July 5, 2024 • 37 mins
The Eds go THERE when it comes to sex and intimacy.
Sex before and after marriage, toys, THAT number, and how many times a week is normal… Edwin and Eddie honestly answer what women want to know
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is the Eds with Eddie Judge and Edwin Aoyavi.
The husbands know best too Cheese Production.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
We are back for episode eight and we're going to
talk about a topic that a lot of ladies would
like to hear or get a male perspective on. This
is sex and intimacy. Yes, I said it, sex and intimacy.
And when do men not want to talk about sex?
Do you know? What do you think? And when?
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Because we get in trouble if we talk about it.
I'm actually so fearful right now. I feel like I'm
going to get in trouble talk Come on.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
Oh, I love talking about sex with my wife. Although
I got to say my wife is a conservative one
in the relationship. So you know, when the kids are
around and I kiss on her and I love on her,
the kids are like ew, she pushes me away. I'm like,
it's natural. This is what couples do. And intimacy is
so important in my opinion when it comes to relationships, right.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
It's very important. I mean, it's it's a big deal.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Here's here's our first question. Okay, what do sex mean
to you before marriage? Before you were married, when you
met someone new, how quick did you know you wanted
to sleep with them?
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Interesting question. I can tell you this. The the women
that I loved and I really really liked, the last
thing on my mind was having sex with them. Now,
if I was just physically attracted to them, but that
was it.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
Because there's some girls I was physically attracted to, but
I just knew that they weren't the relationship type or
as I called it, girlfriend material or wife material. Yeah,
like those girls I wanted a break in first night,
let's go.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
I was a very visual person. So you know, if
if I was very physically attracted and that's all I
cared about, I I that's all I thought about. But
what I found, the awareness of it was the girls
that I really really wanted to like have a relationship with. Really,
(02:10):
for me, the last thing on my mind when I
went on that first state was having sex with Yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
And I think I have to clarify something because growing
up as a young man and full of hormones, especially
in your teens, you want to hump every chick you meet,
especially a hot chick or you know, a check that
you're very attracted to. So it took me, you know,
(02:36):
going through relationships where I was in love and it
was intimate, and learning what intimacy was for me, you know,
what does it mean to be physically in bed with
a woman and what are we doing here? Is it
just a physical act or is there a love or
a connection there? Right? So I think I had two
(02:59):
deep intimate relationships, maybe three before I met Tarma, and
then I've had a few relationships where it was just
strictly sex, you know, like they make movies of it,
just friends and it's just a sexual thing, no intimacy.
And I learned that the just sex relationships didn't mean
(03:20):
anything and they felt kind of empty, right. I just
didn't feel good about it. But I wasn't ready to
get into an intimate relationship, but I wanted to be physically,
you know, physical with this relationship. So there were a
couple of relationships like that in my life where you know,
it was just a sexual thing. Yeah, we'd go out
(03:42):
to dinner, but it was not love, it was not intimate.
And I think what happened with Tarma is there was
instant attraction, instant love that and by then when I
met her, I had already figured out that I don't
want to be in a just plain sexual relationship. I
want to be in a loving, intimate relationship, but deep connection.
(04:06):
That was really important to me. Right. That was like, like,
when you're going to get into a relationship, you got
to make sure that there's chemistry. You're not just physically
attracted to this person. You are like deep down in
love and in your heart connected with this person. Because
there's been, you know, instances in my life where I've
had sex and you roll over and you're like, Okay,
(04:27):
get off my bed, get out of my life. I
don't want anything to do with you, right, And it's
so dirty, it's so empty, and I don't like it.
So I never wanted to experience that. And I just
love being connected with Camera. I love the connection I
have with her. And it's like you said, the last
thing I thought about, Well, maybe not the last thing.
(04:48):
Maybe the second thing I thought about with her was
having sex. But the connection I had with her initially
was overwhelmingly attracted to her. And then I found out
she was married, so that kind of shut down everything. Yeah,
and I said, well, you know, I'm not going to
go there. But when we started spending time together and
(05:12):
in the same parties, in the same rooms, and talking
to her and just having conversations with her. That's what
really led me to really get to know her and
see there's more to this woman than just a sexual attraction.
And it wasn't until you know, she was divorced that
I got the opportunity to take her on her first date.
And I don't even think we had sex on our
(05:33):
first date, our official date. It was just like, let's
go out, get to get get to know each other.
We go to La Jolla and nobody knows what's there
and hopefully nobody knows her. And you know, we came
home and I dropped her off, and it was it
was a very respectful in my book, what I call
respectful when you go on a date and you and
you take the girl out and you take her home
(05:54):
and maybe you give her a kiss, but you know,
for the most part, you just show her that I'm
in this for just the sexual part of it. I'm
in this because I am connected with you and I
want to get to know you and everything about you.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
Yeah, you know, to clarify right when you for me,
when you when I really like someone, the last thing
on my mind was having sex with them. But if
they wanted to have sex the first date. I was
all game. Yeah, I mean that's how I met my wife. Yeah, right,
So we ended up, you know, hooking up the first day. Now,
(06:33):
funny enough, I remember that night we hooked up. You know,
we're both sort of kind of drunk wasted that night
and I was giving her a kiss, saying goodbye to her,
and I was putting her in the taxi, and then
she grabbed me and pulled me into the taxi. So
I was like, all right, I guess we're going home.
But I wasn't even planning on it. I was just like,
all right, we'll see you tomorrow. And anyways, I'm glad
(06:54):
she pulled me in because you just never know. Things
happen in life, and who knows what the next day
would have looked like. We probably would have forgot about
me and we wouldn't be here today. So you just
never know. You know what's interesting too, So funny story
since we're talking about sex and partners and all that.
So I don't know if you went through this, But
like whenever I was intimate with someone or I had
(07:17):
sex with someone for whatever reason, whenever I would ask
them how many men they slept with. They always told
me three, so I was always number three. So then
I'm just like, at some point I'm like, are these
girls lying to me? Or my ego was like maybe
I am the third because I was. I'm just so
(07:39):
good they couldn't help themselves. And I guess they slept
with me the first night and I'm their third guy, right, So.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
They read that off of US magazine or one of
those stupid magazines that tells you how to you know,
make a guy happy and lie to him.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
I'm telling you, say we shit. Every girl would tell
me three, right, so you know when I sleep when
Teddy and I hooked up, of course I go and
ask the question. And I'm thinking I'm going to be numbers,
I think, I think. So I'm like, how many men
have you slept with?
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Right? And yeah, I'm.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
Thinking she's going to tell me three, because that's what
every girl has always told me.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
Man, when she told me that number, I was like, what,
I like, want to go to the doctor right away?
And I was like, what, by the way, she told
me I could share the number? She did? Yeah, I
asked her, I can, oh, okay, do you want to
guess what her number was no, because I'll get in trouble.
(08:38):
I just tell me it was seventeen.
Speaker 3 (08:41):
Seventeen, Okay, I was like what I was like, But
you know now, I'm like, it's a lot more than seven.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
I know there's a woman out there that it's a
lot more than seventeen. But all I heard was three.
So when I heard seventeen, I was shocked.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
That's funny.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
I think they're funny. Yeah, maybe the most had heard
a girl tell me before it was four. But the
flip side of that, I'm like, all right, she's honest.
Girls wouldn't have told me that, so it actually earned
her a point being honest.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
Well, that's a good positive way of looking at it.
I mean, you know, it's all how you look at it.
I asked those questions when I was younger, and I
paid close attention on how it made me feel, and
the women that were honest, you know, I was like,
oh shit, you've had ten guys, I'm eleven. You know,
it didn't feel good. It didn't feel good at all.
(09:32):
So I learned quickly. You know what when that conversation
comes up, because inevitably it always came up, right, It's
kind of like what do you do for a living?
You just got to ask how many guys have you had?
I learned not to ask those questions, and when they
did come up, I just said, you know, I don't
want to know. I really rather not know and think
(09:55):
that I am the first guy that you've ever been with,
even though you got four kids behind you know, I
want to be the first guy that you've that you've
been with, and and just you know, be in my
denial world and be in love with you, and and
and that's all that matters to me. I don't care
how many guys you've been with it because honestly, it
doesn't matter. You know, it's what's happening today.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Exactly. Do you use any kind of is it just
eddie all the time? Or do you do you bring
in like toys and stuff to the relationship.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
No, we've we've bought toys into the relationship. We recently
purchased a sex chair where we call it a sex
chair officially it's a yoga chair, and you know, we've
used it once or twice since we've bought it, and
it's just it's really comfortable. It makes for a really
incredible sexual experience. And I I would love to use
(10:52):
it more. But what I've what I've recycled it for is,
like I said, it's a yoga chair, so I like
to use it to stretch my back. It's our sex
chair turned into a back chair recently. And she's like,
what are you doing. I'm like, I'm stretching my back.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
It feels good. Yeah, you know, it's interesting about the
whole toy thing. So, you know, Teddy and I have
been together, you know now, I think going on fifteen years,
we're about to celebrate thirteen years, and we've never used
any kind of toys, right, So about six months ago,
I think it was, she's like, hey, do you want
(11:29):
to start using these like ring you know, I think
they're called cock rings or whatever they're called. Yes, And
I kind of got offended. I was like, what am
I not good enough anymore? Like you're bringing in some
toys here, Like, do.
Speaker 2 (11:42):
You not say you might never use the cock ring?
Speaker 1 (11:47):
Never? I'd never used the cock ring before.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
Oh dude, it's crazy. That's a big old bulge hard
on for hours. It's like you don't even have to
try to keep it hard. It's crazy.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
Right, So it's like my first time using it. But
it's it's funny how the ego works sometimes. I was like, yeah, what,
like I could do just fine. I could satisfy you
just fine by myself. What are you talking about that
I need to throw something on. But we've actually been
having a pretty good time with it actually, so yeah,
it took us. Funny, it took us a long time
(12:18):
to use some toys. So she.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Teddy, I think sent my wife those cock rings for
us to try. And it's funny because I don't know
if they're going to air it, but we were we
were filming at the house, just sitting on the on
the bed talking and all of a sudden, my wife
pulls out the cock ring and it's it's it lights
up and it's got a little vibrate right, and and
(12:42):
I'm like, this is not going to be tight enough
for me. You need a smaller one. We started playing
around with it and just joking and it was it
was I hope they air it because it was such
a funny scene, funny awkward scene, but yeah, the ego
jumped in. I'm like, I'm not putting this thing on.
I don't need it. And then plus, what's a little
(13:04):
vibration gonna do.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
All right, So so check this out. So so, I
we probably have a lot of single women that that
listened to this show, right, and some of them might
want to date younger guys. I mean, you've been seeing
it more and more and more. Right, So, when you
were younger and you met maybe somebody that was older
(13:27):
that had way more experience than you did, did that
intimidate you?
Speaker 2 (13:31):
No, that attracted me more. The funny thing about my life,
in my relationships with my girls, is that I've always
been attracted to older women. And I used to wonder why,
but I always thought it's because there's so much to
learn in life, and particularly was about, yeah, how to
(13:54):
how to make a woman happy in bed, you know,
sexually intimately, And I learned it. I mean I think
I was eighteen and a girlfriend at the time was
like twenty five years old, and she taught me a lot.
You know, most of the older women's made the first
move and they taught me, you know, how to pleasure them.
(14:16):
So I think it's a good thing.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
That's awesome. By the way, what how many dates did
it take you to have sex with town? I know
you guys had to wait because she was married. But
how many dates do you think you went on before
you were into.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
I think it was after the first date. Yeah, it
wasn't too long after. Like I said, there was a
physical attraction as well. But if I'm to go back
to the initial reason I fell in love with her,
I literally open up the front door of my house
because they came to film at my house and we
got eye to eye contact and it was love and
birds and hearts and.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
It was bizarre.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
It was love at first sight. And then after I
got past her eyes, I saw her body and her
phys and then her personality and everything just was like,
oh my god, this woman is amazing. And then we
find out she's married. Dab it. So that was that
was literally the first experience with my wife. And it wasn't,
(15:16):
like I said, it wasn't until seven or eight months
later that we actually got a chance to explore that
that initial feeling, that that solidified. Okay, this is this
is the one. This is who I'm going to spend
the rest of the time my life with.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
Yeah, so after thirteen years, don't tell us what we
want to hear, tell us the truth here. How many
times a week do you guys have sex.
Speaker 2 (15:45):
We probably average once a week, you know, we we
we obviously, And I remember when we first started filming.
We used to have six hour sessions. It was incredible.
But I was younger, had a lot more stam you.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
Know, a lot less stress back then too, Probably less stress.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
Yeah, but I also felt probably that I had to perform,
you know, because it was so important to me to
have such a solid intimate relationship. I think mostly because
I knew that eventually it's got to be more than sex.
It's got to be more than this. So there's got
(16:27):
to be something other than just the physical act of
having sex that's gonna give us longevity in our marriage.
And I want to say it might have been two
or three years ago when that transition started happening, where
sex wasn't the biggest priority anymore, maybe even four years ago,
(16:48):
where it was like, Okay, you're working hard, I'm working hard,
where you know, we have very little time. And I
don't know if she felt this way, but I felt like,
you know what, I'm I'm solid. I am confident that
I'm going to be with this one for the rest
of my life because every single time, and I'm talking
every single time we make love, it's like the very
first time we made love. I just and I tell
(17:10):
it like it's incredible, and I know that when the
act happens, we're going to have that same for the
first time experience for the rest of our life. Right,
So it doesn't have to happen every day, and it
doesn't have to be a chore, right, it just it
just has to happen when she feels it and I
(17:30):
feel it, and we make it happen. But we don't
force it. We don't make it happen. And lately it's
it's I mean, I've gone even two weeks without having
sex with her.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
But I was going to say, what's been the longest
have you ever gotten in a rut? Or what's been
the longest that you've gone without.
Speaker 2 (17:50):
I probably would say I've gone without maybe two to
three months. And that was during my heart issue. That
was when I was having heart issues and I my
life was upside down. I couldn't exercise, I couldn't do
anything that brought any joy to me physically, mentally, emotionally.
It kind of took a back seat, right it was.
Speaker 1 (18:12):
It was tragic.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
But then again, like I said, I still had the
confidence that she's going to be there for me regardless
of whether we have sex or not, because she's here,
she's helping me, she's going to the doctor visits with me,
she's here, you know, living through this with me. So
it kinda just it was one of those things like
it's not a big priority, it's not the top of
(18:35):
mind that I want to think about right now. And
that was a long time because I think that was
probably also around the same time I experienced about of depression,
which I've never experienced before. I'm a positive guy and
I like to spend every negative situation into a positive situation.
That's always helped me be who I am. And that
(18:55):
was the very first time where everything was just coming
down on me and I was didn't want want to
do anything, didn't want to I couldn't go to work,
I had to hire a manager to run the gym.
I couldn't work out, I couldn't ride my bike, and
riding my bike was second to having sex with my wife,
you know, it's like the best, my favorite thing to do.
And I realized this is this is not me, man.
(19:17):
I don't like being like this. I don't look I
don't like who I am. So that's probably the longest
I've ever been without with her, you know, being intimate
with her. But but yeah, it's to me, it's it's
it's there. I know it's always going to be incredible.
We've I don't think, no, we've never had a bad
(19:38):
sex session. Honestly, it's always just been great. And and
there's no insecurities about that, right And and I think
that's probably why I you know, we we we tried
some toys. We tried some we tried the sex table
or the bed I bought her, you know, I went,
I went to a sex shop by my self to
(20:00):
go check it out. And that was a pretty interesting experience, like, okay,
tell me about all these things here, and and the
lady was very you know, ANIMI animated and excited to
tell me and educate me on all how all these
things work. And uh, and that's when I learned about
butt plugs. People use butt plugs.
Speaker 1 (20:20):
For I don't know, arouse them.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
And it looks like like a spaceship that's about this
big and it goes up your butt and and that's it.
I guess that's that's what it does. Like I don't
see any pleasure in that. So I know that people
have been telling me before that, uh, there's an orogen
and sown and men.
Speaker 1 (20:44):
Like I was gonna say, is that for female or
for male?
Speaker 2 (20:47):
It's it's for both. But apparently men have it too,
where you could reach climax by you know, tickling this
certain part, like to call it the clitoris of the male.
I mean, I mean that's I guess why gay guys
yeah like it, right, I mean they don't. They don't
deal with coltaoruses.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
I have a friend who's single who swears by it.
He's been trying to get me to do it. I just, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah,
it's the best thing ever.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
I have no interest in it.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:16):
I always say there's there's a tattoo, the only tattoo
I have, and it'sprked by my asshole that says exit
only that's all it says. But yeah, I mean toys
are they could be fun.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
I learned that you can use these what otherwise look
like dusters that you know, the house cleaners used to
dust your your house. You can use that to arouse
the body, you know, just light touch. So there's a
lot of different ways to explore our sexual life that
I'm open to except butt plus and nothing's going on
(21:51):
my butt.
Speaker 1 (21:52):
Yeah, Sam, I agreed on that. You know, Teddy and I,
I was going to say Teddy and I we were
probably two a week. We go twice and when it's
scheduled too, which I'd love because she's busy, I'm busy,
and we're both attracted to each other, so it's not
like we have to feel in the mood. And you know,
when you have children, you kind of have to schedule
(22:14):
it right, And I get in my head, like I
hate being intimate with my wife if the kids are home.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
Yeah, me too, Like I.
Speaker 1 (22:21):
Gotta like try to stay quiet and my back. In
the back of my mind, I'm like, what if they
walk in? Yeah, So it's it's like I got a
window from twelve to three to make that happen. The
kids get home at three. Once the kids are home,
and then I have a son that like walks in anytime.
There'll be nine thirty, we're thinking he's asleep, and he'll
(22:42):
just open the door. Like last night it was ten thirty,
ten o'clock, he'll just open the door. So I'm just
like the only time if we want to enjoy, it
has to be from this time to this time, and
usually twice a week is good enough for both of us.
Sometimes if if we're lucky, if we can fit a
third one in, well we'll three. You know. I hear's
couples that say they say they do it every day
(23:04):
at our age, and I'm like, oh, man, uh because
and and my my doctor says my testosteral level is
pretty good. So I'm like, I don't know if you
because even if I wanted to go all day with
all the stuff that's in my mind and I got
to deal with, Like, yeah, I think two to three
is more than enough. Like I'm we're happy with the two,
and but we definitely have to schedule it. And it's
(23:28):
been you know, some people say, well, let's you have
to schedule it. I'm like, well, something's important to you
kind of do because if you don't, you can go
weeks without, you know, And Teddy and I did go.
We were in a bad rut one time we went,
I want to say we probably had it took us
six months to have sex. We had sex one time
(23:49):
in one year, and it was during our dark time
where I was going just through like she had just
had a baby. So, you know, the first you know,
four years that we were together, I mean we didn't
it was the best, right, it was all the time.
And then I think it was around the time the
Cruise was born that we just we were apart and
(24:12):
it was mainly me as far as my mind, and
I just I wasn't attracted and I just but then
I couldn't get it up. So then I was in
my head about it because I'm like, oh, what is
she going to think? Blah blah blah blah blah, and
I just started overthinking the crap out of it. Well,
then I got so scared that I just didn't even
(24:34):
want to try it because it was so awkward, right,
and like how do you tell your wife that you're
not as attracted to her anymore?
Speaker 2 (24:42):
You know?
Speaker 1 (24:43):
And again she had just had the baby, So it
was just all this stuff, and I was going through
a rough time myself, and I mean it got bad
to the point that like how did I get out
of it? I literally started praying to God. I'm like, God,
I need to be attracted to my wife, Like yeah,
just I this needs to happen, because intimate is very
(25:05):
you know, sex is important. Yeah, And it was crazy
because I kept praying about it. And then one day
out of nowhere, just one day, she walks by the
by the TV and she had a I still remember,
like it was yesterday. She had a long shirt and
it was sort of you know, covering her. She was
underwear and just a shirt on, so all I could
(25:25):
see is the legs. Yeah, and then all of a sudden,
thing boner. I was like, oh shit, like let's go,
and then it's and then great things after that. But
I basically got in and all it was is a
mental thing. I let it get in my head and
(25:45):
then I got so scared about it, and again it
wasn't a really good time in our relationship because of it.
So do I think it's important one thousand percent? Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:55):
I've heard many stories like that, and hearing the those
kind of stories like you can't get it up for
your wife, it's it kind of makes you think, right
like and by the.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
Way she was, I still thought she was beautiful. Yeah, Yeah,
and it was. All it takes is a couple bad
fall starts, if you will, ye, and then you start
getting in your head about it.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
Yeah, Well, you know, let me. Let me say this,
because there's two instances where I want nothing physical to
do with her, Like I don't want I don't want
to have sex with her, I don't want to touch her,
I don't want to be intimate with her. And that's
when we fight and she's being a bitch, and you know,
there's this whole makeup sex thing that has never worked
(26:37):
for me. I know that has worked for a lot
of people, or like it's just this ravishing crazy let's
just fuck the hell out of our brains out and
make up that's never worked for me. If I'm mad
at her or she did something that really offend me
or pissed me off or hurt me, you know, and
it's not often, but you know, relationships happen. I want
nothing to do with there. I don't want to be
(26:59):
around her, I don't want to be intimate with her
or anything that also goes with drinking alcohol, like drunk sex.
I do not like drunk sex. And to me, it
just feels dirty, right because especially she's really thrashed, she
might not remember what happened the next day.
Speaker 1 (27:20):
Right.
Speaker 2 (27:23):
However, I've mentioned this on the show before, which is
okay for me to mention again. There was one time
where she got drunk, not so drunk that she was,
you know, stupid and falling all over herself, but drunk
enough that she was relaxed and loose and she says, okay,
(27:43):
let's do it. Do what we're doing it. It's like, no,
let's let's do anal I'm like what. And it was
because she was drunk that she said let's do anal right,
So I didn't like it. She didn't like it, but
that only impressed upon me, like, Okay, when she's drunk,
(28:05):
she's doing she wants to do crazy stupid shit right.
So it's not the right frame of mind, and I
don't like it. You know. It's it's like it's like
pretending you're somebody you're not.
Speaker 1 (28:16):
I like to be real.
Speaker 2 (28:17):
I like real emotion and real feelings. And if you
don't feeling when you're sober and you're feeling when you're drunk,
they're not they're not sustainable. You know, you're not you're
not really in love, like you're pretending to love me
and you only it's it's kind of like a young girl,
you know, being in a relationship with an older guy
(28:40):
because he's got money. I assume it's like that, right.
You know, she's just closing her eyes and she's just
thinking about his bank account, and this guy is just going, oh,
she's the hottest thing ever. And you know, if he's smart,
he knows he's paying for it. See.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
It's funny because I don't even like alcohol, you know,
but I always drank. I've said on the on the
show before for women. Right, it just it got me
a little loose. It got me, you know, just a
little bit more. It got me in trouble. You got
me a little confident, right, But I like, does it
rarely happens now? Because I rarely get drunk, It's rare.
(29:17):
And I'm not saying like drunk where you're just wasted.
I never get wasted when I'm just throwing up or
anything like that. But to me, like, I kind of
like the drunk sex it it. I don't know. I
just I First of all, my stamina goes up quite
a bit. I've become a machined. I like that part
(29:43):
of it, right Whereas wheen I'm a little too sober,
I'm like, you know, a couple of bad moves here,
I could be done pretty quick. I gotta be a
little more exactly. No, not yet, not yet, right, So
I guess that's the part I like about that part.
You know. In fact, I think some of the best
(30:05):
sex that Teddy and I have had we were both
a little tipsy, you.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
Know what about angry? Have you ever fought and had
makeup sex?
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Not as much, not with Teddy?
Speaker 2 (30:17):
You know.
Speaker 1 (30:19):
That that was makeup sex is cool too, Yeah, not
as good as drunk sex, I think. But but again,
my my, I guess to clarify, like, I still know
what I'm doing, right, It's just you're just a little
more loose. You're just a little more you know, not
in your head about it. So that's the part I
(30:39):
think I'll like about it.
Speaker 2 (30:40):
I could see that, I could definitely see the benefit
of that.
Speaker 1 (30:52):
Have you ever role played?
Speaker 2 (30:55):
No, I have not, And I always wonder or what
it would be like, you know, because you've seen I've
watched porn before. I've seen movies where they role play
like that, and I always wonder what that would do
to the psyche, and if it would be like something
you like so much, like a drug that you want
(31:17):
to have it all the time. And then your regular
sex life is boring and you never want to have
that again. I don't know. I have never done it,
and I wouldn't be opposed to trying it, but I
would be concerned that. Okay, you know, she's in a
little made outfit or cheerleader outfit or whatever outfit you know,
(31:38):
and from now on that's what she has to do.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
Are you a talker when you're having sex?
Speaker 2 (31:43):
No? No, no, I do? I do? You know? Reminder,
I whispering earier. I love you, I love our sex life.
And you know, we've tried the dirty talking before, but
it didn't work. It got too dirty, and then it
wasn't dirty enough and we just picked it all up like, okay,
we're not gonna do that. I don't know what to say.
Speaker 1 (32:04):
I love it. Well if you if you have a
little drunk secks, the dirty talk becomes a little easier.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
So yeah, a lot of things happen easier. Hey, before
we wrap this up, I want to play a little
game called rapid Fire round it and it's it's basically
hot or not is the answer. So it's a quick
I'm gonna I'm gonna say a word, then you can
say a word and we'll say yes. I mean hot
(32:32):
or not? Okay, So starting off, for example, red lipstick,
is that hot or not?
Speaker 1 (32:37):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (32:38):
Hot?
Speaker 1 (32:38):
For sure?
Speaker 2 (32:39):
I like I like it? Yeah, it stands out great.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
Do you have a word nightgown?
Speaker 2 (32:48):
Nightgown hot? I love nightgowns.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
Yeah, I'm gonna go with hot as well, awesome, lingerie,
lingerie hot.
Speaker 2 (32:56):
I have to say hot. Yeah, I like to play
with that.
Speaker 1 (33:00):
Not a big deal for me. No, no, I mean
it's not a bad thing, but not a big deal
for me.
Speaker 2 (33:06):
You can do without it, yeah, okay, role play, fantasies, fantasize.
Speaker 1 (33:14):
I'm gonna say fantasize depends on fantasize about somebody else,
of course, not role play. I mean Teddy and I
have tried wigs, but I'm still thinking to her. Yeah,
like now she's a brunette versus a blonde, so it's
still her, but we're just it's a different look of her.
(33:35):
And I think Teddy's pretty hot as a brunette, even
though I'm more into blondes. But having her change it
up to a brunette is good. What about you so
hot or not hot?
Speaker 2 (33:46):
Hot?
Speaker 1 (33:47):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (33:47):
I think hot. I think it could be really hot.
Toys we talked about this already hot hot yeah, yes,
hot hot yeah, I agree. Scheduling set. I think it
could be hot when you have to. But if you
don't have to, I would say not right, But if
(34:11):
you have to, I think it makes sense being sexually
adventurous and spontaneous, like having sex at the park hot.
I agree. I would love to do that, and hiking
and actually we've done that.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
Yeah, there you go. Waxed or unwaxed, unwaxed.
Speaker 2 (34:29):
Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
Waxed, waxed.
Speaker 2 (34:31):
I don't like hair.
Speaker 1 (34:32):
I was gonna say, okay.
Speaker 2 (34:34):
No, no, no, I don't like hair.
Speaker 1 (34:36):
Waxed. Yeah, no, I'm gonna say waxed all day long,
dirty talk yes, hot.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
Hot, yes, daytime or night time sex.
Speaker 1 (34:48):
Daytime, all day long. I got way more energy nighttime
for me, my energy is all depleted. It's tough for me.
But unless it's I'm drunk. But daytime, all day long.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
I agree. I agree, one hundred percent.
Speaker 1 (34:59):
Shower sex hot hot, very hot, very hot.
Speaker 2 (35:05):
Lights on or off?
Speaker 1 (35:07):
On for sure, on.
Speaker 2 (35:09):
I love the lights on, although I mean, does Teddy
ever like close the curtains and did the night shades
and all that when you guys are gonna no.
Speaker 1 (35:18):
I mean if again, we don't really have too much
nighttime sex anymore because of the kids, so it's it's
lights on for sure.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
As she close the curtains.
Speaker 1 (35:28):
We don't because we have all this like wrapped around
green trees that cover everything, so no one could really
see inside. But man, when we lived in Hollywood Hills,
I was like, man, if people want to see, let
them let them see, let them see. This one's not
even on here. But I think, uh well, anyways, let's
(35:48):
go with for play hot, do or not for play hot?
I'm gonna say hot. Yeah, I'm gonna say for sure
hot unless you're you're running out of time, you.
Speaker 2 (35:59):
Know, right, unless you have no time?
Speaker 1 (36:01):
Right mirror or no mirror. Mirror, mirror all day long,
all rday long. Yeah, that's why I like the Encore
in Vegas. That mirror. Yeah, that is I know, we
always like the Encore. I'm like, yeah, man, I get
to do mind. Have you ever watched the movie American Psycho? Yes,
got you gotta have the mirror once in a while.
(36:21):
You got to see yourself.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
Man, you gotta see yourself. It's awesome, awesome work well,
that's the end of our episode eight, and if you
guys want us to talk a little bit or elaborate
more on our rapid fire a round, let us know
on the comments or give us some feedback. If there's
any anything you guys want us to talk about, give
(36:45):
us some feedback. We really are enjoying this and we
appreciate you all listening. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (36:52):
Yeah, I know, we can't thank you so much for
all the support. And as you can see, we're very
transparent about everything and just ask away and we'll answer away.
So thanks guys, See you guys next time. M hmm.
This is the Eds with Eddie Judge and Edwin Aoyavi.
The husbands know best too Cheese Production.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
We are back for episode eight and we're going to
talk about a topic that a lot of ladies would
like to hear or get a male perspective on. This
is sex and intimacy. Yes, I said it, sex and intimacy.
And when do men not want to talk about sex?
Do you know? What do you think? And when?
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Because we get in trouble if we talk about it.
I'm actually so fearful right now. I feel like I'm
going to get in trouble talk Come on.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
Oh, I love talking about sex with my wife. Although
I got to say my wife is a conservative one
in the relationship. So you know, when the kids are
around and I kiss on her and I love on her,
the kids are like ew, she pushes me away. I'm like,
it's natural. This is what couples do. And intimacy is
so important in my opinion when it comes to relationships, right.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
It's very important. I mean, it's it's a big deal.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
Here's here's our first question. Okay, what do sex mean
to you before marriage? Before you were married, when you
met someone new, how quick did you know you wanted
to sleep with them?
Speaker 1 (01:19):
Interesting question. I can tell you this. The the women
that I loved and I really really liked, the last
thing on my mind was having sex with them. Now,
if I was just physically attracted to them, but that
was it.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
Because there's some girls I was physically attracted to, but
I just knew that they weren't the relationship type or
as I called it, girlfriend material or wife material. Yeah,
like those girls I wanted a break in first night,
let's go.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
I was a very visual person. So you know, if
if I was very physically attracted and that's all I
cared about, I I that's all I thought about. But
what I found, the awareness of it was the girls
that I really really wanted to like have a relationship with. Really,
(02:10):
for me, the last thing on my mind when I
went on that first state was having sex with Yeah.
Speaker 2 (02:16):
And I think I have to clarify something because growing
up as a young man and full of hormones, especially
in your teens, you want to hump every chick you meet,
especially a hot chick or you know, a check that
you're very attracted to. So it took me, you know,
(02:36):
going through relationships where I was in love and it
was intimate, and learning what intimacy was for me, you know,
what does it mean to be physically in bed with
a woman and what are we doing here? Is it
just a physical act or is there a love or
a connection there? Right? So I think I had two
(02:59):
deep intimate relationships, maybe three before I met Tarma, and
then I've had a few relationships where it was just
strictly sex, you know, like they make movies of it,
just friends and it's just a sexual thing, no intimacy.
And I learned that the just sex relationships didn't mean
(03:20):
anything and they felt kind of empty, right. I just
didn't feel good about it. But I wasn't ready to
get into an intimate relationship, but I wanted to be physically,
you know, physical with this relationship. So there were a
couple of relationships like that in my life where you know,
it was just a sexual thing. Yeah, we'd go out
(03:42):
to dinner, but it was not love, it was not intimate.
And I think what happened with Tarma is there was
instant attraction, instant love that and by then when I
met her, I had already figured out that I don't
want to be in a just plain sexual relationship. I
want to be in a loving, intimate relationship, but deep connection.
(04:06):
That was really important to me. Right. That was like, like,
when you're going to get into a relationship, you got
to make sure that there's chemistry. You're not just physically
attracted to this person. You are like deep down in
love and in your heart connected with this person. Because
there's been, you know, instances in my life where I've
had sex and you roll over and you're like, Okay,
(04:27):
get off my bed, get out of my life. I
don't want anything to do with you, right, And it's
so dirty, it's so empty, and I don't like it.
So I never wanted to experience that. And I just
love being connected with Camera. I love the connection I
have with her. And it's like you said, the last
thing I thought about, Well, maybe not the last thing.
(04:48):
Maybe the second thing I thought about with her was
having sex. But the connection I had with her initially
was overwhelmingly attracted to her. And then I found out
she was married, so that kind of shut down everything. Yeah,
and I said, well, you know, I'm not going to
go there. But when we started spending time together and
(05:12):
in the same parties, in the same rooms, and talking
to her and just having conversations with her. That's what
really led me to really get to know her and
see there's more to this woman than just a sexual attraction.
And it wasn't until you know, she was divorced that
I got the opportunity to take her on her first date.
And I don't even think we had sex on our
(05:33):
first date, our official date. It was just like, let's
go out, get to get get to know each other.
We go to La Jolla and nobody knows what's there
and hopefully nobody knows her. And you know, we came
home and I dropped her off, and it was it
was a very respectful in my book, what I call
respectful when you go on a date and you and
you take the girl out and you take her home
(05:54):
and maybe you give her a kiss, but you know,
for the most part, you just show her that I'm
in this for just the sexual part of it. I'm
in this because I am connected with you and I
want to get to know you and everything about you.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
Yeah, you know, to clarify right when you for me,
when you when I really like someone, the last thing
on my mind was having sex with them. But if
they wanted to have sex the first date. I was
all game. Yeah, I mean that's how I met my wife. Yeah, right,
So we ended up, you know, hooking up the first day. Now,
(06:33):
funny enough, I remember that night we hooked up. You know,
we're both sort of kind of drunk wasted that night
and I was giving her a kiss, saying goodbye to her,
and I was putting her in the taxi, and then
she grabbed me and pulled me into the taxi. So
I was like, all right, I guess we're going home.
But I wasn't even planning on it. I was just like,
all right, we'll see you tomorrow. And anyways, I'm glad
(06:54):
she pulled me in because you just never know. Things
happen in life, and who knows what the next day
would have looked like. We probably would have forgot about
me and we wouldn't be here today. So you just
never know. You know what's interesting too, So funny story
since we're talking about sex and partners and all that.
So I don't know if you went through this, But
like whenever I was intimate with someone or I had
(07:17):
sex with someone for whatever reason, whenever I would ask
them how many men they slept with. They always told
me three, so I was always number three. So then
I'm just like, at some point I'm like, are these
girls lying to me? Or my ego was like maybe
I am the third because I was. I'm just so
(07:39):
good they couldn't help themselves. And I guess they slept
with me the first night and I'm their third guy, right, So.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
They read that off of US magazine or one of
those stupid magazines that tells you how to you know,
make a guy happy and lie to him.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
I'm telling you, say we shit. Every girl would tell
me three, right, so you know when I sleep when
Teddy and I hooked up, of course I go and
ask the question. And I'm thinking I'm going to be numbers,
I think, I think. So I'm like, how many men
have you slept with?
Speaker 2 (08:09):
Right? And yeah, I'm.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
Thinking she's going to tell me three, because that's what
every girl has always told me.
Speaker 2 (08:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
Man, when she told me that number, I was like, what,
I like, want to go to the doctor right away?
And I was like, what, by the way, she told
me I could share the number? She did? Yeah, I
asked her, I can, oh, okay, do you want to
guess what her number was no, because I'll get in trouble.
(08:38):
I just tell me it was seventeen.
Speaker 3 (08:41):
Seventeen, Okay, I was like what I was like, But
you know now, I'm like, it's a lot more than seven.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
I know there's a woman out there that it's a
lot more than seventeen. But all I heard was three.
So when I heard seventeen, I was shocked.
Speaker 2 (08:55):
That's funny.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
I think they're funny. Yeah, maybe the most had heard
a girl tell me before it was four. But the
flip side of that, I'm like, all right, she's honest.
Girls wouldn't have told me that, so it actually earned
her a point being honest.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
Well, that's a good positive way of looking at it.
I mean, you know, it's all how you look at it.
I asked those questions when I was younger, and I
paid close attention on how it made me feel, and
the women that were honest, you know, I was like,
oh shit, you've had ten guys, I'm eleven. You know,
it didn't feel good. It didn't feel good at all.
(09:32):
So I learned quickly. You know what when that conversation
comes up, because inevitably it always came up, right, It's
kind of like what do you do for a living?
You just got to ask how many guys have you had?
I learned not to ask those questions, and when they
did come up, I just said, you know, I don't
want to know. I really rather not know and think
(09:55):
that I am the first guy that you've ever been with,
even though you got four kids behind you know, I
want to be the first guy that you've that you've
been with, and and just you know, be in my
denial world and be in love with you, and and
and that's all that matters to me. I don't care
how many guys you've been with it because honestly, it
doesn't matter. You know, it's what's happening today.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Exactly. Do you use any kind of is it just
eddie all the time? Or do you do you bring
in like toys and stuff to the relationship.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
No, we've we've bought toys into the relationship. We recently
purchased a sex chair where we call it a sex
chair officially it's a yoga chair, and you know, we've
used it once or twice since we've bought it, and
it's just it's really comfortable. It makes for a really
incredible sexual experience. And I I would love to use
(10:52):
it more. But what I've what I've recycled it for is,
like I said, it's a yoga chair, so I like
to use it to stretch my back. It's our sex
chair turned into a back chair recently. And she's like,
what are you doing. I'm like, I'm stretching my back.
Speaker 1 (11:08):
It feels good. Yeah, you know, it's interesting about the
whole toy thing. So, you know, Teddy and I have
been together, you know now, I think going on fifteen years,
we're about to celebrate thirteen years, and we've never used
any kind of toys, right, So about six months ago,
I think it was, she's like, hey, do you want
(11:29):
to start using these like ring you know, I think
they're called cock rings or whatever they're called. Yes, And
I kind of got offended. I was like, what am
I not good enough anymore? Like you're bringing in some
toys here, Like, do.
Speaker 2 (11:42):
You not say you might never use the cock ring?
Speaker 1 (11:47):
Never? I'd never used the cock ring before.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
Oh dude, it's crazy. That's a big old bulge hard
on for hours. It's like you don't even have to
try to keep it hard. It's crazy.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
Right, So it's like my first time using it. But
it's it's funny how the ego works sometimes. I was like, yeah, what,
like I could do just fine. I could satisfy you
just fine by myself. What are you talking about that
I need to throw something on. But we've actually been
having a pretty good time with it actually, so yeah,
it took us. Funny, it took us a long time
(12:18):
to use some toys. So she.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Teddy, I think sent my wife those cock rings for
us to try. And it's funny because I don't know
if they're going to air it, but we were we
were filming at the house, just sitting on the on
the bed talking and all of a sudden, my wife
pulls out the cock ring and it's it's it lights
up and it's got a little vibrate right, and and
(12:42):
I'm like, this is not going to be tight enough
for me. You need a smaller one. We started playing
around with it and just joking and it was it
was I hope they air it because it was such
a funny scene, funny awkward scene, but yeah, the ego
jumped in. I'm like, I'm not putting this thing on.
I don't need it. And then plus, what's a little
(13:04):
vibration gonna do.
Speaker 1 (13:06):
All right, So so check this out. So so, I
we probably have a lot of single women that that
listened to this show, right, and some of them might
want to date younger guys. I mean, you've been seeing
it more and more and more. Right, So, when you
were younger and you met maybe somebody that was older
(13:27):
that had way more experience than you did, did that
intimidate you?
Speaker 2 (13:31):
No, that attracted me more. The funny thing about my life,
in my relationships with my girls, is that I've always
been attracted to older women. And I used to wonder why,
but I always thought it's because there's so much to
learn in life, and particularly was about, yeah, how to
(13:54):
how to make a woman happy in bed, you know,
sexually intimately, And I learned it. I mean I think
I was eighteen and a girlfriend at the time was
like twenty five years old, and she taught me a lot.
You know, most of the older women's made the first
move and they taught me, you know, how to pleasure them.
(14:16):
So I think it's a good thing.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
That's awesome. By the way, what how many dates did
it take you to have sex with town? I know
you guys had to wait because she was married. But
how many dates do you think you went on before
you were into.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
I think it was after the first date. Yeah, it
wasn't too long after. Like I said, there was a
physical attraction as well. But if I'm to go back
to the initial reason I fell in love with her,
I literally open up the front door of my house
because they came to film at my house and we
got eye to eye contact and it was love and
birds and hearts and.
Speaker 1 (14:53):
It was bizarre.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
It was love at first sight. And then after I
got past her eyes, I saw her body and her
phys and then her personality and everything just was like,
oh my god, this woman is amazing. And then we
find out she's married. Dab it. So that was that
was literally the first experience with my wife. And it wasn't,
(15:16):
like I said, it wasn't until seven or eight months
later that we actually got a chance to explore that
that initial feeling, that that solidified. Okay, this is this
is the one. This is who I'm going to spend
the rest of the time my life with.
Speaker 1 (15:30):
Yeah, so after thirteen years, don't tell us what we
want to hear, tell us the truth here. How many
times a week do you guys have sex.
Speaker 2 (15:45):
We probably average once a week, you know, we we
we obviously, And I remember when we first started filming.
We used to have six hour sessions. It was incredible.
But I was younger, had a lot more stam you.
Speaker 1 (16:00):
Know, a lot less stress back then too, Probably less stress.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
Yeah, but I also felt probably that I had to perform,
you know, because it was so important to me to
have such a solid intimate relationship. I think mostly because
I knew that eventually it's got to be more than sex.
It's got to be more than this. So there's got
(16:27):
to be something other than just the physical act of
having sex that's gonna give us longevity in our marriage.
And I want to say it might have been two
or three years ago when that transition started happening, where
sex wasn't the biggest priority anymore, maybe even four years ago,
(16:48):
where it was like, Okay, you're working hard, I'm working hard,
where you know, we have very little time. And I
don't know if she felt this way, but I felt like,
you know what, I'm I'm solid. I am confident that
I'm going to be with this one for the rest
of my life because every single time, and I'm talking
every single time we make love, it's like the very
first time we made love. I just and I tell
(17:10):
it like it's incredible, and I know that when the
act happens, we're going to have that same for the
first time experience for the rest of our life. Right,
So it doesn't have to happen every day, and it
doesn't have to be a chore, right, it just it
just has to happen when she feels it and I
(17:30):
feel it, and we make it happen. But we don't
force it. We don't make it happen. And lately it's
it's I mean, I've gone even two weeks without having
sex with her.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
But I was going to say, what's been the longest
have you ever gotten in a rut? Or what's been
the longest that you've gone without.
Speaker 2 (17:50):
I probably would say I've gone without maybe two to
three months. And that was during my heart issue. That
was when I was having heart issues and I my
life was upside down. I couldn't exercise, I couldn't do
anything that brought any joy to me physically, mentally, emotionally.
It kind of took a back seat, right it was.
Speaker 1 (18:12):
It was tragic.
Speaker 2 (18:15):
But then again, like I said, I still had the
confidence that she's going to be there for me regardless
of whether we have sex or not, because she's here,
she's helping me, she's going to the doctor visits with me,
she's here, you know, living through this with me. So
it kinda just it was one of those things like
it's not a big priority, it's not the top of
(18:35):
mind that I want to think about right now. And
that was a long time because I think that was
probably also around the same time I experienced about of depression,
which I've never experienced before. I'm a positive guy and
I like to spend every negative situation into a positive situation.
That's always helped me be who I am. And that
(18:55):
was the very first time where everything was just coming
down on me and I was didn't want want to
do anything, didn't want to I couldn't go to work,
I had to hire a manager to run the gym.
I couldn't work out, I couldn't ride my bike, and
riding my bike was second to having sex with my wife,
you know, it's like the best, my favorite thing to do.
And I realized this is this is not me, man.
(19:17):
I don't like being like this. I don't look I
don't like who I am. So that's probably the longest
I've ever been without with her, you know, being intimate
with her. But but yeah, it's to me, it's it's
it's there. I know it's always going to be incredible.
We've I don't think, no, we've never had a bad
(19:38):
sex session. Honestly, it's always just been great. And and
there's no insecurities about that, right And and I think
that's probably why I you know, we we we tried
some toys. We tried some we tried the sex table
or the bed I bought her, you know, I went,
I went to a sex shop by my self to
(20:00):
go check it out. And that was a pretty interesting experience, like, okay,
tell me about all these things here, and and the
lady was very you know, ANIMI animated and excited to
tell me and educate me on all how all these
things work. And uh, and that's when I learned about
butt plugs. People use butt plugs.
Speaker 1 (20:20):
For I don't know, arouse them.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
And it looks like like a spaceship that's about this
big and it goes up your butt and and that's it.
I guess that's that's what it does. Like I don't
see any pleasure in that. So I know that people
have been telling me before that, uh, there's an orogen
and sown and men.
Speaker 1 (20:44):
Like I was gonna say, is that for female or
for male?
Speaker 2 (20:47):
It's it's for both. But apparently men have it too,
where you could reach climax by you know, tickling this
certain part, like to call it the clitoris of the male.
I mean, I mean that's I guess why gay guys
yeah like it, right, I mean they don't. They don't
deal with coltaoruses.
Speaker 1 (21:06):
I have a friend who's single who swears by it.
He's been trying to get me to do it. I just, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah,
it's the best thing ever.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
I have no interest in it.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:16):
I always say there's there's a tattoo, the only tattoo
I have, and it'sprked by my asshole that says exit
only that's all it says. But yeah, I mean toys
are they could be fun.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
I learned that you can use these what otherwise look
like dusters that you know, the house cleaners used to
dust your your house. You can use that to arouse
the body, you know, just light touch. So there's a
lot of different ways to explore our sexual life that
I'm open to except butt plus and nothing's going on
(21:51):
my butt.
Speaker 1 (21:52):
Yeah, Sam, I agreed on that. You know, Teddy and I,
I was going to say Teddy and I we were
probably two a week. We go twice and when it's
scheduled too, which I'd love because she's busy, I'm busy,
and we're both attracted to each other, so it's not
like we have to feel in the mood. And you know,
when you have children, you kind of have to schedule
(22:14):
it right, And I get in my head, like I
hate being intimate with my wife if the kids are home.
Speaker 2 (22:19):
Yeah, me too, Like I.
Speaker 1 (22:21):
Gotta like try to stay quiet and my back. In
the back of my mind, I'm like, what if they
walk in? Yeah, So it's it's like I got a
window from twelve to three to make that happen. The
kids get home at three. Once the kids are home,
and then I have a son that like walks in anytime.
There'll be nine thirty, we're thinking he's asleep, and he'll
(22:42):
just open the door. Like last night it was ten thirty,
ten o'clock, he'll just open the door. So I'm just
like the only time if we want to enjoy, it
has to be from this time to this time, and
usually twice a week is good enough for both of us.
Sometimes if if we're lucky, if we can fit a
third one in, well we'll three. You know. I hear's
couples that say they say they do it every day
(23:04):
at our age, and I'm like, oh, man, uh because
and and my my doctor says my testosteral level is
pretty good. So I'm like, I don't know if you
because even if I wanted to go all day with
all the stuff that's in my mind and I got
to deal with, Like, yeah, I think two to three
is more than enough. Like I'm we're happy with the two,
and but we definitely have to schedule it. And it's
(23:28):
been you know, some people say, well, let's you have
to schedule it. I'm like, well, something's important to you
kind of do because if you don't, you can go
weeks without, you know, And Teddy and I did go.
We were in a bad rut one time we went,
I want to say we probably had it took us
six months to have sex. We had sex one time
(23:49):
in one year, and it was during our dark time
where I was going just through like she had just
had a baby. So, you know, the first you know,
four years that we were together, I mean we didn't
it was the best, right, it was all the time.
And then I think it was around the time the
Cruise was born that we just we were apart and
(24:12):
it was mainly me as far as my mind, and
I just I wasn't attracted and I just but then
I couldn't get it up. So then I was in
my head about it because I'm like, oh, what is
she going to think? Blah blah blah blah blah, and
I just started overthinking the crap out of it. Well,
then I got so scared that I just didn't even
(24:34):
want to try it because it was so awkward, right,
and like how do you tell your wife that you're
not as attracted to her anymore?
Speaker 2 (24:42):
You know?
Speaker 1 (24:43):
And again she had just had the baby, So it
was just all this stuff, and I was going through
a rough time myself, and I mean it got bad
to the point that like how did I get out
of it? I literally started praying to God. I'm like, God,
I need to be attracted to my wife, Like yeah,
just I this needs to happen, because intimate is very
(25:05):
you know, sex is important. Yeah, And it was crazy
because I kept praying about it. And then one day
out of nowhere, just one day, she walks by the
by the TV and she had a I still remember,
like it was yesterday. She had a long shirt and
it was sort of you know, covering her. She was
underwear and just a shirt on, so all I could
(25:25):
see is the legs. Yeah, and then all of a sudden,
thing boner. I was like, oh shit, like let's go,
and then it's and then great things after that. But
I basically got in and all it was is a
mental thing. I let it get in my head and
(25:45):
then I got so scared about it, and again it
wasn't a really good time in our relationship because of it.
So do I think it's important one thousand percent? Yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:55):
I've heard many stories like that, and hearing the those
kind of stories like you can't get it up for
your wife, it's it kind of makes you think, right
like and by the.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
Way she was, I still thought she was beautiful. Yeah, Yeah,
and it was. All it takes is a couple bad
fall starts, if you will, ye, and then you start
getting in your head about it.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
Yeah, Well, you know, let me. Let me say this,
because there's two instances where I want nothing physical to
do with her, Like I don't want I don't want
to have sex with her, I don't want to touch her,
I don't want to be intimate with her. And that's
when we fight and she's being a bitch, and you know,
there's this whole makeup sex thing that has never worked
(26:37):
for me. I know that has worked for a lot
of people, or like it's just this ravishing crazy let's
just fuck the hell out of our brains out and
make up that's never worked for me. If I'm mad
at her or she did something that really offend me
or pissed me off or hurt me, you know, and
it's not often, but you know, relationships happen. I want
nothing to do with there. I don't want to be
(26:59):
around her, I don't want to be intimate with her
or anything that also goes with drinking alcohol, like drunk sex.
I do not like drunk sex. And to me, it
just feels dirty, right because especially she's really thrashed, she
might not remember what happened the next day.
Speaker 1 (27:20):
Right.
Speaker 2 (27:23):
However, I've mentioned this on the show before, which is
okay for me to mention again. There was one time
where she got drunk, not so drunk that she was,
you know, stupid and falling all over herself, but drunk
enough that she was relaxed and loose and she says, okay,
(27:43):
let's do it. Do what we're doing it. It's like, no,
let's let's do anal I'm like what. And it was
because she was drunk that she said let's do anal right,
So I didn't like it. She didn't like it, but
that only impressed upon me, like, Okay, when she's drunk,
(28:05):
she's doing she wants to do crazy stupid shit right.
So it's not the right frame of mind, and I
don't like it. You know. It's it's like it's like
pretending you're somebody you're not.
Speaker 1 (28:16):
I like to be real.
Speaker 2 (28:17):
I like real emotion and real feelings. And if you
don't feeling when you're sober and you're feeling when you're drunk,
they're not they're not sustainable. You know, you're not you're
not really in love, like you're pretending to love me
and you only it's it's kind of like a young girl,
you know, being in a relationship with an older guy
(28:40):
because he's got money. I assume it's like that, right.
You know, she's just closing her eyes and she's just
thinking about his bank account, and this guy is just going, oh,
she's the hottest thing ever. And you know, if he's smart,
he knows he's paying for it. See.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
It's funny because I don't even like alcohol, you know,
but I always drank. I've said on the on the
show before for women. Right, it just it got me
a little loose. It got me, you know, just a
little bit more. It got me in trouble. You got
me a little confident, right, But I like, does it
rarely happens now? Because I rarely get drunk, It's rare.
(29:17):
And I'm not saying like drunk where you're just wasted.
I never get wasted when I'm just throwing up or
anything like that. But to me, like, I kind of
like the drunk sex it it. I don't know. I
just I First of all, my stamina goes up quite
a bit. I've become a machined. I like that part
(29:43):
of it, right Whereas wheen I'm a little too sober,
I'm like, you know, a couple of bad moves here,
I could be done pretty quick. I gotta be a
little more exactly. No, not yet, not yet, right, So
I guess that's the part I like about that part.
You know. In fact, I think some of the best
(30:05):
sex that Teddy and I have had we were both
a little tipsy, you.
Speaker 2 (30:08):
Know what about angry? Have you ever fought and had
makeup sex?
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Not as much, not with Teddy?
Speaker 2 (30:17):
You know.
Speaker 1 (30:19):
That that was makeup sex is cool too, Yeah, not
as good as drunk sex, I think. But but again,
my my, I guess to clarify, like, I still know
what I'm doing, right, It's just you're just a little
more loose. You're just a little more you know, not
in your head about it. So that's the part I
(30:39):
think I'll like about it.
Speaker 2 (30:40):
I could see that, I could definitely see the benefit
of that.
Speaker 1 (30:52):
Have you ever role played?
Speaker 2 (30:55):
No, I have not, And I always wonder or what
it would be like, you know, because you've seen I've
watched porn before. I've seen movies where they role play
like that, and I always wonder what that would do
to the psyche, and if it would be like something
you like so much, like a drug that you want
(31:17):
to have it all the time. And then your regular
sex life is boring and you never want to have
that again. I don't know. I have never done it,
and I wouldn't be opposed to trying it, but I
would be concerned that. Okay, you know, she's in a
little made outfit or cheerleader outfit or whatever outfit you know,
(31:38):
and from now on that's what she has to do.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
Are you a talker when you're having sex?
Speaker 2 (31:43):
No? No, no, I do? I do? You know? Reminder,
I whispering earier. I love you, I love our sex life.
And you know, we've tried the dirty talking before, but
it didn't work. It got too dirty, and then it
wasn't dirty enough and we just picked it all up like, okay,
we're not gonna do that. I don't know what to say.
Speaker 1 (32:04):
I love it. Well if you if you have a
little drunk secks, the dirty talk becomes a little easier.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
So yeah, a lot of things happen easier. Hey, before
we wrap this up, I want to play a little
game called rapid Fire round it and it's it's basically
hot or not is the answer. So it's a quick
I'm gonna I'm gonna say a word, then you can
say a word and we'll say yes. I mean hot
(32:32):
or not? Okay, So starting off, for example, red lipstick,
is that hot or not?
Speaker 1 (32:37):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (32:38):
Hot?
Speaker 1 (32:38):
For sure?
Speaker 2 (32:39):
I like I like it? Yeah, it stands out great.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
Do you have a word nightgown?
Speaker 2 (32:48):
Nightgown hot? I love nightgowns.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
Yeah, I'm gonna go with hot as well, awesome, lingerie,
lingerie hot.
Speaker 2 (32:56):
I have to say hot. Yeah, I like to play
with that.
Speaker 1 (33:00):
Not a big deal for me. No, no, I mean
it's not a bad thing, but not a big deal
for me.
Speaker 2 (33:06):
You can do without it, yeah, okay, role play, fantasies, fantasize.
Speaker 1 (33:14):
I'm gonna say fantasize depends on fantasize about somebody else,
of course, not role play. I mean Teddy and I
have tried wigs, but I'm still thinking to her. Yeah,
like now she's a brunette versus a blonde, so it's
still her, but we're just it's a different look of her.
(33:35):
And I think Teddy's pretty hot as a brunette, even
though I'm more into blondes. But having her change it
up to a brunette is good. What about you so
hot or not hot?
Speaker 2 (33:46):
Hot?
Speaker 1 (33:47):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (33:47):
I think hot. I think it could be really hot.
Toys we talked about this already hot hot yeah, yes,
hot hot yeah, I agree. Scheduling set. I think it
could be hot when you have to. But if you
don't have to, I would say not right, But if
(34:11):
you have to, I think it makes sense being sexually
adventurous and spontaneous, like having sex at the park hot.
I agree. I would love to do that, and hiking
and actually we've done that.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
Yeah, there you go. Waxed or unwaxed, unwaxed.
Speaker 2 (34:29):
Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (34:30):
Waxed, waxed.
Speaker 2 (34:31):
I don't like hair.
Speaker 1 (34:32):
I was gonna say, okay.
Speaker 2 (34:34):
No, no, no, I don't like hair.
Speaker 1 (34:36):
Waxed. Yeah, no, I'm gonna say waxed all day long,
dirty talk yes, hot.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
Hot, yes, daytime or night time sex.
Speaker 1 (34:48):
Daytime, all day long. I got way more energy nighttime
for me, my energy is all depleted. It's tough for me.
But unless it's I'm drunk. But daytime, all day long.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
I agree. I agree, one hundred percent.
Speaker 1 (34:59):
Shower sex hot hot, very hot, very hot.
Speaker 2 (35:05):
Lights on or off?
Speaker 1 (35:07):
On for sure, on.
Speaker 2 (35:09):
I love the lights on, although I mean, does Teddy
ever like close the curtains and did the night shades
and all that when you guys are gonna no.
Speaker 1 (35:18):
I mean if again, we don't really have too much
nighttime sex anymore because of the kids, so it's it's
lights on for sure.
Speaker 2 (35:26):
As she close the curtains.
Speaker 1 (35:28):
We don't because we have all this like wrapped around
green trees that cover everything, so no one could really
see inside. But man, when we lived in Hollywood Hills,
I was like, man, if people want to see, let
them let them see, let them see. This one's not
even on here. But I think, uh well, anyways, let's
(35:48):
go with for play hot, do or not for play hot?
I'm gonna say hot. Yeah, I'm gonna say for sure
hot unless you're you're running out of time, you.
Speaker 2 (35:59):
Know, right, unless you have no time?
Speaker 1 (36:01):
Right mirror or no mirror. Mirror, mirror all day long,
all rday long. Yeah, that's why I like the Encore
in Vegas. That mirror. Yeah, that is I know, we
always like the Encore. I'm like, yeah, man, I get
to do mind. Have you ever watched the movie American Psycho? Yes,
got you gotta have the mirror once in a while.
(36:21):
You got to see yourself.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
Man, you gotta see yourself. It's awesome, awesome work well,
that's the end of our episode eight, and if you
guys want us to talk a little bit or elaborate
more on our rapid fire a round, let us know
on the comments or give us some feedback. If there's
any anything you guys want us to talk about, give
(36:45):
us some feedback. We really are enjoying this and we
appreciate you all listening. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (36:52):
Yeah, I know, we can't thank you so much for
all the support. And as you can see, we're very
transparent about everything and just ask away and we'll answer away.
So thanks guys, See you guys next time. M hmm.
Hosts And Creators
Edwin Arroyave
Eddie Judge
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