whole time, I'm dealing with these things passed from
all these traumas, even at a young age, and then
you're still trying to add up and really understand what's
going on mentally.
Speaker 3 (35:59):
Do you believe if you had known about this illness
earlier on in your life it would have helped you
in ways or do you think it would have been worse.
Speaker 1 (36:07):
It would absolutely help me, And that's why it's so
hard to not.
Speaker 5 (36:10):
Be resentful of those people that say Jared was just
a bad kid, or Jared just lashed out, or it's
just Jared, or he can't control his emotions, instead of
someone saying and taking the time, we should do this
because in education, they have those at hand. They have
school psychologists, they have people that can recommend you with
you know what I'm saying. That's why our parents worked
nine to five jobs and had insurances so people can recommend.
(36:33):
I think that's the problem. It's the lack of empathy.
I think people are so willing to label. That's been
hard for me over the last year and a half.
I forgive myself, but forgive those that just labeled me
instead of trying to figure out what was wrong. But
it also makes you look at a different light of
other people because you're like, dang, it's something wrong, or
can I do something different?
Speaker 3 (36:53):
You're looking back at a lot of really hard moments
in your life. What has been the thing to keep
you going through all of this despite everything you've faced.
Speaker 1 (37:03):
My family literally serving others.
Speaker 5 (37:05):
When I don't feel like doing something, when I don't
feel like getting out of the bed, I call the
ziplock bag analogy ites like ziplock bag. The harder you breathe,
the more fogs up, the more it closes in on you.
That's how I kind of describe sometimes how I feel
in the mornings. But then when I get up and
Alani runs in, it.
Speaker 1 (37:21):
Was like, Daddy, I slept good. Or also comes in with.
Speaker 5 (37:24):
His any type of weapon that's any type of toy
that he's turned into a weapon and he's like, Dad,
this is.
Speaker 1 (37:29):
My shooter gun. It's like that. Or Laura saying, hey, Jared,
can you do this for me?
Speaker 5 (37:34):
And being able to do that and kind of put
it step outside of myself then it kind of it helps,
but also trying not to stay busy because I still
have to sit in it. I still have to sit
in that pain to really understand what it is, because
it is it's hard to control, to understand those.
Speaker 1 (37:50):
Triggers because there are so many.
Speaker 5 (37:52):
You don't realize there are triggers, because that's why you
will as shout knack certain the way you do, because
when you internalize those triggers, that's what what emotions are.
Emotions are valid, they're just not true. So whatever I'm
internalizing doesn't mean, it's reality or real. If I can't
process it or get it out, then it comes out
later in a negative way.
Speaker 1 (38:12):
That's the struggle.
Speaker 3 (38:13):
At thirty nine, you talk about your family. How does
it feel at this point in your life? Despite learning
what you've learned in the last year and a half,
you have accomplished all of these things, and you have
this beautiful family in a really great life, and you
do have your name on a house and some really
cool accomplishments. After all of that, you look back at
(38:34):
your life, How does that feel now? Did you ever
think that was going to happen?
Speaker 5 (38:38):
Absolutely not. I thought I would be by myself. I
thought I'd be angry. I thought I'd end up like
my grandfather down by myself. I mean every morning I
wake up, I literally say God, like I don't deserve this.
People don't know the journey man, they don't know the journey.
Speaker 1 (38:53):
But it's cool. It's scary, but.
Speaker 5 (38:55):
It's cool because I can now I can be more
aware from my kids if I see some things in them,
because I'm going to be quick on it. That's why
I'm always asking my oldest I'm asking them how they
feel or because at a young age you're kind of
spoke to or spoken at. You're not really relevant as
a child, and so I try to give them that voice,
even at three and four and thirteen. I try to
(39:16):
give them that voice because kids are still innocent, so
they're going to tell you from an innocent standpoint.
Speaker 1 (39:21):
It's going to be real.
Speaker 5 (39:22):
It's brutal, but it's going to be real instead of
someone like me that has been around people that have
kind of created you to become jaded.
Speaker 1 (39:30):
It's crazy. Morgan got me over here, thanking girl.
Speaker 3 (39:33):
I want to applaud you because you took everything that
happened in your life and just talking about your family there,
you're doing things to ensure an even better life for them.
A lot of people could take what has happened to
them and continue that cycle.
Speaker 2 (39:45):
You're trying to break that cycle.
Speaker 3 (39:46):
And that's why I love having you as part of
my life, because you're someone who's always showing up.
Speaker 2 (39:51):
You're trying to show up, you know.
Speaker 3 (39:52):
I want to ask you, if there's other people out
there going through any of these things that you've experienced,
what advice would you give to them?
Speaker 1 (40:00):
To tell somebody?
Speaker 5 (40:01):
And it was easier to tell somebody that I didn't know,
because they're going to try to give you a solution.
Even my wife, she tried to give me a solution.
I just needed a soundboard. I just needed someone to say, Hey,
there are eight hundred numbers that you can call. There
are so many free platforms that you can use to
talk to someone. Now, I would also say, if you
talk to someone and they're just trying to give you solutions,
(40:23):
don't get frustrated, because it's just like you meet a doctor.
Not the first doctor is gonna They might not say
the right things, do the right things. I want to
be challenged and because these it will never go away.
Speaker 1 (40:34):
But I'm looking for.
Speaker 5 (40:36):
Things to create tools for me to combat those so
that I understand when it's coming, so that I know
that this cycle is coming, or that this manic episode
is I can sometimes feel it, but then when it's
hits me and I have an anxiety attack of how
to control that. And I think that's the great part
about some of the things in the world.
Speaker 1 (40:56):
You can do.
Speaker 5 (40:56):
But the hardest thing to do is to make that
phone call. Legit the hardest thing I've ever done besides
right this book, was to make that phone call.
Speaker 3 (41:04):
Well, I appreciate you sharing that and the pieces of
advice not only your journey, but to help others, hopefully
who are struggling in the similar situations. Thank you for
sharing all of it.
Speaker 2 (41:14):
Sorry that I made.
Speaker 5 (41:16):
You get a little bit, but I got you know,
I zoned in, jeered, I got sup knuckles, stars weg
But I'm.
Speaker 3 (41:24):
Glad you have a very special voice and one I
wanted people to hear.
Speaker 2 (41:27):
So thank you again for joining.
Speaker 1 (41:28):
Me and thank you for having me Morgan.
Speaker 3 (41:30):
Jared has a new book called Nothing Concealed, talking about
his childhood from a child's point of view. It's his
heavy that he's turned into a support for himself and
he helps it helps others. You can follow him on
social media for his personal training work and the rest
of the things he's doing at Jared Underscore Houston. Thank
you so much for hanging out with myself, Nicole and
(41:50):
Jared today. If you have any advice you want answered
by me or the experts, or just want to leave
a message, you can email Take This Personally podcast at
gmail dot com and be sure to follow me at
web girl Morgan and the podcast Instagram page Take This
Personally Next week I will have on two incredible athletes,
five time Olympic gold medalist and multiple.
Speaker 2 (42:10):
World record holder in the sport of swimming. Missy Franklin.
Speaker 3 (42:14):
She's going to talk about the time she hit rock
bottom and dealing with her mental health before Olympic trials.
Then CrossFit athlete Amy Bream stops by. She was born
with one leg and continues to break the barriers while
chasing her goals as an adaptive athlete. Until then, I
love each and every one of you.
Speaker 2 (42:30):
Have a great week. Bye.
Personally with Morgan Julesman.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Welcome friends. I am super excited about this episode.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
It's Morgan here, and I hope each episode of Take
This Personally so far has helped you either learn things
about yourself or helped you in whatever season of life
you may be in. This week, I have on expert Nicole,
who is a neuroscientist and incredibly well versed in all
things brain health. Then I'm bringing on my good friend
(00:42):
Jared Houston, who shared the ups and downs of his
life journey that got him to where he is today
as a celebrity personal trainer, author and business owner. I
(01:07):
am so excited to welcome Nicole on with us right now.
Speaker 2 (01:11):
Nicole, how are you today?
Speaker 4 (01:12):
I am great. Thank you very much for having me.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
I'm so excited because you are a neuroscientist, you have
a master's in organizational psychology, and you're a personal coach,
which is so many titles and just totally awesome.
Speaker 4 (01:27):
Thank you, that's really kind. Thank you so much for
having me. I'm so excited for this.
Speaker 3 (01:31):
With all of those titles, you have some incredible knowledge
and I want to start with something super easy just
to kick it off, and we're going to talk about
the basics of brain health. So how would you know
if your brain is healthy and happy versus kind of
living in a state of turmoil or chaos per se.
Speaker 4 (01:48):
Well, that's hard to answer because it depends on whether
you have stuff going on. But I always say that
you know, a lot of individuals will work on their
mental health, but then they won't be working on their
brain health. So it's quite hard to sort of be
cognit natively there if you will or happy, if you're
not getting sleep, and if you're not hydrating correctly, if
you're not exercising. So provided you've got all of those
(02:08):
things ticked off and your mental health is still not great,
then you can start thinking, Okay, maybe there's something in
your life that's troubling you or you've got a lot
of stress. But ticking off the basics means that then
your brain can do what it needs to and those
are things like sleep, those are things like nutrition, hydration,
and exercise. And you know, we don't have to go
crazy with all these things either. I post about exercise,
(02:29):
and I think some people get a bit triggered thinking,
you know, like you have to do a marathon running
you don't have to you know, you can go for
a walk something as profound, it's just going for a
walk and be so beneficial for your brain.
Speaker 3 (02:38):
Yeah, And I was going to ask you about that,
because we know exercise is good for many things, not
just brain health, but health in general. And like you mentioned,
it doesn't have to be anything crazy. What are some
other activities that we can do on top of exercising
that are good for your brain health.
Speaker 4 (02:54):
Yeah. So, I mean exercise is great because I always
try and post about reasons to exercise that are not
just associated to weight loss. I think when people hear
the word exercise, they automatically think lose weight, But there's
so much more to that. Exercise increases something called BDNF,
which is brain derived neurotrophic factor. It is essentially a
protein or a molecule that helps strengthen the synapses in
(03:15):
your brain. So they actually looked at post mortem brains
of older individuals, and the ones that stayed active actually
had more proteins in the synapses, meaning that the cognition
was more integral, their synapses were stronger. Now, it's hard
to imagine having synapses that are strong because we can't
see them, but if you think about a muscle being strong,
you think about your bones being strong, having more bone density.
(03:36):
It's the same thing as happening in your brain with
brain derived neurotrophic factors. It's actually literally solidifyingly synapses so
that we can maintain cognition. Another thing about exercise is
that with resistance, exercise especially increases something called IGF one
into growth like factor one, and that is extremely beneficial
in maintaining cognition as well. So I always encourage everyone
(03:58):
to exercise for those reasons, because longevity is anchored in
what we do right now with our life, you know,
with our habits and our health and just small things. Again,
it doesn't need to be crazy stuff.
Speaker 3 (04:11):
As if mental health physical health aren't enough, do it
for your brain health too.
Speaker 4 (04:14):
Yeah, and it all goes hand in hand. I mean,
it's all tied together. You know, when you exercise, you
release and dolphins, you feel good. No one regrets an exercise.
I appreciate that some people, you know, find that a
bit daunting of a stressful. I get a lot of
people that say that actually causes them anxiety, and I
can completely sort of resonate for that because I think
we are in a culture that encourages exercise from a
weight loss perspective. And we have so many social media
(04:36):
influences that you know, look great and you know people
probably feel intimidated, and I understand. But there's so many hobbies.
There's so many things you can do that don't need
to be like going to the gym and lifting. It
could be you know, walking or yoga. Even meditating is
so good for b the enough it's taking up a sport.
Swimming you don't even have to talk to anyone when
you're swimming. Your ears are literally underwater.
Speaker 3 (04:56):
Yeah, exactly, I love those. Those are some you know,
other active you can do. Is there anything outside of
exercise that you're like, make sure you're doing this for
your brain health? Exercise is really important. What's kind of
some other ones there?
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (05:08):
I think the key to keeping brain health is staying active,
so not just physically, but mentally as well. So continue
to learn new things, continue to stay engaged with life.
I know that jobs can get very stressful, and I
think we all saw it through the lockdown, you know,
when we're in these confined spaces and people having to
live in maybe not such happy homes or maybe just
seeing the same thing every day. It's taxing on the
(05:30):
brain and we do see it in research and especially
in mice experiments. When you put them in an environment
that is monotonous and that is not joyful, they will
dispense drugs if they are available. But the drug is
available even if they are in an environment that is happy,
and they choose not to dispense drugs, So the choice
is always there. The environment as well keeps them happy,
so staying engaged with life, so finding a hobby. And
(05:52):
we see this in all the individuals who maintain volunteering
jobs or hobbies or continue to socialize with friends. They
live more prosperous lives and that is linked to b
D and F when we are learning. When we continue
to learn, we continue to change our brain to sort
of it's almost like not letting it stagnate, if you will,
And that is because of b D and F. When
we learn, we increase b D and F as well.
(06:13):
So I actually get all my clients to do some
ball training games, or I encourage them to use the
opposite hand. So try and brush your teeth with your
left hand if you're right handed, or the other hand
if you're left handed. It's really hard, and it's actually
really challenging. So just taking your mind and your brain
sort of places where it's not comfortable will mean that
it has to drive BDNF and then in turn keep
(06:33):
you integrity.
Speaker 3 (06:34):
I mean, I took up adult gymnastics at twenty eight,
and I felt really good about that. But now I
want to brush my teeth with my left hand because
that sounds even more challenge people.
Speaker 4 (06:44):
That ask me questions what the best way to keep
my brain health that the cheapest cost is just hydrating
consistently literally hydrating water, because I found it's quite crazy.
But there's a lot of people that don't drink a
lot of water throughout the day. I clients that only
drink coffee and tea in the evening. It's very brittle,
and I was say, no, no, no, You've got to drink water.
There's ball through in my coffee and I'm thinking, no,
you have to drink water.
Speaker 3 (07:05):
Well, I will say I am one of those people.
For whatever reason, I my taste buds hate water. I
do my best, though, to still force myself to drink
water because I do know I feel better when I.
Speaker 4 (07:15):
Could you put electrolyteses. You can afford electrolytes, pop them
in and then you've got a flavored water.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
So yes, I do meo mio is my like go
to toys, just sported in and it makes me drink
more water.
Speaker 2 (07:27):
So I found the little cure perfect.
Speaker 4 (07:29):
And if it's got electrolytes, and then it's even better
because your synapses communicate through sodium potassium pump, which is
literally sodium potassium communicating through a membrane, and that's how
we generate energy to spike in action potential, which then
sends the information to another sign apps you see. So
something as simple as ingesting electrolytes can help maintain cognition
and brain help.
Speaker 3 (07:49):
I love when we find out that we're doing good things.
It's wromally find now we're doing bad things. I'm really
excited when I find.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Out I did look good.
Speaker 3 (07:56):
It's actually true that different parts of our brain trigger
different things. You know, they talk about the right brain
and the left brain and creativity versus analytical. Is that
something that's actually true or is that something that just
kind of came out into the universe.
Speaker 4 (08:10):
It came out into the universe with good reason, but
we disprove it. If you will so the left side
of the brain and the right side of brain both
work together in language, so they used to think that
the left side was more logical. I think it's that
way around that. I don't even know anymore because I
know that it's not that way. So I think the
left side they believe was more logical was because it
dealt with language. But actually the right hand side helps
put the sentence together, so it puts sort of context
(08:33):
to the message, whereas a left side just sort of
picks up on the actual words. But no, we don't
have a sort of left brain right brain dominancy. But
with that being said, the left side of the brain
does control the right and the right does control the left.
So if you're right handed and you use your right
hand more, you might be using it a bit more
of your left hand side. But the brain is always
going to maximize itself, and it's always going to make
(08:54):
sure that it's using one hundred percent of its energy.
And the other myth is that we use ten percent
of our brains. That's not true. We use it. The
brain will maximize itself where it can. So creativity and
logical thinking actually come from two separate networks. One network
for creativity is called the default mode network. It's a
network of three brain areas and actually form a triangle
(09:14):
sort of like here in the frontal lobes and then
down to the side and then sort of back together. Okay,
so you can see it now on both sides, and
that's responsible for mind wandering sometimes rumination as well, but
that creativity and individuals who have a higher connectivity in
that system are able to siphon memories and use them
as inspiration, which someone like me will probably lack a
little bit of, although I'm a little bit creative, but
(09:36):
it can be trained. The brain is classic, so it
can be trained. You can become more creative, you can
become more logical. The logic network of the brain is
also on both sides. It's called the central executive network.
So that's cognitively demanding tasks, problem solving, and there will
be higher connectivity in the frontal lobes because that's where
your conscious sort of decision making comes from.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
Wow, that is fascinating, especially to learn the myths that
we learned thanks to the Internet, but thank you for
debunking some of those for us. It sounds like we
can use all of our brains to unlock some new
potential because it's constantly learning.
Speaker 4 (10:09):
Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2 (10:10):
You often talk.
Speaker 3 (10:11):
About rewiring the subconscious part of our brains.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
You know, why would.
Speaker 3 (10:16):
Someone need to do this or want to do this?
What does that kind of look like?
Speaker 4 (10:20):
So I get a lot of clients that sort of
come to me and they say, I have these thoughts,
I have these negative thoughts, and they're purely based on
or they have negative ideas about themselves, and they normally
based on either what their parents did said or what
friends around them said while they were growing up. Observational
knowledge is fantastic because we can learn how to get
to school with our parents without paying attention, right, But
(10:41):
we also see how they interact in the world and
we learn from them. So a lot of my clients
will have picked up habits from their parents that they
wish they didn't have, and I think a lot of
people can resonate with that, and a lot of people
are trying to sort of break those patterns as well.
Whether that's true or not, there are other ways that
that can manifest itself. So maybe you have bad experiences,
you have trauma, but you have these deeply ingrained memories
(11:03):
that are integrated into your behavior in your subconscious if
you will so, ninety percent of our brains, around ninety
percent is subconscious. Ten percent is your conscious thought. Now,
what I mean by that is when you pick up
your toothbrush, you start brushing your teeth with your right
hand side right. You don't even think about that, You
just do it. It's automatic. When you sort of scope
out the world, your brain is constantly matching images with
(11:23):
what it already knows and telling your basil ganglia, which
is a part of the brain stemp that everything is fine.
If something is out of place, if something is new,
or there's a car driving down a one way or
on a pavement, that's when the image doesn't make sense
to your brain, and that's when it alert your conscious
brain to do something about it. And that same thing
happens with behaviors. So little pattern, little messages that we
(11:45):
tell ourselves, little negative thoughts, automatic reactions. Especially my women
clients will look in the mirror and automatically think that
they don't look good. Those are the subconscious thoughts and
pattern that we want to break. We want to change
them because a they are not true, and if they
are true, we can work on them.
Speaker 3 (11:59):
So that's something you work with clients to help them
rewire their brain.
Speaker 4 (12:03):
Yes, that is essentially what I do. We also look
at brain performance, so depending on who the client is
and depending on what they want to do. But I
would say maybe eight and a half times out of
ten people have something that they want to change when
it comes to thought processing.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
That's really cool to hear that that's something we have
access to do.
Speaker 4 (12:18):
Yeah, the brain is plastic. The brain can change in
it pretty much almost anyway, of course, depending on how
much attention and intention we put in and depending you know,
there are some genetic factors of course as well. It
might inhibit us, but we can always sort of get
better and work with what we've got as well.
Speaker 3 (12:33):
Mental health is a hot topic right now, which is
awesome that people want to share more about it. But
there is a difference from my understanding, between adaptational mental
health and people who have mental health diseases.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
Is that correct?
Speaker 1 (12:45):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (12:46):
Can you explain that?
Speaker 3 (12:47):
Because I know on the internet they kind of all
get looped together and we think because we have one,
we may have a disease.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
But that's not necessarily the case.
Speaker 4 (12:53):
Not necessarily the case, and I encourage anyone who might
sort of pick up on what I'm about to say
to pay attention. And I think important thing and these
things is to not self diagnose. If you think that
you have a mental health disorder or disease, to go
and see a professional. Now, disease or disorder is on
a spectrum, right. You can go through a period of
depression that is real, that is true, that is but
(13:14):
not necessarily have the clinical sort of atiology for disorder.
For that disorder, it might be temporary, it might be circumstantial,
it might be due to a chronic information in the system.
So you're going through a very stressful period. You are
susceptible to chronic inflammation, and chronic inflammation is one of
the biggest contributors to depressive symptoms. But that can change. Now.
(13:34):
It's hard for me to obviously give out universal advice
on a podcast because I don't know who the listeners are,
But of course there are there are spectrums to it,
you know, And I think we are uncovering a lot
about depression and other brain health disorders that I'm hopeful
for the future in you know, mental health.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
That's a really exciting thing to hear too. The fact
that we just keep advancing in technology and knowledge puts
us on a better track.
Speaker 4 (13:56):
Yeah, and the fact that we're talking about it, that's
cathartic and itself. I mean, I went on Alive with
someone at doctor Carol and Boyd and she was talking
about how actually we have this ability to self heal
and she was talking about it from a traumatic site
because she deals with trauma. Because she was saying that
talking to friends, talking to family, talking to loved ones
is already going to start the process of you healing,
(14:17):
and it is within yourself. Is a doctor in America,
Bruce D. Perry. He's amazing. I love him. He's a
child psychiatrist and he always says that I've read a
couple of his books that the children that he deals with,
the ones that are placed in loving homes or have
a good network around them of supportive friends, family, the
relative maybe even parents, they are the ones that will
thrive and get through in Okay. So human connection and
(14:40):
just being able to confide in someone can already be
so healing for the individual.
Speaker 3 (14:44):
And that's you know, why I started this podcast was
to ensure that we feel more connected to people and
less alone in what's happening in our lives.
Speaker 2 (14:53):
Yeah, I'm glad to hear that.
Speaker 3 (14:55):
Even if you know, maybe somebody didn't get that as
a child, maybe they're getting it now even a little
bit through this podcast.
Speaker 4 (15:00):
One hundred percent, and it can change. And also I
did a little bit of a deep delve and there's
not that much research around this, but I actually started
sort of doing a bit of sort of research in
asking people and having a pen pal. You know, an
online friend can be just as therapeutic as having an
in person friend. You know, obviously there are benefits to
having someone there and you know, the touch, the sensation
is nice, but having a pen pal or someone online
(15:23):
can be just as useful. So I know that there's
a lot of people that struggle with loneliness. But the
good news is that we can reach out to the
internet for help.
Speaker 2 (15:30):
The good side of the internet.
Speaker 3 (15:32):
The whole idea that your mind plays tricks on you,
is that an actual.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
Truth saying or is that also something we made?
Speaker 4 (15:39):
Have No, so we have a negativity bias. We are
more susceptible to thinking negatives. So they did this in
studies of economics and it's called loss of versions. So
if you receive three nice comments on your Instagram, would
you receive one nasty one, You'll most likely go to
bed worrying about the nasty one instead of remembering the
three nice ones. Right, that's a negativity bias. So the
(16:00):
ratio is about two and a half three to one.
Then we have this limbic system, which is your emotional brain,
and then we have sort of logic brain, which is
your executive function, which is sort of putting you in
logical thinking. So you know, when you're hungry and you're
literally hungry, it's the thing. It's your emotional brain talking,
and then you're eating, you're like, I'm so sorry, I
(16:21):
don't know I said that.
Speaker 3 (16:22):
And I know that's all too well, way too well.
Speaker 4 (16:25):
Same. So, yes, our anxious brain or our emotional brain
will make us believe things that are not necessarily true. Okay,
and there might be some element to that. So what
I always say to my client is write it down,
write it down, make a list, because that's going to
activate your logical thinking. Now you start writing it down,
now you can start seeing it on paper from a
different perspective, from a logical perspective. Then you can start
(16:47):
assessing is this actually real. You know, these things that
I'm saying to myself they true. Okay, fine, maybe they are,
but we can change them.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
Right.
Speaker 4 (16:54):
If we can't, then we need to find a way
to work through them. But most of the time, people
they over sort of how they actually feel about themselves
until they actually start talking to me and they're like, oh, actual, yeah,
maybe it wasn't that bad. You know, there is definitely
a thing. And that's not to sort of discount anyone's
anxiety to say that it's not real, but that is
to say that, you know, we do have this emotional
(17:15):
brain that talks to us quite often.
Speaker 3 (17:17):
Gosh, they're dang emotional brain. I think it gets us
more than we think.
Speaker 4 (17:21):
Especially if you are sort of in survival mode, if
you are highly strung, highly stressed, you know, your brain
is going to be operating to just keep you alive,
and that is an emotional thing, right, So you're going
to be triggered much easier. You're going to be emotional
much easier. There's a you know, we can see why
people suffer so much with these thoughts, these intrusive thoughts
and depressive symptoms as well, and it's a real hole
(17:43):
to get out of sometimes, and anyone that can and
has they should really thank themselves because it's so hard
to get yourself out of that dip back out and like, okay,
I'm actually okay now.
Speaker 3 (17:53):
If anyone who just heard her say that, if you've
come out of that, definitely celebrate yourself because that's the accomplishment.
Speaker 4 (17:59):
It's yeah, exactly, and on a neurobiological level, it is
a whole. You know, your monoamines, your dopamine, europeneffron, serotonin,
they're all low. We don't know exactly, and I think
a lot of people probably read the paper about the
serotonin theories, but there is a mona amine theory around depression.
And we know that when our motivations low, dopamine's low
nor open efron is low. So to get to boost
(18:20):
those things, we normally have to do things to get
us out of those holes. But that's the catch twenty two,
isn't it. Because the thing that's going to make you
feel good is getting out of it, is going for
a run, is you know, speaking to someone. But those
things in itself can be so challenging because sometimes just
reaching out to someone can feel so hard.
Speaker 3 (18:37):
It's almost more important to do that when you don't
feel like doing it. You also posted something on Instagram
that was really interesting to me and shout out your
Instagram real quick.
Speaker 4 (18:46):
Thank you. It's Nicole's neuroscience. So pretty simple.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
Nicole's Neuroscience, so much great content there.
Speaker 3 (18:52):
You had posted something about how every decade we lose
like five to ten percent.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
It makes it harder for us to be motivated to
do things. Yeah, we talk about that a little bit.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
Yes, so we lose dopamine. We lose about five to
ten percent. Now, the caveat is that we do need
to keep moving to keep that dopamine up. So that's why,
you know, you hear about older people that want to
exercise and they can't do it, it's because they don't
have that motivation. They also take less risks. That's one
of the reasons why we motivate DOPAMINEA is your motivation.
You're a transmitter, not necessarily the reward neure a transmitter,
(19:23):
so making sure that you stay active, keeping those dopamine
levels up is extremely important and making sure that we're
buffering the amount that we're losing, because we will lose
dopamine levels. Of course, that is just the nature of
the aging brain. But it's how much we can soften
the blow if you will.
Speaker 3 (19:39):
You also mentioned how the cells in our body are
constantly regenerating based on the things we put into our body,
and I think that's interesting because there's a lot of
discussion about the food, about things that are going on
inside those foods that we're putting inside our bodies. So
in a perfect world, what are some things that we
would need to keep away from from like putting inside
(20:01):
our bodies.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
So we don't know. Deal with this is bad.
Speaker 4 (20:03):
I always say if it has packaging and an advertisement
and you can't if it has packaging it and you
can't get it in its truest form, I would probably
try and limit it. Okay, anything with an advertisement is
probably a no no. If it has an advertisement it's
in a bag of peas, that's different because you can
get that in its truest form. I get asked about oats.
Of course, you can get oats in their truest form,
but normally, if you can't find the product in its
(20:26):
truest form, then stay away. Ultra process foods, ultra process sugar,
fizzy drinks not water, but you know, sodas and stuff
like that. I mean, they have so many added I
mean I went by barbecue sauce the other day because
we wanted to make pulled pork, and ironically, I saw
the one on the shelf that was going to look
the healthiest, And when I got home, my boyfriend was like,
oh my gosh, it was like reading out all these
things and all these e numbers and we were like,
(20:48):
no way, it would just put us straight in the
bin because it's not worth it. So if the label
has loads of ingredients in it, I would question that.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
Okay, that's good to know and something I've been trying
to adapt in my diet. But I also, you know,
I know how hard that is when we get used
to a certain lifestyle.
Speaker 4 (21:03):
One hundred percent. And the thing is, there's research to
show that individuals that eat ultra process diets actually consume
five hundred canaries more per day than individuals who don't,
even though both groups report the same levels of satiety
and the same level of enjoyment in their food. So
that is just the neurons in your stomach that have
adapted to pick up these particular foods. That is your
(21:24):
brain telling you that you're craving these foods, but over
time it will stop doing that. And you know, when
you start eating batty studying healthy, you'd actually stop craving
those kinds of foods. And those foods are designed to
do that to you. Okay. So I don't want anyone
that's listening to this to feel bad about themselves because
they eat ultra process foods. That is literally the marketing
scheme that they implemented on us. They knew exactly what
they were doing. So it's about stepping away from that
(21:47):
and knowing that those foods are there to trick you
into eating them, and there's nothing wrong with you. That
is just how they are designed.
Speaker 3 (21:53):
Please remember that everyone. I'm going to remember that. I
need to take that with me every day. One other
thing I want to talk to you about. I also
saw on your Instagram page you had a breakup protocol
by a neuroscientist. Yeah, and I would love for you
to kind of explain that situation that you had posted about,
because you know, we often hear about people getting out
of relationships and breakups are really hard.
Speaker 4 (22:14):
Breakups are really hard. Breakups are so hard, you know,
and they send you into a spiral. I mean, you
can get depressive symptoms, feelings of suicide. And that is
because you have been used to having this person in
your life all the time. Okay, so your brain has
rewired itself to be able to reach out for this
person anytime it wanted to to speak to that person.
So on a biological level, your brain has rewired itself
(22:37):
to know that that person is there. When that person
gets cut off, it's extremely difficult for the brain to
comprehend that it will diminish serotonin. There's other dopamine factors
as well, So if all of that can be very confusing,
can be very very painful. Again, the good news is
that the brain can change and actually we adapt from
our experiences. So usually what happens is the second time
(22:59):
around we become one, we either don't open up it
was easy, or we know how to deal with it
better because we've been through it before. Right, So I
think for myself, especially, my second breakup wasn't nearly as
difficult as maybe my first one. My third one was
because that one was a very traumatic one. But anyway,
so different situation. Yeah, exactly so, and that's the other
thing you have to says, you know, how traumatic was
(23:20):
a relationship because trauma bonding in itself is so deeply ingrained.
You know what happens is you have these periods of
you know, where someone makes you feel rubbish and then
that sort of dips you a little bit, and then
the reward feels so much bigger because now they're nice
to you, they promise they're never going to do it again,
and that reward actually strengthens the synapses even more because
there's more going on in the brain instead of a
(23:41):
sort of steady state relationship. Does that make sense, Yeah,
it does, And I think a lot of people can
resonate with that because it's the real thing, and it's
really hard to get out of so rewiring your brain
to imagining your life without that person sort of waking
up and just saying to your brain, hey, this person
is not here anymore and it sucks, but it's okay,
because so we're going to be okay, we're going to
learn from this, and it's going to be all gravy.
(24:03):
So that's where visualization comes in, and it is extremely
important because it does actually work. It does help in
teaching us that that person's not there anymore. Engaging activities
are going to make us happy. So help us rewire
our brains. You know, most people will take up a
hobby like gymnastics, I took up ballet or yoga, or
they'll do something crazy with their hair. That's because they
are longing for change. And I said to you earlier,
(24:23):
when we are changing, we're increasing BD and F. If
we can increase B, D and F, we are priming
our brain for change, which means that we can get
over the breakup quicker. Okay, because our brain is now
primed for rewiring.
Speaker 2 (24:34):
I love that. I never knew why I suggested it
to people.
Speaker 3 (24:37):
I have been through enough breakups in my life that
one of the things I realized is learning something new
at least distracted me from what was going on. I
never realized that it was actually my brain was wanting
me to do that.
Speaker 4 (24:48):
Yeah, it's sort of saying like we want B D
and F, we want to rewire. I mean, I don't
know if it's saying that. It's not very scientific for
me to say that, but.
Speaker 2 (24:56):
It totally is.
Speaker 4 (24:57):
I'm putting a narration on my brain that well.
Speaker 3 (25:00):
Thank you so much again for joining me today talking
with me about all things brain health and just the
brain in general. It's one of those things that I
would love to learn so much more about.
Speaker 2 (25:10):
I don't think you can ever get enough knowledge about
the brain.
Speaker 4 (25:13):
Yes, we'll have to do another one, but thank you
so much for having me. Morganis with in Brilliant.
Speaker 3 (25:17):
If you want to connect with Nicole, purchase her new
book or see more of her work, follow her on
Instagram at Nichole's Neuroscience. Now, I've got Jared Houston on
(25:42):
who is a personal trainer. Not only is he my
personal trainer, but he has trained artists like Kane Brown,
Morgan Wallen Diplow, and many others. While he's incredible at
this job, he also has a lot of life experiences
and been on quite the journey to get him where
he is today.
Speaker 2 (25:59):
How are you How are you feeling?
Speaker 1 (26:01):
I'm nervous. They didn't get to hear the pep talk before.
What wasn't a pep talk? Yeah, let's do this.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
I'm sorry that you're nervous.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
I'm like, I haven't been nervous in a long time.
I'm nervous.
Speaker 3 (26:11):
I had a neuroscientist on before you and we were
talking about the basics of brain health. Being a personal trainer,
why do you feel it's so important for people to
move their bodies and work out.
Speaker 5 (26:23):
Often, Well, the science you work out, you got endo
fins you release for the brain to relax, and it does.
It puts you in a different state. So it is
the goal is to move at least thirty minutes a day.
Speaker 3 (26:34):
What have you seen with personal training people when they
come into you versus when they leave you?
Speaker 2 (26:40):
What is that experience like?
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Well, it just depends on what type of person there are.
Speaker 5 (26:44):
There are different types of people, right, So some people
are just results based. So when you get those people,
those are more like my higher analytical people, like I'm
here for this amount of time and they're a little
harder to grow. But at the end of the day
they realize they have gained tools and resources to become better.
Speaker 1 (27:00):
So I think they leave me better.
Speaker 2 (27:01):
I hope they do. I can attest to that.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
I hope they do.
Speaker 4 (27:05):
So.
Speaker 5 (27:05):
Yeah, when they start out, I think everyone has a
goal or something in mind, but it shifts and changes
to where I try to preach or push a lifestyle change.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
You've been trying to do that with me for over
three years.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
Jeez, I know, right, We're.
Speaker 3 (27:17):
Working on that, but there's so much more to you
than personal training. That was the easiest question you were
going to have today. You've gone through so much in
your life, and this is why I think it's important
to share your story. At one of those points in
your life, you dealt with homelessness.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
Can you talk about that a little bit and what
that was like for you?
Speaker 1 (27:36):
Started marchha twenty fourth, two thousand and seven.
Speaker 5 (27:39):
I was doing a lot of bad things and one
day I just decided to stop. Actually, I felt God
stopped everything. A month later, I lost everything, so I
didn't have anything. I was training about twenty two kids
from a private school, so the parents loved me. I
was living on couches. Sometimes I was in my car.
I was just all over the place. I think about
(27:59):
it now, how many people open their doors to me?
Speaker 1 (28:02):
It was tough.
Speaker 5 (28:02):
I don't think anybody ever knew that I was struggling,
but yeah, it was hiding. It was the hardest. So
when I see a kid i'm working with, like, hey man,
I'm living upstairs and you're loft, which was literally.
Speaker 1 (28:13):
Like a mansion.
Speaker 5 (28:15):
It was a mansion, but I was always uncomfortable because
I didn't want to be in someone else's space. I
didn't want to be overbearing or I just didn't want
to be a nuisance. So I never really felt I
felt like a nomad. And then once I realized that
it might be a while for me to kind of
get on my feet, then I took a job in Vegas,
and then I ended up almost out there too.
Speaker 2 (28:35):
What was the job you took in Vegas?
Speaker 1 (28:37):
I was a strength coach with UNLV. I had a
training company.
Speaker 5 (28:40):
I was making pretty good money with people, but I
was still struggling back and forth, and I applied for
like sixty something jobs, never got one. And then one
of my fraternity brothers like, hey, man, I know a
guy in Vegas that's coaching at UNLV. And I called
him really good dude, and he was like, all right,
we'll give you a teen wig deal. Promise me mills
and a room and board and all that. Then when
I get there, I spent everything. I just thought of
(29:01):
one way ticket. I got out there. It was nothing
like you said. The meals that I had were the
meals that were left over that I was with breakfast
sandwich is from the kids. It was the late night
meals from that I was actually staying with someone for
about two weeks, who was a real good guy, and
I realized it was putting pressure on him and his
now his wife, and so I told him that I
got a place. And I was sneaking in and out
(29:23):
of the school every single night, and I was sleeping
on a cot in the weight room making sure I
was up and out about four point thirty.
Speaker 1 (29:29):
So nobody knew.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
What was that turning point for you?
Speaker 3 (29:33):
After that job and you were dealing with it still,
then when was the turning point that you finally could
look at yourself and say, I wasn't homeless anymore.
Speaker 5 (29:41):
When I came back, Laura and I had we were married.
She was living in an airbnb. It was like a
hundred square feet. I realized that it was not a
good situation because we're married and we can't even connect
because we have to tire trumble bed together with a
jump rope that I had. So I never really even thought.
I thought that was life is what's going to be.
(30:01):
We just got to make the best of it. But
I didn't really think that until I got my job
in about a year and a half and put a
bid on a house.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
Well she did, because I didn't have any type of credit.
I couldn't even buy a piece of bubble go, let
alone finance that pack of goal.
Speaker 5 (30:18):
But I still never felt complete because it I didn't
wasn't I wasn't a part of it.
Speaker 1 (30:23):
I was just in the room.
Speaker 5 (30:24):
I still had the homeless mindset, so I was living
with a roof over my head. After that time, everything
was in her name, like I was never truly a man.
Speaker 1 (30:32):
I still felt homeless. I've never told anybody that.
Speaker 3 (30:35):
Well, I didn't mean to make you share something that
was hard, but I think it's important for people to
hear because who you are today is this incredible person,
and even then you were still probably that, but you
were dealing with so many things that it shows the
journey to where you are now that you're training some
massive celebrities, but you were even working on a football
(30:56):
team and it still wasn't all that pretty.
Speaker 2 (30:57):
I look at that life story for you.
Speaker 3 (31:00):
Do you look back on it and appreciate what you
went through to get to where you are now, or
is it still something that's really hard for you to
be like I needed to.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
Go through that.
Speaker 5 (31:08):
It's still really hard because nobody I talked to the
coach a few weeks ago, and he never knew. I
couldn't tell my wife, she didn't even know. I'm just
in Vegas, floating like I don't know what's going on.
But it was coming back to those kids and serving
those kids and realizing like it was bigger than me.
But it's still hard to deal with because you always
(31:29):
like an investment you want to see, you want to
see ROI sometimes I don't see that return on that
investment that I did. I feel like I short changed
her because she was here working and taking care of everything,
and I was there simply struggling. But I was still
trying to find my way. So that's a double edged
sword right there. I'm still struggling with that.
Speaker 3 (31:49):
No, I don't think anything says that you will never
have to not struggle with that. That's the beauty of
understanding our journeys that we've gone on. So I appreciate
you sharing that story with us. Hopefully some people can
connect to that. One. I do want to also talk about.
You are diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Is that something that
(32:09):
has impacted you throughout that journey and still impacts you today?
Speaker 2 (32:14):
How does that look for you?
Speaker 5 (32:15):
This is the scariest crap I've ever been through in
my life, my whole life. Everybody's saying, thirty nine years,
it's just Jared, I've never really known what the heck
is going on. And finally I was actually with my
writing coach and I was writing some stuff in a
free write and she was like, Jared, you should probably
go talk to somebody. And I was like, no, I'm good.
(32:37):
It's just me, like I'm just I'm good.
Speaker 1 (32:39):
I'm good.
Speaker 5 (32:39):
And it got to a point to where I couldn't
do anything.
Speaker 1 (32:43):
I was frozen pretty much. I was frozen.
Speaker 5 (32:46):
And when I finally went, they just threw a bunch
of names out. And once you find out you've all
these things attached to you, you literally spiral. It's like
bipolar manic anxiety depression.
Speaker 1 (32:59):
You're like, hold on, hold on, hold on.
Speaker 5 (33:02):
So you have all these smart people in the room
telling you things hooked up on your head and your fingers,
and they're telling you that you're crazy.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
They're telling you have an illness. What the heck do
you mean?
Speaker 5 (33:12):
Nobody saw it for thirty eight years, nothing wrong with me.
You sit in those words and you start you do
everybody's a everybody's a Google scientist. Everybody's a Google doctor.
You start, you start researching, and you start seeing how
bad it is, and then you just start to see
the traits. You start to see those things that show up,
and you start to remember the reactions you had. You
(33:32):
start to see those man expells, You start to see
those times where you want to kill yourself and you
don't know why, but I'm happy. It starts to make sense.
Then you start to acknowledge that there's an illness. And
when you acknowledge it, there's an illness that is a
tough situation. No matter how celebritized it is in the world.
It's great when Michael Phelps says it, it's great when
the NFL got with CT says it. But when you're
(33:55):
just a normal person trying to make ends meet and
you're trying to do the right things, then you're just
an onmal person. That's crazy and that's what it feels like.
So when they try to pump you with all these
mans or cocktail as they say, I ain't even take
a talent all. When I got out of my surgery
from my shoulder or when I had my leg done,
I literally wouldn't even when I was sitting in the hospital.
I wouldn't even hit the morphine pump. I was like,
(34:16):
I'm gonna wait, I'm not gonna do this. And when
you're from I'm from a small roal area, pills kilt.
The majority of the people that I grew up with,
the people that I grew up with, look sixty.
Speaker 1 (34:27):
Five years old because of pills.
Speaker 5 (34:29):
So you're telling me that you want to I'm running
from this, that I'm in shape, that I'm athletic, and
then you're telling me that you want to put me
on a cocktail.
Speaker 1 (34:36):
So I'm normal. Screw you. I am normal. It's a
little different. I'm still dealing.
Speaker 5 (34:40):
With it on a day to day basis because I
don't know, and it's nothing you can control. And like
I said, you have a bunch of smart people that
go to school for this to tell you. Don't patronize me,
don't tell me how you how I feel.
Speaker 1 (34:51):
You don't know, you don't know.
Speaker 3 (34:55):
You mentioned growing up in a small town too. I
would imagine growing and the way that you did that. Also,
mental health, talking about those things was not an open
conversation and not something that was really recognized.
Speaker 5 (35:09):
Absolutely, especially in black people. People of color. It's a stigma.
It's just like you go through things, you get over it.
Ask any of my teachers about me. Jared was the
smartest in the class, but he was a troublemaker. He
was up and down, he was all over the place.
We couldn't control him. I was the outstanding student in
second grade. You know what that meant. I was outstanding
in the hall every single day. She said, you're nominated
(35:30):
to be outstanding student. And I still make good grades.
But they couldn't understand what was going on. But now
when you look back on it hindsight, like this kid
was struggling with an illness that no one said, and
the only thing they wanted.
Speaker 1 (35:43):
To pump me with was ADHD medicine. And my mom
was like, absolutely not.
Speaker 5 (35:48):
This whole time, I'm dealing with these things passed from
all these traumas, even at a young age, and then
you're still trying to add up and really understand what's
going on mentally.
Speaker 3 (35:59):
Do you believe if you had known about this illness
earlier on in your life it would have helped you
in ways or do you think it would have been worse.
Speaker 1 (36:07):
It would absolutely help me, And that's why it's so
hard to not.
Speaker 5 (36:10):
Be resentful of those people that say Jared was just
a bad kid, or Jared just lashed out, or it's
just Jared, or he can't control his emotions, instead of
someone saying and taking the time, we should do this
because in education, they have those at hand. They have
school psychologists, they have people that can recommend you with
you know what I'm saying. That's why our parents worked
nine to five jobs and had insurances so people can recommend.
(36:33):
I think that's the problem. It's the lack of empathy.
I think people are so willing to label. That's been
hard for me over the last year and a half.
I forgive myself, but forgive those that just labeled me
instead of trying to figure out what was wrong. But
it also makes you look at a different light of
other people because you're like, dang, it's something wrong, or
can I do something different?
Speaker 3 (36:53):
You're looking back at a lot of really hard moments
in your life. What has been the thing to keep
you going through all of this despite everything you've faced.
Speaker 1 (37:03):
My family literally serving others.
Speaker 5 (37:05):
When I don't feel like doing something, when I don't
feel like getting out of the bed, I call the
ziplock bag analogy ites like ziplock bag. The harder you breathe,
the more fogs up, the more it closes in on you.
That's how I kind of describe sometimes how I feel
in the mornings. But then when I get up and
Alani runs in, it.
Speaker 1 (37:21):
Was like, Daddy, I slept good. Or also comes in with.
Speaker 5 (37:24):
His any type of weapon that's any type of toy
that he's turned into a weapon and he's like, Dad,
this is.
Speaker 1 (37:29):
My shooter gun. It's like that. Or Laura saying, hey, Jared,
can you do this for me?
Speaker 5 (37:34):
And being able to do that and kind of put
it step outside of myself then it kind of it helps,
but also trying not to stay busy because I still
have to sit in it. I still have to sit
in that pain to really understand what it is, because
it is it's hard to control, to understand those.
Speaker 1 (37:50):
Triggers because there are so many.
Speaker 5 (37:52):
You don't realize there are triggers, because that's why you
will as shout knack certain the way you do, because
when you internalize those triggers, that's what what emotions are.
Emotions are valid, they're just not true. So whatever I'm
internalizing doesn't mean, it's reality or real. If I can't
process it or get it out, then it comes out
later in a negative way.
Speaker 1 (38:12):
That's the struggle.
Speaker 3 (38:13):
At thirty nine, you talk about your family. How does
it feel at this point in your life? Despite learning
what you've learned in the last year and a half,
you have accomplished all of these things, and you have
this beautiful family in a really great life, and you
do have your name on a house and some really
cool accomplishments. After all of that, you look back at
(38:34):
your life, How does that feel now? Did you ever
think that was going to happen?
Speaker 5 (38:38):
Absolutely not. I thought I would be by myself. I
thought I'd be angry. I thought I'd end up like
my grandfather down by myself. I mean every morning I
wake up, I literally say God, like I don't deserve this.
People don't know the journey man, they don't know the journey.
Speaker 1 (38:53):
But it's cool. It's scary, but.
Speaker 5 (38:55):
It's cool because I can now I can be more
aware from my kids if I see some things in them,
because I'm going to be quick on it. That's why
I'm always asking my oldest I'm asking them how they
feel or because at a young age you're kind of
spoke to or spoken at. You're not really relevant as
a child, and so I try to give them that voice,
even at three and four and thirteen. I try to
(39:16):
give them that voice because kids are still innocent, so
they're going to tell you from an innocent standpoint.
Speaker 1 (39:21):
It's going to be real.
Speaker 5 (39:22):
It's brutal, but it's going to be real instead of
someone like me that has been around people that have
kind of created you to become jaded.
Speaker 1 (39:30):
It's crazy. Morgan got me over here, thanking girl.
Speaker 3 (39:33):
I want to applaud you because you took everything that
happened in your life and just talking about your family there,
you're doing things to ensure an even better life for them.
A lot of people could take what has happened to
them and continue that cycle.
Speaker 2 (39:45):
You're trying to break that cycle.
Speaker 3 (39:46):
And that's why I love having you as part of
my life, because you're someone who's always showing up.
Speaker 2 (39:51):
You're trying to show up, you know.
Speaker 3 (39:52):
I want to ask you, if there's other people out
there going through any of these things that you've experienced,
what advice would you give to them?
Speaker 1 (40:00):
To tell somebody?
Speaker 5 (40:01):
And it was easier to tell somebody that I didn't know,
because they're going to try to give you a solution.
Even my wife, she tried to give me a solution.
I just needed a soundboard. I just needed someone to say, Hey,
there are eight hundred numbers that you can call. There
are so many free platforms that you can use to
talk to someone. Now, I would also say, if you
talk to someone and they're just trying to give you solutions,
(40:23):
don't get frustrated, because it's just like you meet a doctor.
Not the first doctor is gonna They might not say
the right things, do the right things. I want to
be challenged and because these it will never go away.
Speaker 1 (40:34):
But I'm looking for.
Speaker 5 (40:36):
Things to create tools for me to combat those so
that I understand when it's coming, so that I know
that this cycle is coming, or that this manic episode
is I can sometimes feel it, but then when it's
hits me and I have an anxiety attack of how
to control that. And I think that's the great part
about some of the things in the world.
Speaker 1 (40:56):
You can do.
Speaker 5 (40:56):
But the hardest thing to do is to make that
phone call. Legit the hardest thing I've ever done besides
right this book, was to make that phone call.
Speaker 3 (41:04):
Well, I appreciate you sharing that and the pieces of
advice not only your journey, but to help others, hopefully
who are struggling in the similar situations. Thank you for
sharing all of it.
Speaker 2 (41:14):
Sorry that I made.
Speaker 5 (41:16):
You get a little bit, but I got you know,
I zoned in, jeered, I got sup knuckles, stars weg
But I'm.
Speaker 3 (41:24):
Glad you have a very special voice and one I
wanted people to hear.
Speaker 2 (41:27):
So thank you again for joining.
Speaker 1 (41:28):
Me and thank you for having me Morgan.
Speaker 3 (41:30):
Jared has a new book called Nothing Concealed, talking about
his childhood from a child's point of view. It's his
heavy that he's turned into a support for himself and
he helps it helps others. You can follow him on
social media for his personal training work and the rest
of the things he's doing at Jared Underscore Houston. Thank
you so much for hanging out with myself, Nicole and
(41:50):
Jared today. If you have any advice you want answered
by me or the experts, or just want to leave
a message, you can email Take This Personally podcast at
gmail dot com and be sure to follow me at
web girl Morgan and the podcast Instagram page Take This
Personally Next week I will have on two incredible athletes,
five time Olympic gold medalist and multiple.
Speaker 2 (42:10):
World record holder in the sport of swimming. Missy Franklin.
Speaker 3 (42:14):
She's going to talk about the time she hit rock
bottom and dealing with her mental health before Olympic trials.
Then CrossFit athlete Amy Bream stops by. She was born
with one leg and continues to break the barriers while
chasing her goals as an adaptive athlete. Until then, I
love each and every one of you.
Speaker 2 (42:30):
Have a great week. Bye.
Hosts And Creators
Bobby Bones
Amy Brown
Lunchbox
Eddie Garcia
Morgan Huelsman
Raymundo
Mike D
Abby Anderson
Scuba Steve
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