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July 29, 2024 40 mins

Monday (pt 1 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, Robert Earl Keen has the perfect Monday morning song, “Swervin’ In My Lane.”.. - We’re turning our musical spotlight on to ‘Tater this morning - first up is “Delusional Girl”.. - We’ll listen in to Gary Busey as he dictates another entry into his diary.. - then sing along with “Tater’s Cans”.. and “Marci’s Chest” (hmm - I’m sensing a theme here..).. - Then on the backside we’ll check in on the big Summer Sale that’s underway at Tacky Jackie’s..

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Good morning, rolling to the big show on the radio. Hello,
this is Robert Goulay and you're listening to the pride
of the Red States, John Boyn Billy right here on
the Big show. Some enchanted morning. You may hear the
Big Show. Where's my big bag? Who can't be topical?

Speaker 2 (00:58):
No?

Speaker 3 (00:58):
No, oh, it is Monday morning, July the twenty nine,
and you got a big show on the radio.

Speaker 4 (01:08):
Let's have a wonderful work week here.

Speaker 5 (01:10):
Starting right now.

Speaker 3 (01:11):
Okay, okay, let's say is National Lausanna Day.

Speaker 5 (01:21):
You want to go ahead and plan you suffer. My
mom could make the best lasagna. That was our that
was our Christmas meal.

Speaker 6 (01:29):
Ooh it was so good.

Speaker 5 (01:31):
Ye never paid attention.

Speaker 3 (01:35):
I know you all didn't. National Chicken Wing Day, alright
he hey, I buzz at low Soo Taburn in South End, Shota,
North Carolina.

Speaker 7 (01:47):
And.

Speaker 5 (01:48):
Holy cow, they have amped up the heat, Ryan, Yeah
they were good.

Speaker 3 (01:56):
So inter National Lipstick Day. You know, for some women,
lipstick is the only make up requirement, whether the color
is sheer, light, dark or bright. Today is the day
for all kinds of lipstick.

Speaker 5 (02:11):
You should do a tiptop. I don't know, a little condescending.

Speaker 3 (02:18):
Got note that's just hell nee the tat wi red
up and put some red on them lips, I.

Speaker 5 (02:25):
Try some, don't even use lipstick. You looking at me for.

Speaker 8 (02:33):
All?

Speaker 2 (02:34):
Right?

Speaker 3 (02:34):
Then, well we got three days and this are saved up.
Those will be where we get our categories. You know
the way we do, first thing in the morning, playing outbursts.

Speaker 5 (02:42):
We're awake. Big shows on a radio. Good morning, Big
shows on a radio.

Speaker 3 (02:49):
First prize pack today a hat, t shirt, a tumbler
and a twenty five dollars gas card from Law Tigers
motorcycle lawyers who ride. Law Tiger's representing it injured riders
for over two decades. With Lord Tigers, you never ride alone.
Just click on their banner to Big Show dot com.
Get all the foud Listen upright. Here'll give you three

(03:10):
dates in history where we get our categories. To start
with nineteen fourteen, the transcontinental telephone service began with the
first telephone conversation between New York and San Francisco.

Speaker 9 (03:23):
What can you hear me now?

Speaker 5 (03:27):
They were the fight Rado.

Speaker 3 (03:29):
Thank you.

Speaker 5 (03:32):
All O seven.

Speaker 3 (03:34):
Cal Ripkin Junior and Tony Gwynn were inducted into the
National Baseball Hall of Fame and the ceremony attended by
record smashing crowd of more than seventy five thousand. Of course,
where the Hall of Fame is Cooperstown, New York.

Speaker 10 (03:48):
There are only two people in the Baseball Hall of
Fame who never had anything to do with baseball, never
played a game, never coached now and they are who
Abbott and Costella for who who's.

Speaker 5 (04:00):
On first bit?

Speaker 8 (04:01):
Right?

Speaker 5 (04:02):
Also?

Speaker 3 (04:02):
All right, well that's uh finally on this date in
twenty twelve, they would talk about Snoop Dog on Friday
with Sorensen.

Speaker 5 (04:10):
Well.

Speaker 3 (04:11):
He was banned from Norway for two years after he
was caught trying to bring a small amount of pot
into the country.

Speaker 5 (04:17):
In June.

Speaker 3 (04:18):
His lawyer stated that Snoop would just live with the
band and had no plans to appeal.

Speaker 5 (04:24):
I don't need to go to Norway's.

Speaker 7 (04:27):
There.

Speaker 3 (04:27):
It is our three categories one eight hundred Big Shows
you told free Line, come on play out birds next.

Speaker 4 (04:57):
Seven It's a big showing the radio relative you.

Speaker 3 (05:00):
One day, July twenty ninth, Today's featured track from the
Big Shows mid Box The Crocodile Stalkers, Child Development Center,
Social Words Child Center.

Speaker 4 (05:10):
That mid Box at the Bigshow dot Com.

Speaker 8 (05:15):
Next game of weeks the.

Speaker 2 (05:16):
Ones up person. Let's play Upburst. It's the game that
anyone can win, John Boy and Billy. He gave the
prizes from the Big Prize being.

Speaker 5 (05:29):
Let's go. He contested number one.

Speaker 2 (05:32):
This should really be a lot of fun. Win you're
playing Upburst, have a hurry up and guess time you
love the best time you love a big shots.

Speaker 3 (05:44):
Let's say, hey the Jeffrey from Pensacola, Florida.

Speaker 9 (05:50):
We have shots.

Speaker 3 (05:58):
You want a Jeffrey, Good morning, Hey body, welcome.

Speaker 5 (06:04):
Oh, thank you, love you guys show, Thank you, buddy.
We're glad you made it in here.

Speaker 3 (06:08):
Jeffy, Let's see if you can get through the three categories.
Send you one of these nice prize packages. All right
in five seconds. Three ways you can have a conversation.

Speaker 10 (06:20):
Ready, go.

Speaker 11 (06:23):
Telephone, in person, text and if it's your wife with yourself.

Speaker 4 (06:30):
Jeffy, gott to have a little humor.

Speaker 5 (06:32):
Have some troubles at home out of town this weekend,
h Jeffy.

Speaker 3 (06:37):
Now specifically here we need three players in the Baseball
Hall of Fame.

Speaker 11 (06:42):
Ready, go, ty Cop, Carl Ripkin, bab Ruth. Once you
got it all right, Jeffrey for the win. Three places.

Speaker 5 (06:54):
Recreational marijuana is legal. Ready to go, Canada, Ecuador in Colorado. Ah,
thank you, right on, all right, Jeffrey, big on y'all.

Speaker 4 (07:11):
Tiger's passed back, headed down to Pensacola for you awesome sauce.

Speaker 3 (07:17):
Alright, Jeffy, hang on with jacket, all right, thank you,
all right, let's jump out, catch you up on what
went on around you overnight. They're ripping up cane on
Monday morning, swerving in the lanes.

Speaker 4 (07:38):
Hog, Good morning. It's a big show on the radio.

Speaker 3 (08:16):
Got your old treat this Monday morning, they say, Marcy
and Music Monday.

Speaker 4 (08:23):
Well, yeah, we'll get it going first.

Speaker 3 (08:26):
I Monday Morning's song Robert ur Keine sing along that's.

Speaker 5 (08:31):
Done by Robert Earl Keane is being lying in the
Big Shoe stdio.

Speaker 12 (08:35):
Sometimes I don't know what I'm doing.

Speaker 5 (08:40):
Come on, Jack and get ready to say anybody.

Speaker 12 (08:42):
Sometimes on my days are filled with round.

Speaker 5 (08:49):
That's I traveled down left.

Speaker 13 (08:52):
Our bad things ain't going my way because there's always
someone swirming in my life.

Speaker 5 (09:04):
You keep swerving in my life and it's causing.

Speaker 13 (09:09):
Lots of thanger.

Speaker 5 (09:11):
I'm a honking on my horror. I'm shooting you the fling.

Speaker 13 (09:19):
Keep switching on my bride lights just to him turn
when you're swerving all lives pie way, you're running someone
off the ride.

Speaker 5 (09:35):
The day Joe, Why I thought I never.

Speaker 12 (09:41):
Never could love another? How else could I feed? But
now and you run into me. I can't believe I
could not see her. I'll take up no one's at

(10:02):
the waiting.

Speaker 13 (10:04):
You keep swarming in my life, just causing lots of bab.

Speaker 5 (10:12):
I'm cussing out your name. I'm shooting you the fight.

Speaker 13 (10:19):
I keep switching on my bride lights, but you're just
too dimpty. Now when you're swerving all lights how by
you're running someone off the road.

Speaker 3 (10:41):
Driving a big show. Good morning, it's a big show

(11:10):
on the radio and action.

Speaker 14 (11:14):
Hello friends, you're old pal Burtburn here with another tonsil
twizzling episode of John Boy and Billy Playhouse. Today's episode
Operation Examination. As our story opens, a sexy young blonde
is lying on a gurney outside the operating room, about
to go into surgery. All right, sweetie, you stay here
and the doctor will be along shortly to check on
you before your procedure.

Speaker 5 (11:36):
Okay, thanks, I hope it doesn't take much longer. I'm
so nervous. You know I'm naked under here.

Speaker 14 (11:41):
You know, I know you'll be here in the jeff
sit tight snow white. A man in a white coat
approaches the patient.

Speaker 5 (11:48):
There you are, let me just pull back the sheet
and check things out here. He pulls back the sheet
and examines her. Your hands are cold. Okay, everything looks fantastic.
Are we going to surgery now? Probably? As the man leaves,
another gentleman in a white coat steps up. Ah, hello,

(12:10):
let's just have a quick look. See here. The man
pulls back the sheet and gives her an examination. Okay, well,
everything looks tipped top. Are we going into surgery now? Shortly?
Because I'm cold?

Speaker 2 (12:23):
Yeah?

Speaker 5 (12:23):
I could see that now, if you'll excuse me.

Speaker 14 (12:27):
A moment later, another man in a white coat arrives. Well,
I've heard a lot about you. Let's take a look here.

Speaker 5 (12:34):
When am I having the surgery? All these examinations are
they really necessary?

Speaker 14 (12:39):
I have no idea. We're just here to paint the ceiling.
We hope you've enjoyed John Boy and Billie Playhouse.

Speaker 5 (12:55):
Stay bored. The guy from flooring want to take a pet.

Speaker 14 (12:58):
Tune in next time, when we'll are these slightly drunk anesthesiologists.

Speaker 4 (13:02):
Saying, hey, big man, let me hold a dollar.

Speaker 5 (13:09):
Good morning, there's a big Yonder radio.

Speaker 9 (13:12):
Hell are you Lindsay premise here and when I'm on
this side of the pond, I get my daily dose
of culture and edification every morning from these two delightful lads,
John Boy and Billy right.

Speaker 5 (13:23):
Here on the big Show.

Speaker 9 (13:24):
You know, I hate to break it to you, boys,
but where I come from, you're all Yankees. Who will
I thought it was funny.

Speaker 5 (14:07):
Good morning.

Speaker 3 (14:08):
It's a big show on the radio featuring Tato talents
all morning long with our Marcy Music Monday.

Speaker 4 (14:22):
Tata's got a dumb laugh and her hair is a mess.

Speaker 5 (14:26):
But she's busty.

Speaker 6 (14:30):
She's fine sometimes, but her real success is she's busty.

Speaker 5 (14:37):
She's lousy in accents.

Speaker 6 (14:39):
I can't tell a joke when it's all on the line.
She'll use heally joke. If she does something right, you
about have a stroke.

Speaker 3 (14:48):
But she's busty.

Speaker 6 (14:55):
Yeah, shit falls in the water, she'll probably drown because
she's busty. Eats one of those things weigh sixty five pounds.

Speaker 5 (15:06):
Yes, she's busting.

Speaker 4 (15:10):
That giant wreck.

Speaker 6 (15:11):
Really isn't good luck wear? Each of her bras costs
one hundred bucks.

Speaker 5 (15:17):
Gets chamber and to over around in.

Speaker 4 (15:19):
A trunk because she's busting.

Speaker 6 (15:28):
She gets lots of fan mail from guys in the
clink because she's busting.

Speaker 5 (15:35):
And dirty of man wanna buy her and drink because
she's busting.

Speaker 14 (15:42):
Wherever she goes, she leaves a man off her baby
as well.

Speaker 6 (15:47):
Have to drink milk through a straw if they don't
have to dislocate that chalk because she's busting.

Speaker 5 (15:56):
Here's top heavy smogling watermelons. They have some wards. One's
looking at me and the other ones looking at the wall.
That's odd.

Speaker 3 (16:20):
Good morning, got a big show on the radio. All right,
do we get ready to play one for you on
our Marsie Music Monday. The uh it's about aoc. I
can't remember the title.

Speaker 5 (16:30):
Of it though, Delusional girl, delusional girl.

Speaker 3 (16:33):
That's it.

Speaker 4 (16:34):
You got her down.

Speaker 5 (16:35):
Now you gonna have to start working on your Kamala.

Speaker 9 (16:37):
You know that.

Speaker 5 (16:39):
That's a good start. Alright, I go, We'll go play
that's all for it?

Speaker 3 (16:42):
Just the second first you can win on John boyd
Jeopardy A waffle house prize pack cool waffle House swag
for you. We're celebrating waffle House adding another thousand locations nationwide,
and they need high energy leaders who make it happen.
You can get great pay and full benefits. Apply online
at waffle House dot com slash Careers. Click the banner
when you hit the Big Show dot com. I hang

(17:05):
onna play for minutes right now, let's do it.

Speaker 15 (17:26):
Beggie ladies, my class fare Now I'm ast big shot congress.
How I game this far? Comies love me? Come there here.

Speaker 16 (17:45):
I just don't see.

Speaker 5 (17:48):
That I'm a cool list.

Speaker 16 (17:49):
Do this come just as meution over?

Speaker 17 (18:01):
You know that they are in the world telling you
a delusion, lots of plans to see the world we
see two wis now.

Speaker 15 (18:22):
Really compresss ban sas trains, no mo forty cows.

Speaker 5 (18:29):
No more borders out.

Speaker 16 (18:31):
Contest so skills. I don't know how we'll be for
sounds good to the.

Speaker 18 (18:41):
Schools because they are in the elutional world, dying a
delusion over and you know that they are in the
world and dying a.

Speaker 19 (18:55):
Delusional thing in ALUs world bathing as bad thing again, losing.

Speaker 16 (19:16):
Worldsptions is really we.

Speaker 17 (19:22):
Tell but olstics will make me the friends can tell
because we are there rock in a revolution something in
my delusion other and you know that we are dead
prop in the lusion world.

Speaker 5 (19:42):
And I'm just a delusion of the.

Speaker 18 (19:46):
Rock in a delusion something, my delusion of the world.

Speaker 16 (19:54):
In a delusion world and nothing, a delusion of the
again again the world.

Speaker 19 (20:19):
Again the world, they again not the lusion world. They
again not the world. They again nothing world.

Speaker 3 (20:39):
I saw a time of detainer right there. Oh, let's
play John Boy Jeopardy. Years after this well known TV
sitcom went off the air, the show's creator revealed that
he had modeled each of its main characters after one
of these seven deadly sins.

Speaker 5 (20:59):
What is the Walton's John Boy?

Speaker 3 (21:05):
But this is kind of weird too, of looking at
the answer, Well, what y'all got one eight hundred Big
Show you told free line across America. Come on, we
played John boyd Jeopardy next, Good morning, that's a big

(21:39):
Shaw on the radio Rover until your Monday, July twenty ninth,
Not today's featuring track from the Big Show, bit Box,
The Crocodile Stalkers, Child Development Center, Church with Words, Child
Center hit the Big Box at the Big show dot com.

Speaker 4 (21:55):
Right now, let's play and.

Speaker 5 (21:57):
Yes live across America.

Speaker 1 (22:00):
It's John Bigema and now a man who says he
olds a lot to the time that he spent at
summer camp during his youth.

Speaker 5 (22:08):
So from all of us, thank you Camp walk.

Speaker 16 (22:11):
A walk a walk out.

Speaker 5 (22:13):
He's John Boy, as.

Speaker 3 (22:17):
I headed Jeff out of Maiden, North Carolina. Good morning, Jeff,
Good morning. Hey Brdy, you got the first shot at
John Boy Jeopardy right here, Jeff, let's throw it out there.

Speaker 4 (22:28):
It was years after this well.

Speaker 3 (22:30):
Known TV sitcom went off the air, the show's creator
revealed he had modeled each of its main characters after
one of these seven deadly sins.

Speaker 5 (22:41):
What have you thinking about, Tracy? I mean, Jeff, I
was thinking about married with children?

Speaker 4 (22:49):
Married with children? Well, let's see.

Speaker 3 (22:57):
Al peg the two neighbors, Bud, yeah, six, the two
neighbors seven.

Speaker 5 (23:06):
Yeah, okay, but I think I think but still wrong.
Bundy had all seven covered. Kelly, her name is Kelly.

Speaker 14 (23:16):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (23:18):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (23:18):
We appreciate you playing, Buddy. You almost got it about
talking me into it. You have a great rest of
your day, Buddy, You're too all right, Jeff. Let's go
with the Avenue hears Tracey is down in Greenville, South Carolina.

Speaker 5 (23:33):
So Tracy, now you get a shot out of good morning.

Speaker 4 (23:35):
Buddy, good morning, first time, all right, welcome in here,
all right?

Speaker 3 (23:41):
Not married with children, but this one you had to
think about? What show you thinking about? Well, with seven characters,
I was thinking Gilligan, you're thinking Gilligan's Island. Well, let's
see if you're right.

Speaker 5 (23:57):
Yes, you are.

Speaker 8 (24:00):
Sold.

Speaker 5 (24:01):
And I don't believe he.

Speaker 10 (24:02):
Gets a google that because obviously he's on the back
of a galloping horse right now.

Speaker 5 (24:09):
So are we got to know about it?

Speaker 3 (24:11):
The professor due to his intelligence and self reliance, that
is pride. Pride was a professor. Greed was Thurston Howl.
The third Wrath was the skipper, short tempered, tendency to
get angry, doop. Envy was Mary Ann, the simple girl
who enved Ginger's glamour, and then Ginger was lust the

(24:37):
glamorous movies on. Okay, Gluttney was Lovey Howell for food,
but for access and indulgence, I said. And finally, Gilligan,
what was Gilligan? Seven deadly sins, sloth, laziness, and frequent

(24:59):
misdakes and hang around in that tree eating fruit. Hey,
we're good work. Are we learning something about Gilligan's Island?
I thought I'd learned everything there was to know. And Tracy,
you got a big old waffle house price back head
down to Greenville for you.

Speaker 5 (25:15):
Thank you so much. Man, you got a buddy.

Speaker 4 (25:17):
Hang on.

Speaker 5 (25:24):
All right, We're gonna jump out and catch you up
on you and you right on the other side of
our time, Capsilver. This jult of twenty nine Monday Morning
Live coming up.

Speaker 3 (26:02):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one exports.

Speaker 8 (26:17):
Hey, beggan gaydar, that's right. It is I, the seeker
of the sissy, the pursuer of the pansy, the falconer
of the fairies, keeping America great by keeping it straight,
protecting our future by outing boy smoochers, protecting the flag

(26:39):
by stopping the stopping the dank nabbit. For the lofe
of me, I can't think of anything to rise with flag,
no go.

Speaker 5 (26:47):
I hate when that happens.

Speaker 8 (26:48):
Yeah, well, I ain't quite the word smith. You and
Bidley are so what's up?

Speaker 4 (26:53):
Host Magan Radio Magic as usual? What you been doing?

Speaker 8 (26:57):
Didn't you just listen to my dang introductions. I thought
it was pretty clear. You mean runs through it again
in case you miss something.

Speaker 5 (27:03):
No, that's not necessary. Let's just get this over with.

Speaker 8 (27:06):
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Well, I'm sorry there are sugar brenches.
Is this a bad time? Land's sake? Sounds like somebody's
got a case of the gay day.

Speaker 3 (27:19):
That's not that, It's just that I know what's coming
every time you call. It's the same thing. You accuse
all the people I hang out with of being gay.

Speaker 8 (27:27):
Well, that's kind of my bag. No, pun in doesn't.
Now if you prefer, I can talk about how I
hate leaf blowers or working women or not kept it
in restaurants, or how Obama is our savior.

Speaker 5 (27:42):
No, we got a guy already does that.

Speaker 8 (27:44):
Yeah, right, And I don't hear you busting his wrinkly
old hum for covering the same thing over and over.
So I'm like a little professional courtesy extended my way.

Speaker 5 (27:51):
I'm sorry.

Speaker 8 (27:52):
I meant having a wide world of wedgies. Do you
even know what I'm gonna talk about? Ever occur to
you that you just might be wrong?

Speaker 5 (28:00):
I just want to jump the gun.

Speaker 8 (28:02):
He speaking of guns. Lately, I've been pondering your recent
infatuation with your fruity little hunting buddy.

Speaker 4 (28:07):
Why you don't mean no mausey old boys.

Speaker 8 (28:10):
Do you? Well, I wasn't gonna start there.

Speaker 4 (28:13):
Since you brought it up, you cannot be serious?

Speaker 8 (28:16):
You that gun? Right? I'm serious. Hey, I'm sorry. But
with names like Cuz and Yuck and Doggy, there's something
fishy going on. You throw into regulars like Captain Kitty
Cat Pokey from the Mountains and little bitty Cobby Bunny,
and you got yourself to touring company at deliver us
right there.

Speaker 5 (28:36):
That's ridiculous.

Speaker 8 (28:37):
Really, Well, I tell you what's ridiculous. The way you
talk about him on the radio. You ever listen to yourself?
You sound like a schoolgirl swooning over the star quarterback.
Oh cuz you're so rugged. Will you take me to
the dance?

Speaker 4 (28:52):
You di'd crazy. I don't swoon over and I never
asked cousin.

Speaker 5 (28:56):
Take me to the dance.

Speaker 8 (28:57):
Well, let me ask you this. Did he ask you
ask me? Hell? Can you blame me with your bad attitude?
No offense, but you can be a bit of a bitch.

Speaker 5 (29:07):
You got this all wrong.

Speaker 3 (29:08):
They listened to the show, heard I was a hunter
and they invited me to a turkey hunt for the
TV show.

Speaker 8 (29:13):
Well, there's your first clue, Sherlock Homo. They're TV folk.
You and I both know TV chuck full of operators.
You wind up going for the turkey and staying for
the gobble gobble. Can I get a whip?

Speaker 5 (29:28):
It wasn't like that at all.

Speaker 4 (29:30):
They made me a turkey thug.

Speaker 8 (29:32):
A turkey thug. Well, liney, now is that with you?
Backwoods booty burglars? Call yourself to make you sound tough?
Turkey thug? That sounds like the world's worst inter city game. Hey,
I couldn't make the crimson blood, but I'm a turkey thug. Hell,

(29:54):
couldn't you be a dear destroyer or a or a
moose smaller or hell even an elk liminator. Turkey thug?
Ain't that sweet? That's right up there with chicken choker
for corny?

Speaker 5 (30:07):
Are you even know what thug stands for?

Speaker 8 (30:10):
Huh? Temperamental homos uniting for gainess.

Speaker 5 (30:15):
So let me get this straight.

Speaker 8 (30:16):
It'd be nice for a change.

Speaker 5 (30:17):
You're saying to call these guys I go hunt with
her gay?

Speaker 8 (30:21):
Well, I will say, it's hard to tell sometimes my
gay detecting powers can sometimes be thwarted. Really well, how
when you're all dressing homo.

Speaker 5 (30:32):
Flaws, I think we're about done here.

Speaker 8 (30:34):
Suit yourself. I'm just trying to watch your back and
not in the way you're hunting. But let me just say,
if they ever invite you bear hunting, just make sure
they're talking about the animal and not the clothing. Optional, Shine,
just some food for thalt and maybe you need to
go back for seconds where.

Speaker 11 (30:55):
Jun Boy and Billy, No, we're not homosexual, but we
are willing to learn.

Speaker 3 (31:00):
Yeah, would they say us someplace special?

Speaker 5 (31:02):
Good morning radio?

Speaker 3 (31:04):
Done right, good Monday morning, big shows on the radio. Well,

(31:35):
there's always something exciting happening in little Dismal seep in
South Carolina. Here to tell us all about it, as
a mayor himself, the Honorable Merwin Q. Fiddleswoop. Good morning,
mister mayor. Good morning John Boy and all your wonderful listeners.

Speaker 5 (31:50):
So what's coming up in Dismal Seepage. I thought you'd
never asked, John Boy.

Speaker 14 (31:57):
A little known fact about our town is that we
are the dairy capital of the state, mostly thanks to
text nutters wonder utters dairy. Well, I did not know
that way to do your homework. Beab So as a
tip of the old Fedorida texts and his wife Edna.
We're throwing the first annual Dismal Seepach Saint Cheese Festival.

(32:18):
Cheese festival sounds good, so glad you approve. So to
kick things off, we'll have our big parade down Main Street.
We'll have the marching band from the Brie Larsen School
of Dairy Fermentation.

Speaker 5 (32:30):
Now, what are they called?

Speaker 14 (32:31):
Harmonious teats? All dressed in white, playing bagpipes that look
like teats. You've seen them, just guessing you should see
their mascot, Ulysses s Utter. It's a great big utter
with googly eyes and a crazy smile. Sounds cute, terrifying. Also,

(32:55):
the Shriners will be on hand, John Boy. Half of
them will look like wedges of cheese and the other
half like mice. It sounds adorable, but I've seen the
rehearsal and there's a whole mad max vibe to it.

Speaker 5 (33:08):
How's the rest of the weekend in shaping up?

Speaker 14 (33:10):
That didn't sound red at all, John Blake, Well, We've
got plenty of fun in store for folks of all ages.
Direct from japan renowned sculptor Mitsu Rikawa will be here.
He's done a sixty foot sculpture made entirely of cheese,
marking the seventieth anniversary of his country's most famous monster.

(33:31):
You won't want to miss seeing Gorgonzilla.

Speaker 5 (33:36):
Godzilla made out of gorgonzola.

Speaker 14 (33:39):
Check out The Big Brain on John Blay. If you
consider yourself the daring type, you might want to play
cheddar Roulette. All right, now, what's that exactly? Contestants will
sit around a table sampling chedters from all over the world,
but a few are rancid, and the last person not
iarfing their guts out is the winner. Sponsored by Doctor

(34:00):
Barry Atrix belly bands entire recyclists. Couldn't you get sued
for something like that? And if that didn't do enough,
you would wet your appetite belly after the trough for
our Big Cheese Eating Contest sponsored by Admiral Klott's Colandi
Clogger and Farmland Fertilizer. Eating too much cheese and good
for you? Everyone will want to stop. Everyone will want

(34:23):
to stop and see cheese Louise. She has tattoos of
every single kind of cheese all over her body. That
sounds interesting.

Speaker 5 (34:32):
I don't think she thought a lot of it through.

Speaker 14 (34:35):
I mean, if you are tattooed cottage cheese on your thighs,
you're just asking for trauma.

Speaker 5 (34:40):
This guy knows what I'm talking about. You should see
where she tattooed the Limburger.

Speaker 14 (34:45):
Where we're hoping to set a world record this weekend
as Scabby Knuckles tries to set the record for cheese grating.

Speaker 4 (34:54):
Sounds great.

Speaker 5 (34:56):
You always have some clever aside, don't you. Yeah, we'll
watch it. We'll have several.

Speaker 14 (35:03):
Vendors on hand to satisfy all your cheesy needs. Now,
if you think you can't afford some of the more
exotic brands, you'll be pleased to know that Jesus Priced
will be here to make your dreams come true.

Speaker 4 (35:16):
It's a miracle.

Speaker 14 (35:19):
Saturday night, you can't miss the concert. Little Miss Muffett
and her Kurds and Way Orchestra will be performing, and
our headliner is for the younger crowd with an appearance
by Scream Cheese and the Bloody Bagels, and back by
popular demand will be the Curdled Girdle Dancers.

Speaker 5 (35:36):
Haven't heard of them?

Speaker 14 (35:37):
Oh, they're plus sized artists dressed in skimpy milk made outfits,
everything all pushed up and up. You think it's hot,
now just wait till they do their thing. Well, I
guess your wife knows all about this, So come on
down Big Dismal seepach Set Cheese Festival this weekend. We're
cutting ticket prices in half so you don't have to

(35:59):
cut the cheese.

Speaker 5 (36:00):
Not your best work. Shut up.

Speaker 16 (36:05):
Yet.

Speaker 5 (36:06):
Morning, a big show is on your radio.

Speaker 7 (36:08):
I'll tell you I've never seen anything like it in
my life. The sun's belly up. There's food everywhere flying
through the air, round plates and bullets and hands. People
eat them with their fingers, their feet, other people's feet.

Speaker 5 (36:18):
It's unbelievable.

Speaker 7 (36:20):
OHI with the spreads, you can't imagine ribs and chickens
and biscuits and whole pigs and a great big stick.

Speaker 5 (36:25):
That's what it's like at the John Boy of Bully
Pig Show. It's a buffet from start to finish. There
should be a cover charge.

Speaker 20 (36:30):
I'll tell you.

Speaker 7 (36:31):
The only thing missing napkins. I guess that's what your
shirt is for. Or you fainted like cleaning bill over
my head.

Speaker 5 (36:37):
You gonna eat that.

Speaker 4 (37:10):
Good Monday Morning, appreciate you the big show.

Speaker 3 (37:14):
Right down the radio lists you're listening to the John
o'billy Late Risers podcast. There's that as well. You gonna
learn about that. Subscribe to us with a free iHeartRadio app.
Let you know when it's ready to go. Every Monday
through Friday after the broadcast is for you. Okay, And
this morning is a Marcie Music Monday.

Speaker 20 (37:44):
So big Soul round Marcy's cans won't fit in Onrey
the Giant's hands.

Speaker 5 (37:54):
Thankful that she's.

Speaker 20 (37:56):
Not a lesbian, So big so round Barsi's cans, Barsi's cans,
Old Barsi's cans. Oh, how they fascinate. They are so
spectacular of that, there's no debate. They must be a

(38:16):
heavy load to have to lug around. But she's lucky
she can charge by the power. So big, so round
the Barsi's cans won't fit in on Pray the Giant's hands.
Bankfoe that she's not lesbian, So big, so round Barci's cans.

(38:46):
When she goes out to the mall, the fellas have
to peak. She has got that sweater meat that manly
metal seek. When she plays trip poker, her losses are
quite rare. She wins every single hand win Just up there,

(39:07):
So big, so round Barcie's canser won't fit in Andre
the Giant's hands. Thank fool that she's not Lesbiana, So big,
so round Barcie's cans.

Speaker 5 (39:27):
Her boyfriend is a lucky man.

Speaker 20 (39:30):
Nobody can deny if you wear safety goggles so they
don't poke out his eye the first time that he
saw them. I'm sure he was in alle I bet
he didn't know he'd have to unhinge his jaw. So big,
so round Barsi's cans won't fit in Andrey the Giant's hands.

(39:59):
Thankful that she's not a lesbian so big and so
around Marcy's cans
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