May 7, 2025 • 41 mins
Wednesday (pt 1 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, John Boy has another “brand new” batch of Church Bulletin Bloopers (sigh).. - Tater has our latest entertainment news with another edition of Tatertainment News and a recap of What to Watch.. - John Boy’s neighbor/farming buddy, Nervel T. Wheeler stops by for a solid tip on how to avoid mowing.. - We’ll explore some of those things your mom told you that might have actually been true.. - and in honor of Mother's Day, we have The Top 10 Things Your Mom Taught You.. - Our Public Relations Officer, Andy Taylor takes on another listener complaint.. - and finally, will wrap things up with “The Mom Of Constant Sorrow”…
℗®© 2025 John Boy & Billy, Inc.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
That's Big show on the radio, John Bo Ben and Tyler.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Fellers ran to Jackie and you listening, Hi a pal,
You are listening to two of the funniest guys on
the radio and my fraternity brothers at the Raccoon Lodge,
John Boy and Philly on the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
Are they funny? Are they funny? Oh? Hello, Jump, chump
(01:01):
chump jump, Spring time? Living is eat? Did you know that?
Speaker 3 (01:10):
I like mister Rubb got it little do y'all loving Adam?
There's a brand new days.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
You see what you've done?
Speaker 4 (01:23):
That thought?
Speaker 5 (01:24):
You're all taking a turn?
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Okay, that's it.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
National Day.
Speaker 3 (01:33):
He's got a bunch of them here on May seventh,
National Tourism Day, National Packaging Design Day, National Roast Leg
of Lamb Day, and his favorite dish. Today is National
Interpreter Appreciation Day, National Bike to School Day, National School
(01:54):
Nurse Day, the National paste Up Day. And when newspapers, magazines,
and catalogs were compiled by hand, and those that work
so tediously in their position.
Speaker 6 (02:08):
You know I was one of those people. No, yeah,
I worked for our local hometown newspaper. I was a
photographer and we did paste up and mock ups in
our dark room.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
How about that? Okay, well look at you all right.
So that was the interesting part of these national days.
So let's help go.
Speaker 3 (02:30):
To our three Saved up Dates in History. That's where
we get our categories. We'll get our first prize back out,
then we get the winning beginning. We're awake, Big Shoe's
on the radio. Good morning, Big shows on the radio.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
Get it out.
Speaker 3 (02:47):
We got a Happy Herd prize bag for you to win.
Happy Herd makes top quality attractings, minerals and feed for deer,
bear and hogs. If you're not using Happy Herd, better
hope your neighbors are they going a Happy Herd banner
the Big Show dot com interer coach JBB you get
ten percent off of checkout. Listen up here when you some.
It is May the seventh, our three Dates in History.
(03:11):
They were getting going right here. Nineteen fourteen, a number
of US Congressmen introduced and proposed National Mother's Day Holiday
for the second Sunday in May. And here we are
still celebrating our mamas.
Speaker 1 (03:27):
They agreed on that. Nineteen fourteen.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
Nineteen eighty six, John Rivers begin a late night TV
talk show on the Fox Network. Everybody agreed. It's stunk.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Talk.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
Then finally three, A man wanted for trafficking and possession
of cocaine was arrested when his parole officer spotted him
kissing his girlfriend in a live crowd shot displayed on
the scoreboard at the Cincinnati Reds game.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
The kiss cam that does the kiss cam.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
The suspect and his parole officer both intended the same game.
When the smooching couple was caught on the kiss cam,
parol officer and the police officer arrested the twenty four
year old man in his front row seat. Wowt's build
a front row All right, Well, there you go. There's
our categories one eight hundred big shows. You told free line.
(04:26):
Come on, we'll play out birds next.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Good morning. That's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 3 (04:56):
Worldly to you to win, to win, Randy stupid, No
put anything on that board.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
I read it. We've been here thirty minutes. Man, Come on,
all right now we're ready. It's Wednesday, and today's future
track for the Mexico Bill. We're running through the whole week. Okay,
you're prepared. I got it. The mom of constant sorrow.
Speaker 3 (05:22):
Search for keyword constant when you hit the bed box
at the Big Show dot com keyword constant?
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Did I say that?
Speaker 5 (05:31):
Ye?
Speaker 1 (05:32):
All right? Now we're ready, all right, cack up with me,
We work.
Speaker 7 (05:37):
Up.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Let's play up burst. It's the game that anyone can win.
John Boy Bully gave the prizes from the Big Prize
be let's go contested number one. This should be a.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
Lot of fun playing ups.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
Have a hurry up and gas. You love the best time.
You love a big shots.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
Let's say, Hey, Terry from Cottonwood, Alabama, we.
Speaker 5 (06:13):
Shot.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
Good morning Terry. Hey, John Boy Buddy, I'm awake. I'm
just waiting for abody to catch up with me.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
I understand.
Speaker 4 (06:32):
Right.
Speaker 3 (06:32):
Well, let's go ahead and get this win and begin
and tear you sound like we can get you through
these three categories.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Not much problem.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
I'll give it my bed shot.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
All right.
Speaker 3 (06:43):
Give us three gifts on Mother's Day, ready to go.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
Flowers, candy and cords bam.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Now give us three comedians who have had talk shows.
Ready to go, Jay Leno, John Rivers, Jimmy Fallon.
Speaker 1 (07:04):
All right, and for the win.
Speaker 3 (07:06):
Three things you see of a baseball game, Ready to go.
Speaker 4 (07:12):
Player's beats.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
How about some beer?
Speaker 3 (07:15):
Ah, Harry you got your happy heard price back head
down the cottonwood for you.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Good luck man, awesome, thank you, all right.
Speaker 3 (07:26):
Body batimenty hour top of your news.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
All right, hang right there.
Speaker 3 (07:36):
I found some more church bulletin blue per Oh boy,
I know, oh boy, good more than it's a big
(08:21):
show on the radio.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
For your Wednesday May seventh.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
Wellnody church bulletins sent out, and they do contain some
bloopers that are rather funny in my humble opinion.
Speaker 1 (08:36):
So I'm in the radio Hall.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Of Fame in my home state of North Carolina that
has anything to do with funny, you know, funny.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
Gi medic genius. Thank you, sir, so church bulletin bloopers.
Speaker 3 (08:52):
A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in
the church hall. Music will follow At the evening service tonight,
the servant topic will be what is Hell? Come early
and listen to our choir practice. Eight new choir robes
(09:13):
are currently needed due to the addition of several new
members and to the deterioration of some older ones. Scouts
are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled.
Proceeds will be used to cripple children. Please place your
donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you
(09:36):
won't remember.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
Oh cow gallop.
Speaker 3 (09:41):
The church will host an evening of fine dining, super
entertainment and gracious hostility. Hoot luck suppers only at five pm.
Prayer and medication to follow.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
Oh no, I'm not riding.
Speaker 3 (09:58):
The ladies of the church. We shall cast off clothing
of every kind. They may be seen in the basement
on Friday afternoon. You're talking this evening at seven pm.
There will be a hymn singing in the part across
from the church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to send.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Ladies.
Speaker 3 (10:17):
Bible study will be held Thursday morning at ten am.
All ladies are invited to lunch in the fellowship haul
after the BS is done. The pastor would appreciate it
if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their
electric girdles for the pancake breakfast.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Excellent Bill Well.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at seven pm.
Please use the back door. The eighth graders will be
presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement Friday at seven pm.
The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy Wade Watchers
will meet at seven pm in the First Presbyterian Church.
(10:59):
Please use large double door at the side entrance. The
Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan last Sunday,
I upped my pledge, up yours. The over sixties Choir
will be disbanded for the summer with the thanks of
(11:19):
the entire church. A song fest was hell at the
Methodist Church Wednesday, and finally the choir will meet at
the Larson House for fun and sinning.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Already there it is through five church blue for that's it.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
Deep, Good morning, big shows already see where you get connected.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
We're a temptation trailer here man, Hello, hey, this howait
all my life?
Speaker 4 (12:21):
Want to fight a b now?
Speaker 7 (12:23):
Man?
Speaker 1 (12:23):
Y'all? Boy better here wait here?
Speaker 4 (12:25):
That are you big on? Hurry? No driving, no talking, mouth, breathing,
knuckle dragon wall sitting he haul looking prais not much man?
Speaker 1 (12:34):
How you doing?
Speaker 4 (12:35):
No ty and nebwort went out last night and had
as a beer or twelve.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
Oh fellow rough huh well house Delbert.
Speaker 4 (12:44):
All right, stuff, don't buy the Delbort. That boy can
put it away all that long. Never break a sweat.
You should hit him down in Daytona Back in February.
Me and him are sitting in this little bar down
the street from the Adams work. One night it Seller
flies up next to Debor and says, that's a mighty
fine looking earn hard hat you got on. You wear
that so you can park in the handicapped spaces. Well, now,
(13:04):
as you can imagine, that's a real conversation star. Yeah, yeah,
I ain't want to get it out of hand there,
so I says, okay, let's all settle down here. Let
me buy us one. What you drinking there, buddy, he
says te Keeler ever heard of it? Devard says, yeah,
drunk a good bit of it too. Feller says, well,
by then, I'm from Texas. I bet you can't handle
(13:24):
as much as I can. Debard says, you gotta be
kidding me. I got you by a good forty pounds.
I bet you one hundred dollars I can match you
two for one. Whoa. Feller says, well, I had now
I been know to take them to a thing at
a time. So Debort lays one hundred dollar bill on
the bar and says, bring on the noise, Bring on
the pump and I mentioned it's a little bit less. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (13:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (13:47):
So this feller tells the bartender set up two shots.
He grabs one in each hand and goes bam bam,
and he says, tell you what, give me one more,
grabs the throw one bam, slams it down on the
bar and says, all right there, mister, two for one.
Let's see what you got. So the bartender lines up
six shots there on the bar in front of delbor
well Sin. His eyes got right big for a second.
(14:09):
Next thing you know, he gets up off he stool
walks out the door. Feller says, a wayman, where's head going?
I says, well, I reckon, he just stepped out to
get a breath of fresh air. Look out the front window.
Debort's headed off down the street. So Tex kindly smiles
at me and says, you, buddy's got the talking part
down too bad. He can't back it up. I says, well,
you got a mint six shots of tequila. That's a
(14:32):
mighty tall order. Text says, hey, it's his ideare I
didn't really think he'd go through with in no ways,
but one hundred dollars was too much to pass up.
So anyway, me and him sat there for about five minutes.
He finishes his drink, says, wow, A nice talking to you,
and reaches out for that hundred dollars on the bar
there just in a hand reaches out and grabs him
by the wrists. He says, hold on there, buddy, you
(14:52):
ain't won that money yet. We look up. It's Debor.
He's back. He says, is that bed still on? Tex
says sure not so. Bartender lines them up again. Debor
takes them a real deep breath, starts pounding down them.
Shots bam bam, bam, bam, bam bam, does all six
of them, wipes off his chin, gets right up in
(15:12):
Texas face and says, hell's your dad dead? A little
tax can't believe it. He pushes his cap back on
his head, says dad Burne's son, You tough. Debor says,
I told you so. Text pulls out his bill for
old Hans Debort five twenties and says, here you go, buddy.
He shakes his hand and walks on now the bar,
I says, Devart, that's pretty dang impressive. You okay? He says, yeah,
(15:34):
I think so. I says, well, let me ask you
something when you got up and left the bar, there
where did you go? And never says, well, six shots,
that's a bunch of tequila. I had to run down
to that bar next door to make sure I could
do it first. He's what he lacks in brain power,
he makes up in the livery flock. Hey, listen, men,
(15:55):
Jose Quervos fixing to go to work. You're gonna see
geb later on. Yeah, well, well you tell him. I said,
duh huh, hell know what you mean? Y'all came straight up.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
You more than everybody the big shows on the radio.
Still a lot more coming at you. Hey, hey listener,
my name is Man Folly. I ain't a motivational speaker.
I am thirty five years old.
Speaker 4 (16:25):
I am right.
Speaker 8 (16:26):
Divorced, and every morning I listen to young Boy and
Billy on the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
When I wake up in a van man river, go
on and laugh and leave the radio work. Good morning.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
This will be showing the radio man yesterday and money
been told about all the action of great state that
Texas had over the weekend with the PGA tournament. Was
got it thirty one hundred fallard time PGA record.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
Had the Texas race.
Speaker 3 (17:37):
Joey Logano co was back from being disqualified the week before.
Wait you do it down, and Joe, of course we
were dogging about something else. Oh yeah, game seven.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
Let's not forget that it happened. But oh boy, yeah, okay,
that's kind.
Speaker 5 (17:57):
Of a big deal there at the furry House.
Speaker 3 (18:00):
And you know, everything is bigger in Texas, even truck spills.
Did y'all hear about this? An eighteen wheeler traveling north
of Dallas last week overturned and spilled its entire hall
eight hundred thousand dollars worth of dimes.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
We're gonna need a butt of times. Well, let think
of next.
Speaker 3 (18:29):
The loose change was strewn all over the road and
the grassy shoulder and vesigator said the driver. The truck
veered off, rolled over, and the passenger were hurt and
taken to a hospital.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
They're gonna be all right.
Speaker 3 (18:42):
Meanwhile, traveling shut down crews had to get to work
on picking up eight million dimes.
Speaker 6 (18:49):
Yeah, oh, you should see some of the video coverage
from the news. I mean it was out in the
woods into the ditches and dimes.
Speaker 3 (18:58):
So it said, had large vacuums they were sucking some
up and then nevering to pick up. I mean it's
gonna be a sum that would be fun. Hunt to
get your kids.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
You do go out there where that happened.
Speaker 5 (19:11):
Yeah, would have metal detective find a dime?
Speaker 1 (19:13):
Yeah gosh yeah. But but in a case like that,
you're required by law to give it back. Yeah. Yeah,
we let me go help. It'll be fun.
Speaker 8 (19:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (19:22):
Yeah. If you'd be spotted if you tried to buy
something with a bag full of.
Speaker 3 (19:29):
Day eight million dimes filled on the hunt, it's crazy.
All right, Well we got we got ta entertainment news.
Let's see what's happening otherwise being entertained. The Big Show
rolls on Good Morning Big Shows on the radio. Coming up,
we play John Boy, Jebity, we always go to We
(19:49):
get a winter That means somebody get an assortment of
swag from World lawn Mowers, the best value zero turned
moores on the market. Got a three year unlimited hours
warning commercial. Kawasaki engines Heavy Dude to fabricated deck starting
at just twenty nine to nine to nine World Long,
Tough on grass, Easy on your wallet. Look for the
(20:09):
link at the Big Show dot com. Sen Me in
Action and my parody mode Grass had a book.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
Of branks range. All right, so proud hango, we'll play
more than minutes.
Speaker 3 (20:22):
Right now, it's time for Tator Taman news and here's
our girl, Marcy Tator Moran.
Speaker 5 (20:27):
Well, hello, hello, all. So I'm just gonna update you
on the whole Diddy thing. Okayy Diddy, Sean Puffy Coombs,
you know his At his final pre trial hearing, Sean
Diddy rejected a last chance plea deal.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Uh nope, nope, and.
Speaker 5 (20:44):
His trial on federal sex trafficking charges will start next Monday,
with jury selection from one hundred and fifty potential jurors.
Opening statements expected on May twelfth. Prosecutors claim that he
operated his business empire as a criminal enterprise. We know
that he supposedly coursed men and women into drug fueled,
freak off sex parties with the promise of helping their
(21:04):
showbiz aspirations. Did He also apparently threatened violence or to
end their careers to keep them compliant.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
So I hadn't really heard about the men deal? Is
that is that him?
Speaker 5 (21:17):
Yeah? Yeah, he's allegedly he coerced both men and women.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
Yeah, if you're asking, I mean to say it politely.
He swings both ways.
Speaker 5 (21:29):
Yeah, And there's an age issue also that is part
of that young.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
Does he like them young or all like them?
Speaker 5 (21:36):
He likes all ages?
Speaker 1 (21:38):
Does he swings all ways?
Speaker 5 (21:43):
All?
Speaker 7 (21:43):
Right?
Speaker 5 (21:44):
So the prosecutors predict that his trial could take up
to ten weeks according to People magazine. Now, jury selection,
as we said, just kicked off, and it's a madhouse
according to TMZ. And some people are getting paid just
to stand in lines for others to snag spot inside
the courthouse. So this isn't gonna be uh no, it's
(22:04):
not gonna be right. No, camera's not gonna be publicized.
So people are are trying to get their spots in
the courthouse. And so people who like I don't know,
need to go to work or go to bed, have
paid people up to thirty two dollars an hour to
hold their place in line so that they can get
a spot in the courthouse.
Speaker 1 (22:21):
So it's going to be drawings probably, you know the way.
Speaker 5 (22:24):
They no idea how they're going to do that there,
I mean I right now, they're they're they're they're worried
about getting twelve jurors and six and six alternates who
don't know anything about this trial.
Speaker 6 (22:36):
There are certain members of court and court pro seedings
that are that get seats automatically. I would imagine a
sure an artist.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
Would be on that list.
Speaker 5 (22:47):
Kim Kardashian in the news not because she did something,
but her nine year old son hijacked her Instagram account
to promote his new YouTube channel. They're getting younger and younger.
I thought there was age limits, but I guess not
for the U tube channel. Saint West is his name,
and he uh he went and got on her Instagram
that had three hundred and fifty seven million followers. Smart
(23:11):
kid and quote posted sub to Saints channel, so he
now has four thousand followers at is a YouTube account
four thousand. One of Kim's followers commented on his post, saying,
leave your mama phone.
Speaker 3 (23:28):
I've been trying to talk jagging to get on hacking
staffs and guys, you know, like put me on my
world law. More so, like about you know, one hundred
million people can give me mow and grass.
Speaker 5 (23:39):
Just post this for us, just one just you know.
Kim did not delete the post. She appears to approve
of his YouTube account, but last fall, Saint was forced
to deactivate his previous channel because he shared an anti
Kamala Harris mean.
Speaker 1 (23:55):
Oh, we can't have that.
Speaker 5 (23:56):
So it looks like there's evident piling in that Anna day.
Armis is serious about dating Tom Cruise.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
Love is in the air, all right.
Speaker 5 (24:09):
Here's her picture right here.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Kind of a pretty woman, no right, you know?
Speaker 5 (24:18):
And why are there rumors? Well, because they took a
rhemantic walk through London Park and celebrated her thirty seventh
birthday with a swanky dinner. So of course, of course
they're headed for the They're headed for the altar. So
but the previous day, the couple arrived in London via
helicopter with her two dogs. So apparently you know he's investing,
he's investing. There's also an anonymous source that told gossip
(24:42):
guru Rob Shooter that she's secretly studying scientology.
Speaker 1 (24:48):
Yeah, she's been.
Speaker 5 (24:49):
She's been taking intro courses and meeting with advisors. It
started just out as curiosity, but now she seems very engaged.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Oh yeah you might.
Speaker 5 (24:57):
You can see her in Ballerina. It's a on Wick
spinoff with appearances by Keano and Angelica Houston. So she's
gonna be leading that ballerina And uh, this could be love,
or this could be publicity because he's got his Mission
Impossible movie coming out Memorial Week Day.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
Week, hanging there, her two dogs, good helicopter rides.
Speaker 4 (25:19):
Could all be happening.
Speaker 5 (25:21):
That's all I got for you. Well, I got one
more thing for There's a high school senior named Chandler
Bing and he just committed to playing basketball for Vanderbilt
and Chandler Being's Chandler Being said last week quote, I
haven't watched Friends. My mom has seen the show. When
they were naming me, she wasn't even thinking about Matthew
Perry's character. You tell yourself that Chandler. Your name's Chandler Bing.
Speaker 7 (25:43):
She saw it.
Speaker 1 (25:45):
He doesn't realize that's the name of one of the
characters from Chandler. He was one of the guys.
Speaker 5 (25:52):
You just didn't care.
Speaker 1 (25:59):
Did you job? Good work, baby.
Speaker 3 (26:03):
Well, let's get us a winner. Let's play John BOYD Jeopardy.
Let's review yesterday's question. We found out in nineteen fifty
Nash became the first car company to offer this optional feature.
They installed it in forty thousand new cars, but nobody
would buy them till they took them out.
Speaker 5 (26:19):
What are seat belts?
Speaker 1 (26:21):
Seat belts.
Speaker 3 (26:22):
Indian less than a thousand cars were sold with them installed. Okay,
today's John Boy Jeopardy. When Superman first appeared in comic
books in nineteen thirty eight, he did not have this
now iconic superpower. Years later, animators requested it be added
for dramatic flare in cartoons and movie wow.
Speaker 5 (26:46):
What is changing his closing a phone book?
Speaker 1 (26:51):
He's kind of like to see that. I'm very happy
to see what y'all got.
Speaker 3 (26:54):
One eight hundred big show you told free line across America.
We played John Boy Jeopardy. Next Good Morning, It's a
(27:25):
big show on the radio. Roll into your Wednesday Home Day,
May to seven. Our feature track, win the Big Show,
bet Box.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
The mom of constant Sorrow. There's your key word, constant Dordon,
Mother's Day to Sunday.
Speaker 3 (27:39):
Hit the bedbox, app the Big Show dot com. Right now,
that's flave Yes live across America.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
It's John boyd Jeopardy and now your host.
Speaker 6 (27:50):
His iconic superpower the ability to read and instantly forget
humorous bloopers found in the church bulletins.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
He's John Boy.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
It's not I recognized it as they hated Kensley out
of Thomaston, Georgia, Good morning, Kensley, Good morning, hey baby, welcome.
All right, well, Kensley got the first shot at it
this morning. Let's see about Superman. When he first appeared
in comic books in nineteen thirty eight, he didn't have
(28:24):
this now iconic superpower. Years later, animators requested it be
added for a dramatic flare in cartoons and movies, and
to this day one of the things you think about
old Superman. What you got, Kinsley? Well, I reckon he
couldn't fly?
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Is that what you wrecked in? Kinsley?
Speaker 3 (28:47):
Superman could not fly? Well, let's see, yahyay, you.
Speaker 1 (29:01):
Know what he could do, Ginsley? He could jump? Yeah,
not a very intimidating superpower. Oh don't jump? All right? Well, Kinsley,
you got your.
Speaker 3 (29:15):
Big old swag pack from the world Lownmores. We'll get
it to you down.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
Thomas and Georgia appreciate you, baby.
Speaker 3 (29:22):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (29:24):
Sweet hang on, hang on here about Superman?
Speaker 3 (29:30):
Uh said, Okay, he couldn't fly until they said, hey man,
Superman's got a fly.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
Animators do this, so it did.
Speaker 3 (29:36):
Uh So Superman all of his superpowers right, quick, super strength,
super speed, enhanced leaping, super eyesight, telescopic and microscopic, superhering,
X ray vision, heat vision, power of flight, super freeze breath,
super smart's photographic memory, photographic photographic memory, telepathy, time travelpathy
(30:03):
telepathy time travel, super hypnotism, super stamina stamina, super healing factor,
and super ventriloquism.
Speaker 1 (30:20):
That's the dumbest one. The ability to throw his voice
very long distance.
Speaker 5 (30:27):
Super hooked on phonics.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
Yeah wow, some of those are hard to pronounce.
Speaker 3 (30:35):
Necessary to put super ah idea.
Speaker 5 (30:42):
Well, teopathic, you're super.
Speaker 3 (30:46):
Telepathy, telepathy if you're telepathic.
Speaker 7 (30:50):
And this is the award winning John Boy and Billy
(31:23):
Big Show, the South's number one export.
Speaker 3 (31:36):
It's time for dumb crook news, dumb church doorries, millie
for newspapers, wire services across Americas and and by you
the Big Show listener, and the address will follow this report.
Police in Garrisonville, Virginia arrested a cow for stealing milk
from a local walmart. Okay, it wasn't a real cow.
(31:58):
It was a guy in a cow suit. Oh, no
mansense who made off with twenty six gallons of milk
from the store. When does it say he left the
store and began handing out gallon jugs to people in
the parking lot.
Speaker 5 (32:12):
So he's like the robin Hood of cows was.
Speaker 3 (32:15):
It was last seen by store employees kimping down the
side walking his cowsuit.
Speaker 1 (32:21):
Moo moo, moo.
Speaker 3 (32:25):
Well he's responding to an unrelated call. Ran into the
suspect at a nearby McDonald's. He was back in people
clothed by them, but the cowsuit was recovered from the
man's car. Well, ah, utterly ridiculous.
Speaker 5 (32:37):
Killing people clothes.
Speaker 3 (32:41):
And Ocaloosa, Florida, man was arrested for visiting a local
strip club. The man had been banned for life from
Club fifty one over an incident back in February. When
they showed up again this month, the club's owner called
the cops. The man told police it was all a
big misunderstanding. He knew had been banned for life, but
the band was from Sammy's, a different local strip club.
(33:04):
You know, I get around so much it's hard to remember.
It was arrested for trespassing anyway, keen.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
One, you've seen them all well.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
Every woman in Melbourne, Australia was arrested for dui near
the police station. She told the arrestling officer. She had
decided to drive because she had just gotten a new
set of teeth and wanted to try him out in
a nearby KFC.
Speaker 1 (33:29):
Could not resist that one.
Speaker 3 (33:32):
A man in Bridgeport, Connecticut was arrested in connection with
the theft of a fifty gallon drum of gasoline. The
suspect dumped the contents and tried to sell the empty
drum to a scrap metal dealer. His asking price for
the drum sixty dollars value of the gasoline he dumped
out of it two hundred dollars.
Speaker 1 (33:51):
Probably doesn't keep up with the latest fear.
Speaker 3 (33:53):
Apparently, A pharmacist in pascal Goula, Mississippi, says the guy
who broke in was drug store doesn't know beans about
crime or drugs. The thief grabbed what he thought was
a large bottle of the prescription pain reliever Lord Tab,
but the drug store had been broken into several times
in recent months and Lord Tab was always eluded choice,
(34:15):
so the pharmacist replaced the pills and the bottle with
red kidney beans.
Speaker 1 (34:22):
I'm not getting a buzz at all here when I'm
getting regular. I got some gas. I hear they're good
for your heart.
Speaker 3 (34:31):
A nurse at a Minneapolis hospital has resigned and faces
criminal charges for stealing a file of IV pain killers
while at a patient at the hospital was undergoing kidney
stone surgery. When the victim complained about the pain, The
nurse reported that reportedly told him to man up, man.
Speaker 1 (34:54):
Man Ain't nothing funny about Kenney.
Speaker 3 (34:58):
A professor at George Is Washington University, was honored at
the halftime of a recent basketball game for his financial
generosity to the school, But the guest of honor didn't
make it to the end of the game. He was
thrown out of the arena in the second half or
harassing a referee over the quality of his officiating.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
So why don't they say money?
Speaker 3 (35:17):
Hit by class? And When an eighteen year old Massachusetts
college student got his laptop stolen, the computer savvy victim
called the cops, then decided to do a little high
tech detective work on his own. The student used a
remote access program to contact his laptop and search for
clues to the crime. One of the clues was a
(35:38):
video of the thief performing some pretty lame dance moves
to a hip hop track. The victim grabbed the video
and posted it on YouTube under the title don't steal
computers from people who know how to use computers. The
clip racked up seven hundred thousand hits along within the
rest warrant for the thief. The victim reports of the
(35:59):
thief posted an online apology begging him to take the
video down, which I'm not going to do. He's not
in a position to bargain. Well, dumb political news. President
Obama was recently presented with an award, but you probably
didn't hear about it on the news. That's because the
presentation was not on the White House schedule for the day.
(36:22):
There were no photos or press releases issued, and no
mention of the ceremony on the official White House website.
By the way, the award was an honor of the
President's commitment to transparency and openness with members.
Speaker 1 (36:35):
Of the press. He can't make us.
Speaker 3 (36:41):
And finally, the manager of a grocery store in the
British territory of Jersey admitted the store had overcharged a
customer by five British pounds that's about eight US dollars,
and he was issuing a refund. The customer says that
while weighing up the vegtivals, he was purchasing. The female
clerk had leaned over over too far, causing her sizeable
(37:02):
boobies to press.
Speaker 1 (37:03):
Down on the scale. I'll leave it alone. You got
dumb cook News.
Speaker 3 (37:14):
Mail to dumb cook News, John Boy Billey of Pillbox
seventy six sixty three Charlotte, NC two Egg two four one,
or email anybody but me at the Big Show dot com,
John William Dilly.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
That is a familiar voice.
Speaker 5 (37:30):
I mean you've heard that voice before, right, Actually, that
voice is heard every day, several times a day by
millions of Americans.
Speaker 1 (37:39):
Morning rad Yo, dumb right, Good morning, and it's a
(38:09):
big show on the radio. Oh yeah, let him in here.
Speaker 3 (38:15):
Well, our oldest fan is around there somewhere is first
stops always at free coffee and cozying up to the
snack girl.
Speaker 1 (38:21):
So hell here he is now, Welcome.
Speaker 3 (38:23):
Back to the Big Show. The man, the myth, the legend,
Nerve old team Wheeler.
Speaker 8 (38:28):
Well, Hey, John Boy, you almost got that right. I'm
not a myth, I'm a myster. I'm my mistake. You'll
be the first to know if I ever decide to
do that transition thing. So why will I be the
first to know? Well, hell, I need some women's clothing.
The triple x T shirts are yearn to make good dreads.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
Yeah there was a mom. So what are you out
about for today, nerve?
Speaker 8 (38:54):
Well, normally around this time of year, you know, I
being sprang and all, i'd be getting my my mower
blades sharpened or the tractor tires replaced. You got a
pretty big place out there, right, yeah, twenty steven acres,
all open land that's got to be tough to mow. Yeah,
well you used to be until I got my secret
weapon neighbor kid to do the mowing.
Speaker 1 (39:14):
No, sir, goats. Goats goats nature is lawnmower. They don't
take guys their batteries.
Speaker 8 (39:21):
You ain't got to feed them, and they don't make
a mesk. And it's a hoot watching them fire them
little butt berries out of there hind end like a
gottling gun. How many you got butt berries or goat goats?
Twenty seven one freechacre and brother man. Let me tell
you they get that job done well.
Speaker 3 (39:39):
But they do.
Speaker 1 (39:40):
So what made you decide to get goats?
Speaker 8 (39:42):
Well, I've always liked to goat. You don't goat got personality.
I'll never forget my first goat. My buddy Carlyle Fincher
and me. We's coming home from the beach and his
Mustang and we just had a big barbecue lunch and
Carlile's toot tunnel was getting the workout, and I was
cussing him out right and left about the smell, and
(40:02):
right about then, this this big old goat he stepped
right into the road and Carlyle hid it. Oh that's
not good, that's what the goat said, And I was upset.
I got out of that car and I went over
to check on him, and it was just knocked out,
but he was still hurting pretty good. I told Carlyle,
I said, now you come and help me, and we're
gonna put that goat in the back seat and I'm
(40:23):
gonna take him hold with me. Carlyle says, well, what
about that terrible stinking smell in my car? And I said, well, hell,
if it means that much to you, I guess I
could reach back there and hold his nose for him.
Speaker 1 (40:34):
So yeah, yeah, sure, did did you name it? Billy Vanilly?
They was popular back then. All right, Well, listen, i
I'm gonna get head out for about to eat with
a snack gwn. You got to keep your bread buttered.
Speaker 8 (40:48):
So well behave yourself, said John Boy. Well listen, you
keep your saddle oil and your gun greased, and holler.
Speaker 1 (40:55):
If and you need.
Speaker 3 (41:00):
Pass bag for you lessen thirty minutes from right now.
It's a big sholl o lett. Somebody better tamn it
than me, tell you than me all right.
Speaker 1 (41:12):
Time might be the Big Show that still freaking me
up at you. Whoa, it's you, Marcel. What am I
doing well?
Speaker 3 (41:19):
When I'm not hanging up on racing fat boy and
trying to cure Beds of her terminal blondness.
Speaker 8 (41:24):
I'm listening to my two favorite straight white Southern boys,
John Boy and Billie on the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (41:29):
Oh, Marcel, just stop. No, I won't tell Randy you
said hello.
That's Big show on the radio, John Bo Ben and Tyler.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Fellers ran to Jackie and you listening, Hi a pal,
You are listening to two of the funniest guys on
the radio and my fraternity brothers at the Raccoon Lodge,
John Boy and Philly on the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (00:18):
Are they funny? Are they funny? Oh? Hello, Jump, chump
(01:01):
chump jump, Spring time? Living is eat? Did you know that?
Speaker 3 (01:10):
I like mister Rubb got it little do y'all loving Adam?
There's a brand new days.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
You see what you've done?
Speaker 4 (01:23):
That thought?
Speaker 5 (01:24):
You're all taking a turn?
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Okay, that's it.
Speaker 1 (01:32):
National Day.
Speaker 3 (01:33):
He's got a bunch of them here on May seventh,
National Tourism Day, National Packaging Design Day, National Roast Leg
of Lamb Day, and his favorite dish. Today is National
Interpreter Appreciation Day, National Bike to School Day, National School
(01:54):
Nurse Day, the National paste Up Day. And when newspapers, magazines,
and catalogs were compiled by hand, and those that work
so tediously in their position.
Speaker 6 (02:08):
You know I was one of those people. No, yeah,
I worked for our local hometown newspaper. I was a
photographer and we did paste up and mock ups in
our dark room.
Speaker 1 (02:17):
How about that? Okay, well look at you all right.
So that was the interesting part of these national days.
So let's help go.
Speaker 3 (02:30):
To our three Saved up Dates in History. That's where
we get our categories. We'll get our first prize back out,
then we get the winning beginning. We're awake, Big Shoe's
on the radio. Good morning, Big shows on the radio.
Speaker 1 (02:46):
Get it out.
Speaker 3 (02:47):
We got a Happy Herd prize bag for you to win.
Happy Herd makes top quality attractings, minerals and feed for deer,
bear and hogs. If you're not using Happy Herd, better
hope your neighbors are they going a Happy Herd banner
the Big Show dot com interer coach JBB you get
ten percent off of checkout. Listen up here when you some.
It is May the seventh, our three Dates in History.
(03:11):
They were getting going right here. Nineteen fourteen, a number
of US Congressmen introduced and proposed National Mother's Day Holiday
for the second Sunday in May. And here we are
still celebrating our mamas.
Speaker 1 (03:27):
They agreed on that. Nineteen fourteen.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
Nineteen eighty six, John Rivers begin a late night TV
talk show on the Fox Network. Everybody agreed. It's stunk.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Talk.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
Then finally three, A man wanted for trafficking and possession
of cocaine was arrested when his parole officer spotted him
kissing his girlfriend in a live crowd shot displayed on
the scoreboard at the Cincinnati Reds game.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
The kiss cam that does the kiss cam.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
The suspect and his parole officer both intended the same game.
When the smooching couple was caught on the kiss cam,
parol officer and the police officer arrested the twenty four
year old man in his front row seat. Wowt's build
a front row All right, Well, there you go. There's
our categories one eight hundred big shows. You told free line.
(04:26):
Come on, we'll play out birds next.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
Good morning. That's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 3 (04:56):
Worldly to you to win, to win, Randy stupid, No
put anything on that board.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
I read it. We've been here thirty minutes. Man, Come on,
all right now we're ready. It's Wednesday, and today's future
track for the Mexico Bill. We're running through the whole week. Okay,
you're prepared. I got it. The mom of constant sorrow.
Speaker 3 (05:22):
Search for keyword constant when you hit the bed box
at the Big Show dot com keyword constant?
Speaker 1 (05:31):
Did I say that?
Speaker 5 (05:31):
Ye?
Speaker 1 (05:32):
All right? Now we're ready, all right, cack up with me,
We work.
Speaker 7 (05:37):
Up.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
Let's play up burst. It's the game that anyone can win.
John Boy Bully gave the prizes from the Big Prize
be let's go contested number one. This should be a.
Speaker 3 (05:54):
Lot of fun playing ups.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
Have a hurry up and gas. You love the best time.
You love a big shots.
Speaker 3 (06:04):
Let's say, Hey, Terry from Cottonwood, Alabama, we.
Speaker 5 (06:13):
Shot.
Speaker 3 (06:18):
Good morning Terry. Hey, John Boy Buddy, I'm awake. I'm
just waiting for abody to catch up with me.
Speaker 1 (06:27):
I understand.
Speaker 4 (06:32):
Right.
Speaker 3 (06:32):
Well, let's go ahead and get this win and begin
and tear you sound like we can get you through
these three categories.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Not much problem.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
I'll give it my bed shot.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
All right.
Speaker 3 (06:43):
Give us three gifts on Mother's Day, ready to go.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
Flowers, candy and cords bam.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
Now give us three comedians who have had talk shows.
Ready to go, Jay Leno, John Rivers, Jimmy Fallon.
Speaker 1 (07:04):
All right, and for the win.
Speaker 3 (07:06):
Three things you see of a baseball game, Ready to go.
Speaker 4 (07:12):
Player's beats.
Speaker 1 (07:14):
How about some beer?
Speaker 3 (07:15):
Ah, Harry you got your happy heard price back head
down the cottonwood for you.
Speaker 1 (07:23):
Good luck man, awesome, thank you, all right.
Speaker 3 (07:26):
Body batimenty hour top of your news.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
All right, hang right there.
Speaker 3 (07:36):
I found some more church bulletin blue per Oh boy,
I know, oh boy, good more than it's a big
(08:21):
show on the radio.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
For your Wednesday May seventh.
Speaker 3 (08:25):
Wellnody church bulletins sent out, and they do contain some
bloopers that are rather funny in my humble opinion.
Speaker 1 (08:36):
So I'm in the radio Hall.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Of Fame in my home state of North Carolina that
has anything to do with funny, you know, funny.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
Gi medic genius. Thank you, sir, so church bulletin bloopers.
Speaker 3 (08:52):
A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in
the church hall. Music will follow At the evening service tonight,
the servant topic will be what is Hell? Come early
and listen to our choir practice. Eight new choir robes
(09:13):
are currently needed due to the addition of several new
members and to the deterioration of some older ones. Scouts
are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled.
Proceeds will be used to cripple children. Please place your
donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you
(09:36):
won't remember.
Speaker 1 (09:36):
Oh cow gallop.
Speaker 3 (09:41):
The church will host an evening of fine dining, super
entertainment and gracious hostility. Hoot luck suppers only at five pm.
Prayer and medication to follow.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
Oh no, I'm not riding.
Speaker 3 (09:58):
The ladies of the church. We shall cast off clothing
of every kind. They may be seen in the basement
on Friday afternoon. You're talking this evening at seven pm.
There will be a hymn singing in the part across
from the church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to send.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
Ladies.
Speaker 3 (10:17):
Bible study will be held Thursday morning at ten am.
All ladies are invited to lunch in the fellowship haul
after the BS is done. The pastor would appreciate it
if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their
electric girdles for the pancake breakfast.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Excellent Bill Well.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at seven pm.
Please use the back door. The eighth graders will be
presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement Friday at seven pm.
The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy Wade Watchers
will meet at seven pm in the First Presbyterian Church.
(10:59):
Please use large double door at the side entrance. The
Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan last Sunday,
I upped my pledge, up yours. The over sixties Choir
will be disbanded for the summer with the thanks of
(11:19):
the entire church. A song fest was hell at the
Methodist Church Wednesday, and finally the choir will meet at
the Larson House for fun and sinning.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Already there it is through five church blue for that's it.
Speaker 3 (11:44):
Deep, Good morning, big shows already see where you get connected.
Speaker 1 (12:14):
We're a temptation trailer here man, Hello, hey, this howait
all my life?
Speaker 4 (12:21):
Want to fight a b now?
Speaker 7 (12:23):
Man?
Speaker 1 (12:23):
Y'all? Boy better here wait here?
Speaker 4 (12:25):
That are you big on? Hurry? No driving, no talking, mouth, breathing,
knuckle dragon wall sitting he haul looking prais not much man?
Speaker 1 (12:34):
How you doing?
Speaker 4 (12:35):
No ty and nebwort went out last night and had
as a beer or twelve.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
Oh fellow rough huh well house Delbert.
Speaker 4 (12:44):
All right, stuff, don't buy the Delbort. That boy can
put it away all that long. Never break a sweat.
You should hit him down in Daytona Back in February.
Me and him are sitting in this little bar down
the street from the Adams work. One night it Seller
flies up next to Debor and says, that's a mighty
fine looking earn hard hat you got on. You wear
that so you can park in the handicapped spaces. Well, now,
(13:04):
as you can imagine, that's a real conversation star. Yeah, yeah,
I ain't want to get it out of hand there,
so I says, okay, let's all settle down here. Let
me buy us one. What you drinking there, buddy, he
says te Keeler ever heard of it? Devard says, yeah,
drunk a good bit of it too. Feller says, well,
by then, I'm from Texas. I bet you can't handle
(13:24):
as much as I can. Debard says, you gotta be
kidding me. I got you by a good forty pounds.
I bet you one hundred dollars I can match you
two for one. Whoa. Feller says, well, I had now
I been know to take them to a thing at
a time. So Debort lays one hundred dollar bill on
the bar and says, bring on the noise, Bring on
the pump and I mentioned it's a little bit less. Yeah.
Speaker 5 (13:47):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (13:47):
So this feller tells the bartender set up two shots.
He grabs one in each hand and goes bam bam,
and he says, tell you what, give me one more,
grabs the throw one bam, slams it down on the
bar and says, all right there, mister, two for one.
Let's see what you got. So the bartender lines up
six shots there on the bar in front of delbor
well Sin. His eyes got right big for a second.
(14:09):
Next thing you know, he gets up off he stool
walks out the door. Feller says, a wayman, where's head going?
I says, well, I reckon, he just stepped out to
get a breath of fresh air. Look out the front window.
Debort's headed off down the street. So Tex kindly smiles
at me and says, you, buddy's got the talking part
down too bad. He can't back it up. I says, well,
you got a mint six shots of tequila. That's a
(14:32):
mighty tall order. Text says, hey, it's his ideare I
didn't really think he'd go through with in no ways,
but one hundred dollars was too much to pass up.
So anyway, me and him sat there for about five minutes.
He finishes his drink, says, wow, A nice talking to you,
and reaches out for that hundred dollars on the bar
there just in a hand reaches out and grabs him
by the wrists. He says, hold on there, buddy, you
(14:52):
ain't won that money yet. We look up. It's Debor.
He's back. He says, is that bed still on? Tex
says sure not so. Bartender lines them up again. Debor
takes them a real deep breath, starts pounding down them.
Shots bam bam, bam, bam, bam bam, does all six
of them, wipes off his chin, gets right up in
(15:12):
Texas face and says, hell's your dad dead? A little
tax can't believe it. He pushes his cap back on
his head, says dad Burne's son, You tough. Debor says,
I told you so. Text pulls out his bill for
old Hans Debort five twenties and says, here you go, buddy.
He shakes his hand and walks on now the bar,
I says, Devart, that's pretty dang impressive. You okay? He says, yeah,
(15:34):
I think so. I says, well, let me ask you
something when you got up and left the bar, there
where did you go? And never says, well, six shots,
that's a bunch of tequila. I had to run down
to that bar next door to make sure I could
do it first. He's what he lacks in brain power,
he makes up in the livery flock. Hey, listen, men,
(15:55):
Jose Quervos fixing to go to work. You're gonna see
geb later on. Yeah, well, well you tell him. I said,
duh huh, hell know what you mean? Y'all came straight up.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
You more than everybody the big shows on the radio.
Still a lot more coming at you. Hey, hey listener,
my name is Man Folly. I ain't a motivational speaker.
I am thirty five years old.
Speaker 4 (16:25):
I am right.
Speaker 8 (16:26):
Divorced, and every morning I listen to young Boy and
Billy on the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (16:32):
When I wake up in a van man river, go
on and laugh and leave the radio work. Good morning.
Speaker 3 (17:18):
This will be showing the radio man yesterday and money
been told about all the action of great state that
Texas had over the weekend with the PGA tournament. Was
got it thirty one hundred fallard time PGA record.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
Had the Texas race.
Speaker 3 (17:37):
Joey Logano co was back from being disqualified the week before.
Wait you do it down, and Joe, of course we
were dogging about something else. Oh yeah, game seven.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
Let's not forget that it happened. But oh boy, yeah, okay,
that's kind.
Speaker 5 (17:57):
Of a big deal there at the furry House.
Speaker 3 (18:00):
And you know, everything is bigger in Texas, even truck spills.
Did y'all hear about this? An eighteen wheeler traveling north
of Dallas last week overturned and spilled its entire hall
eight hundred thousand dollars worth of dimes.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
We're gonna need a butt of times. Well, let think
of next.
Speaker 3 (18:29):
The loose change was strewn all over the road and
the grassy shoulder and vesigator said the driver. The truck
veered off, rolled over, and the passenger were hurt and
taken to a hospital.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
They're gonna be all right.
Speaker 3 (18:42):
Meanwhile, traveling shut down crews had to get to work
on picking up eight million dimes.
Speaker 6 (18:49):
Yeah, oh, you should see some of the video coverage
from the news. I mean it was out in the
woods into the ditches and dimes.
Speaker 3 (18:58):
So it said, had large vacuums they were sucking some
up and then nevering to pick up. I mean it's
gonna be a sum that would be fun. Hunt to
get your kids.
Speaker 1 (19:09):
You do go out there where that happened.
Speaker 5 (19:11):
Yeah, would have metal detective find a dime?
Speaker 1 (19:13):
Yeah gosh yeah. But but in a case like that,
you're required by law to give it back. Yeah. Yeah,
we let me go help. It'll be fun.
Speaker 8 (19:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 5 (19:22):
Yeah. If you'd be spotted if you tried to buy
something with a bag full of.
Speaker 3 (19:29):
Day eight million dimes filled on the hunt, it's crazy.
All right, Well we got we got ta entertainment news.
Let's see what's happening otherwise being entertained. The Big Show
rolls on Good Morning Big Shows on the radio. Coming up,
we play John Boy, Jebity, we always go to We
(19:49):
get a winter That means somebody get an assortment of
swag from World lawn Mowers, the best value zero turned
moores on the market. Got a three year unlimited hours
warning commercial. Kawasaki engines Heavy Dude to fabricated deck starting
at just twenty nine to nine to nine World Long,
Tough on grass, Easy on your wallet. Look for the
(20:09):
link at the Big Show dot com. Sen Me in
Action and my parody mode Grass had a book.
Speaker 1 (20:15):
Of branks range. All right, so proud hango, we'll play
more than minutes.
Speaker 3 (20:22):
Right now, it's time for Tator Taman news and here's
our girl, Marcy Tator Moran.
Speaker 5 (20:27):
Well, hello, hello, all. So I'm just gonna update you
on the whole Diddy thing. Okayy Diddy, Sean Puffy Coombs,
you know his At his final pre trial hearing, Sean
Diddy rejected a last chance plea deal.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Uh nope, nope, and.
Speaker 5 (20:44):
His trial on federal sex trafficking charges will start next Monday,
with jury selection from one hundred and fifty potential jurors.
Opening statements expected on May twelfth. Prosecutors claim that he
operated his business empire as a criminal enterprise. We know
that he supposedly coursed men and women into drug fueled,
freak off sex parties with the promise of helping their
(21:04):
showbiz aspirations. Did He also apparently threatened violence or to
end their careers to keep them compliant.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
So I hadn't really heard about the men deal? Is
that is that him?
Speaker 5 (21:17):
Yeah? Yeah, he's allegedly he coerced both men and women.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
Yeah, if you're asking, I mean to say it politely.
He swings both ways.
Speaker 5 (21:29):
Yeah, And there's an age issue also that is part
of that young.
Speaker 1 (21:35):
Does he like them young or all like them?
Speaker 5 (21:36):
He likes all ages?
Speaker 1 (21:38):
Does he swings all ways?
Speaker 5 (21:43):
All?
Speaker 7 (21:43):
Right?
Speaker 5 (21:44):
So the prosecutors predict that his trial could take up
to ten weeks according to People magazine. Now, jury selection,
as we said, just kicked off, and it's a madhouse
according to TMZ. And some people are getting paid just
to stand in lines for others to snag spot inside
the courthouse. So this isn't gonna be uh no, it's
(22:04):
not gonna be right. No, camera's not gonna be publicized.
So people are are trying to get their spots in
the courthouse. And so people who like I don't know,
need to go to work or go to bed, have
paid people up to thirty two dollars an hour to
hold their place in line so that they can get
a spot in the courthouse.
Speaker 1 (22:21):
So it's going to be drawings probably, you know the way.
Speaker 5 (22:24):
They no idea how they're going to do that there,
I mean I right now, they're they're they're they're worried
about getting twelve jurors and six and six alternates who
don't know anything about this trial.
Speaker 6 (22:36):
There are certain members of court and court pro seedings
that are that get seats automatically. I would imagine a
sure an artist.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
Would be on that list.
Speaker 5 (22:47):
Kim Kardashian in the news not because she did something,
but her nine year old son hijacked her Instagram account
to promote his new YouTube channel. They're getting younger and younger.
I thought there was age limits, but I guess not
for the U tube channel. Saint West is his name,
and he uh he went and got on her Instagram
that had three hundred and fifty seven million followers. Smart
(23:11):
kid and quote posted sub to Saints channel, so he
now has four thousand followers at is a YouTube account
four thousand. One of Kim's followers commented on his post, saying,
leave your mama phone.
Speaker 3 (23:28):
I've been trying to talk jagging to get on hacking
staffs and guys, you know, like put me on my
world law. More so, like about you know, one hundred
million people can give me mow and grass.
Speaker 5 (23:39):
Just post this for us, just one just you know.
Kim did not delete the post. She appears to approve
of his YouTube account, but last fall, Saint was forced
to deactivate his previous channel because he shared an anti
Kamala Harris mean.
Speaker 1 (23:55):
Oh, we can't have that.
Speaker 5 (23:56):
So it looks like there's evident piling in that Anna day.
Armis is serious about dating Tom Cruise.
Speaker 1 (24:04):
Love is in the air, all right.
Speaker 5 (24:09):
Here's her picture right here.
Speaker 1 (24:13):
Kind of a pretty woman, no right, you know?
Speaker 5 (24:18):
And why are there rumors? Well, because they took a
rhemantic walk through London Park and celebrated her thirty seventh
birthday with a swanky dinner. So of course, of course
they're headed for the They're headed for the altar. So
but the previous day, the couple arrived in London via
helicopter with her two dogs. So apparently you know he's investing,
he's investing. There's also an anonymous source that told gossip
(24:42):
guru Rob Shooter that she's secretly studying scientology.
Speaker 1 (24:48):
Yeah, she's been.
Speaker 5 (24:49):
She's been taking intro courses and meeting with advisors. It
started just out as curiosity, but now she seems very engaged.
Speaker 1 (24:55):
Oh yeah you might.
Speaker 5 (24:57):
You can see her in Ballerina. It's a on Wick
spinoff with appearances by Keano and Angelica Houston. So she's
gonna be leading that ballerina And uh, this could be love,
or this could be publicity because he's got his Mission
Impossible movie coming out Memorial Week Day.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
Week, hanging there, her two dogs, good helicopter rides.
Speaker 4 (25:19):
Could all be happening.
Speaker 5 (25:21):
That's all I got for you. Well, I got one
more thing for There's a high school senior named Chandler
Bing and he just committed to playing basketball for Vanderbilt
and Chandler Being's Chandler Being said last week quote, I
haven't watched Friends. My mom has seen the show. When
they were naming me, she wasn't even thinking about Matthew
Perry's character. You tell yourself that Chandler. Your name's Chandler Bing.
Speaker 7 (25:43):
She saw it.
Speaker 1 (25:45):
He doesn't realize that's the name of one of the
characters from Chandler. He was one of the guys.
Speaker 5 (25:52):
You just didn't care.
Speaker 1 (25:59):
Did you job? Good work, baby.
Speaker 3 (26:03):
Well, let's get us a winner. Let's play John BOYD Jeopardy.
Let's review yesterday's question. We found out in nineteen fifty
Nash became the first car company to offer this optional feature.
They installed it in forty thousand new cars, but nobody
would buy them till they took them out.
Speaker 5 (26:19):
What are seat belts?
Speaker 1 (26:21):
Seat belts.
Speaker 3 (26:22):
Indian less than a thousand cars were sold with them installed. Okay,
today's John Boy Jeopardy. When Superman first appeared in comic
books in nineteen thirty eight, he did not have this
now iconic superpower. Years later, animators requested it be added
for dramatic flare in cartoons and movie wow.
Speaker 5 (26:46):
What is changing his closing a phone book?
Speaker 1 (26:51):
He's kind of like to see that. I'm very happy
to see what y'all got.
Speaker 3 (26:54):
One eight hundred big show you told free line across America.
We played John Boy Jeopardy. Next Good Morning, It's a
(27:25):
big show on the radio. Roll into your Wednesday Home Day,
May to seven. Our feature track, win the Big Show,
bet Box.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
The mom of constant Sorrow. There's your key word, constant Dordon,
Mother's Day to Sunday.
Speaker 3 (27:39):
Hit the bedbox, app the Big Show dot com. Right now,
that's flave Yes live across America.
Speaker 1 (27:46):
It's John boyd Jeopardy and now your host.
Speaker 6 (27:50):
His iconic superpower the ability to read and instantly forget
humorous bloopers found in the church bulletins.
Speaker 1 (28:00):
He's John Boy.
Speaker 3 (28:03):
It's not I recognized it as they hated Kensley out
of Thomaston, Georgia, Good morning, Kensley, Good morning, hey baby, welcome.
All right, well, Kensley got the first shot at it
this morning. Let's see about Superman. When he first appeared
in comic books in nineteen thirty eight, he didn't have
(28:24):
this now iconic superpower. Years later, animators requested it be
added for a dramatic flare in cartoons and movies, and
to this day one of the things you think about
old Superman. What you got, Kinsley? Well, I reckon he
couldn't fly?
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Is that what you wrecked in? Kinsley?
Speaker 3 (28:47):
Superman could not fly? Well, let's see, yahyay, you.
Speaker 1 (29:01):
Know what he could do, Ginsley? He could jump? Yeah,
not a very intimidating superpower. Oh don't jump? All right? Well, Kinsley,
you got your.
Speaker 3 (29:15):
Big old swag pack from the world Lownmores. We'll get
it to you down.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
Thomas and Georgia appreciate you, baby.
Speaker 3 (29:22):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (29:24):
Sweet hang on, hang on here about Superman?
Speaker 3 (29:30):
Uh said, Okay, he couldn't fly until they said, hey man,
Superman's got a fly.
Speaker 1 (29:33):
Animators do this, so it did.
Speaker 3 (29:36):
Uh So Superman all of his superpowers right, quick, super strength,
super speed, enhanced leaping, super eyesight, telescopic and microscopic, superhering,
X ray vision, heat vision, power of flight, super freeze breath,
super smart's photographic memory, photographic photographic memory, telepathy, time travelpathy
(30:03):
telepathy time travel, super hypnotism, super stamina stamina, super healing factor,
and super ventriloquism.
Speaker 1 (30:20):
That's the dumbest one. The ability to throw his voice
very long distance.
Speaker 5 (30:27):
Super hooked on phonics.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
Yeah wow, some of those are hard to pronounce.
Speaker 3 (30:35):
Necessary to put super ah idea.
Speaker 5 (30:42):
Well, teopathic, you're super.
Speaker 3 (30:46):
Telepathy, telepathy if you're telepathic.
Speaker 7 (30:50):
And this is the award winning John Boy and Billy
(31:23):
Big Show, the South's number one export.
Speaker 3 (31:36):
It's time for dumb crook news, dumb church doorries, millie
for newspapers, wire services across Americas and and by you
the Big Show listener, and the address will follow this report.
Police in Garrisonville, Virginia arrested a cow for stealing milk
from a local walmart. Okay, it wasn't a real cow.
(31:58):
It was a guy in a cow suit. Oh, no
mansense who made off with twenty six gallons of milk
from the store. When does it say he left the
store and began handing out gallon jugs to people in
the parking lot.
Speaker 5 (32:12):
So he's like the robin Hood of cows was.
Speaker 3 (32:15):
It was last seen by store employees kimping down the
side walking his cowsuit.
Speaker 1 (32:21):
Moo moo, moo.
Speaker 3 (32:25):
Well he's responding to an unrelated call. Ran into the
suspect at a nearby McDonald's. He was back in people
clothed by them, but the cowsuit was recovered from the
man's car. Well, ah, utterly ridiculous.
Speaker 5 (32:37):
Killing people clothes.
Speaker 3 (32:41):
And Ocaloosa, Florida, man was arrested for visiting a local
strip club. The man had been banned for life from
Club fifty one over an incident back in February. When
they showed up again this month, the club's owner called
the cops. The man told police it was all a
big misunderstanding. He knew had been banned for life, but
the band was from Sammy's, a different local strip club.
(33:04):
You know, I get around so much it's hard to remember.
It was arrested for trespassing anyway, keen.
Speaker 1 (33:09):
One, you've seen them all well.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
Every woman in Melbourne, Australia was arrested for dui near
the police station. She told the arrestling officer. She had
decided to drive because she had just gotten a new
set of teeth and wanted to try him out in
a nearby KFC.
Speaker 1 (33:29):
Could not resist that one.
Speaker 3 (33:32):
A man in Bridgeport, Connecticut was arrested in connection with
the theft of a fifty gallon drum of gasoline. The
suspect dumped the contents and tried to sell the empty
drum to a scrap metal dealer. His asking price for
the drum sixty dollars value of the gasoline he dumped
out of it two hundred dollars.
Speaker 1 (33:51):
Probably doesn't keep up with the latest fear.
Speaker 3 (33:53):
Apparently, A pharmacist in pascal Goula, Mississippi, says the guy
who broke in was drug store doesn't know beans about
crime or drugs. The thief grabbed what he thought was
a large bottle of the prescription pain reliever Lord Tab,
but the drug store had been broken into several times
in recent months and Lord Tab was always eluded choice,
(34:15):
so the pharmacist replaced the pills and the bottle with
red kidney beans.
Speaker 1 (34:22):
I'm not getting a buzz at all here when I'm
getting regular. I got some gas. I hear they're good
for your heart.
Speaker 3 (34:31):
A nurse at a Minneapolis hospital has resigned and faces
criminal charges for stealing a file of IV pain killers
while at a patient at the hospital was undergoing kidney
stone surgery. When the victim complained about the pain, The
nurse reported that reportedly told him to man up, man.
Speaker 1 (34:54):
Man Ain't nothing funny about Kenney.
Speaker 3 (34:58):
A professor at George Is Washington University, was honored at
the halftime of a recent basketball game for his financial
generosity to the school, But the guest of honor didn't
make it to the end of the game. He was
thrown out of the arena in the second half or
harassing a referee over the quality of his officiating.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
So why don't they say money?
Speaker 3 (35:17):
Hit by class? And When an eighteen year old Massachusetts
college student got his laptop stolen, the computer savvy victim
called the cops, then decided to do a little high
tech detective work on his own. The student used a
remote access program to contact his laptop and search for
clues to the crime. One of the clues was a
(35:38):
video of the thief performing some pretty lame dance moves
to a hip hop track. The victim grabbed the video
and posted it on YouTube under the title don't steal
computers from people who know how to use computers. The
clip racked up seven hundred thousand hits along within the
rest warrant for the thief. The victim reports of the
(35:59):
thief posted an online apology begging him to take the
video down, which I'm not going to do. He's not
in a position to bargain. Well, dumb political news. President
Obama was recently presented with an award, but you probably
didn't hear about it on the news. That's because the
presentation was not on the White House schedule for the day.
(36:22):
There were no photos or press releases issued, and no
mention of the ceremony on the official White House website.
By the way, the award was an honor of the
President's commitment to transparency and openness with members.
Speaker 1 (36:35):
Of the press. He can't make us.
Speaker 3 (36:41):
And finally, the manager of a grocery store in the
British territory of Jersey admitted the store had overcharged a
customer by five British pounds that's about eight US dollars,
and he was issuing a refund. The customer says that
while weighing up the vegtivals, he was purchasing. The female
clerk had leaned over over too far, causing her sizeable
(37:02):
boobies to press.
Speaker 1 (37:03):
Down on the scale. I'll leave it alone. You got
dumb cook News.
Speaker 3 (37:14):
Mail to dumb cook News, John Boy Billey of Pillbox
seventy six sixty three Charlotte, NC two Egg two four one,
or email anybody but me at the Big Show dot com,
John William Dilly.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
That is a familiar voice.
Speaker 5 (37:30):
I mean you've heard that voice before, right, Actually, that
voice is heard every day, several times a day by
millions of Americans.
Speaker 1 (37:39):
Morning rad Yo, dumb right, Good morning, and it's a
(38:09):
big show on the radio. Oh yeah, let him in here.
Speaker 3 (38:15):
Well, our oldest fan is around there somewhere is first
stops always at free coffee and cozying up to the
snack girl.
Speaker 1 (38:21):
So hell here he is now, Welcome.
Speaker 3 (38:23):
Back to the Big Show. The man, the myth, the legend,
Nerve old team Wheeler.
Speaker 8 (38:28):
Well, Hey, John Boy, you almost got that right. I'm
not a myth, I'm a myster. I'm my mistake. You'll
be the first to know if I ever decide to
do that transition thing. So why will I be the
first to know? Well, hell, I need some women's clothing.
The triple x T shirts are yearn to make good dreads.
Speaker 1 (38:48):
Yeah there was a mom. So what are you out
about for today, nerve?
Speaker 8 (38:54):
Well, normally around this time of year, you know, I
being sprang and all, i'd be getting my my mower
blades sharpened or the tractor tires replaced. You got a
pretty big place out there, right, yeah, twenty steven acres,
all open land that's got to be tough to mow. Yeah,
well you used to be until I got my secret
weapon neighbor kid to do the mowing.
Speaker 1 (39:14):
No, sir, goats. Goats goats nature is lawnmower. They don't
take guys their batteries.
Speaker 8 (39:21):
You ain't got to feed them, and they don't make
a mesk. And it's a hoot watching them fire them
little butt berries out of there hind end like a
gottling gun. How many you got butt berries or goat goats?
Twenty seven one freechacre and brother man. Let me tell
you they get that job done well.
Speaker 3 (39:39):
But they do.
Speaker 1 (39:40):
So what made you decide to get goats?
Speaker 8 (39:42):
Well, I've always liked to goat. You don't goat got personality.
I'll never forget my first goat. My buddy Carlyle Fincher
and me. We's coming home from the beach and his
Mustang and we just had a big barbecue lunch and
Carlile's toot tunnel was getting the workout, and I was
cussing him out right and left about the smell, and
(40:02):
right about then, this this big old goat he stepped
right into the road and Carlyle hid it. Oh that's
not good, that's what the goat said, And I was upset.
I got out of that car and I went over
to check on him, and it was just knocked out,
but he was still hurting pretty good. I told Carlyle,
I said, now you come and help me, and we're
gonna put that goat in the back seat and I'm
(40:23):
gonna take him hold with me. Carlyle says, well, what
about that terrible stinking smell in my car? And I said, well, hell,
if it means that much to you, I guess I
could reach back there and hold his nose for him.
Speaker 1 (40:34):
So yeah, yeah, sure, did did you name it? Billy Vanilly?
They was popular back then. All right, Well, listen, i
I'm gonna get head out for about to eat with
a snack gwn. You got to keep your bread buttered.
Speaker 8 (40:48):
So well behave yourself, said John Boy. Well listen, you
keep your saddle oil and your gun greased, and holler.
Speaker 1 (40:55):
If and you need.
Speaker 3 (41:00):
Pass bag for you lessen thirty minutes from right now.
It's a big sholl o lett. Somebody better tamn it
than me, tell you than me all right.
Speaker 1 (41:12):
Time might be the Big Show that still freaking me
up at you. Whoa, it's you, Marcel. What am I
doing well?
Speaker 3 (41:19):
When I'm not hanging up on racing fat boy and
trying to cure Beds of her terminal blondness.
Speaker 8 (41:24):
I'm listening to my two favorite straight white Southern boys,
John Boy and Billie on the Big Show.
Speaker 1 (41:29):
Oh, Marcel, just stop. No, I won't tell Randy you
said hello.
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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