May 12, 2025 • 44 mins
Monday (pt 2 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, it’s a Married Man Monday!.. - Rev. Billy Ray attacks working mothers and then offers them a place to stick their kiddies during summer vacation.. - Plus we’ve got Gary Busey, the Playhouse, Tarmac the Magnificent and Oliver!…
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:24):
Did you said me?
Speaker 2 (00:27):
No?
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Eleven days? Okay, it's just a big show on the
radio for your Monday Mage twelve.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
Then jump on in.
Speaker 4 (00:36):
Here and play our games. Marcy Marcia, he got the tools,
got the talent. Say they're in her place and now
does meet the contestants from Beautiful Cachet, Oklahoma.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
It's Roger.
Speaker 5 (00:56):
Hey, Roger, good morning, Hey on there.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Body way are all somehows have a tang? And oh Goohama?
Speaker 6 (01:09):
Order?
Speaker 1 (01:14):
Do you agree or disagree?
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (01:17):
Roger will get you two bills for two buzzers. That's
your gold win, the big old haven't heard prize pack.
So get in tune with Tater.
Speaker 7 (01:25):
Ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
I'm all right.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Which US states has the highest percentage of people who
walk to work?
Speaker 6 (01:39):
State? States? The state of depression.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
That's what it is, depressed, coach. You don't have a car,
have a car? Oh no, no, think this out.
Speaker 6 (01:48):
Okay, let me think, Let me think, Let me think.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Who is gotest of US states?
Speaker 6 (01:54):
Yeah? Yeah, you to choose from I say Massachusetts.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
Any particular reason.
Speaker 6 (01:59):
It's a big eight, okay, Scot Boston in.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
It, Roger. The percentages, I don't know you're gonna play them.
Do you agree or disagree? She got some unknown information
on this one. Massachusetts has abate, pretty big place. But
I'm gonna disagree on this. Okay, Well that was the
thing to do. Yeah, it was Alaska, Alaska. They walked
(02:25):
a word weird cold there, very good? Yeah, alright, there's
a bell for rides.
Speaker 6 (02:33):
I see Russia from my house.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
One more. Okay, you're good with it today. Tombstone serve
to identify the deceased, but they were originally created to
prevent something awful from happening.
Speaker 6 (02:48):
What was it from forgetting where you buried him?
Speaker 1 (02:52):
That would be awful.
Speaker 7 (02:55):
No, you don't like that one. No, I saw this
in a movie. It's to keep animals them diging, them
dig up.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
The toombstones were originally prevented to prevent animals from digging
up the graves. Pretty awful, Roger, agree or disagree? I
tell you what, I'm gonna gree on that one. That's
what that sounds good to tell you on that one. No, God, No,
So the dead couldn't escape, isn't that crazy?
Speaker 8 (03:26):
Well, personally I kind of want them to.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
So are you saying you researched this raady. I'm sure
I know it's true. So the dead, they thought the
dead might escape.
Speaker 8 (03:38):
There was a whole bunch of weird things going on
in the graveyards at that time. People were literally getting
buried alive a lot.
Speaker 6 (03:45):
So wouldn't you want them to escape?
Speaker 8 (03:47):
Well, you would think that, but you know so, I
mean they dug some caskets from that time period and
you can see claw marks on the inside.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
That's awful. That's why they put a bell on the
foot around.
Speaker 8 (04:00):
Some people who had money could hire and buy a
bell that would be you know, mounted above the grave
and the string would go down to the casket.
Speaker 6 (04:10):
And pay for the graveyard shift.
Speaker 8 (04:12):
That's what the graveyard shift was for people.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
Just yep, wow, all right, doesn't learn something?
Speaker 6 (04:20):
I really thought it was animals from digging them up.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
So, uh, let me say, Roger, what did you do wrong?
Speaker 6 (04:29):
So he agreed, agreed with the right.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
So there's that buzzer all right here it is on
the full cow. All right, Tayter, You've seen it on
TV a thousand times, But do the police really outline
a murder victim's body with chalk or tape?
Speaker 6 (04:45):
This This this contest took a turn didn't. Yeah, they
still do it, but they do it with silly strengths.
They don't do that anymore.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
No, they do not do that, Roger, Do you agree
or disagree?
Speaker 9 (05:06):
I'm gonna say, if you die and they give you
a pretty frame to be outlined in, I must say
that fault.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
I don't think they do.
Speaker 10 (05:11):
It no more.
Speaker 9 (05:12):
Can't agree.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
So he agrees and entators said no, and that was
that's the way to win the game, Roger. All right,
Mater five cops stopped doing that decades ago after they
figured out that it contaminated crime scenes. All right, there it.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
Is, Rogers.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Wait to go, buddy, big old prize pack. We'll get
to you out your pad in Oklahoma. Man, I appreciate that, y'all.
Take care, ah, Roger, Man, that's wild about people getting
buried alive that much.
Speaker 8 (05:50):
But you know, the funeral home industry really changed the
name of one of the rooms in your house.
Speaker 9 (05:55):
You know.
Speaker 8 (05:56):
They when someone died in the family, they used to
hold the servant is and they keep the dead body
in the house. Generally they would keep it in the parlor,
but the funeral industry came in and changed that. They
they built this place for them to go instead, and
they would, you know, go in and solicit the people
of the deceased family and say, you don't want to
(06:17):
keep your you know, your dead person here. You you know,
let's not make your parlor a room of the dead.
Make it a living space. And that's why we today
call it the living room.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Would you get that?
Speaker 9 (06:32):
That's helpful? Andy?
Speaker 6 (06:35):
Well, thanks, it's just story there for a little while.
What do you think, John boy?
Speaker 5 (06:41):
I believe it's true.
Speaker 11 (06:53):
M h.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Good morning. That's a big show on the radio, My
married Man Monday. One of the guy is thinking about it,
requests coming in for this this tune, the jazz married
man theme song.
Speaker 12 (07:37):
It married man, married man drives around in a minivan,
(08:18):
got a wife, andsome kids, his whole e songs.
Speaker 3 (08:22):
Kids.
Speaker 13 (08:22):
Hey, there there goes a married man. How's he field listened?
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Dude?
Speaker 11 (08:30):
This poor guy's really screwed, hanging on by a thread,
quarter milk, loaf of bread.
Speaker 13 (08:38):
Hey, fred, ain't that the married man.
Speaker 11 (08:43):
Gotta big gas. Girl buys his clothes at the gap
and he's just about had love of this craft married man,
married man, friendly neighborhood married man. When he's whole, he's ignored.
Maybe that's why he's so bored.
Speaker 10 (09:03):
O Lord, it's hard for a married man.
Speaker 11 (09:39):
You work hard every day till the day that he's dead.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
He wants crying marry you.
Speaker 9 (09:47):
He'll just squeeze on your head.
Speaker 11 (09:50):
Married man, married man, friendly neighborhood, married man. Life for
him has no sing wife won't let him do the
things she says.
Speaker 1 (10:02):
It's about time.
Speaker 11 (10:04):
He grows up, weary of the scowl up.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
You fine married.
Speaker 14 (10:18):
Man, Good morning, make shows on the radio, Turn it up.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
And now an entry into the diary of Gary Busey.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
Dear Diary, this is Gary Beauty.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
Well Diary.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
I'm just checking in to gloat on another incredible, amazing, fantastical,
inspirational beauty accomplishment. No, I didn't get another Oscar nomination.
No I didn't get a call to star in another
installment of Big Girls from the planet Hillbilly. There was
something much more Fulfilly the first Annual Big Bash Bucy
(11:42):
Hollywood Senior pro You can rock and you can roll
in play corn hole at the prom. You can eat
little winters and dance within between ers at the prog.
Don't be surprised if you catch from making out with your.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
Mom put it us a buck bang.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
The idea come to me because so many stars and
starlets of a certain age missed their proms due to
their work obligations. But when Old Magnanimous abuse his senses
of need, he does his dad gum best to rectify.
Crazy Frankie and I found the perfect venue. Now, when
you're looking for a place like that, it's important to
(12:24):
have somewhere the most Hollywood knew about and had been to.
And this was an abandoned warehouse in West Hollywood where
they used to make pink pucker peets, butt beads and
booty paraphernalia. Yeah yea, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yah yeah yeah,
goes a weasel. A thrill that's cheaper than a gallon
(12:44):
of diesel. Pull the cord and get a treat. It
can't be beat at pink pucker peats. Your world will
be different come the dawn. Is that a farner? Just
to y'all get it?
Speaker 1 (12:54):
Got it good enough?
Speaker 2 (13:01):
As anyone who's ever been to a prom knows, the
theme is a big deal. Crazy Frankie suggested a return
to Epstein's Island, but we realized that most of the
gals attending would be over eighteen, So that was a wash.
We throw it around, has beans and les beans, but
(13:21):
it felt like we was leaving some folks out. Maybe
we needed to be edgy. So two girls, one cup
almost made the cut, but then we prized to go
and rate for barf buckets and it just didn't make
dollars and cents.
Speaker 1 (13:35):
Get it hard hardy har harr.
Speaker 2 (13:41):
In the end, we played it safe with Promie Wood
the sequel, Get your tickets, don't be late, come alone,
don't need a date, a passel full of straits and fruits.
When morning comes, he'll be knocking.
Speaker 15 (13:50):
Boots, push pull, push pull, just like riding up Brahma
bull Man.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
As far as food went, we had little meat balls
and pigs in a blanket and the food weren't bad neither,
but the food weren't nearly as impressive as the amenities.
I got a hold of some of my buddies that
got this classic car club and they set up a
dozen vintage cars around the perimeter of the dance floor. See,
(14:21):
so when these horn dogs had the mood hit them,
they had a back seat they could retire to so
they could do what comes naturally. And boy was at
a hit Brigitte Nielsen and Flavor flave rekindled their romance
in the back seat of a vintage Caddy. New Odd
couple Caitlyn Jenner and Tanya Harding wound up in the
back of a Chevy Van and that's all right with me.
(14:46):
Share kidnapped one of the teenage Valet Parkers into an
old Chevy in Pala. That didn't last long. After about
five minutes he come out of that car scarima like
a band say a it's a shame, really, that's probably
the first time he ever saw a naked woman. He'll
(15:13):
be scarred for life. And Dayton Nathan Lane for it's
all set down seeing all that gray and Wrinkley gives
a fellow the shrively shrinklyes them giant teeth Audentery on
the dated girl bored in this century, Robin Gary wins again.
Speaker 5 (15:27):
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, it was a night of wonders and
miracles Diary.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
A record producer was there and the band we hired,
the Whistling Bungholes, got a contract, but no other regard.
Robert de Niro went home with a white woman and
Sydney Sweeney landed a big movie. And she doesn't even
have to take them Hooters out for the walk. By
the time the night was over, about five hundred folks
(16:00):
at the time of their lives, and they owe it
all of me. On the way out the door, we
handed out fifty percent off coupons to the West Hollywood
Frea Clinic. We even gave one hundred percent off coupons
to Andy Dick and Kathy Griffin on account of they
were in charge of cleaning the back seats. Gary Busey says,
(16:22):
you're welcome.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
All well, Dowry, I.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
Got a ski daddle, Me and Kathy Bates are going
for our monthly Bukini wax and let me tell you, brother,
it's an all the fine until next time. XAS and
O's Gary.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
Beuse Good morning, everybody. The Big Show is on the radio.
Speaker 8 (16:55):
Hangout.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
We're gonna show our acting shops coming up.
Speaker 16 (17:00):
Not an actor, damn you. I'm a movie stop. I
did one play in summer stop. I have one line.
I forgot it. Thank god I can write down all
my bits. I'm the jump Boy and Billy Big Show.
Speaker 3 (17:55):
Good morning.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
It is to make show on the radio. John Moore's
Wonderful Thing Number one hundred and forty two. There's a
challenge coin, the official two thousand and seven team coin
for National Guard Racing inaugural season. You know O seven
power Speed Victory one eight hundred gold Guard.
Speaker 7 (18:21):
Do you it?
Speaker 1 (18:22):
Get your name in the hat and win it, give
it away. Friday hit the last hour off on the
Big Show. Wordy Word still to playing another episode of
married Man Phone six oh No, Big Shoe rose on
(18:45):
Good Morning, Big Shows on the Radio. Coming up, we
play wordy Word for LS Tractor prize pack includes hat,
stainless steel insulated tumbler and a keychain. Is fine your
logo dealer? Click on the link at the Big Show
dot com.
Speaker 2 (18:58):
Hang on blackboard and.
Speaker 17 (19:05):
My read man, my ried.
Speaker 13 (19:07):
Man drives around in a minivan.
Speaker 1 (19:10):
Life for him has nothing.
Speaker 9 (19:12):
Life will let him do what the she says.
Speaker 1 (19:16):
It's about timing groove. Well, there's a school.
Speaker 9 (19:20):
Look you'll find the married mine as our story opens
married Man and it is Powell College buddy heading home
from work after a long hard week. Hey, thanks again
for giving me a left home, Powell.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
No Prau Bob, So honey, Bunny's got the minivan.
Speaker 9 (19:34):
Huh Yeah. The Neighborhood Canasta League went to Centerville for
the big Southeastern Regionals. She volunteered to be the designated driver.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
Hello, is she going to be gone?
Speaker 9 (19:44):
Well, the finals are tonight, so winter loose. She'll be
back around lunchtime tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
Oh you're a bachelor.
Speaker 7 (19:50):
Huh.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Hey, me and some of the guys from office going
to Sporties to watch the game.
Speaker 16 (19:53):
You want to come?
Speaker 9 (19:55):
I don't know. I'm kind of be Come on.
Speaker 1 (19:57):
It'll be fun. You never do anything with me. Hey,
we might even make a little side trip to the
KitKat club.
Speaker 9 (20:03):
You're pervert? Is that all you ever think about?
Speaker 3 (20:05):
Hey?
Speaker 1 (20:05):
My god, you wouldn't try it sometimes?
Speaker 2 (20:08):
Yeah?
Speaker 9 (20:08):
Yeah, yeah, listen, thanks, but no, thanks suit yourself.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Give me coffee, change your mind?
Speaker 9 (20:14):
Okay, thanks again for the ride. After enjoying a zesty
lean cuisine for dinner, married man settles down in front
of the TV. Well, let's see what's on the old
idiot box?
Speaker 4 (20:29):
Information?
Speaker 6 (20:30):
Not your naked dreams?
Speaker 9 (20:32):
Oh? Perfect, I love TV Land. Hello. Oh hi, honeybunny,
how'll the tournament go? Oh? That's too bad? So what
do you while? A woman got on tap for tonight?
Speaker 7 (20:49):
Huh?
Speaker 9 (20:51):
What's that food poisoning? Huh? Bad batch of kung pow
chicken at the buffet everybody, would you? Oh? Well, I
guess that Jenny Craig turned out to be your best
friend after all.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Huh.
Speaker 9 (21:05):
So you're just going to be kind of stuck there
at the hotel tonight. Huh. Gee, that's a shame. But
oh I'm just chilling in front of the TV. Yeah, honey,
could you excuse me for just a second, I've got
another call coming in? Hello? No, hello, mother Fletcher. How
are you? Oh that's a shame. We'll try soaking it
(21:30):
in some hot water. Maybe that would help. What's that? Yes,
I was just talking to her. No, they lost. Yeah,
she's going to be back in the morning. I'll tell
her you called all right, goodbye? Hello, honey, that was
your mom. Her toe swelled up again. Yeah, that's what
I told her. Huh.
Speaker 11 (21:53):
I know.
Speaker 9 (21:53):
I wish you were here with me too. What's that?
What would I do if you were? Gee? I don't
know what You want me to think about it? And
then describe what I do and don't leave out any
juicy details. Are you asking me to do what I
(22:15):
think you're asking me to do? Well, I don't know.
I guess i'd start by turning off the TV. Honey, Monny,
are you sure about this? I mean, I don't know
what to say. Well, okay, what are you wearing? Really?
(22:39):
The one I gave you for your birthday? Why in
the world did you pack that for a trip to
the canasta tournament? What? Oh, it's just a fantasy. I'm sorry. Okay,
go ahead, honey, there's the call waiting again. Excuse me
just a second. Hello, Yes, mother Fletcher. What's that? Yes,
I suppose some salt in the water. Else, Yes, ma'am,
(23:01):
I'm sure the store brand kind is just as good
as Morton's. Yes, salt is salt, ma'am. Listen, it's not
that I don't want to help you, but honey, money
is calling long distance. Yes, ma'am, Thank you, goodbye. Okay,
I'm back. What no, Listen, I just don't think I
can can can make nasty wasashty talk over the phone.
(23:22):
I just can't, just because what I don't have to? Oh,
thanks for understanding. I just what You'll do the talking
and I can can join in whenever I feel like it. Well, okay,
uh huh uh huh. I knock on your door and
(23:45):
I'm dressed as who honey, why would the pool man
be on the fifteenth floor of the hotel at nine
o'clock at night. What, yes, I know what a fantasy is. Okay,
I'm sorry, go ahead, Uh huh. And then what would
you do? Really? Gee? Wouldn't that be a little bit awkward?
Speaker 7 (24:06):
What?
Speaker 9 (24:07):
It wouldn't matter because by then you'd be totally naked.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
Gee?
Speaker 9 (24:13):
Whiz? What would I say? Well, I guess i'd say, honey,
I'm sorry, Could you hold on one more second? Hello? Yes,
mother Fletcher, ma'am, I'm kind of in the middle of
something right now. I'll call you first thing in the morning,
I promise. Okay, goodbye. Okay, Now where were we? Oh? Yeah,
(24:37):
maybe you'd like me to cover you with this cup
of chocolate pudding from the mini bar and nibble on
you until mother, Mother Fletcher, I'm sorry, I thought you
were somebody else. No, I mean I thought you were Hello. Hello,
(24:57):
all a mistaken eye da day. As married man's romantic
moment goes swirling down the toilet, we invite you to
tune it again for our next sprink to titaning adventure,
Same married time, same married channel. There's a school. Look
you'll find the married.
Speaker 3 (25:14):
Nine Good Monday morning.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
It's a big show on the radio. I feature track
with the Big Show, Big Box Oliver's Rules for women,
Women Rules, you know that little big box at the
Big Show dot com and right now and everybody's head
about the bed.
Speaker 16 (25:56):
Little wordy word of a worthy word.
Speaker 1 (25:58):
Let's meet our contestant. We got Matt from a Rocky
Mount Virginia. Good morning, Matt, Good morning, Hey morning for
having me man. Welcome in here.
Speaker 18 (26:09):
Matt.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
He's gonna be on John Boy's team. Can it get
any better?
Speaker 8 (26:13):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (26:14):
Matt, you know we're gonna win? Oh so then let's
meet John out of good View, Virginia. Good morning, John,
Good morning guys. Hey boy, that's Tater's teammate right there, John,
all right, a couple of Virginia boys here, and uh
(26:35):
is Rocky Mountain? Is that close to good View?
Speaker 2 (26:37):
Matt?
Speaker 1 (26:37):
Johnny, y' all close to each other? You know you're
Virginia geography there?
Speaker 7 (26:42):
What about twenty five minutes?
Speaker 2 (26:43):
Part right?
Speaker 1 (26:44):
Thank you? I got a picture on my head, all right,
I got it.
Speaker 6 (26:48):
Are you gonna check that?
Speaker 1 (26:51):
No, We're gonna do with words that deal with traditional marriages,
traditional marriages between a man and a woman. I'm guessing huh.
Speaker 6 (26:59):
If that's your definition, is't that a shame?
Speaker 1 (27:04):
My wife was just I'm wrong with everything.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
So I got this.
Speaker 1 (27:09):
Well, John, you relax, me and Matt will go for
the first thirty seconds. Are you ready?
Speaker 3 (27:13):
Matt?
Speaker 7 (27:15):
Yes, sir?
Speaker 1 (27:15):
All right? Oh no, started off. I just remember that
from Friday, the booking word about guilty.
Speaker 6 (27:23):
He said, don't ever let.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
All right, there we go, Here we go, Matt. Word's
dealing with traditional marriage. Start the clock now. The guy
asked the girl, will you blank me Mary?
Speaker 2 (27:38):
Yes? Uh huh?
Speaker 1 (27:39):
A blank gown? She wears a no another another name.
She is the watch, he's the groom, she is the right, right,
So what kind of gown. It's a couple of letters.
It's a couple of letters. Okay, all right, you say
these to each other, you say your bow. Uh huh.
(28:02):
You get married in a clam on the bus. All right,
good deal, So a four on the board.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
All right.
Speaker 1 (28:11):
I'm sorry I never heard him say that, woman, but
thank you for listening for me. Uh so, John Taylor
brand you were ready, John, ready and.
Speaker 7 (28:22):
Go h you invite your friends and blank to your wedding.
Speaker 6 (28:28):
Friends and okay, all right?
Speaker 7 (28:31):
Uh first came love, then came marriage, then came blank
in a blank carriage? Then come these are your mother
and father?
Speaker 1 (28:42):
Are your parents?
Speaker 7 (28:45):
Uh? Huh oh this is when you have an affair,
you've committed an.
Speaker 9 (28:50):
Adultery.
Speaker 6 (28:51):
Yes, oh this is and some I'll be hurt.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
All right, Well you all put a four on the
board to tie it up.
Speaker 9 (29:00):
Four to four?
Speaker 1 (29:01):
All right, time going in around two. Alright, Matt, booking
word a wife would do it?
Speaker 2 (29:08):
That dude?
Speaker 1 (29:09):
You ready, Matt, all right, start the clock. Now, this
is what to set up a wedding like the Royalty
does it and the darlings did it in Mayberry. It's
a blank blank Wow, two words. It's not just a
random you're gonna wed. No, it's like two words like
(29:34):
your parents plan out who you're gonna marry.
Speaker 2 (29:37):
So it's a.
Speaker 1 (29:40):
Yes marriage, yes, yes, all right, and then you have
the wedding blank in the church. The wedding okay, recital,
Oh wow, we only got a one.
Speaker 3 (29:54):
Don't go.
Speaker 1 (29:55):
That was a tough one.
Speaker 7 (29:57):
All right.
Speaker 1 (29:59):
Five on the lord. Well, let's see what John and
Taylor has. That's their obstacle to get to to win
one to tie, all right, he said, ceremony already ready
after the busy way.
Speaker 7 (30:15):
Alright, start the clock now, all right, you hope to
buy one of these with a white picket fence. Oh
hell yeah, Oh you have to go to court and
get a license to make it.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Blank.
Speaker 6 (30:30):
You win.
Speaker 1 (30:33):
Six to five is what you needed. Matt Dog Yonner
came up a little short, buddy, but you try again.
In time, We'll get Jackie to make that happen. All right,
all right, thank you, all right man, Thank you boy, John,
look at you. I'p good for you playing worthy word
winning a big old prize back from LS tracked. Congratulations.
Speaker 6 (30:53):
Wait, I was in the middle of a sentence, good.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Morning, got a big show on the radio. Tainter asked
me the bequest. But I hope you understand that this
does not make sense to me.
Speaker 6 (31:09):
I just wrote it down.
Speaker 1 (31:11):
Let me say what you got here, girl, Michael Rakowski.
Michael says, I like to hear Tarmac the Magnificent And
if not, why don't y'all run up an alley and
holler fish respectfully, yours, Michael Rokowski, Crossville, Tennessee.
Speaker 2 (31:26):
L y M.
Speaker 1 (31:27):
I I love you mean it.
Speaker 6 (31:29):
So I'm assuming it must be Andy Griffin.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
Yes it is, Gomer told Barney that when he gave
him a ticket. Barney gave Gomer a ticket for a
legal U turn. Why don't you go now and holler fish?
Speaker 2 (31:42):
Yeah?
Speaker 8 (31:43):
Okay, it loses something when you're out of.
Speaker 11 (31:48):
Well.
Speaker 1 (31:48):
Good job, Michael, World, the same wave, Blue Buddy, you
got it coming up next, Good morning, Big Show's on
(32:18):
the radio. Big Show fan, Mayberry fan, Michael koles get
getting ready to get in the request ready, didn't I
have you look up that we're going with. Tell Barney,
why don't you run up now and holler fish? Because
they used to sell fish.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
Yeah, in the outway, in.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
The alleys between the stores. Everything so going. We wanting
Barney do that. So people think Barney was selling fish.
Speaker 6 (32:41):
Got you got you got, you got.
Speaker 1 (32:47):
That boat.
Speaker 2 (32:49):
We're trying.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
We're trying, Michael. And now, ladies and gentlemen, it's time
once again Fire mysterious visitor from the East, the all seeing,
all knowing, and former holder of a job that's sounding
good but turned out to be terrible. Tarmac the magnificent.
Speaker 13 (33:08):
You know, sometimes this job feels.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
Like any clip back I hold in my hands the
envelopes as a child of four complaintly see these envelopes
are hermetically sealed. They've been kept in a man as
jar with Gary Busey's toothbrush and snoon yesterday. Oh. No
one knows the contents of these envelopes, but you and
your mystical and semiavan Way will ascertain the answers to
(33:31):
these questions, having never before seen the questions. Are you ready?
Speaker 13 (33:35):
Well, I've handled Gary Busey's toothbrush? Apparently so, yes, you.
Speaker 1 (33:39):
Washed up ears? Envelope Number one high Diddley Ho, High,
Diddley Hoe.
Speaker 13 (33:48):
What do you say when you meet a Diddley Holy?
Speaker 14 (33:52):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (33:52):
Right?
Speaker 1 (33:54):
Envelope Number two.
Speaker 13 (33:57):
Decentis? Decentis who bring a to toys on a Christmas morning?
Speaker 1 (34:08):
I've a love? Number three.
Speaker 13 (34:11):
The Baconator, The Baconator, who's the fattest member of the
Justice League?
Speaker 1 (34:21):
Who was giving going ive loove? Number four?
Speaker 13 (34:25):
Moonshiners?
Speaker 1 (34:27):
Moonshiners?
Speaker 13 (34:30):
Who has the worst job at the Bikini Wax Place?
It wasn't my idea, they were already doing it. Number
five The Breakfast Club, The Breakfast Club? What does Fred
Flintstone use to fix the toaster.
Speaker 8 (34:54):
Club?
Speaker 1 (34:56):
Word Ivelope? Number six?
Speaker 13 (35:00):
Pac Man pack Man? What will Tommy Chong do the
day his wife throws him out of the house.
Speaker 1 (35:08):
Man man, all right, I'm a love number seven.
Speaker 13 (35:15):
The Delta variant. The Delta variant describe an airline with
cheap seats, roomy seats, and great food.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
It's a opposite.
Speaker 13 (35:33):
Don't start helping now.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
I'm a love number eight.
Speaker 18 (35:38):
Zippity doo da, zippity doo dah. What do you say
to super Mario when his fly is down? Number nine?
Speaker 13 (35:53):
Cheers?
Speaker 1 (35:54):
Cheers?
Speaker 13 (35:57):
What does Reba McIntyre have around her kitchen table?
Speaker 1 (36:02):
Oh you can do it? The tarback I hold in
my hands the final.
Speaker 13 (36:14):
And nobody's happier about it than me. There you go.
A game of pickleball and ship's creak.
Speaker 1 (36:26):
A game of pickleball and ships creak?
Speaker 13 (36:31):
Name two bad places to be without a paddle.
Speaker 1 (36:36):
Tara, the sun.
Speaker 2 (36:49):
God suck.
Speaker 1 (37:03):
Good morning, and it's a big showing the radio. Y'all
get a chance to check that John Boy and Billy
Facebook page, and him old Buddy Potter says they got
me a new dog. Check out the picture all right
of Potter.
Speaker 6 (37:18):
I will love him at puteam call him.
Speaker 1 (37:21):
Swords nicely, Yoah boy Billy facebook page is what y'all say,
all right fundament box keywords, women, rules, rings up, this
visit with a big guy. It is time for Oliver.
Speaker 17 (37:42):
When when when women nowadays, we try to be patient,
we try to be understanding, but it seems that every
time we laid down a set of rules, the skirts
just don't. Yes, they think we're trying to control them,
(38:03):
when in reality we're trying to help them, because once
they finally learn what we expect of them, the better
off we're all gonna be.
Speaker 2 (38:13):
Well.
Speaker 17 (38:14):
Ladies, you better grab a pen, Tata will have somebody
check your spelling, and get ready to write, because this
is the last time we're going to tell you. And
please note these are all number one because they're all
equally important. Number one, regardless of what you and your
girlfriends assume, men are not mind readers. Number one, learn
(38:40):
to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it down.
We kneed it up, you kneed it down. You don't
hear us whining about you leaving it down. Put on
your big girl panties and deal with it.
Speaker 1 (38:57):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (38:58):
Sunday sports are like the full moon or the changing tides.
Speaker 2 (39:03):
Just let it be.
Speaker 1 (39:06):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (39:08):
Shopping is not a sport, and no We're never gonna
think of it that way, so forget it. Number one.
If you don't get your own way, don't cry. Crying
is blackmail, but we do get a good laugh out
of it. Number one. Ask for what you want. Let's
(39:32):
be clear on this one. Subtle hints don't work. Strong
hints don't work. Obvious hints don't work.
Speaker 1 (39:40):
Just say it.
Speaker 17 (39:44):
If we wanted to crack a code, we joined the
CIA eenough already.
Speaker 1 (39:52):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (39:54):
Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers to most questions.
Speaker 1 (40:01):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (40:03):
Come to us with a problem only if you want
help solving it. That's what men do. If you want sympathy,
call your girlfriend. Number one. A headache that lasts for
seventeen months is a problem. Either see a doctor or
(40:23):
call an escort service.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
For mean.
Speaker 17 (40:28):
Number one, anything said six months ago is inadmissible in
an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void
after seven days. Shut up, good girl, see she's learning.
Speaker 1 (40:44):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (40:45):
If you won't dress like a Victoria's Secret model, don't
expect us to act like soap opera guys.
Speaker 1 (40:53):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (40:54):
If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask
us unless you're looking for the truth. Yes, I can
see it from here. I would write that one down.
(41:19):
Number one. If something we said can be interpreted two ways,
and one of the ways makes you sad or angry,
we meant the other ones. Number one. You can either
ask us to do something or tell us how you
want it done, not both. If you already know best
(41:41):
how to do it, then do it yourself.
Speaker 2 (41:48):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (41:49):
Whenever possible, please say what you have to say during commercials.
Number one. All men see only sixteen colors. Peach is
a fruit, not a color. Same with pumpkin. We have
(42:10):
no idea what marv is. Number one. Number one. If
you're keeping track, if it itches, we scratch it. That's
how we roll baby.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (42:29):
If we ask what's wrong and you say nothing, we
will act like nothing's wrong. We know you're lying, but
it's just not worth the hassle. Number one. If you
ask a question you don't really want an answer to,
expect an answer you don't really want to hear.
Speaker 2 (42:46):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (42:48):
When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you want
to wear is fine.
Speaker 3 (42:52):
Really.
Speaker 1 (42:54):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (42:55):
Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you're prepared
to discuss topics like baseball, handgun safety or pawn and
number one you have enough clothes, you have too many shoes,
and I am in shape. Round is a shape. Thank
(43:18):
you for listening. Yes, I know I have to sleep
on the couch tonight, but you know what I like it.
It's like camping.
Speaker 13 (43:31):
That's how we roll.
Speaker 1 (43:32):
Baby big boxes.
Speaker 11 (43:36):
Here all your favorites from four decades of The Big
Show ninety nine since each fifteen for nine ninety nine.
Speaker 13 (43:40):
Buy them once, play them anywhere.
Speaker 9 (43:42):
You can shop the mid Box online right now at
the Big Show dot Com. Order a Big Show step
I phone. The number is eight hundred and four to
seven one Stuff online services by Animate dot Com.
Speaker 1 (43:51):
Have you missed any of The Big Show this morning?
You can hear it now. The John bore Milling Late
Risers podcast up next. Wherever you get your podcast, make
it easy. Subscribe to us with a free I Heeart
radio app. I Love You mean It
Did you said me?
Speaker 2 (00:27):
No?
Speaker 1 (00:28):
Eleven days? Okay, it's just a big show on the
radio for your Monday Mage twelve.
Speaker 3 (00:35):
Then jump on in.
Speaker 4 (00:36):
Here and play our games. Marcy Marcia, he got the tools,
got the talent. Say they're in her place and now
does meet the contestants from Beautiful Cachet, Oklahoma.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
It's Roger.
Speaker 5 (00:56):
Hey, Roger, good morning, Hey on there.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Body way are all somehows have a tang? And oh Goohama?
Speaker 6 (01:09):
Order?
Speaker 1 (01:14):
Do you agree or disagree?
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (01:17):
Roger will get you two bills for two buzzers. That's
your gold win, the big old haven't heard prize pack.
So get in tune with Tater.
Speaker 7 (01:25):
Ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready.
Speaker 2 (01:29):
I'm all right.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Which US states has the highest percentage of people who
walk to work?
Speaker 6 (01:39):
State? States? The state of depression.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
That's what it is, depressed, coach. You don't have a car,
have a car? Oh no, no, think this out.
Speaker 6 (01:48):
Okay, let me think, Let me think, Let me think.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
Who is gotest of US states?
Speaker 6 (01:54):
Yeah? Yeah, you to choose from I say Massachusetts.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
Any particular reason.
Speaker 6 (01:59):
It's a big eight, okay, Scot Boston in.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
It, Roger. The percentages, I don't know you're gonna play them.
Do you agree or disagree? She got some unknown information
on this one. Massachusetts has abate, pretty big place. But
I'm gonna disagree on this. Okay, Well that was the
thing to do. Yeah, it was Alaska, Alaska. They walked
(02:25):
a word weird cold there, very good? Yeah, alright, there's
a bell for rides.
Speaker 6 (02:33):
I see Russia from my house.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
One more. Okay, you're good with it today. Tombstone serve
to identify the deceased, but they were originally created to
prevent something awful from happening.
Speaker 6 (02:48):
What was it from forgetting where you buried him?
Speaker 1 (02:52):
That would be awful.
Speaker 7 (02:55):
No, you don't like that one. No, I saw this
in a movie. It's to keep animals them diging, them
dig up.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
The toombstones were originally prevented to prevent animals from digging
up the graves. Pretty awful, Roger, agree or disagree? I
tell you what, I'm gonna gree on that one. That's
what that sounds good to tell you on that one. No, God, No,
So the dead couldn't escape, isn't that crazy?
Speaker 8 (03:26):
Well, personally I kind of want them to.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
So are you saying you researched this raady. I'm sure
I know it's true. So the dead, they thought the
dead might escape.
Speaker 8 (03:38):
There was a whole bunch of weird things going on
in the graveyards at that time. People were literally getting
buried alive a lot.
Speaker 6 (03:45):
So wouldn't you want them to escape?
Speaker 8 (03:47):
Well, you would think that, but you know so, I
mean they dug some caskets from that time period and
you can see claw marks on the inside.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
That's awful. That's why they put a bell on the
foot around.
Speaker 8 (04:00):
Some people who had money could hire and buy a
bell that would be you know, mounted above the grave
and the string would go down to the casket.
Speaker 6 (04:10):
And pay for the graveyard shift.
Speaker 8 (04:12):
That's what the graveyard shift was for people.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
Just yep, wow, all right, doesn't learn something?
Speaker 6 (04:20):
I really thought it was animals from digging them up.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
So, uh, let me say, Roger, what did you do wrong?
Speaker 6 (04:29):
So he agreed, agreed with the right.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
So there's that buzzer all right here it is on
the full cow. All right, Tayter, You've seen it on
TV a thousand times, But do the police really outline
a murder victim's body with chalk or tape?
Speaker 6 (04:45):
This This this contest took a turn didn't. Yeah, they
still do it, but they do it with silly strengths.
They don't do that anymore.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
No, they do not do that, Roger, Do you agree
or disagree?
Speaker 9 (05:06):
I'm gonna say, if you die and they give you
a pretty frame to be outlined in, I must say
that fault.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
I don't think they do.
Speaker 10 (05:11):
It no more.
Speaker 9 (05:12):
Can't agree.
Speaker 1 (05:13):
So he agrees and entators said no, and that was
that's the way to win the game, Roger. All right,
Mater five cops stopped doing that decades ago after they
figured out that it contaminated crime scenes. All right, there it.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
Is, Rogers.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Wait to go, buddy, big old prize pack. We'll get
to you out your pad in Oklahoma. Man, I appreciate that, y'all.
Take care, ah, Roger, Man, that's wild about people getting
buried alive that much.
Speaker 8 (05:50):
But you know, the funeral home industry really changed the
name of one of the rooms in your house.
Speaker 9 (05:55):
You know.
Speaker 8 (05:56):
They when someone died in the family, they used to
hold the servant is and they keep the dead body
in the house. Generally they would keep it in the parlor,
but the funeral industry came in and changed that. They
they built this place for them to go instead, and
they would, you know, go in and solicit the people
of the deceased family and say, you don't want to
(06:17):
keep your you know, your dead person here. You you know,
let's not make your parlor a room of the dead.
Make it a living space. And that's why we today
call it the living room.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Would you get that?
Speaker 9 (06:32):
That's helpful? Andy?
Speaker 6 (06:35):
Well, thanks, it's just story there for a little while.
What do you think, John boy?
Speaker 5 (06:41):
I believe it's true.
Speaker 11 (06:53):
M h.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Good morning. That's a big show on the radio, My
married Man Monday. One of the guy is thinking about it,
requests coming in for this this tune, the jazz married
man theme song.
Speaker 12 (07:37):
It married man, married man drives around in a minivan,
(08:18):
got a wife, andsome kids, his whole e songs.
Speaker 3 (08:22):
Kids.
Speaker 13 (08:22):
Hey, there there goes a married man. How's he field listened?
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Dude?
Speaker 11 (08:30):
This poor guy's really screwed, hanging on by a thread,
quarter milk, loaf of bread.
Speaker 13 (08:38):
Hey, fred, ain't that the married man.
Speaker 11 (08:43):
Gotta big gas. Girl buys his clothes at the gap
and he's just about had love of this craft married man,
married man, friendly neighborhood married man. When he's whole, he's ignored.
Maybe that's why he's so bored.
Speaker 10 (09:03):
O Lord, it's hard for a married man.
Speaker 11 (09:39):
You work hard every day till the day that he's dead.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
He wants crying marry you.
Speaker 9 (09:47):
He'll just squeeze on your head.
Speaker 11 (09:50):
Married man, married man, friendly neighborhood, married man. Life for
him has no sing wife won't let him do the
things she says.
Speaker 1 (10:02):
It's about time.
Speaker 11 (10:04):
He grows up, weary of the scowl up.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
You fine married.
Speaker 14 (10:18):
Man, Good morning, make shows on the radio, Turn it up.
Speaker 1 (11:04):
And now an entry into the diary of Gary Busey.
Speaker 2 (11:10):
Dear Diary, this is Gary Beauty.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
Well Diary.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
I'm just checking in to gloat on another incredible, amazing, fantastical,
inspirational beauty accomplishment. No, I didn't get another Oscar nomination.
No I didn't get a call to star in another
installment of Big Girls from the planet Hillbilly. There was
something much more Fulfilly the first Annual Big Bash Bucy
(11:42):
Hollywood Senior pro You can rock and you can roll
in play corn hole at the prom. You can eat
little winters and dance within between ers at the prog.
Don't be surprised if you catch from making out with your.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
Mom put it us a buck bang.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
The idea come to me because so many stars and
starlets of a certain age missed their proms due to
their work obligations. But when Old Magnanimous abuse his senses
of need, he does his dad gum best to rectify.
Crazy Frankie and I found the perfect venue. Now, when
you're looking for a place like that, it's important to
(12:24):
have somewhere the most Hollywood knew about and had been to.
And this was an abandoned warehouse in West Hollywood where
they used to make pink pucker peets, butt beads and
booty paraphernalia. Yeah yea, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yah yeah yeah,
goes a weasel. A thrill that's cheaper than a gallon
(12:44):
of diesel. Pull the cord and get a treat. It
can't be beat at pink pucker peats. Your world will
be different come the dawn. Is that a farner? Just
to y'all get it?
Speaker 1 (12:54):
Got it good enough?
Speaker 2 (13:01):
As anyone who's ever been to a prom knows, the
theme is a big deal. Crazy Frankie suggested a return
to Epstein's Island, but we realized that most of the
gals attending would be over eighteen, So that was a wash.
We throw it around, has beans and les beans, but
(13:21):
it felt like we was leaving some folks out. Maybe
we needed to be edgy. So two girls, one cup
almost made the cut, but then we prized to go
and rate for barf buckets and it just didn't make
dollars and cents.
Speaker 1 (13:35):
Get it hard hardy har harr.
Speaker 2 (13:41):
In the end, we played it safe with Promie Wood
the sequel, Get your tickets, don't be late, come alone,
don't need a date, a passel full of straits and fruits.
When morning comes, he'll be knocking.
Speaker 15 (13:50):
Boots, push pull, push pull, just like riding up Brahma
bull Man.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
As far as food went, we had little meat balls
and pigs in a blanket and the food weren't bad neither,
but the food weren't nearly as impressive as the amenities.
I got a hold of some of my buddies that
got this classic car club and they set up a
dozen vintage cars around the perimeter of the dance floor. See,
(14:21):
so when these horn dogs had the mood hit them,
they had a back seat they could retire to so
they could do what comes naturally. And boy was at
a hit Brigitte Nielsen and Flavor flave rekindled their romance
in the back seat of a vintage Caddy. New Odd
couple Caitlyn Jenner and Tanya Harding wound up in the
back of a Chevy Van and that's all right with me.
(14:46):
Share kidnapped one of the teenage Valet Parkers into an
old Chevy in Pala. That didn't last long. After about
five minutes he come out of that car scarima like
a band say a it's a shame, really, that's probably
the first time he ever saw a naked woman. He'll
(15:13):
be scarred for life. And Dayton Nathan Lane for it's
all set down seeing all that gray and Wrinkley gives
a fellow the shrively shrinklyes them giant teeth Audentery on
the dated girl bored in this century, Robin Gary wins again.
Speaker 5 (15:27):
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, it was a night of wonders and
miracles Diary.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
A record producer was there and the band we hired,
the Whistling Bungholes, got a contract, but no other regard.
Robert de Niro went home with a white woman and
Sydney Sweeney landed a big movie. And she doesn't even
have to take them Hooters out for the walk. By
the time the night was over, about five hundred folks
(16:00):
at the time of their lives, and they owe it
all of me. On the way out the door, we
handed out fifty percent off coupons to the West Hollywood
Frea Clinic. We even gave one hundred percent off coupons
to Andy Dick and Kathy Griffin on account of they
were in charge of cleaning the back seats. Gary Busey says,
(16:22):
you're welcome.
Speaker 1 (16:25):
All well, Dowry, I.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
Got a ski daddle, Me and Kathy Bates are going
for our monthly Bukini wax and let me tell you, brother,
it's an all the fine until next time. XAS and
O's Gary.
Speaker 1 (16:49):
Beuse Good morning, everybody. The Big Show is on the radio.
Speaker 8 (16:55):
Hangout.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
We're gonna show our acting shops coming up.
Speaker 16 (17:00):
Not an actor, damn you. I'm a movie stop. I
did one play in summer stop. I have one line.
I forgot it. Thank god I can write down all
my bits. I'm the jump Boy and Billy Big Show.
Speaker 3 (17:55):
Good morning.
Speaker 1 (17:56):
It is to make show on the radio. John Moore's
Wonderful Thing Number one hundred and forty two. There's a
challenge coin, the official two thousand and seven team coin
for National Guard Racing inaugural season. You know O seven
power Speed Victory one eight hundred gold Guard.
Speaker 7 (18:21):
Do you it?
Speaker 1 (18:22):
Get your name in the hat and win it, give
it away. Friday hit the last hour off on the
Big Show. Wordy Word still to playing another episode of
married Man Phone six oh No, Big Shoe rose on
(18:45):
Good Morning, Big Shows on the Radio. Coming up, we
play wordy Word for LS Tractor prize pack includes hat,
stainless steel insulated tumbler and a keychain. Is fine your
logo dealer? Click on the link at the Big Show
dot com.
Speaker 2 (18:58):
Hang on blackboard and.
Speaker 17 (19:05):
My read man, my ried.
Speaker 13 (19:07):
Man drives around in a minivan.
Speaker 1 (19:10):
Life for him has nothing.
Speaker 9 (19:12):
Life will let him do what the she says.
Speaker 1 (19:16):
It's about timing groove. Well, there's a school.
Speaker 9 (19:20):
Look you'll find the married mine as our story opens
married Man and it is Powell College buddy heading home
from work after a long hard week. Hey, thanks again
for giving me a left home, Powell.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
No Prau Bob, So honey, Bunny's got the minivan.
Speaker 9 (19:34):
Huh Yeah. The Neighborhood Canasta League went to Centerville for
the big Southeastern Regionals. She volunteered to be the designated driver.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
Hello, is she going to be gone?
Speaker 9 (19:44):
Well, the finals are tonight, so winter loose. She'll be
back around lunchtime tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
Oh you're a bachelor.
Speaker 7 (19:50):
Huh.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Hey, me and some of the guys from office going
to Sporties to watch the game.
Speaker 16 (19:53):
You want to come?
Speaker 9 (19:55):
I don't know. I'm kind of be Come on.
Speaker 1 (19:57):
It'll be fun. You never do anything with me. Hey,
we might even make a little side trip to the
KitKat club.
Speaker 9 (20:03):
You're pervert? Is that all you ever think about?
Speaker 3 (20:05):
Hey?
Speaker 1 (20:05):
My god, you wouldn't try it sometimes?
Speaker 2 (20:08):
Yeah?
Speaker 9 (20:08):
Yeah, yeah, listen, thanks, but no, thanks suit yourself.
Speaker 1 (20:13):
Give me coffee, change your mind?
Speaker 9 (20:14):
Okay, thanks again for the ride. After enjoying a zesty
lean cuisine for dinner, married man settles down in front
of the TV. Well, let's see what's on the old
idiot box?
Speaker 4 (20:29):
Information?
Speaker 6 (20:30):
Not your naked dreams?
Speaker 9 (20:32):
Oh? Perfect, I love TV Land. Hello. Oh hi, honeybunny,
how'll the tournament go? Oh? That's too bad? So what
do you while? A woman got on tap for tonight?
Speaker 7 (20:49):
Huh?
Speaker 9 (20:51):
What's that food poisoning? Huh? Bad batch of kung pow
chicken at the buffet everybody, would you? Oh? Well, I
guess that Jenny Craig turned out to be your best
friend after all.
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Huh.
Speaker 9 (21:05):
So you're just going to be kind of stuck there
at the hotel tonight. Huh. Gee, that's a shame. But
oh I'm just chilling in front of the TV. Yeah, honey,
could you excuse me for just a second, I've got
another call coming in? Hello? No, hello, mother Fletcher. How
are you? Oh that's a shame. We'll try soaking it
(21:30):
in some hot water. Maybe that would help. What's that? Yes,
I was just talking to her. No, they lost. Yeah,
she's going to be back in the morning. I'll tell
her you called all right, goodbye? Hello, honey, that was
your mom. Her toe swelled up again. Yeah, that's what
I told her. Huh.
Speaker 11 (21:53):
I know.
Speaker 9 (21:53):
I wish you were here with me too. What's that?
What would I do if you were? Gee? I don't
know what You want me to think about it? And
then describe what I do and don't leave out any
juicy details. Are you asking me to do what I
(22:15):
think you're asking me to do? Well, I don't know.
I guess i'd start by turning off the TV. Honey, Monny,
are you sure about this? I mean, I don't know
what to say. Well, okay, what are you wearing? Really?
(22:39):
The one I gave you for your birthday? Why in
the world did you pack that for a trip to
the canasta tournament? What? Oh, it's just a fantasy. I'm sorry. Okay,
go ahead, honey, there's the call waiting again. Excuse me
just a second. Hello, Yes, mother Fletcher. What's that? Yes,
I suppose some salt in the water. Else, Yes, ma'am,
(23:01):
I'm sure the store brand kind is just as good
as Morton's. Yes, salt is salt, ma'am. Listen, it's not
that I don't want to help you, but honey, money
is calling long distance. Yes, ma'am, Thank you, goodbye. Okay,
I'm back. What no, Listen, I just don't think I
can can can make nasty wasashty talk over the phone.
(23:22):
I just can't, just because what I don't have to? Oh,
thanks for understanding. I just what You'll do the talking
and I can can join in whenever I feel like it. Well, okay,
uh huh uh huh. I knock on your door and
(23:45):
I'm dressed as who honey, why would the pool man
be on the fifteenth floor of the hotel at nine
o'clock at night. What, yes, I know what a fantasy is. Okay,
I'm sorry, go ahead, Uh huh. And then what would
you do? Really? Gee? Wouldn't that be a little bit awkward?
Speaker 7 (24:06):
What?
Speaker 9 (24:07):
It wouldn't matter because by then you'd be totally naked.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
Gee?
Speaker 9 (24:13):
Whiz? What would I say? Well, I guess i'd say, honey,
I'm sorry, Could you hold on one more second? Hello? Yes,
mother Fletcher, ma'am, I'm kind of in the middle of
something right now. I'll call you first thing in the morning,
I promise. Okay, goodbye. Okay, Now where were we? Oh? Yeah,
(24:37):
maybe you'd like me to cover you with this cup
of chocolate pudding from the mini bar and nibble on
you until mother, Mother Fletcher, I'm sorry, I thought you
were somebody else. No, I mean I thought you were Hello. Hello,
(24:57):
all a mistaken eye da day. As married man's romantic
moment goes swirling down the toilet, we invite you to
tune it again for our next sprink to titaning adventure,
Same married time, same married channel. There's a school. Look
you'll find the married.
Speaker 3 (25:14):
Nine Good Monday morning.
Speaker 1 (25:42):
It's a big show on the radio. I feature track
with the Big Show, Big Box Oliver's Rules for women,
Women Rules, you know that little big box at the
Big Show dot com and right now and everybody's head
about the bed.
Speaker 16 (25:56):
Little wordy word of a worthy word.
Speaker 1 (25:58):
Let's meet our contestant. We got Matt from a Rocky
Mount Virginia. Good morning, Matt, Good morning, Hey morning for
having me man. Welcome in here.
Speaker 18 (26:09):
Matt.
Speaker 1 (26:09):
He's gonna be on John Boy's team. Can it get
any better?
Speaker 8 (26:13):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (26:14):
Matt, you know we're gonna win? Oh so then let's
meet John out of good View, Virginia. Good morning, John,
Good morning guys. Hey boy, that's Tater's teammate right there, John,
all right, a couple of Virginia boys here, and uh
(26:35):
is Rocky Mountain? Is that close to good View?
Speaker 2 (26:37):
Matt?
Speaker 1 (26:37):
Johnny, y' all close to each other? You know you're
Virginia geography there?
Speaker 7 (26:42):
What about twenty five minutes?
Speaker 2 (26:43):
Part right?
Speaker 1 (26:44):
Thank you? I got a picture on my head, all right,
I got it.
Speaker 6 (26:48):
Are you gonna check that?
Speaker 1 (26:51):
No, We're gonna do with words that deal with traditional marriages,
traditional marriages between a man and a woman. I'm guessing huh.
Speaker 6 (26:59):
If that's your definition, is't that a shame?
Speaker 1 (27:04):
My wife was just I'm wrong with everything.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
So I got this.
Speaker 1 (27:09):
Well, John, you relax, me and Matt will go for
the first thirty seconds. Are you ready?
Speaker 3 (27:13):
Matt?
Speaker 7 (27:15):
Yes, sir?
Speaker 1 (27:15):
All right? Oh no, started off. I just remember that
from Friday, the booking word about guilty.
Speaker 6 (27:23):
He said, don't ever let.
Speaker 1 (27:27):
All right, there we go, Here we go, Matt. Word's
dealing with traditional marriage. Start the clock now. The guy
asked the girl, will you blank me Mary?
Speaker 2 (27:38):
Yes? Uh huh?
Speaker 1 (27:39):
A blank gown? She wears a no another another name.
She is the watch, he's the groom, she is the right, right,
So what kind of gown. It's a couple of letters.
It's a couple of letters. Okay, all right, you say
these to each other, you say your bow. Uh huh.
(28:02):
You get married in a clam on the bus. All right,
good deal, So a four on the board.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
All right.
Speaker 1 (28:11):
I'm sorry I never heard him say that, woman, but
thank you for listening for me. Uh so, John Taylor
brand you were ready, John, ready and.
Speaker 7 (28:22):
Go h you invite your friends and blank to your wedding.
Speaker 6 (28:28):
Friends and okay, all right?
Speaker 7 (28:31):
Uh first came love, then came marriage, then came blank
in a blank carriage? Then come these are your mother
and father?
Speaker 1 (28:42):
Are your parents?
Speaker 7 (28:45):
Uh? Huh oh this is when you have an affair,
you've committed an.
Speaker 9 (28:50):
Adultery.
Speaker 6 (28:51):
Yes, oh this is and some I'll be hurt.
Speaker 1 (28:55):
All right, Well you all put a four on the
board to tie it up.
Speaker 9 (29:00):
Four to four?
Speaker 1 (29:01):
All right, time going in around two. Alright, Matt, booking
word a wife would do it?
Speaker 2 (29:08):
That dude?
Speaker 1 (29:09):
You ready, Matt, all right, start the clock. Now, this
is what to set up a wedding like the Royalty
does it and the darlings did it in Mayberry. It's
a blank blank Wow, two words. It's not just a
random you're gonna wed. No, it's like two words like
(29:34):
your parents plan out who you're gonna marry.
Speaker 2 (29:37):
So it's a.
Speaker 1 (29:40):
Yes marriage, yes, yes, all right, and then you have
the wedding blank in the church. The wedding okay, recital,
Oh wow, we only got a one.
Speaker 3 (29:54):
Don't go.
Speaker 1 (29:55):
That was a tough one.
Speaker 7 (29:57):
All right.
Speaker 1 (29:59):
Five on the lord. Well, let's see what John and
Taylor has. That's their obstacle to get to to win
one to tie, all right, he said, ceremony already ready
after the busy way.
Speaker 7 (30:15):
Alright, start the clock now, all right, you hope to
buy one of these with a white picket fence. Oh
hell yeah, Oh you have to go to court and
get a license to make it.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
Blank.
Speaker 6 (30:30):
You win.
Speaker 1 (30:33):
Six to five is what you needed. Matt Dog Yonner
came up a little short, buddy, but you try again.
In time, We'll get Jackie to make that happen. All right,
all right, thank you, all right man, Thank you boy, John,
look at you. I'p good for you playing worthy word
winning a big old prize back from LS tracked. Congratulations.
Speaker 6 (30:53):
Wait, I was in the middle of a sentence, good.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
Morning, got a big show on the radio. Tainter asked
me the bequest. But I hope you understand that this
does not make sense to me.
Speaker 6 (31:09):
I just wrote it down.
Speaker 1 (31:11):
Let me say what you got here, girl, Michael Rakowski.
Michael says, I like to hear Tarmac the Magnificent And
if not, why don't y'all run up an alley and
holler fish respectfully, yours, Michael Rokowski, Crossville, Tennessee.
Speaker 2 (31:26):
L y M.
Speaker 1 (31:27):
I I love you mean it.
Speaker 6 (31:29):
So I'm assuming it must be Andy Griffin.
Speaker 1 (31:32):
Yes it is, Gomer told Barney that when he gave
him a ticket. Barney gave Gomer a ticket for a
legal U turn. Why don't you go now and holler fish?
Speaker 2 (31:42):
Yeah?
Speaker 8 (31:43):
Okay, it loses something when you're out of.
Speaker 11 (31:48):
Well.
Speaker 1 (31:48):
Good job, Michael, World, the same wave, Blue Buddy, you
got it coming up next, Good morning, Big Show's on
(32:18):
the radio. Big Show fan, Mayberry fan, Michael koles get
getting ready to get in the request ready, didn't I
have you look up that we're going with. Tell Barney,
why don't you run up now and holler fish? Because
they used to sell fish.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
Yeah, in the outway, in.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
The alleys between the stores. Everything so going. We wanting
Barney do that. So people think Barney was selling fish.
Speaker 6 (32:41):
Got you got you got, you got.
Speaker 1 (32:47):
That boat.
Speaker 2 (32:49):
We're trying.
Speaker 1 (32:50):
We're trying, Michael. And now, ladies and gentlemen, it's time
once again Fire mysterious visitor from the East, the all seeing,
all knowing, and former holder of a job that's sounding
good but turned out to be terrible. Tarmac the magnificent.
Speaker 13 (33:08):
You know, sometimes this job feels.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
Like any clip back I hold in my hands the
envelopes as a child of four complaintly see these envelopes
are hermetically sealed. They've been kept in a man as
jar with Gary Busey's toothbrush and snoon yesterday. Oh. No
one knows the contents of these envelopes, but you and
your mystical and semiavan Way will ascertain the answers to
(33:31):
these questions, having never before seen the questions. Are you ready?
Speaker 13 (33:35):
Well, I've handled Gary Busey's toothbrush? Apparently so, yes, you.
Speaker 1 (33:39):
Washed up ears? Envelope Number one high Diddley Ho, High,
Diddley Hoe.
Speaker 13 (33:48):
What do you say when you meet a Diddley Holy?
Speaker 14 (33:52):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (33:52):
Right?
Speaker 1 (33:54):
Envelope Number two.
Speaker 13 (33:57):
Decentis? Decentis who bring a to toys on a Christmas morning?
Speaker 1 (34:08):
I've a love? Number three.
Speaker 13 (34:11):
The Baconator, The Baconator, who's the fattest member of the
Justice League?
Speaker 1 (34:21):
Who was giving going ive loove? Number four?
Speaker 13 (34:25):
Moonshiners?
Speaker 1 (34:27):
Moonshiners?
Speaker 13 (34:30):
Who has the worst job at the Bikini Wax Place?
It wasn't my idea, they were already doing it. Number
five The Breakfast Club, The Breakfast Club? What does Fred
Flintstone use to fix the toaster.
Speaker 8 (34:54):
Club?
Speaker 1 (34:56):
Word Ivelope? Number six?
Speaker 13 (35:00):
Pac Man pack Man? What will Tommy Chong do the
day his wife throws him out of the house.
Speaker 1 (35:08):
Man man, all right, I'm a love number seven.
Speaker 13 (35:15):
The Delta variant. The Delta variant describe an airline with
cheap seats, roomy seats, and great food.
Speaker 1 (35:29):
It's a opposite.
Speaker 13 (35:33):
Don't start helping now.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
I'm a love number eight.
Speaker 18 (35:38):
Zippity doo da, zippity doo dah. What do you say
to super Mario when his fly is down? Number nine?
Speaker 13 (35:53):
Cheers?
Speaker 1 (35:54):
Cheers?
Speaker 13 (35:57):
What does Reba McIntyre have around her kitchen table?
Speaker 1 (36:02):
Oh you can do it? The tarback I hold in
my hands the final.
Speaker 13 (36:14):
And nobody's happier about it than me. There you go.
A game of pickleball and ship's creak.
Speaker 1 (36:26):
A game of pickleball and ships creak?
Speaker 13 (36:31):
Name two bad places to be without a paddle.
Speaker 1 (36:36):
Tara, the sun.
Speaker 2 (36:49):
God suck.
Speaker 1 (37:03):
Good morning, and it's a big showing the radio. Y'all
get a chance to check that John Boy and Billy
Facebook page, and him old Buddy Potter says they got
me a new dog. Check out the picture all right
of Potter.
Speaker 6 (37:18):
I will love him at puteam call him.
Speaker 1 (37:21):
Swords nicely, Yoah boy Billy facebook page is what y'all say,
all right fundament box keywords, women, rules, rings up, this
visit with a big guy. It is time for Oliver.
Speaker 17 (37:42):
When when when women nowadays, we try to be patient,
we try to be understanding, but it seems that every
time we laid down a set of rules, the skirts
just don't. Yes, they think we're trying to control them,
(38:03):
when in reality we're trying to help them, because once
they finally learn what we expect of them, the better
off we're all gonna be.
Speaker 2 (38:13):
Well.
Speaker 17 (38:14):
Ladies, you better grab a pen, Tata will have somebody
check your spelling, and get ready to write, because this
is the last time we're going to tell you. And
please note these are all number one because they're all
equally important. Number one, regardless of what you and your
girlfriends assume, men are not mind readers. Number one, learn
(38:40):
to work the toilet seat. If it's up, put it down.
We kneed it up, you kneed it down. You don't
hear us whining about you leaving it down. Put on
your big girl panties and deal with it.
Speaker 1 (38:57):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (38:58):
Sunday sports are like the full moon or the changing tides.
Speaker 2 (39:03):
Just let it be.
Speaker 1 (39:06):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (39:08):
Shopping is not a sport, and no We're never gonna
think of it that way, so forget it. Number one.
If you don't get your own way, don't cry. Crying
is blackmail, but we do get a good laugh out
of it. Number one. Ask for what you want. Let's
(39:32):
be clear on this one. Subtle hints don't work. Strong
hints don't work. Obvious hints don't work.
Speaker 1 (39:40):
Just say it.
Speaker 17 (39:44):
If we wanted to crack a code, we joined the
CIA eenough already.
Speaker 1 (39:52):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (39:54):
Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers to most questions.
Speaker 1 (40:01):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (40:03):
Come to us with a problem only if you want
help solving it. That's what men do. If you want sympathy,
call your girlfriend. Number one. A headache that lasts for
seventeen months is a problem. Either see a doctor or
(40:23):
call an escort service.
Speaker 2 (40:25):
For mean.
Speaker 17 (40:28):
Number one, anything said six months ago is inadmissible in
an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void
after seven days. Shut up, good girl, see she's learning.
Speaker 1 (40:44):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (40:45):
If you won't dress like a Victoria's Secret model, don't
expect us to act like soap opera guys.
Speaker 1 (40:53):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (40:54):
If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask
us unless you're looking for the truth. Yes, I can
see it from here. I would write that one down.
(41:19):
Number one. If something we said can be interpreted two ways,
and one of the ways makes you sad or angry,
we meant the other ones. Number one. You can either
ask us to do something or tell us how you
want it done, not both. If you already know best
(41:41):
how to do it, then do it yourself.
Speaker 2 (41:48):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (41:49):
Whenever possible, please say what you have to say during commercials.
Number one. All men see only sixteen colors. Peach is
a fruit, not a color. Same with pumpkin. We have
(42:10):
no idea what marv is. Number one. Number one. If
you're keeping track, if it itches, we scratch it. That's
how we roll baby.
Speaker 1 (42:28):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (42:29):
If we ask what's wrong and you say nothing, we
will act like nothing's wrong. We know you're lying, but
it's just not worth the hassle. Number one. If you
ask a question you don't really want an answer to,
expect an answer you don't really want to hear.
Speaker 2 (42:46):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (42:48):
When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you want
to wear is fine.
Speaker 3 (42:52):
Really.
Speaker 1 (42:54):
Number one.
Speaker 17 (42:55):
Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you're prepared
to discuss topics like baseball, handgun safety or pawn and
number one you have enough clothes, you have too many shoes,
and I am in shape. Round is a shape. Thank
(43:18):
you for listening. Yes, I know I have to sleep
on the couch tonight, but you know what I like it.
It's like camping.
Speaker 13 (43:31):
That's how we roll.
Speaker 1 (43:32):
Baby big boxes.
Speaker 11 (43:36):
Here all your favorites from four decades of The Big
Show ninety nine since each fifteen for nine ninety nine.
Speaker 13 (43:40):
Buy them once, play them anywhere.
Speaker 9 (43:42):
You can shop the mid Box online right now at
the Big Show dot Com. Order a Big Show step
I phone. The number is eight hundred and four to
seven one Stuff online services by Animate dot Com.
Speaker 1 (43:51):
Have you missed any of The Big Show this morning?
You can hear it now. The John bore Milling Late
Risers podcast up next. Wherever you get your podcast, make
it easy. Subscribe to us with a free I Heeart
radio app. I Love You mean It
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Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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