#468 Where Did Fashion Bloggers Go? Nikki's Football Question & Sales Associates

Who doesn’t love a good sleep-in day? But Nikki’s struggling with some serious guilt about it—how can she get over those feelings? While chilling at the park, Nikki watched a dad and his kid fly a kite and wondered why that’s the last thing she’d ever want to do. Brian found out about EJ and Julie’s river house and why it’s just not Nikki’s vibe. During her run, Nikki had a major lightbulb moment about an upcoming big interview. Brian's dying to know the details, but he’ll have to stay curious for now. Nikki has a question about Football that no one seems to know the answer to. She is on a new app to learn million dollar words. They chatted about Adam Sandler’s Love You and totally vibed with his comedy style. Nikki’s also wondering where all the fashion bloggers went and why it’s so hard to find cute, everyday wear. While returning some stuff and feeling a bit rough around the edges, Nikki tried to win over the sales associate. She and Brian agreed that shopping can be a struggle and finding the right balance with salespeople is a total balancing act.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
The Knickkkei Gliser podcast O n Glasers Hello, Oh sorry, hello.
I don't know why I did that. I was like
expecting you to do it, and then I was like, wait,
you should be talking.

Speaker 2 (00:21):
It's like my brain just did it. It's it's labor day.

Speaker 1 (00:24):
Still, It's fine. Can it still be labor day? Does
anyone else feel like it wasn't long enough? Yes? It
was so one more day. It was so nice. I
slept in from set, I got back from a gig
on Sunday, went to bed at eleven, woke up yesterday
twelve thirty five. Wow, it was awesome. I woke up

(00:47):
around nine, you know, and just was like, no, not
doing it. Chris was taking care of the dog. He
was already up. I knew that was happening, and yeah,
it was just it was delightful. Did I feel guilty
and feel like shit the rest of the day, You
know it, you know it. But I still loved it
so much. I'm just I'm like in my sleep era

(01:08):
right now. I feel like there's a lot of work
coming up, and I'm just hibernating, trying to like reserve
get all that, even though that's not how sleep works.
And we all know that just trying to rest anytime
I can, saying no to literally everything, everything that's coming
in besides things that you know I have to do

(01:28):
and have committed to. That's a new thing. I'm loving that.
Just knocked a post thing off the wall. Saying no
to that. It says, put me back up, not gone.
I actually I want to because it's like my OCD
like and it's velcro. It should go back up. Sorry
you guys, if you're not watching the YouTube version, I
just knocked am.

Speaker 3 (01:45):
Off the wall, gone off the chain. Now she's off
the rails.

Speaker 1 (01:48):
I mean she's I'm so off the rails, guys. Enjoy
your weekend.

Speaker 3 (01:53):
I waver between enjoying holidays and despising holidays, depending on
whether I'm trying to be product or not. I remember like,
oh yeah, if I'm trying to be productive and it's
like I need to go to the post office or
I need to go to the bank, or I need
people to like respond to an email, and then I
look and it's like Memorial Day. Yeah, I'm like, why

(02:14):
the fuck do we have this day off? Even though
obviously there's good reasons for.

Speaker 2 (02:17):
It to vision you want to get shipped done.

Speaker 3 (02:19):
Yeah, but then there are times when it's like I
just want to relax, I just need a break. And
then I look at it and just like a random Wednesday,
and I'm like, why do we have this to work today?
So it really is they should have arranged the holidays
around when I'm trying to be productive, is my point.

Speaker 1 (02:33):
Yeah, I I forget that things are closed in people,
but things aren't closed, is the thing. Everyone's working, everything's open,
everything's disgruntled working on Labor Day as.

Speaker 3 (02:43):
They shouldst society has gone out of control.

Speaker 1 (02:47):
It's it's out of control.

Speaker 3 (02:50):
Working from home. We thought that because we're working from home,
we're gonna have to work less. No, that just means
you're working twenty four to seven.

Speaker 2 (02:58):
We all know that this is killing us.

Speaker 1 (03:00):
And like the greed and the overachieving and trying to
in the hustle culture and proving everyone that we're doing
things the grind set, just proving that, just proving to
everyone that we're working so hard.

Speaker 2 (03:16):
Yeah, we all know that it's like not.

Speaker 3 (03:17):
Good for you to get your ice bath today, exactly,
you got your ice bath five am.

Speaker 1 (03:22):
Even relaxing, that's something self care and that is hard
like an ice bath is hell, like self care is
now turning into work too. Now yeah, to suffer and
shiver in a shower.

Speaker 3 (03:33):
My shock demat, Yeah you are.

Speaker 1 (03:36):
You are trying to lay for your overall well being.
You lay on spikes.

Speaker 3 (03:41):
Yes, I lay on spikes for thirty minutes before bed
each day, each night.

Speaker 1 (03:45):
What happened until twelve thirty five on a Sunday?

Speaker 3 (03:48):
Even the nineties anymore? Nikki? This isn't the stoner era?
You a slacker?

Speaker 1 (03:55):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (03:56):
Man, it used to be cool.

Speaker 1 (03:57):
Yeah, I know.

Speaker 4 (03:58):
I have a new rule. I think it's like it
came with a age. Okay, okay.

Speaker 1 (04:02):
Now rule is.

Speaker 4 (04:05):
I don't like doing anything strenuous a day before work starts,
So like Sundays for me, I will not travel. I
will not do anything ambitious like a big hike or
sight seeing or anything crazy like that, like dinner, party
or anything like that. Sundays are just for doing nothing,
literal nothing, getting ready for my life.

Speaker 1 (04:26):
When the girl's chat, I even went to the park
to I always go to the park with my dog.
It's very easy. It makes me feel like I've done something.
I throw the ball three times. She's worn out and
then we leave and it's near my house. It's so easy,
but it makes you feel.

Speaker 2 (04:37):
So much like I've done something.

Speaker 1 (04:38):
It literally takes fifteen minutes between when I leave the
door and I enter back into my apartment.

Speaker 2 (04:42):
It's so easy.

Speaker 1 (04:43):
But I was at the park and I saw a
guy like flying a kite with his son, and it
infuriated me because I was like, I can't prob why
does anyone want to do that? Even though I loved
flying kites as a kid and we would go up
to Depara Park all the time with my dad and
fly kites. And I was so grateful that he wanted
to do that and was like so game for it,
and but I was just like I would never want
to do that now. And then it made me mad

(05:04):
at myself, like why can't I be someone who wants
to show a child the world? And I had a
dream I was pregnant this weekend, and I kind of
like liked being pregnant because I just was like ha haa
everyone that thought I couldn't do it, like it was
just a me showing off that I could do I honestly.

Speaker 3 (05:19):
Number three three type, what.

Speaker 1 (05:22):
Do you mean a pregnant just to be like yeah,
I can do it too, or just like you know,
like and because I know it is such a physically
exhausting and difficult thing to even achieve first of all,
and there's like some kind of like superiority that women
who can conceive naturally feel that is is wrong and

(05:42):
I'm not perpetuating that, but it's in our culture that
feel like shame if you can't conceive.

Speaker 2 (05:48):
And so there was part of that.

Speaker 1 (05:49):
Of like I probably could conceive at forty and a
half years old, and like so I think in my brain,
but then I don't. I didn't want to do anything.
I just wanted to be pregnant and like show everyone.
But that was that was it, and I got to
do it in my dream, and that was enough for me.
And I don't think it's some dying like this like
secret wish of mine to be a mother. I don't
think that was what was going on. It was just
like who knows what it's about dreams?

Speaker 3 (06:10):
Who gets a shit?

Speaker 1 (06:11):
I'm so sorry I told you about a dream.

Speaker 2 (06:12):
I'm so so sorry.

Speaker 1 (06:13):
I am so I like broke my own rule. It
was supposed to be just an aside.

Speaker 3 (06:18):
I had a dream last night that I was pregnant
and John Stamos was there, and there was an alien
telling me.

Speaker 1 (06:25):
Yeah, well that no, that would never be one of
my dreams because they don't look like cohesive things that
are happening. It's just glimmers of something. They would never
Whenever people count their dreams to me, I go, that
sounds too narrative to me to be a dream. But yeah,
I mean this weekend was I flew to North Dakota
on Saturday, which is so great because I had Friday

(06:46):
to get home in Saint Louis and I never am
home in Saint Louis on Friday, did nothing on Friday
night under the guise of like, I have to travel
tomorrow early, even though I could have done something, but
I didn't felt guilty about that because my family was
like hanging out at my parents' cabin and I could
have driven down. But in Eureka, Missouri, it's like probably

(07:07):
forty minute drive out.

Speaker 3 (07:09):
But it's like parents.

Speaker 1 (07:11):
Yeah, Wow, how many.

Speaker 2 (07:12):
Times have I've been there in fifteen years?

Speaker 3 (07:14):
Twice?

Speaker 1 (07:17):
I mean welcome home, Nikki gle Oh, yeah, so three times.
I guess I filmed an episode there too.

Speaker 3 (07:22):
They've had a cabin for fifteen years.

Speaker 1 (07:24):
Yeah, probably longer. It's I'm floted. They've rebuilt it. No,
it's it is really nice, but I I have like
an aversion to it because I just feel like I'm
going to be trapped down there.

Speaker 3 (07:36):
That's the problem.

Speaker 1 (07:37):
I have to like cook things, even though I've never
been forced to cook. I've never been forced to sit
around to fire. I don't know what my version is
to it. I just need I don't know. I got
to really explore that, and I'm not going to. I've
been thinking about it for years. I'm not going I
I do want to get a house on a lake.
I do want to do that, but this is on
a river and you have to walk down the steep thing,
and then my dad's going to be like get the rope,

(07:59):
and and I just don't want to get that rope,
and I just don't want to like worry about the
dogs falling in, and then we just like we just
cruise on the river. And then my dad points out
like rookeries and different eagles.

Speaker 2 (08:11):
And hawks, like if you've seen one hawk, you've seen
them all.

Speaker 1 (08:14):
Even though I do get excited when I see hawks
because they're beautiful birds, but I just I don't know
what stresses me out about it.

Speaker 2 (08:18):
I haven't been down there.

Speaker 1 (08:20):
Yeah, I mean my aversion to nature and kites and
doing things that are like just sitting and breathing and
like listening to the to nature as hard. That's why
I've started running again. I'm starting to run again because
it's the only time that I can do an activity.
It's running in my pilates class are the only times.

(08:42):
And this but not this, because I'm talking that I
am quiet and with my thoughts. And yes, I'm listening
to music on a run, but I don't really like
think about the music. So I'm alone with my thoughts
during pilates and during and running, and those are the
only times. But PLATES was and giving it to me
enough because I'm too focused on how hard it is.

(09:03):
It has to be so like a medium level of
hard and then your mind can wonder. And I really
got some things figured out running this weekend. I really
like I was had to stop and jot notes down.
I just like the ideas, big ideas for stuff like
I have this interview coming up where I'm interviewing a
celebrity who's very very very very famous. Well, I can't

(09:30):
tell you not playing that game, is it?

Speaker 3 (09:34):
Well, who's the most famous? Is it Barack Obama?

Speaker 1 (09:37):
It's I mean, I would say this person's name is
just as recognizable as Barack Obama's maybe why I know,
no one knows, right, Noah, you know right, have to
show stop guessing.

Speaker 2 (09:48):
Stop guessing.

Speaker 1 (09:50):
But I'm doing an interview of a person who requested
me to interview them, and so I've been studying this
person's requested you. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (09:58):
Wow, so this famous this person said I want nick later.

Speaker 1 (10:02):
One of the coolest things that's ever happened to me.

Speaker 3 (10:03):
That's amazing.

Speaker 1 (10:04):
No question and.

Speaker 2 (10:06):
Interview with Oh my.

Speaker 3 (10:08):
God, I can't believe Leonardo DiCaprio.

Speaker 2 (10:11):
Asked you, it's up there, it's there. Wow, I'm not
joking you.

Speaker 1 (10:16):
He I have to lose I think, twenty years to
talk to him. But yeah, I don't know how you
do that, but somehow. But anyway, this I had some
like I needed to think. I've been like putting off.
Do you ever have something that's so big and like
you're nervous about that you just don't work on it?

Speaker 3 (10:35):
Oh god, yes, well that happens with trips for me.
What do you mean, like if I have a big
trip coming up, and I'm like nervous about it because
I don't want to go on it or whatever. I
just imagine it's not happening until the day I'm on
the plane.

Speaker 1 (10:48):
Okay, but how do you pack?

Speaker 3 (10:51):
Well, I guess the night before. All right, you got me, Nikki,
the night before. I uh, I'll pe you.

Speaker 1 (10:55):
That's what I do with trips too. People always like,
where are you going to be next weekend? I go,
I don't know. This weekend is what I'm thinking about tomorrow.
I don't look any I don't want to look ahead.
But this thing is something that I have to like
prepare for. So I went on a run, not wanting
to think about it. But then i'd started. I was
listening to this person, like I'm studying this person. So

(11:16):
I was listening to something that they've made while I
was running, and I got I was very inspired, and
I was like, oh, I think you know you always
try to I'm not a great interviewer. I've done it
a ton, but it's not something that i've like, I
really hone and work at and that's not going to
be expected of me for this because they're not picking

(11:36):
me this person didn't pick me because of they've seen
all of my interviews or whatever, and they're like, they
just pick me because I'm a person that they I
don't know why they picked me, but it's not I
don't have to be a good interviewer, but I do
want to ask questions that are like interesting.

Speaker 2 (11:52):
And but it's like.

Speaker 1 (11:56):
Has been asked everything. This person's been asked every thing possible.
My friends are like, you have to ask them about this,
and it's like some gossipy thing and I'm like, Annia goes,
You've got to ask about blah blah blah, and just
imagine it's like, wait, let's says I was interviewing Taylor Swift,
which is not Taylor Swift, but it would literally be
Anya being like, well, you gotta ask her what happened

(12:17):
with Joe? And I go, do you understand that I
would never ask her what happened with Joe even if
we were best friends sitting around a fire late at
night and we've had some cup glasses of wine even
though I don't drink. But she got me too because
she's Taylor Swift and she'd give me to do anything.
I would never, no matter nor how close. I got

(12:37):
to this person the question, Anya was like, you gotta
I was like, are you kidding me? Are we having
this conversation?

Speaker 2 (12:43):
There's no way I'm asking that question.

Speaker 1 (12:46):
But it's you're so good at interviews.

Speaker 4 (12:48):
I just want to let you know that, as a
person who has listened to you interview many, many people,
your best quality is that you don't you're.

Speaker 1 (12:57):
Not doing an interview.

Speaker 4 (12:58):
You're just having a conversation with people, and you are
so good at disarming them and just kind of like
getting the stuff that is very conversational, which is what
everybody wants to hear.

Speaker 1 (13:08):
I feel very inspired by this person, and that's a
really good place to come from, where you're like, oh,
I'm this always happens to me when I prepare for something.
I become an intense fan when I was maybe a
casual fan before, because you just you I read this
person's book this weekend.

Speaker 2 (13:25):
I just got done reading their.

Speaker 1 (13:27):
Wikipedia, which is you You might roll your eyes at that,
but that try to read some a very famous person's
entire Wikipedia. It's a hundred pages. It's so long, and
there's so many details, and there's so many like dates
and producers and things that You're just like, I don't
need this. You know, well, yes, this person has worked
with producers. But I'm just saying, like Wikipedia is dense

(13:48):
with like information you don't mean, but oh my god,
do you think Denzel Washington would be this person?

Speaker 2 (13:58):
Is it's relevant that.

Speaker 1 (13:59):
They pick to me, I will say that it has precedence,
but it's one of the most notable names on the planet,
is not christ Toffy, But yeah, so it's it's very exciting.
But anyway, I got some answers for that when I
was running, and I hate to be one of those
people that's like, I don't know, running just like opens
up my creativity and because running does suck, but I'm

(14:21):
starting to think that it doesn't and I actually need it,
and I want to start meditating again. I think that's
really what I'm in search for, because when I used
to meditate, I would get answers to things, I would
get ideas. I would get just big ideas of like
I should do a reality show.

Speaker 2 (14:36):
And then all of a sudden, I'm like, what would
that look like?

Speaker 1 (14:37):
And then I just send off an email right in
the middle of it, and I'm like, I want to
do a reality show. And then suddenly it's like happening,
Like you just get these big ideas that sometimes maybe
you don't want to, Like sometimes you have a big
idea and then you start it. Everyone can relate to
starting a project and then being in the middle of
it and being like, I don't want to really do
my own backsplash, I should have hired someone for this,

(14:58):
and like you're in the middle of like bluing all
these tiles together and you're like, what is this? And
then but you still have to finish it because you
can't just have no backsplash, I mean, can't you you can.

Speaker 3 (15:08):
It's not like I think you could survive without a backslash,
normal lifespan without a light, without a back man.

Speaker 1 (15:15):
When I learned the word backsplash, I really got liberal
with it because it made me feel cool that I
knew something about home design scance backsplash. There, I asked Chris,
what the what the edge around doors are? What's that
called molding? Molding? Why why can't we call it the edging?
Like why why is it to be more? Why is

(15:35):
a sconce Why can't be a light fixture that's on
the wall, Like why does it have to have a
name that's confusing and alienating. Oh can I ask a
football question that no one's been able to answer for me?

Speaker 3 (15:48):
I'll answer it.

Speaker 2 (15:49):
Okay, So sorry.

Speaker 1 (15:52):
If we talked about this on the podcast before, please
just interrupt me. If we have in football to get
a first down mm hmm, to get a down? Okay,
you get four chances, that's right? What are those chances
called downs? Why is the goal also the name of

(16:13):
the steps it takes to get the goal? That doesn't
make sense to me. So in any other in any
other thing, is the goal the name of the goal
also the steps? It's like, did I I don't even
know how to do?

Speaker 2 (16:26):
The rungs of a ladder are not called ladders?

Speaker 1 (16:29):
Do you know what I mean?

Speaker 3 (16:31):
Do you want? Your goal is to get a first down?

Speaker 1 (16:34):
Right? So it's for okay, so your goal is to
get a first down. But then people go it's first down?
So did they get it? Or is it the first
chance to get a first down? Why are they both
the same?

Speaker 3 (16:44):
I think you have to consider it like there's many
first downs on a field that every ten yards is
a first down?

Speaker 1 (16:49):
Okay, okay, but this isn't the issue to get a
first down, you have four chances to do it, and
those are called downs. Why is the thing you're trying
to get also called the steps to get it is
also the thing? No, what is this making any sense
to you?

Speaker 4 (17:05):
What's what's clicking in my head? While Brian thinks of
the answer is that you are basically answering the question
that you had before this, which is why do we
call it a scance because there are many light fixtures,
but a sconce is very specific, so that's why we
have sconce.

Speaker 1 (17:21):
But why what they name the thing like that I
don't know?

Speaker 2 (17:25):
Is to get a first down?

Speaker 1 (17:27):
And then you can literally say it's first down and
we're trying to get to first down. Well, then didn't
we get it if it's first down? A lot of football,
it's very confusing when you hear we're trying to get
a first down and it's first down.

Speaker 2 (17:39):
To get that first down, that is what.

Speaker 3 (17:41):
I can see. Yeah, I can not.

Speaker 1 (17:43):
Be so confusing. Why is everyone not confused by this?

Speaker 3 (17:47):
You get confused? Do you get confused by the concept
of laps? Like you have to run laps? You have
to and every time you go around it's another lap.
So it's circular in.

Speaker 1 (17:59):
A way, I know, but four laps equal a mile,
it doesn't equal a lap. It's not first lap, second lap,
third lap, fourth lap, and then you get first lap.
It's a one mile after four laps. Do you know
what I'm saying?

Speaker 2 (18:12):
Is this?

Speaker 3 (18:12):
I do?

Speaker 1 (18:12):
Because anytime I talk I talked to Chris about this.
I think I took to Sean O'Connor about this. They
don't even seem as frustrated as I am with this.
This has never this has never occurred to anyone. How
has this not occurred to anyone else? But the name
of the steps to get the thing is the thing?

Speaker 3 (18:26):
The name of this. Yeah, it's difficult for me to
get frustrated because it's hard to even understand what you're saying.

Speaker 1 (18:33):
But when you first how is it hard?

Speaker 3 (18:36):
Well, it's hard for me to understand, uh, the frustration
behind it. So I need to come up with an analogy.
That's my goal. It's to come up with an analogy
outside of football where the same thing happens that we've accepted.

Speaker 1 (18:49):
But okay, when I tell you, hey, so we're trying
to get a first down here and it's first down,
that makes sense to you right, that's that is a sentence.
I mean, no one would say that, but because everyone
knows first down.

Speaker 3 (19:00):
I'm trying to I'm trying to earn a thousand dollars,
but I already have one thousand dollars. You can get
another thousand dollars. You can get it. You can get many.

Speaker 1 (19:09):
First No, no, you, I understand you can get many first downs.
I'm talking about. The chances that you have to get
a first down are called downs.

Speaker 3 (19:18):
That's right.

Speaker 1 (19:19):
So it's second down to get a first down, it's
third down to get a first down. It's so why
are the chances to get it called the thing? I
hope anyone listening understands what the fuck I'm talking about,
because to someone who's learned, it's almost like when you
learn a language late in life. There are things about
the English language that are totally confusing, like though and

(19:40):
rough being the same, like though o g u oug
h can be uugh off or oh, and it's like
why And I think that's kind of a similar thing
I'm going by, which is like I would never have
noticed the though and rough being different unless I was
learning the language, and I'm learning the language of football
and I am confounded by it.

Speaker 3 (19:58):
Yeah, no, I can. I see you're what you're saying.

Speaker 2 (20:01):
And why is a safety a position?

Speaker 1 (20:02):
But it's also a call?

Speaker 3 (20:05):
Why do we park on a driveway and drive on
a parkway?

Speaker 1 (20:08):
No, I really need an answer here? Is there is there?
Is there a correlation between the safety position and the
safety play? Are those two related at all? Or do
they just happen to have the same name.

Speaker 3 (20:22):
They happen to have the same name. I mean what,
I guess you could they ran out? Well, this was
you have to remember, Nikki, that football was invented in
the nineteen twenties or whatever.

Speaker 1 (20:35):
Yeah, we have less words.

Speaker 3 (20:36):
There were less words back then, and you know what,
the dictionary was only three pages and if didn't even
go to Z.

Speaker 1 (20:43):
But it's a confusing game already. Why double up on
words of meanings?

Speaker 3 (20:49):
No? I get it. Yeah, safety safety is a position
because they are the last person that can stop you
from getting a touchdowns line of defense and then getting
a safety is the worst possible thing that could happen
to the embarrassing. It's embarrassing. So it's like kind of

(21:12):
when a safety happens, it is embarrassing, Like, yeah, because
I get that everything you're backed up, you're backed up
against your own end zone. You know they're going to
try to sack you in your own end zone, which.

Speaker 1 (21:22):
Is already embarrassing your own home.

Speaker 3 (21:24):
Yeah, but usually even when you're just watching it happen,
what the quarterback does to avoid the safety is generally
goofy and dumb looking like sometimes they'll go back and
they'll step out of their own end zone backwards. Sometimes
they'll be like flailing around and stumble, and they'll try
to like throw the ball haplessly across the line of scrimmage,

(21:44):
but it'll look stupid, and then they get you. They
get a penalty, and then it's a safety anyway. Or
they'll just like try to run forward and get smashed,
and they're a quarterback and they're not a rushing quarterback,
so they look like a dufist. It really is one
of the most embarrassing plays to fall victim too is
a safety.

Speaker 1 (22:02):
Okay, I'm slowly figuring it out, but I learned nothing
from this conversation except I'm a little bit more conf'm now.
I'm just getting frustrated that other people don't understand what
I'm going through. And if you do Bestie's someone write
to me if you're confused by the down thing too,
or if you have an answer for it. I'm sure
there's some person that will be like, well, the down
was named after something. I just want to know why

(22:24):
we have to use the same word for two different
things within the same concept. And then we're gonna go
to break. I'm gonna tell you a new word I
learned this weekend that I am proud I learned because
I'm trying to learn new vocabulary and I got rid
of that old app and I got a new app.
I'll tell you about it, all right, all right, I'm back, Okay.

(22:46):
So we talked about that app I downloaded last week, Elevate,
and it just wasn't doing it for me because it
was repeating games and.

Speaker 2 (22:56):
I learned a little bit, but not enough.

Speaker 1 (22:58):
And so I went on a quest to find like
a really good new vocab app, and I recommend atlass English.
So it'll it'll give you groups of five words, and
I will say you probably know it'll test your your
level of vocab at first, and you're gonna be like,
oh my god, this is so stupid. But then it
gets hard and you're like oh my god, wait, I'm
so stupid. And then it places you, and then it

(23:19):
gives you groups of words that you probably know probably
three out of the five, and then you do all
these games where you like fill in the blanks and
you you like go over the definition in many different ways,
and then you still might not remember the word, because
like for me, I'm just trying to memorize new words,
work them into my vocabulary. And this one the other
day I could not get even though I played like

(23:40):
six games with it where it was mixed in with
other words, and I was trying to fill in the blank. Inculpate.
Did I get it right? Hold on? It sends me
it every day, so yes, inculpate I nculpat to accuse
or blame. It was not landing. It is now you know,
so now in my head.

Speaker 4 (24:01):
Sometimes in words you have other words and it's like
culprit cold. Yeah, so the words culprit in there, that's.

Speaker 2 (24:07):
Good inculpate to blame someone. But it was not sticking.

Speaker 1 (24:10):
And I was like, damn it, no matter how many
games I play in the stupid app, it's not gonna stick.
And I kept trying to like remember it to Chris,
and I would just go get a drink of water,
and then I would return and be like, can I
remember it? No, it's gone. So then I realized, though
this is right after I downloaded the app and played
the game. I was like, damn it, it's not working.
But then I kind of bookmarked it in the app
to be like I need this. I don't know even

(24:31):
how I did it. It just said like save words.
And so now it just shows me throughout the day.
It'll just pull up inculpate. It'll just send me a
little like text like boop at the top of my thing.
Inculpate to accuse or blame, and I swear it's incepted
me now, And now I've learned that word. I also
learned mendacious or mendacity, which is a lot like to
something that lies a lot, if they're mendacious.

Speaker 2 (24:53):
And then I also learned.

Speaker 3 (24:55):
I didn't know that mendacious is an sat word. I
thought I knew what it meant, and I guess I don't.

Speaker 1 (25:00):
Yeah, it's I think it's to someone lies a lot, Yeah,
if you're mendacious. And then the other word, oh my god,
please let me. It's to castigate. Castigate is to like
not accuse or blame. Castigate is to like punish. I think, Man,
did I get it right? Castigate someone? Look it up.

(25:21):
That's the other word I learned. So I learned. Yeah,
I'm going to castigate you. So I'm gonna I learned
three new words this weekend that are locked in, like
they're for the rest of my life almost, And you
can do that too, if that's of interest to anyone.
I don't know if anyone cares about this shit, but
stuff like that, I love. Stuff matters to me.

Speaker 3 (25:40):
So wait, all you did to get those locked in
was focused on just those.

Speaker 1 (25:44):
Three Yeah, well, I bookmarked them. I played all the
games that they had. They're kind of boring games. They're like,
you know, you have to put them in a blank
and like you get five words, and so those five
words become game. You do gameplay with those five words.
It gives you the definition. You review them, and then
it gives you sentences and it is a blank and
then you have to put the five words and put
them in.

Speaker 2 (26:04):
Then it's like it does. It does a bunch of.

Speaker 1 (26:06):
Different games and you and you think those games help,
but this sometimes you need extra And then getting those
alerts all day I'm like, it has been my goal inculpate.
I don't like the word it mouth to say it.
It doesn't sound good. It sounds like sound too smart.
I don't know that I'll use it, but at least
it's there for me if I want to inculpate. It

(26:27):
sounds like a.

Speaker 3 (26:28):
Word for trying to use it.

Speaker 1 (26:30):
Thank you?

Speaker 4 (26:31):
Oh does it sound like it sounds like a word
you could use, like if you're ever doing some kind
of written interview or just just kind of more for.

Speaker 3 (26:39):
A doesn't sound like a word that you could slip
into the conversation and considered.

Speaker 2 (26:43):
People are going to go, what, Yeah, excuse me.

Speaker 3 (26:47):
Oh, I guess you're miss smarty pants.

Speaker 1 (26:49):
It's honestly, if I ever meet Sam Harris, I'll try
to talk about it.

Speaker 2 (26:54):
That's literally that.

Speaker 3 (26:55):
That's casting at you. But I feel inculpated in this.

Speaker 2 (27:00):
Yeah, these are words he would use. For sure.

Speaker 3 (27:03):
I have a word that you can use in any
situation that makes you sound cool and smart. Yeah, it
is mercurial.

Speaker 1 (27:12):
Dude, that is so weird you said it. I read
it in a book to like last week. I've read
this book The Color of Everything. He said it in
that I looked it up because I've heard it. I've
used it twice in one week, yeah, and not called
it out and just slipped it in because it's a
great word. Great.

Speaker 3 (27:29):
It makes sense logically because someone.

Speaker 1 (27:31):
Who's moody goes up and down, like you can't predict
their mood.

Speaker 3 (27:35):
Yeah, that's a word.

Speaker 2 (27:36):
I love it.

Speaker 3 (27:37):
It encapsulates a concept that people can easily understand that
we don't have a word for. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (27:42):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (27:43):
And also it's like kind of cool because it's based
on mercury, the planet and the god, which then people
can like logically understand even if they don't know the
definition of the word, they can infer Oh, mercury. That
sounds like fire at least.

Speaker 1 (27:58):
So it was so crazy, Yeah, we're yeah, that's a
good way to remember it.

Speaker 3 (28:03):
It could be that as well.

Speaker 1 (28:07):
Crazy that you said that, Brian, because I literally used
that word on girls Chat. Noah, you could probably find
the girl like I used it on girls Chat, and
I felt like, did I just use that correctly? I
think I did. I can't believe I did it. It
is very exciting to learn a new word. I will
say that I was watching I was binging Sarah Silverman
when I was in North Dakota because I couldn't sleep

(28:27):
and I just went down a wormhole on her, and
my god, is she's so funny and she's I've like,
you know, just haven't paid attention. I guess in the
past ten years as much as I used to, Like
I used to be Taylor Swift levels of obsessed with
Sarah Silverman. Yeah, like I had posters, I had, you know,
I would buy books that she said in interviews. She

(28:50):
liked like I was obsessed with her in college to
a pretty insane degree and concerning degree. And then I
kind of just like, like, I don't I stop paying attention.
Maybe I was just like I don't want to be
influenced anymore because I was sounding so much like her
early on in my career. Whatever it was I put.
I went on YouTube wormhol the other day and I
was up till like three in the morning just watching

(29:11):
clips of hers. She is so fucking funny, dude, I was.
She did this one joke where she was talking about
her dog like licking up like uh like licking her
after her and her boyfriend had sex, like post coitus,
and she said he was licking the dety Deti Deutch dirt. Wow,

(29:32):
what is it called. It's like detrius or something. It's
a word for like the leftover gunk, like the I
forget the word for it, but she uses this crazy
big word. And she was like, I use that because
I'm talking about com and I wanted to just make
it sound more palatable, like the detrius or something. She
was like, he was fricking detritus. She used that word,

(29:53):
and I like that. Yeah, So she used that to
uplift the whole joke that was really just like her
dog licking up come. And then she had a point
that I have also made before, which is like the
dog wants to have that, like you would say that's animal,
because she stopped the dog. She's like, no, no, no, But
she made the point of like the dog actually does

(30:13):
want that very badly and would not be disgusted by it,
and it would be treat for the dog.

Speaker 2 (30:18):
But you can't let the.

Speaker 1 (30:19):
Dog do that.

Speaker 3 (30:22):
My dog's been licking up piss all over town and
I have to keep stopping.

Speaker 1 (30:27):
Him from because it is like human piss.

Speaker 3 (30:30):
Yeah, human, no, dog probably dog pissed. I mean, I can't.

Speaker 1 (30:34):
Assume that a new trait that they've picked up their
dogs picked up, she's picked up he.

Speaker 3 (30:39):
He Jack yeah, Jack looking up piss all the time.
I don't know if it's new, but I'm kind of
noticing it more and over the last year or so,
I've been like trying to train him to not do
it anymore.

Speaker 1 (30:50):
Right, well, because that's then you you want him to
lick your face too. We're not going to give that up.

Speaker 3 (30:56):
No, I mean I don't actually I don't let him look.

Speaker 1 (30:58):
My face, but really skin is so good.

Speaker 3 (31:00):
He'll lick my hand, that's cute, yeah or something, but
like no, yeah, I think it's just more like I'm
worried about like parasites. I'm just like, I don't want
him to get a disease from Yeah, I piss.

Speaker 1 (31:10):
I remember hearing if your dog sniffs poop that has
worms in it, they can sniff up the worms in
their nose. And so whenever my dog's sniffing poop, I'm like, kid,
what like, yeah, way too, because I just picture worms
being like like snorting worms so horrible and I can't
handle it.

Speaker 3 (31:26):
Oh I can't handle it. Oh God, no, okay, no, no, no,
I do have something. Speaking of Sarah Silverman, did you
see Adam Sandler's Netflix special that came out.

Speaker 1 (31:35):
I saw the first thirty five minutes of it because
we got tired. It was way too late at night
for us to start it. But I was enjoying myself.
It's a wild ride. I like don't understand even what
I'm watching sometimes, even though I will say, all the
songs and all the jokes are so fucking funny and
like it was almost getting frustrating because I I'm so

(31:57):
jealous of how his mind works in terms of like creates,
Like it's just a different mind than mine comedically, and
I really wish I was of structure, free of any
like logic.

Speaker 2 (32:10):
Yeah, for a reason.

Speaker 1 (32:11):
And then the voices are so funny and you just
get lost in the storytelling is crazy and and you
don't know whether he's telling the truth sometimes, and then
the story will take a turn that is just so insane,
but it still works, and it's like such a risks
to take that and then it pays off. It's just
it really is incredible. I can't wait to finish it.
To me your thoughts.

Speaker 3 (32:32):
And it works because it also works because it's Adam Sandler,
or and he when he starts a story you have this,
you know who he is. You already like him, you
have this whole backstory. You imagine he's telling the truth,
and then he can undercut you. Whereas I think if
a new comedian came out and started telling like fantastical
stories of a similar manner, it probably wouldn't work as well.

Speaker 1 (32:50):
I don't know, I disagree. I think this is this
is why Adam Sandler ever worked.

Speaker 3 (32:57):
Actually, now that you say that, I have an example
already to pop them in. I had that it did work.
Who this comedian from Boston named Brian Higginbottom who sadly
tragically died, but he had this he had he was
blowing up on TikTok. He's this comedian from Boston who
everyone liked, and around twenty twenty two or three or something,
he just started blowing up on TikTok purely by posting

(33:20):
clips from the one ten minute set that he had recorded.
It was like the only material he had recorded that
he like put on the internet, and just those ten
clips like started he started blowing up. He started getting
hundreds of thousands of followers, okay, and and like I
felt like, you know, wow, this guy's I was very
focused on that because it's like it's another Brian and

(33:41):
this is my He's like funnier than me, And was
that part of it.

Speaker 1 (33:45):
I can see myself being like there's another Nikki and
being like, what's going on here? There's only room for
one of us on this nome.

Speaker 3 (33:50):
Yeah, well there's already Brian Reagan, so I'm fucked. But yeah,
this guy was funnier than me, and he was blowing
up on TikTok and I was like, this guy's of
a scent in a similar way to let that, like
Scott Seiss ascended after his Instagram videos?

Speaker 2 (34:05):
Is he the guy that goes the he works in retail?

Speaker 3 (34:08):
Yeah exactly. I thought like the same thing was gonna
happen to Brian Higginbottom, and unfortunately I think he you know,
I don't know how he died, but I think it
was what you would imagine. So he was just about
to blow up. But I'm sorry he had a This
part of his bit was talking about his son that
he didn't have, and he kept just like exaggerating these
aspects of his son, saying like he's like ten foot tall,

(34:32):
he's got one eye and one tooth, and he's teaching
him how to shoot a bow and arrow, and he
tries to incite the audience to take this kid down
because he's a menace to society. And like, that's the
type of exaggeration that Adam Sandler might do, and it
worked for Brian Higginbottom, an unknown comedian. So I rescind
my previous statement as the point.

Speaker 1 (34:50):
Okay, I do think that Adam could get. This is
what built Adam Sandler is, like the voices and like
the just silly, the silliness, yeah, and just being free
to be silly and just and seeming just like a
good dude throughout it all, even though he has a
joke where his dad's penis pokes him in the eye.

(35:11):
If there's some crazy stuff in this, he goes down
on a balloon. It's just so, it's so you guys,
it's so weird. But what were you going to say,
did you?

Speaker 2 (35:21):
The song is really good?

Speaker 3 (35:24):
Well, the song at the end, yeah, it's really it's
a heartfelt song at the end, and and as as
a person of in comedy, it's doubly uh sad and touching.
But what stuck out to me for the special was
the direction, the directing.

Speaker 2 (35:41):
And the oh yeah.

Speaker 3 (35:43):
Yeah, and just the way that he approached the special
to make it like, you know, he's an arena comedian.
He's selling on arenas and he chose to shoot like
a a staged special and a shithole where about the
things went wrong?

Speaker 1 (35:58):
A lot of things went wrong. Yeah, but don't you
think that they went wrong on purpose?

Speaker 3 (36:03):
Yes? No, it's all staged.

Speaker 1 (36:04):
Okay, good anyone who's thinking that the screens like I
read a review of it and they're like, we don't
know if the screens really didn't work, or if that
was stage, or if there really was a fight in
the audience or if that was stage and it's like
every single or if he didn't I got confused. There
was one part where he has a coffee and he's like,

(36:24):
is there is this Stevia And they're like yeah, and
he's like yeah, and then he's like no, that's splendor
and I go, oh, that's real, and Chris is like no,
it's not. No, this is all set up, and it's
very I said.

Speaker 3 (36:35):
His windshield's broken at the beginning, and the guy.

Speaker 1 (36:39):
Like pay, but there's I'm waiting for any of this
to pay off, Like the screen's not working, paying off.

Speaker 2 (36:43):
I'm thinking it's just like.

Speaker 1 (36:46):
Embedded in it to create I don't I don't know
the purpose of it yet.

Speaker 3 (36:51):
I mean ironic because he's Adam Sandler, He's one of
the biggest stars in the world, and he's okay ship
all where they can't get the screens to work. But
then also it's it's comedic trolling for anybody who thinks
that it's real. And also it's just it's just comedy
in general. It's just like, isn't it funny? The whole thing. Also,
just from the start to the finish, I appreciated because

(37:13):
it felt like not a stand up special. It felt
like I was watching a movie of somebody trying to
yes exactly.

Speaker 1 (37:20):
Which I was totally. I thought that was good too,
and I liked all the things, like it kind of
showed what his life is like in terms of the
demand of someone like being like, can you FaceTime with
my somebody he's he's been a scooter accident. Okay, can
you sign all these jerseseys it's for an MS charity?
Can you do like all the asks he's getting before
he goes on stage. But I'm guessing come from such

(37:41):
a real place. But I just I just love his
songs and his his and.

Speaker 3 (37:46):
The comedy is good too on.

Speaker 1 (37:47):
Top of it, but all of it's so good. He's
so cute, he's so great, he's so likable.

Speaker 3 (37:52):
Fun fact and yeah, this is maybe a Nicky Glazer
podcast exclusive fact as he dropped the microphone embarrassing that
I was basically just got a safety of podcast. So
Adam Sandler filmed that special at the Nocturn Theater in Glendale, California. Okay,

(38:14):
really close to La. Yeah, and there's only been one
other comedy special filmed at the Nocturn Theater in Glendale
at the time. Another one, there's a yeah, there's another one,
and that was Adam Conover's stand up special, which is
coming out on Dropout TV this month.

Speaker 2 (38:35):
What is dropout TV?

Speaker 3 (38:38):
Dropout TV is what College Humor has become. It's a
subscription service online that has bespoke content for pretty much nerds.
But it's extremely popular and successful and has found an
incredible niche. It's really quite remarkable how the College Humor
guy for got his name, Ricky, Yeah, Ricky Valez a committee,

(39:00):
he's a comedian, No, but he was Mayor Van Veen
Sam Reich.

Speaker 1 (39:05):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (39:06):
Okay, Well, anyway, it's amazing how after College Humor ended
he still managed to create a brand new thing that
is now almost just as successful as College Humor and
drop Out TV.

Speaker 1 (39:17):
Okay, well, but the point is.

Speaker 3 (39:19):
The point is two specials filmed with the Nocturne Theater,
both by comedians named Adam.

Speaker 1 (39:24):
Oh wow, we're on this first name thing again. Yeah,
are there any other nicky comedians?

Speaker 3 (39:30):
Well, your biggest competition, in my mind, Your biggest competition
in my mind is Nicky Hayley. Yeah, who spells her
name the same way and is going totally different directions.

Speaker 2 (39:40):
So interesting to try to be a president.

Speaker 1 (39:43):
Yeah, when your name is NICKI I know, I always
knew that was never in the cards for me, not
just because I'm a woman, but also because or I
felt it wasn't in the cards because I was a woman,
but also Nicky is just not a serious person. No
offense to me, Yeah, but it's just like it's just
not my mom. That my parents gave me the name

(40:03):
Nicole on my birth certificate in case I wanted to
be a serious person. That that's what they said, in case,
you know, when you wanted to be a professional and
I never needed it, but it is there and I've
never been called it in my life, but people are
always surprised that that is my my name.

Speaker 3 (40:20):
But with Bernie, like Bernie Sanders, like that's not a serious.

Speaker 1 (40:27):
I never even thought about that. So I can't stop
buying Taylor swift merch. It's honestly become a problem. I
don't I every single day I make a new purchase.
It's there's too much of it. It's actually I brought
I bought four three new sweatshirts and a T shirt

(40:50):
this morning. I got a package last night that Chris
was cracking up because it's just a bunch of random
crap that I kind of some of it I already own.
It's I don't I don't know what's happening why I
need all this stuff, And I don't even like wear
it all that often. And when I do, I because
I do want to connect with other Swifties, and that's
why I wear it, I think, but I don't really

(41:11):
get to connect with those. No one ever talks to
me about it, So I kind of feel just like dumb.
I feel like a real safety in it sometimes because
I just feel like, uh, I want to connect, people
aren't connecting with it. I am also feeling like shopping
is like bringing me is I'm using it as a
crutch sometimes. Online shopping, getting packages, getting new things so awarting.

Speaker 2 (41:35):
You just get that little dope, Oh my.

Speaker 3 (41:38):
God, you're addicted to And it's so easy.

Speaker 2 (41:42):
When it's apples.

Speaker 1 (41:44):
Every day I buy a new thing because there's a
new sale going on yesterday. Emily, my social media girl
who I talked about last week, she was like, a girl,
there is a sale on Abercrombie twenty percent off all
NFL merch You need to get cheap stuff. This stuff
is so cute. She sent me like four screenshots that
was like, just send me the links. I need this stuff.
I bought a Chief's jacket. I bought a Chief sweat,

(42:05):
two Chief sweatshirts, a Chief's T shirt, all mends. Don't
really know if I got the right sizing, but that
counts as Taylor Swiths merchandise too, by the way, Like
this is not this is this is what it is.
That's like all I buy now. I really don't know.
There's really no guide on how to fucking dress as
a professional like woman in this world try to send

(42:27):
me and I've asked for this before. There's no one
telling you how to shop anymore. And some besties sent
me like Page Disorbo's Amazon account, which was helpful, except
everything sold out and she hasn't updated it in forever.
And I will wear anything Page disorber wears because she's
the cutest, even though it won't look that cute on me.
But show me a blog where girls put together an

(42:49):
outfit and you can just buy everything on the outfit.
Show me one, just give me one. Weren't they around
a lot? Like, No, it wasn't it was the past.
This was like twenty thirteen. I remember following cute girls
blogs blog spots, and you go when you would click
on the picture and there would be all the links
to the things that they bought. Now I don't know
where to go. Like when you type in like cute fault,

(43:12):
like what sneakers are people wearing this fall? Or like
what kind of boot style is in this fall? You
get all different. I don't know what. I don't know
what type of shoe to wear? Shoes are confounding to
me girls, I don't know what, because sometimes a style
will go out so quickly and be so bad looking
to people who know fashion, and I'm so embarrassed to

(43:35):
wear it. And sometimes I ask my friend Sara Lena
because she just has natural good style that like shifts
with the culture and she doesn't even have to try,
and so I'll be like, do you think these are cute?
And she's too nice to be like no, So I
don't even ask her anymore because I just know she'll
be nice but like, and I don't want to bother
her to be like, will you find the right shoe
for this dress? But I don't know what? I know
You're like, get a stylist. I do have stylists. They're

(43:55):
very expensive and I love them so much and they're
good for like an outfit here and there when I'm
going to an event where I need to look head
to so amazing, but I can't afford them on a
day to day basis. I don't know what you're supposed
to do, Noah, Like I go to Free People, which
is like, oh, they have a lot of cute shit.
I'm overwhelmed. I don't know how to put it together.

Speaker 4 (44:13):
Me too, I have the app and I just spend
so waste so much time scrolling through. I have the
same shoe problem. I don't know what shoes to wear.

Speaker 2 (44:21):
I don't know what shoes to wear.

Speaker 1 (44:22):
I don't know if it's cute to have a chunky heel.
I don't know if it's cute to have big straps.
I don't know if it's bad to have your feet out.
I don't know if it's good to have Like, I
don't know what to wear, and I don't see anyone
trying to help us. And I am not blunt. No
one's trying to help us. And so that's why I
buy Taylor Swift merch because I feel in some way
it's been approved by Taylor Swift, thus it must be cool.

(44:45):
Even though she doesn't wear her own merch, which is fine,
I still feel the ed's approved it, so I will
wear it. That's why Taylor Swift styled. Whenever they say
what she wore, I buy it because it's already approved
by someone. But I don't know who to trust. You
can't go to shop bop dot co and be like,
what are the best sellers? They're lying to you when
it's best sellers. And also I don't even know who's
buying from Shop pop it could be girls without good style.

(45:06):
I don't know what's bestseller I can't trust.

Speaker 3 (45:08):
Isn't this what influencers are? Like? I feel like every
time I see an influencer, they're always saying They're always
like showing a picture of their clothes and then just
saying where they got them from?

Speaker 1 (45:16):
No, these girls, I'm not kidding you. I'm I'm sorry.
Alex Brenstein, not the girl who does the lowest.

Speaker 2 (45:24):
Voice okay on Family Guy.

Speaker 1 (45:26):
But there's another girl that has a similar name, cutest
style going. I am obsessed with her. Sorry, I haven't
learned her name. It's something like that. But you know
how you know someone very well, but you've never like
read their name. Does that make any sense to anyone?
And like really put it in your head? It's so embarrassing.
It happens to me all the time. But she has
a great style. But I will click and be like,

(45:48):
what where is this from? And I like can't find it.
Like they'll just do the link to like the the
it's always Chanelle or Gucci or something, and I'm not
buying that shit, Like I want to know what to
get at Zara.

Speaker 2 (46:00):
But I also feel bad about that.

Speaker 3 (46:02):
I don't. I don't know.

Speaker 1 (46:04):
I just don't know what to wear. And that's I
think that's the root of why I'm buying Taylor Swift
Merchant because I feel in some way it's been approved
by someone whose style I like. Yeah, and it really hasn't.
It's just a safe thing for me to buy.

Speaker 3 (46:17):
In the future and the near future, you're gonna be
watching TV Amazon especially, You're going to be seeing someone
wearing something on a TV show and then you can
just click on that thing they're wearing and you'll be
able to buy it from your TV.

Speaker 1 (46:32):
Why isn't that here yet? This technology was promised to us.
I feel like flying cars like many years ago.

Speaker 3 (46:39):
Like I think Amazon's going to do it first. I
guarantee and.

Speaker 1 (46:44):
Shorts T shirts. Now I look like a scrub everywhere
I go. I'm disappointing to the masses who have any
kind of Like I went to a store the other
day and I looked so disgusting that and I was
returning clothes, which is never I'm gonna tell a story
I when I get back from break because it's kind
of fun. So I went to a store the other

(47:06):
day to return some items which I never do. I
was so proud of myself, but I'm also nervous because
whenever I return items, I always feel like I'm breaking
the law somehow, like i've somehow like like I'm not
a person who wears things and then returns them, even
though I know that's a thing. So I think they
think I'm doing that, which is totally gross to do
with the kind of ath leisure wear that I was returning.
But I walked in the store and I was wearing

(47:27):
a grubby tailor swift shirt.

Speaker 2 (47:28):
Not because it's grubby.

Speaker 1 (47:29):
Inherently, it was grubby because I everything I wash and
dry goes to shit for some reason. Like things just
look grubby that I own because I'm stained. I'm a
stained person. And so call back to a million episodes ago.
But and then I was wearing biker shorts that had
like dog hair on them. I just looked like, and
this is the day I woke up at twelve thirty five,
This was yesterday. Yeah, And so I walked I walked

(47:53):
to this place with my dog, and I have a
baseball cap on.

Speaker 2 (47:58):
I just look not good.

Speaker 1 (48:00):
I know it. My face is puffy, everything's disheveled, and
I'm returning these items, which by the way, it wasn't
in the bag from the place they went to, like
like I'm returning them to so it's like the items
are in a different bag, you know what. Like it
just it's that doesn't make you feel good. I always
feel like a criminal when I'm doing that, Like I
always like to find the bag.

Speaker 3 (48:22):
With grocery store bag. It wasn't like a Ralph's, was it.

Speaker 2 (48:25):
No random toe.

Speaker 4 (48:29):
They never take a bag though when I try to
return it with the bag, I want them to reuse it,
and they just always give it back, so they don't.

Speaker 2 (48:36):
They'll just throw it away.

Speaker 1 (48:37):
But it does look you make you look legitimate, like, oh,
she's been here before, she shops here. She didn't just
buy the like get these on the street first.

Speaker 3 (48:45):
She was here recently enough that she still has the
bag there.

Speaker 1 (48:49):
It just makes you feel like you belong and that
you're not doing anything shifty, even though I wasn't. Even
though I did try on the shirt and these the
tags at this place are safety pin on, so I
took it off because I thought the shirt was one
hundred percent gonna fit, and it one hundred percent it
like two hundred percent did not fit.

Speaker 2 (49:06):
It was like three sizes too small. So I immediately
put the tag back on.

Speaker 1 (49:10):
But I didn't know where the tag was safety pinned
on it, so I disclosed that. I said, hey, I
tried this on. Once I took the safety pin tag off,
I put it back on. It's not in the right spot.
You're gonna have to put it back in the right spot.
She didn't care. She didn't even like I thought, maybe
she was like listening to headphones or something. You know
when you talk to someone and they don't reply, and
you go, oh, headphones. At least that's what I hope

(49:30):
people do for me when I don't reply to them,
because that is the case. But she didn't say anything.
She wasn't listening to headphones. She just heard me, I guess,
but didn't care to respond to that. And she's kind
of like sorting through these clothes and a couple of
them have little like two pieces of dog hair on it.
I see it in the light and I'm like, oh,
oh my god, this looks so gross. Even though I
literally tried it on and like took it right off
and I checked for deodorant stains, like it was clear,

(49:50):
but it maybe had two pieces of dog hair, but
I just felt grubby, like, oh my god, I'm such
a bad person.

Speaker 2 (49:56):
I felt bad.

Speaker 1 (49:57):
And then I even like was trying to light the mood,
and I was like, oh my I literally thought I
was two sizes smaller than I was when I bought
these blindly the other day.

Speaker 2 (50:04):
And still nothing.

Speaker 1 (50:06):
And I go, oh god, you know, I this girl
hates me. I hate myself honestly, and I hope she
rejects this. And she goes, do you have the receipt?
And I was like, yeah, I have an emailed hold
on one second, so I'm looking up the receipt. She's like,
I'll just get your number. And at this moment, I
had the thought that I hope she knows who I am.

(50:27):
I've never had that thought. I literally don't have that thought.
Maybe once or twice I've been like, oh, so I
can get a good table or something, or they can
make it work for us to get a table at
a place. I've been like, I hope I get recognized,
but it's never really on the front. It's it doesn't
occur to me. But in this moment, I was like,
I want her to know I'm not a scrub, you know, like.

Speaker 2 (50:46):
I just and that's a quick way to know.

Speaker 1 (50:48):
And so I give her my number and she goes, oh,
oh my god, I love you. Oh my god, why
are you here? What are you doing here? And I
was like I live here, and she was like, wait,
but aren't you on tour? And she was like she
like knew at me. And then suddenly she got very
nice and was totally understanding of this. But it was
but listen, I would have done the same thing. I
mean sometimes at work, you're just like not in the
mood for shit, and you're just trying to get your

(51:10):
job done in its labor day and you're working and.

Speaker 3 (51:12):
Working doesn't give her, that's for sure.

Speaker 1 (51:16):
Yeah, for sure. So I didn't even begrudge her. She
wasn't didn't have like an attitude before. She just wasn't
like she was just doing her job. And then she
totally lit up and was so nice, and I felt
I felt that, uh, that little like Julia Roberts Pretty
Woman moment of like big mistake, huge, like oh now,

(51:36):
But instead it was just me returning things, so like,
it's not like that you could have made a lot
of money off of me. I'm like Wow, you just
lost money, and it was it was a huge mistake
because I could have walked out of here and not
returned these things, Like what was I trying to prove?

Speaker 2 (51:51):
But it felt good in that moment too. And then
I go, I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 (51:54):
I looked like shit and she was like, no, you
look amazing, And that was a lie.

Speaker 2 (51:57):
But that was so nice of her too.

Speaker 1 (52:00):
But that was that was like all you returning three
items and getting two hundred and twenty one dollars back
on some kind of card is a great feeling. It
felt like I had earned that money by not keeping
those clothes. Is that the way to make you feel
like you earn money is just to buy things, in
them return them.

Speaker 3 (52:18):
Well, yeah, because especially if you're a person who'll just
throw it out or donate it and then it is
all and then it is like you already you spent
the money, so you put in the effort because you
did do work. I did get the money back.

Speaker 1 (52:30):
Oh, I only bought the items. Let me be honest
with you, because I went, I was bored. This place
is near where I live. I walked in. I didn't
want to buy anything. I didn't even like anything, but
I just felt like the shop person. It was like
just kind of I thought, again, like this shop person

(52:50):
thinks I'm grubby and things, I don't have money, and
I want to just prove that I am like an
actual person that like, even though the person was very
helpful and was like can I get you a size
in that, like, I could just tell that I wanted
to make it worth their while that they went and
got a size even though I didn't even want to
size with it, and so I was I was literally
pressured into buying the thing, which and that's why I

(53:11):
go like, oh my god, this is why I like
online shopping. No one's being like that looks cute on you?
Do you want a size on that? What's going on?
Thank you so much to people who work in retail.
I know it is a thankless and awful job because
you like clean up after people and you really realize
how like shitty human beings are. But I don't ever
need any help ever in a retail store. I don't

(53:32):
think I've ever want and I'm maybe not like a
lot of people because I'm you know, I have lots
of friends who are like like to try on things
and like, oh they are excited to have someone go,
I'll start a room for you. I've never wanted anyone
to start a room for me. I don't I can't
buy the item.

Speaker 3 (53:48):
People try them on at home?

Speaker 2 (53:49):
Yeah, one time, Oh, if they tell you something looks cute.

Speaker 3 (53:52):
I rarely ever go into a store to buy clothes,
but one time, in my memory, I went to Bonobos.
You know Bonobos.

Speaker 2 (54:00):
Oh yeah, went oh, and they are very customer service heavy.

Speaker 3 (54:03):
Yeah. They give you like they're like, do you want
a beer? And I'm like what, yeah, yeah, And I'm
trying on these shorts and I remember I was trying
and I was with someone who I barely know, and
I tried on these salmon shorts that were like, oh,
that's really high, and I was like, wait is this me?
Can I actually wear these? And everyone around me was like, oh,

(54:26):
those are amazing, They're so good. And so I bought
these salmon shorts and the first time I was wearing them,
I was like, I feel like a freak. I would
never wear high high salmon shorts ever, and this was
a huge mistake. And so I was like, so, how
could I trust these The retail person who's telling me
that it looks so amazing when they were that wrong.

(54:49):
Like so Collise, I.

Speaker 1 (54:51):
Do like when they go, oh, I get to the
front counter and I'm buying something, she goes, oh, I
love this. Oh my god, I got one of these too.
I got this in like every color. I kind of
feel validated and that will make me maybe keep it
more because I think it's like a hot item. She's like,
oh my god, we were almost out of these or something,
you know, like you create a need. But overall, I

(55:11):
really I don't want to talk to anyone in the store,
and I'm really sorry to everyone who works in stores,
and that's like your fucking job, and like if you
don't do it, you get reprimanded by management, Like you
can't not ask me if I want to start a room.
But I don't ever want to start a room. I
always want to try everything at home. I've said this before.
I do think it's a trick that they have bad

(55:32):
lighting in those stores, because it discourages you from trying
it on in stores, like a little room where you
can't even get it far enough away from the mirror
that you feel good about your body, like you're like
right up close next to it, like I can't know what.
Do you shop at stores? Ever? I? Yes, I do.

Speaker 4 (55:48):
And because I live in a very small area, I
always go to the same stores. And there's one store
in particular that I love going to, and there's this
sales association. She's really really sweet, very nice, does the
same thing. Can I help you find something? No, I'm good,
thank you. And then I'll be looking at something to
be like, oh that would be cute on you. Can
I start a fitting room? All that right? And then yeah,

(56:10):
of course because I played into it and I talk
to her now every time I go there, she has
this conversation.

Speaker 1 (56:15):
She looks me so like deeply in the eyes and all.

Speaker 3 (56:17):
Like with me.

Speaker 1 (56:19):
Oh yeah yeah, And.

Speaker 4 (56:21):
It's like every time I go there, I love the store.
But every time I go there, I was like, Okay,
she's not working today, so I could just get things done.

Speaker 1 (56:28):
God, I know, because that's the other thing is when
you touch an item and then they're right behind you
and they fix it. You've unfolded an item, and then
I try to fold it back and I almost make
it look perfect, and then they fix it after me.
Like I I can't. I want to.

Speaker 2 (56:45):
I just want to leave.

Speaker 1 (56:46):
Although let me, just like completely negate everything I just said.
Are you ready? Yesterday I was shopping for like new
yoga pants or something, final thought.

Speaker 3 (56:57):
And you're like, first down does make sense?

Speaker 1 (57:00):
No, it still doesn't. It never will. And I'm honestly
pissed off that no one goes Nikki.

Speaker 2 (57:05):
That's actually an interesting question.

Speaker 1 (57:07):
That's all I want is people to go that Actually
is weird that they name the steps to the thing
the same thing as the thing that's interesting, and calling
a ladder a wrung when each of the rungs are
called rungs. That's what it is, like, Like, Okay, I
want to get up to that tree. Okay, so you're
gonna do first tree, then second tree, then third tree,

(57:27):
and then you're gonna get up to the tree. What
what excuse me? I'm first tree again, and then you're
gonna start over and then we're gonna start at first
tree again and then yeah, it's it's nuts. This takes me.
This is completely the other side of the coin. But

(57:48):
Chris and I were talking about I was like lamenting
about I was trying to buy some ath leisure and
I'm like, God, should I try this brand? And he goes,
why don't you Have you ever tried Alo? And I said, Chris,
that's very interesting. I will never buy clothing from Alo
ever intentionally. I mean, if they give me something after

(58:10):
this speech, I will. But and I'm saying this as
a white woman who has never really felt this way
before in my life, and I just want to make
that very clear that I'm talking from a place of
like I felt like I was ignored and treated as
less then, and it's probably me appropriating something in some
way I don't even know. Let me just scratch that

(58:32):
not you can leave it in, but scratch it. You
know from your memories that you just heard it. You
get what I'm saying. I went to an Alo yoga
in Beverly Hills and I was dressed a little scrubby,
but that's fine, and no one talked to me, and
I was no one was talking to me, and I
saw them talking to other people asking for help, and
I was like, oh God, when is this gonna happen?
I don't want it to happen. No one. Then I

(58:53):
was like, let me just see how long I can
stay here and see if anyone asks if I want
help for anything, because it seems to be happening all
over the place for these girls with rock and bods,
and like, I don't have a horrible bod, but at
this point I was not like fit and I looked
a little scrubby, like maybe I couldn't afford stuff in
there or something, or just like not cool enough to
wear it. No one helped me, and I was in

(59:15):
there for like twenty minutes trying, like just kind of
looking around, giving off the vibe if I need help,
and I got I go. That really was shitty, and
I didn't like how I felt in there, And I'm
sure that's how a lot of people feel going places
because of other things they can't control about themselves. I
don't know what it was. Maybe I had on a
cloak of invisibility that day, which was like a dirty
tailor swift sweatshirt or something, and they're like, she can't

(59:36):
possibly afford alo yoga even though it's not that expensive.
And then but that's not it. Then I went to
another one months later, even though I was like, I
didn't like that experience, went to another one, same thing happened.
No one helps me and they were helping everyone else.
So I refused to ever buy from them. Again, because
I felt like somehow like every girl in there just

(59:59):
like thought I would like so gross, like she doesn't
deserve to wear our clothes. And I want to also
say this about like Rachel and I was talking to
the girls chat about this, but like, why is it
that when you walk into a place to buy a
clothes and it's like, let's just say, like Artesia or like,

(01:00:21):
I guess, like an alo yoga or I'm trying to
think of like not even not Zara, but like a
place that's like maybe even anthropology. I don't know if
it's anthro but like coach, like yeah, Lululemon, No, not
even Nordstrom because they're so friendly, But why is it
that I think they're cooler than me and I think

(01:00:42):
they're kind of mean girling me, and I desperately want
to win over their approval, and I feel like I
have to buy things in order to convince them that
I deserve to shop there. I know this is my
own insecurity and I should just not care what people think.

Speaker 2 (01:00:55):
Easier said than done.

Speaker 1 (01:00:56):
But I really look at the root of it, and
I'm like, there's no I'm throwing no shade because I
think retail is a great profession and one that's really difficult,
and one that I would I was always scared to
do because I just didn't feel like I was cool
enough to do it, like even in high school or college.
Like I was like, I don't dress well enough to
have that job, and I don't carry myself well enough.
I'm not like put together enough. I'm a stained person.

(01:01:19):
But these people I treat like they are in a
win tour, you know, Like I act like they are
so much better than me, and I want to impress them.
And I feel like even bad being in their shop.
It's not their shop. They're making maybe a little above
minimum wage, and I'm acting like they are richer than me,
like not that that's like there's a status to.

Speaker 3 (01:01:41):
Their well because they're young and hot and so they
automatically are the gatekeepers.

Speaker 1 (01:01:47):
Yeah, I guess that's it. I guess there was not
really much to explore hair except that they're young and hot.

Speaker 2 (01:01:52):
You're so right, and I do.

Speaker 1 (01:01:54):
Actually, if I quit comedy and was like, you know what,
I just want to get a regular job, I would
still never do retail, not be because it's like hard
work and stuff. Because I don't think I'm cute enough
to do it, and so that is a thing that
I I do.

Speaker 3 (01:02:08):
Work you an auto parts store or like an r E. I, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:02:14):
No riture, but I.

Speaker 3 (01:02:19):
Want this stuff.

Speaker 1 (01:02:20):
I feel way stupid. I feel way better working at
an ri I and faking being into nature than I
would at working at a Bloomy's yeah, or like a
oh my god, working at a sex I would be
how because you have to dress like you shop there,

(01:02:41):
but you make a wage that makes it so you
can't even with your discount.

Speaker 2 (01:02:46):
I think most of the time.

Speaker 1 (01:02:47):
I mean, I think these women that work at sex
at least the one I go to make, there's no
way they're like that's their only income. There's just no way.
They have to have husbands or something like doing something.
It's just it's how do you work those high end
stores and dress it. I don't know, maybe there's answers
out there, but I just the other day I was
like the intimidation I feel shopping and going in places
where girls are dressed cute, and it's places I want

(01:03:09):
to shop from, But I'm too intimidated by it. Like
even though even those things where you like hire like
a stitch fix, you like hire a stylist to like
put together a box, are you. Yeah, I was like
at times too embarrassed to even get one of those
because I didn't want them to see like what they're
dealing with. Because I have such shame and insecurity about
how I dress. Yeah, it's such a weird thing and

(01:03:30):
that I can't let go of. Like I just even
though I've learned a lot of stuff to figure out
how to be cute, I still at the end of
the day always grab the grubbiest. I have nice things
in my closet, I'll never wear them because I feel
somehow not deserved age. You're killing it. Yeah, on stage,
I rent things.

Speaker 2 (01:03:49):
I rent rent the rut.

Speaker 3 (01:03:51):
Way strange because in the public eye on stage you're
like a fashion icon. Yeah, you wear on during your special?

Speaker 1 (01:04:00):
Sure? Oh, because I have a stylists, yeah, telling me
exactly what to wear, and I trust them literally blindly.
There is I mean sometimes I go, I don't know,
I'm not comfortable in this, and that's like the most
all way in But I can take literally zero credit
for that. They'll be like Nikki the Emmy's is coming
up this weekend. I gotta text some of them last week.

(01:04:20):
So what are you thinking for the Emmys? I go,
I literally whatever you think. I had no direction, no color,
no shape, no style. I go, I want I just
want the shoes to be like, not bear traps for
my feet, so I can kind of walk, but actually
make them bear traps. Who cares, I'll just bring flats.
I've learned my lesson, so I don't know. I give
no direction. I guess it's nice to know when you

(01:04:43):
know what you want, and it's nice to know when
you truly don't know and it doesn't matter. And it
reminds me of my mom shopping for back to school
clothes all through my childhood, and my mom's screaming at
me and famous bar going you don't even know what
you like and be being like I don't. But for
some reason, my mom's tone insinuated that that made me
a flawed person, and so it is ingrained in me

(01:05:04):
that there's something wrong with me that I don't know
what I like. But I like Taylor Swift merch. Here
you go, and that's and you're about to see at
least six new shirts in a row on this podcast,
because that's all I can give you. And then I
will say that if I ever get a compliment on
something from someone who I think is stylish aka Serlena,
I will buy that thing for the ever. And that's

(01:05:26):
like the thing I'll buy. She complimented some sunglasses I
got from Amazon. I've bought thirteen pairs. I've lost twelve.
I can't stop buying them. They're seven ninety nine. I'll
try to remember to put a link in my thing,
but they're they're They're the ones I've worn on the
show that are like look like truck or sunglasses like
aviator type, like cover like my entire face and sea.

(01:05:48):
Lena was like, those are cute, girl, and I was like,
oh my god, they're Amazon.

Speaker 2 (01:05:51):
I was like so excited.

Speaker 1 (01:05:52):
She was like I kind of don't need them, but
she did say they were cute, and so I will
buy them forever. I just anytime a cute girl compliments anything,
I will remember it the rest of my life. So
if you are a girl up there with good style
walking around, when you compliment a girl who's a little
bit insecure, you are giving her the greatest hip you

(01:06:13):
can't even imagine. We remember it forever. Noah, pull up
from your memory a time where a girl that has
my hairstylist. What did she say? What was the shoe?
What was the thing you were wearing? And let us know.

Speaker 4 (01:06:24):
I know it's a black romper that I got from
made Well that I was just gonna wear as like
an everyday thing. And she's like, that looks so good.
Where did you get it from? I need to get one.

Speaker 1 (01:06:33):
And she has great style and you respect her and
so she never forgotten it and you will never throw
that out right, Never, girls, if you have good style
days where I look like I have good style, I'm
gonna start following my own advice and giving girls compliments
because it it fucking matters.

Speaker 2 (01:06:50):
All right.

Speaker 1 (01:06:50):
We covered a lot today. We'll be back on the
pod tomorrow. Can't wait. I think my sister will be here.
That'll be exciting. Thank you guys for joining us. We're
going to uncover a People article that came out this
week that said, uh, get to everything you want to
know about Nicki Glazer's sister, which is just next level
for all of us in the family. We can't even

(01:07:11):
believe it happened People Magazine. We'll get into that tomorrow
and much much more. Thank you for listening to the
podcast I Will See You then, uh, don't be good
bye ee. The Nicki Glazer Podcast is a production by
Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and iHeart Podcasts. Created and
hosted by me Nicki Glazer, co hosted by Brian Frangie,
Executive produced by Will Ferrell, Hans Sonny and Noah Avior.

(01:07:32):
Edited it engineered by Lean and Loaf, video production Mark Canton,
and music by Anya Marina.

Speaker 2 (01:07:39):
You can now watch

Speaker 1 (01:07:39):
Full episodes of the Nicki Glazer podcast on YouTube, follow
at Nicki Glazer Pod and subscribe to our channel