S2 Ep. 10 - “THE MASSAGE”

Jeff and Susie discuss *The Massage* from Season 2.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
You can watch the original episode we'll be discussing in
every other episode of HBO's Curby Your Enthusiasm, including the
new and final season, on Max. You can also watch
the video version of the history of Curby Your Enthusiasm
podcast on Max and YouTube as well.

Speaker 2 (00:16):
Links available in the episode description.

Speaker 1 (00:26):
So we are on season two, episode ten, The Massage
and amshusiasm?

Speaker 2 (00:32):
The Massage? The Massage? Who are you? Oh, I'm Jeff Darland.
I'm Baron von Digression because I will digress. I'm just
prepping you this episode. In all episodes, I digress.

Speaker 3 (00:45):
I think any of our listeners know that already.

Speaker 2 (00:47):
They do. But Susie is always on point, So have
no fear at my digressions because we'll always get back
to it.

Speaker 1 (00:53):
Okay, So we open the episode with a meeting with
Julia and you and Larry and Julia's manager, and Julia
doesn't want to do this Evelyn show any longer.

Speaker 2 (01:03):
Which you can't blame her.

Speaker 1 (01:05):
No, she's had she's had it with Larry. It's a
great idea, of course, it's a great idea, but the
problem has been Larry, as it usually.

Speaker 2 (01:12):
Is it is. But you know what I love about
that scene. Everybody in that scene has purpose. Jane Carr,
who plays the manager who really lays into Larry, Julia
who's really frustrated Larry, obviously Larry, but especially myself. You
want to make it happen. No, no, yes, that's my
motivation in there. But everything I say is perfect, not

(01:36):
in terms of perfect look at me perfect. I'm saying
in terms of it helps the scene move along. And
Julia really she gave me a big compliment, especially upcoming
in the CBS meeting, how I don't say anything. And
the truth is I love not saying anything in a scene.
I really do. And the most frustrating thing for me
is when there's really nothing for me to say in

(01:59):
a scene, but yet Larry and Jeff Shaeffer to talk
about this, and I always feel like I'm shoehorning myself
into the scene.

Speaker 3 (02:08):
Then it becomes the exposition issues.

Speaker 2 (02:11):
Do you know how many times when you're speaking with Larry,
I just sit there and I don't say a word
because you two are going at it and it's like,
how am I going to help this? How will I
move this forward? I won't, So I love naturally, believe
it or not. Listeners listeners. Who am I saying listeners
believe it? Well, no, I've often say that, believe it
or not. Though I like being still and quiet in

(02:34):
the scene and observing.

Speaker 1 (02:35):
And actually, what I noticed, I think was it was
in this episode, or maybe it was in the one before,
is that in the earlier days you were actually quieter. Well, yeah,
but I think that's how it was written in the
earlier day.

Speaker 2 (02:47):
No, no, no, no. My natural instinct in doing this
work is to not say or do anything, do action
whatever is required of me. But I sit and wait.

Speaker 3 (03:00):
And by the way, I do think you were more
laid back in the earlier episodes.

Speaker 2 (03:06):
Yeah, because I was in denial about my life. I
was maybe maybe lots of food. My visits to craft
service calm me.

Speaker 1 (03:14):
So Larry claims he's a victim of circumstances. And then
they decided they can't go to HBO is done, ABC
has done Fox, He refuses for political reasons, CBS is
left and Larry and you remember.

Speaker 2 (03:26):
Those those times where there were five choices and we're
obviously not on the show gonna although we did it
in the hour, we're not gonna say we'll go pitch
it to HBO. It's two meta you know, it's just
it's nonsense.

Speaker 1 (03:38):
Well, the HBO's already out because of the Alan Wasserman
and the and the Shrimp.

Speaker 2 (03:42):
Oh fuck yeah, no no, no, no, no, no, it
was already out. Did we We didn't even pitch to them.
I don't think in the in the Shrimp episode it
was clearly Larry since he backed out in the hour.

Speaker 4 (03:56):
No there was.

Speaker 3 (03:56):
The Shrimp episode was after the backing out in the hour.

Speaker 2 (03:59):
No. I know. What I'm saying is he saw Larry
in different terrible circumstances after it.

Speaker 1 (04:06):
Was so as the HBO was out for those reasons.

Speaker 2 (04:09):
So and Larry claims one more.

Speaker 1 (04:11):
Shot and he'll do all the work in the pitch,
Julia doesn't have to do anything, and you're backing him
up there, and.

Speaker 2 (04:18):
Which, by the way, is the way I like to
pitch if I'm involved with the show, especially with the writing,
I like going in by myself. I just did it
the other day with HBO. I talked to the head
of comedy and made my suggestion for what show we
should do next. And I was by myself very comfortable
in person. In person, No, even though we get tested

(04:41):
every day I can't even with the head of HBO.
You think I could do that one? Nope?

Speaker 1 (04:47):
And which is it's always better in person pitching something
like pitching is always better in person. Okay, So Julia
agrees to one more shot. Larry's gonna do everything. Julia
doesn't have to do anybody way.

Speaker 2 (04:58):
When he's sitting in there and he's imagining the psychic,
that's not yet. Oh, my mistake, that's not yet. And
then we see you, Oh, I know we've agreed to
do CBS. We haven't pitched the CBS. My mistake, ok.

Speaker 1 (05:11):
Right, And then you and Larry are walking and you're
talking about they needed reassurance and you gave them reassurance.
And then we see a guy with the sandwich board
sign don't stare, come on home.

Speaker 2 (05:25):
I just read about that in the paper. It's called
scarlet letter punishment. And by the way, I don't know
who that guy is. He might have been just a
background guy because he doesn't talk. Boy did he look
sad and he like I'm saying, it wasn't just like
where a bad exp It must have been somebody that
we looked at for as an actor to play that.

(05:47):
Because I can't see a background doing that, and.

Speaker 3 (05:49):
It wasn't a true person. That's the kind of thing
sometimes person.

Speaker 2 (05:52):
And by the way, in all years of our show,
whenever we use the they've done great, they've done great,
there's no exceptions.

Speaker 1 (05:59):
It's kind of a yeah, well, because they understand what
the show is, they do, but they're still So he's
wearing a sandwich board sign.

Speaker 2 (06:05):
It is they're not nervous in front.

Speaker 1 (06:07):
Of le Okay, so he's wearing a sandwich board sign
that says I am a shoplifter. And apparently this is
a scarlet letter punishment that's going around.

Speaker 2 (06:17):
Is that a real thing? By the way, I don't
think so, but I'm sure it's happened. And by the way,
I know for sure that that scarlet letter sign line.
I know that was written because I wouldn't improvise scarlet lets.
So it's a scarlet letters times in the show where
it's written exactly what's the kind of.

Speaker 1 (06:36):
Thing that's that that's in the outlines yea. And you
don't necessarily have to say that either, but it was.

Speaker 2 (06:42):
A good thing to say.

Speaker 1 (06:43):
And so we establish that there is this thing that
we don't know if that's a real thing.

Speaker 3 (06:48):
Or not right in real life.

Speaker 1 (06:51):
And then there's a guy who passes says solo to
Larry and Larry didn't want to have a stop and chat.
And that was the guy who who runs the restaurant.
He's the matri d at the restaurant, at the hotel
that you're staying it. I thought found it a little
odd that at the hotel, yes you are, you're staying
at the w because we split up.

Speaker 2 (07:08):
No, yes you are established. I was thinking that you
were talking about Larry. No, I am so hotels I
found for the first season.

Speaker 1 (07:20):
Yes, but I found it odd that he didn't say
hello to you too, because you're in that restaurant all
the time. But I was not thinking when we were
he said hey, Larry, and Larry didn't want to do
a stop and chat.

Speaker 2 (07:31):
But the awkwardness of that was so beautiful. That was
played by Steve Sheridan, who I was in Second City with,
as I always say, a wonderful person, sweet man, but
the look of confusion and disappointment on his face, he
couldn't have played it better. It was that's the same
thing with the guy, but was also good about the
sign guy. And Steve was, you know, if you watch

(07:56):
the show that this is not just going to be
forgotten the scarlet let.

Speaker 1 (08:02):
You know, because everything comes back to buy him, yes always,
and you tell him it's rude and you have a
whole issue.

Speaker 3 (08:08):
He's got all these rules.

Speaker 1 (08:10):
You have all these rules, you know, and it's true,
he has all these rules, and you never know if
you're crossing the line with him or not.

Speaker 2 (08:16):
What if I told you no kidding around that Up
until this point, I thought that was the best improvising
I've done on the show. When I went into him
with his rules and the whole thing, it felt like
a flow more than anything I'd done up until that point. Yes,
surprise me, And just that little moment I'm watching it
going oh you you were so like that whole moment

(08:38):
from seeing the guy with the board to the stop
and chat Larry making his rules and then my reaction
to all of it, I was really and by the way,
it's something that small that I can look at myself
and went, yeah, that is really great work. Look at you,
not me getting a big laugh, not me, Oh the
focus is on me. Fuck that. This is me being supporting.

(09:00):
I'm a supporting actor and really serving the scene not
very often. That's the first time that I felt that.

Speaker 1 (09:06):
I don't know if that's true. But okay, it's true.
I know it's true that you felt it. I don't
know if it's true. It's the first time. Okay, we
cut too. He's at home and Cheryl and Wanda are
stuffing envelopes, probably in our DC or something like the way.

Speaker 2 (09:20):
What's beautiful about that is that no one stuffs envelopes
any email I know, which, by the way, is one
of the great things about the Internet and computers is
the more stuffing. No more stuffing. Although who doesn't love
a good handwritten letter.

Speaker 3 (09:36):
It's true, it's quite lovely to get one.

Speaker 2 (09:38):
Yeah, ideal Jeff sends them all the time. Real Jeff
doesn't even write email.

Speaker 1 (09:43):
No, it doesn't even it doesn't even respond to text.
I don't Who are you telling? And then we establish
that Cheryl is going to Kim her psychic, and the
psychic is incredible. Last time Cheryl went, Kim told Cheryl
that Larry was going to get a hole in the world.

Speaker 2 (09:59):
No, no, no, it's Larry points that out of course. Last
time she was dead on. Oh she's great.

Speaker 4 (10:06):
Yeah, she told Cheryl that I was going to get
a hole in one and golf and I got a
hole in one.

Speaker 2 (10:11):
Wow, that's amazing, It's almost magical.

Speaker 4 (10:13):
She also told Cheryl I was going to have a
bad time in Hawaii, which which I did, but.

Speaker 2 (10:19):
Yeah, only you could have a not only hole in one.
But what I think is the great line of bad Yeah,
which is a given. But what was great also was Wanda.
Wanda sykes her reaction. She is great with subtle sarcasm,
subtle sarcasm that Larry doesn't even notice, you know, And

(10:42):
she said, oh, how that's really you know, it was
the way she did it. I mean, it was just so,
you know, Larry being an idiot, and.

Speaker 3 (10:49):
But look who has a bad time in Hawaii?

Speaker 2 (10:51):
Larry.

Speaker 1 (10:52):
And then also her friend Carrie was going to get
pregnant the shit. So we're establishing that the psychic is
really good, really really good. I have a hard time
believing that Larry actually believes in a psychic, but so
be it.

Speaker 2 (11:04):
It works for the episode. No, no, no, hold on, look
at the things he believed in hold So of course
he believes, but in a way that's imaginative. It's not real,
you know.

Speaker 1 (11:16):
And then Wanda sets up that. The good thing about
Kim is she doesn't hold back. She'll tell you bad news.
A lot of times you go to these psychics, they
only tell you good news what you want to hear.

Speaker 2 (11:25):
Kim does not. She'll tell you the bad shit too.
You know what our show doesn't have, and I was
talking about Larry, we don't have red herrings. Like you
watch a cop show. They introduce something that makes you
think something's going to happen and it doesn't. That's it's
a red herring, which I don't even know the exact definition,
but that the derivation, you know. But it's something where
they send you down a path that you think you're
going and you're not going there. We don't have that

(11:48):
for the purpose of fooling and that. We have the
opposite of that, I know we do, but nothing drops
between the cracks. If something happens early in the episodeoff,
they'll be a payoff. Yep.

Speaker 1 (12:00):
We cut to You're at the golf course, you and Larry.
What the fuck was that hat you were wearing?

Speaker 2 (12:04):
Jeff, that's a kangle hat. I know you're wearing it backwards. No,
that's how they're supposed to be worn. Most some golfers.
It's funny. But what's so funny about that is I
actually wore a kangle hat, a white one. I don't
think I still have like that backwards in my life
day to day. Really, I didn't realize, how goofy do

(12:25):
you wear that? Now? No? No, I'd be an imbecile
to wear it now. I'd be so you know, not
self aware.

Speaker 3 (12:32):
And Larry's pet peeve.

Speaker 1 (12:33):
As we know in real life, they're playing slow in
front of him, they're lining up their putts. He's getting
all tense and upset about it and out of proportion
to the reality.

Speaker 2 (12:44):
And you suggest he goes, here's one I want we're missing.
That is fascinating to me. Just the other day I
forgot this episode that we did this in fake World,
and I probably asked him back then. I said, when
you play golf, which you every Saturday, do you have
a lot of problems with the people ahead of you?
He's not very often, but if I do, I call

(13:07):
the marshall. And I thought that term calling the marshal,
what does that mean? There's a marshal on a golf
course to make sure everything goes smooth. And I asked
Larry if he carries a gun. Never mind, But the
point is he hates that. But what he hates worse
is when the people behind him catch up. He can't
hit a golf ball because he gets nervous because people.
He goes, I don't need to know, and in this

(13:28):
episode he goes, I don't need And then I didn't
even realize that is the exact truth of Larry on
the golf.

Speaker 1 (13:35):
And later on we have a few references in the
whole episode with norm right about the slowness. Oh yeah,
that comes, yeah, yeah, okay, but you suggest he goes
to your massuse and it's going to be your treat,
and he says, I can't hit in front of an audience.

Speaker 3 (13:50):
He's all tense, and Little Black cut to he's at
the messusse.

Speaker 2 (13:54):
Well, hold on, let me take a step back. You know,
when I'm saying to Larry, I got a masseuse, my treat,
that whatever happens with the massuse, it is trouble for him.

Speaker 3 (14:06):
But I don't think it was telegraph that it was.

Speaker 2 (14:10):
By Even when I was watching, I forgot what it
was because I haven't seen these shows in twenty five years,
twenty two years. But I knew I recognize. I go,
oh shit, Whatever I tell him about the massage, it's
going to reflect on him for the rest of the episode.

Speaker 3 (14:26):
Right and it does.

Speaker 1 (14:27):
Yeah, And cut to we're at the massuse and she's massaging.
Know that's a bad spot. You know, the shoulders have
body memory and whatever. The body has a memory. She says,
did you have trauma as a child?

Speaker 2 (14:39):
There was Wait one second before you do that. I
finally found a great messuse here in La, which has
saved me my neck is who doesn't matter why anyhow?
The point being is there are those massuses that you
see that really want to clean out your mind, Yes,
clean out your soul, as opposed to let me kill
these muscles. And there is something good to lightening your load,

(15:03):
but it's not for a masseuse to your load. Well yeah,
I didn't mean that, but a masseuse should really focus
on your muscles, not if you had trauma.

Speaker 3 (15:12):
Shrink.

Speaker 2 (15:12):
No. But I've been to numerous ones that think, and
I don't like it. I don't like it one bit.

Speaker 3 (15:17):
I don't like when they talk too much either.

Speaker 2 (15:19):
Oh, by the way, I used to talk too much
and then I don't say a word now. It's better
just relax. I used to reigate because I want to
know what their life was about. Yeah, that led them
to being a masseuse.

Speaker 5 (15:29):
We'll be right back, stay tuned, Okay, we're back.

Speaker 2 (15:43):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (15:43):
So Larry says, she yesked if he had any childhood trauma,
and he says.

Speaker 4 (15:47):
My mother did throw me against a brick wall when
I was an infant.

Speaker 2 (15:50):
Maybe maybe that's how good it. Yeah, I think it
hurt at all?

Speaker 4 (15:57):
Wow?

Speaker 2 (15:58):
Yeah, And have you ever talked her about this? Maybe? Yeah.

Speaker 4 (16:03):
I've mentioned it to her a couple of times.

Speaker 2 (16:06):
She's okay with that.

Speaker 4 (16:08):
Yeah, she said I was a little prick.

Speaker 2 (16:11):
But the point being here with is he plays it
so straight that it almost seems really really real, because
sometimes you just got to put a gentle spin, never
a big spin, but a gentle spin where just the
tone of your voice slight, you know. But this was
very real and absurd, beyond believable.

Speaker 3 (16:30):
And first of all, he was an infant. How would
he remember it?

Speaker 2 (16:33):
You know? Not that but the idea of throwing into
a brick wall, which is about his with child abuse,
that's pretty bad. That's pretty bad.

Speaker 1 (16:42):
And the messus says, the whole body does better when
there are no blockages, and would you like me to
finish you off? Now, I have to say, I believe
that he didn't know what that meant.

Speaker 2 (16:53):
By the way, if someone said that to me, unless
I'd been hoping or I've been told, I would not
think at all that she'd be touching my wiener.

Speaker 1 (17:02):
And I didn't know until this episode that there was
such a thing as a happy ending.

Speaker 4 (17:08):
It.

Speaker 2 (17:08):
Yes, I didn't know. Oh I hate that turn, you know,
happy ending, because I don't know how happy she could
be jacking you off for money. Hold on, she's jacking
you off for money for him, I know, but I
don't like that. But that's what it's called. I know,
but I don't like it regardless, Okay, I don't like.

Speaker 3 (17:25):
So she's giving him a hand job while she's chewing gum,
I believe.

Speaker 2 (17:29):
Which struck me. She's disconnected, exactly, a nonchalant.

Speaker 3 (17:34):
This is a job. This is what she does. She
gives people hand jobs.

Speaker 4 (17:40):
Hot stop stop stop, stop, stop stop.

Speaker 2 (17:49):
And he's like stop stop, no stop pots. He can't
get himself to say stops. He says pots twice and
then he gets his bearings and goes.

Speaker 1 (18:01):
Stop stop, stop, but he says, pots and his face
is just priceless.

Speaker 2 (18:06):
Yes, and she stops.

Speaker 1 (18:07):
Yeah, and we cut to you are in a meeting
in your office with Mike Binder. Mike Binder, yes, and
he Larry says to you, are you nuts? He comes
to confront you about giving him with this masseuse and
what's wrong with you is finish you off this whole thing?

Speaker 2 (18:22):
And Mike before he mentions that because it's really funny,
I'm looking at this scene now. Yes, I always have loathing,
I mean self loathing when I see how fat I was.
But I'm wearing a pair of glasses in this scene
that looked like someone would wearing an eye doctor's office.
If they're doing anything, it's just they're clear frames. They're absurd.

Speaker 3 (18:44):
Why are you wearing them?

Speaker 2 (18:45):
I don't know. Doors would show me a bunch of glasses.
I don't know if I was trying to be funny
or I was stupid, probably a combination, all right, keep
going so.

Speaker 3 (18:57):
Saying to you, and Mike Binder mentions that his care
what was the name of the show?

Speaker 2 (19:01):
I forgot the name of that's right inside the mind.

Speaker 1 (19:04):
The mind of the married man, right, and Mike Binder
says that his character in his show does that. He
goes to the messeuse who wants to give him a
happy ending, and Larry's like, well, I never saw it,
and he's like, you don't watch my show.

Speaker 2 (19:16):
That becomes a whole thing. Wait, wait, wait, wait, you're skipping,
which is really funny. I stopped it. You stopped it.
Who stops a whackle?

Speaker 4 (19:24):
If duped it after twelve pumps, you're still away either
zero pumps or like a thousand pumps. I don't know
how I did it so much, don't you.

Speaker 2 (19:35):
I don't know how I did it. Well, if I
stopped at twelve pumps, I would tell my wife.

Speaker 4 (19:40):
I'd go home that night and say, honey, I was
getting a massage and I took twelve pumps and I
stopped because I I will never ever ever tell her.

Speaker 2 (19:47):
I would. And you know what, if your wife hair
finds out you're a noble man, you made it.

Speaker 4 (19:50):
Step what she's not going to find out. Don't worry
about it.

Speaker 1 (19:53):
It was twelve pumps. And Mike Binder says that he'd
tell his wife. He would tell his wife.

Speaker 2 (19:59):
And Larry is, no, absolutely not. And that's when.

Speaker 3 (20:02):
Larry realizes that Cheryl is going to the psychic.

Speaker 2 (20:04):
Well, he says it out loud, doesn't he? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (20:07):
Yeah, And would the psychic know about the happy ending?
And you mentioned, by the way, there's a meeting at
CBS later that afternoon, and then Larry leaves, and you
say to Mike Brida, Hey, she's great.

Speaker 3 (20:17):
Do you want her number? Mike Bunder says absolutely.

Speaker 2 (20:19):
Oh. By the way, what's rare about that is generally
when Larry leaves a scene and you and I do
this all the time, we have some funny dialogue, it's
always cut and that's not Larry being no, it's story
per Yeah, it's like, is this driving the story? But
me saying to him do you want to? He says sure.
It shows that not everybody on the show is neurotic.

(20:40):
You know, we're both good with it. Yeah, I'll get
whacked off.

Speaker 1 (20:42):
Okay, well wait a minute, Hold on a minute, Jem.
You're saying that it's neurotic not to want a happy ending.

Speaker 2 (20:49):
Not necessarily, No, it's not wrong to not want one.
But think of the journey he takes to a not
getting it and be dealing with Cheryl. It's a big neurosis,
like For example, let's say I I stopped a woman hypothetically.
I'm saying oupathetically because I don't know that I could,
and she's done twelve pumps. I've said pots, I've said stop.

(21:13):
Do you think I'm ever going to mention that to
my significant other or that i'd be worried about?

Speaker 3 (21:20):
Let me let me ask you a question.

Speaker 1 (21:23):
Is getting a hand job from a masseuse cheating on
your significant other?

Speaker 2 (21:28):
I don't think so, you don't, I'll do I'll tell
you why. This is male female? No, no, no, no,
there's no emotional connection. You're totally it's a physical release
and once you're done, you're done. It's not it's like
all right here, because it is the way if you're
if you're having an emotional affair, which is worse than

(21:49):
having a physical.

Speaker 3 (21:49):
It doesn't it doesn't, it doesn't matter to me. It's
still sex.

Speaker 1 (21:53):
It's still the thing that that I do with my husband,
that we only do together. That's the thing that we
do together. Yeah, a sexual relationships.

Speaker 2 (22:01):
Pretend you're a messus.

Speaker 1 (22:02):
No, but maybe, but you know, it's him having a
sexual relationship with somebody else and having whatever's going through
his head. That's about the sex with somebody else. To me,
that's cheating, okay, that to you.

Speaker 2 (22:17):
To me if I had an emotional affair with anyone
or I had let's say, there's a pretty comedian and
I have sex with her, which by the way, has
never happened. I just want to make that clear. I
wasn't doing that hypothetical from my memory. My point thing is,
then it's an affair, that's just me. But by the way,

(22:37):
cheat a cheat cheatah, the cheatah is a cheatah at cheetah.
I remember We're sitting at chatcherizing star and I said,
how can Billy Joel cheat on Christy Brinkley? And you
looked at me and said.

Speaker 3 (22:52):
A cheetah is a cheatah is a cheatah.

Speaker 2 (22:55):
Yes, But I'm saying, even if you played a massseuse
game with this other woman.

Speaker 1 (23:00):
Like you said to me, you just said earlier that
you would never tell your significant other no, but why
if it's not cheating, why would you not?

Speaker 2 (23:08):
Because you want to know why a Jewish women who
don't appreciate that, not that other women don't appreciate it,
but there's a certain by the way, it's so appropriate
that you play my TV wife, because there are qualities
of you that are in my ex wife and my
girlfriend right now. There are things you share in common,
and I would be a dead man to say even

(23:30):
twelve I stopped dead. But that's their viewpoint.

Speaker 1 (23:33):
I don't want anybody touching my husband's penis but me
and him. Okay, I don't consider him touching himself cheating
by the way, yes, well.

Speaker 2 (23:42):
By the way, what if he's thinking about a messeuse
or another woman. I don't want to know. I don't
want to know as anger.

Speaker 1 (23:49):
I don't want to know what his fantasies are, right,
I don't want I have no interest in knowing what
you remember the.

Speaker 2 (23:54):
Episode that's coming up where I act to.

Speaker 1 (23:58):
Cheryl, Yes, oh yeah that one. Yeah, Well I don't
blame him for being Okay, so we'll get there.

Speaker 2 (24:03):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (24:03):
So Larry goes home and Cheryl made big plans for
the night to celebrate the CBS deal.

Speaker 3 (24:11):
She's got a limo coming and they're going to.

Speaker 2 (24:13):
I think is weird because her character copying Larry's real
wife is very ecologically thoughtful and a stretch limo.

Speaker 6 (24:22):
Correctly, but no, no, I'm just yeah, I agree, I
agree with whatever no, Ben just said, and they're going
to Moho at the w Hotel and that might be
too awkward because I didn't do a stop and chat
with the maitre d earlier.

Speaker 3 (24:34):
And it's it's horrible. It's the awkward as horrible.

Speaker 2 (24:37):
Have to talk to him?

Speaker 3 (24:37):
What I don't have to talk to these people. He
has a better idea.

Speaker 1 (24:41):
She's going to leave to go see him, the psychic,
and he suddenly wants to have sex with her to
distract her.

Speaker 2 (24:46):
And he's relentless, relentless. You see his face, and his
face is I am so fucked. I'm so fucked. What
can I do? What can you? And he tries the
sex one.

Speaker 5 (24:56):
My keys, I have an appointment with the psychic.

Speaker 4 (24:58):
I'm actually running. Let eight.

Speaker 2 (25:00):
Oh, I got him, I got him, all right, Well
I will see you there.

Speaker 4 (25:06):
I got a better idea.

Speaker 2 (25:10):
Right now, listen, listen, I have an appointment. I forget no, sorry,
I have an appointment.

Speaker 4 (25:14):
And take me along girl, and get this now right now.

Speaker 2 (25:19):
No, no, savey listen, I have got to keep going.

Speaker 4 (25:30):
You're gonna be you got a lump, and I'm afraid
she's gonna tell you about it.

Speaker 2 (25:34):
Do you hear what I'm saying, I'm dying. It's even hilarious,
even though we know he's not assaulting her. He's doing
everything to the idea and into bed. But and then
she's holding on to the side of the wall and
he's still pulling her. I think that's hilarious.

Speaker 3 (25:53):
And then he says, I've got a lump to tell.

Speaker 2 (25:55):
You about it running away from the go he goes
to the cancer and he says, I've got a lump
and I didn't want to tell you, and I don't
want you to find out to me. That's the hilarious point.

Speaker 1 (26:06):
Yes, so he doesn't want her to go to the
psychic because he doesn't want the psychic to tell her
about the happy ending, the twelve pumps. And then we're
in the CBS meeting and you know, the executives, so
I like it. It's an edge and Julia's doing her dance,
dancing around, and Larry is just not present at all.
He's traumatized. All he could think about is Cheryl is

(26:27):
at the psychic.

Speaker 2 (26:28):
Okay, also the flashback. Then he has the fantasy, which
is amazing because you can see but the idea that.

Speaker 1 (26:37):
Let's just describe it, that the flashback is that in
his mind, he's it's not a flashbackcause a fantasy sequence
that Cheryl is with Kim, who in his fantasy is
an Asian woman, and Kim is telling Cheryl that.

Speaker 2 (26:49):
Actress's name Amy Hill. If I do believe we were
lucky to get her because she's so great.

Speaker 1 (26:55):
Kim is telling her happy ending more than just a
massage pumped thirty two.

Speaker 2 (26:59):
Times, by the way, no better number than thirty two times.
Then she looks right and camera and goes and then whoosh,
that's right, and Larry wakes up out of it. He's
got to find his place, and then he's over enthusiastic.

Speaker 3 (27:13):
And then he's ridiculous in that meeting.

Speaker 2 (27:14):
I know, but yes he is. And by the way,
that goes to show if I may take a step back,
I personally, especially on Zoom, have fallen asleep during pitches.
If I'm not talking, I fall asleep the executive, the writer,
whoever's talking. I will not off because I'm almost always tired.
I can take a nap. And he's not that. No, no, no,

(27:36):
this was distraction, you know, I know, but I'm saying
I have felt something like that, and then you have
to wake up and recover if they're going to you
for anything. And also, and by the way, that's Norah
Dune and you're from Messin now and she's from Chicago.
I know her, you know. And the fact she says,
we'd love to be in business view on a pitch
that bad ye, Well it's Julia Wei Dreyfus gave it.

(28:00):
So basically those two know before they walk in the
room this is a done deal.

Speaker 1 (28:05):
Well, that's what Cheryl says, it's a done deal. That's
why she ordered the laying.

Speaker 2 (28:10):
And I've been involving situations where only one of the
people is somebody you'd want to work with, no guarantees.
They say no a lot to some of the biggest
writers and actors. I know that being said, if you've
got a great writer and a great actor one way
or another star, it's not who's going to say yes,
it's how soon will somebody say?

Speaker 3 (28:30):
Until Larry fucks it up?

Speaker 2 (28:32):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (28:32):
So Larry then goes home and Cheryl says, how does
it go? And she's sitting on the couch, clearly her
arms are folded, her body language, she's clearly upset, and
she says, I know everything Larry, I know what happened
now when.

Speaker 2 (28:46):
She says this, because I don't remember exactly what had happened.
I didn't remember. I thought that she might go the
other way. You've been blankety blank having nothing to do
with sex, Like she knows he's been up to something
no good. That may be true, but it's not sex.
And he's relie. She says something horrible, and he's relieved,

(29:06):
he believed. And I saw in my mind as she
would say that, and Larry do the opposite of what
you think. He would be very excited that that's all
it is. That was much.

Speaker 3 (29:16):
But that's not what happened, all right.

Speaker 1 (29:18):
Cheryl says, I know you're having an affair a woman
with long red hair and a.

Speaker 2 (29:23):
Tattoo of a star, which is amazing and great.

Speaker 1 (29:27):
And Cheryl's like, why would she make up a story
like that. Larry's like, no, no, no, maybe she's an
anti Semite. There are Korean anti semites. And then Cheryl
says she's not Korean, she's American. Larry denies, denies, no affair.

Speaker 4 (29:40):
Sorry, no, who's gonna have an affair with me?

Speaker 2 (29:43):
I'm not a cool guy.

Speaker 4 (29:44):
You gotta be a cool guy, to do.

Speaker 2 (29:45):
That's true. I couldn't do that. I wouldn't know how
what would I do?

Speaker 4 (29:48):
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (29:49):
You would not be good at it.

Speaker 4 (29:50):
It took me six months to even put a move
on you, I know.

Speaker 3 (29:54):
So she finally accepts, by the way, and believes him.

Speaker 2 (29:57):
I completely concur with him as someone who's not a
cool guy. I can't pull an affair off. I couldn't.

Speaker 1 (30:03):
Uh yeah, I mean my husband happens to be a
horrible liar.

Speaker 3 (30:07):
I would know so quickly if he was having an affair.

Speaker 1 (30:09):
Okay, So now they're going to go to the w
hotel and they're getting out of the limo and.

Speaker 3 (30:14):
Larry's Larry's concerned, but what's the driver going to do?

Speaker 1 (30:17):
Now?

Speaker 3 (30:17):
What are you going to do now? And concern for
the driver.

Speaker 2 (30:20):
And the driver? No, I'll be fine. And that was
Tom Booker from the Annoyance Theater in Chicago. I did
have quite the influence with casting I always have, but
then especially and Booker was so perfect for that role
because he could say without because it's a fine liary,
without splattering it in Larry's face. He could say, no,

(30:43):
I'll be fine to where if you have a heart,
you feel bad. But if you don't have a heart,
you're not gonna know shit. Yeah. And by the way,
the real Larry David has such a big heart. He's
so big heart.

Speaker 1 (30:53):
I always care about the drivers and I always make
sure they get said and stuff.

Speaker 2 (30:57):
Oh my god, Yes, yes, we'll be right back. Stay tuned.

Speaker 5 (31:12):
Okay, we're back.

Speaker 2 (31:13):
They're standing.

Speaker 1 (31:14):
There's a line and Rick, the Maitre d who Larry
did not stop and chat with, approaches them and sees them,
and Larry feels that it's chilly in here.

Speaker 2 (31:22):
He feels is a snub from him. And by the way,
Cheryl in this scene and in the scene that's coming up,
which is connected to the scene, who else could there's
a way that she plays it that's so unique and
so special. Yeah, I agree, you know, I just I
was watching her in this. She was with the whole
limo driver thing. It's something I can associate with because

(31:44):
I have this all the time in my life. No
good deed goes sons. I am so trusting and I'm
so I think about the other person so much that
someone might say to a fault, like how can you
be thoughtful and kind to a fault? But it bites
me and they ass I'd say, no.

Speaker 3 (32:00):
That's what this whole show is about.

Speaker 2 (32:02):
That I'm just saying.

Speaker 1 (32:03):
So Larry then starts complaining about having to do this
stop and chanybody have to talk to people and they're
they're eating, and that he has over he's overly concerned
about the driver. He's uncomfortable, he feels like he has
to hurry, so the limo driver is not waiting, he's
probably hungry. Cheryl talks about it's their favorite restaurant and
they ordered the same thing, and then should we should we.

Speaker 2 (32:25):
Buy the fact that he says he's unhappy that they
both ordered the same thing. That whole discussion hilarious.

Speaker 1 (32:33):
Yes, And should we order something for Greg the limo driver?
Should we give him a doggie bag? And Larry decides
that he's not going to eat all the shrimp, and
then he's on Cheryl about it you can finish that
last shrimp because he wants an extra shrimp for Greg,
because he cares more about Greg than Cheryl. At this moment,
he's ruining the romantic dinner and he goes out that
whole shrimp thing was really he really crossed the line

(32:55):
with that, right you know.

Speaker 3 (32:57):
And then he goes out and he gives Greg.

Speaker 2 (32:59):
He beats Cheryl down, he beats her, and she gives
that last shrimp that she wanted to do.

Speaker 1 (33:04):
And she's so unhappy and she has had it again
at this again.

Speaker 2 (33:08):
Who plays that better?

Speaker 1 (33:09):
No?

Speaker 3 (33:09):
Nobody.

Speaker 1 (33:10):
And you know, here's why she plays it so well,
because on a certain level, you say, well, why is
she even with him? Yet the way Cheryl plays it,
you understand why she's with him.

Speaker 2 (33:20):
Without it, even though well you feel that that's a
real relationship.

Speaker 3 (33:25):
I'll ask me all the time, why do you and
Jeff stay to get there?

Speaker 2 (33:28):
Oh, by the way, the answer is for purpose of
comedy on the show, because in real life you would
jump out of that mat y. I know I would.

Speaker 1 (33:37):
But there are plenty of marriages like that, Jeff. People
stop me on the street all the time and they say, oh,
you're exactly like me, or men say, oh, my wife
is exactly like you, or my marriage is exactly Jeff.

Speaker 2 (33:48):
That happens to me all the time. I can't imagine
how many times it happens to you. But don't you
just look at him and go, what the fuck you?
Get out? Get out? Because in real life. I know
for a fact I would have been out the first.

Speaker 3 (34:01):
Year, you know, but people stay.

Speaker 1 (34:04):
So now Larry goes out to give Greg the doggie bag.

Speaker 2 (34:07):
Yeah, some shrimp in there, just like leftovers.

Speaker 4 (34:13):
Well there there's shrimp, and you know, there's some rice
in there. But I did know. I didn't touch any
of the shrimp. I divided the rice very carefully. It's
all clean, it's all good.

Speaker 2 (34:24):
How much was he throwing? There's no fork, there's no napkin.
I can't.

Speaker 4 (34:29):
I'm sorry, I forgot the fork. I'll go I'll go get.

Speaker 2 (34:34):
Your fork, all right, napkin, that'd be great.

Speaker 1 (34:37):
And you could see Greg's a little nonplus that it's
leftovers and Larry's I didn't touch it.

Speaker 2 (34:42):
I divided this frustrated almost right point. He's frustrated, almost
to the point of being rude. Yeah, absolutely, yeah, you know,
And then.

Speaker 1 (34:51):
Greg says there's no fork, there's no napkin. How am
I supposed to eat this? And Larry's like, I'll go
get them. You know, I should have gotten the guy
at dinner.

Speaker 2 (34:59):
I should have.

Speaker 1 (34:59):
But he goes in to get the fork in the napkin,
and Cheryl's sitting there waiting to eat her dessert, you know, very.

Speaker 2 (35:06):
Pol likely he gives a thought to him taking a
fork in a napkin. Well story, no, no, no, no, no,
I'm saying you know, I'm talking about I'm not talking
about Cheryl him whatever. It's clearly revenge by the matre d.
So it's not like but who would ever give a
thought that this might lead to me being in court?

(35:27):
Right well, by the way, in all sincerity, I have
found that is the way life works. A lot of times,
something very little you think, oh, there's it's nothing cheating
the world, But you doing something that you think is
no big deal, and you're fucked again when I say go.

Speaker 1 (35:41):
Larry takes a fork and a napkin from an empty table,
puts it in his pocket, and he's about to walk
out to give Greg the Limo driver the fork nap
and Rick the maitre D.

Speaker 3 (35:50):
Stops him and asks us in his pocket.

Speaker 2 (35:54):
Oh hey, Larry, how's it going? Oh hey? The food
was sensational?

Speaker 4 (35:59):
Excellent, Yeah, really spectacular, wonderful.

Speaker 2 (36:02):
Do you mind tell me what you got in your pocket?
The pen I was thinking of the other pocket, Oh.

Speaker 4 (36:10):
I got a napkin and a fork, there's a driver outside.
Pardon me for suggesting this, but it seems like you
are walking out with our silverware.

Speaker 1 (36:20):
And you're walking out with our silverware. I call that stealing.
Makes a big cause. The leb about it, and Larry says,
I know what's going on here. You're upset with me
about the stop and chat, and Rick goes and calls
the police.

Speaker 2 (36:32):
Old on a couple things. First off, what we discover
in this scene as he has been watching Larry like
a hawk, so he knows that silverware and that napkin
is in his pocket, and he thinks, no matter what
the excuse is, I've got him right. And then also
how about him calmly saying, Uh, could you wait right there?
And then he walks over to the thing. Oh what

(36:54):
are you doing? I'm calling the police, But it's done
so calmly on his side.

Speaker 1 (36:59):
And then the cap comes and he gives him a summons,
and he tells him he's going to go before Judge Kats.
Yeah to you know, to deal with the summons. I
should have let the guy eat with his hands, Larry says.
And they go out to the driver and Larry never
brought the fork up because he got stopped by Rick,
and as they're getting in the car, you.

Speaker 2 (37:16):
Right, hold on. I love the way Tom Booker plays this,
even with the fork thing. Not quite an asshole because
you understand his frustration, but kind of an asshole. Then
when Larry comes, you can see his frustration with Larry.
Yet when they say, what do you know? I'll get
something on the way home, it's okay, But he's not aggressive,

(37:39):
but he's not throwing guilt his way. I don't feel okay.

Speaker 3 (37:42):
I felt that he was, well, you're wrong, but well I.

Speaker 2 (37:44):
Said that to me numerous times. I'm getting back at you.
I'm like the matre d. I'm getting back at you.

Speaker 3 (37:50):
Okay, I am taking your getting back at me.

Speaker 2 (37:52):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (37:53):
And then we see as they're getting in the.

Speaker 2 (37:54):
Car guilt by the way fact you're okay.

Speaker 1 (37:58):
Then as we see as they're getting in the cart,
you because you're staying at that hotel which was established
in the first scene, right walking out with the messeuse
who had been there to give you a massage, and I.

Speaker 3 (38:10):
Guarantee you a happy ending as well, oh without a doubt.

Speaker 1 (38:13):
And she has long red hair, and Cheryl notices right,
and Cheryl very slowly walks up to her and says,
do you have a tattoo of a star?

Speaker 2 (38:23):
But by the way, the way she approaches it, which is,
how do I sound not sound like a nutbag? But
I'm pretty sure what's going on? And this is gonna
sound so.

Speaker 3 (38:33):
Striking all in her face.

Speaker 2 (38:34):
But by the way, Larry wouldn't even say this is weird.
He would just go up and go do you have
a tattoo on your arm or whatever? Cheryl just massages it.
I don't know, I really think she's a.

Speaker 1 (38:45):
Great go ahead, and she's yes, I do have a
tattoo of a star?

Speaker 3 (38:50):
And then the messus sees.

Speaker 1 (38:51):
Larry and says, oh hi, Larry, and that's you wa
done with Cheryl.

Speaker 2 (38:56):
Although by the way that storyline has.

Speaker 1 (38:57):
Done, it's done I know, which I found a little
disc inserting because it's never resolved.

Speaker 2 (39:01):
But that was fine. And then we're at court with
Judge Cats and Larry. By the way, Judge Cats, you
look at him and you go, jew, yeah, he's not
like and Larry starts by saying and may I say,
oh my god, I and it's about to be a
weird white jacket all I guess that large jacket. It's

(39:22):
very much like the jacket, the Seinfeldt jacket, except in white,
the white cat white jacket. Court. No, no, but I
wanted to say I love the Jewish stuff. I mean
what I think some of the things that Larry does
that really hit me hard is any Jewish stuff to

(39:42):
help him get by.

Speaker 1 (39:44):
So so Larry starts to explain about the fork and
that the matre d had a personal enemis because he
didn't stop and chat, and the judge, who was terrific
by the way.

Speaker 2 (39:54):
Well done though, as Larry when he first starts, it
makes sense the first three sentences, he says, if you
only would have stopped, you know, if you only Bachelum's fine,
If he only would have stopped after three four sentences,
it would be fine. When he went into the whole
other stop and chat part of the whole thing. You
knew watching You Learn A dead man a dead man.

Speaker 4 (40:17):
What happened is simply that I was trying to bring
a fork to a workingman who was a driver, a
limousine driver, and he had dinner, but he did not
have a fork to eat the dinner. So all I
was doing was attempting to bring him a fork. And
a napkin so he wouldn't have to eat with his
hands and get it all over his face and his clothing.
And it was only out of some personal animus that

(40:40):
the restaurant tour had toward me, because I ranged him
on the street and I didn't stop and have a
little chat with him. You know, I don't like to
make little chit chat on the street. I like to
have a real conversation with people.

Speaker 1 (40:53):
And it's the judge goes into a whole big thing
about celebrity, and you think you have no consequences, and
you think you were a buffet all Larry's I could
work it off.

Speaker 3 (41:02):
I could work at the temple and the judgement.

Speaker 2 (41:07):
I want to say this, he'd already said to Larry
at this point, I can't find you because it means
nothing to you because you're rich, which, by the way,
is a thing that's rarely mentioned on the show, someone
saying he's rich, because I know he's not comfortable with that.
I'm sure he enjoys being rich, but he doesn't like
acknowledging it. But he says that, and he goes, what
do you think we could do to have you? You

(41:29):
know what punishment do you think that's why I could?

Speaker 3 (41:33):
And the justice isn't it a joy to work at
the test?

Speaker 2 (41:37):
And he says I could hand out yamakas. And and
by the way, yamaka is the little skull kept thing
that Jews wear, either in temple or on the street,
depending on your level of Jewishness. And a talis, which
I don't think I've ever seen on a jew wearing
on the street. Yeah, you see them hanging out of
the underneath. Yes, my mistake. But a talis is like

(42:00):
the scarf that Jews wear.

Speaker 1 (42:02):
Okay, Yeah, And then we don't know what the sentence is,
but we cut to seeing Larry standing outside wearing a
big sandwich.

Speaker 2 (42:10):
Well again, I'm digressing because I'm just remembering. At the
end of his spiel, he says I was giving it
to a driver, a working man, A.

Speaker 3 (42:20):
Working man, Yes, kill a working man.

Speaker 1 (42:22):
And we see Larry wearing the sandwich, boards saying I
steal forks from restaurants, and we cut to we see
that he's at the restaurant and from the w But
but it's but it's a network symposium.

Speaker 2 (42:36):
Networks, one by one, all the people.

Speaker 3 (42:39):
First, Alan Wasserman gets the toe.

Speaker 2 (42:42):
Oh, by the way, I missed terribly one of the
great talents and commons and gone much too young.

Speaker 1 (42:48):
And and then Larry says to him enjoying the shrimp,
to enjoy the shrimp.

Speaker 2 (42:51):
And then Lane Michaels from Maybe c.

Speaker 1 (42:54):
Gets out that was a water bottle of my pants.

Speaker 2 (42:57):
That's not his wife.

Speaker 3 (42:58):
Well, his wife was Rita, Yeah, but.

Speaker 2 (43:00):
We probably couldn't get her for that day, but could
have been associate. It could have been an associate. But
I got a vibe of stage going on.

Speaker 1 (43:07):
Okay, and Larry starts with me, that was a water
bottle in my pants. So we're revisiting everything that happened.

Speaker 2 (43:14):
But then he actually yells at him something insulting after
he's made his case and they're ignoring. Oh, why don't
you I forget what the cutdown was. Why don't you
tell people that you're the lame Lane Michaelson or whatever.

Speaker 1 (43:26):
And then the CBS people come out and then he's
it's a long story. I was helping a workingman again
with the workingman working man, and then we just see
him pacing back.

Speaker 3 (43:35):
And forth, and that's it. Yeah, I mean, it's a
great episode.

Speaker 2 (43:39):
Yeah, but because it's the finale, he has just killed
the CBS deal, that's course, and she mumbles and I
hear it in the mix, she mumbles like something I'll
never work with that guy or something something like that. Yeah,
by the way, that's a perfect moment for you know, the.

Speaker 1 (43:56):
And it was it was season two, but season one
didn't wrap up in quite the same way, so it
was the beginning of the wrap up.

Speaker 2 (44:04):
No, but it was the beginning of arcs right then
that episode, because the next season is an arc. So
that episode sort of set a tone for the way
the show is about.

Speaker 3 (44:15):
This season had somewhat of an arc with the Julius.

Speaker 2 (44:17):
But by the way, yes, we've had one episode that
I remember, which is my favorite all time episode, Wandering Bear,
where it's a self contained episode the reason before, but
we've not done it before or since we started doing
the storylines where there's a what.

Speaker 3 (44:34):
Was episode Palestinian Chicken was a standalone?

Speaker 2 (44:37):
What season was that? That was season in the picture?

Speaker 3 (44:41):
The season eight was the New York and you know
all of that.

Speaker 1 (44:44):
There were several you'll see as we move along in
several seasons, there's this, by the way, to stand alone.

Speaker 2 (44:49):
You know better than I do, and I'm not saying
that's arcas not wrong. No, by the way, you're almost
always right. Oh, I gotta tell this story before we go,
so it's fact. And I'm not exaggerating when I say
Larry and I have made at least thirty bets with
each other, and he's made some with Jeff Shaffer, because
Jeff Shaffer was there going I'm not touching that, meaning

(45:10):
I've never won a bet with Larry. No, no, no,
I have never won. Well, we're talking. I'm not gonna
say what we were talking about. But he said something that
I damn well knew was wrong, but having lost every
bet to him, Jeff and I laughed because he said
to Jeff, I'll bet you a thousand dollars. I want
none of it. And then he said to me, and
I go, no, I'm not betting you, but I know

(45:30):
I'm right, and I'll be by gone. I was right.
I was so right. Well by the way he wrote me, going,
it's too bad, Yes, you are right, it's too bad
you didn't make the bet. So I'm back to like,
oh and thirty with him. That one doesn't count. That's
an almost that's like being a golfer and losing by
a stroke. There you go, by the way. You know,

(45:53):
when I tell these things, you give me at my response,
what do you want me to say?

Speaker 3 (45:58):
Oh, that's fascinating, But.

Speaker 2 (46:00):
Feigning interest is just so insulting. You will look on
your face of like, all right, I'll put up with this.
We've done the show, where we've done the show. We
love each other, just know that, all right, Thank you.
The history of carm Your Enthusiasm is the production of

(46:21):
iHeart Radio. For more podcasts from iHeart Radio, visit

Speaker 1 (46:24):
The iHeart Radio Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to
your favorite shows.