January 16, 2024 • 42 mins
Tuesday (pt 1 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, John Boy decides to make it all about Astronerd baby! .. You’re welcome..
℗®© 2024 John Boy & Billy, Inc.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
What go now? Okay, good morning, there's Dan Higgins here.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Nothing makes my day like a chance to pop in
on John boyn Billy here on the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
But I don't come here just to see them. I'm
not a gay.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
I come here for eye Candy, Babs, Jackie and theater
because daddy's got a sweet dude.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
How was that too.
Speaker 3 (00:19):
Blue talking to do love an alum. Welcome to Tuesday,
(01:00):
January the sixteenth, the Big Show on the radio. Hope
y'all had a great m l K day. Sorry, okay, buddy, yeah,
all right, all right, just getting back in the in
the mode of the mood of the Big Show. Oh
(01:20):
dog gone and Tator. We still got her caged up
in her house. I thought it was a living room
last week. Turns out and see homemade studio and UH
engineering supply closet in her glacial estates. It's so good
to see you, baby, looking good.
Speaker 4 (01:37):
Thank you, Good to be seen.
Speaker 3 (01:38):
Yeah, Oh, you covered up that blood head hair this
morning with a big show hat. Looks good, thank you.
Like that little camel around the around the built that's
the one I thought I looked familiar.
Speaker 5 (01:53):
Yeah, from the last time we cleaned out your office.
Speaker 4 (01:55):
All right, well, I mean not your hat, but I
got hat.
Speaker 3 (01:59):
Yeah, well you keep that been a wonderful thing, Thank you.
Speaker 5 (02:06):
Did you know it was optional?
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Oh right?
Speaker 4 (02:11):
I hate for this one.
Speaker 3 (02:13):
Right, digit dog gone ready to give her money back. Uh,
Donnie Presley call Donny President in the warehouse, wake him up.
Speaker 5 (02:21):
We got the ref get money back from Donnie, he
owed me.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
Yeah good. Oh right, Jackie, you have a good day yesterday, baby.
Speaker 6 (02:34):
Of Jonathan the third, I'm happy to be back in
your presence.
Speaker 3 (02:38):
Hello Randy, Hello Potato. Oh I myself did not get
a John Boy and Billy hat, just saying supposed to
be my people's day yesterday. But I can't even get
a damn cat and buy some tires to run up
to the fal over the weekend.
Speaker 5 (02:59):
What kind of time?
Speaker 3 (03:00):
Just you know, knock? All right, let's see here, uh
National Days. Look at this National without a Scalpel Day. Now,
let's see what this means. Ah Gerald, National without a
Scalpel Day recognized his opportunities to treat disease without a scalpel. Okay,
you know, as you're having surgery, they come in handy,
(03:21):
So let's not get crazy. National fig Newton Day y'all
like a Fig Newton do. It's been a while too, alright.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
I don't like the apple and all the other nud
junk they put in.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
That's true.
Speaker 5 (03:35):
Yeah, man, have you ever had figs right off the bush?
Speaker 3 (03:37):
Oh? Man? We got a fig tree? You kidding me?
Travis Stars man got his grandma's recipe for fig preserves. Good, Yeah,
and made it like a strawberry strawberry fig so had
some kind of flavoring in there. Only grandma knows. Grandmall
Stars good work, all right, and let's see well listen
(04:00):
that why is it fig newt No, it's not Fig Day,
because yeah they are. I think they come in to
fall their past. Man, we're figuring. Yeah, so the Fig
Newton Do Religious Freedom Day. That would be nice if
we continue to have that, this National nothing Day, a
day not to celebrate anything. Well, dog on it should
have led with that one. We'll save us some time. Yeah,
(04:22):
all right, Well, happy day y'all, Tuesday, January sixteenth. We
got three days in history saved up. They will be
very important. We'll get our categories for outbirds and get
the first prize back out those we're waiting big shows
on the radio. Good morning, Got the Big Show on
the radio. First prize pack one hundred and twenty dollars
worth of bulls not cleaning products made in a USA.
(04:44):
Truck drivers keep America moving the bulls not make sure
they look good doing it. Live for bulls not at
truck stops across America or Brownox dot com. When you
go to the Big Show dot Com, click on that
Bull's not banter. Get all info you need. Li's en
up here to our three days in history where we'll
glean in our category and win you a bunch. Nineteen
seventy three, the first National Nothing Day was observed. Oh
(05:09):
is this the same thing? We were just talking about?
National Nothing Day Day? Not to celebrate anything? All right, Well,
there's their first legs up. You already got that weve
up to. Nineteen ninety six, Ye, Jamaican authorities fired upon
oh Jimmy Buffett sea plane. That's when't that happened on
this date in ninety six? They thought it was a
(05:32):
drug trafficker's plane and YouTube singer Bono was flying with
Buffett and neither was hurt. Wow Buffet, that's his song.
We promised not to shoot you out of this scu
When had come to Jamaica something like that.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
You'll like to hear more right now.
Speaker 5 (05:53):
I'm good, taytter anything, tell you a.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
Way, baby, I'm scurrey.
Speaker 4 (05:57):
That it was like a lullaby.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
Thank you a lot of soothing boys at times on
this state No. Seven and Tyler hassee Florida. Hunter's wife
said when she opened a refrigerator, the duck her husband
killed two days earlier, raised its head and looked at her.
Woman said she freaked out. Told her daughter to get
that duck to the hospital right now.
Speaker 5 (06:20):
Say it did sounds like a Willie P.
Speaker 3 (06:22):
Richson. That the last report the duck shot in the
wing and leg was doing well. That the Goose Creek
Wildlife Sanctuary, they do good work there.
Speaker 4 (06:34):
That was expensive.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
Oh man, no kid, the little duck tools I gotta
get in. Well, there you go. There's the three categories.
We can do that one eight hundred big shows. You
told free Line. Let's play out birds next, Good morning,
(07:13):
it's a big show on the radio. Roll until you Tuesday.
And today's feature track from the Big Show, Big Box
rev and Goom, The Ten Commandments and the Preacher's Bicycle.
This hurts from gey word bicycle and enjoy you hit
the big box at the Big Show dot Com. They're
riding down. Where's that.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
Upburst?
Speaker 7 (07:35):
Let's play Upburst. It's the game that anyone can win.
Speaker 3 (07:40):
John Board Billy, give the.
Speaker 7 (07:43):
Prizes from the big Prize p Let's go contest the
number one. This should really be a lot of funs
when you're playing Upburst.
Speaker 8 (07:55):
Have a hurry up and guest time you love the
best time you have a big shots.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
Let's say, hey, George from Hollow Rock ten, I see we.
Speaker 9 (08:10):
Shot.
Speaker 3 (08:15):
Good morning George, come in here hot out of Hollow Rock.
Speaker 10 (08:21):
Good morning.
Speaker 3 (08:23):
I am doing good man doing good? All right, we
ready to go. Just get George two. These three categories
gets you at bull snot prize back. You ready to go, buddy, Yes, sir,
I am five seconds. Give us three things that are
a waste of time? Ready go.
Speaker 10 (08:42):
Call on the d M.
Speaker 3 (08:43):
D answering telemarketers and answering unknown bone all rides get
around a waste of time on the phone. Yes, there's
a lot of that going around. He hit it. I'll
ask you to Nikki Hayley would stop texting me. I'm
gonna get like three or four texts from Nicky Haley
to day.
Speaker 11 (09:02):
Oh you have to do is when you get those
you don't want them hit or just type the word stop. Okay,
reply to it okay, and by law they have to take.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
You for list.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Okay. Good all gotten a text? Well, I'd like to
give her them. She's wanting to talk to me. Man,
she must have a lot of time on her hands.
All right, well, here we go, so George, let's move
on to category two. Give us three singers, ready go.
Speaker 10 (09:28):
Jimmy Buffett, James Taylor and a born Bam.
Speaker 3 (09:33):
That was a wide jondre of music. Will tell you there, George,
good working for the wind. Three things you put in
the fridge? Ready go, milk, bacon and butter. And there
you are doing when and bulls not prized back? You
ain't gonna jack. You'll hook you up.
Speaker 10 (09:53):
Thank you very much, first time caller.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
A body get out for George. Thank you, thank you,
thank you. All right, he's us back into the work
week when the comedic stylings of astro Nerd has been
working so hard. Open mic, We're it all started only
on the side. Good morning, it's a big show on
(10:51):
the radio. It's all about astro nerds chasing his comedy dream.
This Tuesday, Lesbian is going where it all started.
Speaker 8 (11:00):
Welcome back to Knucklehead's comedy club right here in dotin Alabama.
Speaker 7 (11:04):
I'm Chippy Chuckles.
Speaker 10 (11:05):
That was made.
Speaker 8 (11:06):
A man performing a medley of Weird Owl's greatest hit
on his watering can.
Speaker 1 (11:10):
Thanks a love made him man.
Speaker 6 (11:12):
Hey Wolf ofd Brimley called he wants his mustache back.
Speaker 7 (11:14):
I'm joking of gours.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Listen up next.
Speaker 8 (11:18):
A guy whose career has really taken off, mostly thanks
to that propeller on his head.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
A guy who's destined to be a big star because
he lives on one.
Speaker 8 (11:27):
Give it up for the unique comedy stylings of the
astro nerves.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
Thanks Chirpy. Sorry, I'm like, hey, what's with all those
traffic cones? They're everywhere. It's like trying to navigate through
the van hoove A law for asteroid belt when your
warp drive is out.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
Killed me.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
Speaking of driving, you can always bot my car in
the parking lot by the bumper stickers.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
Toffly. My other car is a Saturn black holes suck.
Speaker 3 (12:07):
Hunk.
Speaker 2 (12:07):
If you're from Alpha Centauri, I'm an astronomer, not an astrologer.
Speaker 7 (12:14):
Dang it.
Speaker 2 (12:15):
And of course my favorite. My wife asked me to
give up stargazing. I sure will miss her suck just kidding' han.
People are always coming up to me and saying, astro nerd,
do you believe in extraterrestrial intelligence?
Speaker 1 (12:31):
And I always say, heck, I'm still looking for some
around here.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
Around here because people are so stupid sometimes. But you know, folks,
I've actually seen an alien. In fact, he's painting my
house right now.
Speaker 1 (12:53):
It's wild.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
But seriously, the spaceship door opened up, and this alien
says to me. He says, I come in peace. And
I said to him, lucky you. I got here in
a pacer. A pacer.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
Should I be doing this acting?
Speaker 3 (13:13):
Cling on?
Speaker 2 (13:14):
So I was out in California, where said lend, one
of my friends invited me to a star party.
Speaker 1 (13:20):
Well, the joke was on me. I was there for
an hour and I finally.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
Went up to a guy and said, hey, Mel Gibson,
where are all the telescopes? Then he blamed it on
the jews and we did tequila shots till two am.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
Thank goodness, he was able to drive. I was hammered.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
It's hard being a Southern astronomer though, you know, here's
the top five ways you can tell you're a redneck astronomer.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
Number five, I've.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Got a Tasco Galaxy telescope with the starfinder options up
on blocked in the front yard. Number four you use
bacon fat to grease your declination bearing.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
Three, there's a cup holder on your tripod. Two you
call the dog star old old Deep.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
And the number one way to tell that you're a
redneck astronomer. You use pictures of the flame nebula to
get in the mead. When you want to get frisky,
you have pictures of them. Whoa, hey, racing fat boys.
Sit down every time you stand up in front of
the spotlight. I think I'm missing any clip missing an eclipse?
Speaker 7 (14:40):
Is this thing on? Okay?
Speaker 6 (14:44):
All right, okay, thanks astroner.
Speaker 7 (14:47):
Let's hear it for him out.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Hold on, take a chirpy. I got some risk management
stuff that Billy rais. Yeah, maybe next time, but I
was killing no, no, no, take a hike.
Speaker 6 (14:55):
Okay, take up space. Hey, I do what?
Speaker 7 (14:57):
Get your anus on out of here?
Speaker 1 (14:58):
Hey, that's good?
Speaker 7 (14:59):
Can I use your ain it?
Speaker 3 (15:28):
Good? Tuesday Morning, Big Show us on the radio Action.
Speaker 12 (15:33):
Welcome to John Boy and Billy Playhouse today's episode The
Blue Suit. As our story opens, the director from Brushywood
Funeral is comforting the widow of Larry Finkelstein.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
This is Finkelstein. We can't tell you how sorry we
are for your loss, but rest assured, my staff and
I are prepared to do whatever it takes to make
sure your husband's final wishes are matt. Unfortunately, I have
to leave right now. But my my uncle, Bill Silvers
a is a new man since well Brushy would use
(16:10):
cars burnt down, nothing suspicious there by the way, So
so Bill won't be into to help you.
Speaker 13 (16:18):
Wow, thank you.
Speaker 4 (16:22):
It's all keep about so suddenly. I mean, you know,
one minute we're having dinner at his company's awards banquet.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Next thing you know, we're well, well we're here.
Speaker 3 (16:32):
Yes, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 6 (16:37):
I know what.
Speaker 3 (16:39):
I'm the new guy, Bill Silvers. No one ever expects
choke on a chicken bone. But your husband does look
very handsome in this tuxedo. So at least you'll save
some money by not having to buy him a new suit.
Speaker 9 (16:51):
Well, mister Silvers, is it? How dare you make this
about money? For your information? My Larry was wearing a
blue suit the first time I saw him, and I
want him to be buried in a blue suit, no
matter what.
Speaker 3 (17:04):
The extra of course, of course, Missus Finklesteen, Well we'll
take care of it. You need not worry. Please go home,
get some rests. We'll have everything ready before the service
on Sunday.
Speaker 5 (17:14):
A few days later, the last mourner files out of
Larry Finkelstein's funeral.
Speaker 14 (17:21):
Mister Silver's. Oh, mister Silvers, yes, missus, I just wanted
to tell you how happy I was with everything, and
the blue suit that your staff picked for my Larry
was absolutely perfect. Now I realize a suit like that
doesn't come inexpensively, So how much.
Speaker 7 (17:39):
Do I owe you?
Speaker 3 (17:41):
Not a thing? Is luck? What happened we had another
client's body, or rather the same not as your husband's.
That man was wearing a new blue suit since his
wife didn't care what he was wearing when he was buried.
Well weave, Oh.
Speaker 9 (17:53):
My god, you switched Larry's suit with another dead there.
Speaker 3 (17:57):
Oh no, no, don't be ridiculous, madam. Well, that would
not only be a moral but possible even down right illegal. Beside,
your husband sooth was more than two sizeses larger than his.
Speaker 4 (18:08):
Oh, Okay, Thank goodness, so we switched.
Speaker 3 (18:11):
Their heads us.
Speaker 5 (18:19):
We hope you've enjoyed John Boy and Billy playhouse.
Speaker 3 (18:22):
By the way, will So manager retrieved the chicken bowl?
Would you like it for your scrub?
Speaker 11 (18:26):
You tune in again next time when we'll hear the
creepy old grave digger at Rushywood Cemetery say.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
Hey, big man, let me hold a dollar.
Speaker 2 (18:38):
This is sour beef Chokes, the world's most political wrestler
with my personal valet at made squeeze Sweaty buddy.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
Don't squeeze me too tight, I might you are adorable.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
And before every fight in our hot of the ring,
we warm up with two of the greatest patriots on
the airwaves, the World Heavyweight tag team Comedy Champions.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
Party about that.
Speaker 3 (18:58):
Half part that John Boy Billy Big shall.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
Be whatever you'll say, Sweatie, let me give you a hug.
Speaker 7 (19:05):
I warned you.
Speaker 3 (19:44):
Good morning. It's big show on the radio coming up
in minutes. Astro Nerd tries again. Man, do y'all have
a favorite Astro Nerd song?
Speaker 5 (19:54):
Nope, I actually do.
Speaker 4 (20:00):
Is a loser baby.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
That kind of one bag when he had his head
in the clouds or chasing that comedy. You don't like this,
Maybe it's really the vanilla ice that I really like.
You can just take picturing the astro nerd here.
Speaker 6 (20:17):
What's enjoy It's next one his bike gwn named Kelly
willis the original version.
Speaker 7 (20:23):
Anyway, we put some junior nations stink on it and
came out like this.
Speaker 6 (20:29):
You can test the water, Boddy, it ain't no sin.
The doors open, honey, Come on in to the Trainer
of Love.
Speaker 7 (20:41):
Take a journey.
Speaker 6 (20:42):
Let me be your guide. Will double have been a
single wide? That's the Trainer of Love? Now the Trailer
of Love don't look like much, Buddy, could look a
lot better.
Speaker 1 (20:57):
Will the wallan's touched?
Speaker 6 (20:58):
You can wait for a fatter that's a cut of thub.
Or you can take your own chenses. That's the trailer.
Come on over and enjoy yourself, kick back and have
a beer.
Speaker 3 (21:15):
Twelve. That's the Trailer of Love.
Speaker 6 (21:22):
It's a party and it never stops unless a neighbor
woman calls the.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
Cops to the trailer love.
Speaker 8 (21:36):
Kill man.
Speaker 3 (21:42):
Play this day like you stole it?
Speaker 6 (21:45):
You what you did? Sir? Sorry?
Speaker 2 (21:49):
Better no.
Speaker 6 (21:55):
Show up like to be a newborn friend. You never
know what coming around things. That's the trader love saddle
up because of time to ride, seeing double in a
single wide, that's the trader love Well, trailer love, don't
(22:20):
look like much body, it'll feel a life better with
a wall that's touch. You can spend your life wishing
number starts above, but you can take your chances.
Speaker 13 (22:29):
That's the trader love, Trailer loves, trailer love, trailer.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
Trader.
Speaker 13 (22:44):
That's trailer love, trailer love, trailer love, and hidser brush.
Speaker 3 (23:05):
Good morning, Big Shows on the radio. Coming up. We
played John Boy Jeopardy after we hear astro Nerd trying
to get somebody's gonna win a Southern Ees varrioting pack.
You heard all the great benefits of him. Now's the
best time to try Southernees. It's not just a product,
is a way of life. Go to the Big Show
dot com click on the Southern East banner. Get twenty
five percent off using code JBB. Do that to check
(23:28):
out why supplies last must be twenty one to win.
Ain't a play for it in minutes. First, here we.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
Go, do the introduction. What do the introduction?
Speaker 3 (23:40):
Really?
Speaker 1 (23:40):
He'll be worth it. I got some doupe material in.
Speaker 3 (23:43):
Day okay, And here he is, folks, This time he's
not just taking up space. His new material is out
of this world. He's destined to be a star. The
guy who believes that Mars needs comedy boldly going where
no comedian has gone before. Am I supposed to read
(24:05):
all of this?
Speaker 1 (24:06):
Now? I think they got it? Skip to the inn.
Speaker 3 (24:10):
Here's laugh Troue nerd.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
Whack of whack of whacka. Wait a minute, I was
on a roll.
Speaker 3 (24:17):
Why a whack a whacker is not a roll?
Speaker 1 (24:19):
What's what's the problem?
Speaker 3 (24:20):
Well, your introduction is full of outer space reference. Laugh,
true nerd doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
Good call JB. Try it again. Okay, and from the top.
I'm not gonna take her from the top.
Speaker 3 (24:32):
It's only a four hour show't your Okay? Here's Astra nerds.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
Whack a whack of whacka. You already did that right.
Speaker 14 (24:42):
Here?
Speaker 1 (24:42):
Oh man, women be shopping, Women be shopping. That's right,
that's right.
Speaker 2 (24:49):
When my wife goes shopping and says bye bye, she
really means bye bye.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
Forget about the price of gas.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
The most expensive vehicle to operate per mile is the
shopping cart.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
This guy knows what I'm talking about.
Speaker 2 (25:07):
Every time my wife goes shopping she comes home with
everything but money.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
What's up with that? About time?
Speaker 2 (25:16):
In fact, the other day she went to the corner
market and came home with two corners.
Speaker 6 (25:24):
That is whack.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
My wife had a typical shopping day.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
She came home with an empty wallet, two parking tickets,
and three pages of trading stamps.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
Trading stamps. He was an old joke.
Speaker 3 (25:38):
It was such a terrible economy. Do you really think
shopping humor is a way to go good?
Speaker 1 (25:43):
Call? JB? Is this part of the show, Well, you
pulled the plug on my best material I'm looking for.
I'm looking for my plan B. Maybe she'd try McDonald's.
That's good.
Speaker 2 (25:55):
Can I get that?
Speaker 1 (25:58):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (25:58):
I mean got these saying it might have our audience.
Speaker 2 (26:01):
Hey man, my material is universal universally bad.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
That's a good one too, man, I think we're doing here.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
Wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait here's
some good ones.
Speaker 1 (26:15):
Signs you might be drinking too much. See this is
perfect for the rubes.
Speaker 9 (26:19):
That what?
Speaker 1 (26:21):
I'm sorry your show? That's better? I go ahead, whack
a whack a whack, skipped it a bit, dang it.
Speaker 2 (26:30):
You know you're drinking too much when the doctor find
traces of blood in your alcohol stream.
Speaker 7 (26:37):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
You know you're drinking too much when you wake up
in bed, still dress but you're underwears on the lamp.
Speaker 1 (26:45):
Who hasn't that happened too?
Speaker 2 (26:48):
You know you're drinking too much when the only job
you're qualified for is senator from Massachusetts.
Speaker 3 (26:54):
A Teddy Kennedy joke. Too soon, it's a little dating.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
And another haven't you learned by now that the more
you interrupt me?
Speaker 2 (27:07):
I start you talking in loud and fast monotone because
I'm afraid that no one will lift it to me
because I'm.
Speaker 1 (27:12):
So boring and irrelevant.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
And then to draw attention to myself, I start to
throw around confusing phrases and strange words like dark matter
of tongue, no equinox and quark astro.
Speaker 3 (27:22):
Nerds quark quarks the astro nerd.
Speaker 7 (27:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
To be honest, your material is just too I don't.
Speaker 1 (27:31):
Know, boring.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
You think my material is boring? You should see my
sex life. I'm kind of in a dry spill lately.
I only make whoope. In month's ending in Arch, my
wife told me I wanted to moan, but I didn't
have time.
Speaker 3 (27:50):
Now, I don't tell anybody really wants to hear about
your sex life, quark. Sorry, but it's back to square one.
Whack saga night Astronaut not astronud. That's good too, Can
I use that one? Right? Yes, let's go back to
(28:14):
the astronaut music here in a few minutes. A y'all,
let's play John BOYD Jeopardy. Let's jump right in here.
Nearly twice as many professional cycling competitors suffer injuries involving
this body part than a professional football player, the butt.
(28:36):
You know, you need one of those big old padded
bicycle season like I have. Have you seen my is
like a fur? Is like really a small animal that
I'm saying.
Speaker 5 (28:44):
Right, obviously you have no padding naturally in that area.
Speaker 3 (28:48):
Let's go yes, all right, Well, well, what's y'all got?
Speaker 6 (28:51):
One?
Speaker 3 (28:51):
Eight hundred big show? You told free line across America.
We played John Boyd Jeopardy. Next, Good morning, it's a
(29:21):
big show on the radio. We're going Tuesday, January sixteenth.
Today's feature track from the Big Show bid Box Reven Goog,
The Ten Commandments, and the Preacher's Bicycle. The classic We're
waiting for you in the big boxes. Sere's a keyword
bicycle when you hit the Big Show dot Com as
of my Wonderful Thing giveaway number ninety one at Bryce
(29:42):
Young Heisman Trophy Commemorate in football, where I started keeping
the stats. His first games was a Carolina Panther until
I gave up. You can see it all right there.
We're gonna have this up there for y'all until the
Friday before the Super Bowl, so we can be a
part or play all backs. Come and see what you
(30:04):
wrote on it with. Do you do with a sharpie
or sharpie? Oh yeah, sharpy of course I do have two.
Game six is so one of them is actually Game seven,
but I was kind of losing enterants around area. So
same for yourself when you go to the Big Show
dot Com.
Speaker 11 (30:21):
And right now let's play Yes Live across America. It's
John Boreman and your Dead Bundy and now a man
who says the hardest part of learning of riding a
bicycle is the pavement.
Speaker 3 (30:40):
John Boy, Thank you, said Steven out of Toccoa, Georgia.
Good morning, Stephen, Hey, going good man, going good. Welcome
in here. You know you got the first shot at
John Boy Jeopardy. Must be feeling pretty good about yourself
(31:02):
and this body part, well pretty good.
Speaker 10 (31:07):
Yeah, that's the first time I called I was.
Speaker 3 (31:11):
Man, Well, let's move you down, no boy, welcome Steven. Well,
let's I review this question here. Nearly twice as many
professional cycling competitors suffer injuries involving this body part than
professional football players. So what are you thinking down now
to course, Steven?
Speaker 10 (31:31):
Ah, Well, I was thinking I watch Monday Night football
and they pass a law they hitting their heads all
the time, so they ain't letting them hit the head.
So I'm must say, a head injury in the brain.
Speaker 3 (31:42):
Okay, you see all those targeting where they'll call it
and then make you go to the locker room. Yeah,
protecting that brain. Well, let's see. Is it the brain?
Speaker 7 (31:54):
You've got it?
Speaker 13 (31:54):
Buddy?
Speaker 3 (31:58):
Wow, man, that's something I guess. You know you're right
in the pavement. This is very hard advice, man, But
they got them little helmets. Maybe they need some better gear.
Speaker 11 (32:07):
Yeah, well, you can still have a brain injury with
a helmet on, and if the impact is hard.
Speaker 5 (32:13):
I mean, look at.
Speaker 11 (32:15):
The brace car driver Ernie Irvin, Sorry, Ernie Irvin, he
had a massive brain injury and he was certainly wearing
a helmet.
Speaker 15 (32:21):
Right.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Well, the sports with the highest number of brain injury
cycling is number one. If football is number two, then
it's baseball, basketball, and water sports.
Speaker 4 (32:32):
Cut understand basketball.
Speaker 10 (32:35):
Job boy, I'd say anything you going two hundred miles
an hour in you're gonna get a brain injury when
you come to a sudden stop.
Speaker 3 (32:42):
I can see that. And you know in that like
earn Hart when tragically it was killed there, heytnam in
since they put the Hans device, is really is helping
a lot, you know, Yeah, it's still very dangerous. And
tayl your question on basketball the slippery hardwood floor, they
bang their heads when they fall. No, I kept hitting
my head on the rim.
Speaker 16 (33:05):
And as far as swimming, good espectly from diving. Okay,
water sports in there for you. All right, Well we
learned some stuff, y'all. Try to be careful out there.
And Stephen, you've got the big old Southern East riding back,
head down to you and the koha.
Speaker 3 (33:23):
Oh right, alright, buddy, hang out. Why about the hours
top of your news? All right? Dune the Astro Nerd
Tuesday Tune with Nerds Heading the Cloud good morning, big
(34:18):
shows on the radio. Wow, just turn into a nicer
nerd celebration. Here heartner Junior nation ben uh you tune.
Just ride with a cover letter. We'll hoitd down in
about twenty minutes. Right now by, when the NERD's head
was still in the clouds, I went to.
Speaker 1 (34:41):
The Star Party to stare into the sky.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
I brought it doesn't telescopes because I'm a nerdy guy.
Speaker 1 (34:53):
I'm the star of the Star Party. I'm kind of
a big deal.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
They all say, I'm living proof that aliens are really.
Speaker 7 (35:06):
But it's dark out now, let's turn this mother out.
Speaker 15 (35:13):
If you like boring hobbies, then Astrata MEAs far out.
Speaker 7 (35:20):
Turnout there was pretty huge.
Speaker 2 (35:23):
We had nearly ten that's twice as many as last year,
but it was mostly men.
Speaker 1 (35:33):
We saw a meteor shower. It was pretty rad, truth
be told.
Speaker 7 (35:41):
It's the only shower most it ever had. But it's
dark out. Now, let's turn this mother out.
Speaker 15 (35:53):
If you like boring hobbies, then Astronao meats far out.
Speaker 7 (36:07):
Looked at all the same old stars. There was nothing new.
Speaker 2 (36:13):
We pulled our cash and sent someone to buy us
all a broom.
Speaker 1 (36:20):
They came back with a tall boy.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
We passed that beer around, turned up that song from
Star Wars.
Speaker 1 (36:30):
And everyone got down.
Speaker 7 (36:33):
But it's dark out now, let's turn this mother out.
Speaker 15 (36:39):
If you like boring hobbies, then astronomy is far out.
Speaker 2 (36:54):
Everyone got tipsy and stripped down to our socks.
Speaker 7 (37:00):
The cops showed up and tased us all.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
It was quite a shock.
Speaker 2 (37:07):
They took us all downtown and held us without bail.
You'd be surprised how many months that you see in jail.
Speaker 7 (37:20):
It's dark catock. Now, let's turn this mother out.
Speaker 15 (37:26):
If you like borring hobbies, then astronomyas far out.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
Good morning, it's a big shaw on the radio, Tuesday,
January sixteenth. There we go, all right. I got to
see Duday. We got it done. The players this cover
letter from heart Hey perverts.
Speaker 6 (38:15):
Yeah we go.
Speaker 3 (38:16):
Well. I scrubbed off another gooding over the weekend, and
when I got through with that, I recorded a new song.
But I'm uh huh. I'd give you the wares and
wy fors about my inspirations and whatnot, but this in
here pretty much speaks for itself, all right. Keep them
straight up to our hoyt. Let's listen.
Speaker 8 (38:46):
Well, I wake up in the morning, stumbling out of bed,
Fire up the coffee pot, try to clear my head.
Speaker 7 (39:01):
Tune in the.
Speaker 8 (39:02):
Bit show to get the latest word, just in time
to hear him picking on a boy named Astro Nerds.
Old Nerds, plump eat up about.
Speaker 7 (39:19):
A strong me.
Speaker 8 (39:22):
But the stuff he talks about don't make the lock
of sense to me. He's got a big brook telor
on the top of his head, and when he starts
talking space you'll wish that you were dead. Don't talk
(39:43):
too long on astro Nerd. Astro Nerds, you've got to
weirdes ruff. I think I ever heard people say he's
used Listen, then people have the point because astro Nerd
(40:05):
is the weirdest sucker to ever hit the joint. Old
Hermi sadd Nerd don't like him a bit. When Nerd
starts talking hermy tries to make quick.
Speaker 3 (40:31):
It's a big destruction.
Speaker 8 (40:33):
When it's time for the races, makes Hermi hit up
Ray for for a morning shot a boot. Leave me alone,
Astro Nerd, astro Nerd, you talk the weirdest crap.
Speaker 7 (40:54):
I think I ever heard.
Speaker 3 (40:58):
People say he's.
Speaker 8 (40:59):
A nut job, and they might just have a point
because astro Nerd is the weirdest sucker to ever hit
the joint. One deal, Astro Nerd will up and despar
(41:20):
and I recognize just the thing that all Hermie Walshton here.
They'll never be another Nerd to take his place when
that flying sauce takes him back to latter space. Leave
(41:41):
me alone, Astro Nerd. Astro Nerds, you talk the weirdest
craft I think I've ever heard. People say. He must
have got dropped on his head and burst. Cauls Astrow
(42:03):
Nerd is the weirdest suckered ever walked.
Speaker 1 (42:07):
Ear Hey, did I miss something
What go now? Okay, good morning, there's Dan Higgins here.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Nothing makes my day like a chance to pop in
on John boyn Billy here on the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (00:08):
But I don't come here just to see them. I'm
not a gay.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
I come here for eye Candy, Babs, Jackie and theater
because daddy's got a sweet dude.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
How was that too.
Speaker 3 (00:19):
Blue talking to do love an alum. Welcome to Tuesday,
(01:00):
January the sixteenth, the Big Show on the radio. Hope
y'all had a great m l K day. Sorry, okay, buddy, yeah,
all right, all right, just getting back in the in
the mode of the mood of the Big Show. Oh
(01:20):
dog gone and Tator. We still got her caged up
in her house. I thought it was a living room
last week. Turns out and see homemade studio and UH
engineering supply closet in her glacial estates. It's so good
to see you, baby, looking good.
Speaker 4 (01:37):
Thank you, Good to be seen.
Speaker 3 (01:38):
Yeah, Oh, you covered up that blood head hair this
morning with a big show hat. Looks good, thank you.
Like that little camel around the around the built that's
the one I thought I looked familiar.
Speaker 5 (01:53):
Yeah, from the last time we cleaned out your office.
Speaker 4 (01:55):
All right, well, I mean not your hat, but I
got hat.
Speaker 3 (01:59):
Yeah, well you keep that been a wonderful thing, Thank you.
Speaker 5 (02:06):
Did you know it was optional?
Speaker 3 (02:10):
Oh right?
Speaker 4 (02:11):
I hate for this one.
Speaker 3 (02:13):
Right, digit dog gone ready to give her money back. Uh,
Donnie Presley call Donny President in the warehouse, wake him up.
Speaker 5 (02:21):
We got the ref get money back from Donnie, he
owed me.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
Yeah good. Oh right, Jackie, you have a good day yesterday, baby.
Speaker 6 (02:34):
Of Jonathan the third, I'm happy to be back in
your presence.
Speaker 3 (02:38):
Hello Randy, Hello Potato. Oh I myself did not get
a John Boy and Billy hat, just saying supposed to
be my people's day yesterday. But I can't even get
a damn cat and buy some tires to run up
to the fal over the weekend.
Speaker 5 (02:59):
What kind of time?
Speaker 3 (03:00):
Just you know, knock? All right, let's see here, uh
National Days. Look at this National without a Scalpel Day. Now,
let's see what this means. Ah Gerald, National without a
Scalpel Day recognized his opportunities to treat disease without a scalpel. Okay,
you know, as you're having surgery, they come in handy,
(03:21):
So let's not get crazy. National fig Newton Day y'all
like a Fig Newton do. It's been a while too, alright.
Speaker 4 (03:31):
I don't like the apple and all the other nud
junk they put in.
Speaker 3 (03:34):
That's true.
Speaker 5 (03:35):
Yeah, man, have you ever had figs right off the bush?
Speaker 3 (03:37):
Oh? Man? We got a fig tree? You kidding me?
Travis Stars man got his grandma's recipe for fig preserves. Good, Yeah,
and made it like a strawberry strawberry fig so had
some kind of flavoring in there. Only grandma knows. Grandmall
Stars good work, all right, and let's see well listen
(04:00):
that why is it fig newt No, it's not Fig Day,
because yeah they are. I think they come in to
fall their past. Man, we're figuring. Yeah, so the Fig
Newton Do Religious Freedom Day. That would be nice if
we continue to have that, this National nothing Day, a
day not to celebrate anything. Well, dog on it should
have led with that one. We'll save us some time. Yeah,
(04:22):
all right, Well, happy day y'all, Tuesday, January sixteenth. We
got three days in history saved up. They will be
very important. We'll get our categories for outbirds and get
the first prize back out those we're waiting big shows
on the radio. Good morning, Got the Big Show on
the radio. First prize pack one hundred and twenty dollars
worth of bulls not cleaning products made in a USA.
(04:44):
Truck drivers keep America moving the bulls not make sure
they look good doing it. Live for bulls not at
truck stops across America or Brownox dot com. When you
go to the Big Show dot Com, click on that
Bull's not banter. Get all info you need. Li's en
up here to our three days in history where we'll
glean in our category and win you a bunch. Nineteen
seventy three, the first National Nothing Day was observed. Oh
(05:09):
is this the same thing? We were just talking about?
National Nothing Day Day? Not to celebrate anything? All right, Well,
there's their first legs up. You already got that weve
up to. Nineteen ninety six, Ye, Jamaican authorities fired upon
oh Jimmy Buffett sea plane. That's when't that happened on
this date in ninety six? They thought it was a
(05:32):
drug trafficker's plane and YouTube singer Bono was flying with
Buffett and neither was hurt. Wow Buffet, that's his song.
We promised not to shoot you out of this scu
When had come to Jamaica something like that.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
You'll like to hear more right now.
Speaker 5 (05:53):
I'm good, taytter anything, tell you a.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
Way, baby, I'm scurrey.
Speaker 4 (05:57):
That it was like a lullaby.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
Thank you a lot of soothing boys at times on
this state No. Seven and Tyler hassee Florida. Hunter's wife
said when she opened a refrigerator, the duck her husband
killed two days earlier, raised its head and looked at her.
Woman said she freaked out. Told her daughter to get
that duck to the hospital right now.
Speaker 5 (06:20):
Say it did sounds like a Willie P.
Speaker 3 (06:22):
Richson. That the last report the duck shot in the
wing and leg was doing well. That the Goose Creek
Wildlife Sanctuary, they do good work there.
Speaker 4 (06:34):
That was expensive.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
Oh man, no kid, the little duck tools I gotta
get in. Well, there you go. There's the three categories.
We can do that one eight hundred big shows. You
told free Line. Let's play out birds next, Good morning,
(07:13):
it's a big show on the radio. Roll until you Tuesday.
And today's feature track from the Big Show, Big Box
rev and Goom, The Ten Commandments and the Preacher's Bicycle.
This hurts from gey word bicycle and enjoy you hit
the big box at the Big Show dot Com. They're
riding down. Where's that.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
Upburst?
Speaker 7 (07:35):
Let's play Upburst. It's the game that anyone can win.
Speaker 3 (07:40):
John Board Billy, give the.
Speaker 7 (07:43):
Prizes from the big Prize p Let's go contest the
number one. This should really be a lot of funs
when you're playing Upburst.
Speaker 8 (07:55):
Have a hurry up and guest time you love the
best time you have a big shots.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
Let's say, hey, George from Hollow Rock ten, I see we.
Speaker 9 (08:10):
Shot.
Speaker 3 (08:15):
Good morning George, come in here hot out of Hollow Rock.
Speaker 10 (08:21):
Good morning.
Speaker 3 (08:23):
I am doing good man doing good? All right, we
ready to go. Just get George two. These three categories
gets you at bull snot prize back. You ready to go, buddy, Yes, sir,
I am five seconds. Give us three things that are
a waste of time? Ready go.
Speaker 10 (08:42):
Call on the d M.
Speaker 3 (08:43):
D answering telemarketers and answering unknown bone all rides get
around a waste of time on the phone. Yes, there's
a lot of that going around. He hit it. I'll
ask you to Nikki Hayley would stop texting me. I'm
gonna get like three or four texts from Nicky Haley
to day.
Speaker 11 (09:02):
Oh you have to do is when you get those
you don't want them hit or just type the word stop. Okay,
reply to it okay, and by law they have to take.
Speaker 1 (09:09):
You for list.
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Okay. Good all gotten a text? Well, I'd like to
give her them. She's wanting to talk to me. Man,
she must have a lot of time on her hands.
All right, well, here we go, so George, let's move
on to category two. Give us three singers, ready go.
Speaker 10 (09:28):
Jimmy Buffett, James Taylor and a born Bam.
Speaker 3 (09:33):
That was a wide jondre of music. Will tell you there, George,
good working for the wind. Three things you put in
the fridge? Ready go, milk, bacon and butter. And there
you are doing when and bulls not prized back? You
ain't gonna jack. You'll hook you up.
Speaker 10 (09:53):
Thank you very much, first time caller.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
A body get out for George. Thank you, thank you,
thank you. All right, he's us back into the work
week when the comedic stylings of astro Nerd has been
working so hard. Open mic, We're it all started only
on the side. Good morning, it's a big show on
(10:51):
the radio. It's all about astro nerds chasing his comedy dream.
This Tuesday, Lesbian is going where it all started.
Speaker 8 (11:00):
Welcome back to Knucklehead's comedy club right here in dotin Alabama.
Speaker 7 (11:04):
I'm Chippy Chuckles.
Speaker 10 (11:05):
That was made.
Speaker 8 (11:06):
A man performing a medley of Weird Owl's greatest hit
on his watering can.
Speaker 1 (11:10):
Thanks a love made him man.
Speaker 6 (11:12):
Hey Wolf ofd Brimley called he wants his mustache back.
Speaker 7 (11:14):
I'm joking of gours.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
Listen up next.
Speaker 8 (11:18):
A guy whose career has really taken off, mostly thanks
to that propeller on his head.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
A guy who's destined to be a big star because
he lives on one.
Speaker 8 (11:27):
Give it up for the unique comedy stylings of the
astro nerves.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
Thanks Chirpy. Sorry, I'm like, hey, what's with all those
traffic cones? They're everywhere. It's like trying to navigate through
the van hoove A law for asteroid belt when your
warp drive is out.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
Killed me.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
Speaking of driving, you can always bot my car in
the parking lot by the bumper stickers.
Speaker 1 (11:59):
Toffly. My other car is a Saturn black holes suck.
Speaker 3 (12:07):
Hunk.
Speaker 2 (12:07):
If you're from Alpha Centauri, I'm an astronomer, not an astrologer.
Speaker 7 (12:14):
Dang it.
Speaker 2 (12:15):
And of course my favorite. My wife asked me to
give up stargazing. I sure will miss her suck just kidding' han.
People are always coming up to me and saying, astro nerd,
do you believe in extraterrestrial intelligence?
Speaker 1 (12:31):
And I always say, heck, I'm still looking for some
around here.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
Around here because people are so stupid sometimes. But you know, folks,
I've actually seen an alien. In fact, he's painting my
house right now.
Speaker 1 (12:53):
It's wild.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
But seriously, the spaceship door opened up, and this alien
says to me. He says, I come in peace. And
I said to him, lucky you. I got here in
a pacer. A pacer.
Speaker 1 (13:10):
Should I be doing this acting?
Speaker 3 (13:13):
Cling on?
Speaker 2 (13:14):
So I was out in California, where said lend, one
of my friends invited me to a star party.
Speaker 1 (13:20):
Well, the joke was on me. I was there for
an hour and I finally.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
Went up to a guy and said, hey, Mel Gibson,
where are all the telescopes? Then he blamed it on
the jews and we did tequila shots till two am.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
Thank goodness, he was able to drive. I was hammered.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
It's hard being a Southern astronomer though, you know, here's
the top five ways you can tell you're a redneck astronomer.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
Number five, I've.
Speaker 2 (13:49):
Got a Tasco Galaxy telescope with the starfinder options up
on blocked in the front yard. Number four you use
bacon fat to grease your declination bearing.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
Three, there's a cup holder on your tripod. Two you
call the dog star old old Deep.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
And the number one way to tell that you're a
redneck astronomer. You use pictures of the flame nebula to
get in the mead. When you want to get frisky,
you have pictures of them. Whoa, hey, racing fat boys.
Sit down every time you stand up in front of
the spotlight. I think I'm missing any clip missing an eclipse?
Speaker 7 (14:40):
Is this thing on? Okay?
Speaker 6 (14:44):
All right, okay, thanks astroner.
Speaker 7 (14:47):
Let's hear it for him out.
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Hold on, take a chirpy. I got some risk management
stuff that Billy rais. Yeah, maybe next time, but I
was killing no, no, no, take a hike.
Speaker 6 (14:55):
Okay, take up space. Hey, I do what?
Speaker 7 (14:57):
Get your anus on out of here?
Speaker 1 (14:58):
Hey, that's good?
Speaker 7 (14:59):
Can I use your ain it?
Speaker 3 (15:28):
Good? Tuesday Morning, Big Show us on the radio Action.
Speaker 12 (15:33):
Welcome to John Boy and Billy Playhouse today's episode The
Blue Suit. As our story opens, the director from Brushywood
Funeral is comforting the widow of Larry Finkelstein.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
This is Finkelstein. We can't tell you how sorry we
are for your loss, but rest assured, my staff and
I are prepared to do whatever it takes to make
sure your husband's final wishes are matt. Unfortunately, I have
to leave right now. But my my uncle, Bill Silvers
a is a new man since well Brushy would use
(16:10):
cars burnt down, nothing suspicious there by the way, So
so Bill won't be into to help you.
Speaker 13 (16:18):
Wow, thank you.
Speaker 4 (16:22):
It's all keep about so suddenly. I mean, you know,
one minute we're having dinner at his company's awards banquet.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Next thing you know, we're well, well we're here.
Speaker 3 (16:32):
Yes, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 6 (16:37):
I know what.
Speaker 3 (16:39):
I'm the new guy, Bill Silvers. No one ever expects
choke on a chicken bone. But your husband does look
very handsome in this tuxedo. So at least you'll save
some money by not having to buy him a new suit.
Speaker 9 (16:51):
Well, mister Silvers, is it? How dare you make this
about money? For your information? My Larry was wearing a
blue suit the first time I saw him, and I
want him to be buried in a blue suit, no
matter what.
Speaker 3 (17:04):
The extra of course, of course, Missus Finklesteen, Well we'll
take care of it. You need not worry. Please go home,
get some rests. We'll have everything ready before the service
on Sunday.
Speaker 5 (17:14):
A few days later, the last mourner files out of
Larry Finkelstein's funeral.
Speaker 14 (17:21):
Mister Silver's. Oh, mister Silvers, yes, missus, I just wanted
to tell you how happy I was with everything, and
the blue suit that your staff picked for my Larry
was absolutely perfect. Now I realize a suit like that
doesn't come inexpensively, So how much.
Speaker 7 (17:39):
Do I owe you?
Speaker 3 (17:41):
Not a thing? Is luck? What happened we had another
client's body, or rather the same not as your husband's.
That man was wearing a new blue suit since his
wife didn't care what he was wearing when he was buried.
Well weave, Oh.
Speaker 9 (17:53):
My god, you switched Larry's suit with another dead there.
Speaker 3 (17:57):
Oh no, no, don't be ridiculous, madam. Well, that would
not only be a moral but possible even down right illegal. Beside,
your husband sooth was more than two sizeses larger than his.
Speaker 4 (18:08):
Oh, Okay, Thank goodness, so we switched.
Speaker 3 (18:11):
Their heads us.
Speaker 5 (18:19):
We hope you've enjoyed John Boy and Billy playhouse.
Speaker 3 (18:22):
By the way, will So manager retrieved the chicken bowl?
Would you like it for your scrub?
Speaker 11 (18:26):
You tune in again next time when we'll hear the
creepy old grave digger at Rushywood Cemetery say.
Speaker 3 (18:33):
Hey, big man, let me hold a dollar.
Speaker 2 (18:38):
This is sour beef Chokes, the world's most political wrestler
with my personal valet at made squeeze Sweaty buddy.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
Don't squeeze me too tight, I might you are adorable.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
And before every fight in our hot of the ring,
we warm up with two of the greatest patriots on
the airwaves, the World Heavyweight tag team Comedy Champions.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
Party about that.
Speaker 3 (18:58):
Half part that John Boy Billy Big shall.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
Be whatever you'll say, Sweatie, let me give you a hug.
Speaker 7 (19:05):
I warned you.
Speaker 3 (19:44):
Good morning. It's big show on the radio coming up
in minutes. Astro Nerd tries again. Man, do y'all have
a favorite Astro Nerd song?
Speaker 5 (19:54):
Nope, I actually do.
Speaker 4 (20:00):
Is a loser baby.
Speaker 3 (20:03):
That kind of one bag when he had his head
in the clouds or chasing that comedy. You don't like this,
Maybe it's really the vanilla ice that I really like.
You can just take picturing the astro nerd here.
Speaker 6 (20:17):
What's enjoy It's next one his bike gwn named Kelly
willis the original version.
Speaker 7 (20:23):
Anyway, we put some junior nations stink on it and
came out like this.
Speaker 6 (20:29):
You can test the water, Boddy, it ain't no sin.
The doors open, honey, Come on in to the Trainer
of Love.
Speaker 7 (20:41):
Take a journey.
Speaker 6 (20:42):
Let me be your guide. Will double have been a
single wide? That's the Trainer of Love? Now the Trailer
of Love don't look like much, Buddy, could look a
lot better.
Speaker 1 (20:57):
Will the wallan's touched?
Speaker 6 (20:58):
You can wait for a fatter that's a cut of thub.
Or you can take your own chenses. That's the trailer.
Come on over and enjoy yourself, kick back and have
a beer.
Speaker 3 (21:15):
Twelve. That's the Trailer of Love.
Speaker 6 (21:22):
It's a party and it never stops unless a neighbor
woman calls the.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
Cops to the trailer love.
Speaker 8 (21:36):
Kill man.
Speaker 3 (21:42):
Play this day like you stole it?
Speaker 6 (21:45):
You what you did? Sir? Sorry?
Speaker 2 (21:49):
Better no.
Speaker 6 (21:55):
Show up like to be a newborn friend. You never
know what coming around things. That's the trader love saddle
up because of time to ride, seeing double in a
single wide, that's the trader love Well, trailer love, don't
(22:20):
look like much body, it'll feel a life better with
a wall that's touch. You can spend your life wishing
number starts above, but you can take your chances.
Speaker 13 (22:29):
That's the trader love, Trailer loves, trailer love, trailer.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
Trader.
Speaker 13 (22:44):
That's trailer love, trailer love, trailer love, and hidser brush.
Speaker 3 (23:05):
Good morning, Big Shows on the radio. Coming up. We
played John Boy Jeopardy after we hear astro Nerd trying
to get somebody's gonna win a Southern Ees varrioting pack.
You heard all the great benefits of him. Now's the
best time to try Southernees. It's not just a product,
is a way of life. Go to the Big Show
dot com click on the Southern East banner. Get twenty
five percent off using code JBB. Do that to check
(23:28):
out why supplies last must be twenty one to win.
Ain't a play for it in minutes. First, here we.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
Go, do the introduction. What do the introduction?
Speaker 3 (23:40):
Really?
Speaker 1 (23:40):
He'll be worth it. I got some doupe material in.
Speaker 3 (23:43):
Day okay, And here he is, folks, This time he's
not just taking up space. His new material is out
of this world. He's destined to be a star. The
guy who believes that Mars needs comedy boldly going where
no comedian has gone before. Am I supposed to read
(24:05):
all of this?
Speaker 1 (24:06):
Now? I think they got it? Skip to the inn.
Speaker 3 (24:10):
Here's laugh Troue nerd.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
Whack of whack of whacka. Wait a minute, I was
on a roll.
Speaker 3 (24:17):
Why a whack a whacker is not a roll?
Speaker 1 (24:19):
What's what's the problem?
Speaker 3 (24:20):
Well, your introduction is full of outer space reference. Laugh,
true nerd doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 1 (24:25):
Good call JB. Try it again. Okay, and from the top.
I'm not gonna take her from the top.
Speaker 3 (24:32):
It's only a four hour show't your Okay? Here's Astra nerds.
Speaker 1 (24:37):
Whack a whack of whacka. You already did that right.
Speaker 14 (24:42):
Here?
Speaker 1 (24:42):
Oh man, women be shopping, Women be shopping. That's right,
that's right.
Speaker 2 (24:49):
When my wife goes shopping and says bye bye, she
really means bye bye.
Speaker 1 (24:56):
Forget about the price of gas.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
The most expensive vehicle to operate per mile is the
shopping cart.
Speaker 1 (25:03):
This guy knows what I'm talking about.
Speaker 2 (25:07):
Every time my wife goes shopping she comes home with
everything but money.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
What's up with that? About time?
Speaker 2 (25:16):
In fact, the other day she went to the corner
market and came home with two corners.
Speaker 6 (25:24):
That is whack.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
My wife had a typical shopping day.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
She came home with an empty wallet, two parking tickets,
and three pages of trading stamps.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
Trading stamps. He was an old joke.
Speaker 3 (25:38):
It was such a terrible economy. Do you really think
shopping humor is a way to go good?
Speaker 1 (25:43):
Call? JB? Is this part of the show, Well, you
pulled the plug on my best material I'm looking for.
I'm looking for my plan B. Maybe she'd try McDonald's.
That's good.
Speaker 2 (25:55):
Can I get that?
Speaker 1 (25:58):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (25:58):
I mean got these saying it might have our audience.
Speaker 2 (26:01):
Hey man, my material is universal universally bad.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
That's a good one too, man, I think we're doing here.
Speaker 2 (26:10):
Wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait here's
some good ones.
Speaker 1 (26:15):
Signs you might be drinking too much. See this is
perfect for the rubes.
Speaker 9 (26:19):
That what?
Speaker 1 (26:21):
I'm sorry your show? That's better? I go ahead, whack
a whack a whack, skipped it a bit, dang it.
Speaker 2 (26:30):
You know you're drinking too much when the doctor find
traces of blood in your alcohol stream.
Speaker 7 (26:37):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (26:38):
You know you're drinking too much when you wake up
in bed, still dress but you're underwears on the lamp.
Speaker 1 (26:45):
Who hasn't that happened too?
Speaker 2 (26:48):
You know you're drinking too much when the only job
you're qualified for is senator from Massachusetts.
Speaker 3 (26:54):
A Teddy Kennedy joke. Too soon, it's a little dating.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
And another haven't you learned by now that the more
you interrupt me?
Speaker 2 (27:07):
I start you talking in loud and fast monotone because
I'm afraid that no one will lift it to me
because I'm.
Speaker 1 (27:12):
So boring and irrelevant.
Speaker 2 (27:14):
And then to draw attention to myself, I start to
throw around confusing phrases and strange words like dark matter
of tongue, no equinox and quark astro.
Speaker 3 (27:22):
Nerds quark quarks the astro nerd.
Speaker 7 (27:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
To be honest, your material is just too I don't.
Speaker 1 (27:31):
Know, boring.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
You think my material is boring? You should see my
sex life. I'm kind of in a dry spill lately.
I only make whoope. In month's ending in Arch, my
wife told me I wanted to moan, but I didn't
have time.
Speaker 3 (27:50):
Now, I don't tell anybody really wants to hear about
your sex life, quark. Sorry, but it's back to square one.
Whack saga night Astronaut not astronud. That's good too, Can
I use that one? Right? Yes, let's go back to
(28:14):
the astronaut music here in a few minutes. A y'all,
let's play John BOYD Jeopardy. Let's jump right in here.
Nearly twice as many professional cycling competitors suffer injuries involving
this body part than a professional football player, the butt.
(28:36):
You know, you need one of those big old padded
bicycle season like I have. Have you seen my is
like a fur? Is like really a small animal that
I'm saying.
Speaker 5 (28:44):
Right, obviously you have no padding naturally in that area.
Speaker 3 (28:48):
Let's go yes, all right, Well, well, what's y'all got?
Speaker 6 (28:51):
One?
Speaker 3 (28:51):
Eight hundred big show? You told free line across America.
We played John Boyd Jeopardy. Next, Good morning, it's a
(29:21):
big show on the radio. We're going Tuesday, January sixteenth.
Today's feature track from the Big Show bid Box Reven Goog,
The Ten Commandments, and the Preacher's Bicycle. The classic We're
waiting for you in the big boxes. Sere's a keyword
bicycle when you hit the Big Show dot Com as
of my Wonderful Thing giveaway number ninety one at Bryce
(29:42):
Young Heisman Trophy Commemorate in football, where I started keeping
the stats. His first games was a Carolina Panther until
I gave up. You can see it all right there.
We're gonna have this up there for y'all until the
Friday before the Super Bowl, so we can be a
part or play all backs. Come and see what you
(30:04):
wrote on it with. Do you do with a sharpie
or sharpie? Oh yeah, sharpy of course I do have two.
Game six is so one of them is actually Game seven,
but I was kind of losing enterants around area. So
same for yourself when you go to the Big Show
dot Com.
Speaker 11 (30:21):
And right now let's play Yes Live across America. It's
John Boreman and your Dead Bundy and now a man
who says the hardest part of learning of riding a
bicycle is the pavement.
Speaker 3 (30:40):
John Boy, Thank you, said Steven out of Toccoa, Georgia.
Good morning, Stephen, Hey, going good man, going good. Welcome
in here. You know you got the first shot at
John Boy Jeopardy. Must be feeling pretty good about yourself
(31:02):
and this body part, well pretty good.
Speaker 10 (31:07):
Yeah, that's the first time I called I was.
Speaker 3 (31:11):
Man, Well, let's move you down, no boy, welcome Steven. Well,
let's I review this question here. Nearly twice as many
professional cycling competitors suffer injuries involving this body part than
professional football players. So what are you thinking down now
to course, Steven?
Speaker 10 (31:31):
Ah, Well, I was thinking I watch Monday Night football
and they pass a law they hitting their heads all
the time, so they ain't letting them hit the head.
So I'm must say, a head injury in the brain.
Speaker 3 (31:42):
Okay, you see all those targeting where they'll call it
and then make you go to the locker room. Yeah,
protecting that brain. Well, let's see. Is it the brain?
Speaker 7 (31:54):
You've got it?
Speaker 13 (31:54):
Buddy?
Speaker 3 (31:58):
Wow, man, that's something I guess. You know you're right
in the pavement. This is very hard advice, man, But
they got them little helmets. Maybe they need some better gear.
Speaker 11 (32:07):
Yeah, well, you can still have a brain injury with
a helmet on, and if the impact is hard.
Speaker 5 (32:13):
I mean, look at.
Speaker 11 (32:15):
The brace car driver Ernie Irvin, Sorry, Ernie Irvin, he
had a massive brain injury and he was certainly wearing
a helmet.
Speaker 15 (32:21):
Right.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Well, the sports with the highest number of brain injury
cycling is number one. If football is number two, then
it's baseball, basketball, and water sports.
Speaker 4 (32:32):
Cut understand basketball.
Speaker 10 (32:35):
Job boy, I'd say anything you going two hundred miles
an hour in you're gonna get a brain injury when
you come to a sudden stop.
Speaker 3 (32:42):
I can see that. And you know in that like
earn Hart when tragically it was killed there, heytnam in
since they put the Hans device, is really is helping
a lot, you know, Yeah, it's still very dangerous. And
tayl your question on basketball the slippery hardwood floor, they
bang their heads when they fall. No, I kept hitting
my head on the rim.
Speaker 16 (33:05):
And as far as swimming, good espectly from diving. Okay,
water sports in there for you. All right, Well we
learned some stuff, y'all. Try to be careful out there.
And Stephen, you've got the big old Southern East riding back,
head down to you and the koha.
Speaker 3 (33:23):
Oh right, alright, buddy, hang out. Why about the hours
top of your news? All right? Dune the Astro Nerd
Tuesday Tune with Nerds Heading the Cloud good morning, big
(34:18):
shows on the radio. Wow, just turn into a nicer
nerd celebration. Here heartner Junior nation ben uh you tune.
Just ride with a cover letter. We'll hoitd down in
about twenty minutes. Right now by, when the NERD's head
was still in the clouds, I went to.
Speaker 1 (34:41):
The Star Party to stare into the sky.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
I brought it doesn't telescopes because I'm a nerdy guy.
Speaker 1 (34:53):
I'm the star of the Star Party. I'm kind of
a big deal.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
They all say, I'm living proof that aliens are really.
Speaker 7 (35:06):
But it's dark out now, let's turn this mother out.
Speaker 15 (35:13):
If you like boring hobbies, then Astrata MEAs far out.
Speaker 7 (35:20):
Turnout there was pretty huge.
Speaker 2 (35:23):
We had nearly ten that's twice as many as last year,
but it was mostly men.
Speaker 1 (35:33):
We saw a meteor shower. It was pretty rad, truth
be told.
Speaker 7 (35:41):
It's the only shower most it ever had. But it's
dark out. Now, let's turn this mother out.
Speaker 15 (35:53):
If you like boring hobbies, then Astronao meats far out.
Speaker 7 (36:07):
Looked at all the same old stars. There was nothing new.
Speaker 2 (36:13):
We pulled our cash and sent someone to buy us
all a broom.
Speaker 1 (36:20):
They came back with a tall boy.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
We passed that beer around, turned up that song from
Star Wars.
Speaker 1 (36:30):
And everyone got down.
Speaker 7 (36:33):
But it's dark out now, let's turn this mother out.
Speaker 15 (36:39):
If you like boring hobbies, then astronomy is far out.
Speaker 2 (36:54):
Everyone got tipsy and stripped down to our socks.
Speaker 7 (37:00):
The cops showed up and tased us all.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
It was quite a shock.
Speaker 2 (37:07):
They took us all downtown and held us without bail.
You'd be surprised how many months that you see in jail.
Speaker 7 (37:20):
It's dark catock. Now, let's turn this mother out.
Speaker 15 (37:26):
If you like borring hobbies, then astronomyas far out.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
Good morning, it's a big shaw on the radio, Tuesday,
January sixteenth. There we go, all right. I got to
see Duday. We got it done. The players this cover
letter from heart Hey perverts.
Speaker 6 (38:15):
Yeah we go.
Speaker 3 (38:16):
Well. I scrubbed off another gooding over the weekend, and
when I got through with that, I recorded a new song.
But I'm uh huh. I'd give you the wares and
wy fors about my inspirations and whatnot, but this in
here pretty much speaks for itself, all right. Keep them
straight up to our hoyt. Let's listen.
Speaker 8 (38:46):
Well, I wake up in the morning, stumbling out of bed,
Fire up the coffee pot, try to clear my head.
Speaker 7 (39:01):
Tune in the.
Speaker 8 (39:02):
Bit show to get the latest word, just in time
to hear him picking on a boy named Astro Nerds.
Old Nerds, plump eat up about.
Speaker 7 (39:19):
A strong me.
Speaker 8 (39:22):
But the stuff he talks about don't make the lock
of sense to me. He's got a big brook telor
on the top of his head, and when he starts
talking space you'll wish that you were dead. Don't talk
(39:43):
too long on astro Nerd. Astro Nerds, you've got to
weirdes ruff. I think I ever heard people say he's
used Listen, then people have the point because astro Nerd
(40:05):
is the weirdest sucker to ever hit the joint. Old
Hermi sadd Nerd don't like him a bit. When Nerd
starts talking hermy tries to make quick.
Speaker 3 (40:31):
It's a big destruction.
Speaker 8 (40:33):
When it's time for the races, makes Hermi hit up
Ray for for a morning shot a boot. Leave me alone,
Astro Nerd, astro Nerd, you talk the weirdest crap.
Speaker 7 (40:54):
I think I ever heard.
Speaker 3 (40:58):
People say he's.
Speaker 8 (40:59):
A nut job, and they might just have a point
because astro Nerd is the weirdest sucker to ever hit
the joint. One deal, Astro Nerd will up and despar
(41:20):
and I recognize just the thing that all Hermie Walshton here.
They'll never be another Nerd to take his place when
that flying sauce takes him back to latter space. Leave
(41:41):
me alone, Astro Nerd. Astro Nerds, you talk the weirdest
craft I think I've ever heard. People say. He must
have got dropped on his head and burst. Cauls Astrow
(42:03):
Nerd is the weirdest suckered ever walked.
Speaker 1 (42:07):
Ear Hey, did I miss something
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
Popular Podcasts
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy And Charlamagne Tha God!
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.