January 22, 2025 • 34 mins
Wednesday (pt 2 of 2): On today’s Late Riser’s Podcast, JD’s 24-hour has an edgy approach to couples counseling - JD’s Wife School.. - John Boy’s got a new big screen smart TV that he is too dumb for.. - We’ll give Haywood Banks’ “18-Wheels on a Big Rig” a spin by request.. - Rev. Sincere and Goober pop-in for some humoroids.. - Ike Turner recommends hiring a foreign woman to take care of your kiddies.. - We’ll honor our late friend, Dub Starnes with a classic JB&B Playhouse.. - and we’ll wrap up with some more listener letters…
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:22):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
The big show is on the radio.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Well till Wednesday morning.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Here.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
All right, that's ringing man, Rav.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
You go first.
Speaker 1 (00:31):
That microphone right there, that's that's all. That's all.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
That's good morning, that job. Good morning, Randy.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
Hey, hey Jack, what up?
Speaker 3 (00:41):
Girl? You're keeping these straight people white?
Speaker 4 (00:44):
I mean, you're keeping straight?
Speaker 1 (00:46):
Yeah, it ain't easy.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
Raverend earnestly sincere yea.
Speaker 4 (00:49):
You know, the Lord will though us a curve every
once in a while, just to make sure we're paying attention.
Case in point, I was sitting in my office Sunday morning.
Speaker 5 (00:57):
Ms.
Speaker 4 (00:58):
Willa may Rude OFLFH, the head of the Sunday School,
comes in. She says, Rev, we got some no problem here.
One of the Sunday School teachers.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
Is out sick.
Speaker 4 (01:05):
I ain't got nobody to teach a lesson. I said, well,
that ain't no problem. My class, is it? She said,
second grade? I said, don't you worry about it. I'll
come down there and teach it myself. Heck, if a
preacher can't handle a bunch of second graders, he ain't
got no business in the pool pit at eleven o'clock.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
You know what I mean, what's the lesson?
Speaker 4 (01:20):
Supposed to be about missus. Rudolf says, well, we in
the middle of a ten week see reason the ten Commandments?
I said, well, you just leave everything to meet. So
I went down in the second grade classroom. It's about
a dozen children, and I said, okay, y'all, I'm gonna
be filling in this week. And I hey, y'all been
talking about the ten Commandments? Which one did y'all do
last week? One little girl said the one about not
killing people? I said, okay, I said number six. So
(01:42):
all right, this week we gonna look at number seven.
I thought to myself, oh, number seven, that's adultery. Now,
how am I gonna talk about that to a bunch
of second graders. Okay, Lord, I'm gonna need to bar
some of your wisdom on this one. So I clear
my thought. I said, Commandment number seven is thou shalt
not commit adultery? And saying this little boy in the
backing room raised his hand. I thought, oh, here we go.
(02:03):
So I said, uh, yes, young man, did you have
a question? He said, yeah, what does commit mean? Even
know what the law's going through? Your speaking of not
being sure what's happening? Ladies and gentlemen, here is gooling.
Speaker 6 (02:17):
Thank you very much, your day appreciated. Keep praying, baby,
he'll throw some Hebrew you will except right here, boys,
you believe in life after death? The boss asked one
of his employees, Yes, sir, you. Employee said, well there,
that makes everything just fine. Boss went on after you
left yesterday to go to your grandmother's funeral, she called.
The man goes to a shriek and says, doctor, my
(02:38):
wife's said faithful to me. Every evening she goes to
Larry's bar, picks up. Then, in fact, she sleeps with
anybody who ask her I'm going crazy?
Speaker 2 (02:45):
Well you think I should do? U?
Speaker 6 (02:47):
Doc says, all relaxed, Now take a deep breath, cob down,
do tell me exactly where is Larry's bas Old man
goes to the wizard, ask her if he could remove
a curse he been living with for the last forty years.
Wizards as well, baby, but you got to tell me
the exact words that were used to put the curse.
Odio o Bed says, without hesitation, I down, pronounce you bad?
Speaker 2 (03:07):
And why oh?
Speaker 6 (03:09):
John was hold his death bed gas pitifully kivvy one
last request here gas.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
His wife said, okay, John, what do you want? He said, six.
Speaker 6 (03:20):
Months after I die, I want you to marry Joe.
She said, I thought you hated Joe. He said, I do.
Man picked up a young woman at the bar, persuade
her to come back to this hotel. They relaxing afterwards.
He said, by the first man you ever made love to.
She looks at him. She said, maybe you look kind
of familiar. Man, don't see the Rabbi rab By, something
(03:43):
terrible's happening. I got to talk to you about it.
Rabb I said, what's wrong? Man said, my wife is
poisoning me. Rabbi shocked.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
How can that be?
Speaker 6 (03:49):
Said, I'm telling you I know she's poisoning me. Now
what should I do? Rabbi says, well, you just calm down.
Let me talk to her. I'll see what I can
find out. I'll let you know by the week later.
Rabbi calls back. He said, well, I talk to your
wife on the phone for about three hours. You won't
buy advice.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
I said, yeah.
Speaker 6 (04:03):
Rabb I said, take the poison. Two elderly gentlemen from
a retirement center. We're sitting on the bench under a tree.
One turns, other says Slim, I've eighty three years old. Down,
I'm just full of eggs and pains. I know you're
about my age.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
How do you feel? Slim says, hey.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
I feel just like a new board.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Baby say yeah, no, heir.
Speaker 7 (04:22):
No teething.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
I think I just messed my pants.
Speaker 6 (04:27):
A fella is standing on the street corner. Ten dye
old kid walks up to a fella says, hey, Judah,
can I help you? He says, yeah, I'm lost, mister,
can you help me find by daddy? Fella says Why'll
give it a try?
Speaker 2 (04:37):
What's he like?
Speaker 7 (04:38):
Kid says?
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Bear and women with great big babes. Right for the
humor coaching today.
Speaker 6 (04:45):
Alright, Ernie, have I taken this infot good Morning to
make show us on the radio? Hang over your local
news weatheringsport.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
This is real.
Speaker 8 (04:58):
That is thick beetle, slayer of the Visicals, destroyer of
the Mongol, and.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
Aggravator of the Ottoman Empire.
Speaker 9 (05:08):
All listening to my two royal.
Speaker 8 (05:11):
Jesners, those gap toothed barbarians, John Boy and Billyard Old
Big show A rise, a loyer of beef, A rise
Duke of Ellington, a rise water of ten essence of
merd milk of Vacnisia.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
There's a big show on the radio coming up on
gun Vince Quiz.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
He's the way if you join the Winterers, you just
take sea. You got it done. Let's see what they else.
You have an old Charo, I mean Charro, are you know?
And you make fun of people that can't say.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
What was what was Charro's little things? She always sid would.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
You cut you caut you you o?
Speaker 2 (06:26):
Huchi Kuchi kuchi Gucci kuchikoki.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
That's what that led.
Speaker 6 (06:31):
The fairy used to say, itchich. Now she wasn't the
one that had the fruit basket on her head.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
That's Carmen Miranda. Charo's one was always on a love boat.
Speaker 6 (06:42):
Oh she was on a next Tail commercial or one
of those yeah wireless phone commercials.
Speaker 10 (06:47):
One actually supposed to be a really good uh Spanish guitarist,
Is that right?
Speaker 1 (06:51):
Seriously?
Speaker 10 (06:51):
Yeah, they say she's very talented, but well she is
the Ichi Gucci Gucci thing kind of gets in the way.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
Well here does.
Speaker 6 (06:56):
She claims she was born in nineteen fifty one, but
there are reports that she petitioned a Spanish court to
legally subtract ten years from her birth certificate, thereby changing
her real year of birth from nineteen forty one to
nineteen fifty one. Now, her age shuffling has even confused
a few sources into incorrect reporting that she was born
(07:17):
in nineteen thirty one, while others claim as in nineteen
forty two. She says most people don't realize that she's
the person who actually introduced the nineteen ninety six Makarina
craze to America. Sam's Charro was performing it on cruise
ships as early as nineteen ninety four.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Huh.
Speaker 6 (07:34):
Charroo's real name is Maria Rosario Pilar Martinez. She's fluent
in English, Spanish, French, Italian and Japanese.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Whoever speaks those, they can't understand her either.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
KNEI watch canichi?
Speaker 4 (07:47):
What can eat you?
Speaker 5 (07:47):
Why?
Speaker 1 (07:49):
Wow?
Speaker 10 (07:49):
That's his charo Jarro Japanese speaking? Now, what if Charo
and James Brown did a duet?
Speaker 11 (07:58):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (08:00):
All head work? That you'd actually do? It sounds like
a street fight.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
And you having a birthday today? Happy birthday?
Speaker 6 (08:10):
Good morning again, the big show is on the radio
coming up. The easiest way for you to get your
name in this winner's hat because it's the current events quiz.
This is the easiest way for you to join the
winners down one eight hundred big show.
Speaker 10 (08:22):
Maybe that should be your new Daytona Yo?
Speaker 7 (08:27):
Was there?
Speaker 1 (08:27):
That works out?
Speaker 6 (08:29):
You billy?
Speaker 1 (08:29):
What we gonna deal with this morning?
Speaker 10 (08:31):
We're gonna talk about Madonna's latest project. Madonna's latest project.
All right here, it is easy way for you all
to win. What eight hundred big show you told? Free line,
We'll take nine and win with you. Next play lady,
(09:06):
good morning the.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
Big shows on your radio? Come on girls, okay?
Speaker 6 (09:17):
Qui dolor nine are contesting ont a fort Payne, Alabama?
Speaker 1 (09:26):
Is Carrie? Good morning?
Speaker 3 (09:27):
Carrie, Good morning?
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Joe boy.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Would you go to the prom with me?
Speaker 2 (09:31):
Oh yeah, I'd be delighted.
Speaker 7 (09:36):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Which one of you you think would get pigs blood
dumped on it?
Speaker 12 (09:41):
Which one do you think would show up at the
problem with pigs blood already on?
Speaker 3 (09:46):
It's not pigs blood, it's grilling.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
So all right, Carrie, listen to bit I see if
you can win baby?
Speaker 10 (09:52):
Okay, Well, Carrie Madonna has signed a deal with Penguin
Publishing to write a children's book. The pop star is
attempting to tone down her raunchy image since the birth
of her son Rocko. The new book will be aimed
at kids six and older and the working title is
A A Trip to the Big City B No more
(10:15):
war or C. Heather has two mommies, three daddies, and
a Puerto Rican guy with.
Speaker 7 (10:20):
A video.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
That has gotta be se.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
Yes, that's a good idea.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
Oh yeah, wait to go carry you in baby?
Speaker 2 (10:35):
Oh cool, Thank you, you're welcome.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Thank you for listening to us.
Speaker 6 (10:39):
Now you hold on, don't be afraid to give Jackie
your name address, and now we get in touch with you.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Okay, prom seasons just around the corner. Good morning, everybody.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
You got a big showing a radio, right, big shoning
a radio. A let's take any newsletter sports.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
This is Spanky from the Yellow Rose.
Speaker 9 (11:02):
You're listening to the greatest morning show and recorded history
of broadcast radio, John Boy and Billie Big Show.
Speaker 3 (11:09):
How big is it?
Speaker 1 (11:11):
Bigger than my head?
Speaker 2 (11:13):
And that's big.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
There? Yeah, so b I read it and I'll pay
that tabby a seat, dead beat.
Speaker 6 (11:52):
Good morning, and you got the big show on the
radio coming up. We'll play stupid quiz. I'll play calling
on fourth and six grade level edgic cation material Marshie
Marshia hos a glass speaking of that random You're on
a clear diet?
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Is that what I heard you say? Now? That was yesterday.
Speaker 12 (12:06):
I'm better now, that's what the doc go on clear
diet said.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
What does that mean?
Speaker 12 (12:13):
Eat nothing? No, things you can see through.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
Eat things you can see through.
Speaker 12 (12:18):
So Swiss cheese, that's okay?
Speaker 10 (12:19):
No, no, and I stuck with holes in it. Parent
stuff like soup. Yeah, like broth, No, like vodka.
Speaker 1 (12:28):
Soup's only food. I think of a juice sea through broth.
Speaker 12 (12:31):
And you know I should have drank coffee and yellow
and what not.
Speaker 1 (12:35):
Yeah, h all right, don't mock my dogs because I
heard Steve off of your piece of beef jerky. It
was eating. No, I can't eat solid food.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
I was sick, okay.
Speaker 6 (12:51):
According to a new study, two out of three eight
nine year old New Zealanders can't locate their own country
on the Globe Actional Education Monitoring Project. Survey showed some
children put in New Zealand in the northern hemisphere, others
in North America, near to South America, or even Africa.
Well see American kids.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
Ain't that numb? So much for the smart kids in
New Zealand.
Speaker 12 (13:14):
Don't be selling American kids short.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
There are plenty dumb.
Speaker 10 (13:17):
Oh, here's a good one. A man in Yemen divorced
his first wife because she was loud and argumentative. His
new bride was a deaf and mute woman.
Speaker 1 (13:26):
There's your angle, dude, right there.
Speaker 10 (13:30):
She's said to be quiet and mild manner.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
We got to you, Johnny's get even wear one of
those collars. And then she talks to loud.
Speaker 2 (13:36):
About Oh.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
That's some stuff going on there, and hang on.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
Good morning to make show. It's on the radio.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
We're doing all ride this Wednesday morning. And now let's
spring an ike.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
Yo, what's up?
Speaker 9 (14:26):
I'd have been here sooner, but uh Patrick got to
brow him. He been gone for by two days. I
had to hitchhike in imagine that. Oh, welcome a man
like me. Welcome to another episode of as.
Speaker 2 (14:40):
For all the far why one you need for all
your so called Afro perspiration relationship?
Speaker 3 (14:48):
Did this?
Speaker 9 (14:49):
Did I met the Turner? That's what I'm talking about.
You remember that Jackie met the Turner. My sweet husband
and I have been married for fourteen years. We had
three beautiful cheerren ages twelve, eleven, and seven. The two
oldest our girls, and the youngest is a boy. We
both loved him with all our hearts, but they had
called the rift in our relation of shrimp when we
(15:12):
were first married. I greet my man at the door.
I have to hit hard day at work with a
big kids. Welcome him home with loving arms, Take his suit,
hang it up for him while I laid out some
comfortable clothes to wear. That I'd fix him a drink,
serve him a lovely.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Then, of course you did.
Speaker 2 (15:28):
You're a woman, ain't you who?
Speaker 1 (15:31):
Today we play soft Senda's music and and charge each other.
That's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 3 (15:38):
Nine so wrapped up and our children.
Speaker 9 (15:40):
I hardly had time to say hello to him when
he comes to the door. By the time the cheering
are in bed, then a man cleaned up. I don't
have nothing left to give my man. Mister Turner, you
hear that, mister Turner, Please hit me. There are so
many young, beautiful women out there looking for a good man.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
I was lucky enough to.
Speaker 9 (15:59):
Find one of the few, and I don't want to
lose it. How can I save our love? Sad by
the sea? Did sad so? You too busy to get busy.
Speaker 7 (16:10):
Huh.
Speaker 9 (16:12):
Your young has got you so worn out that you
ain't got nothing left to wear your man out, ain't
no sense, and you're doing everything you can't happen. You
ain't no march toart. You want to save your love life.
All you got to do is figure out something to
do with your children, And always I got the answer.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
Let me preach on it.
Speaker 9 (16:33):
Option of number one. Sell your children. You don't want
to give them away. This is your chance to get
back some of that long green you done shelled out
raising them a little monster so far. But if you
already got attached to them and all emotionally like and
ain't interested in your reblake, see option in number two.
(16:54):
Option in number two, get a natty that's like uh
living in babysitter and don't go hide no chubbing neighborhood ska.
If you're gonna spend your harder benjaminins, y'all might as
well hire someone that's easy on the eyeballs and to
get high quality and a little price high and farder.
(17:18):
They're all kinds of fine looking holes MOBAs.
Speaker 1 (17:23):
Uh uh what you call Russian Indians.
Speaker 9 (17:25):
And then in the Hong Kong E's and the Swedishes
and all sorts of third worlds booty lichens, babysitters, and
since the day has just dying to get into this country,
and they don't care who that baby daddy is, They
just want the job. No, I know what you're saying.
Why would I bring you in some hot green cord
(17:46):
hoochie to strut around in front of my oh love
the pride Man.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
Allow me to uh a loose ridict.
Speaker 9 (17:52):
The afromentioned hoochi is Sue serves two porpoises.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
One she keep the.
Speaker 9 (17:58):
Kids out of your hair while you and mac Daddy
go two out of three falls, and two, when she's
parading around your humble a dove in that teddy and throng,
you gonna buy her your husband's long buried hard normal
emotions will errupturate and you will be swept away in
a tiradal wave of passion. After all, you gets more
(18:19):
fly win hornted than vinegar. And play your cards right
and you might be able to talk Old Mary Pimpin's
into what you call a moranue.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Troy.
Speaker 9 (18:32):
Now, if all heals fails, refer to option in number three.
Put your foot in the crack of someone backside. He
ain't gonna solve no merit of proflamations, but you sure
will feel better. This is ike, peace out, get more
fly with horned than vinegar. Good morning, and you got
(18:52):
the Big Show on the radio. More chances for you
to win coming up after your news, weather, and sports.
Speaker 6 (18:59):
Come on either day.
Speaker 13 (19:00):
Because you know, no Sicilian can refuse a request on
the day of his daughter's wedding. I shall grant your requests.
Someday I may ask a favorite of you, maybe a haircut.
Maybe I'll ask you to lay down your life for me.
Maybe I'll just ask you to listen to John Boy
and Billy on the Big Show. Would you rather wake
(19:20):
up with a horse's head or these two horses?
Speaker 1 (19:22):
Ask?
Speaker 6 (19:56):
Good morning, a big show is on the radio. We
got another contest to go today. That'd be stupid quiz.
I'll play calling nine and fourth fifth sixty grade level
educational material that's coming up in just a few minutes
sharp this morning. Alrighty, are you talking to them or you?
I'm just advice listening.
Speaker 4 (20:14):
I'm not.
Speaker 6 (20:15):
I don't feel that sharp to day, so this might
be a good chance for you to beat me. Come on,
so hang on we're gonna play in minutes. Good morning,
the Big Show is on the radio. For aging stupid
quiz A message for Stacy Lewis. Yes, uh, stay, said
John Boy. I still have this cape I slaved over
for weeks.
Speaker 7 (20:35):
Do you have yet?
Speaker 1 (20:35):
Let me know when to bring it to you. My
feelings are starting to get hurt.
Speaker 6 (20:39):
Let me know when you want it. Yes, Stacy Lewis
made my case. I'm sorry, Stacy, I got that email.
I forgot to say anything. Anytime, all right, anytime during
the week that the show's on.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
I'm here there now.
Speaker 3 (20:52):
Is that so hard?
Speaker 1 (20:53):
We don't know. We don't have to have a specific time.
Just bringing on in.
Speaker 3 (20:57):
You're playing with people's lives here.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
See why you're putting it off. Just find just the
right words.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
Yeah, as is Daisy.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
Yeah, I'm ready for my cape. Bringing on all right,
I said, wearing a stupid quiz. I still think the
fur coat with the hood.
Speaker 6 (21:17):
Yeah you know, well, Keith King brought me the cape
that his mama made me, like the NASCAR cape.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
But really lounging.
Speaker 12 (21:24):
But it's not the dress.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (21:26):
Yeah, it kind of lounging and it works better really
as an apron I think it really was an apron
and they just told me it was a cape because
it's got those apron strings now tied around.
Speaker 2 (21:35):
My neck just to cook on.
Speaker 5 (21:36):
It down around my neck and it pulls on my
throat when it goes down. It's not you know, that's
because it's tight around your neck. He was pulled around
your waist. It would be pulling on your waist.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
Anyways. Yeah, so I liked out. That's a good lounging cake.
But yeah, I look forward to my new cape cat
Stacy's right.
Speaker 12 (21:55):
Yeah, yeah, but the one they sent over to put
on the gift Horse fits a lot better.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
I wouldn't complain about it. Five Yeah, yeah, I'm not
complaining about that, just commenting. You can't get good.
Speaker 6 (22:06):
Capes anymore, all right, right now, Stupide quiz time he
got the lesson playing Marcy. Yeah sure, yes, okay, then
we need caller number nine one eight hundred big show
playing for the aforementioned prize baggage. Let's do it, Stupie
(22:30):
quiz playing next Good morning, a big show is on a.
Speaker 3 (23:05):
Radio, go ahead and asks me.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Have you seen juniors? Great man?
Speaker 6 (23:26):
But that's me calling number nine, who's playing me in
the stupid quiz. That's Michael out of Huntsville, Alabama.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
Good morning, Michael, Good morning. How you doing. You're feeling
sharp this morning?
Speaker 9 (23:39):
Let me get another cup of coffee here?
Speaker 10 (23:40):
Yeah, no fair using stimulants to performance enhancers.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
Right, my got a touchdown phone, touch a number for me.
That's what you chime in? You go, I got the bell,
Marcia Marsha got the question me, Kay, Marsie.
Speaker 2 (23:59):
We're starting by let's go to sign. What do we
call a meteor that reaches the Earth's surface?
Speaker 1 (24:08):
Asteroid?
Speaker 4 (24:09):
No?
Speaker 1 (24:12):
Man, knew first you're about.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Hey, Michael's going for it.
Speaker 6 (24:17):
It's got to be a meteorite.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
That's right, right, right, it is right, Michael. Want to nothing, man,
Let's go to math class. I'm we'll have a little
review from yesterday. Oh no, all right, what do you
think I was playing anywhere?
Speaker 2 (24:34):
What is the smallest whole number that is divided by
both five and eight? O?
Speaker 1 (24:39):
O hey wait a minute, those are different numbers yesterday? Michael, Michael, Yes, forty.
I was paying fast written.
Speaker 12 (24:52):
Oh he had five over and eight and then a
line drawn. He was going to add five.
Speaker 6 (25:00):
Am I right out of bad skunking me? Two to
nothing of bats right near that one, I mean right
off the box.
Speaker 2 (25:10):
Okay, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
That's a whole.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
Writing it down.
Speaker 12 (25:16):
Well, we're two to nothing.
Speaker 7 (25:18):
Yeah, man.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
US and World History, US and world history?
Speaker 1 (25:26):
What US city was originally named New Amsterdam.
Speaker 7 (25:31):
New York.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
Who being around?
Speaker 4 (25:35):
It's just like that.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
This young is home getting through my first time getting.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Over ten years.
Speaker 10 (25:46):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 6 (25:47):
Alright and dead, Let's take our break, get into John
o'bilt Playhouse, Classic Bit of the Morning starring Douve. Hang on,
good morning, the Big Show is on the radio, and
uh Classic Bit time. Yes, we're celebrating the old Buddy
Dub with playhouses that Dub start in coming up next,
hang out, good morning, A big shows on the radio
(26:34):
coming up Open line time. How's some emails with the
Big Show dot com?
Speaker 2 (26:39):
Right now Classic Mid of the Morning.
Speaker 6 (26:40):
We're celebrating Dub as he starred in our John Boy
Billy playhouses.
Speaker 10 (26:47):
Welcome to John Boy and Billy Playhouse. Today's episode three
Angry Men. As our story opens, Dub, General Tom and
their pal Doctor Beeper are on the seventh at Brushy
Wood Country Club.
Speaker 7 (27:02):
Has anybody seen my ball?
Speaker 3 (27:05):
Eyah? If I had a guess I'd say this over
in that bunker on the left.
Speaker 14 (27:09):
Oh, I tell you, having a rough time after that
second shot on number four, I didn't think he was
ever coming back.
Speaker 7 (27:15):
Yeah, I was so far back in the woods I
saw a skelting sitting on the bulldozer.
Speaker 6 (27:20):
That's Here's why Dubber Dubber? Is it a titleist? I
think this is it right over here?
Speaker 7 (27:26):
Thanks Doc. Okay, fella, here goes nothing.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
Hold him into dub It seemed three guys in front
of us here, just now getting to the green.
Speaker 7 (27:34):
Okay, those guys must be holding up us all day.
Speaker 6 (27:39):
Gentlemen, I've been a member of this club for almost
thirty years, and I've never seen such an aptitude on
the cars.
Speaker 7 (27:48):
There goes Carl to greenskeeping. Maybe he knows who they are. Hey, Carl,
come over here a second.
Speaker 1 (27:53):
H how's you going to Dubburgh.
Speaker 11 (27:55):
Good winning your region reship, good winning your doctor?
Speaker 9 (27:59):
Nis?
Speaker 7 (28:01):
Think Carl, do you know anything about that group playing
us ahead of us?
Speaker 3 (28:04):
Yeah, that's the slowest tree somebody ever seen in my life.
Speaker 14 (28:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 7 (28:08):
And the stars golfers too. None of them has hit
a good shot all day. Why are they blind?
Speaker 3 (28:15):
Can I ask a question. Have you been.
Speaker 11 (28:18):
As a matter of fact, they are blind though. That's
the brushy Wood Angels. Excuse me, did you say the
Brushywood Angels. Yeah, ex fire fighters from Station number twelve.
Speaker 3 (28:32):
The way they are.
Speaker 7 (28:32):
Playing, I wish they were golfers.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
Carl, I think he has how to know.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
I'll tell you what.
Speaker 2 (28:41):
Well, why do they call them the Brushywood Angels.
Speaker 11 (28:44):
Well, remember that due big fire we had a tea
clubhouse a couple of years ago. Of course I do, Carl,
gonna get on with it, man, Those three guys they
were in the crew that came to put the fire out, too.
Was the big fifty gallon drummer Kerosene, you know, one
of those Greek big boys in one of the outbuildings,
and the whole thing exploded. Shrapnel went everywhere, blinded all
three of them, blinded them. Yeah, but they still managed
(29:07):
to hold onto the hose, snuff the fire, and save
the clubhouse.
Speaker 7 (29:11):
Say did they do that?
Speaker 1 (29:13):
Yes? He did have another wind go ahead.
Speaker 11 (29:17):
The president of the club was so gratefully made them
honorary lifetime members. He said they could play the course
anytime they wanted for free. Hey, Well, listen, guys, I
got to get over and work on the greens at
number twelve. I'll see you guys.
Speaker 1 (29:28):
Later, sing a liner Carl Blind golfers, though.
Speaker 14 (29:33):
You know I fail kind of get you about bad
math in them all day. I think I'll call Ravind
Nicholson and get him to put them part fellows on
the prayer left over at church.
Speaker 6 (29:42):
You know, I have a friend who's an eye surgeon.
He's experimenting with some advanced transplant procedures. Maybe I'll give
him a call and see if there's anything he could
do for those fellows.
Speaker 3 (29:52):
Yeah, good idea. Ain't you got nothing to say for yourself?
Speaker 7 (29:57):
Yeah? Why can't they just play at night?
Speaker 10 (30:06):
We hope you've enjoyed John Boy and Billy Playhouse. Tune
up again next time when we'll hear dubsy FO.
Speaker 2 (30:36):
Good morning, a Big Show. It's on the radio.
Speaker 6 (30:39):
We get mails, emails from the Big Show dot Com.
Get a couple of here from Shane's a. This is
a Randy Randy. Have you seen the Dodge Tomahawk. There's
a concept by that was introduced on the Detroit Auto Show.
It's a four wheel motorcycle with a Dodge V ten engine.
Speaker 12 (30:58):
That's what the engine they put in the viper.
Speaker 6 (31:00):
Well, well that explains because it'll go to zero to
sixty and two point five seconds.
Speaker 1 (31:04):
So it's the viper cycle. It's a weird looking bike.
Speaker 15 (31:08):
It has four wheels, but they're two in the front
and two in the rear, obviously, and they're sat very
closely together. I'd say there may be eight ten inches apart.
So you still ride it like a motorcycle, a really
big motorcycle.
Speaker 10 (31:20):
A really big fast motorcycles on top speed of four
hundred miles per hour.
Speaker 12 (31:27):
So they've been told, man, that thing scoot.
Speaker 6 (31:31):
Yeah, said you should send them a suggestion for a tagline,
the Dodge Tomahawk. Hey, y'all watch this really Shane Stadler
won him handboys.
Speaker 12 (31:42):
All right, it's awesome looking vehicle.
Speaker 7 (31:44):
Though.
Speaker 6 (31:45):
Hey everybody, my name is Melanie. I'm thirty two young
years old, and this was my first time visiting your website.
Just wanted you to know I really enjoyed everything about it.
I've been a regular fan for some time, but never
thought to check out a radio station's website. I'm glad
I did, though, because it just seemed to make a
good thing even better. It was nice to be able
to see and relate to everyone just like they were
old time friends. This is the kind of radio relationship
(32:07):
that'll keep me in a lot of other friends fans
for a long time. Give it great work and genuine kindness.
Melanie led Better Mechanicsville, Virginia's and here's one. Could you
please settle a bet between two co workers and myself.
Somehow rumor got started that John Boy had divorced and
subsequently remarried. This came from one of my co workers
(32:28):
hearing a comment on the show one morning that John
Boy's girlfriend was in the studio with him during the show,
and then on another show, John Boy referred to his wife.
I said, I didn't think they were correct. I don't
recall any mention of John Boy divorcing. I told them
they probably misunderstood since that we're not listening for the
start of the show that morning, and there was most
likely a baby doll in with him that morning, and
(32:50):
the others Randy Billier Pillars were joking around and calling
her his girlfriend.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Who's correct? That's from Judy.
Speaker 12 (32:57):
Well, you'll know when that actually happens, because we'll never
hear from him.
Speaker 1 (33:00):
Again as far as I know. I'm still married. Yeah, yeah,
I hope this isn't.
Speaker 10 (33:06):
A number of like six o'clock this morning. When he left,
rumors started by my wife. And if he did get divorced,
believe me, he would not be able to afford to
get married again.
Speaker 1 (33:19):
Like I would if I could.
Speaker 6 (33:23):
I know she didn't marry me for my money, because
we started dating in high school when I was pumping gas.
Speaker 12 (33:28):
Yeah, and I know what for your looks, I'm still married.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
She's live.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
I got a great personality if she'd had.
Speaker 1 (33:40):
A buttload of you buy now.
Speaker 3 (33:43):
I'm all with him Big Box this year.
Speaker 10 (33:45):
All your favorites from four decades of The Big Show
ninety nine since he was fifteen for nine ninety nine
by him once to play him anywhere shopping bo bots
online right now at the Big Show dot Com or
a Big Show Stuff I phone. The number is eight
hundred and four to seven one stuff online services by
him Nick Kok.
Speaker 2 (34:00):
Have you missed any of The Big Show this morning?
Speaker 6 (34:02):
And you're here and all the John Boyebilly Late Risings
podcast up next? Maybe wherever you get your podcast, make
it easy subscribe to us with the free I heard
way to go out see you tomorrow.
Speaker 3 (34:14):
We love you, we mean it
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
The big show is on the radio.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Well till Wednesday morning.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
Here.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
All right, that's ringing man, Rav.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
You go first.
Speaker 1 (00:31):
That microphone right there, that's that's all. That's all.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
That's good morning, that job. Good morning, Randy.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
Hey, hey Jack, what up?
Speaker 3 (00:41):
Girl? You're keeping these straight people white?
Speaker 4 (00:44):
I mean, you're keeping straight?
Speaker 1 (00:46):
Yeah, it ain't easy.
Speaker 3 (00:48):
Raverend earnestly sincere yea.
Speaker 4 (00:49):
You know, the Lord will though us a curve every
once in a while, just to make sure we're paying attention.
Case in point, I was sitting in my office Sunday morning.
Speaker 5 (00:57):
Ms.
Speaker 4 (00:58):
Willa may Rude OFLFH, the head of the Sunday School,
comes in. She says, Rev, we got some no problem here.
One of the Sunday School teachers.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
Is out sick.
Speaker 4 (01:05):
I ain't got nobody to teach a lesson. I said, well,
that ain't no problem. My class, is it? She said,
second grade? I said, don't you worry about it. I'll
come down there and teach it myself. Heck, if a
preacher can't handle a bunch of second graders, he ain't
got no business in the pool pit at eleven o'clock.
Speaker 3 (01:18):
You know what I mean, what's the lesson?
Speaker 4 (01:20):
Supposed to be about missus. Rudolf says, well, we in
the middle of a ten week see reason the ten Commandments?
I said, well, you just leave everything to meet. So
I went down in the second grade classroom. It's about
a dozen children, and I said, okay, y'all, I'm gonna
be filling in this week. And I hey, y'all been
talking about the ten Commandments? Which one did y'all do
last week? One little girl said the one about not
killing people? I said, okay, I said number six. So
(01:42):
all right, this week we gonna look at number seven.
I thought to myself, oh, number seven, that's adultery. Now,
how am I gonna talk about that to a bunch
of second graders. Okay, Lord, I'm gonna need to bar
some of your wisdom on this one. So I clear
my thought. I said, Commandment number seven is thou shalt
not commit adultery? And saying this little boy in the
backing room raised his hand. I thought, oh, here we go.
(02:03):
So I said, uh, yes, young man, did you have
a question? He said, yeah, what does commit mean? Even
know what the law's going through? Your speaking of not
being sure what's happening? Ladies and gentlemen, here is gooling.
Speaker 6 (02:17):
Thank you very much, your day appreciated. Keep praying, baby,
he'll throw some Hebrew you will except right here, boys,
you believe in life after death? The boss asked one
of his employees, Yes, sir, you. Employee said, well there,
that makes everything just fine. Boss went on after you
left yesterday to go to your grandmother's funeral, she called.
The man goes to a shriek and says, doctor, my
(02:38):
wife's said faithful to me. Every evening she goes to
Larry's bar, picks up. Then, in fact, she sleeps with
anybody who ask her I'm going crazy?
Speaker 2 (02:45):
Well you think I should do? U?
Speaker 6 (02:47):
Doc says, all relaxed, Now take a deep breath, cob down,
do tell me exactly where is Larry's bas Old man
goes to the wizard, ask her if he could remove
a curse he been living with for the last forty years.
Wizards as well, baby, but you got to tell me
the exact words that were used to put the curse.
Odio o Bed says, without hesitation, I down, pronounce you bad?
Speaker 2 (03:07):
And why oh?
Speaker 6 (03:09):
John was hold his death bed gas pitifully kivvy one
last request here gas.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
His wife said, okay, John, what do you want? He said, six.
Speaker 6 (03:20):
Months after I die, I want you to marry Joe.
She said, I thought you hated Joe. He said, I do.
Man picked up a young woman at the bar, persuade
her to come back to this hotel. They relaxing afterwards.
He said, by the first man you ever made love to.
She looks at him. She said, maybe you look kind
of familiar. Man, don't see the Rabbi rab By, something
(03:43):
terrible's happening. I got to talk to you about it.
Rabb I said, what's wrong? Man said, my wife is
poisoning me. Rabbi shocked.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
How can that be?
Speaker 6 (03:49):
Said, I'm telling you I know she's poisoning me. Now
what should I do? Rabbi says, well, you just calm down.
Let me talk to her. I'll see what I can
find out. I'll let you know by the week later.
Rabbi calls back. He said, well, I talk to your
wife on the phone for about three hours. You won't
buy advice.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
I said, yeah.
Speaker 6 (04:03):
Rabb I said, take the poison. Two elderly gentlemen from
a retirement center. We're sitting on the bench under a tree.
One turns, other says Slim, I've eighty three years old. Down,
I'm just full of eggs and pains. I know you're
about my age.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
How do you feel? Slim says, hey.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
I feel just like a new board.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
Baby say yeah, no, heir.
Speaker 7 (04:22):
No teething.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
I think I just messed my pants.
Speaker 6 (04:27):
A fella is standing on the street corner. Ten dye
old kid walks up to a fella says, hey, Judah,
can I help you? He says, yeah, I'm lost, mister,
can you help me find by daddy? Fella says Why'll
give it a try?
Speaker 2 (04:37):
What's he like?
Speaker 7 (04:38):
Kid says?
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Bear and women with great big babes. Right for the
humor coaching today.
Speaker 6 (04:45):
Alright, Ernie, have I taken this infot good Morning to
make show us on the radio? Hang over your local
news weatheringsport.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
This is real.
Speaker 8 (04:58):
That is thick beetle, slayer of the Visicals, destroyer of
the Mongol, and.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
Aggravator of the Ottoman Empire.
Speaker 9 (05:08):
All listening to my two royal.
Speaker 8 (05:11):
Jesners, those gap toothed barbarians, John Boy and Billyard Old
Big show A rise, a loyer of beef, A rise
Duke of Ellington, a rise water of ten essence of
merd milk of Vacnisia.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
Good morning.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
There's a big show on the radio coming up on
gun Vince Quiz.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
He's the way if you join the Winterers, you just
take sea. You got it done. Let's see what they else.
You have an old Charo, I mean Charro, are you know?
And you make fun of people that can't say.
Speaker 2 (06:21):
What was what was Charro's little things? She always sid would.
Speaker 3 (06:25):
You cut you caut you you o?
Speaker 2 (06:26):
Huchi Kuchi kuchi Gucci kuchikoki.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
That's what that led.
Speaker 6 (06:31):
The fairy used to say, itchich. Now she wasn't the
one that had the fruit basket on her head.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
That's Carmen Miranda. Charo's one was always on a love boat.
Speaker 6 (06:42):
Oh she was on a next Tail commercial or one
of those yeah wireless phone commercials.
Speaker 10 (06:47):
One actually supposed to be a really good uh Spanish guitarist,
Is that right?
Speaker 1 (06:51):
Seriously?
Speaker 10 (06:51):
Yeah, they say she's very talented, but well she is
the Ichi Gucci Gucci thing kind of gets in the way.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
Well here does.
Speaker 6 (06:56):
She claims she was born in nineteen fifty one, but
there are reports that she petitioned a Spanish court to
legally subtract ten years from her birth certificate, thereby changing
her real year of birth from nineteen forty one to
nineteen fifty one. Now, her age shuffling has even confused
a few sources into incorrect reporting that she was born
(07:17):
in nineteen thirty one, while others claim as in nineteen
forty two. She says most people don't realize that she's
the person who actually introduced the nineteen ninety six Makarina
craze to America. Sam's Charro was performing it on cruise
ships as early as nineteen ninety four.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Huh.
Speaker 6 (07:34):
Charroo's real name is Maria Rosario Pilar Martinez. She's fluent
in English, Spanish, French, Italian and Japanese.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Whoever speaks those, they can't understand her either.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
KNEI watch canichi?
Speaker 4 (07:47):
What can eat you?
Speaker 5 (07:47):
Why?
Speaker 1 (07:49):
Wow?
Speaker 10 (07:49):
That's his charo Jarro Japanese speaking? Now, what if Charo
and James Brown did a duet?
Speaker 11 (07:58):
Wow?
Speaker 1 (08:00):
All head work? That you'd actually do? It sounds like
a street fight.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
And you having a birthday today? Happy birthday?
Speaker 6 (08:10):
Good morning again, the big show is on the radio
coming up. The easiest way for you to get your
name in this winner's hat because it's the current events quiz.
This is the easiest way for you to join the
winners down one eight hundred big show.
Speaker 10 (08:22):
Maybe that should be your new Daytona Yo?
Speaker 7 (08:27):
Was there?
Speaker 1 (08:27):
That works out?
Speaker 6 (08:29):
You billy?
Speaker 1 (08:29):
What we gonna deal with this morning?
Speaker 10 (08:31):
We're gonna talk about Madonna's latest project. Madonna's latest project.
All right here, it is easy way for you all
to win. What eight hundred big show you told? Free line,
We'll take nine and win with you. Next play lady,
(09:06):
good morning the.
Speaker 2 (09:06):
Big shows on your radio? Come on girls, okay?
Speaker 6 (09:17):
Qui dolor nine are contesting ont a fort Payne, Alabama?
Speaker 1 (09:26):
Is Carrie? Good morning?
Speaker 3 (09:27):
Carrie, Good morning?
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Joe boy.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Would you go to the prom with me?
Speaker 2 (09:31):
Oh yeah, I'd be delighted.
Speaker 7 (09:36):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (09:37):
Which one of you you think would get pigs blood
dumped on it?
Speaker 12 (09:41):
Which one do you think would show up at the
problem with pigs blood already on?
Speaker 3 (09:46):
It's not pigs blood, it's grilling.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
So all right, Carrie, listen to bit I see if
you can win baby?
Speaker 10 (09:52):
Okay, Well, Carrie Madonna has signed a deal with Penguin
Publishing to write a children's book. The pop star is
attempting to tone down her raunchy image since the birth
of her son Rocko. The new book will be aimed
at kids six and older and the working title is
A A Trip to the Big City B No more
(10:15):
war or C. Heather has two mommies, three daddies, and
a Puerto Rican guy with.
Speaker 7 (10:20):
A video.
Speaker 1 (10:24):
That has gotta be se.
Speaker 2 (10:32):
Yes, that's a good idea.
Speaker 1 (10:33):
Oh yeah, wait to go carry you in baby?
Speaker 2 (10:35):
Oh cool, Thank you, you're welcome.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Thank you for listening to us.
Speaker 6 (10:39):
Now you hold on, don't be afraid to give Jackie
your name address, and now we get in touch with you.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
Okay, prom seasons just around the corner. Good morning, everybody.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
You got a big showing a radio, right, big shoning
a radio. A let's take any newsletter sports.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
This is Spanky from the Yellow Rose.
Speaker 9 (11:02):
You're listening to the greatest morning show and recorded history
of broadcast radio, John Boy and Billie Big Show.
Speaker 3 (11:09):
How big is it?
Speaker 1 (11:11):
Bigger than my head?
Speaker 2 (11:13):
And that's big.
Speaker 3 (11:16):
There? Yeah, so b I read it and I'll pay
that tabby a seat, dead beat.
Speaker 6 (11:52):
Good morning, and you got the big show on the
radio coming up. We'll play stupid quiz. I'll play calling
on fourth and six grade level edgic cation material Marshie
Marshia hos a glass speaking of that random You're on
a clear diet?
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Is that what I heard you say? Now? That was yesterday.
Speaker 12 (12:06):
I'm better now, that's what the doc go on clear
diet said.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
What does that mean?
Speaker 12 (12:13):
Eat nothing? No, things you can see through.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
Eat things you can see through.
Speaker 12 (12:18):
So Swiss cheese, that's okay?
Speaker 10 (12:19):
No, no, and I stuck with holes in it. Parent
stuff like soup. Yeah, like broth, No, like vodka.
Speaker 1 (12:28):
Soup's only food. I think of a juice sea through broth.
Speaker 12 (12:31):
And you know I should have drank coffee and yellow
and what not.
Speaker 1 (12:35):
Yeah, h all right, don't mock my dogs because I
heard Steve off of your piece of beef jerky. It
was eating. No, I can't eat solid food.
Speaker 2 (12:48):
I was sick, okay.
Speaker 6 (12:51):
According to a new study, two out of three eight
nine year old New Zealanders can't locate their own country
on the Globe Actional Education Monitoring Project. Survey showed some
children put in New Zealand in the northern hemisphere, others
in North America, near to South America, or even Africa.
Well see American kids.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
Ain't that numb? So much for the smart kids in
New Zealand.
Speaker 12 (13:14):
Don't be selling American kids short.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
There are plenty dumb.
Speaker 10 (13:17):
Oh, here's a good one. A man in Yemen divorced
his first wife because she was loud and argumentative. His
new bride was a deaf and mute woman.
Speaker 1 (13:26):
There's your angle, dude, right there.
Speaker 10 (13:30):
She's said to be quiet and mild manner.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
We got to you, Johnny's get even wear one of
those collars. And then she talks to loud.
Speaker 2 (13:36):
About Oh.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
That's some stuff going on there, and hang on.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
Good morning to make show. It's on the radio.
Speaker 1 (14:14):
We're doing all ride this Wednesday morning. And now let's
spring an ike.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
Yo, what's up?
Speaker 9 (14:26):
I'd have been here sooner, but uh Patrick got to
brow him. He been gone for by two days. I
had to hitchhike in imagine that. Oh, welcome a man
like me. Welcome to another episode of as.
Speaker 2 (14:40):
For all the far why one you need for all
your so called Afro perspiration relationship?
Speaker 3 (14:48):
Did this?
Speaker 9 (14:49):
Did I met the Turner? That's what I'm talking about.
You remember that Jackie met the Turner. My sweet husband
and I have been married for fourteen years. We had
three beautiful cheerren ages twelve, eleven, and seven. The two
oldest our girls, and the youngest is a boy. We
both loved him with all our hearts, but they had
called the rift in our relation of shrimp when we
(15:12):
were first married. I greet my man at the door.
I have to hit hard day at work with a
big kids. Welcome him home with loving arms, Take his suit,
hang it up for him while I laid out some
comfortable clothes to wear. That I'd fix him a drink,
serve him a lovely.
Speaker 1 (15:27):
Then, of course you did.
Speaker 2 (15:28):
You're a woman, ain't you who?
Speaker 1 (15:31):
Today we play soft Senda's music and and charge each other.
That's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 3 (15:38):
Nine so wrapped up and our children.
Speaker 9 (15:40):
I hardly had time to say hello to him when
he comes to the door. By the time the cheering
are in bed, then a man cleaned up. I don't
have nothing left to give my man. Mister Turner, you
hear that, mister Turner, Please hit me. There are so
many young, beautiful women out there looking for a good man.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
I was lucky enough to.
Speaker 9 (15:59):
Find one of the few, and I don't want to
lose it. How can I save our love? Sad by
the sea? Did sad so? You too busy to get busy.
Speaker 7 (16:10):
Huh.
Speaker 9 (16:12):
Your young has got you so worn out that you
ain't got nothing left to wear your man out, ain't
no sense, and you're doing everything you can't happen. You
ain't no march toart. You want to save your love life.
All you got to do is figure out something to
do with your children, And always I got the answer.
Speaker 1 (16:31):
Let me preach on it.
Speaker 9 (16:33):
Option of number one. Sell your children. You don't want
to give them away. This is your chance to get
back some of that long green you done shelled out
raising them a little monster so far. But if you
already got attached to them and all emotionally like and
ain't interested in your reblake, see option in number two.
(16:54):
Option in number two, get a natty that's like uh
living in babysitter and don't go hide no chubbing neighborhood ska.
If you're gonna spend your harder benjaminins, y'all might as
well hire someone that's easy on the eyeballs and to
get high quality and a little price high and farder.
(17:18):
They're all kinds of fine looking holes MOBAs.
Speaker 1 (17:23):
Uh uh what you call Russian Indians.
Speaker 9 (17:25):
And then in the Hong Kong E's and the Swedishes
and all sorts of third worlds booty lichens, babysitters, and
since the day has just dying to get into this country,
and they don't care who that baby daddy is, They
just want the job. No, I know what you're saying.
Why would I bring you in some hot green cord
(17:46):
hoochie to strut around in front of my oh love
the pride Man.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
Allow me to uh a loose ridict.
Speaker 9 (17:52):
The afromentioned hoochi is Sue serves two porpoises.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
One she keep the.
Speaker 9 (17:58):
Kids out of your hair while you and mac Daddy
go two out of three falls, and two, when she's
parading around your humble a dove in that teddy and throng,
you gonna buy her your husband's long buried hard normal
emotions will errupturate and you will be swept away in
a tiradal wave of passion. After all, you gets more
(18:19):
fly win hornted than vinegar. And play your cards right
and you might be able to talk Old Mary Pimpin's
into what you call a moranue.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Troy.
Speaker 9 (18:32):
Now, if all heals fails, refer to option in number three.
Put your foot in the crack of someone backside. He
ain't gonna solve no merit of proflamations, but you sure
will feel better. This is ike, peace out, get more
fly with horned than vinegar. Good morning, and you got
(18:52):
the Big Show on the radio. More chances for you
to win coming up after your news, weather, and sports.
Speaker 6 (18:59):
Come on either day.
Speaker 13 (19:00):
Because you know, no Sicilian can refuse a request on
the day of his daughter's wedding. I shall grant your requests.
Someday I may ask a favorite of you, maybe a haircut.
Maybe I'll ask you to lay down your life for me.
Maybe I'll just ask you to listen to John Boy
and Billy on the Big Show. Would you rather wake
(19:20):
up with a horse's head or these two horses?
Speaker 1 (19:22):
Ask?
Speaker 6 (19:56):
Good morning, a big show is on the radio. We
got another contest to go today. That'd be stupid quiz.
I'll play calling nine and fourth fifth sixty grade level
educational material that's coming up in just a few minutes
sharp this morning. Alrighty, are you talking to them or you?
I'm just advice listening.
Speaker 4 (20:14):
I'm not.
Speaker 6 (20:15):
I don't feel that sharp to day, so this might
be a good chance for you to beat me. Come on,
so hang on we're gonna play in minutes. Good morning,
the Big Show is on the radio. For aging stupid
quiz A message for Stacy Lewis. Yes, uh, stay, said
John Boy. I still have this cape I slaved over
for weeks.
Speaker 7 (20:35):
Do you have yet?
Speaker 1 (20:35):
Let me know when to bring it to you. My
feelings are starting to get hurt.
Speaker 6 (20:39):
Let me know when you want it. Yes, Stacy Lewis
made my case. I'm sorry, Stacy, I got that email.
I forgot to say anything. Anytime, all right, anytime during
the week that the show's on.
Speaker 1 (20:51):
I'm here there now.
Speaker 3 (20:52):
Is that so hard?
Speaker 1 (20:53):
We don't know. We don't have to have a specific time.
Just bringing on in.
Speaker 3 (20:57):
You're playing with people's lives here.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
See why you're putting it off. Just find just the
right words.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
Yeah, as is Daisy.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
Yeah, I'm ready for my cape. Bringing on all right,
I said, wearing a stupid quiz. I still think the
fur coat with the hood.
Speaker 6 (21:17):
Yeah you know, well, Keith King brought me the cape
that his mama made me, like the NASCAR cape.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
But really lounging.
Speaker 12 (21:24):
But it's not the dress.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (21:26):
Yeah, it kind of lounging and it works better really
as an apron I think it really was an apron
and they just told me it was a cape because
it's got those apron strings now tied around.
Speaker 2 (21:35):
My neck just to cook on.
Speaker 5 (21:36):
It down around my neck and it pulls on my
throat when it goes down. It's not you know, that's
because it's tight around your neck. He was pulled around
your waist. It would be pulling on your waist.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
Anyways. Yeah, so I liked out. That's a good lounging cake.
But yeah, I look forward to my new cape cat
Stacy's right.
Speaker 12 (21:55):
Yeah, yeah, but the one they sent over to put
on the gift Horse fits a lot better.
Speaker 1 (22:00):
I wouldn't complain about it. Five Yeah, yeah, I'm not
complaining about that, just commenting. You can't get good.
Speaker 6 (22:06):
Capes anymore, all right, right now, Stupide quiz time he
got the lesson playing Marcy. Yeah sure, yes, okay, then
we need caller number nine one eight hundred big show
playing for the aforementioned prize baggage. Let's do it, Stupie
(22:30):
quiz playing next Good morning, a big show is on a.
Speaker 3 (23:05):
Radio, go ahead and asks me.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
Have you seen juniors? Great man?
Speaker 6 (23:26):
But that's me calling number nine, who's playing me in
the stupid quiz. That's Michael out of Huntsville, Alabama.
Speaker 1 (23:34):
Good morning, Michael, Good morning. How you doing. You're feeling
sharp this morning?
Speaker 9 (23:39):
Let me get another cup of coffee here?
Speaker 10 (23:40):
Yeah, no fair using stimulants to performance enhancers.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
Right, my got a touchdown phone, touch a number for me.
That's what you chime in? You go, I got the bell,
Marcia Marsha got the question me, Kay, Marsie.
Speaker 2 (23:59):
We're starting by let's go to sign. What do we
call a meteor that reaches the Earth's surface?
Speaker 1 (24:08):
Asteroid?
Speaker 4 (24:09):
No?
Speaker 1 (24:12):
Man, knew first you're about.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Hey, Michael's going for it.
Speaker 6 (24:17):
It's got to be a meteorite.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
That's right, right, right, it is right, Michael. Want to nothing, man,
Let's go to math class. I'm we'll have a little
review from yesterday. Oh no, all right, what do you
think I was playing anywhere?
Speaker 2 (24:34):
What is the smallest whole number that is divided by
both five and eight? O?
Speaker 1 (24:39):
O hey wait a minute, those are different numbers yesterday? Michael, Michael, Yes, forty.
I was paying fast written.
Speaker 12 (24:52):
Oh he had five over and eight and then a
line drawn. He was going to add five.
Speaker 6 (25:00):
Am I right out of bad skunking me? Two to
nothing of bats right near that one, I mean right
off the box.
Speaker 2 (25:10):
Okay, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
That's a whole.
Speaker 3 (25:13):
Writing it down.
Speaker 12 (25:16):
Well, we're two to nothing.
Speaker 7 (25:18):
Yeah, man.
Speaker 2 (25:22):
US and World History, US and world history?
Speaker 1 (25:26):
What US city was originally named New Amsterdam.
Speaker 7 (25:31):
New York.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
Who being around?
Speaker 4 (25:35):
It's just like that.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
This young is home getting through my first time getting.
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Over ten years.
Speaker 10 (25:46):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 6 (25:47):
Alright and dead, Let's take our break, get into John
o'bilt Playhouse, Classic Bit of the Morning starring Douve. Hang on,
good morning, the Big Show is on the radio, and
uh Classic Bit time. Yes, we're celebrating the old Buddy
Dub with playhouses that Dub start in coming up next,
hang out, good morning, A big shows on the radio
(26:34):
coming up Open line time. How's some emails with the
Big Show dot com?
Speaker 2 (26:39):
Right now Classic Mid of the Morning.
Speaker 6 (26:40):
We're celebrating Dub as he starred in our John Boy
Billy playhouses.
Speaker 10 (26:47):
Welcome to John Boy and Billy Playhouse. Today's episode three
Angry Men. As our story opens, Dub, General Tom and
their pal Doctor Beeper are on the seventh at Brushy
Wood Country Club.
Speaker 7 (27:02):
Has anybody seen my ball?
Speaker 3 (27:05):
Eyah? If I had a guess I'd say this over
in that bunker on the left.
Speaker 14 (27:09):
Oh, I tell you, having a rough time after that
second shot on number four, I didn't think he was
ever coming back.
Speaker 7 (27:15):
Yeah, I was so far back in the woods I
saw a skelting sitting on the bulldozer.
Speaker 6 (27:20):
That's Here's why Dubber Dubber? Is it a titleist? I
think this is it right over here?
Speaker 7 (27:26):
Thanks Doc. Okay, fella, here goes nothing.
Speaker 3 (27:28):
Hold him into dub It seemed three guys in front
of us here, just now getting to the green.
Speaker 7 (27:34):
Okay, those guys must be holding up us all day.
Speaker 6 (27:39):
Gentlemen, I've been a member of this club for almost
thirty years, and I've never seen such an aptitude on
the cars.
Speaker 7 (27:48):
There goes Carl to greenskeeping. Maybe he knows who they are. Hey, Carl,
come over here a second.
Speaker 1 (27:53):
H how's you going to Dubburgh.
Speaker 11 (27:55):
Good winning your region reship, good winning your doctor?
Speaker 9 (27:59):
Nis?
Speaker 7 (28:01):
Think Carl, do you know anything about that group playing
us ahead of us?
Speaker 3 (28:04):
Yeah, that's the slowest tree somebody ever seen in my life.
Speaker 14 (28:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 7 (28:08):
And the stars golfers too. None of them has hit
a good shot all day. Why are they blind?
Speaker 3 (28:15):
Can I ask a question. Have you been.
Speaker 11 (28:18):
As a matter of fact, they are blind though. That's
the brushy Wood Angels. Excuse me, did you say the
Brushywood Angels. Yeah, ex fire fighters from Station number twelve.
Speaker 3 (28:32):
The way they are.
Speaker 7 (28:32):
Playing, I wish they were golfers.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
Carl, I think he has how to know.
Speaker 1 (28:39):
I'll tell you what.
Speaker 2 (28:41):
Well, why do they call them the Brushywood Angels.
Speaker 11 (28:44):
Well, remember that due big fire we had a tea
clubhouse a couple of years ago. Of course I do, Carl,
gonna get on with it, man, Those three guys they
were in the crew that came to put the fire out, too.
Was the big fifty gallon drummer Kerosene, you know, one
of those Greek big boys in one of the outbuildings,
and the whole thing exploded. Shrapnel went everywhere, blinded all
three of them, blinded them. Yeah, but they still managed
(29:07):
to hold onto the hose, snuff the fire, and save
the clubhouse.
Speaker 7 (29:11):
Say did they do that?
Speaker 1 (29:13):
Yes? He did have another wind go ahead.
Speaker 11 (29:17):
The president of the club was so gratefully made them
honorary lifetime members. He said they could play the course
anytime they wanted for free. Hey, Well, listen, guys, I
got to get over and work on the greens at
number twelve. I'll see you guys.
Speaker 1 (29:28):
Later, sing a liner Carl Blind golfers, though.
Speaker 14 (29:33):
You know I fail kind of get you about bad
math in them all day. I think I'll call Ravind
Nicholson and get him to put them part fellows on
the prayer left over at church.
Speaker 6 (29:42):
You know, I have a friend who's an eye surgeon.
He's experimenting with some advanced transplant procedures. Maybe I'll give
him a call and see if there's anything he could
do for those fellows.
Speaker 3 (29:52):
Yeah, good idea. Ain't you got nothing to say for yourself?
Speaker 7 (29:57):
Yeah? Why can't they just play at night?
Speaker 10 (30:06):
We hope you've enjoyed John Boy and Billy Playhouse. Tune
up again next time when we'll hear dubsy FO.
Speaker 2 (30:36):
Good morning, a Big Show. It's on the radio.
Speaker 6 (30:39):
We get mails, emails from the Big Show dot Com.
Get a couple of here from Shane's a. This is
a Randy Randy. Have you seen the Dodge Tomahawk. There's
a concept by that was introduced on the Detroit Auto Show.
It's a four wheel motorcycle with a Dodge V ten engine.
Speaker 12 (30:58):
That's what the engine they put in the viper.
Speaker 6 (31:00):
Well, well that explains because it'll go to zero to
sixty and two point five seconds.
Speaker 1 (31:04):
So it's the viper cycle. It's a weird looking bike.
Speaker 15 (31:08):
It has four wheels, but they're two in the front
and two in the rear, obviously, and they're sat very
closely together. I'd say there may be eight ten inches apart.
So you still ride it like a motorcycle, a really
big motorcycle.
Speaker 10 (31:20):
A really big fast motorcycles on top speed of four
hundred miles per hour.
Speaker 12 (31:27):
So they've been told, man, that thing scoot.
Speaker 6 (31:31):
Yeah, said you should send them a suggestion for a tagline,
the Dodge Tomahawk. Hey, y'all watch this really Shane Stadler
won him handboys.
Speaker 12 (31:42):
All right, it's awesome looking vehicle.
Speaker 7 (31:44):
Though.
Speaker 6 (31:45):
Hey everybody, my name is Melanie. I'm thirty two young
years old, and this was my first time visiting your website.
Just wanted you to know I really enjoyed everything about it.
I've been a regular fan for some time, but never
thought to check out a radio station's website. I'm glad
I did, though, because it just seemed to make a
good thing even better. It was nice to be able
to see and relate to everyone just like they were
old time friends. This is the kind of radio relationship
(32:07):
that'll keep me in a lot of other friends fans
for a long time. Give it great work and genuine kindness.
Melanie led Better Mechanicsville, Virginia's and here's one. Could you
please settle a bet between two co workers and myself.
Somehow rumor got started that John Boy had divorced and
subsequently remarried. This came from one of my co workers
(32:28):
hearing a comment on the show one morning that John
Boy's girlfriend was in the studio with him during the show,
and then on another show, John Boy referred to his wife.
I said, I didn't think they were correct. I don't
recall any mention of John Boy divorcing. I told them
they probably misunderstood since that we're not listening for the
start of the show that morning, and there was most
likely a baby doll in with him that morning, and
(32:50):
the others Randy Billier Pillars were joking around and calling
her his girlfriend.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Who's correct? That's from Judy.
Speaker 12 (32:57):
Well, you'll know when that actually happens, because we'll never
hear from him.
Speaker 1 (33:00):
Again as far as I know. I'm still married. Yeah, yeah,
I hope this isn't.
Speaker 10 (33:06):
A number of like six o'clock this morning. When he left,
rumors started by my wife. And if he did get divorced,
believe me, he would not be able to afford to
get married again.
Speaker 1 (33:19):
Like I would if I could.
Speaker 6 (33:23):
I know she didn't marry me for my money, because
we started dating in high school when I was pumping gas.
Speaker 12 (33:28):
Yeah, and I know what for your looks, I'm still married.
Speaker 1 (33:33):
She's live.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
I got a great personality if she'd had.
Speaker 1 (33:40):
A buttload of you buy now.
Speaker 3 (33:43):
I'm all with him Big Box this year.
Speaker 10 (33:45):
All your favorites from four decades of The Big Show
ninety nine since he was fifteen for nine ninety nine
by him once to play him anywhere shopping bo bots
online right now at the Big Show dot Com or
a Big Show Stuff I phone. The number is eight
hundred and four to seven one stuff online services by
him Nick Kok.
Speaker 2 (34:00):
Have you missed any of The Big Show this morning?
Speaker 6 (34:02):
And you're here and all the John Boyebilly Late Risings
podcast up next? Maybe wherever you get your podcast, make
it easy subscribe to us with the free I heard
way to go out see you tomorrow.
Speaker 3 (34:14):
We love you, we mean it
Hosts And Creators
Billy James
Johnny "John Boy" Isley
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