Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Good morning, and you got the big show on al Rady.
More chances for you to win coming up after your news,
weather and sports.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Good morning, Thiscious Connery, Sean Connery. And you might think
that I'm just another sophisticated yet rugged Scottish movie star,
and you'd be right. What's my secret? The truth is
I can't stop my day without listening to the Big
Show with John Boy and Billy crush Me. They're a
lot funnier than Doctor Noan blofeld.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Gog a noodle noo up and now I'm welcome to
thursdayju Live the twenty fourth, got a big show on
the radio here in National Amelia Our Heart Day, Our Heart,
Our Heart, National Tequila Day, amused Mysia, National Cousins Day.
(01:29):
They're good for practice out here, National drive through Day.
Speaker 4 (01:36):
Okay, now, who invented the drive through?
Speaker 1 (01:40):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (01:41):
You know you've met him.
Speaker 3 (01:43):
You hung out with him day from Windy That's right,
all right, man?
Speaker 1 (01:48):
How about that?
Speaker 5 (01:49):
And then perfected it so that there would be one
window where you ordered, and you drive around the building
at the other window and.
Speaker 4 (01:57):
Pick up your order, so it didn't feel like you
were waiting as long. Even though you.
Speaker 1 (02:00):
Were ah oh, Dave going on there.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
He gave me a gold card for the Free Carolina
Classic when they introduced that a win Wednesdays.
Speaker 1 (02:13):
I can only get one today though.
Speaker 6 (02:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (02:15):
Well but it worked out for for like months. It
was great.
Speaker 3 (02:21):
All right, National drive through Day, thing about day there
and National Refreshment Day, so that goes alongest National.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
Intern Day, tater.
Speaker 7 (02:30):
All right.
Speaker 3 (02:31):
See, interns can turn out to be a useful member
in the company that they start out interning.
Speaker 8 (02:38):
That's the point, yes, her heart.
Speaker 1 (02:45):
All right, you didn't hear that part.
Speaker 4 (02:47):
Yeah, I know.
Speaker 8 (02:47):
I just joined in when you were being man's plaining
about the drive through.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
That is the thing. Ah right, well it works.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
We're awake, Big Shows on the radio. Good morning, Big
Shows on the radio. First prize pig is one hundred
and twenty dollars worth of Bull's Not Cleaning products made
in the USA. Click on that Bull'snot bounder when you
hit the Big Show dot com find out all about
some great products. It keeps America moving. Well, actually they
(03:25):
make the truck driverers look good. That keeps America moving.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Y'all know what you do? See tap.
Speaker 3 (03:35):
Three dates in History where we'll get our categories. July
twenty four, there was nineteen eighty eight the largest milkshake
weighed fifty four thousand, nine hundred and fourteen pounds and
thirteen ounces. It was in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada.
Speaker 8 (03:52):
Why I don't know, say they did.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
Now it's got all these numbers they used for ice.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
About ten thousand pounds ice cream. That's how you need
to know.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Five hundred and thirty seven pounds of topping with us
interesting syrup.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
Okay, all right?
Speaker 7 (04:14):
Oh one.
Speaker 3 (04:14):
A teenage suspect that was apparently under the influence of
something escape from authorities in Lewiston, Maine, after biting through
the steel chain on his handcuffs.
Speaker 1 (04:25):
Wow, he'd believe it. Man.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
He was recaptured lay sent a home for troubled teens
with strong teeth.
Speaker 8 (04:33):
You think.
Speaker 3 (04:35):
Finally, twenty twelve, television actor Sherman Hemsley passed away at
the age of seventy four. He was best known as
George Jefferson on the sitcom All in the Family and
the Jeffersons, which ran for eleven seasons after spun off
from Archie and Edith.
Speaker 8 (04:53):
How I like that?
Speaker 1 (04:58):
Well, there you go.
Speaker 3 (04:58):
There's the categories on eight hundred big shows you told
free line, Come on play for the bull snod next.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
Good morning, it's.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
A big show on the radio for you. Thursday, July
twenty fourth. Let's check out our future track for the
Big Show Big Box for this Thursdays, mister Rubarb, over
delivered and underpaid. Keywords underpaid in the Big Box at
the Big Show dot comy right now and w am uctors.
Speaker 9 (05:56):
Let's play uptors.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
It's the game that anyone can weird. John Boys and
Billy gave.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
The prizes from the big prize being Let's go ma
contest the number one.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
This should really be a lot of funs playing up.
Speaker 3 (06:16):
Have a lurry up and guest time you love the
best time you have.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
A big shot.
Speaker 3 (06:22):
Let's say he on my goal from Savannah, John Yob.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
We have shots, come on to my goal. Good morning you,
hey man. We all someome welcome in here amongst us.
All right, let's see we'll get.
Speaker 3 (06:46):
To the milkshak category. Tainter Milkshake's song My Milkshake brings.
Speaker 10 (06:51):
Other boys of the yard.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
They're like it's better than you.
Speaker 8 (06:54):
They're like, it's better than your did you.
Speaker 3 (06:57):
John, I've never heard that that version, and I hope
I'll never hear it again. We'll get back to hip hop,
Ali Michael. Let's get you going, buddy in five seconds.
Three things made with ice cream, Ready go.
Speaker 4 (07:22):
Milkshake, banana split and a Sunday bamp.
Speaker 1 (07:26):
Now give us three things that you can chew, Ready.
Speaker 11 (07:30):
Go, Gong foods and candy.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
And for the wind. The three TV sitcoms, Ready go,
The Jeffersons, All in the Family and Seinfail.
Speaker 3 (07:46):
And now you old minal winning one hundred twenty dollars
one of the most not We'll get into you now,
Savannah many hour on top of your news Fella time
capsule July twenty fourth on the outside.
Speaker 1 (08:06):
That's the one they got a neck.
Speaker 12 (08:39):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one export.
Speaker 13 (08:54):
Hey stupid, where's you made?
Speaker 1 (08:56):
Hey, Spanky, they're just pulling up in a limo.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
Now, I can't believe Cadbury's mom came here all the
way from England?
Speaker 1 (09:03):
England.
Speaker 13 (09:03):
Ain't we gotting the foreigners in this country already? Why
don't you just bring your whole damn family over. Friend
of mine's the dentist.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
He can use the working off mister personality here to come.
Speaker 13 (09:14):
Holy pete.
Speaker 9 (09:15):
They looked like a couple of bowling pins.
Speaker 13 (09:18):
They plan on setting down. I better pushing chairs together.
Speaker 9 (09:22):
Yeah we are mother, this is the Yellow Rose.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
Oh how great oohing billiards? And look at all the TVs?
How American? Hello, Oh, mother Cadbury.
Speaker 10 (09:36):
This is my good friend and employer moster boy Hey,
Mama Cadbury.
Speaker 1 (09:40):
You call me John Boyd and you may call me Victoria. Oh, Nigel.
He doesn't look like a dog at all. He's adorable.
Speaker 3 (09:49):
I can't help it. I'm just a dollar slip of
the tongue. I'd be mad if I knew what it meant. Yes,
and this is Spanky. He's the owner of this fine establishment.
Speaker 13 (10:01):
How's it going there, Margaret? That you got your green carts?
Speaker 3 (10:06):
Never mind him, Victoria, he just kidding. He's won him
quirky Southern stereo times you heard about you.
Speaker 1 (10:12):
Just make yourself at home.
Speaker 8 (10:13):
Will let me freshen up a bit. It's been a
long journey. I'll just be a visit to the lou
if you don't mind.
Speaker 1 (10:19):
I don't mind. What is it?
Speaker 9 (10:21):
The lows, the water closet, the restroom, sir, it's right
over there.
Speaker 1 (10:25):
Mother, Thank you, Nigel. Won't to be a moment. Hurry back,
miss you already you?
Speaker 13 (10:33):
Hey, you find a guy in there, it's just Yogi.
Wake him up and tell him to judge Judy's on.
Speaker 1 (10:39):
Dad.
Speaker 9 (10:39):
Are you sure this is the proper place for a reception?
Speaker 1 (10:42):
You want to give her a taste of America?
Speaker 7 (10:44):
Right?
Speaker 3 (10:45):
What better place in the Yellow Rose? Not to mention
all that Southern hospitality?
Speaker 13 (10:49):
Okay, Jack asked you and the penguin want to stop
hanging around the front door. You're scaring away the paying
customers love that Southern hospitality. Mourning you there, mister French.
We ain't got no kidney pie or sheep got casserole
in the back. She's gonna have to eat American food.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
Oh dah, I don't.
Speaker 9 (11:06):
Even mentioned food. My stomach is all a.
Speaker 13 (11:08):
Chun Hey, bigfoot, what's his problem? Usually he pounds down
the chicken livers like the big bad wolf.
Speaker 3 (11:13):
Oh, he's just nervous. He hasn't seen his mom in
a while. He wants everything to beat perfect.
Speaker 13 (11:18):
I got just a thing here, Tubby, take a pull
off of this and calm your nerves.
Speaker 10 (11:23):
Ah ice water, thank you, Spanky, and in a mason
jaw houroral.
Speaker 1 (11:30):
Son of a son, a son of.
Speaker 13 (11:32):
A is this bone shine? Good year?
Speaker 1 (11:37):
Two?
Speaker 13 (11:37):
Yesterday? Bye?
Speaker 1 (11:39):
Heavens, get that out of here.
Speaker 3 (11:41):
The last thing we need is Cadbury getting hammered and
starting to rumble in front of his mom.
Speaker 13 (11:45):
All right, all right, just give me a second. I
gotta wait till the old crow gets out of the crapper.
Speaker 9 (11:50):
Why do you have to wait?
Speaker 13 (11:51):
I hide the white lightning in the cabinet under the sinks.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
Oh yeah, what's you worried about, Cadbury?
Speaker 3 (12:02):
That spiky She found your stash, my moonshine.
Speaker 14 (12:07):
Noiser, there you are, there's your your hands and friend.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
She's hammered, mother, What have you done? Well?
Speaker 14 (12:18):
I was looking for some tissue and I found the
most delightful bottled waters my fickles Walters snoop son.
Speaker 9 (12:33):
Mother.
Speaker 1 (12:34):
Please, how about you there, old stuff cat Berry. I'm
not sure, but I think your mom's hitting on me.
Speaker 13 (12:42):
Yes, she must be tanked in Hey laffet stuff, your
magiestate at private stock.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
What so delicious? Holy moly, she's jugging it like a sailor.
Speaker 13 (12:54):
I said, give me.
Speaker 1 (12:55):
That big head who pulled back a.
Speaker 9 (12:59):
Stone, son of mister Spanky is did he. You'd be
wise to just let her finish it. At this point
she can be quite stubborn. Oh yeah, we'll so can
I Now listen.
Speaker 13 (13:10):
Here, Vicky, don't make me throw you out of here
on your butt.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
Uh what do you mean? Oh? Good for it, that's
what I mean.
Speaker 13 (13:25):
Don't say I didn't warn you. Sorry, Penguin, Your mom
is getting the bums. Rush Cadbury, do something. Spanky's making
a move for your mom.
Speaker 12 (13:34):
Get some tubby.
Speaker 2 (13:36):
Look away, sir, I beg you hey, not the face,
not the face, May Cadbury.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
She's wailing spacey good, I see where you get it.
Speaker 9 (13:49):
Yes, usually skips a generation too, So shall we.
Speaker 1 (13:52):
Break them up?
Speaker 9 (13:53):
Let them go for a while. So it feels good to.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
Be on this side of it for a cham.
Speaker 12 (14:01):
Yo, John Boy and Billy.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
Today's broadcast is being simulcast in broken English.
Speaker 12 (14:15):
Good Morning Radio done right.
Speaker 3 (14:44):
Good morning on the big shows on the radio Thursday
ju Live of twenty fourth, Good this, Good morning at
Big Shoe.
Speaker 7 (14:53):
Well, good morning, John Boy and Billy, and good morning
to all our beloved friends after in Radio Lione, that
says a Reverend Billy Ray Collins coming tell you from
the sword of Joshua Independent Full Gospel Pentecostal Assembly just
off State Road twenty three on the Frontage Road. Well,
summertimes here again. The kiddies is out of school and
(15:16):
most of them is home by the cellf all day.
That's right, miss modern mommy. We know you's awful busy
running around in your little pants suit trying to make
it in the business world. That don't hardly leave no
time for frivolous mess like looking after your young uns,
does it. Oh, that's all right, don't worry. They'll be fine.
(15:38):
They got their own electronic babysitter. The modern, secular, moral, relativistic,
borderline homosexual American media standing by to fill up that
empty space in their heads. Gone to your little working
woman job. Bobby and Susie be finding their home soaking
up eight hours of educational television programs like Old SpongeBob,
(16:03):
Queer Pants and Muffy the Vampire Slanger and celebrity drunkards
playing pokers. Maybe they'll get real lucky and right up
on one of them all Day Beavis and Butthole. Or
maybe they'll hook up one of them MD three players
up to their head and pump their brain full of
(16:23):
inspiring spiritual music from great moral teachers like Madonner and
Christine Alligator and the Blank Eyed Ts and Queen Levitra
and Hassey Osman and at Bunch. Or if MTV has
to raise your youngins for you, well, I reckon that's
a small price to pay. So you and your husband
(16:46):
there can afford to have two cars and three four
TV sets and a cabinet full of alky hall in
you ruffy room like everybody else in the subdivision. All
you say, hold on, their preacher, ain't what I want
it all? Ain't there nothing I can do to keep
the devil away from my young'uns this summer? Yes there is, friends,
(17:08):
Sign them up now for the two thousand and five
edition of the Sword of Joshua. Independent Photo Gospel, Pennecostal Assembly,
Late Haitian Bible School. Our guest teacher this year is
doctor gay Lord McGinley from the Mountain Nebo Independent Full
of Gospel, Pennecostal Day School and Bible Institute in Gobbler's Nove, Alabama.
(17:31):
Doctor McGinley bring a daily message firm in the no
nonsense style. It's sure to get their attention. In other words,
he ain't afraid to whoop the dog out of anybody
to start cutting up. That's my friends around here this week,
more than the Bible is liable to get thumped, if
you know what. Our five day curriculum includes a nurishing
(17:54):
lunch of Graham Crackers in pineapple juice, plus a genuine
Schofield reference by that's yours to keep all for a
love offering of just twenty nine ninety five, and all
proceeds go towards the church programs that try to keep
people from going to Hoyo ranfol call the Sword of
Joshua Vacation Bubble School hotline now at one eight hundred
(18:19):
nine three seven twenty six thirty six. That's one eight
hundred years amen. This is a Reverend Billy reck Hollins
from hounding into time to turn so you don't burn
John Boyn belly y'all keep them straight up.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
Good morning, you got the Big Show on already.
Speaker 3 (18:40):
All more chances to you to win coming up after
your news weather sports.
Speaker 9 (18:44):
Oh oh, I didn't know, I didn't see you all.
Speaker 10 (18:47):
This is Professor Mulvin handed Day, head of eh ah
oh ahead of Big Show Science and History Division.
Speaker 9 (18:55):
And you're listening to two boys who are destined to
be history. John Oh yeah, Billy on the Big Show, Yo.
Speaker 10 (19:04):
Yeah, when I say that will be history, I didn't
he propi a negative.
Speaker 9 (19:08):
I simply meant that they Oh what did I mean?
Speaker 1 (19:17):
H good morning, it's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 3 (19:52):
There's the morning hand that awaken, got the old cat
made handing himselfish tournament going on. Yes, I wanted back
in all the way?
Speaker 1 (20:04):
Is that celebrate a little bit?
Speaker 3 (20:05):
Going to Jackie's favorite letters here, it's just a governments,
by the way, Captain's meeting. If you would like to
fish in cat medi Hanneman this Saturday and this Sunday
out of Riceville Beach had the bridge tender Marina.
Speaker 1 (20:17):
To night round around supper time. Captain leased to be there.
Speaker 3 (20:22):
You getting all the rules and riggs and get you
ready to go fishing this weekend.
Speaker 1 (20:26):
All right, we got it, man. I'll just look at it.
Speaker 3 (20:29):
At the celebrity birthday list, Jennifer Lopez is fifty six.
I don't guess I'm a surprised because I really didn't
know how she was.
Speaker 8 (20:35):
Was that surprises that doesn't that's not surprising.
Speaker 3 (20:38):
She's kind of old getting old, She's I mean.
Speaker 8 (20:42):
She's yeah, she's up there with Jennifer Aniston and all
about it. Yeah, they all came out at the same time.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
So but this was surprised me.
Speaker 3 (20:50):
Kramer on Seinfeld, Michael Richards is seventy six years old,
so Seinfeld is about that daye were they about to say?
Speaker 8 (20:59):
Yeah, yeah, like by man, I think I think Kramer's older.
I mean Richards is older.
Speaker 5 (21:03):
But yeah, Seinfeld was just knocked down a peg from
being the world's richest comedian.
Speaker 4 (21:10):
He's now number two. Number one is.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (21:15):
I'm trying to think of his name, the little short comic.
His name's jumped Evin Hart. There you go, Kevin Hart's
number one.
Speaker 2 (21:22):
Man.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
Kevin Hart's making his money on commercial.
Speaker 8 (21:24):
That's what he's done more Yes, side hustled.
Speaker 4 (21:28):
Yeah, I like him. Jackie doesn't.
Speaker 1 (21:31):
He doesn't get it.
Speaker 8 (21:32):
I don't think it's funny.
Speaker 1 (21:38):
Josh Sniff.
Speaker 3 (21:40):
So happy birthday to Jennifer Lopez. Good morning Bike shows,
Houl Radio. All right, hang over that letter about off
shore fishing with the cat medi Hanleman Turnham going on
this week. Just second, let me tell about the prize
pack you can win if you win John Lord Jeopardy
in minutes. It's on a sort of a small batch
(22:02):
hand cook peanuts from birt County Peanuts, a Southern tradition
for over one hundred years. Enter code jb B at checkout,
I want to buy some. You get twenty five percent
off plus free shipping and shop online Birtea County Peanuts
dot Now to look for the link at the Big
Show dot com.
Speaker 6 (22:20):
All right, here we go, Dear Jackie, offshore fishing with
John Boy. It's five o'clock in the morning, and everyone
on the boat stowed away. Everything stowed away. Everyone's here,
The engines are running, all the fishing gears in the
cockpit ready to go. So you might ask, why are
we still at the docks. I'll give you two guesses,
(22:41):
and the first one doesn't count. That's right, John Boy
is late. About half an hour later, here he comes
walking down the dock, comes into the cockpit and mumble something.
Speaker 1 (22:52):
About Thiggie making me late.
Speaker 6 (23:00):
He immediately walks into the saloon and falls asleep on
the couch.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
I think that's the salon. Either way it is. The
boat is.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (23:15):
Some time just starts out as.
Speaker 4 (23:18):
It is salon.
Speaker 6 (23:20):
This is the first time i've ever seen anyone sleep
walking before in my life. Usually about nine o'clock someone
goes into the gallery and makes a sandwich. The second
the sandwich is made, John Boy wakes up and says,
are you.
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Gonna eat that?
Speaker 6 (23:33):
So he takes a sandwich. He eats it and says,
sure is good. I wish I had something to drink,
And of course everyone runs to fetch him a drink.
Now he's sitting in the fighting chair asking how many
fish he caught this morning?
Speaker 4 (23:46):
The fighting chair, what it says?
Speaker 6 (23:50):
The answer is, John Boy, you caught four. He says good.
Fifteen minutes later he's fast asleep again.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
Somebody go wake him up. He's taking up the fighters.
Speaker 15 (24:07):
Now.
Speaker 6 (24:07):
We all know he's a big guy, but you would
think you could fish around him sleeping in the fighting
chair as he is.
Speaker 9 (24:13):
And by the way, if you've ever fished.
Speaker 1 (24:14):
Around so.
Speaker 15 (24:18):
Wrong.
Speaker 6 (24:19):
He has one leg, one leg out to the left,
the other one's to the right, no long arms hanging everywhere,
and my god, the snoring. So of course there's no
fish to be caught with the hibernating grizzly bear. Now
the captain's scream bill fish on and John Boy jumps
up and heads to the flying bridge. John Boy yells,
I see him. He's big.
Speaker 4 (24:41):
About twenty minutes, and that is how he says.
Speaker 6 (24:46):
After about twenty minutes, the mate has the fish beside
the boat and lets it go. John Boy says on
that quote, stupid, you lost the biggest fish I've been
caught all day. Then says y'all got ain't fried chicken.
I'm hungry, in which the slave of the moment fetches
(25:06):
John wants some chicken in a trunk.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
I feel like I was there.
Speaker 6 (25:15):
Now this is for me. See John Boy, I'm supposed
to tell you you did not realize they're supposed to
release bill fish. So he makes his way back to
the cabin and says he's going to take a nap,
but wake him up when we reach the inlet. The
reason he wants to wake up is so he can
go outside when we pass the docks and listen to
people who see him go by and yelling the parade way, oh,
(25:46):
hold on now the back of the dock, washing the boat,
cleaning the catch. When someone says where's John Boy, someone
else replies, I think he went in to take a nap.
It's sure enough he's inting there sleep and got three
baby dogs fan and the.
Speaker 1 (26:05):
Rough blue em on his neck.
Speaker 4 (26:06):
Because he's tired and sore from catching.
Speaker 6 (26:16):
He tells them how the stupid lost the biggest fishing,
remarks about how amazing it is that we could not
catch anything without him on the boat. So that's an
off shore fishing trip with John Boy. And by the way,
the reason it was Thiggie's fault John Boy was late
is because Thigge was out of town and didn't even
know Johnny was at the beach.
Speaker 1 (26:38):
Fisherman returning, we need a fighting couch out here. Think
I was that bad?
Speaker 3 (26:50):
Well, let's play John boyd Jeopardy for the bird teat
County Peanuts Prize pack review. Yesterday's question, we said, no
wonder you're sleeping through your lar. Researchers say the sound
made by one of these is more likely to joke
you away than anything else.
Speaker 8 (27:06):
What is a baby crying?
Speaker 1 (27:08):
Baby crying? We'll do it to.
Speaker 3 (27:13):
That is John Boy Jeopardy. According to survey results, it
forced to cannibalism. Nearly seventy percent of Americans say this
is the body part that they would eat first.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
Oh, what is the butt? Bob? No?
Speaker 3 (27:29):
I mean, I don't know what do y'all got one
eight hundred big show that's mostly found in it.
Speaker 1 (27:37):
The Big Show would go together weather.
Speaker 3 (27:39):
Yeah, okay, John Boy Jeopardy is next.
Speaker 1 (28:07):
Thursday morning. That's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 3 (28:10):
Feature track from the Big Show mid Balk mister roubarb
over delivered and underpaid, says him.
Speaker 1 (28:20):
Underpaid key words at the bit bonds.
Speaker 3 (28:24):
It makes show not gone right now, let's play jams
live across America.
Speaker 1 (28:30):
It's gone boy, Jemity, why.
Speaker 5 (28:32):
And now your host, Look, before you go around whining
about your crappy job, keep this in mind.
Speaker 4 (28:39):
Don't complain all the time, don't argue crying out loud.
Speaker 15 (28:42):
It's it's jobs out there.
Speaker 13 (28:44):
It's a little bit more difficult than what you got
in here.
Speaker 1 (28:47):
Please yeah, please, uh you enjoy it? And Jack is beautiful?
All right? That Charles out of Little North Carolina.
Speaker 7 (29:03):
Yeah, shut up.
Speaker 1 (29:04):
John Awsome.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
Well, Charles, you are first up at John Boy Jeopardy
this morning, So let's.
Speaker 1 (29:13):
Jump in here.
Speaker 3 (29:15):
According to survey results and forced to cannibalism, nearly seventy
percent of Americans say this is the body part that
they would eat first. So you're thinking about it Charles
picturing you the menu.
Speaker 7 (29:31):
There I've talked about, I'll talk about it.
Speaker 1 (29:34):
I don't want to go there. I'm talking about. Well,
we need to think. I think i'd eat my own tongue.
Speaker 3 (29:42):
First, so you would eat your own tongue somebody else.
Speaker 1 (29:48):
I don't love everybody.
Speaker 4 (29:49):
I don't want to miss this chance. He full of himself.
Speaker 1 (29:56):
Well, well, I'm listening to John boy. It's got a
weird bringing is all right? Well, well let's slee.
Speaker 16 (30:04):
You show us Charles's toe.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
I need some of the toes before and they enjoyed it. Okay,
I don't believe. I don't that your mess. I'm your mess.
Speaker 3 (30:30):
We appreciate you listening and playing with us. Charles and
Hope Mill you have a great day, buddy. Well, thank you.
Speaker 1 (30:39):
Power right, mama.
Speaker 3 (30:41):
Let's go to Michael, who's out and Duncan, Oklahoma. Good morning, Michael,
Good morning, Hey buddy.
Speaker 1 (30:49):
So it's not Charles's.
Speaker 3 (30:50):
Toe, Michael, that's accountabileism'. Seventy percent of Americans say this
is the body part they would eat first.
Speaker 1 (30:59):
What you think, I say legs?
Speaker 3 (31:03):
You say leg Well, let's say yeah, out the thigh?
Speaker 8 (31:13):
Is it dark meat? Just like chicken.
Speaker 1 (31:15):
I wonder I really don't know.
Speaker 5 (31:21):
Yeah, I think humans are pretty much white man.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
A right, Yeah, we got to it.
Speaker 3 (31:30):
Then, Michael, and you win the birteen County Peanuts Prize pack.
Buddy will get him to you, beautiful Duncan Oklahoma.
Speaker 8 (31:37):
Wa did go?
Speaker 3 (31:46):
A'm right?
Speaker 1 (31:46):
Here's a player right now, it's your new right on
the other.
Speaker 7 (31:49):
Side, a car and.
Speaker 1 (31:51):
A hardened el birds.
Speaker 7 (31:53):
I gonna be fun.
Speaker 1 (31:54):
And then a grumby old man.
Speaker 15 (31:56):
What a minute?
Speaker 1 (32:00):
H good morning, that's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 3 (32:36):
Who's moving around the landline of temptation trailer?
Speaker 7 (32:43):
Hello, there's this heart all my life on the fire?
About it?
Speaker 4 (32:46):
Not right now?
Speaker 11 (32:47):
Man?
Speaker 1 (32:47):
John o'ver been the head?
Speaker 7 (32:48):
Wait here there are you? Bigna Hary no driving knuckles,
draggon butt scrunching, boot lighting, nick knacking, fatty whacking, heyhole
looking flavor?
Speaker 1 (32:57):
Oh not much was you over? Cassaday double wi ah,
same old stuff.
Speaker 7 (33:03):
House weather warmed up over the weekends, so Sunday evening
the old man Crockett come out for his first naked
porch set of the year, kind of like when the
groundhog comes out of his home. But you see a
good bit more than his shatter. I see w mcgah
and his brother got busted for selling bootleg Hanner Montana
(33:23):
DVDs at the Plea market again, and stick Ludlow ain't
real happy with worse than handing out money to all
the crooked banks. Uh huh. His trust got a new
sticker on it. That's a picture of Calvin peeing on
Barney Frank. The weird thing is Barney looks like he's enjoying.
Speaker 1 (33:43):
Oh well, how's business at the body shop?
Speaker 7 (33:45):
Yeah, Bose Haying's quick to claim on the insurance as
he used to be. I guess it can't afford to
get the rates jacked up nowadays. So there's a lot
of door dangs and screwed up fenders driving around town.
In other words, we're kindly sucking wind at the moment.
Speaker 1 (34:00):
Well, you hang in there, man.
Speaker 11 (34:01):
How's our boy Delver dumb as dirt and twice as
wormy bought him a book the other day called how
to Be a Millionaire from the bargain ben at Walmart.
Speaker 7 (34:12):
So you know it's reliable, says I think we need
to pull ourselves out this whole recession by going to
extre mile on customer service. A millionaire. Ain't nothing but
a man that knows how to read people. And I
believe I got the touch too. I can tell what
a feller does for a living just by the kind of.
Speaker 4 (34:29):
Car you drive.
Speaker 7 (34:31):
Like the other day, boy drove a white Corvette in
to get the door thing fixed, and Devor says, how
they doc house tricks at the animal clinic. Feller says, wow,
how'd you know I was a veterinarian. Dever says, well,
cause of your car, I figured you're in a white vet,
so you must be a white vet. It's particular with
(34:51):
himself on that. Yeah, I said, you know that personal
plate that says dog doc on the back might have
been a clue too. Dever says, hey, scoff, if you
want to hoss, I got the eye of the tiger
feathers in here this morning. I could tell he worked
for the sign company because he was driving a red kneon.
He how it works? I said, okay, genius, see the
(35:13):
feller just pulled up in the beat up Ford. What
you reckon he does for a living? Never says, Well,
I'd say he's a proctologist. I said, how you figure that?
Never says, because he's got a brown probe the tiger.
Huh at the end of the day, he smells more
like a horn. Hey listen, I gotta run here. Men,
(35:35):
corn dog, millionaires fixing to go to work. You gonna
see later on. Yeah, you tell him, I said, I
know what you mean. Yeah, keep him straighting fires.
Speaker 4 (36:11):
All morning.
Speaker 3 (36:12):
That's a big shot on the radio. He here we go.
It's time for the grumpy old man.
Speaker 10 (36:22):
Fibberty, fabilty food. I'm old and I hate super heroes.
In my day, we didn't have no Kate flapping tight,
wearing secret identity, hiding bat guy bitch slapping faster than
a speeding bullet, running tall building, leaping goodie two shoes.
Speaker 9 (36:41):
We had superheroes with powers.
Speaker 10 (36:43):
No one else has today, like staying married until you died,
or it killed your man, or Captain pays's damn bills
on time. Look up in the sky, it's a bird,
it's a plane. I hate these new glasses superheroes. We
(37:05):
love superheroes. Ah, what a load of monkey spit. In
my day, we didn't need no comic books to find
strange and unusual people who.
Speaker 9 (37:17):
Stood for something bigger than themselves.
Speaker 10 (37:20):
We lived or in a part of history that produced
the real inspirations for them funny paper phonies. A time
when humanodities outnumbered the normal people, and we did it
the old fashioned Southern way in breeding.
Speaker 1 (37:35):
That's right.
Speaker 10 (37:35):
We were cousin humping maniacs, spitting out a steady stream
of off beat offspring to fight for truth justice at
the Hillbilly Waite. Probably the most famous was the town librarian,
Little Scottie yah Bro, or as we called him, power Possum.
He was pure albino and whiter than pat say Jack.
(37:59):
He WoT dark glasses over his creepy pink eyeballs, and
instead of a belly button, he had a big fleshy
pouch where he kept his eye drops and beef jerk.
He wore loose fitting drawers to hide a big thick
tail that hung out over his butt crack. That night,
he'd come out and prowled the neighborhoods looking for peeping toms,
(38:21):
and when he found some pervert oogle and some defenseless
women folk, he'd pounce on it with all his possible powers.
He'd wrap his tail around their neck, scamper up a tree,
and after he lynched him with his human butt rope.
He didn't want any evidence, so he'd eat him. WHOOPTI
WHIPTI Wobbleydee. I'm a pink eyed cannibal stringing up the
(38:44):
local dirt bags with my trusty rupnus, gobbling up in
its and learning the Dewey decimal system.
Speaker 9 (38:50):
And we liked it. We loved it.
Speaker 10 (38:54):
But just because we didn't have no superhero didn't mean
we didn't have a super villain. And he weren't no
man be pamby Mama's boy like that Red Skull or
that head wax and hoy pelloi Lex Luthor. We had
a real badass. His name was Franklin Delano, Dark Annihilator.
(39:15):
He was the smartest guy in town, but he used
his knowledge for evil on a count. He had a
little teeny wiki and he was taking it out of
the world. He had a giant head like a hollyween punkin,
and if you'd sneak up and.
Speaker 9 (39:29):
Scare him, he did wobble around like one of them bobbled.
Speaker 10 (39:32):
He had dogs, but you had to be careful because
when you weren't looking, he'd swing that enormous nagging at
you like a rabbid tether ball. He had a cave
on the old folly knuckle humper's root seller. He'd help
himself to all that country ham and rudy beggars and
pickled turnips, and he'd let go with some of the
most foul eye burned ass grenades.
Speaker 13 (39:54):
Know the man.
Speaker 10 (39:56):
Sometimes he'd ride through town on his horse drawn dark annihilator,
ob cutting the cheese.
Speaker 9 (40:01):
And head, just going every witch away.
Speaker 10 (40:03):
He was the county tax collector, so you couldn't screw
with him, because he'd take your land.
Speaker 9 (40:08):
And puts you in a street to lip with the gypsies.
And he am waste salesman. So we did the next
best thing.
Speaker 10 (40:14):
We gave his great dane those extra strength laxatives and
took its wife to the hayloft for a little of
the old hibbitygibbety on the side that kept him busy
cleaning up poop and wondering why none of his kids
had giant heads.
Speaker 13 (40:25):
Like he did.
Speaker 10 (40:26):
Wingle dingle whippity, do look at me, I'm a stupid
pumpkin dodgeon poop puddles, and doing the table tangle with
old hamster Willie's wife, filling the town with illegitimate children
and bitch slapping the gypsies. That smells like victory with
a side order a dog crack, and we like it.
Speaker 15 (40:46):
We loved it.
Speaker 9 (40:48):
Phlibberty Flew. I hate superheroes.
Speaker 7 (40:53):
Woooo.
Speaker 1 (40:54):
Good morning to beg Jellas on the radio. Hang over
your local news weathersport this This was royal.
Speaker 17 (41:01):
That is the King Vedo, slayer of the Visials, destroyer
of the Mongol, and aggravator of the Ottoman Empire.
Speaker 10 (41:12):
All listening to my two royal jesterers, those gap toothed barbarians,
John Boy and Billyard.
Speaker 17 (41:19):
You big show, A rise, a Loyd of beef, a
rise Duke of Ellington, rise, water of ten, essence of marp,
look of vagnesia.
Speaker 3 (42:07):
Good morning, it's a big show on the radio. And
y'all moving around Tennessee. He got some chances to see
killing me. If you ain't camel, they're gonna be at
the gym theater. What was a killer yell as We
talked to him earlier this week.
Speaker 1 (42:24):
He was on Tuesday morning.
Speaker 10 (42:27):
He said why, oh why and why whow why and why?
Speaker 1 (42:32):
He did it better like that?
Speaker 8 (42:33):
It was something similar.
Speaker 1 (42:34):
Yeah, he's at the gym theater in Edawa. Tennessee. Let's
try outside Chattanoogle. Of course, you know where that is.
This Friday night.
Speaker 3 (42:41):
The next Wednesday, he appears once again at the Grand
Old Opry in Nashville.
Speaker 1 (42:47):
He counted him down. How many of the said, do
you remember the bunch man, proud old Killer?
Speaker 8 (42:55):
He's getting up there near Henry Show. He said, he's
done over fifty.
Speaker 3 (42:59):
And the next Saturday, August second to Crier Performing Arts
Center in Paris, Tennessee. More info killerbees dot com