#478 Dangers Around Us, Dining Out Rules & Do Fights Make Music Better?

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
The nik Gliser podcasts.

Speaker 2 (00:10):
He's Nikki here, I am Thank you guys are podcast
Welcome Second Day in Los Angeles on the pod same
group as yesterday's show.

Speaker 1 (00:19):
Noah is in studio. What's up, Noah?

Speaker 3 (00:22):
Does Brian have anything structural to say about me?

Speaker 4 (00:25):
Yeah?

Speaker 5 (00:25):
Any other A little bit more robust than.

Speaker 1 (00:31):
Nursing. Yeah, your baby is coming, Yes to pick you up?

Speaker 2 (00:37):
Yes, there's baby driving cars now, babo. I didn't know
Waimo was the name of the self driving cars until
I saw one yesterday. I want to get one, so
I want to be in any you could do it.

Speaker 1 (00:57):
Is it a way moo app? Or is Waimo part
of Uber?

Speaker 4 (01:00):
No, it's an app, I think. Yeah. Then you just
get in and there's no driver.

Speaker 1 (01:06):
I'm so into it.

Speaker 4 (01:07):
Scared.

Speaker 2 (01:09):
No, I feel better than I don't have to talk
to anyone.

Speaker 4 (01:12):
Yeah, I think you're more likely to be murdered by
an Uber driver. YEA, can't.

Speaker 1 (01:17):
I can't anyone here been in one?

Speaker 5 (01:19):
No, I watched a YouTube video of someone being in one.

Speaker 2 (01:22):
Well, tell us all about it.

Speaker 1 (01:26):
That's so cool. Okay, so we're gonna meet your baby.
What she liked?

Speaker 2 (01:29):
What you guys are visiting? Here because Obvi's family lives here.

Speaker 1 (01:33):
Yeah, okay, shewish holiday stuff. I was flying with her easy.

Speaker 3 (01:37):
She's such a good baby. Yeah, she's She's just fun
and loving and she's kind of silly.

Speaker 1 (01:43):
God, you lucked out so lucky. Yeah, and sleeps. Yeah.
Do you feel like it's you or you feel like
you just got lucky?

Speaker 2 (01:50):
Like because when some parents have a cranky baby, do
you kind of go like they're doing it wrong and
I'm doing it right?

Speaker 1 (01:55):
Or are you kind of.

Speaker 3 (01:55):
Like it's funny that you asked that, because Kristen and
I were just talking about it, and I think it's
because we're older moms and we're like way more intuitive
with like emotions and are you know, like we're introspective
and we just like know how we affect a child.
So I think it's like being older and just kind
of like.

Speaker 2 (02:13):
Yeah, you've read The Body Keeps the Score and that
you like you've read books, like you've.

Speaker 1 (02:18):
Been around, you've seen getting to so many.

Speaker 2 (02:21):
Yeah, there's so many, but I mean you're right, Like,
think of how much knowledge about emotional knowledge you've about
how your you were raised and how it made you
who you are, that you've accrued in the past fifteen years.
That is, that is so valuable that if you just
had a kid early on, you wouldn't have known any
of it.

Speaker 3 (02:41):
Oh my god. In my twenties, I was like, so dumb.

Speaker 2 (02:43):
My mom stood by the fact that as a kid
she didn't want me. We lived on a river and
she didn't want us to go down to the river
and drown, and so she just told me, if you
go down there, you'll never see mommy and daddy ever again.
And how she even last night we were in the
car and she was like, I stand by that I
didn't want you to d and that's the only way
to make you so scared. And then famously my dad
would come home from work and be like, let's go

(03:04):
down to the river and I scream and cry. I
still hate the river because of it. But she's and
I don't really know if she's right or wrong. Like
I think I would probably use the same tactics to
make sure my kid didn't wonder in the traffic of
like you'll be run over and killed and you'll never
see me.

Speaker 4 (03:23):
Like, yeah, it's hard.

Speaker 1 (03:24):
What do you do with Sean?

Speaker 4 (03:25):
Yeah? What I am really bad at because Aaron is
not as anxious as I am. Aaron's my wife. I'm
I'm so anxious about everything that I always kind of
get too real with him where I'm like and he's like,
let me just run around outside. I'm like, there are pedophiles.
You always have to be with me? Yeah, the only

(03:48):
not pedophile in this neighborhood.

Speaker 2 (03:50):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean I think it does work.
But to what detriment?

Speaker 4 (03:55):
Yeah, Like, I honestly a seven year old should be
walking around thinking that there's pedophiles that live next door,
but so they should Also, you shouldn't have moved in
next to somebody pedip This is this is it's so
cheap delivering pedophile cove. But the fact that they have their.

Speaker 2 (04:10):
Own cove is Yeah, it makes it sound luxurious and
like a vacation spot, and it is. Yeah, a child
of the playground.

Speaker 4 (04:24):
Played wire.

Speaker 1 (04:27):
But I do think that it works.

Speaker 2 (04:30):
And I my sister, I mean, her kids were running
amok the other day in the park and she said,
I kind of like want because Forrest is too and
he's just running.

Speaker 1 (04:38):
He just wants to go in the lake.

Speaker 2 (04:39):
He wants and they're stopping him, and he the only
thing stopping him from going in the lake. Is his
parents and my sister's like, I kind of want him
to fall in the lake just so he gets he
gets scared and like learns the re questions because I'm
just blocking all these horrible things happening to him all
the time.

Speaker 1 (04:52):
How is he gonna learn?

Speaker 2 (04:53):
Like, as a parent, I think I is there part
of you that wants your kid to burn the hand
on the stove just a little.

Speaker 4 (04:58):
Bit, Yeah, like just to get a little injured, because
it does it does alert you of the danger of
figure character. Cuddle with a pedophile, but don't have sexual Yeah,
him two tugs.

Speaker 1 (05:14):
God, he gets some candy out of it. It's not
all bad.

Speaker 4 (05:19):
There was a kid in my growing up that this
is why it's like so like fresh in my brain
always is one of my friends in third grade got
molested and he he came into school and told everyone
that he got molested and like it was wild because
the teacher had to stop him. But I didn't piece

(05:39):
it together what the story was until like I was
in my twenties, because he talked about like a guy
luring him into his house and then making him watch
him pee, And I didn't realize.

Speaker 1 (05:48):
Oh it was.

Speaker 4 (05:49):
It wasn't pain.

Speaker 1 (05:51):
Yeah, we don't know. I mean that's what you would
think it was, because it's all.

Speaker 4 (05:54):
You know, all you know. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (05:57):
Oh, I have a friend that like.

Speaker 4 (05:58):
He's doing fine now, he's so like red Bull.

Speaker 2 (06:01):
Most people had something funky happened to them like that,
Like not most people, but like a big percentage of
kids have seen something weird, like had something not so
right happen. Like I have a friend who like is like, yeah,
there was like a neighbor and I think I went
over and I definitely remember like seeing a man's penis
and being like, oh, like, but she kind of is

(06:23):
just like recalling it like a loose memory that she
can't really like make sense of, and it kind of is.
I like when there's a casualness about it like that
where that it's because there needs to be that. I
think people need to talk about it casually.

Speaker 5 (06:38):
If we stop taking it so seriously, then people stop
getting so fucked up about it.

Speaker 2 (06:42):
Well that I think you're being sarcastic, But I don't
think you're wrong though, Like I do think that part,
and I've said this before, the reason that everyone is
so awkward about it, like no if you said you
were molested at a dinner party, it would like make
everyone would be like that was really uncomfortable. Why it's
it's it's weird, but like someone can talk about like

(07:05):
oh yeah I was in a car accident when I
was four, and no one goes that made it really weird.

Speaker 1 (07:09):
But it is the same, Well fuck.

Speaker 5 (07:10):
Those people if you're if you're revealing that you were
molested at a dinner I guess what.

Speaker 1 (07:14):
I mean, Like it it is weird because it's not.
It's not.

Speaker 2 (07:17):
It's not the tone with which we lead our lives
in America, Like we don't talk about but we should.

Speaker 1 (07:22):
We should be able to bring it up just as
as so.

Speaker 5 (07:24):
You want there, you want it to be like yeah
I was molested when I was a kid, and the
people just go, oh how was that for you?

Speaker 1 (07:28):
No, it's just like oh that sucks. Fuck what happened?
How did you deal with it?

Speaker 2 (07:32):
Like we should all be talking about it because when
you can't, there seems to be if you can't talk
about something publicly, it's shameful.

Speaker 4 (07:38):
Yeah, there's a barrier that's put up, so like yeah,
like it means shame because it is awkward to bring
it up at dinner. But it's also just because society
has told you that it's awkward to.

Speaker 2 (07:47):
Be like, no, why is it not awkward to be like,
my dad spanked us, and and that's a little awkward,
but not very It's the same thing.

Speaker 5 (07:53):
It's like even if there was no shame involved in
the reaction. I do feel like it's a little inappropriate
to just blurt out your trauma blurted out.

Speaker 2 (08:00):
But I like, within the context of a conversation to
be like, actually, I was.

Speaker 5 (08:04):
Okay, So they were already talking, we're getting we're molesting adjacent,
and then someone just chimes in, yeah, like or.

Speaker 2 (08:09):
Like abuse adjacent, or like trauma as a child adjacent conversation, yeah,
or saying, you know, you're rosen thorn of the Year
going around Thanksgiving.

Speaker 4 (08:20):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (08:20):
I think it should just be more colloquial.

Speaker 5 (08:23):
Rose is I went to Boston, my thorn is I
was molested.

Speaker 2 (08:26):
Yeah, yeah, I like I love when people are so
just frank about it, because it just same with like Frank.

Speaker 1 (08:32):
Did, usually a guy named Frank did.

Speaker 2 (08:34):
You're right, but you like, I remember the first time
people were like kind of really just casual about talking
about the Anna herpes like I remember some comedians that
Joe List comes to mind, Andy.

Speaker 4 (08:46):
Haynes, There's so many.

Speaker 1 (08:48):
No andians was molested. Sorry and does not.

Speaker 4 (08:51):
Have you talk about it on stage.

Speaker 1 (08:56):
But Andans was the.

Speaker 2 (08:57):
First person I'd ever heard talk about being molested. And
it wasn't like we had to pry it out of him,
or it wasn't this like a podcast centered on it.
He just like mentioned it on our podcast in twenty ten,
and I was like, that's the coolest shit I've.

Speaker 4 (09:07):
Ever it was. It was just part of it. He
was like, I liked to ski and I got molested.

Speaker 1 (09:13):
I will never forget.

Speaker 2 (09:14):
It really made an impact on me how cool it
was that he was able to like talk about it,
not casually but kind of. And then I remember Joe
List saying he had herpes, like herpes was the molestation of.

Speaker 5 (09:25):
Herpes STD growing up.

Speaker 4 (09:26):
He was very shameful.

Speaker 2 (09:27):
Yet it still has that to it, and it's so
it really makes a difference when comedians talk about it
and joke about it casually for everyone who might have
it happen to them. Because herpes is the same way
as being molested. No one wants it chooses to get it.

Speaker 4 (09:42):
It was all just one awkward night.

Speaker 2 (09:46):
Yes, but it's just I think that's really There was
always a part of me that like, if I got
herpes'll I promise I'll talk about it as soon as
I get it, so everyone will.

Speaker 1 (09:55):
Know when I get it. I mean, I don't plan
on getting it. Chris doesn't have it and I don't
have it yet.

Speaker 5 (09:59):
Well, there is that parenting style of if your child
is running and then they fall and they scrape their
knee or something, some parents will.

Speaker 4 (10:05):
Go like, oh my god, are you okay?

Speaker 5 (10:07):
Yes, but it's better to just go like, all right,
you fell, not a big deal.

Speaker 1 (10:11):
That's interesting too because there's these instagrams.

Speaker 2 (10:13):
Did you see the one of like they they fake
bonk the kid's head, they like hit, they bang on
the wall and then they go oh no to the baby,
and the baby goes doesn't feel anything because its head
wasn't hit, or just the hand hit the parent's hand,
and then the baby just kind of looks to the
wall and goes ah and starts crying immediately, And so
it shows you the reaction of the parent causes the
kid react. But then I think about how I was

(10:35):
treated as a kid when I would cry about things
like socks being itchy or something I like, I didn't
like like autistic things that would like cause me a
lot of anxiety. And then my parents would have that
like that's not a big deal kind of thing and
it is really damaged.

Speaker 3 (10:50):
Then that's dismissive.

Speaker 1 (10:52):
Yes, So what do you do? What's what's what's the
way to do it?

Speaker 2 (10:54):
Like it's not a big deal that you fell, like
you fell, like you get excited about it, like, oh fell,
Oh that's sad.

Speaker 3 (11:01):
But if you just like ask like, oh, how do
you feel right now? And then they say, oh, my
knee hurts, Okay, you know that pain will go away.
Just acknowledging it, not dismissing it, yes, but also like
letting them know that it's gonna be okay, Yeah that's good.

Speaker 5 (11:16):
Great if my kid falls, I'm gonna fall too. And
then I'll say every time you fall, eye fall, No, it's.

Speaker 4 (11:25):
I keep going.

Speaker 1 (11:25):
You will never see that.

Speaker 4 (11:28):
It is like you're just trying not to give them
complexes about all this. They're gonna get here, they're gonna
get complexes from something, but like you, like in terms
of pain and like actually talking about feelings it's so
helpful to about it because like my son will have
temper tantrums and we got to a point now where
he will be like, don't talk to me, I'm in

(11:48):
a tantrum, and like we're like, oh, perfect, this is great,
Like we.

Speaker 1 (11:53):
They're going to be so much better.

Speaker 4 (11:54):
Yeah, like he's it's so healthy healthy.

Speaker 2 (11:58):
I mean, Chapel Roone is an example of you know
someone who like is that next generation who's really tapped
into like how she's feeling in boundaries. Yes that we
don't as we don't understand or recognize, and we're like
almost insulted by it, Like.

Speaker 4 (12:13):
You didn't know you could do that, Like Britney Spears
didn't know she could set boundaries and now she's like
knife dancing on Instagram.

Speaker 2 (12:23):
So true, But I would even say that she probably
couldn't have set boundaries with the people that were around her.

Speaker 6 (12:32):
She monsters, Yeah, what father, her milf mother? Yeah, well
Chapel Road, what are her boundaries? She's just like, fans
need to chill the fuck out. And I don't owe
you anything. I don't owe you a picture. I don't
care if I've changed your life.

Speaker 2 (12:44):
You don't need to stop me at Walmart and like
tell me like like or wherever, Like I don't want
I don't want to touch you, like, don't assault me,
don't touch me.

Speaker 4 (12:52):
Yeah, they were like showing up at her parents house
or fans. It's like and like asking to take pictures
with them, and she's like this is private.

Speaker 2 (12:59):
Like yeah, here's my new thing about a boundary. If
I have my dog with me, who is one of
the cutest dogs that's ever lived, it's it really is true.
I don't care that you're a dog person and that
you need to stop and pet her. I don't That
doesn't interest me. It's everyone's a dog person. They're the
cutest animal that's ever lived. That's why we domesticated them

(13:19):
over thousands of years so that they could hang.

Speaker 1 (13:21):
Out with us more. It's I don't care, but there's
some women. Sorry women, Oh.

Speaker 2 (13:26):
Shit, that just go Sorry, Can I put her? I'm
a dog person, I'm a dog lover.

Speaker 4 (13:32):
Cool being like, oh I love iPhones? Can I Yeah?

Speaker 2 (13:38):
It's so true, and like my dog has never been
eager to be pet by a stranger.

Speaker 1 (13:43):
She's always like.

Speaker 2 (13:43):
This shaking kind of why continue to pet and try?
Like just get away, don't pet people's dog.

Speaker 7 (13:50):
I have to have a conversation where they're looking up
and you're looking down because you have a little dog too. Yes,
which makes it even more frustrating because now you're.

Speaker 2 (13:57):
In and I'm going somewhere too usually and they are
stopping me. It's I I'm sorry. If you're this person,
I'm sorry.

Speaker 1 (14:05):
Listen.

Speaker 2 (14:06):
I've pet dogs before when they look like they're eager
to be pet I've never once gone up to a
dog that isn't like dying for me to pet it
and said to the owner like, can I pet her?

Speaker 1 (14:15):
Ever, I've never asked, because you shouldn't have to.

Speaker 5 (14:17):
Yeah, if the dog comes up to you, you should pet And.

Speaker 2 (14:19):
Then I asked, can I pet her? Even if she
comes up to me and wants to pet me? I
always ask, but like, don't just approach people because you
are so special and you're so different than their people.

Speaker 1 (14:28):
I love dogs. Everyone does. If you come up to
me and I'm a raccoon girl.

Speaker 2 (14:34):
Like, then I'll be like, that's interesting, that's something new.

Speaker 4 (14:37):
I'm a raccoon girl. Could you feed me?

Speaker 2 (14:41):
I just I'm burdened by it, and I always let
people like little kids. I will because I want to
teach little kids empathy about animals, and like little kids
are a lot of times scared of dogs. So I'll
all approach kids and be like, do you want to
pet her? But adults, I'm not interested in your fascination
with dogs and that you like them.

Speaker 5 (14:57):
I have a reverse, Yeah, don't let your kids run
up to me a stranger kid or run up to
Like I'm eating dinner and there's a kid at the
in the restaurant, and then the kid they just let
the kid just roam free and then run up to
my table and be like, oh, look what Johnny's doing.
And it's like, I don't want to babysit your kid
right now.

Speaker 4 (15:17):
I agree with you. We have we have very strict
restaurant roles. We don't do screens at restaurants because we
we want him to be normal because restaurants are a
part of life. So like knowing to eat your meal
while you're there and engage in conversations so important, and
not running around to Brian eating. Yes, even though he's

(15:38):
so inviting to children.

Speaker 7 (15:40):
It is the parents do that. They they'll they'll do
a play by play of what the kid is doing. Yeah, oh,
there's Johnny running again, and it's like it's so performative
and loud that it's actually more annoying than what the
kid is.

Speaker 4 (15:54):
Actually, there was.

Speaker 5 (15:55):
One time I had I was in a veil. This
is like a rich person's area, okay, And so I
think rich people feel like their kid can do whatever
they want, whenever they want, and.

Speaker 1 (16:05):
Because they can't.

Speaker 5 (16:07):
Probably, So I was at the restaurant and Jack was there,
my dog, and this little kid was running him. I
was like, what if my dog bites the kid or
what like, then then my dog's in trouble because you
let your kid run up to me.

Speaker 4 (16:18):
Yes, And so.

Speaker 5 (16:19):
Ali had to like arm bar this child and like
push him back without hurting him, because you know, it's
just like it's like crazy people.

Speaker 1 (16:27):
Jack is a very cute dog, doude. Do you have
people coming up all the time to do.

Speaker 5 (16:30):
Much less so now because he's he's clearly old. Right,
People love people.

Speaker 4 (16:37):
You want to be clear.

Speaker 2 (16:37):
If you're listening and you're like Nikki such a bit
about her dog. I don't mind when people are like,
your dog is so cute, like love that, but you.

Speaker 1 (16:44):
Don't need to touch her. I just it's like Hey,
it's like a pregnant but belly.

Speaker 3 (16:48):
That's true. But I literally did what you're saying this
morning at the coffee shop, and I feel the urge
to tell you.

Speaker 2 (16:53):
Okay, okay, walk me through it, and like do you
think But I'm sure you're not an idiot knowing there's
away this person didn't want you to touch.

Speaker 3 (17:01):
I never touch anyone's dog unless they make the owner
makes eye contact with me and they see that I'm
just like fawning at their dog with my eyes and
I say, is it okay to pet your dogs?

Speaker 4 (17:15):
Talking about going.

Speaker 1 (17:16):
Ask as they are petting.

Speaker 5 (17:17):
Yeah, but you're not even asking, and you're going, I'm
so sorry, but I'm a dog person and I therefore
I have.

Speaker 4 (17:23):
The right to do the shop. Nick, You're like kind
of talking about the people on the street or like yes,
you're in movement and they're like running across traffic, being like,
I'm a dog person, I really need to touch dogs.

Speaker 1 (17:35):
I had an ugly dog.

Speaker 5 (17:37):
She wasn't so fucking she was driving down the street
and ghost riding her car.

Speaker 7 (17:44):
You need like a greyhound or like something like you
intimidating dog.

Speaker 4 (17:48):
That's the problem.

Speaker 7 (17:49):
Ugly, ugly dog really really skinny dogs no one wants
I know.

Speaker 2 (17:54):
Yeah, or cat, Yeah, people don't.

Speaker 5 (17:59):
Well, people know that cat will potentially bite or scratch. Yeah, yeah,
whereas that only happened with a dog five percent of
the time.

Speaker 1 (18:05):
That's a good point.

Speaker 4 (18:06):
Are they using the dog to talk to you?

Speaker 2 (18:08):
No, no, no, no, it's it isn't that. It isn't like
a I'm recognized and they're trying to get through to me.

Speaker 4 (18:15):
No, you were just you were a dog walker in
New York. You had to have encountered them because I
was a dog walker in New York. Yeah, I was
a dog walker in New York.

Speaker 5 (18:22):
Also, wait, what, it's.

Speaker 4 (18:25):
The only way for it's the only control. It's the
only way white men with dreams can get a job
in New York apartment.

Speaker 2 (18:36):
So they trust babysitting for men because for me, I
baby set children because I'm a woman and they trusted me.
It's an easier job to get as a woman. But
as it's the babysitting for guys, Yeah, because it's less
you're not going to fuck the dog.

Speaker 4 (18:50):
Yeah, there's a chance of.

Speaker 7 (18:55):
Es and they do have pretty nice like yeah they
got a baby. Yeah, yeah, I actually had to take
care of a great Dane who was going through her
period for the first time, and I had.

Speaker 4 (19:05):
To be there for her. You have to do the talk.

Speaker 7 (19:07):
Yeah yeah, yeah, I got her. I got her going
after Yeah. It was insane.

Speaker 4 (19:12):
It was so much.

Speaker 7 (19:14):
It was the most like, well that's why Vagina I
ever like encountered was from a dog.

Speaker 2 (19:19):
Like it was like flopping out. Yeah, because she was
on the Oh I didn't know it comes out.

Speaker 4 (19:23):
Oh yeah, it's like like it blooms like a road.
Yeah yeah, like a blooming onion. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (19:29):
Yeah, I got a cactus flower in the middle of
the night.

Speaker 4 (19:31):
I felt like I was on Bachelor. Yeah. I was like, oh,
look at me.

Speaker 2 (19:35):
Well, when Goldie my dog was getting spade or nud
or whatever it does with the female dog, I was
asking the rescue because they were like, you need to
get her spade right away, and I'm like, but we're
not going to have her around. Dogs are going to
fuck her, like we really need this, and then everyone
was like yes because of periods. I'm like, oh, yeah,
that makes sense.

Speaker 7 (19:53):
Okay, I want to now imagine a great Dane. It
was like one pounds no thanks, Yeah, so intense, all right.

Speaker 4 (20:01):
But a great day in like period a periods like
as much as like a Pratt freshman New York. I'm
just New York like Brat summer.

Speaker 2 (20:15):
Oh yeah, we'll be back after that. Speaking of Pratt Brat,
I was thinking of Bowen Yang this weekend on SNL
doing the Charlie XCX sketch, which he's so funny.

Speaker 1 (20:33):
I love him so much. Is like the m v
P of SNL.

Speaker 4 (20:37):
I mean truly. Yeah, now he's now in everything.

Speaker 2 (20:41):
His Speaking of Chapel Roone, he did the Moodang.

Speaker 1 (20:45):
Moo Dang hippo.

Speaker 4 (20:46):
A lot of lot of bad feedback from I think
people were misunderstanding.

Speaker 2 (20:51):
I agree, Yeah, I thought I when I watched it,
I go, oh, this is going to be misunderstood, like
as we're making fun of Chapel Roone. But it was like, no,
it was it was so I thought that was a
really really good bit.

Speaker 1 (21:02):
And then our.

Speaker 2 (21:04):
Buddy who has been on the show before, one of
my best friends ever, Emil Joaquim, new cast member of SNL.
I have never been this. I don't know, I've never
been this proud of anyone in my life. There's something
about it that I'm like, I feel like he's like
my brother or something like I am Like I even

(21:24):
text him the day of I was like, I am
compelled to get your will.

Speaker 1 (21:27):
You send me your mom and dad's numbers?

Speaker 2 (21:30):
Because I need to celebrate with someone who loves you
as much as I do. Like I'm like, I am
so excited, Like it just felt. It's so it's so
crazy that this guy that Andrew and I met, who
picked us up from the airport in Bloomington, Indiana, at
Indianapolis Airport to drive to Bloomington, was working the door.
I think like it was like just like an hour
and he picked us up in two thousand and eighteen,

(21:53):
it must have been eighteen or nineteen and did a
guest set on the show.

Speaker 1 (21:57):
Is now a cast member on SNL.

Speaker 4 (21:59):
It's just cooled.

Speaker 1 (22:00):
Seems someone like.

Speaker 5 (22:02):
It was in the improv group that I started. That's right,
many years after I started it.

Speaker 1 (22:08):
He's gonna be so famous.

Speaker 4 (22:09):
It's crazy because I've known him for five days.

Speaker 1 (22:12):
I only know him from when we were in Lake City.

Speaker 4 (22:16):
Yeah, like I did two weekends with him. I love
He's so sweet. But seeing him on screen and knowing
that like Marcello Hernandez is dating Kai Kya Gerber. Now,
I'm like, I didn't know that. I'm like, Emil is
about Like it's gonna be like Sydney Sweet.

Speaker 1 (22:32):
To see Whomeil ends up dating. I call it like
as well, like he's the next Pete Davidson.

Speaker 4 (22:38):
It's it's gonna be it's gonna be absurd. You're gonna
see him in like on the cover of US and
he's gonna be like I did Andy McDowell.

Speaker 1 (22:44):
Now, oh my god, you're so right.

Speaker 2 (22:48):
It's it's He was in three things I think, including
just like just even the intro, like Emil walk Like
that was awesome.

Speaker 7 (22:58):
It's cool with those things too, because you're gonna back
at the history and be like this was the first
way he just held the gun. And then he's gonna
get his first like thing a weekend update, and you're
gonna like get.

Speaker 2 (23:07):
Some great moments though that he was on screen for
a couple of seconds, Like there was some funny stuff
that he did.

Speaker 4 (23:12):
Yeah, made the most of That's the key to being
a feature on SNL is just making the most of
like your one line or your one appearance, and he did.

Speaker 1 (23:21):
Yeah, it was really good.

Speaker 2 (23:22):
It was a perfect for showing and then seeing him
in the Good Nights at the end and Dana. He
said that Dana like was like you get up here,
Like Dana knew he was a new cast member. Dana
Carvey and like pulled him up and he was like
laughing and joking in between Dana Carving and Jelly Roll
just having the best time. Like the smile on his
face was so like I just debuted on SNL. He's

(23:42):
gonna He's going down in history. It's like being a
president is being a cast member. It's like it is it.
It's crazy.

Speaker 4 (23:49):
It's crazy. It's like being part of like comedy Skull
and Bones, like when you you're part of the same
institution as George W. Bush and Thomas Jefferson.

Speaker 2 (23:58):
I mean, and I've never had a friend make it
onto essen. I've had, you know, Amy, I remember when
she hosted S and L. That was a huge deal.
But like being on the cast of US and L, like,
for some reason, I never really had I wasn't in
sketch comedy.

Speaker 1 (24:11):
So did you have friends that made it onto that? I?

Speaker 4 (24:13):
Like no, I just like knew, like I guess like Chay,
I like used to hang out with cha along did
ok yeah, like and I'm so happy for like Jay,
like but like yeah, man, like not like somebody who
is like my ride or die.

Speaker 5 (24:28):
Like the only friend that I had that that was
ever it was Eddie Murphy's.

Speaker 2 (24:35):
Yeah, it's just awesome, and congratulations to a Meal and
to his whole family and like, and he definitely was
someone that when he told his dad he was going
to go into stand up comedy, like his dad cried
because his dad's a doctor. His mom, I think, is
also a doctor, and so his family was like kind
of devastated that this. Yeah, and and they're all just
like so it's they have the cutest family.

Speaker 1 (24:56):
I just love them so much.

Speaker 2 (24:57):
And he it was I was like I didn't want
to bother him, like the day of, but he was
like texting with me and felt so nice that I
was like, oh, you know what, because I think sometimes
when your friends like start to become super famous, no
matter how well you're doing, you like worry. Like I've
had friends before like not as soon as I'm starting

(25:19):
to get things, they kind of pull away or they
get like a little bit jealous or mad or whatever,
because you feel like they think they're gonna lose you.

Speaker 1 (25:25):
Is essentially what it is.

Speaker 2 (25:26):
They're not Some of it might be like jealousy that
you got this thing and I didn't, but it really
is about like you won't probably.

Speaker 1 (25:32):
Talk to me anymore once you get famous.

Speaker 2 (25:34):
And I think I had Initially with a Meal, there
was a feeling of like I'm losing my friend, like
he's gonna enter I'm not even in the SNL cool
girl world that like cool kid club yet. And but
then I just just interacting with him this week and
sharing about his experience, I'm like, Oh, there's no way
I'm gonna lose this guy.

Speaker 1 (25:52):
Like he's just he's a good guy that's always gonna
be ease ground it. Yeah, he's away so young.

Speaker 4 (25:57):
That's so nice to hear. Just I actually forgot that
I was very good friends with Brooks. I forgot that
he was honest. And now he stopped like responding because
he was like, he's like, sorry, I had to go
to David Busters with Bobby morn I had, And I'm like,
it's so weird that you know Bobby Mornehan, like Mornhead's

(26:19):
been on TV for like seven years and you're just
like the biggest dipshit I know.

Speaker 2 (26:25):
Yeah, it's like that is I think more than anything
when I when my friends get things and I have
a reaction that is, you know, I won't like say
it out loud, but there's like a part of me
that's like they didn't get that.

Speaker 1 (26:38):
Thing, and it's like a bad feeling.

Speaker 2 (26:40):
It's just that I don't I just want them to
still be friends with me, and I think they won't
if they get too cool, because I lost friends in
high school to the cool kid, to the snl of
high school, you know, the coolest table in the cafeteria,
and and I think that you're just I'm scared of
that happening again.

Speaker 5 (26:55):
Well, I have that feeling about people who aren't my
friends who get things want their lives to be.

Speaker 4 (27:00):
I have enemies in my head that like they're like
I clearly don't think about you at all, but I'm like,
I want you to fail.

Speaker 2 (27:07):
Yeah, and that's when you watched only four minutes of
their special.

Speaker 1 (27:12):
To Netflix that this.

Speaker 2 (27:14):
Is not okay, and that this person was mean to
you once when they didn't mean to be and you
took it the wrong way, but they were just had
a cold.

Speaker 4 (27:21):
Yeah, there's an there's an insanely famous person that I'll
talk about off air because it has become too online
because I've mentioned in the podcast he's so famous and
he was my friend and he fucked my girlfriend in
New York and I can't I can't get over I

(27:42):
can't get over it. Famous, you too fucked her while
you were dating? Yes, your friends. And I hate his
guts to the point where like, but there was like
a time in LA has.

Speaker 1 (27:53):
His star diminished at all? Have there been? Like because
it can't stay?

Speaker 4 (27:56):
How did you find out? I was Everyone told me
Swift fucked your girlfriend. I mean, like honestly, if you're
actually like putting the top like top twenty most famous people,
he's definitely in that list.

Speaker 1 (28:14):
Or maybe you told me, but I forget.

Speaker 4 (28:16):
Including like political leaders. Oh no, I'm talking this strictly
pop culture. But like if you just he's such a
multi hyphen it that you would know. And there was
a time, I know, there was a time where every
billboard in l A was him.

Speaker 1 (28:32):
I think Dad el Malay.

Speaker 4 (28:39):
Really like I'm like, what is.

Speaker 2 (28:40):
He gonna get Madden me Like like oh really I
did not know that?

Speaker 4 (28:45):
Yeah, oh my god. And I can't watch Atlanta.

Speaker 2 (28:47):
Like so talented That's why I don't like to get
to know celebrities, because you learn something shitty about them
and then you can't enjoy anything they make.

Speaker 4 (28:57):
It sucks to have this like hip on my shoulder,
and like I just constantly read where they're like he's
a genius and it's like almost like Albert Einstein fucked
my girlfriend.

Speaker 7 (29:09):
But here's the thing, though, no matter how talented he
is in the bedroom, I heard he's even better.

Speaker 4 (29:14):
So that's so you got that going for you. Yeah, yeah,
that sucks.

Speaker 7 (29:21):
How many times did he think it was? It like
a you know, I didn't get those deep outs. I
always wonder if it's like because if it's one night,
I wouldn't hate him as much if it was like you.

Speaker 4 (29:31):
Know, I think it was just like a thing that
we were like friendly with each other and like also, yeah,
a month before it, like we hosted like this the
election night at two thousand and eight, like together wow
at Sound Fix, and I was just like, this guy's
like my friend, and then it turns out he's also
but also you were dating Jane Sean. Yeah, I think

(29:51):
it was while we were dating. He's been around your wife.

Speaker 5 (29:53):
Yeah, it was your girlfriend cheated on you with Donald Glover.

Speaker 2 (29:57):
He's apologized so much, right, you know, I've only seen
him twice since then, and he acted as if he
only slightly remembered me.

Speaker 4 (30:06):
Oh my, yeah. I mean he's probably playing so much
that she was a batch.

Speaker 3 (30:12):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (30:12):
Yeah, I was talking to you know, the person I
was playing poker with, the other not playing but watching
play poker. I was talking to them about having success
and how it feels so good when you see people
who are shitty to you and you get to now
like have some power over them and like possibly sure
destroy them, yeah, like impact their career negatively and there.
And I've talked about it on the podcast before. There
was a girl that was so rude to me on

(30:33):
a show I did one time, and I almost want,
I don't really want to host a late night show,
but I just know she would end up being booked
on it at some point if I did have one.
And I you know, like you probably aren't aware of
everyone being booked on your show, so you probably show
up to work and just see the breakdown, be like, oh,
she's performing tonight, and go tell her to pack up
and leave. Yeah, like just but her crew's already here,

(30:54):
we've already done the sound the rehearsal and the sound check.
Just tell her she has to go, and just don't
don't even tell her why. But she's not performing on
my show. I'm not giving her platform and like to
have her just be like why and like maybe be
able to just give her a note of like, you
know this game show, think back to it when you
were when you thought.

Speaker 1 (31:12):
You were better than me. Yeah, and it's and I.

Speaker 2 (31:14):
And my friend goes, no, that's not what you do.
You have her on and you just like make even give.

Speaker 1 (31:23):
I don't know, I don't want to. I go, it's
better to not.

Speaker 7 (31:26):
You've let's enjoy Behar's mature. There's a video of Michael B. Jordan, right, yeah,
and this girl's interviewing the Red carpet. She made it
to the Red carpet and then she's like we went
we were in grade school together, and he just looks
at her.

Speaker 4 (31:42):
He's like, yeah, you bullied me. You were actually like
and like made her feel horrible. Michael Jordan's people. Yeah, yeah,
but no, it's like yeah, it was just like that's great.
It was like so vengeance, it's nothing better. Yeah, vengeance.
Michael b Jordan, He's like, as he's so good.

Speaker 5 (32:04):
Luck, well no in the why or he was a
skinny little kid.

Speaker 4 (32:07):
Yeah, but he still had it.

Speaker 1 (32:08):
I love vengeance. I love.

Speaker 2 (32:12):
It's something I shouldn't and I don't think about it
that often, but that would be I almost would do
something just like that. I wouldn't want to do a show,
but I would do it if I could impact negatively
someone's life that thought they were better than me at
one point.

Speaker 5 (32:26):
You're I don't think you're capable of vengeance.

Speaker 4 (32:28):
Really, I don't really want to harm you. Forgive you easily.

Speaker 1 (32:31):
Turns into harm in there and in their staff's lives.

Speaker 5 (32:36):
Sure, well you are good people there, and why you
can't do vengeance because you think about things like that.

Speaker 2 (32:41):
But I just want them to know, like I don't
want to know what I want.

Speaker 5 (32:45):
What you really want is for that vengeance the person
who wronged you in the past to become your friend
and then apologize more than get revenge on them.

Speaker 2 (32:53):
Although there's been some people that have turned and been
nice to me after they were rude, and the part
of me that wants to just be like, you suck
and I'm not. I like, there's that's part of me
that still wants me to like them.

Speaker 4 (33:03):
Because they were mean to me.

Speaker 5 (33:05):
Yeah, change because of that.

Speaker 2 (33:07):
That's there's one person who's gotten so nice to me
because I've since I've become slightly famous, and they were
so rude to me, coming up all the time without question,
and I just thought it was because they like kind
of saw through me and saw the parts of me
that I don't like about myself and kind of like
had my number and I almost respected that they just
didn't like me and stuck to it. And then they

(33:29):
turned like I hadn't seen them for six months. Things
happened in my career and they were so nice to me.
I was like, oh, you I liked you before when
I thought you were just a cunt.

Speaker 1 (33:37):
And now like you're just you didn't.

Speaker 4 (33:38):
Like me because that wasn't cool.

Speaker 2 (33:40):
Yeah, and that I thought you didn't like because you
saw through me, but you just didn't like me because
I wasn't what you thought, because I wasn't successful in
your eyes, and and it made me not yeah, And
it made me not fear that person as much. I
was just like, oh, I see through you're pathetic.

Speaker 1 (33:56):
Yeah, it made it was.

Speaker 5 (33:57):
Really lacking any utility.

Speaker 1 (34:00):
Yeah, but I mean there's been people I didn't.

Speaker 2 (34:03):
I'm trying to think of if there's been anyone early
on that I just didn't like. It was kind of
mean too, and then.

Speaker 4 (34:09):
But he didn't get fame. I was so mean to Microcy.
You were mean man? Oh yeah interesting. Oh well when
he showed up, he was like truly like he seemed
like he was molested by.

Speaker 1 (34:21):
Micros is a comedian in New York.

Speaker 2 (34:24):
He's so funny, was so so funny, and I had
to take a couple of years away from him.

Speaker 4 (34:31):
I love Microcy. I think he loved the one of
the funniest.

Speaker 1 (34:35):
I love. He's so funny.

Speaker 4 (34:37):
And when he first started, it was just like you
shouldn't be here, like your energy is weird. Like he
was very like Dylan Cleebold at the open and then
he figured out how to do comedy and I like
would die for a scene.

Speaker 2 (34:52):
Yes, I love him now too, but it's yeah, it turns,
but it's it wasn't because yeah, I got interest, like.

Speaker 7 (34:58):
I started after Microsy. I remember talking to other comedians
of Racine was that person to us who we felt
was like stand offish and mean and like but now
it's just so funny how you can hear from I
feel like Racine was dealing us generational bullying because he
was bullied by Sean.

Speaker 4 (35:20):
Yeah for sure.

Speaker 1 (35:21):
Yeah it does get people her people.

Speaker 7 (35:25):
I'm sure someone bullied you at some point that was
above you in comedy.

Speaker 1 (35:28):
Oh, I mean, I've talked about it so much. But
Saint Louis.

Speaker 2 (35:33):
In Saint Louis, there was this girl that was like,
I just told everyone I I fucked everyone for stage time,
and I was a virgin at the time, and it
was just it was true, truly devastating and made me
want to lead, like I'd never been bullied in that
way in high school or anything like that.

Speaker 4 (35:49):
Do anal though fair.

Speaker 2 (35:53):
I remember reasoning when her because she was drunk once,
being like, did you fuck that? And she was listing
all these comedians I'd opened for, and I go, well, yeah,
I did.

Speaker 1 (36:01):
I blew that one.

Speaker 4 (36:02):
But it's because I really liked it.

Speaker 1 (36:03):
It wasn't for stage time. I actually turned stage time.

Speaker 2 (36:05):
Down because these guys would I never did anything if
I thought I was getting something because they wanted to
fuck me.

Speaker 1 (36:11):
I would never.

Speaker 2 (36:12):
I only wanted to be get stage time because of
my merit. I never thought I was never someone who
used that to get ahead. In fact, there were guys
that would offer me stage time and had never seen
me but wanted to have sex with me. And I
would be like, I'm bad, I'm not gonna do a
spot because I knew that I sucked. So it was
just so weird that she would accuse me of using

(36:33):
that or like and then when I started getting good,
she would just say that they wrote my material for me,
which was just so insulting.

Speaker 4 (36:38):
As well, that sucks.

Speaker 1 (36:40):
That really sucks.

Speaker 7 (36:41):
I used to get laid for stage time, and.

Speaker 4 (36:46):
I used time. I was gay for a while.

Speaker 1 (36:54):
You guys, I feel like, are the same as me.

Speaker 2 (36:55):
As like you none of you were like that thirsty
for stage time when you so everyone needs to see me,
like you didn't believe.

Speaker 4 (37:03):
I was horrified, Like I remember asking for a guest
spot at my club. I started at like after I
was like already, I had to wait till I was
like clearly a top three comic at the open mic.
I was too afraid to like god out in front
of a real audience and like yes, I saw, I
was like over prepared and like I remember Kurt Metzker.

(37:26):
It was like, I'll recommend you to the seller, and
then Julian told me I wasn't ready and it's.

Speaker 1 (37:31):
All you need.

Speaker 4 (37:31):
It's stuck in my head forever still to this day,
where I'm like, well the seller is just so far
out of reade.

Speaker 7 (37:37):
Yeah, I don't think I'm.

Speaker 2 (37:42):
Friends with any comedians who like, I mean, maybe casually
know some of them, but real friends. I don't think
I could be friends with someone who's like I always
knew I had it and people needed to see me.
I believed in my like no one I'm friends with
believes in themselves in that way.

Speaker 4 (37:56):
In fact, any friend I have that like really fucking
it's like braggadocious and like fucking loves themselves, I like
wind up not being friends with them almost immediately because
my natural instinct to that is like I got to
tear that down.

Speaker 2 (38:10):
Because we were actually talking about how long we've been
friend Sean like I reached out. We became friends via
MySpace because we both were like, oh, you're funny, I'm funny.
Let's hang out or like, let's at least talk on
my Space. And then we eventually hung out and I
was talking about like, yeah, I think I had good
taste in people friends, even early on, and I because
I did that with a lot of people and reached
out to them, and some immediately I just revealed themselves

(38:30):
to be way too confident. I think they're too cool,
and I just couldn't. I had to be fake around
them because I had to like be the same way
I wasn't. I was so insecure.

Speaker 4 (38:41):
Because I'm an energy energy matcher, like so yes. So
then I'm like, I feel very uncomfortable when I'm like
around somebody who's just like I fucking rip it every
time I'm on the stay, I'm like.

Speaker 1 (38:55):
Okay, this is totally what we're going to.

Speaker 4 (38:57):
No.

Speaker 7 (38:57):
No, just when people get off stage and they bomb horribly,
but they have the confidence, like they just.

Speaker 4 (39:04):
Tore the roof off, it's just wild. I remember I
stopping friends with three people in New York because I
saw them on stage bomb. I get talking about how
funny they were on stage. I was just like, I
can't know you. I don't want to know you.

Speaker 1 (39:15):
No, I've had to distance message, like I've.

Speaker 4 (39:18):
Never said I'm funny because I'm so afraid of saying
that and then proving I'm not.

Speaker 2 (39:22):
I mean, that's why Instagram some it just makes me
so uncomfortable to see some of my friends on there
because it is a brag machine you have to like
and that's why I can't even look my own stuff.
Makes me cringe sometimes because you have to like tell
people how.

Speaker 1 (39:33):
Well you're doing.

Speaker 2 (39:34):
And it's really a gross quality and does not attract
the right people to you.

Speaker 1 (39:40):
No, if they're falling for.

Speaker 4 (39:41):
It, no, but it attracts people with money to you
because people like they hate self deprecating humor.

Speaker 2 (39:47):
I know, it's that is so true, because that's why
they're all confident.

Speaker 4 (39:52):
Confident. You're not confident?

Speaker 3 (39:54):
Ye?

Speaker 4 (39:54):
Why why are you saying? Why make you suck at
all aspects of life?

Speaker 1 (40:00):
Yeah, it's okay. Taking a sharp turn.

Speaker 2 (40:03):
I saw something that I thought would make you all
laugh because I think you both know.

Speaker 1 (40:07):
Do you know you guys know bright eyes?

Speaker 4 (40:08):
Yes, bright eyes.

Speaker 1 (40:11):
This is the first day of my life.

Speaker 4 (40:14):
I literally have a text menu from yesterday where I
was like, the only reason why I ever voted to
begin with was bright Eyes because he said but for
Jock Carry and I was like, done, well, okay.

Speaker 2 (40:27):
I was on Reddit and it was the music Subreddit,
and it was like Bright Eyes, I guess canceled all
concerts for the remainder of their tour because he has
vocal cord issues.

Speaker 1 (40:39):
Shout out, I've been through it.

Speaker 5 (40:40):
It sucks.

Speaker 2 (40:42):
But so sometimes Reddit can just be so funny, and
this was a hidden funny Reddit thing. And someone wrote
the first comment is this is.

Speaker 1 (40:49):
The worst tour of my life.

Speaker 8 (40:51):
And then the next person goes, swear I was gonna
see bride Eyes play. They sucked it up. I logged
on to read it. Suddenly everything changed. The next person wrote,
they're saying cancelation leaked, and then underneath that this was
the first post that I saw. Next person, these are
all different people, swear that that I already had tickets.

Speaker 1 (41:13):
His voice is strained. Suddenly tours are changed, they're saying,
and then uh oh, guess they're saying.

Speaker 8 (41:20):
And then the bless person goes, guess I'll go to sleep.

Speaker 2 (41:25):
I just love when everyone agrees to like do something
and comment on comments.

Speaker 1 (41:31):
It was so satisfying to me.

Speaker 4 (41:33):
It's fine too.

Speaker 7 (41:33):
That song is like the least stressful on your voice ever.

Speaker 9 (41:37):
Yeah, oh yeah, that's true, Like yeah, but if you
ever hearing, yeah, it's been thirty five years of vocal strain.

Speaker 2 (41:49):
Oh my god, at the Bottom of Everything, Oh my god,
Can we just talk about.

Speaker 1 (41:53):
That song for a second.

Speaker 2 (41:54):
That's the one? Is that the one that made you
scared of air travel?

Speaker 4 (41:59):
I mean, they're so well.

Speaker 1 (42:00):
It starts out.

Speaker 2 (42:01):
If you've never heard it, listen to the At the
Bottom of Everything, Busty's go listen to the song.

Speaker 1 (42:06):
It's one of the best songs. But it starts out
with there was a woman on a plane.

Speaker 2 (42:09):
She was reading her book and she was really bored
and listless.

Speaker 1 (42:13):
Do you remember this?

Speaker 2 (42:14):
And then there's a man next to her, and suddenly
the plane starts shaking and people are screaming, and the
man next to her says, She looks the man next
to him, and she goes, what's happening. He goes, it's
your birthday, darling. We're going to a birthday party, and
everyone loves.

Speaker 1 (42:32):
You very very very very very very very very very
very But he's like, it's so creepy.

Speaker 2 (42:38):
And then it turns in this like really lovely song
about a plane crashing and like going to the next
phase of your life, and it's so good and creepy
and I love it.

Speaker 4 (42:46):
He was the Dylan of our general Yeah, like he
kind of was. Yeah, I mean like truly, Like in
high school, I listened to like the Calendar hung Itself.

Speaker 1 (42:54):
Oh I don't know that one.

Speaker 4 (42:55):
It's so great. It's like it's all about just like
unrequited love in high school and it is about killing
yourself because she'll never be with you. And I would
listen to that song five times a day, like just
being like here I go.

Speaker 2 (43:09):
Like man like music in high school and when you're like.

Speaker 4 (43:13):
Not Depeche Mode was like that for me.

Speaker 1 (43:16):
Oh really what song?

Speaker 4 (43:17):
I can't I don't remember any names.

Speaker 7 (43:19):
It was just a feeling of like being so sad
and just leaning into.

Speaker 2 (43:22):
It as like all in relationships and have been for
a while, Like doesn't music just like not get it
get you is hard anymore? Like I gotta like contra,
I gotta get a little high sometimes because I want
to like remember a time what I need, like shift
my perspective to listen to some music because I want
to like remember when I felt that way when.

Speaker 1 (43:43):
I was listening to the song and being like I
love this, Oh I love me.

Speaker 4 (43:46):
Like I truly I miss I miss Like I was
like a real emo kid, Like I really miss like
listening to like bands like Thursday where it's aggression, but
then also there's like horrible songs about just getting broken
up with and you just there's a song called how
Long Is the Night by Thursday that I would just
like cry every night listening to, and I'm like, now
I listen to it, I'm like, this is pathetic. Now

(44:10):
you cry watching the Mets. But yeah, I wish I
could just go back to feeling like there's.

Speaker 2 (44:16):
No songs about like long term committed relationships that would
ever listen the same kind of emotions as any breakup songs.

Speaker 4 (44:23):
Well, there's divorce. You get to divorce songs.

Speaker 2 (44:26):
Yeah, that's that's what we all are going to get. Yeah,
all right, I'm.

Speaker 4 (44:31):
Getting fights and I'll put on music like in the.

Speaker 7 (44:33):
Shower, Yeah, with like I found myself sitting on the
floor of a shower like listening to.

Speaker 2 (44:40):
Like pretending you're in a music video or pretending you're
like a Lifetime movie.

Speaker 4 (44:44):
I'm like, you'll get to a fight with your girlfriend
and then you'll go in the shower and.

Speaker 7 (44:49):
Just sit on the floor in a listening to like
the cheesiest music you've ever heard.

Speaker 1 (44:54):
I'll tell you what I do break I have been recently.

Speaker 2 (45:02):
Like the only time I will feel like because Chris
and I kind of have a really good plan for
when we fight, it doesn't last long. I can't really
put a song to it. It's just like resolves itself.
We're like in a we've been in a really good
place for months and months and months, so I can't
really get emotional about songs. But like I can have
fights with girlfriends and then I've been really into bad
blood and I imagine like I'm never gonna talk to

(45:23):
you again, and I sing because maybe now we got
bad and I've like been on a treadmill like fucking gym,
and then it really helps to be processed. And then
that's that's what. Now that I'm in my relationship is good.
I'm like looking for fights with my girlfriends to be like,
I'll never we had such a good thing.

Speaker 1 (45:39):
This is why we can't have nice things.

Speaker 2 (45:40):
By Taylor Swift, like it's turned into girl friendships and
I'll like fucking burn them down.

Speaker 5 (45:45):
Oh but you can do that without friendships. You can
do that with career stuff. Enemies, Oh, enemies that succeed
or whatever. I go to the gym, and I'm like,
that's what when I listen to it. When I listen
to rap music at the gym, I'm thinking about destroying
the people who made that show.

Speaker 4 (46:02):
That sucks. Oh wow, that's cool. I don't. I gotta
get more vengeance in my life. It's all.

Speaker 5 (46:09):
It's all like I'm driven by Spike, I will say.
And it does feel a lot of my This is actually.

Speaker 4 (46:15):
Weird that you bring up Bright Eyes because I was
in New Jersey this past week with my parents and
we got into a massive fight.

Speaker 2 (46:22):
Oh yeah, we were on a zoom call and you
were like, I just got into a huge fight with
my parents.

Speaker 1 (46:26):
I'm three, Celsius is into the day.

Speaker 4 (46:27):
Yeah, oh my god. So we got into like a
two hour long foot fight, and the entire ride home
from New York that night, I just listened to Bright
Eyes and I was like, oh my god, it was
I was just I'm seventeen. I was again with your parents, yea,
with my parents. Like it all like it just clicked
right now. Like I'm like, so, I'm like I have

(46:47):
not listened to Bright Eyes in forever, and it like
was really soothing. And it was only because I fought
with my pants. Wow, Like I fought with them like
I was seventeen, Like I was like jumping up and down.

Speaker 1 (46:57):
Scream Oh my god.

Speaker 2 (46:59):
It's crazy that it can just put you right back
there with your parents.

Speaker 1 (47:03):
I am sut. I like I found myself being my.

Speaker 2 (47:06):
Parents are in town right now, and uh, being such
a bitch last night final thought, like last night going
to dinner, like I can't my dad eating with chopsticks
bothers me so much. It's just watching him try to
get these little cucumbers, like get a proper bite. I

(47:28):
can't focus on anything he's saying. I'm just like, use
a fork. But it's not even like I'm just like
learn how to like you play guitar really well, Like
how are you able to do?

Speaker 3 (47:36):
Like?

Speaker 2 (47:37):
And you can't do it's so annoying to be Yeah,
it's just I just don't understand and and like I'm
being such a brat about it. And then he also
the way he orders bothers me. He'll be like, so,
what's this she's so with the miso dried and then the.

Speaker 1 (47:56):
Sea bass on the side.

Speaker 2 (47:57):
He'll ask what the thing is and then the waiter
will just say the same thing. So it's the drive
she's so with the flaky meats, and then you'll go, okay,
I'll have that, and it's like he doesn't learn anything.
Why do you have to ask so many questions?

Speaker 1 (48:12):
I just know what I want.

Speaker 4 (48:14):
I don't have to ask when someone goes, what do
you what do you like here to the waiter? Yeah,
and I don't know why don't? Well?

Speaker 5 (48:24):
Sometimes I ask what's the most popular dish?

Speaker 2 (48:26):
That's ok that's okay, that's okay, that's actually information, that's
that's important. Why would you ask a person another person who.

Speaker 1 (48:33):
You don't know.

Speaker 2 (48:34):
You don't know how they eat, You don't know what
they like. They just give it to the table. You
don't know anything about them, what they It's like it's full.
It seems to be like, mom, just make it. You're
one to meet, you're one of us. We're not gonna
treat you differently because you're a waiter. It's like, yes,
I am, you're waiting on me. I'm not gonna treat
you less then, but it's your job to wait on me.
I don't need to be buddies.

Speaker 5 (48:51):
Besides, I go like, what's what's your favorite dish? And
then they'll go with the caesar sal and go.

Speaker 4 (48:55):
I don't want that exactly.

Speaker 1 (49:01):
Party won.

Speaker 7 (49:02):
They also picked the third cheapest thing or the third Well, yeah,
I love but if you're not going to get the
filet to Sam and his fans the.

Speaker 5 (49:12):
Worst, that's the worst when they answer with every single
thing on the menu.

Speaker 4 (49:16):
Also, but I.

Speaker 2 (49:17):
Really do appreciate when they go it's that that's nice.

Speaker 4 (49:22):
Che he heard that would lose his when they got
none of the time. Like, I've studied the menu beforehand.
I know what I'm doing going in, and I'm like,
I want to make this as quick as possible because
I got to get back to like saying something inappropriate.
And you are like the principal for something to.

Speaker 1 (49:42):
Get obsessed with.

Speaker 2 (49:45):
Efficiency obviously, And there's nothing more I like than meals
with friends. I want them to last forever. I never
ever want them to end. But I do not like pageantry.

Speaker 1 (49:56):
Of eating out.

Speaker 2 (49:57):
And I think the more money you spend at a place,
there's more bullshit that these people have to do.

Speaker 1 (50:03):
And I do respect waiters.

Speaker 2 (50:04):
I want you to I don't want you to misinterpret
me being like I don't want to be chummy with waiter.
It's because it's fake to me to be chummy with waiter.
We're not friends. They have a job, they have other tables.
I don't need to like act like they're buds with me.
And so I'm not being disrespectful. I just I'm being
actually respectful by not acting like I care how their
day was.

Speaker 5 (50:22):
Yeah, I don't don't want to talk to anybody but anything.

Speaker 2 (50:24):
I don't want you to give me the drink menu
and withhold the food menu. No boo, I don't I want.
I want the food menu right out the out of
the gate. Drink menu is irrelevant. People who are interested
in a drink menu become an alcoholic or just stop drinking,
like you know what you like. Like, I don't like
being like, let me try this cocktail, like I can't.

Speaker 1 (50:46):
I don't hang with people that are.

Speaker 2 (50:47):
Just like, oh, I'll try a fun new cocktail and
I'll just have a couple of SIPs of it.

Speaker 4 (50:51):
It's so weird. It's like it's like being into Pokemon
as an adult or something where you're like, I, I
gotta try them all.

Speaker 2 (51:00):
Calories in a fruity, dumb beverage that has been put
together because of like what they ordered too much.

Speaker 4 (51:05):
Of Yeah St. Patrick's day.

Speaker 2 (51:09):
Mad respect to anyone who who eats their drinks their
calories and has like a sane relationship with food, and
they're like, I just want to try a fun, fruity drink,
like God love you. I don't relate to anything in
your life. And that is so cool to me. But
drink menus are bullshit to me, Like, I don't want
of them propped up. If you like wine, get the chardonnay,
get the red like you, we don't you need to do.

Speaker 1 (51:30):
A taste testing of it.

Speaker 4 (51:31):
That's really yeahane to me?

Speaker 1 (51:34):
Is that the only thing that taste test by the way, Yeah.

Speaker 4 (51:38):
As somebody who drinks dire coke like.

Speaker 6 (51:40):
That, you should have a fun it should different.

Speaker 1 (51:47):
You are so right, that's where you should just swirl
it around.

Speaker 4 (51:51):
Yeah, no, put more is a four day ago.

Speaker 1 (51:55):
That is such a good point. That's a good bit.

Speaker 2 (51:57):
You should do that bit because it's it's that that's
the only time where a beverage really is wine tastes bad.

Speaker 4 (52:06):
Taste. I'm like, oh, yes, it's wine, and.

Speaker 7 (52:09):
I've never seen someone taste it and go no, and
if before yeah, she goes, I don't like that raw
chicken because I don't want you.

Speaker 1 (52:21):
What could be bad about it?

Speaker 4 (52:23):
Like, it doesn't taste good. Sometimes it doesn't taste good.

Speaker 1 (52:25):
Its wine, it's not supposed to. They're fermented.

Speaker 2 (52:27):
There are grapes that have gone bad and they turn sour,
so they turn to literal poison. Alcohol is a poison.
It's not supposed to taste good. I'm so tired of
alcohol culture. It's all bullshit. If you like beer, you
do not like the taste of beer. You do think
you like it because you're lying to yourself that you
like it because it makes you fucked up.

Speaker 1 (52:46):
You would never drink beer if it didn't make you
fucked up. And I know you.

Speaker 2 (52:50):
Go No, I drink non alcoholic beer because you used
to get fucked up on beer, and it reminds you
of when you used to get sucked up. It's still
about a feeling. It's not actually the taste is not
actually good. Children do not like to taste of beer. Here.

Speaker 1 (53:00):
If children don't like the taste of something, it actually
tastes bad.

Speaker 3 (53:03):
And I am.

Speaker 1 (53:03):
I fall for this stuff too. I love coffee. I
think toffee tastes good. It doesn't.

Speaker 4 (53:09):
Yeah, the first time.

Speaker 2 (53:10):
No one likes coffee the first time they drink it. It
is a bitter, bad taste and that's why you add
sugar and cream.

Speaker 4 (53:16):
Yeah, I've hated the taste of coffee my entire life.
It's never gotten better. And I drink it black and
yeah I love it. Yeah, but I don't.

Speaker 2 (53:24):
But it does not taste good. I'm not lying to
my house. It tastes like it feels good.

Speaker 4 (53:30):
Yeah, And then people are like, oh, you go to Starbucks,
Like what do you like? There's so many better coffee plays.
I'm like, not to make it tastes like shit.

Speaker 2 (53:38):
Garbage, because you're right, it does.

Speaker 1 (53:41):
You sound like Bill Maher when I'm talking this way.

Speaker 2 (53:44):
But I do feel a little bit of condescent densnsial.

Speaker 4 (53:48):
If there was caffeine and gatorade, it's all I would drink.
And of course, people, you.

Speaker 2 (53:52):
Don't realize that these things are drugs you are drinking.
And I'm working on a bit about how motherhood is
also a thing that people convince them selves they love
because and they really do think they love it. It's
not like they're like lying to themselves. You do think
you love coffee. It is the same as loving its.

Speaker 7 (54:10):
Dinner, and they brought out I got a decalf. I
don't know what I was thinking. I think it's such
a strong move. I don't like the taste of coffee.

Speaker 2 (54:17):
I loved coffee because it makes you feel the way
coffee would make you feel.

Speaker 1 (54:22):
Decaf does work, and I do. I do drink because
it has a little bit.

Speaker 2 (54:26):
Caftle bit and it's just like an a beer, like
it gives you the feeling that you're doing the thing
that used to give you the feeling like it's it.

Speaker 4 (54:33):
I felt like I didn't know.

Speaker 7 (54:34):
I didn't finish the decaff because I knew that the
end result wouldn't be me having a fun time on caffeine, right,
So I was just like, oh, I don't even like coffee.

Speaker 4 (54:42):
Why did I even get this?

Speaker 2 (54:43):
More like that I always make about beer when people go, no,
beer is good. I went to a Froio place and
they had a beer flavor once and I went up
and I asked, I go, how how much you got
to change that one? And they go never, no one ever.
They sample it because it's funny, but no one. If
you liked the taste of beer so much, would that
be an ice cream flavor? People enjoy. It's not guess
what other other flavor ice cream? People don't get that

(55:04):
much coffee. Coffee, sometimes they do. It's nice a little
because you don't want to eat too much of it
because it tastes bad.

Speaker 4 (55:10):
Yeah, it's so bitter. It is, honestly like I want
a sugary treat, but I also don't want to enjoy myself.

Speaker 2 (55:17):
Yes, yes, and you bars and dark chocolate bar also
not good.

Speaker 4 (55:22):
Dark chocolate. No chocolate. Dark chocolate is delicious. I eat
so much.

Speaker 1 (55:32):
Delicious as milk chocolate.

Speaker 4 (55:33):
And the reason chol.

Speaker 5 (55:36):
Your scale chocolate sucks.

Speaker 4 (55:38):
Milk chocolate is so good.

Speaker 5 (55:40):
God, it sucks.

Speaker 4 (55:42):
It's it's too smooth. No, it's I love how that is.
Dark chocolate honestly tastes like you're eating chocolate like it's not.

Speaker 2 (55:51):
And then the lower percentage you go, the worse it is,
but you eat it because it's it's better than nothing.

Speaker 1 (55:57):
Your jaws moving.

Speaker 5 (55:59):
Can I quickly go back to the beer? Can places
stop beer battering everything and putting beer and cheese and
making our chicken beer batter and it just has you
just adding beer.

Speaker 4 (56:12):
No, Yeah, I'm sorry.

Speaker 2 (56:13):
If you're someone who loves wine and you love beer
and you love coffee, and you do think that they
taste good, like, because I've gotten sony fights of people
and people really do think they taste good. And I
also think coffee tastes good. I just want to say,
it's your brain pulling a trick on you, because it's
same with onions and stuff. Like you really when I
read that Alan Carr book about drinking and how alcohol

(56:35):
doesn't taste good and any and the same one with
the caffeine book, Like if you give a child something
and they go like that equals.

Speaker 1 (56:43):
It doesn't taste good. And we all have to get
to enjoy coffee. We all have to get past that tomato.

Speaker 4 (56:50):
Yeah, you have to deal with vegetables a lot of
the time. It's like you have to push through it
and like you have to trick your brain.

Speaker 2 (56:56):
And put oils and sweets, like that's why carameling onions
makes them good.

Speaker 4 (57:01):
Like grilled onions great.

Speaker 1 (57:05):
But the feeling I think.

Speaker 2 (57:07):
We get mixed up with, Like I taselthing tastes good
because it gives me the feeling because it's all kind
of like the same but still the ritual and oh
my god, oh the Starbucks ritual. Opening the door of
a Starbucks is what I'm there for, Putting holding that
cup in my hand. The warm if it's a cup
without the handwarmer, not as good as a drink. I'm

(57:29):
not tasting the can warm. It's all a lie, but
it tastes different to me.

Speaker 4 (57:32):
With the ritual is so important that the Starbucks that
I walked to every morning by my house was close
for like they were redesigning it for like two weeks.
So I was going to a different Starbucks and like
redesign it, yeah, like they I guess they're.

Speaker 1 (57:46):
A new mural on the wall kind of yeah.

Speaker 4 (57:49):
Justifying that we like unions. But like you, they close
for two weeks, and I was going to this other
Starbucks and it was really terrible, Like I hated the
Southern Starbucks and now the new one that's opened again,
and they all I wanted, it turns out, was them
to be like, hey, Sean, how are you? They know

(58:11):
my name? That's all I've wanted. Yep, they a bar,
it's a bartend. It's the same.

Speaker 2 (58:16):
Oh my Starbucks, the one I go to in Saint
Louis and the one I go to here when I
mobile order, they fucking rush that ship. They know I
am and they wink when they hand it to me,
like it's so good. It's the best, the best, and
they make it. You can taste the love in it. Yeah,
it's but nothing bugs me more than a Starbucks.

Speaker 1 (58:39):
That's like, you know, do you get lattes?

Speaker 9 (58:41):
No?

Speaker 1 (58:41):
You don't? You get Yeah, you have no fun with coffee.

Speaker 4 (58:43):
I have no fun with coffee. I'm a black But
like Aaron gets the fun drink of the month every day,
she does. Yeah, So like right now, it's like a Chris.

Speaker 1 (58:54):
I want to be that person so badly.

Speaker 4 (58:56):
That's a fun person milk latte. Uh hell yes, And
she does that and I'm like.

Speaker 1 (59:02):
Cool, that's a good couple.

Speaker 4 (59:05):
As getting the alcohol drink.

Speaker 2 (59:07):
It's different, yes, And I want to be that person too,
But I'm never going to be that person. And I
don't hate that person. I want to make a distinction.
It sounded like I hated that person. I don't relate
to you on any level. Someone being like because that's
someone who doesn't have an eating disorder of any kind
to me, because they're.

Speaker 4 (59:24):
Just like the.

Speaker 2 (59:26):
Sugar bomb and have And I'm going to risk calories
for a new taste, not on my watch. Not if
I'm gonna get calories, I want exactly what the calories
I want are.

Speaker 7 (59:39):
Some people go through the menu too, and they're like,
I don't know what I'm getting and they always get
the same three things.

Speaker 2 (59:44):
Oh someone who goes when someone's if you're winning the
line and you get to the front of line and
you do it, I mean walk in front of traffic,
like on the way out. Have that be your last
because I can't get in and this is a dining
out too. Look at your menus then shut. Let's all

(01:00:07):
shut our menus to send a message. Yes, let's get
our order in before other tables.

Speaker 4 (01:00:12):
Yeah. I don't believe intele epathy on last time at
a restaurant because like what I have decided, I'm like
trying to sync up with they like all right, come,
we're ready now.

Speaker 1 (01:00:23):
But I love dining out so much. It's my favorite
thing in the whole world.

Speaker 7 (01:00:26):
I like dining out, but with purpose, like you got it.
It's not it can be a long dinner, but.

Speaker 4 (01:00:32):
I want to get long dinner I love, but I
want to get it in.

Speaker 7 (01:00:35):
I want to get the appetizers in. I need apps
within the first five to ten minutes.

Speaker 1 (01:00:40):
I don't care for apps. I want all the food
out at once or that's even bad. But I don't
mind if other people eat apps. I like watching people.

Speaker 2 (01:00:45):
But I will say we went out to lunch before
the Jets game last week, uh huh, and we got
with I and me Columbus Circle in Columbus Circle. And
then I got back to the hotel room and I
was said to Chris, I was like, I gotta tell you,
that's all I want to do in my life is
just sit at a table with funny people by funny
friends who we kind of all know each other but

(01:01:07):
like all kind of don't like we're still like getting
to share news stories and like it was so satisfying.
I just love going out to eat with friends. And
I need let me just say, did you hear I
said friends, I don't really like dining with one.

Speaker 4 (01:01:23):
On one on one. No, I don't alone.

Speaker 1 (01:01:26):
The thing I learned about myself no.

Speaker 4 (01:01:28):
Yeah, no conversation. Yeah, I love. I love basically this
is so like curb your enthusiasm coded in me. But
I love a six person table. I like kind of
being in the.

Speaker 1 (01:01:42):
Middle, yes, because you're what's it called.

Speaker 4 (01:01:47):
Or like yeah, like I love like that's like my
dream scenarios, just always doing that.

Speaker 1 (01:01:56):
I I love it. And this is what this podcast is.

Speaker 2 (01:01:58):
Stuff we're not eating, but we should eat.

Speaker 4 (01:02:03):
We should restaurant. Be so upset Phil Rosenthal they eat
on his podcast and it's always it's so hard to
listen to.

Speaker 2 (01:02:12):
Yeah, yeah, unless it's ASMR and it's like exactly the
way I want. But diet coke I'm back on. It's
never going away. I just heard Heather McMahon on social
media talking about how she was off diet coke for
fifteen years or something and she's back on it.

Speaker 4 (01:02:29):
Well, she thought diet coke killed her dad.

Speaker 9 (01:02:32):
Really ye oh no, that's what she put Like, how
like in the music fire Away, was he like run
over by a die?

Speaker 4 (01:02:40):
Now he had twenty five and he drove his fucking Camaro.

Speaker 1 (01:02:43):
It's a clut.

Speaker 2 (01:02:45):
Everyone has so much guilt around it, and I'm like,
I don't understand why, but we all must know that
it's just terrible for us because of the hold it
has on us.

Speaker 4 (01:02:53):
Yeah, I mean I'm obsessed with it.

Speaker 1 (01:02:55):
Why I can't say why I am.

Speaker 4 (01:02:58):
Yeah, I really feel like if di if they outlawed
diet coke, I might like jump off.

Speaker 7 (01:03:05):
In Europe, they don't have diet coke. They just have
coke zero.

Speaker 4 (01:03:08):
Yeah, I know, I don't.

Speaker 2 (01:03:10):
I had one the other day and I was like,
I feel like I'm in Europe, like, yeah, it doesn't
hit the spot, and it does hit.

Speaker 4 (01:03:16):
In Europe though, I don't know, maybe just because you
don't have another option.

Speaker 7 (01:03:19):
Maybe ice, Yeah, ice makes Europe.

Speaker 2 (01:03:25):
I'm sorry I will Some European vesties write me and say,
why would a Why would you have a coke zero
or any kind of soda and not want it to
be cold?

Speaker 1 (01:03:36):
Like why would you? Why would that make that beverage better?

Speaker 4 (01:03:40):
Is there?

Speaker 1 (01:03:40):
I just don't understand there's anyone that would enjoy it.

Speaker 4 (01:03:43):
Are they just so smart about it knowing that like
they'll like it more and they know they shouldn't like
it more that they're doing it.

Speaker 1 (01:03:50):
Oh, they're like trying to.

Speaker 4 (01:03:53):
They're doing it. Yes, dark chocolate.

Speaker 5 (01:03:56):
Dark chocolate is good. It's delicious. It's better than milk chocolate.

Speaker 4 (01:04:00):
No, that's why.

Speaker 2 (01:04:01):
I don't ice. If it comes out really cold, but
then I have to chug it. But Europeans sip everything,
so everything gets lukewarm. I want to understand why are
like lukewarm, So.

Speaker 7 (01:04:12):
I would think is one they don't want the water
to water down.

Speaker 4 (01:04:16):
Their diet coke.

Speaker 7 (01:04:17):
They are taking it, yeah, and they're taking it well,
and they just mainline in the diet coke. They just
want to get all diet coke.

Speaker 4 (01:04:25):
You don't want to want need to be cold.

Speaker 1 (01:04:27):
And they're not.

Speaker 7 (01:04:28):
And it's not like it's not not cold though it's
not like a hot hot.

Speaker 4 (01:04:34):
I think I.

Speaker 2 (01:04:34):
Would like you got at I would like it hot
better than just like room to like I'm not really
but like it's really almost susp.

Speaker 7 (01:04:42):
Ever tried to chug die coke after being hungover, Oh,
it almost kills you. You almost blow up like a seagulls.

Speaker 4 (01:04:48):
Like insane. Cold diet coke though when you're hungover is incredible,
Like I could probably drink like I guess, I guess
not to quench your third pond of it.

Speaker 1 (01:04:57):
I woke up in the middle of night last night
and all I had was diet coke.

Speaker 2 (01:05:00):
I mean there was tap water, but.

Speaker 1 (01:05:04):
My killed mother's dad, so I was like, I'm not
doing that.

Speaker 2 (01:05:08):
So I cracked open a die coke and I remember
counting the chugs. I did ten chugs and just set
it down and then went back to sleep, and I
woke this morning to it. It was It was insane.
But I've always been a chugger. I remember my dad
as a kid being.

Speaker 1 (01:05:22):
Like Jesus Christ, slow down. I just like chug things
really hard.

Speaker 4 (01:05:27):
Do you eat dinner fast as kids like to get it?
I eat fast, I drank fast.

Speaker 1 (01:05:31):
I do everything fast.

Speaker 4 (01:05:32):
Yeah. I ate as slow as humanly, really.

Speaker 2 (01:05:35):
Or the slowest eater. I'm very envious of it. It's
a very great habitat.

Speaker 4 (01:05:40):
Do you enjoy your parents' conversations? No, I just want
to savor the food.

Speaker 5 (01:05:45):
He licks cats.

Speaker 4 (01:05:48):
I don't. I don't eats.

Speaker 2 (01:05:50):
I'm starting I say kit cat, and then I will
adjust because no one knows what you're saying big cat.
If I say he licks big cats.

Speaker 4 (01:05:57):
Yeah, you sound like Trump.

Speaker 1 (01:06:02):
You're not HATI you just are patient.

Speaker 4 (01:06:04):
Wait wait, brought back a kit cat kick.

Speaker 2 (01:06:08):
So there's a kit cat. There's a big kick out
called a big cat. So I started, believe me, I
know the it's great.

Speaker 4 (01:06:15):
It's really honestly, it's cat.

Speaker 2 (01:06:19):
Brian to savor it, will lick it, nibble it, it
will he could probably suck on a kit cat like
a John Mellon cat sucking on kit cats.

Speaker 1 (01:06:33):
On the set of That Boy Island.

Speaker 2 (01:06:36):
You and and like just take little nibbles and like
savor it.

Speaker 4 (01:06:40):
It's it's where do you put it? You just keep
it in the wrapper.

Speaker 5 (01:06:43):
You don't keep it in the melts you got. You
gotta be very careful about that because it will melt
in your head. Melting kit cats is horrend That's why.

Speaker 4 (01:06:53):
Yeah, that makes sense.

Speaker 2 (01:06:55):
Yeah, well I eat it fast because the dopamine is
like you want get more more, but you get a
little addiction.

Speaker 5 (01:07:01):
Little nibblets of dopamine over the hours.

Speaker 4 (01:07:05):
La you're eating it over courts of suff That is
kid hours something to do the same because you don't
want and it's just not.

Speaker 2 (01:07:16):
A big He does not need restraint to do this.
It is his natural way like all of us. But
we'd be like, you know, it's insane.

Speaker 7 (01:07:23):
Spend spend the friend and you're a kid and you
go to like circle K with three of your boys
and you all get your boy.

Speaker 4 (01:07:35):
Your buddy is like three hours later.

Speaker 7 (01:07:37):
After playing football and you're like you're still on that
Oh my god.

Speaker 4 (01:07:41):
Like my friends would have destroyed that, Like my friends
have destroyed all all joy in my life. Yeah that
I would never do high school drama because of them.
Like I like, honestly, if I had like a Snickers
and I licked it in front of them, Like, honestly,
I got how gay for watching straight porn that had

(01:08:03):
a guy in it?

Speaker 2 (01:08:06):
I was. I asked Sean the other day, like, I
forget how you got into stand up, Like did you
do plays in high school? And he was like I
really wanted to, but I couldn't because my friends made
fun of me.

Speaker 1 (01:08:14):
I'm like, that is such bullshit.

Speaker 4 (01:08:16):
Yeah, I got cast in a play and they made
fun of me so much that I quit the play,
like lighting down my drama teacher, who I was. I love.

Speaker 7 (01:08:24):
It is kind of funny to do that too, when
you're like, we played sports, we were decent, We're pretty
good at sports, but I wasn't good enough to give
up on something else. Yeah yeah, yeah, it's just yeah,
but you would be called gay in high school.

Speaker 2 (01:08:40):
But I really can remember every guy. I remember any
meal that I've eaten slowly because it's taken so much
strength and determination. Well I've had to do it, you know,
in front of if I'm at like lunch with an
agent when I was twenty four or something, you know,
like I literally can remember every single time I've ever eaten.
I'm like a normal person. Yeah it had to eat

(01:09:02):
or on a date or something, and I'm chewing with
my mouth clothed, like, but it's it's not something that
comes naturally to me at all.

Speaker 4 (01:09:07):
You're you're right, but like when I get if you
get like a seafood tower with like your agent, Like
I'm all of a sudden in my head being like, well,
technically I'm supposed to have another one, but I also
know I should wait because they're like they're normal. You're
feeling judged, you know, Yeah, I'm not.

Speaker 2 (01:09:26):
I'm not picking up the broccolini stocks with my hands,
which is the way to eat broccolini in my opinion,
I have to like cut it and then not eat
the stem that I want to eat because I'm trying
to look how and I get proud of myself, like
I'm like a like I can't imagine being someone who
doesn't finish everything on their plate that they like. Like
I imagine if you don't like a thing, leave it,
but if you liked it, and you're just like, no,

(01:09:48):
I'm just good.

Speaker 1 (01:09:49):
No, it doesn't.

Speaker 7 (01:09:50):
I get in ways where I'll make noise like you
don't really, I don't realize what I'm doing. Yeah, yeah,
and I'm licking my fingers and then I look up
and people are like, it looks like I've murdered a
fucking hooker and I don't know. It's just terrible and
I don't realize it. And I try to get to
a state when you're eating.

Speaker 4 (01:10:10):
Yeah, I get yeah, I get it. Yeah, I think
I know. I feel you.

Speaker 7 (01:10:13):
I've done things where I like, I'll put like a
like a mint in my mouth and try not to
chew on it, like to test myself within seconds i'm chewing.

Speaker 4 (01:10:23):
I think that I like suck the color off of
eminem peanuts that I just But.

Speaker 2 (01:10:32):
Because when I'm eating something i'm a little bit ashamed
of eating, I want it. I want to almost as
a part of me that's like I want to be
done feeling the shame. So I want to eat it
fast to get it out of the way, and I
don't enjoy It's such a food. Addiction is such a
fucked thing because you don't any addiction when you're in
the throes of it, you're not enjoying the thing that

(01:10:52):
you are doing that you are rearranging your life around
to do. You can't even enjoy it while you're doing it.
The shame afterwards makes you want to do it more
because it's the only way you can feel better about
the thing you just did, and it leads to more shame.

Speaker 1 (01:11:04):
It's so fucked. But like most of the time I'm eating,
I'm not like this is delicious.

Speaker 7 (01:11:09):
It's like if I get a Domino's flat flat bread,
not the flat bread whatever that crust.

Speaker 4 (01:11:15):
Yeah, the first half I'm I don't even know I'm
eating it.

Speaker 7 (01:11:18):
No, But the last three I finally can taste it,
you know, I finally because it's big enough. I gotta
get the large you gotta you gotta eat one something first.

Speaker 4 (01:11:28):
You're so youngry, you gotta.

Speaker 5 (01:11:31):
A bunch of vegetables that you're not hungry.

Speaker 2 (01:11:35):
I eating before meals so that I can maybe eat
a little bit normally and not be so out of control,
like have a decent snack that just gives me something
that i'm because I always think that I'm never going
to be full, Like there's never enough, Like I I
there's some delusion in my mind that is my body
will never.

Speaker 1 (01:11:54):
Just be like, no, I'm good, because it is true.
I'm almost never just fully.

Speaker 2 (01:12:00):
The only time I know him full is if I'm
about to throw up, Like I don't understand being like
I'm good.

Speaker 4 (01:12:05):
Ever, my stomach blow. That's the key. I blow it
and I go, Okay, I'm blowed.

Speaker 7 (01:12:10):
I can't I can't move, I can't breathe. I have
trouble breathing.

Speaker 5 (01:12:13):
That's why you got to eat slow, because then you wait,
your brain's got to catch up to your stomach.

Speaker 4 (01:12:17):
I don't know. I wish I could do it, likesking.

Speaker 1 (01:12:20):
A cigarette like slow, Like that's not a thing.

Speaker 4 (01:12:23):
Those down. I'm just rushing through everything to get to
the next thing. I rushed through, yes, like.

Speaker 7 (01:12:29):
The funny at part to it, Like all we're talking
about is how coffee we drink, and I don't know
why we do.

Speaker 5 (01:12:36):
I've just is this related because I don't drink caffeine?

Speaker 4 (01:12:44):
Yeah, like I drink so much caffeine. I'm insane.

Speaker 2 (01:12:47):
I think there's something like if like a chaotic house,
comfortable and chaos. And what I've learned from therapy is
that I'm either comfortable being really really depressed or really
really anxious and flying high and like they're not stopping
and that's that steadiness in between feels like death.

Speaker 4 (01:13:05):
Yeah, well I have that too though, like I'm dying slow. Yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:13:08):
My therapist said that I'm my most stressed when everything's
going well.

Speaker 4 (01:13:13):
Yes, well you want to keep it well.

Speaker 2 (01:13:15):
There's no reason why human beings should have ever felt
well and safe. It is not like when we used
to have to survive to live. No one, there's no comfort.
There was no like just basking and like vacationing. It
was always like you're either you know, being eaten or
you have to find a way to eat and survive
and your kids are dying and you're getting fucking raped.
It's like it was just fight or fly constantly. There

(01:13:38):
was never a moment in a cave person's life of
like I'm gonna chill.

Speaker 4 (01:13:43):
I love. I think even in like the last the
last like one hundred and thirty years are the only
time that's ever been really good.

Speaker 5 (01:13:52):
Ever, well, it depends if you were if you were
like in the aristocracy, were stumpy, you were just disgusting.
You definitely had all these weird STDs that like, but
you didn't know better than that, You didn't, but.

Speaker 4 (01:14:07):
They drove you insane, Like yes, like basically like a
king in the sixteen hundred, it's like had like I
had a syphilitic brain, yeah, and like it was still
living better than most people. Wow, but it's also insane.

Speaker 5 (01:14:22):
Three hundred years from now, people are going to look
back at our lives and be like, can you believe
that people died?

Speaker 4 (01:14:27):
Yeah, yeah, it's so weird.

Speaker 1 (01:14:30):
Well, now phones are destroying our lives.

Speaker 2 (01:14:32):
And I saw a thing TikTok that is probably not true,
but like phones are emitting radiation and like you should
not sleep with your phone next to your head, You
shouldn't have it even near your face. Now I'm like
holding my dog and like the phone will be next
to the dog, and I'm like, God, get it away,
Like so that's still that's true. I'm like going fucking
nuts about it.

Speaker 4 (01:14:52):
I think it's one.

Speaker 1 (01:14:53):
TikTok about it.

Speaker 2 (01:14:54):
It's ruined my life and it was some girl that
I'm sure I don't agree with anything else you believed.

Speaker 4 (01:15:00):
Listen, I'm so worried about that, finding out that we
were just lied to because it was easier to get
us all to use cell phones than like whatever the
like landlines. I'm worried about that. I'm worried about Wi Fi,
Like is it okay? Wi Fi? Yes? Let's like you know,
emitting over our heads at all times.

Speaker 3 (01:15:18):
Bluetooth the AirPods, like sending the Bluetooth waves to your god.

Speaker 5 (01:15:23):
Oh no, well we're there's no escaping and truly, but
it's better.

Speaker 4 (01:15:27):
Than getting technology.

Speaker 2 (01:15:29):
We're getting your like wires snagged on a door, like
on your ear.

Speaker 4 (01:15:32):
Pop getting pulled off.

Speaker 1 (01:15:34):
Yeah. More uncomfortable than a brain tumors.

Speaker 4 (01:15:38):
The phones too big for your pocket. Would you rather
be torn apart by wolves or get a brain tumor
from from watching like any video you want to watch?

Speaker 1 (01:15:49):
Tear my tumor out if.

Speaker 7 (01:15:51):
The want oolvate your body like how Brian neats a
big cat.

Speaker 1 (01:15:56):
Just everyone, it's just finished, all right, we gotta go.

Speaker 2 (01:16:04):
Thank you guys so much. This is such a fun
week of podcasting. Sean O'Connor, what's your.

Speaker 4 (01:16:08):
O'conns on all social media?

Speaker 2 (01:16:11):
Seanz s E A N O C O n z
on all social media. Brian Frangie, please go watch this
is your Country. That is the tim Dillon Netflix special
that Brian show ran and yeah, go watch more than
five minutes of it.

Speaker 4 (01:16:29):
Watch the whole thing.

Speaker 5 (01:16:31):
Wat it's on midnight, well two days ago, but tonight
really in real life?

Speaker 1 (01:16:38):
Hell yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:16:39):
Andrew Colin follow him, Listen to his podcast, The Podcast.

Speaker 4 (01:16:45):
With No No, Not that cool Andrew and co.

Speaker 7 (01:16:51):
On Instagram. Yeah, don't forget. I'm thinking about writing on
there again. It's like over there.

Speaker 9 (01:16:58):
Yeah, and I've thought about Fred's.

Speaker 2 (01:17:05):
And then I'm on tour a ton coming up Windsor,
Ontario this Friday, which is very much near Detroit.

Speaker 1 (01:17:13):
And then the following week is Syracu. No, that's not right.

Speaker 2 (01:17:19):
I'm gonna be yeah, Syracuse, got it right, Hershey, Pennsylvania.
And then the following week look for me. Oh, I'm
gonna be in Miami for Aerostoor and Andrews's wedding.

Speaker 1 (01:17:32):
Come on out for that, and then.

Speaker 2 (01:17:35):
And then Fort Lauderdale at the end of October Fort
Myers and and that'll be some fun shows. So go
check out my tour schedule Nikki glazer dot com slash tourz.
Also Oklahoma City where else we got going Tulsa, Oklahoma,
Just doing an Oklahoma to so many dates, so many

(01:17:58):
more air stores coming up.

Speaker 4 (01:18:00):
We're gonna go under. I'm ready. I'm thinking about what
air I'm gonna do.

Speaker 1 (01:18:05):
Yeah, oh yeah, you're gonna what are you gonna dress?

Speaker 9 (01:18:07):
As?

Speaker 4 (01:18:07):
Boys?

Speaker 6 (01:18:08):
Do it?

Speaker 1 (01:18:09):
Get a funny shirt or something. There's like, you know,
like it's me, Hi, I'm the boyfriend.

Speaker 4 (01:18:15):
It's me.

Speaker 2 (01:18:15):
It's like, you know, like swifty by peer pressure, you know,
that's where you can everyone has like funny. There's actually
a really cool shirt that is like you know, like
the fake swimsuit shirts that are like painted on, but
it's her like body suit.

Speaker 1 (01:18:31):
Or that's really I saw a guy wearing. It's so funny.
I'll send it to you, all right, That's what I do.

Speaker 4 (01:18:37):
Whatever.

Speaker 2 (01:18:37):
All right, we'll see out there. Don't be a bye.
The Nicky Glazer podcast is a production by Will Ferrell's
Big Money Players and iHeart Podcasts. Created and hosted by
Me Nicky Glazer, co hosted by Brian Frangie, Executive produced
by Will Ferrell, Hans Sonny and Noah Avior. Edited it
engineered by Lean and Loaf, Video production Mark Canton, and

(01:18:58):
music by Anya Marina. You can now watch full episodes
of The nicki Glazer Podcast on YouTube, follow at Nikki
Glazer Pod and subscribe to our channel

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