October 22, 2020 • 36 mins
“Playing hard to get” can be extremely subjective. One person’s “I think they’re playing hard to get” is another’s “I’m thinking about getting a restraining order, and changing all the locks in my house.” But isn’t there something kind of refreshing about sincerity and laying your feelings bare without pretense? On this episode of The Pleasure is Ours, Cody is joined by YouTuber and podcaster Emma Chamberlain (TIME Next 100 and one of the 25 Most Influential People on the Internet) to disprove and then tweak this bit of advice for the modern-era. Hint: There’s a way to not be a creep about it. Speaking of laying it all out there, Cody gets candid about the time a very famous rockstar’s daughter friendzoned him in public. And honestly? That’s some next level playing hard to get!
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
What's up, guys? Is Cody here and before we kick
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You don't have to have a condom on now to
listen to the show. By the way, just you know,
if you have sex, have you ever given someone like
a fake number in high school. I did there actually
hotline thing. That's so mean. I know a person who
(01:04):
doesn't like getting rejected. That's a horrible thing to do.
Am you have a trouble with life? Won't let me
give you some Hey? What's up? I'm Cody co and
welcome to the Pleasure Is Ours, the podcast in which
we examine some of the worst advice people hear their
whole lives and try to make it better. Today on
(01:27):
the show, we're gonna talk about the phrase always play
hard to get. This one is a complicated one because,
you know, playing hard to get in general can be
completely subjective. You know, I'm saying one person's I think
they're playing hard to get can be another person's I'm
thinking about getting a restraining order here to help me
pick apart this piece of advice. You know her from YouTube,
her podcast Anything Goes the Time One Next List, and
(01:49):
perhaps the fact that she's been named one of the
top twenty most influential people on the Internet. I'm talking,
of course, about my friend, the one and only, Emma Chamberlain. Welcome, Emma,
thanks for coming on the show. Thank you for having me.
This is not our first podcast together. Unfortunately, we did
one a long time ago, and I was like, I
mean unfortunately because when I watched that podcast again, Cody,
(02:12):
I want to jump off a bridge, just send my
body off the bridge, like it is the cringe eest
thing I've ever seen in myself because I was so
scared of you. But I'm no longer scared of you,
and I'm very excited. Thank you for having me back
after you having to deal with my you know, crazy,
Am I not scary anymore? I don't understand. No, No,
(02:32):
you think just because you're on the Time Next list
and you were named the most influential people on the
entirety of the Internet that all of a sudden you're
what you're Oh yeah, okay, do you want me to
just tell you you're so scary to me? And like, Cody,
you intimidate me. I was crying before we started. I
(02:53):
can do that. No. Actually, to be honest, there is
something intimidating about you in general, but I feel like
I've moved to pass. Yeah. I don't know what it is.
I don't know what it is, Cody. I am not
intimidated by a lot of people. Maybe it's the hair
that's exactly it, and that's scary for me, being somebody
who doesn't really have my hair situation figured out. Um,
it's scary to see you have it so figured out
(03:15):
and I feel like you know something I don't, and
I fucking hate it. So that's what it is. That
is what it is so ignoring because this is this
is a podcast. People listening can't see my hair. You
just have to trust it's fucking beautiful. I was excited
to do this with you because I know the first
podcast you said about of the words in that hour
or maybe it was like an hour and a half
or something like that, I didn't really have to say much,
(03:36):
which is a podcast host dream is to not say
anything and have the guests just take it away. And
so I'm wondering is today is going to be like
that too? You know? I feel like this is so
interesting because I looked back at it relatively recently in
our I mean, I couldn't watch more than about three
seconds of it. But when I get nervous, I don't
(03:58):
shut down. I do the opposite. I just word vomit.
And because I'm less nervous now I'm going to talk less,
which is weird because you think it'd be the opposite.
But I feel like we're going to have a nice
fifty fifty banter. I'm really hoping for that. Um, I
don't want to, you know, this is your thing, right,
I don't want to. I don't want to take over.
I know you feel free, No, I feel free. As
(04:21):
I said, I'm I'm trying to kick back and just
just enjoy it. You know. You know, like you you
host a podcast, do you have guests? Just just me?
Do you feel like when you're recording episodes of that podcast,
you're like you're like looking at the time and you're like, fuck,
is this good? And you're worried about filling it up
with great stuff. And then but then when you're a
guest on someone else's podcast, it's just a breeze. You're like, wait,
(04:42):
an hour's gone by already with a thousand percent. And
I don't know why. I think it's because when I
do it, I'm coming up with the concept. I'm like
in charge of all of that. But when somebody else
gets to ask the questions, it's a dream come true.
You don't have to think, you just you just go.
It's great that being said, let me ask you this.
I feel like we should all know this, But what
(05:03):
are some telltale signs someone is legitimately not into you
and not just playing hard to get right? You you
start seeing someone you're like and then they don't text
you for a while, and you're like, is this the
standard period of time where you're not supposed to text?
Or are they just dipping? Are they ghosts? I feel
like for me, I'm somebody I hate texting. First. I
(05:25):
hate it. Um. I almost never do it in the
beginning of relationships or anything. But I know that they're
not into it when a little bit of time goes
by and you make a little bit of effort and
they give nothing back. Because usually if somebody's playing hard
to get but you take a stab at it, they'll
like bite the line, you know what I'm saying. But
(05:47):
if they don't give you anything, I'm like, Okay, you
either are being an asshole or you're just not into it,
and I don't want to be a part of it.
I don't like games at all, Right, you don't like games? No? No,
what if it was the complete opposite. What if they
just sent you like they were like, I'm super fucking
into you. Blah blah blah. What's that Is that like
(06:07):
attractive or no? Because I feel like for me, that
is attractive. Like if someone shows their interest right away,
up front and it's just like unabashed about it, I'm
down for that. I want passion, you know what I'm saying.
I'm the same way. And so many people think that
that's like terrifying. And I can see that if the
person that's giving that attention is like somebody I'm not
(06:31):
into at all, then whatever. But if I even have
a little bit of interest and I'm getting that type
of attention, I'm hyped about it. It's a compliment to me.
I'm like, wow, they really care, Like that's great and rare.
I crave that. When somebody's playing hard to get I
get tired and insecure and scared, like I don't want
to have anything to do with it. So yeah, I'm like,
(06:54):
this just makes me feel bad. I don't know. I'm
very sensitive and that's like in those situations like rejection
to me from guys ruins me. Yeah, yeah, I mean
me too. I'm the same way. And I also think
it goes hand in hand with the fact that I'm
like an ego maniac. So when someone is validating that,
I'm like, yes, I wasn't wrong. I do fucking rule.
(07:16):
I knew I ruled. I've been telling myself that my
entire life, and this person now thinks I also rule,
and they're letting me know that, and so that's now.
That's like, uh, you know, it finishes the circle of yes,
my ego, you know. But when someone rejects me, I'm like, oh, wait,
was I wrong my whole life? Do I not do?
I not rule a thousand percent? And it's like, what
do they see that I don't see? Like, I feel
like I'm pretty great a thousand percent? I agree, and
(07:38):
my parents like, I'm cool. They've been telling me that
since I was a baby, you know. Yeah. Can I
tell you my the most clear, the most clearest sign
that I've ever received from someone that wasn't interested. Okay, hmm,
this is true. I went to a date function in
college with Bruce Springsteen's daughter and I got set up.
(08:01):
It was like a you know, she was like newly
single or something like that, and it was like a
fraternity function or something like that, and so someone set
me up with her. I've never met her before, but
I was kind of like I was nervous. She was
pretty out of my leak. But I don't even think
she knew what I looked like. I think she's just like,
I need a fucking date. And this person said they'll
come with me. So great, But I kind of thought
maybe there's still a shot, you know, maybe i'll charm
(08:24):
her a little bit. I'll say a couple of jokes
and she'll be into it, you know. And so we
go to this date function, and then during dinner or
something like that, just like leaves. And then later it
turns into like a you know, like a club night
or whatever. And then I look on the dance floor
and she's making out with this like very tall dude
with very long hair, similar to mine right now, and
(08:46):
and so I thought, yeah, that's I don't think she's
playing hard to get right there. I think that is
legitimately she has no interesting to me at all, and
she actually likes the dude that she's making out with.
Probably see this has happened to me as well, like
almost the same situation. You know, I thought I didn't
really like this guy at all, Like it was more
just like he's cool, whatever, we're talking whatever, and it
(09:07):
was the same thing. Like there was a party and
I was there. He invited me and I was like cool, whatever,
and exact same thing happened. And honestly, I didn't care
because I didn't care about him. But I was like, fuck,
I don't know. That's the worst look at us, just
getting fucking rejected, rejected. It sucks. We're too We're like,
(09:32):
we're too cool. We're too fucking cool. They it makes
him feel bad about themselves. So they have to go
I have to go make out with like the opposite
of each of us. That's always the worst feeling too,
and it's like the opposite of what you are, Like
that's the worst stab. Like this girl was so the
opposite of me, and so it was just like God,
it's like I can't even be that if I wanted,
(09:52):
she wasn't on the list more like you know, I
was brunette. She was want. But you know what I mean,
the dude, the dude that she was making out with,
it was like a like he's like a lax bro.
He's tall, Like you know, I don't I don't know
where he's from. And I mean, I think he's a
nice guy, but I mean he's just, you know, opposite
(10:13):
of me at the time. Now, I do have kind
of laxy hair. You kind of are a lax bro
right now. You're giving me that. I know, I keep
talking about the hair, but I'm like staring at myself
in the zoom call. I can't help it. You know,
it's the eagle thing again. No, I'm this. I literally
pined myself on zooms and I fucking hope that nobody
can see that. Like you, like you don't go to
(10:36):
gallery view, you go to just the one and it's
just you. I'm yeah, and I'm like looking to be
like oh, and I mean, is I can still hear
them like ship's getting done. It's just I don't I
don't know. I don't want to be all in their business. Also,
it's like I do have a phobia of like having
some sort of embarrassing like booger, Like aren't pit sweat
(10:58):
stain like I in any scenario, But on zoom, I
feel like it's amplified and somebody could screenshot and got
to be careful. Oh yeah, yeah, you could go yeah yeah,
they could screen record and then you could go viral
on barstool or whatever. Um, I funny or something. Here,
imagine your business someone you're on a business call with
exposes you for a fucking armpit booger. Is that what
(11:19):
you said? I said a booger or armt pit stain,
But you know what I mean. No, I don't know
why I have that. I also constantly feel like I'm
being watched, so which is a story for another day.
But that's why I'm always like looking in a mirror.
I I will never let one eyebrow hair be out
of place. Do you know what I'm saying? Do you
feel like you're being watched? Okay, that's a thing. No
(11:41):
I do. Okay, good, I do. But I don't care
about what I look like. Okay. So, like, if someone's
like peeping in here right now, I'm not gonna like
fix myself for them. They can see the shitty side
of me, you know, well, right, they don't deserve the
put together code because they're fucking in your privacy and
they're keeping Tom and they're a little bit creepy. Anyways,
(12:03):
you know right now, that makes sense, that's very true.
Have you ever purposely left someone on red, like even
like a potential like someone that you might have been
interested in or maybe not. Have you a ghosted anyone?
Have you ever? You know, just straight up given someone
like a fake number, just oh yeah, I okay, So
I've definitely given a fake number. I don't know. I
(12:25):
used to have fun with that in high school. I
did the rejection hotline thing, where like you give them
this fake number and then if they call it or
text it, it sends something back and it's like you
were sent the rejection hotline, like this person doesn't like you.
So I used to do that's the thing. Yeah, it
was fucking epic in high school. It was so fun.
So I used to do that. That's so mean. I
(12:47):
know a person who was not like getting rejected. That's
a horrible that's a horrible thing to do. No, it
was evil, but luckily like it was like all my
friends student. So I think morally I didn't realize that
that's fucking eve you've been rejected. You have too many
armpit boogers. Literally, I like, so sad. I have definitely
(13:07):
left people on Red. My fucked up head, right, my
brain will be like if I'm in kind of a
talking stage, I'll be like, I'll leave someone on Red
so that the powers in my hands, and then I
can text again later if I want or not, And
then if they want to talk more, they have to
double text. And I love that. I love the feeling
(13:30):
and I love the power. I also, I mean, sometimes
I just genuinely don't want to talk to somebody and
I'll leave them on red I don't like. I mean,
I try to be nice, but if it's not for me,
I mean, I'm I'll just ghost. I definitely have ghosted
a few times. Listen, I think ghosting is fine. People.
There's such a weird stigma around ghosting. It's like, dude,
(13:51):
how easy it is in modern times for us to
communicate with one another. You know the fact that you
can just re act to someone's story with a fucking
emoji with a picture that requires zero percent thought? Right,
How easy it is for us to do these sort
of things. What's the difference between replying to someone's story
(14:13):
with an emoji and just not saying shit? Oh yeah?
And I mean, it's actually crazy the weight that it holds,
Like I have started so many conversations with guys from
something like that, especially in high school, Like if a
dude would slide up on my Snapchat story and like
comment on it, like that's how every conversation would start,
(14:35):
and then they're I mean, like we're talking about public flirting.
Then there's um, you know what negging is like when
you negging is like when you purposely make fun of
someone when you're trying to court them. So you but
it's like bordering on me in a little bit, Like
you kind of pick on their appearance and you make
them feel like ship so that they crave your approval.
That's what negging is. What do you think of that?
(14:56):
You know? That's actually so interesting because I've never thought
about the psycholog g of it and the fact that
like that's such a good point, like that's why people
do that, so that when you get the approval, you're
like oh yeah, and like whatever, that's fucked to me
kind of. But you know, I think it's actually fun
to a certain extent. I participate. I think I pick
(15:18):
on people that I like to a certain a lot.
I mean not a lot, but I'm always very picky
about it and careful about it. And it's always things
that are very surface level and have no potential to
hurt in any way. It's still you know what I mean,
personally I'm I overthink everything, and I think every joke
(15:38):
has an element of real to it. So if somebody
says like something mean, that's like I will literally go
home and be like, wait a minute, even though it's
a joke, like they thought about that for kind of
a long time and and like that's the first thing
that came to their mind, which means that it's probably true,
so like you know, and then it gets in my head.
But that when people do it to me, but when
(16:01):
I do it to them. I when I was younger,
I was pretty fucked up. I'd be fully mean to
feel like your shorts are fucking ugly, they are so
and you suck at basketball, you're so dumb, and the
teacher hates you and you're stupid. But now it's like, okay,
you know what, I'm not trying to like hurt this
man's feelings. Yeah, but that's what I'm saying. You can
do it playfully, which is great, But nagging, I feel
(16:22):
like means more like like, oh, you know, by the
way your breath smells like ass, And then oh no,
I fucking hate that because how does okay, how are
you supposed to react to that by wanting them more,
I guess, and that's that that's their goal. Sometimes with nay,
like with nagging or whatever, it's hard to laugh it
off when you're receiving and it's like because it's like,
(16:44):
unless it's genuinely funny, it's sometimes it's just mean. And
then it's like you have to like brush it off
and like laugh like it was funny so it's not awkward,
But then you're like fake laughing about it, and that's
just miserable. I hate that, you know what I mean? Yeah,
maybe I should have told Bruce Springsteen's daughter that her
her dad's songs suck ass. You know your dad fucking
(17:06):
he's so lame, dude, I hate your dad. Um, Okay,
let me ask you a question. Is gen Z? You're
gen Z? I'm like right on the cusp, are you?
I think because I'm almost twenty, I'm pretty sure that's
like solidly gen Z. Okay, do you know what, Cody?
I hate being gen Z. So let's just let's just
(17:28):
say I'm on the cus far. But one above it
is millennial. You're definitely not a millennial. Oh. I don't
want to be that either. Fuck? What's wrong with that?
I want to be a senior citizen or something. I
feel like they're chill as fuck. Is gen Z out
there playing hard to get? Like they? I feel like
they approach everything better than millennials because they just grew
up ingrained with this massive communication web. Do they play
(17:49):
hard to get or they're they just like, yeah, I'm
end you, let's do it, you know, I honestly think
it depends. Well. It's actually interesting because I've talked to
a millennial and a gen Z and multiple gen Z,
multiple of each, and there is a difference. Actually, I
feel like millennials are more straight up. They're just like
and maybe it's because they're older, but I feel like
(18:10):
they play less games to be honest, at least from
my experience, whereas gen Z is like all over the place,
they're cheating, they're lying, they care one day, they don't care.
The next day. They aren't even trying to play hard
to get. They more just don't give a fuck. I
feel like nobody in my generation gives a fuck or
has any feeling. Dating in this age group is so
(18:35):
miserable because everybody is nobody wants to commit. Everybody's like
all over the place they're ghosting you one day, then
they're back the next. There's no consistency. It's a mess. Yeah.
I don't envy. I don't envy you, you know, but
I'm talk to you about this because you are a
(18:55):
genuine person and people see that that's one of the
reasons why you're so successful. And I feel like that
also will go far for you in the dating world.
I've done actually, I mean I've done bad, but I
also have done I've had good luck, like really like
I I've been able to find ways to like look
in other kind of not my direct space, do you
(19:17):
know what I mean, Like, not other YouTubers, not other
social media people. I try to go out of that now.
And I feel like that's worked so much better because
nobody really cares when they're not in it here. Like
if you're talking to let's say, like an actor, they're
not going to care about YouTube as much. They just
(19:39):
don't care. So then it's like it's like you got
it's there's not that superficial element. And to be honest,
like I'm not that into movies, so like if I
am talking to and I'm not talking to an actor,
but if I was, like then it's fine, Like I
genuinely don't watch movies, so I don't give a funk
what movie you've been Like, Babe, man, being on set
was so hard. Today craft service has really sucked. You're like,
(20:00):
I don't give a ship. I have a brand deal
to fucking take care of. All right. Literally, I'm like,
my sea geek is doing three hours. Shut the funk up. Listen,
We're gonna take a quick break. But when we come back,
me and Emma are gonna tweak the advice in real time.
And by that, I mean we're gonna fix it, just
so we know, because we just talked about it's complicated.
(20:22):
So let's figure out. Let's let's iron out the wrinkles here,
Let's figure out how to how to fix this piece
of advice. Listen. As a guy, I talk about male
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(20:43):
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Target dot com. Okay, here's my best attempt at fixing
this one. Don't play hard to get. Don't play easy
to get, play fun to get that okay, right, There's
(22:28):
zero shame in showing someone that you're interested in them
from the get go. But when in doubt go buy
the famous acronym dB A f C. Don't be a
fucking creed. That's also true death love that. What I'm
saying is show show interest, but do it with tact right.
Don't like in comment on every picture. Don't reach out
(22:49):
consecutive times without a response. You know trip, I'm talking quadruple,
quintuple text. Don't buy them a diamond necklace after your
first Macha date. Um, the chase can be one of
the best parts of a new thing, right, so make
it fun, keep it light. Sure you might have visions
of dropping your future children off at college with the
person at your side after meeting them initially. But just
(23:10):
play a cool and remember de bath Bath. Is there
anything you'd like to add to that? I mean, the
way you put it was fucking perfect. But I also
think the other thing is I had to learn this
the hard way. You will embarrass yourself if you don't
just follow your fucking instinct. If you're like, oh, I
(23:30):
need to comment on every photo so that they know that, No,
just do it when it makes sense. Don't strategize anything.
It's make it simple. Have fun and the bath, Bath,
have fun and bath. There are people with shitty instincts,
though I don't know that's a good point. Like some
people their instinct is to literally text five thousand times
(23:52):
in a row, and I don't funk with anyone like that,
and I refuse to associate with them. So that's you
hold on. Maybe if they follow that instinct, then they'll
find someone who likes to be texted five thousand times
in a row, and actually it works out. That's honestly,
I think that there's people that like that. When I
really like a guy, to be honest, they could text
(24:12):
me fifty times, and I if I genuinely really like them,
and I would um fifties a lot. But if I
get like double texted though by a guy that I like,
I love it. It makes me feel good. Yeah. No,
I agree. We talked at the beginning, but like, I
want to see the passion that me and Kelsey right
off the bat were like. I was unabashed about it.
I was like, I said that we had our first
(24:32):
date and night. On the first date, I said, I
have tickets to a concert tomorrow. Do you want to
come to the concert? And we did a we did
a second date the very next day, and so that
I could have you know, played a cool a little bit.
But what's that happened? You know, we both knew. I
think when it's a genuine connection, you don't have to
play those games. I really do. Yeah, yeah, I think
(24:52):
that's true. I think that's definitely true. What's the worst
advice you've ever received in general or with dating? Okay,
you know what, I would say the worst advice and
this actually kind of does relate to this topic, and
I think it might just be because that's on my mind,
But I think the worst advice would kind of be
(25:15):
to play hard to get because I remember in one
relationship when I was way younger, I did that. I
was playing hard to get with this guy that I
genuinely really liked, and this fits way too perfectly with it,
but it really is on my brain. It I just
thought about it. I mean, like me not giving affection
in a relationship and playing hard to get in a
relationship caused of the breakup because this guy thought I
(25:37):
hated him, but I was always like, well, I want
him to like me and so, and it ruined a relationship,
which honestly, I'm so glad I got ruined because that
ship was not good anyway. But like at the time,
I was like, I totally funked this up because I
literally would never text him first, like never, whatever, and
that's fucked. I feel like that is the classic plot
(25:58):
line of like every high school romance movie is someone
tells the kid who's interested in the girl or whatever
to be a dick play hard to get, and then
the girl is always like, well, what the fund this
guy clearly doesn't isn't into it, and then later he's like, no,
I was, I'm sorry. I just my friend told me
to be an asshole. That is exactly what fucking happened
(26:19):
to me. So and that's that was bad advice. I mean,
to be honest, I think the reason why I'm struggling
with this question is because half the time when people
give me advice, I in one ear out the other.
You know what I mean. I I really am the
type of person that needs to touch the stove to
believe that it's hot. And so yeah, I'm the same way.
(26:40):
I just like somebody could give me the best advice
and be like, m that's super unfortunate because I'm gonna
go do exactly what you told me not to do.
I wish I was better at listening to advice from people,
like when I know in my gut that it's real,
because I'm the same way someone tells me the stove
is hot and I and I feel in my gut
that they're right, which a lot of the times I
(27:01):
do someone gives me advice and I respect them and
I know they're probably they're probably spitting truth at me.
I'll still go touch the fucking thing same and it's
because I have to know. Yeah, And that's like the
I learned the hard way, you know. I think it's good.
I don't think that that's a bad thing necessarily. I
think there's growth in that, a lot of growth in that. Okay,
how would you feel about doing the lightning round I'm
(27:24):
gonna get I'm gonna name two people of note, and
you have to tell me who you'd rather take advice from.
In this scenario, you have to take advice from one
of them, and you have to tell me why you're
choosing one over the other. Okay, perfect, Jaden Smith or
Tyler the Creator. Tyler the Creator because I just feel
like he's so funny that he would give me advice.
That would Okay. Sometimes when people give you advice, they're
(27:47):
like so fucking annoying about it and so preachy about it, right,
and I don't like that. And I feel like Tyler
would give you advice in a funny way. And I
absorbed information better when it makes me laugh, and I
think he would really do that. Words. I feel like
Jaden Smith might be a little bit more on the
preachier side of things, and I think that that would
(28:09):
make me feel stupid and bad about myself. And I
can tell because of all of his capital letters in
every Instagram caption before every word. It shows me that
he knows something I don't. That intimidates me. I don't
even want to know what his brain looks like inside
his captains and capital letters. Yeah, he like. I remember
one time I stalked him, like a few months ago
because I found some songs by him that I liked
(28:30):
and I never listened. And then I look at his
Instagram and it's like every first letter of every word
was capital and I was like, this man is like
he got another eye open somewhere that I don't because like,
how do you who? What's going on? Um? Anyway, But
that's how he gives advice to exactly, and that's too
much letters. Literally, No, No, it's the first letter of
(28:56):
every word. So it's not the full word that I
hate that, that's what he does. Hate that. Why do
people do that? I don't know it does. It can't
seem a little like it's the fucking name of a
restaurant or some ship. You don't it's not a you know,
proper noun or whatever the fuck. It's also exhausting to type,
like it's so genuinely tying to type something like that. Yeah, okay,
(29:18):
Logan Paul or Bill Night the science guy. Do you know,
Oh my god, yeah, I would say Bill Night just
because I don't know that that was definitely a hard one. Um. Actually,
I well, okay, you know that Bill Night would have
like the sweetest, fucking, most endearing advice ever. Although I'm
(29:43):
going to be real with you, I would love to
see what kind of advice Logan would give, because I
I don't know what if he just blew us out
of the water and gave us some sort of crazy
you know deep you know, I don't know. I bet
you his advice would just be like, just go for it,
(30:04):
just do it. Just that's that's that's very true. There's
nothing wrong with that. I just think that's that's what
he's like. It's also like everything he's done has been successful,
so it's kind of hard for him not to be like,
just try and do a lot of push ups. Yeah,
and punch people and you got this, let's go. Yeah. No,
Bill may are on a Grande or a Grande Starbucks
(30:25):
pumpkin spice latte. You know, I'm gonna go with the
pumpkin spice latte because I uh, well, actually it's just
a Grande and it was a nt different, so I'm
actually gonna go with Ariana Grande. Okay, Leonardo DiCaprio or me,
Cody co I have this weird Okay, listen, Leonardo DiCaprio
is probably a great guy. Okay, I don't know. I
(30:48):
don't think he's listening. I think you can, you can
be honest. I know, I just I really sorry, Leo.
I know that you I know you fucking tracked me
down on every platform. Relax, but um, did you no? You? No?
He Okay, he just scares the ship out of me,
and I feel like his advice would also be terrible considering. Okay,
(31:11):
I have like a fear of people who maybe kind
of peaked, like he definitely peaked during Titanic, right, Okay,
I mean, okay, Well he peeked at this young age,
and now I feel like he's jaded and because he
was a heart throb, and like you know, I have
a fear of heart throbs. I think that they're evil
(31:33):
and I think that like the women love them too
much and now they're assholes. And I think his advice
would be shitty. Cody, you are a great guy, and
I stand by that. I would like your advice instead.
You have a you have a heart throb. Yeah, no, really,
I think the most like heart throbs, Like, I mean,
I loved magcon back and like that's terrifying to me. Now,
(31:53):
you know, it's scary to see everything. All right, we've
so we've talked about the worst advice you've received. But
before you take off, what is the worst advice that
you've ever given someone? No, here's the bad advice that
I've given. This happened recently, and I have this bad
habit where I'm always the type to be like, you know,
(32:16):
just say how you're feeling, do whatever you want, go
crazy whatever. I knew that this guy that my friend
was talking to was a douche bag, but she wanted
to hang out with him. So I told her to
ask him to hang out and I eat, knowing deep
down that he might be a dick about it and
it might hurt her feelings, but she wanted to. So
(32:36):
I was like, you know what, doing right? And it
went like completely wrong. I mean like it was just
like every time I tell somebody, I if I read
somebody's character, like let's say it's a dude for my
friend or whatever, and like even if they're an asshole,
I'll just tell people. I almost tell people to like
touch the stove. That's what I'm trying to say. I
(32:58):
will like push people in maybe the wrong direction, knowing
that they're gonna possibly get hurt, but it's harmless because
I know that they're going to learn something from it. That's,
in my opinion, bad advice because I'm almost on purpose
giving them bad advice. Yeah, but that's do you know
what I mean? Yeah, but then it ends up being
good advice. I know you're does that good at give
(33:19):
me advice. You can't come up with bad advice. Bad
advice is disguised as good advice. Holy sh it. That
makes me look like such a I don't know, I
literally care a profit, wasn't. I get a lot of
cameos from people that are like, oh, Mi'm turning twenty,
give me some advice. Or I'm graduating college, give me
(33:40):
some advice, And I never know what to say. But
now I'm going to say, touch the stove. Touch the stove.
I'm gonna get that tatted on me somewhere, even if
it's glowing red, even if it's touch it, but just
not like maybe metaphorically though, so they're like Honestly, I
feel like somebody if I got a cameo from you
and you told me to touch to stove, I would
(34:01):
unfortunately probably do it and just be like Cody of course.
So I yeah, as long as they know it's a metaphor,
you know, actually no, don't, don't tell them. If they're
dumb enough to do it, then that's their loss. If
we've learned anything from this episode, it's take your advice,
not mine. I think that's I think that's what we've learned.
And de Bath all right, I think that I'll do
(34:25):
it for this episode. Um, I want to thank Emma
Chamberlain so much for joining us. I think we solved
another one here, and I mean, I know you've only
been on one episode, but if we're keeping track, I
think I'm four for four at this point, which is
huge for me. And I couldn't have kept a street
going without U, Emma, So I appreciate you being here.
Is there anything that you want to plug right now?
(34:47):
My podcast? Well, first, thank you, this was my pleasure
and U. My podcast is called Anything Goes and my
name's Emma Chamberlain. You can find me everywhere under that name.
And that's about it perfect, all right, thanks Cody, Yeah,
thank you later piece. Amen, you have in trouble with life,
(35:12):
well let me give you some of funs. The Pleasure
Is Ours is a production of I Heart Radio and
Trojan Brand hosted by me Cody Co. The podcast is
executive produced by Ethan Fixel, produced and written by Jonathan Grimm,
written by David Doot and engineered, edited and mixed by
Matt Stillo. Our theme song was composed by me Cody
(35:32):
Co with additional music by Brad Kemp at Second Bedroom Studio.
If you haven't already subscribed, rated, or reviewed The Pleasure
As Ours, please do so on the I Heart Radio app,
Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Baby, thanks
again for tuning into The Pleasure as Ours presented by
Trojan Brand Condoms. That's a wrap for our episode, and
(35:55):
also you should be wrapping it up in the bedroom.
I'm talking, of course about your heinous You know, when
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So pick up a box of Trojan condoms wherever you
get your condoms, and maybe even a second box that
you've been wanting to try out. Look at you, you
fucking sex lord. Go for it, buddy, See you next time.
What's up, guys? Is Cody here and before we kick
off the show, I want to talk real quick about
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You don't have to have a condom on now to
listen to the show. By the way, just you know,
if you have sex, have you ever given someone like
a fake number in high school. I did there actually
hotline thing. That's so mean. I know a person who
(01:04):
doesn't like getting rejected. That's a horrible thing to do.
Am you have a trouble with life? Won't let me
give you some Hey? What's up? I'm Cody co and
welcome to the Pleasure Is Ours, the podcast in which
we examine some of the worst advice people hear their
whole lives and try to make it better. Today on
(01:27):
the show, we're gonna talk about the phrase always play
hard to get. This one is a complicated one because,
you know, playing hard to get in general can be
completely subjective. You know, I'm saying one person's I think
they're playing hard to get can be another person's I'm
thinking about getting a restraining order here to help me
pick apart this piece of advice. You know her from YouTube,
her podcast Anything Goes the Time One Next List, and
(01:49):
perhaps the fact that she's been named one of the
top twenty most influential people on the Internet. I'm talking,
of course, about my friend, the one and only, Emma Chamberlain. Welcome, Emma,
thanks for coming on the show. Thank you for having me.
This is not our first podcast together. Unfortunately, we did
one a long time ago, and I was like, I
mean unfortunately because when I watched that podcast again, Cody,
(02:12):
I want to jump off a bridge, just send my
body off the bridge, like it is the cringe eest
thing I've ever seen in myself because I was so
scared of you. But I'm no longer scared of you,
and I'm very excited. Thank you for having me back
after you having to deal with my you know, crazy,
Am I not scary anymore? I don't understand. No, No,
(02:32):
you think just because you're on the Time Next list
and you were named the most influential people on the
entirety of the Internet that all of a sudden you're
what you're Oh yeah, okay, do you want me to
just tell you you're so scary to me? And like, Cody,
you intimidate me. I was crying before we started. I
(02:53):
can do that. No. Actually, to be honest, there is
something intimidating about you in general, but I feel like
I've moved to pass. Yeah. I don't know what it is.
I don't know what it is, Cody. I am not
intimidated by a lot of people. Maybe it's the hair
that's exactly it, and that's scary for me, being somebody
who doesn't really have my hair situation figured out. Um,
it's scary to see you have it so figured out
(03:15):
and I feel like you know something I don't, and
I fucking hate it. So that's what it is. That
is what it is so ignoring because this is this
is a podcast. People listening can't see my hair. You
just have to trust it's fucking beautiful. I was excited
to do this with you because I know the first
podcast you said about of the words in that hour
or maybe it was like an hour and a half
or something like that, I didn't really have to say much,
(03:36):
which is a podcast host dream is to not say
anything and have the guests just take it away. And
so I'm wondering is today is going to be like
that too? You know? I feel like this is so
interesting because I looked back at it relatively recently in
our I mean, I couldn't watch more than about three
seconds of it. But when I get nervous, I don't
(03:58):
shut down. I do the opposite. I just word vomit.
And because I'm less nervous now I'm going to talk less,
which is weird because you think it'd be the opposite.
But I feel like we're going to have a nice
fifty fifty banter. I'm really hoping for that. Um, I
don't want to, you know, this is your thing, right,
I don't want to. I don't want to take over.
I know you feel free, No, I feel free. As
(04:21):
I said, I'm I'm trying to kick back and just
just enjoy it. You know. You know, like you you
host a podcast, do you have guests? Just just me?
Do you feel like when you're recording episodes of that podcast,
you're like you're like looking at the time and you're like, fuck,
is this good? And you're worried about filling it up
with great stuff. And then but then when you're a
guest on someone else's podcast, it's just a breeze. You're like, wait,
(04:42):
an hour's gone by already with a thousand percent. And
I don't know why. I think it's because when I
do it, I'm coming up with the concept. I'm like
in charge of all of that. But when somebody else
gets to ask the questions, it's a dream come true.
You don't have to think, you just you just go.
It's great that being said, let me ask you this.
I feel like we should all know this, But what
(05:03):
are some telltale signs someone is legitimately not into you
and not just playing hard to get right? You you
start seeing someone you're like and then they don't text
you for a while, and you're like, is this the
standard period of time where you're not supposed to text?
Or are they just dipping? Are they ghosts? I feel
like for me, I'm somebody I hate texting. First. I
(05:25):
hate it. Um. I almost never do it in the
beginning of relationships or anything. But I know that they're
not into it when a little bit of time goes
by and you make a little bit of effort and
they give nothing back. Because usually if somebody's playing hard
to get but you take a stab at it, they'll
like bite the line, you know what I'm saying. But
(05:47):
if they don't give you anything, I'm like, Okay, you
either are being an asshole or you're just not into it,
and I don't want to be a part of it.
I don't like games at all, Right, you don't like games? No? No,
what if it was the complete opposite. What if they
just sent you like they were like, I'm super fucking
into you. Blah blah blah. What's that Is that like
(06:07):
attractive or no? Because I feel like for me, that
is attractive. Like if someone shows their interest right away,
up front and it's just like unabashed about it, I'm
down for that. I want passion, you know what I'm saying.
I'm the same way. And so many people think that
that's like terrifying. And I can see that if the
person that's giving that attention is like somebody I'm not
(06:31):
into at all, then whatever. But if I even have
a little bit of interest and I'm getting that type
of attention, I'm hyped about it. It's a compliment to me.
I'm like, wow, they really care, Like that's great and rare.
I crave that. When somebody's playing hard to get I
get tired and insecure and scared, like I don't want
to have anything to do with it. So yeah, I'm like,
(06:54):
this just makes me feel bad. I don't know. I'm
very sensitive and that's like in those situations like rejection
to me from guys ruins me. Yeah, yeah, I mean
me too. I'm the same way. And I also think
it goes hand in hand with the fact that I'm
like an ego maniac. So when someone is validating that,
I'm like, yes, I wasn't wrong. I do fucking rule.
(07:16):
I knew I ruled. I've been telling myself that my
entire life, and this person now thinks I also rule,
and they're letting me know that, and so that's now.
That's like, uh, you know, it finishes the circle of yes,
my ego, you know. But when someone rejects me, I'm like, oh, wait,
was I wrong my whole life? Do I not do?
I not rule a thousand percent? And it's like, what
do they see that I don't see? Like, I feel
like I'm pretty great a thousand percent? I agree, and
(07:38):
my parents like, I'm cool. They've been telling me that
since I was a baby, you know. Yeah. Can I
tell you my the most clear, the most clearest sign
that I've ever received from someone that wasn't interested. Okay, hmm,
this is true. I went to a date function in
college with Bruce Springsteen's daughter and I got set up.
(08:01):
It was like a you know, she was like newly
single or something like that, and it was like a
fraternity function or something like that, and so someone set
me up with her. I've never met her before, but
I was kind of like I was nervous. She was
pretty out of my leak. But I don't even think
she knew what I looked like. I think she's just like,
I need a fucking date. And this person said they'll
come with me. So great, But I kind of thought
maybe there's still a shot, you know, maybe i'll charm
(08:24):
her a little bit. I'll say a couple of jokes
and she'll be into it, you know. And so we
go to this date function, and then during dinner or
something like that, just like leaves. And then later it
turns into like a you know, like a club night
or whatever. And then I look on the dance floor
and she's making out with this like very tall dude
with very long hair, similar to mine right now, and
(08:46):
and so I thought, yeah, that's I don't think she's
playing hard to get right there. I think that is
legitimately she has no interesting to me at all, and
she actually likes the dude that she's making out with.
Probably see this has happened to me as well, like
almost the same situation. You know, I thought I didn't
really like this guy at all, Like it was more
just like he's cool, whatever, we're talking whatever, and it
(09:07):
was the same thing. Like there was a party and
I was there. He invited me and I was like cool, whatever,
and exact same thing happened. And honestly, I didn't care
because I didn't care about him. But I was like, fuck,
I don't know. That's the worst look at us, just
getting fucking rejected, rejected. It sucks. We're too We're like,
(09:32):
we're too cool. We're too fucking cool. They it makes
him feel bad about themselves. So they have to go
I have to go make out with like the opposite
of each of us. That's always the worst feeling too,
and it's like the opposite of what you are, Like
that's the worst stab. Like this girl was so the
opposite of me, and so it was just like God,
it's like I can't even be that if I wanted,
(09:52):
she wasn't on the list more like you know, I
was brunette. She was want. But you know what I mean,
the dude, the dude that she was making out with,
it was like a like he's like a lax bro.
He's tall, Like you know, I don't I don't know
where he's from. And I mean, I think he's a
nice guy, but I mean he's just, you know, opposite
(10:13):
of me at the time. Now, I do have kind
of laxy hair. You kind of are a lax bro
right now. You're giving me that. I know, I keep
talking about the hair, but I'm like staring at myself
in the zoom call. I can't help it. You know,
it's the eagle thing again. No, I'm this. I literally
pined myself on zooms and I fucking hope that nobody
can see that. Like you, like you don't go to
(10:36):
gallery view, you go to just the one and it's
just you. I'm yeah, and I'm like looking to be
like oh, and I mean, is I can still hear
them like ship's getting done. It's just I don't I
don't know. I don't want to be all in their business. Also,
it's like I do have a phobia of like having
some sort of embarrassing like booger, Like aren't pit sweat
(10:58):
stain like I in any scenario, But on zoom, I
feel like it's amplified and somebody could screenshot and got
to be careful. Oh yeah, yeah, you could go yeah yeah,
they could screen record and then you could go viral
on barstool or whatever. Um, I funny or something. Here,
imagine your business someone you're on a business call with
exposes you for a fucking armpit booger. Is that what
(11:19):
you said? I said a booger or armt pit stain,
But you know what I mean. No, I don't know
why I have that. I also constantly feel like I'm
being watched, so which is a story for another day.
But that's why I'm always like looking in a mirror.
I I will never let one eyebrow hair be out
of place. Do you know what I'm saying? Do you
feel like you're being watched? Okay, that's a thing. No
(11:41):
I do. Okay, good, I do. But I don't care
about what I look like. Okay. So, like, if someone's
like peeping in here right now, I'm not gonna like
fix myself for them. They can see the shitty side
of me, you know, well, right, they don't deserve the
put together code because they're fucking in your privacy and
they're keeping Tom and they're a little bit creepy. Anyways,
(12:03):
you know right now, that makes sense, that's very true.
Have you ever purposely left someone on red, like even
like a potential like someone that you might have been
interested in or maybe not. Have you a ghosted anyone?
Have you ever? You know, just straight up given someone
like a fake number, just oh yeah, I okay, So
I've definitely given a fake number. I don't know. I
(12:25):
used to have fun with that in high school. I
did the rejection hotline thing, where like you give them
this fake number and then if they call it or
text it, it sends something back and it's like you
were sent the rejection hotline, like this person doesn't like you.
So I used to do that's the thing. Yeah, it
was fucking epic in high school. It was so fun.
So I used to do that. That's so mean. I
(12:47):
know a person who was not like getting rejected. That's
a horrible that's a horrible thing to do. No, it
was evil, but luckily like it was like all my
friends student. So I think morally I didn't realize that
that's fucking eve you've been rejected. You have too many
armpit boogers. Literally, I like, so sad. I have definitely
(13:07):
left people on Red. My fucked up head, right, my
brain will be like if I'm in kind of a
talking stage, I'll be like, I'll leave someone on Red
so that the powers in my hands, and then I
can text again later if I want or not, And
then if they want to talk more, they have to
double text. And I love that. I love the feeling
(13:30):
and I love the power. I also, I mean, sometimes
I just genuinely don't want to talk to somebody and
I'll leave them on red I don't like. I mean,
I try to be nice, but if it's not for me,
I mean, I'm I'll just ghost. I definitely have ghosted
a few times. Listen, I think ghosting is fine. People.
There's such a weird stigma around ghosting. It's like, dude,
(13:51):
how easy it is in modern times for us to
communicate with one another. You know the fact that you
can just re act to someone's story with a fucking
emoji with a picture that requires zero percent thought? Right,
How easy it is for us to do these sort
of things. What's the difference between replying to someone's story
(14:13):
with an emoji and just not saying shit? Oh yeah?
And I mean, it's actually crazy the weight that it holds,
Like I have started so many conversations with guys from
something like that, especially in high school, Like if a
dude would slide up on my Snapchat story and like
comment on it, like that's how every conversation would start,
(14:35):
and then they're I mean, like we're talking about public flirting.
Then there's um, you know what negging is like when
you negging is like when you purposely make fun of
someone when you're trying to court them. So you but
it's like bordering on me in a little bit, Like
you kind of pick on their appearance and you make
them feel like ship so that they crave your approval.
That's what negging is. What do you think of that?
(14:56):
You know? That's actually so interesting because I've never thought
about the psycholog g of it and the fact that
like that's such a good point, like that's why people
do that, so that when you get the approval, you're
like oh yeah, and like whatever, that's fucked to me
kind of. But you know, I think it's actually fun
to a certain extent. I participate. I think I pick
(15:18):
on people that I like to a certain a lot.
I mean not a lot, but I'm always very picky
about it and careful about it. And it's always things
that are very surface level and have no potential to
hurt in any way. It's still you know what I mean,
personally I'm I overthink everything, and I think every joke
(15:38):
has an element of real to it. So if somebody
says like something mean, that's like I will literally go
home and be like, wait a minute, even though it's
a joke, like they thought about that for kind of
a long time and and like that's the first thing
that came to their mind, which means that it's probably true,
so like you know, and then it gets in my head.
But that when people do it to me, but when
(16:01):
I do it to them. I when I was younger,
I was pretty fucked up. I'd be fully mean to
feel like your shorts are fucking ugly, they are so
and you suck at basketball, you're so dumb, and the
teacher hates you and you're stupid. But now it's like, okay,
you know what, I'm not trying to like hurt this
man's feelings. Yeah, but that's what I'm saying. You can
do it playfully, which is great, But nagging, I feel
(16:22):
like means more like like, oh, you know, by the
way your breath smells like ass, And then oh no,
I fucking hate that because how does okay, how are
you supposed to react to that by wanting them more,
I guess, and that's that that's their goal. Sometimes with nay,
like with nagging or whatever, it's hard to laugh it
off when you're receiving and it's like because it's like,
(16:44):
unless it's genuinely funny, it's sometimes it's just mean. And
then it's like you have to like brush it off
and like laugh like it was funny so it's not awkward,
But then you're like fake laughing about it, and that's
just miserable. I hate that, you know what I mean? Yeah,
maybe I should have told Bruce Springsteen's daughter that her
her dad's songs suck ass. You know your dad fucking
(17:06):
he's so lame, dude, I hate your dad. Um, Okay,
let me ask you a question. Is gen Z? You're
gen Z? I'm like right on the cusp, are you?
I think because I'm almost twenty, I'm pretty sure that's
like solidly gen Z. Okay, do you know what, Cody?
I hate being gen Z. So let's just let's just
(17:28):
say I'm on the cus far. But one above it
is millennial. You're definitely not a millennial. Oh. I don't
want to be that either. Fuck? What's wrong with that?
I want to be a senior citizen or something. I
feel like they're chill as fuck. Is gen Z out
there playing hard to get? Like they? I feel like
they approach everything better than millennials because they just grew
up ingrained with this massive communication web. Do they play
(17:49):
hard to get or they're they just like, yeah, I'm
end you, let's do it, you know, I honestly think
it depends. Well. It's actually interesting because I've talked to
a millennial and a gen Z and multiple gen Z,
multiple of each, and there is a difference. Actually, I
feel like millennials are more straight up. They're just like
and maybe it's because they're older, but I feel like
(18:10):
they play less games to be honest, at least from
my experience, whereas gen Z is like all over the place,
they're cheating, they're lying, they care one day, they don't care.
The next day. They aren't even trying to play hard
to get. They more just don't give a fuck. I
feel like nobody in my generation gives a fuck or
has any feeling. Dating in this age group is so
(18:35):
miserable because everybody is nobody wants to commit. Everybody's like
all over the place they're ghosting you one day, then
they're back the next. There's no consistency. It's a mess. Yeah.
I don't envy. I don't envy you, you know, but
I'm talk to you about this because you are a
(18:55):
genuine person and people see that that's one of the
reasons why you're so successful. And I feel like that
also will go far for you in the dating world.
I've done actually, I mean I've done bad, but I
also have done I've had good luck, like really like
I I've been able to find ways to like look
in other kind of not my direct space, do you
(19:17):
know what I mean, Like, not other YouTubers, not other
social media people. I try to go out of that now.
And I feel like that's worked so much better because
nobody really cares when they're not in it here. Like
if you're talking to let's say, like an actor, they're
not going to care about YouTube as much. They just
(19:39):
don't care. So then it's like it's like you got
it's there's not that superficial element. And to be honest,
like I'm not that into movies, so like if I
am talking to and I'm not talking to an actor,
but if I was, like then it's fine, Like I
genuinely don't watch movies, so I don't give a funk
what movie you've been Like, Babe, man, being on set
was so hard. Today craft service has really sucked. You're like,
(20:00):
I don't give a ship. I have a brand deal
to fucking take care of. All right. Literally, I'm like,
my sea geek is doing three hours. Shut the funk up. Listen,
We're gonna take a quick break. But when we come back,
me and Emma are gonna tweak the advice in real time.
And by that, I mean we're gonna fix it, just
so we know, because we just talked about it's complicated.
(20:22):
So let's figure out. Let's let's iron out the wrinkles here,
Let's figure out how to how to fix this piece
of advice. Listen. As a guy, I talk about male
pleasure all the time. I'm pretty sure on the last
episode I talked about jerking off for like twenty to
thirty minutes straight. But now it's time to talk about
(20:43):
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now available exclusively at your local Target or online at
Target dot com. Okay, here's my best attempt at fixing
this one. Don't play hard to get. Don't play easy
to get, play fun to get that okay, right, There's
(22:28):
zero shame in showing someone that you're interested in them
from the get go. But when in doubt go buy
the famous acronym dB A f C. Don't be a
fucking creed. That's also true death love that. What I'm
saying is show show interest, but do it with tact right.
Don't like in comment on every picture. Don't reach out
(22:49):
consecutive times without a response. You know trip, I'm talking quadruple,
quintuple text. Don't buy them a diamond necklace after your
first Macha date. Um, the chase can be one of
the best parts of a new thing, right, so make
it fun, keep it light. Sure you might have visions
of dropping your future children off at college with the
person at your side after meeting them initially. But just
(23:10):
play a cool and remember de bath Bath. Is there
anything you'd like to add to that? I mean, the
way you put it was fucking perfect. But I also
think the other thing is I had to learn this
the hard way. You will embarrass yourself if you don't
just follow your fucking instinct. If you're like, oh, I
(23:30):
need to comment on every photo so that they know that, No,
just do it when it makes sense. Don't strategize anything.
It's make it simple. Have fun and the bath, Bath,
have fun and bath. There are people with shitty instincts,
though I don't know that's a good point. Like some
people their instinct is to literally text five thousand times
(23:52):
in a row, and I don't funk with anyone like that,
and I refuse to associate with them. So that's you
hold on. Maybe if they follow that instinct, then they'll
find someone who likes to be texted five thousand times
in a row, and actually it works out. That's honestly,
I think that there's people that like that. When I
really like a guy, to be honest, they could text
(24:12):
me fifty times, and I if I genuinely really like them,
and I would um fifties a lot. But if I
get like double texted though by a guy that I like,
I love it. It makes me feel good. Yeah. No,
I agree. We talked at the beginning, but like, I
want to see the passion that me and Kelsey right
off the bat were like. I was unabashed about it.
I was like, I said that we had our first
(24:32):
date and night. On the first date, I said, I
have tickets to a concert tomorrow. Do you want to
come to the concert? And we did a we did
a second date the very next day, and so that
I could have you know, played a cool a little bit.
But what's that happened? You know, we both knew. I
think when it's a genuine connection, you don't have to
play those games. I really do. Yeah, yeah, I think
(24:52):
that's true. I think that's definitely true. What's the worst
advice you've ever received in general or with dating? Okay,
you know what, I would say the worst advice and
this actually kind of does relate to this topic, and
I think it might just be because that's on my mind,
But I think the worst advice would kind of be
(25:15):
to play hard to get because I remember in one
relationship when I was way younger, I did that. I
was playing hard to get with this guy that I
genuinely really liked, and this fits way too perfectly with it,
but it really is on my brain. It I just
thought about it. I mean, like me not giving affection
in a relationship and playing hard to get in a
relationship caused of the breakup because this guy thought I
(25:37):
hated him, but I was always like, well, I want
him to like me and so, and it ruined a relationship,
which honestly, I'm so glad I got ruined because that
ship was not good anyway. But like at the time,
I was like, I totally funked this up because I
literally would never text him first, like never, whatever, and
that's fucked. I feel like that is the classic plot
(25:58):
line of like every high school romance movie is someone
tells the kid who's interested in the girl or whatever
to be a dick play hard to get, and then
the girl is always like, well, what the fund this
guy clearly doesn't isn't into it, and then later he's like, no,
I was, I'm sorry. I just my friend told me
to be an asshole. That is exactly what fucking happened
(26:19):
to me. So and that's that was bad advice. I mean,
to be honest, I think the reason why I'm struggling
with this question is because half the time when people
give me advice, I in one ear out the other.
You know what I mean. I I really am the
type of person that needs to touch the stove to
believe that it's hot. And so yeah, I'm the same way.
(26:40):
I just like somebody could give me the best advice
and be like, m that's super unfortunate because I'm gonna
go do exactly what you told me not to do.
I wish I was better at listening to advice from people,
like when I know in my gut that it's real,
because I'm the same way someone tells me the stove
is hot and I and I feel in my gut
that they're right, which a lot of the times I
(27:01):
do someone gives me advice and I respect them and
I know they're probably they're probably spitting truth at me.
I'll still go touch the fucking thing same and it's
because I have to know. Yeah, And that's like the
I learned the hard way, you know. I think it's good.
I don't think that that's a bad thing necessarily. I
think there's growth in that, a lot of growth in that. Okay,
how would you feel about doing the lightning round I'm
(27:24):
gonna get I'm gonna name two people of note, and
you have to tell me who you'd rather take advice from.
In this scenario, you have to take advice from one
of them, and you have to tell me why you're
choosing one over the other. Okay, perfect, Jaden Smith or
Tyler the Creator. Tyler the Creator because I just feel
like he's so funny that he would give me advice.
That would Okay. Sometimes when people give you advice, they're
(27:47):
like so fucking annoying about it and so preachy about it, right,
and I don't like that. And I feel like Tyler
would give you advice in a funny way. And I
absorbed information better when it makes me laugh, and I
think he would really do that. Words. I feel like
Jaden Smith might be a little bit more on the
preachier side of things, and I think that that would
(28:09):
make me feel stupid and bad about myself. And I
can tell because of all of his capital letters in
every Instagram caption before every word. It shows me that
he knows something I don't. That intimidates me. I don't
even want to know what his brain looks like inside
his captains and capital letters. Yeah, he like. I remember
one time I stalked him, like a few months ago
because I found some songs by him that I liked
(28:30):
and I never listened. And then I look at his
Instagram and it's like every first letter of every word
was capital and I was like, this man is like
he got another eye open somewhere that I don't because like,
how do you who? What's going on? Um? Anyway, But
that's how he gives advice to exactly, and that's too
much letters. Literally, No, No, it's the first letter of
(28:56):
every word. So it's not the full word that I
hate that, that's what he does. Hate that. Why do
people do that? I don't know it does. It can't
seem a little like it's the fucking name of a
restaurant or some ship. You don't it's not a you know,
proper noun or whatever the fuck. It's also exhausting to type,
like it's so genuinely tying to type something like that. Yeah, okay,
(29:18):
Logan Paul or Bill Night the science guy. Do you know,
Oh my god, yeah, I would say Bill Night just
because I don't know that that was definitely a hard one. Um. Actually,
I well, okay, you know that Bill Night would have
like the sweetest, fucking, most endearing advice ever. Although I'm
(29:43):
going to be real with you, I would love to
see what kind of advice Logan would give, because I
I don't know what if he just blew us out
of the water and gave us some sort of crazy
you know deep you know, I don't know. I bet
you his advice would just be like, just go for it,
(30:04):
just do it. Just that's that's that's very true. There's
nothing wrong with that. I just think that's that's what
he's like. It's also like everything he's done has been successful,
so it's kind of hard for him not to be like,
just try and do a lot of push ups. Yeah,
and punch people and you got this, let's go. Yeah. No,
Bill may are on a Grande or a Grande Starbucks
(30:25):
pumpkin spice latte. You know, I'm gonna go with the
pumpkin spice latte because I uh, well, actually it's just
a Grande and it was a nt different, so I'm
actually gonna go with Ariana Grande. Okay, Leonardo DiCaprio or me,
Cody co I have this weird Okay, listen, Leonardo DiCaprio
is probably a great guy. Okay, I don't know. I
(30:48):
don't think he's listening. I think you can, you can
be honest. I know, I just I really sorry, Leo.
I know that you I know you fucking tracked me
down on every platform. Relax, but um, did you no? You? No?
He Okay, he just scares the ship out of me,
and I feel like his advice would also be terrible considering. Okay,
(31:11):
I have like a fear of people who maybe kind
of peaked, like he definitely peaked during Titanic, right, Okay,
I mean, okay, Well he peeked at this young age,
and now I feel like he's jaded and because he
was a heart throb, and like you know, I have
a fear of heart throbs. I think that they're evil
(31:33):
and I think that like the women love them too
much and now they're assholes. And I think his advice
would be shitty. Cody, you are a great guy, and
I stand by that. I would like your advice instead.
You have a you have a heart throb. Yeah, no, really,
I think the most like heart throbs, Like, I mean,
I loved magcon back and like that's terrifying to me. Now,
(31:53):
you know, it's scary to see everything. All right, we've
so we've talked about the worst advice you've received. But
before you take off, what is the worst advice that
you've ever given someone? No, here's the bad advice that
I've given. This happened recently, and I have this bad
habit where I'm always the type to be like, you know,
(32:16):
just say how you're feeling, do whatever you want, go
crazy whatever. I knew that this guy that my friend
was talking to was a douche bag, but she wanted
to hang out with him. So I told her to
ask him to hang out and I eat, knowing deep
down that he might be a dick about it and
it might hurt her feelings, but she wanted to. So
(32:36):
I was like, you know what, doing right? And it
went like completely wrong. I mean like it was just
like every time I tell somebody, I if I read
somebody's character, like let's say it's a dude for my
friend or whatever, and like even if they're an asshole,
I'll just tell people. I almost tell people to like
touch the stove. That's what I'm trying to say. I
(32:58):
will like push people in maybe the wrong direction, knowing
that they're gonna possibly get hurt, but it's harmless because
I know that they're going to learn something from it. That's,
in my opinion, bad advice because I'm almost on purpose
giving them bad advice. Yeah, but that's do you know
what I mean? Yeah, but then it ends up being
good advice. I know you're does that good at give
(33:19):
me advice. You can't come up with bad advice. Bad
advice is disguised as good advice. Holy sh it. That
makes me look like such a I don't know, I
literally care a profit, wasn't. I get a lot of
cameos from people that are like, oh, Mi'm turning twenty,
give me some advice. Or I'm graduating college, give me
(33:40):
some advice, And I never know what to say. But
now I'm going to say, touch the stove. Touch the stove.
I'm gonna get that tatted on me somewhere, even if
it's glowing red, even if it's touch it, but just
not like maybe metaphorically though, so they're like Honestly, I
feel like somebody if I got a cameo from you
and you told me to touch to stove, I would
(34:01):
unfortunately probably do it and just be like Cody of course.
So I yeah, as long as they know it's a metaphor,
you know, actually no, don't, don't tell them. If they're
dumb enough to do it, then that's their loss. If
we've learned anything from this episode, it's take your advice,
not mine. I think that's I think that's what we've learned.
And de Bath all right, I think that I'll do
(34:25):
it for this episode. Um, I want to thank Emma
Chamberlain so much for joining us. I think we solved
another one here, and I mean, I know you've only
been on one episode, but if we're keeping track, I
think I'm four for four at this point, which is
huge for me. And I couldn't have kept a street
going without U, Emma, So I appreciate you being here.
Is there anything that you want to plug right now?
(34:47):
My podcast? Well, first, thank you, this was my pleasure
and U. My podcast is called Anything Goes and my
name's Emma Chamberlain. You can find me everywhere under that name.
And that's about it perfect, all right, thanks Cody, Yeah,
thank you later piece. Amen, you have in trouble with life,
(35:12):
well let me give you some of funs. The Pleasure
Is Ours is a production of I Heart Radio and
Trojan Brand hosted by me Cody Co. The podcast is
executive produced by Ethan Fixel, produced and written by Jonathan Grimm,
written by David Doot and engineered, edited and mixed by
Matt Stillo. Our theme song was composed by me Cody
(35:32):
Co with additional music by Brad Kemp at Second Bedroom Studio.
If you haven't already subscribed, rated, or reviewed The Pleasure
As Ours, please do so on the I Heart Radio app,
Apple podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Baby, thanks
again for tuning into The Pleasure as Ours presented by
Trojan Brand Condoms. That's a wrap for our episode, and
(35:55):
also you should be wrapping it up in the bedroom.
I'm talking, of course about your heinous You know, when
you're out there doing your thing, you've got to be
safe and you've got to get a condom that works
for you. If you ever hear a guy complaining about condoms,
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He probably doesn't even know that Trojan has over thirty
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(36:17):
So pick up a box of Trojan condoms wherever you
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you've been wanting to try out. Look at you, you
fucking sex lord. Go for it, buddy, See you next time.
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