October 17, 2024 • 40 mins
Thursday (pt 1 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, Halloween is coming up, so you know there’s big doings over at Tacky Jackie’s.. - Part-time receptionist Phil McCracken “mans” the phones for Babs.. - Gary Busey is fresh back from his trip to Thailand - we’ll find out how it went as he updates his diary.. - Doug Rice covers NASCAR’s playoffs as the boys head out to Vegas.. - He fill a request for a John Boy & Billy Playhouse featuring James Gregory and Killer Beaz.. - and we’ll finish up with a deer hunting trip with Cadbury…
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Good more than everybody more big show to come. Hang
where you are, yo?
Speaker 2 (00:04):
What's up?
Speaker 3 (00:07):
This is Nike and for all of five one one
you need on all things redneck. Just check out my
two favorite crackers, John bro and Bitley right here on
the Big Show. I listened to something else my own self,
but white boy Patrick Dunn broke off the.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
Knob in the Cadillac. Never mind, pets out.
Speaker 4 (01:06):
Let's get up and get at it.
Speaker 5 (01:08):
It is Thursday, October seventeenth, twenty twenty four.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
Look at this.
Speaker 5 (01:12):
Wide away crew we have in here. Nor good morning morning.
What's happening is October seventeenth. There's National Mulligan Days.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Perfect is that a do overs?
Speaker 5 (01:31):
A do over?
Speaker 1 (01:32):
And not only on the.
Speaker 5 (01:34):
Golf course, but in life? This national pasta day not
only on the golf course, but no, do worry National
Edge Day?
Speaker 1 (01:47):
What edge?
Speaker 6 (01:48):
Well?
Speaker 5 (01:48):
This day promotes a movement of youth refraining from using alcohol,
tobacco and other recreational drugs. That's a good idea to
get new, get your edge, keep.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
Your edge all right? I think it's refrained.
Speaker 7 (02:03):
Yeah, refrain when I say something similar.
Speaker 8 (02:07):
Information I could have used thirty years ago.
Speaker 5 (02:10):
Yah, you gotta find out he was, what about national
get smart about credit day information I could use. Let
me get a chance to go ahead and do something
with that. We got three days in history, and it's
gonna be very important, Like we're of one hundred and
twenty dollars. You already wait, you might be ready to play. Uh,
(02:34):
we'll get you ready to set up were wait?
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Big Shoe was on the.
Speaker 5 (02:38):
Radio, Good morning, got the Big Show on the radio. Alright,
let's get that first prize package out? Went so great
rehearsal Tyner. What we got for him? First thing this morning.
Speaker 8 (02:53):
First thing this morning, Johnny, one dollars worth of bull
snack cleaning products.
Speaker 6 (02:59):
I can't be.
Speaker 8 (03:01):
Cant be sexy and literate. Bull snot cleaning products made
in the USA. Truck drivers keep America moving and bull
snock make sure they look good doing it. Who's this
chick talking behind me? Look for bull snotted truck stops
across America or download the bull snot out.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
Close that curtain. It's a sleeper. Ooh.
Speaker 8 (03:23):
Go to the Big Show dot com and click on
the bull snot btner.
Speaker 6 (03:28):
More information, good truck?
Speaker 1 (03:30):
Who is this hussy?
Speaker 4 (03:34):
All right?
Speaker 5 (03:34):
Now, well, let's look at three dates in the history
where we'll get our categories for you to scar the
bull snock it is eighteen twenty four. On October seventeenth,
boarding housekeepers in New York, responding to the high cost
of living, voted to serve boarder's only four prunes each
(03:56):
for breakfast. Prune this place is like a prison. Move
up to nineteen ninety nine. Armed bandits trying to hold
up a car at SiO Polo, Brazil at the traffic
light back down. When they recognized soccer star pile Pele
sitting in the back seat, the two thieves lowered their pistols,
(04:21):
apologized and walked away.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
You know it was with him Terry Hanson.
Speaker 5 (04:27):
That hopolong suit on Hayle did come in in he
fire boy Hanson before that happens all right.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
Twenty eighteen.
Speaker 5 (04:37):
Big Bird and Oscar the Grouch puppeteer Carol Spinney left
Sesame straight after fifty years. Spendy once said in an
interview with CBS Evening News he would love to play
Big Bird for even fifty years. His apprentice Matt Vogel.
When I'll take over the role. Eric Jacobson will perform
the role of Oscar the Grouch happily retired.
Speaker 8 (05:00):
It took two men to fill his shoes.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
How about that hasn't didn't have anything to do with it.
Speaker 5 (05:06):
Hanson does look like one of the old men in
the balcony.
Speaker 1 (05:12):
Tell me he looks like a grumpy man.
Speaker 7 (05:14):
That that puppet that Jeff Dunham has Walter.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
Only when he's looking at the computer.
Speaker 5 (05:21):
Right, Well, you look at that picture. Finally, handsOn would pay.
He was a good looking rassal back into other day.
That's how he got Patty. Oh yeah, taking'd have done
it these days, your little gorgeous all right, so let's say,
oh yeah, all right, we're good.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
There's a three categores.
Speaker 9 (05:39):
We did it.
Speaker 5 (05:40):
One eight hundred big shows. You're told for line across America.
We play out birds next, Good morning, this big Shaw
(06:10):
on the radio for you, Thursday, October the seventeenth, and man,
oh this is the time.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
But Randy, you were supposed to Uh oops, I was wrong.
Speaker 7 (06:19):
I gotta go.
Speaker 5 (06:20):
We ain't gonna let you forget that you were wrong.
And a listener called Jaggie at the big show one
eight hundred big show, you can leave us messages comes
in handy.
Speaker 8 (06:33):
Randy was wrong.
Speaker 1 (06:34):
Line, we were talking about Sears, and so what happened?
Speaker 9 (06:39):
What was it?
Speaker 2 (06:40):
New?
Speaker 7 (06:41):
It was something about Seers filed for bankruptcy and I
mentioned that and gone are my favorite tools Craftsmen tools
gone with lifetime warranty and all that.
Speaker 5 (06:50):
Uh huh.
Speaker 7 (06:51):
Well, I had an experience where I went and I
saw they were selling Craftsman. Okay, we don't want to
know what would happen. I'm just I'm trying to Okay,
all right, trunk cake, so simplify, man, I'd be done now.
So in order to you can get a lifetime warranty
on the tools, but you've really got to go through
(07:12):
the company, through Craftsmen at Craftsman dot com.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Because that's Randy admitting he was wrong.
Speaker 7 (07:17):
Now, well, I'm just saying at Low's you can't necessarily
exchange it because they may not have that exact tool
in stock.
Speaker 8 (07:26):
And that's what the caller was saying, is that they
are available at Low's with a warranty.
Speaker 5 (07:31):
Okay, So Reddy said that they god was a lifetime warranty.
The listener said, they do have a lifetime warranty. Yeah,
not all of them, but not all of them, but
some of them. So you're mostly wrong, then sure.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
I mean I love look, I love the fact that
the guy correct me because now I know because I had.
Speaker 7 (07:49):
A problem where I took a tool in and tried
to exchange it and they said they couldn't.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
Okay, So that's what you were buising.
Speaker 5 (07:55):
Your life experience is off of That's what I was
trying to say when I was doing it.
Speaker 6 (08:00):
Jackie color back, it's almost working ups. Let's play up theers.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
It's the game that anyone can be.
Speaker 9 (08:11):
John Boyd kill the buses from the big guys.
Speaker 4 (08:16):
Play let's go contested number one.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
This should really be a lot of fun when you're
playing uppers. Have a hurry up and guest time, you
have the best time. You have a big shot. Let's
say hey to Bobby from Columbus, Georgia, we have a shot.
Speaker 6 (08:45):
Today.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
All right, we want away.
Speaker 5 (08:52):
Good morning, Bobby, Good morning. All right, buddy, let's jump
right in here. Get you through these three categories. All right,
give us hit it. Three things served at breakfast, ready
to go, e to ma'am. Give us three things in
(09:12):
the back seat of cars, ready to go.
Speaker 4 (09:17):
Little kids, coper seat and grocery.
Speaker 5 (09:20):
Hale right for the win. Three characters from Sesame Street
ready go.
Speaker 10 (09:29):
No hold big Birden Ernie, alright.
Speaker 5 (09:33):
Ernie for the win baby from Columbus one twenty dollars
worth of Ball's not cleaning products coming you away, Buddie.
Thank you, Buddy, I appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
Guys, all right the man hang on with jacket.
Speaker 5 (09:53):
Bott the money I wor tomb are your news right
on the other side of time capsule to.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Get a early I have on Thursday.
Speaker 11 (10:32):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 9 (10:47):
Hey begging this, Here's Mondo Swisher reporting live from talking
about the sponsors my post twenty eight thousand, four hundred
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or sweets the ten little cigar with a great, big
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(11:08):
to myself for the next four years. I'm calling in
today from the quaint Sermo Croatian village of Kalishnikov. As
most of you folks know, this is a troubled part
of the world. In fact, Beggin I was exploring a
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(11:29):
and five hundred dollars worth of on air mention. Thank goodness,
I was able to steady my nerves with a tall
glass of jack it Off vodka. Remember if you can't
shake it off, jack it Off. I'm pleased to have
a special guest with me today, his honor, the Mayor
of Kalishnikov, mister Boris Halichev. By the way, today's interview
(11:50):
is sponsored by the tough New Dodge Ram, the mayor
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audience a feel for the situation here in Kalishnikov. Tell
us about the roveing bands of ethnic cleansing warlords still
roving the cobblestone streets of this picturesque little corner of
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(12:12):
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Speaker 12 (12:24):
To us, Thank you well.
Speaker 9 (12:30):
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Speaker 12 (12:43):
Mister Mayor, thank you very much, mister Swisha, Good morning,
John Boy and beauty, and hello to all of your
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Speaker 12 (13:09):
Hold on, uh, yes, I forgot where it was? Where
was I?
Speaker 9 (13:16):
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figuring out where you are if you had the official
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(13:36):
may take you.
Speaker 12 (13:39):
Yes, I thank you. That is a very nice unit day,
isn't it?
Speaker 9 (13:43):
And speaking a nice unit in you Stateside fans, I'm
looking for some excitement. Next time you're in the Grand
Strand area, South Carolina, be sure to stop in at
Tattle Tales two, home of Chesty McDonald, located just a
half mile north of Barefoot Landing on Highway seventeen in
North myrtle By Shop.
Speaker 12 (14:01):
Yes, do you really want to talk to me or not?
Speaker 9 (14:06):
I'd love to, mister Mayor, but unfortunately we're on a
time and speaking of time, thanks to our sponsor time X,
check out the newest member of the time X Expedition collection,
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(14:29):
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Bottomless Bucket of root Beer and love is always So
My Mama, Mabel And hello to Ben. Doone and film
(14:50):
a cracking from Belfast, Northern Ireland to listen to my
talk about the sponsor updates and streaming audio from my
website dot com. Mombo Swisher talking about myself. How do
you feel love you Big.
Speaker 13 (15:08):
Sean Boy and Billy Way the way the Beach's played, John,
you're seeing how much Eld's wade?
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Where that is?
Speaker 5 (15:23):
Good morning radio, dumb right, Thursday morning Big shows on
(15:53):
the radio. Well, it's always a big thrill for us
when our next guests stops by. He is a true
living legend of the silver screen. Please welcome back, Sir
Alan Swan.
Speaker 14 (16:04):
Can the chatter Lieutenant fill that cannon with pastry and
keep firing until Countermandon is me. John Boy, your work
is done here, son, save yourself before these corpulent wenches
preach the barricade.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
Oh no, no, you're on the big show.
Speaker 6 (16:20):
Oh good heavens. I was flashing back to a film
I did in the sixties, Attack of the Full Figure Goals,
directed by Marty de Berghie. I heard of gigantic atomic
age house frows eating everything in their path. It was
like the green room at the View heard of that one.
(16:41):
It was blackballed by the body positive crowd. A shame. Really.
One of my best performances.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
Well, you always look to be in such great shape.
Have you always been so athletic?
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Oh?
Speaker 6 (16:52):
Not always. As a young man, I was remarkably plump.
I blame my mother. All that rich food was good cook. No,
she stole from the rich family. She worked for the
rest of the neighborhood was starving while I was budding
breasts like Sydney Sweeney.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
How did you beat it?
Speaker 6 (17:11):
Great question, you know, John Boyne. This was before everyone
had the latest, greatest cure for obesity. The methods were
much more primitive. Shall we say, Well, I'd love to
hear about that as you wish. There was a chap
in Middlington that had a guaranteed weight loss plan. There
were three options five quid, twenty quid fifty quid. Not
(17:32):
having much disposable income, I chose the five quid plan.
I took a shower and was shown to a large sauna. There,
sitting naked in a chair was the most beautiful woman
I'd ever seen, and she said, if you catch me,
you can make love to me. Now, being young, I
needed no encouragement. I pursued her with vigor, and just
(17:53):
as I was about to take her in my arms,
the time limit ran out o steaks spot, I had
lost an incredible ten pounds. I was sate delighted. I
returned the next day to purchase the next level plan
for twenty quid. As the day before, I took a
shower and was shown into an even bigger sauna. There
I beheld a statuesque redhead stark, naked except for a
(18:18):
pair of high heels. She said, if you catch me,
you can make love to me.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
Lover. Really, I assure you, my boy.
Speaker 6 (18:26):
My loins were ablaze, but even harbled by high heels,
the object of my affection was able to elude capture
before my time ran out. But this time I lost
a glance over fifteen pounds. I was sold. I returned
the next day fifty quid in hand, with a steely
commitment to succeeding this time around. Again, I took a shower,
(18:48):
was shown into an even larger sauna.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
What was a woman like this time?
Speaker 4 (18:52):
Well?
Speaker 6 (18:53):
I glanced around the room, fanning the steam with my hand,
searching for the fair maiden. I was alone, at least
I was for a moment. A large panel slid aside
and a full grown silver black mountain gorilla stomped into
the room. He wore a sign that said if I
catch you, I can make love to you. Is at
(19:16):
the end of the story, not exactly. I was never
overweight after that, and every year I get a Christmas
card from the Gorilla.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Counts.
Speaker 6 (19:27):
Indeed, now, if you don't mind, Senor Bomber, Telly has
arranged an assignation with a fair maiden named Jenny Craig.
Speaker 5 (19:35):
You, dear friends, ladies and gentlemen, Sir Alan Swan, the
world's greatest doctor.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
I'm not an actor, damn you.
Speaker 6 (19:44):
I'm a movie star.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
It's a big show on the radio. I can't be
read this all right, sir, I'll read it.
Speaker 15 (19:54):
Good morning, This is Nigel Cadbury, Master Boys, faithful gentleman, gentlemen,
and you're listening to Master Boy and young Sir William
on the Big Show. It's my responsibility to make sure
that Master Boy gets up and gets to work on time,
so when he's laid it's my fault.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
So sad, I feel so.
Speaker 6 (20:53):
Good morning.
Speaker 5 (20:55):
It's to make Shaw on the radio for your Thursday,
October seventeen, Thanks show buzz Lo, Sol Tavern South ends
best sports bar hand Seana North Carolina me and bring
your dog and watch them football on the outdoor patio.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
You got some game we're about. The NFL Action is
tonight Denver at New Orleans.
Speaker 5 (21:17):
A good old spicy food teble peetelu.
Speaker 6 (21:22):
Load Yi.
Speaker 5 (21:24):
Ain't making Loso Tavern for Saturday brunch ten to two pm.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
Got a new Bloodberry Bar brunch as well.
Speaker 5 (21:31):
Oki Don't go Boys, Tracky Dackys, Oh god, I was close.
Tracky Dakis, Tacky drakis. All right, I'm gonna practice because
it's coming up in minutes. All right, Big Show rolls.
Speaker 6 (21:45):
On Good Morning.
Speaker 5 (21:49):
Big Show's on the radio head toward Halloween here on
this October seventeenth.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Tacky Dracky's in minutes.
Speaker 6 (21:54):
I got it.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
Nice.
Speaker 5 (21:55):
Let me tell you about that prize pack you can
win on John Boy Jeopardy. A hat, it's a t shirt,
it's a tumbler, and it's a twenty five dollars gas
card that you can use to fill up your brand
new custom motorcycle, the Big Show Motorcycle from Lord Tigers.
We've already got two finalists drawn. Make sure you get
your name in the hat before next week. We got
(22:17):
three more finalists to draw, so you still got time
to get your name in the hat. Whenness Brazebag hang out,
we'll play four ten minutes.
Speaker 10 (22:26):
Hello friends, you're old pell Bertford here for Tacky Jackie's
close for hose. It's that time of year, neighbors. The
leaves have changed, the days are shorter, Tampa Bay already sucks,
and soon the ghosts and cools in the living den
we'll be roaming the streets, knocking on your door and
begging for handouts. No, it's not free roaming democrats. It's
just Halloween, and what better way to celebrate thanksgivings? Ugly Nephew,
(22:47):
finish shopping the big Tacky Jackie Scanctacular Halloween Sale. Don't
settle for another stale and boring Halloween. Let Tacky Jackie
help you put the whore back in horror. Do you
(23:10):
want to look like your favorite celebrity skeezer but can't
afford the botox?
Speaker 1 (23:14):
Yeah, well you're in luck.
Speaker 10 (23:16):
Tacky Jackies has a complete line of high quality masks
from Icky Dickies of Greater Bayoned.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
Everyone loves Iggy Dicky.
Speaker 10 (23:27):
This Halloween. You just can't lose in Tacky Jackie's clothes
for Hose choose from a variety of famous fabulous faces
turned fearsome through botched plastic surgery.
Speaker 4 (23:36):
A lie, It's a lie.
Speaker 10 (23:40):
It We've got Donna, Tella Versacci, Meg Ryan's Share, Terry Hatchard,
Data Monil, Priscilla Presley, Daryl Hannah, Jennis Dickinson, Little Kim,
Suzanne Summers, Joan Bennark, the blond Midget from Little Ladies
of La and the one that's either Lucille Ball or
Paul Stanley from Kim and Our Time Umber one bestseller
(24:01):
from two thousand and seven is backed by a popular demand.
The hill Raiser everyone's favorite political pin and will give everyone.
Speaker 1 (24:09):
Chilleries when you wear this.
Speaker 10 (24:11):
Hillary comes with prison straight pantsuit, tankles not included.
Speaker 4 (24:15):
What difference at this point does it make?
Speaker 6 (24:18):
And how are you a daytime TV junkie?
Speaker 10 (24:21):
Do you and your postmenoposal pals want to go out
as the crew from the View? Sorry, we don't have
the rights to those masks, but we've got the next
best thing. Want to go as Joy behar put on
the rem and beaver Mask?
Speaker 1 (24:38):
Want to be Barbara Walters?
Speaker 10 (24:40):
Go with the shrunken head guy from Beetlejuice And if
Whopopy Goldberg is your choice. Put a little lipstick on
the Predator and voila. You're good to go as those
jabber and hos. But if sweets hurt your treat and
(25:01):
you're more of a trick, We've got the outfits to
put the don one in your favorite John. Exclusive from
Full Figure Freddy's House of Heifers comes our super absorbent
line of lingerie featuring the Sweaty Teddy. If you're pleasingly pumping'
like to shake that rump, but don't like leaving dribbles
on the dance floor, put on a sweaty Teddy and
boogie your booty. The Sweaty Teddy can hold up the
(25:23):
seven gallons of perspiration. It's also a sexy replacement for
those bulk he depends your friends, we'll all.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
Say shamp wow.
Speaker 10 (25:31):
All the camera guy say, princess, how's that bust line?
Do people boo your boobs can't call your cans? He
haul your hooters. Well, here's your chance to get even.
Right now, We've got fifty percent off all our googly
eye novel ye Ross from Juggie and Juggie of Beverly Hills.
Speaker 6 (25:49):
All bras are.
Speaker 10 (25:49):
Printed with an assortment of creepy monster eyeballs. Turn your
double deed disasters into three D dynamos, take your shirt
off and scare their pants off.
Speaker 1 (26:03):
Stop and you can only get them at.
Speaker 10 (26:06):
Tacky Jackie's Clothes for Hose and the Big skank Tecular
Holloween Sale.
Speaker 1 (26:10):
You're so many fifty Big Tacky Jackies.
Speaker 10 (26:16):
Your one stop shop, drop and rack and roll this Halloween.
Choose from our fast array of sketchy discount costumes from
the nereal Vineys of Venice Beach. We've got the Wolfman,
the Wolf Girl, Frankenstein Frankenberg, the Invisible Man Girl, Creature
from the Black Neighborhood Venom of the Fadsburger, the Muhlman,
the Freckleman, the pupil Man, Count Dracula, No Count Dracula,
the Mummy, the Dummy, the Rummy, the Hunchback of Notre Dames,
(26:36):
the Halfwood of That States, the fat Back of Clemson
and King Wongs, the incredibly well and down Asian Giant Gorilla,
all on sale now at Tacky Jackies Clothes for Hose.
And we've got scary special guests to entertain and terrify
the whole family. Hey, Hey, hey, crackhead, Kelly Kohagen will
be matting the snaggletooth kissing booth. Will you be the
(26:58):
first to successfully kiss around those guy Hi Herpes he
Man Loretta Lamprey, the hiccky hicck. We'll be dishing out
the purple neck nirples on Friday and Saturday, or until
her suction gives out. Get your put down to where
the prices are cut down. That tacky Jackie's close for
(27:19):
hose Go three miles down two mile road. Take the
fork in the road to the greasy spoon part behind
hefty heinees plus sized porta potties pen, follow the ear
splitting shrieks to tacky Jackies. Close for hose Figs Gang
tagular Halloween sales, and don't forget get another ten percent
off when you sing our jingle. This is your old
(27:46):
pal burtburn saying I'll see you there.
Speaker 15 (27:54):
Going on.
Speaker 5 (27:55):
That didn't work all right? Well, let's play John Board
Jumping Ay review Yesterday. Question we found out. According to
Stephen Tyler, the title for Aerosmith's Walk This Way was
taken from a line in this mel Brooks comedy.
Speaker 8 (28:09):
Is Young Frankenstein.
Speaker 5 (28:11):
Yeah, igors. Today's John Boyjeffardy. Sound designer Ben Bert created
the sounds made by this robotic Hollywood icon by whistling
and making fart noises into an old tape recorder and
then speeding up the recording.
Speaker 6 (28:30):
Oh who is Joe Biden?
Speaker 1 (28:35):
Good guess.
Speaker 5 (28:38):
One big show you told free line? Yeah no, don't
let me think about it. We play John Boydgeffarty next,
(29:12):
Good Morning. That's a big show on the radio World.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
It to your Thursday Today's featuring track for the Big
Show bit Box Cadbury goes deer Honey.
Speaker 5 (29:21):
There's your keywords, deer honey, hit the bit box, Hit
the Big Show dot COM's brought you by Lord Tiger's
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the custom Big Show Motorcycle.
Speaker 1 (29:31):
Big Show Bike dot Com. There right now, that's why
yell slive across America.
Speaker 7 (29:38):
It's John Boy, Jeffy and now a man who has
absolutely made a career out of whistling and making fart
noises into old tape recorders.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Here he is. It's Don Boyd.
Speaker 4 (29:53):
That's bike up.
Speaker 1 (29:56):
As I had Gary out of Mitchell, Tennessee Gary.
Speaker 4 (30:01):
Good morning, then boy.
Speaker 5 (30:03):
Hello body welcome in here. Well, Gary, the thing you
were you were fast this morning. You got the first
shot at John Boy Jeopardy.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
Do you feel it?
Speaker 4 (30:15):
All right?
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Well that's a review to question here for those just
joining us.
Speaker 5 (30:19):
Sound as uner Ben Bird created the sounds made by
this robotic Hollywood icon by whistling and making fart noises
into an old tape recorder and then speeding up the recording.
What you got, Gary, he's a little short fat dude.
Speaker 4 (30:39):
R D you say, little R two D two?
Speaker 1 (30:45):
Well you nailed again that all right? That is pretty
wild now I'm thinking about it. Yeah, I got it.
Speaker 5 (30:58):
Hey, Gary, I was on here a year ago as
my wife had just pasted what forty years we were together?
Speaker 7 (31:07):
Man?
Speaker 1 (31:07):
Well, Gary was sorry to hear that. Buddy. I'm glad.
I'm glad you're out there.
Speaker 4 (31:12):
Man, you hang on, Thank you young.
Speaker 1 (31:14):
All right, buddy, alright, let's jump out and catch you
up on your news.
Speaker 16 (31:25):
Let us play in about twenty minutes, Gary Busey, alright,
then a minute, this will be showing the radios.
Speaker 5 (32:08):
John bonbell A grilling sauce su mission out, Old Carla
Cook's gonna be with our boy, Kevin Sporting Gayton and grilling.
There's during the Bama Tailgate Show every Saturday during the
season on YouTube. It'll drop three p m. John bo
Miiller problems, Kannaka Sausage featured this week. Carl's Kannaca crack Crackers,
(32:31):
c Love Crackers prayed very lightly with Doug fat and
the light sprinkled. John Bore Billy pork crub. Then the
then slice and knet of sausage. Stopped that with a
thinly sliced piece of high a pino pepper. Small drama.
John Bone Milla Hot Spicy grilling sauce. Cook one, you
preheat the grill three fifty thirty minutes of bak, you
slap yourself and so good.
Speaker 1 (32:52):
Jack it down. Bama Tailgate Show YouTube This Saturday, John.
Speaker 5 (32:56):
Boone Billy Grilling Sauce. Wow, good morning, that's a big
(33:24):
show on the radio.
Speaker 6 (33:25):
There we go.
Speaker 1 (33:27):
It's time for the Diary of Carrie Beausey.
Speaker 5 (33:32):
Dear Diary, this is Gary.
Speaker 6 (33:36):
Beauty.
Speaker 11 (33:39):
I've been pushing myself hardlyly, Diary. I'm stiff and sore
like it ain't never been before. It's got to the
point now that when I tell people I do my
own son. So I'm actually referring to going to the
toilet by myself. I spent my professional life being good
to everyone else.
Speaker 6 (33:56):
Now it was time to be good to me. Bought
a first class ticket to tie lamb Old Gary is
taking the Massagi tour.
Speaker 1 (34:06):
Rub me left, Rub me right.
Speaker 6 (34:10):
My butt cheeks feel a bit too tight.
Speaker 11 (34:14):
Stick them thumbs in there, and don't go light.
Speaker 6 (34:18):
I need a massage to night.
Speaker 11 (34:21):
Rub it up, dub where's a hot tub? The play
right over was the treat Diary. Little tie gals no
bigger than a minute waiting on me hand and foot.
I gotta tell you, Diary, these darlings ain't got much
meat on them. They gotta wear dresses because they got
no ash to hold their slacks up. Nothing to brag
(34:42):
about a pop neither are they all like this? Old
Garrett needs a thick, strong woman to work out these
beaucy kinks. I was starting to get a bad feeling
about this.
Speaker 1 (34:54):
Where's your boobies? Where's you bought?
Speaker 2 (34:56):
You?
Speaker 6 (34:56):
Twiggy chicks don't make the cut. Need a Gallon's got
some beef to give bag gar some true relief. May
got to the hotel nice place rooms, got a bedet
shiny honey.
Speaker 5 (35:12):
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 11 (35:16):
Barely got my grip unpacked, and there's a knock at
the door. Ready for my first massage experience. At least
I thought I was ready. The car stopped in front
of some rude side zoo. What fresh hell was this
supposed to be? But help, I bought the package, I
might as well go with the flow. The first thing
they did was take me out to lay in some
(35:37):
big corral.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Before I know it, here.
Speaker 11 (35:39):
Comes a bunch of goats. They commenced the climbing on
me like a birch log, bouncing and a hopping with
them tiny whos. Kind of reminded me of the weekend
I spent with a couple of gals who was little people.
Speaker 5 (35:51):
Yea, yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 11 (35:53):
Both experience were relaxing, but for different reasons. Then here
comes this damn elephant, an elephant man. They bring this
big thing over and it raises up its foot, and
I just knew that this was the end. I had
the same feeling when I got hammered and challenged Rosie
(36:13):
o'donald of a wrestling match, But it was actually all right.
She is real gentle the elephant, not Rosy and the
last massage of the day was a facial. They put
on some of that chingy Chongi music and gave me
some weird tea to drink. Next thing I know, they
got my face covered with snails.
Speaker 6 (36:34):
I got slimed trunks and hooves, and slimy snails got
me thinking, what the hell is this a dream or somemmarage?
Speaker 1 (36:41):
All I want was the damn massage.
Speaker 11 (36:44):
All the next day was more of the same, wooden millets, cactus,
hot rocks.
Speaker 6 (36:54):
I finally just took to the streets on my own.
There's a big old redheaded gal washing her ox. I
asked her where could I get a good massage, and
she winked at me and took me inside.
Speaker 11 (37:03):
Now before I could shuck my duds, she stripped me,
naked her own self like a monkey, peeling a nanner.
She rubbed me long and hard, and it was glorious.
Then the moment I was waiting for. She offered me
a happy ending, But in their language, it's twenty percent
off the next visit.
Speaker 6 (37:24):
Hey, there's sweet cheeks. I ain't no rookie. All I
want is that fortune cookie. Don't send me home. We
come too far. Nothing worse than a horny.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
Gar off off yop.
Speaker 11 (37:37):
Well Diary, I gotta ski daddle. I challenged Rosie o'donald
to her best two out of three falls. Damn, I
miss that elephant. Until next time.
Speaker 1 (37:50):
EXAs and holes. Yeah no, Mucie, Good morning, No big
shows on a.
Speaker 17 (38:02):
Well well, well, you've obviously got nothing better to do,
or maybe you're just not smart enough to change the dial.
Whatever the reason, you're listening to John Boy and Billy
on the Big Show. Aunt, they won that.
Speaker 4 (38:23):
H Good morning, and it's a big shaw the radio.
Speaker 5 (38:57):
My man Dog Ris gonna head out for Vegas for
his last call. How about that man season flown by?
We got dugging coming up. It's just a couple of minutes. Hey,
I'm not gonna wait till the whole edition of Dumb
Crook News for this dumb crook story we got so
these people, they ain't only dumb crooks, they're dumb business people.
(39:20):
So a couple in Louisiana was arrested after their vehicle
was repossessed and drugs and gun was found inside. Then
it wasn't a personal stash. Detectives found more than nine
pounds of pot eighteen grams of mushrooms, ecstasy pills, packaging
materials for street drug distribution, and a semi automatic handgun.
(39:45):
They were arrested when they showed up at the storage
yard to retrieve their personal belongings.
Speaker 1 (39:51):
You know, you really don't have to go with us.
If you just point out where the car is, we'll
be happy to get that.
Speaker 5 (39:58):
They're facing multiple drug and gun related charges, which they
should not. Only did they blow their car payment money
to make a car payments. I didn't get it on
the streets quick enough. It couldn't happen to a nicer couple.
I'm guessing on that right there, dumb crooks. All right,
(40:18):
good work, I'll keep it up all right. When we
got here, Doug Rice. In minutes, big show rolls on.
Good more than everybody more big show to come. Hang
where you are, yo?
Speaker 2 (00:04):
What's up?
Speaker 3 (00:07):
This is Nike and for all of five one one
you need on all things redneck. Just check out my
two favorite crackers, John bro and Bitley right here on
the Big Show. I listened to something else my own self,
but white boy Patrick Dunn broke off the.
Speaker 2 (00:24):
Knob in the Cadillac. Never mind, pets out.
Speaker 4 (01:06):
Let's get up and get at it.
Speaker 5 (01:08):
It is Thursday, October seventeenth, twenty twenty four.
Speaker 1 (01:12):
Look at this.
Speaker 5 (01:12):
Wide away crew we have in here. Nor good morning morning.
What's happening is October seventeenth. There's National Mulligan Days.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Perfect is that a do overs?
Speaker 5 (01:31):
A do over?
Speaker 1 (01:32):
And not only on the.
Speaker 5 (01:34):
Golf course, but in life? This national pasta day not
only on the golf course, but no, do worry National
Edge Day?
Speaker 1 (01:47):
What edge?
Speaker 6 (01:48):
Well?
Speaker 5 (01:48):
This day promotes a movement of youth refraining from using alcohol,
tobacco and other recreational drugs. That's a good idea to
get new, get your edge, keep.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
Your edge all right? I think it's refrained.
Speaker 7 (02:03):
Yeah, refrain when I say something similar.
Speaker 8 (02:07):
Information I could have used thirty years ago.
Speaker 5 (02:10):
Yah, you gotta find out he was, what about national
get smart about credit day information I could use. Let
me get a chance to go ahead and do something
with that. We got three days in history, and it's
gonna be very important, Like we're of one hundred and
twenty dollars. You already wait, you might be ready to play. Uh,
(02:34):
we'll get you ready to set up were wait?
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Big Shoe was on the.
Speaker 5 (02:38):
Radio, Good morning, got the Big Show on the radio. Alright,
let's get that first prize package out? Went so great
rehearsal Tyner. What we got for him? First thing this morning.
Speaker 8 (02:53):
First thing this morning, Johnny, one dollars worth of bull
snack cleaning products.
Speaker 6 (02:59):
I can't be.
Speaker 8 (03:01):
Cant be sexy and literate. Bull snot cleaning products made
in the USA. Truck drivers keep America moving and bull
snock make sure they look good doing it. Who's this
chick talking behind me? Look for bull snotted truck stops
across America or download the bull snot out.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
Close that curtain. It's a sleeper. Ooh.
Speaker 8 (03:23):
Go to the Big Show dot com and click on
the bull snot btner.
Speaker 6 (03:28):
More information, good truck?
Speaker 1 (03:30):
Who is this hussy?
Speaker 4 (03:34):
All right?
Speaker 5 (03:34):
Now, well, let's look at three dates in the history
where we'll get our categories for you to scar the
bull snock it is eighteen twenty four. On October seventeenth,
boarding housekeepers in New York, responding to the high cost
of living, voted to serve boarder's only four prunes each
(03:56):
for breakfast. Prune this place is like a prison. Move
up to nineteen ninety nine. Armed bandits trying to hold
up a car at SiO Polo, Brazil at the traffic
light back down. When they recognized soccer star pile Pele
sitting in the back seat, the two thieves lowered their pistols,
(04:21):
apologized and walked away.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
You know it was with him Terry Hanson.
Speaker 5 (04:27):
That hopolong suit on Hayle did come in in he
fire boy Hanson before that happens all right.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
Twenty eighteen.
Speaker 5 (04:37):
Big Bird and Oscar the Grouch puppeteer Carol Spinney left
Sesame straight after fifty years. Spendy once said in an
interview with CBS Evening News he would love to play
Big Bird for even fifty years. His apprentice Matt Vogel.
When I'll take over the role. Eric Jacobson will perform
the role of Oscar the Grouch happily retired.
Speaker 8 (05:00):
It took two men to fill his shoes.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
How about that hasn't didn't have anything to do with it.
Speaker 5 (05:06):
Hanson does look like one of the old men in
the balcony.
Speaker 1 (05:12):
Tell me he looks like a grumpy man.
Speaker 7 (05:14):
That that puppet that Jeff Dunham has Walter.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
Only when he's looking at the computer.
Speaker 5 (05:21):
Right, Well, you look at that picture. Finally, handsOn would pay.
He was a good looking rassal back into other day.
That's how he got Patty. Oh yeah, taking'd have done
it these days, your little gorgeous all right, so let's say,
oh yeah, all right, we're good.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
There's a three categores.
Speaker 9 (05:39):
We did it.
Speaker 5 (05:40):
One eight hundred big shows. You're told for line across America.
We play out birds next, Good morning, this big Shaw
(06:10):
on the radio for you, Thursday, October the seventeenth, and man,
oh this is the time.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
But Randy, you were supposed to Uh oops, I was wrong.
Speaker 7 (06:19):
I gotta go.
Speaker 5 (06:20):
We ain't gonna let you forget that you were wrong.
And a listener called Jaggie at the big show one
eight hundred big show, you can leave us messages comes
in handy.
Speaker 8 (06:33):
Randy was wrong.
Speaker 1 (06:34):
Line, we were talking about Sears, and so what happened?
Speaker 9 (06:39):
What was it?
Speaker 2 (06:40):
New?
Speaker 7 (06:41):
It was something about Seers filed for bankruptcy and I
mentioned that and gone are my favorite tools Craftsmen tools
gone with lifetime warranty and all that.
Speaker 5 (06:50):
Uh huh.
Speaker 7 (06:51):
Well, I had an experience where I went and I
saw they were selling Craftsman. Okay, we don't want to
know what would happen. I'm just I'm trying to Okay,
all right, trunk cake, so simplify, man, I'd be done now.
So in order to you can get a lifetime warranty
on the tools, but you've really got to go through
(07:12):
the company, through Craftsmen at Craftsman dot com.
Speaker 1 (07:15):
Because that's Randy admitting he was wrong.
Speaker 7 (07:17):
Now, well, I'm just saying at Low's you can't necessarily
exchange it because they may not have that exact tool
in stock.
Speaker 8 (07:26):
And that's what the caller was saying, is that they
are available at Low's with a warranty.
Speaker 5 (07:31):
Okay, So Reddy said that they god was a lifetime warranty.
The listener said, they do have a lifetime warranty. Yeah,
not all of them, but not all of them, but
some of them. So you're mostly wrong, then sure.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
I mean I love look, I love the fact that
the guy correct me because now I know because I had.
Speaker 7 (07:49):
A problem where I took a tool in and tried
to exchange it and they said they couldn't.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
Okay, So that's what you were buising.
Speaker 5 (07:55):
Your life experience is off of That's what I was
trying to say when I was doing it.
Speaker 6 (08:00):
Jackie color back, it's almost working ups. Let's play up theers.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
It's the game that anyone can be.
Speaker 9 (08:11):
John Boyd kill the buses from the big guys.
Speaker 4 (08:16):
Play let's go contested number one.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
This should really be a lot of fun when you're
playing uppers. Have a hurry up and guest time, you
have the best time. You have a big shot. Let's
say hey to Bobby from Columbus, Georgia, we have a shot.
Speaker 6 (08:45):
Today.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
All right, we want away.
Speaker 5 (08:52):
Good morning, Bobby, Good morning. All right, buddy, let's jump
right in here. Get you through these three categories. All right,
give us hit it. Three things served at breakfast, ready
to go, e to ma'am. Give us three things in
(09:12):
the back seat of cars, ready to go.
Speaker 4 (09:17):
Little kids, coper seat and grocery.
Speaker 5 (09:20):
Hale right for the win. Three characters from Sesame Street
ready go.
Speaker 10 (09:29):
No hold big Birden Ernie, alright.
Speaker 5 (09:33):
Ernie for the win baby from Columbus one twenty dollars
worth of Ball's not cleaning products coming you away, Buddie.
Thank you, Buddy, I appreciate it.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
Guys, all right the man hang on with jacket.
Speaker 5 (09:53):
Bott the money I wor tomb are your news right
on the other side of time capsule to.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Get a early I have on Thursday.
Speaker 11 (10:32):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 9 (10:47):
Hey begging this, Here's Mondo Swisher reporting live from talking
about the sponsors my post twenty eight thousand, four hundred
and sixty two. Today's report bump to you buy Swish
or sweets the ten little cigar with a great, big
cherry taste. That's right, Beggin. I'm now Mungo Swisher. I
just closed the deal yesterday to sell the naming rights
(11:08):
to myself for the next four years. I'm calling in
today from the quaint Sermo Croatian village of Kalishnikov. As
most of you folks know, this is a troubled part
of the world. In fact, Beggin I was exploring a
rough part of town last night and got robbed at gunpoint,
lost six hundred dollars. That's one hundred bucks in cash
(11:29):
and five hundred dollars worth of on air mention. Thank goodness,
I was able to steady my nerves with a tall
glass of jack it Off vodka. Remember if you can't
shake it off, jack it Off. I'm pleased to have
a special guest with me today, his honor, the Mayor
of Kalishnikov, mister Boris Halichev. By the way, today's interview
(11:50):
is sponsored by the tough New Dodge Ram, the mayor
of Truckville. Now, mister Halechev, let's give our worldwide listening
audience a feel for the situation here in Kalishnikov. Tell
us about the roveing bands of ethnic cleansing warlords still
roving the cobblestone streets of this picturesque little corner of
the world. And speaking of picturesque, don't trust your memories
(12:12):
to just eddie film before you hit the road, do
what we do. Stock up now on plenty of EGFA
film products, professional quality at discount prices. Mister Mayor, talk.
Speaker 12 (12:24):
To us, Thank you well.
Speaker 9 (12:30):
Before I forget, let me mention that today's interview is
being brought to you over the amazing new Nokia thirty
one to fifty portable cellular satellite telephones, Nokia connecting people worldwide.
Speaker 12 (12:43):
Mister Mayor, thank you very much, mister Swisha, Good morning,
John Boy and beauty, and hello to all of your
listeners across America.
Speaker 9 (12:54):
Git one second, and there's no federal radio to listen
to the big show on that the amazing new Bows,
great big sound in an amazingly small package. And for
the complete home entertainment experience, check out the Bows Wave
Radio with CD player.
Speaker 12 (13:09):
Hold on, uh, yes, I forgot where it was? Where
was I?
Speaker 9 (13:16):
Let's see. Well, mister Mayor, you wouldn't have any trouble
figuring out where you are if you had the official
portable GPS system of the talk about the Sponsor World Tour.
The Panasonic Model thirty one hundred features a Chris Clear
five in color LCD display that gets you zeroed in
on yourself within fifty yards, no matter where your adventures
(13:36):
may take you.
Speaker 12 (13:39):
Yes, I thank you. That is a very nice unit day,
isn't it?
Speaker 9 (13:43):
And speaking a nice unit in you Stateside fans, I'm
looking for some excitement. Next time you're in the Grand
Strand area, South Carolina, be sure to stop in at
Tattle Tales two, home of Chesty McDonald, located just a
half mile north of Barefoot Landing on Highway seventeen in
North myrtle By Shop.
Speaker 12 (14:01):
Yes, do you really want to talk to me or not?
Speaker 9 (14:06):
I'd love to, mister Mayor, but unfortunately we're on a
time and speaking of time, thanks to our sponsor time X,
check out the newest member of the time X Expedition collection,
the Ironman Triathlon Speed and Distance System. Time X takes
a licking and keeps on a ticking and speaking a licking.
How many licks does it take to get to the
center of a PSI pop? The world may never know?
(14:29):
Stop cup off Tipsy pomps now at our official outfitters,
the Massive General School locations in Boone, Going Rock Valley
Crusis and coming soon to Candahar, Virginia. Right between Downhill
Candeheart Bike Rental and the Circle K home of the
Bottomless Bucket of root Beer and love is always So
My Mama, Mabel And hello to Ben. Doone and film
(14:50):
a cracking from Belfast, Northern Ireland to listen to my
talk about the sponsor updates and streaming audio from my
website dot com. Mombo Swisher talking about myself. How do
you feel love you Big.
Speaker 13 (15:08):
Sean Boy and Billy Way the way the Beach's played, John,
you're seeing how much Eld's wade?
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Where that is?
Speaker 5 (15:23):
Good morning radio, dumb right, Thursday morning Big shows on
(15:53):
the radio. Well, it's always a big thrill for us
when our next guests stops by. He is a true
living legend of the silver screen. Please welcome back, Sir
Alan Swan.
Speaker 14 (16:04):
Can the chatter Lieutenant fill that cannon with pastry and
keep firing until Countermandon is me. John Boy, your work
is done here, son, save yourself before these corpulent wenches
preach the barricade.
Speaker 1 (16:18):
Oh no, no, you're on the big show.
Speaker 6 (16:20):
Oh good heavens. I was flashing back to a film
I did in the sixties, Attack of the Full Figure Goals,
directed by Marty de Berghie. I heard of gigantic atomic
age house frows eating everything in their path. It was
like the green room at the View heard of that one.
(16:41):
It was blackballed by the body positive crowd. A shame. Really.
One of my best performances.
Speaker 1 (16:47):
Well, you always look to be in such great shape.
Have you always been so athletic?
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Oh?
Speaker 6 (16:52):
Not always. As a young man, I was remarkably plump.
I blame my mother. All that rich food was good cook. No,
she stole from the rich family. She worked for the
rest of the neighborhood was starving while I was budding
breasts like Sydney Sweeney.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
How did you beat it?
Speaker 6 (17:11):
Great question, you know, John Boyne. This was before everyone
had the latest, greatest cure for obesity. The methods were
much more primitive. Shall we say, Well, I'd love to
hear about that as you wish. There was a chap
in Middlington that had a guaranteed weight loss plan. There
were three options five quid, twenty quid fifty quid. Not
(17:32):
having much disposable income, I chose the five quid plan.
I took a shower and was shown to a large sauna. There,
sitting naked in a chair was the most beautiful woman
I'd ever seen, and she said, if you catch me,
you can make love to me. Now, being young, I
needed no encouragement. I pursued her with vigor, and just
(17:53):
as I was about to take her in my arms,
the time limit ran out o steaks spot, I had
lost an incredible ten pounds. I was sate delighted. I
returned the next day to purchase the next level plan
for twenty quid. As the day before, I took a
shower and was shown into an even bigger sauna. There
I beheld a statuesque redhead stark, naked except for a
(18:18):
pair of high heels. She said, if you catch me,
you can make love to me.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
Lover. Really, I assure you, my boy.
Speaker 6 (18:26):
My loins were ablaze, but even harbled by high heels,
the object of my affection was able to elude capture
before my time ran out. But this time I lost
a glance over fifteen pounds. I was sold. I returned
the next day fifty quid in hand, with a steely
commitment to succeeding this time around. Again, I took a shower,
(18:48):
was shown into an even larger sauna.
Speaker 1 (18:51):
What was a woman like this time?
Speaker 4 (18:52):
Well?
Speaker 6 (18:53):
I glanced around the room, fanning the steam with my hand,
searching for the fair maiden. I was alone, at least
I was for a moment. A large panel slid aside
and a full grown silver black mountain gorilla stomped into
the room. He wore a sign that said if I
catch you, I can make love to you. Is at
(19:16):
the end of the story, not exactly. I was never
overweight after that, and every year I get a Christmas
card from the Gorilla.
Speaker 1 (19:27):
Counts.
Speaker 6 (19:27):
Indeed, now, if you don't mind, Senor Bomber, Telly has
arranged an assignation with a fair maiden named Jenny Craig.
Speaker 5 (19:35):
You, dear friends, ladies and gentlemen, Sir Alan Swan, the
world's greatest doctor.
Speaker 1 (19:41):
I'm not an actor, damn you.
Speaker 6 (19:44):
I'm a movie star.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
It's a big show on the radio. I can't be
read this all right, sir, I'll read it.
Speaker 15 (19:54):
Good morning, This is Nigel Cadbury, Master Boys, faithful gentleman, gentlemen,
and you're listening to Master Boy and young Sir William
on the Big Show. It's my responsibility to make sure
that Master Boy gets up and gets to work on time,
so when he's laid it's my fault.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
So sad, I feel so.
Speaker 6 (20:53):
Good morning.
Speaker 5 (20:55):
It's to make Shaw on the radio for your Thursday,
October seventeen, Thanks show buzz Lo, Sol Tavern South ends
best sports bar hand Seana North Carolina me and bring
your dog and watch them football on the outdoor patio.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
You got some game we're about. The NFL Action is
tonight Denver at New Orleans.
Speaker 5 (21:17):
A good old spicy food teble peetelu.
Speaker 6 (21:22):
Load Yi.
Speaker 5 (21:24):
Ain't making Loso Tavern for Saturday brunch ten to two pm.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
Got a new Bloodberry Bar brunch as well.
Speaker 5 (21:31):
Oki Don't go Boys, Tracky Dackys, Oh god, I was close.
Tracky Dakis, Tacky drakis. All right, I'm gonna practice because
it's coming up in minutes. All right, Big Show rolls.
Speaker 6 (21:45):
On Good Morning.
Speaker 5 (21:49):
Big Show's on the radio head toward Halloween here on
this October seventeenth.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Tacky Dracky's in minutes.
Speaker 6 (21:54):
I got it.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
Nice.
Speaker 5 (21:55):
Let me tell you about that prize pack you can
win on John Boy Jeopardy. A hat, it's a t shirt,
it's a tumbler, and it's a twenty five dollars gas
card that you can use to fill up your brand
new custom motorcycle, the Big Show Motorcycle from Lord Tigers.
We've already got two finalists drawn. Make sure you get
your name in the hat before next week. We got
(22:17):
three more finalists to draw, so you still got time
to get your name in the hat. Whenness Brazebag hang out,
we'll play four ten minutes.
Speaker 10 (22:26):
Hello friends, you're old pell Bertford here for Tacky Jackie's
close for hose. It's that time of year, neighbors. The
leaves have changed, the days are shorter, Tampa Bay already sucks,
and soon the ghosts and cools in the living den
we'll be roaming the streets, knocking on your door and
begging for handouts. No, it's not free roaming democrats. It's
just Halloween, and what better way to celebrate thanksgivings? Ugly Nephew,
(22:47):
finish shopping the big Tacky Jackie Scanctacular Halloween Sale. Don't
settle for another stale and boring Halloween. Let Tacky Jackie
help you put the whore back in horror. Do you
(23:10):
want to look like your favorite celebrity skeezer but can't
afford the botox?
Speaker 1 (23:14):
Yeah, well you're in luck.
Speaker 10 (23:16):
Tacky Jackies has a complete line of high quality masks
from Icky Dickies of Greater Bayoned.
Speaker 1 (23:21):
Everyone loves Iggy Dicky.
Speaker 10 (23:27):
This Halloween. You just can't lose in Tacky Jackie's clothes
for Hose choose from a variety of famous fabulous faces
turned fearsome through botched plastic surgery.
Speaker 4 (23:36):
A lie, It's a lie.
Speaker 10 (23:40):
It We've got Donna, Tella Versacci, Meg Ryan's Share, Terry Hatchard,
Data Monil, Priscilla Presley, Daryl Hannah, Jennis Dickinson, Little Kim,
Suzanne Summers, Joan Bennark, the blond Midget from Little Ladies
of La and the one that's either Lucille Ball or
Paul Stanley from Kim and Our Time Umber one bestseller
(24:01):
from two thousand and seven is backed by a popular demand.
The hill Raiser everyone's favorite political pin and will give everyone.
Speaker 1 (24:09):
Chilleries when you wear this.
Speaker 10 (24:11):
Hillary comes with prison straight pantsuit, tankles not included.
Speaker 4 (24:15):
What difference at this point does it make?
Speaker 6 (24:18):
And how are you a daytime TV junkie?
Speaker 10 (24:21):
Do you and your postmenoposal pals want to go out
as the crew from the View? Sorry, we don't have
the rights to those masks, but we've got the next
best thing. Want to go as Joy behar put on
the rem and beaver Mask?
Speaker 1 (24:38):
Want to be Barbara Walters?
Speaker 10 (24:40):
Go with the shrunken head guy from Beetlejuice And if
Whopopy Goldberg is your choice. Put a little lipstick on
the Predator and voila. You're good to go as those
jabber and hos. But if sweets hurt your treat and
(25:01):
you're more of a trick, We've got the outfits to
put the don one in your favorite John. Exclusive from
Full Figure Freddy's House of Heifers comes our super absorbent
line of lingerie featuring the Sweaty Teddy. If you're pleasingly pumping'
like to shake that rump, but don't like leaving dribbles
on the dance floor, put on a sweaty Teddy and
boogie your booty. The Sweaty Teddy can hold up the
(25:23):
seven gallons of perspiration. It's also a sexy replacement for
those bulk he depends your friends, we'll all.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
Say shamp wow.
Speaker 10 (25:31):
All the camera guy say, princess, how's that bust line?
Do people boo your boobs can't call your cans? He
haul your hooters. Well, here's your chance to get even.
Right now, We've got fifty percent off all our googly
eye novel ye Ross from Juggie and Juggie of Beverly Hills.
Speaker 6 (25:49):
All bras are.
Speaker 10 (25:49):
Printed with an assortment of creepy monster eyeballs. Turn your
double deed disasters into three D dynamos, take your shirt
off and scare their pants off.
Speaker 1 (26:03):
Stop and you can only get them at.
Speaker 10 (26:06):
Tacky Jackie's Clothes for Hose and the Big skank Tecular
Holloween Sale.
Speaker 1 (26:10):
You're so many fifty Big Tacky Jackies.
Speaker 10 (26:16):
Your one stop shop, drop and rack and roll this Halloween.
Choose from our fast array of sketchy discount costumes from
the nereal Vineys of Venice Beach. We've got the Wolfman,
the Wolf Girl, Frankenstein Frankenberg, the Invisible Man Girl, Creature
from the Black Neighborhood Venom of the Fadsburger, the Muhlman,
the Freckleman, the pupil Man, Count Dracula, No Count Dracula,
the Mummy, the Dummy, the Rummy, the Hunchback of Notre Dames,
(26:36):
the Halfwood of That States, the fat Back of Clemson
and King Wongs, the incredibly well and down Asian Giant Gorilla,
all on sale now at Tacky Jackies Clothes for Hose.
And we've got scary special guests to entertain and terrify
the whole family. Hey, Hey, hey, crackhead, Kelly Kohagen will
be matting the snaggletooth kissing booth. Will you be the
(26:58):
first to successfully kiss around those guy Hi Herpes he
Man Loretta Lamprey, the hiccky hicck. We'll be dishing out
the purple neck nirples on Friday and Saturday, or until
her suction gives out. Get your put down to where
the prices are cut down. That tacky Jackie's close for
(27:19):
hose Go three miles down two mile road. Take the
fork in the road to the greasy spoon part behind
hefty heinees plus sized porta potties pen, follow the ear
splitting shrieks to tacky Jackies. Close for hose Figs Gang
tagular Halloween sales, and don't forget get another ten percent
off when you sing our jingle. This is your old
(27:46):
pal burtburn saying I'll see you there.
Speaker 15 (27:54):
Going on.
Speaker 5 (27:55):
That didn't work all right? Well, let's play John Board
Jumping Ay review Yesterday. Question we found out. According to
Stephen Tyler, the title for Aerosmith's Walk This Way was
taken from a line in this mel Brooks comedy.
Speaker 8 (28:09):
Is Young Frankenstein.
Speaker 5 (28:11):
Yeah, igors. Today's John Boyjeffardy. Sound designer Ben Bert created
the sounds made by this robotic Hollywood icon by whistling
and making fart noises into an old tape recorder and
then speeding up the recording.
Speaker 6 (28:30):
Oh who is Joe Biden?
Speaker 1 (28:35):
Good guess.
Speaker 5 (28:38):
One big show you told free line? Yeah no, don't
let me think about it. We play John Boydgeffarty next,
(29:12):
Good Morning. That's a big show on the radio World.
Speaker 1 (29:14):
It to your Thursday Today's featuring track for the Big
Show bit Box Cadbury goes deer Honey.
Speaker 5 (29:21):
There's your keywords, deer honey, hit the bit box, Hit
the Big Show dot COM's brought you by Lord Tiger's
Motorcycle Lawyers at Ride you can re shore to win
the custom Big Show Motorcycle.
Speaker 1 (29:31):
Big Show Bike dot Com. There right now, that's why
yell slive across America.
Speaker 7 (29:38):
It's John Boy, Jeffy and now a man who has
absolutely made a career out of whistling and making fart
noises into old tape recorders.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Here he is. It's Don Boyd.
Speaker 4 (29:53):
That's bike up.
Speaker 1 (29:56):
As I had Gary out of Mitchell, Tennessee Gary.
Speaker 4 (30:01):
Good morning, then boy.
Speaker 5 (30:03):
Hello body welcome in here. Well, Gary, the thing you
were you were fast this morning. You got the first
shot at John Boy Jeopardy.
Speaker 1 (30:12):
Do you feel it?
Speaker 4 (30:15):
All right?
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Well that's a review to question here for those just
joining us.
Speaker 5 (30:19):
Sound as uner Ben Bird created the sounds made by
this robotic Hollywood icon by whistling and making fart noises
into an old tape recorder and then speeding up the recording.
What you got, Gary, he's a little short fat dude.
Speaker 4 (30:39):
R D you say, little R two D two?
Speaker 1 (30:45):
Well you nailed again that all right? That is pretty
wild now I'm thinking about it. Yeah, I got it.
Speaker 5 (30:58):
Hey, Gary, I was on here a year ago as
my wife had just pasted what forty years we were together?
Speaker 7 (31:07):
Man?
Speaker 1 (31:07):
Well, Gary was sorry to hear that. Buddy. I'm glad.
I'm glad you're out there.
Speaker 4 (31:12):
Man, you hang on, Thank you young.
Speaker 1 (31:14):
All right, buddy, alright, let's jump out and catch you
up on your news.
Speaker 16 (31:25):
Let us play in about twenty minutes, Gary Busey, alright,
then a minute, this will be showing the radios.
Speaker 5 (32:08):
John bonbell A grilling sauce su mission out, Old Carla
Cook's gonna be with our boy, Kevin Sporting Gayton and grilling.
There's during the Bama Tailgate Show every Saturday during the
season on YouTube. It'll drop three p m. John bo
Miiller problems, Kannaka Sausage featured this week. Carl's Kannaca crack Crackers,
(32:31):
c Love Crackers prayed very lightly with Doug fat and
the light sprinkled. John Bore Billy pork crub. Then the
then slice and knet of sausage. Stopped that with a
thinly sliced piece of high a pino pepper. Small drama.
John Bone Milla Hot Spicy grilling sauce. Cook one, you
preheat the grill three fifty thirty minutes of bak, you
slap yourself and so good.
Speaker 1 (32:52):
Jack it down. Bama Tailgate Show YouTube This Saturday, John.
Speaker 5 (32:56):
Boone Billy Grilling Sauce. Wow, good morning, that's a big
(33:24):
show on the radio.
Speaker 6 (33:25):
There we go.
Speaker 1 (33:27):
It's time for the Diary of Carrie Beausey.
Speaker 5 (33:32):
Dear Diary, this is Gary.
Speaker 6 (33:36):
Beauty.
Speaker 11 (33:39):
I've been pushing myself hardlyly, Diary. I'm stiff and sore
like it ain't never been before. It's got to the
point now that when I tell people I do my
own son. So I'm actually referring to going to the
toilet by myself. I spent my professional life being good
to everyone else.
Speaker 6 (33:56):
Now it was time to be good to me. Bought
a first class ticket to tie lamb Old Gary is
taking the Massagi tour.
Speaker 1 (34:06):
Rub me left, Rub me right.
Speaker 6 (34:10):
My butt cheeks feel a bit too tight.
Speaker 11 (34:14):
Stick them thumbs in there, and don't go light.
Speaker 6 (34:18):
I need a massage to night.
Speaker 11 (34:21):
Rub it up, dub where's a hot tub? The play
right over was the treat Diary. Little tie gals no
bigger than a minute waiting on me hand and foot.
I gotta tell you, Diary, these darlings ain't got much
meat on them. They gotta wear dresses because they got
no ash to hold their slacks up. Nothing to brag
(34:42):
about a pop neither are they all like this? Old
Garrett needs a thick, strong woman to work out these
beaucy kinks. I was starting to get a bad feeling
about this.
Speaker 1 (34:54):
Where's your boobies? Where's you bought?
Speaker 2 (34:56):
You?
Speaker 6 (34:56):
Twiggy chicks don't make the cut. Need a Gallon's got
some beef to give bag gar some true relief. May
got to the hotel nice place rooms, got a bedet
shiny honey.
Speaker 5 (35:12):
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 11 (35:16):
Barely got my grip unpacked, and there's a knock at
the door. Ready for my first massage experience. At least
I thought I was ready. The car stopped in front
of some rude side zoo. What fresh hell was this
supposed to be? But help, I bought the package, I
might as well go with the flow. The first thing
they did was take me out to lay in some
(35:37):
big corral.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
Before I know it, here.
Speaker 11 (35:39):
Comes a bunch of goats. They commenced the climbing on
me like a birch log, bouncing and a hopping with
them tiny whos. Kind of reminded me of the weekend
I spent with a couple of gals who was little people.
Speaker 5 (35:51):
Yea, yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 11 (35:53):
Both experience were relaxing, but for different reasons. Then here
comes this damn elephant, an elephant man. They bring this
big thing over and it raises up its foot, and
I just knew that this was the end. I had
the same feeling when I got hammered and challenged Rosie
(36:13):
o'donald of a wrestling match, But it was actually all right.
She is real gentle the elephant, not Rosy and the
last massage of the day was a facial. They put
on some of that chingy Chongi music and gave me
some weird tea to drink. Next thing I know, they
got my face covered with snails.
Speaker 6 (36:34):
I got slimed trunks and hooves, and slimy snails got
me thinking, what the hell is this a dream or somemmarage?
Speaker 1 (36:41):
All I want was the damn massage.
Speaker 11 (36:44):
All the next day was more of the same, wooden millets, cactus,
hot rocks.
Speaker 6 (36:54):
I finally just took to the streets on my own.
There's a big old redheaded gal washing her ox. I
asked her where could I get a good massage, and
she winked at me and took me inside.
Speaker 11 (37:03):
Now before I could shuck my duds, she stripped me,
naked her own self like a monkey, peeling a nanner.
She rubbed me long and hard, and it was glorious.
Then the moment I was waiting for. She offered me
a happy ending, But in their language, it's twenty percent
off the next visit.
Speaker 6 (37:24):
Hey, there's sweet cheeks. I ain't no rookie. All I
want is that fortune cookie. Don't send me home. We
come too far. Nothing worse than a horny.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
Gar off off yop.
Speaker 11 (37:37):
Well Diary, I gotta ski daddle. I challenged Rosie o'donald
to her best two out of three falls. Damn, I
miss that elephant. Until next time.
Speaker 1 (37:50):
EXAs and holes. Yeah no, Mucie, Good morning, No big
shows on a.
Speaker 17 (38:02):
Well well, well, you've obviously got nothing better to do,
or maybe you're just not smart enough to change the dial.
Whatever the reason, you're listening to John Boy and Billy
on the Big Show. Aunt, they won that.
Speaker 4 (38:23):
H Good morning, and it's a big shaw the radio.
Speaker 5 (38:57):
My man Dog Ris gonna head out for Vegas for
his last call. How about that man season flown by?
We got dugging coming up. It's just a couple of minutes. Hey,
I'm not gonna wait till the whole edition of Dumb
Crook News for this dumb crook story we got so
these people, they ain't only dumb crooks, they're dumb business people.
(39:20):
So a couple in Louisiana was arrested after their vehicle
was repossessed and drugs and gun was found inside. Then
it wasn't a personal stash. Detectives found more than nine
pounds of pot eighteen grams of mushrooms, ecstasy pills, packaging
materials for street drug distribution, and a semi automatic handgun.
(39:45):
They were arrested when they showed up at the storage
yard to retrieve their personal belongings.
Speaker 1 (39:51):
You know, you really don't have to go with us.
If you just point out where the car is, we'll
be happy to get that.
Speaker 5 (39:58):
They're facing multiple drug and gun related charges, which they
should not. Only did they blow their car payment money
to make a car payments. I didn't get it on
the streets quick enough. It couldn't happen to a nicer couple.
I'm guessing on that right there, dumb crooks. All right,
(40:18):
good work, I'll keep it up all right. When we
got here, Doug Rice. In minutes, big show rolls on.
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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