February 15, 2022 • 38 mins
On today’s episode, Dr. “Sex” Reese talks to a man who got burned trying to swing, a surprise podcaster who drops a bombshell, and a naughty nanny who has money on her mind.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Make sure to subscribe, rate, and review The Doctor sex
re Show wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts. On
today's episode of The Doctor Sex Reese Show, the Good
Doctor talks to a man who got burned trying to swing,
a podcaster drops a bombshell, and a naughty nanny has
(00:23):
money on our mind. And now the Doctor Sex Reath
Show with your host, Dr Robert sex Reese. This is
the Doctor Robert sex re Show. I'm Dr Robert sex Reese.
How can I help you today? Every caller that calls me,
I take as it's me or them. I don't like
(00:46):
that either, honestly, now that I'm hearing it come from you,
very excited to talk about this, Can you give me
a second? I'm choking on a walnut. Do you know
you're on the air. Can we just put aside our
differences and agree that I was right, very impatient to
hear your question, but also living in fear of I'm
throwing gems at you and you just keep dropping them
in the river. My situation is I'm doing what I love,
I'm free from human touch, and I'm here to give
(01:09):
what I have to you. Hello, everyone, Welcome to the
Doctor Sex re show. I'm your host, Dr Robert sex Reese.
Today's topic. I do not know what I did to
deserve this nightmare of a topic, but it is swinging.
As if one couple trying to rub or shove things
(01:30):
into each other is not enough. The thought of multiple
couples engaging in this is truly sickening. But I don't
have as much control over the show as I once did,
and I'm not complaining about that. But I gotta say,
in terms of swinging, the thing that really pardon my
French burns, my biscuits is that I used to love
going to my favorite city park under a full moon,
(01:54):
just sitting on a swing set and going to town
the gentle resistance to grab the only thing that gave
me a sense of calm in this world. But then,
about two years ago, I learned that swinging means also
to have multiple sexual partners, and that tiny sliver of
pleasure was drowned in a bucket of turpentine, which is
(02:15):
my least favorite way to drown and also my least
favorite way to pronounce turpentine. Also, I guess, as Shelley
points out, there's an important, uh topical, sort of timely
reason for this with you know, everybody is so involved
in politics and elections, the very important swinger vote, which
I guess from year to year can turn an election
(02:37):
on its head. I had no idea that's such grotesque.
People had such an influence on politics. So if you
are a swinger voter, thank you for thank you for
tuning in. But I do want to bring in our
first caller. We have someone here by the name of
Michael Demewski. Michael Demewski, you're on the air with Door
(02:58):
Sex Reese. What's your question? J Yeah, Hi, Hi, My
I'm calling because my fiance and I we were going
to swing with a couple, but we were misky. Your
full name Michael Arthur Demevski. Yeah, okay, because we generally
only give first names. But the way I read it here,
(03:19):
the way Shelley wrote it, I thought maybe Michael Domeski
was your full first name. No, Michael's fine. Okay, Well
it's the cats out of the bag already, Mike. So
I don't know if you want to call back with
a different identity or if you just want to keep
rolling through this because what you're about to say is
going to be on public record for all time. I'm
(03:41):
not worried about having my full name out there. I'm
I'm proud member of the community. And uh, it doesn't
What are you worried about? What? What are you worried about?
I mean, you know, climate change? Change? Are you talking
about in relation to swinging? No? No, just I I
already have had enough, honestly of swinging. Well can I
(04:04):
say my questions still? Yes? But then can we get
to climate change after? I mean, I guess I'd really
love to have my question and I'd really love to
have an inhabitable planet for my grandchildren. I mean, I
think you can. I'm worried about it. Okay, so maybe
that's a bigger issue than whatever you're about to bring up.
But I guess I don't know because, in fairness to
you haven't heard your question yet, So go ahead lay
(04:27):
it on me. My, my fiance and I were we
were going to swing with this couple new to the scene,
and uh so we decided to, you know, make a
night of it, and we wanted to rent out a big,
expensive hotel room for the night. Um so we rented
out the Starlight Casita suite at the Laquinta in and
(04:48):
uh that's pronoun Lakinah might be Laquinta. I don't I
don't speak Spanish, but I I but we were ghosted.
The other couple doesn't show up, and uh, you know,
he left us with no fun. And you know, I
was kind of annoyed because we had you know, we
had kind of fronted a lot. And so I this
(05:10):
is where my fiance and I had a disagreement because
I wanted to write these people in angry note my
fiance says, we we shouldn't be bothering them, We should
be understanding about an inexperienced couple, someone new to the
scene getting cold feet. So I just wanted to ask you,
who do you think is right? She's right? No, you're right.
That was a very quick Well I'm a little confused
(05:32):
about a lot of stuff. First of all, how did
you land on the hotel that you chose? What? What
was it about this place that you thought, yes, this
is the right environment for breaking God's law. I mean, doctor,
I feel a little I feel a little attacked, but
you are, Yes, you're being attacked. Yes, but well, if
(05:53):
you'll let me explain. Uh, the the lacina in in
our town is uh is sort of markedly nicer than
the Best Western, which is the other hotel that's near us.
So you really wanted to impress these people, or you
wanted to you wanted to give them, you want to
show them a good time to say to kind of
(06:14):
kind of pardon the expression, swing your dink a little
bit and be like, look, I'm ready, I'm ready to
lay down some sawbucks. I've never heard either of those expresses,
so that we can really get it on swing wise. Yeah,
sawbuck is a is a is a very cool, very
hip term for a ten dollar bill. Oh okay, well, yeah,
so I did want to lay down some sawbucks. How
(06:37):
do you know these guys? Where? How did you get
to the point where you felt comfortable enough to humiliate
you and your fiance to ask them to do this?
And then, of course I have to live through the terrible,
even worse humiliation of them not showing up. And now
you're on the air with everyone knowing your name. Well,
I'm totally comfortable having everyone know my name. I'd rather not,
(06:58):
you know, say too much about personally. I met them
at a work mixer. Specifically, we met the guy at
uh this work mixer, and sort of right away I
I was like, oh, he's you know what, this guy's
sort of a prime cut. And then when we met
his wife, uh, we felt the same, and my fiance
(07:20):
sort of started to initiate This is something I don't understand.
How do you even do you have to play it cool?
Are you guys constantly referring to swinging? This is the
thing that I don't like. It's it's a it's a
thing with any kind of community that gets way too
into anything, whether it's pokemon or bird watching or swinging.
Just like, yeah, we're part of the community. We swing,
We love to swing. Everything is about swinging. Do you
(07:42):
Are you always talking about swinging when you're swinging or
you're saying like, hey, we're swinging now, don't you enjoy
the swinging? I also love skiing, you know, we go
on ski trips. Let's get down to the brass tax.
How much did the hotel room cost for this night?
A night? Wow? So how did you get into swinging?
(08:04):
What's missing? What? What are you? What are you lacking here?
I feel like something's lacking well mostly other sexual partners.
Can you describe how they look without without giving without
giving away who they are even though you've practically shared
with me your social security and routing numbers. Just my name,
There's there's got to be other Michael Domevski's around me.
(08:25):
I don't think so. That's a very particular Macedonian sounding
name to me. I mean, it is a Macedonian name.
But there are just a decent Macedonian population where around
the country. Well, for one, Spokane, Washington. Is that where
you're calling from? Not for not necessarily. So you work
in logging, I'm trying to deduce a little bit more
(08:48):
about you here to figure out what is going on
with you. I work in HR for a logging company. Yes,
so this guy that you this prime cut of meat,
is he a lum ber jack? Well, again, I'm not
saying whether or not he works with me, but yes,
he is a lumberjack. Do you and your fiancee whose
(09:08):
name I don't want to know, do you to fight
about money a lot? No? We we generally live within
our means. We we do, okay, we do like to
splurge if we're gonna swing with people. That is a
disgusting sentence, which part of it is discussed. Well, splurge
didn't thrill me. What's wrong with splurge. I'm disgusted by
(09:30):
anything that has to do with intimacy, bodily function, all
of that stuff. There's other four. Look, intimacy is one
of the most overrated human conditions, right. It breeds contempt,
it breeds disappointment, it breeds bacteria. You're a sex therapist.
This is on me. I should have listened to an episode.
(09:50):
So what does this come down to for you? You You
you want you want these people to what pay you
the to split the four hundred sixt plus tax. Do
you want them to merely acknowledge that you spent all
this money and to apologize. What is it that you
want out of the situation, little Mikey d It's more
(10:12):
the second thing. I we were never going to ask
them to pay for half or anything like that. But
I was under the impression that I'd be, you know,
going to town on these two people that we met,
and you know, I'm disappointed that we didn't get to
and well, look here's what I think. I don't like
(10:33):
what this couple did to you. Tell them right now,
Tell them right now on the air. Assume they're listening
what you want them to feel? Fine, when you guys
did not show up to the star like casita suite
that my fiance and I reserve for us. It hurt
(10:54):
our feelings. Frankly, you didn't give us any notice. You do,
you just didn't show up. But it's just it, especially
it doesn't feel good you guys. Well, I'm mighty sorry, Michael.
I didn't realize your feelings will be hurt. We had
a family emergency we had to intend to. I guess
it just slipped my mind, and I do rightly apologize,
(11:17):
Timber all right, we feel good now, weirdly, yes, okay,
And you know what, I gotta tell you, it felt
kind of good to embody that kind of a character
for a little bit. There is that a thing you
do on the show? I mean, I'll do whatever it takes.
At first, it felt like you were mocking me, and uh,
(11:41):
I actually never thought of it that way. That I
don't know, you know, yeah, what their circumstances were, maybe
you can, maybe you can reach out to them and
do it through a lens of Hey, is everything okay
with you? Guys? Don't even bring up the swinging or
the substantial hotel bill that you're now stuck with, and
just make it about him. Make sure that everything's going
(12:04):
all right with him, and I think I would. I
think you're right, doctor, I think I will reach out. Okay,
So thanks Michael. I hope this was something for you.
I think it would thank you. All right. That was
Michael Demevsky of Spokane, Washington, works in HR for a
major logging company, and um, maybe I just helped him
(12:27):
stop being such a coward. We'll find out. This is
the Doctor sex re Show. I'm Dr Robert sex Reese. Alright,
I want to take a second here to thank one
of our sponsors. Guys, phones are filthy. They are just
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(12:51):
never used my phone without the Doctor sex Reese phone tongs.
Just pull out the tongs, use them to pick up
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(13:11):
to touch your phone again. Speaking of phones, let's go
back to the phones for our next caller. We have
someone on the line by the name of Amy. Hello, Amy,
or on The Doctor Sex Reese Show. The topic today
is swingers. How can I help you? Hi, Amy Reese.
(13:35):
Oh that's funny, Hi Amy, I'm Dr sex Reese. Oh interesting.
Why would you choose such a disgusting middle name? I
didn't actually choose it, but it is. It's legally I
have to go by that name when I'm on the air.
But yeah, I don't like saying it, um, but I
guess I learned a long time ago how to how
to bury that deep down. You know. I'm glad that
(13:56):
you buried it, and it's not something that you wear
on your sleeve, because you live in a world that
is severely too horny for its own good, and that
is something that I'm trying to take a stand against.
Oh you are, Yeah, in your in your personal life,
you've been taking a stand against horny nous. Oh completely.
It's refreshing to talk to a young person who's who's
(14:17):
so revolted by sex. Can I ask how old you are? Yeah?
I am twenty two. I like I like you, Amy.
I rarely say that to uh, to a caller or
a person, but I like you. I like your attitude
right right off the bat, You're coming out swinging and uh,
(14:39):
and I happened to uh to agree with the direction
you're punching in And speaking of swinging, that is today's topic.
Did you have a question about that? I actually prefer
seesaws as opposed to swings. Oh, I see, so you're
talking about the act of swing, like a swing on
a playground. What else recurring to? Okay, well, in the again,
(15:04):
it's a sex related term. But um, sometimes married overweight
couples will get together with other married overweight couples and
they will have sex with each other. Yeah. Oh, it's
an interesting thing, Dr Reese that you like Amy Reese's personality,
Amy Reese, do anything for you. I'm hoping this is
(15:30):
not related to that interesting thing happened on a previous show.
Somebody called and accused me of being the father to
a woman named Amy Reese, who now that I'm just
make an eye contact with Shelly is twenty two. Did
you ever work at the tc B? Y that? Okay?
I'm I'm assuming a man, a nefarious man by the
(15:54):
name of Jeff f contacted you and filled your head
with lies? Is that is that pretty close? What do
you want to know, Amy Reese? Listen? I have a
questionnaire here that will confirm that you are, not, in fact,
my father. I like where you're going with this, that
it's going to confirm that I'm not your dad. Yeah,
(16:14):
this is the dumb asked daddy quiz. It is to
confirm that you are not mine or anyone's father. You
take this, we prove you're not my dad, and we
all go home happy. How does that sound? That sounds great?
I would love to go home happy. Has not happened
in twenty three years, but maybe tonight's tonight. Let's do
the questionnaire. All right, Daddy's dear cast listeners, here we go. Name.
(16:38):
My name is Dr Robert Ruth Sex Reese. Are you
now or have you ever been? My father? No? Do
you consider yourself emotionally open? No? Do you know? Have
you ever enjoyed sexual relations with my mother Genevieve Reese?
Absolutely not. When is the last time you read someone
to sleep? I have had a very distraught listener just
(16:59):
last week. Actually, I had to read, uh read this lye.
I read the d S M five to him? Did
they want you to read that to them? Unclear? Have
you ever blacked out? Yes? I blacked out for a
six month period in When is the last time you
changed to tire? If I get a spare tire, I
(17:22):
leave the car there and I walk away and then
somebody takes care of it. Have Triple A? I do
have Triple A? Are you aware that Triple A is
currently running a special promotion for qualified customers to upgrade
to a Platinum membership for the low annual rate of
That actually sounds really good, Triple A Piece of mind,
(17:43):
mile after mile, Welcome back to the Daddy Dear Cast.
How was that for you? Dr Reese? Are you literally
recording a podcast right now? Yeah, the Daddy Dear Cast podcast. Okay, Well,
I mean I know what I I understand the grind.
I mean, I'm hosting a day the show here. But
don't you think there's some ethical concerns with recording a
(18:03):
podcast while somebody else is having you on their own show.
When you have a podcast and you get a call
saying that your father is Dr sex Reese, I think
you jump at the chance for a good podcast. Okay.
I have to ask you, Amy, how it was that
you came to be in touch with me and to
(18:26):
call in today. Was this something you did of your
own volition? Or did one of my producers, maybe Shelly,
track you down and try to get you to call Yeah,
really sweet lady she got in touch with me, said hey,
I think this guy is your dad. And I said, okay, okay,
Well she is not a sweet lady. She's one of
(18:47):
the great deceivers. And I'm gonna put you on hold
for just a second. Amy, I'll be right back. I
just gotta remount my producer real quick. Okay, Shelly, what's
happening here? Please tell me? Tell me on air, explain
to the listeners what's happening here? Okay, Um, you had
a caller a few weeks ago who brought up this claim,
(19:10):
and as a producer of this show, it is my
job to research that claim. And my research led me
to Amy, who you were just talking to. Yes, but
you did it in such a way that I feel deceived,
and I think, and I think the audience probably feels deceived. Well,
(19:30):
I apologize that you feel deceived. So you thought that
you would just have her call in, watch me melt down,
and then laugh your way to the bank. Somehow, I'm
not laughing. And you also didn't melt down. You guys
had a really genuine connection. But I'm about but I'm
in the midst of melting down right now. I'm seething.
(19:52):
I'm seething. Well, I'm I'm sorry that you think I'm
the source of that. You are clear, there's no You're
definitively the source of it. I was listening to the
conversation and I think, with almost no shadow of a doubt,
that that girl is your daughter. No way, you're wrong.
(20:13):
It seems as though you want to move on. Yes,
So let's get our next caller in here, please. Okay,
So the options are a couple who hosted an orgy
at their home and after everyone left and they were
cleaning up, they realized someone had pooped in their jacuzzi. Well,
you know, I can't do that, Shelly, I don't know that.
(20:36):
It's a it's an episode about swinging, and they hosted
a party and they had property. Damn. I don't like swinging,
I don't like parties, and I don't like defecation. These
are like the three main things. That's the first thing
we talked about, Okay, at our very first meeting. I
like with that, Okay, crossing them off. No poop in
(20:57):
the hot tub, that's it. Those are all the calls.
Well there's Amy, fine, Amy, can you hear us right now?
I can hear you, but I haven't really been listening. Okay,
that's terrific. That's terrific. So you're so Shelly betray me
and you don't even know how to operate aboard. Weren't
you the one saying you were going to put her
on hold? Yeah, but I don't know what I'm doing here. Okay, Sorry,
(21:20):
I didn't realize you don't know anything. Um, Hi, Amy,
it's Shelly. We we met earlier. Yeah, you're the reason
this whole, uh, this whole story that is turning into
a very non story happened. How's it going? Thank you?
It's going well. So, now that I have both of you,
I thought it might be interesting, fun, illuminating, or at best,
(21:45):
really end this controversy. If if I could just ask
you Bill some questions and then we can just put
this whole thing to bed right now. I mean, I'm
totally okay with doing a question air type quiz um,
but before we do that, I would just love for you,
Shelly to say how much you enjoy the Daddy Dear
(22:08):
Cast podcast. I do enjoy it. I'm a new listener.
I mean I I strenuously object to this ethically, but
I think Shelly, what Amy's asking for is for you
to I d yourself so that you can use it
as a promo in the in the podcast. I'm Shelly
from The Doctor Sex Show. I got it. I got it. Hello,
(22:29):
I'm Shelly from the Doctor Sex Reese Show. And I
know amazing content when I hear it, and that is
what I found with Amy's podcast. I think you probably
have to say the name of the podcast, right, Daddy
deer Cast, Daddy deer Cast, Daddy dear Cast. Do you
want me to do one for you just so you
have it? Oh? That would be amazing. So this is
(22:52):
a big moment. I hope my listeners are have their
ears personal. I'm just gonna do it as one pro
to another. You're listening to the Daddy Deer Cast, the
only podcast that delves into the father complex hidden beneath
each man. I'm Dr Sex Reese. Keep on listening. That
was better than your promos for your own show. Do
you stop? Thank you so much? I think we're good. Okay,
(23:16):
so you guys want to answer some fun questions? Yeah,
I mean I've completely lost any control of the show,
so why not hand it over now to my producer.
I mean, I've just done a promo for for you know,
I guess a rival, right, um? Question Number one favorite hobby, Amy,
I like to knit schalls for friends. I like to
(23:39):
do I like to do a string art for friends.
Favorite potato, Yeah, sweet potatoes. Isn't it funny how at
the grocery store sometimes like the yams and the sweet
potatoes are all together and you're like, I don't even
know which one I want. Yeah, they're totally different, though
I don't know. I find confusing and very negligent on
(24:03):
the part of the grocery store. I've complained numerous times.
See Shelley, this is like, are you feeling silly yet? No?
I think you guys are something like you're having a
nice time doing this questionnaire. To be honest, your greatest fear?
What was that again? Okay, Well that was all my
(24:25):
questions and you didn't have a single and I don't
think we had a single answer that was the same. Well, Amy,
unless you know, you have anything else you need to
get done for your show during my show, I'd kind
of like to wrap up this call. What do you think, Shelley,
I mean, I think it's pretty clear to everybody out
there that I think it's crystal clear that we have
(24:50):
common that I may like her as a person and
feel a kind of a connection to her, But in
terms of any of that sort of genetic or or
personality workers and traits that you might look for and
a father and a daughter, they're just not here. They're
just not here. And you tried to set up a
trap for us, Shelly, you betrayed me, and you tried
to set up a tiger trap, and it failed. The
(25:13):
tiger jumped over the trap. And Amy, if you want
to keep in touch, I would love to. If you
need a mentor, or if you just want somebody to
bounce some ideas off of, or you know, I do
have this anti kissing club at my college that I
think that you would be a great speaker for I
would actually love to. Okay, Well, hopefully, Amy, thank you
so much. Hopefully this puts an end to this ridiculous controversy.
(25:39):
Thank you. Yes, I feel very relieved that the father
once again um eludes me. Yeah, the search for the
father goes on. I wish you the best of luck
with that or maybe the worst of luck. Shelley, you
and I are going to talk again during the during
the commercial break. Looking forward to it. Okay, me too.
(26:01):
We're gonna take a break now, Thank you all. We'll
be back in a minute. I would like to take
a minute to think one of our sponsors, ex Caliber Condoms.
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(26:22):
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Countdown of the top five thousand colors has been ranking
the colors for the past five years and they've barely
even started Today. We're at number thirty. It's a color
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that's been called better than regular sienna. Yes, I'm talking
about burnt sienna. This week features shades of red, blue,
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of the top five colors of all time. Every morning
at six and six thirty. Yeah, Yeah, let's welcome our
(27:09):
third and hopefully final caller of the show. I have
Sasha on the line. Sasha, thanks for calling The Doctor
Sex Reese Show. Today's topic is swinging. How can I
help you? Hi? So my question, I've been working as
a nanny and one of the notable profession to bring
(27:33):
someone into your home and to trust them with that
degree of certainty. Uh wow, I could never do it.
I could never trust anyone that much. But I applaud
you on your work. Thank you. So one of the
things that I offer is, in an effort to bring
(27:55):
the flame back into their marriage, I enter the marital
bed with the parents. Um, I think I've saved. I've
been doing this for ten years. I think I've saved
like six marriages. Sasha, back up a second. Okay, you
said you enter the marital bed. Yeah, what does that
mean the parents? All right, go on, what's your question?
(28:23):
I take back, by the way. I take back, by
the way, my compliment to you on your noble craft.
But my question is should I be charging extra for
this or does that like does that get into prostitution.
So you're leaving a trail of satisfied, more emotionally enriched
(28:44):
couples behind you everywhere you go, and you're emerging from
each of these relationships not only emotionally unscathed, but seemingly
more happy and fulfilled than you entered them. What I
need to ask you is, where's the rub here? Where
you have to be miserable? Some air? There's got to
be something that you're hiding from, obscuring, covering up. No
(29:05):
one is this fully sexually embodied and confident in real
life like there must be have. Did you sustain any
head injuries as a child, Not that I can remember.
Were you brought up in any sort of in an
experimental environment, like perhaps in a laboratory or strict it's
(29:27):
a solitarian regime. No. What do you look like? Can
you describe yourself to me? I look just like the
girl next door, I would say, you know, I'm five six,
average American lady hight. I have a little brown hair bob.
Do you have a little gap between your teeth that
reminds people of youth but also has a kind of alluring,
(29:50):
enigmatic erotic quality. But I like it when you say
it like that. What's your appeal? I don't know. I
think I just have like a really positive look on life.
How how do you have a positive outlook on life?
How are you able to look at this life and
feel positive? Probably because I'm sexually fulfilled. Don't you have
(30:11):
to have a positive outlook on life to be sexually
fulfilled in the first place. I mean, it's kind of
a chicken and egg I guess. Please don't drag chickens
into this. Chickens are a noble bird, a noble species,
and a famously monogamous species. I think that there's a
lot of good in the world. Well, I think there's
more going on here. I think there's got Usually when
(30:34):
people call me, and this is something we always get into,
they have the question, but then they have their real question,
which is the one that they haven't even asked themselves.
Right now, you're asking me something about transactional and I
guess potentially having to do with state statutes as well,
whether or not you would technically be considered a prostitute
for charging specifically for those services, although I guess if
(30:55):
you're a freelancer, I would just send an invoice for
consultancy and then probably be able to write off you
could probably even right off any of the sexy lingerie
or lubricant or whatever it is that you may bring
into the bed down. Yeah, I can recommend an accountant
for you. Believe me. I did the freelance thing for
(31:15):
a long time. I'm salaried now, which you know has
its disadvantages, But it was sometimes you gotta get in
bed with the devil to wake up in heaven. I
don't love talking about the devil. But let's talk about
like a ballpark number, Like what would you pay for
you and your wife to sleep with if I were
(31:36):
your nanny? Well again, I mean you, uh, you your
your girl next door? What do I look like in
this scenario? Am I me? Or am I a more
muscular version of me? Am I? Am I disgusted? Like? Like,
have you ever slept with a disgusting father or a
or a disgusting mother? No, everyone's pretty sexy. Well, then
(31:57):
I would say, I mean, I don't know what people
charge for um for nanny ing. The last time I
really had any kind of interaction UM with a kid
was we did a show live from a petting zoo
and it was a debacle. I'm a little out of
the loop in terms of of kids. So what do
you kids? No, I don't want to have kids. You
(32:19):
don't want to be a dad? No, I don't want
to be a dad. I'm not a dad. I'm not
anyone's dad. I just want to know what kinds of
problems are all these marriages having. What are you seeing
where you feel the need to step in and help
with your your your love hammer. Sometimes they just like
(32:40):
lose their spark. Well you say that you have injected
spark back into the relationship or what have you. You're
depriving them of the natural evolution of marriage, which is
they drift apart, and while they may despise each other
for the spoken resentments that they've all shared, they have
(33:02):
to stay together because of the child. This is what
marriage is supposed to be, Sasha. It's not designed to
be a fully intimately realized communing of the divine spirit
in all of us. That it's a contract between two people.
But that's that's a really outdated view of marriage. That's
(33:26):
like you know our parents stuff. Yeah, and our parents
were married, and their parents before they were married, and
their parents before them were married, and they all hated
each other by the end, and you know what, though,
they stayed together. That's what marriage is. That's why you
have to promise in front of a whole group of
your friends and family, Yeah, we're gonna do we know
(33:49):
this is gonna get bad right, sickness, health, all kinds
of other things that we have not even thought of yet.
And we are going to stay together despite the fact
that we don't like each other. And we're gonna promise
you right now because you will shame us. That's what
it's about. It's a great American tradition, and you are
(34:09):
interjecting yourself into something that has existed this way from millennia.
Is it possible that you jumping around from couple to couple,
relationship to relationship, feeling that you have fixed it the
only thing that's keeping you going. And as soon as
you run into a couple who you're unable to fix,
because hello, there's not a problem to begin with, the
(34:31):
problems with you, you're gonna realize that instead of fulfillment,
you have a great, big cavern of darkness that you've
been hiding from your entire life. Oh my god, I
never thought about it that way. Yeah, well that's the
only way I think about anything. So did I help
you with your with your with your problem? It's Leo
(34:55):
Green is my accountant. You can use him or his
You can do Leo at renaccounting dot com or actually
his son Ron at Green Accounting dot COM's who I use.
You might have more luck uh getting through to him.
He can set you up with all the s corps stuff.
Um you can, you can incorporate yourself. Trust me. In
the long run, it's a lot to get used to
it first. In a long run, you're gonna find it
(35:17):
helps you out. The freelance life is tough. Uh, okay, Sasha,
all right, well, okay, thank you for your call, Sasha.
Let's move on. All right, thank you very much. All right,
let me take a minute to thank one of our
sponsors here. Uh. One of today's sponsors Public Enemies Chuck
(35:41):
d N A home testing kids, the only d N
A kid that will make you say yeah boy when
you see the results, and as part of their funky
fresh ad by, I have personally agreed to test my
own d N. A pretty excited about that. Going to
find out how swag I am. It's an easy process.
(36:03):
You just open the package, take out the swab, You
swab your cheek oist swab in the container, seal it
up and give it to the s one ws just kidding.
I'm going to give mine to Shelly, who's sending it
out to the bomb Squad DNA testing lab. We should
get the results back from that on the next episode.
(36:30):
All right, we are coming to the end of the
show here, which is a great relief to me. Fitting
in a way that the topic was swinging. Because my
emotions swung rapidly from highs to lows over the course
of this very dramatic half hour. It was difficult to
(36:53):
hold in my vomit, and I will say, you know,
it was worth the emotional ups and down just to
be able to prove to that jerk Jeff f that
he was wrong and I was right. It's nice that
this was finally put to rest and we were at
last able to prove once and for all that I
(37:14):
do not have a daughter. And that's not just my opinion.
You can also take it from Amy Reese, who agreed
with me wholeheartedly that there was no way we could
be related. There was no ah hereditary bond between us.
There was no familial similarity between us, and I think
anybody who listened to the show would be able to
(37:36):
draw a similar conclusion. So that's gonna do it for
this show. I don't know if I was able to
help anybody out there. I know that I've been helped
having a little bit of closure to this terrible, terrible,
terrible chapter in my life. And I'm glad that this
daughter business can be put to rest forever. So until
(37:57):
next time, keep your mind open and your eyes closed.
I'm doctor Robert sex Reese. Make sure to rate, review,
and subscribe to The Doctor sex re Show wherever you
(38:18):
listen to your favorite podcasts.
Make sure to subscribe, rate, and review The Doctor sex
re Show wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts. On
today's episode of The Doctor Sex Reese Show, the Good
Doctor talks to a man who got burned trying to swing,
a podcaster drops a bombshell, and a naughty nanny has
(00:23):
money on our mind. And now the Doctor Sex Reath
Show with your host, Dr Robert sex Reese. This is
the Doctor Robert sex re Show. I'm Dr Robert sex Reese.
How can I help you today? Every caller that calls me,
I take as it's me or them. I don't like
(00:46):
that either, honestly, now that I'm hearing it come from you,
very excited to talk about this, Can you give me
a second? I'm choking on a walnut. Do you know
you're on the air. Can we just put aside our
differences and agree that I was right, very impatient to
hear your question, but also living in fear of I'm
throwing gems at you and you just keep dropping them
in the river. My situation is I'm doing what I love,
I'm free from human touch, and I'm here to give
(01:09):
what I have to you. Hello, everyone, Welcome to the
Doctor Sex re show. I'm your host, Dr Robert sex Reese.
Today's topic. I do not know what I did to
deserve this nightmare of a topic, but it is swinging.
As if one couple trying to rub or shove things
(01:30):
into each other is not enough. The thought of multiple
couples engaging in this is truly sickening. But I don't
have as much control over the show as I once did,
and I'm not complaining about that. But I gotta say,
in terms of swinging, the thing that really pardon my
French burns, my biscuits is that I used to love
going to my favorite city park under a full moon,
(01:54):
just sitting on a swing set and going to town
the gentle resistance to grab the only thing that gave
me a sense of calm in this world. But then,
about two years ago, I learned that swinging means also
to have multiple sexual partners, and that tiny sliver of
pleasure was drowned in a bucket of turpentine, which is
(02:15):
my least favorite way to drown and also my least
favorite way to pronounce turpentine. Also, I guess, as Shelley
points out, there's an important, uh topical, sort of timely
reason for this with you know, everybody is so involved
in politics and elections, the very important swinger vote, which
I guess from year to year can turn an election
(02:37):
on its head. I had no idea that's such grotesque.
People had such an influence on politics. So if you
are a swinger voter, thank you for thank you for
tuning in. But I do want to bring in our
first caller. We have someone here by the name of
Michael Demewski. Michael Demewski, you're on the air with Door
(02:58):
Sex Reese. What's your question? J Yeah, Hi, Hi, My
I'm calling because my fiance and I we were going
to swing with a couple, but we were misky. Your
full name Michael Arthur Demevski. Yeah, okay, because we generally
only give first names. But the way I read it here,
(03:19):
the way Shelley wrote it, I thought maybe Michael Domeski
was your full first name. No, Michael's fine. Okay, Well
it's the cats out of the bag already, Mike. So
I don't know if you want to call back with
a different identity or if you just want to keep
rolling through this because what you're about to say is
going to be on public record for all time. I'm
(03:41):
not worried about having my full name out there. I'm
I'm proud member of the community. And uh, it doesn't
What are you worried about? What? What are you worried about?
I mean, you know, climate change? Change? Are you talking
about in relation to swinging? No? No, just I I
already have had enough, honestly of swinging. Well can I
(04:04):
say my questions still? Yes? But then can we get
to climate change after? I mean, I guess I'd really
love to have my question and I'd really love to
have an inhabitable planet for my grandchildren. I mean, I
think you can. I'm worried about it. Okay, so maybe
that's a bigger issue than whatever you're about to bring up.
But I guess I don't know because, in fairness to
you haven't heard your question yet, So go ahead lay
(04:27):
it on me. My, my fiance and I were we
were going to swing with this couple new to the scene,
and uh so we decided to, you know, make a
night of it, and we wanted to rent out a big,
expensive hotel room for the night. Um so we rented
out the Starlight Casita suite at the Laquinta in and
(04:48):
uh that's pronoun Lakinah might be Laquinta. I don't I
don't speak Spanish, but I I but we were ghosted.
The other couple doesn't show up, and uh, you know,
he left us with no fun. And you know, I
was kind of annoyed because we had you know, we
had kind of fronted a lot. And so I this
(05:10):
is where my fiance and I had a disagreement because
I wanted to write these people in angry note my
fiance says, we we shouldn't be bothering them, We should
be understanding about an inexperienced couple, someone new to the
scene getting cold feet. So I just wanted to ask you,
who do you think is right? She's right? No, you're right.
That was a very quick Well I'm a little confused
(05:32):
about a lot of stuff. First of all, how did
you land on the hotel that you chose? What? What
was it about this place that you thought, yes, this
is the right environment for breaking God's law. I mean, doctor,
I feel a little I feel a little attacked, but
you are, Yes, you're being attacked. Yes, but well, if
(05:53):
you'll let me explain. Uh, the the lacina in in
our town is uh is sort of markedly nicer than
the Best Western, which is the other hotel that's near us.
So you really wanted to impress these people, or you
wanted to you wanted to give them, you want to
show them a good time to say to kind of
(06:14):
kind of pardon the expression, swing your dink a little
bit and be like, look, I'm ready, I'm ready to
lay down some sawbucks. I've never heard either of those expresses,
so that we can really get it on swing wise. Yeah,
sawbuck is a is a is a very cool, very
hip term for a ten dollar bill. Oh okay, well, yeah,
so I did want to lay down some sawbucks. How
(06:37):
do you know these guys? Where? How did you get
to the point where you felt comfortable enough to humiliate
you and your fiance to ask them to do this?
And then, of course I have to live through the terrible,
even worse humiliation of them not showing up. And now
you're on the air with everyone knowing your name. Well,
I'm totally comfortable having everyone know my name. I'd rather not,
(06:58):
you know, say too much about personally. I met them
at a work mixer. Specifically, we met the guy at
uh this work mixer, and sort of right away I
I was like, oh, he's you know what, this guy's
sort of a prime cut. And then when we met
his wife, uh, we felt the same, and my fiance
(07:20):
sort of started to initiate This is something I don't understand.
How do you even do you have to play it cool?
Are you guys constantly referring to swinging? This is the
thing that I don't like. It's it's a it's a
thing with any kind of community that gets way too
into anything, whether it's pokemon or bird watching or swinging.
Just like, yeah, we're part of the community. We swing,
We love to swing. Everything is about swinging. Do you
(07:42):
Are you always talking about swinging when you're swinging or
you're saying like, hey, we're swinging now, don't you enjoy
the swinging? I also love skiing, you know, we go
on ski trips. Let's get down to the brass tax.
How much did the hotel room cost for this night?
A night? Wow? So how did you get into swinging?
(08:04):
What's missing? What? What are you? What are you lacking here?
I feel like something's lacking well mostly other sexual partners.
Can you describe how they look without without giving without
giving away who they are even though you've practically shared
with me your social security and routing numbers. Just my name,
There's there's got to be other Michael Domevski's around me.
(08:25):
I don't think so. That's a very particular Macedonian sounding
name to me. I mean, it is a Macedonian name.
But there are just a decent Macedonian population where around
the country. Well, for one, Spokane, Washington. Is that where
you're calling from? Not for not necessarily. So you work
in logging, I'm trying to deduce a little bit more
(08:48):
about you here to figure out what is going on
with you. I work in HR for a logging company. Yes,
so this guy that you this prime cut of meat,
is he a lum ber jack? Well, again, I'm not
saying whether or not he works with me, but yes,
he is a lumberjack. Do you and your fiancee whose
(09:08):
name I don't want to know, do you to fight
about money a lot? No? We we generally live within
our means. We we do, okay, we do like to
splurge if we're gonna swing with people. That is a
disgusting sentence, which part of it is discussed. Well, splurge
didn't thrill me. What's wrong with splurge. I'm disgusted by
(09:30):
anything that has to do with intimacy, bodily function, all
of that stuff. There's other four. Look, intimacy is one
of the most overrated human conditions, right. It breeds contempt,
it breeds disappointment, it breeds bacteria. You're a sex therapist.
This is on me. I should have listened to an episode.
(09:50):
So what does this come down to for you? You You
you want you want these people to what pay you
the to split the four hundred sixt plus tax. Do
you want them to merely acknowledge that you spent all
this money and to apologize. What is it that you
want out of the situation, little Mikey d It's more
(10:12):
the second thing. I we were never going to ask
them to pay for half or anything like that. But
I was under the impression that I'd be, you know,
going to town on these two people that we met,
and you know, I'm disappointed that we didn't get to
and well, look here's what I think. I don't like
(10:33):
what this couple did to you. Tell them right now,
Tell them right now on the air. Assume they're listening
what you want them to feel? Fine, when you guys
did not show up to the star like casita suite
that my fiance and I reserve for us. It hurt
(10:54):
our feelings. Frankly, you didn't give us any notice. You do,
you just didn't show up. But it's just it, especially
it doesn't feel good you guys. Well, I'm mighty sorry, Michael.
I didn't realize your feelings will be hurt. We had
a family emergency we had to intend to. I guess
it just slipped my mind, and I do rightly apologize,
(11:17):
Timber all right, we feel good now, weirdly, yes, okay,
And you know what, I gotta tell you, it felt
kind of good to embody that kind of a character
for a little bit. There is that a thing you
do on the show? I mean, I'll do whatever it takes.
At first, it felt like you were mocking me, and uh,
(11:41):
I actually never thought of it that way. That I
don't know, you know, yeah, what their circumstances were, maybe
you can, maybe you can reach out to them and
do it through a lens of Hey, is everything okay
with you? Guys? Don't even bring up the swinging or
the substantial hotel bill that you're now stuck with, and
just make it about him. Make sure that everything's going
(12:04):
all right with him, and I think I would. I
think you're right, doctor, I think I will reach out. Okay,
So thanks Michael. I hope this was something for you.
I think it would thank you. All right. That was
Michael Demevsky of Spokane, Washington, works in HR for a
major logging company, and um, maybe I just helped him
(12:27):
stop being such a coward. We'll find out. This is
the Doctor sex re Show. I'm Dr Robert sex Reese. Alright,
I want to take a second here to thank one
of our sponsors. Guys, phones are filthy. They are just
crawling with bacteria, spit, and sewage vapor. That's why I
(12:51):
never used my phone without the Doctor sex Reese phone tongs.
Just pull out the tongs, use them to pick up
your smartphone out of your pocket or purse, and you
can talk to anyone from your therapist to the Pope,
confident that you are far away from that disease written
rectangle the Doctor sex Reese phone talks. You'll never have
(13:11):
to touch your phone again. Speaking of phones, let's go
back to the phones for our next caller. We have
someone on the line by the name of Amy. Hello, Amy,
or on The Doctor Sex Reese Show. The topic today
is swingers. How can I help you? Hi, Amy Reese.
(13:35):
Oh that's funny, Hi Amy, I'm Dr sex Reese. Oh interesting.
Why would you choose such a disgusting middle name? I
didn't actually choose it, but it is. It's legally I
have to go by that name when I'm on the air.
But yeah, I don't like saying it, um, but I
guess I learned a long time ago how to how
to bury that deep down. You know. I'm glad that
(13:56):
you buried it, and it's not something that you wear
on your sleeve, because you live in a world that
is severely too horny for its own good, and that
is something that I'm trying to take a stand against.
Oh you are, Yeah, in your in your personal life,
you've been taking a stand against horny nous. Oh completely.
It's refreshing to talk to a young person who's who's
(14:17):
so revolted by sex. Can I ask how old you are? Yeah?
I am twenty two. I like I like you, Amy.
I rarely say that to uh, to a caller or
a person, but I like you. I like your attitude
right right off the bat, You're coming out swinging and uh,
(14:39):
and I happened to uh to agree with the direction
you're punching in And speaking of swinging, that is today's topic.
Did you have a question about that? I actually prefer
seesaws as opposed to swings. Oh, I see, so you're
talking about the act of swing, like a swing on
a playground. What else recurring to? Okay, well, in the again,
(15:04):
it's a sex related term. But um, sometimes married overweight
couples will get together with other married overweight couples and
they will have sex with each other. Yeah. Oh, it's
an interesting thing, Dr Reese that you like Amy Reese's personality,
Amy Reese, do anything for you. I'm hoping this is
(15:30):
not related to that interesting thing happened on a previous show.
Somebody called and accused me of being the father to
a woman named Amy Reese, who now that I'm just
make an eye contact with Shelly is twenty two. Did
you ever work at the tc B? Y that? Okay?
I'm I'm assuming a man, a nefarious man by the
(15:54):
name of Jeff f contacted you and filled your head
with lies? Is that is that pretty close? What do
you want to know, Amy Reese? Listen? I have a
questionnaire here that will confirm that you are, not, in fact,
my father. I like where you're going with this, that
it's going to confirm that I'm not your dad. Yeah,
(16:14):
this is the dumb asked daddy quiz. It is to
confirm that you are not mine or anyone's father. You
take this, we prove you're not my dad, and we
all go home happy. How does that sound? That sounds great?
I would love to go home happy. Has not happened
in twenty three years, but maybe tonight's tonight. Let's do
the questionnaire. All right, Daddy's dear cast listeners, here we go. Name.
(16:38):
My name is Dr Robert Ruth Sex Reese. Are you
now or have you ever been? My father? No? Do
you consider yourself emotionally open? No? Do you know? Have
you ever enjoyed sexual relations with my mother Genevieve Reese?
Absolutely not. When is the last time you read someone
to sleep? I have had a very distraught listener just
(16:59):
last week. Actually, I had to read, uh read this lye.
I read the d S M five to him? Did
they want you to read that to them? Unclear? Have
you ever blacked out? Yes? I blacked out for a
six month period in When is the last time you
changed to tire? If I get a spare tire, I
(17:22):
leave the car there and I walk away and then
somebody takes care of it. Have Triple A? I do
have Triple A? Are you aware that Triple A is
currently running a special promotion for qualified customers to upgrade
to a Platinum membership for the low annual rate of
That actually sounds really good, Triple A Piece of mind,
(17:43):
mile after mile, Welcome back to the Daddy Dear Cast.
How was that for you? Dr Reese? Are you literally
recording a podcast right now? Yeah, the Daddy Dear Cast podcast. Okay, Well,
I mean I know what I I understand the grind.
I mean, I'm hosting a day the show here. But
don't you think there's some ethical concerns with recording a
(18:03):
podcast while somebody else is having you on their own show.
When you have a podcast and you get a call
saying that your father is Dr sex Reese, I think
you jump at the chance for a good podcast. Okay.
I have to ask you, Amy, how it was that
you came to be in touch with me and to
(18:26):
call in today. Was this something you did of your
own volition? Or did one of my producers, maybe Shelly,
track you down and try to get you to call Yeah,
really sweet lady she got in touch with me, said hey,
I think this guy is your dad. And I said, okay, okay,
Well she is not a sweet lady. She's one of
(18:47):
the great deceivers. And I'm gonna put you on hold
for just a second. Amy, I'll be right back. I
just gotta remount my producer real quick. Okay, Shelly, what's
happening here? Please tell me? Tell me on air, explain
to the listeners what's happening here? Okay, Um, you had
a caller a few weeks ago who brought up this claim,
(19:10):
and as a producer of this show, it is my
job to research that claim. And my research led me
to Amy, who you were just talking to. Yes, but
you did it in such a way that I feel deceived,
and I think, and I think the audience probably feels deceived. Well,
(19:30):
I apologize that you feel deceived. So you thought that
you would just have her call in, watch me melt down,
and then laugh your way to the bank. Somehow, I'm
not laughing. And you also didn't melt down. You guys
had a really genuine connection. But I'm about but I'm
in the midst of melting down right now. I'm seething.
(19:52):
I'm seething. Well, I'm I'm sorry that you think I'm
the source of that. You are clear, there's no You're
definitively the source of it. I was listening to the
conversation and I think, with almost no shadow of a doubt,
that that girl is your daughter. No way, you're wrong.
(20:13):
It seems as though you want to move on. Yes,
So let's get our next caller in here, please. Okay,
So the options are a couple who hosted an orgy
at their home and after everyone left and they were
cleaning up, they realized someone had pooped in their jacuzzi. Well,
you know, I can't do that, Shelly, I don't know that.
(20:36):
It's a it's an episode about swinging, and they hosted
a party and they had property. Damn. I don't like swinging,
I don't like parties, and I don't like defecation. These
are like the three main things. That's the first thing
we talked about, Okay, at our very first meeting. I
like with that, Okay, crossing them off. No poop in
(20:57):
the hot tub, that's it. Those are all the calls.
Well there's Amy, fine, Amy, can you hear us right now?
I can hear you, but I haven't really been listening. Okay,
that's terrific. That's terrific. So you're so Shelly betray me
and you don't even know how to operate aboard. Weren't
you the one saying you were going to put her
on hold? Yeah, but I don't know what I'm doing here. Okay, Sorry,
(21:20):
I didn't realize you don't know anything. Um, Hi, Amy,
it's Shelly. We we met earlier. Yeah, you're the reason
this whole, uh, this whole story that is turning into
a very non story happened. How's it going? Thank you?
It's going well. So, now that I have both of you,
I thought it might be interesting, fun, illuminating, or at best,
(21:45):
really end this controversy. If if I could just ask
you Bill some questions and then we can just put
this whole thing to bed right now. I mean, I'm
totally okay with doing a question air type quiz um,
but before we do that, I would just love for you,
Shelly to say how much you enjoy the Daddy Dear
(22:08):
Cast podcast. I do enjoy it. I'm a new listener.
I mean I I strenuously object to this ethically, but
I think Shelly, what Amy's asking for is for you
to I d yourself so that you can use it
as a promo in the in the podcast. I'm Shelly
from The Doctor Sex Show. I got it. I got it. Hello,
(22:29):
I'm Shelly from the Doctor Sex Reese Show. And I
know amazing content when I hear it, and that is
what I found with Amy's podcast. I think you probably
have to say the name of the podcast, right, Daddy
deer Cast, Daddy deer Cast, Daddy dear Cast. Do you
want me to do one for you just so you
have it? Oh? That would be amazing. So this is
(22:52):
a big moment. I hope my listeners are have their
ears personal. I'm just gonna do it as one pro
to another. You're listening to the Daddy Deer Cast, the
only podcast that delves into the father complex hidden beneath
each man. I'm Dr Sex Reese. Keep on listening. That
was better than your promos for your own show. Do
you stop? Thank you so much? I think we're good. Okay,
(23:16):
so you guys want to answer some fun questions? Yeah,
I mean I've completely lost any control of the show,
so why not hand it over now to my producer.
I mean, I've just done a promo for for you know,
I guess a rival, right, um? Question Number one favorite hobby, Amy,
I like to knit schalls for friends. I like to
(23:39):
do I like to do a string art for friends.
Favorite potato, Yeah, sweet potatoes. Isn't it funny how at
the grocery store sometimes like the yams and the sweet
potatoes are all together and you're like, I don't even
know which one I want. Yeah, they're totally different, though
I don't know. I find confusing and very negligent on
(24:03):
the part of the grocery store. I've complained numerous times.
See Shelley, this is like, are you feeling silly yet? No?
I think you guys are something like you're having a
nice time doing this questionnaire. To be honest, your greatest fear?
What was that again? Okay, Well that was all my
(24:25):
questions and you didn't have a single and I don't
think we had a single answer that was the same. Well, Amy,
unless you know, you have anything else you need to
get done for your show during my show, I'd kind
of like to wrap up this call. What do you think, Shelley,
I mean, I think it's pretty clear to everybody out
there that I think it's crystal clear that we have
(24:50):
common that I may like her as a person and
feel a kind of a connection to her, But in
terms of any of that sort of genetic or or
personality workers and traits that you might look for and
a father and a daughter, they're just not here. They're
just not here. And you tried to set up a
trap for us, Shelly, you betrayed me, and you tried
to set up a tiger trap, and it failed. The
(25:13):
tiger jumped over the trap. And Amy, if you want
to keep in touch, I would love to. If you
need a mentor, or if you just want somebody to
bounce some ideas off of, or you know, I do
have this anti kissing club at my college that I
think that you would be a great speaker for I
would actually love to. Okay, Well, hopefully, Amy, thank you
so much. Hopefully this puts an end to this ridiculous controversy.
(25:39):
Thank you. Yes, I feel very relieved that the father
once again um eludes me. Yeah, the search for the
father goes on. I wish you the best of luck
with that or maybe the worst of luck. Shelley, you
and I are going to talk again during the during
the commercial break. Looking forward to it. Okay, me too.
(26:01):
We're gonna take a break now, Thank you all. We'll
be back in a minute. I would like to take
a minute to think one of our sponsors, ex Caliber Condoms.
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(26:22):
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of the top five colors of all time. Every morning
at six and six thirty. Yeah, Yeah, let's welcome our
(27:09):
third and hopefully final caller of the show. I have
Sasha on the line. Sasha, thanks for calling The Doctor
Sex Reese Show. Today's topic is swinging. How can I
help you? Hi? So my question, I've been working as
a nanny and one of the notable profession to bring
(27:33):
someone into your home and to trust them with that
degree of certainty. Uh wow, I could never do it.
I could never trust anyone that much. But I applaud
you on your work. Thank you. So one of the
things that I offer is, in an effort to bring
(27:55):
the flame back into their marriage, I enter the marital
bed with the parents. Um, I think I've saved. I've
been doing this for ten years. I think I've saved
like six marriages. Sasha, back up a second. Okay, you
said you enter the marital bed. Yeah, what does that
mean the parents? All right, go on, what's your question?
(28:23):
I take back, by the way. I take back, by
the way, my compliment to you on your noble craft.
But my question is should I be charging extra for
this or does that like does that get into prostitution.
So you're leaving a trail of satisfied, more emotionally enriched
(28:44):
couples behind you everywhere you go, and you're emerging from
each of these relationships not only emotionally unscathed, but seemingly
more happy and fulfilled than you entered them. What I
need to ask you is, where's the rub here? Where
you have to be miserable? Some air? There's got to
be something that you're hiding from, obscuring, covering up. No
(29:05):
one is this fully sexually embodied and confident in real
life like there must be have. Did you sustain any
head injuries as a child, Not that I can remember.
Were you brought up in any sort of in an
experimental environment, like perhaps in a laboratory or strict it's
(29:27):
a solitarian regime. No. What do you look like? Can
you describe yourself to me? I look just like the
girl next door, I would say, you know, I'm five six,
average American lady hight. I have a little brown hair bob.
Do you have a little gap between your teeth that
reminds people of youth but also has a kind of alluring,
(29:50):
enigmatic erotic quality. But I like it when you say
it like that. What's your appeal? I don't know. I
think I just have like a really positive look on life.
How how do you have a positive outlook on life?
How are you able to look at this life and
feel positive? Probably because I'm sexually fulfilled. Don't you have
(30:11):
to have a positive outlook on life to be sexually
fulfilled in the first place. I mean, it's kind of
a chicken and egg I guess. Please don't drag chickens
into this. Chickens are a noble bird, a noble species,
and a famously monogamous species. I think that there's a
lot of good in the world. Well, I think there's
more going on here. I think there's got Usually when
(30:34):
people call me, and this is something we always get into,
they have the question, but then they have their real question,
which is the one that they haven't even asked themselves.
Right now, you're asking me something about transactional and I
guess potentially having to do with state statutes as well,
whether or not you would technically be considered a prostitute
for charging specifically for those services, although I guess if
(30:55):
you're a freelancer, I would just send an invoice for
consultancy and then probably be able to write off you
could probably even right off any of the sexy lingerie
or lubricant or whatever it is that you may bring
into the bed down. Yeah, I can recommend an accountant
for you. Believe me. I did the freelance thing for
(31:15):
a long time. I'm salaried now, which you know has
its disadvantages, But it was sometimes you gotta get in
bed with the devil to wake up in heaven. I
don't love talking about the devil. But let's talk about
like a ballpark number, Like what would you pay for
you and your wife to sleep with if I were
(31:36):
your nanny? Well again, I mean you, uh, you your
your girl next door? What do I look like in
this scenario? Am I me? Or am I a more
muscular version of me? Am I? Am I disgusted? Like? Like,
have you ever slept with a disgusting father or a
or a disgusting mother? No, everyone's pretty sexy. Well, then
(31:57):
I would say, I mean, I don't know what people
charge for um for nanny ing. The last time I
really had any kind of interaction UM with a kid
was we did a show live from a petting zoo
and it was a debacle. I'm a little out of
the loop in terms of of kids. So what do
you kids? No, I don't want to have kids. You
(32:19):
don't want to be a dad? No, I don't want
to be a dad. I'm not a dad. I'm not
anyone's dad. I just want to know what kinds of
problems are all these marriages having. What are you seeing
where you feel the need to step in and help
with your your your love hammer. Sometimes they just like
(32:40):
lose their spark. Well you say that you have injected
spark back into the relationship or what have you. You're
depriving them of the natural evolution of marriage, which is
they drift apart, and while they may despise each other
for the spoken resentments that they've all shared, they have
(33:02):
to stay together because of the child. This is what
marriage is supposed to be, Sasha. It's not designed to
be a fully intimately realized communing of the divine spirit
in all of us. That it's a contract between two people.
But that's that's a really outdated view of marriage. That's
(33:26):
like you know our parents stuff. Yeah, and our parents
were married, and their parents before they were married, and
their parents before them were married, and they all hated
each other by the end, and you know what, though,
they stayed together. That's what marriage is. That's why you
have to promise in front of a whole group of
your friends and family, Yeah, we're gonna do we know
(33:49):
this is gonna get bad right, sickness, health, all kinds
of other things that we have not even thought of yet.
And we are going to stay together despite the fact
that we don't like each other. And we're gonna promise
you right now because you will shame us. That's what
it's about. It's a great American tradition, and you are
(34:09):
interjecting yourself into something that has existed this way from millennia.
Is it possible that you jumping around from couple to couple,
relationship to relationship, feeling that you have fixed it the
only thing that's keeping you going. And as soon as
you run into a couple who you're unable to fix,
because hello, there's not a problem to begin with, the
(34:31):
problems with you, you're gonna realize that instead of fulfillment,
you have a great, big cavern of darkness that you've
been hiding from your entire life. Oh my god, I
never thought about it that way. Yeah, well that's the
only way I think about anything. So did I help
you with your with your with your problem? It's Leo
(34:55):
Green is my accountant. You can use him or his
You can do Leo at renaccounting dot com or actually
his son Ron at Green Accounting dot COM's who I use.
You might have more luck uh getting through to him.
He can set you up with all the s corps stuff.
Um you can, you can incorporate yourself. Trust me. In
the long run, it's a lot to get used to
it first. In a long run, you're gonna find it
(35:17):
helps you out. The freelance life is tough. Uh, okay, Sasha,
all right, well, okay, thank you for your call, Sasha.
Let's move on. All right, thank you very much. All right,
let me take a minute to thank one of our
sponsors here. Uh. One of today's sponsors Public Enemies Chuck
(35:41):
d N A home testing kids, the only d N
A kid that will make you say yeah boy when
you see the results, and as part of their funky
fresh ad by, I have personally agreed to test my
own d N. A pretty excited about that. Going to
find out how swag I am. It's an easy process.
(36:03):
You just open the package, take out the swab, You
swab your cheek oist swab in the container, seal it
up and give it to the s one ws just kidding.
I'm going to give mine to Shelly, who's sending it
out to the bomb Squad DNA testing lab. We should
get the results back from that on the next episode.
(36:30):
All right, we are coming to the end of the
show here, which is a great relief to me. Fitting
in a way that the topic was swinging. Because my
emotions swung rapidly from highs to lows over the course
of this very dramatic half hour. It was difficult to
(36:53):
hold in my vomit, and I will say, you know,
it was worth the emotional ups and down just to
be able to prove to that jerk Jeff f that
he was wrong and I was right. It's nice that
this was finally put to rest and we were at
last able to prove once and for all that I
(37:14):
do not have a daughter. And that's not just my opinion.
You can also take it from Amy Reese, who agreed
with me wholeheartedly that there was no way we could
be related. There was no ah hereditary bond between us.
There was no familial similarity between us, and I think
anybody who listened to the show would be able to
(37:36):
draw a similar conclusion. So that's gonna do it for
this show. I don't know if I was able to
help anybody out there. I know that I've been helped
having a little bit of closure to this terrible, terrible,
terrible chapter in my life. And I'm glad that this
daughter business can be put to rest forever. So until
(37:57):
next time, keep your mind open and your eyes closed.
I'm doctor Robert sex Reese. Make sure to rate, review,
and subscribe to The Doctor sex re Show wherever you
(38:18):
listen to your favorite podcasts.
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