December 24, 2024 • 50 mins
Tuesday (pt 1 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, we’ll hop in the Big Show Time Machine and travel back to December 23, 2020 for a special Encore Edition of the show!
℗®© 2024 John Boy & Billy, Inc.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hello, big Chow fans. The holidays are coming quick, aren't they.
I picked a good Encore show for you today. This
one took place in one of those rare situations where
we actually worked live right before Christmas. It originally aired
on Wednesday, December twenty third, twenty twenty.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
It should be chock full of Christmasy stuff. Enjoy the show.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
Doggy backing up to my nurse, she's going, I answered him, Well,
there is.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Wednesday, December twenty third. All day yesterday I was called today,
thank you. I was calling today Christmas Eve, and uh, yeah,
well it is our Christmas Eve because this is our
last day before Christmas. So I'm sorry about that. Any confusion.
Speaker 4 (00:57):
There you go. I think that was the rough cut.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
Okay, so are we talking about the day's December twenty third, Yes,
our last show before Christmas? All right, So it is
today is the day before Christmas Eve? Yes, yes, but
yesterday that's not Yeah. I was saying that all day yesterday.
Speaker 4 (01:20):
I thought, wow, he's got control of the calendar.
Speaker 5 (01:23):
It's a Festivus miracle.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
But no.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
What's funny is that there's five people in the room
and nobody else just caught it until that proves it.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
I think you sometimes y'all don't listen to me.
Speaker 4 (01:35):
Until I listened to the podcast, I didn't catch it.
Speaker 5 (01:38):
Between that and everybody having COVID brain, nobody.
Speaker 6 (01:40):
Knows what it is.
Speaker 4 (01:42):
I'm sure.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
What'd you say, Billy? We are sure? It's Wednesday, December
twenty third, all right, all right, and it is fest
of Us to day. I got a lot of problems
with you, feeble, You're good. He's here. In December twenty third,
Fest of Us commemorates a holiday episode of the television
comedy Seinfeld, aired in nineteen ninety seven. How about that, Oh,
(02:07):
I did well festivals.
Speaker 5 (02:11):
I don't think we'll make it to the feats of stream.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
We got our three days in this we saved up.
Pull out our first prize pack. Get you ready for Alpbers.
That's the first on the agenda. On this day before
Christmas Eve, Big shows on the radio, Good morning, Big
shows on a radio. First prize pack were playing for
today a Happy Herd prize pick. You know, Happy Herd
makes the highest quality of tractors, minerals and feed for deer,
(02:41):
bear and hogs in the hunting industry. As we as
parts of the country we head toward the end of
deer season. I think ours goes out like January first.
So then of course down south and Alabama, Mississippi boys
got it going on, and some spots of Rudd ain't
even made it down there yet. You ready heldebig show
(03:01):
dot Com. Click on the Happy Herd link interco JBB
twenty twenty at check out, get ten percent off. Look,
get you set up to win you some right here.
Three dates in history where we get our categores. December
twenty third, nineteen seventy two, the world record for consecutive
push ups was set by Richard Knight. He did twenty
(03:23):
five thousand, two hundred and twenty two on a hard surface.
Took him eleven hours and fourteen minutes to accomplish the task. Richard,
by the way, was eight years old at the time.
Speaker 5 (03:35):
Oh well, please, it was easy for you.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
You didn't have all that wait to push up, did it?
Speaker 5 (03:39):
He didn't have as far to go?
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Yeah? Nineteen seventy two, All right, move up to six.
Arnold Schwarzenegger broke his leg while skiing with his family
in Sun Valley, idahot me to the chapel. It was California, governor.
Then it was taken to a local hospital for X
rays revealed he had fractured his femur. Is not a fema,
(04:05):
an Austrian Schwarzenegger is an experienced skier. Well. Three days
later in Santa Monica, he underwent surgery to repair the
break and finally was On this date, No. Nine, a
man who triggered a major alert by falsely claiming that
his son was adrift in a helium balloon was sentenced
to ninety days in jail and his wife to twenty.
(04:29):
So you'll remember this. Richard Heene and his wife ma'am
said in October that their son had been carried off
by the balloon, but the war was eventually found hiding
at home. He apologized the rescue workers and the community
in the Colorado courtroom. The judge ordered four years of
supervised probation for the couple and banned them from receiving
(04:50):
any form of financial benefit from the case.
Speaker 5 (04:53):
They left break his femur.
Speaker 4 (04:56):
I never understood what their motive was. Why would you
do that just to be on TV? How mad you've
got to be on TV?
Speaker 2 (05:04):
I no, no, but I was some of the th
there's nobody in America.
Speaker 5 (05:07):
That's weird about trying to get on TV.
Speaker 7 (05:09):
You know this.
Speaker 4 (05:10):
I mean, how do you get a payday out of that?
Speaker 2 (05:13):
I don't know. The George took care of that if
they could figure out a way. Yeah, well, good news.
Speaker 5 (05:17):
You're gonna be on Cops.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
That's about it, alright. But there's our categories one eight
hundred big shows you tore free line, toll free line.
Also we play out birds next, Good morning, Big Shows
(05:59):
all ready to go to you. Wednesday, December twenty third
video of the day, brought you by asked Scara Labs
Rudolph the regular Reindeer. Check it out to get the
chants at the Big Show dot com? Are your Christmas fun?
And right now get out winning.
Speaker 7 (06:18):
Look at.
Speaker 4 (06:21):
Upburst. Let's play Upburst. It's the game that anyone can win.
John Boy and Bully to give.
Speaker 5 (06:29):
The prizes from the Big Prize Beer.
Speaker 2 (06:33):
Let's go contested number one. This should really be a
lot of fun.
Speaker 4 (06:39):
Win you're playing Upburst. Have a hurry up and guest
time you love the best time.
Speaker 6 (06:45):
You love a big shots.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
Let's say had of James from Saulsbury, North Carolina. We
have a shot. Good morning, James.
Speaker 8 (07:04):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
How's it going? Hey, anything gone?
Speaker 9 (07:07):
Good?
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Glad you made it in here. Buddy, you've been up
long enough to hear the three days in history. Let's
get through the categories. You ready to go, Yes, sir,
we'll go. Then in five seconds, three exercises, ready go, push.
Speaker 7 (07:24):
Up, up and pull up ma'am.
Speaker 2 (07:28):
All right now we need three famous skiing spots ready go.
Speaker 10 (07:36):
As uh.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
And for the wind, three places to hide in your house.
Ready to go. Let's call it under in the all around.
Speaker 5 (07:54):
I bet it didn't get away and it be really good.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
Good work. Have your prize back headed over to saws
wearing for you.
Speaker 7 (08:03):
Got it?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
I appreciate you? All right, body man Christmas hang on
with jacket Christmas bottom of the hour and tell me
to tell of your news Christmas tune from Hoarding the boys.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
I saw Dembard.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
Beat up Santa Claus, no up. Good morning, Big shows
(09:00):
on the radio the day before Christmas Eve. You heard
me yesterday saying yesterday was a day before Christmas Eve.
Sorry for the concase.
Speaker 4 (09:09):
You know how he do well?
Speaker 2 (09:11):
Then if you want to get technically, it was a day.
It was a day, four day, he goes. This is
our last show before Christmas since we're awful Christmas Eve
and Christmas Day this year. Okay, so it's all working out.
Let's celebrate went a Christmas dude from hoyting a junior
Nation band. I don't get chuck squat for Christmas. All
(09:41):
my friends that broke ca ast me.
Speaker 11 (09:44):
I'll never find a present Sunday to Christmas Tree.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
I got nowhere to have a stocking. I't got no
fire's place. All this galluts up to me looked like
us through rent from matter space. Christmas show can be.
I could use a nice cold but show cut.
Speaker 8 (10:10):
Use some cheer.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
For Christmass me. I don't get much Christmas.
Speaker 11 (10:24):
Section, got no girlfriend by my side. It's hard to
get promatic living in the same.
Speaker 8 (10:34):
White My roommate Delbert.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
He's a handful of biggess gool. You ever seen his
girlfriend gave him COVID.
Speaker 11 (10:44):
We all had two quarantines. Were in hot to the irs,
A real bad case of ibs.
Speaker 8 (10:54):
Writ my whole day.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
For Christmas fIF fee.
Speaker 11 (11:07):
The body shot by run is going down the tunes.
It's been months and months since I last seen some food.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
Since not a lot of start mistaking.
Speaker 4 (11:23):
I've done a lot from breaking.
Speaker 11 (11:26):
I've stop in the mud, so sad break somethun.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
I don't ask for much this Christmas. Sayda do what
you can do.
Speaker 11 (11:39):
Drop me off a nice coat, twelve pack. That is
all asking.
Speaker 4 (11:44):
You have me.
Speaker 12 (11:46):
Beat this Christmas bunk well, im good.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
On Christmas drunk, make my whole.
Speaker 11 (11:55):
All at for Christmas.
Speaker 7 (12:00):
He's be.
Speaker 11 (12:04):
Hold on for Christmas.
Speaker 8 (12:07):
Sis be.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
Ho for Christmas.
Speaker 13 (12:13):
Sis be.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Holla for Christmas. Sis be and hazard us say good
(12:58):
morning it is it makes you want to radio rulling
do your December third. Let's get this call coming on
in front of the road. Good morning, big show.
Speaker 8 (13:10):
Well, good morning there, John Boy and Billy, and good
morning to all are beloved friends, other and radio land.
This airs a Reverend Billy Ray Collins from the Sword
of Joshua, Independent Folk. I spoke Pennycoastal Assembly just off
State Road twenty three on the Frontage Road. Oh friends,
it's Christmas season, the time of year we're all spending
(13:32):
a bunch of money. We ain't got to buy a
bunch of people. We don't like a bunch of presents.
They don't want all to honor a tiny little baby
born in the manger. So all the world could come
together for a December to remember over at the Lexus plate. Oh, preacher,
(13:53):
you sound like you in a bad mood. We know
you ain't real hot on Christmas time, but you ain't
gonna come in here and try to ruin it for everybody. Well,
let me just say this about that. The way the
past few months has gone, it's a tad late to
worry about something getting runch And the way I look
at it, Christmas ain't supposed to be for everybody anyway.
(14:16):
Used to be for Christians to celebrate the birth of
our Lord and Savior. Oh but nowadays the only time
Jesus Christ comes out of most folks mouth is when
the car in front of them don't pull off when
the light turns grain. And I'll tell you another thing,
This modernistic soul called Christmas music ain't helping my mood.
None needed. Nowadays, every wooie booger with a record deal
(14:40):
comes out with a Christmas album, whether they need to
or not. They don't show a liqu of interest into
Lord Jesus the rest of the year. Oh but come
December they all want to be the next being.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
Cost me.
Speaker 8 (14:52):
Well, honey, if I want to hear what Lady God
Josh sounds like singing jangle bells. I'll chuck the cat
in the woodship and the next time Lowe's makes me
listen to old unsaved, hell bound Stevie Nicks sing Silent Night,
I'm taking my business over to the homey. Sorry about that.
(15:13):
Normally I swallowed my reservations and really embraced the whole
church Christmas celebration deal. But it ain't been easy this year.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
Friends.
Speaker 8 (15:23):
This year rent right down to comode most of our
members as old white folks heat up with underlying conditions.
We had to cancel the candlelight service, and then the
Christmas Singalong got scrubbed because the church choir turned out
to be a bunch of virus shed and slab gun
and the Pets and Things store went out of business,
(15:43):
so there wasn't no animals to rent for the live
Nativity in the church parking lots. In other words, our
whole holiday action plan this year turned out to be
what the gimph that Stole Christmas used to call stink stink. Although,
if old doctor Grauchi is right, this new vaccine is
(16:07):
gonna start knocking the covert nineteen out over the next
few months and may I just say I hope he's right,
because if I had to figure out this computer church
stuff much longer, I'm gonna go slap out of my mind.
Like to close on a positive note, if I may,
y'all can still surf on over to our face Tube
(16:29):
page for the Sword of Joshua Sermon of the Month
this month. It's entitled Grandma about got runned over by
the Devil's reindeer, but Jesus reached over and yanked her
out of the fire at the last minute. All the
best of you and yours from your Bible beaten buddies
here at the Sword of Joshua, Independent Full of Gospel,
(16:50):
Pennycostal Assembly, just off State Road twenty three. All the room,
but don't come out and see us because we're closed
a blip. Here's a Reverend Billy Ray Collins reminding you
it's time to turn so you don't burn Yon Boy
and Billy Happy Honda days.
Speaker 4 (17:13):
What go now?
Speaker 10 (17:15):
Go now?
Speaker 4 (17:16):
Okay, Good morning, Stan Higgins.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
Here.
Speaker 14 (17:20):
Nothing makes my day like a chance to pipe in
on John Boy and Billy here in the big show.
Speaker 4 (17:25):
But I don't come here just to see them. I'm
not a gay.
Speaker 14 (17:29):
I come here for the eye, Candy Bab's Jackie and Theater,
and Fanny's got a sweet too.
Speaker 4 (17:35):
How is that.
Speaker 2 (18:09):
Good morning? It's a big sew on the radio coming
out ten minutes. Yeah, we hear you, request y'all the
classic Christmas Cooking with Rayper. We'll play us in John
Boyd Jeopardy here in a few minutes. But first a
sound of the season, yues which season?
Speaker 9 (18:42):
I came apon a road to kill you, A sorrowful
sight to be. He lay upon the high raising his
body was stiff and cold.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
I bad.
Speaker 9 (19:09):
He never saw the car careening through the snow.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
The light shone brodly.
Speaker 4 (19:25):
His eyes, and then they laid him low.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
I came a mo road, killed him and lifted him
for will joy snuffys of bad be sloppy Joe B.
Speaker 11 (20:02):
Castro There rely get stuck in your team?
Speaker 7 (20:14):
Will please?
Speaker 5 (20:16):
The blue sprung this head upon.
Speaker 7 (20:23):
Our county side site to.
Speaker 5 (20:45):
Aca is old to bring chu as the the.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Good morning big shows on a radio coming up. We
played John Boyd Jefreardy. You can win a mount Olive
pickle prize, Pug. Spending time with family and friends has
never been more important. For nearly one hundred years, mount
Olive Pickle Company has been part of holiday traditions and
our customers of the reason we are committed to excellence.
Thank you for the mount Olive Pickle Company family. Hang on,
(21:48):
we'll play in minutes versa holiday classic.
Speaker 6 (21:52):
It's time once again for Cooking with Rafer with your
host Robert d Rafer.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
No, no, no where in abu five minutes. Just stare up.
Speaker 6 (22:01):
Hey, all, that's rave. On today's show, we'd like to
welcome a very special guest. Where's that card?
Speaker 8 (22:08):
Oh? You here?
Speaker 6 (22:09):
This entertainment guru Martha Stewart is America's best known expert
on home entertainment, but her sister is an expert in
her own right, and her new book is called one
hundred and one Free and Nearly Free Household Hints. Please
welcome my special guest, Marcy Stewart.
Speaker 15 (22:27):
Well, thank you, Bob. It's a pleasure to be here.
Speaker 6 (22:30):
No problem. You want something to drink?
Speaker 15 (22:33):
You have any dry white wines?
Speaker 6 (22:35):
I look like I have any dry white wines. How
about a shout a gentleman jack, No thanks, I'm having
me a taste.
Speaker 15 (22:45):
My goodness, that's an awfully big taste.
Speaker 6 (22:48):
I'm a big boy, so Anyways, what's this new book
of yours about.
Speaker 15 (22:53):
Well, Bob, My famous sister Martha sometimes gets accused of
being a little elaborate in some of her household jack
I meanwhile, with always the more practical one in the family.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
You've a little bit better looking as years.
Speaker 11 (23:08):
Thanks.
Speaker 15 (23:09):
Anyway, this book is a collection of some of my
favorite handy household tips that'll cost you practically nothing.
Speaker 6 (23:16):
Speaking of free, you're sure you don't want some of this?
Speaker 4 (23:19):
No, no thanks?
Speaker 6 (23:20):
Suit yourself just means more for me. So did I
ask you about the book?
Speaker 7 (23:31):
Yes?
Speaker 13 (23:31):
You did?
Speaker 6 (23:32):
Oh yeah, household hen so lay sime on us.
Speaker 15 (23:36):
Well, I'd be happy to now. We all love golden
brown pancakes at breakfast time, and if you use a
turkey baster to squeeze the batter onto the hot griddle,
you'll have perfectly shaped pancakes every time.
Speaker 6 (23:48):
How about the frozen ones you put in the microwave.
The hardest part of that is you get them out
of plastic bag.
Speaker 15 (23:54):
What's next, Well, if you're having a hard boiled egg
with that breakfast, an easy way to that your eggshells
from cracking is to add a pinch of salt to
the water before boiling.
Speaker 6 (24:05):
What difference does it make if they cracked and you're
gonna take the shells off anyway?
Speaker 2 (24:09):
Come on, what else you got?
Speaker 15 (24:11):
Well, as long as we're boiling water on the stove.
Now here's a tip for perfect corn on the cop
We can add a pinch of sugar to the water
while cooking sugar huh, and it helps bring out the
corn's natural sweetness.
Speaker 6 (24:27):
On the kind of corn iBOT comes in a can. Well,
speaking of corn, let's just get a little bit here, Bob.
Speaker 15 (24:37):
You might want to take it. Take a little easy there.
Speaker 6 (24:41):
Don't you worry about me, sweet hunt, I was knocking
these back when you was still in diapers. Press on,
press on?
Speaker 15 (24:47):
Okay, do you ever get headaches?
Speaker 2 (24:51):
What do you think?
Speaker 15 (24:53):
Well, here's a handy hent kind of fresh lime in
half and rub it on your forehead. Believe it or not,
it really works.
Speaker 6 (25:01):
A lime Yeah, make face full of lime juice running
down your eyes. You know I should feel good. I'll
make you forget all about the rest of your head hurt.
Always just use a little haired dog here. Oh, by
the way, we have a little party with the crew
(25:21):
after we wrap the show up. Here, you'll just stick around.
Speaker 15 (25:25):
Actually, I've got an early flight out. I should probably
go straight back to the hotel.
Speaker 6 (25:34):
Hey, you got any tips for cleaning up broken glass? Sorry? No,
well what good are you?
Speaker 10 (25:42):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Nothing?
Speaker 6 (25:44):
So anyway, I broke my glass. So anyways, I would
like to think of my special guest, Patrick Stewart, the
author one one Dalmasius. This is Rafer peace out.
Speaker 15 (26:08):
Oh good, Bob, hell Bob?
Speaker 4 (26:10):
Are you okay?
Speaker 8 (26:11):
Bob?
Speaker 13 (26:13):
Hey?
Speaker 4 (26:13):
Can we get a couple of you guys to put
them back on the couch over there?
Speaker 6 (26:19):
Cooking with Rayford is brought to you by a grant
from the Jack Daniels Distillery of Lynchburg, Tennessee, providing sour
mash whiskey to Raffords for over three quarters of a century.
Speaker 2 (26:30):
A right when we get back after the New Year,
where we celebrate with two more Cooking with Rayford shows.
How about that? Right now, let's play John Boy Jeopardy Review.
Yesterday's question we found out, according to Greek superstition, you
can end a recent run of bad luck by burning
these on Christmas Eve your shoes shoes? All right? Today's
(26:54):
John Boy, Jeffardy, Well you heard of these Christmas treats
your entire life. But not many people actually know what
they are. In the sixteen hundreds they were described as
candied seeds and nuts. By the eighteen hundreds there were
raisins coated in a hard candy shell. But most modern
recipes are just hard boiled nuggets of sugar.
Speaker 4 (27:17):
Is it nerds?
Speaker 2 (27:19):
No boxing nerds, no Christmas nerds? So thank you Christmas
one eight hundred Big shell you told free line. We
played John Boyd Jepard Next, Good Morning, This Big Show
(27:56):
the Radio Ring two you Wednesday, December twenty third. The
other day brought you by a Sterei laps Pharmaceutical great
C B D was zero T A C and made
in the USA. We got Rudolph the regular Reindeer. Make
it out, make a day to visit to the Big
Show dot com.
Speaker 4 (28:14):
Not everybody can be special.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
Right now, let's fly yes, live Acrossoric Heights.
Speaker 6 (28:28):
Now you're host reminding you there are only two shopping
my rumpus days till Christmas.
Speaker 2 (28:36):
He John Lord hang in. Let's say hey to Kenny
out of Brunswick, Georgia. Good morning, Kenny, Hey, what's going on? Hey?
Speaker 4 (28:47):
You are buddy?
Speaker 2 (28:47):
You first up? You ready? Oh my god, I'm ready?
All right, Jim, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (28:54):
I think you might need a few minutes.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
Let's review the question here for you. Kenny. You heard
of these Christmas treats your entire life. Not many people
actually know what they are. So in the sixteen hundreds
they were described as candied seeds and nuts. Well, eighteen
hundreds there were raisins coated in a hard candy shell.
The most modern recipes are just hard boiled nuggets of sugar.
Speaker 4 (29:18):
What are they?
Speaker 2 (29:19):
Kenny?
Speaker 13 (29:20):
It's the sugar plum.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
You s a sugar plums that dance in your head.
I'm headed to Dan sugar plum. Is that one of
them that does dance in your head with that poem?
Speaker 13 (29:39):
Yes?
Speaker 6 (29:39):
Yes, visions of sugarplums, Visions of sugar plums Christmas?
Speaker 2 (29:43):
All right?
Speaker 4 (29:44):
He exited.
Speaker 2 (29:47):
How to get the words right?
Speaker 13 (29:48):
Man?
Speaker 2 (29:49):
Hey, good work, Kenny. Your sugar plums got you a
big old mount Olive pickle prize pack. Headed down to Brunswick. Hey,
I'm on a playroll now bottom of the hour and Tomoo,
Tom of your news ride on the other side on
Tom Ken's who for this December to twenty third hein
(30:12):
old bull laugh. This is the award winning John Boy
(30:45):
and Billy Big Show, the South's number one export.
Speaker 13 (30:57):
Hey Biggest. This here Swisher reporting live from talk about
the sponsors my post twenty eight, four hundred and sixty two.
Today's report brought to you by Swisher Sweets the teeny
little cigar with a great, big cherry taste. That's right, Beggin.
I'm now Mungo Swisher. I just closed the deal yesterday
(31:18):
to sell the naming rights to myself for the next
four years. I'm calling in today from the quaint Sermo
Croatian village of Kalishnikov. As most of you folks know,
this is a troubled part of the world. In fact,
begging I was exploring a rough part of town last
night and got robbed at gunpoint. Lost six hundred dollars
that's one hundred bucks in cash and five hundred dollars
(31:40):
worth of on air mention. Thank goodness, I was able
to steady my nerves with a tall glass of yack
it off vodka. Remember if you can't shake it off,
jack it off. I'm pleased to have a special guest
with me today, His honor, the Mayor of Kalishnikov, mister
Boris Havlischev. By the way, today's interview is sponsored by
(32:01):
the tough new Dodge Ram the mayor of Truckville. Now,
mister hamlet Chev, let's give our worldwide listening audience a
feel for the situation here in Kalishnikov. Tell us about
the roveing bands of ethnic cleansing warlords still roving the
cobblestone streets of this picturesque little corner of the world.
And speaking of picturesque, don't trust your memories to just
(32:23):
Eddie film before you hit the road, do what we do.
Stock up now on plenty of eg for film products,
professional quality at discount prices. Mister Mayor, talk to us.
Speaker 16 (32:37):
Thank you well.
Speaker 13 (32:40):
Before I forget, let me mention that today's interview is
being brought to you over the amazing new Nokia thirty
one to fifty portable cellular satellite telephones, Nokia connecting people worldwide.
Speaker 16 (32:53):
Mister Mayor, thank you very much. Mister Swisha, Good morning,
John Boy and Beatie, and hello to all of your
listeners across America.
Speaker 13 (33:04):
Just one second and there's no federal radio to listen
to the big show on. That's the amazing new Bowse
Wave Radio. Great big sound and an amazingly small package.
And for the complete home entertainment experience, check out the
bows Wave Radio with CD player.
Speaker 16 (33:20):
Hold on, uh, yes, I forgot where I was? Where
was I?
Speaker 4 (33:26):
Let's see?
Speaker 13 (33:27):
Well, mister Mayor, you wouldn't have any trouble figuring out
where you are if you had the official portable GPS
system of the Talk about the Sponsor World Tour. The
Panasonic Model thirty one hundred features a Chris Clear five
in color LCD display that gets you zeroed in on
yourself within fifty yards, no matter where your adventures may
take you.
Speaker 16 (33:49):
Yes, thank you. That is a very nice unit day,
isn't it?
Speaker 13 (33:53):
And speaking a nice unit if you stake that, fans,
I'm looking for some excitement. Next time you're in the
Grand Strand area, South Carolin, be sure to stop in
at Tattle Tales two, home of Chesty McDonald, located just
a half mile north of Barefoot Landing on Highway seventeen
in North Myrtleby shop.
Speaker 16 (34:12):
Yes, do you really want to talk to me or not?
Speaker 13 (34:16):
I'd love to, mister Mayor, but unfortunately we're on a
time and speaking of time, thanks to our sponsor time X,
check out the newest member of the Timex Expedition collection,
the iron Man Triathlon speed and distance systems. Time X
takes a licking and keeps on a ticking and speaking
a licking. How many licks does it take to get
to the center of Asi pop the world may never know?
(34:39):
Stop up off Topsy Pomps now at our official outfitters,
the Massive General School locations in Boone Blowing Rock Valley
Crusis and coming soon to Candahar, Virginia right between Downhill
Candeheart Bike Rental and the Circle K Home of the
Bottomless Bucket of root beer and love is always to
my Mama Mabel, and hello to Ben Doo and film
(35:00):
A Cracken from Belfast, Northern Ireland. Listen to my talk
about the sponsor updates and streaming audio from my website
dot com tail Next time Mongo Swisher talking about myself Audios,
Alego love you.
Speaker 2 (35:15):
Biggen, Jaun Boy and Billy.
Speaker 17 (35:21):
By the way the beegs played, Jo, you're seeing how
much Elvis Wade Wold where the days?
Speaker 2 (35:34):
Good Morning Radio done right? Good morning and that's big
(36:02):
show on the radio, My last show before Christmas and
a brand new year for that matter. Good y'all being here.
This is Wednesday, December to twenty third. That's nice to
have a visit from our resident film critic to help
us find something to watch his holiday season. Let's welcome
Rabbi myron Berg Steam Showowy Hobies.
Speaker 4 (36:26):
What's happening? John Boyeme and Billy coyame?
Speaker 2 (36:30):
So, how the holidays treating you? I made the kluehnikah
y oy.
Speaker 4 (36:38):
Yeah, I still got a little bitt kickback from you.
Felt the fish honikah. Ain't days of presence five? No
real jew came up with that.
Speaker 18 (36:51):
I got kids, I got grandkids, grant grandkids, brothers, sisters, cousins.
Speaker 4 (36:56):
Everybody got their hands out eight days in a row.
What am I made the money? Who do you think
I am? Jeff Bozos?
Speaker 2 (37:05):
Well it leasas over now, Oh no, no, no no,
Then you.
Speaker 4 (37:09):
Gotta do Christmas. That's what happens when you let gen
piles marry into the family. That there's the food.
Speaker 19 (37:19):
Why yeah, I'm like the hinden Berg over here, all
that tish taking and lambation and piles and piles of Globalmarchican.
Speaker 18 (37:29):
Then it's sausage bowls, cocktail vienis and that damn jellow
salad and carrots and celery and nuts in it?
Speaker 4 (37:36):
What's that thing? The kids say, gross?
Speaker 2 (37:40):
Well, what did you wind up seen her?
Speaker 4 (37:43):
Doctors?
Speaker 2 (37:44):
What movie?
Speaker 7 (37:46):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (37:46):
I saw a bunch of stuff. I saw that movie
about hunting monsters. That's stunk. I've entered the red box.
Speaker 18 (37:54):
And got that movie Fat Man, about the kid who
puts a hit out on Sandy Clause.
Speaker 4 (37:58):
That's not too bad. It starts that guy from that
movie Brave fat what's his name? Who gives it? But
the one I really liked was this scary comedy called Freaky.
Have you heard about this?
Speaker 2 (38:15):
I've seen the previews.
Speaker 18 (38:16):
Well, honestly, this was not my first's choice. I mean,
a serial killer body switch movie. In't exactly got Festivus written.
Speaker 4 (38:23):
All over, but it's not bad.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
What's the story?
Speaker 18 (38:28):
Okay, there's this serial killer loose called the Butcher. He
targets an unpopular high school girl with an ancient christ
dagger that he stole. He stabs it in the shoulder
and she gets away. But in the morning they both
wake up to discover that in the other one's body,
and the clock is ticking because in twenty four hours
(38:48):
it becomes privateent. It's scary, it's funny. It's the whole
smear of cream, cheese and a cinematic bagel.
Speaker 4 (38:56):
Whatever the hell that mean?
Speaker 2 (38:58):
How's a cast?
Speaker 4 (39:00):
Well, I guess they're fine. I don't really know.
Speaker 2 (39:02):
How were they in the movie.
Speaker 4 (39:04):
Oh, everybody was good. And that lead guy is great.
Speaker 18 (39:08):
He's been in movies like Vending Smashes and Old Time School.
Speaker 4 (39:13):
He's that great actor.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
Vince Gill, Vince Vaughn, you're thinking of Vince Vaughn.
Speaker 4 (39:20):
I thought that was the guy from Muttley Crow.
Speaker 2 (39:23):
That's Vince Neil.
Speaker 4 (39:25):
I thought that was the basketball guy.
Speaker 2 (39:27):
That's Vince Carter.
Speaker 4 (39:29):
I thought that was the wrestling guy who's in love
with himself.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
That's Vince McMahon.
Speaker 4 (39:35):
I thought that was the football coach with the all
pro spitting gap in his teeth.
Speaker 2 (39:40):
That's Vince Lombardi.
Speaker 4 (39:43):
I thought that was the guy that Hillary didn't kill.
Speaker 2 (39:45):
That's Vince Foster.
Speaker 4 (39:49):
I thought that was the painter guy who cut his
ear off.
Speaker 2 (39:51):
That's Vincent van Go.
Speaker 4 (39:53):
I thought that was the old timey straight actor that
list like a sissy boy.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
That's Vincent Price.
Speaker 4 (40:01):
Well, who the hell am I thinking of?
Speaker 2 (40:03):
Vince Vaughn.
Speaker 4 (40:04):
Boy. He got fat Disney instead of sex, drugs, rock
and roll.
Speaker 18 (40:09):
It looks like fried tweakies, Snickers and jelly rolls.
Speaker 2 (40:13):
So what's a verdict?
Speaker 18 (40:15):
He should stop eating the punching, but he looks like
a Drink's coffee cake in a Crystal Gale Wig. The
movie verdict, well, in the nuts set, it's not too shabby.
Not for kids though, or smart adults, but not too shabby.
I give it four out of the five yarmickers, So
go do watch or don't. I don't care anymore. But
(40:38):
if you go see him at night, it's cheaper.
Speaker 4 (40:43):
Yo, morning, rednecks. This is your Pompertus of love.
Speaker 14 (40:48):
Ike Turner enjoying the hell out of my retirement, drinking liquors,
eating vinies, and when I get to Jones in for
a crack and a go with it, I tune in
the John Boy and on the Big Show. If why
I done lost my appetite for crackers?
Speaker 2 (41:40):
Good morning and Merry Christmas. It is our last show
before Christmas. Twenty and twenty Messy John Boone, Milly Christmas
Eveday Saturdays. Thanks I Man, RANDI is really stepped it up.
Twenty twenty made this a year to remember.
Speaker 5 (42:03):
That guffar at the end.
Speaker 4 (42:06):
I got that same five dude. This is like that
time he almost named me employee of the year.
Speaker 2 (42:13):
Man, I was talking earlier this morning, on this day,
like nineteen ninety seven, were the holiday episode of Seinfeld
Festivus episode, so it was festival day always on December
twenty third. Do you all remember the rules for that?
The festiv Us traditions derived from the episode of Final Seinfeld.
All right, adorn an aluminum festiv Us pole to be
(42:36):
displayed in the home.
Speaker 4 (42:37):
Got it?
Speaker 2 (42:38):
Now, I don't get this. It says in the O'Keefe
household there was no pole. Instead, a clock was placed
in a bag and nailed to the wall. One that
wasn't in that episode. That's the guy writing it.
Speaker 4 (42:52):
Okay, so yeah, that's the origin of it.
Speaker 2 (42:55):
Yeah, Oh that was a rider. Okay, all right? Oh O'Keefe.
Of course, why didn't we know that?
Speaker 4 (43:00):
I thought you do everything about that right there the credits.
Speaker 2 (43:03):
All right, So you're supposed to serve a traditional dinner
in the evening on the twenty third day. Now, during dinner,
allow the airing of grievances. Yes, indeed, each person takes
turns describing how the others have disappointed him or her
over the past.
Speaker 4 (43:21):
Ye, now you're gonna hear about it. Tells me your
place sucks.
Speaker 2 (43:31):
We better make George's boss was there.
Speaker 1 (43:34):
Better make sure it's a seven course dinner because it's
gonna take a while.
Speaker 2 (43:38):
So then feats of strength follows dinner and involves wrestling
the head of the household. So note the holiday is
not complete unless the head of the household is pinned.
So failure to pin the head of the household could
result in perpetual Festivus. To know that little tabby to
(44:00):
the room. And then finally, a Festivus miracle is a frequent,
if unimpressive miracle. You may count carrying all the groceries
into the house for dinner without tripping or dropping one
of the bags as a Festivus miracle.
Speaker 4 (44:16):
You remember what the Festivus miracle was? That the guys
from the betting parlor tracty lane down to the house.
Speaker 2 (44:23):
That is, I think so.
Speaker 4 (44:26):
A happy festive Us.
Speaker 2 (44:30):
Ain't got much to do. I should take them some
time today for you.
Speaker 4 (44:33):
I'm not I gotta wrestle this guy.
Speaker 2 (44:38):
Good morning, Big shows on the radio, coming up the
easiest way for you to win this morning, that'd be
the current events quiz take See get a liquid performance
automotive cleaning and detailing kid. They could performance the world's
highest quality full synthetic gasoline and diesel fuel additives. You
go to Big Show dot Com, click on the liquid
Performance banner. You get twenty percent off all appear arance,
(45:00):
maintenance and performance products. When you intercode jb B at
checkout hang on, you win you some in minutes. The
first year a Big Show classic many many years ago.
I think it's way back forward. Syndicated wasn't boys. It's
called a Christmas Goober, London, eighteen ninety seven.
Speaker 12 (45:30):
Our drive city filled with grimy, smoke filled sweatshops, sweaty,
grime filed smoke shops, smokey, sweat filled while you get
the idea, this is not club med we're talking about.
It's dark, it's depressing, and no place is more dark
and depressing than the Mega Little Shop of Goob and
Molly run by Ebenezer Goob. As our story opens, Ebenezer
(45:51):
is talking with his chief Lucky Robert Dave Ratchett.
Speaker 20 (45:55):
Mister Goob, you're a cruel, heartless slave driver. With no
sense of kindness or understand Guess that's why I've always
looked up to you. Be that as it may, I'm
deeply saddened by the way you have refused to close
the office on Christmas Day.
Speaker 12 (46:08):
Christmas, that's just another excuse to pick a bad's pocket
if you ask me close the office, Oh Christmas, the hubbug,
get back to work here. Ratchet, by the way, stop
hanging all those Thou shalt not.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
Smoke sides around the office.
Speaker 12 (46:23):
Goodness, say yes, abenez Agobe isn't exactly a candidate for
the Jefferson Awards, if you know what I mean. Later
that night, Abenezer is at home getting ready for bed
when he hears a strange sound. Bayn, what did the
A ghostly apparition appears before him.
Speaker 21 (46:45):
He Whatsubman, I'm the gorsed of Bob Marley.
Speaker 2 (46:50):
Hey, wait a bit it My dead partner was Jacob Barley.
Speaker 21 (46:53):
I know, but the writers thought this would be a
better joke, man, and they figured we could use one.
Speaker 2 (46:59):
Right about now.
Speaker 21 (47:00):
Anyway, I'm here to tell you, before the night is over,
you'll be visited by three spirits. They'll show you how
you're squandering your existence on the art man, and if
we're going to keep this thing under five minutes, they
better show up pretty soon.
Speaker 12 (47:15):
Mom, ghost of Bob Barley, And I thought I had
some stupid material. The hubbud Abeneza falls back into a
troubled sleep, but it's awakened leg of that same night
by another ghost sleep figure, Are you the ghost of
Christmas past?
Speaker 2 (47:35):
All my life for a fight about it?
Speaker 12 (47:39):
I come to talk to youans about how you've handled.
Speaker 4 (47:42):
Your life in the past.
Speaker 2 (47:45):
How if I did not?
Speaker 12 (47:52):
Suddenly a second spirit of Pairs. Hello, Abeneze a Goma,
that's Ebenezer Goober.
Speaker 2 (47:59):
You must be the ghost of Christmas Present.
Speaker 13 (48:02):
Right you?
Speaker 4 (48:02):
Our baby?
Speaker 12 (48:03):
Hey, I just came back to tell you, if you
don't stop being such a pill, you'll have a ghost
of a chance of getting a Christmas present. Ha ha,
Hold on, baby, big a butt head on another dimensional plane.
See you tell Cindy Patterson. I'll get right back to her. Yeah, babe,
at that moment, our third ghost of.
Speaker 2 (48:20):
Pairs, Yoh, what's up?
Speaker 12 (48:22):
I guess you must be the ghost of Christmas Future.
I reckon, Hey, let me tell my paperwork here? Huh, yeah,
that's you.
Speaker 6 (48:30):
Yeah, I'm here to show you how you're gonna be
a butt head for the rest of your life, and
then when you die, nobody gonna come to your funeral
and stuff.
Speaker 2 (48:36):
Listen.
Speaker 6 (48:37):
I love to develop the concept a little more, but
this thing is really a little bit long.
Speaker 2 (48:40):
Listen jump to page seven. When you break down and
start liking Christmas and stuff, can.
Speaker 4 (48:43):
We do well?
Speaker 2 (48:44):
Harford, put a little bore into it, sud for.
Speaker 12 (48:47):
When I'm getting paid, I'm the one ought to be
saying dull humbug all right, all right, hey Robin. Top
of page Seford, quick the heart wrenching scenes. Roveo te
everbody's a goal one. This Christmas Eve change has outright forever.
In a single dramatic night, he goes from full time
butt head to bleeding heart sentimentalist. And so the next day, Hey,
(49:10):
Robert d Ratchet, tiny taim Bye bed, Bye bed.
Speaker 2 (49:14):
What's happy?
Speaker 21 (49:14):
Dudes?
Speaker 2 (49:15):
Why mister goob, you've changed? What's happening to you?
Speaker 12 (49:19):
I'm full of the joy of Christmas, good buddy, the
joy of Christmas.
Speaker 7 (49:23):
You. That's right.
Speaker 2 (49:25):
Put up to office supplies.
Speaker 8 (49:26):
Boys.
Speaker 12 (49:27):
We gonna have us a Christmas throw down, ain't they right?
Speaker 7 (49:30):
Over?
Speaker 4 (49:30):
Every days ago? Where yo, mister Gooble, this is a
pleasant surprise.
Speaker 20 (49:34):
You the meanest curmudgeon of the nineteenth century, full of
the love and joy of the holiday season. I'm impressed.
Say about that, no smoking lounge in the basement.
Speaker 12 (49:45):
Don't push you, Luck Ratchet. From that day forward, Ebenezer
goob was a new mine. Hey, you know what you
get when you cross Robert D. Ratchet with a pig bathing.
There's some things even a pig won't do.
Speaker 7 (49:59):
Duha.
Speaker 12 (50:00):
Now, if we can only get him some new jokes,
I'm Robin Leach with agnog wishers and candy cane dreams
for you and yours this holiday season.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
Or as Tony tim would say, no, no, no, not
that thing.
Speaker 6 (50:15):
Oh God bless us everyone.
Speaker 2 (50:17):
That's better.
Speaker 10 (50:19):
Happy holidays, Our memories shaved in the bowels of my mind.
Speaker 2 (50:38):
Whatever that word? Yeah, all right, y'all, let's play the
current events quiz Bentley, what are we dealing with?
Speaker 5 (50:47):
Some helpful hints on how to keep you happy in
your romantic relationship?
Speaker 2 (50:51):
Ride one eight hundred Big show you told free line
Take seeing with were playing a
Hello, big Chow fans. The holidays are coming quick, aren't they.
I picked a good Encore show for you today. This
one took place in one of those rare situations where
we actually worked live right before Christmas. It originally aired
on Wednesday, December twenty third, twenty twenty.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
It should be chock full of Christmasy stuff. Enjoy the show.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
Doggy backing up to my nurse, she's going, I answered him, Well,
there is.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Wednesday, December twenty third. All day yesterday I was called today,
thank you. I was calling today Christmas Eve, and uh, yeah,
well it is our Christmas Eve because this is our
last day before Christmas. So I'm sorry about that. Any confusion.
Speaker 4 (00:57):
There you go. I think that was the rough cut.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
Okay, so are we talking about the day's December twenty third, Yes,
our last show before Christmas? All right, So it is
today is the day before Christmas Eve? Yes, yes, but
yesterday that's not Yeah. I was saying that all day yesterday.
Speaker 4 (01:20):
I thought, wow, he's got control of the calendar.
Speaker 5 (01:23):
It's a Festivus miracle.
Speaker 4 (01:26):
But no.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
What's funny is that there's five people in the room
and nobody else just caught it until that proves it.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
I think you sometimes y'all don't listen to me.
Speaker 4 (01:35):
Until I listened to the podcast, I didn't catch it.
Speaker 5 (01:38):
Between that and everybody having COVID brain, nobody.
Speaker 6 (01:40):
Knows what it is.
Speaker 4 (01:42):
I'm sure.
Speaker 2 (01:42):
What'd you say, Billy? We are sure? It's Wednesday, December
twenty third, all right, all right, and it is fest
of Us to day. I got a lot of problems
with you, feeble, You're good. He's here. In December twenty third,
Fest of Us commemorates a holiday episode of the television
comedy Seinfeld, aired in nineteen ninety seven. How about that, Oh,
(02:07):
I did well festivals.
Speaker 5 (02:11):
I don't think we'll make it to the feats of stream.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
We got our three days in this we saved up.
Pull out our first prize pack. Get you ready for Alpbers.
That's the first on the agenda. On this day before
Christmas Eve, Big shows on the radio, Good morning, Big
shows on a radio. First prize pack were playing for
today a Happy Herd prize pick. You know, Happy Herd
makes the highest quality of tractors, minerals and feed for deer,
(02:41):
bear and hogs in the hunting industry. As we as
parts of the country we head toward the end of
deer season. I think ours goes out like January first.
So then of course down south and Alabama, Mississippi boys
got it going on, and some spots of Rudd ain't
even made it down there yet. You ready heldebig show
(03:01):
dot Com. Click on the Happy Herd link interco JBB
twenty twenty at check out, get ten percent off. Look,
get you set up to win you some right here.
Three dates in history where we get our categores. December
twenty third, nineteen seventy two, the world record for consecutive
push ups was set by Richard Knight. He did twenty
(03:23):
five thousand, two hundred and twenty two on a hard surface.
Took him eleven hours and fourteen minutes to accomplish the task. Richard,
by the way, was eight years old at the time.
Speaker 5 (03:35):
Oh well, please, it was easy for you.
Speaker 2 (03:37):
You didn't have all that wait to push up, did it?
Speaker 5 (03:39):
He didn't have as far to go?
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Yeah? Nineteen seventy two, All right, move up to six.
Arnold Schwarzenegger broke his leg while skiing with his family
in Sun Valley, idahot me to the chapel. It was California, governor.
Then it was taken to a local hospital for X
rays revealed he had fractured his femur. Is not a fema,
(04:05):
an Austrian Schwarzenegger is an experienced skier. Well. Three days
later in Santa Monica, he underwent surgery to repair the
break and finally was On this date, No. Nine, a
man who triggered a major alert by falsely claiming that
his son was adrift in a helium balloon was sentenced
to ninety days in jail and his wife to twenty.
(04:29):
So you'll remember this. Richard Heene and his wife ma'am
said in October that their son had been carried off
by the balloon, but the war was eventually found hiding
at home. He apologized the rescue workers and the community
in the Colorado courtroom. The judge ordered four years of
supervised probation for the couple and banned them from receiving
(04:50):
any form of financial benefit from the case.
Speaker 5 (04:53):
They left break his femur.
Speaker 4 (04:56):
I never understood what their motive was. Why would you
do that just to be on TV? How mad you've
got to be on TV?
Speaker 2 (05:04):
I no, no, but I was some of the th
there's nobody in America.
Speaker 5 (05:07):
That's weird about trying to get on TV.
Speaker 7 (05:09):
You know this.
Speaker 4 (05:10):
I mean, how do you get a payday out of that?
Speaker 2 (05:13):
I don't know. The George took care of that if
they could figure out a way. Yeah, well, good news.
Speaker 5 (05:17):
You're gonna be on Cops.
Speaker 2 (05:18):
That's about it, alright. But there's our categories one eight
hundred big shows you tore free line, toll free line.
Also we play out birds next, Good morning, Big Shows
(05:59):
all ready to go to you. Wednesday, December twenty third
video of the day, brought you by asked Scara Labs
Rudolph the regular Reindeer. Check it out to get the
chants at the Big Show dot com? Are your Christmas fun?
And right now get out winning.
Speaker 7 (06:18):
Look at.
Speaker 4 (06:21):
Upburst. Let's play Upburst. It's the game that anyone can win.
John Boy and Bully to give.
Speaker 5 (06:29):
The prizes from the Big Prize Beer.
Speaker 2 (06:33):
Let's go contested number one. This should really be a
lot of fun.
Speaker 4 (06:39):
Win you're playing Upburst. Have a hurry up and guest
time you love the best time.
Speaker 6 (06:45):
You love a big shots.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
Let's say had of James from Saulsbury, North Carolina. We
have a shot. Good morning, James.
Speaker 8 (07:04):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
How's it going? Hey, anything gone?
Speaker 9 (07:07):
Good?
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Glad you made it in here. Buddy, you've been up
long enough to hear the three days in history. Let's
get through the categories. You ready to go, Yes, sir,
we'll go. Then in five seconds, three exercises, ready go, push.
Speaker 7 (07:24):
Up, up and pull up ma'am.
Speaker 2 (07:28):
All right now we need three famous skiing spots ready go.
Speaker 10 (07:36):
As uh.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
And for the wind, three places to hide in your house.
Ready to go. Let's call it under in the all around.
Speaker 5 (07:54):
I bet it didn't get away and it be really good.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
Good work. Have your prize back headed over to saws
wearing for you.
Speaker 7 (08:03):
Got it?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
I appreciate you? All right, body man Christmas hang on
with jacket Christmas bottom of the hour and tell me
to tell of your news Christmas tune from Hoarding the boys.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
I saw Dembard.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
Beat up Santa Claus, no up. Good morning, Big shows
(09:00):
on the radio the day before Christmas Eve. You heard
me yesterday saying yesterday was a day before Christmas Eve.
Sorry for the concase.
Speaker 4 (09:09):
You know how he do well?
Speaker 2 (09:11):
Then if you want to get technically, it was a day.
It was a day, four day, he goes. This is
our last show before Christmas since we're awful Christmas Eve
and Christmas Day this year. Okay, so it's all working out.
Let's celebrate went a Christmas dude from hoyting a junior
Nation band. I don't get chuck squat for Christmas. All
(09:41):
my friends that broke ca ast me.
Speaker 11 (09:44):
I'll never find a present Sunday to Christmas Tree.
Speaker 2 (09:50):
I got nowhere to have a stocking. I't got no
fire's place. All this galluts up to me looked like
us through rent from matter space. Christmas show can be.
I could use a nice cold but show cut.
Speaker 8 (10:10):
Use some cheer.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
For Christmass me. I don't get much Christmas.
Speaker 11 (10:24):
Section, got no girlfriend by my side. It's hard to
get promatic living in the same.
Speaker 8 (10:34):
White My roommate Delbert.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
He's a handful of biggess gool. You ever seen his
girlfriend gave him COVID.
Speaker 11 (10:44):
We all had two quarantines. Were in hot to the irs,
A real bad case of ibs.
Speaker 8 (10:54):
Writ my whole day.
Speaker 2 (10:58):
For Christmas fIF fee.
Speaker 11 (11:07):
The body shot by run is going down the tunes.
It's been months and months since I last seen some food.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
Since not a lot of start mistaking.
Speaker 4 (11:23):
I've done a lot from breaking.
Speaker 11 (11:26):
I've stop in the mud, so sad break somethun.
Speaker 2 (11:32):
I don't ask for much this Christmas. Sayda do what
you can do.
Speaker 11 (11:39):
Drop me off a nice coat, twelve pack. That is
all asking.
Speaker 4 (11:44):
You have me.
Speaker 12 (11:46):
Beat this Christmas bunk well, im good.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
On Christmas drunk, make my whole.
Speaker 11 (11:55):
All at for Christmas.
Speaker 7 (12:00):
He's be.
Speaker 11 (12:04):
Hold on for Christmas.
Speaker 8 (12:07):
Sis be.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
Ho for Christmas.
Speaker 13 (12:13):
Sis be.
Speaker 2 (12:17):
Holla for Christmas. Sis be and hazard us say good
(12:58):
morning it is it makes you want to radio rulling
do your December third. Let's get this call coming on
in front of the road. Good morning, big show.
Speaker 8 (13:10):
Well, good morning there, John Boy and Billy, and good
morning to all are beloved friends, other and radio land.
This airs a Reverend Billy Ray Collins from the Sword
of Joshua, Independent Folk. I spoke Pennycoastal Assembly just off
State Road twenty three on the Frontage Road. Oh friends,
it's Christmas season, the time of year we're all spending
(13:32):
a bunch of money. We ain't got to buy a
bunch of people. We don't like a bunch of presents.
They don't want all to honor a tiny little baby
born in the manger. So all the world could come
together for a December to remember over at the Lexus plate. Oh, preacher,
(13:53):
you sound like you in a bad mood. We know
you ain't real hot on Christmas time, but you ain't
gonna come in here and try to ruin it for everybody. Well,
let me just say this about that. The way the
past few months has gone, it's a tad late to
worry about something getting runch And the way I look
at it, Christmas ain't supposed to be for everybody anyway.
(14:16):
Used to be for Christians to celebrate the birth of
our Lord and Savior. Oh but nowadays the only time
Jesus Christ comes out of most folks mouth is when
the car in front of them don't pull off when
the light turns grain. And I'll tell you another thing,
This modernistic soul called Christmas music ain't helping my mood.
None needed. Nowadays, every wooie booger with a record deal
(14:40):
comes out with a Christmas album, whether they need to
or not. They don't show a liqu of interest into
Lord Jesus the rest of the year. Oh but come
December they all want to be the next being.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
Cost me.
Speaker 8 (14:52):
Well, honey, if I want to hear what Lady God
Josh sounds like singing jangle bells. I'll chuck the cat
in the woodship and the next time Lowe's makes me
listen to old unsaved, hell bound Stevie Nicks sing Silent Night,
I'm taking my business over to the homey. Sorry about that.
(15:13):
Normally I swallowed my reservations and really embraced the whole
church Christmas celebration deal. But it ain't been easy this year.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
Friends.
Speaker 8 (15:23):
This year rent right down to comode most of our
members as old white folks heat up with underlying conditions.
We had to cancel the candlelight service, and then the
Christmas Singalong got scrubbed because the church choir turned out
to be a bunch of virus shed and slab gun
and the Pets and Things store went out of business,
(15:43):
so there wasn't no animals to rent for the live
Nativity in the church parking lots. In other words, our
whole holiday action plan this year turned out to be
what the gimph that Stole Christmas used to call stink stink. Although,
if old doctor Grauchi is right, this new vaccine is
(16:07):
gonna start knocking the covert nineteen out over the next
few months and may I just say I hope he's right,
because if I had to figure out this computer church
stuff much longer, I'm gonna go slap out of my mind.
Like to close on a positive note, if I may,
y'all can still surf on over to our face Tube
(16:29):
page for the Sword of Joshua Sermon of the Month
this month. It's entitled Grandma about got runned over by
the Devil's reindeer, but Jesus reached over and yanked her
out of the fire at the last minute. All the
best of you and yours from your Bible beaten buddies
here at the Sword of Joshua, Independent Full of Gospel,
(16:50):
Pennycostal Assembly, just off State Road twenty three. All the room,
but don't come out and see us because we're closed
a blip. Here's a Reverend Billy Ray Collins reminding you
it's time to turn so you don't burn Yon Boy
and Billy Happy Honda days.
Speaker 4 (17:13):
What go now?
Speaker 10 (17:15):
Go now?
Speaker 4 (17:16):
Okay, Good morning, Stan Higgins.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
Here.
Speaker 14 (17:20):
Nothing makes my day like a chance to pipe in
on John Boy and Billy here in the big show.
Speaker 4 (17:25):
But I don't come here just to see them. I'm
not a gay.
Speaker 14 (17:29):
I come here for the eye, Candy Bab's Jackie and Theater,
and Fanny's got a sweet too.
Speaker 4 (17:35):
How is that.
Speaker 2 (18:09):
Good morning? It's a big sew on the radio coming
out ten minutes. Yeah, we hear you, request y'all the
classic Christmas Cooking with Rayper. We'll play us in John
Boyd Jeopardy here in a few minutes. But first a
sound of the season, yues which season?
Speaker 9 (18:42):
I came apon a road to kill you, A sorrowful
sight to be. He lay upon the high raising his
body was stiff and cold.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
I bad.
Speaker 9 (19:09):
He never saw the car careening through the snow.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
The light shone brodly.
Speaker 4 (19:25):
His eyes, and then they laid him low.
Speaker 2 (19:36):
I came a mo road, killed him and lifted him
for will joy snuffys of bad be sloppy Joe B.
Speaker 11 (20:02):
Castro There rely get stuck in your team?
Speaker 7 (20:14):
Will please?
Speaker 5 (20:16):
The blue sprung this head upon.
Speaker 7 (20:23):
Our county side site to.
Speaker 5 (20:45):
Aca is old to bring chu as the the.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Good morning big shows on a radio coming up. We
played John Boyd Jefreardy. You can win a mount Olive
pickle prize, Pug. Spending time with family and friends has
never been more important. For nearly one hundred years, mount
Olive Pickle Company has been part of holiday traditions and
our customers of the reason we are committed to excellence.
Thank you for the mount Olive Pickle Company family. Hang on,
(21:48):
we'll play in minutes versa holiday classic.
Speaker 6 (21:52):
It's time once again for Cooking with Rafer with your
host Robert d Rafer.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
No, no, no where in abu five minutes. Just stare up.
Speaker 6 (22:01):
Hey, all, that's rave. On today's show, we'd like to
welcome a very special guest. Where's that card?
Speaker 8 (22:08):
Oh? You here?
Speaker 6 (22:09):
This entertainment guru Martha Stewart is America's best known expert
on home entertainment, but her sister is an expert in
her own right, and her new book is called one
hundred and one Free and Nearly Free Household Hints. Please
welcome my special guest, Marcy Stewart.
Speaker 15 (22:27):
Well, thank you, Bob. It's a pleasure to be here.
Speaker 6 (22:30):
No problem. You want something to drink?
Speaker 15 (22:33):
You have any dry white wines?
Speaker 6 (22:35):
I look like I have any dry white wines. How
about a shout a gentleman jack, No thanks, I'm having
me a taste.
Speaker 15 (22:45):
My goodness, that's an awfully big taste.
Speaker 6 (22:48):
I'm a big boy, so Anyways, what's this new book
of yours about.
Speaker 15 (22:53):
Well, Bob, My famous sister Martha sometimes gets accused of
being a little elaborate in some of her household jack
I meanwhile, with always the more practical one in the family.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
You've a little bit better looking as years.
Speaker 11 (23:08):
Thanks.
Speaker 15 (23:09):
Anyway, this book is a collection of some of my
favorite handy household tips that'll cost you practically nothing.
Speaker 6 (23:16):
Speaking of free, you're sure you don't want some of this?
Speaker 4 (23:19):
No, no thanks?
Speaker 6 (23:20):
Suit yourself just means more for me. So did I
ask you about the book?
Speaker 7 (23:31):
Yes?
Speaker 13 (23:31):
You did?
Speaker 6 (23:32):
Oh yeah, household hen so lay sime on us.
Speaker 15 (23:36):
Well, I'd be happy to now. We all love golden
brown pancakes at breakfast time, and if you use a
turkey baster to squeeze the batter onto the hot griddle,
you'll have perfectly shaped pancakes every time.
Speaker 6 (23:48):
How about the frozen ones you put in the microwave.
The hardest part of that is you get them out
of plastic bag.
Speaker 15 (23:54):
What's next, Well, if you're having a hard boiled egg
with that breakfast, an easy way to that your eggshells
from cracking is to add a pinch of salt to
the water before boiling.
Speaker 6 (24:05):
What difference does it make if they cracked and you're
gonna take the shells off anyway?
Speaker 2 (24:09):
Come on, what else you got?
Speaker 15 (24:11):
Well, as long as we're boiling water on the stove.
Now here's a tip for perfect corn on the cop
We can add a pinch of sugar to the water
while cooking sugar huh, and it helps bring out the
corn's natural sweetness.
Speaker 6 (24:27):
On the kind of corn iBOT comes in a can. Well,
speaking of corn, let's just get a little bit here, Bob.
Speaker 15 (24:37):
You might want to take it. Take a little easy there.
Speaker 6 (24:41):
Don't you worry about me, sweet hunt, I was knocking
these back when you was still in diapers. Press on,
press on?
Speaker 15 (24:47):
Okay, do you ever get headaches?
Speaker 2 (24:51):
What do you think?
Speaker 15 (24:53):
Well, here's a handy hent kind of fresh lime in
half and rub it on your forehead. Believe it or not,
it really works.
Speaker 6 (25:01):
A lime Yeah, make face full of lime juice running
down your eyes. You know I should feel good. I'll
make you forget all about the rest of your head hurt.
Always just use a little haired dog here. Oh, by
the way, we have a little party with the crew
(25:21):
after we wrap the show up. Here, you'll just stick around.
Speaker 15 (25:25):
Actually, I've got an early flight out. I should probably
go straight back to the hotel.
Speaker 6 (25:34):
Hey, you got any tips for cleaning up broken glass? Sorry? No,
well what good are you?
Speaker 10 (25:42):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Nothing?
Speaker 6 (25:44):
So anyway, I broke my glass. So anyways, I would
like to think of my special guest, Patrick Stewart, the
author one one Dalmasius. This is Rafer peace out.
Speaker 15 (26:08):
Oh good, Bob, hell Bob?
Speaker 4 (26:10):
Are you okay?
Speaker 8 (26:11):
Bob?
Speaker 13 (26:13):
Hey?
Speaker 4 (26:13):
Can we get a couple of you guys to put
them back on the couch over there?
Speaker 6 (26:19):
Cooking with Rayford is brought to you by a grant
from the Jack Daniels Distillery of Lynchburg, Tennessee, providing sour
mash whiskey to Raffords for over three quarters of a century.
Speaker 2 (26:30):
A right when we get back after the New Year,
where we celebrate with two more Cooking with Rayford shows.
How about that? Right now, let's play John Boy Jeopardy Review.
Yesterday's question we found out, according to Greek superstition, you
can end a recent run of bad luck by burning
these on Christmas Eve your shoes shoes? All right? Today's
(26:54):
John Boy, Jeffardy, Well you heard of these Christmas treats
your entire life. But not many people actually know what
they are. In the sixteen hundreds they were described as
candied seeds and nuts. By the eighteen hundreds there were
raisins coated in a hard candy shell. But most modern
recipes are just hard boiled nuggets of sugar.
Speaker 4 (27:17):
Is it nerds?
Speaker 2 (27:19):
No boxing nerds, no Christmas nerds? So thank you Christmas
one eight hundred Big shell you told free line. We
played John Boyd Jepard Next, Good Morning, This Big Show
(27:56):
the Radio Ring two you Wednesday, December twenty third. The
other day brought you by a Sterei laps Pharmaceutical great
C B D was zero T A C and made
in the USA. We got Rudolph the regular Reindeer. Make
it out, make a day to visit to the Big
Show dot com.
Speaker 4 (28:14):
Not everybody can be special.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
Right now, let's fly yes, live Acrossoric Heights.
Speaker 6 (28:28):
Now you're host reminding you there are only two shopping
my rumpus days till Christmas.
Speaker 2 (28:36):
He John Lord hang in. Let's say hey to Kenny
out of Brunswick, Georgia. Good morning, Kenny, Hey, what's going on? Hey?
Speaker 4 (28:47):
You are buddy?
Speaker 2 (28:47):
You first up? You ready? Oh my god, I'm ready?
All right, Jim, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (28:54):
I think you might need a few minutes.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
Let's review the question here for you. Kenny. You heard
of these Christmas treats your entire life. Not many people
actually know what they are. So in the sixteen hundreds
they were described as candied seeds and nuts. Well, eighteen
hundreds there were raisins coated in a hard candy shell.
The most modern recipes are just hard boiled nuggets of sugar.
Speaker 4 (29:18):
What are they?
Speaker 2 (29:19):
Kenny?
Speaker 13 (29:20):
It's the sugar plum.
Speaker 2 (29:23):
You s a sugar plums that dance in your head.
I'm headed to Dan sugar plum. Is that one of
them that does dance in your head with that poem?
Speaker 13 (29:39):
Yes?
Speaker 6 (29:39):
Yes, visions of sugarplums, Visions of sugar plums Christmas?
Speaker 2 (29:43):
All right?
Speaker 4 (29:44):
He exited.
Speaker 2 (29:47):
How to get the words right?
Speaker 13 (29:48):
Man?
Speaker 2 (29:49):
Hey, good work, Kenny. Your sugar plums got you a
big old mount Olive pickle prize pack. Headed down to Brunswick. Hey,
I'm on a playroll now bottom of the hour and Tomoo,
Tom of your news ride on the other side on
Tom Ken's who for this December to twenty third hein
(30:12):
old bull laugh. This is the award winning John Boy
(30:45):
and Billy Big Show, the South's number one export.
Speaker 13 (30:57):
Hey Biggest. This here Swisher reporting live from talk about
the sponsors my post twenty eight, four hundred and sixty two.
Today's report brought to you by Swisher Sweets the teeny
little cigar with a great, big cherry taste. That's right, Beggin.
I'm now Mungo Swisher. I just closed the deal yesterday
(31:18):
to sell the naming rights to myself for the next
four years. I'm calling in today from the quaint Sermo
Croatian village of Kalishnikov. As most of you folks know,
this is a troubled part of the world. In fact,
begging I was exploring a rough part of town last
night and got robbed at gunpoint. Lost six hundred dollars
that's one hundred bucks in cash and five hundred dollars
(31:40):
worth of on air mention. Thank goodness, I was able
to steady my nerves with a tall glass of yack
it off vodka. Remember if you can't shake it off,
jack it off. I'm pleased to have a special guest
with me today, His honor, the Mayor of Kalishnikov, mister
Boris Havlischev. By the way, today's interview is sponsored by
(32:01):
the tough new Dodge Ram the mayor of Truckville. Now,
mister hamlet Chev, let's give our worldwide listening audience a
feel for the situation here in Kalishnikov. Tell us about
the roveing bands of ethnic cleansing warlords still roving the
cobblestone streets of this picturesque little corner of the world.
And speaking of picturesque, don't trust your memories to just
(32:23):
Eddie film before you hit the road, do what we do.
Stock up now on plenty of eg for film products,
professional quality at discount prices. Mister Mayor, talk to us.
Speaker 16 (32:37):
Thank you well.
Speaker 13 (32:40):
Before I forget, let me mention that today's interview is
being brought to you over the amazing new Nokia thirty
one to fifty portable cellular satellite telephones, Nokia connecting people worldwide.
Speaker 16 (32:53):
Mister Mayor, thank you very much. Mister Swisha, Good morning,
John Boy and Beatie, and hello to all of your
listeners across America.
Speaker 13 (33:04):
Just one second and there's no federal radio to listen
to the big show on. That's the amazing new Bowse
Wave Radio. Great big sound and an amazingly small package.
And for the complete home entertainment experience, check out the
bows Wave Radio with CD player.
Speaker 16 (33:20):
Hold on, uh, yes, I forgot where I was? Where
was I?
Speaker 4 (33:26):
Let's see?
Speaker 13 (33:27):
Well, mister Mayor, you wouldn't have any trouble figuring out
where you are if you had the official portable GPS
system of the Talk about the Sponsor World Tour. The
Panasonic Model thirty one hundred features a Chris Clear five
in color LCD display that gets you zeroed in on
yourself within fifty yards, no matter where your adventures may
take you.
Speaker 16 (33:49):
Yes, thank you. That is a very nice unit day,
isn't it?
Speaker 13 (33:53):
And speaking a nice unit if you stake that, fans,
I'm looking for some excitement. Next time you're in the
Grand Strand area, South Carolin, be sure to stop in
at Tattle Tales two, home of Chesty McDonald, located just
a half mile north of Barefoot Landing on Highway seventeen
in North Myrtleby shop.
Speaker 16 (34:12):
Yes, do you really want to talk to me or not?
Speaker 13 (34:16):
I'd love to, mister Mayor, but unfortunately we're on a
time and speaking of time, thanks to our sponsor time X,
check out the newest member of the Timex Expedition collection,
the iron Man Triathlon speed and distance systems. Time X
takes a licking and keeps on a ticking and speaking
a licking. How many licks does it take to get
to the center of Asi pop the world may never know?
(34:39):
Stop up off Topsy Pomps now at our official outfitters,
the Massive General School locations in Boone Blowing Rock Valley
Crusis and coming soon to Candahar, Virginia right between Downhill
Candeheart Bike Rental and the Circle K Home of the
Bottomless Bucket of root beer and love is always to
my Mama Mabel, and hello to Ben Doo and film
(35:00):
A Cracken from Belfast, Northern Ireland. Listen to my talk
about the sponsor updates and streaming audio from my website
dot com tail Next time Mongo Swisher talking about myself Audios,
Alego love you.
Speaker 2 (35:15):
Biggen, Jaun Boy and Billy.
Speaker 17 (35:21):
By the way the beegs played, Jo, you're seeing how
much Elvis Wade Wold where the days?
Speaker 2 (35:34):
Good Morning Radio done right? Good morning and that's big
(36:02):
show on the radio, My last show before Christmas and
a brand new year for that matter. Good y'all being here.
This is Wednesday, December to twenty third. That's nice to
have a visit from our resident film critic to help
us find something to watch his holiday season. Let's welcome
Rabbi myron Berg Steam Showowy Hobies.
Speaker 4 (36:26):
What's happening? John Boyeme and Billy coyame?
Speaker 2 (36:30):
So, how the holidays treating you? I made the kluehnikah
y oy.
Speaker 4 (36:38):
Yeah, I still got a little bitt kickback from you.
Felt the fish honikah. Ain't days of presence five? No
real jew came up with that.
Speaker 18 (36:51):
I got kids, I got grandkids, grant grandkids, brothers, sisters, cousins.
Speaker 4 (36:56):
Everybody got their hands out eight days in a row.
What am I made the money? Who do you think
I am? Jeff Bozos?
Speaker 2 (37:05):
Well it leasas over now, Oh no, no, no no,
Then you.
Speaker 4 (37:09):
Gotta do Christmas. That's what happens when you let gen
piles marry into the family. That there's the food.
Speaker 19 (37:19):
Why yeah, I'm like the hinden Berg over here, all
that tish taking and lambation and piles and piles of Globalmarchican.
Speaker 18 (37:29):
Then it's sausage bowls, cocktail vienis and that damn jellow
salad and carrots and celery and nuts in it?
Speaker 4 (37:36):
What's that thing? The kids say, gross?
Speaker 2 (37:40):
Well, what did you wind up seen her?
Speaker 4 (37:43):
Doctors?
Speaker 2 (37:44):
What movie?
Speaker 7 (37:46):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (37:46):
I saw a bunch of stuff. I saw that movie
about hunting monsters. That's stunk. I've entered the red box.
Speaker 18 (37:54):
And got that movie Fat Man, about the kid who
puts a hit out on Sandy Clause.
Speaker 4 (37:58):
That's not too bad. It starts that guy from that
movie Brave fat what's his name? Who gives it? But
the one I really liked was this scary comedy called Freaky.
Have you heard about this?
Speaker 2 (38:15):
I've seen the previews.
Speaker 18 (38:16):
Well, honestly, this was not my first's choice. I mean,
a serial killer body switch movie. In't exactly got Festivus written.
Speaker 4 (38:23):
All over, but it's not bad.
Speaker 2 (38:26):
What's the story?
Speaker 18 (38:28):
Okay, there's this serial killer loose called the Butcher. He
targets an unpopular high school girl with an ancient christ
dagger that he stole. He stabs it in the shoulder
and she gets away. But in the morning they both
wake up to discover that in the other one's body,
and the clock is ticking because in twenty four hours
(38:48):
it becomes privateent. It's scary, it's funny. It's the whole
smear of cream, cheese and a cinematic bagel.
Speaker 4 (38:56):
Whatever the hell that mean?
Speaker 2 (38:58):
How's a cast?
Speaker 4 (39:00):
Well, I guess they're fine. I don't really know.
Speaker 2 (39:02):
How were they in the movie.
Speaker 4 (39:04):
Oh, everybody was good. And that lead guy is great.
Speaker 18 (39:08):
He's been in movies like Vending Smashes and Old Time School.
Speaker 4 (39:13):
He's that great actor.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
Vince Gill, Vince Vaughn, you're thinking of Vince Vaughn.
Speaker 4 (39:20):
I thought that was the guy from Muttley Crow.
Speaker 2 (39:23):
That's Vince Neil.
Speaker 4 (39:25):
I thought that was the basketball guy.
Speaker 2 (39:27):
That's Vince Carter.
Speaker 4 (39:29):
I thought that was the wrestling guy who's in love
with himself.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
That's Vince McMahon.
Speaker 4 (39:35):
I thought that was the football coach with the all
pro spitting gap in his teeth.
Speaker 2 (39:40):
That's Vince Lombardi.
Speaker 4 (39:43):
I thought that was the guy that Hillary didn't kill.
Speaker 2 (39:45):
That's Vince Foster.
Speaker 4 (39:49):
I thought that was the painter guy who cut his
ear off.
Speaker 2 (39:51):
That's Vincent van Go.
Speaker 4 (39:53):
I thought that was the old timey straight actor that
list like a sissy boy.
Speaker 2 (39:57):
That's Vincent Price.
Speaker 4 (40:01):
Well, who the hell am I thinking of?
Speaker 2 (40:03):
Vince Vaughn.
Speaker 4 (40:04):
Boy. He got fat Disney instead of sex, drugs, rock
and roll.
Speaker 18 (40:09):
It looks like fried tweakies, Snickers and jelly rolls.
Speaker 2 (40:13):
So what's a verdict?
Speaker 18 (40:15):
He should stop eating the punching, but he looks like
a Drink's coffee cake in a Crystal Gale Wig. The
movie verdict, well, in the nuts set, it's not too shabby.
Not for kids though, or smart adults, but not too shabby.
I give it four out of the five yarmickers, So
go do watch or don't. I don't care anymore. But
(40:38):
if you go see him at night, it's cheaper.
Speaker 4 (40:43):
Yo, morning, rednecks. This is your Pompertus of love.
Speaker 14 (40:48):
Ike Turner enjoying the hell out of my retirement, drinking liquors,
eating vinies, and when I get to Jones in for
a crack and a go with it, I tune in
the John Boy and on the Big Show. If why
I done lost my appetite for crackers?
Speaker 2 (41:40):
Good morning and Merry Christmas. It is our last show
before Christmas. Twenty and twenty Messy John Boone, Milly Christmas
Eveday Saturdays. Thanks I Man, RANDI is really stepped it up.
Twenty twenty made this a year to remember.
Speaker 5 (42:03):
That guffar at the end.
Speaker 4 (42:06):
I got that same five dude. This is like that
time he almost named me employee of the year.
Speaker 2 (42:13):
Man, I was talking earlier this morning, on this day,
like nineteen ninety seven, were the holiday episode of Seinfeld
Festivus episode, so it was festival day always on December
twenty third. Do you all remember the rules for that?
The festiv Us traditions derived from the episode of Final Seinfeld.
All right, adorn an aluminum festiv Us pole to be
(42:36):
displayed in the home.
Speaker 4 (42:37):
Got it?
Speaker 2 (42:38):
Now, I don't get this. It says in the O'Keefe
household there was no pole. Instead, a clock was placed
in a bag and nailed to the wall. One that
wasn't in that episode. That's the guy writing it.
Speaker 4 (42:52):
Okay, so yeah, that's the origin of it.
Speaker 2 (42:55):
Yeah, Oh that was a rider. Okay, all right? Oh O'Keefe.
Of course, why didn't we know that?
Speaker 4 (43:00):
I thought you do everything about that right there the credits.
Speaker 2 (43:03):
All right, So you're supposed to serve a traditional dinner
in the evening on the twenty third day. Now, during dinner,
allow the airing of grievances. Yes, indeed, each person takes
turns describing how the others have disappointed him or her
over the past.
Speaker 4 (43:21):
Ye, now you're gonna hear about it. Tells me your
place sucks.
Speaker 2 (43:31):
We better make George's boss was there.
Speaker 1 (43:34):
Better make sure it's a seven course dinner because it's
gonna take a while.
Speaker 2 (43:38):
So then feats of strength follows dinner and involves wrestling
the head of the household. So note the holiday is
not complete unless the head of the household is pinned.
So failure to pin the head of the household could
result in perpetual Festivus. To know that little tabby to
(44:00):
the room. And then finally, a Festivus miracle is a frequent,
if unimpressive miracle. You may count carrying all the groceries
into the house for dinner without tripping or dropping one
of the bags as a Festivus miracle.
Speaker 4 (44:16):
You remember what the Festivus miracle was? That the guys
from the betting parlor tracty lane down to the house.
Speaker 2 (44:23):
That is, I think so.
Speaker 4 (44:26):
A happy festive Us.
Speaker 2 (44:30):
Ain't got much to do. I should take them some
time today for you.
Speaker 4 (44:33):
I'm not I gotta wrestle this guy.
Speaker 2 (44:38):
Good morning, Big shows on the radio, coming up the
easiest way for you to win this morning, that'd be
the current events quiz take See get a liquid performance
automotive cleaning and detailing kid. They could performance the world's
highest quality full synthetic gasoline and diesel fuel additives. You
go to Big Show dot Com, click on the liquid
Performance banner. You get twenty percent off all appear arance,
(45:00):
maintenance and performance products. When you intercode jb B at
checkout hang on, you win you some in minutes. The
first year a Big Show classic many many years ago.
I think it's way back forward. Syndicated wasn't boys. It's
called a Christmas Goober, London, eighteen ninety seven.
Speaker 12 (45:30):
Our drive city filled with grimy, smoke filled sweatshops, sweaty,
grime filed smoke shops, smokey, sweat filled while you get
the idea, this is not club med we're talking about.
It's dark, it's depressing, and no place is more dark
and depressing than the Mega Little Shop of Goob and
Molly run by Ebenezer Goob. As our story opens, Ebenezer
(45:51):
is talking with his chief Lucky Robert Dave Ratchett.
Speaker 20 (45:55):
Mister Goob, you're a cruel, heartless slave driver. With no
sense of kindness or understand Guess that's why I've always
looked up to you. Be that as it may, I'm
deeply saddened by the way you have refused to close
the office on Christmas Day.
Speaker 12 (46:08):
Christmas, that's just another excuse to pick a bad's pocket
if you ask me close the office, Oh Christmas, the hubbug,
get back to work here. Ratchet, by the way, stop
hanging all those Thou shalt not.
Speaker 2 (46:21):
Smoke sides around the office.
Speaker 12 (46:23):
Goodness, say yes, abenez Agobe isn't exactly a candidate for
the Jefferson Awards, if you know what I mean. Later
that night, Abenezer is at home getting ready for bed
when he hears a strange sound. Bayn, what did the
A ghostly apparition appears before him.
Speaker 21 (46:45):
He Whatsubman, I'm the gorsed of Bob Marley.
Speaker 2 (46:50):
Hey, wait a bit it My dead partner was Jacob Barley.
Speaker 21 (46:53):
I know, but the writers thought this would be a
better joke, man, and they figured we could use one.
Speaker 2 (46:59):
Right about now.
Speaker 21 (47:00):
Anyway, I'm here to tell you, before the night is over,
you'll be visited by three spirits. They'll show you how
you're squandering your existence on the art man, and if
we're going to keep this thing under five minutes, they
better show up pretty soon.
Speaker 12 (47:15):
Mom, ghost of Bob Barley, And I thought I had
some stupid material. The hubbud Abeneza falls back into a
troubled sleep, but it's awakened leg of that same night
by another ghost sleep figure, Are you the ghost of
Christmas past?
Speaker 2 (47:35):
All my life for a fight about it?
Speaker 12 (47:39):
I come to talk to youans about how you've handled.
Speaker 4 (47:42):
Your life in the past.
Speaker 2 (47:45):
How if I did not?
Speaker 12 (47:52):
Suddenly a second spirit of Pairs. Hello, Abeneze a Goma,
that's Ebenezer Goober.
Speaker 2 (47:59):
You must be the ghost of Christmas Present.
Speaker 13 (48:02):
Right you?
Speaker 4 (48:02):
Our baby?
Speaker 12 (48:03):
Hey, I just came back to tell you, if you
don't stop being such a pill, you'll have a ghost
of a chance of getting a Christmas present. Ha ha,
Hold on, baby, big a butt head on another dimensional plane.
See you tell Cindy Patterson. I'll get right back to her. Yeah, babe,
at that moment, our third ghost of.
Speaker 2 (48:20):
Pairs, Yoh, what's up?
Speaker 12 (48:22):
I guess you must be the ghost of Christmas Future.
I reckon, Hey, let me tell my paperwork here? Huh, yeah,
that's you.
Speaker 6 (48:30):
Yeah, I'm here to show you how you're gonna be
a butt head for the rest of your life, and
then when you die, nobody gonna come to your funeral
and stuff.
Speaker 2 (48:36):
Listen.
Speaker 6 (48:37):
I love to develop the concept a little more, but
this thing is really a little bit long.
Speaker 2 (48:40):
Listen jump to page seven. When you break down and
start liking Christmas and stuff, can.
Speaker 4 (48:43):
We do well?
Speaker 2 (48:44):
Harford, put a little bore into it, sud for.
Speaker 12 (48:47):
When I'm getting paid, I'm the one ought to be
saying dull humbug all right, all right, hey Robin. Top
of page Seford, quick the heart wrenching scenes. Roveo te
everbody's a goal one. This Christmas Eve change has outright forever.
In a single dramatic night, he goes from full time
butt head to bleeding heart sentimentalist. And so the next day, Hey,
(49:10):
Robert d Ratchet, tiny taim Bye bed, Bye bed.
Speaker 2 (49:14):
What's happy?
Speaker 21 (49:14):
Dudes?
Speaker 2 (49:15):
Why mister goob, you've changed? What's happening to you?
Speaker 12 (49:19):
I'm full of the joy of Christmas, good buddy, the
joy of Christmas.
Speaker 7 (49:23):
You. That's right.
Speaker 2 (49:25):
Put up to office supplies.
Speaker 8 (49:26):
Boys.
Speaker 12 (49:27):
We gonna have us a Christmas throw down, ain't they right?
Speaker 7 (49:30):
Over?
Speaker 4 (49:30):
Every days ago? Where yo, mister Gooble, this is a
pleasant surprise.
Speaker 20 (49:34):
You the meanest curmudgeon of the nineteenth century, full of
the love and joy of the holiday season. I'm impressed.
Say about that, no smoking lounge in the basement.
Speaker 12 (49:45):
Don't push you, Luck Ratchet. From that day forward, Ebenezer
goob was a new mine. Hey, you know what you
get when you cross Robert D. Ratchet with a pig bathing.
There's some things even a pig won't do.
Speaker 7 (49:59):
Duha.
Speaker 12 (50:00):
Now, if we can only get him some new jokes,
I'm Robin Leach with agnog wishers and candy cane dreams
for you and yours this holiday season.
Speaker 2 (50:09):
Or as Tony tim would say, no, no, no, not
that thing.
Speaker 6 (50:15):
Oh God bless us everyone.
Speaker 2 (50:17):
That's better.
Speaker 10 (50:19):
Happy holidays, Our memories shaved in the bowels of my mind.
Speaker 2 (50:38):
Whatever that word? Yeah, all right, y'all, let's play the
current events quiz Bentley, what are we dealing with?
Speaker 5 (50:47):
Some helpful hints on how to keep you happy in
your romantic relationship?
Speaker 2 (50:51):
Ride one eight hundred Big show you told free line
Take seeing with were playing a
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
Popular Podcasts
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Intentionally Disturbing
Join me on this podcast as I navigate the murky waters of human behavior, current events, and personal anecdotes through in-depth interviews with incredible people—all served with a generous helping of sarcasm and satire. After years as a forensic and clinical psychologist, I offer a unique interview style and a low tolerance for bullshit, quickly steering conversations toward depth and darkness. I honor the seriousness while also appreciating wit. I’m your guide through the twisted labyrinth of the human psyche, armed with dark humor and biting wit.