Sandwich Wars (with Rudy Ortiz)

Frankie sits with comedian and friend Rudy Ortiz to share stories from Frankie’s tour. Also, did you know some people call hotdogs sandwiches? Tune in to hear some mind blowing revelations. Plus sketches, songs and more!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
We got that laughter for your soul. And now to
get into the Frankie on this show. The Frankie on
this show brought to you, but it depends m brought
to you by Sandwiches as real though today it's it's Yeah,
we got a lot of talk about. Yeah, there's a
lot to talk about. Clarifications. Yeah, man, now, but you

(00:26):
do love your talking out. It's one of the things
I love about you. It's what these I love about you. Really,
I couldn't tell me and me and the homie christ
is stratter. For those who don't know, uh those have
you been been coming to my live shows throughout the years,
you know that Rudio has been my host the whole time.
Rocket with me boys, yes, uh the host with the
most man, I'm out there trying to make it happen.
But bring the crowd up, do your thing. I love it. Uh. Well,

(00:48):
the show just adapted over the years, and I just
tried to adapt to the show over the years. You know,
like with the energy you're bringing to the to the stage,
I'm just trying to bring trying to like match that,
just match that energy. Yeah yeah, no, get there, keep
him there. But yeah, yeah, yeah, because you were there
the whole right, like when the when the videos started
going viral and I had to start doing you know,
I didn't have to start. I wanted to do the

(01:10):
character's life. There's a lot of people are saying, oh,
they should do who Creeper was, and they didn't really know.
They didn't even know I did stand upright. You know.
It's still to this day people are like, oh, it
does stand up, you know, especially now with this for
on Hulu and all that. They're like and they just
know me as that. Now they come to their shows like, oh,
he does stand up. And then we've had we've had
we have this chemistry and followship thing like yeah, we've
been doing this for this is my sixteenth year doing
stand up, you know, and it's like, well now it'll

(01:31):
be seventeen years this fall. Dude. I remember Il Parada
back in the day and shout out Keego, Breeze, shout
out to Keiko. That's like, that's like an old school.
I've always been honored because some people actually called Il
Parada like the West Coast Apollo. And I know it's
not a big theater or anything like that, but it
has that energy, the energy where it's like if you're
not doing well, that lets you know. And I appreciate that.

(01:52):
It's one of the very few spots left the way
the way San Francisco has changed, you know. And it
was like, man, I remember the first place I ever
headline was at Il Parada. So those who don't know,
it's it's in Portral Patrol Hill neighborhood of San Francisco,
you know, so there's the Mission Portraro, that whole area. Uh,
it's it's a very blue collar bar, you know. It's

(02:13):
it's it's the people. It's for locals. It's the locals.
People go after work, you know, watch the game and
Kiko breeze, you know, Tony Sparks is a whole sir
a long time and I remember it was it was
my birthday actually, and I think it was. Man, it
must have been two thousand seven, two eight, maybe just
maybe just a year or two, maybe a year and

(02:34):
a half. For two years after I started doing stand
up and the headliner couldn't make it, and then Keiko
and Tony were like, oh, man, it's your birthday. My
parents were there, all that stuff they had come up
because we were just you know, whatever, they would come
up a lot anyway, just to see family and all
that stuff. Remember that night, it was like, uh, you know,

(02:55):
they were like, hey, man, the headline can make I
was just supposed to do a spot that you want
a headline, man, And that night at El Parada, Man,
it was it just worked out. Sometimes it stars aligning.
It's kind of like my like, oh man, you're meant
to do this, you know, And it was like you know,
and then obviously you know, you know, I was even
after that night, I was like, oh man, I'm about
to brow up, like this is happening. You're on You're

(03:16):
on the right home, Like it's happening. I'm manifesting it.
Let's go see, you know, ten years later, up thirty
five years old, sleeping on my homies couch like it's happening.
You're like flossing in the mirror, like it's happening. It's
gonna happen. I know it is. But that it was
good man. It was because yeah, that vibe. But now
here we are you doing your own podcast and just
all the success that you've built off of. And by

(03:36):
the way, man, I know, it's hard to do a podcast, Uh,
mainly because you have to have like different shirts. You
have to have multiple shirts because you can't wear the
same shirt twice. Man, I know people do notice those
type of things. Yeah, I appreciate your efforts. Yeah, thank you.
Only I switched up the shirt, but thanks for la.
People know that I record more than one interview. Well
that's not what I was saying. I'm just like like,
like even if you, if you, even if you weren't

(03:57):
doing more than one on one day, you still have
that more shirts because you can't wear the same shirt
on the podcast twice. Yes, people will point these things outright,
having different Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's the thing on when
I get a good shirt that just fits good. Come,
I know you'd like to wear your shirts a little
one size too small. It's called it's called fitted. Understand. Understand,
there's a reason why. It's for It's for us to

(04:17):
the people that want. I love that you own up
to it because sometimes depending what city were in, Like
when we're in Minneapolis in the winter and you're going
up their nipples out my boy fitted shirt with no
undershirt and just the nipples back. But it's confidence because
you're like, yeah, I know my nipples are you announce
it to the people. And the thing is that the
thing is that I feel like I may even have
a condition because my nipples do not get they do

(04:39):
not get soft like that, no matter what, no matter
what time of day it is, no matter what season,
You're always gonna get erect like erect nipples. And I'm
not even aroused. I'm just this is just my natural state.
Very right. Well, congratulations that I'm just saying because when
people do see me, they do point out the nipples
because I wear a lot of those softball teas and

(05:01):
and then and the nipples really pop out, you know
what I'm saying. So I just I don't want anybody
get the wrong idea. That's all. No, No, I mean,
I thank you for the disclaimer and putting it out there.
But I love that you continue that life, you know,
and you're like, oh man, I'm cool with it. This
is what I do. I know, it's a thing. I know.
My nipples they pop bam, and it's one of the
many things I appreciate appreciate about you. With that being said,
this is the Frankie you know on the show podcast

(05:22):
I'm Frankie. I'm hearing one of my right here, a
long time road dog, the host with the most rudy
or tease. Sir, thank you for having me, Bro, it's
been a it's been a long time coming. I was like,
been watching you build this whole podcast, and I'm like
seeing all the people that you got coming on and stuff,
and I'm like, man, hopefully one day I can go
rock with my boys. So thank you for having me.
Then oh yeah, yeah, man. Well you know I was
one of those fools like because everybody telling me all

(05:42):
you need to do a pocket and I was one
of those like, man, everybody has a podcast. But then um,
you see how strong it was, and and and then
like other like mentors or community be like, no, man,
there's people like they run out of podcast and listen
to because some people that's all they do when they're
in their cars. The first thing to do on podcast
podcast podcast. And then so I was like, okay, well
if I do something, I want to do different. So

(06:03):
the idea was already in my head, like I want
to do sketches. Um, the whole first season we just
did all sketches, which was a lot of work, remember that.
And it wasn't until the second season I was like
or towards the end of the first season into the
second season, I was like, you know, I want to
incorporate interviews to know I needed, you know, something I
need to get better at and doing my thing, and
I just wanted homies to talk to and stuff like that.

(06:24):
And then you know, obviously we had the amazing opportunity
with Will Ferrell's you know, big much shots, big money players.
We are at the iHeart Studios, and Will Ferrell showly
love to to my character work and what I do
and all that, and and I was like, dang man,
like what it was already in my head and all
of a sudden you got the o G like that.
It's like, hey, you know, we want to bring bring
you to our platform. I honestly, bro like, I was

(06:44):
excited to see you actually have one, because you're not
the only comic that criticizes the fact that every comic
had a podcast or has a podcast, right, But I
love the fact that podcasts that become like such a
big part of the culture now, not just comedy culture,
but just like American culture because because honestly, like I
enjoy I think that people enjoy having conversation and people
enjoy listening to conversation. But for some odd reason, like

(07:06):
we don't really you know, we don't really like display,
we don't show how much we enjoy talking to each other,
but we do. And people will listen to two strangers
have a conversation and you give them the opportunity. Oh yeah, No,
I don't know why, but that's how we're built. No,
And it's interesting. And I know you love to talk
at me and the homie Chris and try to So
for those who don't know, Chris trying to play Hulio
is the co star creator of this fool uh So

(07:30):
for those who don't know, it's it was me, Rudy
and Chris and the Bayonet like touring for years and
so we've spent a lot of time together, a lot,
you know. And one of the things that we enjoyed
about you is Rudy loves to conversate, you know, converse,
you know whatever, with strangers, with people I know, so
and he's kind of like he throws lines out like
a fisherman, like you know, we'll be at a bar

(07:51):
and you know, especially if they're sports on or something,
and if he can't get somebody engaged, they don't even
know what they're getting into. There's an open seat next
to Rudy and he's like he tapped a little chair
like here, and then if the conversation goes in and
he gets him. He even tapped his leg, got one,
Here we go. That's the universal sign right there, trapped

(08:12):
got him, Here we go. But I love that you
little to talk about You're you're a great speaker to it,
like you know, you do your say like that hold
tip like you know it's drawn in, Like Okay, this
guy knows that he's doing here. Brother, way I look
at him and like, look, we we we spend so
much time. We've spent so much time on the road together. Man,
It's like one of the best one of the dopest
parts is like after the shows, you know, you're obviously

(08:33):
you're you're in you know full Frankie kenyonis mode, right.
So I'm helping, whether it's merch or whether it's with pictures,
whatever it may be. And bro, I get a kick
out of like just getting to know the people that
actually come and check out the show. So I just
figured like when we're out on the road and we
go eat or whatever, we go to a bar, I mean,
just keep the keep the flow going, because I mnna
have to talk to a thousand people after the show,

(08:54):
after the show's over anyways, so I might as well
just get the get the wheels turning now, you know,
early in the daytime. Yeah, let's get it. Oh my gosh.
So so sometimes we'll be in hotel rooms and I
remember those one morning, Homie, and it was it was
we had rooms where those balconies. Those were like and

(09:15):
I'm in the room next door this motherfucker. You're like
on the balcony at like eight am, just talking sports
like gee king or something like all out like that,
Like you were doing a podcast and I'm waking up
like these motherfucker's like, and I opened the door, shut
the funk up. So anyway, talking about Clay Thompson's about
got another good year, you were like a disgruntled landlord.

(09:37):
I was like, why is this do something? I don't
owe him rent? What's the bro But again speaking to
the power of conversation though, and the way that it
has a gravitational pool, because it does. Did that lady
not come out on her own balcony a couple of
minutes later and start giving comments on Clay Thompson as well,
and then Frankie, and we all looked at Frankie and
you were just disgruntled. You're like, you're fucking getting involved
in this ship. You're you're you're going along with the

(09:58):
I'm like you like the you don't know what you're
getting hit too, girl. I like you in let me
go up there with for this conversation and I'll bring coffee.
Don't worry about it. I got you. It's the power
of conversation, bro that people people funk with that, and
that will never that will never fade away. That is
part of the human condition. So as much as people
will say, like, oh man, I don't like it. Sometimes
really talks too much. I mean it is true sometimes

(10:20):
I do talk too much, but I mean we all
to talk. I talk too much sometimes, you know. I'm
not as confident as you though, when it comes to conversations.
I'll be like cool, like I got a short memory, Doug,
Like if I said something stupid or I bothered you,
I forgot about it already and I'm just moving on
to the next ridiculous thing. I'm gonna say. Yeah, as
long as nobody has like a phone out, to fact

(10:40):
check me in the moment. I can go all day.
I can just make you're definitely that. Like when we're
talking Hirod mentioned that earlier, You're like, well, let's google that. No, no,
we don't need that right now. Come on, you got
press in a moment. Are you with this or not?
Because I got other people to bother, I can bother
somebody else if you don't want to tap on the
shoulder and I'm gonna be go. My job is very

(11:04):
stressful and I can't wait to get home where it
gets cozy. I like to make myself, set me eat,
pour myself a glass of wine, then walk around the
house of my favorite piannies. Tia Donna's piannies are lazy, cute,
and so very comfortable. It feels like I'm almost wearing nothing.
Package for holy fuck, thanks for the package. Tia Dona's

(11:25):
piannies come in a variety of colors that fit all
different body tights, from petite flat butt sizes for the
slimmer ladies to the wide load panties with extra room
for that sexy front. But those are my favorite. That's
a lot of cute, So try Tiadonna's piannies. Available everywhere
because you deserve the bs m m mmmmmmmmmm. We got

(11:51):
that laughter for your soul and now tuned into the
Frankie on this show. And for those who don't know, Man, uh,
you have been a radio personality for it's it's been
eight years now, Man. And I started off in a
sports talk shoutout to uh the Game uh KGMZ down
in San Francisco. Did a morning show there on the
weekends called the Three Amigos, and then after that I

(12:11):
actually worked for the Giants and the forty Niners Slagship
station which just cambr and I did a morning show there,
all sports talk and I loved it. And you know,
I don't have a radio radio background, so like I
didn't go to school for like communications or anything like that.
I just got picked up at a comedy show because
I was doing a bit about the forty Niners. And
then one of the people that was in the in
the in the crowd happened to be the person that

(12:33):
was dating the boss at one of these stations, and
so she put me in touch with him, and that's
how I got into I just stumbled into Radio Dog.
So that's how that's how I went down I was
doing like I was doing a bit on like Colin
Kaepernick or something like that, and this lady heard me
and it was like it was that Tommy Tease the
comedy club Tommy Teas, like a Tuesday night. Nobody was
there and it was just one crowd of women doing

(12:55):
a bachelorette party, and so she heard my she heard
my bid and I was talking to them, obviously because
nobody else was in the building. So she put me
in touch with her. Nobody nobody else is in there, bro,
but she put me in touch with her, dude, And
that's that's how I got into radio. So I feel
bad when I see other people, like these youngsters that
are like eighty dollars in debt because they went to
college and everything. Feel bad. But I'm just saying though.
Sometimes they'll tell me. They'll be like, oh, so, how'd

(13:16):
you get into radio, And I'll be like, I'm just
telling jokes at a club and then boom, I landed
here yea, And in the meantime, like you know, they
gotta they're working in a different way. But yeah, man,
you never know, but you gotta keep your options up man. Yeah,
I mean that's you know, I went to school. I
did it. That's what my degree is in broadcasting the
media communications to be I was like, I want to
be in the morning radio DJ. Wow. I was like

(13:37):
my my goal in the beginning. And I was like, Hey,
what's up y'all in the morning, positive vibes, wake up?
Wake up because you got radio energy though. No, And
when I was a youngster, I would, you know, with
audio cassette tapes, you know, he could double record. I
would record tracks and then like basically record my own
radio show, like episodes, and I'd be like, what's up

(13:59):
have y'all? Dat at that? All right? I want to
give this this next one to Rick James, you know,
Dada da give it up for this jam. And I
would play the songs and I'll have these audio cassettes
from being this this jockey. And so I was like,
and this was when I was like, you know, tan
and leven, twelve years old. My mom dad raised me
on good music. You know, that's what it is. And
back in those days, like we didn't know, like the
the idea of being a stand up comic probably wasn't,

(14:19):
you know, the first thing that came to mind. But
little did you know at that time that just trying
to emulate the radio personalities and like trying to do
kind of mimic what they do. That kind of leads
you this thing right here, bro, this microphone is a
very powerful thing, man. So like there's a lot of
different ways that you can take this this microphone. I mean,
you could do radio, you could do stand up comedy.
People that always say that rappers and and comics are

(14:40):
like cousins, you know, because there's a lot of similarities
in both of those worlds. So like, you start doing
stuff that revolves around this microphone, you know, different opportunities
are gonna open up for you. And you have no idea.
Look at you now, I mean you have no idea
we're gonna have a podcast, and you never did radio,
but yet here you are basically kind of living out
the dream that you were doing as a kid when
you were recording yourself on that cassette. Yeah it's the voices, man,

(15:03):
I'm telling you. You know, you have all the radio energy, man,
for real. And then it was like my mom and
pop has always had stand up on the and in
the house, and so it was always like, uh, fascinating
to me because sometimes you know, when I was a youngster,
they they were struggling, you know, like find like they
always took care of us, always had you always had
a roof overhead full of the table and stuff like that.

(15:24):
But man, I remember, you know, and it's like emotional
to talk about, but I was like they always just
for about their kids so much. And I remember like
walking into the living room and walking on them like
crying together, like because they were they didn't know how
we're gonna pay the next bill or pay the the
you know, for the house, and that we would get
our water turned off, the power turned off, because they

(15:45):
were always trying to create a better situation for us.
And it was like but one thing that they always
had on was comedy and music, you know, and so
stand up, I could see like dang, like you know,
one minute they're they're crying, to the next minute they're like,
oh they're laughing at something. Just looking to that humor something.
It's it's the medicine to help you get through. And

(16:07):
so I was like, damn, I was always fascinated with it.
And then I started performing for them in our living
room and just like you know, I would get my
dad's closed, my mom's I didn't get I was making
characters and that's how you know. I was just I
found a sprinkler head and my dad's work truck and
I'll pretend I was a mic and just doing ship.
So it was always like in my head I wanted
to do something, and then it wasn't. When I was
living in San Francisco, you know, and we finished school
and all that, and I was like, man, I want

(16:29):
to go to UH. I want to try this ship
in a way. You know. One of my one of
my homeboys, my pretty more Danny, he was like doing
the audio ship and all that stuff from from what
we learned in school, and he was like, I did
this audio recording for this dude at this cafe slash laundry.
Matt the Brainwashing, the Soma District shout out r I
p Brainwashed, one of the greatest spots in America. It

(16:49):
was the longest running open mic and Santanist going or
something like that. Gets wire dropping in there, Robin Williams.
When they closed they when they closed that place down,
a lot of us were legitimately sad. It wasn't just
like they closed down a club or just the venue.
I was like, dude, Brainwatchers were so many Barrier comics,
a lot of great comics UM got their start. Man,
So it was the first place ever just said. It

(17:10):
was like, you know, and I'm grateful that was a
great place to hold the craft. You got better stage
time than you would have starting out here in Lost,
you know, in l A. And uh, I've been back
in l A for you know, it was ten years
in August, I right back. But but man, I spent
you know that whole time Hony my crab building becoming
the comics that I and before I was like all
right now I'm ready to go back to l A
and then you know, do the thing. But but it

(17:32):
was like that, yeah, that that stage and that vibe
and just like man, it was just like it was
so dope. And then that's where I met. I met
you like shortly after you've been doing it a while
time having at it. This is year fourteen now, yea, yeah,
that's the year fourteen, and I spent the last I've
had the privilege of working with you on the road
for like almost five years now, I want to say,

(17:54):
I want to probably close to five years now fully
like officially, UM that's that's wild man of time flies, bro. Yeah,
real talk. And but you know, we all started doing
comedy just before. We're looking the same we're looking for
the same thing. We're looking for like an outlet, Like
how could I turn what it is that I feel
on the inside that I think is valuable, But I
don't know how to apply it anywhere else, you know,

(18:14):
But how can I use this? You know? And then
you come across the open mic one day, you give
it a try, and the thing that I love about
stand up comedy, brother, Like what I saw from the
get go was that it's it's sink or swim, Like
that's really the feeling. You know. If it doesn't work,
you have to make a decision in that moment, like
am I going to continue to make myself vulnerable and
embarrass myself in front of these people? Like like should
I keep doing that? Is that good for me? You know?

(18:36):
But if you're lucky enough, you'll find out that you
are a glutton for punishment, and then you'll keep on
coming back to the ship over and over again. If
you're lucky enough to be a glutton for punishment, you
can make a career out of this. You can do
something with it. You can do something like real comedy
with your life. That's part of it. Man. You have
to go through it. We've all seen, We've seen legends.
Just eat it, absolutely know, and it's just part of it,

(18:59):
even after you're already doing your thing, like the stars
don't always a line, no matter how much do you are,
And it's like, but that's the that's part of the
excitement and the adrenaline of it, like, oh, lets see
how it goes? Like you know, when you're in a slump,
just like you know, sometimes I'm up there and either
because I'm sick of my jokes or I'm just not
feeling it, or my mind's elsewhere and I just can't
get locked in. But then you always break out of

(19:22):
that slump. And usually when I break out of it,
like when I'm filling mediocre on stage for like three
or four sets in a row, five sets. Man, it
depends what's going on in your personal life, all kinds
of factors in right. But then when you break out
of it, Usually when I come out of those somethings,
I come out and take it to another level even more.
You just feel, you know, tapped into some whole other
ship and you're like taking people on a whole another journey,

(19:44):
and it was like, bamn, here we are. So it's
like it's it's it's such a beautiful art and dope thing. Man.
It's because it's just you and the mic, and especially
when you're going to crowds that paid to be there,
like when you're starting out, you're in these rooms people
some people don't even know it's comedy night at some bar,
and they're many like nineties pop trivia, yes, and so
you're already looking at you like guys performing for free

(20:07):
right right, Yeah, I wanted to be trivia night. They
want to do some karaoke shout out all the karaoke
clubs out there too, because that's my number, is carry
this fool will go on karaoke night tours in the area,
like by himself, right, Like okay, sing a little ys here,

(20:29):
a little snoop dog, Like when when we go on
the road with you, bro, Like you make flyers for
the comedy shows, I make flyers for all the karaoke clubs.
I'm gonna hit up hey this this Saturday. I'm gonna
be in Miami with Reggie Keone is What'll be doing
the comedy ship, but I'll also be at Ray Raised
Lounge or I'm gonna be singing Snoop Doggy Dog nothing
but a g thing four times come through. That's my

(20:53):
ship right there, bro oh man. So, and then for
your birthday every year you're a three, and I know
this year you went, Man, you had got your car
broken into You're supposed to go to vacation because you
like to travel, and then and then all of a
sudden and so but you still you're like, you know what,
I'm gonna get this TRADEO. It's my birthday, and you

(21:14):
and you had it like a Homies auto body I
had in my Buddies auto body shop and we just
kind of had just kind of like a get together.
Well he was actually fixing my car while I had
the Trio there, so it's actually it was like it
was a to stop deal, you know what I'm saying,
Like we're gonna get my car fixed and he's gonna
provide the space to have a trio. And Bro, like
a trio is you know for for like old school Mexicans.
That's just like that's the official you know, We're gonna

(21:37):
have a little celebration and it's not gonna be anything
over the top, but this is like an official celebration.
You bring a trio in, you let them play for
two hours, and you just have something lot and just
they're like your jukebox. You just say whatever song you
want and the and the good one you play it.
But but with that being said, you do kind of,
like I don't want to say trick them. That's a
strong word, but you kind of let them do their

(21:58):
little performance knowing that you're gonna take the mic and
absolutely that's that's not even a honestly, this last trick.
Do you let their see her get it in They're like, okay,
it's a little extra fatia. And then you know this
last time I told him, I said, look, I got
you guys for three hours, and I appreciate every minute
of it, but just know that at the one and
a half hour mark, I'm taking over. Okay, So you

(22:20):
just I'm gonna just needed three give us a little something.
Let me see that, all right, PELI see that, and
then come me. You know that's the right come on
right right, And I'm not even I'm not even trying. Dog,
I woke up like this you know that bad with

(22:41):
the harmonies, Dog bro, I don't know. I mean, I
just I'm looking dog like Mexicans. I think who said
it best? I'm paraphrasing, but I gam to. I saw
a clip of him receiving an award on Instagram and
they were like, you know, you have a great way
for you have a great feel for the darkness of life,
but also you have a way of making a jovial

(23:02):
and hilarious They were like, and they asked him, why
is that? Because you noticed his movies really do have
like that that uh, those two elements that dynamic. It's dark,
but it's also there's also some positivity to it. And
they asked him, They're like, why is that? And he
had a great he had a great answer, dog and
he was like, because he goes I'm Mexican man, he
goes on Mexican like in the Mexican culture, like not
only we look at death like you know, that's something

(23:24):
to be celebrated because you know, we're all headed there,
you know what I'm saying. So it's like I wanna
I want to enjoy life to the fullest, you know
what I'm saying. Like every single time I get a
chance my birthday comes along. I'm like, this is just
a reminder man that you know, we're not here for
a long time. Dog, We're not We're not here for
a long time. So we should be here for a
good time as long as we have time. That's the
main thing right there. You know, Yeah, you're right like always,
I mean, death is always dead. It could be very

(23:46):
sad and very like, but you know, i mean celebration,
that's a positive thing. Like Folds are celebrating and it's
like we bring you know, gifts and the photos and
the you know, I remember putting out like a Nintendo
cartridge and oranges or whatever for the you know, for
that and who celebrates dead like death is something that
you would be like the other was more those day

(24:07):
of the Dead. It just sounds so bleak, like who
the funk would it go out of their way to
celebrate that. Mexicans, we're gonna celebrate that ship, right, We're
gonna make a We're gonna make a show out of this,
you know, because that's really what life is man in
a lot of ways. Just it's just one big show.
Doc It's just one big show. And then as soon

(24:28):
as the as soon as the curtain comes down, it's
a wrap. That's a pitch in the dirt for ball
four and that's another one for Himenez. Looks like Keller
seen enough of the night jeen year old rook and
the bullpen continues to be a not so bright spot
for this ball club. As we make another pitching change,
it's a perfect time to introduce our special guests from

(24:48):
the American Council for Partisian Culture. It's out for douchy Bru.
How you doing that for Doucy good bro so Bru. Now,
today's Partisian Heritage Day at the park and I must say,
you have a lively, lively group here. It's nice, Bro.
My people come together. Four party. No bullsh other stadiums. Bro.
They think their party, Bro, they think their party. They

(25:10):
no party, Bro, They no party. They're like, oh, give
me fifteen dollar piece beer, bro and soggycho Bro. Okay,
let me put sogno in helmet Bro. Make it worth
twenty three dollars bro. Bullshit Bro. Yes, the stadium has
definitely made some upgrades over the years to make sure
the fan experience as second to none. They used to

(25:31):
only have garlic fry ket Or carding, big bag for lock, Polish,
hot Dog Larish bro Okay, sore So cutting candy peanuts,
but now they have spicy crispy to No Bro bro Okay,
Russian Perowski, bro Okay bro Chinese soup dumb bro lamb Chicken.
Looks like Keller is going with a sixteen year veteran

(25:51):
Jack Percy. His five point three e r A isn't
anything to write home about. But the thirty eight year
old Righty has been known to deliver. But my favorite
thing here, Bro, it's traditional partition dessert bro Okay. That's
molly cream circle bro orange shut but and creamy popsicle
with one fifty mins of M D M A. Bro,
I'm tripping bulls Bros. Wild pitching the dirt gold mass

(26:15):
does a great job to recover and hold Takahashi a
third That seems like a lot of M D M
A per creamsicle. Why don't you say I for Ducy.
That's kiddy stop Bro I ate three during first dating, Bro,
No Bushy, I can see your section is really getting
into the ball game over there. Looks like they're giving
each other backrupts. Yes, Bro, they give each other Backrob

(26:35):
Bro massage Bro for good time for makeout and dance
Bro dancing dancing party. Bro Here He'll take to the
next level. Bro. He here, bro here, Bro, I brought
one for you to try Bro partition traditional des Bro
M d M A creamsicle. Bro here try for you. Bro. Okay, sure,
I'll try one. Let's see here. Wow can barely tell

(27:00):
the M d M A. This is a really great creamsicle.
Huh delicious duchess for starters, Bro Okay, my people Rosso
Uncle Kaine mescal and d MT sugarcube Bro. And that's
very popped out. Pro Plexio for clinical depression Bro PCP
extasy Harry Potter, Bro my granted juice. Bro. I called
my mother every day Bro to tell her I love you. Bro.

(27:22):
We gotta full count here, runners will be going if
for mirrors connects Percy winds up and the pitch swing
and strike three. The old guy still has it. That
should pump up the pitching staff. That brings us to
the seventh inning stretch. Ladies and gentlemen Afroducci as our
special guests, we would like you to lead us in
the age old tradition. This be my pleasure. Bro dig

(27:52):
me up to the ball game, Bro, dig me for
the crowd. No, Bush, I need some Molly creams cord. Bro.
I don't care if I never go home, Brong, Let's
get fucked up for party. If they don't win, I

(28:13):
don't care, Bro, for it's one, two, three heats of
molly at all game for party, Bushy. Wow, all of
a sudden, I feel like dancing dance Bro for party.

(28:33):
Oh gosh, I'm feeling a lot of horny here. Okay, Bro,
don't get crazy. Bro. You're on air. Bro, Okay, chill, Bro,
All right, well rolling by. All's out here. Okay, Bro, relax,
it's take it's a commercial break. Let's take commercial. Bro.
You're peeking. Bro, you're pecky. I love your afronuc I

(28:55):
love you too, Bro, No bullshit, we got that laughterfore
your soul and now Toto on this show. But the
thing that throws that throws people off about me in
terms of sports, storm and this is the one thing
that back at home, this is what really gave me
thick skin, like fun comedy. What gave me thick skin

(29:18):
was being a Dodger fan in the Bay Area. And
I'm a die hard, die hard. What's the story with
that because your dad was a Dodger fan or something.
So you know, if you know, if you know a
little bit about like baseball history. Back in the eighties,
there was a young man from Sonora, Mexico that was
brought in to play for the Dodgers, A big, chunky
dude with a beautiful bob haircut at the time, you

(29:40):
know what I'm saying. His little he didn't have his
glasses yet because his eyes weren't bad just yet. But
he was left handed. He threw a screwball. He was chunky.
Who could that. He had a muffin top. You know.
It was beautiful, man, it was gorgeous. He had little
skinny legs with the fat body, classic Mexican body, you know.
And for now, the Valezuela took the nation by storm,
and every Mexican in California at least became a Dodger.

(30:01):
Mexican A worldwide became even if you hated the Dodgers,
if you were Mexican like like that. Yeah, man, And
he had that belly like he looks like he just
got done in a twelve pack of tackles, you know,
and it was just out there dominating. It was so
exca like a potluck softball Sunday body, but dominating. And
you know, back in the eighties they were those tight
as pants. So the legs are super skinny, but the

(30:24):
but the upper half was plump. It was he was
the dude where like by the third inning his shirt
was just gonna become untucked and you just had to
deal with that. You know, there was no way around that.
You couldn't strapped that belt up tight enough. So I
fell in love with with the notion, with the idea
for Anoderls, just like my pops did. Man, and ever
since themn bro like luckily like for me, like as

(30:45):
a sports fan, once I latch onto a team, that's
my team, that's my and I always say, like if
I had a kid, you know, and he wanted to
be a Giants fan, I'd be like, no, cheer for
whoever you want, but just the important thing is to
stick to that team. Wherever you cheer for, line, but
just stick to that team. So that's how I'm riding
with the Dodgers to the very end. Man, Yeah, all day,

(31:06):
not like the brand new Warriors fans that came all
of a sudden when I started waiting. I mean that happens,
you know. You know what I do like the you
know what, I always like basketball. I'm really into it.
Yes it happens sometimes, but uh yeah, anyways, this is
not a sports pod, right, yeah, you see, sometimes I
don't do it. You made me do I know. I

(31:27):
wanted you to get that in. You know what I'm saying,
because I know you're a big sports guys, right, just
get that in. But we got we got more important
things to talk about today. What's that. Well, there's something,
there's something that's been pressing. Well, the thing is, it's like,
you know, being on the road. I mean, we've been
touring together five years, as we mentioned, um, and sometimes man,

(31:47):
it's dope because we get to try all kinds of
different foods and stuff like that. Um. But the one thing,
the one thing that always kind of comes through is
a sandwich. You know, because when you're on the road,
you get a sandwich on me. It's good later for
the most part. Sometimes you know, like it's not like
you know, and it's easy to pack up, easy to
travel with. You know, boom boom. You get a sandwich

(32:10):
at the airport, I could take it on the plane.
With me, it's not a big deal. It's made for practicality,
like bringing a big bowl of you know, fried chicken
on the plane or that person. You know, it's like boom,
there's no compact situation if I see you with fried
chicken on the plane and I'm kicking you off myself
our share at least you can't say no the fried chicken.
But but yeah, offer if you're gonna bust it out
like that on the plane, but not uh but yeah,

(32:32):
no traveling you know, a sandwich so when many comes
clutch all the time, you could eat half of it.
You could put it in your backpack. Boom, we move.
And but what we one thing we were talking about was,
you know, because people would be like, well, you know,
a Mexican sandwich is you know, like yeah, good. But
to me and I think it's something that we agree on,

(32:52):
is you know, people say, oh, it's a Mexican sandwich.
That's a that's the way to describe to a person
doesn't know. Also is for for another reference, another reference
the different type of a different type of And there's
a difference too between that between that's exactly and all
the ways. But and then but then there's a difference

(33:14):
between and a sandwich, right right, And it's important to
point these things out, you know, people need to understand this.
It's about here's the thing, bro like, the reason I'm
so adamant about this idea that that's different than the sandwich.
First of all, shout out to all sandwiches. I love sandwiches.
I was raised on sandwiches, still make sandwiches to this day.
Some of my best friends are sandwiches. You know what
I'm saying. But what I'm trying, what I try to

(33:34):
tell people is that what I try to tell people, though,
is that you have to consider what a sandwich is. Okay,
And I always bring this back to the age old
debate about whether a hot dog is a sandwich or not. Okay,
let's let's start there. Yeah, this this has been a
debate that's been It's come up a lot actually to
this day of Americans believe that a hot dog is

(33:58):
a sandwich. Well wait, can we go fact chicken gon't
work for a Yes, that's more than half. Now, Now
here's the thing. You feel that way. I feel that way.
We both you know, reasonable men, you know, like we
know what we're what we mean when we say that
a hot dog is not a sandwich, and I agree

(34:19):
with you. But here's the thing though, if you don't
create that parameter that a hot dog is not a sandwich,
then you start going into the world of oh, well,
is a thorth a sandwich? And the reason it's not
a sandwich is just it's simple number one. It's more
fulfilling than a sandwich. A sandwich is a snack food.
A sandwich is Nobody eats a thor after having sex

(34:40):
and then go back to have sex. That's a meal.
You just had a whole meal. You have gardness sal
that you had by story, had a bunch of food
in there. That's a whole meal. Inside a sandwich, you
can knock get ham, chicken, a half a peanut, butter
and jelly, go back to ram jam exactly exactly bro.
So it's a snack more than more than it is
a meal. A thorth is not a snack. A thorth
does a whole meal. Second of all, you gotta look
at x Okay. The U s d A has described

(35:03):
the sandwich as uh two slices of bread, one on top,
one on the bottom, with either fish, beef, or poultry
in the middle of the two pieces, the keyword being
two okay athor in many occasions, is a piece of
bread that slice down the middle, connected at the bottom
with all the feelings on the inside. Now why is

(35:24):
this important to note? Because we have we have to
we have to create these parameters and understand them. Because
although you may be thinking yourself already, that's ridiculous. Come on,
that's a sandwich. If you slice it down the middle
and you just you know, have the bottom connected, that's crazy.
But let me ask you this, though, I dare you,

(35:45):
I dare you to go to Philly and tell people
that a cheese steak is a sandwich. You're in the
world of trouble. You're in the world of trouble because
exactly with the whiz all that, and and they will
never they will never bow down to the idea because
it's not And a and a cheese steak have a
lot of common they are you understand, cheese steak is

(36:07):
not a sandwich. And I dare you to say that
to somebody from Philadelphia. There's there's the thorth time, the
cheese that community. Really, they have a lot more in
common than than we like to admit. You know what
I'm saying, But we're basically cousins separated by a border,
you know what I'm saying, Like Philippa, Philadelphia is not
that far from Mexico in spirit, and and and and

(36:29):
the the the cheese steak is where we where we
find our common ground. So I think we need to
note these things. We need to point these things out
because the thorth is clearly not a sandwich for these
reasons that are just laid out for you, you know.
And if you don't believe me, look, if you don't
believe me, if it's too convoluted everything I just said,
just go to Philadelphia and tell somebody to give you

(36:49):
a Philly cheese steak sandwich, and you'll get smacked because
because they don't play, they don't play that, they're not
gonna allow you to to bring down devalue their their
their culinary, their foods. Well. And that's a great point
because there are some restaurants, yeah said um um. And
then they have sandwiches too, exactly, bro, you know what

(37:09):
I mean, Like other American menu like will make you
a cheeseburger, make you a sandwich. But we also right,
you know, we have those restaurants here in lass And
you know what, Dog, I'm glad that we're in l
A and we're talking about this, and I'm glad that
you just mentioned tacos, because there's another point to be
made here, you know what I'm saying, Like, we have
another reason why these parameters are important. Is because if
we allow people to call it thorta or a cheese

(37:32):
steak a sandwich when it's clearly a sliced piece of
bread where it's connected at the bottom and folded up
at the top. If we allow people to call that
a sandwich, how long, Frankie, before people know? How how
long before people call a taco a sandwich? And let
me tell you something, as long as I'm breathing, I

(37:52):
will never allow that. I will never allow that. That's crazy.
It'll be a cold day in hell before I let
somebody even play with the idea that a taco is
a sandwich. You know, but I know right now you're saying,
you're something like, oh, that's crazy, fool Like, nobody would
ever say that. Give it time. It's good time. It's
like when people like, as soon as lettuce goes into
a bridle, that's that's a wrap, right, it's a rap,

(38:13):
literally a fear to exactly, I'm not eating that ship.
I'm not. I don't soggy lettuce right right right, I
mean if I'm hungry, and that's how you do your
super reo. Okay, whatever, But but and and I've had
had some reals that do a good job of somehow
separating the letter. But it's like, to me, that's just
that's a lot of that's a lot of work, you know,
It's it's like, what are you doing? And so so

(38:34):
look at the end of the day, we're like, I
love sandwiches, you know what I'm saying, But I love
tort does And I think there are two different things
and we should respect that because look, we don't have
to we don't have to combine. Not everything has to
be like this hodgepodge of everything is the same. It's
just say no, just give each one of those two items.
It's respect. A sandwich is one thing. That's another thing.
That steak is felicchi steak with exactly sandwiches and that man,

(38:59):
I have one that is a good one. And and
and and they you know they usually put the refried beans,
they you know, paste that on and it's constructed different
than the sandwich. Ye, totally different. Sandwich is just made
the slapping on blah blah blah, you're slaping on you
making nice and tall or sometimes you even put a
third piece of bread in the sandwich. You would never

(39:20):
do that in you. That's not that's not even a
that's not an option because you're doing that. It's a
role because exactly exactly so we gotta, you know, we
gotta point these things out. And you know, I'm just
glad that you gave me an opportunity to point these
things out because I worry about the future sometimes and
I don't want the kids to be that's scary. You
mentioning somebody calling a tackle a sandwich. Could you imagine
that fall East, all the California would would burn down

(39:44):
if they if they just insisted on calling a taco
a sandwich. And I'm just I'm just saying, but I
felt it looked like a little sickness in my stomach
thinking that right, right, that's probably from the from that
sandwich that we had this morning left over. I'm saying,
the sandwich is coming cle mmmmmmmmm mm the sich my

(40:10):
cover you. Yeah, we want to listen to mate, Yeah,
the dis recursion from the first Yeah, I love let

(40:32):
us in my sandwich. Never written up a rito. Catch me.
I'm the one that went back in the bag of
cheetos and miss free throw. Ain't no thing to my team.
That's the end of the fourth that we're needing. By thirteen,
we get cheese, provolone, cheddar, the halapeno pepper jack. Even better,
A good sandwich always hits the spot. Sun that Dutch
grunches got your voice, brown mayonnaise, mustard, however you like.

(40:54):
You can even add hot sauce and every fucking bite.
Who so convenient when you need a quick meal. Now
you ratulating yourself how your belly feels. Put a deal
pickle on the sign and I said, crunching the ballots
to doubt chips and turn the party out. It doesn't
matter what time of day it is my bed night.
Give me your Yeah. We want to listen to mals

(41:18):
Toto selected Yeah the recursion the first day. Now when
I hear my tummy rumbling on my hat to give
me something, I had a little bacon in the sandwich.
Donna be jumping. I'm gonna get the munch in don't

(41:39):
forget the pickle into the pepper chini is about to
have you chokeing up a little. I don't cut it
down the middle. I slice it the diagonal. If they
got the rocks, gonna be magical. Spread the union Tactical
cheese is a must and I never been so. I
never cut the crust never. Yeah, we want to listen
to me else? Yeah, the dis recursion for the first stay. Yeah,

(42:16):
you know what I'm saying on me A sandwiches never
lets me down, even on the late Now to get
to the crib hale, peb and J comes through. Man consistent,
always available, guys goes nice to the glass of milk,
you know what I'm saying, or ship whatever what you want,
wheat bread, French roll, you know French did Ruben. What

(42:36):
you want me? You wanna h push from me? Okay,
what you want me? Wanna have sandwich? You want to
do a esteate? What turkey with a cat and bacon?
A classic calif I should so good on me? Yeah,
but the man names. But you want to have pickles?
You want pickles? Yeah? Sandwiches have always been in a

(43:00):
big part of my life for me, my my dad
and my mom. And you know my dad was, you know,
pinching his pen. He's trying to make it move bologny
sandwiches on me. But he you know, he showed us
the move where you you know, you fry the put
the bologny on the in the you know, in the pans,
so it gets a little blistered up in the middle.
And that's a hitter, homie. That's a goods called And
even my dad was would be like making man a

(43:21):
sandwich or something straight up the glass of milk. That's
called an imagination Sandwich's just imagining all the foods in there.
Oh man, yeah, yeah, all man do that all Manna's
next time you see. My dad asked him, say it
was up with the Mannai sandwiches. But everybody check your cholesterol. Man,
that's a lot a lot of man. I'm still here, SWI, Rudy,

(43:42):
what you're telling me like that? Sorry, I'm sorry about that.
I'm sorry about that. For a minute. Sandwich right now,
I'll take I'd be honored to have one of your
dad's Manna sandwiches, a little mustard on it, a little spread,
a little by his roles. Home. We're gonna sit down
with that man. Through that respect the og in the
sandwich ways. Oh man, thank you Rudy for coming coming

(44:02):
so much. Is there anything else you want to talk
about mentioning? Man, what kind of you know, what can
we talk about here? Man? I mean, you know, I
think we covered the important stuff. We definitely got through
the sandwich talk. You had bullet points ready, but I
was ready because this is this I'm just passionate about this, man.
But you know, I just I just want to thank
you so much for having me on. Man. It's like
it's been the last five years I've been like reading

(44:22):
really incredible. So this is like just a nice little
cherry on the on the umpie for all of it. Man,
you're my guy, man host with the most man brother.
I don't know how many shows you've hosted for me already.
It's been a lot, and it's been a honter. We've
got to travel the country and you know, I remember,
you know, doing gigs back in the day with you
or it's like, oh man, you know, I hope we
get paid or you know we're gonna get back home,

(44:44):
but dude, or like like the comic strip and El
Passo shout out to the comic strip and is that place?
Is this still up and running? Yeah? Yeah, man, And
I remember remember the comic trip the first time. The
first time we went down there was like the dressing
room was just like it was like the broom closet,
you know what I mean. It was like, okay, then
they had a broom closet. Odor definitely ran had a
couple of buckets of a couple of buckets, couple of mobs,

(45:06):
and I was like, wow, but you know what those
crazy because we were so excited. I was so excited
to be there, even though that was in comparison to
like the things we'll passing. One of my favor what
do they call it, chuko shout out some good. You
could accidentally walk into Mexico if you're not careful out there.
You met my theal my yeah, my Josierra is the

(45:30):
chief of the nation right right there. And Indian Reservation
right there, dude, and you took us and you took
us in uh. And I just remember thinking to myself
like that, this this place feels very spiritual, like his
house felt very spiritual. You know, it was like clean,
It was like healing, like a healing feel. When we
walked up in there and then Uh, I think I
don't know if he was. Was he chief for you

(45:51):
when you guys met him? But here I want to
see it now. So was that it was like I see,
is that beyond chief? That's chief? That's chief? Okay. I
don't know if I feel maybe he was, because I
think there was like that you were making that point
like you know, my uncle's the chief, you know, um,
But I don't know if I don't remember for for
sure though, but it was the dope best time, man,
Like I could say that I met a chief, I
met a real chief in real life. You're still out there.

(46:14):
They're out there, man, they exist sandwiches to sandwich all day.
But yeah, so anything you want to plug for anybody,
you know, anything you've got going on, because yeah, I
mean absolutely. I mean, if you guys want to come out,
I got a show coming up in back in the
East Bay, UM on Friday the twentieth, January twentie. I
don't know when this is gonna air, but yeah, January

(46:34):
twenty over at the Washington End. It's called Comedy Oakland.
I'll be headlining there and then I'll be back on
the road with you man. When we had a riverside
Riverside February fourth, Sacramento, California. Yes, sir, at the Guilt Theater, right, Yeah,
it's gonna be a good time. The Crest Theater even better. Yeah,

(46:54):
but at the Crest Theater. Yeah you said it. R
Rudy ye yeah. Man. If you want to check out
what I do, just follow me on Twitter and on Instagram.
It's Rudy Ortiz I T S r U, d Y
or t Z. And if you want to hear me
in the morning, if you're in the Bay area, man,
just check out kab Alex one or two point nine
from six to nine freskin Rudy in the morning. Thank
you again, Frankie, I appreciate you. Doug. All right, y'all,

(47:15):
Thank you, Rudyo all right for Homie Frankie on this one.
Love y'all, see you next time. That for tuning into
another episode of The Frankie in Your Next Show, presented
by Will Ferrell's Big Funny Players Network. Shout out to
the homies Haign So, Olivia, Nick the Homie earned Dog
here in the studio, James Fritz, Kevin Kamia, Bobby d

(47:37):
J Buzz, the legendary soul assassins by me. You know
how we do, Homie. Thank you for giving it. I
saw an opportunity of get down and if you get
a chance. Told me it's go ahead and rank and
review the podcast or continue living your life. We'll see
you on the next episode of The Frankie Next Show.
That's what's soft break there