I Accidentally Took Someone's Life

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome one and all to the Professional Homegirl Podcast. Before
we begin today's episode, we want to remind you that
the views and opinions expressed on this podcast are those
of the hosts and guests and are intended for educational
and entertaining purposes. In this safe space, no question is
off limits because you never know how someone's storyline can
be your lifeline. The Professional Homegirl Podcast is here to

(00:22):
celebrate the diverse voices, stories and experiences of women of color,
providing a platform for authentic and empowering conversations. There will
be some key king, some tears, but most importantly, a
reminder that tough times don't last, but professional homegirls do
enjoy the show.

Speaker 2 (00:48):
What's up Professional Homegirls? Ishugar Ebine here and I hope
all is cute. We're back with another fire episode, Dive
into my guest incredible journey of Resilia's reflection and transformation.
My guests was a correctional officer who, after a life
altering accident, found herself not only facing physical paralysis, but

(01:11):
also navigating the complex emotions of accidentally taking someone's life.
As we explore her story, we'll discuss the challenges she
face in prison, the realities of the legal system and
how she's rebuilding her life one step at a time. Literally,
this is such a raw and real conversation about forgiveness,

(01:32):
second chances in the shremth it takes to overcome life's
toughest moments. So get ready, because I accidentally took someone's
life starts now. All right to my guests, thank you
so much for being on the show. How you feeling,
how you doing.

Speaker 3 (01:47):
I'm feeling good. I'm feeling good. How you feeling you.

Speaker 2 (01:50):
Know, I'm feeling good. I feel like today or I
feel like this week Monday has been like forever. But huh, I.

Speaker 3 (01:58):
Said, it's like it's still money day even though the
week is going.

Speaker 2 (02:01):
But right like, this has been a long, aast week.

Speaker 3 (02:05):
It's all for sure for sure.

Speaker 2 (02:08):
Right then you said earlier you're feeling nervous. Why are
you feeling nervous?

Speaker 4 (02:13):
Because I just want to I don't know. I always
get nervous, But once it start, you know, once you
start flowing and anything starts to come into play.

Speaker 3 (02:22):
But that's just my anxiety. Yes, somebody's watching me.

Speaker 2 (02:26):
Literally listen. It's so funny because I don't know how
I found my guests but we were d I was
DM at her because that's how I approached most of
my my guests for the show. And she's like, you
know my story, You're gonna do your research. I'm like, yeah, girl,
I'm gonna.

Speaker 3 (02:41):
Do my research right right, right right.

Speaker 2 (02:44):
I was like, yeah, she thinks I'm gonna half on
my show, and I don't know.

Speaker 3 (02:48):
All right, right right, like hold on, hold on right.

Speaker 2 (02:52):
You must have came across that before.

Speaker 4 (02:54):
Yeah, Okay, like sometimes people, so I don't know how
it's going to be, like or I would have to
carry it or they gonna carry it, or if we're
gonna vibe and and you know, bing back offing each other,
like you know what I'm saying, It's just some some
people have it and some people trying to get to it.

Speaker 3 (03:13):
So but I feel like you got it.

Speaker 4 (03:15):
I was already vibing what you do through writing, right,
So I know it's about to be a good show.

Speaker 2 (03:20):
Now it's gonna be a fire conversation for sure. Now.
I think your story is so fascinated because there's so
many different levels to it. But I was also interested in,
like what made you want to become a correctional officer?

Speaker 4 (03:33):
Well, I had a friend that ended up being a
uh state trooper. She applied to state trooper and then
she had brought it to my attention, like why don't
you apply to be, you know, a state trooper. At
this time, I was a teacher, and I was like,
I'm like, well, it's a little money, more money into that.
But I had love teaching, but I knew I wanted

(03:53):
to get more money and you know, kind of change
my career. So then I decided it's like, you know what,
I'm gonna to be a state trooper. I'm gonna go
through the steps that I have to do it. If
I fail, which I don't fail anything, but if I fail,
I won't do it. But if I continue to keep going,
then that's what that's.

Speaker 3 (04:12):
What I'm gonna be.

Speaker 2 (04:13):
So then what did you teach? I?

Speaker 3 (04:17):
E P kids?

Speaker 2 (04:18):
What's that?

Speaker 4 (04:19):
Nine twelve?

Speaker 3 (04:22):
Let me think how I can word it?

Speaker 2 (04:23):
Oh, I know that's that's that's what a smart kid.

Speaker 4 (04:28):
Like.

Speaker 3 (04:29):
Oh they need extra help.

Speaker 2 (04:32):
Oh okay, okay, yeah, okay.

Speaker 4 (04:35):
And they're all in one class from the from the
grades of ninet tough twelve. They're all in one class.
It's probably like six seven of them and I just
help them do the subjects.

Speaker 2 (04:46):
Okay, So you took the test to be a CEO
and you passed. And when I was doing research on
your story, it's not like you really enjoyed your job,
Like what did you love most about it?

Speaker 3 (04:57):
But about being a CEO?

Speaker 4 (04:58):
Yeah, to be honest, Uh, just the respect that I
got from the men in there, Like you know, what
they taught us and what they teach you is you
have to be this certain way and treat them this
certain way and act a certain way, which I know
you know to be true. But you know, they're just

(05:20):
like us. They're they're human. You don't got to go
in there. They're already. They're already in there. They don't
need extra help for you to pound on them and everything.
So I respect they gave me respect and I and
I enjoyed that like that was that was a blessing
to me because they almost was just like.

Speaker 3 (05:37):
Yo, I've never let nothing happen to you.

Speaker 4 (05:38):
I'm like, I appreciate that job, but you know, stole
my job as a job.

Speaker 2 (05:44):
And how long were you a c O?

Speaker 3 (05:46):
Eight months?

Speaker 2 (05:47):
Oh wow? So if everything didn't happen the way that,
did you think you would still cl.

Speaker 4 (05:53):
No, I would end up uh still probably being in
in law enforcement, but I want wanted to uh, I
wanted to move up and probably like a detective, uh
something outside of the prison. I definitely didn't want to
be in the prison for twenty five thirty years.

Speaker 3 (06:09):
Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 2 (06:12):
So as a correctional officer, what were your initial thoughts
about the prison system and the people within it?

Speaker 4 (06:21):
I had my different feelings about the prison system. They
pick and choose definitely who was going to get what
and how they're going to be judged and what they're
going to.

Speaker 3 (06:34):
Give to people.

Speaker 4 (06:37):
So I hate, I hate saying the race card, but
they protect their own. Like even with the situation with me,
it's just like the person that the same situation that
happened with me happened to another person and then he
was a white male and all he got was like.

Speaker 2 (07:00):
Finds yo, you know what's so crazy? So I was
telling my homegirl about our conversation and your story, and
she was like she was black, wasn't she? And I
was like why you say that? And she's like, because
I really do believe she was a white woman, she
wouldn't have went to jail. Do you feel like that.

Speaker 4 (07:18):
At one point I tried to tried to make myself like,
you know, no, it's not like that.

Speaker 3 (07:23):
It's not like that, it's not like that. And then
the more I looked at it, and I'm like, ain't
no way. Maybe maybe it is. Because I didn't want
to I didn't want to do that race thing, like
you know.

Speaker 2 (07:33):
Just you don't always want to say it's about race.

Speaker 4 (07:35):
Right right, Like I don't want to do that, Like
like for me to say that, I'm like, that's cliche,
Like I don't want to say that. But the more
I was looking at stuff and then I'm researching things,
and I'm like, maybe it is. And then, like I said,
the same thing happened to someone else maybe a few
months later after my situation, and he got fined Wow,

(07:59):
and his and this thing is its accident. He actually
end up I believe, accidentally killing two people.

Speaker 3 (08:08):
One being his father Wow. Another person in a female.

Speaker 2 (08:13):
How did you find this tea out?

Speaker 3 (08:16):
It was in the paper, mm, in the paper right
around our area.

Speaker 4 (08:20):
Because when you once do something like that, you start
looking stuff up, you getting into your stuff, trying to
figure out like what's going on?

Speaker 3 (08:28):
Because your freedom, yes absolutely.

Speaker 2 (08:31):
Now could you have used that to prove your case.
I know I'm we jumping ahead, but.

Speaker 4 (08:39):
I tried and it meant absolutely not. The only thing
they said that what had been the difference is they
was like, oh, ten years ago, when people would have
core accidents, you would only get probation. That's all the
thing my my lawyer kept saying, I'm like, well, this
isn't ten years ago.

Speaker 3 (08:54):
We're talking about the now. Don't tell me nothing about
ten years ago. What can we do now?

Speaker 4 (08:59):
I'm me But whatever that God did to get whatever
he got, I wish I would have had what he.

Speaker 2 (09:07):
Had, right, you know what. Everything happened for a reason,
because yeah, because I do believe that your story, unfortunately,
could happen to anybody, and I think by you sharing
your story and letting people know what to do and
what not to do it, it would definitely help somebody else.
You just never know, especially with being a black woman,
because she said, I know if she was a white person,
this would not have happened to her.

Speaker 3 (09:29):
I believe that. Sorry to say, but I believe that.
I mean, we all entitled were own opinions, right, So.

Speaker 2 (09:36):
Walk up through the day of the accident and what
you remember most about that moment, Okay, I remember why
you smiling.

Speaker 4 (09:43):
It's like it's such a it's such a weird story,
Like it's so weird. So at this time I didn't
have locks, because you know, as you said, I have
locks now. So at this time I had something like
the folk locks. So one of my brains came out
in the front. So I had one of my homegirl
to to break it back up for me before I
went to work, because I'm like, I am not going

(10:04):
to work with this piece of hair up like this,
Like this is not going to work for me. So
I went to her house and she did my and
she did my piece hair for me, and I remember
crying to her that that day about something real private,
like just me and her.

Speaker 3 (10:18):
I just opened up.

Speaker 4 (10:20):
So I'm crying to her about that, and then I
was like, you know, well when I get home, this
is what I'm going to do x y Z. And
she was like, all right, just let me know. And
so then I started driving to work, and it just
it just seemed like everything happened like so quick. I
just I don't even feel like I was It's.

Speaker 3 (10:43):
Like a blurry situation.

Speaker 4 (10:44):
It's so hard to like remember, like as I was driving,
I remember a car being in front of me and
I was able to pass, so I passed that car.
Then it was another car in front of me, still
dotted lines. I went to pass that car as well.
Then the car that I was passing went to speed
up on me. And when that car sped up, now

(11:06):
we're sitting here and I'm like, oh, snap, well let
me put the pedal, you know. So I sped up
to try to try to beat this car. And then
in this time frame like doing just like that, that
the lines turned solid.

Speaker 3 (11:21):
And then.

Speaker 4 (11:23):
Yeah, but now by mind d I'm already on that
other side because we were because I was already trying
to cross. But now they now they turned solid, and
now I'm like, oh man, I gotta make a decision.
But then when I like look, now I see a
car which I'm in their lane now coming towards me,
and I looked to my right that car is parallel

(11:44):
to me, and then I just remember trying to like
turn the wheel as fast as I couldn't, kind of
like slam on the brake so that car can go
in front of me. And I just remember me and
a person colliding. But I didn't think that it was bad.
I was just like when I fucked myself and I
was just like, oh wow, I'm alive. Oh this must

(12:05):
just be a fender bender. At this point, I was
ejected from the car. I was outside of the car
in the grass, in the woods.

Speaker 3 (12:13):
Where was she?

Speaker 2 (12:14):
Like on a highway where.

Speaker 4 (12:16):
I live is kind of like countrylight and where and
where my job was to it's like a whole bunch
of field and stuff.

Speaker 3 (12:23):
So it was just a it was.

Speaker 4 (12:24):
Just a regular road one one you can go one way,
one you can come the other way. Just a two lane,
that's it. And I was I was laying outside. I
was laying outside on the grass. I just remember being
on my stomach and I remember somebody screaming like, oh
my god, oh my god, this young lady's young lady.
And I'm just like only thing I can remember saying,

(12:45):
I'm trying to get the work. So I'm gonna get
the work and I'm gonna get up. Is everybody okay?
Not knowing that I'm not okay, Like.

Speaker 2 (12:53):
How were you flying out the window?

Speaker 3 (12:55):
Nope?

Speaker 4 (12:57):
And to be honest, I'm gonna say this is God.
And because we can never we can never try to
figure this out. My window wasn't broken on it because
I because I got ejected on the passenger side. My
window wasn't shattered, and I guess my my door must
have opened because no.

Speaker 3 (13:13):
Window was shattered.

Speaker 4 (13:15):
Wow, the front wasn't shattered, neither my windshield. Like, no
windows were shattered or broken, So it must have that.
When I say, god, I can show you pictures. Girls amazing.

Speaker 2 (13:29):
So when did you realize that you was an accident?
Like when did it hit pitch you?

Speaker 3 (13:35):
Uh?

Speaker 4 (13:38):
Yeah, when they said, uh, well, when I was in
the helicopter. When I was in a helicopter and they
were asking me all these questions, what's your name? How
older you was? The president? And asked me all these questions,
and I just remember, like.

Speaker 2 (13:51):
It was when they asked you the president.

Speaker 3 (13:54):
Right, I definitely didn't want to say who at that time.

Speaker 2 (13:58):
It's the same nigga we got today.

Speaker 3 (14:00):
Yup, y'ap yep. Absolutely, So I'm like, man, they like
they like. Uh.

Speaker 4 (14:07):
I just remember it felt like everything started to close
in on me and I'm like, y'all and I'm like
every I'm like and then I asked him, I'm like,
I'm about to die. I'm like, cause I'm in a
helicopter like this, this has got to be bad. You
want a helicopter. They're like, no, You're not about to die.
I'm like, all right, please don't let me die. I
got a twin sister and she can't make it without me.

(14:28):
Whatever you do, just please bring me back. And then
after that that was it.

Speaker 3 (14:32):
I don't remember anything after that.

Speaker 2 (14:34):
So when you woke up and realized you was paralyzed,
what was your first thought?

Speaker 5 (14:38):
Like?

Speaker 2 (14:38):
Who told you you was paralyzed? So did you kind
of knew? Did you know when you woke up and
you couldn't flee your legs?

Speaker 4 (14:44):
No, when I woke up, I didn't know anything. I
just thought I was in the hospital on my legs
were just broken. Because I'm not paralyzed. I just it's
more to the story and we're gonna get to it, right.
But I'm not paralyzed. But when I woke up, I
just thought like it was just a regular car accident,
you know, maybe my legs were just broken and we're

(15:06):
gonna fix it and I'm gonna go about my way.

Speaker 3 (15:08):
I'm about to start life again now. Probably just got
to do a little here.

Speaker 2 (15:11):
And their therapy, and you was thinking that it was
something light.

Speaker 4 (15:16):
I never thought this at all, Like and they but
my mom and then kept saying like I kept telling
people like, oh, yeah, I'm about to go home in
a couple of days, like, don't y'all worry I'm there.

Speaker 3 (15:27):
Was like, is she medicated? They're like yeah.

Speaker 4 (15:29):
They was like, don't listen to anything she's saying, because
I just kept telling them like I'm gonna go home
in a couple of days.

Speaker 3 (15:34):
Don't y'all worry about it. I'm going home in a
couple days. My mom was like, your faith was through
the roof.

Speaker 4 (15:38):
She's like, cause you wasn't going anywhere. Everything was broken
from my femur to my tibia broken femur shattered femur, broken, kneecaps,
a c l MCL tibbi, a fhibula. Everything was broken
from my hips, missing my hips by an inch, from
my hips, hand both legs.

Speaker 2 (16:00):
Oh my god, that is crazy. Yeah, Yo, do you
ever go back? Do you ever think about if you
can just go back to that day, Like, what would
you tell yourself?

Speaker 3 (16:09):
Good question?

Speaker 2 (16:13):
You know, I got to get my oprah on with
stories like this.

Speaker 4 (16:15):
I like that question. I never I never thought about that,
but I do. When I get into my excuse me,
when I get into my little moods where I'm not
feeling myself, I do go back and look at my
videos and stuff to see where I came where I'm
at now and like where I came from, just to

(16:37):
let me let myself know, Like girl, you came from somewhere,
like all right, like you allowed to be down just
for this day, but we're not gonna stay here. You know,
you're feeling a way today whatever whatever the situation is,
but tomorrow we're going to get up. Like you came
a long way. You could have not even had legs.
You almost didn't have legs.

Speaker 3 (16:56):
Yes, you almost died.

Speaker 5 (16:58):
Yeah, you out here and you're walking and you're driving
down and you know you're doing be able to do
podcasts and you're trying to do different events and just
get your story out and just show different people, like
you know, how life is precious, life is good, and
you can bounce back from anything that you that has happened,
like don't let a situation dictate your life.

Speaker 2 (17:20):
Yeah yeah, yeah, man, what a word? God is good child.
Because he was recording I had start her get up
and walk to Gil gets some water and I said,
come on now. I was like, you better get up
and walk right, so you wasn't paralyzed then, m But they.

Speaker 3 (17:37):
Didn't know if I was going to walk again. They weren't.

Speaker 4 (17:41):
They weren't too sure. And I just kept saying, oh, yeah,
I'm gonna walk. Like you give me the opportunity to walk,
I'm going to walk. And then they started they started
to do their their surgeries.

Speaker 2 (17:51):
And many surgeries that you have.

Speaker 3 (17:57):
Thirty two, thirty three, thirty.

Speaker 2 (17:59):
Two, and why so many surgeries.

Speaker 3 (18:04):
Because they were trying to put stuff back together.

Speaker 4 (18:07):
Then they then I ain't up getting infection, so they're
trying to clean the infection out so they wouldn't have
to cut my leg off because if they didn't clean infection,
they would have had to end up cutting my leg off.
It was just my legs were so dismantled that the
doctor actually said, like, I've never seen this before. I

(18:29):
have no idea what I'm going to do. I have
to go home and look at this because I have
no idea how I'm going to attack this.

Speaker 2 (18:38):
And I was just like he, technically, he has to
rebuild your legs.

Speaker 3 (18:43):
I'm an old study. Wow, University of Delaware.

Speaker 2 (18:48):
Oh my god, So how did they rebuild your legs? Listen,
you got my full attention because I could just only
imagine as a doctor not ever seeing anything like this,
and I don't know what's gonna happen.

Speaker 3 (19:03):
He didn't.

Speaker 4 (19:03):
He was like, I don't know, and I just kept
telling you, well, if you give me the opportunity to walk,
I'm gonna walk. So they started out with it's a
lot of screws and plates and just anything, and just
try to put my bones and stuff back together inside
my leg because he didn't want He was trying to

(19:24):
make sure I didn't have a lot of scars and
scrapes and cutting knives and stuff. He was like, that's
what it was. His one thing that I found so
nice about him. He's like, I don't want to keep
cutting your legs. And you look like he's got a
road map. He's like, you're still a young woman. You
might want to wear heels and a dress and this
and that. So they end up putting everything together, but

(19:49):
then when they realized, he ended up realizing a year later,
everything that he had put together with the titanium and
bars and all that. He didn't like the way it
was growing within my bone, so he ended up taking
it out.

Speaker 2 (20:03):
Nah.

Speaker 3 (20:05):
Yeah, he ended up taking it out.

Speaker 4 (20:07):
And that was like one of the first biggest setbacks.
I'm like, as soon as I thought that I was
about to really start moving, goes back and was like,
I don't like the way that that bone is growing.
We're about to take this out. So he ended up
coming up with something called a distal female replacement, So

(20:28):
the big long metal piece with a fake patilla, and
he attached it from the femur to the tibia. So
he took all the bone out from my and my
one leg and took that piece and attached it. And
so now my leg is made of metal and no bone.

(20:51):
And that's when it became that's when he's seen him
was successful.

Speaker 2 (20:55):
You have met your leg now, Yeah, both of my.

Speaker 3 (20:58):
Legs are made of metal. It's no bone.

Speaker 4 (21:00):
Wow, it's a little piece of boom because it's attached
to it, right, But there's.

Speaker 3 (21:06):
No is no boom.

Speaker 4 (21:08):
My whole leg is made of metal, but I have
but I still have my legs like that. If you
were to look at me, you wouldn't know unless I
said something to you like, or we go through uh.

Speaker 3 (21:19):
Metal detector and it goes off. I'd be like, oh, yeah,
that's just my legs and.

Speaker 2 (21:23):
Then here my body is amazing.

Speaker 3 (21:27):
And think about a hundred years ago my legs would
have been done.

Speaker 4 (21:30):
Had no legs, just think about it, maybe even sixty
seventy years ago, I wouldn't have.

Speaker 2 (21:36):
Wouldn't have been what told you, I don't know what
to tell you.

Speaker 3 (21:39):
I don't know what to tell you. You better figure
it out.

Speaker 2 (21:41):
Right, So then walk us through the timeline, because that
was a year of you going through the surgery and
figure out what you was gonna do with your legs.
So how long was it afterwards you got a phone

(22:03):
call from the police.

Speaker 3 (22:06):
So twenty seventeen.

Speaker 4 (22:08):
My accident happened October twenty six, twenty seventeen. I ended
up staying at the hospital until January of twenty eighteen,
and then I ended up going to a spot in
Philly called McGee, a rehabilitation center to learn how to

(22:29):
get my independence back. I was there until February, and
then that was February twenty eighteen. May twenty eighteen, I
got a call from the barracks telling them telling me
to come down to make a statement about the core accident.
So when I go down there, I don't know nothing.
I'm just like, you know, I'm about to just go

(22:49):
make the statements nothing. You know, it's nothing. I didn't
do nothing wrong. There's no drugs, there's no alcohol. I'm
a correctional officer. I'm on my way to work.

Speaker 2 (22:55):
It's like you a law abiding citizen, y'all know.

Speaker 4 (23:00):
My background is clean because I couldn't have got the
job without it. Like, you know, it's nothing. And I
go down there and I make my statement, and then
they were like, you know, you're under arrest. You know
someone has died in this car accident. And wait wait
what like under arrest like to go where? Like it

(23:22):
was just like total shock, like somebody died. Like I
was like my heart just dropped, like somebody died. And
they're like, yeah, someone else was injured, you know, in
this accident. And I'm like it was an accident. I'm like,
it was an accident, Like no drugs, no alcohol, And.

Speaker 2 (23:39):
Why he's just not telling you a year.

Speaker 4 (23:41):
Later because I was in the hospital that whole time,
and I think my family knew, but nobody. I was
already going through all that, and I was like, I
was going through so them even trying to tell me
I probably wouldn't to comprehend, and then did comprehend and

(24:04):
went into a whole different mental Like, you know, it
would have been probably a totally different probably mental honestly,
if I would have like knew something like that. So
I think they were just keeping it from me. But
when I went down to the barracks and then they
told me it's just, you know, I instantly felt bad
for it, for whoever that that family was, because you know,

(24:27):
that was something that was never supposed to happen.

Speaker 3 (24:30):
I never have wanted to happen, you know.

Speaker 4 (24:32):
And then and I'm a person that's going to take accountability,
Like I'm like that I wish I didn't go on
the other side of the road, you know, just to pass,
like I wasn't in a I wasn't in a rush
or anything, but you know, because I don't want to
really put it on the other car. But I'm like,
but if that car never sped up, Like, what was
your purpose of doing that?

Speaker 5 (24:51):
Right?

Speaker 3 (24:51):
What was like what were you trying to accomplish? Like
for what?

Speaker 4 (24:54):
And then I was you know, it's just a lot
of different thoughts that go through your head. But it
had how it happened, and you know, I take accountability
for it. I did my time. I'm very you know,
I'm very upset of you know, that that happened. I
think about this family every day. I wake up and
I'm like this, So I always think about the family.

(25:16):
I just hope that they're doing okay, because even though
I'm alive, someone has lost a life in the in
the midst of of me with an accident. So you know,
I definitely care about that in that sense. But at
the same time, you know, I still have to try
to make the best of life that I do have.

Speaker 2 (25:34):
Yeah, what happened to the other person because it was
your car, the person who passed away car, and then
the person who was trying to cut you off. Where
is that person?

Speaker 3 (25:44):
I have no idea.

Speaker 2 (25:45):
So they flee, he flee, that person flee the scene.

Speaker 3 (25:47):
I have no idea. I have no idea.

Speaker 2 (25:50):
That is crazy.

Speaker 3 (25:52):
I have no idea.

Speaker 2 (25:53):
And the cops haven't, like did their do kneeling just
just trying to like follow up and just trying to
locate this person.

Speaker 4 (25:59):
I think that they might have been in a statement
like they made a statement, but in that statement, yeah,
they made a statement, but in that statement they never
said nothing about their part of them speeding up or
not let me get over or anything like that.

Speaker 3 (26:16):
They just had like a whole nother story.

Speaker 4 (26:18):
But if the person that was behind the person that
I hit actually seen the whole thing, and in the statement, uh,
that person stated like I seen that car, my car
or whatever. I seen them trying to pass, and I
seen that car sped up on this young lady.

Speaker 3 (26:36):
If that would have never happened, this wouldn't have happened.

Speaker 4 (26:38):
And you know, but they didn't take they didn't take
the Spanish guy's word.

Speaker 3 (26:43):
They didn't take my word. They took the other person's word.

Speaker 2 (26:48):
That other person was white.

Speaker 3 (26:49):
Yeah, damn.

Speaker 2 (26:53):
Ah, that's both up.

Speaker 3 (26:55):
Yeah, that really hit me.

Speaker 2 (26:57):
That's really fucked up.

Speaker 3 (26:59):
They were and uh, clearly y'all was black.

Speaker 4 (27:02):
But the person that saw the whole thing, that said
like I seen it like clear it was a Spanish
guy and they was like, yeah, I'm not. Like pretty
much what he said was like non and void, like
they weren't trying to listen to nothing.

Speaker 2 (27:15):
He said, wow, you know, I watched sever of your
interviews and people were asking these type of questions because
I'm like something adding but we're gonna get to the
bottom moment on the show. Wow, that's crazy. And I'm
pretty sure because you and the Boonies because you had
in the work. So it really ain't no street cameras.

Speaker 4 (27:35):
So no, it was no cameras out there because they
were looking like trying to see, but there was no
cameras from nowhere. And I'm glad it was in the
daytime too, because it's dark, Like if it was at night,
it would have been like a whoa man, It's it's
like a one light every mom like yeah.

Speaker 1 (27:54):
Wow.

Speaker 2 (27:54):
So looking back, do you feel like your family should
have told you or like, did you tell your family
that you was heading to the police to give us because.

Speaker 3 (28:00):
Somebody had to take me. They had to take me
because I couldn't drive.

Speaker 2 (28:03):
And nobody say anything like just give you a heads up.
Somebody lost their life.

Speaker 3 (28:09):
Mm hmmm, mm hmmm.

Speaker 4 (28:13):
I didn't really like I just at this time, only
thing I was like really ever worried about. I was
trying to get myself back together and try to start
my life like over like somebody passing away that that
I didn't know that. So like me going to the
like me going to the police station, didn't didn't mean anything,

(28:37):
like didn't scare me because I'm like, all right, I
gonna make a statement, like all right, I got time.

Speaker 3 (28:41):
I got time today, like you know, like mm hmm.

Speaker 2 (28:45):
So you were arrested, where were you charged with?

Speaker 4 (28:48):
I ended up being charged with second degree public cause
public health and safety, and fourth degree aggravated assault. And
my public health in safety uh charge is equivalent to
a traffic ticket, a traffic ticket, and.

Speaker 2 (29:09):
You have to go to jail for.

Speaker 3 (29:10):
That, mm hmm.

Speaker 4 (29:12):
And and and everybody always say that because they were like,
hold on, what did you mean by that, like that
public health and safety?

Speaker 3 (29:19):
That's a that's a traffic ticket.

Speaker 4 (29:21):
Uh, a traffic ticket, like they'll say public health and safety.
But I guess it's like because it was a death,
you know, a death in this situation. So that's why
I end up uh going and going to prison.

Speaker 3 (29:37):
Mm hmm.

Speaker 2 (29:38):
And did you go to trial?

Speaker 3 (29:40):
We never went to trial. We just came up on
the public health, public health.

Speaker 4 (29:44):
And safety, and and uh the fourth degree uh aggravated assault.

Speaker 3 (29:49):
We never even talked of to trial. I'm gonna be
honest with you. My money. He didn't have trial I didn't
have trial.

Speaker 2 (29:56):
Money, and nobody like was even a part of the conversation.

Speaker 4 (30:03):
The crazy thing is when when they first end up
coming up with UH with something I was only going
to get like a few a few months. They had
me like like six.

Speaker 3 (30:17):
Or nine months.

Speaker 4 (30:18):
But then if I would have got six or nine months,
that would have been considered jail time. And then if
I wasn't in jail, I would apply for ISP and
then I would have been home M because IP intensive supervision,
So I would have been home.

Speaker 3 (30:33):
But the family wanted prison time.

Speaker 4 (30:35):
They wanted me to serve time, so I had to
get over that three sixty six, so I had to
They had to find something to get over that year
so I could serve prison time.

Speaker 2 (30:44):
And you never met the family, you have no like you.

Speaker 3 (30:47):
I've seen him, I've seen them in the court.

Speaker 2 (30:50):
I don't want to ask the question.

Speaker 3 (30:52):
Yeah, I've seen him in court, but we've never we've
never talked.

Speaker 2 (30:59):
Like just a m.

Speaker 4 (31:02):
The only thing they ever did to me was give
me bad looks, and I just I did nothing. I
just I was I'm not going to feed into it.
I understood how they were feeling. You know, I understand,
But another part of me knowing me and knowing my heart.
I'm just like you know, if you would have got
a chance to know me, or if you were to

(31:23):
get to know me, you know, when your emotions were
to calm down or ever calm down, I'm not what
you would hate. Like, I understand how you feeling, but
this is not even my style. But like I said,
there was no drugs, there was no alcohol. It was
a legit accident. Yeah, you know, it was just wrong
place at the wrong time.

Speaker 2 (31:43):
So as a former correctional offer, sir, how did it
feel to suddenly find yourself on the other side of
the system.

Speaker 3 (31:50):
I was nervous.

Speaker 4 (31:52):
And women in prison is definitely different, definitely different than
a male prison. And I worked in an all male
women are ruthless. That was It was crazy up there,
you know.

Speaker 2 (32:03):
What's so crazy? I interview a CEO. Well, she's retired now,
but she used to work at Rikers and she said
the same girl exactly, and she from Harlem. So I
was like, girl, but she said the same thing. She
was like, I work with niggas all day, she said,
but working with women, she said, nah, they different, they.

Speaker 3 (32:18):
Different, they different.

Speaker 4 (32:21):
I just I was nervous because because of the situation,
like me going to prison, Like I've never been that
type of a female in like high school or even
growing up, Like I was never that fighter. I was like,
you know, everybody loved me and I was like, you know,
very social, you know, stuff like that. So for me
to go to prison, I'm like, all right, I'm gonna

(32:44):
make this work. And at the same time, I'm in
a wheelchair, so I'm like, you know, I ain't trying
to come in here and look like no punk either.
But at the same time, I'm like, I got one job,
one job only to get in and out as quick
as possible number one and get out unscathed, and you know,
so but being in there, being in there, being that

(33:08):
I worked in the mail the male and also got
taught how to how to work for the system. I
knew how to I knew how to maneuver when I
was on when I was an inmate R Like you know,
I just like it was yeah, I just knew how.

Speaker 3 (33:24):
To maneuver, like not nothing.

Speaker 4 (33:26):
To be like sneaky or anything, just just know how
to like this is like this this is like this,
I know how to do this. So I just did
what I needed to do every day, and when it
was lights out, it was lights.

Speaker 3 (33:38):
Out for me. That was it?

Speaker 1 (33:40):
Right?

Speaker 2 (33:40):
How did the inmates and how did the CEO treat
you knowing your background?

Speaker 4 (33:47):
The funny thing is that some of the CEOs that
were there were friends of mine. Were a few females
that were friends of mine because we were in the
academy together.

Speaker 2 (33:58):
That is crazy.

Speaker 4 (34:00):
Yeah, when I was in the hospital, you know, they
came with me, cried with me, you know, face timed me.
And then when I got in there, you know, they
had to do their job and I.

Speaker 3 (34:10):
Just act honestly.

Speaker 4 (34:11):
I just act like I didn't know them, and I
wanted them to act like they didn't know me. When
I was in prison, nobody knew I was to CEO
other than if you knew I was a CEO because
you went to the academy with me. Nobody knew that.
I kept that quiet for that whole time. MM, because
I seen what people did it to see you.

Speaker 2 (34:28):
That's what I'm saying. So, I mean, that's the beauty
of you knowing uh, because you used to work there,
so you knew how to navigate it because that's like
a survivor attacked it.

Speaker 3 (34:35):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (34:37):
But the funny thing, I always like I tell a story,
I'm like, you know, I actually I actually had to
become like I actually had to become them.

Speaker 5 (34:46):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (34:47):
And it wasn't on purpose, like just being around them
my eye.

Speaker 4 (34:50):
I became an inmate because that's how I had to
I had to move like the mo was gonna move
like a CEO being an inmate.

Speaker 3 (34:59):
I end up moving on the inmate.

Speaker 4 (35:00):
And then like when I came home, I was like,
I was honestly instant.

Speaker 3 (35:04):
It wasn't long, but I was.

Speaker 2 (35:07):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (35:08):
I was like, oh my god, like, oh my god.

Speaker 2 (35:11):
Yo, it's so funny you said that I was. I
used to work at this luxury store in the city
and this rapper came in right and he was okay,
trying to talk to me, but I was like counting
money or something, and this white guy, he didn't know
who this nigga was. He was standing right behind him
trying to check out. And so when I tell you that,
the rapper started like fucking bugging out, and I'm like, damn,

(35:34):
th thisse niggas because he's been in jail, like a
lot throughout the years, and I'm like, yo, he's really institutionalized.
So the white man, you know, he got uncomfortable, so
he went to the registered downstairs. And the black guy
was just like the rapper was like, you know, I
just don't like them people staying close to me. I
don't like it, like I need my personal states like that.
It's too much like I ain't trying to be rude.
And I was like, yo, that is a real thing.

Speaker 3 (35:56):
It's a real thing. And I got said. I wasn't
in there long.

Speaker 4 (35:59):
I did a year, but imagine the people that that
does more than that. I was only a year and
I was and I it became institutionalized when I came home,
like four years, No, four year sentence, four years oh okay, okay,
I got.

Speaker 3 (36:16):
Out on parole in a year.

Speaker 2 (36:17):
Okay, good, good, good, So thank god.

Speaker 4 (36:20):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (36:20):
Yeah, so in what ways did you notice that you
was institutionalized When.

Speaker 4 (36:24):
I came home and I'm like I'm out, and I'm
I'm like why, I'm like looking around like watching people
or just paranoid. Yeah, Like I'm like this is family,
Like why am I acting like this?

Speaker 3 (36:41):
Like it was?

Speaker 4 (36:42):
It was a lot of my mental was like so different,
and it was it was crazy because I couldn't.

Speaker 3 (36:49):
I didn't. I didn't even want to leave my house
to do anything.

Speaker 4 (36:52):
They were throwing me a surprise party, you know, when
I got out of prison, and they had to pretty
much tell me because I was like, I don't want
to leave home. I just felt like when I went
to prison, I was snatched, like my feelings like I
was snatched from my home.

Speaker 3 (37:06):
And then when.

Speaker 4 (37:08):
I finally came back, excuse me, when I finally came
back home, I'm like, I don't gotta go out no more,
Like I want to stay right here, like in my house.
It was a whole it was a whole mental thing though.
And like my mom and you know, family, and they're like,
we're gonna go out for a little bit.

Speaker 3 (37:22):
I'm like, I'm good, Like I stay home. I'm like, wait,
how long.

Speaker 4 (37:25):
We're gonna be out for like a couple of hours,
We're gonna come home?

Speaker 3 (37:28):
They like, dang, they like but they just worked with me,
and I didn't mean to do it.

Speaker 4 (37:33):
It was just it was a lot. It came through it.
It was a lot I didn't you know.

Speaker 2 (37:39):
You know, you also mentioned that in Women prisons, they're
not as accessible for people with disabilities as men, which
I found really interesting. Why do you think that is?

Speaker 3 (37:50):
I don't think I know that's number one.

Speaker 2 (37:52):
I mean yeah, because I'm like people disabilities are like
very commonly, you know what I'm saying. I'm just surprised
that places like everybody should be accessible for those who
have disabilities.

Speaker 3 (38:03):
Correct. So at this point, so.

Speaker 4 (38:11):
When I was trying to work on getting parole, I
was I was trying to get these different classes to
work and and do so when parole came up, they
could see it on my papers and stuff, like, you know,
she's just not in here, she's doing X Y Z. Well,
these classes were places where I ate, like I could
I could walk up the steps and they and they didn't.

Speaker 3 (38:34):
They couldn't take.

Speaker 4 (38:35):
Me up the steps in my wheelchair because this is
an old prison and a.

Speaker 3 (38:38):
Lot of things are just messed up.

Speaker 4 (38:40):
So they're not letting another inmate do that and not
trying to get no lawsuits and and an officer's not
going to do it. So these places that they were
having these classes weren't accessible for for uh, someone with disability.
But so I had made a I had made a
big stink about it.

Speaker 3 (38:58):
And I'm like, you know.

Speaker 4 (38:59):
When paro come around, how'mna sit there and tell them
like I didn't get to do nothing due to the
fact that because I can't get to there. It's not
because I don't want to. I can't get to.

Speaker 2 (39:10):
That physically can't get there.

Speaker 3 (39:12):
I physically can't do it.

Speaker 4 (39:14):
And there have been other women that came through there
that didn't care to, I guess want to try to
work hard to get out or try to get these
different things like Okay, I'm in the wheelchair. They said,
we can't get up here. I'm just not gonna go
not me, not me. I'm trying to do something. I'm
trying to be productive.

Speaker 3 (39:29):
I'm trying to go home. Yeah yeah, fastest way, best
way possible.

Speaker 4 (39:34):
So I had wrote the Unbossman and and the crazy
thing is I ended up getting I ended up getting
sent to go to the halfway house. The day I
was packing to go to the halfway house, something went
through that they have for disability, the disability women UH

(39:55):
to have classes in another area where you know, the
women that that are disabled, that are in the wheelchairs
will be able to go to that area to UH
to get the classes for for whatever we needed to class,
but now I was leaving, but I did something and
hopefully they still they still got that for the for

(40:15):
the women that are there.

Speaker 2 (40:17):
Yeah, I can only imagine how many times you probably
felt hopeless a lot.

Speaker 4 (40:23):
Yeah, even still to today sometimes mm hmmm, just like
it just sometimes it hits me. That's why I say,
sometimes I gotta go back and look and see different
things that I've done to let myself know, like you
still hear like you're you did it, You're doing it,
like continue to do it, but don't stop stop being

(40:44):
so hard on yourself, like what like it's okay, Like
everybody keeps saying to me, a lot of people would
have gave up, like you didn't give up. The fact
this isn't that and giving up is never was never
an option, like when they my doctor was just like, yeah,
she's definitely heavily medicated. Because I kept like, I kept

(41:07):
telling him, oh yeah, like I'm going to walk again,
and he was like, I don't know she's gonna walk.

Speaker 3 (41:11):
I'm like I'm gonna walk. They're like he's like a
little high. I'm like no, I'm not probably in but right.

Speaker 4 (41:21):
Walk you see me you know, after everything was all
set and done and I came in there, he came
in that room, had his paper, was like, this is
the same person.

Speaker 3 (41:33):
I'm like, how you doing that? He's like, yo, you
can't be the same person. I was like, you caught
me at a bad time. I don't look like that one.
I don't look like that on a normal basis. Like
it's right right. He was like wow.

Speaker 4 (41:47):
And then he watched the progression of me me like
walking and the determination.

Speaker 3 (41:52):
Yeah, and he was like wow. He like back and like,
look at my work.

Speaker 4 (41:58):
I'm like, congratulate yourself to like this was a good teamwork,
Like I.

Speaker 3 (42:02):
Didn't give up.

Speaker 4 (42:03):
You didn't give up on me, because you could have
been gave up on me and say I'm not watching
this young lady's leg out no more. I'm tired of
washing it out. It's the fact that we're gonna cut
it off and be done with it. Like he never
felt like that.

Speaker 3 (42:15):
Every time it was something he was he was so
into it, like this is what we're gonna do. This
is what we're gonna do.

Speaker 4 (42:21):
I love my doctor, Like when I from my book
and when I get when I get like big on
stage and have my big break with my motivational speaking,
like he's going to be there in the crowd.

Speaker 3 (42:32):
I need to give that man his his the love
because he did it. He did it.

Speaker 2 (42:38):
Yeah, No, that's amazing. I'm pretty sure your situation probably
reminded him of why he wanted to become a doctor,
like you reminded him of his purpose. Because everybody, that's
the fact that you're still here, and like, you know,
nobody wants to do a year in jail, but you
didn't have to do your four years. Like I always
tell people that there there there is beauty and brokenness,
you know like that. Yes, yeah, Now did you have

(43:03):
any like did you make any friends or do you
feel like anybody like looked out after you as far
as like the inmates when I was in there, Yeah, yeah,
I did.

Speaker 4 (43:11):
I actually have a couple of people that I actually
still talked to me jo and everything. I got to
two of my bunkies actually we jpe and then one
of my bunkies and we actually take Yeah everybody.

Speaker 2 (43:26):
You know, everybody know you know, you know, right.

Speaker 4 (43:30):
But yeah, and one of the one of the females
when I was there, she just was like from from
from the beginning, she was like just a great help
and we just met because I'm in my wheelchair. They
used to call me hot Wheels because I used to
like just on around and there just like just you know,
and they like hot will. And then that's when me
and her ended up like just getting cool. And then

(43:52):
she would like squok in a microwave for me and
stuff and just like and then we just end up
getting closer because at one point I was by myself,
like I did want to talk to nobody.

Speaker 3 (44:01):
I didn't know nobody and stuff.

Speaker 2 (44:02):
You know, you're just trying to make it. Yeah, come
back home, right right.

Speaker 4 (44:07):
And then when I started getting a little comfortable and
like started opening up, and then you know, and then
we end up becoming like really cool. And when it
was time for me to leave, they helped me to
go to the Headway house. They helped me pack off
and everything. Yeah, they didn't know I was a CEO.
Like she never knew I was a CEO, but now
yeah she knows now. She was like what did She

(44:27):
was like, right, she.

Speaker 3 (44:29):
Was like, you said you worked for the state.

Speaker 2 (44:32):
I said I did, Yeah, you just never you didn't
ask the right follow up of course, like.

Speaker 4 (44:40):
You know, I said work for the state. She's like,
and you told me you were a teacher. I was right,
just different things. I just kept out of the story,
you know.

Speaker 2 (44:59):
But were you surprised by the friendships there? Because you
know what, people always have these ideas of how prison is,
how people in prison are. So the am that surprised you.

Speaker 3 (45:09):
Of me making friends or whatever?

Speaker 2 (45:11):
Just mean like genuine people that like the fact that
you even still keep in contact with these people?

Speaker 4 (45:16):
You know, right, No, because whether there or whatever, I
give people a benefit of out. I know, when you're
in there, you are on survival mode. So I know
people might have like a vendetta or whatever. So you know,
I'm on my one two two to watch myself. But
when you find genuine, you find genuine. And then when

(45:37):
I didn't really feel like these certain people might have
been on a different one too, I just thisance myself.
I'm like, I'm gonna be here long, Like you know,
it might be different when it was a couple of times,
like different women wanted to try to get bucking, try
to argue with me and all that, try to make
a whole big thing. I'm not arguing with you, because
well they know how much time because you never tell
somebody how much time you got because they try to

(45:58):
take your time up.

Speaker 2 (46:00):
I'm like that's a fact.

Speaker 3 (46:01):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (46:02):
So I'm like, I don't got time to argue with
you and get into some fight or some trouble.

Speaker 3 (46:07):
And now I'm gonna really be in here for four
years over now, because you're in here for thirty Like
you don't care.

Speaker 2 (46:14):
That's crazy, Like you.

Speaker 4 (46:15):
Don't care, like you know, so like I just never
tried to get into like that little caddy stuff that's going.

Speaker 2 (46:21):
Yeah, I'm like, you know what, girl, God bless you
got it.

Speaker 3 (46:25):
Yeah that's what.

Speaker 4 (46:28):
And they was like, yeah, well, Danita, you you you
wasn't even trying to do this, so you was probably lying.

Speaker 3 (46:33):
You're right, that's what you think, you right.

Speaker 2 (46:35):
Like right, we're both here trying to be here all day,
so it don't matter what we think, right, Like you
got in mind right, Like.

Speaker 3 (46:45):
I don't care what y'all think. You're not you're not
doing all that to me, make me out of my comfort.

Speaker 2 (46:49):
I don't even know you trick your spot.

Speaker 3 (46:51):
Yeah, I don't know you that long, Like I don't
care that.

Speaker 2 (46:55):
Much, you know, I can only imagine how many times.
You probably thought about the scenario over and over again.
So how did you cope with accidentally taking somebody life
mentally and emotionally a lot? Because I know that I
know they had to really weigh down on you a.

Speaker 4 (47:10):
Lot of prayer, a lot of prayer, and then thinking
about how I've seen the family act towards me, so
I know they felt the type of way which also
weighed on my mental So I just knew I wanted
like to forgive myself and just pray and just hoping
that they would forgive me too, and just kind of

(47:32):
just move and like navigate in life, in my and
my feelings and just I just when I went to
when I went to prison, I was clean, be king
orry closer to God.

Speaker 3 (47:42):
Yeah, I was. I was.

Speaker 4 (47:43):
I mean, we're already a family. That's that's you know, Christ,
like anybody perfect. I ain't saying we like holdier than down.

Speaker 2 (47:51):
Right, but but you had a relationship with Him.

Speaker 4 (47:54):
Yeah, And I end up like I knew what God
can do. He gave my mam a heart transplanting and
my mama kidney.

Speaker 3 (48:02):
Uh.

Speaker 4 (48:03):
God just been good to our to our family, and
I just seen what He did for them so but
I had to trust God for myself, like for him
for what he could do for me.

Speaker 3 (48:15):
And when I just seen just how he just covered
the doctors and and and let.

Speaker 4 (48:21):
Them have a good intelligence what they needed to do
with my legs. And even though I went to prison,
like you know, nothing never happened to him and him
just keeping me covered, like I did go through a
lot of these things, but a lot of things didn't
happen to me too, and this is yeah, it could
have been this, it could have been that. So I
end up trusting God for me and not for what

(48:42):
I seen him do for others. And then my whole,
my whole mentality change and I'm just like, you know what,
all right? Because I was mad. I was mad at
I was like, I didn't prayed, I didn't do this,
I didn't do that. I am fast, I'm hungry, and
I'm went in prison like I was mad, crying and
my mom was just like, you know, go ahead and cry.

(49:04):
I'm in prison crying on the phone. Should I go
ahead and cry? God be here when you're ready.

Speaker 5 (49:09):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (49:09):
I'm like, I don't even mention his name. And then
it just clicked and I was like Okay, I'm better now.
She said, Okay, you're better.

Speaker 2 (49:15):
I'm like, yeah, are you at peace?

Speaker 5 (49:17):
Though?

Speaker 3 (49:18):
Yes? Well what the situation?

Speaker 2 (49:21):
Yeah, just what everything you've been through with the situation
with the person losing his life? Like, yes, what did
that look like for you.

Speaker 3 (49:31):
That happened?

Speaker 2 (49:33):
When did you know you was at peace?

Speaker 4 (49:37):
When I was in prison and I let and I
let everything go, and I was just like, you know what,
because I because I because that family, just knowing that
they had that control over me of whether I'm going
to go to prison or not and all that like
that was a that was like a rough feeling, like

(49:58):
just knowing that somebody could have that control over you
because they didn't like they didn't like me, you know,
because of the situation. But after everything had happened, I
just pretty much was just like you know, God, I'm gonna.

Speaker 3 (50:11):
Just leave it in your hands.

Speaker 4 (50:13):
Your will is your way, and anything that happens from
here on out, like I'm just trusting you. It's just
it's just all but you. And then I just just
do everything. I just threw everything out, like just do
everything out. It was just like I'm fine, Like you know,
I took accountability. I'm doing the time, like you know,
I don't want no trouble, like everything is good and

(50:35):
I just let it go.

Speaker 3 (50:36):
I just let it go. And it was just like
all right, I could.

Speaker 4 (50:38):
Wake up and be like, you know, because I know
I didn't do it on purpose, there was no purpose.
And then on top of that being facts, there was
no drugs and alcohol, So.

Speaker 3 (50:47):
I don't have that. I don't have that like hanging.

Speaker 4 (50:49):
Over me, like, oh, I wish I didn't do this.
I wish I didn't do that. No, like it wasn't.

Speaker 2 (50:54):
Have you ever been in an accident before.

Speaker 3 (50:57):
Yes, I was in an accident.

Speaker 4 (51:00):
In two thousand and four my car hydro plane and
flicked okay and landed. But the only thing that came
out of that was me having a broken ankle.

Speaker 3 (51:13):
That was like crazy because.

Speaker 2 (51:15):
The reason why I asked it because I'm just thinking
like if they would have did their due diligence, they
would have seen that you really didn't have a record,
like of course because of the weather were going all hydroplane.
But like the fact that you were treated this man
you had to you know, obviously use being accountable, but
it was also like damn, like it was truly an accident.

Speaker 4 (51:34):
Right, Yeah, if they would have pulled, they would have pulled, uh,
you know, just different things.

Speaker 3 (51:39):
They would have seemed like I'm.

Speaker 4 (51:40):
Not I'm not in I'm not record right right, I said,
I ain't on paper for nothing.

Speaker 5 (51:45):
Mmm.

Speaker 2 (51:46):
So since gaining your freedom, because you were free on
the same day four years later that you were arrested,
what was the most difficult part about adjusting to life
after prison?

Speaker 3 (52:02):
Good question. I don't.

Speaker 4 (52:06):
I don't other than being institutionalized. Like I said, I
don't think it was really hard to adjust. I didn't,
but I did have a lot of trust issues even
with people, like you know, just not knowing or not
sure my trust. My trust did change and how I

(52:28):
looked at people. But just to adjust back to to
life again, it kind of came pretty pretty easy because
like my family, they tried to like put me back
into into life. Likes soon as I came out, like
I think Telfair was out and all that, so they got.

Speaker 2 (52:46):
Me like I'm like, what's this.

Speaker 3 (52:51):
My sister's like this is out right now, and I'm like,
who is it? There's like right, I'm like I don't know,
you know.

Speaker 4 (52:58):
Then hearing these news, well they were new to me
and listening to the songs.

Speaker 3 (53:02):
I'm like, oh, this song is hot.

Speaker 4 (53:04):
They like, this is old. I'm like, it's new to me.
Stopped doing I stop doing that, y'all gotta get me
some grace here, like you know. But the family, they
they was, they was like by my side and helped
me to get back and as fast as I could
or easy as I could to try to make make
it like everything was still normal. They didn't try to
make me uncomfortable or anything that You're trying to make

(53:27):
me feel as normal as possible to get back.

Speaker 2 (53:29):
Yeah, I would think also, you know, with you also
having issues with trusting people, but I would say that
you would probably didn't trust being in cars anymore. That's
what con Yeah, because I would be nervous as hell getting.

Speaker 3 (53:43):
That's so much time.

Speaker 4 (53:45):
And the crazy thing is when they when I had
first went from the hospital to the rehabilitation center in Philly,
they had me in the back of the ambulance and
I was just like, I can't, like, I can't, I can't,
I can't, Like I was just nervous just being in
in that That was the first time the fart since
the accident.

Speaker 3 (54:04):
And then when I finally went home.

Speaker 4 (54:07):
My dad comes picked me up from Philly and he's
probably driving like speed, living on the highway. Like I'm
just so nervous. I'm like, okay, okay, okay, okay, Like
but as time went on, time went on, and but
bind you, this is years though of time going on.

Speaker 3 (54:21):
Then it makes then it then it got easier.

Speaker 4 (54:23):
But even still to this day, if I'm driving and
there's another car just like coming to me in that
type of like laying the way it was, it makes
me nervous, like I'll slowing down. I'm trying to see
what are they about to do so I can figure
out what I'm going to do. I just hope you're
just going to keep going straight because like you know,
but yeah, I'm still nervous to this day, like I can't.

(54:46):
I hate I hate that type of streak where where
it looks like somebody's coming to me that doesn't I
don't like that.

Speaker 2 (54:52):
I mean it's triggering, like I only imagine how you
like tense up. Yes, yeah I do. Did you first
realized that walking again might be possible?

Speaker 5 (55:09):
Hmm?

Speaker 3 (55:09):
Good question.

Speaker 4 (55:11):
When I when I could take when I could take
a few steps with my walker but it was like hard.

Speaker 3 (55:18):
Few steps, but a few steps with my walker.

Speaker 4 (55:23):
When I was able to do my when I was
able to stand for the first time, like doing.

Speaker 3 (55:28):
You know, like a get up and stand or whatever.
When I was able to.

Speaker 4 (55:31):
Do that, I'm like, oh, we getting somewhere. Like we're
getting somewhere. But it took time and all that to
even get there. Like at one point I couldn't even
wook on my toes, like that's how it started out.
I had to start out exercise trying to woogie your
toes and I do that for a long time. So
this process was years years years like me now and

(55:53):
I'm probably walking good now for like two years and.

Speaker 3 (55:58):
This is eight years.

Speaker 2 (56:00):
Wow. And are you able to drive? Yeah, that's amazing.

Speaker 4 (56:06):
But they took time to get behind the wheel though
I didn't. I didn't want to, but I didn't want to.
I was like, yeah, yeah, I'm good. I don't got
to drive U lest other people drive me around.

Speaker 3 (56:16):
But then I'm like, I was you gotta pick me up?

Speaker 2 (56:21):
I'm like, I ain't driving me up.

Speaker 3 (56:25):
Telling you.

Speaker 4 (56:26):
I was like, then I like my independence though, yeah,
confident and started getting that that confidence back. I was like, yeah,
I'm not trying to have nobody keep I don't want
nobody know where I'm going, what I'm doing, Let me learn,
let me get back behind this wheel again.

Speaker 3 (56:40):
I'm good.

Speaker 2 (56:41):
Yeah. Did you lose any friends or family members over this?

Speaker 4 (56:47):
No?

Speaker 3 (56:47):
Everybody.

Speaker 2 (56:48):
I feel like everybody was prett supportive.

Speaker 4 (56:50):
Everybody was of support. Nobody nobody did anything and they're
still a support. Yeah, there's still a support.

Speaker 2 (56:56):
M So, how has this experience has changed the way
you view life and second chances?

Speaker 3 (57:04):
It really shows how life can change for.

Speaker 4 (57:07):
You, Like at the blank vana facts like you you
know that, but you when you're in it, then you
really realize like, oh my god, like I was just
walking and just doing this and that this day, and
now the next day I'm disabled, can't work and learning

(57:28):
how to walk and went to prison, like all that
just happened just like that for me, you know, So
it it changed my men, It just lets you know
how things can happen in your life and when you
least expected. But even with that happening, you know, I

(57:52):
think everybody deserves a checking second chance, depending on what
the different things are, you know, because mistakes happen. Nobody's perfect,
but it's like with how you act and what you
do with those like mistakes, like are you are you
cocky with the mistake and like, well yeah I did this,
I don't care.

Speaker 3 (58:12):
Well if this happened, then it's just like you know what,
who cares?

Speaker 2 (58:15):
Like don't force Gud's hand out.

Speaker 3 (58:17):
Yeah yeah, you know.

Speaker 4 (58:18):
But when you like humble and you know, like different
things like I think that like people deserve second chances
and and you can overcome anything. And that sounds so cliche,
and I would have said I wouldn't have said that
prior to this situation because I'm like, oh, that's cliche,
Like you said say that because you succeeded on something.

Speaker 3 (58:41):
But then when you go through something and then you succeeded,
you be.

Speaker 2 (58:44):
Like yoich be hidden different right.

Speaker 3 (58:48):
Like you can really overcome like you can.

Speaker 2 (58:52):
But do you feel like this this situation gave you
a deeper understanding of your life's purpose?

Speaker 3 (58:58):
Yes?

Speaker 4 (58:59):
Yeah, because I always wanted to do not like podcasts,
for say, but like I always want wanted to be
in that like communications, because that's what I first went
to college for, is like communications, So like the journalisms
and the interviews.

Speaker 3 (59:16):
I always actually like wanted to do radio and stuff.

Speaker 2 (59:20):
So look at guy using you to share your story
on other people.

Speaker 4 (59:24):
Right, you know, it's like wow, Like prior to this accident,
I didn't have a story to be able to do
this with for this, for this to happen.

Speaker 2 (59:36):
But now the story you just that you had to
just rediscover it in a different way. Okay, Okay, we
all got a story.

Speaker 4 (59:43):
Yeah we are everybody. You're right, everybody has everybody has
a story. But yeah, but this story is is a
lot better than I guess.

Speaker 2 (59:55):
I mean it definitely.

Speaker 3 (01:00:00):
I appreciate that, because I appreciate that.

Speaker 2 (01:00:03):
And last, but not least, what message would you share
with someone struggling to forgive themselves for a tragic mistake,
Because this is what I broke a lot of people.

Speaker 4 (01:00:17):
Take your time, give yourself grace. You're not perfect, nobody's perfect.

Speaker 3 (01:00:29):
You're a human.

Speaker 5 (01:00:33):
You know.

Speaker 4 (01:00:33):
Just continue to pray or you know, if that's what,
if that's what they do, continue to pray and take
one day at a time, and if one day is
too long, do one hour. If one hour is too long,
to do one minute, one minute is too long, to
one second, however you gotta do it.

Speaker 3 (01:00:49):
Just take your time.

Speaker 2 (01:00:51):
Yeah, this was amazing. I'm so happy we were able
to do this like this. I'm almost done with my
season two and this was like, this was fire. So
I really appreciate you for allowing me to be a
part of your story.

Speaker 3 (01:01:04):
I appreciate you too. You fly, you fly. It was fun.

Speaker 4 (01:01:11):
Yeah, you was Funah Okay. I was so nervous because
I was like, oh my god, I didn't get the link.
I'm like, you're probably gonna think I'm playing. I was like,
I ain't playing. I was like, I can't find it.

Speaker 2 (01:01:23):
So she's talking about so when I reach out to people,
there's a system that I used to send like automatic alerts,
notifications remind us all that good stuff. And she wasn't
receiving anything. So I go to the program y'all and
the ship was turned off. Remind you, I don't turn
nothing off. So I'm like, yo, this has been like
the longest week. So then I sent her the link

(01:01:44):
to record via zoom and I sent it to her twice.
If she didn't receive it, I was like, yo, I
can't wait for Friday to come.

Speaker 3 (01:01:53):
You knew something?

Speaker 2 (01:01:54):
Yeah, yeah, because it was crazy, but I'm really excited
that we were able to do this because I always
tell people you never know how your storyline could be
someone else's lifeline. So I really appreciate this and I
just can't wait to see what everybody have to say.

Speaker 3 (01:02:08):
Thank you, thank.

Speaker 2 (01:02:09):
You, yes of course, and to the listeners, if you
have any questions, comments, or concerns, please make sure to
email me at hello at the pasgepodcast dot com. And
until next time, everyone, later later, okay, have a good
day on purpose. Okay. The Professional Homegirl Podcast is a

(01:02:34):
production of the Black Effect Podcast Network. For more podcasts
from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, app a podcasts, or
wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Don't forget to
subscribe and rate the show, and you can connect with
me on social media at the PG podcast

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Eboné Almon

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}I Accidentally Took Someone's Life