June 3, 2025 • 41 mins
In this episode, everyone's learning. Nick learns to do laundry, Winston masters a ruler, and Jess learns Ryan is her dream man. Lamorne has a distorted view of what a girls' night is, and Hannah doesn't use bleach.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:11):
Welcome back to another episode of The Mess Around with
Hannah and Lemoarne. Glad you could be here. Uh so,
uh Hannah. Yeah, last episode we were talking a little
(00:32):
bit about because this is probably a second episode in
a row. Well, this is the second episode in a
row where you're not rocking merch. What's going on?
Speaker 2 (00:40):
I know, I know. Well I'm waiting now for you.
It's your turn.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
I don't have any more.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
What are you talking about? You get here. This is
what I really think happens with your merch, okay, with
your mess Around merch, is that you give it to people.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
That's fair.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
I tell you what. I do it all the time.
Friends of my new visit I have friends because I've
tried all a ton around the world. And then people
come and visit me and then they're like, oh my god,
like you still do the podcast, Like yeah, I love
it so much. And then I'm like, here's you want
to swatter?
Speaker 1 (01:08):
And they're like, yes, well no, here's the thing you have,
like a surplus of it you have like you have
some at your house in Bulk. I don't have that
same I do.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
I do have a few pieces, Yeah I don't.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
I only get what you gave me. You literally gave
me a shirt, a hoodie, a hat.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
All right, you want more?
Speaker 1 (01:26):
Okay, I wear but the hat, I wore it out
so much that it's filthy, so I can't keep wearing it.
It's white.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
Your hat's white.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
The hat that I have have a white one. Whoa Hannah,
Slow down, Slow down. It's the same as the black
ones and the brown ones.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
I didn't even know that we made white hats, y'all. Okay, well,
you know what I'm gonna do. This is what I'm
gonna do for you. I'm going to text your assistant
and tell her to go to your wallet and get
your credit card, and you're gonna buy a bunch of
merch that you are then gonna wear on this show
so that we can show our fans how hard we
have worked at making some sigass merch for them, and
(02:10):
then they can see it on your Emmy Award winning
body period today.
Speaker 1 (02:18):
The episode is called Teachers Teachers.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
By the way, Kim Rosensak, who co created Dying for
Sex with Liz Merriweather, which is like a huge show
that everybody's freaking out about, and this is Kim's episode
right here, Yeah, trentle Donald directed, Who's like the king
of TV right now?
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Oh I love Trent. Trent is the man. We love TV.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
Do you know that like everything he touches God like
to gold DMV, got picked up, Ghost, got two more
seasons picked up like literally everything that he has touched
his now continued like keeps getting made. Yeah, Donald man.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Trenttle' donald is that dope. He's that dope, Jess. Okay,
this episode, Jess and Coach. They head to a teacher's conference,
where Coach has to face his fear of teaching health
class and Jess is doing everything she can to avoid
Ryan aka Ryan goes in you But damn that boy dreaming.
He's so dreaming. But anyway, Meanwhile, back at the Loft,
(03:14):
Guy's night takes a very very weird turn. Nick ends
up teaching Schmidt how to do laundry Winston. He helps
Winston figure out how to use a ruler, which is
so silly, and has to admit he has never learned
how to love.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
We'll be right back, and we're right back.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
We're right back, right back, right back, right back. Okay,
So Coach is letting the boys know that that he
let Jess know that he doesn't want to teach health, right,
that's not for him. He just wants to skip the conference.
He wants to hang out with the boys for guys night.
(04:01):
It's guys night, which is pretty much just celebrating one justly.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Which, by the way, is actually the right description of
how guys nights or girls' nights usually happen, which is
like your partner is going on a trip somewhere, right.
You never just go like you're in a relationship and
be like, it's guys night. It's like, well, yeah, it's
like I'm here so right, So it's perfect. They're very
(04:25):
excited and he wants to stay for a guys night,
but he's got a job. Also, like the disrespect for
these people on their jobs. You got a job, you
gotta go to the conference.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
Yeah, what do you think this is? First of all,
if I were a teacher, If I were a teacher,
I got to say I would hate to go to
well hate well, I would hate to go to these conferences.
I like things like that because there is the there
is the the allure that maybe there will be some
hooking up going on. But like what if you're like
not attracted to any of the staff. You know.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
I like how you're like, I'd be only interested to
go to my work conference if it was full of
attractive people who will be willing to sleep with me.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
You ain't got to sleep, you know, you got to
you ain't got to stick around.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
Well, if you knew that Lisa Bonett was gonna be there.
Speaker 1 (05:11):
I'd stick around.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
Now, Oh, Lisa, Lisa Bonet. I just would like to say,
this is like what she did for men of a
certain generation, Like the level of awakening and crushes and
like belief of like a real love that they could
have from her, is like what Johnny Depp did for
(05:35):
a certain like at a certain timeframe, for women of
a certain generation. Like yeah, obviously it's problem that problematic
now for Johnny, But I'm just saying, like Lisa Bonett,
I would talk to men about Lisaboney and the way
their eyes would light up and they'd be transported back
to being like thirteen years old or something, and they
were just like, she's the most beautiful woman that's ever lived.
I don't even know. I was in love with her for.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
So long, you know what's so crazy? I feel the
same with I was much younger obviously, but I still
feel the exact same way, and and to a certain
degree still do. She is fantastic. I remember, did I
ever tell you this? I think I may have said
it on this podcast before. H No, not the sandwich,
(06:17):
but I could. But that's a that's a big that's
a big one. It wasn't the sandwich. It was when
she was in the hair makeup trailer for our show
and I saw her and I was and she was
super nice and everybody's getting their hair makeup done and
I was like, oh hey, she was like, such a
pleasure to meet you. I was like, oh you as well.
(06:37):
And I don't know why I said this, but it
came out. I said it, and it's because I've had
a real crush on her daughter for a long time.
I said, Oh, I'm a huge I was like. I
was like, I was like, such a pleasure to meet you,
just a pleasurement. I was like, I love your daughter.
I think she's great. And she goes like this, thank you,
(06:57):
kind of like chill br that's right.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
She was like, Okay, you know what she can do.
She could probably sense in your energy when you walked
in the room. You also once carried a torch for her,
And it's a very strange thing to be like that.
You can you could love and idolize and worship the
mother and then just keep that torch going in the
flame going for the daughter as well.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
I mean, what a what a family. But you know
what's you know what's crazy is that I was just
being genuine in that moment, but also didn't think it through. Like,
just just let that sink it for a second. If
some dude walks up to me in the future, let's
say Lily becomes like an actor or a musician or
someone of a public notoriety, and I'm you know, and
(07:44):
I'm working with some younger dude and he's just like, man,
I love your daughter. I'm gonna look at him differently
for sure and be like, fuck you mean bro, that's right.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
You're not saying I'm in love with your daughter.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Yeah, Like I just you know, I I you know,
if I could take that back, I would, but I did.
But you know I did it.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
I said it, and it ended up working out because
you cross paths with both of them. Had a fine time.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Yeah, it was at the Gold party. Jay Z had
a gold jay Z and Beyonce had a gold party
a while ago after the Oscars, and I got invited
to it and I and I'm there and at one
point they're dancing with each other and as I I'm like,
they're kind of like in this walkway, so I'm walking
past trying to get around, but I ended up sliding
in between them and they start dancing like this on me.
(08:31):
I was like a bit of a sandwich. And I
panicked and just was like ha and like left. And
my boy at the time was looking at me.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Like, bro, what do you do? Put you to stick around?
Speaker 1 (08:46):
Stick around? Never again ever in the history of life.
Speaker 2 (08:52):
Full circle moment though, for like your young boy soul.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Oh yeah, I've lived a crazy life. Even though it's
little run ends like.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
That, it is weird when you think about it. My
very good friend Wendy was here this past week and
we were just talking about all the weird stories in life.
We've known each other forever, and she was like, what
do you think, like if the ten year old you
could see your life right now? And I was like,
would think your full face line like if you told
any any handful of weird stories would just be like,
(09:23):
why are you being so cruel? Yeah, yeah, fun, all right,
this episode, this episode, so yeah, Lisa Bonet is that
magic man. She's like in a different world. We were
just like traveler. Now we're just gonna be like they
went to the teacher's conference and they cried over some
sad songs. That was the episode. This is the situation.
(09:44):
Really just needs coach to go there because she needs
a buffer because it is not allowed. She's not allowed
to sit there and to date a fellow teacher. She's
the boss, she's the vice principal, and she's worked so
hard to get there. Now she has the ultimate temptation
of her dream man working there, and she's got to
keep it profession No. She does that by staying away
(10:07):
from him and running away from him and becomes close
right right.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
I love the fact that when she was breaking down
to him, like how great it's gonna be though, she's like,
it's gonna be so so great. We're gonna rage, well
except for like you know, we have a ten pm curfew,
you know what I mean. It's like, so we got
three hours of rage. It was like two and a
half because we get thirty minute clean up. We got
thirty minutes like.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
Teachers, we got to do the cleanup. We gotta do
the breakdown, we gotta do lights out, we got to
do quiet time.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
Yes, we'll be in bed by ten. Sounds like, but yeah, yeah, Jess,
you know or CEC's actually excited for Jess.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
Yeah. No, she's like, this is gonna be great, Like,
go you like you like this guy, It's gotta be fine.
And she's like, no, this is a living nightmare. She's like,
you know what, it's gonna be fine. I probably won't
even see him. It's gonna be okay. Cut to of course,
they have rooms next to each other in Jessice right,
this is going to be a nightmare. Then we are
back at the loft where the guys are trying to
(11:05):
go full bro out crazy with fart naps and meat
and beer and.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
Which is crazy jousting. Well, a lot of women don't
know that men do this. We put on pillows, blankets
and tape it around ourselves and we joust. We you know,
when I read episodes like this, I go, oh, I
know it's a joke and I know it's like a bit,
but a lot of women were on the show that
didn't know what men did in private.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
This is Kim's fantasy of what men do, by the way,
it was beautifully written by a woman, which is basically
all the ridiculous stereotypes of what men would do. Right, Yes,
then they're just looking at women, yes, right, Then how
seriously inept they are is revealed, and then that leads
(11:57):
to a spiral, and then how a lot of girls
usually have girls nights where it's just a bunch of
crying and working through big emotions and sharing.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
I don't buy that. I don't buy that one bit.
Every time every time girls have You know what I
think happens when girls have girls night? What orgies?
Speaker 2 (12:14):
That's the man is.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
I'm just like, they just called over so many people
and they just having an orgy party, and then they go,
They're gonna make it seem like they were crying and reading,
and it couldn't.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
I don't think that's ever happened in the history of
a girl's night.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
What crying and reading?
Speaker 2 (12:31):
No orgies?
Speaker 1 (12:33):
That's first of all, let's just stop right there. I
guarantee you we can find at least ten people in
the comments. I'd be like, yeah, I've done that.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
Never. I think it's never happened in human history. That
girls were like, we're doing a girls night. There's no
they're not doing that.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Hannah, I got news for you. It has happened.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
I'm a girl.
Speaker 1 (12:52):
I'm telling you, Hannah, you are a married girl.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
I was born married. I've had this mindset for life.
I've been a wife for life since the day i
was born.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Yes, yes, I'm telling you it has happened. Okay, folks
in the.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Commons, Okay, fine, ladies on your girls' nights? Has it
ever turned into an orgy? Because I will guarantee what
we just saw a new girl happened on the guys'
nights has happened. For sure. They thought they were going
to be all these macho things happening. They got distracted
by girls. Then they realized they didn't know how to
(13:26):
do some dumb shit. Then they googled it, and then
they tried to help each other figure it out, and
they started to spiral on some weird stuff, and then
they started to cry and drink too much.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
For sure, it's so crazy that Schmid doesn't know how
to do laundry. So we get it. Yeah, so we
get into this because except they were watching these girls
do yoga. Yes, and then when and then Schmid he
goes to say hi, but he spills red wine all
over Jess's comforter, and he's coming up with all these
reasons why it's bad. But Nick's like, just wash it,
and he knows he can't do laundry, which is so weird.
(13:55):
It's so that's we'll just say it, that's stupid.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
People when I went to college who did not know
how to do laundry, that's wild. They didn't know how
to do it. Their mom always or dad always did
it for them. They didn't know how to work the machine.
And then it was like, you know, like because then
kids can be annoying, and they were just like like,
I don't want you messing it up, but he just
like just and so they were never given that. And
then they went to university and a lot of guys
(14:21):
just really didn't do laundry.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Lily already knows how to do laundry. Lily will see
me doing laundry. Literally, she'll see me walking past her
in the laundryroom is down the hall from her room.
She'll see me walking and then she'll go and then
she'll be like sitting down. She'll get up and she'll
go in her closet and grab her dirty clothes hamper
and drag it out into the hallway. And then and
then she'll go, can I go first. I'm like, yeah, sure.
(14:45):
So she'll just start taking her clothes, putting in a laundry,
and I gotta do the rest. I gotta do the
soap and the buttons and stuff for her. But she
knows that she knows the process right. Literally.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
But that's a different generation like this, you know, were
to be like, okay, let's do it together. I'll teach you,
I'll show you, you know, like like up on a Greek island,
those Greek mamas are definitely not letting their little boys
do laundry, go hunt. I'll do anything you want. No,
go sit, have a coffee. It's very nice. It's very
(15:14):
nice to have a Greek mom.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
Oh my gosh, I love my mom. My mom is
Belligian basically the same thing. She does the same thing
for me when I come home, when I go to
visit her, she's always like, you don't do anything. You're fine, Like,
I gotta go, I'll do it. I'll do it.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Just eat more. Can I get more food than you?
Eat more food? Eat more? Food. Sit. Let me just
look at you. You're my creation. I would like to
look at you. I don't wan to see my creation
doing laundry sit. Yeah, I know those those are the
good moms. But then you don't know how to do laundry.
Not knowing how to use a ruler. That's that's a
real Winston situation.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
Well you think about it, it's like the wood, the
lines on the wood. Do you start at the wood?
Do you start the line? I've always I've always had the.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
School rulers were confusing because they did with the first tick.
You're right, like a tiny bit in Yeah, so.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
I'm like rulers, yeah, so like so then I have
to like go, I'm measuring my smile that I got
to inched.
Speaker 2 (16:07):
Over something measuring the smile.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
Okay, so oh, first of all, him trying to do
laundry is so funny. Him puting quarters in the self
dispenser like it's a laundromat. It's so funny. So anyway,
we get there, we're back at We're back at the
conference and coach or Jess is asking coach to be
her buffer. Now the speaker, Brenda Brown aka Lisa Boney,
(16:32):
she's asking coach to stand up because he's talking a lot,
and she asked him why he wants to be a teacher,
and wait, can.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
I just say the funniest part of that is that
he was talking too just to tell her to like
handle herself. But then and he's like, she's like, you
the talker, m h. And then he was like other
people were talking to the little kids.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
Response it is and it's a perfect response because they were.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
They weren't. Actually that's true. I love that they like
backed him up with the audio. They were just like
they had the other chat in the background. He got
called out.
Speaker 1 (17:06):
She tells him that he's not ready to be a teacher,
because he's not ready to be a teacher, and she
tells she tells the group, you know, in a very motivational,
very hippie way, that teaching is an awesome responsibility that
it really is, and she tells everyone to partner up.
Now here's the thing. The buffer is gone, coach is gone,
so it's just I'm not doing it.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
I also love this thing. It was last episode two
where he just goes like, yeah, I just don't care.
I'm just going to do it. Like he realizes I'm
an adult and if I don't feel comfortable, I'm just
not going to do it.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
Yeah, that should be everyone's motto in life. Nothing will
get done, sure because nobody actually feels like doing anything
other than getting a foot rub and eating grapes. Like
nobody wants them to do anything. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
I would love a foot rub and to eat some grapes.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
And that's why you got married. Go get that hands.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
Flash is what we're doing tonight, all right, Okay, So
then Jess is forced to be partners with Ryan, which
of course is her ultimate nightmare because it's like an
intimacy bonding connection workshop that Lisa Bonet is running.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
Yes, and then yeah, we.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Go back to the loft and this is where the
guys really are in a full spiral about laundry and rulers,
and Jake is like our Nick is like, okay, I'm
going to take this on the like simple fixes for
you guys. Turns out there, yes, yes, And then we
(18:40):
have the breakdown between Jess and Ryan. Yeah there for
every everything that he says is like her.
Speaker 3 (18:47):
Dream mm hmmm.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
He scrap books, he owns the arn. He catches Jess
as she falls during an exercise in which they break records,
making teamwork a thing.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
It's the sweetest moment when he catches her and the
blindfold whatever drops and then Zoe just does a beautiful
performance thing where she just like catches her breath a
little bit, and you're just she sunk.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
She sunk. Every time I catch a woman, I get
that same reaction, you know what I mean, Because women
be falling from like around.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
Me, falling, just fainting.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Yeah. I don't know if they're clumsy or narcoleptic. It's
one of the two.
Speaker 2 (19:27):
Hey, I show up with these narcolepsy conferences and women
are just falling for me.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
Man, it's crazy, it's crazy. But always catch him. Hey, ladies,
I will always catch you.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
Let us let us go to break and go to break.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
And we are black. Okay. So Jess is freaking out right,
She's in the hotel room's freaking out and uh call CEC.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
She's so smart, by the way, she wrote a letter
to herself in the future in case she does kind
of get pulled in by Ryan goes in you yeah,
and she knows. She goes into her friend's purse to
hide the letter. Yes, which is also because you could
have just like brought the letter with her, right, but
she needs Jesse Jesse, she needs Ceci, I think, to
(20:30):
like yell it at her, like she wants to hear
it with some grit, but Cec is like not on board,
so she just reads it like dry and straight and
annoyed because she's just like, this is ridiculous. If you
like this boy, like just figure this out. But then
you hear the hysterical letter that she's readen to herself,
(20:50):
very mean to herself.
Speaker 1 (20:52):
There's no one respects a queen that sleeps with you said.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
Well, pay my face, white man, have me now.
Speaker 1 (20:59):
Meanwhile, at the are uh coach you know he's drunk.
He says that he's just teaching health and you know,
the one of the teachers there is little offended by that,
just like it's a big deal. What's going to be
your plan? What's going to be your lesson plan? He says.
He says he's gonna lie and tell them that condoms
feel good. And I don't know, maybe tell him about
Magic Johnson, about Kobe Bryant.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
Crazy.
Speaker 1 (21:25):
I could damon made that up for sure, it was
not scripted. I can tell you two moments in this
episode maybe even three that we made up and I
know fact Damon.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
Made that okay, And the other one was I said
this last episode we recorded there was I feel like
you talking about rappers lying. I felt like you made
that up. I watched it. I was like, that's just
a little more. We got a pocket.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
Because I'm measuring the bottle, it says nine inches, like
they just rappers be lying. Oh no, oh no, yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway,
Nick is teaching Schmidt is a little bit sergeant.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
Of a teacher. By the way, did you notice this, like, no,
do it ten times?
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Yeah? He is? Which is? Which is?
Speaker 2 (22:20):
You know?
Speaker 1 (22:21):
I guess for Nick that's a it's a big moment
for him. He gets to like do something and be
in charge and like, actually, you know, help move push
the needle forward, and the needle in this case happens
to just be doing laundry. But you know he's teaching
Winston at the same time. You know, you start with
the first line on the ruler, which was the first
(22:41):
time I knew that as a human being. It was
a little morning. I've always been giving myself that extra centimeter.
And so he's like taking the the soap and he
pours it out, and then finally when Schmidt gets it right,
he pours out again. He's like, but I got it right.
He's like, now do it ten times. I know he's
so so far, I'm imagining what the floor looks like.
(23:03):
It's just covered in so it's.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
Just a mess. No one's cleaning that up. And the
other thing that they mentioned that made me laugh because
I will just like to say for my level of
laundry doing, I am I am at second this level.
Because when he talks about bleach and permanent press and
he's like, you don't need to worry about that, and
I'm like, yeah, I've never used bleach or I've never
done the permanent press cycle. I don't even know what.
Speaker 1 (23:27):
I never used bleach. No, so your whites just stay white? Yes,
oh you're always wearing black.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
True, I don't have the white at I gave that
one to you for a reason. I would never be
able to clean it.
Speaker 1 (23:42):
No, but bleaches bleaches.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
You know.
Speaker 1 (23:44):
I don't know if it's good for you, but I
know it definitely. I've been using bleach my whole life.
Effect I've accidentally bleached things that shouldn't be shouldn't have
been bleeding.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
That's my fear. My fear is to mess up with
bleach because there's no correcting that.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Yeah, scared, well, you're super rich. Could just go buy
a new, you know, set.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Of just that wasteful life to be like I bleached
it by your trash.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
Now, I don't give a more.
Speaker 2 (24:11):
That's not how I roll it all, no bleach because
I don't know how to do it, and I'm scared.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
Okay, and then that's so stupid.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
You know, you have to say this part. I can't
say it.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Which part when he comes he comes back with his sheets.
He comes back with the sheets. I can't. It's the
only way he can relax is self pleasure sheets of
the wash and he runs the cycle and shockingly, he
just does it smoothly. Wow, he did it by himself.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
He did it. He got of skilled, which is weird
because I guess he just gets everything like dry cleaned
and laundered or something, because he is the most like germaphobic,
like snappy dresser in the loft.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
But even his sheets, even as sheets.
Speaker 2 (25:02):
I guess some people, you know, like living in New York,
you have to just like walk your laundry down to
the laundry bat or you could take it to the
dry cleaners.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
Remember Thanksgiving episode? Yeah, didn't Schmid put a turkey?
Speaker 2 (25:16):
Was it a dryer?
Speaker 1 (25:17):
Yeah? He knew how to use the dryer just fine.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
There's a lot of weird things about Schmid not knowing
actually how to do laundry that it feels strange. I
feel like there's been a lot. I feel like the
fans are going to really help us out on this
because I feel like there's been quite a few episodes
where they talk about laundry and clothes in the dryer
and stuff like that, So I feel like fans help
us out. Does this match up with all of the
other Schmitty moments in this show? Because it feels weird? Yeah,
(25:44):
it feels weird. We are back at the conference. Ryan
tells Jess she's been avoiding it for weeks of school
and he was hoping to use this conference as like
a way to get to know each other, which, of
course she's like, oh my god. Then they all of
a sudden, there's like a scream because Coach is on
top of the lifeguard check drunk and about to like
(26:04):
backflip into the pool or something insane.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
He's about to do something.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
He is about to do something.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Yeah, and he's given this whole speech and then we
cut to Schmidt, so he feels like a new man.
Winston is trying to measure the width of his smile,
and at the very end Nick Nick is still trying
to get the group to go out and drink. He
wants to go to a bar crawl and he's like, okay, cool, Yeah,
you know we're all admitting okay, cool. You know I
can't never, I can't say February. You know, I can't
(26:34):
say the alphabet without singing. And I never knew how
to love. All right, let's go. And then the guys
are like, whoa what, that's heavy, dude, Let's talk about it.
And then he goes, what are we gonna do? Just
sit around all night, drink wine, talk about love, And
that's exactly what they do.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
I built one of those tents before.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
As a grown up or as a kid.
Speaker 2 (26:56):
As a grown up. Oh boy, I've built one of
those tents before. It was like a really romantic date,
built like a little tent and put like the movie
in there and snacks and it was like, yeah, it
was like being a little kid. It was really fun.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Yeah, that's nice. So you do it outside orde inside.
I was thinking about doing like a you know, doing
like a tent situation and going camping with Lily, but
in the backyard.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Yeah, do that. That's so fun. That's super sweet. Because
then after like three hours of it, when she's like, okay,
I like my bed. Now you're like, great, we go inside.
We're gonna go inside and in the morning where she
wants to go out there and play her tent, it's there.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
Yeah, clean all the little dirty bugs off of you,
and then we'll get to go.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
Oh boy.
Speaker 2 (27:40):
And they're singing, oh I don't know what.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
Love is, which is a great song, which is a
song that I definitely know all the words too. Uh.
Now Jess is now back at back at the ranch.
Jess is trying to save the day. I guess. She
goes up on the roof and she's talking to coach.
He's like, what is going on? You know, he's letting
(28:03):
the folks know, like, I'm drunk, I'm wasted, I'm not
to do a backflip right into the pool. And that's
when mister hero, mister goes in you he pops up,
he pops up on the roof as well, you know,
and he's, you know, he's like he's breaking it down
for coach, like, hey man, I get it, I get it.
Teaching it scary. I'm afraid. I'm afraid. This is my
(28:25):
first time. I'm scared too, you know. But he recognizes
how important that job is. And you know, Jess, you know,
she says that coach is like, She's like, dude, who's
better to tell kids about lamydia than you? Yeah? He's like, yeah,
that is mate, I sound like something I could be
good at. And then as he's saying that, he just
(28:45):
goes flying into the pool. He falls into the pool,
which could have ended poorly because I've seen these videos.
If people like fall, they're they're they're they're trying to
commit to jumping off the roof into a pool, and
then they halfway commit, and by halfway committing, they like
just kind of fall.
Speaker 2 (29:01):
It's so scary and so risky. So many people have
been seriously hurt.
Speaker 1 (29:05):
Yeah, people probably died doing this.
Speaker 2 (29:06):
Yeah, for sure. I was watching and I was like,
this feels very scary for real. That was, for sure
a very talented sutman who did that sunt dude, I
tried that at home, and.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
I love that. Ryan jumps in and he does it
like like with the most perfect.
Speaker 2 (29:22):
Dives, Olympic level diving, Like, please don't do something heroic,
Please don't do something heroic. And he does, and he
saves him like a baby and carries him out of
the water. Oh my god, Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (29:37):
Right there, that's definitely something Glenn Powell would do. So
now we're back at the Loft and the Poison. Now
they swish songs. Now they're singing Lano Richie. Hello, anyway, Nick,
(29:58):
you know what that video is crazy? I just somebody
posted a video. Somebody posted how how troublesome that video
actually was video? He's stalking a blind girl in school?
M hm, And Lionel Richie was in somebody's high school.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
Yeah, there's a lot of girl.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
Like just popping up behind them by her locker Like,
but what how First of all, you teach your age.
At least he had teacher teacher age face. You know,
I don't know how old he was back in the day,
but he had that mustache that said, I am somebody
in slacks.
Speaker 2 (30:32):
Slacks. It's all very strange. Lionel, you want to talk
about it.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
Come on the pod, Linel. His first name is my
middle name, and I don't know how I feel about that.
Speaker 2 (30:40):
Is your middle name of Lionel?
Speaker 1 (30:42):
Yes it is.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
It's a cute middle name than that that all men
want to hear. Middle name is cute.
Speaker 1 (30:51):
It's a very cute and average middle name.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
Lilight all right. Then leads on a whole spiral. Nick
questions where he can't find anyone. Winston tells him you
don't find diamonds underground, that Nick needs to value himself,
and then Whinston starts opening up.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
That's right. You know, he's worried about being a cop,
you know, like if he sees something really bad, you know,
and then he's it going to change him. You know.
There's a lot of stuff.
Speaker 2 (31:20):
That's emotion sharing. They're in the same gria.
Speaker 1 (31:23):
Guess what, yeah, man, And then just like women, they
turn it into an orgy.
Speaker 2 (31:28):
No, I can't wait to just read the level of
like ferocity. The women are going to come to defend
the truth.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
They're not going to women aren't going to just admit that.
That's how freaky they get at times. I'm not saying
they always do it.
Speaker 2 (31:48):
It's not a girls' night.
Speaker 1 (31:50):
It's called lying. It's saying, hey, we're having a girl's night,
but in fact you're bringing over the troops.
Speaker 2 (31:55):
No, this is you, like way back when you're a
teenager reading some like weird tumblr fan fiction of something,
and then you just being like this has got to
be true, and it's just stayed in like this weird
part of your brain that has made like that that
fiction fact and it's just not Anna.
Speaker 1 (32:11):
Well, we get off this call. I got news for you.
I got news for you. I'm not gonna let the
fans know about it, but it happens.
Speaker 2 (32:22):
Don't sell me any videos, please, I got all the
videos links website that shows you all the videos. No,
thank you. I don't need to see a male produced
bizarro fantasy to just the real women do not doing
their real life.
Speaker 1 (32:39):
Okay, I'm trying to tell you, but you don't want
to listen. You don't want to listen.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
Oh this moment, Ryan and Ess are drinking mini bar
bottles and they're bonding and it's so sweet and wonderful.
Speaker 4 (32:51):
Coaches asleep and so they have this perfect moment apologizes
and that Ryan tells like basically the nail on the coffin,
you know, of like just winning this woman's heart.
Speaker 2 (33:03):
Which is that he taught his sister, who was crippling dyslexia,
how to read.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
Oh god, she can't handle it.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
She can't handle it. It's like kryptonite. So she comes clean.
She says, I have a big, stupid crush on you,
and just as those words come out of her mouth, coach, coach.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
Coach, he needs he needs a puke bucket.
Speaker 2 (33:26):
He needs a puke bucket. He's crying. He's a mess,
and she says, I'll take care of it. And she
kicks Ryan out of the room and she's just she's
now crying and Coach is also crying.
Speaker 1 (33:39):
It's a mess. It's a big mess. It's a big mess.
Now the next day, you know, just ask Ryan if
he could just kind of strike that from the record,
you know, all that stuff she said the night before,
just just forget about it. And Ryan's he's curious. Well,
Ryan asked if she's curious to know how he actually
feels about her. And then he tell just what does speech?
(34:03):
What am at work? I can't stop focusing on you
because you my love.
Speaker 2 (34:08):
I love you.
Speaker 1 (34:10):
Thanksgiving with you.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
Then and then you're so good at accents. That was
a wild one.
Speaker 1 (34:17):
That was pretty that was pretty good. It's good that
it's pretty good.
Speaker 2 (34:21):
Jess's all right, it's all right.
Speaker 1 (34:24):
So then they just just, first of all problematic, just
just grabs him and kiss him. You don't do that.
You don't just put your mouth on somebody's mouths.
Speaker 2 (34:32):
He just said, like all he does is like think
about her and wants to be with her. I feel
like that was a pretty clear green light.
Speaker 1 (34:38):
Nope, nope, nope, it's twenty twenty five. You got to
you got to paperwork. You gotta get you gotta sign
that agreement.
Speaker 2 (34:45):
That's true.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
Yeah, straight, all the romance out of it. First consent, queen,
I love it.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
So yes, they have a little smooch.
Speaker 1 (34:55):
Mm hmmm what Coach interrupts, Yeah, of course, of course
he does, and uh yeah, and then they go off
into their own separate ways.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
They go the separate ways, he says. See. After Thanksgiving,
Jess and Coach returned to the loft, and she wonders
why it smells like Xangria. Coach lets the boys know
that Jess had that moment with Ryan. She goes into
her bedroom lays there is like what now because he
technically works for her, She's in a little spiral. She
(35:28):
goes to cover her head with the blanket that Schmidt
shrunk in the dryer.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
He's shrunk it in the dryer, so maybe he can't
use he can use the washing machine, maybe he can't.
Speaker 2 (35:39):
Use the dryer totally for turkeys.
Speaker 1 (35:41):
Yeah, we'll be right back, and we are back, very
very funny episode. There give us.
Speaker 2 (35:57):
We're only going to do one mess around question.
Speaker 1 (35:59):
Yeah, one mess around one.
Speaker 2 (36:01):
Because let me tell you what question two is, and
I'm not doing it. Question two is, with your respect
to friends, what do your guys and girls and nights
look like? We're not doing it. We've talked too much
about what girls and guys knights look like or what
they don't look like. We're putting that one on ice.
So we're just gonna do the first question, which is
is there something silly or very easy to do? I
guess for most people that you don't know how.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
To do something silly or very easy that you don't
know how to do. There's probably a lot of things
that I don't know how to do. Actually, you know,
I used to do my taxes, obviously, but myself when
I was first first working, like no, like I didn't
take it to like a place like an H and
R Block.
Speaker 2 (36:40):
Or something I did. I was like, the queen of
H and R Block was like, hello.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
Well, if we learned how to do our taxes in
high school, like they had a class. Yeah, so they
taught us how to do them. So I remember like
a couple of years doing my own taxes. And then
when I discovered like the power of like H and
R Block and stuff like that, I was like, let
me do it.
Speaker 2 (37:00):
By the way, H and R Block, you should, you
should sponsor us. We're doing a lot of we're letting
you know right now.
Speaker 1 (37:05):
Yeah you know. But now you know, I have a
friend who's an accountant, and then I you know, we
have business managers and stuff like that. That. But because
I know how to do it, I still monitor everything sure,
and you know, just kind of checks and balances and
making sure everything's all good.
Speaker 2 (37:20):
Okay, So what's something silly you don't know how to do.
Speaker 1 (37:24):
I don't know how to do. I don't know how
to love what.
Speaker 3 (37:28):
I love this.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
I'll get this, Angria. I'll tell you my weird one.
It's not that weird, I guess, but I wish I
knew how to sew.
Speaker 1 (37:38):
That's not weird or silly. That's I don't know how
to sew.
Speaker 2 (37:41):
But most people do know how to do a stitch
or thread the thing and do the way I can't
do it.
Speaker 1 (37:45):
I wouldn't say most people. I would say most older
people who had to do it. You don't have to
do it now, So it's like, I.
Speaker 2 (37:51):
Don't know, I feel like it's handy. There's so many
times where I wish I could have like sewn up,
like I've like ripped the part of a dress or
done something, and to go and to pay someone to
do it ever, seems so silly. If I just knew
how to use like like just a sewing machine, I
feel it could be great.
Speaker 1 (38:06):
I think I don't know. For me, I think it's
probably like coding.
Speaker 2 (38:11):
Yeah, but that's a looking silly or easy. That's not
like ruler level or like laundry level, Like you inventing
the new app to make you a billionaire is not.
Speaker 1 (38:21):
Oh how about this? How about this? I don't know
how to I don't know how to play chess. Okay,
I don't know. I don't know how to play poker,
and I don't know how to gamble, meaning like people
bet on games and these all these things with parlays
and spreads, and I don't know what any of that
stuff means me either. Yeah, so that's something that people
do often. I just don't know how to do it.
(38:42):
Chess is one of those things that I feel like
everybody knows how to do except for me. I never
I was never taught when I was a kid.
Speaker 2 (38:49):
Do you know how to sew.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
A little bit?
Speaker 2 (38:54):
Okay, So next time I see you, you can teach chess.
Play chess. Yeah, and you can help me sew a stitch.
Speaker 1 (39:03):
That that that that works.
Speaker 2 (39:05):
We'll be involved, and then we'll talk about learning to love.
Speaker 1 (39:08):
Lam We got to learn how to love y'all.
Speaker 2 (39:10):
Lamourne Lionel. I'll be there for you.
Speaker 1 (39:15):
Hell well, folks, thank you for tuning in. That was
a great show, a great episode. We've got so we've
got some We've got some action items here. One. Hannah
has to teach me how to play chess. I have
to teach charge so and you all have to tell
us all about your your girl's night.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Orgies, ladies, please educate this man.
Speaker 1 (39:37):
I'm saying. I know it doesn't happen majority of the time,
But I'm saying is that it does happen. You said
it's never happened.
Speaker 2 (39:43):
It's never happened in human history that women are like,
we finally are alone. We're gonna have a girl's night.
Let's invite in a bunch of men.
Speaker 1 (39:52):
Never, yep, it's called for that purpose. Never it's called back.
It's called bachelorette parties.
Speaker 2 (39:58):
That's not a girl's night. That's friend girls.
Speaker 1 (40:01):
That's definitely a girl's name girls night. That's definitely a
girl's night. Is the bachelorette party?
Speaker 2 (40:06):
No, please help me. The next loft meeting is going
to be crazy. Okay, follow us on ig at the
mess Around Pod. You can get some of that merch.
Maybe a white hat. We still have some at the
mess around pod dot com. Send all your thoughts and
agreements with me to theemess around Pod at gmail dot
com and you can let lamoar know how wrong he is.
Speaker 1 (40:30):
Well, I am correct. I love you guys, right, Please
please prove me right.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
That was the mess around In iHeartMedia Production.
Speaker 1 (40:39):
Our executive producer is Joel Monique, Our senior producer is
Abu Zafar Bei Wang provided engineering and editing services.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
Additional production from Daniel Goodman, Wendy Heisler, and Kyle Shevron.
Our theme song was written and composed by Ronald Jukebox Jackson,
Catch you Next time.
Speaker 3 (40:57):
Bye,
Welcome back to another episode of The Mess Around with
Hannah and Lemoarne. Glad you could be here. Uh so,
uh Hannah. Yeah, last episode we were talking a little
(00:32):
bit about because this is probably a second episode in
a row. Well, this is the second episode in a
row where you're not rocking merch. What's going on?
Speaker 2 (00:40):
I know, I know. Well I'm waiting now for you.
It's your turn.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
I don't have any more.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
What are you talking about? You get here. This is
what I really think happens with your merch, okay, with
your mess Around merch, is that you give it to people.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
That's fair.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
I tell you what. I do it all the time.
Friends of my new visit I have friends because I've
tried all a ton around the world. And then people
come and visit me and then they're like, oh my god,
like you still do the podcast, Like yeah, I love
it so much. And then I'm like, here's you want
to swatter?
Speaker 1 (01:08):
And they're like, yes, well no, here's the thing you have,
like a surplus of it you have like you have
some at your house in Bulk. I don't have that
same I do.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
I do have a few pieces, Yeah I don't.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
I only get what you gave me. You literally gave
me a shirt, a hoodie, a hat.
Speaker 2 (01:25):
All right, you want more?
Speaker 1 (01:26):
Okay, I wear but the hat, I wore it out
so much that it's filthy, so I can't keep wearing it.
It's white.
Speaker 2 (01:35):
Your hat's white.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
The hat that I have have a white one. Whoa Hannah,
Slow down, Slow down. It's the same as the black
ones and the brown ones.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
I didn't even know that we made white hats, y'all. Okay, well,
you know what I'm gonna do. This is what I'm
gonna do for you. I'm going to text your assistant
and tell her to go to your wallet and get
your credit card, and you're gonna buy a bunch of
merch that you are then gonna wear on this show
so that we can show our fans how hard we
have worked at making some sigass merch for them, and
(02:10):
then they can see it on your Emmy Award winning
body period today.
Speaker 1 (02:18):
The episode is called Teachers Teachers.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
By the way, Kim Rosensak, who co created Dying for
Sex with Liz Merriweather, which is like a huge show
that everybody's freaking out about, and this is Kim's episode
right here, Yeah, trentle Donald directed, Who's like the king
of TV right now?
Speaker 1 (02:37):
Oh I love Trent. Trent is the man. We love TV.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
Do you know that like everything he touches God like
to gold DMV, got picked up, Ghost, got two more
seasons picked up like literally everything that he has touched
his now continued like keeps getting made. Yeah, Donald man.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Trenttle' donald is that dope. He's that dope, Jess. Okay,
this episode, Jess and Coach. They head to a teacher's conference,
where Coach has to face his fear of teaching health
class and Jess is doing everything she can to avoid
Ryan aka Ryan goes in you But damn that boy dreaming.
He's so dreaming. But anyway, Meanwhile, back at the Loft,
(03:14):
Guy's night takes a very very weird turn. Nick ends
up teaching Schmidt how to do laundry Winston. He helps
Winston figure out how to use a ruler, which is
so silly, and has to admit he has never learned
how to love.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
We'll be right back, and we're right back.
Speaker 1 (03:40):
We're right back, right back, right back, right back. Okay,
So Coach is letting the boys know that that he
let Jess know that he doesn't want to teach health, right,
that's not for him. He just wants to skip the conference.
He wants to hang out with the boys for guys night.
(04:01):
It's guys night, which is pretty much just celebrating one justly.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Which, by the way, is actually the right description of
how guys nights or girls' nights usually happen, which is
like your partner is going on a trip somewhere, right.
You never just go like you're in a relationship and
be like, it's guys night. It's like, well, yeah, it's
like I'm here so right, So it's perfect. They're very
(04:25):
excited and he wants to stay for a guys night,
but he's got a job. Also, like the disrespect for
these people on their jobs. You got a job, you
gotta go to the conference.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
Yeah, what do you think this is? First of all,
if I were a teacher, If I were a teacher,
I got to say I would hate to go to
well hate well, I would hate to go to these conferences.
I like things like that because there is the there
is the the allure that maybe there will be some
hooking up going on. But like what if you're like
not attracted to any of the staff. You know.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
I like how you're like, I'd be only interested to
go to my work conference if it was full of
attractive people who will be willing to sleep with me.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
You ain't got to sleep, you know, you got to
you ain't got to stick around.
Speaker 2 (05:08):
Well, if you knew that Lisa Bonett was gonna be there.
Speaker 1 (05:11):
I'd stick around.
Speaker 2 (05:12):
Now, Oh, Lisa, Lisa Bonet. I just would like to say,
this is like what she did for men of a
certain generation, Like the level of awakening and crushes and
like belief of like a real love that they could
have from her, is like what Johnny Depp did for
(05:35):
a certain like at a certain timeframe, for women of
a certain generation. Like yeah, obviously it's problem that problematic
now for Johnny, But I'm just saying, like Lisa Bonett,
I would talk to men about Lisaboney and the way
their eyes would light up and they'd be transported back
to being like thirteen years old or something, and they
were just like, she's the most beautiful woman that's ever lived.
I don't even know. I was in love with her for.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
So long, you know what's so crazy? I feel the
same with I was much younger obviously, but I still
feel the exact same way, and and to a certain
degree still do. She is fantastic. I remember, did I
ever tell you this? I think I may have said
it on this podcast before. H No, not the sandwich,
(06:17):
but I could. But that's a that's a big that's
a big one. It wasn't the sandwich. It was when
she was in the hair makeup trailer for our show
and I saw her and I was and she was
super nice and everybody's getting their hair makeup done and
I was like, oh hey, she was like, such a
pleasure to meet you. I was like, oh you as well.
(06:37):
And I don't know why I said this, but it
came out. I said it, and it's because I've had
a real crush on her daughter for a long time.
I said, Oh, I'm a huge I was like. I
was like, I was like, such a pleasure to meet you,
just a pleasurement. I was like, I love your daughter.
I think she's great. And she goes like this, thank you,
(06:57):
kind of like chill br that's right.
Speaker 2 (07:02):
She was like, Okay, you know what she can do.
She could probably sense in your energy when you walked
in the room. You also once carried a torch for her,
And it's a very strange thing to be like that.
You can you could love and idolize and worship the
mother and then just keep that torch going in the
flame going for the daughter as well.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
I mean, what a what a family. But you know
what's you know what's crazy is that I was just
being genuine in that moment, but also didn't think it through. Like,
just just let that sink it for a second. If
some dude walks up to me in the future, let's
say Lily becomes like an actor or a musician or
someone of a public notoriety, and I'm you know, and
(07:44):
I'm working with some younger dude and he's just like, man,
I love your daughter. I'm gonna look at him differently
for sure and be like, fuck you mean bro, that's right.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
You're not saying I'm in love with your daughter.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Yeah, Like I just you know, I I you know,
if I could take that back, I would, but I did.
But you know I did it.
Speaker 2 (08:04):
I said it, and it ended up working out because
you cross paths with both of them. Had a fine time.
Speaker 1 (08:11):
Yeah, it was at the Gold party. Jay Z had
a gold jay Z and Beyonce had a gold party
a while ago after the Oscars, and I got invited
to it and I and I'm there and at one
point they're dancing with each other and as I I'm like,
they're kind of like in this walkway, so I'm walking
past trying to get around, but I ended up sliding
in between them and they start dancing like this on me.
(08:31):
I was like a bit of a sandwich. And I
panicked and just was like ha and like left. And
my boy at the time was looking at me.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Like, bro, what do you do? Put you to stick around?
Speaker 1 (08:46):
Stick around? Never again ever in the history of life.
Speaker 2 (08:52):
Full circle moment though, for like your young boy soul.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Oh yeah, I've lived a crazy life. Even though it's
little run ends like.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
That, it is weird when you think about it. My
very good friend Wendy was here this past week and
we were just talking about all the weird stories in life.
We've known each other forever, and she was like, what
do you think, like if the ten year old you
could see your life right now? And I was like,
would think your full face line like if you told
any any handful of weird stories would just be like,
(09:23):
why are you being so cruel? Yeah, yeah, fun, all right,
this episode, this episode, so yeah, Lisa Bonet is that
magic man. She's like in a different world. We were
just like traveler. Now we're just gonna be like they
went to the teacher's conference and they cried over some
sad songs. That was the episode. This is the situation.
(09:44):
Really just needs coach to go there because she needs
a buffer because it is not allowed. She's not allowed
to sit there and to date a fellow teacher. She's
the boss, she's the vice principal, and she's worked so
hard to get there. Now she has the ultimate temptation
of her dream man working there, and she's got to
keep it profession No. She does that by staying away
(10:07):
from him and running away from him and becomes close
right right.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
I love the fact that when she was breaking down
to him, like how great it's gonna be though, she's like,
it's gonna be so so great. We're gonna rage, well
except for like you know, we have a ten pm curfew,
you know what I mean. It's like, so we got
three hours of rage. It was like two and a
half because we get thirty minute clean up. We got
thirty minutes like.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
Teachers, we got to do the cleanup. We gotta do
the breakdown, we gotta do lights out, we got to
do quiet time.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
Yes, we'll be in bed by ten. Sounds like, but yeah, yeah, Jess,
you know or CEC's actually excited for Jess.
Speaker 2 (10:43):
Yeah. No, she's like, this is gonna be great, Like,
go you like you like this guy, It's gotta be fine.
And she's like, no, this is a living nightmare. She's like,
you know what, it's gonna be fine. I probably won't
even see him. It's gonna be okay. Cut to of course,
they have rooms next to each other in Jessice right,
this is going to be a nightmare. Then we are
back at the loft where the guys are trying to
(11:05):
go full bro out crazy with fart naps and meat
and beer and.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
Which is crazy jousting. Well, a lot of women don't
know that men do this. We put on pillows, blankets
and tape it around ourselves and we joust. We you know,
when I read episodes like this, I go, oh, I
know it's a joke and I know it's like a bit,
but a lot of women were on the show that
didn't know what men did in private.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
This is Kim's fantasy of what men do, by the way,
it was beautifully written by a woman, which is basically
all the ridiculous stereotypes of what men would do. Right, Yes,
then they're just looking at women, yes, right, Then how
seriously inept they are is revealed, and then that leads
(11:57):
to a spiral, and then how a lot of girls
usually have girls nights where it's just a bunch of
crying and working through big emotions and sharing.
Speaker 1 (12:06):
I don't buy that. I don't buy that one bit.
Every time every time girls have You know what I
think happens when girls have girls night? What orgies?
Speaker 2 (12:14):
That's the man is.
Speaker 1 (12:17):
I'm just like, they just called over so many people
and they just having an orgy party, and then they go,
They're gonna make it seem like they were crying and reading,
and it couldn't.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
I don't think that's ever happened in the history of
a girl's night.
Speaker 1 (12:30):
What crying and reading?
Speaker 2 (12:31):
No orgies?
Speaker 1 (12:33):
That's first of all, let's just stop right there. I
guarantee you we can find at least ten people in
the comments. I'd be like, yeah, I've done that.
Speaker 2 (12:38):
Never. I think it's never happened in human history. That
girls were like, we're doing a girls night. There's no
they're not doing that.
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Hannah, I got news for you. It has happened.
Speaker 2 (12:51):
I'm a girl.
Speaker 1 (12:52):
I'm telling you, Hannah, you are a married girl.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
I was born married. I've had this mindset for life.
I've been a wife for life since the day i
was born.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Yes, yes, I'm telling you it has happened. Okay, folks
in the.
Speaker 2 (13:05):
Commons, Okay, fine, ladies on your girls' nights? Has it
ever turned into an orgy? Because I will guarantee what
we just saw a new girl happened on the guys'
nights has happened. For sure. They thought they were going
to be all these macho things happening. They got distracted
by girls. Then they realized they didn't know how to
(13:26):
do some dumb shit. Then they googled it, and then
they tried to help each other figure it out, and
they started to spiral on some weird stuff, and then
they started to cry and drink too much.
Speaker 1 (13:33):
For sure, it's so crazy that Schmid doesn't know how
to do laundry. So we get it. Yeah, so we
get into this because except they were watching these girls
do yoga. Yes, and then when and then Schmid he
goes to say hi, but he spills red wine all
over Jess's comforter, and he's coming up with all these
reasons why it's bad. But Nick's like, just wash it,
and he knows he can't do laundry, which is so weird.
(13:55):
It's so that's we'll just say it, that's stupid.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
People when I went to college who did not know
how to do laundry, that's wild. They didn't know how
to do it. Their mom always or dad always did
it for them. They didn't know how to work the machine.
And then it was like, you know, like because then
kids can be annoying, and they were just like like,
I don't want you messing it up, but he just
like just and so they were never given that. And
then they went to university and a lot of guys
(14:21):
just really didn't do laundry.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Lily already knows how to do laundry. Lily will see
me doing laundry. Literally, she'll see me walking past her
in the laundryroom is down the hall from her room.
She'll see me walking and then she'll go and then
she'll be like sitting down. She'll get up and she'll
go in her closet and grab her dirty clothes hamper
and drag it out into the hallway. And then and
then she'll go, can I go first. I'm like, yeah, sure.
(14:45):
So she'll just start taking her clothes, putting in a laundry,
and I gotta do the rest. I gotta do the
soap and the buttons and stuff for her. But she
knows that she knows the process right. Literally.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
But that's a different generation like this, you know, were
to be like, okay, let's do it together. I'll teach you,
I'll show you, you know, like like up on a Greek island,
those Greek mamas are definitely not letting their little boys
do laundry, go hunt. I'll do anything you want. No,
go sit, have a coffee. It's very nice. It's very
(15:14):
nice to have a Greek mom.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
Oh my gosh, I love my mom. My mom is
Belligian basically the same thing. She does the same thing
for me when I come home, when I go to
visit her, she's always like, you don't do anything. You're fine, Like,
I gotta go, I'll do it. I'll do it.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Just eat more. Can I get more food than you?
Eat more food? Eat more? Food. Sit. Let me just
look at you. You're my creation. I would like to
look at you. I don't wan to see my creation
doing laundry sit. Yeah, I know those those are the
good moms. But then you don't know how to do laundry.
Not knowing how to use a ruler. That's that's a
real Winston situation.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
Well you think about it, it's like the wood, the
lines on the wood. Do you start at the wood?
Do you start the line? I've always I've always had the.
Speaker 2 (15:54):
School rulers were confusing because they did with the first tick.
You're right, like a tiny bit in Yeah, so.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
I'm like rulers, yeah, so like so then I have
to like go, I'm measuring my smile that I got
to inched.
Speaker 2 (16:07):
Over something measuring the smile.
Speaker 1 (16:11):
Okay, so oh, first of all, him trying to do
laundry is so funny. Him puting quarters in the self
dispenser like it's a laundromat. It's so funny. So anyway,
we get there, we're back at We're back at the
conference and coach or Jess is asking coach to be
her buffer. Now the speaker, Brenda Brown aka Lisa Boney,
(16:32):
she's asking coach to stand up because he's talking a lot,
and she asked him why he wants to be a teacher,
and wait, can.
Speaker 2 (16:38):
I just say the funniest part of that is that
he was talking too just to tell her to like
handle herself. But then and he's like, she's like, you
the talker, m h. And then he was like other
people were talking to the little kids.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
Response it is and it's a perfect response because they were.
Speaker 2 (16:56):
They weren't. Actually that's true. I love that they like
backed him up with the audio. They were just like
they had the other chat in the background. He got
called out.
Speaker 1 (17:06):
She tells him that he's not ready to be a teacher,
because he's not ready to be a teacher, and she
tells she tells the group, you know, in a very motivational,
very hippie way, that teaching is an awesome responsibility that
it really is, and she tells everyone to partner up.
Now here's the thing. The buffer is gone, coach is gone,
so it's just I'm not doing it.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
I also love this thing. It was last episode two
where he just goes like, yeah, I just don't care.
I'm just going to do it. Like he realizes I'm
an adult and if I don't feel comfortable, I'm just
not going to do it.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
Yeah, that should be everyone's motto in life. Nothing will
get done, sure because nobody actually feels like doing anything
other than getting a foot rub and eating grapes. Like
nobody wants them to do anything. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (17:51):
I would love a foot rub and to eat some grapes.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
And that's why you got married. Go get that hands.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
Flash is what we're doing tonight, all right, Okay, So
then Jess is forced to be partners with Ryan, which
of course is her ultimate nightmare because it's like an
intimacy bonding connection workshop that Lisa Bonet is running.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
Yes, and then yeah, we.
Speaker 2 (18:19):
Go back to the loft and this is where the
guys really are in a full spiral about laundry and rulers,
and Jake is like our Nick is like, okay, I'm
going to take this on the like simple fixes for
you guys. Turns out there, yes, yes, And then we
(18:40):
have the breakdown between Jess and Ryan. Yeah there for
every everything that he says is like her.
Speaker 3 (18:47):
Dream mm hmmm.
Speaker 1 (18:49):
He scrap books, he owns the arn. He catches Jess
as she falls during an exercise in which they break records,
making teamwork a thing.
Speaker 2 (19:01):
It's the sweetest moment when he catches her and the
blindfold whatever drops and then Zoe just does a beautiful
performance thing where she just like catches her breath a
little bit, and you're just she sunk.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
She sunk. Every time I catch a woman, I get
that same reaction, you know what I mean, Because women
be falling from like around.
Speaker 2 (19:21):
Me, falling, just fainting.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Yeah. I don't know if they're clumsy or narcoleptic. It's
one of the two.
Speaker 2 (19:27):
Hey, I show up with these narcolepsy conferences and women
are just falling for me.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
Man, it's crazy, it's crazy. But always catch him. Hey, ladies,
I will always catch you.
Speaker 2 (19:41):
Let us let us go to break and go to break.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
And we are black. Okay. So Jess is freaking out right,
She's in the hotel room's freaking out and uh call CEC.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
She's so smart, by the way, she wrote a letter
to herself in the future in case she does kind
of get pulled in by Ryan goes in you yeah,
and she knows. She goes into her friend's purse to
hide the letter. Yes, which is also because you could
have just like brought the letter with her, right, but
she needs Jesse Jesse, she needs Ceci, I think, to
(20:30):
like yell it at her, like she wants to hear
it with some grit, but Cec is like not on board,
so she just reads it like dry and straight and
annoyed because she's just like, this is ridiculous. If you
like this boy, like just figure this out. But then
you hear the hysterical letter that she's readen to herself,
(20:50):
very mean to herself.
Speaker 1 (20:52):
There's no one respects a queen that sleeps with you said.
Speaker 2 (20:54):
Well, pay my face, white man, have me now.
Speaker 1 (20:59):
Meanwhile, at the are uh coach you know he's drunk.
He says that he's just teaching health and you know,
the one of the teachers there is little offended by that,
just like it's a big deal. What's going to be
your plan? What's going to be your lesson plan? He says.
He says he's gonna lie and tell them that condoms
feel good. And I don't know, maybe tell him about
Magic Johnson, about Kobe Bryant.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
Crazy.
Speaker 1 (21:25):
I could damon made that up for sure, it was
not scripted. I can tell you two moments in this
episode maybe even three that we made up and I
know fact Damon.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
Made that okay, And the other one was I said
this last episode we recorded there was I feel like
you talking about rappers lying. I felt like you made
that up. I watched it. I was like, that's just
a little more. We got a pocket.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
Because I'm measuring the bottle, it says nine inches, like
they just rappers be lying. Oh no, oh no, yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway,
Nick is teaching Schmidt is a little bit sergeant.
Speaker 2 (22:15):
Of a teacher. By the way, did you notice this, like, no,
do it ten times?
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Yeah? He is? Which is? Which is?
Speaker 2 (22:20):
You know?
Speaker 1 (22:21):
I guess for Nick that's a it's a big moment
for him. He gets to like do something and be
in charge and like, actually, you know, help move push
the needle forward, and the needle in this case happens
to just be doing laundry. But you know he's teaching
Winston at the same time. You know, you start with
the first line on the ruler, which was the first
(22:41):
time I knew that as a human being. It was
a little morning. I've always been giving myself that extra centimeter.
And so he's like taking the the soap and he
pours it out, and then finally when Schmidt gets it right,
he pours out again. He's like, but I got it right.
He's like, now do it ten times. I know he's
so so far, I'm imagining what the floor looks like.
(23:03):
It's just covered in so it's.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
Just a mess. No one's cleaning that up. And the
other thing that they mentioned that made me laugh because
I will just like to say for my level of
laundry doing, I am I am at second this level.
Because when he talks about bleach and permanent press and
he's like, you don't need to worry about that, and
I'm like, yeah, I've never used bleach or I've never
done the permanent press cycle. I don't even know what.
Speaker 1 (23:27):
I never used bleach. No, so your whites just stay white? Yes,
oh you're always wearing black.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
True, I don't have the white at I gave that
one to you for a reason. I would never be
able to clean it.
Speaker 1 (23:42):
No, but bleaches bleaches.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
You know.
Speaker 1 (23:44):
I don't know if it's good for you, but I
know it definitely. I've been using bleach my whole life.
Effect I've accidentally bleached things that shouldn't be shouldn't have
been bleeding.
Speaker 2 (23:52):
That's my fear. My fear is to mess up with
bleach because there's no correcting that.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Yeah, scared, well, you're super rich. Could just go buy
a new, you know, set.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Of just that wasteful life to be like I bleached
it by your trash.
Speaker 1 (24:07):
Now, I don't give a more.
Speaker 2 (24:11):
That's not how I roll it all, no bleach because
I don't know how to do it, and I'm scared.
Speaker 1 (24:18):
Okay, and then that's so stupid.
Speaker 2 (24:22):
You know, you have to say this part. I can't
say it.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Which part when he comes he comes back with his sheets.
He comes back with the sheets. I can't. It's the
only way he can relax is self pleasure sheets of
the wash and he runs the cycle and shockingly, he
just does it smoothly. Wow, he did it by himself.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
He did it. He got of skilled, which is weird
because I guess he just gets everything like dry cleaned
and laundered or something, because he is the most like germaphobic,
like snappy dresser in the loft.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
But even his sheets, even as sheets.
Speaker 2 (25:02):
I guess some people, you know, like living in New York,
you have to just like walk your laundry down to
the laundry bat or you could take it to the
dry cleaners.
Speaker 1 (25:10):
Remember Thanksgiving episode? Yeah, didn't Schmid put a turkey?
Speaker 2 (25:16):
Was it a dryer?
Speaker 1 (25:17):
Yeah? He knew how to use the dryer just fine.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
There's a lot of weird things about Schmid not knowing
actually how to do laundry that it feels strange. I
feel like there's been a lot. I feel like the
fans are going to really help us out on this
because I feel like there's been quite a few episodes
where they talk about laundry and clothes in the dryer
and stuff like that, So I feel like fans help
us out. Does this match up with all of the
other Schmitty moments in this show? Because it feels weird? Yeah,
(25:44):
it feels weird. We are back at the conference. Ryan
tells Jess she's been avoiding it for weeks of school
and he was hoping to use this conference as like
a way to get to know each other, which, of
course she's like, oh my god. Then they all of
a sudden, there's like a scream because Coach is on
top of the lifeguard check drunk and about to like
(26:04):
backflip into the pool or something insane.
Speaker 1 (26:07):
He's about to do something.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
He is about to do something.
Speaker 1 (26:11):
Yeah, and he's given this whole speech and then we
cut to Schmidt, so he feels like a new man.
Winston is trying to measure the width of his smile,
and at the very end Nick Nick is still trying
to get the group to go out and drink. He
wants to go to a bar crawl and he's like, okay, cool, Yeah,
you know we're all admitting okay, cool. You know I
can't never, I can't say February. You know, I can't
(26:34):
say the alphabet without singing. And I never knew how
to love. All right, let's go. And then the guys
are like, whoa what, that's heavy, dude, Let's talk about it.
And then he goes, what are we gonna do? Just
sit around all night, drink wine, talk about love, And
that's exactly what they do.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
I built one of those tents before.
Speaker 1 (26:55):
As a grown up or as a kid.
Speaker 2 (26:56):
As a grown up. Oh boy, I've built one of
those tents before. It was like a really romantic date,
built like a little tent and put like the movie
in there and snacks and it was like, yeah, it
was like being a little kid. It was really fun.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Yeah, that's nice. So you do it outside orde inside.
I was thinking about doing like a you know, doing
like a tent situation and going camping with Lily, but
in the backyard.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Yeah, do that. That's so fun. That's super sweet. Because
then after like three hours of it, when she's like, okay,
I like my bed. Now you're like, great, we go inside.
We're gonna go inside and in the morning where she
wants to go out there and play her tent, it's there.
Speaker 1 (27:35):
Yeah, clean all the little dirty bugs off of you,
and then we'll get to go.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
Oh boy.
Speaker 2 (27:40):
And they're singing, oh I don't know what.
Speaker 1 (27:42):
Love is, which is a great song, which is a
song that I definitely know all the words too. Uh.
Now Jess is now back at back at the ranch.
Jess is trying to save the day. I guess. She
goes up on the roof and she's talking to coach.
He's like, what is going on? You know, he's letting
(28:03):
the folks know, like, I'm drunk, I'm wasted, I'm not
to do a backflip right into the pool. And that's
when mister hero, mister goes in you he pops up,
he pops up on the roof as well, you know,
and he's, you know, he's like he's breaking it down
for coach, like, hey man, I get it, I get it.
Teaching it scary. I'm afraid. I'm afraid. This is my
(28:25):
first time. I'm scared too, you know. But he recognizes
how important that job is. And you know, Jess, you know,
she says that coach is like, She's like, dude, who's
better to tell kids about lamydia than you? Yeah? He's like, yeah,
that is mate, I sound like something I could be
good at. And then as he's saying that, he just
(28:45):
goes flying into the pool. He falls into the pool,
which could have ended poorly because I've seen these videos.
If people like fall, they're they're they're they're trying to
commit to jumping off the roof into a pool, and
then they halfway commit, and by halfway committing, they like
just kind of fall.
Speaker 2 (29:01):
It's so scary and so risky. So many people have
been seriously hurt.
Speaker 1 (29:05):
Yeah, people probably died doing this.
Speaker 2 (29:06):
Yeah, for sure. I was watching and I was like,
this feels very scary for real. That was, for sure
a very talented sutman who did that sunt dude, I
tried that at home, and.
Speaker 1 (29:18):
I love that. Ryan jumps in and he does it
like like with the most perfect.
Speaker 2 (29:22):
Dives, Olympic level diving, Like, please don't do something heroic,
Please don't do something heroic. And he does, and he
saves him like a baby and carries him out of
the water. Oh my god, Oh my god.
Speaker 1 (29:37):
Right there, that's definitely something Glenn Powell would do. So
now we're back at the Loft and the Poison. Now
they swish songs. Now they're singing Lano Richie. Hello, anyway, Nick,
(29:58):
you know what that video is crazy? I just somebody
posted a video. Somebody posted how how troublesome that video
actually was video? He's stalking a blind girl in school?
M hm, And Lionel Richie was in somebody's high school.
Speaker 2 (30:13):
Yeah, there's a lot of girl.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
Like just popping up behind them by her locker Like,
but what how First of all, you teach your age.
At least he had teacher teacher age face. You know,
I don't know how old he was back in the day,
but he had that mustache that said, I am somebody
in slacks.
Speaker 2 (30:32):
Slacks. It's all very strange. Lionel, you want to talk
about it.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
Come on the pod, Linel. His first name is my
middle name, and I don't know how I feel about that.
Speaker 2 (30:40):
Is your middle name of Lionel?
Speaker 1 (30:42):
Yes it is.
Speaker 2 (30:43):
It's a cute middle name than that that all men
want to hear. Middle name is cute.
Speaker 1 (30:51):
It's a very cute and average middle name.
Speaker 2 (30:54):
Lilight all right. Then leads on a whole spiral. Nick
questions where he can't find anyone. Winston tells him you
don't find diamonds underground, that Nick needs to value himself,
and then Whinston starts opening up.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
That's right. You know, he's worried about being a cop,
you know, like if he sees something really bad, you know,
and then he's it going to change him. You know.
There's a lot of stuff.
Speaker 2 (31:20):
That's emotion sharing. They're in the same gria.
Speaker 1 (31:23):
Guess what, yeah, man, And then just like women, they
turn it into an orgy.
Speaker 2 (31:28):
No, I can't wait to just read the level of
like ferocity. The women are going to come to defend
the truth.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
They're not going to women aren't going to just admit that.
That's how freaky they get at times. I'm not saying
they always do it.
Speaker 2 (31:48):
It's not a girls' night.
Speaker 1 (31:50):
It's called lying. It's saying, hey, we're having a girl's night,
but in fact you're bringing over the troops.
Speaker 2 (31:55):
No, this is you, like way back when you're a
teenager reading some like weird tumblr fan fiction of something,
and then you just being like this has got to
be true, and it's just stayed in like this weird
part of your brain that has made like that that
fiction fact and it's just not Anna.
Speaker 1 (32:11):
Well, we get off this call. I got news for you.
I got news for you. I'm not gonna let the
fans know about it, but it happens.
Speaker 2 (32:22):
Don't sell me any videos, please, I got all the
videos links website that shows you all the videos. No,
thank you. I don't need to see a male produced
bizarro fantasy to just the real women do not doing
their real life.
Speaker 1 (32:39):
Okay, I'm trying to tell you, but you don't want
to listen. You don't want to listen.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
Oh this moment, Ryan and Ess are drinking mini bar
bottles and they're bonding and it's so sweet and wonderful.
Speaker 4 (32:51):
Coaches asleep and so they have this perfect moment apologizes
and that Ryan tells like basically the nail on the coffin,
you know, of like just winning this woman's heart.
Speaker 2 (33:03):
Which is that he taught his sister, who was crippling dyslexia,
how to read.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
Oh god, she can't handle it.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
She can't handle it. It's like kryptonite. So she comes clean.
She says, I have a big, stupid crush on you,
and just as those words come out of her mouth, coach, coach.
Speaker 1 (33:23):
Coach, he needs he needs a puke bucket.
Speaker 2 (33:26):
He needs a puke bucket. He's crying. He's a mess,
and she says, I'll take care of it. And she
kicks Ryan out of the room and she's just she's
now crying and Coach is also crying.
Speaker 1 (33:39):
It's a mess. It's a big mess. It's a big mess.
Now the next day, you know, just ask Ryan if
he could just kind of strike that from the record,
you know, all that stuff she said the night before,
just just forget about it. And Ryan's he's curious. Well,
Ryan asked if she's curious to know how he actually
feels about her. And then he tell just what does speech?
(34:03):
What am at work? I can't stop focusing on you
because you my love.
Speaker 2 (34:08):
I love you.
Speaker 1 (34:10):
Thanksgiving with you.
Speaker 2 (34:12):
Then and then you're so good at accents. That was
a wild one.
Speaker 1 (34:17):
That was pretty that was pretty good. It's good that
it's pretty good.
Speaker 2 (34:21):
Jess's all right, it's all right.
Speaker 1 (34:24):
So then they just just, first of all problematic, just
just grabs him and kiss him. You don't do that.
You don't just put your mouth on somebody's mouths.
Speaker 2 (34:32):
He just said, like all he does is like think
about her and wants to be with her. I feel
like that was a pretty clear green light.
Speaker 1 (34:38):
Nope, nope, nope, it's twenty twenty five. You got to
you got to paperwork. You gotta get you gotta sign
that agreement.
Speaker 2 (34:45):
That's true.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
Yeah, straight, all the romance out of it. First consent, queen,
I love it.
Speaker 2 (34:52):
So yes, they have a little smooch.
Speaker 1 (34:55):
Mm hmmm what Coach interrupts, Yeah, of course, of course
he does, and uh yeah, and then they go off
into their own separate ways.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
They go the separate ways, he says. See. After Thanksgiving,
Jess and Coach returned to the loft, and she wonders
why it smells like Xangria. Coach lets the boys know
that Jess had that moment with Ryan. She goes into
her bedroom lays there is like what now because he
technically works for her, She's in a little spiral. She
(35:28):
goes to cover her head with the blanket that Schmidt
shrunk in the dryer.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
He's shrunk it in the dryer, so maybe he can't
use he can use the washing machine, maybe he can't.
Speaker 2 (35:39):
Use the dryer totally for turkeys.
Speaker 1 (35:41):
Yeah, we'll be right back, and we are back, very
very funny episode. There give us.
Speaker 2 (35:57):
We're only going to do one mess around question.
Speaker 1 (35:59):
Yeah, one mess around one.
Speaker 2 (36:01):
Because let me tell you what question two is, and
I'm not doing it. Question two is, with your respect
to friends, what do your guys and girls and nights
look like? We're not doing it. We've talked too much
about what girls and guys knights look like or what
they don't look like. We're putting that one on ice.
So we're just gonna do the first question, which is
is there something silly or very easy to do? I
guess for most people that you don't know how.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
To do something silly or very easy that you don't
know how to do. There's probably a lot of things
that I don't know how to do. Actually, you know,
I used to do my taxes, obviously, but myself when
I was first first working, like no, like I didn't
take it to like a place like an H and
R Block.
Speaker 2 (36:40):
Or something I did. I was like, the queen of
H and R Block was like, hello.
Speaker 1 (36:44):
Well, if we learned how to do our taxes in
high school, like they had a class. Yeah, so they
taught us how to do them. So I remember like
a couple of years doing my own taxes. And then
when I discovered like the power of like H and
R Block and stuff like that, I was like, let
me do it.
Speaker 2 (37:00):
By the way, H and R Block, you should, you
should sponsor us. We're doing a lot of we're letting
you know right now.
Speaker 1 (37:05):
Yeah you know. But now you know, I have a
friend who's an accountant, and then I you know, we
have business managers and stuff like that. That. But because
I know how to do it, I still monitor everything sure,
and you know, just kind of checks and balances and
making sure everything's all good.
Speaker 2 (37:20):
Okay, So what's something silly you don't know how to do.
Speaker 1 (37:24):
I don't know how to do. I don't know how
to love what.
Speaker 3 (37:28):
I love this.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
I'll get this, Angria. I'll tell you my weird one.
It's not that weird, I guess, but I wish I
knew how to sew.
Speaker 1 (37:38):
That's not weird or silly. That's I don't know how
to sew.
Speaker 2 (37:41):
But most people do know how to do a stitch
or thread the thing and do the way I can't
do it.
Speaker 1 (37:45):
I wouldn't say most people. I would say most older
people who had to do it. You don't have to
do it now, So it's like, I.
Speaker 2 (37:51):
Don't know, I feel like it's handy. There's so many
times where I wish I could have like sewn up,
like I've like ripped the part of a dress or
done something, and to go and to pay someone to
do it ever, seems so silly. If I just knew
how to use like like just a sewing machine, I
feel it could be great.
Speaker 1 (38:06):
I think I don't know. For me, I think it's
probably like coding.
Speaker 2 (38:11):
Yeah, but that's a looking silly or easy. That's not
like ruler level or like laundry level, Like you inventing
the new app to make you a billionaire is not.
Speaker 1 (38:21):
Oh how about this? How about this? I don't know
how to I don't know how to play chess. Okay,
I don't know. I don't know how to play poker,
and I don't know how to gamble, meaning like people
bet on games and these all these things with parlays
and spreads, and I don't know what any of that
stuff means me either. Yeah, so that's something that people
do often. I just don't know how to do it.
(38:42):
Chess is one of those things that I feel like
everybody knows how to do except for me. I never
I was never taught when I was a kid.
Speaker 2 (38:49):
Do you know how to sew.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
A little bit?
Speaker 2 (38:54):
Okay, So next time I see you, you can teach chess.
Play chess. Yeah, and you can help me sew a stitch.
Speaker 1 (39:03):
That that that that works.
Speaker 2 (39:05):
We'll be involved, and then we'll talk about learning to love.
Speaker 1 (39:08):
Lam We got to learn how to love y'all.
Speaker 2 (39:10):
Lamourne Lionel. I'll be there for you.
Speaker 1 (39:15):
Hell well, folks, thank you for tuning in. That was
a great show, a great episode. We've got so we've
got some We've got some action items here. One. Hannah
has to teach me how to play chess. I have
to teach charge so and you all have to tell
us all about your your girl's night.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
Orgies, ladies, please educate this man.
Speaker 1 (39:37):
I'm saying. I know it doesn't happen majority of the time,
But I'm saying is that it does happen. You said
it's never happened.
Speaker 2 (39:43):
It's never happened in human history that women are like,
we finally are alone. We're gonna have a girl's night.
Let's invite in a bunch of men.
Speaker 1 (39:52):
Never, yep, it's called for that purpose. Never it's called back.
It's called bachelorette parties.
Speaker 2 (39:58):
That's not a girl's night. That's friend girls.
Speaker 1 (40:01):
That's definitely a girl's name girls night. That's definitely a
girl's night. Is the bachelorette party?
Speaker 2 (40:06):
No, please help me. The next loft meeting is going
to be crazy. Okay, follow us on ig at the
mess Around Pod. You can get some of that merch.
Maybe a white hat. We still have some at the
mess around pod dot com. Send all your thoughts and
agreements with me to theemess around Pod at gmail dot
com and you can let lamoar know how wrong he is.
Speaker 1 (40:30):
Well, I am correct. I love you guys, right, Please
please prove me right.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
That was the mess around In iHeartMedia Production.
Speaker 1 (40:39):
Our executive producer is Joel Monique, Our senior producer is
Abu Zafar Bei Wang provided engineering and editing services.
Speaker 2 (40:47):
Additional production from Daniel Goodman, Wendy Heisler, and Kyle Shevron.
Our theme song was written and composed by Ronald Jukebox Jackson,
Catch you Next time.
Speaker 3 (40:57):
Bye,
Hosts And Creators
Lamorne Morris
Hannah Simone
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