October 11, 2023 • 37 mins
(pt 1 of 2) On today's Big Show, John Boy recaps the Braves game in true play-by-play fashion.. - The Mayor of Dismal Seepage has big plans for the weekend.. - Rabbi Myron Bergstein Reviews Expendables 4.. - Sherman Pratt, the Big Show Brat gives a kid’s take on Professional Wrestling.. - and we all sing along with Pinkard and Bowden as they perform the Weenie Whacker song..
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Good morning, Thissious Connery Sean Connery. And you might think
that I'm just another sophisticated yet rugged Scottish movie star,
and you'd be right.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
What's my secret?
Speaker 1 (00:13):
The truth is I can't start my day without listening
to the Big Show with John Boy and Billy. Trust me,
they're a lot funnier than doctor Noan blofeld.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Ooh ig a doodle doo up and on.
Speaker 4 (01:04):
It is Wednesday, October eleventh, twenty twenty three. And look
how you gotta find out? Please to bring you the
important information to start your day. Along with my side Kickbilly.
What was my front kick, Tater? My kick?
Speaker 5 (01:27):
Yeah, that's him. This is not gonna go well for me.
Speaker 4 (01:32):
And the guy with the topper cable something my kick head.
Speaker 5 (01:38):
Something that rhymes of that, why you've kicked me in
the head? Plenty on.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
Is Jaggie our curry in the corner, and Andrew was
on the big screen in the booth around that corner.
We're all here, honestly in the same room.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
Okay, we'll good man, how's everybody?
Speaker 6 (01:57):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (01:58):
So I middle little week?
Speaker 6 (01:59):
Good?
Speaker 4 (02:00):
All right, Well, let's see what we got to celebrate
if we choose to it's a free country. It's national
take your parents to lunch Day. Oh, National sausage Pizza Day,
National Fossil Day, Nation'll bring your teddy bear to work
or school day? Yeah, that'll go well. And it's the
(02:26):
perfect time to have the National Stop Bullying Day. Randy
shows up to school with his teddy bear. Tell him
to stop bullying. National Emergency Nurses Day. Well, we have
a lot of appreciation for nurses. I know, I have
a lot more being around. See what they do. Man,
ain't that some kissing? We don't kissing nurse if if
(02:49):
you know them all right, I'm gonna stop right there.
Don't ruin Emergency Nurses Day. National General Pulaski Memorial Day.
Speaker 5 (02:59):
Say somebody something you know.
Speaker 4 (03:02):
This day is set aside in the US to recognize
Kasimir Pulaski. He was a Polish immigrant, one of Pillars
people over two centuries ago. He joined the Continental Army
and soon rose to the ranks to brigadier general. He'd
been around a bit, Yes, timeless, get to know General
(03:24):
Pulaski by pronouncing that Polish name.
Speaker 7 (03:27):
Oh, he's usually pulaskilas last Kilosky.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
Look, I kind of resent that you kind of making
fun of him, and you went Swedish there at the end. Well,
we got three days in thisory that we got saved
up right here, because that'll be our categories for Altburska.
The first prize pack out. You know, we'd like to
get the winning beginning early big shows on a radio,
(03:51):
Good morning big shows on a radio. First prize pack
is one of them. Bullsnot prize pack who it's liquoring bullsnot?
About one hundred twenty dollars were the bulls not cleaning products?
Check them out the truck stops across America. Click on
that bull snot banner from r info when you hit
the Big Show dot com. Look at our three dates
in history where we got our category.
Speaker 5 (04:15):
I should have had the paye turned to it. I
was so excited for you.
Speaker 4 (04:17):
Anymorry about General PULASKI I'm friends, you know your kicks.
Speaker 5 (04:24):
I need somebody spit my fingers or the You just
asked for someone to lick your fingers, so got it.
I gotta thank you, Martia.
Speaker 7 (04:33):
You've seen your responded immediately.
Speaker 5 (04:35):
Well all we wanted. Marcia actually got up and ran
over here.
Speaker 7 (04:38):
Bless your heart, tight and licking all the way around.
Speaker 4 (04:41):
Yeah, let's see here. October eleventh, nineteen seventy two, Michael
Galen of Carnes, Australia said the world banana eating record
he down sixty three bananas in ten minutes nineteen seven
teventy three. One year later, two Mississippi dock workers claimed
(05:04):
they were kidnapped by aliens aboard a UFO. The men
described the visitors from spaces, silver skinned, eyeless creatures with
slits for mouths and three weird appendages where nose and
ears should have been.
Speaker 7 (05:20):
They come booking in boogey, Hey go booging in loog.
Speaker 4 (05:24):
Mad Do you think they were just making something up
because they were luckily up?
Speaker 7 (05:28):
Well, this is the first we're hearing about it.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
Yeah, seventy three, all right, And finally, on this day
in eighty seven, the world's largest pizza was baked. The
pizza was cut and the ninety four thousand, two hundred
and forty eight slices.
Speaker 5 (05:43):
That's a big piece. Well, there you go.
Speaker 4 (05:45):
There's a Category's one eight hundred big shows you told
Free Line across America.
Speaker 5 (05:49):
Come on play out birds next.
Speaker 4 (06:17):
Good morning, it's a big show on the radio for you.
Wednesday October eleventh, Hey y'all listen to us now Huntsville, Alabama.
My favorite Southern rock band, Jive Mother Mary, gonna be
headlining Day two a Throttlefest this Saturday, single day weekend
Passes can be had at Throttle Fess HSV dot com,
(06:41):
keyboe with Jive Mother Mary's latest releases tour dates on Facebook,
in Instagram.
Speaker 5 (06:46):
I will get it.
Speaker 4 (06:48):
At Jive Mother Mary and at Jive Moothermary dot com
and right now, mey time, me man, wake up.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
Let's play uppers.
Speaker 7 (07:01):
It's the game that anyone can win.
Speaker 5 (07:05):
John Boy Billy to give the prizes from the big
Prize Beer. Let's go he contested number one.
Speaker 3 (07:14):
This should really be a lot.
Speaker 4 (07:16):
Of fun playing uppers.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
Have a hurry up and guest time you love the
best time. You have a big shots.
Speaker 4 (07:26):
Let's say, hey Chris from Moundsville, West Virginia, we have shots.
Good morning Chris, Good morning, Hey Bodie, welcome, Hi man.
We all awake, were pulling for you. Let's get you
(07:48):
through these categories and get that bulls not due.
Speaker 5 (07:50):
You're right all right?
Speaker 3 (07:52):
Sound good right man?
Speaker 4 (07:53):
In five seconds, three fruits you peel ready go apple, orange, banana, bam.
And now we need three things you see it a
doc Ready.
Speaker 3 (08:09):
Go fish, duck, fish and coal.
Speaker 4 (08:13):
Alright, and for the win, three pizza toppings ready go.
Speaker 3 (08:20):
Sauce, cheese, pepperoni.
Speaker 5 (08:22):
Bam.
Speaker 4 (08:24):
Yeah, man, hit it poor and we know why they
did that huge pizzas National Sausage pizza day to day.
Look at us putting things together, right, Chris, you jumping
in here, winning you one hundred and twenty dollars worth
of bulls not cleaning products.
Speaker 5 (08:39):
Congratulations.
Speaker 3 (08:41):
All right, thanks John boy. Hey, first time caller. Can
I get them new? You got one?
Speaker 1 (08:47):
All right?
Speaker 3 (08:47):
How about a shout out?
Speaker 4 (08:49):
I go ahead, all right to my wife Danielle, my
three kids.
Speaker 5 (08:54):
All right, we're gonna help get them up alright.
Speaker 4 (09:01):
As Christ and his papes in Moundsville, West Virginia winning
on the big show, bottom of the Guy wear on
top of your news twenty minute, the mayor from dismal
sepet right here in the studio, hang around anyway, Good morning,
(09:57):
it's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 5 (09:59):
Wrote it through you Wednesday.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
Then Braves played tonight and anybody see the Braves game
Monday night. Jaggie, you did high five to Jaggie Man
one to one the Phillies. The Braves are playing the
Phillies the postseason, likes the best out of five games.
Speaker 5 (10:22):
All right, this on right.
Speaker 4 (10:22):
Here, So the Braves best record in baseball have been
killing it. As a matter of fact, what I'm telling you.
Bob Ibach joined us about that Ronald Lacuna Junior commemorative
thirty four inch black bat, the full size celebrating his
in the seventy forty club limited edition. They might be
sold out. They only made two and twenty three of them,
(10:46):
five dollars each bat sold. You know, always donate to
the foundation. This is the Atlanta Braves Foundation. So you
might want to check see if they got in he left.
You can order to click on the Niko sports banner
at the Big Show dot com. You can call eight
hundred three four five twenty eight sixty eight. But anyway, yeah,
about the game that breaks, I hope they're not because
that was a great So anyway, so if they were
(11:10):
lost this game in Philly, they hadn't led in the
game like the first game stunk stunk it up. Yeah, thros,
and it even looked like it to late in the game.
And here they come in. They come back Austin Riley
home run take the lead by one. I think like
that was the bottom of the eighth. In the top
of the ninth and Phillies man, oh what's his name?
(11:32):
Not Turner, but the other one mckillleens. He was on
first there it is the tying run in the smack
one long Harris center field that goes back and jumps,
makes a great catching the fence turns around. Heaves at
the second base because what's his name's going to second,
so they.
Speaker 7 (11:51):
Except for the player's names, you're doing the next.
Speaker 4 (11:54):
Then they miss the cutoff man. It goes back and Riley,
who plays third base, picked it up. A rock at
the first base got him before he got back. A
double play like eight five three ft away, a huge
double play. Braves win the game on that play, as
(12:15):
also Solis down up one to one, and they play
again this evening. I think game times around five o'clock.
Speaker 7 (12:22):
All right, and catchy reenact tomorrow morning right here.
Speaker 8 (12:27):
On except for Wesson's name and good morning.
Speaker 5 (12:57):
That's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 4 (12:59):
There's always something exciting happening in beautiful dismal seep in
South Carolina, and he's here to tell us all about it.
I mean he's really here in person in our studio,
the Mayor himself, the Honorable Merwin Q Fiddleswoop. Good morning,
mister Mayor.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Good morning John Boy and all your wonderful listeners.
Speaker 4 (13:20):
Well we finally meet face to face, your exactly as
I pictured you.
Speaker 5 (13:25):
So are you? And may I say?
Speaker 2 (13:27):
Yikes?
Speaker 5 (13:29):
So what brings you to the city?
Speaker 2 (13:31):
My new expense account and my new government issued car.
Speaker 9 (13:34):
Ah.
Speaker 4 (13:35):
One of the perks of being the top dog man.
It doesn't hurt that I'm related to most of the
city council. Well isn't that a conflict of interest? And
I'm taking to the road to spread the word about
our big weekend coming up. It's the Dismal Seepage Happy
Keister Festival. Wow an Easter festival sounds fun up.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
Time to change the batteries in your earpiece there, mister
van Winkle. Keaster Festival, A time to celebrate the beauty
of the booty. Ah, nothing wrong with that, you know,
I'm down with it, John Boy. The weekend starts with
a big parade down Main Street. We've got the dancing
Winona's leading the way, shaking that famous Judd junk. The
(14:20):
Steve Harvey High School Marching Band will be playing Baby
Got Back, Fat Bottom Girls, Big Booty, and many other
dairy air related ditties. The Shriners are backed by popular demand.
The rear bumpers of their little cars will be sporting
big foam rubber butts. And you know someone's gonna get
rear ended. And you're talking about the cars, right, We've
(14:43):
got all sorts of salute the Majestic American Patuit. Everyone
signing up for the Big Serena Williams butt Pong competition
sponsored by Doctor Duff's Butt Lifts and Crack Shortening butt Pong.
Speaker 4 (15:02):
You know, you try to get the ping pong balls
into the cups. It's kind of like beer pong, but
you shoot him out of her well, you know, is
that really a thing? Yeah, all the kids are doing it,
you square. The local artists are lining up for the
posterior painting contest, using the fleshiest part of the human
(15:23):
body for a spectacular canvas sponsored by the Nick Cercy
Rectel Waxing Boutique and Justified Memorahilia and Porium.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
Don't forget like he says he's talent.
Speaker 5 (15:36):
Anything for the kids and.
Speaker 4 (15:38):
How John boy, everything from Whoope cushion musical chairs to
pin the tail in the Kardashian.
Speaker 5 (15:46):
I know you're gonna have some grate eats.
Speaker 4 (15:48):
It's the Big Smoky Butt's Cookoff, five pounds of Boston butts,
prepared by a host of chefs, hosted by Carl the
Crook himself. You mean Carl the Cook No, No, Carl
the Crook. He's a recently escaped felon who used to
break into barbecue restaurants and cook that pork. Right and
after the big closing night concert by Men at Twerk,
(16:10):
Will crown Miss Bdonka donc let me guess you're one
of the judges. We're not just celebrating aesthetic beauty of
the gluteus maximus. We're also giving a big salute to
digestive wellness featuring the launch of fiddle Swoops, fiber waffles
(16:31):
made with thirty different kinds of fiber and premium probiotics.
Remember if you need the poop, it's fiddle scoop. Hey,
you know that might be a good campaign slogan for you.
Speaker 5 (16:48):
No fs, hands or buds.
Speaker 4 (16:52):
Come on down to the Big Dismal Sea Bitch Happy
Keister Festival it's the living end you.
Speaker 2 (16:58):
Square what go now?
Speaker 10 (17:02):
Go now?
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Okay, Good morning, Stan Higgins here.
Speaker 11 (17:08):
Nothing makes my day like a chance to pipe in
on John Boy and Billy here in the Big Show.
But I don't come here just to see them. I'm
not a gay. I come here for the eye. Candy
Bab's Jackie and theater and Thanny's got a sweet tooth.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
How is that?
Speaker 5 (17:58):
Good morning on the radio. We don't Humma do your Homeday?
Speaker 4 (18:03):
October eleven, little man miss October.
Speaker 3 (18:08):
He don't troke a little bit?
Speaker 4 (18:09):
Feeling good here and the Paul win Thorpe won't.
Speaker 5 (18:13):
Mind Joe about John Boys wonderful than giveaway? Well, don't
give away number.
Speaker 4 (18:18):
Eighty four that hardcover books Becoming film Aloo, My Journey
to Hollywood, Maybury and Beyond, plus an autograph post it
note f and go author Jim Clark.
Speaker 11 (18:26):
Yeah, we go on.
Speaker 5 (18:27):
We'll give that away Friday, beginning of the last hour
of the Big Show.
Speaker 4 (18:30):
The way we do it, make sure you name an
hat you on't have the Big Show dot com. Good morning,
Big Show's on the radio, coming up? We played John
boyde every day we go. Do we get a winner?
Somebody will get a hat, t shirt, tumbler and a
twenty five dollars gas card from Law Tigers that'll fill
up your motorcycle. Lord Tigers motorcycle lawyers who ride representing
(18:52):
injured drivers for over two decades. With Lord Tigers, you
never ride alone. Click on the link when you go
to the Big Show dot Com. Hang on playboard in minutes.
Right now, it's time for Tayman News. And here's that girl,
Marcy Taytor Moren.
Speaker 12 (19:08):
You said, keep me updated on the trailer news.
Speaker 7 (19:13):
I did so, as we recapped.
Speaker 12 (19:15):
Two weeks ago, the Travis Kelchi frenzy began, and two
weeks ago Taylor Swift accepted his invitation to watch the
NFL football game. Well last weekend, she was not there
at the Oh.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
Yes, and he had a birthday and she wasn't.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
At the party.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
Oh but.
Speaker 7 (19:35):
This means she's got enough for the album already.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
She doesn't need him.
Speaker 12 (19:40):
Since two weeks ago, though Travis and Taylor among the
top three most searched public figures in the United States,
Beyonce is number three.
Speaker 5 (19:52):
Oh she is hot.
Speaker 7 (19:55):
Hey, you know that that movie thing that she's doing
of Taylor doing of her tour, They say that Beyonce
is studying that very carefully. She thinks she could do
that too.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
You get fifty of the ticket sales.
Speaker 12 (20:10):
Very interesting. Travis also in the news on Entertainment tonight,
they're reporting that he feels fatigued from the non stop
Travis Kelsey coverage.
Speaker 5 (20:22):
Like defensive coverage or like media the media.
Speaker 12 (20:26):
He's like, he understands that, you know, their their popular personalities.
Speaker 4 (20:31):
I imagine there's a lot of trash talking on the
football field, you know, if there is anyway I'm serious,
this is my job.
Speaker 7 (20:39):
Secret listing that job is not for you.
Speaker 12 (20:41):
We've decided, he said about the media on his podcast
with his brother quote, it's fun when they show who's
at the game. It adds to the atmosphere. But at
the same time they're overdoing it, especially my situation. Let's
dilated down.
Speaker 5 (20:56):
A little bit. Okay, tough out there.
Speaker 12 (21:03):
So you know about all the conflict going on in
Israel and the well, Bruno Mars had to cancel his
Saturday night show in Tel Aviv. They got him on
a plane and got him out and now so Bruto
Mars is home safe. Courted to Entertainment tonight, Seinfeld could
Seinfeld be about to get a new ending twenty five
(21:25):
years after the beloved sitcom.
Speaker 5 (21:27):
Well, they owe it to us.
Speaker 7 (21:29):
Well, that's part of the story of it, is that right.
Speaker 12 (21:32):
This surprising news came during Seinfeld's recent stand up set
at the Wang Theater in Boston. He told the audience
he had a little secret regarding the sitcom's divisive finale.
It's in response to a fan who asked whether he
liked oldernally.
Speaker 7 (21:48):
Now he wants you to do the voice when you're
when you're quoting him, though.
Speaker 12 (21:51):
Which voice would you like me to do?
Speaker 13 (21:54):
Seinfeld have a little secret, Jerry, He says, Well, I
have a little secret for you.
Speaker 7 (22:06):
I can't do it.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
You great, keep going, but.
Speaker 5 (22:10):
I can't really I can't.
Speaker 7 (22:12):
Still, Okay, you do it.
Speaker 4 (22:15):
How about why don't you just tell us the story?
Speaker 5 (22:20):
Y'all shut up.
Speaker 12 (22:21):
I can hear it in my head, but I can't.
Speaker 5 (22:26):
I can't do it.
Speaker 12 (22:27):
Yeah, Well, the secret is he can't tell anybody, but
something is going to happen that has to do with
the ending, and it hasn't happened yet.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
So and just what you're thinking about it annoyed as.
Speaker 12 (22:39):
You, and he said, and just what you are thinking
about Larry David and I have also been thinking about it.
So you'll see, we'll see.
Speaker 5 (22:51):
One as it would be.
Speaker 3 (22:55):
Idiots.
Speaker 4 (22:55):
Where did I leave them in prison? That would count
with them being older, you know, when they get out
or something.
Speaker 5 (23:02):
What about that? Huh. I'm already working on it. You
Larry David on the phone day.
Speaker 12 (23:06):
He said, what you're thinking, we're thinking.
Speaker 3 (23:13):
Sounds like your royal wedding.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
Boys, let's pretty need to think about it.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
And well, that's all right.
Speaker 5 (23:24):
The fuck, that's good.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
That's good.
Speaker 5 (23:26):
Thank you very much for that's a wonderful report. Look,
I go the.
Speaker 6 (23:31):
AI.
Speaker 5 (23:32):
Let's get us a winner.
Speaker 4 (23:34):
Let's play John boyd Jeopardy review yesterday's question. You probably
noticed in nearly all commercial airlines, gents are painted white,
and for good reasons. White paint reflects heat, requires less maintenance,
but it also saves the airline of money on every flight.
Speaker 7 (23:48):
This is why, because white paint weighs less.
Speaker 4 (23:51):
That is it, man, dark darker colors way more and
you gotta do more codes than everything we found out.
All right, there we go today's John Boy Jeopardy. According
to the experts, twenty minutes is the ideal duration for
this activity. Anymore or less can have negative results.
Speaker 5 (24:12):
What is cooking a twenty minute egg? What y'all got one?
Eight hundred bigs?
Speaker 4 (24:18):
So you told free line? Across America, we played John
Boy Jeopardy. Coming up your close. It's John Boy and
(24:52):
Billy and the game. Now, how is that closing?
Speaker 5 (24:57):
Because my superfly is never mind?
Speaker 3 (25:01):
Okay, let's wait.
Speaker 7 (25:05):
Yes, across America, heats young ch I now your host
the man of which the big in Big Show and
the hump in hump Day.
Speaker 3 (25:17):
He is Jock Lord.
Speaker 4 (25:22):
As they headed Jay out of Mobile, Alabama, good morning.
Speaker 5 (25:29):
To you, Jay Ooh who are sir? Hear you talking?
I'm glad you made it in here, buddy. Everything all right,
yes sir, yes sir, I'm gonna get some cool weather.
Speaker 4 (25:45):
We know, Dad man, I did well, Jay, you got
first shot at this John Boy Jeopardy this morning. According
to the experts, twenty minutes. That's the ideal duration for
this activity. Anymore or less can't have negative reason.
Speaker 5 (26:01):
What you got something? I'm gonver do in im Ont
says exercise?
Speaker 4 (26:08):
Okay, well, let's say is it exercise?
Speaker 5 (26:15):
I mean they say it what?
Speaker 4 (26:20):
Well, but they do say that what how many minutes
twenty thirty a day exercise at least they'd like for
you to do at least twenty minutes, at least twenty Jay, Well,
let's just start at ten and then see what happens there, buddy.
Speaker 5 (26:32):
Yeah, all right, my man, call me back. Let me
know how you go. Have a great.
Speaker 3 (26:39):
Day's going to have it?
Speaker 4 (26:40):
Yeah?
Speaker 9 (26:41):
You do?
Speaker 12 (26:41):
Now?
Speaker 4 (26:41):
All right, all right, buddy, let's go to Russ. He's
in Lancaster, South Carolina. Good morning, Russ, Hey, good morning.
Speaker 5 (26:49):
How's everybody doing? Hey man, we are doing good?
Speaker 3 (26:52):
All right?
Speaker 5 (26:53):
Got you here, Russ? Your shot at it?
Speaker 3 (26:55):
Bunny?
Speaker 4 (26:56):
It is not exercise twenty minutes ideal duration for what? Well,
my mind was going one direction?
Speaker 6 (27:05):
And yeah, is it? Is it a nap?
Speaker 5 (27:10):
What is going the other direction?
Speaker 4 (27:12):
If you're let's say no, we're gonna communicate.
Speaker 5 (27:18):
No, let's yeah, let's draw it out.
Speaker 2 (27:19):
Since the connection is so good.
Speaker 5 (27:22):
I don't think that's a great idea.
Speaker 4 (27:23):
Okay, show us nap. Yes, this his mind was going
one way. I wanted to know what was going the
other way. Let's just drop it, all right, Russ, you win, buddy,
big old long Tiger's prize back down Laster for you.
Speaker 5 (27:44):
Awesome you guys.
Speaker 4 (27:46):
I really appreciate you guys. Thank you so much.
Speaker 5 (27:48):
Glad you want man? Hang on? How's jump out? Cut
you up on your news? Ride on the other side,
by God.
Speaker 4 (28:00):
Time capsule over this October eleven, I ain't gonna wait.
Speaker 9 (28:35):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one exports.
Speaker 14 (28:50):
Listen out front. I love my self. I hate my body.
I used to be felt and I'm mul blob. I
love to eat it thord of my hobby. If it's
not tied down, it's going bye bye.
Speaker 11 (29:11):
I can eat anything else.
Speaker 14 (29:15):
When I think about food, I weigh myself.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
Oh I canny anything else? Oh no, oh no, oh
hell just this one last doughnut?
Speaker 11 (29:28):
Oh hello, Babs. Yes, unfortunately it's that bad.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
How bad? I'll tell you how bad.
Speaker 11 (29:34):
You know how I dry my hair in the morning,
I step on the scale, lean over, and the breeze
from the spinning dial drives my hair.
Speaker 2 (29:40):
I'll tell you that right now. I've tried a diet.
Love what happened.
Speaker 11 (29:47):
I had to go on two diets at once because
I wasn't getting enough to eat on one.
Speaker 6 (29:51):
Oh.
Speaker 11 (29:51):
I tried the lap band the probably once that didn't
have enough material to go around my lap?
Speaker 2 (29:59):
What's that?
Speaker 11 (30:00):
Your your friend Tiffany had good luck with the diet? Really,
do tell the garlic diet?
Speaker 5 (30:06):
What is that?
Speaker 11 (30:08):
You don't have to lose weight? You just looked in
her from a distance. Ah, will crafted you know better
than to do me like that when I'm hurt.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
I told the seventh Fleet.
Speaker 11 (30:20):
Okay, go make your potty appointment. I'll stay here and
stare at the biscuits.
Speaker 2 (30:24):
There she goes, tippy toads.
Speaker 11 (30:27):
Where she stops is where she goes, and she's gone,
We're bab She thinks a gastric bypass is a French detour.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
The Big Show felt speaking.
Speaker 11 (30:44):
I'm going to help you, Oh, Marcel, Oh, I'm so disappointed.
Speaker 2 (30:49):
I can't seem to lose a pound.
Speaker 11 (30:52):
I swear this John Boy is just not getting it done.
What oh I call my diet John Boy?
Speaker 2 (31:00):
Neither one of them works.
Speaker 11 (31:01):
Oh oh, I just can't hide it anymore. I went
to the men's store the other day. When I walked in,
they directed me to the Billy Gardell section.
Speaker 4 (31:11):
WHOA.
Speaker 11 (31:12):
What's really embarrassing is the shirt I bought was so big,
the tags had made in the USA and China and
Algeria and Pakistan.
Speaker 2 (31:23):
You get the idea. Oh, you're very nice. I'm not
fooling anyone anymore. I used to deny it.
Speaker 11 (31:29):
I tell people I was still wearing stuff I were
in high school, but I didn't tell them that it
was earrings.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
And heels for it. Oh, it was awful.
Speaker 11 (31:39):
The other day at the airport, the TSA guys detained me,
saying they found two hundred pounds of.
Speaker 2 (31:44):
Crack in my pants.
Speaker 11 (31:47):
At Gaye Bengo, they call me battleship because it takes
three tugs to get me into a slip.
Speaker 2 (31:56):
And the bonus. I got a sunburn over the weekend.
All the kids in the neighborhood yelled, hey, Koli.
Speaker 11 (32:03):
I took some paper thoughts a booger branch ranch for
John Boy to sign. I dropped my pen and when
I bent over to pick it up, milk truck money said, Lord,
it looks like two pigs fighting over a milk done.
Not a confidence booster. Even my shrink isn't sympathetic. I
told him I'm uncomfortable in my body. He said, probably
because it's so crowded. It's a terrible doctor. He's the
(32:28):
one that gave me the advice of standing naked in
front of the mirror before eating.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
FYI that it's.
Speaker 11 (32:33):
Frowned upon at the Golden Corral. Oh boy, here comes
the bab's a lama ding dong. I gotta go and
Marcel Dust.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
Hello, my angel, ready to roll? What's that? Big bat?
Speaker 11 (32:51):
Girl down the hall had a diet tip that's interesting,
ironic but interesting.
Speaker 2 (32:57):
Let's hear it. Uh huh she.
Speaker 11 (32:59):
Said, to lose weight, go to the paint store. Wow,
how is that supposed to work?
Speaker 5 (33:06):
Ah?
Speaker 2 (33:06):
Of course you can get thinner there?
Speaker 11 (33:09):
To me, the most obvious thing, Oh my head, Give
me a beefy and of goodies to the Minnie.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
Coopers carry out straight people, John Boy and Dilly.
Speaker 3 (33:21):
Next week, I'm going on a.
Speaker 6 (33:23):
Diet Good morning radio, dumb right, Good morning.
Speaker 4 (33:54):
That's a big show on the radio. Let's welcome back Rabbi,
myron Berg.
Speaker 2 (33:58):
Steam me homies. What's happening John Boyeme and Billy Collyam?
Speaker 5 (34:04):
How's he going?
Speaker 3 (34:05):
Rebbi?
Speaker 10 (34:05):
Yes, a cute trying to phrase their gum shoe straight dope?
I mean, can you even say that anymore? Don't you
have to give equal time to the gatoes. I don't
understand the world no more.
Speaker 5 (34:18):
No, Well, who's your friend there?
Speaker 2 (34:20):
Eh, that's no friend, that's my great grandson. Smoothy.
Speaker 5 (34:24):
How's he going? Smoothly? Hey?
Speaker 10 (34:26):
Look up from your phone and the dollars speaking? Tell
you your little turt. Oh, he's a mess. I gotta take
him to the Orthodonis today. Get his braces looked at.
Does he need him tighten or loosen?
Speaker 5 (34:38):
Look?
Speaker 10 (34:39):
If the next words are your mouta, I reckon. I
could do that for a lot less.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
I'm leaving.
Speaker 10 (34:44):
Nah, he's just going in for cleaning. He got into
the Halloween candy early, and the dentist has the pressure
washed the camels off your pants.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
I spend enough fortune on that, your little t.
Speaker 5 (34:56):
What did you wind up seeing?
Speaker 6 (34:58):
Well?
Speaker 10 (34:58):
I wanted to go see that sequelizer movie, but it
was sold out, so I went to see The Expandables
Fall Expendable, No, no expandables.
Speaker 2 (35:07):
They all got fat.
Speaker 10 (35:10):
I always liked these movies, lots of action and wise
cracking good times. This time the guys I after some
spendrick with a knook and it's all hands on deck
to save the oil.
Speaker 5 (35:20):
Who sounds great? How's a cast.
Speaker 10 (35:22):
Oh, fantastic Rockies in there. The transportatos in there. The
blonde Russian guy from the Rocky movies is in there.
They got some no faces.
Speaker 2 (35:32):
They even got a girl Ooo nice to look at.
Can't act kind.
Speaker 10 (35:40):
Of like Tita here, that's fair, But there was a
new face that I love. He's a great character actor.
I watched him his entire career, and he never disappoints.
The great actor Andy Divine, Andy Garcia. Andy Devine was
an old Tommy cowboy actor you're thinking of Andy gar.
Speaker 2 (36:01):
I thought that was the sheriff with the big ears
in the stupid deputy.
Speaker 5 (36:04):
That was Andy Griffith.
Speaker 10 (36:07):
I thought that was the guy who did all those
Christmas specials with his ex wife that killed that skier.
Speaker 5 (36:12):
That's Andy Williams.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
I thought that was that albino guy who painted soup cans.
Speaker 5 (36:17):
That was Andy Warhol.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
I thought that was that the black and white bear
who hung out with that crazy woodpecker.
Speaker 5 (36:25):
That's Andy Pander.
Speaker 2 (36:28):
I thought that was the guy who used to be
behind the glass and now he's on the monitor.
Speaker 5 (36:32):
That's Andy Abdall.
Speaker 2 (36:35):
So who the hell am I thinking of?
Speaker 5 (36:37):
Andy Garcia?
Speaker 2 (36:38):
I wish they were still a Mayberry. All the guys
the single and all the bronze were horny.
Speaker 5 (36:45):
So what do you think?
Speaker 2 (36:46):
I called them hot dames and no one got brightened.
Speaker 10 (36:50):
Andy and Bonnie the movie, Oh hey, I give it
fun to half Yarmicha's great fun. They entertaining nobody, telling
you to save the planet, making sure everyone is represented
on screen.
Speaker 2 (37:05):
I don't know.
Speaker 10 (37:06):
Maybe that's what floats your book. Maybe that kind of
stuff is what you look for in the film. And
listen up, snowflake, go stick your nose up. Hollywood's took us.
That's all they got these days. You exactly what's wrong
with the world. Dictate to everybody what they should and
shouldn't like, filling up movies with your talking points in
your propaganda.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
Good for your loser.
Speaker 10 (37:31):
Well, I guess some of it, wouldn't he nothing? God
bless I say, peace be with you. Idiot can see
him at night.
Speaker 2 (37:40):
It's cheaper. Oh,
Good morning, Thissious Connery Sean Connery. And you might think
that I'm just another sophisticated yet rugged Scottish movie star,
and you'd be right.
Speaker 2 (00:11):
What's my secret?
Speaker 1 (00:13):
The truth is I can't start my day without listening
to the Big Show with John Boy and Billy. Trust me,
they're a lot funnier than doctor Noan blofeld.
Speaker 3 (00:22):
Ooh ig a doodle doo up and on.
Speaker 4 (01:04):
It is Wednesday, October eleventh, twenty twenty three. And look
how you gotta find out? Please to bring you the
important information to start your day. Along with my side Kickbilly.
What was my front kick, Tater? My kick?
Speaker 5 (01:27):
Yeah, that's him. This is not gonna go well for me.
Speaker 4 (01:32):
And the guy with the topper cable something my kick head.
Speaker 5 (01:38):
Something that rhymes of that, why you've kicked me in
the head? Plenty on.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
Is Jaggie our curry in the corner, and Andrew was
on the big screen in the booth around that corner.
We're all here, honestly in the same room.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
Okay, we'll good man, how's everybody?
Speaker 6 (01:57):
Yeah?
Speaker 5 (01:58):
So I middle little week?
Speaker 6 (01:59):
Good?
Speaker 4 (02:00):
All right, Well, let's see what we got to celebrate
if we choose to it's a free country. It's national
take your parents to lunch Day. Oh, National sausage Pizza Day,
National Fossil Day, Nation'll bring your teddy bear to work
or school day? Yeah, that'll go well. And it's the
(02:26):
perfect time to have the National Stop Bullying Day. Randy
shows up to school with his teddy bear. Tell him
to stop bullying. National Emergency Nurses Day. Well, we have
a lot of appreciation for nurses. I know, I have
a lot more being around. See what they do. Man,
ain't that some kissing? We don't kissing nurse if if
(02:49):
you know them all right, I'm gonna stop right there.
Don't ruin Emergency Nurses Day. National General Pulaski Memorial Day.
Speaker 5 (02:59):
Say somebody something you know.
Speaker 4 (03:02):
This day is set aside in the US to recognize
Kasimir Pulaski. He was a Polish immigrant, one of Pillars
people over two centuries ago. He joined the Continental Army
and soon rose to the ranks to brigadier general. He'd
been around a bit, Yes, timeless, get to know General
(03:24):
Pulaski by pronouncing that Polish name.
Speaker 7 (03:27):
Oh, he's usually pulaskilas last Kilosky.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
Look, I kind of resent that you kind of making
fun of him, and you went Swedish there at the end. Well,
we got three days in thisory that we got saved
up right here, because that'll be our categories for Altburska.
The first prize pack out. You know, we'd like to
get the winning beginning early big shows on a radio,
(03:51):
Good morning big shows on a radio. First prize pack
is one of them. Bullsnot prize pack who it's liquoring bullsnot?
About one hundred twenty dollars were the bulls not cleaning products?
Check them out the truck stops across America. Click on
that bull snot banner from r info when you hit
the Big Show dot com. Look at our three dates
in history where we got our category.
Speaker 5 (04:15):
I should have had the paye turned to it. I
was so excited for you.
Speaker 4 (04:17):
Anymorry about General PULASKI I'm friends, you know your kicks.
Speaker 5 (04:24):
I need somebody spit my fingers or the You just
asked for someone to lick your fingers, so got it.
I gotta thank you, Martia.
Speaker 7 (04:33):
You've seen your responded immediately.
Speaker 5 (04:35):
Well all we wanted. Marcia actually got up and ran
over here.
Speaker 7 (04:38):
Bless your heart, tight and licking all the way around.
Speaker 4 (04:41):
Yeah, let's see here. October eleventh, nineteen seventy two, Michael
Galen of Carnes, Australia said the world banana eating record
he down sixty three bananas in ten minutes nineteen seven
teventy three. One year later, two Mississippi dock workers claimed
(05:04):
they were kidnapped by aliens aboard a UFO. The men
described the visitors from spaces, silver skinned, eyeless creatures with
slits for mouths and three weird appendages where nose and
ears should have been.
Speaker 7 (05:20):
They come booking in boogey, Hey go booging in loog.
Speaker 4 (05:24):
Mad Do you think they were just making something up
because they were luckily up?
Speaker 7 (05:28):
Well, this is the first we're hearing about it.
Speaker 4 (05:30):
Yeah, seventy three, all right, And finally, on this day
in eighty seven, the world's largest pizza was baked. The
pizza was cut and the ninety four thousand, two hundred
and forty eight slices.
Speaker 5 (05:43):
That's a big piece. Well, there you go.
Speaker 4 (05:45):
There's a Category's one eight hundred big shows you told
Free Line across America.
Speaker 5 (05:49):
Come on play out birds next.
Speaker 4 (06:17):
Good morning, it's a big show on the radio for you.
Wednesday October eleventh, Hey y'all listen to us now Huntsville, Alabama.
My favorite Southern rock band, Jive Mother Mary, gonna be
headlining Day two a Throttlefest this Saturday, single day weekend
Passes can be had at Throttle Fess HSV dot com,
(06:41):
keyboe with Jive Mother Mary's latest releases tour dates on Facebook,
in Instagram.
Speaker 5 (06:46):
I will get it.
Speaker 4 (06:48):
At Jive Mother Mary and at Jive Moothermary dot com
and right now, mey time, me man, wake up.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
Let's play uppers.
Speaker 7 (07:01):
It's the game that anyone can win.
Speaker 5 (07:05):
John Boy Billy to give the prizes from the big
Prize Beer. Let's go he contested number one.
Speaker 3 (07:14):
This should really be a lot.
Speaker 4 (07:16):
Of fun playing uppers.
Speaker 3 (07:20):
Have a hurry up and guest time you love the
best time. You have a big shots.
Speaker 4 (07:26):
Let's say, hey Chris from Moundsville, West Virginia, we have shots.
Good morning Chris, Good morning, Hey Bodie, welcome, Hi man.
We all awake, were pulling for you. Let's get you
(07:48):
through these categories and get that bulls not due.
Speaker 5 (07:50):
You're right all right?
Speaker 3 (07:52):
Sound good right man?
Speaker 4 (07:53):
In five seconds, three fruits you peel ready go apple, orange, banana, bam.
And now we need three things you see it a
doc Ready.
Speaker 3 (08:09):
Go fish, duck, fish and coal.
Speaker 4 (08:13):
Alright, and for the win, three pizza toppings ready go.
Speaker 3 (08:20):
Sauce, cheese, pepperoni.
Speaker 5 (08:22):
Bam.
Speaker 4 (08:24):
Yeah, man, hit it poor and we know why they
did that huge pizzas National Sausage pizza day to day.
Look at us putting things together, right, Chris, you jumping
in here, winning you one hundred and twenty dollars worth
of bulls not cleaning products.
Speaker 5 (08:39):
Congratulations.
Speaker 3 (08:41):
All right, thanks John boy. Hey, first time caller. Can
I get them new? You got one?
Speaker 1 (08:47):
All right?
Speaker 3 (08:47):
How about a shout out?
Speaker 4 (08:49):
I go ahead, all right to my wife Danielle, my
three kids.
Speaker 5 (08:54):
All right, we're gonna help get them up alright.
Speaker 4 (09:01):
As Christ and his papes in Moundsville, West Virginia winning
on the big show, bottom of the Guy wear on
top of your news twenty minute, the mayor from dismal
sepet right here in the studio, hang around anyway, Good morning,
(09:57):
it's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 5 (09:59):
Wrote it through you Wednesday.
Speaker 4 (10:01):
Then Braves played tonight and anybody see the Braves game
Monday night. Jaggie, you did high five to Jaggie Man
one to one the Phillies. The Braves are playing the
Phillies the postseason, likes the best out of five games.
Speaker 5 (10:22):
All right, this on right.
Speaker 4 (10:22):
Here, So the Braves best record in baseball have been
killing it. As a matter of fact, what I'm telling you.
Bob Ibach joined us about that Ronald Lacuna Junior commemorative
thirty four inch black bat, the full size celebrating his
in the seventy forty club limited edition. They might be
sold out. They only made two and twenty three of them,
(10:46):
five dollars each bat sold. You know, always donate to
the foundation. This is the Atlanta Braves Foundation. So you
might want to check see if they got in he left.
You can order to click on the Niko sports banner
at the Big Show dot com. You can call eight
hundred three four five twenty eight sixty eight. But anyway, yeah,
about the game that breaks, I hope they're not because
that was a great So anyway, so if they were
(11:10):
lost this game in Philly, they hadn't led in the
game like the first game stunk stunk it up. Yeah, thros,
and it even looked like it to late in the game.
And here they come in. They come back Austin Riley
home run take the lead by one. I think like
that was the bottom of the eighth. In the top
of the ninth and Phillies man, oh what's his name?
(11:32):
Not Turner, but the other one mckillleens. He was on
first there it is the tying run in the smack
one long Harris center field that goes back and jumps,
makes a great catching the fence turns around. Heaves at
the second base because what's his name's going to second,
so they.
Speaker 7 (11:51):
Except for the player's names, you're doing the next.
Speaker 4 (11:54):
Then they miss the cutoff man. It goes back and Riley,
who plays third base, picked it up. A rock at
the first base got him before he got back. A
double play like eight five three ft away, a huge
double play. Braves win the game on that play, as
(12:15):
also Solis down up one to one, and they play
again this evening. I think game times around five o'clock.
Speaker 7 (12:22):
All right, and catchy reenact tomorrow morning right here.
Speaker 8 (12:27):
On except for Wesson's name and good morning.
Speaker 5 (12:57):
That's a big show on the radio.
Speaker 4 (12:59):
There's always something exciting happening in beautiful dismal seep in
South Carolina, and he's here to tell us all about it.
I mean he's really here in person in our studio,
the Mayor himself, the Honorable Merwin Q Fiddleswoop. Good morning,
mister Mayor.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Good morning John Boy and all your wonderful listeners.
Speaker 4 (13:20):
Well we finally meet face to face, your exactly as
I pictured you.
Speaker 5 (13:25):
So are you? And may I say?
Speaker 2 (13:27):
Yikes?
Speaker 5 (13:29):
So what brings you to the city?
Speaker 2 (13:31):
My new expense account and my new government issued car.
Speaker 9 (13:34):
Ah.
Speaker 4 (13:35):
One of the perks of being the top dog man.
It doesn't hurt that I'm related to most of the
city council. Well isn't that a conflict of interest? And
I'm taking to the road to spread the word about
our big weekend coming up. It's the Dismal Seepage Happy
Keister Festival. Wow an Easter festival sounds fun up.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
Time to change the batteries in your earpiece there, mister
van Winkle. Keaster Festival, A time to celebrate the beauty
of the booty. Ah, nothing wrong with that, you know,
I'm down with it, John Boy. The weekend starts with
a big parade down Main Street. We've got the dancing
Winona's leading the way, shaking that famous Judd junk. The
(14:20):
Steve Harvey High School Marching Band will be playing Baby
Got Back, Fat Bottom Girls, Big Booty, and many other
dairy air related ditties. The Shriners are backed by popular demand.
The rear bumpers of their little cars will be sporting
big foam rubber butts. And you know someone's gonna get
rear ended. And you're talking about the cars, right, We've
(14:43):
got all sorts of salute the Majestic American Patuit. Everyone
signing up for the Big Serena Williams butt Pong competition
sponsored by Doctor Duff's Butt Lifts and Crack Shortening butt Pong.
Speaker 4 (15:02):
You know, you try to get the ping pong balls
into the cups. It's kind of like beer pong, but
you shoot him out of her well, you know, is
that really a thing? Yeah, all the kids are doing it,
you square. The local artists are lining up for the
posterior painting contest, using the fleshiest part of the human
(15:23):
body for a spectacular canvas sponsored by the Nick Cercy
Rectel Waxing Boutique and Justified Memorahilia and Porium.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
Don't forget like he says he's talent.
Speaker 5 (15:36):
Anything for the kids and.
Speaker 4 (15:38):
How John boy, everything from Whoope cushion musical chairs to
pin the tail in the Kardashian.
Speaker 5 (15:46):
I know you're gonna have some grate eats.
Speaker 4 (15:48):
It's the Big Smoky Butt's Cookoff, five pounds of Boston butts,
prepared by a host of chefs, hosted by Carl the
Crook himself. You mean Carl the Cook No, No, Carl
the Crook. He's a recently escaped felon who used to
break into barbecue restaurants and cook that pork. Right and
after the big closing night concert by Men at Twerk,
(16:10):
Will crown Miss Bdonka donc let me guess you're one
of the judges. We're not just celebrating aesthetic beauty of
the gluteus maximus. We're also giving a big salute to
digestive wellness featuring the launch of fiddle Swoops, fiber waffles
(16:31):
made with thirty different kinds of fiber and premium probiotics.
Remember if you need the poop, it's fiddle scoop. Hey,
you know that might be a good campaign slogan for you.
Speaker 5 (16:48):
No fs, hands or buds.
Speaker 4 (16:52):
Come on down to the Big Dismal Sea Bitch Happy
Keister Festival it's the living end you.
Speaker 2 (16:58):
Square what go now?
Speaker 10 (17:02):
Go now?
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Okay, Good morning, Stan Higgins here.
Speaker 11 (17:08):
Nothing makes my day like a chance to pipe in
on John Boy and Billy here in the Big Show.
But I don't come here just to see them. I'm
not a gay. I come here for the eye. Candy
Bab's Jackie and theater and Thanny's got a sweet tooth.
Speaker 2 (17:23):
How is that?
Speaker 5 (17:58):
Good morning on the radio. We don't Humma do your Homeday?
Speaker 4 (18:03):
October eleven, little man miss October.
Speaker 3 (18:08):
He don't troke a little bit?
Speaker 4 (18:09):
Feeling good here and the Paul win Thorpe won't.
Speaker 5 (18:13):
Mind Joe about John Boys wonderful than giveaway? Well, don't
give away number.
Speaker 4 (18:18):
Eighty four that hardcover books Becoming film Aloo, My Journey
to Hollywood, Maybury and Beyond, plus an autograph post it
note f and go author Jim Clark.
Speaker 11 (18:26):
Yeah, we go on.
Speaker 5 (18:27):
We'll give that away Friday, beginning of the last hour
of the Big Show.
Speaker 4 (18:30):
The way we do it, make sure you name an
hat you on't have the Big Show dot com. Good morning,
Big Show's on the radio, coming up? We played John
boyde every day we go. Do we get a winner?
Somebody will get a hat, t shirt, tumbler and a
twenty five dollars gas card from Law Tigers that'll fill
up your motorcycle. Lord Tigers motorcycle lawyers who ride representing
(18:52):
injured drivers for over two decades. With Lord Tigers, you
never ride alone. Click on the link when you go
to the Big Show dot Com. Hang on playboard in minutes.
Right now, it's time for Tayman News. And here's that girl,
Marcy Taytor Moren.
Speaker 12 (19:08):
You said, keep me updated on the trailer news.
Speaker 7 (19:13):
I did so, as we recapped.
Speaker 12 (19:15):
Two weeks ago, the Travis Kelchi frenzy began, and two
weeks ago Taylor Swift accepted his invitation to watch the
NFL football game. Well last weekend, she was not there
at the Oh.
Speaker 2 (19:28):
Yes, and he had a birthday and she wasn't.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
At the party.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
Oh but.
Speaker 7 (19:35):
This means she's got enough for the album already.
Speaker 2 (19:37):
She doesn't need him.
Speaker 12 (19:40):
Since two weeks ago, though Travis and Taylor among the
top three most searched public figures in the United States,
Beyonce is number three.
Speaker 5 (19:52):
Oh she is hot.
Speaker 7 (19:55):
Hey, you know that that movie thing that she's doing
of Taylor doing of her tour, They say that Beyonce
is studying that very carefully. She thinks she could do
that too.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
You get fifty of the ticket sales.
Speaker 12 (20:10):
Very interesting. Travis also in the news on Entertainment tonight,
they're reporting that he feels fatigued from the non stop
Travis Kelsey coverage.
Speaker 5 (20:22):
Like defensive coverage or like media the media.
Speaker 12 (20:26):
He's like, he understands that, you know, their their popular personalities.
Speaker 4 (20:31):
I imagine there's a lot of trash talking on the
football field, you know, if there is anyway I'm serious,
this is my job.
Speaker 7 (20:39):
Secret listing that job is not for you.
Speaker 12 (20:41):
We've decided, he said about the media on his podcast
with his brother quote, it's fun when they show who's
at the game. It adds to the atmosphere. But at
the same time they're overdoing it, especially my situation. Let's
dilated down.
Speaker 5 (20:56):
A little bit. Okay, tough out there.
Speaker 12 (21:03):
So you know about all the conflict going on in
Israel and the well, Bruno Mars had to cancel his
Saturday night show in Tel Aviv. They got him on
a plane and got him out and now so Bruto
Mars is home safe. Courted to Entertainment tonight, Seinfeld could
Seinfeld be about to get a new ending twenty five
(21:25):
years after the beloved sitcom.
Speaker 5 (21:27):
Well, they owe it to us.
Speaker 7 (21:29):
Well, that's part of the story of it, is that right.
Speaker 12 (21:32):
This surprising news came during Seinfeld's recent stand up set
at the Wang Theater in Boston. He told the audience
he had a little secret regarding the sitcom's divisive finale.
It's in response to a fan who asked whether he
liked oldernally.
Speaker 7 (21:48):
Now he wants you to do the voice when you're
when you're quoting him, though.
Speaker 12 (21:51):
Which voice would you like me to do?
Speaker 13 (21:54):
Seinfeld have a little secret, Jerry, He says, Well, I
have a little secret for you.
Speaker 7 (22:06):
I can't do it.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
You great, keep going, but.
Speaker 5 (22:10):
I can't really I can't.
Speaker 7 (22:12):
Still, Okay, you do it.
Speaker 4 (22:15):
How about why don't you just tell us the story?
Speaker 5 (22:20):
Y'all shut up.
Speaker 12 (22:21):
I can hear it in my head, but I can't.
Speaker 5 (22:26):
I can't do it.
Speaker 12 (22:27):
Yeah, Well, the secret is he can't tell anybody, but
something is going to happen that has to do with
the ending, and it hasn't happened yet.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
So and just what you're thinking about it annoyed as.
Speaker 12 (22:39):
You, and he said, and just what you are thinking
about Larry David and I have also been thinking about it.
So you'll see, we'll see.
Speaker 5 (22:51):
One as it would be.
Speaker 3 (22:55):
Idiots.
Speaker 4 (22:55):
Where did I leave them in prison? That would count
with them being older, you know, when they get out
or something.
Speaker 5 (23:02):
What about that? Huh. I'm already working on it. You
Larry David on the phone day.
Speaker 12 (23:06):
He said, what you're thinking, we're thinking.
Speaker 3 (23:13):
Sounds like your royal wedding.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
Boys, let's pretty need to think about it.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
And well, that's all right.
Speaker 5 (23:24):
The fuck, that's good.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
That's good.
Speaker 5 (23:26):
Thank you very much for that's a wonderful report. Look,
I go the.
Speaker 6 (23:31):
AI.
Speaker 5 (23:32):
Let's get us a winner.
Speaker 4 (23:34):
Let's play John boyd Jeopardy review yesterday's question. You probably
noticed in nearly all commercial airlines, gents are painted white,
and for good reasons. White paint reflects heat, requires less maintenance,
but it also saves the airline of money on every flight.
Speaker 7 (23:48):
This is why, because white paint weighs less.
Speaker 4 (23:51):
That is it, man, dark darker colors way more and
you gotta do more codes than everything we found out.
All right, there we go today's John Boy Jeopardy. According
to the experts, twenty minutes is the ideal duration for
this activity. Anymore or less can have negative results.
Speaker 5 (24:12):
What is cooking a twenty minute egg? What y'all got one?
Eight hundred bigs?
Speaker 4 (24:18):
So you told free line? Across America, we played John
Boy Jeopardy. Coming up your close. It's John Boy and
(24:52):
Billy and the game. Now, how is that closing?
Speaker 5 (24:57):
Because my superfly is never mind?
Speaker 3 (25:01):
Okay, let's wait.
Speaker 7 (25:05):
Yes, across America, heats young ch I now your host
the man of which the big in Big Show and
the hump in hump Day.
Speaker 3 (25:17):
He is Jock Lord.
Speaker 4 (25:22):
As they headed Jay out of Mobile, Alabama, good morning.
Speaker 5 (25:29):
To you, Jay Ooh who are sir? Hear you talking?
I'm glad you made it in here, buddy. Everything all right,
yes sir, yes sir, I'm gonna get some cool weather.
Speaker 4 (25:45):
We know, Dad man, I did well, Jay, you got
first shot at this John Boy Jeopardy this morning. According
to the experts, twenty minutes. That's the ideal duration for
this activity. Anymore or less can't have negative reason.
Speaker 5 (26:01):
What you got something? I'm gonver do in im Ont
says exercise?
Speaker 4 (26:08):
Okay, well, let's say is it exercise?
Speaker 5 (26:15):
I mean they say it what?
Speaker 4 (26:20):
Well, but they do say that what how many minutes
twenty thirty a day exercise at least they'd like for
you to do at least twenty minutes, at least twenty Jay, Well,
let's just start at ten and then see what happens there, buddy.
Speaker 5 (26:32):
Yeah, all right, my man, call me back. Let me
know how you go. Have a great.
Speaker 3 (26:39):
Day's going to have it?
Speaker 4 (26:40):
Yeah?
Speaker 9 (26:41):
You do?
Speaker 12 (26:41):
Now?
Speaker 4 (26:41):
All right, all right, buddy, let's go to Russ. He's
in Lancaster, South Carolina. Good morning, Russ, Hey, good morning.
Speaker 5 (26:49):
How's everybody doing? Hey man, we are doing good?
Speaker 3 (26:52):
All right?
Speaker 5 (26:53):
Got you here, Russ? Your shot at it?
Speaker 3 (26:55):
Bunny?
Speaker 4 (26:56):
It is not exercise twenty minutes ideal duration for what? Well,
my mind was going one direction?
Speaker 6 (27:05):
And yeah, is it? Is it a nap?
Speaker 5 (27:10):
What is going the other direction?
Speaker 4 (27:12):
If you're let's say no, we're gonna communicate.
Speaker 5 (27:18):
No, let's yeah, let's draw it out.
Speaker 2 (27:19):
Since the connection is so good.
Speaker 5 (27:22):
I don't think that's a great idea.
Speaker 4 (27:23):
Okay, show us nap. Yes, this his mind was going
one way. I wanted to know what was going the
other way. Let's just drop it, all right, Russ, you win, buddy,
big old long Tiger's prize back down Laster for you.
Speaker 5 (27:44):
Awesome you guys.
Speaker 4 (27:46):
I really appreciate you guys. Thank you so much.
Speaker 5 (27:48):
Glad you want man? Hang on? How's jump out? Cut
you up on your news? Ride on the other side,
by God.
Speaker 4 (28:00):
Time capsule over this October eleven, I ain't gonna wait.
Speaker 9 (28:35):
This is the award winning John Boy and Billy Big Show,
the South's number one exports.
Speaker 14 (28:50):
Listen out front. I love my self. I hate my body.
I used to be felt and I'm mul blob. I
love to eat it thord of my hobby. If it's
not tied down, it's going bye bye.
Speaker 11 (29:11):
I can eat anything else.
Speaker 14 (29:15):
When I think about food, I weigh myself.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
Oh I canny anything else? Oh no, oh no, oh
hell just this one last doughnut?
Speaker 11 (29:28):
Oh hello, Babs. Yes, unfortunately it's that bad.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
How bad? I'll tell you how bad.
Speaker 11 (29:34):
You know how I dry my hair in the morning,
I step on the scale, lean over, and the breeze
from the spinning dial drives my hair.
Speaker 2 (29:40):
I'll tell you that right now. I've tried a diet.
Love what happened.
Speaker 11 (29:47):
I had to go on two diets at once because
I wasn't getting enough to eat on one.
Speaker 6 (29:51):
Oh.
Speaker 11 (29:51):
I tried the lap band the probably once that didn't
have enough material to go around my lap?
Speaker 2 (29:59):
What's that?
Speaker 11 (30:00):
Your your friend Tiffany had good luck with the diet? Really,
do tell the garlic diet?
Speaker 5 (30:06):
What is that?
Speaker 11 (30:08):
You don't have to lose weight? You just looked in
her from a distance. Ah, will crafted you know better
than to do me like that when I'm hurt.
Speaker 2 (30:18):
I told the seventh Fleet.
Speaker 11 (30:20):
Okay, go make your potty appointment. I'll stay here and
stare at the biscuits.
Speaker 2 (30:24):
There she goes, tippy toads.
Speaker 11 (30:27):
Where she stops is where she goes, and she's gone,
We're bab She thinks a gastric bypass is a French detour.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
The Big Show felt speaking.
Speaker 11 (30:44):
I'm going to help you, Oh, Marcel, Oh, I'm so disappointed.
Speaker 2 (30:49):
I can't seem to lose a pound.
Speaker 11 (30:52):
I swear this John Boy is just not getting it done.
What oh I call my diet John Boy?
Speaker 2 (31:00):
Neither one of them works.
Speaker 11 (31:01):
Oh oh, I just can't hide it anymore. I went
to the men's store the other day. When I walked in,
they directed me to the Billy Gardell section.
Speaker 4 (31:11):
WHOA.
Speaker 11 (31:12):
What's really embarrassing is the shirt I bought was so big,
the tags had made in the USA and China and
Algeria and Pakistan.
Speaker 2 (31:23):
You get the idea. Oh, you're very nice. I'm not
fooling anyone anymore. I used to deny it.
Speaker 11 (31:29):
I tell people I was still wearing stuff I were
in high school, but I didn't tell them that it
was earrings.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
And heels for it. Oh, it was awful.
Speaker 11 (31:39):
The other day at the airport, the TSA guys detained me,
saying they found two hundred pounds of.
Speaker 2 (31:44):
Crack in my pants.
Speaker 11 (31:47):
At Gaye Bengo, they call me battleship because it takes
three tugs to get me into a slip.
Speaker 2 (31:56):
And the bonus. I got a sunburn over the weekend.
All the kids in the neighborhood yelled, hey, Koli.
Speaker 11 (32:03):
I took some paper thoughts a booger branch ranch for
John Boy to sign. I dropped my pen and when
I bent over to pick it up, milk truck money said, Lord,
it looks like two pigs fighting over a milk done.
Not a confidence booster. Even my shrink isn't sympathetic. I
told him I'm uncomfortable in my body. He said, probably
because it's so crowded. It's a terrible doctor. He's the
(32:28):
one that gave me the advice of standing naked in
front of the mirror before eating.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
FYI that it's.
Speaker 11 (32:33):
Frowned upon at the Golden Corral. Oh boy, here comes
the bab's a lama ding dong. I gotta go and
Marcel Dust.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
Hello, my angel, ready to roll? What's that? Big bat?
Speaker 11 (32:51):
Girl down the hall had a diet tip that's interesting,
ironic but interesting.
Speaker 2 (32:57):
Let's hear it. Uh huh she.
Speaker 11 (32:59):
Said, to lose weight, go to the paint store. Wow,
how is that supposed to work?
Speaker 5 (33:06):
Ah?
Speaker 2 (33:06):
Of course you can get thinner there?
Speaker 11 (33:09):
To me, the most obvious thing, Oh my head, Give
me a beefy and of goodies to the Minnie.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
Coopers carry out straight people, John Boy and Dilly.
Speaker 3 (33:21):
Next week, I'm going on a.
Speaker 6 (33:23):
Diet Good morning radio, dumb right, Good morning.
Speaker 4 (33:54):
That's a big show on the radio. Let's welcome back Rabbi,
myron Berg.
Speaker 2 (33:58):
Steam me homies. What's happening John Boyeme and Billy Collyam?
Speaker 5 (34:04):
How's he going?
Speaker 3 (34:05):
Rebbi?
Speaker 10 (34:05):
Yes, a cute trying to phrase their gum shoe straight dope?
I mean, can you even say that anymore? Don't you
have to give equal time to the gatoes. I don't
understand the world no more.
Speaker 5 (34:18):
No, Well, who's your friend there?
Speaker 2 (34:20):
Eh, that's no friend, that's my great grandson. Smoothy.
Speaker 5 (34:24):
How's he going? Smoothly? Hey?
Speaker 10 (34:26):
Look up from your phone and the dollars speaking? Tell
you your little turt. Oh, he's a mess. I gotta take
him to the Orthodonis today. Get his braces looked at.
Does he need him tighten or loosen?
Speaker 5 (34:38):
Look?
Speaker 10 (34:39):
If the next words are your mouta, I reckon. I
could do that for a lot less.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
I'm leaving.
Speaker 10 (34:44):
Nah, he's just going in for cleaning. He got into
the Halloween candy early, and the dentist has the pressure
washed the camels off your pants.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
I spend enough fortune on that, your little t.
Speaker 5 (34:56):
What did you wind up seeing?
Speaker 6 (34:58):
Well?
Speaker 10 (34:58):
I wanted to go see that sequelizer movie, but it
was sold out, so I went to see The Expandables
Fall Expendable, No, no expandables.
Speaker 2 (35:07):
They all got fat.
Speaker 10 (35:10):
I always liked these movies, lots of action and wise
cracking good times. This time the guys I after some
spendrick with a knook and it's all hands on deck
to save the oil.
Speaker 5 (35:20):
Who sounds great? How's a cast.
Speaker 10 (35:22):
Oh, fantastic Rockies in there. The transportatos in there. The
blonde Russian guy from the Rocky movies is in there.
They got some no faces.
Speaker 2 (35:32):
They even got a girl Ooo nice to look at.
Can't act kind.
Speaker 10 (35:40):
Of like Tita here, that's fair, But there was a
new face that I love. He's a great character actor.
I watched him his entire career, and he never disappoints.
The great actor Andy Divine, Andy Garcia. Andy Devine was
an old Tommy cowboy actor you're thinking of Andy gar.
Speaker 2 (36:01):
I thought that was the sheriff with the big ears
in the stupid deputy.
Speaker 5 (36:04):
That was Andy Griffith.
Speaker 10 (36:07):
I thought that was the guy who did all those
Christmas specials with his ex wife that killed that skier.
Speaker 5 (36:12):
That's Andy Williams.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
I thought that was that albino guy who painted soup cans.
Speaker 5 (36:17):
That was Andy Warhol.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
I thought that was that the black and white bear
who hung out with that crazy woodpecker.
Speaker 5 (36:25):
That's Andy Pander.
Speaker 2 (36:28):
I thought that was the guy who used to be
behind the glass and now he's on the monitor.
Speaker 5 (36:32):
That's Andy Abdall.
Speaker 2 (36:35):
So who the hell am I thinking of?
Speaker 5 (36:37):
Andy Garcia?
Speaker 2 (36:38):
I wish they were still a Mayberry. All the guys
the single and all the bronze were horny.
Speaker 5 (36:45):
So what do you think?
Speaker 2 (36:46):
I called them hot dames and no one got brightened.
Speaker 10 (36:50):
Andy and Bonnie the movie, Oh hey, I give it
fun to half Yarmicha's great fun. They entertaining nobody, telling
you to save the planet, making sure everyone is represented
on screen.
Speaker 2 (37:05):
I don't know.
Speaker 10 (37:06):
Maybe that's what floats your book. Maybe that kind of
stuff is what you look for in the film. And
listen up, snowflake, go stick your nose up. Hollywood's took us.
That's all they got these days. You exactly what's wrong
with the world. Dictate to everybody what they should and
shouldn't like, filling up movies with your talking points in
your propaganda.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
Good for your loser.
Speaker 10 (37:31):
Well, I guess some of it, wouldn't he nothing? God
bless I say, peace be with you. Idiot can see
him at night.
Speaker 2 (37:40):
It's cheaper. Oh,
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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