Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Good morning, Big shows on the radio, will beat the
Blonde for the Big Old Law Tigers Prize back in minute. First,
Alabama fans listen up. Bob Ibob joins us this morning
for a special special announcement.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Good morning, Bob Hey, Good morning John Boy and Billy.
And you know this announcement was going to make me
feel a little ancient because when I was covering college
football back in the seventies, Bear Bryant was the king,
you know, of Bama football, and I never thought anybody
would come along and either come close to equaling or
(00:35):
surpassing what he did. Well. Nick Saban is the man,
and of course Nick is not going to be patrolling
the sidelines anymore. Be strange this Saturday night to see
another coach out there, Kaylan, coach Kaylin. And this football
that we're doing to honor Nick Saban, he approved it.
It's the only football and he's approved through Nico Sports.
(01:00):
And I'm going to give you all the cool information
and what it looks like and how you can order
this in just a second, because only five thousand of
these officially licensed full sized Nick Saban footballs to commemorate
his Hall of Fame career, at Alabama will ever be produced.
They're going to be priced at one hundred and twenty
(01:20):
nine dollars and ninety five cents each. A portion of
the proceeds will go to the charity of choice by Alabama,
which is Yay Alabama helps out a lot of student athletes. There,
you'll get an individually numbered certificate of authenticity with the
purchase of each ball. And before I give out that
phone number in website how you can get this Nick
(01:42):
Saban Historical National Football with all it got a couple
cool photographs of coach Saban on there. The top panel
has one of those photos of coach Nick Saban, all
six National Championship logos of the games that he won
for the Champion Chips, the opponents that he faced and beat,
(02:03):
and the scores of each game that he won at Alabama.
The panel right below that has some of Sabans Alabama
season records from two thousand and seven to twenty and
twenty three. His overall record. I took a look at
that record, two hundred and six wins against just twenty
nine losses for an eighty seven point seven percent winning
(02:27):
those over in the SEC. Boy, he battered those guys
he won one hundred and twenty times against just eighteen
losses and was sixteen and seven in bowl games, so
amazing record. All that information will be on that panel,
and then the last panel has got a second color
photograph of Sabans championship history along with coach Saban and
(02:49):
some of the awards he won in postseasons and from
other outlets that awarded him certain coaching achievements. So all
that is on this foot. It's one of a kind.
You won't be able to buy it anywhere else, uh,
but through the toll free number and website that I'm
about to give out, and this is approved by coach Saban.
(03:10):
This is the only football that honors his Hall of
Fame career. Here's the number, eight hundred three four five
two eight sixty eight. That's eight hundred three four five
twenty eight sixty eight. Or you can go right to
the website. You can see it nicosports dot com. It's
spelled nikcosports dot com. That's nikcosports dot com. Or just
(03:37):
hit them up at eight hundred three four five twenty
eight sixty eight. Do not delay, because I've already known
that there's people that are out there buying five and
six of these for holiday gift ideas for Alabama fans
over the years. This is a special Alabama football to
honor coach Nick Saban.
Speaker 1 (03:57):
Told you Alabama fans and be war of the right here. Okay,
we got to set up to at the Big Show
dot Com. Click on the Nikosports banner. It'll take you
right there the Big Show dot Com. Click on Nikosports
and we got that. Eight hundred three four five twenty
eight sixty eight. All right, Bob, good deal, buddy. We'll
check back. Don't let him sell out without you checking
back with me.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
All right, all right, listen, we will do that later
in the week. You have a wonderful week coming up
and roll tied.
Speaker 3 (04:25):
All right, Bob, Thank you buddy. All right, Well, let's
get to our game.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
Let's play Beat the Blonde one eight hundred Big Show
you told free Line.
Speaker 3 (04:32):
We'll get a contestant and play next. Good morning, and
(04:58):
it's a make show on the radio. On to do
your Tuesday.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Today's feature track from the Big Show, Big Box Marvin
Webster on Gilligan's Island Sirgery keyword Gilligan brought you by.
Speaker 3 (05:09):
Lawn Tiger's motorcycle.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
Lawyer's a ride wrestled for the custom Big Show Motorcycle
at Big Show Bike dot com.
Speaker 3 (05:17):
And right now see you gain beating the blonde?
Speaker 1 (05:22):
Did you name have the most the law Tigers prize package?
Speaker 4 (05:28):
Here?
Speaker 1 (05:29):
Say headed John from Newburgh, Indiana.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
Good morning John, by.
Speaker 5 (05:39):
John, it's John John.
Speaker 3 (05:40):
John, all right, color.
Speaker 1 (05:46):
Hey, he goes on, longtime listener.
Speaker 3 (05:51):
I love you love you mean it.
Speaker 6 (05:52):
All right, John.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
We'll glad you in here, buddy.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
Maybe read Taylor and get two bells before two buzzers.
Speaker 3 (05:59):
And he's not really a book. It's kind of more
like a pamphlet or a leaflet. You'll be all right,
sneak for yourself.
Speaker 1 (06:10):
Well that start out, y'all with a good old true
or false question. OK, I know you're a big Elvis fan.
Speaker 7 (06:17):
There t.
Speaker 1 (06:19):
Nineteen seventy five, two college co eds had themselves created
and shipped to Elvis Presley for his fortieth birthday.
Speaker 8 (06:31):
True, but unfortunately they were supposed to arrive for his
thirty eighth birthday.
Speaker 9 (06:37):
It was the whole thing.
Speaker 1 (06:40):
Wile they created themselves up and nailed themselves to Elvis.
True true, Tata says, all right, John, agree or disagree?
Speaker 6 (06:52):
What was the year.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
It was nineteen seventy five. Well, i'll go through.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
You're gonna say true, you agree, and I agree that
was the thing to do.
Speaker 6 (07:10):
Uh huh.
Speaker 3 (07:11):
True, but the package was refused.
Speaker 5 (07:14):
No, no, all.
Speaker 3 (07:18):
Right, there there's that first bail for your John. Good work, y'all.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
All right, Well, Marcy, let's go to some child psychologists.
According to the good Ones, at what age does a
child usually began to understand the meaning of a spanking?
Speaker 5 (07:38):
I know the meaning changed from me when I was
about twenty four.
Speaker 8 (07:45):
True, okay, child run five?
Speaker 1 (07:54):
Age age five back kindergarten age back in old day.
Speaker 3 (07:58):
Huh John? Do you agree or disagree with age five?
Speaker 1 (08:07):
I'm gonna disagree, disagreeing right on the news that data.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
Watch five age five.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
All right, that's all right, gonna winn to lose it
right here, and good old true or false question. Some
women tear up more when they take birth control pills.
Speaker 8 (08:28):
I know some men who cry when they don't.
Speaker 3 (08:36):
False tear up more?
Speaker 1 (08:38):
You say, false? Women do not tear up more when taking.
Speaker 5 (08:44):
Crying in control?
Speaker 3 (08:48):
John, agree or disagree? Yeah, I'm gonna go false with
with her.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
I agree, So you agree and it's true it's true.
Speaker 3 (09:03):
It's true.
Speaker 1 (09:05):
I knows you can't be convincing because he's not here enough.
Speaker 8 (09:10):
John.
Speaker 1 (09:10):
We're gonna hook you up with a nice consolation prize, Bunny.
Speaker 3 (09:13):
If you hang over, Jackie will do.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
That, all right, Thank you, John Boy love you mean it?
Speaker 3 (09:18):
But I got you, my boy.
Speaker 10 (09:26):
Yeah, yes, it is.
Speaker 3 (09:30):
Bottom of the hour.
Speaker 6 (09:31):
Tell me your.
Speaker 10 (09:31):
News time came on the other side. What you say, Oh,
(10:05):
this is.
Speaker 11 (10:06):
The award winning Jah Boy and Billy Big show, the
South's number one export.
Speaker 3 (10:20):
You're a little Hendrick thanking for it?
Speaker 6 (10:23):
Oh man?
Speaker 12 (10:23):
Yeah, well, you know he was our biggest inspiration. We
do a lot of Jerry and.
Speaker 6 (10:32):
Get out there, Jared Richard. You know I couldn't make
out all the words of the song when I was learning,
(11:02):
and the plays go bathing and said one of whom
I will go to someone when you see the one,
let it just boom, and the wind the cries.
Speaker 3 (11:20):
Marry, who can't cover the.
Speaker 4 (11:31):
You and the dog Latin the wo.
Speaker 3 (11:39):
See a game. I'm going let me just check both
of them.
Speaker 6 (11:46):
I need to give. And the wind.
Speaker 3 (11:52):
Cry Marry that was good, and the bunches of Tom
(12:21):
the news and.
Speaker 12 (12:25):
The wind.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Crying all right, all right, that's wonderful, all.
Speaker 6 (12:34):
Right, Yeah, John Boy.
Speaker 9 (12:41):
And Billy, there's a lot of love in this room.
We love you, we hope you love us.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Good morning, We're yelled dumb right.
Speaker 1 (13:18):
Good morning. It's a big shaw on the radio. Twenty
minutes a wedding, sports briefs. No man out of Saint
Louis Moury's man Now action.
Speaker 13 (13:32):
Hello friends, your old hell bird Fern Here with another
overy oscillating edition of John Boy and Billy Playhouse Today's
episode on the ball. As our story opens, a rather
unshaven man enters a salon.
Speaker 3 (13:47):
Uh, knock, knock, you take men here?
Speaker 5 (13:49):
This is a unisex salon.
Speaker 3 (13:51):
Yeah, I'm not interested in your pronouns. I just want
to know if you.
Speaker 14 (13:54):
Can give me a shave, sure thing, Have a seat, Ben,
There's so many darn places that just can't get the
job done well.
Speaker 5 (14:01):
It seems like a simple job.
Speaker 14 (14:02):
It seems like I have a terrible time getting a
close shaver on my cheeks. It absolutely but devils me.
Speaker 5 (14:09):
I got you, boo, I've got you. I've seen this
problem many times and I've got just the thing.
Speaker 3 (14:15):
Here you go, is this small wooden ball?
Speaker 5 (14:18):
Correct?
Speaker 3 (14:20):
So what am I supposed to do with this.
Speaker 5 (14:21):
We'll just pop it in your mouth and place it
between your chicken gum.
Speaker 3 (14:24):
Are you serious? I'm not the kind of guy that
goes around popping balls in his mouth.
Speaker 5 (14:32):
I'm not touching that with a ten football.
Speaker 3 (14:34):
Oh no, there's a ten foot pole. What kind of
place is this suck?
Speaker 5 (14:40):
Do you want to close shave or not?
Speaker 4 (14:42):
Well?
Speaker 3 (14:43):
Okay, here goes.
Speaker 8 (14:47):
So do you from around here?
Speaker 12 (14:52):
Me too?
Speaker 5 (14:53):
How about this weather?
Speaker 6 (14:58):
Me too?
Speaker 5 (15:00):
Okay, there's the left side.
Speaker 7 (15:01):
Check it out.
Speaker 3 (15:02):
Oh oh my, oh my, that's as smooth as an egg.
Speaker 5 (15:09):
I told you. Okay, let's do the other side.
Speaker 3 (15:12):
I just had a thought. What happens if I swallow
this thing?
Speaker 5 (15:15):
No problem, just bring it back tomorrow. Oh okay, like
everyone else.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
And.
Speaker 9 (15:30):
We hope you enjoyed John Boy and Billy Playhouse. I
think the last guy I ate haggis tune in next time.
Speaker 3 (15:38):
Then we'll hear the customer who ate the Hagers saying, hey,
big man, let me hold a dollar. Yeah, you more
than everybody.
Speaker 9 (15:50):
You got a big showing a radio, right, big showing
a radio. Ah, let's take any newsletter sports. This is
Spanky from the Yellow Rod.
Speaker 11 (16:00):
You're listening to the greatest morning show and recorded history
of broadcast radio, John Boy and Billy Big Show.
Speaker 6 (16:08):
How big is it?
Speaker 9 (16:09):
Bigger than my head?
Speaker 3 (16:11):
And that's big.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
There?
Speaker 9 (16:14):
Yeah, o b I read it? Not pay that tabby
a seat dead.
Speaker 3 (16:17):
Be good Morning's big show on the radio.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
Ayway, couldn't you a tribute one about seventy to the day?
Oh look the cap going, yes said listen you missed
in it. Check out John Oobiller Lake Riser's podcast when
it has a wall.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
He's gonna want to hear us right now. We're getting
close to the bottom of the peewee barrel. You say,
love me.
Speaker 12 (17:20):
They're together on the motion picture screen for the first time.
He's the world's toughest cop.
Speaker 3 (17:26):
Go ahead, punk, make my dad.
Speaker 12 (17:30):
He's dirty Peewee and he's stalking the world's deadliest comedian.
Speaker 3 (17:35):
You gotta ask yourself one question, what's the secret word?
He's big top Harry, that's my name. Don't wear it out.
Speaker 12 (17:44):
Eastwood and Herman together in Dirty Big Top Pee Wee Harry.
Speaker 3 (17:49):
You're under arrest.
Speaker 12 (17:51):
I know you are, But what am I don't pick
Dirty Big Top pee Wee Harry. Two half Wits, One
Stupid movie.
Speaker 3 (18:05):
Good morning, got the big show on the radio.
Speaker 1 (18:07):
Play with that Southern East Pets bag on a couple
of rounds of worthy word coming up.
Speaker 3 (18:14):
We're right now, give him up bad, I said, Louis,
I'm Jody all the world of sports.
Speaker 9 (18:21):
Here's how you do want to see you shorts. He's
got spooks on, who's got the contract, who's up to that?
Speaker 12 (18:28):
Who might be on.
Speaker 7 (18:30):
Sorcer?
Speaker 3 (18:32):
They're going wrong? Good morning, Terry, Hey guys, Hey you doing.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
Hey buddy, We're awesome, man, be looking forward to this week.
I know you told us you had Paul Horning story
from Notre Dame to the Green Bay Packers. They're working
for Hanson, the Golden Boy, Paul Horne. But we decide
if you can put that off for a week because
I reminded you of something you were talking about, Nolan
Ryan towing our first one hundred mile an hour fastball.
(18:58):
Then I remember some story about you told me about
you using a pitchon radar gun, one of them wild
handsome things you had going on.
Speaker 15 (19:05):
When I was living in Rochester, I was watching baseball
and that's the first time I ever became aware of
a radar gun in baseball. So I moved to DC
and I was going to have a media day at
RFK Stadium, and the idea was to have the players
out on the field and I had like concessionnaires come through,
guys beer, guys hawking beer. That's kind of a good idea.
(19:27):
And I wanted to have the radar gun because I
wanted the media to come out and kick and see
how hard they could kick the ball. So I sent
my intern up to the Baltimore Orioles who had one,
and they said I could have it. He called me
from Baltimore and he goes, carry, I got a problem.
A scout took it on the road. I went, holy,
(19:48):
I mean that was my whole plan. So I called
the DC Police Department and I asked him, you know,
if they had a radar gun I could borrow. When
the guy said, are you kidding me?
Speaker 7 (19:58):
And you hung up.
Speaker 15 (20:00):
Then another cop calls me back and his son's a
soccer fan. He goes, look, we can't give you a
radar gun, but we'll bring a police car out. I said,
a police car. He said yeah. They pulled into RFK
Stadium with a police car and we got a policeman
up there holding a radar gun. Well these are kicking.
Speaker 8 (20:21):
Uh.
Speaker 15 (20:22):
The ABC Evening News.
Speaker 3 (20:25):
Picked that up.
Speaker 15 (20:26):
It was just I mean, it was terrific and it
was really good and everybody really liked it. And had
a similar situation when I was doing a golf tournament
in Jamaica. The Minister of Tourism got a hold of
me and said that the concord, remember the jet.
Speaker 3 (20:44):
Playing the concord.
Speaker 15 (20:45):
Absolute was making his first appearance in Jamaica and could
he get it on television. Terry Jastro was the producer
for ABC. His wife was Ann Archer, the actress who
was in Fatal Attraction, and so ABC was gonna do
a flyover and then we're gonna cover the concord. So
the concord flies over and they're at commercial, so we
(21:09):
take the concord out in a holding pattern and then
Terry Jastro says the high blight of his career is saying, okay,
cue the concord. The popcord came and flew very over
the top of the golf course and we had it
on TV. And again the ABC Evening News picked that
up and we had it on the nation.
Speaker 3 (21:32):
That's awesome. A lot of these things you just fell
into didn't you have, Buddy, I had no idea what
I was doing. You gotta get out of that try.
That's the message we are learning from you.
Speaker 1 (21:43):
I can't wait to hear about the Golden Boy, the
legendary Number five Paul Horning.
Speaker 3 (21:48):
We'll do that next week, Brian Bonny.
Speaker 15 (21:50):
This invoves the lawsuit, so it'll be interesting.
Speaker 3 (21:55):
Alright, Darren kiss kids man love you meant it? Okay,
Buddy go Bob idea.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
Well, let's play our worthy word one ain't under the
Big Show you told free line. We'll get a couple
contestants team up and play. Next is a big shown
(22:33):
already O yeah, uh huh.
Speaker 3 (22:36):
With the nice feature triving to make show big box.
Marvin Webster on Gilligan's Island. It's a classic, the word.
Speaker 1 (22:43):
Gilligan's a big bugs at the Big Show dot Com
clicking on their contest button.
Speaker 3 (22:49):
What they do?
Speaker 7 (22:50):
Then?
Speaker 4 (22:50):
Can you do?
Speaker 3 (22:51):
Then't call you?
Speaker 9 (22:52):
Here we go. I had everybody's head about the bed
where you're gonna word anywhere?
Speaker 1 (22:58):
Let's meet the contestants. We got Tyler from Midway, Georgia.
Good morning, Tyler, good morning, Hey buddy, welcome. Then you're
playing Allen out of Following's me in West Virginia. Good morning, Allen,
Good morning, go boy, Good morning Alan. That's Tyler from
Georgia and Tyler.
Speaker 3 (23:17):
That's Allan. I'm West Virginia. I'm bore.
Speaker 1 (23:19):
Say hey, hey, hey, all right, big show.
Speaker 3 (23:24):
Listeners meeting over the states.
Speaker 4 (23:26):
I love it.
Speaker 1 (23:26):
So Tater and Allen will make up one team. It'll
be John Boyn Tyler on the other.
Speaker 7 (23:33):
Looking for there.
Speaker 15 (23:34):
You ready?
Speaker 3 (23:35):
All right?
Speaker 1 (23:35):
Allan, you relax and me and Tyler we'll go for
the first thirty seconds.
Speaker 3 (23:39):
Sorry, Tyler, you ready, buddy, Yes, sir, all right? Start
the clock now. I want a big blank TV big
what be quackering? Yes? Green?
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Uh huh okay the uh semper five. You are in
this branch of the service, Marien, Yes, uh huh.
Speaker 3 (23:59):
Don't eat that egg it is. Don't be a blank
don't be a blank egg when something yes rotten?
Speaker 1 (24:07):
Uh huh?
Speaker 3 (24:07):
Noah built an arc for the blood, uh huh. I'm
gonna go out this squirrel season. I'm gonna go.
Speaker 1 (24:15):
Yeah, good work there. Time to put a five on
the board. So let's see what Alan and Taylor can
do for their round one. Alan, you ready, buddy, Yes.
Speaker 3 (24:27):
Okay, and go.
Speaker 8 (24:29):
The opposite of back is your yep, rise with it,
the smallest in the litter. Okay, rise with it.
Speaker 5 (24:38):
This is what the kicker will do in football, just
a it's not a kickoff, he just does what. Yes,
rise with it? This is uh you have a blank
man in the movies?
Speaker 2 (24:49):
He does?
Speaker 3 (24:50):
He does.
Speaker 5 (24:51):
Yes. This is a cake with a hole in the middle.
It's called a what cake? Yep? Okay, this is a win.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
This is sorry all right, will y'all put a five
on the board as well, so it's five to five here.
Speaker 3 (25:07):
Got a good game going, boys, So let's see what
we can do for round two.
Speaker 5 (25:11):
Sorry, we're giving them.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
I heard that glasses. Okay, Tyler, are you ready, Boddy? Okay,
starting the clock. Now, I'm gonna blank you to join
me officially, blank you to come in.
Speaker 3 (25:33):
Yes, uh huh, all right.
Speaker 1 (25:34):
You can't buy liquor. You are a you're under twenty one, yes,
uh huh okay. The opposite of life is uh huh.
Speaker 3 (25:43):
The opposite of the present is the or the future. Yes,
uh huh Uh. I have a broken arm. It has a.
Speaker 1 (25:54):
Rhymes with it. You put it on your broken arm? Yes, okay,
another five on there? Sir, yeahs are a little more anxious.
Speaker 3 (26:09):
All right, Allan and Taylor. Five will tie and force
over time. Six will win you still ready?
Speaker 5 (26:16):
Ready go the opposite of slow hot. This is rhymes
with it. This is what you have on a sailboat.
Rac yep, Okay, this is not rhyming. Just just chill out.
It's just blank.
Speaker 14 (26:32):
Yes.
Speaker 5 (26:33):
This is when they say you buy fruit. That's this.
It doesn't have any pesticides or antibiotics. It's what it's from. Yeah,
but there's a word for it. It's what from the earth.
It's yes. You put your letters in this at your.
Speaker 3 (26:48):
House mail box and you got five four five in
a row?
Speaker 4 (26:58):
Will go?
Speaker 3 (26:59):
Time this we do? Alright, boys, see.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
If we can settle it with an extra fifteen seconds
fifteen seconds. Tyler is gonna go buy a quick buddy.
Let's see what we can do.
Speaker 3 (27:13):
All right, all right, all right, here we go.
Speaker 6 (27:17):
All right.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
Okay, that's called thinking.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
Yeah, all right, John Boyn Tyler ready, no, don't know, okay,
ready go. They put your food in a brown paper, yes,
uh huh. Will you be my best blank friend?
Speaker 7 (27:40):
Yes, uh huh.
Speaker 3 (27:40):
You plant this one of these in the ground and
it grows the plant of what.
Speaker 9 (27:46):
No, no, no, no, you put it in the ground.
Speaker 3 (27:53):
My bed Tyler stung it up on that fifteen.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
But you put a two on the board. Good work
on your in now, Tayter and Allen. Two will force
double over time.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
Three will win big enough on that last one and go.
Speaker 8 (28:09):
It's time to throw out some grass. Blank pete, Okay, move, move,
says the what.
Speaker 4 (28:19):
Up?
Speaker 5 (28:19):
You have two of these it filters, water mix urine
blank beard.
Speaker 9 (28:25):
Yes, you're in then kidney for the wind.
Speaker 5 (28:31):
That's your for the wind, Bob.
Speaker 3 (28:36):
Tyler, Man, we came up a little shore. They snug
it out on.
Speaker 9 (28:41):
Show.
Speaker 3 (28:42):
You sure can't go ahead, buddy.
Speaker 16 (28:44):
I like to give a shout out to my wife Brianna,
and my daughter Addison, and two guys that work with
Chris and Allen.
Speaker 3 (28:50):
Hello, right, don appreciate you and yours down that midway.
Speaker 4 (28:53):
Love.
Speaker 1 (28:53):
You made it, buddy. You try again and island up
in West Virginia. You got the big old Southern East
pets back for you.
Speaker 3 (29:00):
Victory. Good game.
Speaker 1 (29:01):
Man.
Speaker 10 (29:01):
Oh I thank you.
Speaker 11 (29:03):
I've been wanting to beat up on you for a
long time since you at Jamboury in the Hills.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
Man jamboree in the hills. That was fun, wasn't it.
Yeh shirt, Well good then.
Speaker 1 (29:15):
Finally you got me back for something I probably did
during the Charlie danielself.
Speaker 9 (29:20):
Yeah huh, first time.
Speaker 6 (29:22):
Foller here too, John boy.
Speaker 3 (29:24):
All my boy, good morning. I got the big show
on the radio.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
Bit request time Alan Snead from Newborn, North Carolina. Hey, guys,
his gross, but that's why I like him. Play me
a grumby old man. Please have me to the end
there I kept reading, all right, who's yeah it's a
grumby old man coming up next? Yeah, the morn its
(30:14):
make Shaw on the radio will be request from Alan Snead,
a beautiful new Born, North Carolina. A Bevan spots man
went over the big bridge looking down.
Speaker 3 (30:24):
There's nice a nice spot. Oh anyway you get a
pool of s to allen. Yes, you wake up grumpy
this morning. No on your sleep here, but there's requests
with a grumpy old man. It's time for a visit
(30:49):
from the grumpy old man.
Speaker 11 (30:52):
I libberty flu I'm old and I hate doctor pimple Papa.
In my day, we didn't have any ZiT zappin boiled
bursting carbocle kracking, puschial poking, whitehead waisting, acne assassinating specialty doctors.
Speaker 9 (31:12):
You did it the old fashioned way.
Speaker 11 (31:15):
You had your cousin suck them out, Doctor pimple Papa,
yipp aitny ding dang do. How proud her parents must
have been shilling out hundreds of thousands of dollars for
medical school, hoping for a brain doctor or a heart specialist.
(31:35):
But imagine they're surprised when they stopped by her fancy
new office and saw that.
Speaker 9 (31:40):
Shingle doctor Papa.
Speaker 11 (31:45):
They dropped to their knees, wailing at the sky, wondering
why she couldn't have chosen a profession with some dignity,
like a stripper.
Speaker 9 (31:56):
Or a hooker or.
Speaker 11 (31:58):
A player with a wnba. But no, she had to
be Oh bye God, pipple popper.
Speaker 6 (32:06):
Who knows.
Speaker 11 (32:07):
Maybe that level of stupid runs in the family. She
could get her other siblings to open an office park
with her. It would be a one stop shop for
every disgusting bodily function. After you got all that chunky
custard scooped out of that thing on your neck, you
can stop by doctor Booger yanker and get that snut
box cleaned out. Then stop next door to doctor Wax
(32:31):
see the ear cleaning magician. Just next door Professor Towjammer,
who recycled your foot cheese in the vegan dairy products
and laugh. But not least it's mister butt fingerer. He's
not a doctor. He's just got a disgusting hobby and
really long fingers. Whoop dee doop de doodley doo. Look
(32:52):
at me, I'm a ZiT squeezing lunatic. Watch me work
while you eat a big bowl of tapioca pudding. My
whole family is insane. Come visit our office park. It's
a big, slippery, waxy, smelly.
Speaker 9 (33:06):
Sticky mess. Welcome to the Disneyland of the disgusting.
Speaker 11 (33:10):
Respect the science, respect the science, and we like it.
Speaker 9 (33:17):
We loved it.
Speaker 11 (33:20):
In my day, we didn't have no fancy specialty doctors.
The town vet did everything from pulling teeth to delivering babies,
and sometimes.
Speaker 9 (33:30):
He even got him confused, and.
Speaker 11 (33:33):
Wasn't nothing for him to deliver a baby through the
mouth and go the long way around to yank that mola.
Speaker 9 (33:40):
It weren't always pretty, but it was always hilarious.
Speaker 11 (33:44):
If you had a boil or a people no one
cared when one got really swollen infected.
Speaker 9 (33:50):
We take bets on when it bursts.
Speaker 11 (33:53):
Why I fed our family for a year when Clyde
Bigglesworth boiled didn't erupt for nine months. Have to be
nearly ten times the size of Clyde himself. He looked
like a big, fat white grub worm with bifocals. It
was something, And on June third, nineteen thirty eight, it
finally erupted. The whole north side of the county looked
(34:15):
like a glazed doughnut. It was spectacular. Then there was
old Whitehead Johnson coming head to toe in big white pimples.
The only job he could get was traveling with a
circus as the human carbuncle.
Speaker 9 (34:31):
One hundred dollars to the man who could pin his
shoulders to the mat.
Speaker 11 (34:35):
Sure enough, in every town, some big corn fed mule
would look at skinny old white Head and figured him
for easy pickings. But the second he'd grab on to him,
those pimples would start popping, and white Head would squirt
out of his grip like a watermelon seed. That is
until the day all white Head come up against spider
grip funk Miller, spider grip had spikes on his hands
(35:01):
like a tarantuli, And once he got a holdier you
as all. His Whitehead kept his distance for a while,
but Spider Griff finally got a hold of him. He
put him in a bare hug and squeezed with all
of his might, and just before his eyes bugged out
of their sockets, old white Head popped like a white head.
(35:22):
Gallons are festering, disgusting effluvia covered the audience, and it
turned out to be herpes, and before long it spread
to the entire town, and there was no cure, and
we all died a painful, sticky, pimply death.
Speaker 9 (35:35):
And when we got the hell, the devil kept lansing
us with his pitchfork and laughing at us. All except
for white Head.
Speaker 11 (35:43):
He went to heaven because he accepted the Lord right
before he popped like a tick.
Speaker 9 (35:48):
Zippity diippity whippany doodley. Do look at me.
Speaker 11 (35:52):
I'm zip Man, Leader Supreme of the plus drenched county seat.
Now I've gone three rounds with Satan's potsticker and watching
non stop loops.
Speaker 9 (36:01):
Of clearest silk commercials.
Speaker 11 (36:04):
Save me, Lord from my ooze comed eternity. Read your Bible,
Read your Bible land way.
Speaker 3 (36:13):
Way off.
Speaker 9 (36:16):
Liberty flucked up?
Speaker 3 (36:20):
Could you go over that again?
Speaker 2 (36:22):
No?
Speaker 9 (36:23):
Liberty flu.
Speaker 3 (36:56):
Good morning, makes I's on the radio. I want your
Morb and Webster track. Where your John on Billy album?
At the bed box?
Speaker 1 (37:02):
Keyword Gilligan? Has it come up this few minutes with
Marvin Webster?
Speaker 6 (37:08):
Yo?
Speaker 3 (37:09):
What's up?
Speaker 9 (37:09):
How y'all doing?
Speaker 6 (37:10):
Man?
Speaker 7 (37:11):
I heard y'all have my homeboy Gilligan on the show yesterday. Man,
that brought back a lot of memories for me. Of course,
I guess everybody in America used to watch Gilligan's Island
when I was a little You know this, tell me
something never made sense to me. Why they miss and
missus Howell bring all them suitcases full of clothes. It
was only gonna be out for like a three hour tour,
it says so in the song. I mean all the
(37:31):
rest of these castaways were wearing the exact same thing
for twenty years. Gilligan stuck in that same dumb red
shirt and then bell bottoms for twenty years, Thirston in Love.
It always had a fresh change of clothes, And maybe
that's why they got struck on the island. The howls
brought all them damn suitcases, and the luggage sunk the boat.
Speaker 4 (37:49):
Is it just me?
Speaker 7 (37:50):
Or was Ginger just a little bit over dressed for
this trip?
Speaker 3 (37:54):
You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 7 (37:55):
I mean, they're like putting out a Honter Lulu harbor
in the middle of the afternoon, riding around in an
open boat in the ocean. It's got to be at
least ninety degrees, and who knows what the humidity was. Ginger,
I dressed up like Cher going to the Academy Awards. Hey, baby,
ever hear a pair of blue jeans? And can't nobody
tell me? These seven people lived together on a desert
island for twenty years and nobody got no loving you know.
(38:19):
I mean I figured the professor was nailing Mary Anne.
You know, every chance he got, basically, woo, why wouldn't you?
I mean, come on, and Ginger, babe like that. Don't
tell me she wasn't giving up for somebody. I mean,
I figured at least mister Howell was flipping on a.
Speaker 4 (38:36):
Quick fifty twice a week, because if you was married
to lovey, who you slipped? Ginger putt fifty twice a
week and beats a heck out of me how this
island stayed uncharted for all that time. I mean more
guest stars landing on Gilligan's Island in one season than
all eight.
Speaker 7 (38:52):
Years of The Love Boat put together. I mean, you
couldn't turn around without bumping into a bunch of cannibals
or the mosquitoes, or that Japanese guy in the submarine
didn't know World War two was over? Up that dude
that got into tidal wave and surfed all the way
from Hawaii. For goodness sakes, if the USFL had that
many people show up, they still be playing football. And
(39:13):
did they have like the best set of radio batteries
in the history of mankind?
Speaker 9 (39:17):
Or where?
Speaker 7 (39:18):
I mean that radio play NonStop from nineteen sixty two
right up to other time they got rescued in that
TV movie of the week, you know, and this was
twenty years for the Energizer ever come out. Of course,
you know, I know that they really didn't run the
same batteries the whole time, right, Like the professor probably
rigged up like some coconuts and a couple of gum rappers.
They did him a battery charge or something. That professor
(39:41):
either handy dude to have a round. I mean, how
long do you think that bunch would have lasted on
that island if he wasn't on that today. I figured
they've all been dead in about two weeks. Of course,
Gilligan would have been dead the first week, I'm sure.
And then on the other hand, if the professor was
such a genius, how come he never like built a raft?
Speaker 6 (40:01):
You know what I mean?
Speaker 4 (40:01):
I mean this do make telephones and golf carts and
electric lights and microwave ovens.
Speaker 7 (40:06):
Doing that satellite landed on the on the island and
he fixed the camera and it blasted it back home.
Speaker 4 (40:11):
I mean, this dude could fix anything except a little
eight inch hole in the bottom of the boot y'all
think about it.
Speaker 6 (40:18):
I'm out.
Speaker 7 (40:19):
The website.
Speaker 16 (40:21):
Detbox is here all your favorites from four decades in
The Big Show ninety nine says he's fifteenth for nine
ninety nine by him once play many where shopping bliitbox
online at the Bigshow dot Com Order Big Show Stuff
I followed. The number is eight hundred and four seven
to one stuff online services by Animate dot Com.
Speaker 1 (40:36):
This any Big Show today, hon't let that happen CAUs
it up John Obill and Late Rosers podcast. Man, wherever
you get your podcast, you make it easy. Subscribe to
us with a free iHeartRadio out wi Ya Hey.
Speaker 3 (40:50):
Re's your day, See you on tomorrow. Love you mane
it