May 22, 2025 • 51 mins
Thursday (pt 1 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, we celebrate our favorite girl & Big Show Mamma, Jackie!.. - Pillars has a personal letter to Jackie that we’ll share.. - The Catholic Church is celebrating the appointment of a brand new Pope - and we’ll meet the his official stand-in - aka: the Substitute Pope.. - Doug Rice revels the details on a dark cloud that has formed over the Indianapolis Motor Speedway and has sunny hopes for the Memorial Day Weekend’s traditional Coca-Cola 600 at Charlotte Motor Speedway.. - The Mayor of Dismal Seepage checks in.. - and we’ll wrap up with some “guy talk”…
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Good more than everybody if my Big Show family yours.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Thank you for listening. Listen news what sport's coming up?
Speaker 3 (00:08):
Hello?
Speaker 4 (00:10):
Listen Ricky Bates, sharp brother? Oh how about you pot lickers?
Are listening to a couple other pot liquors noted John
boyd Philly on The Big Show. You know, I just
a guest star on the Playhouse and the official mascot
from mister Popular, the pizza Runt. That's just the tip
of the iceberg. But this note from John Boy keep
(00:33):
it short.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
Sun up up, you got the dottle day.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Wow, you got a chicken in your back? Bye? Please
go here?
Speaker 3 (01:29):
Alright here it.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Is Thursday, right, we'll be celebrating Friday for you know.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
It's see what's sapping?
Speaker 1 (01:37):
Spugialon has made twenty seconds National By and Musical Instrument Day.
It'll be nice a kid. There's never too late you
learn a musical instrument.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
Don't think that.
Speaker 1 (01:55):
National Vanilla Pudding Day and rose some Pudding, the National
Craft Distillery Day. A lot of that going on. It's
like there's like four craft beer deals. What would he
come distilleries? I guess around here there's like four within
the new.
Speaker 5 (02:17):
Breweries.
Speaker 6 (02:18):
Are your your your spirits and your count is way off.
Speaker 4 (02:22):
There's like forty.
Speaker 6 (02:24):
The reason they do that is because of the alcohol laws.
They don't have enough of their own to become a distributor,
so they have to partner together with other brewers to
get enough to meet the quota.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
Well, must be a big clientail is like forty of within.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Yeah, it's huge.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
It's huge right now.
Speaker 7 (02:50):
I don't know if you notice the age range and
living species around our studio here, John, But kind of
young Kennedys like the craft beer. Then they like to
go to a brewery and they'll clubs anymore. It's it's
going and hanging out the brewery and playing some corn
hole and.
Speaker 6 (03:06):
Yeah yeah, and they an'll have like the I p
as all have weird names. You know that that's embarrassing
to yell out, you know for a bartender.
Speaker 4 (03:14):
You know, maybe I need two hot blondes over here.
That's your problem.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
So this craft distillery is making like the moonshine, I
always do that.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
That's distilled, is what you're said. Yeah, all right, all right.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
Well two more national days. National Maritime Day recognizes the
launch of the maritime industry in the US. Hey, everybody,
on the on the ocean. This morning it's National Solitaire Day.
Everybody playing solitaire somewhere.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
That you should be working.
Speaker 8 (03:51):
First thing this morning.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
Okay, well look over here.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
Three days industry saved up. We'll get a first prize.
Back out and get the winning beginning Big Shows on
the radio. Good morning, Big Shows on the radio. First
prize pack. We got a hat, t shirt, tumbler and
a twenty five dollars gas card from my buzz from
law Tigers motorcycle lawyers who ride law Tigers. You never
(04:17):
ride alone. Click on their bounder at the Big Show
dot Com. Getting close to you. Let's look at three
days in history. We're well clean our categories from this morning,
May twenty second. It was nineteen eighty six Silvester Stallone
signed a ten pictures six year deal with the United
Artists were reported fifteen million per film, making him at
(04:39):
the time the richest actor in Hollywood. Wow, they still
know you. Watch you talk about streaming and stuff. You
watch Tulsa King as one of the one of the
Yellowstone Riders.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
What was the name of the show's tulsiteen. Yeah, Taylor's
shared that's one of his. You might like it.
Speaker 9 (04:57):
Raddy.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Yeah, I've got a mob guy. He is, and they
make him go to Oklahoma.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
TELLSA when he gets out of prison and sets up shop,
you know there.
Speaker 4 (05:05):
He doesn't stand out.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
I'm sure.
Speaker 5 (05:08):
Pretty good.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
That's a Tulsa king still working, all right. He's like
seventy three, he says he is on the show. I
guess that's about his real age.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Could be here too, all right.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
Nineteen ninety seven, the US Postal Service issued a thirty
two cent stamp honoring bugs Bunny right, And then in
six the US Department of Veterans Affairs reported a computer
containing personal information on some twenty six point five million
veterans and spouses had been stolen. Oh six, So yes,
(05:44):
if some of y'all were victims of that and know
it by now, huh, yeah, they cleared it right.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Well, there you go.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
There's that three categories one eight hundred big shows you
told free line. Come on, we'll play out birds next.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Good morning, it is making show on the radio.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
We're on a t your Thursday morning feature track from
the mag show bt Box. The show clip entitled if
we were gay.
Speaker 2 (06:32):
Tur key words, if we were remember this. That's funny, but.
Speaker 6 (06:36):
It is one of my very favorite all time clips
because it was all very spontaneous.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
Yeah, very very funny.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Take it out there at the big bugs said the
Big show Dot coming right now.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Uppers, Let's play Uppers. It's the game that anyone can win.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Shoon boys, really to give you prices from the big
prize Beam.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Let's go contested number one.
Speaker 3 (07:08):
This should really be a lot of fun.
Speaker 1 (07:11):
You're playing out the tablry up.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
And guest time you have the best time.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
You have a big shot.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
Let's say, heard the dumb from break court in South Carolina.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
We shots, Good morning, dub.
Speaker 5 (07:36):
What's going on?
Speaker 4 (07:38):
Gone boy?
Speaker 2 (07:40):
You are right at this moment, dumb? Can you feel it?
Speaker 5 (07:45):
I can't feed it all the way from here, man,
like you slap me outside the head.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
You know that's the effect I was hoping for, Dumb,
best one.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
So now I can barely understand you. We're gonna go
through these three categories.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
Yeah, I'm feeling it all right, double Come on, buddy,
were pulling for you. So now you got five seconds
per category, So here we go. You know I have
a slow trigger finger. Sometime you feel it, So if
you can in five.
Speaker 5 (08:26):
Seconds whim duke a light count it at these phones.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
I have no idea forever.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
All right, Well, Doug, give us three slice stallone movies
ready go.
Speaker 5 (08:48):
Rocky one, rock you two around one?
Speaker 10 (08:55):
All right?
Speaker 2 (08:56):
Good word? Up here we go right now.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
Give us three famous rabbits ready by.
Speaker 5 (09:07):
Pleased? Good Burney and Roger Racket.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
Okay, you've got about Roger. All right, good workd Ubb.
We go for the wind. Three things stored on a computer,
ready go.
Speaker 5 (09:23):
Partial information, a resume.
Speaker 4 (09:30):
Okay, yeah, and.
Speaker 6 (09:39):
Tax forms, pictures.
Speaker 11 (09:41):
And okay, we are giving you that big old log
Tiger prize package headed down the great court.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Buddy, congratulations, Man, what do Jackie?
Speaker 1 (10:09):
Jackie is gonna tell you all about it? Get all
the info right now, Buddy, I'm gonna put your own hold.
Speaker 5 (10:16):
Boy, I gotta ask you a question.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
I go ahead.
Speaker 5 (10:20):
What are you gonna stop playing Pink Floyd and Leed's
every single morning? Hal never.
Speaker 4 (10:29):
When the program directors put us in charge?
Speaker 2 (10:35):
Yes, about how it was correct? Never started it?
Speaker 3 (10:42):
You jack God luck.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
The most important person in the room this morning. She's
back there on the phone with Dub right now. Still
Jackie Curry's birthday, Jackie, his birthday today.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
Look how it is starting out? Awesome, awesome, You've taken
this gets you.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
Really don't have to celebrate me.
Speaker 4 (11:11):
I swear, just let me go home.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
You say, don't get your tribute.
Speaker 12 (11:48):
This is the award winning Joah Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 13 (12:05):
Welcome to John Boy and Billy Playhouse. Today's episode, Ricky
bees crying Jack. As our story opens, Ricky B. Sharp's
wife Lucy has been awakened at four a m. By
a mysterious sound coming from the Sharp kitchen in Bilthan, Alabama.
Speaker 14 (12:25):
Ah, Ricky, Recky, Hello, Hell.
Speaker 4 (12:40):
Hello, I'm here in the kitchen Lucy or Sharp.
Speaker 15 (12:48):
Honey? Are you crying?
Speaker 4 (12:50):
No, I'm pup.
Speaker 15 (12:54):
Go back to band, Ricky, What in the world is wrong?
Speaker 2 (12:58):
I said, go back to band, sweetheart? What is it?
Speaker 4 (13:02):
I just woke up. I couldn't go back to sleep.
Speaker 15 (13:07):
Well, why are you crying?
Speaker 5 (13:09):
Will?
Speaker 4 (13:13):
I'm just having a tearful moment on memory late, if
you must know, I just realized that tomorrow is June
the first, the anniversary of a big moment in my life.
It was back when you and me would jumped out
of high school June first, nineteen eighty two. Was it
not me and you done? The fud Rutger for the
first time, the fud rucker, the horizontal mambo to tackle me,
(13:37):
Elmo the beast with two backs to get you up you.
Speaker 15 (13:41):
Made the first time. We beat it, and that's what's
making you cry.
Speaker 4 (13:45):
Yeah, I'll never forget that night you wore that black
skinnered T shirt and the metopant bell bottom. We twinned
up down the partially finished basement watching Donnie and Marie.
Next thing you know, we was bowed up and going
at it. I remember, and you probably remember when your
Naddy come a beryland down the stairs, call her said
(14:06):
what the French folks call the fragrant delictor.
Speaker 15 (14:10):
Yet he was pretty mad.
Speaker 4 (14:12):
Telling me, grabbed me by the scruff of my berry
GiB mullet, swung me over his head like it was
like I was a dead cat, and he was on
Finn trying to get rid of a ward and they
would That is from Tom Sawyer, which you know, if
you'd ever read anything longer than the TV section of
the Sunday.
Speaker 15 (14:27):
Paper, well you always was the literate one of the family.
Speaker 4 (14:31):
Anyways, Beg Daddy sets you upstairs and went to wailing
on me like a rended mule. See that scene of
the Avengers when the grab LOKEI by the scrap of
the neck and beat him. That's what happened. That man
beat me. Ain't wait for Sunday.
Speaker 15 (14:43):
I remember what a racket.
Speaker 4 (14:45):
Then he got right up in my face there and
he leading down to Logston boy, that there's my little girl.
She deserves to be treated right. Don't include some piply
little corn dog trying to get frisky. Then he said,
do you love her? And I said, yes, sir, more
than anything.
Speaker 15 (15:03):
In the world. Oh you said that, yes, ma'am.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
Your daddy said, look a here, boy, if you love her,
you better do right by her. Ask her to marry you.
Because if I get you pulling another stut like I
guess you little cherry picker. And that's where I got
that in front of your dad, I'll make sure you
spend the next thirty years in prison.
Speaker 15 (15:22):
Wow. And it was the very next day you asked
me to bury you.
Speaker 4 (15:26):
Uh huh. And I just turned that over in my mind.
You know i'd be getting out today.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
We hope you've enjoyed John Boy and Billy Playhouse.
Speaker 4 (15:42):
You ain't still got that skinner shirt down chilling?
Speaker 13 (15:46):
Then again next time when we'll hear the crusty old
guy at Things Remembered at the mall.
Speaker 2 (15:51):
Say, hey, diick man, let me hold a dollar.
Speaker 15 (15:55):
Cherry picker, John Boy and.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Billy Shoot them, John Boys, shoot him, shoot him, shoot them.
Speaker 8 (16:02):
Good morning radio, dumb right, good morning.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
That's a big show on the radio in minutes on
Jackie's birthday, The Story of Jackie and right now.
Speaker 16 (16:42):
Animal Channel presents the Crocodile Stalker traveling around the world
in search of exotic wildlife, then annoying the crap.
Speaker 17 (16:52):
Out of them.
Speaker 2 (16:53):
Now, dear Steve, thank you, loving good night Steve.
Speaker 4 (16:57):
Here in the wilds of Arkansas, home of the razorbacks,
poor education, and disgraced American presidents, and today we're looking
for that legendary creature, the snipe. Hold on, I know
what you're thinking, Old Steve has falling for the oldest
joke in a book. But don't worry. I'm on to them.
(17:18):
I just don't want to spoil their fun. Some of
the boys even hooked me up with a local expert
from right here in Millsburg. What a character, and here
he comes.
Speaker 18 (17:26):
Now, how you doing out here, mister crocodile Feller?
Speaker 4 (17:30):
Not too shabby.
Speaker 18 (17:31):
How are you, Karl, I'm tallerm All Rickon. I like
the way you talk right.
Speaker 4 (17:36):
Back at you. Well, your boss, mister Cox says, besides
being a mechanical whiz, you're just about the best snipe
hunter in the state.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
I do all right.
Speaker 18 (17:45):
You just gotta be a little smarter than the snipers. All,
I guess I'm.
Speaker 8 (17:48):
A little smarter.
Speaker 4 (17:50):
Well, I brought my gear along for the big snipe hunt.
Purl that bag, flashlight and a whistle. You know something,
Master for being on TV and all you ain't very smart.
You go, honey snipes for that miss, and now put
a real heart on you. You make them say it's
so dangerous. Aren't they just little flightless buds like a
(18:11):
key we back home?
Speaker 10 (18:12):
These ain't damn little sissy yankee snipes, mister, These is
them Arkansas razor beak snipes. Well, what's the difference, Well, sir,
I got a sharp beak and claws that'll plump slash
you to ribbons.
Speaker 2 (18:24):
Krikey.
Speaker 4 (18:25):
I guess we'll just have to call it off and
come back another time.
Speaker 10 (18:29):
No, no need for that.
Speaker 18 (18:31):
There you go, mister cronfeller.
Speaker 10 (18:33):
I recognize all you being needing. What's this kaiser blade?
Some folks calls it a sling blade. I called it
the kaiser blade.
Speaker 3 (18:41):
Yeah, and what do I do with it?
Speaker 10 (18:43):
Well, sir, when that old mister Snipe here's at a
whistle sees out of flashlights, he'll come a barreling out
of them bush's iron your best bet. There's a heck
off that beak before he can hiskey bob ye, and
you can chop his leg off so you can't claw
your iners out. Then you take a sharp edge cut
his head clean off. Well here in the commotion. By
(19:06):
that time we'll come here be dressing my out her
goodwood mustard A well, wish me like got I put
my armor on you before I set off out of here.
Speaker 4 (19:16):
Let's see how the hunt goes first, Okay, all right, then,
oh brother, talk about drama. I better get rid of
this nasty blady before someone gets hurt. Here we go
now on with the charade, flashlight on and here.
Speaker 18 (19:35):
Snipe, snipe, snipe, snipe?
Speaker 4 (19:41):
What fun? I better having a real life. What a
great bunch of blokes? Yeah, what what's this?
Speaker 8 (19:50):
Cracky?
Speaker 4 (19:50):
You are not going to believe these, but I think
these might be real snipes brown and round in that
long beak. What a bunch of little ravers. Hold on
a second, you chick, chick, chick chick, Come on, here
we go, Here we go. Yeah, I've got I've got one.
Oh he's adorable and the beak sure does look sharp.
(20:12):
I'll just touch it with the end of my finger. Huh,
right straight through. I'll just h that's smart's take it
out and remember to keep that beak away from my
hands and my face. I'm gonna put this rascal in
(20:34):
that second before he decides to cut loose with those.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
Claws.
Speaker 4 (20:42):
Oh, chimney whiskers. Well, I'm not taking any more chances.
I'll just scoop up the whole lot of them here
we are and put them in this bag.
Speaker 10 (20:53):
I have it, dinge, mister Kropfeller, What you got to say?
I hit be totaled if I don't give out first.
Speaker 4 (21:00):
Well, Carl, it looks like that joke's on you.
Speaker 18 (21:03):
Look in this baggy at real snipes, mister, Then just youngins.
How can you tell?
Speaker 10 (21:11):
Because of grown up ones?
Speaker 2 (21:13):
Looks like that.
Speaker 4 (21:16):
Holy crap, she's at least nine feet tall, like a
cross between an ostrich a Tarradectyl and Barbara streisand horror.
I thought this was some kind of a joke.
Speaker 18 (21:27):
No, sir, some kind of burn.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
Well, well, what do I do now? You want to
drop that poke?
Speaker 18 (21:33):
That mama saying what did you catch my?
Speaker 10 (21:36):
Youngins firm?
Speaker 19 (21:36):
What did you catch me? Young sir?
Speaker 18 (21:38):
I'm like, all right there now what I have had
her with that kinder blade?
Speaker 7 (21:44):
What?
Speaker 3 (21:44):
Throw it away? What do I do?
Speaker 2 (21:47):
Close your eyes?
Speaker 4 (21:48):
If I do?
Speaker 2 (21:49):
Will she leave me alone? Know sir? But at least
you won't have to watch yourself get in dowar apart.
Speaker 3 (21:56):
Lucky me.
Speaker 2 (22:18):
Nothing it matters now?
Speaker 18 (22:19):
But could you hold them away from both?
Speaker 2 (22:21):
Thanks?
Speaker 3 (22:22):
All right, Dan.
Speaker 16 (22:23):
Tune in again next week for another episode of The
Crocodile Stalkers.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
Good morning, you got the Big Show on the radio.
More chances for you to win coming up after your news,
weather and sports.
Speaker 4 (22:42):
Good morning.
Speaker 9 (22:44):
Thisious Connery Sean Connery. And you might think that I'm
just another of sophisticated yet rugged Scottish movie star, and
you'd be right. What's my secret? The truth is I
can't stop my day without listening to the Big Show
with John Boy and Billy crush Me. They're a lot
funnier than doctor Noan blofeld oo aho ah.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
Good morning. That's to make it shown right.
Speaker 1 (23:45):
Welcome out, Thursday morning, May twenty seconds, Jaggie's birthday.
Speaker 19 (23:53):
I was just always just sitting around here talking, you know,
pontificating as we often do.
Speaker 17 (23:57):
When he says we, he means he. He was holding
his scepter, wearing his cape just before putting his crown on,
and telling us how grateful we should all be.
Speaker 19 (24:07):
Me and Randy been going out a little bit, you know,
and I just was trying to name some you know,
good things that I've done, and one of it was
my idea. And I discovered Jackie, and I think my
first response was like this, yeah, that's the way I
remember it.
Speaker 18 (24:21):
Yeah right, yeah, remember everybody around me was having fun.
Speaker 4 (24:27):
Yeah no, I think I said, well, you know, I
need some help. You're killing me.
Speaker 6 (24:30):
Please, I gotta get some help.
Speaker 2 (24:31):
He I'm all right.
Speaker 4 (24:33):
Line, I said, well, I'm thinking about this.
Speaker 17 (24:35):
That girl used to be the perceptionist in that Jackie.
Speaker 4 (24:37):
And he said she's black.
Speaker 17 (24:42):
I know, but you know she's real conscientious and work
really hard.
Speaker 4 (24:49):
She don't having boobs.
Speaker 2 (24:52):
I'm not really interested in, you know, what she looks like.
Speaker 18 (24:55):
I'm just I know I'm gonna wind up having a
bar so.
Speaker 4 (25:01):
And he had that here and putting up on the rack.
Speaker 17 (25:04):
I'll figure that's serious tone that y'all never ever get
to hear it. But I get to hear when I
go over to his house. When I've absolutely had it
with him. I go over to his house say, okay,
back porch. Now I'm going to back porch, and you know,
san to to toe, and he gets that serious voice.
Speaker 4 (25:20):
He went, don't you know any baby dolls?
Speaker 9 (25:26):
I did not.
Speaker 2 (25:27):
He just making that stuff up jagging.
Speaker 20 (25:29):
You know, when I was answering the phones used to
I sweety, I love you, and I thought, oh, he
is so sweet.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
He really likes me.
Speaker 20 (25:36):
So one of them answering the phones and he's going upstairs.
Here comes this baby doll downstairs. Baby, I just love you,
And my head jerked up and look, I thought he
was so sweet to me.
Speaker 4 (25:46):
It's all the girls. Oh yeah, the man when he leaves.
Speaker 2 (25:55):
I was trying to make you jealous.
Speaker 20 (25:57):
Well, and you succeeded, and I guarantee you try to
talk him out of hiring me.
Speaker 4 (26:07):
And then occasionally with throwing the how much is that
gonna come.
Speaker 2 (26:12):
I tell you what, Jack, the best thing ever happened
to us? I mean me personally, I mean y'all. I
know we're all in this, and y'all are the best
things that ever happened to us.
Speaker 17 (26:21):
The kind of people you've said, yeah, whatever, didn't get
to the part where this, Yeah, that's.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
Why I stop him.
Speaker 17 (26:29):
The kind of people he he suggests we hire are
people we can't even mention on the air anymore.
Speaker 4 (26:35):
They were banned from the building and from the program.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
He knows all about Maters.
Speaker 4 (26:42):
Yeah, that one's coming.
Speaker 2 (26:47):
Anyway. Hey is Thanksgiving? Whatever?
Speaker 4 (26:52):
What Thanksgiving dinner is usually like it's a big fight.
Speaker 5 (26:54):
At the end.
Speaker 4 (26:55):
As I screamed at you when you left the room.
Speaker 17 (26:57):
You know, well, besides the word I yelled at you
that I can't say on the radia, this is pretty much.
Speaker 2 (27:01):
All I got.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
Don't take any of the little pieces away from doing
a great job. Man, fact I don't want to hear
it now.
Speaker 5 (27:08):
Five man?
Speaker 2 (27:10):
Okay, well where are we stable? We at the fifty
one thirty break?
Speaker 3 (27:15):
Are we going?
Speaker 1 (27:16):
No way?
Speaker 5 (27:16):
Hit?
Speaker 10 (27:16):
No?
Speaker 3 (27:17):
Yeah, well you might need a higher steve.
Speaker 4 (27:21):
You said we got to bring in this a.
Speaker 19 (27:23):
Young kids in the other booth and I can't hear him.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
Yes, where we are.
Speaker 4 (27:28):
Don't ask the producer, No, I ask the archives. He
may be using that same word Randy was using him.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, morning. I got the Big Show on
the radio coming up. We played John Boy Jeopardy for
one hundred and twenty dollars worth. The Bull's Not cleaning
products made in the USA. Truck drivers keep America moving,
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Look for Bulls Not at truck stops across America, or
download the Bull's Not app. It's click on that banner
(27:54):
at the Big Show dot Com. Hang on, we'll get
you something minutes. Has some good stuff. We got a
lot of cool products. Sticky bulls not what it is boys.
Head into Memorial Day weekend the Coca Cola six hundred.
Little note, we'll be catching up with mister Doug Rice
here just a little bit later this morning. With Christopher
(28:15):
Bell won in North Wilkesboro the All Star Race last weekend.
That's something because he also was a winner of last
year's Coca Cola six hundred. I remember earlier this year
she Chris went on a three race wind Streets Where's
All Star and he matched.
Speaker 2 (28:32):
What it did last year. It's long race.
Speaker 8 (28:35):
It is possible.
Speaker 2 (28:36):
We'll get some picks from Doug a little later this morning.
Speaker 15 (28:39):
A little extra pressure on them.
Speaker 4 (28:40):
Why don't you?
Speaker 1 (28:41):
And coming off our All Star weekend and Tata found
a good old song we made on an All Star weekend,
Gone Pass.
Speaker 2 (28:50):
We were celebrating those yesterday. Check this out.
Speaker 4 (29:00):
Down into the sea, Who's down?
Speaker 12 (29:03):
Up?
Speaker 4 (29:03):
Painte go to be you and me?
Speaker 2 (29:06):
Higher prices I pump they my state when Donald.
Speaker 3 (29:12):
Trump baby, I can't drop dot com guess prices had
gone up to fuck.
Speaker 4 (29:21):
Hex on?
Speaker 5 (29:22):
Do you did you?
Speaker 3 (29:24):
Exony?
Speaker 12 (29:25):
Hey?
Speaker 10 (29:25):
You chit chit chit chi yo.
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Chit chit chichi yo.
Speaker 3 (29:35):
Chit chit chitch yo.
Speaker 2 (29:39):
Chitch Oh man. There's a lot of big Show memories
piled up in that right there. And ain't it Yeah?
All right? Listen, John Boy Jeopardy review.
Speaker 1 (29:53):
Yesterday's question, per capita, the people in this US state
consumed twice as much ice cream as arrested in the nation.
Speaker 2 (30:00):
It was Alaska. Yeah, I was there. They got a
lot of it up there stays cold. Okay, Today's John
Boy Jeopardy Statistically speaking, roughly ten thousand babies will be
born in the US today, and about five hundred of
them will one day call one of these home, sweet home.
Speaker 15 (30:19):
What is your basement?
Speaker 2 (30:22):
That said about right?
Speaker 3 (30:24):
What's you all?
Speaker 2 (30:25):
God?
Speaker 1 (30:25):
One eight hundred Big show you told free line across America.
We played John Boy Jepardy next Good Morning, and that's
(30:56):
a big show on the radio. Ro it to your
Thursday made twenty second could feature track for the Big
Show bit Box.
Speaker 2 (31:02):
There's a show clip titled it.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
If we were gay, search for keywords, if we were
at the Big Box at the.
Speaker 17 (31:09):
Big Show dot com and right now that's black Yes
live across America.
Speaker 2 (31:15):
It's John Boy Jeff and now a man who.
Speaker 4 (31:20):
How do I put this?
Speaker 2 (31:21):
Uh? Hell, he's kind of a big deal. People know him,
and its whole house smells of Rich Mahogan. He's John Boy.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
As I heard a wrangler out of Harrisonburg, Virginia. Good morning,
Wrangler of good morning, Don Boy, Billy, Hey, buddy, welcome,
all right, wrangler. What do you wrangle? Wrangler?
Speaker 2 (31:48):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (31:48):
I wrangled myself days good enough?
Speaker 2 (31:52):
I hear you.
Speaker 1 (31:53):
I think all right, Buddie, Well you got first shot
at John Boy Jeopardy this morning. Statistically speaking, roughly ten
thousand babies will be born in the US today, and
about five hundred of them will one day call one
of these home.
Speaker 2 (32:08):
Sweet home.
Speaker 4 (32:11):
What you think, Ragler?
Speaker 8 (32:16):
Nice word?
Speaker 3 (32:19):
Cool?
Speaker 4 (32:19):
Okay, he's outdoors. Okay, all right, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (32:23):
Now what you say.
Speaker 5 (32:26):
The child home, cheil Prodective Services.
Speaker 17 (32:29):
Child home child like a child home, child protective or
when the government take away it's not fun?
Speaker 2 (32:37):
Okay, well I understand.
Speaker 1 (32:40):
Well, let's consult these surveys. I know was not it,
but it could be as depressing. Well, thank you, wrangler.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
Buddy, you have a great rest of your day. Man
Oh you're good.
Speaker 5 (32:55):
Thank you. You have a good day to buddy.
Speaker 1 (32:57):
All right, Mane, Let's go to Rich. He's in Atanooga, Tennessee.
Good morning, Rich, good morning.
Speaker 3 (33:04):
Nice to talk to you.
Speaker 2 (33:05):
Hey, buddy, good to have you in here. All right, buddy,
you up.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
What do you think ten thousand babies born today one
day wind up one of these calling it home sweet home?
Speaker 2 (33:18):
Prison, show us prison, don't you?
Speaker 1 (33:26):
It could be its depression a traumatic cost all right
here about that's one in twenty or five percent.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
If you want to bring it like that, that's crazy
and it is all right y'all quit that and Rich,
congratulations to you, buddy.
Speaker 1 (33:41):
One hundred and twenty dollars worth of Bull's not headed
over to Chattanooga for you.
Speaker 2 (33:45):
That's wonderful.
Speaker 5 (33:46):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 12 (33:47):
And I keep doing keeping your hutch here show going.
Speaker 19 (33:50):
I love it.
Speaker 5 (33:51):
I don't care where it comes from.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
Appreciate you, buddy. Thanks love Rich, hang on with jacket.
Speaker 4 (34:03):
Why the money?
Speaker 2 (34:03):
Ill word topp of your news?
Speaker 1 (34:05):
Alright, Pillars has got a birthday letter than Jackie on
a birthday right after this report, Good.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
Morning makes shows on the radio. I got Pillars.
Speaker 1 (34:50):
Get ready here, I'll tell you in twenty minutes meet
the new substitute Hope.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
All right now, all right, here.
Speaker 3 (34:58):
We go, Jackie.
Speaker 4 (35:02):
On the occasion of your birthday, I'd like to take
this opportunity to tell you some of the things that
I've been keeping in my heart. We've known each other
for over twenty years. It's hard to believe, and in
that time, I've grown to love you more than I
could ever possibly tell you. You should know that, as
someone who suffers from depression, nothing brings me out of
(35:22):
the darkness like your laugh. I come to work each
day with that goal in mind. You are my best
and most favorite audience. Some of my most memorable times
here have been finding some random thing that entertains you.
And I know when your laugh is real and when
it's that fake that you do now see John Boy
(35:46):
laughs to be polite. Billy's a tough audience. Tater just
laughs what everyone else does because she usually doesn't get it. Hanson,
he doesn't know where he is, but you. Making you
laugh so hard that you leave the studio is like
winning an award. It makes my heart happy and no
(36:08):
one can give me that but you. Over the years,
we haven't just laughed together. We've cried together too. We've
shared the losses of loved ones, two legged and four
blood relation and big show family. You've been my rock,
my very beloved friend, and my confidant. And I always
(36:29):
keep our secrets. When an attractive woman visits the studio,
it's me that you pull aside and tell me what
a cheap skank shift, but to keep it to myself,
Or like remember that time when we were in Orlando
and we got so hammered and we went back to
your room and you were afraid to do that thing
(36:50):
I wanted you to do, but you did it anyway,
and you loved it, and we did it again like
seven times, and you've got that rug burn And I said, hey,
that looks like Charles de Gaulle, And you said.
Speaker 2 (37:00):
Who daddy is?
Speaker 4 (37:03):
And I had to tell you, and then you laughed
and laughed, and then you told me never tell anyone
what we did, because you didn't want everyone to know
that you were a hoe in real life and not
just on the radio. Remember that I never told anyone,
just like you asked. That's what a true friend does, right, Pearl.
(37:28):
We've shared the joy in each other's personal triumphs, like
the way you rubbed my tummy when I won that
rhubarb pieting contest, and afterwards, when I spent so much
time on the crapper, no one else, no one took
the time to stand outside the door and yell, come on,
damn it and encourage them. I'll never forget that wonderful
(37:49):
day when you proudly showed me your new boobs. I
felt so special, well, me and the other thirty to
fifty people in the room, but I knew that you
meant that especially for me. There are no symphonies written,
no songs sung, no rapturous sounds of the birds in nature.
(38:10):
That compares to the melodious tremulo of your voice, so
soft and sultry, alluring and captivating, like Wilfred Brimley after
he'd been kicked in the stones, or or a slightly
more feminine Bernie Macs. That voice that makes the little
catchphrases you say so adorable.
Speaker 21 (38:32):
Like oh guy, and after the Buddha died, And that
sound you make when you get scared.
Speaker 4 (38:48):
It gives me goosebumps. It's like an angel spoke, if
that angel was from rural West Virginia and was shooting
squirrels at the bus stop. A poet once said that
a woman's touch reveals her soul. If that's true, you
are truly destined for sainthood. The many times you walk
(39:10):
behind me in the studio while I'm sitting here and
you give me that friendly, gentle caress across my lower back,
it takes my breath away and makes me peel it.
It's hard for me to believe that these are the
same hands that can palm a basketball, crack a coconut
(39:32):
like a hen's eg, put out a brush fire with
a single swat. I'm so lucky that you haven't accidentally
killed me. Over the years, I've grown to a door
one particular characteristic that you possess something that makes you
so special, not just to me, but to everyone here.
(39:53):
It makes you stand out like no one else I've
ever known. You're stupid, don't misunderstand, not wordy words, stupid,
more like Edith Bunker stupid. When it's crunch time and
everything is on the line, we can always count on
you to screw up. Even your handwriting provides comic relief. Hello,
(40:16):
is this John from Wheeling, West Virginia. No, it's Zeke
from Pasca Goula, Mississippi. When Billy has worked so hard
on an episode of Playhouse, we can always count on
you to be so enthralled by the storyline that you
completely missed the cue. Only when all heads turn and
(40:37):
look at you do you realize what's happened and give
your trademark. Ooh, it's so precious. I knew I'd love
you forever when I had to explain what those cows
were doing in the chicken Flake. Now, because I love
you so much, it's difficult to know what to get
(40:57):
you as a gift. I thought of getting you a
gift card to Barnes and Noble, but since you're so
bad at spelling, I can't imagine you're much at reading.
I'd get you the gift of an adult beverage, but
I think that would be cruel since I know you're
finally trying to dry out after all these years. I
thought about a gift certificate from Victoria's Secret, but clearly
(41:22):
that ship has sailed, and it's sailed south of the
Deep South. So I just got you a visa gift card.
I know you'll probably just use it for fast food,
and that's okay. I mean, who do you have to
look good for anymore? Happy birthday, Jackie. Big Daddy loves you,
(41:46):
even if you're a dumby.
Speaker 1 (42:20):
Good Thursday morning, May twenty second, got the Big Show
on the radio. Well, we have a new Pope and
it's about time. But I've often wondered who fills in
for the pope while they're looking for a new one. Well,
we've found the answer. Welcome to the Big Show, mister
Malcolm w. Norbliss. Have a seat, Malcolm, No mind if
(42:40):
I do. Now, you have a rather unique job.
Speaker 4 (42:43):
That's true. I am the only person who has ever
held this job.
Speaker 2 (42:47):
So you are the stand in pope. Is that the
right way to put it?
Speaker 7 (42:50):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (42:51):
Pretty much. See, I'm the guy who steps into the
pope's position while the cardinals and bishops are looking for
a new poniff.
Speaker 2 (42:57):
So how long have you been doing this?
Speaker 4 (42:59):
Since nineteen seven? I was a young man working my
way across Europe. It was a lovely August day in Rome.
I was filling out an application for the Vatican gift
Shop when the news came that the Pope had died.
A couple of bishops and cardinals took me into a room.
The robes fit and that was pretty much it. Boom,
stand in Pope.
Speaker 2 (43:17):
Wow does it pay well?
Speaker 4 (43:19):
Pretty good? Plus the clothes, it's all robes and stuff.
You know, I'm a big fan of loose fitting clothing
and best of all, one word commando.
Speaker 2 (43:28):
Oh more information than we needed, Malcolm.
Speaker 1 (43:31):
So basically, you've only really worked about two months total
over the last what almost fifty years?
Speaker 4 (43:38):
Jealous?
Speaker 2 (43:39):
No, that's pretty much my story too.
Speaker 4 (43:41):
It's nice.
Speaker 2 (43:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (43:42):
So do you live in the actual Vatican No, no, no,
I have a guest house out back. They call it
the Cato Kalin Suite. It's not very big, but I
do have cable.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
So what do you do all the time? Did I
let you go out?
Speaker 4 (43:56):
And I'm not supposed to, but I sneak out once
in a while, you know, whenever I get a craving
from pizza. There's a Papa John's just down the street.
Speaker 2 (44:03):
So you're in Italy and you go to Papa John's.
Speaker 4 (44:06):
Hard wats what the hard wants?
Speaker 2 (44:09):
It must be boring the rest of the time.
Speaker 4 (44:11):
Oh no, that's not true at all. Every Tuesday is
bowling night. We've got six lanes. We even have teams.
I play with the Vatican Plumbers. We call ourselves the
Holy Craft. Oh Cardinal Papa georgioh he gets a big
kick out of that. On Thursday we get together in
the vestibule and play Canasta. And Friday night is movie night.
Speaker 2 (44:32):
Well that sounds like fun.
Speaker 4 (44:33):
Oh it's hilarious. You know they only watch PG movies.
But a couple of times I snuck in an R
rated one American pie almost got me fired. And though
it's not well known, there was a mall underneath the.
Speaker 2 (44:44):
Vatican, like a regular mall.
Speaker 4 (44:46):
Oh regular mall. We got a gap, we got a
sears a Spencer.
Speaker 2 (44:49):
Gifts Spencer jimps in the Vatican.
Speaker 9 (44:51):
I know, right.
Speaker 4 (44:52):
My favorite part is to catch one of the bishops
looking at the fat girl cards. Hey, they've got an
old fashioned art closes. Cyber came to hearing a pope
cuss was when Pope John Paul the Second was playing
Miss pac Man's do you have any other duties in
your off time? Well, John boy, I fancy myself a
bit of an idea of it. I'm always looking for
(45:15):
ways to put the Vatican in the spotlight.
Speaker 12 (45:17):
Now.
Speaker 4 (45:17):
I remember when the first Batman came out. I suggested
they outfit the Popemobile to look like the Batmobile something
to get the kids attention, you know, and went over
like a turd in a punch bowl. I tried to
get the Pope to be a Grand Marshal in a
NASCAR event, deck out the popemobile like a real competition vehicle,
get a sponsor. But apparently the pimply monk hard Lemonade
(45:37):
Sacramental Wine number seven car was not received like at all?
Speaker 2 (45:43):
Is there anything you don't like about it?
Speaker 4 (45:45):
You know what, there's only one thing. The hats a beanie.
Come on, what are we doing a Little Rascals reboots
and that big cone hat. You know, I'm sure it
looks majestic, but it would it kill you to maybe
trying a ball cap? I mean, the new Pope is
from Chicago, right, sell ball caps at the gift shop
with du Pope on it?
Speaker 2 (46:05):
Who is your favorite Pope?
Speaker 4 (46:07):
Now, darn, We're gonna have to think about it. John
Paul the Second JP Douce, Juan Pablo Dos, John Paul,
George Ringo, great guy Italian, sounded like Chico Marx. That's
a no good. He really knew his way around a
knock knock joe. And guess what a great dance really?
Oh he could merangue like nobody's business. And another tidbit
(46:29):
he was a sleepwalker. I gave him the nickname the
Roman Catholic.
Speaker 5 (46:34):
Get it?
Speaker 20 (46:37):
So what now?
Speaker 4 (46:39):
Well, I'm gonna go back to Wisconsin for a few weeks,
then back to the Vatican.
Speaker 1 (46:43):
I mean, you never know, right, Malcolm w Norbalist, the
stand in Pope, Thanks for stopping by.
Speaker 4 (46:51):
You wouldn't happen to be in the market for forty
thousand bat Pope matchbox cars with that figures. I'll just
show myself.
Speaker 2 (46:57):
Out good morning.
Speaker 1 (47:01):
You got the Big Show on already, have more chances
you to win coming up after your news, weather and sports.
Speaker 2 (47:07):
Oh oh, I didn't know.
Speaker 18 (47:09):
I didn't see you there.
Speaker 4 (47:10):
This is Professor Melwyn handed Day, head of hey ah, oh,
head of Big Show Science and History Division.
Speaker 18 (47:18):
And you're listening to two boys who are destined.
Speaker 4 (47:21):
To be history, don Boy and Billy on the Big Show.
Speaker 5 (47:27):
Yo.
Speaker 4 (47:27):
When I say there will be history, I didn't mean
to buy a negative.
Speaker 3 (47:31):
I simply meant that they they Oh what did I mean?
Speaker 2 (48:09):
Good morning?
Speaker 1 (48:10):
It's a Big Show on the radio celebrating my very
own Jackie Curry. It is her birthday today. She is
exactly one year older than she was last year. Oh,
I don't depended on the mask.
Speaker 2 (48:24):
You could have lost about three or four if you're
looking good.
Speaker 1 (48:28):
We've heard black don't crack. So celebrator got her to
sing one of my favorite songs. Happened to be with
the Darlings from Mayberry. Might have heard of them, bull
tune called Dooley.
Speaker 2 (48:44):
All right, Uh, let's make sure I come in at
the right place.
Speaker 16 (48:48):
Give me.
Speaker 2 (48:49):
I don't know what they can do about it.
Speaker 3 (48:53):
Oh yeah, that Dooley was.
Speaker 2 (49:08):
Good, old man. He little belo on a mill.
Speaker 22 (49:11):
Dooley had two daughters and a forty gallon. Still one
guy watched the boarder, the other watched the spy and
Mama cork the bottles. When all Dooley fetched down my lee,
slipping up to holler to Len, trying to make a
daughter to Leck and us.
Speaker 3 (49:29):
Water I pay back some day.
Speaker 2 (49:50):
The revenewers came for him, and slipping through the woods,
Dooley kept behind.
Speaker 3 (49:55):
Him, mauling, never lost his goood.
Speaker 2 (49:58):
Dooley was a trade. When into town he come sugar
buy the but shove my lasses by the tongue.
Speaker 22 (50:07):
To leave, living un hollered to leave, trying to make
a dollar to leave.
Speaker 2 (50:12):
Give us Swam my pay back some day.
Speaker 22 (50:34):
I remember very well today, Oh dude, he died, comembing
fulklic sorry and man surround and cry, Now do lis
On a mountain he lies her haul along and.
Speaker 2 (50:46):
Put a jump beside him, and a barrel for his.
Speaker 22 (50:49):
Tongue to live, slipping down and holler to live, trying
to make a dollar to lenk and ask for my
pay back some day.
Speaker 4 (51:05):
How do you like from now?
Speaker 3 (51:24):
A right nuck overnight?
Speaker 21 (51:29):
I never told you were friends with j d shall
not chieppole lawns on our side
Speaker 2 (51:35):
Billy now yeah, oh hey,
Good more than everybody if my Big Show family yours.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Thank you for listening. Listen news what sport's coming up?
Speaker 3 (00:08):
Hello?
Speaker 4 (00:10):
Listen Ricky Bates, sharp brother? Oh how about you pot lickers?
Are listening to a couple other pot liquors noted John
boyd Philly on The Big Show. You know, I just
a guest star on the Playhouse and the official mascot
from mister Popular, the pizza Runt. That's just the tip
of the iceberg. But this note from John Boy keep
(00:33):
it short.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
Sun up up, you got the dottle day.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Wow, you got a chicken in your back? Bye? Please
go here?
Speaker 3 (01:29):
Alright here it.
Speaker 1 (01:30):
Is Thursday, right, we'll be celebrating Friday for you know.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
It's see what's sapping?
Speaker 1 (01:37):
Spugialon has made twenty seconds National By and Musical Instrument Day.
It'll be nice a kid. There's never too late you
learn a musical instrument.
Speaker 2 (01:49):
Don't think that.
Speaker 1 (01:55):
National Vanilla Pudding Day and rose some Pudding, the National
Craft Distillery Day. A lot of that going on. It's
like there's like four craft beer deals. What would he
come distilleries? I guess around here there's like four within
the new.
Speaker 5 (02:17):
Breweries.
Speaker 6 (02:18):
Are your your your spirits and your count is way off.
Speaker 4 (02:22):
There's like forty.
Speaker 6 (02:24):
The reason they do that is because of the alcohol laws.
They don't have enough of their own to become a distributor,
so they have to partner together with other brewers to
get enough to meet the quota.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
Well, must be a big clientail is like forty of within.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Yeah, it's huge.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
It's huge right now.
Speaker 7 (02:50):
I don't know if you notice the age range and
living species around our studio here, John, But kind of
young Kennedys like the craft beer. Then they like to
go to a brewery and they'll clubs anymore. It's it's
going and hanging out the brewery and playing some corn
hole and.
Speaker 6 (03:06):
Yeah yeah, and they an'll have like the I p
as all have weird names. You know that that's embarrassing
to yell out, you know for a bartender.
Speaker 4 (03:14):
You know, maybe I need two hot blondes over here.
That's your problem.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
So this craft distillery is making like the moonshine, I
always do that.
Speaker 2 (03:27):
That's distilled, is what you're said. Yeah, all right, all right.
Speaker 1 (03:33):
Well two more national days. National Maritime Day recognizes the
launch of the maritime industry in the US. Hey, everybody,
on the on the ocean. This morning it's National Solitaire Day.
Everybody playing solitaire somewhere.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
That you should be working.
Speaker 8 (03:51):
First thing this morning.
Speaker 2 (03:53):
Okay, well look over here.
Speaker 1 (03:55):
Three days industry saved up. We'll get a first prize.
Back out and get the winning beginning Big Shows on
the radio. Good morning, Big Shows on the radio. First
prize pack. We got a hat, t shirt, tumbler and
a twenty five dollars gas card from my buzz from
law Tigers motorcycle lawyers who ride law Tigers. You never
(04:17):
ride alone. Click on their bounder at the Big Show
dot Com. Getting close to you. Let's look at three
days in history. We're well clean our categories from this morning,
May twenty second. It was nineteen eighty six Silvester Stallone
signed a ten pictures six year deal with the United
Artists were reported fifteen million per film, making him at
(04:39):
the time the richest actor in Hollywood. Wow, they still
know you. Watch you talk about streaming and stuff. You
watch Tulsa King as one of the one of the
Yellowstone Riders.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
What was the name of the show's tulsiteen. Yeah, Taylor's
shared that's one of his. You might like it.
Speaker 9 (04:57):
Raddy.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Yeah, I've got a mob guy. He is, and they
make him go to Oklahoma.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
TELLSA when he gets out of prison and sets up shop,
you know there.
Speaker 4 (05:05):
He doesn't stand out.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
I'm sure.
Speaker 5 (05:08):
Pretty good.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
That's a Tulsa king still working, all right. He's like
seventy three, he says he is on the show. I
guess that's about his real age.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
Could be here too, all right.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
Nineteen ninety seven, the US Postal Service issued a thirty
two cent stamp honoring bugs Bunny right, And then in
six the US Department of Veterans Affairs reported a computer
containing personal information on some twenty six point five million
veterans and spouses had been stolen. Oh six, So yes,
(05:44):
if some of y'all were victims of that and know
it by now, huh, yeah, they cleared it right.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Well, there you go.
Speaker 1 (05:50):
There's that three categories one eight hundred big shows you
told free line. Come on, we'll play out birds next.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Good morning, it is making show on the radio.
Speaker 1 (06:23):
We're on a t your Thursday morning feature track from
the mag show bt Box. The show clip entitled if
we were gay.
Speaker 2 (06:32):
Tur key words, if we were remember this. That's funny, but.
Speaker 6 (06:36):
It is one of my very favorite all time clips
because it was all very spontaneous.
Speaker 2 (06:42):
Yeah, very very funny.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Take it out there at the big bugs said the
Big show Dot coming right now.
Speaker 2 (06:53):
Uppers, Let's play Uppers. It's the game that anyone can win.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Shoon boys, really to give you prices from the big
prize Beam.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Let's go contested number one.
Speaker 3 (07:08):
This should really be a lot of fun.
Speaker 1 (07:11):
You're playing out the tablry up.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
And guest time you have the best time.
Speaker 3 (07:17):
You have a big shot.
Speaker 1 (07:20):
Let's say, heard the dumb from break court in South Carolina.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
We shots, Good morning, dub.
Speaker 5 (07:36):
What's going on?
Speaker 4 (07:38):
Gone boy?
Speaker 2 (07:40):
You are right at this moment, dumb? Can you feel it?
Speaker 5 (07:45):
I can't feed it all the way from here, man,
like you slap me outside the head.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
You know that's the effect I was hoping for, Dumb,
best one.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
So now I can barely understand you. We're gonna go
through these three categories.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
Yeah, I'm feeling it all right, double Come on, buddy,
were pulling for you. So now you got five seconds
per category, So here we go. You know I have
a slow trigger finger. Sometime you feel it, So if
you can in five.
Speaker 5 (08:26):
Seconds whim duke a light count it at these phones.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
I have no idea forever.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
All right, Well, Doug, give us three slice stallone movies
ready go.
Speaker 5 (08:48):
Rocky one, rock you two around one?
Speaker 10 (08:55):
All right?
Speaker 2 (08:56):
Good word? Up here we go right now.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
Give us three famous rabbits ready by.
Speaker 5 (09:07):
Pleased? Good Burney and Roger Racket.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
Okay, you've got about Roger. All right, good workd Ubb.
We go for the wind. Three things stored on a computer,
ready go.
Speaker 5 (09:23):
Partial information, a resume.
Speaker 4 (09:30):
Okay, yeah, and.
Speaker 6 (09:39):
Tax forms, pictures.
Speaker 11 (09:41):
And okay, we are giving you that big old log
Tiger prize package headed down the great court.
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Buddy, congratulations, Man, what do Jackie?
Speaker 1 (10:09):
Jackie is gonna tell you all about it? Get all
the info right now, Buddy, I'm gonna put your own hold.
Speaker 5 (10:16):
Boy, I gotta ask you a question.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
I go ahead.
Speaker 5 (10:20):
What are you gonna stop playing Pink Floyd and Leed's
every single morning? Hal never.
Speaker 4 (10:29):
When the program directors put us in charge?
Speaker 2 (10:35):
Yes, about how it was correct? Never started it?
Speaker 3 (10:42):
You jack God luck.
Speaker 1 (10:48):
The most important person in the room this morning. She's
back there on the phone with Dub right now. Still
Jackie Curry's birthday, Jackie, his birthday today.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
Look how it is starting out? Awesome, awesome, You've taken
this gets you.
Speaker 1 (11:09):
Really don't have to celebrate me.
Speaker 4 (11:11):
I swear, just let me go home.
Speaker 1 (11:15):
You say, don't get your tribute.
Speaker 12 (11:48):
This is the award winning Joah Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 13 (12:05):
Welcome to John Boy and Billy Playhouse. Today's episode, Ricky
bees crying Jack. As our story opens, Ricky B. Sharp's
wife Lucy has been awakened at four a m. By
a mysterious sound coming from the Sharp kitchen in Bilthan, Alabama.
Speaker 14 (12:25):
Ah, Ricky, Recky, Hello, Hell.
Speaker 4 (12:40):
Hello, I'm here in the kitchen Lucy or Sharp.
Speaker 15 (12:48):
Honey? Are you crying?
Speaker 4 (12:50):
No, I'm pup.
Speaker 15 (12:54):
Go back to band, Ricky, What in the world is wrong?
Speaker 2 (12:58):
I said, go back to band, sweetheart? What is it?
Speaker 4 (13:02):
I just woke up. I couldn't go back to sleep.
Speaker 15 (13:07):
Well, why are you crying?
Speaker 5 (13:09):
Will?
Speaker 4 (13:13):
I'm just having a tearful moment on memory late, if
you must know, I just realized that tomorrow is June
the first, the anniversary of a big moment in my life.
It was back when you and me would jumped out
of high school June first, nineteen eighty two. Was it
not me and you done? The fud Rutger for the
first time, the fud rucker, the horizontal mambo to tackle me,
(13:37):
Elmo the beast with two backs to get you up you.
Speaker 15 (13:41):
Made the first time. We beat it, and that's what's
making you cry.
Speaker 4 (13:45):
Yeah, I'll never forget that night you wore that black
skinnered T shirt and the metopant bell bottom. We twinned
up down the partially finished basement watching Donnie and Marie.
Next thing you know, we was bowed up and going
at it. I remember, and you probably remember when your
Naddy come a beryland down the stairs, call her said
(14:06):
what the French folks call the fragrant delictor.
Speaker 15 (14:10):
Yet he was pretty mad.
Speaker 4 (14:12):
Telling me, grabbed me by the scruff of my berry
GiB mullet, swung me over his head like it was
like I was a dead cat, and he was on
Finn trying to get rid of a ward and they
would That is from Tom Sawyer, which you know, if
you'd ever read anything longer than the TV section of
the Sunday.
Speaker 15 (14:27):
Paper, well you always was the literate one of the family.
Speaker 4 (14:31):
Anyways, Beg Daddy sets you upstairs and went to wailing
on me like a rended mule. See that scene of
the Avengers when the grab LOKEI by the scrap of
the neck and beat him. That's what happened. That man
beat me. Ain't wait for Sunday.
Speaker 15 (14:43):
I remember what a racket.
Speaker 4 (14:45):
Then he got right up in my face there and
he leading down to Logston boy, that there's my little girl.
She deserves to be treated right. Don't include some piply
little corn dog trying to get frisky. Then he said,
do you love her? And I said, yes, sir, more
than anything.
Speaker 15 (15:03):
In the world. Oh you said that, yes, ma'am.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
Your daddy said, look a here, boy, if you love her,
you better do right by her. Ask her to marry you.
Because if I get you pulling another stut like I
guess you little cherry picker. And that's where I got
that in front of your dad, I'll make sure you
spend the next thirty years in prison.
Speaker 15 (15:22):
Wow. And it was the very next day you asked
me to bury you.
Speaker 4 (15:26):
Uh huh. And I just turned that over in my mind.
You know i'd be getting out today.
Speaker 2 (15:39):
We hope you've enjoyed John Boy and Billy Playhouse.
Speaker 4 (15:42):
You ain't still got that skinner shirt down chilling?
Speaker 13 (15:46):
Then again next time when we'll hear the crusty old
guy at Things Remembered at the mall.
Speaker 2 (15:51):
Say, hey, diick man, let me hold a dollar.
Speaker 15 (15:55):
Cherry picker, John Boy and.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Billy Shoot them, John Boys, shoot him, shoot him, shoot them.
Speaker 8 (16:02):
Good morning radio, dumb right, good morning.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
That's a big show on the radio in minutes on
Jackie's birthday, The Story of Jackie and right now.
Speaker 16 (16:42):
Animal Channel presents the Crocodile Stalker traveling around the world
in search of exotic wildlife, then annoying the crap.
Speaker 17 (16:52):
Out of them.
Speaker 2 (16:53):
Now, dear Steve, thank you, loving good night Steve.
Speaker 4 (16:57):
Here in the wilds of Arkansas, home of the razorbacks,
poor education, and disgraced American presidents, and today we're looking
for that legendary creature, the snipe. Hold on, I know
what you're thinking, Old Steve has falling for the oldest
joke in a book. But don't worry. I'm on to them.
(17:18):
I just don't want to spoil their fun. Some of
the boys even hooked me up with a local expert
from right here in Millsburg. What a character, and here
he comes.
Speaker 18 (17:26):
Now, how you doing out here, mister crocodile Feller?
Speaker 4 (17:30):
Not too shabby.
Speaker 18 (17:31):
How are you, Karl, I'm tallerm All Rickon. I like
the way you talk right.
Speaker 4 (17:36):
Back at you. Well, your boss, mister Cox says, besides
being a mechanical whiz, you're just about the best snipe
hunter in the state.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
I do all right.
Speaker 18 (17:45):
You just gotta be a little smarter than the snipers. All,
I guess I'm.
Speaker 8 (17:48):
A little smarter.
Speaker 4 (17:50):
Well, I brought my gear along for the big snipe hunt.
Purl that bag, flashlight and a whistle. You know something,
Master for being on TV and all you ain't very smart.
You go, honey snipes for that miss, and now put
a real heart on you. You make them say it's
so dangerous. Aren't they just little flightless buds like a
(18:11):
key we back home?
Speaker 10 (18:12):
These ain't damn little sissy yankee snipes, mister, These is
them Arkansas razor beak snipes. Well, what's the difference, Well, sir,
I got a sharp beak and claws that'll plump slash
you to ribbons.
Speaker 2 (18:24):
Krikey.
Speaker 4 (18:25):
I guess we'll just have to call it off and
come back another time.
Speaker 10 (18:29):
No, no need for that.
Speaker 18 (18:31):
There you go, mister cronfeller.
Speaker 10 (18:33):
I recognize all you being needing. What's this kaiser blade?
Some folks calls it a sling blade. I called it
the kaiser blade.
Speaker 3 (18:41):
Yeah, and what do I do with it?
Speaker 10 (18:43):
Well, sir, when that old mister Snipe here's at a
whistle sees out of flashlights, he'll come a barreling out
of them bush's iron your best bet. There's a heck
off that beak before he can hiskey bob ye, and
you can chop his leg off so you can't claw
your iners out. Then you take a sharp edge cut
his head clean off. Well here in the commotion. By
(19:06):
that time we'll come here be dressing my out her
goodwood mustard A well, wish me like got I put
my armor on you before I set off out of here.
Speaker 4 (19:16):
Let's see how the hunt goes first, Okay, all right, then,
oh brother, talk about drama. I better get rid of
this nasty blady before someone gets hurt. Here we go
now on with the charade, flashlight on and here.
Speaker 18 (19:35):
Snipe, snipe, snipe, snipe?
Speaker 4 (19:41):
What fun? I better having a real life. What a
great bunch of blokes? Yeah, what what's this?
Speaker 8 (19:50):
Cracky?
Speaker 4 (19:50):
You are not going to believe these, but I think
these might be real snipes brown and round in that
long beak. What a bunch of little ravers. Hold on
a second, you chick, chick, chick chick, Come on, here
we go, Here we go. Yeah, I've got I've got one.
Oh he's adorable and the beak sure does look sharp.
(20:12):
I'll just touch it with the end of my finger. Huh,
right straight through. I'll just h that's smart's take it
out and remember to keep that beak away from my
hands and my face. I'm gonna put this rascal in
(20:34):
that second before he decides to cut loose with those.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
Claws.
Speaker 4 (20:42):
Oh, chimney whiskers. Well, I'm not taking any more chances.
I'll just scoop up the whole lot of them here
we are and put them in this bag.
Speaker 10 (20:53):
I have it, dinge, mister Kropfeller, What you got to say?
I hit be totaled if I don't give out first.
Speaker 4 (21:00):
Well, Carl, it looks like that joke's on you.
Speaker 18 (21:03):
Look in this baggy at real snipes, mister, Then just youngins.
How can you tell?
Speaker 10 (21:11):
Because of grown up ones?
Speaker 2 (21:13):
Looks like that.
Speaker 4 (21:16):
Holy crap, she's at least nine feet tall, like a
cross between an ostrich a Tarradectyl and Barbara streisand horror.
I thought this was some kind of a joke.
Speaker 18 (21:27):
No, sir, some kind of burn.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
Well, well, what do I do now? You want to
drop that poke?
Speaker 18 (21:33):
That mama saying what did you catch my?
Speaker 10 (21:36):
Youngins firm?
Speaker 19 (21:36):
What did you catch me? Young sir?
Speaker 18 (21:38):
I'm like, all right there now what I have had
her with that kinder blade?
Speaker 7 (21:44):
What?
Speaker 3 (21:44):
Throw it away? What do I do?
Speaker 2 (21:47):
Close your eyes?
Speaker 4 (21:48):
If I do?
Speaker 2 (21:49):
Will she leave me alone? Know sir? But at least
you won't have to watch yourself get in dowar apart.
Speaker 3 (21:56):
Lucky me.
Speaker 2 (22:18):
Nothing it matters now?
Speaker 18 (22:19):
But could you hold them away from both?
Speaker 2 (22:21):
Thanks?
Speaker 3 (22:22):
All right, Dan.
Speaker 16 (22:23):
Tune in again next week for another episode of The
Crocodile Stalkers.
Speaker 1 (22:35):
Good morning, you got the Big Show on the radio.
More chances for you to win coming up after your news,
weather and sports.
Speaker 4 (22:42):
Good morning.
Speaker 9 (22:44):
Thisious Connery Sean Connery. And you might think that I'm
just another of sophisticated yet rugged Scottish movie star, and
you'd be right. What's my secret? The truth is I
can't stop my day without listening to the Big Show
with John Boy and Billy crush Me. They're a lot
funnier than doctor Noan blofeld oo aho ah.
Speaker 2 (23:41):
Good morning. That's to make it shown right.
Speaker 1 (23:45):
Welcome out, Thursday morning, May twenty seconds, Jaggie's birthday.
Speaker 19 (23:53):
I was just always just sitting around here talking, you know,
pontificating as we often do.
Speaker 17 (23:57):
When he says we, he means he. He was holding
his scepter, wearing his cape just before putting his crown on,
and telling us how grateful we should all be.
Speaker 19 (24:07):
Me and Randy been going out a little bit, you know,
and I just was trying to name some you know,
good things that I've done, and one of it was
my idea. And I discovered Jackie, and I think my
first response was like this, yeah, that's the way I
remember it.
Speaker 18 (24:21):
Yeah right, yeah, remember everybody around me was having fun.
Speaker 4 (24:27):
Yeah no, I think I said, well, you know, I
need some help. You're killing me.
Speaker 6 (24:30):
Please, I gotta get some help.
Speaker 2 (24:31):
He I'm all right.
Speaker 4 (24:33):
Line, I said, well, I'm thinking about this.
Speaker 17 (24:35):
That girl used to be the perceptionist in that Jackie.
Speaker 4 (24:37):
And he said she's black.
Speaker 17 (24:42):
I know, but you know she's real conscientious and work
really hard.
Speaker 4 (24:49):
She don't having boobs.
Speaker 2 (24:52):
I'm not really interested in, you know, what she looks like.
Speaker 18 (24:55):
I'm just I know I'm gonna wind up having a
bar so.
Speaker 4 (25:01):
And he had that here and putting up on the rack.
Speaker 17 (25:04):
I'll figure that's serious tone that y'all never ever get
to hear it. But I get to hear when I
go over to his house. When I've absolutely had it
with him. I go over to his house say, okay,
back porch. Now I'm going to back porch, and you know,
san to to toe, and he gets that serious voice.
Speaker 4 (25:20):
He went, don't you know any baby dolls?
Speaker 9 (25:26):
I did not.
Speaker 2 (25:27):
He just making that stuff up jagging.
Speaker 20 (25:29):
You know, when I was answering the phones used to
I sweety, I love you, and I thought, oh, he
is so sweet.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
He really likes me.
Speaker 20 (25:36):
So one of them answering the phones and he's going upstairs.
Here comes this baby doll downstairs. Baby, I just love you,
And my head jerked up and look, I thought he
was so sweet to me.
Speaker 4 (25:46):
It's all the girls. Oh yeah, the man when he leaves.
Speaker 2 (25:55):
I was trying to make you jealous.
Speaker 20 (25:57):
Well, and you succeeded, and I guarantee you try to
talk him out of hiring me.
Speaker 4 (26:07):
And then occasionally with throwing the how much is that
gonna come.
Speaker 2 (26:12):
I tell you what, Jack, the best thing ever happened
to us? I mean me personally, I mean y'all. I
know we're all in this, and y'all are the best
things that ever happened to us.
Speaker 17 (26:21):
The kind of people you've said, yeah, whatever, didn't get
to the part where this, Yeah, that's.
Speaker 2 (26:26):
Why I stop him.
Speaker 17 (26:29):
The kind of people he he suggests we hire are
people we can't even mention on the air anymore.
Speaker 4 (26:35):
They were banned from the building and from the program.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
He knows all about Maters.
Speaker 4 (26:42):
Yeah, that one's coming.
Speaker 2 (26:47):
Anyway. Hey is Thanksgiving? Whatever?
Speaker 4 (26:52):
What Thanksgiving dinner is usually like it's a big fight.
Speaker 5 (26:54):
At the end.
Speaker 4 (26:55):
As I screamed at you when you left the room.
Speaker 17 (26:57):
You know, well, besides the word I yelled at you
that I can't say on the radia, this is pretty much.
Speaker 2 (27:01):
All I got.
Speaker 4 (27:02):
Don't take any of the little pieces away from doing
a great job. Man, fact I don't want to hear
it now.
Speaker 5 (27:08):
Five man?
Speaker 2 (27:10):
Okay, well where are we stable? We at the fifty
one thirty break?
Speaker 3 (27:15):
Are we going?
Speaker 1 (27:16):
No way?
Speaker 5 (27:16):
Hit?
Speaker 10 (27:16):
No?
Speaker 3 (27:17):
Yeah, well you might need a higher steve.
Speaker 4 (27:21):
You said we got to bring in this a.
Speaker 19 (27:23):
Young kids in the other booth and I can't hear him.
Speaker 2 (27:27):
Yes, where we are.
Speaker 4 (27:28):
Don't ask the producer, No, I ask the archives. He
may be using that same word Randy was using him.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, morning. I got the Big Show on
the radio coming up. We played John Boy Jeopardy for
one hundred and twenty dollars worth. The Bull's Not cleaning
products made in the USA. Truck drivers keep America moving,
and bulls not. Make sure they look good doing it.
Look for Bulls Not at truck stops across America, or
download the Bull's Not app. It's click on that banner
(27:54):
at the Big Show dot Com. Hang on, we'll get
you something minutes. Has some good stuff. We got a
lot of cool products. Sticky bulls not what it is boys.
Head into Memorial Day weekend the Coca Cola six hundred.
Little note, we'll be catching up with mister Doug Rice
here just a little bit later this morning. With Christopher
(28:15):
Bell won in North Wilkesboro the All Star Race last weekend.
That's something because he also was a winner of last
year's Coca Cola six hundred. I remember earlier this year
she Chris went on a three race wind Streets Where's
All Star and he matched.
Speaker 2 (28:32):
What it did last year. It's long race.
Speaker 8 (28:35):
It is possible.
Speaker 2 (28:36):
We'll get some picks from Doug a little later this morning.
Speaker 15 (28:39):
A little extra pressure on them.
Speaker 4 (28:40):
Why don't you?
Speaker 1 (28:41):
And coming off our All Star weekend and Tata found
a good old song we made on an All Star weekend,
Gone Pass.
Speaker 2 (28:50):
We were celebrating those yesterday. Check this out.
Speaker 4 (29:00):
Down into the sea, Who's down?
Speaker 12 (29:03):
Up?
Speaker 4 (29:03):
Painte go to be you and me?
Speaker 2 (29:06):
Higher prices I pump they my state when Donald.
Speaker 3 (29:12):
Trump baby, I can't drop dot com guess prices had
gone up to fuck.
Speaker 4 (29:21):
Hex on?
Speaker 5 (29:22):
Do you did you?
Speaker 3 (29:24):
Exony?
Speaker 12 (29:25):
Hey?
Speaker 10 (29:25):
You chit chit chit chi yo.
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Chit chit chichi yo.
Speaker 3 (29:35):
Chit chit chitch yo.
Speaker 2 (29:39):
Chitch Oh man. There's a lot of big Show memories
piled up in that right there. And ain't it Yeah?
All right? Listen, John Boy Jeopardy review.
Speaker 1 (29:53):
Yesterday's question, per capita, the people in this US state
consumed twice as much ice cream as arrested in the nation.
Speaker 2 (30:00):
It was Alaska. Yeah, I was there. They got a
lot of it up there stays cold. Okay, Today's John
Boy Jeopardy Statistically speaking, roughly ten thousand babies will be
born in the US today, and about five hundred of
them will one day call one of these home, sweet home.
Speaker 15 (30:19):
What is your basement?
Speaker 2 (30:22):
That said about right?
Speaker 3 (30:24):
What's you all?
Speaker 2 (30:25):
God?
Speaker 1 (30:25):
One eight hundred Big show you told free line across America.
We played John Boy Jepardy next Good Morning, and that's
(30:56):
a big show on the radio. Ro it to your
Thursday made twenty second could feature track for the Big
Show bit Box.
Speaker 2 (31:02):
There's a show clip titled it.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
If we were gay, search for keywords, if we were
at the Big Box at the.
Speaker 17 (31:09):
Big Show dot com and right now that's black Yes
live across America.
Speaker 2 (31:15):
It's John Boy Jeff and now a man who.
Speaker 4 (31:20):
How do I put this?
Speaker 2 (31:21):
Uh? Hell, he's kind of a big deal. People know him,
and its whole house smells of Rich Mahogan. He's John Boy.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
As I heard a wrangler out of Harrisonburg, Virginia. Good morning,
Wrangler of good morning, Don Boy, Billy, Hey, buddy, welcome,
all right, wrangler. What do you wrangle? Wrangler?
Speaker 2 (31:48):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (31:48):
I wrangled myself days good enough?
Speaker 2 (31:52):
I hear you.
Speaker 1 (31:53):
I think all right, Buddie, Well you got first shot
at John Boy Jeopardy this morning. Statistically speaking, roughly ten
thousand babies will be born in the US today, and
about five hundred of them will one day call one
of these home.
Speaker 2 (32:08):
Sweet home.
Speaker 4 (32:11):
What you think, Ragler?
Speaker 8 (32:16):
Nice word?
Speaker 3 (32:19):
Cool?
Speaker 4 (32:19):
Okay, he's outdoors. Okay, all right, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2 (32:23):
Now what you say.
Speaker 5 (32:26):
The child home, cheil Prodective Services.
Speaker 17 (32:29):
Child home child like a child home, child protective or
when the government take away it's not fun?
Speaker 2 (32:37):
Okay, well I understand.
Speaker 1 (32:40):
Well, let's consult these surveys. I know was not it,
but it could be as depressing. Well, thank you, wrangler.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
Buddy, you have a great rest of your day. Man
Oh you're good.
Speaker 5 (32:55):
Thank you. You have a good day to buddy.
Speaker 1 (32:57):
All right, Mane, Let's go to Rich. He's in Atanooga, Tennessee.
Good morning, Rich, good morning.
Speaker 3 (33:04):
Nice to talk to you.
Speaker 2 (33:05):
Hey, buddy, good to have you in here. All right, buddy,
you up.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
What do you think ten thousand babies born today one
day wind up one of these calling it home sweet home?
Speaker 2 (33:18):
Prison, show us prison, don't you?
Speaker 1 (33:26):
It could be its depression a traumatic cost all right
here about that's one in twenty or five percent.
Speaker 2 (33:33):
If you want to bring it like that, that's crazy
and it is all right y'all quit that and Rich,
congratulations to you, buddy.
Speaker 1 (33:41):
One hundred and twenty dollars worth of Bull's not headed
over to Chattanooga for you.
Speaker 2 (33:45):
That's wonderful.
Speaker 5 (33:46):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 12 (33:47):
And I keep doing keeping your hutch here show going.
Speaker 19 (33:50):
I love it.
Speaker 5 (33:51):
I don't care where it comes from.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
Appreciate you, buddy. Thanks love Rich, hang on with jacket.
Speaker 4 (34:03):
Why the money?
Speaker 2 (34:03):
Ill word topp of your news?
Speaker 1 (34:05):
Alright, Pillars has got a birthday letter than Jackie on
a birthday right after this report, Good.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
Morning makes shows on the radio. I got Pillars.
Speaker 1 (34:50):
Get ready here, I'll tell you in twenty minutes meet
the new substitute Hope.
Speaker 2 (34:57):
All right now, all right, here.
Speaker 3 (34:58):
We go, Jackie.
Speaker 4 (35:02):
On the occasion of your birthday, I'd like to take
this opportunity to tell you some of the things that
I've been keeping in my heart. We've known each other
for over twenty years. It's hard to believe, and in
that time, I've grown to love you more than I
could ever possibly tell you. You should know that, as
someone who suffers from depression, nothing brings me out of
(35:22):
the darkness like your laugh. I come to work each
day with that goal in mind. You are my best
and most favorite audience. Some of my most memorable times
here have been finding some random thing that entertains you.
And I know when your laugh is real and when
it's that fake that you do now see John Boy
(35:46):
laughs to be polite. Billy's a tough audience. Tater just
laughs what everyone else does because she usually doesn't get it. Hanson,
he doesn't know where he is, but you. Making you
laugh so hard that you leave the studio is like
winning an award. It makes my heart happy and no
(36:08):
one can give me that but you. Over the years,
we haven't just laughed together. We've cried together too. We've
shared the losses of loved ones, two legged and four
blood relation and big show family. You've been my rock,
my very beloved friend, and my confidant. And I always
(36:29):
keep our secrets. When an attractive woman visits the studio,
it's me that you pull aside and tell me what
a cheap skank shift, but to keep it to myself,
Or like remember that time when we were in Orlando
and we got so hammered and we went back to
your room and you were afraid to do that thing
(36:50):
I wanted you to do, but you did it anyway,
and you loved it, and we did it again like
seven times, and you've got that rug burn And I said, hey,
that looks like Charles de Gaulle, And you said.
Speaker 2 (37:00):
Who daddy is?
Speaker 4 (37:03):
And I had to tell you, and then you laughed
and laughed, and then you told me never tell anyone
what we did, because you didn't want everyone to know
that you were a hoe in real life and not
just on the radio. Remember that I never told anyone,
just like you asked. That's what a true friend does, right, Pearl.
(37:28):
We've shared the joy in each other's personal triumphs, like
the way you rubbed my tummy when I won that
rhubarb pieting contest, and afterwards, when I spent so much
time on the crapper, no one else, no one took
the time to stand outside the door and yell, come on,
damn it and encourage them. I'll never forget that wonderful
(37:49):
day when you proudly showed me your new boobs. I
felt so special, well, me and the other thirty to
fifty people in the room, but I knew that you
meant that especially for me. There are no symphonies written,
no songs sung, no rapturous sounds of the birds in nature.
(38:10):
That compares to the melodious tremulo of your voice, so
soft and sultry, alluring and captivating, like Wilfred Brimley after
he'd been kicked in the stones, or or a slightly
more feminine Bernie Macs. That voice that makes the little
catchphrases you say so adorable.
Speaker 21 (38:32):
Like oh guy, and after the Buddha died, And that
sound you make when you get scared.
Speaker 4 (38:48):
It gives me goosebumps. It's like an angel spoke, if
that angel was from rural West Virginia and was shooting
squirrels at the bus stop. A poet once said that
a woman's touch reveals her soul. If that's true, you
are truly destined for sainthood. The many times you walk
(39:10):
behind me in the studio while I'm sitting here and
you give me that friendly, gentle caress across my lower back,
it takes my breath away and makes me peel it.
It's hard for me to believe that these are the
same hands that can palm a basketball, crack a coconut
(39:32):
like a hen's eg, put out a brush fire with
a single swat. I'm so lucky that you haven't accidentally
killed me. Over the years, I've grown to a door
one particular characteristic that you possess something that makes you
so special, not just to me, but to everyone here.
(39:53):
It makes you stand out like no one else I've
ever known. You're stupid, don't misunderstand, not wordy words, stupid,
more like Edith Bunker stupid. When it's crunch time and
everything is on the line, we can always count on
you to screw up. Even your handwriting provides comic relief. Hello,
(40:16):
is this John from Wheeling, West Virginia. No, it's Zeke
from Pasca Goula, Mississippi. When Billy has worked so hard
on an episode of Playhouse, we can always count on
you to be so enthralled by the storyline that you
completely missed the cue. Only when all heads turn and
(40:37):
look at you do you realize what's happened and give
your trademark. Ooh, it's so precious. I knew I'd love
you forever when I had to explain what those cows
were doing in the chicken Flake. Now, because I love
you so much, it's difficult to know what to get
(40:57):
you as a gift. I thought of getting you a
gift card to Barnes and Noble, but since you're so
bad at spelling, I can't imagine you're much at reading.
I'd get you the gift of an adult beverage, but
I think that would be cruel since I know you're
finally trying to dry out after all these years. I
thought about a gift certificate from Victoria's Secret, but clearly
(41:22):
that ship has sailed, and it's sailed south of the
Deep South. So I just got you a visa gift card.
I know you'll probably just use it for fast food,
and that's okay. I mean, who do you have to
look good for anymore? Happy birthday, Jackie. Big Daddy loves you,
(41:46):
even if you're a dumby.
Speaker 1 (42:20):
Good Thursday morning, May twenty second, got the Big Show
on the radio. Well, we have a new Pope and
it's about time. But I've often wondered who fills in
for the pope while they're looking for a new one. Well,
we've found the answer. Welcome to the Big Show, mister
Malcolm w. Norbliss. Have a seat, Malcolm, No mind if
(42:40):
I do. Now, you have a rather unique job.
Speaker 4 (42:43):
That's true. I am the only person who has ever
held this job.
Speaker 2 (42:47):
So you are the stand in pope. Is that the
right way to put it?
Speaker 7 (42:50):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (42:51):
Pretty much. See, I'm the guy who steps into the
pope's position while the cardinals and bishops are looking for
a new poniff.
Speaker 2 (42:57):
So how long have you been doing this?
Speaker 4 (42:59):
Since nineteen seven? I was a young man working my
way across Europe. It was a lovely August day in Rome.
I was filling out an application for the Vatican gift
Shop when the news came that the Pope had died.
A couple of bishops and cardinals took me into a room.
The robes fit and that was pretty much it. Boom,
stand in Pope.
Speaker 2 (43:17):
Wow does it pay well?
Speaker 4 (43:19):
Pretty good? Plus the clothes, it's all robes and stuff.
You know, I'm a big fan of loose fitting clothing
and best of all, one word commando.
Speaker 2 (43:28):
Oh more information than we needed, Malcolm.
Speaker 1 (43:31):
So basically, you've only really worked about two months total
over the last what almost fifty years?
Speaker 4 (43:38):
Jealous?
Speaker 2 (43:39):
No, that's pretty much my story too.
Speaker 4 (43:41):
It's nice.
Speaker 2 (43:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (43:42):
So do you live in the actual Vatican No, no, no,
I have a guest house out back. They call it
the Cato Kalin Suite. It's not very big, but I
do have cable.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
So what do you do all the time? Did I
let you go out?
Speaker 4 (43:56):
And I'm not supposed to, but I sneak out once
in a while, you know, whenever I get a craving
from pizza. There's a Papa John's just down the street.
Speaker 2 (44:03):
So you're in Italy and you go to Papa John's.
Speaker 4 (44:06):
Hard wats what the hard wants?
Speaker 2 (44:09):
It must be boring the rest of the time.
Speaker 4 (44:11):
Oh no, that's not true at all. Every Tuesday is
bowling night. We've got six lanes. We even have teams.
I play with the Vatican Plumbers. We call ourselves the
Holy Craft. Oh Cardinal Papa georgioh he gets a big
kick out of that. On Thursday we get together in
the vestibule and play Canasta. And Friday night is movie night.
Speaker 2 (44:32):
Well that sounds like fun.
Speaker 4 (44:33):
Oh it's hilarious. You know they only watch PG movies.
But a couple of times I snuck in an R
rated one American pie almost got me fired. And though
it's not well known, there was a mall underneath the.
Speaker 2 (44:44):
Vatican, like a regular mall.
Speaker 4 (44:46):
Oh regular mall. We got a gap, we got a
sears a Spencer.
Speaker 2 (44:49):
Gifts Spencer jimps in the Vatican.
Speaker 9 (44:51):
I know, right.
Speaker 4 (44:52):
My favorite part is to catch one of the bishops
looking at the fat girl cards. Hey, they've got an
old fashioned art closes. Cyber came to hearing a pope
cuss was when Pope John Paul the Second was playing
Miss pac Man's do you have any other duties in
your off time? Well, John boy, I fancy myself a
bit of an idea of it. I'm always looking for
(45:15):
ways to put the Vatican in the spotlight.
Speaker 12 (45:17):
Now.
Speaker 4 (45:17):
I remember when the first Batman came out. I suggested
they outfit the Popemobile to look like the Batmobile something
to get the kids attention, you know, and went over
like a turd in a punch bowl. I tried to
get the Pope to be a Grand Marshal in a
NASCAR event, deck out the popemobile like a real competition vehicle,
get a sponsor. But apparently the pimply monk hard Lemonade
(45:37):
Sacramental Wine number seven car was not received like at all?
Speaker 2 (45:43):
Is there anything you don't like about it?
Speaker 4 (45:45):
You know what, there's only one thing. The hats a beanie.
Come on, what are we doing a Little Rascals reboots
and that big cone hat. You know, I'm sure it
looks majestic, but it would it kill you to maybe
trying a ball cap? I mean, the new Pope is
from Chicago, right, sell ball caps at the gift shop
with du Pope on it?
Speaker 2 (46:05):
Who is your favorite Pope?
Speaker 4 (46:07):
Now, darn, We're gonna have to think about it. John
Paul the Second JP Douce, Juan Pablo Dos, John Paul,
George Ringo, great guy Italian, sounded like Chico Marx. That's
a no good. He really knew his way around a
knock knock joe. And guess what a great dance really?
Oh he could merangue like nobody's business. And another tidbit
(46:29):
he was a sleepwalker. I gave him the nickname the
Roman Catholic.
Speaker 5 (46:34):
Get it?
Speaker 20 (46:37):
So what now?
Speaker 4 (46:39):
Well, I'm gonna go back to Wisconsin for a few weeks,
then back to the Vatican.
Speaker 1 (46:43):
I mean, you never know, right, Malcolm w Norbalist, the
stand in Pope, Thanks for stopping by.
Speaker 4 (46:51):
You wouldn't happen to be in the market for forty
thousand bat Pope matchbox cars with that figures. I'll just
show myself.
Speaker 2 (46:57):
Out good morning.
Speaker 1 (47:01):
You got the Big Show on already, have more chances
you to win coming up after your news, weather and sports.
Speaker 2 (47:07):
Oh oh, I didn't know.
Speaker 18 (47:09):
I didn't see you there.
Speaker 4 (47:10):
This is Professor Melwyn handed Day, head of hey ah, oh,
head of Big Show Science and History Division.
Speaker 18 (47:18):
And you're listening to two boys who are destined.
Speaker 4 (47:21):
To be history, don Boy and Billy on the Big Show.
Speaker 5 (47:27):
Yo.
Speaker 4 (47:27):
When I say there will be history, I didn't mean
to buy a negative.
Speaker 3 (47:31):
I simply meant that they they Oh what did I mean?
Speaker 2 (48:09):
Good morning?
Speaker 1 (48:10):
It's a Big Show on the radio celebrating my very
own Jackie Curry. It is her birthday today. She is
exactly one year older than she was last year. Oh,
I don't depended on the mask.
Speaker 2 (48:24):
You could have lost about three or four if you're
looking good.
Speaker 1 (48:28):
We've heard black don't crack. So celebrator got her to
sing one of my favorite songs. Happened to be with
the Darlings from Mayberry. Might have heard of them, bull
tune called Dooley.
Speaker 2 (48:44):
All right, Uh, let's make sure I come in at
the right place.
Speaker 16 (48:48):
Give me.
Speaker 2 (48:49):
I don't know what they can do about it.
Speaker 3 (48:53):
Oh yeah, that Dooley was.
Speaker 2 (49:08):
Good, old man. He little belo on a mill.
Speaker 22 (49:11):
Dooley had two daughters and a forty gallon. Still one
guy watched the boarder, the other watched the spy and
Mama cork the bottles. When all Dooley fetched down my lee,
slipping up to holler to Len, trying to make a
daughter to Leck and us.
Speaker 3 (49:29):
Water I pay back some day.
Speaker 2 (49:50):
The revenewers came for him, and slipping through the woods,
Dooley kept behind.
Speaker 3 (49:55):
Him, mauling, never lost his goood.
Speaker 2 (49:58):
Dooley was a trade. When into town he come sugar
buy the but shove my lasses by the tongue.
Speaker 22 (50:07):
To leave, living un hollered to leave, trying to make
a dollar to leave.
Speaker 2 (50:12):
Give us Swam my pay back some day.
Speaker 22 (50:34):
I remember very well today, Oh dude, he died, comembing
fulklic sorry and man surround and cry, Now do lis
On a mountain he lies her haul along and.
Speaker 2 (50:46):
Put a jump beside him, and a barrel for his.
Speaker 22 (50:49):
Tongue to live, slipping down and holler to live, trying
to make a dollar to lenk and ask for my
pay back some day.
Speaker 4 (51:05):
How do you like from now?
Speaker 3 (51:24):
A right nuck overnight?
Speaker 21 (51:29):
I never told you were friends with j d shall
not chieppole lawns on our side
Speaker 2 (51:35):
Billy now yeah, oh hey,
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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