November 9, 2023 • 26 mins
In this episode, Karol discusses the controversy surrounding YouTube personality Mr. Beast's philanthropic efforts in Africa and the criticism he faced for monetizing his good deeds. Author Faith Moore joins to discuss his new book "Christmas Karol", which explores societal expectations and the balance between work and family life. The conversation challenges the narrative that women should prioritize their careers over spending time with their children and emphasizes the importance of making choices that align with personal values and desires. Moore also highlights the devaluation of children in society and the need to prioritize family. The Karol Markowicz Show is part of the Clay Travis & Buck Sexton Podcast Network - new episodes debut every Monday & Thursday.
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Hi, and welcome back to the Carol Markowitz Show on iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
There was a story this week about a YouTube personality
named mister Beast building one hundred water wells across Africa.
These wells will deliver clean drinking water to half.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
A million people who need it.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
And because it's twenty twenty three and because the Internet exists,
people are mad about it. They're mad because there are
already are charities that build wells in Africa, and mister
Beasts did it more successfully than they have. I mean,
how dare he cut off their grift and stop a
bunch of people getting paid on the way to building
that well. They're also mad because his success makes the
(00:43):
Kenyan government, for example, look bad. Which listen, they should
look bad. They do look bad. This internet personality, Taylor
Lorenz says, mister Beast is monetizing kindness because he does
these good deeds and then puts them on the Internet
and people watch it and that makes him rich. Meanwhile,
Taylor and much of the media monetizes all kinds of
(01:06):
horrible stuff. Taylor docks as people she doesn't like and
still thinks she's the good guy, and media in general,
I mean monetizes, creating strife between us, and so much more.
I'll take mister beast monetizing of good deeds any day.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Thanks.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
This isn't the first time mister Beast has hit some
controversy in this way. In fact, he was kind of
ready for it this time, saying I know I'm going
to get canceled, but I'm building these wells in Africa.
A few months ago he paid for surgery for a
number of blind people to be able to see again,
and this was called ablest, Like, how do you even
(01:42):
know that blind people want.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
To see again?
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Mister Beast's you terrible person? It's all absurd. Yes, it's
part of.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
A complex I call the problem.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
With everything complex. These people need to find the bad
in any situation. Obviously we can just ignore them, yes,
but the truth is that their way of looking at
the world is seeping into our lives too. Do you
ever hear someone say something, you know, rather innocuous and think, ooh,
you're going to get canceled for that. That's this mind
(02:12):
virus spreading and I know you've done it. I feel
like we've all done it at this point. Imagine how
sick a society has to be for people to find
fault with a guy trying to restore a blind person's
eyesight or bringing clear drinking water to people who need
it that he found a way to monetize this actually
only makes it more impressive because capitalism is good. It's
(02:34):
been good for millions of people, and we should have
more of it. That sounds so trite, I know, because
pointing out when things are good or bad, you know,
it doesn't sound interesting or complicated, but it's important. The
world is full of gray, but some things really are
black and white. Water wells for people who need drinking
water are good. The challenge with beating back the problem
(02:57):
with everything people is your instinct be to engage at
a deeper level than no, you're wrong, this is good.
A theme on this show is it's important to say
the words, especially when you have kids. Don't just assume
everyone will see the lunacy in criticizing getting clean water
to people who need it. Say what you think and
say it plainly. For the problem with everything people or
(03:20):
they win. Really that's what we're facing here. It's their
way of seeing the world will defeat our way and
we'll all have to cower to their insane expectations of
what somebody doing good deeds should look like, or what
they should act like, or how they should monetize or
(03:40):
not monetize, and so say the words or they win.
Coming up next and interview with faith More. Join us
after the break, Hi, and welcome back to the Carol
Marcoitz Show on the Clay Travis and Buck Sexton podcast
Network on iHeartRadio. Yesterday is faith More, author of the
(04:02):
new novel Christmas Carol. Faith is a freelance writer and editor,
and most importantly, a stay at home mom.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
She has been.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
Published in The Wall Street Journal, New York Daily News, Federalist,
and Daily Wire, among others. She is the author of
Saving Cinderella with Feminists Get Wrong about Disney Princesses and
How to Set it Right. Christmas Carol is her first novel.
Thanks so much for coming on the Show of Faith.
Speaker 3 (04:25):
Oh, thanks so much for having me. It's a pleasure
to be here.
Speaker 2 (04:27):
So when I first saw the title of your new book,
Christmas Carol, it's Carol is spelled with a K. I
have to say I definitely thought it was about me.
But that's probably not not true, is it.
Speaker 4 (04:39):
Well, it's not true because when you read the book,
you'll discover that Carol is not nearly as lovely as
you are. But I definitely did think of you when
I had to change the name from Carol with the
Sea to Carol with a K. It was originally Carol
with a See because it is a retelling of a
Christmas Carol, and so I had it Carol with a Sea, right.
(05:01):
We decided in the editing process that it needed to
have its own space, and so we gave her a
K name, and then I definitely thought.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
I love it obviously.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
So your book is a modern twist on the Dickens story.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
What inspired you to write it?
Speaker 3 (05:16):
Yeah, well it is.
Speaker 4 (05:17):
It's a modern retelling of a Christmas Carol, but the
Scrooge character is instead of an old miserly man, a
workaholic mom, and her miserliness is not about her her
time her money. It's about her time and how much
time she chooses to spend with her kids and her family.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
And it came from a couple of things.
Speaker 4 (05:38):
One is a Christmas tradition that my family has, which
is that every year, without fail, we sit down and
watch the Alistair sim version of a Christmas Carol. And
it's a sort of old black and white, fantastic movie
that everybody who cares about watching Christmas.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
Movies should watch.
Speaker 4 (05:55):
And it's one of those things where we watch it
every year as a family and we always noticed something new,
So it's part of my kind.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
It's just sort of like a story that's imprinted on
my heart, you know.
Speaker 4 (06:06):
And what happened was during the pandemic. I got the
idea for this during the pandemic. It was kind of
the tail end of the pandemic and everyone had been
home for you know, a year, year and a half
with their kids, and as you know, when you have
to parent and work at the same time, it's kind
of untenable. And everybody was talking about that, how how
(06:29):
am I supposed to you know, my kids, there's three
different zoom sessions I'm supposed to be on.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
How am I supposed to take care of.
Speaker 4 (06:34):
All of this and take care of my actual job
which I'm supposed to be at, And you know, that
was a big kind of theme at the time, was wow,
like I can't do this. I can't take care of
my kids and take care of my full time job
at the same time. But there was another thread that
was happening, and that thread was, Wow.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
I'm really enjoying my children.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
I'm getting to spend all of this time with my
kids that I don't usually spend because I'm at work
full time and they're at daycare or being picked up
from school by the nanny or there in after school.
Speaker 3 (07:05):
And isn't this wonderful? How do how do I tap
into that? You know?
Speaker 4 (07:11):
How do I go back to my regular life and
still spend all this time with my kids? And so
it was it was the Christmas of I think the
second kind of Christmas that happened in the pandemic, so
I think like twenty twenty one maybe, and people were.
Speaker 3 (07:26):
Kind of starting to go back to work.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
And the funny thing that happened, or maybe the sad
thing I don't know, is that all of those people
who are expressing that thing, they.
Speaker 3 (07:33):
Just went right back to work.
Speaker 4 (07:34):
You know.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
It was kind of like following that.
Speaker 4 (07:36):
Let's just the narrative is I go to work, my
kids go to daycare or school or you know, wherever
they're going. And I sort of started to connect that
story of Christmas Carol, which is just, as I say,
part of my own self and that experience and I thought,
what would it take for someone to step out of
the narrative, What experience would she need to go through
(07:59):
for her to step out of the narrative and kind
of choose a different life for herself. And that's kind
of where the story came from.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
So an interesting side note to listeners is that Faith
and I somewhat spent the pandemic together. We did. We
lived in the same Brooklyn neighborhood, and our sons went
to school together, and she was my rock of sanity
in an ocean of insanity.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
Oh same, So that was really good.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
But yeah, you're bringing up some really interesting things, which
is you know, so during that time, obviously you and I,
you know, very few other people fought for the schools
to reopen, fought for.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
Like life to go back to normal. But I say
this a lot.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
It was a really wonderful time for our family. I
loved having the kids at home. I loved us all
cozy on the couch every day and you know, dealing,
you know, doing their stuff and I'm doing my stuff,
and everything was like a slower pace. Obviously, I knew
it was bad for society. I knew it was not
great for the kids. I knew.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
I knew my kids would be okay.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I can get them like all the services or help
that they need, you know, when schools had failed.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
But I knew it would be bad for a lot
of other people.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
So your book is kind of a challenge to these
lies that we are fed about womanhood and marriage and femininity, right,
and so what are those lies?
Speaker 3 (09:13):
I think it's really a narrative that we're being sold.
Speaker 4 (09:17):
I think there's this concept now that kind of came
up through the entirety of feminism and has now met
us here, which is that in order to be a
valuable and productive member of society, a woman must do
this specific thing, which is, you know, graduate high school,
go to college, graduate college, get a high power job,
(09:40):
you know, become a CEO, a business person and whatever,
all these jobs that I never had and don't.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
Understand, and you know, go off and do these things.
Otherwise you're just.
Speaker 4 (09:53):
Going to be a mom or a wife or you know,
these kind of bad words, these awful things that you
might be. And I want to be very clear, I
think if you want to have a career, please do it.
Speaker 3 (10:04):
The thing that you need to know is that.
Speaker 4 (10:05):
You can't also be a full time parent. And I
think that's the problem, is that if in telling women
that motherhood and marriage and all of those kinds of
more quote unquote traditional pathways for women, and telling them
that those are somehow inferior, that they make you nothing
(10:26):
or they make you less valuable, then women feel that
they must do something which I think a lot of
women don't necessarily want to do, which is to sort
of go off and have these ambitious, more typically masculine careers.
And you know, it's a horrible lie to say to
women that the only way that you could be successful
or valuable is to be more like men.
Speaker 3 (10:47):
I mean, like, it's a total erasure of women. Right.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
There was a Babylon Bee story a few days ago
that was, like women just wishes there was a job
where she could like bake banana bread and like spend
time with her children, and like, you know, can't figure
out what that job might be.
Speaker 4 (11:03):
Right exactly, Yes, I have that job, although I will
say I always say that motherhood is not my job,
it's my vocation, because it.
Speaker 3 (11:10):
Really would be a terrible job. Like you don't you
don't get any promotions, there's just nobody, right, you know,
there's no feed there's no.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
Definitely no positive feedback.
Speaker 3 (11:19):
You know, exactly. So it's not my job, it's my vocation.
But I think that.
Speaker 4 (11:23):
It's it's something that a lot of people do kind
of aspire to without really realizing that it's something that
they could just do.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
And I also think, you know, there's definitely that line
where men are not sold this you can have it all,
you can have a full time job and be at
home with your kid all the time, because that's just
not a reality.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
They're kind of, you know, told that, like you have
to make choices.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
You know. One of the things I say is like
for all the kind of gender wars that we're in,
men don't get asked like when they have a baby, like, oh,
what are you going to do?
Speaker 3 (11:54):
Now?
Speaker 2 (11:54):
Are you going to quit your job and you know,
stay home? And like women do still get asked this
because we are different, because we want different things, because
we tend to make different choices. And the whole thing
about having it all, to me was always like this
lie that.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
Only women get told, right, it's not men. Men just
don't get that at all.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Kyle Smith one time had this great thing like why
would anybody want to have it all.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
This sounds horrible, you.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Know, well, it's also impossible.
Speaker 4 (12:23):
It's completely impossible, and I think, I mean, the thing
for men, I think is that if if you don't
have a family at home, if you don't have you know,
a beautiful home, if your kids aren't you know, happy
and comfortable and taken.
Speaker 3 (12:38):
Care of, what are you going out to work for anybody?
Speaker 4 (12:41):
I mean it it is. It's a sort of symbiotic relationship,
you know, it's and it's valuable.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Each one is valuable because of the other one.
Speaker 4 (12:51):
And so I think like we we completely kind of
unplug everyone from from purpose when we say that, you know,
women and men must be exactly the same and they
must go out and do the exact same things.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Right and want the same things, which don't I mean.
Speaker 4 (13:07):
Yeah, it's sort of it's ridiculous to assume that a
woman is going to grow a baby inside of her
body and give birth and then not have some sort
of different mechanism through which to think about the baby
than a man is going to have. You know, she's
obviously going to have a different experience of you know,
having grown the baby inside of her and given birth
(13:29):
and nursing or whatever. You know that all of that
does things to you biologically that mean that you're.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
Probably not necessarily like now, let's just throw the baby
over then take care and go off to my you know,
CEO job or whatever.
Speaker 5 (13:43):
We're going to take a quick break and be right
back on the Carol Marcowitch Show. So how do we
beat back these lies? Like, what is step one in
this very long process? I'm sure I.
Speaker 4 (13:56):
Think it really is about kind of stepping outside of
that narrative and giving ourselves permission to realize what we want.
Because I think for some people what they want is
maybe to not have a family and to go off
and you know, be the CEO, and that's that's fine.
But I think if you're if if that doesn't really
(14:17):
feel right to you, or you are feeling uncomfortable in that,
to know that it doesn't have to be that way,
I mean, I think, you know, in the book, that's
kind of what happens is that the Carol character kind
of gets to see what she's missing at home, and
she's kind of she gets to kind of step back
from the narrative of what she thinks she's supposed to
(14:38):
be doing and why and see kind of the way
in which her children are growing up without her, and
it's a time that will never come again. And I
think I think that's the piece of the narrative that
we're not telling people and that people need to understand,
is that in the entirety of your life, if God willing,
(14:58):
your life is long, you know, the percentage of that
lifetime in which your children are small and at home
and need you is so small. It's such a small
amount of your lifetime. Why not rearrange things so that
you can give it to your kids and then and
then come back. Your work will still be there, but
(15:19):
your kids won't, you know. And I think that's the
narrative that we need to unpack and like untangle for people,
is that it's not it's not a total kind of
amputation of your ambitions and desires. It's just it's just
a reframing for a moment, you know, take take a
step back, have the kids be with them in whatever
way you can or want to be, and then you know,
(15:42):
explore the career.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
Yeah, that's very interesting because I think that people think
that you know, your career is this ladder. I mean,
we use you know, career ladder all the time. But
I really don't think so. I think that for a
lot of people. For example, if you do you know,
you raise your kids, and then you go back to work,
you have a very different kind of goal orientated philosophy
about you at that point. Maybe, like you know, making
(16:06):
a lot of money is no longer the goal, maybe
like enjoying yourself at work is a goal.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
At that point, you just kind of reorient yourself.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
I mean, look, making money is great, obviously I'm all
for it, but you need some of it if you're
going to have Yes, yeah, yeah, your kids are very
very expensive. But the idea that once you step off
that ladder that you're off forever, that's crazy. I was
a stay at home mom, I was a work at
home mom. I was a work outside the home mom.
You know, there's a lot of different things that you
(16:35):
can do in your life, and I don't think that
making one choice means that you're in that choice forever.
I actually know lots of people who thought that they
wanted to be high powered career people and then they
had kids and realized, you know what you're saying, that
child is very short. I want to be there for it.
I know that I thought I wanted this, you know,
(16:56):
A B and C, but I actually don't want that
anymore exactly.
Speaker 4 (17:00):
And I think, you know, as you're saying, like you
were stay at home mom, you were work from home mom.
Speaker 3 (17:04):
You went out of the home, because that's what having
kids kind of sets you up to do. You know,
It's not like I mean, here I am right, I
have a toddler at home. I'm completely home full time.
Speaker 4 (17:14):
I have pretty much no child care, and here I
am I wrote a novel, so I you know, it's
not like I completely was like I'm sorry. You know,
all ambition, all creativity, all anything that is not my
children is now completely on some weird shelf that I
can't access. No, it's like, you know, my priority is
my kids. My priority is you know, what are they doing?
Speaker 3 (17:35):
What's the school pickup? Does it coincide with nap time?
Speaker 4 (17:38):
You know? Is there do we need to change a diaper?
That's that's where my brain is. But you know, I
get like this hour a day when my kid is snapping,
and I do this other thing, that magic allower hour
in which I drink a cup of tea and do
some writing and that. But that the point is that
time will grow, you know, as you're saying, like, now
he's in a little bit of school, so now I
have a little bit more time.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
You know, next year.
Speaker 4 (17:59):
He'll be in full you know, full time school because
you know it'll be time for pre k or whatever,
and on and on from there until they're gone. And
what if they're gone and you never were there?
Speaker 2 (18:08):
You know, all very good and serious things to think about.
So you have this hit book Christmas Carol. Do you
feel like you've made it?
Speaker 3 (18:16):
It's such a good question.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
I feel like I've gotten such a range of answers
to this. I love asking people this because you know,
I've had people who like our you know, one hundred.
Speaker 1 (18:27):
Millionaires say like, no, I don't feel like I've made it.
Speaker 3 (18:29):
So my answer is this.
Speaker 4 (18:31):
If I think about like my quote unquote career, like
as a writer and a novelist, then my answer would
be like, no, I'm only just getting started, Like this
is my first novel.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
This is what I want to do.
Speaker 4 (18:40):
Like I feel like I'm really kind of out there,
you know, trying to sell it and you know all
this stuff. But in my life, I have made it
because I have two beautiful children and that's really all
I need. I mean, there was a time when I
thought I couldn't have any children. There was a time
when I thought I wouldn't be able to have another.
You know, the birth of my first was difficult on
(19:00):
my body, and it meant that it took a long
time for me to figure out how I was going
to have another, and then I did, and so I
live with two miracles. You know, I have a husband
who I love and who loves me, and we've built
this family, so like, yeah, heck, yeah, I've made it.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
It really is all about perspective, and people understand that
question in a lot of different ways, so you know,
I love asking it. And the other question, no, it's
going to ask all of my guests, is what do
you think is our largest cultural or societal problem in America?
Speaker 1 (19:33):
And do you think it's solvable. That's one question.
Speaker 4 (19:37):
That's a big question, and I think it's kind of
hard to pick one, especially right now.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
It's hard to pick just one, but.
Speaker 4 (19:45):
I think I'm going to have to go with the
kind of devaluation of children and the kind of the
the sort of cultural narcissism that I think is probably
the cause of that. Like, so I'm thinking about, you know,
the way in which people, you know, abortion.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Is kind of just like fine, we celebrate that.
Speaker 4 (20:07):
It's so that women can go off and do what
they need to do, but not care about that child
or you know, as you very well know and have
written about so well, like the way that we kind
of threw them very much under the bus during during
COVID and kind of continue to do that. The way
that we, you know, are completely disregarding their sort of
(20:27):
mental health and needs during the trans all those sort
of trans stuff that's going on with kids right now.
And I think I think the issue is really around
our narcissism, Like as a culture, we want you know,
we we we want a career.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
So fine, have an abortion.
Speaker 4 (20:42):
We you know, we want to kind of be good
woke citizens and the cultural light gay. So our kid
says he wants to be a girl, like okay, great,
you know I think so, I think that's a big sort.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
Of thing anything goes.
Speaker 4 (20:55):
Yeah, the kind of overarching issue of like we it's
all about us somehow, and our kids are kind of
falling by the wayside, and can it be solved? Yeah,
but we all have to kind of again, we have
to have this. I keep calling it like a Scroogian shift,
because it's like, you know, in the book, like Scrooge.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
I mean, the whole thing about Scrooge is that he,
you know, he goes through this whole thing.
Speaker 4 (21:16):
And in Carol too, she goes to this whole thing
and nothing actually changes at the end. They're still the
same person, but their whole perspective has changed because they've
seen something new. And I think if we just took
a set back and we saw what we're doing, what
we're doing to our kids, what we're doing to ourselves,
then you know, we would probably start.
Speaker 3 (21:34):
Having families and taking more time with our.
Speaker 4 (21:36):
Kids and paying attention to our spouse and you know,
all of those things. And I think that would really
help us. Will we do it, I don't know, but
I think we could.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
Well.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
So, you know, about your character, Carol, she's able to
shed some of that narcissism, right, She's able to finally
look at her family and realize that that's what's important.
I guess how do we get, you know, non book
characters to do the same.
Speaker 3 (21:59):
I think it's about it's about stepping outside of the narrative.
Speaker 4 (22:04):
I think that's that's really what it what it is,
It's about kind of questioning yourself.
Speaker 3 (22:10):
So it's not what am I supposed to do? What
a society want me to do? What does you know?
What did my friends say? What does my college say?
Speaker 4 (22:18):
You know?
Speaker 3 (22:18):
What do my teachers say? It's kind of like what
do I know? Is right?
Speaker 4 (22:23):
And I think, you know, for Carol in the book,
she gets this kind of supernatural gift, which is that
she gets to.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
Look at and see what she is missing, and she has.
Speaker 4 (22:32):
Spoiler yeah, sorry, but she has this kind of revel
lady spoiler but like you know, Carol, I'm sorry, right.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
Right, and nothing you could do for this.
Speaker 3 (22:43):
It's like several hundred years.
Speaker 4 (22:44):
Old, yes, But I think, like you know, she she
has this realization where you know, she's kind of looking
at something that her kids are doing and she's like,
this will never happen again in this way, and I
am I am missing it? So I think, you know, what,
what are you missing? What am I missing? What are
we missing? Kind of step away from what we think
we're supposed to be doing.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
The supposed to be that is so big, I think
in so many different ways. And again I think it
is especially marketed towards women that's supposed to be supposed
to want, supposed to like, you know, supposed to become.
I think that if we could just somehow break that
supposed to And I don't know how you do it
because a lot of the times when people say to
me like, oh, society tells me, I'm like, did your
(23:26):
mom tell you that?
Speaker 1 (23:26):
Because that sounds like something.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
You know, I don't know, Like especially around food, I
feel like women are always like, oh, society tells us
to be like this, Like, well, my Russian mom did
not tell us, did not did not tell me to diet,
So you know, society right, right, right. So a lot
of times I do think it's like a major influence.
But I do think that you know, when you go
to college and you if you tell your professors I
just want to be a stay at home mom like
(23:50):
you will get some pushback.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
For sure.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
I remember this happening. Actually, So the supposed to be
is what I think we need to get over. And
I also think it's it's a tough one to get over.
Speaker 3 (24:00):
I totally agree, but I think it's hard.
Speaker 4 (24:03):
I guess we need to teach our kids also, we
need to teach them to not to sort of question
and to not go blindly into into things without you know,
And I mean that's something that I try to do
with my kids is kind of just like first of all,
to sort of tell them where where we as a
family stand to have values in your own.
Speaker 3 (24:23):
Family and you know, kind of how this is. You're
going to hear people say this. You're going to hear
people say that.
Speaker 4 (24:27):
But we this is what we think, you know, and
we believe in our family that whatever it is, you know,
and I think and also just to teach them to question, like, Okay,
if someone's telling you that something is one hundred percent
the way to do something or the way to be,
you know, something that's not a fact. You know, like
we have a fact, like you know, this war occurred
on this date.
Speaker 3 (24:46):
That's a fact. You don't need to question that.
Speaker 4 (24:47):
But like you know, if if if, what they're saying is,
you know, everyone must be this way or do this thing,
like you should automatically question those things.
Speaker 3 (24:55):
And we should teach our kids to do that.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
Yeah, yeah, I remember when we had to do that
during the exactly yea, and very few people did. But
you know, hopefully our children will I've really loved having
you on faith that. My last question that I ask
everybody is leave us with the best tip for.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
My listeners to improve their lives.
Speaker 4 (25:16):
Well, that's it. Step outside the narrative. Step outside of
the narrative and ask yourself, what do you really want?
And if I mean to go along with what we
have just been talking about, if you are a mother
and you have small kids at home and you're working
and that's not working for you, take a minute and
step outside the narrative. And if you don't know how
(25:37):
to do this, read this book. Read Christmas Carol, and
you know you don't have to be visited by.
Speaker 3 (25:42):
Three spirits on Christmas and helps, it really does help that.
I'm sorry I can't just send them to you. It's
a whole thing.
Speaker 4 (25:49):
But you read the book because I think what she sees,
it's not just what she's missing at home, but she
sees kind of the things that happened to her in
her life that have made her believe that this is
the only way that she can be And people can
do that. Take a step back and think about why
am I here? Is this where I want to be?
(26:10):
And there's no such thing as impossible. Really, there's just
kind of sacrifices and reprioritizing that you need to do. So,
if you're sitting there saying like I would love to
be home with my kids, or I would love do this,
but we can't afford it, or you know we can't,
you can, you.
Speaker 3 (26:25):
Just have to give up some other things. So I
think that my advice would be.
Speaker 4 (26:29):
Take a minute to step outside the narrative that you're
reading sold and see if it's the narrative that you
actually want.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
Thank you so much, she's faith more.
Speaker 2 (26:36):
Her book, Christmas Carol is out now wherever you buy
your books.
Speaker 3 (26:39):
Thanks so much for having me. This was great.
Speaker 2 (26:42):
Thanks so much for joining us on the Carol Markowitz Show.
Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.
Hi, and welcome back to the Carol Markowitz Show on iHeartRadio.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
There was a story this week about a YouTube personality
named mister Beast building one hundred water wells across Africa.
These wells will deliver clean drinking water to half.
Speaker 1 (00:19):
A million people who need it.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
And because it's twenty twenty three and because the Internet exists,
people are mad about it. They're mad because there are
already are charities that build wells in Africa, and mister
Beasts did it more successfully than they have. I mean,
how dare he cut off their grift and stop a
bunch of people getting paid on the way to building
that well. They're also mad because his success makes the
(00:43):
Kenyan government, for example, look bad. Which listen, they should
look bad. They do look bad. This internet personality, Taylor
Lorenz says, mister Beast is monetizing kindness because he does
these good deeds and then puts them on the Internet
and people watch it and that makes him rich. Meanwhile,
Taylor and much of the media monetizes all kinds of
(01:06):
horrible stuff. Taylor docks as people she doesn't like and
still thinks she's the good guy, and media in general,
I mean monetizes, creating strife between us, and so much more.
I'll take mister beast monetizing of good deeds any day.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Thanks.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
This isn't the first time mister Beast has hit some
controversy in this way. In fact, he was kind of
ready for it this time, saying I know I'm going
to get canceled, but I'm building these wells in Africa.
A few months ago he paid for surgery for a
number of blind people to be able to see again,
and this was called ablest, Like, how do you even
(01:42):
know that blind people want.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
To see again?
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Mister Beast's you terrible person? It's all absurd. Yes, it's
part of.
Speaker 1 (01:49):
A complex I call the problem.
Speaker 2 (01:51):
With everything complex. These people need to find the bad
in any situation. Obviously we can just ignore them, yes,
but the truth is that their way of looking at
the world is seeping into our lives too. Do you
ever hear someone say something, you know, rather innocuous and think, ooh,
you're going to get canceled for that. That's this mind
(02:12):
virus spreading and I know you've done it. I feel
like we've all done it at this point. Imagine how
sick a society has to be for people to find
fault with a guy trying to restore a blind person's
eyesight or bringing clear drinking water to people who need
it that he found a way to monetize this actually
only makes it more impressive because capitalism is good. It's
(02:34):
been good for millions of people, and we should have
more of it. That sounds so trite, I know, because
pointing out when things are good or bad, you know,
it doesn't sound interesting or complicated, but it's important. The
world is full of gray, but some things really are
black and white. Water wells for people who need drinking
water are good. The challenge with beating back the problem
(02:57):
with everything people is your instinct be to engage at
a deeper level than no, you're wrong, this is good.
A theme on this show is it's important to say
the words, especially when you have kids. Don't just assume
everyone will see the lunacy in criticizing getting clean water
to people who need it. Say what you think and
say it plainly. For the problem with everything people or
(03:20):
they win. Really that's what we're facing here. It's their
way of seeing the world will defeat our way and
we'll all have to cower to their insane expectations of
what somebody doing good deeds should look like, or what
they should act like, or how they should monetize or
(03:40):
not monetize, and so say the words or they win.
Coming up next and interview with faith More. Join us
after the break, Hi, and welcome back to the Carol
Marcoitz Show on the Clay Travis and Buck Sexton podcast
Network on iHeartRadio. Yesterday is faith More, author of the
(04:02):
new novel Christmas Carol. Faith is a freelance writer and editor,
and most importantly, a stay at home mom.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
She has been.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
Published in The Wall Street Journal, New York Daily News, Federalist,
and Daily Wire, among others. She is the author of
Saving Cinderella with Feminists Get Wrong about Disney Princesses and
How to Set it Right. Christmas Carol is her first novel.
Thanks so much for coming on the Show of Faith.
Speaker 3 (04:25):
Oh, thanks so much for having me. It's a pleasure
to be here.
Speaker 2 (04:27):
So when I first saw the title of your new book,
Christmas Carol, it's Carol is spelled with a K. I
have to say I definitely thought it was about me.
But that's probably not not true, is it.
Speaker 4 (04:39):
Well, it's not true because when you read the book,
you'll discover that Carol is not nearly as lovely as
you are. But I definitely did think of you when
I had to change the name from Carol with the
Sea to Carol with a K. It was originally Carol
with a See because it is a retelling of a
Christmas Carol, and so I had it Carol with a Sea, right.
(05:01):
We decided in the editing process that it needed to
have its own space, and so we gave her a
K name, and then I definitely thought.
Speaker 1 (05:09):
I love it obviously.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
So your book is a modern twist on the Dickens story.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
What inspired you to write it?
Speaker 3 (05:16):
Yeah, well it is.
Speaker 4 (05:17):
It's a modern retelling of a Christmas Carol, but the
Scrooge character is instead of an old miserly man, a
workaholic mom, and her miserliness is not about her her
time her money. It's about her time and how much
time she chooses to spend with her kids and her family.
Speaker 3 (05:35):
And it came from a couple of things.
Speaker 4 (05:38):
One is a Christmas tradition that my family has, which
is that every year, without fail, we sit down and
watch the Alistair sim version of a Christmas Carol. And
it's a sort of old black and white, fantastic movie
that everybody who cares about watching Christmas.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
Movies should watch.
Speaker 4 (05:55):
And it's one of those things where we watch it
every year as a family and we always noticed something new,
So it's part of my kind.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
It's just sort of like a story that's imprinted on
my heart, you know.
Speaker 4 (06:06):
And what happened was during the pandemic. I got the
idea for this during the pandemic. It was kind of
the tail end of the pandemic and everyone had been
home for you know, a year, year and a half
with their kids, and as you know, when you have
to parent and work at the same time, it's kind
of untenable. And everybody was talking about that, how how
(06:29):
am I supposed to you know, my kids, there's three
different zoom sessions I'm supposed to be on.
Speaker 3 (06:33):
How am I supposed to take care of.
Speaker 4 (06:34):
All of this and take care of my actual job
which I'm supposed to be at, And you know, that
was a big kind of theme at the time, was wow,
like I can't do this. I can't take care of
my kids and take care of my full time job
at the same time. But there was another thread that
was happening, and that thread was, Wow.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
I'm really enjoying my children.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
I'm getting to spend all of this time with my
kids that I don't usually spend because I'm at work
full time and they're at daycare or being picked up
from school by the nanny or there in after school.
Speaker 3 (07:05):
And isn't this wonderful? How do how do I tap
into that? You know?
Speaker 4 (07:11):
How do I go back to my regular life and
still spend all this time with my kids? And so
it was it was the Christmas of I think the
second kind of Christmas that happened in the pandemic, so
I think like twenty twenty one maybe, and people were.
Speaker 3 (07:26):
Kind of starting to go back to work.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
And the funny thing that happened, or maybe the sad
thing I don't know, is that all of those people
who are expressing that thing, they.
Speaker 3 (07:33):
Just went right back to work.
Speaker 4 (07:34):
You know.
Speaker 3 (07:34):
It was kind of like following that.
Speaker 4 (07:36):
Let's just the narrative is I go to work, my
kids go to daycare or school or you know, wherever
they're going. And I sort of started to connect that
story of Christmas Carol, which is just, as I say,
part of my own self and that experience and I thought,
what would it take for someone to step out of
the narrative, What experience would she need to go through
(07:59):
for her to step out of the narrative and kind
of choose a different life for herself. And that's kind
of where the story came from.
Speaker 2 (08:05):
So an interesting side note to listeners is that Faith
and I somewhat spent the pandemic together. We did. We
lived in the same Brooklyn neighborhood, and our sons went
to school together, and she was my rock of sanity
in an ocean of insanity.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
Oh same, So that was really good.
Speaker 2 (08:22):
But yeah, you're bringing up some really interesting things, which
is you know, so during that time, obviously you and I,
you know, very few other people fought for the schools
to reopen, fought for.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
Like life to go back to normal. But I say
this a lot.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
It was a really wonderful time for our family. I
loved having the kids at home. I loved us all
cozy on the couch every day and you know, dealing,
you know, doing their stuff and I'm doing my stuff,
and everything was like a slower pace. Obviously, I knew
it was bad for society. I knew it was not
great for the kids. I knew.
Speaker 1 (08:54):
I knew my kids would be okay.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
I can get them like all the services or help
that they need, you know, when schools had failed.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
But I knew it would be bad for a lot
of other people.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
So your book is kind of a challenge to these
lies that we are fed about womanhood and marriage and femininity, right,
and so what are those lies?
Speaker 3 (09:13):
I think it's really a narrative that we're being sold.
Speaker 4 (09:17):
I think there's this concept now that kind of came
up through the entirety of feminism and has now met
us here, which is that in order to be a
valuable and productive member of society, a woman must do
this specific thing, which is, you know, graduate high school,
go to college, graduate college, get a high power job,
(09:40):
you know, become a CEO, a business person and whatever,
all these jobs that I never had and don't.
Speaker 3 (09:46):
Understand, and you know, go off and do these things.
Otherwise you're just.
Speaker 4 (09:53):
Going to be a mom or a wife or you know,
these kind of bad words, these awful things that you
might be. And I want to be very clear, I
think if you want to have a career, please do it.
Speaker 3 (10:04):
The thing that you need to know is that.
Speaker 4 (10:05):
You can't also be a full time parent. And I
think that's the problem, is that if in telling women
that motherhood and marriage and all of those kinds of
more quote unquote traditional pathways for women, and telling them
that those are somehow inferior, that they make you nothing
(10:26):
or they make you less valuable, then women feel that
they must do something which I think a lot of
women don't necessarily want to do, which is to sort
of go off and have these ambitious, more typically masculine careers.
And you know, it's a horrible lie to say to
women that the only way that you could be successful
or valuable is to be more like men.
Speaker 3 (10:47):
I mean, like, it's a total erasure of women. Right.
Speaker 2 (10:50):
There was a Babylon Bee story a few days ago
that was, like women just wishes there was a job
where she could like bake banana bread and like spend
time with her children, and like, you know, can't figure
out what that job might be.
Speaker 4 (11:03):
Right exactly, Yes, I have that job, although I will
say I always say that motherhood is not my job,
it's my vocation, because it.
Speaker 3 (11:10):
Really would be a terrible job. Like you don't you
don't get any promotions, there's just nobody, right, you know,
there's no feed there's no.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
Definitely no positive feedback.
Speaker 3 (11:19):
You know, exactly. So it's not my job, it's my vocation.
But I think that.
Speaker 4 (11:23):
It's it's something that a lot of people do kind
of aspire to without really realizing that it's something that
they could just do.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
And I also think, you know, there's definitely that line
where men are not sold this you can have it all,
you can have a full time job and be at
home with your kid all the time, because that's just
not a reality.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
They're kind of, you know, told that, like you have
to make choices.
Speaker 2 (11:45):
You know. One of the things I say is like
for all the kind of gender wars that we're in,
men don't get asked like when they have a baby, like, oh,
what are you going to do?
Speaker 3 (11:54):
Now?
Speaker 2 (11:54):
Are you going to quit your job and you know,
stay home? And like women do still get asked this
because we are different, because we want different things, because
we tend to make different choices. And the whole thing
about having it all, to me was always like this
lie that.
Speaker 1 (12:09):
Only women get told, right, it's not men. Men just
don't get that at all.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Kyle Smith one time had this great thing like why
would anybody want to have it all.
Speaker 1 (12:20):
This sounds horrible, you.
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Know, well, it's also impossible.
Speaker 4 (12:23):
It's completely impossible, and I think, I mean, the thing
for men, I think is that if if you don't
have a family at home, if you don't have you know,
a beautiful home, if your kids aren't you know, happy
and comfortable and taken.
Speaker 3 (12:38):
Care of, what are you going out to work for anybody?
Speaker 4 (12:41):
I mean it it is. It's a sort of symbiotic relationship,
you know, it's and it's valuable.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Each one is valuable because of the other one.
Speaker 4 (12:51):
And so I think like we we completely kind of
unplug everyone from from purpose when we say that, you know,
women and men must be exactly the same and they
must go out and do the exact same things.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Right and want the same things, which don't I mean.
Speaker 4 (13:07):
Yeah, it's sort of it's ridiculous to assume that a
woman is going to grow a baby inside of her
body and give birth and then not have some sort
of different mechanism through which to think about the baby
than a man is going to have. You know, she's
obviously going to have a different experience of you know,
having grown the baby inside of her and given birth
(13:29):
and nursing or whatever. You know that all of that
does things to you biologically that mean that you're.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
Probably not necessarily like now, let's just throw the baby
over then take care and go off to my you know,
CEO job or whatever.
Speaker 5 (13:43):
We're going to take a quick break and be right
back on the Carol Marcowitch Show. So how do we
beat back these lies? Like, what is step one in
this very long process? I'm sure I.
Speaker 4 (13:56):
Think it really is about kind of stepping outside of
that narrative and giving ourselves permission to realize what we want.
Because I think for some people what they want is
maybe to not have a family and to go off
and you know, be the CEO, and that's that's fine.
But I think if you're if if that doesn't really
(14:17):
feel right to you, or you are feeling uncomfortable in that,
to know that it doesn't have to be that way,
I mean, I think, you know, in the book, that's
kind of what happens is that the Carol character kind
of gets to see what she's missing at home, and
she's kind of she gets to kind of step back
from the narrative of what she thinks she's supposed to
(14:38):
be doing and why and see kind of the way
in which her children are growing up without her, and
it's a time that will never come again. And I
think I think that's the piece of the narrative that
we're not telling people and that people need to understand,
is that in the entirety of your life, if God willing,
(14:58):
your life is long, you know, the percentage of that
lifetime in which your children are small and at home
and need you is so small. It's such a small
amount of your lifetime. Why not rearrange things so that
you can give it to your kids and then and
then come back. Your work will still be there, but
(15:19):
your kids won't, you know. And I think that's the
narrative that we need to unpack and like untangle for people,
is that it's not it's not a total kind of
amputation of your ambitions and desires. It's just it's just
a reframing for a moment, you know, take take a
step back, have the kids be with them in whatever
way you can or want to be, and then you know,
(15:42):
explore the career.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
Yeah, that's very interesting because I think that people think
that you know, your career is this ladder. I mean,
we use you know, career ladder all the time. But
I really don't think so. I think that for a
lot of people. For example, if you do you know,
you raise your kids, and then you go back to work,
you have a very different kind of goal orientated philosophy
about you at that point. Maybe, like you know, making
(16:06):
a lot of money is no longer the goal, maybe
like enjoying yourself at work is a goal.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
At that point, you just kind of reorient yourself.
Speaker 2 (16:13):
I mean, look, making money is great, obviously I'm all
for it, but you need some of it if you're
going to have Yes, yeah, yeah, your kids are very
very expensive. But the idea that once you step off
that ladder that you're off forever, that's crazy. I was
a stay at home mom, I was a work at
home mom. I was a work outside the home mom.
You know, there's a lot of different things that you
(16:35):
can do in your life, and I don't think that
making one choice means that you're in that choice forever.
I actually know lots of people who thought that they
wanted to be high powered career people and then they
had kids and realized, you know what you're saying, that
child is very short. I want to be there for it.
I know that I thought I wanted this, you know,
(16:56):
A B and C, but I actually don't want that
anymore exactly.
Speaker 4 (17:00):
And I think, you know, as you're saying, like you
were stay at home mom, you were work from home mom.
Speaker 3 (17:04):
You went out of the home, because that's what having
kids kind of sets you up to do. You know,
It's not like I mean, here I am right, I
have a toddler at home. I'm completely home full time.
Speaker 4 (17:14):
I have pretty much no child care, and here I
am I wrote a novel, so I you know, it's
not like I completely was like I'm sorry. You know,
all ambition, all creativity, all anything that is not my
children is now completely on some weird shelf that I
can't access. No, it's like, you know, my priority is
my kids. My priority is you know, what are they doing?
Speaker 3 (17:35):
What's the school pickup? Does it coincide with nap time?
Speaker 4 (17:38):
You know? Is there do we need to change a diaper?
That's that's where my brain is. But you know, I
get like this hour a day when my kid is snapping,
and I do this other thing, that magic allower hour
in which I drink a cup of tea and do
some writing and that. But that the point is that
time will grow, you know, as you're saying, like, now
he's in a little bit of school, so now I
have a little bit more time.
Speaker 3 (17:58):
You know, next year.
Speaker 4 (17:59):
He'll be in full you know, full time school because
you know it'll be time for pre k or whatever,
and on and on from there until they're gone. And
what if they're gone and you never were there?
Speaker 2 (18:08):
You know, all very good and serious things to think about.
So you have this hit book Christmas Carol. Do you
feel like you've made it?
Speaker 3 (18:16):
It's such a good question.
Speaker 2 (18:18):
I feel like I've gotten such a range of answers
to this. I love asking people this because you know,
I've had people who like our you know, one hundred.
Speaker 1 (18:27):
Millionaires say like, no, I don't feel like I've made it.
Speaker 3 (18:29):
So my answer is this.
Speaker 4 (18:31):
If I think about like my quote unquote career, like
as a writer and a novelist, then my answer would
be like, no, I'm only just getting started, Like this
is my first novel.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
This is what I want to do.
Speaker 4 (18:40):
Like I feel like I'm really kind of out there,
you know, trying to sell it and you know all
this stuff. But in my life, I have made it
because I have two beautiful children and that's really all
I need. I mean, there was a time when I
thought I couldn't have any children. There was a time
when I thought I wouldn't be able to have another.
You know, the birth of my first was difficult on
(19:00):
my body, and it meant that it took a long
time for me to figure out how I was going
to have another, and then I did, and so I
live with two miracles. You know, I have a husband
who I love and who loves me, and we've built
this family, so like, yeah, heck, yeah, I've made it.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
I love that.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
It really is all about perspective, and people understand that
question in a lot of different ways, so you know,
I love asking it. And the other question, no, it's
going to ask all of my guests, is what do
you think is our largest cultural or societal problem in America?
Speaker 1 (19:33):
And do you think it's solvable. That's one question.
Speaker 4 (19:37):
That's a big question, and I think it's kind of
hard to pick one, especially right now.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
It's hard to pick just one, but.
Speaker 4 (19:45):
I think I'm going to have to go with the
kind of devaluation of children and the kind of the
the sort of cultural narcissism that I think is probably
the cause of that. Like, so I'm thinking about, you know,
the way in which people, you know, abortion.
Speaker 3 (20:04):
Is kind of just like fine, we celebrate that.
Speaker 4 (20:07):
It's so that women can go off and do what
they need to do, but not care about that child
or you know, as you very well know and have
written about so well, like the way that we kind
of threw them very much under the bus during during
COVID and kind of continue to do that. The way
that we, you know, are completely disregarding their sort of
(20:27):
mental health and needs during the trans all those sort
of trans stuff that's going on with kids right now.
And I think I think the issue is really around
our narcissism, Like as a culture, we want you know,
we we we want a career.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
So fine, have an abortion.
Speaker 4 (20:42):
We you know, we want to kind of be good
woke citizens and the cultural light gay. So our kid
says he wants to be a girl, like okay, great,
you know I think so, I think that's a big sort.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
Of thing anything goes.
Speaker 4 (20:55):
Yeah, the kind of overarching issue of like we it's
all about us somehow, and our kids are kind of
falling by the wayside, and can it be solved? Yeah,
but we all have to kind of again, we have
to have this. I keep calling it like a Scroogian shift,
because it's like, you know, in the book, like Scrooge.
Speaker 3 (21:12):
I mean, the whole thing about Scrooge is that he,
you know, he goes through this whole thing.
Speaker 4 (21:16):
And in Carol too, she goes to this whole thing
and nothing actually changes at the end. They're still the
same person, but their whole perspective has changed because they've
seen something new. And I think if we just took
a set back and we saw what we're doing, what
we're doing to our kids, what we're doing to ourselves,
then you know, we would probably start.
Speaker 3 (21:34):
Having families and taking more time with our.
Speaker 4 (21:36):
Kids and paying attention to our spouse and you know,
all of those things. And I think that would really
help us. Will we do it, I don't know, but
I think we could.
Speaker 1 (21:45):
Well.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
So, you know, about your character, Carol, she's able to
shed some of that narcissism, right, She's able to finally
look at her family and realize that that's what's important.
I guess how do we get, you know, non book
characters to do the same.
Speaker 3 (21:59):
I think it's about it's about stepping outside of the narrative.
Speaker 4 (22:04):
I think that's that's really what it what it is,
It's about kind of questioning yourself.
Speaker 3 (22:10):
So it's not what am I supposed to do? What
a society want me to do? What does you know?
What did my friends say? What does my college say?
Speaker 4 (22:18):
You know?
Speaker 3 (22:18):
What do my teachers say? It's kind of like what
do I know? Is right?
Speaker 4 (22:23):
And I think, you know, for Carol in the book,
she gets this kind of supernatural gift, which is that
she gets to.
Speaker 3 (22:28):
Look at and see what she is missing, and she has.
Speaker 4 (22:32):
Spoiler yeah, sorry, but she has this kind of revel
lady spoiler but like you know, Carol, I'm sorry, right.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
Right, and nothing you could do for this.
Speaker 3 (22:43):
It's like several hundred years.
Speaker 4 (22:44):
Old, yes, But I think, like you know, she she
has this realization where you know, she's kind of looking
at something that her kids are doing and she's like,
this will never happen again in this way, and I
am I am missing it? So I think, you know, what,
what are you missing? What am I missing? What are
we missing? Kind of step away from what we think
we're supposed to be doing.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
The supposed to be that is so big, I think
in so many different ways. And again I think it
is especially marketed towards women that's supposed to be supposed
to want, supposed to like, you know, supposed to become.
I think that if we could just somehow break that
supposed to And I don't know how you do it
because a lot of the times when people say to
me like, oh, society tells me, I'm like, did your
(23:26):
mom tell you that?
Speaker 1 (23:26):
Because that sounds like something.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
You know, I don't know, Like especially around food, I
feel like women are always like, oh, society tells us
to be like this, Like, well, my Russian mom did
not tell us, did not did not tell me to diet,
So you know, society right, right, right. So a lot
of times I do think it's like a major influence.
But I do think that you know, when you go
to college and you if you tell your professors I
just want to be a stay at home mom like
(23:50):
you will get some pushback.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
For sure.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
I remember this happening. Actually, So the supposed to be
is what I think we need to get over. And
I also think it's it's a tough one to get over.
Speaker 3 (24:00):
I totally agree, but I think it's hard.
Speaker 4 (24:03):
I guess we need to teach our kids also, we
need to teach them to not to sort of question
and to not go blindly into into things without you know,
And I mean that's something that I try to do
with my kids is kind of just like first of all,
to sort of tell them where where we as a
family stand to have values in your own.
Speaker 3 (24:23):
Family and you know, kind of how this is. You're
going to hear people say this. You're going to hear
people say that.
Speaker 4 (24:27):
But we this is what we think, you know, and
we believe in our family that whatever it is, you know,
and I think and also just to teach them to question, like, Okay,
if someone's telling you that something is one hundred percent
the way to do something or the way to be,
you know, something that's not a fact. You know, like
we have a fact, like you know, this war occurred
on this date.
Speaker 3 (24:46):
That's a fact. You don't need to question that.
Speaker 4 (24:47):
But like you know, if if if, what they're saying is,
you know, everyone must be this way or do this thing,
like you should automatically question those things.
Speaker 3 (24:55):
And we should teach our kids to do that.
Speaker 2 (24:58):
Yeah, yeah, I remember when we had to do that
during the exactly yea, and very few people did. But
you know, hopefully our children will I've really loved having
you on faith that. My last question that I ask
everybody is leave us with the best tip for.
Speaker 1 (25:14):
My listeners to improve their lives.
Speaker 4 (25:16):
Well, that's it. Step outside the narrative. Step outside of
the narrative and ask yourself, what do you really want?
And if I mean to go along with what we
have just been talking about, if you are a mother
and you have small kids at home and you're working
and that's not working for you, take a minute and
step outside the narrative. And if you don't know how
(25:37):
to do this, read this book. Read Christmas Carol, and
you know you don't have to be visited by.
Speaker 3 (25:42):
Three spirits on Christmas and helps, it really does help that.
I'm sorry I can't just send them to you. It's
a whole thing.
Speaker 4 (25:49):
But you read the book because I think what she sees,
it's not just what she's missing at home, but she
sees kind of the things that happened to her in
her life that have made her believe that this is
the only way that she can be And people can
do that. Take a step back and think about why
am I here? Is this where I want to be?
(26:10):
And there's no such thing as impossible. Really, there's just
kind of sacrifices and reprioritizing that you need to do. So,
if you're sitting there saying like I would love to
be home with my kids, or I would love do this,
but we can't afford it, or you know we can't,
you can, you.
Speaker 3 (26:25):
Just have to give up some other things. So I
think that my advice would be.
Speaker 4 (26:29):
Take a minute to step outside the narrative that you're
reading sold and see if it's the narrative that you
actually want.
Speaker 1 (26:34):
Thank you so much, she's faith more.
Speaker 2 (26:36):
Her book, Christmas Carol is out now wherever you buy
your books.
Speaker 3 (26:39):
Thanks so much for having me. This was great.
Speaker 2 (26:42):
Thanks so much for joining us on the Carol Markowitz Show.
Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.
Host
Karol Markowicz
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