March 7, 2024 • 33 mins
In this conversation, Karol interviews Bethany Mandel about her experiences with cancel culture and the challenges of writing a book. They discuss Bethany's favorite cancellations, including being labeled a neo-Nazi sympathizer and the infamous 'Grandma Killer' incident. They also touch on the importance of resilience and the impact of cancel culture on individuals. Bethany shares her thoughts on the solvability of societal problems and emphasizes the significance of marriage and family. The Karol Markowicz Show is part of the Clay Travis & Buck Sexton Podcast Network - new episodes debut every Monday & Thursday. Email Karol at KarolMarkowiczShow@gmail.com
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:07):
Hi, and welcome back to the Carol Markowitz Show on iHeartRadio.
I love hearing from listeners, so drop me a line
Carol Markowitz Show at gmail dot com or tweet at
me on x I don't know what that's called anymore,
but I'm at Carol Krol. So I got this email
recently that I'd like to read. A listener writes, I'm
(00:28):
a middle school teacher and mom of three young adults.
My question is, what are some tangible ways adults can
help instill appreciation and pride in our country in young people.
Like Ted Cruz said on the show, entertainment is a
huge influence, but there's a small number of rich conservatives
who can purchase a production company. What are some ideas
(00:48):
for average Americans like me? End quote Now, I love
this question. Today is actually the one year anniversary of
the release of our book, Stolen Youth Bethany Mendel, who'll
actually be interviewing on this episode, and I chronicled all
the ways children get indoctrinated by the Left. It's not
just at schools, it's in your doctor's office, it's in
(01:11):
your library, and so on. I've spent the last year
touring just a ton for the book and talking to
audiences all over the country, and I've been asked a
variation of this question a lot how to talk to
teenagers or young adults about a variety of topics, including patriotism.
The crazy thing that I've learned in the last year
(01:32):
is just how rarely parents speak their values to their kids.
Some things just seem too obvious to stay out loud,
so they never do. Recently, the hedge funder Bill Ackman,
who has been fighting the good fight with Harvard to
make them reconsider some of their really terrible dipolicies, said
that his daughter went to Harvard and came out a Marxist.
(01:56):
Now I don't know anything about their family, but I
just wonder how often he talked to her about the
amazing and just incredible benefits of capitalism. I don't know
how my kids will turn out or what bad ideas
they will have, but I can assure you they won't
be Communists. I can say definitively that they will love
America because it's something we talk about often in our house.
(02:20):
They know that their two immigrant parents are proud Americans,
and they know my story of how easily I could
have had a completely different and demonstratively worse life. It
sounds obvious, but say the words to your kids, tell
them about what matters to you. Don't let other people
fill in their values. Make sure that they know what
(02:43):
you stand for and what you believe. Don't think that
because you live in a red area, for example, that
they will pick it up by Osmosis, I encountered this
over and over again. People who lived in red regions
of the country just thought they were safe. They thought
that these crazy ideas is that Bethany and I cover
in the book, or something that was happening in New
(03:03):
York or San Francisco. And what they found, of course,
was that it's happening everywhere, and anybody with any access
to your child has the ability to impartner their values
on them. Don't let that happen. Make it your values
that they hear about firsts that they hear about most.
They can challenge those values. They can argue with you,
but make sure you're having the conversation. This is not
(03:26):
a show about politics. It is a show about life,
and you are your child's best guide on how to live.
But you have to actually provide that guidance. Don't shy
away from saying the words out loud. In our family,
we talk often about how important it is to get
married and have a family. We discuss how lucky we
(03:48):
feel to be American. We talk about the importance of
preserving our Jewish faith. We cover capitalism being the best
financial system by far, and so on. We don't just
assume they'll know have the conversations, say the words. Coming
up next and interview with Bethany Mendel. Join us after
the break. Welcome back to the Carol Markowitz Show on iHeartRadio.
(04:15):
My guest today is the co author my co author
of the book Stolen Youth, Bethany Mendel. She's also the
homeschooling mom of six. Hi, Bethany, you this is funny.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
I know, I know, so do we just like talk?
I saw your post the other day from one of
your kids and he said like, so you just get
paid to talk to your friends basically, And I was like,
that's a pretty sweet gig. And I told my k
I told my kids that we were doing this day
and they were like, but it's not really a podcast.
You're just talking to your friend. And I said, well,
(04:49):
we'll record it for other people. To listen to and
they found that strange.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Yeah, that's really what it is. And people, for some
reason enjoy the conversations. So you know this is going
to be a good one. I mean, you and I
have had a lot of interviews together, but obviously I've
never interviewed you, so.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
And I don't have a podcast to like inflict upon
you yet.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
You know, who knows, who knows what will happen in
the future. So I guess let's start off with you've
been canceled a lot, which one was your favorite?
Speaker 2 (05:19):
I'm getting canceled right now, did you know?
Speaker 1 (05:21):
No, I didn't know that. What's happening now?
Speaker 2 (05:23):
So I'm running for a local school board seat and
I'm a registered Democrat. Oh I mean sure, so I
said on something by it I'm a Democrat because I am.
I am a Democrat registered and so I'm getting canceled
for it. Go away, please, I'm getting canceled because I'm
(05:45):
faking that I'm a Democrat. Like, but I thought that
I could identify with whatever I want. Sure, Actually, like legally,
if you look at my roater registration, it says Democratic
right there. So I'm getting canceled right now. But I'm getting.
I'm getting a lot of like recanceled because I just
announced that I'm running for school, so it's like canceled.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
It's funny. Yeah, right, yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
It's the greatest hits. So I think my favorite cancelation
it's tied. Actually one of them is I recall them
in the summer of twenty seventeen, and I think it's
called like the Case for Befriending Neo Nazis or something.
People take screenshots of the headline so often you'd think
I'd remember the headline off the top of my head.
It's something like why we should befriend neo Nazis, and
(06:31):
the whole column is like completely uncharacteristic of me. Actually,
and I said, like, maybe we should just be nice
to people.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Going through a nice phase at the time. You messed
me up at the time because you were like, you know,
we chose our careers, and these people who yell at
us on the internet, we shouldn't go like find their
mothers and tell them about it. But like, and I
was like for a while, I was with you, and
then I was like, Bethany's totally wrong. We should completely
go find these people's mothers and tell them about it,
(07:00):
So I think.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
We should find their mothers. But I have found in
my conversations with the very the very limited conversations whenever
I have the bandwidth and I like really get into it,
people their stories are dark. Like these are people who
are really going through some stuff. People who take the
time to sit and go through your Facebook and comment
on every single one of your pictures. You're a garbage human.
(07:21):
You should kill yourself have really dark things going on
in their lives.
Speaker 1 (07:25):
I can't I can't excuse them. You've had some dark moments.
I've had some dark moments. I don't go around. You know.
Cat Timp had this point one time that she was like,
I have never been watching TV and thought, I have
to go tell that person that they suck, you know,
like hold on, but let me go find them on
the internet and tell them that they're ugly.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
Like I think that's I think that's because we're resilient,
happy people and these people are just dark and sad.
But that brings me to my other favorite cancelation, which
was recent actually, and someone dug up a tweet where
I like sort of flippantly said I killed my mom
and I think it was like you know in the
days of Twitter, when like things were taken out of context.
Maybe I was watching a show that everyone was watching it.
(08:07):
I don't know, but I said it very flippantly and
everyone was like, oh my god. And I mean I
took her off life support when I was sixteen because
she was terminally ill and in multi organ failure. And
I talk about that in our book and at the time,
so I don't know if you know this actually, So
I wrote that that chapter and then I never looked
(08:28):
at it again. I couldn't. I couldn't. I was like,
very difficult to write. I wrote it, and then when
we got the edits back, I made Seth, my husband,
do that chapter for me. I was like, I will
do everything else. I mean, you remember the turnaround time.
It was so bad, and I was like, you know,
that's the chapter that Seth is going to do. And
so I didn't look at that chapter until we got
(08:50):
the Galley copies and I looked at it and I
leafed through it and I looked at Seth and I
was like, this kind of goes on a little too long,
Like this story goes on for like two pages too long.
I really could have cut this and maybe you should
have as the editor. And he was like, I'm not
cutting that right, right, Like that's your story. And I
think everyone felt like it went on for two pages
(09:11):
too long, but no one felt like they could say that.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
Really, I know I didn't think. So you were telling
a story and I think that it needed to be told.
And again, this is the darkness that you have not
allowed to overshadow your life, right, and you've become a
resilient person, and you the book is about resiliency, is
about raising resilient children. It all bit so you know,
(09:33):
it's just going back to your neo Nazi thing too.
It's a it was funny. I know, I know you
remember this, but basically Alexandrio Casio Cortez made the exact
same argument that you did, like three years later, and
she was like, you know, a lot of these neo
Nazis are really messed up, and like maybe if we
showed them some kindness and we like tried to like
(09:54):
talk to them and kind of direct them back onto
the path. Because when you have somebody that has got
involved with a dangerous ideology, for example, if it's somebody
in your family, if you cut them off they're only
going to get more aligned with that ideology. And so
the idea of you know, don't talk to these people
(10:15):
like it doesn't apply to anything except neo Nazis too.
Like obviously the left things we should talk to everyone.
I think they think, you know, Israel should be talking
to Hamas like right now. But neo Nazis are the
only only exception to them. Maybe we could fix them
rule yep.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Yeah. So anyway, those are my two favorite cancelations. That
I killed my mother and that I'm a neo Nazi sympathizer.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
I can't believe that my favorite cancelation of yours didn't
even come up, which was obviously Grandma Killer.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
You know, a good one.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
That was such a good one. Yeah, it was. It
was during the pandemic. It was the fall. I'm sorry,
it was the spring, a spring of twenty twenty May.
And you said, I don't care if I get called
Grandma killer. We need to reopen things, and you know,
your library is going to be closed and your zoo
is going to be closed, and all of this doesn't
end up suffering. Were you right about that, Bethany?
Speaker 2 (11:05):
I was right, Carol. Thanks for mentioning that So my
local zoo has a nonprofit arm that ran every all
the conservation efforts, all of the education stuff. They had
summer camps, they had homeschool classes which we took part in.
So the nonprofit arm of the zoo closed and it's
a shell of its former self.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
Wow. If just somebody had seen that coming.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
You know, someone had seen that coming. But you know,
unfortunately we had to keep the outdoor zoo closed for
seventeen months.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
I think I just had to be safe, Bethany, you
had to have safe outside. Has anybody and I know
the answer to this, but has anybody apologized to you? No?
Grandma Killer trended nationally and I believe Seth printed you
out magnets with that. Yeah, that's a good loving husband.
(11:57):
You know, your cancelation onto a magnet that you could
put on the fridge.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
It's so funny because I didn't know. I was at
I think it was at like the chiropractor or something,
and I was with a kid there and someone kept
on repeatedly calling me. It was someone random too, and
I finally picked up and I was like, what could
you possibly have to tell me? And they're like, are
you okay? And I'm like, was there a nuke that
(12:24):
I'm unaware of? Like did something happen in Washington? Like what?
And they told me. I'm like, this is not a
reason to call me six months.
Speaker 1 (12:31):
It's this happens to me all the time. Click.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
And then I kept on getting texts and like people
sent me screenshots of the trending thing and I was like, oh, well,
I have to go to Amazing Savings and get some
birthday party stuff, so after that I will pay attention
to this cancelation. But yeah, no, that was a good one.
That was a good one. And then obviously the woke video,
(12:55):
which is like this backshot that was brutal.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Wait, I wasn't on that.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
I no, I know, no, no, but it's like you
and I our book. That one. That one actually that
was brutal. That was the only one that hurt because
that was my fault. Everyone else I was. I was right,
and that one. I was like exhausted and totally thrown
off by her because she was such a bee. She
was talking smack right before we started taping, and I
(13:23):
was exhausted and I just like had a like freeze.
I think it was an anxiety attack. Honestly, I think
I had an anxiety attack.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
So just to sum it up for my listeners, so
have no It's okay. It's so. Our book is called
Stolen Youth. It was about the woke war on children
and the way that kids get brainwashed in every aspect
of American life, you know, not just at schools, but
at the doctor's office, at the library, et cetera. And
Bethany did an interview with The Hill where the very
(13:52):
leftist hostess asked her to define woke and she had
a public brain fart, which I feel like lots of
people have I mentioned this, but I one of our
early interviews was I did with Guy Benson. I forgot
the name of the book, and the key thing to
note here when I forgot the name of my own book,
I was holding the book in my hand. I could
have just glanced down. Instead, I was like, the book
(14:15):
is called and it happens. It happens. Plus you had
a newborn, which when I have a newborn, my brain
is mush. I don't know how you did any of it.
I'll also say that, and I've talked about this on
the show. But the book was a success by every measure.
We you know, made bestseller lists all of that, but
(14:36):
that time was just a very stressful time. I still
am recovering from that time. It hasn't been a year yet.
You know, people say books are like children. It's like childbirth.
You forget whatever. I have not forgotten that March April
May time period, and then you know, the book tour
went on and on. But those three months just I'm
(14:58):
literally still getting over it. It was still like childbirths.
Still getting over it.
Speaker 2 (15:03):
Yeah, and it was comforting to me because you it
feels like you have your life together more than I
do as a general rule of thumb these disappearances. But
I remember you saying like, this is really hard, and
I was like, no, really is it? Thank you because
and I remember you saying that. Mollie Hemingway also said
(15:24):
that to you.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
She said it was like her first book was one
of the most difficult years of her life. Yeah. I
feel that.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
Yeah, No, and it was. It was all part of
that too, Like it was. I had the sixth baby there,
my fifth and my sixth they're seventeen months apart, so
he was really hard. My fourth is a sleepwalker. She
was having like a really bad sleepwalking week that week,
and so I had oh and she had broken her
arm the night before I gave birth. So that whole
(15:53):
like postpartum period of which the book fell still, you
know when people are normally on maternity leave, was like
super anxious already and super sleep deprived. And it's funny
because people say to me all the time, like I
don't know how you do it. I'm like, there is
video evidence of how I do it, or.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
I always say poorly, I do it poorly.
Speaker 2 (16:12):
Sometimes sometimes it really blows up in my face, like
when I trend nationally, and like people throw it in
my face literally daily, and it doesn't it doesn't hurt anymore,
Like I'm able to step back. And first of all,
she turned into a raging, psychotic anti semite. She was
very nice of her because now I don't feel so bad, right,
But it was like it was really hard for a
(16:34):
couple months because I would just wake up in the
middle of the night, re re trying to litigate it,
kind of like this is what I said, this is
what I'm trying about. But in that moment, you can
see it in my eyes, like it's a total deer
in the headlights brain fart.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
And like, obviously I had heard you define well in
previous interest. Obviously you've done it.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
You know, Yeah, I mean I called you after that
hysterically crying, and I don't cry. I don't think you've
ever heard me cry. I've seen that.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
I was like, nobody's going to see this.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
No, I knew. I knew from this second. And this
was also the problem too. I say it in the video,
I say this is going to go viral. I knew,
I knew, I knew this is one of those moments,
and instead of stopping my brain and trying to make
it restart, I was already catastrophizing how it was going
to go viral. And I was right.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
This was also I think like two or three days
after our book party in New York was crashed by
protesters where they threw drinks and books at you, mostly
because I wasn't in the vicinity met me and Steve Forbes, right,
you and mister Forbes bb it right, And you had
been holding your baby moments before and obviously again very
(17:52):
stressful time. I mean I remember other things that I
cracked my tooth at Benchpiro's, like studio had to like
fly to my dentists. It didn't have one in Florida
yet I had, like, just.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
I can I tell you that moment made me feel
so much better about my life. Also when you cracked
your tooth, because I'm like, that was such a Bethany
thing to do, because.
Speaker 1 (18:11):
Like, I ate the stupid kind bar in the green
room and cracked my tooth on it, and yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:17):
I was also I was again, I was very anxious
in that time period, and so I was sitting there
and you were just silent, and you were very quiet
the rest of the day, and I was like, it's
Carol mad at me. I do know.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
I was quiet because like my tooth, it made me.
Speaker 2 (18:32):
Feel so much better when you said, like this is
what happened, Like, Okay, first of all, she's human, and
second of all, she's not mad at me. Okay, but
that was like that was where my brain was, like
I was in like full on catastrophizing mode.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
We're going to take a quick break and be right
back on the Carol Marcowitch Show. I just don't know
what to compare it to other than childbirth, like the
hazy days of those days, and it's so everything went
so well in general. You know again the book was
a success, Like what am I so stressed out about?
Speaker 2 (19:05):
By my way?
Speaker 1 (19:06):
So why am I still stressed out about it today?
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Like? What is that? And by the way, that cancelation
we got mentioned in the New York Times, the Washington Post,
like I feel like I see myself, oh one hundred percent,
I free myself on the fire. And because of that,
every single woman who saw it, and I've heard this
from so many people, many of whom don't agree with us.
(19:30):
When they saw it, they were like, oh, that sister's tired.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
And then when they heard I had a however many
week old I had and he was my sixth in
nine years, they were like, wow, okay, and so but
that pushed us into this conversation of people were talking
for a full week. What is the definition of woke?
How do we describe this? Right? It led to think
pieces in Daily Beast, Washington Posts, New York Times, all
(19:56):
these things, and they mentioned that dumb broad and he
was the co author of the books Stolen Youth. Right.
Speaker 1 (20:02):
It helped our sales for sure, And there's no doubt
about it. I mean, all press is good press. Sorry
it fucked you up.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
Bethany well that's what I feel right now. So Rolling
Stone is writing a hippiece about me right now about
I think about how I'm running as a Democrat, and
I'm like, well again, so yeah, but I am a Democrat.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
Yeah, so prove that I'm not.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
Like I mean, I had no voter registration. I've been
registered as a Democrat since twenty twenty one. And by
the way, that lost me a speaking engagement to some
like Young Republican, not Young republic something Republican, like a
Women's Republican group or something. They like they were going
to pay me, and then they sent me the contract
and meet the idiot. I read the contract. I'm like, well, actually,
(20:43):
I'm actually a registered Democrat and you're like what right,
And I was like, well, I like to participate in democracy,
and that's how you do that in my county. So
I'm registered as a Democrat as a result. And they're like, sorry,
we can't have you come to speak. I'm like that's fine,
I'm rather my vote count in my county. The county
executive won by less than one hundred votes, and so.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
The primary is the election in your county? Yeah, And
it was a New York City very similar.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
Yeah, it really matters. And so I'm I will be
a registered Democrat for as long as I live here,
but therefore I am a registered Democrat.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
It's amazing that you could declare yourself a different gender
or no gender or both.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
My three year old could do it.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
Yeah, but you can't be like, you can't declare yourself
a different party because you don't fit in and your
ideas don't fit in with this party. What how is that?
Speaker 2 (21:36):
I thought I could identify as however I want. Yeah,
And I thought that they were defenders of democracy. I
am participating in local democracy here under the terms that
they have set our democracy, no right, and I'm playing
by their rules. They set the rules of This is
how you participate in democracy in Montgomery County, Maryland, where
eighty five percent of people voted for Joseph Biden. Okay,
(21:59):
so I'm playing by your rules and I'm a Democrat.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Yep, that's yeah, that's just you know how it goes.
So you've been canceled all these times, you have a
best selling book, you have six children, you're married to Seth.
Do you feel like you've made it?
Speaker 2 (22:15):
No? No, and it like let's rewind like thirty seconds
ago to where I said, you chipping your tooth made
me feel better about myself. I don't. I mean, if
I like, I could take the camera and just swivel
it like I guess it would be three sixty and
then come right back to me and people are like, oh,
that sister has a messy home. I'm like, yes, I do.
There was there was a profile written about me in
(22:36):
Deseret News right before I started writing there, and my
soon to be editor like spent a day in my
house talking to us, and the whole first part of
the column is about how messy my house is nice,
and I was like, and it's funny because she mentions
how there's like a nasal aspirator on my front steps.
And I read that and I was like, that's where
(22:58):
that is. I have been looking for that nasal aspirator.
Thank you so much, Jennifer Graham for I because the
mess is so overpowering that I didn't even I didn't
even see it anymore, but I've been looking for that
nasal aspirator.
Speaker 1 (23:12):
I remember lindsay, I don't know how to pronounce her
last namefield Byefield. Yeah, I came and uh organized your
house didn't last.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
No, no, never else. No, she she comes. Since she
had children, she's stopped coming over and doing that because
she has her own life to do. And though she
just had her second and she's not working as much,
I've been trying to put her on other unpaid projects,
like can I build this website for me?
Speaker 1 (23:36):
Can you do this for me?
Speaker 2 (23:36):
Can you make my graphics for whatever? She's actually helping
me a little bit with. Yeah, she has. But I
should make her come over and I'll play with her
children and she'll we call it lindsay my life.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
That's so smart. Yeah, I mean, I feel like anybody
can use she should. Actually she should market that now
lindsaying your life, because I don't need organization help, but
I feel like I do need some other lindsaying kind
of stuff done. So that might be.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Really, she's amazing.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
She might she might be onto something there.
Speaker 2 (24:04):
Yeah, No, she's amazing. She has like the superpower of
just she she watched I spent a day on the
hill with a hostage family in like late October, and
I left her here with all six of my children,
and she was eight months pregnant and she had her
her toddler here and I came home and she was like,
I'm so sorry. I only cleaned your kitchen. It's like, okay, well,
(24:30):
all right, I guess I'll have to.
Speaker 1 (24:31):
Live with it and not pay you this time like
all the other times. But thank you.
Speaker 2 (24:37):
She she lived with me for a couple months when
she had first moved to DC. She was working the
night shift somewhere, like in some news working there or something.
I don't really know. I should know, but I don't,
and so she basically had pull her opposite schedules of me.
I rarely saw her. Sorry, New York almost came out.
I really saw her saw her. I rarely saw her,
(25:00):
And it was like this magical cleaning fairy in my house.
And my roommate was a little annoyed at the fact
that someone was sleeping there. But then she realized she
never saw Lindsay. And then when she got her own
place and moved out, my roommate she din it at
the same time we did. Yeah, and my room was like,
so that was all her And I was like, it
appears so yes, I have amazing done nothing in three months.
(25:24):
So she she's grateful that I helped her for those
three months, but like hopefully she doesn't listen to your
podcast because of jobs.
Speaker 1 (25:30):
I mean, I'm definitely going to send her this episode,
but yes, other than that, I hope she does listen
to my podcast.
Speaker 2 (25:36):
She probably does. She she's like the superhero who does everything,
so I'm sure she listens to your podcast already.
Speaker 1 (25:41):
So do you see another book in your future? Because
I am nowhere near that. I'm like at that, you know,
I think just had a baby, and like, why are
you to me about another baby? A bunch of babies
all together? So you're probably crazier, So go ahead.
Speaker 2 (25:55):
So I do, And I have an idea and I
invited you to it. Just for the record, I invited you.
I did.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
Never doing this again, I don't know, it's like you know, yeah,
but I want to hear you know.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Your friends, so I can't. I don't want to no,
no g to say because I feel.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Like I shouldn't say, right, no, don't say your idea,
but just in general, you're you're going to do this again, like.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
I think so? I think so so. I I've been
talking to our agent about it and he's down with it.
But there's like two books coming out that might be similar,
and so we're waiting to see if those are two
similar before I think we set forward, or maybe that's
not what we're waiting for, And maybe I should just
text him more frequently. I just like, I have so
many things going on that I haven't been responsible about it. Yeah, so,
(26:39):
I mean, I don't know, maybe maybe we're not waiting.
What are we doing?
Speaker 1 (26:42):
Keith?
Speaker 2 (26:43):
Can you hit me up? I don't know.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
I'll send him the episode. Also, I'm just going to
email it out to everybody we talk about. Yeah, there
you go, So switching gears. A question that I ask
a lot of people, and that a lot of people
everybody ask everybody who comes on my show is what
do you think is our largest societal problem? And do
you think it's solvable?
Speaker 2 (27:02):
So I told you my answer would be unsurprising. It's
the birth crisis. It's the marriage and the birth crisis.
People are very lonely. And I think that you and
I have extraordinarily happy, healthy marriages.
Speaker 1 (27:21):
Yeah, Russian Russian superstition. You can't just say that.
Speaker 2 (27:23):
I mean, unless somebody croaks, I think we're in safe territory.
But that's rare. And so, I mean, I think it's
it's getting more rare to get married, but it's also
rare to be in a relationship with someone you consider
to be your best friend, which I know Shai is
for you, and that is for me. Soulmatesmates, That's incredible
(27:48):
and special. Katrina Trinco just wrote a column for The
Daily Signal for Valentine's Day. I love her, She's so sweet.
She was like a pre kid's friend. And then we
don't talk enough, which is a shame because we live
both in Washington. We should hang out more, but I
don't see anyone ever.
Speaker 1 (28:07):
So it kid, six kids, seventy eight jobs. I've got
a few things going on.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Yeah, exactly. So she she wrote this beautiful column for
the Daily Signal. It's basically like the TLDR is, it's
rough out there, and I know it's rough out there.
I don't want to be single in this environment. It's
so hard, and so I think there's so many people
out there who want to meet their person, and there's
(28:33):
a lot of people out there who have settled, who
have been like, well, I guess this is it, and
this is this is as good as I'm going to get.
And I know a lot of people who have settled
and a lot of people who I'm like, I wonder
how long that will last, because it won't last people
who don't like their spouse, people who don't respect their spouse. Yeah,
(28:53):
And I mean, like it's not to say that, like
marriage is always easy and perfect. My marriage has not been.
And I like, we had a really rough go in
the beginning of our marriage before we had kids. And
we had a rough go I don't know how five years,
six years ago now, when he was at the post
and just working non stop. His commute was so bad,
(29:16):
we just like did not We did not communicate, and
I faked it until I made it both times. Right
in those rough moments, I was like, I really don't
like you, but I'm going to like force myself to
be here. Yeah, be here and be encouraging and be
loving even though I do want to kiss you right now.
I don't like you very much right now, but you
(29:37):
fake it until you make it.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
Let's have another baby.
Speaker 2 (29:39):
No, that was before we had kids, and I wasn't
sure I'm we're going to stay married. Yeah, I would
like I would take my wedding ring off and like
walk around and be like, I wonder what this feels like?
Could I be single again.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Wow?
Speaker 2 (29:49):
Is this Yeah? Yeah, it was really bad, especially before
we had the kids, and then we went to couples
counseling and we we I learned how to communicate, right,
I mean, we can't.
Speaker 1 (30:03):
Blame Seth for any of it. Obviously, he's like perfect
and yeah, unfortunately sorry for you, but that's just the
tesn't matter.
Speaker 2 (30:11):
The annoying thing about him is that he's too nice.
That is, that is the only thing I will ever
say about him, and sometimes.
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Doesn't realize that in the acknowledgments.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
Yes, yes, he's nice, and sometimes you want him to
hold a grudge, yeah, and he doesn't.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
Yeah, I mean, but I feel like we need people
like him around. You know. I'm going to have him
on the show also and make him like tell us
why he's so good, how he.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
Could be good too, but he's so modest. But I
would love to watch that.
Speaker 1 (30:38):
Well, Bethany. Obviously, you and I can keep this going
for days at a time and we have. But end
here with your best tip for my listeners on how
they can improve their lives. How do they Bethany their
lives in a positive way?
Speaker 2 (30:53):
I think I think you have to be passionate about
everything possible, Like I don't half asked things very much.
There's so many things I want to do that I
take on too many things. But ultimately, at the end
of the day, it's my personal life that is my
priority and that brings me joy. I homeschool the kids,
(31:16):
everyone's home with me, and like, could I be making
more money? Could I have more time to clean my house? Yes?
I could, or I could have fun, And so I
just I. I think the biggest lesson that I took
for my parents' deaths in my teens, which according to Twitter,
I killed my mom probably both whatever, Yeah, I mean
(31:40):
I killed both of them, But they don't know the
details about my dad yet that I'll see that for
the second book. A vague tweet that about how I
was the reason why my dad it's that terrible. That's
what I'm going to get canceled.
Speaker 1 (31:52):
That's the next cancelation. Oh no, get tie into the
next book so that it hits right up the right time.
Speaker 2 (32:00):
You know, I don't know, man, I mean, someone's gonna
take a clip of that and be like, oh, she
was joking about Howard dug himself. Because ever, It's fine,
this is the problem with podcasting with a friend, by
the way, because you forget that someone is taping it,
and you're like, oh, this is gonna be seen by
other people. Anyway, Live your life like because it's short
(32:21):
and it's beautiful and it's wonderful, and don't don't get
dragged into like self pity and self sorrow. I definitely
could have after my parents died when I was sixteen
and nineteen years old, especially given with my father how
he left this earth. But life is such a gift
(32:42):
and I'm just I'm so grateful. I mean, I don't
care about any of the professional stuff like best selling
book like super cool. Don't get me wrong, but like
I really like my kids, I really like my husband.
I'm so lucky. I get to just like wake up
every day and like do this and this is, by
the way, like part of my job and my life
is like I'm going to talk to my friend on
(33:04):
Skype and then we'll post it on the internet and
people will listen to it, like what a scamus all is,
What a beautiful life. I love it.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
It's amazing. She is Bethany Mendel. Read her amazing book
Stolen Youth. Go buy like ten copies right now. Thank
you so much.
Speaker 2 (33:18):
For me, so they should buy it from me. I
still have some leftover.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
It doesn't get our numbers up, so no, don't buy
it from you. Thank you so much. Bethany Mendel, thank
you so much for joining us on The Carol Markowitz Show.
Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.
Hi, and welcome back to the Carol Markowitz Show on iHeartRadio.
I love hearing from listeners, so drop me a line
Carol Markowitz Show at gmail dot com or tweet at
me on x I don't know what that's called anymore,
but I'm at Carol Krol. So I got this email
recently that I'd like to read. A listener writes, I'm
(00:28):
a middle school teacher and mom of three young adults.
My question is, what are some tangible ways adults can
help instill appreciation and pride in our country in young people.
Like Ted Cruz said on the show, entertainment is a
huge influence, but there's a small number of rich conservatives
who can purchase a production company. What are some ideas
(00:48):
for average Americans like me? End quote Now, I love
this question. Today is actually the one year anniversary of
the release of our book, Stolen Youth Bethany Mendel, who'll
actually be interviewing on this episode, and I chronicled all
the ways children get indoctrinated by the Left. It's not
just at schools, it's in your doctor's office, it's in
(01:11):
your library, and so on. I've spent the last year
touring just a ton for the book and talking to
audiences all over the country, and I've been asked a
variation of this question a lot how to talk to
teenagers or young adults about a variety of topics, including patriotism.
The crazy thing that I've learned in the last year
(01:32):
is just how rarely parents speak their values to their kids.
Some things just seem too obvious to stay out loud,
so they never do. Recently, the hedge funder Bill Ackman,
who has been fighting the good fight with Harvard to
make them reconsider some of their really terrible dipolicies, said
that his daughter went to Harvard and came out a Marxist.
(01:56):
Now I don't know anything about their family, but I
just wonder how often he talked to her about the
amazing and just incredible benefits of capitalism. I don't know
how my kids will turn out or what bad ideas
they will have, but I can assure you they won't
be Communists. I can say definitively that they will love
America because it's something we talk about often in our house.
(02:20):
They know that their two immigrant parents are proud Americans,
and they know my story of how easily I could
have had a completely different and demonstratively worse life. It
sounds obvious, but say the words to your kids, tell
them about what matters to you. Don't let other people
fill in their values. Make sure that they know what
(02:43):
you stand for and what you believe. Don't think that
because you live in a red area, for example, that
they will pick it up by Osmosis, I encountered this
over and over again. People who lived in red regions
of the country just thought they were safe. They thought
that these crazy ideas is that Bethany and I cover
in the book, or something that was happening in New
(03:03):
York or San Francisco. And what they found, of course,
was that it's happening everywhere, and anybody with any access
to your child has the ability to impartner their values
on them. Don't let that happen. Make it your values
that they hear about firsts that they hear about most.
They can challenge those values. They can argue with you,
but make sure you're having the conversation. This is not
(03:26):
a show about politics. It is a show about life,
and you are your child's best guide on how to live.
But you have to actually provide that guidance. Don't shy
away from saying the words out loud. In our family,
we talk often about how important it is to get
married and have a family. We discuss how lucky we
(03:48):
feel to be American. We talk about the importance of
preserving our Jewish faith. We cover capitalism being the best
financial system by far, and so on. We don't just
assume they'll know have the conversations, say the words. Coming
up next and interview with Bethany Mendel. Join us after
the break. Welcome back to the Carol Markowitz Show on iHeartRadio.
(04:15):
My guest today is the co author my co author
of the book Stolen Youth, Bethany Mendel. She's also the
homeschooling mom of six. Hi, Bethany, you this is funny.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
I know, I know, so do we just like talk?
I saw your post the other day from one of
your kids and he said like, so you just get
paid to talk to your friends basically, And I was like,
that's a pretty sweet gig. And I told my k
I told my kids that we were doing this day
and they were like, but it's not really a podcast.
You're just talking to your friend. And I said, well,
(04:49):
we'll record it for other people. To listen to and
they found that strange.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Yeah, that's really what it is. And people, for some
reason enjoy the conversations. So you know this is going
to be a good one. I mean, you and I
have had a lot of interviews together, but obviously I've
never interviewed you, so.
Speaker 2 (05:07):
And I don't have a podcast to like inflict upon
you yet.
Speaker 1 (05:10):
You know, who knows, who knows what will happen in
the future. So I guess let's start off with you've
been canceled a lot, which one was your favorite?
Speaker 2 (05:19):
I'm getting canceled right now, did you know?
Speaker 1 (05:21):
No, I didn't know that. What's happening now?
Speaker 2 (05:23):
So I'm running for a local school board seat and
I'm a registered Democrat. Oh I mean sure, so I
said on something by it I'm a Democrat because I am.
I am a Democrat registered and so I'm getting canceled
for it. Go away, please, I'm getting canceled because I'm
(05:45):
faking that I'm a Democrat. Like, but I thought that
I could identify with whatever I want. Sure, Actually, like legally,
if you look at my roater registration, it says Democratic
right there. So I'm getting canceled right now. But I'm getting.
I'm getting a lot of like recanceled because I just
announced that I'm running for school, so it's like canceled.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
It's funny. Yeah, right, yeah.
Speaker 2 (06:09):
It's the greatest hits. So I think my favorite cancelation
it's tied. Actually one of them is I recall them
in the summer of twenty seventeen, and I think it's
called like the Case for Befriending Neo Nazis or something.
People take screenshots of the headline so often you'd think
I'd remember the headline off the top of my head.
It's something like why we should befriend neo Nazis, and
(06:31):
the whole column is like completely uncharacteristic of me. Actually,
and I said, like, maybe we should just be nice
to people.
Speaker 1 (06:38):
Going through a nice phase at the time. You messed
me up at the time because you were like, you know,
we chose our careers, and these people who yell at
us on the internet, we shouldn't go like find their
mothers and tell them about it. But like, and I
was like for a while, I was with you, and
then I was like, Bethany's totally wrong. We should completely
go find these people's mothers and tell them about it,
(07:00):
So I think.
Speaker 2 (07:00):
We should find their mothers. But I have found in
my conversations with the very the very limited conversations whenever
I have the bandwidth and I like really get into it,
people their stories are dark. Like these are people who
are really going through some stuff. People who take the
time to sit and go through your Facebook and comment
on every single one of your pictures. You're a garbage human.
(07:21):
You should kill yourself have really dark things going on
in their lives.
Speaker 1 (07:25):
I can't I can't excuse them. You've had some dark moments.
I've had some dark moments. I don't go around. You know.
Cat Timp had this point one time that she was like,
I have never been watching TV and thought, I have
to go tell that person that they suck, you know,
like hold on, but let me go find them on
the internet and tell them that they're ugly.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
Like I think that's I think that's because we're resilient,
happy people and these people are just dark and sad.
But that brings me to my other favorite cancelation, which
was recent actually, and someone dug up a tweet where
I like sort of flippantly said I killed my mom
and I think it was like you know in the
days of Twitter, when like things were taken out of context.
Maybe I was watching a show that everyone was watching it.
(08:07):
I don't know, but I said it very flippantly and
everyone was like, oh my god. And I mean I
took her off life support when I was sixteen because
she was terminally ill and in multi organ failure. And
I talk about that in our book and at the time,
so I don't know if you know this actually, So
I wrote that that chapter and then I never looked
(08:28):
at it again. I couldn't. I couldn't. I was like,
very difficult to write. I wrote it, and then when
we got the edits back, I made Seth, my husband,
do that chapter for me. I was like, I will
do everything else. I mean, you remember the turnaround time.
It was so bad, and I was like, you know,
that's the chapter that Seth is going to do. And
so I didn't look at that chapter until we got
(08:50):
the Galley copies and I looked at it and I
leafed through it and I looked at Seth and I
was like, this kind of goes on a little too long,
Like this story goes on for like two pages too long.
I really could have cut this and maybe you should
have as the editor. And he was like, I'm not
cutting that right, right, Like that's your story. And I
think everyone felt like it went on for two pages
(09:11):
too long, but no one felt like they could say that.
Speaker 1 (09:13):
Really, I know I didn't think. So you were telling
a story and I think that it needed to be told.
And again, this is the darkness that you have not
allowed to overshadow your life, right, and you've become a
resilient person, and you the book is about resiliency, is
about raising resilient children. It all bit so you know,
(09:33):
it's just going back to your neo Nazi thing too.
It's a it was funny. I know, I know you
remember this, but basically Alexandrio Casio Cortez made the exact
same argument that you did, like three years later, and
she was like, you know, a lot of these neo
Nazis are really messed up, and like maybe if we
showed them some kindness and we like tried to like
(09:54):
talk to them and kind of direct them back onto
the path. Because when you have somebody that has got
involved with a dangerous ideology, for example, if it's somebody
in your family, if you cut them off they're only
going to get more aligned with that ideology. And so
the idea of you know, don't talk to these people
(10:15):
like it doesn't apply to anything except neo Nazis too.
Like obviously the left things we should talk to everyone.
I think they think, you know, Israel should be talking
to Hamas like right now. But neo Nazis are the
only only exception to them. Maybe we could fix them
rule yep.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
Yeah. So anyway, those are my two favorite cancelations. That
I killed my mother and that I'm a neo Nazi sympathizer.
Speaker 1 (10:37):
I can't believe that my favorite cancelation of yours didn't
even come up, which was obviously Grandma Killer.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
You know, a good one.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
That was such a good one. Yeah, it was. It
was during the pandemic. It was the fall. I'm sorry,
it was the spring, a spring of twenty twenty May.
And you said, I don't care if I get called
Grandma killer. We need to reopen things, and you know,
your library is going to be closed and your zoo
is going to be closed, and all of this doesn't
end up suffering. Were you right about that, Bethany?
Speaker 2 (11:05):
I was right, Carol. Thanks for mentioning that So my
local zoo has a nonprofit arm that ran every all
the conservation efforts, all of the education stuff. They had
summer camps, they had homeschool classes which we took part in.
So the nonprofit arm of the zoo closed and it's
a shell of its former self.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
Wow. If just somebody had seen that coming.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
You know, someone had seen that coming. But you know,
unfortunately we had to keep the outdoor zoo closed for
seventeen months.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
I think I just had to be safe, Bethany, you
had to have safe outside. Has anybody and I know
the answer to this, but has anybody apologized to you? No?
Grandma Killer trended nationally and I believe Seth printed you
out magnets with that. Yeah, that's a good loving husband.
(11:57):
You know, your cancelation onto a magnet that you could
put on the fridge.
Speaker 2 (12:02):
It's so funny because I didn't know. I was at
I think it was at like the chiropractor or something,
and I was with a kid there and someone kept
on repeatedly calling me. It was someone random too, and
I finally picked up and I was like, what could
you possibly have to tell me? And they're like, are
you okay? And I'm like, was there a nuke that
(12:24):
I'm unaware of? Like did something happen in Washington? Like what?
And they told me. I'm like, this is not a
reason to call me six months.
Speaker 1 (12:31):
It's this happens to me all the time. Click.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
And then I kept on getting texts and like people
sent me screenshots of the trending thing and I was like, oh, well,
I have to go to Amazing Savings and get some
birthday party stuff, so after that I will pay attention
to this cancelation. But yeah, no, that was a good one.
That was a good one. And then obviously the woke video,
(12:55):
which is like this backshot that was brutal.
Speaker 1 (13:00):
Wait, I wasn't on that.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
I no, I know, no, no, but it's like you
and I our book. That one. That one actually that
was brutal. That was the only one that hurt because
that was my fault. Everyone else I was. I was right,
and that one. I was like exhausted and totally thrown
off by her because she was such a bee. She
was talking smack right before we started taping, and I
(13:23):
was exhausted and I just like had a like freeze.
I think it was an anxiety attack. Honestly, I think
I had an anxiety attack.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
So just to sum it up for my listeners, so
have no It's okay. It's so. Our book is called
Stolen Youth. It was about the woke war on children
and the way that kids get brainwashed in every aspect
of American life, you know, not just at schools, but
at the doctor's office, at the library, et cetera. And
Bethany did an interview with The Hill where the very
(13:52):
leftist hostess asked her to define woke and she had
a public brain fart, which I feel like lots of
people have I mentioned this, but I one of our
early interviews was I did with Guy Benson. I forgot
the name of the book, and the key thing to
note here when I forgot the name of my own book,
I was holding the book in my hand. I could
have just glanced down. Instead, I was like, the book
(14:15):
is called and it happens. It happens. Plus you had
a newborn, which when I have a newborn, my brain
is mush. I don't know how you did any of it.
I'll also say that, and I've talked about this on
the show. But the book was a success by every measure.
We you know, made bestseller lists all of that, but
(14:36):
that time was just a very stressful time. I still
am recovering from that time. It hasn't been a year yet.
You know, people say books are like children. It's like childbirth.
You forget whatever. I have not forgotten that March April
May time period, and then you know, the book tour
went on and on. But those three months just I'm
(14:58):
literally still getting over it. It was still like childbirths.
Still getting over it.
Speaker 2 (15:03):
Yeah, and it was comforting to me because you it
feels like you have your life together more than I
do as a general rule of thumb these disappearances. But
I remember you saying like, this is really hard, and
I was like, no, really is it? Thank you because
and I remember you saying that. Mollie Hemingway also said
(15:24):
that to you.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
She said it was like her first book was one
of the most difficult years of her life. Yeah. I
feel that.
Speaker 2 (15:31):
Yeah, No, and it was. It was all part of
that too, Like it was. I had the sixth baby there,
my fifth and my sixth they're seventeen months apart, so
he was really hard. My fourth is a sleepwalker. She
was having like a really bad sleepwalking week that week,
and so I had oh and she had broken her
arm the night before I gave birth. So that whole
(15:53):
like postpartum period of which the book fell still, you
know when people are normally on maternity leave, was like
super anxious already and super sleep deprived. And it's funny
because people say to me all the time, like I
don't know how you do it. I'm like, there is
video evidence of how I do it, or.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
I always say poorly, I do it poorly.
Speaker 2 (16:12):
Sometimes sometimes it really blows up in my face, like
when I trend nationally, and like people throw it in
my face literally daily, and it doesn't it doesn't hurt anymore,
Like I'm able to step back. And first of all,
she turned into a raging, psychotic anti semite. She was
very nice of her because now I don't feel so bad, right,
But it was like it was really hard for a
(16:34):
couple months because I would just wake up in the
middle of the night, re re trying to litigate it,
kind of like this is what I said, this is
what I'm trying about. But in that moment, you can
see it in my eyes, like it's a total deer
in the headlights brain fart.
Speaker 1 (16:50):
And like, obviously I had heard you define well in
previous interest. Obviously you've done it.
Speaker 2 (16:57):
You know, Yeah, I mean I called you after that
hysterically crying, and I don't cry. I don't think you've
ever heard me cry. I've seen that.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
I was like, nobody's going to see this.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
No, I knew. I knew from this second. And this
was also the problem too. I say it in the video,
I say this is going to go viral. I knew,
I knew, I knew this is one of those moments,
and instead of stopping my brain and trying to make
it restart, I was already catastrophizing how it was going
to go viral. And I was right.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
This was also I think like two or three days
after our book party in New York was crashed by
protesters where they threw drinks and books at you, mostly
because I wasn't in the vicinity met me and Steve Forbes, right,
you and mister Forbes bb it right, And you had
been holding your baby moments before and obviously again very
(17:52):
stressful time. I mean I remember other things that I
cracked my tooth at Benchpiro's, like studio had to like
fly to my dentists. It didn't have one in Florida
yet I had, like, just.
Speaker 2 (18:02):
I can I tell you that moment made me feel
so much better about my life. Also when you cracked
your tooth, because I'm like, that was such a Bethany
thing to do, because.
Speaker 1 (18:11):
Like, I ate the stupid kind bar in the green
room and cracked my tooth on it, and yeah.
Speaker 2 (18:17):
I was also I was again, I was very anxious
in that time period, and so I was sitting there
and you were just silent, and you were very quiet
the rest of the day, and I was like, it's
Carol mad at me. I do know.
Speaker 1 (18:28):
I was quiet because like my tooth, it made me.
Speaker 2 (18:32):
Feel so much better when you said, like this is
what happened, Like, Okay, first of all, she's human, and
second of all, she's not mad at me. Okay, but
that was like that was where my brain was, like
I was in like full on catastrophizing mode.
Speaker 1 (18:45):
We're going to take a quick break and be right
back on the Carol Marcowitch Show. I just don't know
what to compare it to other than childbirth, like the
hazy days of those days, and it's so everything went
so well in general. You know again the book was
a success, Like what am I so stressed out about?
Speaker 2 (19:05):
By my way?
Speaker 1 (19:06):
So why am I still stressed out about it today?
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Like? What is that? And by the way, that cancelation
we got mentioned in the New York Times, the Washington Post,
like I feel like I see myself, oh one hundred percent,
I free myself on the fire. And because of that,
every single woman who saw it, and I've heard this
from so many people, many of whom don't agree with us.
(19:30):
When they saw it, they were like, oh, that sister's tired.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
And then when they heard I had a however many
week old I had and he was my sixth in
nine years, they were like, wow, okay, and so but
that pushed us into this conversation of people were talking
for a full week. What is the definition of woke?
How do we describe this? Right? It led to think
pieces in Daily Beast, Washington Posts, New York Times, all
(19:56):
these things, and they mentioned that dumb broad and he
was the co author of the books Stolen Youth. Right.
Speaker 1 (20:02):
It helped our sales for sure, And there's no doubt
about it. I mean, all press is good press. Sorry
it fucked you up.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
Bethany well that's what I feel right now. So Rolling
Stone is writing a hippiece about me right now about
I think about how I'm running as a Democrat, and
I'm like, well again, so yeah, but I am a Democrat.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
Yeah, so prove that I'm not.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
Like I mean, I had no voter registration. I've been
registered as a Democrat since twenty twenty one. And by
the way, that lost me a speaking engagement to some
like Young Republican, not Young republic something Republican, like a
Women's Republican group or something. They like they were going
to pay me, and then they sent me the contract
and meet the idiot. I read the contract. I'm like, well, actually,
(20:43):
I'm actually a registered Democrat and you're like what right,
And I was like, well, I like to participate in democracy,
and that's how you do that in my county. So
I'm registered as a Democrat as a result. And they're like, sorry,
we can't have you come to speak. I'm like that's fine,
I'm rather my vote count in my county. The county
executive won by less than one hundred votes, and so.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
The primary is the election in your county? Yeah, And
it was a New York City very similar.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
Yeah, it really matters. And so I'm I will be
a registered Democrat for as long as I live here,
but therefore I am a registered Democrat.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
It's amazing that you could declare yourself a different gender
or no gender or both.
Speaker 2 (21:26):
My three year old could do it.
Speaker 1 (21:28):
Yeah, but you can't be like, you can't declare yourself
a different party because you don't fit in and your
ideas don't fit in with this party. What how is that?
Speaker 2 (21:36):
I thought I could identify as however I want. Yeah,
And I thought that they were defenders of democracy. I
am participating in local democracy here under the terms that
they have set our democracy, no right, and I'm playing
by their rules. They set the rules of This is
how you participate in democracy in Montgomery County, Maryland, where
eighty five percent of people voted for Joseph Biden. Okay,
(21:59):
so I'm playing by your rules and I'm a Democrat.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Yep, that's yeah, that's just you know how it goes.
So you've been canceled all these times, you have a
best selling book, you have six children, you're married to Seth.
Do you feel like you've made it?
Speaker 2 (22:15):
No? No, and it like let's rewind like thirty seconds
ago to where I said, you chipping your tooth made
me feel better about myself. I don't. I mean, if
I like, I could take the camera and just swivel
it like I guess it would be three sixty and
then come right back to me and people are like, oh,
that sister has a messy home. I'm like, yes, I do.
There was there was a profile written about me in
(22:36):
Deseret News right before I started writing there, and my
soon to be editor like spent a day in my
house talking to us, and the whole first part of
the column is about how messy my house is nice,
and I was like, and it's funny because she mentions
how there's like a nasal aspirator on my front steps.
And I read that and I was like, that's where
(22:58):
that is. I have been looking for that nasal aspirator.
Thank you so much, Jennifer Graham for I because the
mess is so overpowering that I didn't even I didn't
even see it anymore, but I've been looking for that
nasal aspirator.
Speaker 1 (23:12):
I remember lindsay, I don't know how to pronounce her
last namefield Byefield. Yeah, I came and uh organized your
house didn't last.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
No, no, never else. No, she she comes. Since she
had children, she's stopped coming over and doing that because
she has her own life to do. And though she
just had her second and she's not working as much,
I've been trying to put her on other unpaid projects,
like can I build this website for me?
Speaker 1 (23:36):
Can you do this for me?
Speaker 2 (23:36):
Can you make my graphics for whatever? She's actually helping
me a little bit with. Yeah, she has. But I
should make her come over and I'll play with her
children and she'll we call it lindsay my life.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
That's so smart. Yeah, I mean, I feel like anybody
can use she should. Actually she should market that now
lindsaying your life, because I don't need organization help, but
I feel like I do need some other lindsaying kind
of stuff done. So that might be.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Really, she's amazing.
Speaker 1 (24:02):
She might she might be onto something there.
Speaker 2 (24:04):
Yeah, No, she's amazing. She has like the superpower of
just she she watched I spent a day on the
hill with a hostage family in like late October, and
I left her here with all six of my children,
and she was eight months pregnant and she had her
her toddler here and I came home and she was like,
I'm so sorry. I only cleaned your kitchen. It's like, okay, well,
(24:30):
all right, I guess I'll have to.
Speaker 1 (24:31):
Live with it and not pay you this time like
all the other times. But thank you.
Speaker 2 (24:37):
She she lived with me for a couple months when
she had first moved to DC. She was working the
night shift somewhere, like in some news working there or something.
I don't really know. I should know, but I don't,
and so she basically had pull her opposite schedules of me.
I rarely saw her. Sorry, New York almost came out.
I really saw her saw her. I rarely saw her,
(25:00):
And it was like this magical cleaning fairy in my house.
And my roommate was a little annoyed at the fact
that someone was sleeping there. But then she realized she
never saw Lindsay. And then when she got her own
place and moved out, my roommate she din it at
the same time we did. Yeah, and my room was like,
so that was all her And I was like, it
appears so yes, I have amazing done nothing in three months.
(25:24):
So she she's grateful that I helped her for those
three months, but like hopefully she doesn't listen to your
podcast because of jobs.
Speaker 1 (25:30):
I mean, I'm definitely going to send her this episode,
but yes, other than that, I hope she does listen
to my podcast.
Speaker 2 (25:36):
She probably does. She she's like the superhero who does everything,
so I'm sure she listens to your podcast already.
Speaker 1 (25:41):
So do you see another book in your future? Because
I am nowhere near that. I'm like at that, you know,
I think just had a baby, and like, why are
you to me about another baby? A bunch of babies
all together? So you're probably crazier, So go ahead.
Speaker 2 (25:55):
So I do, And I have an idea and I
invited you to it. Just for the record, I invited you.
I did.
Speaker 1 (26:01):
Never doing this again, I don't know, it's like you know, yeah,
but I want to hear you know.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
Your friends, so I can't. I don't want to no,
no g to say because I feel.
Speaker 1 (26:12):
Like I shouldn't say, right, no, don't say your idea,
but just in general, you're you're going to do this again, like.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
I think so? I think so so. I I've been
talking to our agent about it and he's down with it.
But there's like two books coming out that might be similar,
and so we're waiting to see if those are two
similar before I think we set forward, or maybe that's
not what we're waiting for, And maybe I should just
text him more frequently. I just like, I have so
many things going on that I haven't been responsible about it. Yeah, so,
(26:39):
I mean, I don't know, maybe maybe we're not waiting.
What are we doing?
Speaker 1 (26:42):
Keith?
Speaker 2 (26:43):
Can you hit me up? I don't know.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
I'll send him the episode. Also, I'm just going to
email it out to everybody we talk about. Yeah, there
you go, So switching gears. A question that I ask
a lot of people, and that a lot of people
everybody ask everybody who comes on my show is what
do you think is our largest societal problem? And do
you think it's solvable?
Speaker 2 (27:02):
So I told you my answer would be unsurprising. It's
the birth crisis. It's the marriage and the birth crisis.
People are very lonely. And I think that you and
I have extraordinarily happy, healthy marriages.
Speaker 1 (27:21):
Yeah, Russian Russian superstition. You can't just say that.
Speaker 2 (27:23):
I mean, unless somebody croaks, I think we're in safe territory.
But that's rare. And so, I mean, I think it's
it's getting more rare to get married, but it's also
rare to be in a relationship with someone you consider
to be your best friend, which I know Shai is
for you, and that is for me. Soulmatesmates, That's incredible
(27:48):
and special. Katrina Trinco just wrote a column for The
Daily Signal for Valentine's Day. I love her, She's so sweet.
She was like a pre kid's friend. And then we
don't talk enough, which is a shame because we live
both in Washington. We should hang out more, but I
don't see anyone ever.
Speaker 1 (28:07):
So it kid, six kids, seventy eight jobs. I've got
a few things going on.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Yeah, exactly. So she she wrote this beautiful column for
the Daily Signal. It's basically like the TLDR is, it's
rough out there, and I know it's rough out there.
I don't want to be single in this environment. It's
so hard, and so I think there's so many people
out there who want to meet their person, and there's
(28:33):
a lot of people out there who have settled, who
have been like, well, I guess this is it, and
this is this is as good as I'm going to get.
And I know a lot of people who have settled
and a lot of people who I'm like, I wonder
how long that will last, because it won't last people
who don't like their spouse, people who don't respect their spouse. Yeah,
(28:53):
And I mean, like it's not to say that, like
marriage is always easy and perfect. My marriage has not been.
And I like, we had a really rough go in
the beginning of our marriage before we had kids. And
we had a rough go I don't know how five years,
six years ago now, when he was at the post
and just working non stop. His commute was so bad,
(29:16):
we just like did not We did not communicate, and
I faked it until I made it both times. Right
in those rough moments, I was like, I really don't
like you, but I'm going to like force myself to
be here. Yeah, be here and be encouraging and be
loving even though I do want to kiss you right now.
I don't like you very much right now, but you
(29:37):
fake it until you make it.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
Let's have another baby.
Speaker 2 (29:39):
No, that was before we had kids, and I wasn't
sure I'm we're going to stay married. Yeah, I would
like I would take my wedding ring off and like
walk around and be like, I wonder what this feels like?
Could I be single again.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Wow?
Speaker 2 (29:49):
Is this Yeah? Yeah, it was really bad, especially before
we had the kids, and then we went to couples
counseling and we we I learned how to communicate, right,
I mean, we can't.
Speaker 1 (30:03):
Blame Seth for any of it. Obviously, he's like perfect
and yeah, unfortunately sorry for you, but that's just the
tesn't matter.
Speaker 2 (30:11):
The annoying thing about him is that he's too nice.
That is, that is the only thing I will ever
say about him, and sometimes.
Speaker 1 (30:15):
Doesn't realize that in the acknowledgments.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
Yes, yes, he's nice, and sometimes you want him to
hold a grudge, yeah, and he doesn't.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
Yeah, I mean, but I feel like we need people
like him around. You know. I'm going to have him
on the show also and make him like tell us
why he's so good, how he.
Speaker 2 (30:33):
Could be good too, but he's so modest. But I
would love to watch that.
Speaker 1 (30:38):
Well, Bethany. Obviously, you and I can keep this going
for days at a time and we have. But end
here with your best tip for my listeners on how
they can improve their lives. How do they Bethany their
lives in a positive way?
Speaker 2 (30:53):
I think I think you have to be passionate about
everything possible, Like I don't half asked things very much.
There's so many things I want to do that I
take on too many things. But ultimately, at the end
of the day, it's my personal life that is my
priority and that brings me joy. I homeschool the kids,
(31:16):
everyone's home with me, and like, could I be making
more money? Could I have more time to clean my house? Yes?
I could, or I could have fun, And so I
just I. I think the biggest lesson that I took
for my parents' deaths in my teens, which according to Twitter,
I killed my mom probably both whatever, Yeah, I mean
(31:40):
I killed both of them, But they don't know the
details about my dad yet that I'll see that for
the second book. A vague tweet that about how I
was the reason why my dad it's that terrible. That's
what I'm going to get canceled.
Speaker 1 (31:52):
That's the next cancelation. Oh no, get tie into the
next book so that it hits right up the right time.
Speaker 2 (32:00):
You know, I don't know, man, I mean, someone's gonna
take a clip of that and be like, oh, she
was joking about Howard dug himself. Because ever, It's fine,
this is the problem with podcasting with a friend, by
the way, because you forget that someone is taping it,
and you're like, oh, this is gonna be seen by
other people. Anyway, Live your life like because it's short
(32:21):
and it's beautiful and it's wonderful, and don't don't get
dragged into like self pity and self sorrow. I definitely
could have after my parents died when I was sixteen
and nineteen years old, especially given with my father how
he left this earth. But life is such a gift
(32:42):
and I'm just I'm so grateful. I mean, I don't
care about any of the professional stuff like best selling
book like super cool. Don't get me wrong, but like
I really like my kids, I really like my husband.
I'm so lucky. I get to just like wake up
every day and like do this and this is, by
the way, like part of my job and my life
is like I'm going to talk to my friend on
(33:04):
Skype and then we'll post it on the internet and
people will listen to it, like what a scamus all is,
What a beautiful life. I love it.
Speaker 1 (33:10):
It's amazing. She is Bethany Mendel. Read her amazing book
Stolen Youth. Go buy like ten copies right now. Thank
you so much.
Speaker 2 (33:18):
For me, so they should buy it from me. I
still have some leftover.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
It doesn't get our numbers up, so no, don't buy
it from you. Thank you so much. Bethany Mendel, thank
you so much for joining us on The Carol Markowitz Show.
Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.
Host
Karol Markowicz
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