October 25, 2023 • 33 mins
Patrick Murphy is the Head Softball Coach at the University of Alabama. Coach Murphy has helped build the Crimson Tide program from the very beginning, leading the team to a National Championship, 24 straight NCAA appearances, and 17 Super Regionals. Entering his 28th year on the university's coaching staff, Patrick joins Nick to discuss why the best teammates experience vicarious joy in other people's success, reminding his players that they are people first and athletes second, and why he has the saying in his program, "Can you handle 30 seconds of embarrassment for a lifetime of learning?"
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
In our clubhouse, there's a saying right above the hallway
to the girls locker room. It says person and bold
all caps letters and then align and then athlete. So
person first, athlete second, and the sooner they realize that
it is the god honest truth that they're more important
to me as a person than an athlete. That's when
the magic happens.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
This is the Reform Sports Project, a podcast about restoring
healthy balance and perspective in all areas of sports through
education and advocacy. Hi, this is Nick Bonacor from the
Reform Sports Podcast. My guest today is Patrick Murphy, head
softball coach at the University of Alabama. Coach Murphy has
helped build the Crimson Tide program from the very beginning,
(00:46):
leading the team to a national championship victory, twenty four
straight NCAA appearances, and seventeen Super regionals. Entering his twenty
eighth year on the university's coaching staff, Patrick and I
discuss why the best teams experienced vis curious, joy and
other people's success, reminding his players that they are people
first and athlete second, and why he has to saying
(01:07):
in his program, can you handle thirty seconds? Of embarrassment
for a lifetime of learning. Man, I got another awesome
guest super up to have him head softball coach University
of Alabama coach Pat Murphy, Coach, thanks so much for
hopping on man.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
Nick, Thanks lot, coach, I got it.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Mean congratulations Alabama Hall of Fame, Sports Hall of Fame.
Last year, I think thirteen trips to the college. You know,
the softball College World Series Women's College World Series national
title in twenty twelve. Congrats, Like just an absolute dynamite program.
A lot of coaches, a lot of sports parents, a
lot of student athletes will listen to this, and coach,
I got to ask, with all that success that you've had, like,
(01:45):
how the hell do you start it? Like, I know
you've been with the program since the mid nineties, is
an assistant at Alabama, but like, how do you get
the sustained success that seems to be the secret of
the secret sauce that everyone's finding wanting to find?
Speaker 4 (01:56):
I should say, exactly, you know, this is starting year
twelve at the University of Alabama for me, and I
spent my probably first hour and a half of the
morning texting anybody that has been with me for that long.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
Every boss so I've had at Alabama my current boss,
doctor Karen Lee greg Burn, the athletic director at Alabama now.
But it's just been a labor of love for sure,
from day one, and it's been really really cool to
be able to start a Division one program from scratch.
And like you said, I was an assistant for the
first two years and then I took over in July
(02:32):
of ninety eight as the head coach.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
And been here ever since.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
But I think one of thet things is my associate
head coach, Alison Habits. She's been here for twenty five years.
She's been with me since I've been as head coach.
So the consistency in our program, our string coach Michelle Dilts,
she'sy to go on on year eighteen or nineteen with us.
So that consistency and the staff, the people, I think
(02:57):
that means a lot to the young ladies that come
here because you know, once you get used to our system,
we're pretty much going to be around, you know, for
your entire career. And you know, I remember the first
time we won the SEC And one of the coolest
traditions at Alabama is you get a ring at halftime
of a football game that next fall after you win
(03:17):
a conference championship.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
So here we are out of.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
The fifty yard line, the athletic director and the president
at the time are handing out rings to everybody on
the team, the staff, and then as we're walking off, Malmore,
the ad at the time, kind of puts his arm
around me.
Speaker 3 (03:33):
And he was a backup quarterback when Joe Naman played.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
At Alabama and he's been around Alabama athletics for a
long long time, and he kind of looked at me,
and I know it wasn't a negative thing, it just
was matter of factly he said, yeah, it's pretty cool,
you know, first SEC championship, but it takes a really,
really good program and a really good coach to win
(03:56):
another one. And you know, I kind of looked up
at him and I said, yes, sir, and then I thought,
you know what, I'm going to win another one, and
just year and year out. I look for the same
type of kid when we recruit. We want kids who
want to be here, because when they want to be here,
they're not going to look over their shoulder and think,
what if.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
They're going to be better academically, They're.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Going to be better socially and they're certainly going to
be better athletically.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
So we kind of stuck with the same formula from
day one.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
You know, as you're talking, it got me thinking about,
Like I mentioned to you before, I was fortunate enough
to play for Mike Fox and Scott Forbes and Charlie
Long and such at North Carolina Wesley and before coach
Fox took the job at University of North Carolina, and
we you know, it was Division three, but I mean,
we were in the World Series every year and we
were fortunately win a national title in nineteen ninety nine.
(04:44):
But I remember when I was a sophomore, one of
our freshmen at the time, we were about to win
the conference championship. You know, we're sitting there on the
edge of the dugout or whatever, and you know, you're
getting ready to, you know, go celebrate with your teammates,
and one of the freshmen looks at one of the
upper class was actually the ace of our staff and says, so,
what are we gonna do? You know, we're going to
dog pile and all that, and and the upper classman,
(05:06):
Sean Fleming shout out says to him, dude, we win
the conference championship. Here we dogpile for regional and national championships.
Speaker 1 (05:12):
That's it.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
You know, we just expect we're gonna go out there,
we're gonna shake hands, we're going to stop. But we
don't dog pile for that. And I've never forgotten that
story because you know, that was just the culture that
was created. It was an expectation to go back to
what you know, what you were describing, but that took
time for the coaching staff to build. What I have
found from my experience having played at a school that
where that was the expectation is that wasn't an expectation
(05:35):
put out by the coaching staff. That was an expectation
that the players understood, and really it was led by
the upper classmen, you know, getting the underclassmen in line.
How do you create that? Is that when you have
something really cooking, when when the players themselves or the
athletes themselves are kind of leading that mentality.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
Definitely, I think you said it perfectly.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
When a team's player led, I think it's going to
be a really really good team. And this was example
this year where we had a really good senior class,
including you know, Montana Fountain, you know, one of the
best pitchers in the country and Ali Shipman dashing praying
Faith Hensley, and you just kind of like, you know,
I think one of the best things we do at Alabama,
(06:15):
and we've done it for probably twenty years at least.
I don't even remember the last time we didn't do it.
But we do something called class dinners, And I used
to have the entire team come over to my house
the first week of school and I cooked dinner, and
you know, there'd be thirty thirty five people there. The
staff was invited and every time though, the new freshmen
(06:37):
would be sitting in a corner by themselves, like the
shyest kids at the junior high dance, scared of everything
and wouldn't say a peep, and you know, it was like,
oh my gosh, we got to do something different. So
the next year I did class dinners, where one class
at a time would come. So the seniors come to
(06:58):
my house first, I cooked, the juniors go to my
associate head coach's house, she cooked dinner. Sophomores go to
my pitching coach's house. They cook dinner, and then the
freshmen come to my house as well. And I read
one time in a book, and it was an educational
administration book, and I don't remember the name of it,
but there was a stat in there that just blew
(07:19):
me away, and it was if a freshman at any
college steps foot in a house within that community where
the college is, they're like eighty eight percent more likely
to return to that school the next year just by
feeling at home one time. You know, that doesn't matter
if it was a professor, a coach, whatever. And so
(07:41):
I want the freshmen to feel at home immediately. And
it's the first week of school. Some of them might
already be feeling homesick, but I want them to be able
to come to a house, you know, feel at home.
I usually cook one of their favorite meals and we
get going that way. But the seniors when they come over,
as the dinners get older, the biggest team throughout it
all is leadership. And basically the entire senior class dinner,
(08:05):
all we talk about is leadership and how we're going
to do it this year and how they're going to
do it. And I asked specific questions of what do
you think is holding you back right now as a
really good leader, And every senior has to say it
out loud and we take notes. It's very open. It's
sometimes it gets vulnerable with their answers, but we want
to hear that, so that consistency.
Speaker 3 (08:27):
Year after year after year.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
They started as a freshman at my house, we talk
a little bit about leadership. Then we go to the
sophomore class, talk about leadership there, junior, even more senior.
All it is about leadership, and I think it's helped
us year after year after year. And you know, we'll
do tweaks in the itinerary, but I've handled those out
and coaches clinics, and I think a lot of people
(08:49):
have found that they're very valuable for their team as well.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
So it just seems to use the word vulnerable, you know,
being vulnerable, or it sounds like you're trying to create
a safe space. So I make it comfortable. I know
what it's like to be a freshman, and you know,
it's very it's just new, right, it's new. It's it
could be overwhelming. There's a competitive piece in there. You're nervous,
you're trying to feel it out. You're no longer the
big fish in a small pond. Now you're just a
(09:13):
You're just a fish. Women with a usually just a
little fishwoman with a bunch of sharks trying to figure
it out and could be very intimidating. Do you let
some of it happen organically? Like do you do you
really try to coach your upper classmen how to handle
the underclassmen or is that something that evolves over time?
I mean, and I guess the next step of that
question is how much effort goes into on a day
(09:35):
to day basis really trying to build as much of
a relationship you can with those freshmen as they're onboarding
into the fall.
Speaker 3 (09:41):
Well, I think first thing.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
One of the things we do at the junior class
outing is we do this role playing game and there's
I think there's five scenarios that we have come up
with that have actually happened in the history of our program.
Speaker 3 (09:57):
And some of it's not so good. You know. Some
of it's typical of a team where somebody.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Is complaining in the dugout that they don't get to
play or they don't get to hit or something. And
you know the people that hear that the most are
the kids, the teammates.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
They're usually not complaining in front of the coach.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Right, So how do we equip the young ladies to
kind of deal with that? How do they respond to
somebody that says, you know, why aren't I playing? You know,
I hit really good in practice the other day and
it's happened. They're all like true stories. So the junior class,
we do this little game in front of my assistant
coaches fireplace.
Speaker 3 (10:36):
It's like the stage and two of the coaches are
the actors. We grab a junior. She goes up on stage.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
The two coaches talk about whatever the situation is, and
then they start to engage the junior and she has
to come up with what she would say to her
teammate in this situation. And it takes about five to
ten minutes each each little scenario, and then the others
clap for her and they sit down and we go.
Speaker 3 (11:04):
Okay, how do you think she handled it?
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Does anybody have something maybe that they would do differently
or say differently? How would you do it? And then
the coaching staff gives their opinions. Man, Nick, you handled
that perfectly. What you said at that time, that's money
right there. That was a perfect response.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
And then we go from there.
Speaker 1 (11:24):
So that is definitely something we do and it's usually
first week of September, so.
Speaker 3 (11:31):
They kind of have a little practice under their belt
with that.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
I forget the second part of your question, but we
do a lot of We have a team retreat in
the fall. We do a ton of team building. I
have a classroom actually in our building. Everybody's assigned a
chair at the beginning of the year.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
So that includes a freshman as well, like do you
go out of your way with freshmen in particularly just
keep it all together?
Speaker 3 (11:54):
Now.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
We also do like separate things for just a freshman,
and I'll pick like or four words that really mean
a lot to our program, like grit, legacy, Moodida, servant leadership,
and just the freshman will come to the classroom. I
literally set a timer on my phone and I'll say, Hey,
(12:16):
this is going to be twenty minutes.
Speaker 3 (12:18):
And if I'm still talking and my phone goes off,
you're free to go. We're done. And I usually have
a little story, I have a video.
Speaker 1 (12:28):
We'll maybe have an alum call in and have her
say what grit meant to her, what servant leadership meant
to her, what Medida means to her, and modida is
having vicarious joy in someone else's success, So the opposite
would be jealousy or envy, and we don't want any
of that in our clubhouse and our sport because I
think that's where teams die, when somebody becomes jealous and
(12:50):
then they become detached from the program and the team,
and it's.
Speaker 3 (12:54):
Just not a good thing.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
And I'm sure you realize that, but we really try
to teach the culture to the freshman right away.
Speaker 3 (13:01):
So then smooth sailing for the next three years?
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Is it?
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Modida Moudita named you.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
D I t a.
Speaker 2 (13:08):
I've never heard that before, and I got to tell you,
you know, because I've seen it in my professional life,
and it's like it doesn't matter whether it's a professional
life or whether it's in a locker room. And I
never understood this. I never took pleasure in seeing someone
else struggle, like I want to see someone succeed because
that reassures me that I can too. I just need
to do what they do. It's like I just got
(13:30):
to do what this person is doing. But there are
people out there, particularly in sports, people will pull for
someone to struggle, you know what, I mean, to get
their shop that I don't believe. I don't know of
anyone that ever succeeded as a result of that. But
that is something I'm so glad you brought that, something
that is real, and it goes on. How do you
balance that because, let's face it, in order to have
a really successful program, even for me in my last
(13:53):
couple of years, when I was the number one catcher
and I knew I was going to start, But you know,
coach with Tom, hey, we're bringing this other kid in.
It's almost like you want to keep some one on
the edge of their seat a little bit right, keep
a little sense of urgency so there's no complacency. But
how do you juggle that competition because you're recruiting new
players and everyone wants to start. But keep them where
(14:13):
they can balance the team aspect that and put aside
their ego if they just didn't win the job.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
Yes, so number one, we have to teach them what
the bigger picture is. You always have to have the
bigger picture of mind, and that's getting degree from the
University of Alabama, being a successful business person for forty
fifty years after you graduates.
Speaker 3 (14:34):
That's number one. You see the bigger picture.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Way too many kids and parents only see what's ten
feet in front of them, and that is just so
upsetting me when that happens and they don't realize the
bigger picture is what really truly matters, So we try
to hammer that home from the very beginning. The second
thing is, and sometimes this is more for parents than kids,
(14:58):
but we try to get our young laby. He needs
to understand they do not have to be on the
field to help us win. They do not have to
be playing in a game to help us win. I'm
gonna love you no matter if.
Speaker 3 (15:12):
You go zero for four, four for four, or are.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
The pinch runner in the sixth inning room. We need
to run, okay. And you know, in our clubhouse, there's
a saying right above the hallway to the girls locker room,
and it says person in bold all caps letters and
then align and then athlete. So person first, athlete second,
(15:36):
and it's in gold letters, and it's the only thing
in our entire clubhouse that's written in gold. Okay, because
it's not important to us, And the sooner they realize
that it is the god honest truth that they're more
important to me as a person than an athlete, that's
when the magic happens. The sky's the limit with the team,
the young lady, but I have to do things. I
(15:57):
have to say things, the team to say things.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
We're really really.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
Big in affirmation, and it just it kind of has
snowballed over the years. But this fall or last ball,
when we started, it was team twenty seven, which is
the twenty seven to year valve by the Softball At
the very first team meeting, I remember saying I want
affirmation to be just as easily talked about as accountability.
So we do something called prompts and own its at
(16:24):
the end of every practice.
Speaker 3 (16:26):
So I'm going to give Nick.
Speaker 1 (16:27):
A prompt and then you say what you loved about Nick, okay,
And then when everybody's done with the props, I'll say, Okay,
somebody have an own it. And that means they're going
to take accountability for maybe a mistake that day, or
maybe they didn't go so hard for a ground ball
or a fly ball, or they didn't die for a
ball or whatever it is. So the props are really
(16:49):
quite easy and they flow, and it's awesome to see
and they're really good at it.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
You know. I was really proud of this team.
Speaker 1 (16:55):
But then when you come to the own it's it's
not as many, and usually it's maybe one, and then
maybe the third day there's two, and then maybe the
two weeks into it, there's like four people, and then
you know, I really believe that if I can affirm
the behavior I love in you, Nick, I should be
able to turn around and say, Nick, you got to
(17:17):
be better, dude. We need you to win because I
just affirm something that truly truly love in you. And
another thing that we always say is you can't be
fake about it. You have to be genuine with either
your praise or you know, let's.
Speaker 3 (17:32):
Get your head out of your butt.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
So if they realize that they're coming from a good place,
and when they affirm you, it should be the same
exact thing when they hold you accountable for something. I
think it's really really hard for kids nowadays to be
able to accept the criticism.
Speaker 3 (17:46):
They can take the praise right, but to be able
to take the accountability and.
Speaker 1 (17:51):
The criticism as easily as the affirmation. It just does
wonders for a team, and this team this past year
for us was probably one of the best I've ever
had with those two words.
Speaker 2 (18:03):
When we come back Coach Murphy and I discuss self
esteem and how parent egos can negatively impact their child's success.
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we left off, Patrick and I were about to talk
about why he values the intangibles that potential recruits bring
(19:06):
to the team and the importance of athletes taking eight
weeks off throughout the year. You're kind of you're getting
me fired up, because I mean, I love when I hear,
especially folks at your level who are so successful, say
things that it's like God, you know, I believe in it,
you know, and I've lived it, and it's what I
try to be. And you're not perfect at it. But
(19:27):
you know, as a parent and as someone I have
six kids, a lot of the audience knows that anywhere
from my oldest is eighteen, youngest is going to be
five here soon. It's like, you love your kids. Now,
I'm a little bit different. I don't like to see
them struggle, but I look at struggle as a gift,
you know. I look at struggle as a learning opportunity.
I look at struggle as this is an opportunity to
(19:47):
get better and no matter what it is. But it
is very different, especially in the youth. And I hear
a lot of nightmare stories in the travel softball realm
where everyone's chasing that thing and and that scholarship piece
or whatever, and you know, and that god that chase
starts a day nine ten years old. With parents, and
you know, it's hard as a parent of times to
(20:08):
not look at your kid as if they can't do
any wrong right, the world revolves around them. How important
isn't though, for parents to allow coaches to coach their
kid and to allow them to struggle. And have you
had experiences where you've had kids come on campus where
they've had very little, if any adversity, and they've been
(20:28):
told they're great their whole life, and they get there
in the first sign of struggle that they fold. And
the opposite, how many kids have you seen really really struggle,
had to really work their tail off, and then they
click on all cylinders when they get on campus because
this isn't a new struggle for them.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
Both of those.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
But the thing that I still like would bring to
the forefront with all this is the parent has to
realize that, you know, the coach.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
Is going to love their kid no matter what she does.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
So it's okay if she's hitting two fifty because the
coach is okay. I think way too many times, self esteem, ego,
you name, it is all wrapped up in batting average
or eer and I've heard it, I've seen it. You know,
I've seen a young lady give up a home run
and a travel ball Toronto and the dad literally punches
(21:22):
a tree that's next to him.
Speaker 3 (21:24):
That's just not good.
Speaker 1 (21:25):
Or the young lady goes oh for four and on
the ride back to the hotel, not a word is
said in a car, So all she's thinking to herself
is my dad only loves me.
Speaker 3 (21:35):
If I go four for four or gets a hit.
Speaker 1 (21:38):
That's just not a good, good path to go down
as a parent. You know, one of the books that
I recommend to any gentleman that has daughters. And our
equipment manager just told me yesterday that he's having a daughter.
I said, okay, dude, I got a book for you.
And it's called Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters, as by a
doctor Meg Meeker, and it's m E E K E R.
(22:03):
And I've read it probably ten times, and it seems
like and I don't know how many girls you have
or what's the ratio of the kids, but.
Speaker 2 (22:09):
I got five boys, one girl, a lot of testosterone
in my house.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
Usually my baseball buddies, that's the opposite. They have three girls,
four girls, five girls, one boy or no boys. So
that's why I always recommend this book. But if the
parent is okay with the kid being a role player,
the kid will be okay with it.
Speaker 3 (22:29):
It's very, very.
Speaker 1 (22:30):
Difficult to get a kid to buy in to be
a member of the team, to be a part of
something bigger than what she is if the parent is
not okay with it, and that is just unfortunately, because
usually the kids are okay. The kids are fine, we
don't have to worry about the young lady. It's it's
unfortunately some parents that the ego gets in the way
(22:51):
and kind of ruins a good situation for the young lady.
Speaker 2 (22:54):
The pushback on that would be coach, you know, my
kids on a great team, and they need exposure because
they're not going to let the coach. Murphy's not gonna
see my daughter if they're not getting the same amount
of playtime. And I'm also paying big bucks, you know
for this, and it's just not fair and YadA, YadA, YadA,
YadA YadA, because let's face it, the exposure piece is
what I mean. I'm sorry, it seems like that is
(23:15):
exactly what drives a lot of this. The whole entire travel,
youth sports tourism industry that's you know, growing by leaps
and bounds, and it's a thirty billion dollar roughly industry.
It's projected by twenty twenty nine to be upwards of
an eighty billion dollar industry. So it's like, you're spending
all this money I want to return on my investment.
(23:36):
How do you coach to the life lessons when it's like,
because not for nothing, A lot of these parents are
being pitched the idea that hey play for me and
I got an in with coach Murphy or I'm just
using it as an example, but that happens all the time.
So a lot of times parents are are being manipulated
in some ways. You know, not in all cases, but
how do you navigate that?
Speaker 1 (23:55):
You know? And when we have camps and clinics, I
always say, if you want to play.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
At the next level, there's this for everybody.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
And you know an AIA schools win national championships, there's
JUCO national championships. Every level has a national championship, so
there's places for everybody. But you have to be honest
with yourself in terms of where is the spot where
I need to be?
Speaker 3 (24:19):
Okay, we have a.
Speaker 1 (24:21):
Saying in our program, can you handle thirty seconds of
embarrassment for a lifetime of learning? Because what I'm about
to tell you, Nick, you might be a little embarrassed
about it, but it's probably going to help you for
a lifetime, So I'll say that probably the first week
of school I'll use that saying, and then maybe in
the fall there's a time where I need to say,
you're a little short on this whatever the whatever the
(24:43):
situation might be. And then I'll say, do you remember
what I said about thirty seconds of embarrassment because it
could happen right now, But do you want a lifetime
of learning? And you know what the answer always is, yes, sir,
let me hear it. So you know, and we always
say you have to be truly honest to your teammates
in order to be a really good friend. You know,
(25:04):
you cannot beat around the bush. You have to be
able to be one hundred percent honest with your teammates
to help them out. That's that's what they want to hear.
They want to hear the honest truth. And I think
it was was it Joe Madden that had the quote
where it said, you know, if I lie to my players,
they're going to hate me for life. If I tell
them the truth, they might dislike me for two weeks. Sure,
(25:25):
you know, just got to tell them the truth all
the time, all right.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
I want to ask you this as a legend in coaching,
but obviously in the sport of softball. Set the record
straight for softball parents, like, does it matter if a
kid is a multi sport athlete or does it matter
if the kid's been playing softball year round since they're eight?
Do you have a preference? Do you think there is
(25:49):
any correlation to being a multi sport athlete or a
kid that specialized and plays a softball year around that
they're better or worse or is it all an individual
case by case? Like where do you stand and is
there a right or wrong?
Speaker 1 (26:02):
I absolutely love multi sport kids. Boy girl, I feel
like once you're done with your softball, baseball, basketball, whatever
it is that you play that you're like primary. I
think it gives your entire body, your mental outlook, everything,
a chance to be able to just take a deep breath.
Speaker 3 (26:21):
You know.
Speaker 1 (26:21):
Let's say you play baseball in the summer in the
fall and then you want to play basketball, Go for it.
Speaker 3 (26:28):
Do it.
Speaker 1 (26:29):
It's different muscles, and you know, one of the coolest
things about it is you might not start in basketball.
You're probably the top dog in baseball or softball, but
when it comes to basketball, you love it. But you're
like the six seventh to eight person. You know how
many life lessons you're going to learn there. But you know,
one of the questions we always ask every recruit is
(26:50):
have you always been in the starting lineup? And if not,
how did you handle that?
Speaker 3 (26:55):
What happened?
Speaker 1 (26:56):
You know?
Speaker 3 (26:57):
And almost every single time, obviously they start it in softball, but.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
Then the young lady will say, well, you know, I
did play basketball, and shoot, I really got on the court.
And then I said, well, how did you handle that?
She said, I loved it, I loved the team. We
were really good. So you know, you try to ask
all these leading questions because what I'm getting at is,
if you come here and you don't play, what is
it going to be like? Because best case scenario, Nick,
(27:24):
you're going to start every gamut catcher. Yeah, case scenario,
you're not going to play. How do you handle it?
And I don't think a lot of people think about it.
Speaker 2 (27:33):
When you you mentioned the recruiting piece of it, like
how much of an impact for you are the parents like?
Did an impact? Negatively? If dad is punching the tree,
are you like, dude, I don't want that guy? That's
that that could be a problem.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Yes, Unfortunately, that's not something that we would recruit. That's
not somebody we would recruit for sure. I like to
see they go over four and they strike out three times.
I'm usually trying to go as close to the dugout
as we possibly can to see how she's handling that.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
Does she go to the end of the dugout out
and throw her stuff or does she put her stuff, you.
Speaker 1 (28:10):
Know, in the helmet rack, put her bat down, take
her batting gloves off, and then get in the front
of the dug out and start cheering for the next kid.
Speaker 3 (28:16):
You know.
Speaker 1 (28:16):
I think you tell a lot by watching a kid
when they fail versus you know, the starters shoot, they
love and everything. Right, that's easy to be a starter.
The hardest thing is to not be a starter and
still pull for the team, you know, and can you
do that?
Speaker 2 (28:30):
So?
Speaker 1 (28:30):
And you know, the role player to me is the
reason why we win championships and why we're successful because
they have good vibe about them and they cheer for
the person in front of them. Now, they don't give up,
and they don't settle. Like you said at the very
beginning of this, I don't want anybody settling because then
it's kind of a waste of a spot on the roster.
Speaker 3 (28:47):
I want you to push the starter.
Speaker 1 (28:50):
Of the time and make her better because if you
both get better, the team is going to get better.
Speaker 3 (28:55):
Coach.
Speaker 2 (28:55):
As we wrap up here, you got the mic right,
You're a set in the stage, You're on the podium.
You're speaking to a room full of five hundred at
student athletes and their parents in there. You know, there
anywhere from eighth grade to a junior in high school.
These are all kids that want to come play at Alabama.
They want to play softball for you, or they just
want to get to the next level. What do they
have to do to get on your radar? What are
(29:17):
the things that you're looking for to be a part
of your program.
Speaker 3 (29:21):
Well, I think number one is.
Speaker 1 (29:24):
And it's probably the most boring thing in the world,
but be good at the fundamentals of anything in whatever
sports you're playing. So when a coach sees you, they
secret things and everything you know, and softball and baseball
season for me, throw run hit field, you know, like,
oh my gosh. And you should be able to walk
past a field and say, shure, that's an athlete. Wow,
(29:45):
look at her. I'll give you a little background on
that too. Is one of the questions we ask everybody
is if you come to Alabama, what type of intangible
would you bring to the program? And then I always say,
do you know what an intangible is? And sometimes they don't,
sometimes they do. Tangible is something you can't see, touch
or feel, and it's something inside you. A tangible thing
is when I walk across the field and I look
(30:07):
over my shoulder, I see, wow, she can throw, she
can hit, she can feel as an athlete, she can run.
But that's easy. Anybody can see that. You know, my
mom could walk across the field and say, wow, she's
a good athlete. But what I want to know is
what's inside you, which is the bigger picture. What would
you bring to the program if you came to us
that I don't know yet, Like what's inside your heart?
Speaker 3 (30:29):
What type of kid are you? What type of person
are you?
Speaker 1 (30:31):
What type of leadership trade could you bring that I
don't know about you? And when I asked that question,
the parents are just they know everything about the young
lady and they want to talk for her, and sometimes
they even like sit on their hands.
Speaker 3 (30:44):
Because they're about to talk.
Speaker 1 (30:45):
And I realize that the young lady needs to answer
the question. And some of the answers and Nick had
just been would just blow you out of the water.
It's just unbelievable. And those are the kids I want
in the program. But see the bigger picture. Work hard
on the fundamental obviously, kind to have the grades, you know,
to get any school, be a well rounded kid, because
there's way too many injuries nowadays, you know, after done
(31:08):
in high school, in summer ball, it's just way, way
too many.
Speaker 3 (31:10):
It's overused.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
You know, the best orthopedic in the world was doctor
Andrews and Birmingham and yeah, he had come over to
Alabama one time. They talk to all the string coaches
out like trainers and coaches because there was this rash
of shoulder injuries. And I'll never forget if he said,
you know, every athlete needs to take eight weeks off
of their activity in a year. Eight weeks, so put
(31:33):
down the football, put down the baseball, put down the bat,
whatever it is.
Speaker 3 (31:36):
And he didn't. He didn't mean he had to.
Speaker 1 (31:38):
Do it consecutively, like two months off, but just sit
it down and stay in shape.
Speaker 3 (31:43):
Whatever.
Speaker 1 (31:43):
And when I say that at coaches clinics, almost every
single time I get a coach who's usually a dad
that comes up and says, did you say eight.
Speaker 3 (31:51):
Days or eight weeks? And I spent eight weeks.
Speaker 1 (31:56):
Just take some time off, And it just it drives
me nuts when I see the tweets that say hashtag
no days off. Yes, there needs to be days off,
and a lot of them.
Speaker 2 (32:05):
I freaking love it. Doctor Andrews, that's the goat in
this space, and I've read his research and seen his works.
It's mine about Coach. I can't thank you enough for
coming on and sharing. You sound a lot. You and
coach I have Coach Tim Corbin on episode one, and
you guys have a lot in common. He talks a
lot about the classroom and you know, with his coaching,
philosophy and teaching, you remind me a lot of Coach Corps.
(32:29):
So guys are both stud So I can't thank you
enough for coming on to Sharon. This has been freaking awesome.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
I appreciate that, and that's a great comparison. I respect
the heck out of Coach Corbyn.
Speaker 2 (32:38):
Well, I wish you the best of luck, and you know,
I'm sure you're gonna have another hell of a year.
But I can't thank you enough.
Speaker 3 (32:43):
Coach, Thank you very much.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
That's Patrick Murphy, head softball coach at the University of Alabama.
Thanks for listening to the Reform Sports Podcast. If you've
enjoyed this episode, we would appreciate it if you took
a moment to rate and review our podcast. As we
work to grow our community of supporters and advocates for
more reform sports content, please subscribe to our newsletter and
blog at Reformsports Project dot com. You can also follow
(33:06):
us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and LinkedIn.
In our clubhouse, there's a saying right above the hallway
to the girls locker room. It says person and bold
all caps letters and then align and then athlete. So
person first, athlete second, and the sooner they realize that
it is the god honest truth that they're more important
to me as a person than an athlete. That's when
the magic happens.
Speaker 2 (00:26):
This is the Reform Sports Project, a podcast about restoring
healthy balance and perspective in all areas of sports through
education and advocacy. Hi, this is Nick Bonacor from the
Reform Sports Podcast. My guest today is Patrick Murphy, head
softball coach at the University of Alabama. Coach Murphy has
helped build the Crimson Tide program from the very beginning,
(00:46):
leading the team to a national championship victory, twenty four
straight NCAA appearances, and seventeen Super regionals. Entering his twenty
eighth year on the university's coaching staff, Patrick and I
discuss why the best teams experienced vis curious, joy and
other people's success, reminding his players that they are people
first and athlete second, and why he has to saying
(01:07):
in his program, can you handle thirty seconds? Of embarrassment
for a lifetime of learning. Man, I got another awesome
guest super up to have him head softball coach University
of Alabama coach Pat Murphy, Coach, thanks so much for
hopping on man.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
Nick, Thanks lot, coach, I got it.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Mean congratulations Alabama Hall of Fame, Sports Hall of Fame.
Last year, I think thirteen trips to the college. You know,
the softball College World Series Women's College World Series national
title in twenty twelve. Congrats, Like just an absolute dynamite program.
A lot of coaches, a lot of sports parents, a
lot of student athletes will listen to this, and coach,
I got to ask, with all that success that you've had, like,
(01:45):
how the hell do you start it? Like, I know
you've been with the program since the mid nineties, is
an assistant at Alabama, but like, how do you get
the sustained success that seems to be the secret of
the secret sauce that everyone's finding wanting to find?
Speaker 4 (01:56):
I should say, exactly, you know, this is starting year
twelve at the University of Alabama for me, and I
spent my probably first hour and a half of the
morning texting anybody that has been with me for that long.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
Every boss so I've had at Alabama my current boss,
doctor Karen Lee greg Burn, the athletic director at Alabama now.
But it's just been a labor of love for sure,
from day one, and it's been really really cool to
be able to start a Division one program from scratch.
And like you said, I was an assistant for the
first two years and then I took over in July
(02:32):
of ninety eight as the head coach.
Speaker 3 (02:34):
And been here ever since.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
But I think one of thet things is my associate
head coach, Alison Habits. She's been here for twenty five years.
She's been with me since I've been as head coach.
So the consistency in our program, our string coach Michelle Dilts,
she'sy to go on on year eighteen or nineteen with us.
So that consistency and the staff, the people, I think
(02:57):
that means a lot to the young ladies that come
here because you know, once you get used to our system,
we're pretty much going to be around, you know, for
your entire career. And you know, I remember the first
time we won the SEC And one of the coolest
traditions at Alabama is you get a ring at halftime
of a football game that next fall after you win
(03:17):
a conference championship.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
So here we are out of.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
The fifty yard line, the athletic director and the president
at the time are handing out rings to everybody on
the team, the staff, and then as we're walking off, Malmore,
the ad at the time, kind of puts his arm
around me.
Speaker 3 (03:33):
And he was a backup quarterback when Joe Naman played.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
At Alabama and he's been around Alabama athletics for a
long long time, and he kind of looked at me,
and I know it wasn't a negative thing, it just
was matter of factly he said, yeah, it's pretty cool,
you know, first SEC championship, but it takes a really,
really good program and a really good coach to win
(03:56):
another one. And you know, I kind of looked up
at him and I said, yes, sir, and then I thought,
you know what, I'm going to win another one, and
just year and year out. I look for the same
type of kid when we recruit. We want kids who
want to be here, because when they want to be here,
they're not going to look over their shoulder and think,
what if.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
They're going to be better academically, They're.
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Going to be better socially and they're certainly going to
be better athletically.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
So we kind of stuck with the same formula from
day one.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
You know, as you're talking, it got me thinking about,
Like I mentioned to you before, I was fortunate enough
to play for Mike Fox and Scott Forbes and Charlie
Long and such at North Carolina Wesley and before coach
Fox took the job at University of North Carolina, and
we you know, it was Division three, but I mean,
we were in the World Series every year and we
were fortunately win a national title in nineteen ninety nine.
(04:44):
But I remember when I was a sophomore, one of
our freshmen at the time, we were about to win
the conference championship. You know, we're sitting there on the
edge of the dugout or whatever, and you know, you're
getting ready to, you know, go celebrate with your teammates,
and one of the freshmen looks at one of the
upper class was actually the ace of our staff and says, so,
what are we gonna do? You know, we're going to
dog pile and all that, and and the upper classman,
(05:06):
Sean Fleming shout out says to him, dude, we win
the conference championship. Here we dogpile for regional and national championships.
Speaker 1 (05:12):
That's it.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
You know, we just expect we're gonna go out there,
we're gonna shake hands, we're going to stop. But we
don't dog pile for that. And I've never forgotten that
story because you know, that was just the culture that
was created. It was an expectation to go back to
what you know, what you were describing, but that took
time for the coaching staff to build. What I have
found from my experience having played at a school that
where that was the expectation is that wasn't an expectation
(05:35):
put out by the coaching staff. That was an expectation
that the players understood, and really it was led by
the upper classmen, you know, getting the underclassmen in line.
How do you create that? Is that when you have
something really cooking, when when the players themselves or the
athletes themselves are kind of leading that mentality.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
Definitely, I think you said it perfectly.
Speaker 1 (05:55):
When a team's player led, I think it's going to
be a really really good team. And this was example
this year where we had a really good senior class,
including you know, Montana Fountain, you know, one of the
best pitchers in the country and Ali Shipman dashing praying
Faith Hensley, and you just kind of like, you know,
I think one of the best things we do at Alabama,
(06:15):
and we've done it for probably twenty years at least.
I don't even remember the last time we didn't do it.
But we do something called class dinners, And I used
to have the entire team come over to my house
the first week of school and I cooked dinner, and
you know, there'd be thirty thirty five people there. The
staff was invited and every time though, the new freshmen
(06:37):
would be sitting in a corner by themselves, like the
shyest kids at the junior high dance, scared of everything
and wouldn't say a peep, and you know, it was like,
oh my gosh, we got to do something different. So
the next year I did class dinners, where one class
at a time would come. So the seniors come to
(06:58):
my house first, I cooked, the juniors go to my
associate head coach's house, she cooked dinner. Sophomores go to
my pitching coach's house. They cook dinner, and then the
freshmen come to my house as well. And I read
one time in a book, and it was an educational
administration book, and I don't remember the name of it,
but there was a stat in there that just blew
(07:19):
me away, and it was if a freshman at any
college steps foot in a house within that community where
the college is, they're like eighty eight percent more likely
to return to that school the next year just by
feeling at home one time. You know, that doesn't matter
if it was a professor, a coach, whatever. And so
(07:41):
I want the freshmen to feel at home immediately. And
it's the first week of school. Some of them might
already be feeling homesick, but I want them to be able
to come to a house, you know, feel at home.
I usually cook one of their favorite meals and we
get going that way. But the seniors when they come over,
as the dinners get older, the biggest team throughout it
all is leadership. And basically the entire senior class dinner,
(08:05):
all we talk about is leadership and how we're going
to do it this year and how they're going to
do it. And I asked specific questions of what do
you think is holding you back right now as a
really good leader, And every senior has to say it
out loud and we take notes. It's very open. It's
sometimes it gets vulnerable with their answers, but we want
to hear that, so that consistency.
Speaker 3 (08:27):
Year after year after year.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
They started as a freshman at my house, we talk
a little bit about leadership. Then we go to the
sophomore class, talk about leadership there, junior, even more senior.
All it is about leadership, and I think it's helped
us year after year after year. And you know, we'll
do tweaks in the itinerary, but I've handled those out
and coaches clinics, and I think a lot of people
(08:49):
have found that they're very valuable for their team as well.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
So it just seems to use the word vulnerable, you know,
being vulnerable, or it sounds like you're trying to create
a safe space. So I make it comfortable. I know
what it's like to be a freshman, and you know,
it's very it's just new, right, it's new. It's it
could be overwhelming. There's a competitive piece in there. You're nervous,
you're trying to feel it out. You're no longer the
big fish in a small pond. Now you're just a
(09:13):
You're just a fish. Women with a usually just a
little fishwoman with a bunch of sharks trying to figure
it out and could be very intimidating. Do you let
some of it happen organically? Like do you do you
really try to coach your upper classmen how to handle
the underclassmen or is that something that evolves over time?
I mean, and I guess the next step of that
question is how much effort goes into on a day
(09:35):
to day basis really trying to build as much of
a relationship you can with those freshmen as they're onboarding
into the fall.
Speaker 3 (09:41):
Well, I think first thing.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
One of the things we do at the junior class
outing is we do this role playing game and there's
I think there's five scenarios that we have come up
with that have actually happened in the history of our program.
Speaker 3 (09:57):
And some of it's not so good. You know. Some
of it's typical of a team where somebody.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Is complaining in the dugout that they don't get to
play or they don't get to hit or something. And
you know the people that hear that the most are
the kids, the teammates.
Speaker 3 (10:14):
They're usually not complaining in front of the coach.
Speaker 1 (10:16):
Right, So how do we equip the young ladies to
kind of deal with that? How do they respond to
somebody that says, you know, why aren't I playing? You know,
I hit really good in practice the other day and
it's happened. They're all like true stories. So the junior class,
we do this little game in front of my assistant
coaches fireplace.
Speaker 3 (10:36):
It's like the stage and two of the coaches are
the actors. We grab a junior. She goes up on stage.
Speaker 1 (10:44):
The two coaches talk about whatever the situation is, and
then they start to engage the junior and she has
to come up with what she would say to her
teammate in this situation. And it takes about five to
ten minutes each each little scenario, and then the others
clap for her and they sit down and we go.
Speaker 3 (11:04):
Okay, how do you think she handled it?
Speaker 1 (11:07):
Does anybody have something maybe that they would do differently
or say differently? How would you do it? And then
the coaching staff gives their opinions. Man, Nick, you handled
that perfectly. What you said at that time, that's money
right there. That was a perfect response.
Speaker 3 (11:23):
And then we go from there.
Speaker 1 (11:24):
So that is definitely something we do and it's usually
first week of September, so.
Speaker 3 (11:31):
They kind of have a little practice under their belt
with that.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
I forget the second part of your question, but we
do a lot of We have a team retreat in
the fall. We do a ton of team building. I
have a classroom actually in our building. Everybody's assigned a
chair at the beginning of the year.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
So that includes a freshman as well, like do you
go out of your way with freshmen in particularly just
keep it all together?
Speaker 3 (11:54):
Now.
Speaker 1 (11:54):
We also do like separate things for just a freshman,
and I'll pick like or four words that really mean
a lot to our program, like grit, legacy, Moodida, servant leadership,
and just the freshman will come to the classroom. I
literally set a timer on my phone and I'll say, Hey,
(12:16):
this is going to be twenty minutes.
Speaker 3 (12:18):
And if I'm still talking and my phone goes off,
you're free to go. We're done. And I usually have
a little story, I have a video.
Speaker 1 (12:28):
We'll maybe have an alum call in and have her
say what grit meant to her, what servant leadership meant
to her, what Medida means to her, and modida is
having vicarious joy in someone else's success, So the opposite
would be jealousy or envy, and we don't want any
of that in our clubhouse and our sport because I
think that's where teams die, when somebody becomes jealous and
(12:50):
then they become detached from the program and the team,
and it's.
Speaker 3 (12:54):
Just not a good thing.
Speaker 1 (12:54):
And I'm sure you realize that, but we really try
to teach the culture to the freshman right away.
Speaker 3 (13:01):
So then smooth sailing for the next three years?
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Is it?
Speaker 3 (13:05):
Modida Moudita named you.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
D I t a.
Speaker 2 (13:08):
I've never heard that before, and I got to tell you,
you know, because I've seen it in my professional life,
and it's like it doesn't matter whether it's a professional
life or whether it's in a locker room. And I
never understood this. I never took pleasure in seeing someone
else struggle, like I want to see someone succeed because
that reassures me that I can too. I just need
to do what they do. It's like I just got
(13:30):
to do what this person is doing. But there are
people out there, particularly in sports, people will pull for
someone to struggle, you know what, I mean, to get
their shop that I don't believe. I don't know of
anyone that ever succeeded as a result of that. But
that is something I'm so glad you brought that, something
that is real, and it goes on. How do you
balance that because, let's face it, in order to have
a really successful program, even for me in my last
(13:53):
couple of years, when I was the number one catcher
and I knew I was going to start, But you know,
coach with Tom, hey, we're bringing this other kid in.
It's almost like you want to keep some one on
the edge of their seat a little bit right, keep
a little sense of urgency so there's no complacency. But
how do you juggle that competition because you're recruiting new
players and everyone wants to start. But keep them where
(14:13):
they can balance the team aspect that and put aside
their ego if they just didn't win the job.
Speaker 1 (14:19):
Yes, so number one, we have to teach them what
the bigger picture is. You always have to have the
bigger picture of mind, and that's getting degree from the
University of Alabama, being a successful business person for forty
fifty years after you graduates.
Speaker 3 (14:34):
That's number one. You see the bigger picture.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Way too many kids and parents only see what's ten
feet in front of them, and that is just so
upsetting me when that happens and they don't realize the
bigger picture is what really truly matters, So we try
to hammer that home from the very beginning. The second
thing is, and sometimes this is more for parents than kids,
(14:58):
but we try to get our young laby. He needs
to understand they do not have to be on the
field to help us win. They do not have to
be playing in a game to help us win. I'm
gonna love you no matter if.
Speaker 3 (15:12):
You go zero for four, four for four, or are.
Speaker 1 (15:15):
The pinch runner in the sixth inning room. We need
to run, okay. And you know, in our clubhouse, there's
a saying right above the hallway to the girls locker room,
and it says person in bold all caps letters and
then align and then athlete. So person first, athlete second,
(15:36):
and it's in gold letters, and it's the only thing
in our entire clubhouse that's written in gold. Okay, because
it's not important to us, And the sooner they realize
that it is the god honest truth that they're more
important to me as a person than an athlete, that's
when the magic happens. The sky's the limit with the team,
the young lady, but I have to do things. I
(15:57):
have to say things, the team to say things.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
We're really really.
Speaker 1 (16:02):
Big in affirmation, and it just it kind of has
snowballed over the years. But this fall or last ball,
when we started, it was team twenty seven, which is
the twenty seven to year valve by the Softball At
the very first team meeting, I remember saying I want
affirmation to be just as easily talked about as accountability.
So we do something called prompts and own its at
(16:24):
the end of every practice.
Speaker 3 (16:26):
So I'm going to give Nick.
Speaker 1 (16:27):
A prompt and then you say what you loved about Nick, okay,
And then when everybody's done with the props, I'll say, Okay,
somebody have an own it. And that means they're going
to take accountability for maybe a mistake that day, or
maybe they didn't go so hard for a ground ball
or a fly ball, or they didn't die for a
ball or whatever it is. So the props are really
(16:49):
quite easy and they flow, and it's awesome to see
and they're really good at it.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
You know. I was really proud of this team.
Speaker 1 (16:55):
But then when you come to the own it's it's
not as many, and usually it's maybe one, and then
maybe the third day there's two, and then maybe the
two weeks into it, there's like four people, and then
you know, I really believe that if I can affirm
the behavior I love in you, Nick, I should be
able to turn around and say, Nick, you got to
(17:17):
be better, dude. We need you to win because I
just affirm something that truly truly love in you. And
another thing that we always say is you can't be
fake about it. You have to be genuine with either
your praise or you know, let's.
Speaker 3 (17:32):
Get your head out of your butt.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
So if they realize that they're coming from a good place,
and when they affirm you, it should be the same
exact thing when they hold you accountable for something. I
think it's really really hard for kids nowadays to be
able to accept the criticism.
Speaker 3 (17:46):
They can take the praise right, but to be able
to take the accountability and.
Speaker 1 (17:51):
The criticism as easily as the affirmation. It just does
wonders for a team, and this team this past year
for us was probably one of the best I've ever
had with those two words.
Speaker 2 (18:03):
When we come back Coach Murphy and I discuss self
esteem and how parent egos can negatively impact their child's success.
Before we head to break, I have a question for you.
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(18:23):
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(18:44):
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Team Snap customers with mid to large size organizations. Where
we left off, Patrick and I were about to talk
about why he values the intangibles that potential recruits bring
(19:06):
to the team and the importance of athletes taking eight
weeks off throughout the year. You're kind of you're getting
me fired up, because I mean, I love when I hear,
especially folks at your level who are so successful, say
things that it's like God, you know, I believe in it,
you know, and I've lived it, and it's what I
try to be. And you're not perfect at it. But
(19:27):
you know, as a parent and as someone I have
six kids, a lot of the audience knows that anywhere
from my oldest is eighteen, youngest is going to be
five here soon. It's like, you love your kids. Now,
I'm a little bit different. I don't like to see
them struggle, but I look at struggle as a gift,
you know. I look at struggle as a learning opportunity.
I look at struggle as this is an opportunity to
(19:47):
get better and no matter what it is. But it
is very different, especially in the youth. And I hear
a lot of nightmare stories in the travel softball realm
where everyone's chasing that thing and and that scholarship piece
or whatever, and you know, and that god that chase
starts a day nine ten years old. With parents, and
you know, it's hard as a parent of times to
(20:08):
not look at your kid as if they can't do
any wrong right, the world revolves around them. How important
isn't though, for parents to allow coaches to coach their
kid and to allow them to struggle. And have you
had experiences where you've had kids come on campus where
they've had very little, if any adversity, and they've been
(20:28):
told they're great their whole life, and they get there
in the first sign of struggle that they fold. And
the opposite, how many kids have you seen really really struggle,
had to really work their tail off, and then they
click on all cylinders when they get on campus because
this isn't a new struggle for them.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
Both of those.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
But the thing that I still like would bring to
the forefront with all this is the parent has to
realize that, you know, the coach.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
Is going to love their kid no matter what she does.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
So it's okay if she's hitting two fifty because the
coach is okay. I think way too many times, self esteem, ego,
you name, it is all wrapped up in batting average
or eer and I've heard it, I've seen it. You know,
I've seen a young lady give up a home run
and a travel ball Toronto and the dad literally punches
(21:22):
a tree that's next to him.
Speaker 3 (21:24):
That's just not good.
Speaker 1 (21:25):
Or the young lady goes oh for four and on
the ride back to the hotel, not a word is
said in a car, So all she's thinking to herself
is my dad only loves me.
Speaker 3 (21:35):
If I go four for four or gets a hit.
Speaker 1 (21:38):
That's just not a good, good path to go down
as a parent. You know, one of the books that
I recommend to any gentleman that has daughters. And our
equipment manager just told me yesterday that he's having a daughter.
I said, okay, dude, I got a book for you.
And it's called Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters, as by a
doctor Meg Meeker, and it's m E E K E R.
(22:03):
And I've read it probably ten times, and it seems
like and I don't know how many girls you have
or what's the ratio of the kids, but.
Speaker 2 (22:09):
I got five boys, one girl, a lot of testosterone
in my house.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
Usually my baseball buddies, that's the opposite. They have three girls,
four girls, five girls, one boy or no boys. So
that's why I always recommend this book. But if the
parent is okay with the kid being a role player,
the kid will be okay with it.
Speaker 3 (22:29):
It's very, very.
Speaker 1 (22:30):
Difficult to get a kid to buy in to be
a member of the team, to be a part of
something bigger than what she is if the parent is
not okay with it, and that is just unfortunately, because
usually the kids are okay. The kids are fine, we
don't have to worry about the young lady. It's it's
unfortunately some parents that the ego gets in the way
(22:51):
and kind of ruins a good situation for the young lady.
Speaker 2 (22:54):
The pushback on that would be coach, you know, my
kids on a great team, and they need exposure because
they're not going to let the coach. Murphy's not gonna
see my daughter if they're not getting the same amount
of playtime. And I'm also paying big bucks, you know
for this, and it's just not fair and YadA, YadA, YadA,
YadA YadA, because let's face it, the exposure piece is
what I mean. I'm sorry, it seems like that is
(23:15):
exactly what drives a lot of this. The whole entire travel,
youth sports tourism industry that's you know, growing by leaps
and bounds, and it's a thirty billion dollar roughly industry.
It's projected by twenty twenty nine to be upwards of
an eighty billion dollar industry. So it's like, you're spending
all this money I want to return on my investment.
(23:36):
How do you coach to the life lessons when it's like,
because not for nothing, A lot of these parents are
being pitched the idea that hey play for me and
I got an in with coach Murphy or I'm just
using it as an example, but that happens all the time.
So a lot of times parents are are being manipulated
in some ways. You know, not in all cases, but
how do you navigate that?
Speaker 1 (23:55):
You know? And when we have camps and clinics, I
always say, if you want to play.
Speaker 3 (23:58):
At the next level, there's this for everybody.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
And you know an AIA schools win national championships, there's
JUCO national championships. Every level has a national championship, so
there's places for everybody. But you have to be honest
with yourself in terms of where is the spot where
I need to be?
Speaker 3 (24:19):
Okay, we have a.
Speaker 1 (24:21):
Saying in our program, can you handle thirty seconds of
embarrassment for a lifetime of learning? Because what I'm about
to tell you, Nick, you might be a little embarrassed
about it, but it's probably going to help you for
a lifetime, So I'll say that probably the first week
of school I'll use that saying, and then maybe in
the fall there's a time where I need to say,
you're a little short on this whatever the whatever the
(24:43):
situation might be. And then I'll say, do you remember
what I said about thirty seconds of embarrassment because it
could happen right now, But do you want a lifetime
of learning? And you know what the answer always is, yes, sir,
let me hear it. So you know, and we always
say you have to be truly honest to your teammates
in order to be a really good friend. You know,
(25:04):
you cannot beat around the bush. You have to be
able to be one hundred percent honest with your teammates
to help them out. That's that's what they want to hear.
They want to hear the honest truth. And I think
it was was it Joe Madden that had the quote
where it said, you know, if I lie to my players,
they're going to hate me for life. If I tell
them the truth, they might dislike me for two weeks. Sure,
(25:25):
you know, just got to tell them the truth all
the time, all right.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
I want to ask you this as a legend in coaching,
but obviously in the sport of softball. Set the record
straight for softball parents, like, does it matter if a
kid is a multi sport athlete or does it matter
if the kid's been playing softball year round since they're eight?
Do you have a preference? Do you think there is
(25:49):
any correlation to being a multi sport athlete or a
kid that specialized and plays a softball year around that
they're better or worse or is it all an individual
case by case? Like where do you stand and is
there a right or wrong?
Speaker 1 (26:02):
I absolutely love multi sport kids. Boy girl, I feel
like once you're done with your softball, baseball, basketball, whatever
it is that you play that you're like primary. I
think it gives your entire body, your mental outlook, everything,
a chance to be able to just take a deep breath.
Speaker 3 (26:21):
You know.
Speaker 1 (26:21):
Let's say you play baseball in the summer in the
fall and then you want to play basketball, Go for it.
Speaker 3 (26:28):
Do it.
Speaker 1 (26:29):
It's different muscles, and you know, one of the coolest
things about it is you might not start in basketball.
You're probably the top dog in baseball or softball, but
when it comes to basketball, you love it. But you're
like the six seventh to eight person. You know how
many life lessons you're going to learn there. But you know,
one of the questions we always ask every recruit is
(26:50):
have you always been in the starting lineup? And if not,
how did you handle that?
Speaker 3 (26:55):
What happened?
Speaker 1 (26:56):
You know?
Speaker 3 (26:57):
And almost every single time, obviously they start it in softball, but.
Speaker 1 (27:01):
Then the young lady will say, well, you know, I
did play basketball, and shoot, I really got on the court.
And then I said, well, how did you handle that?
She said, I loved it, I loved the team. We
were really good. So you know, you try to ask
all these leading questions because what I'm getting at is,
if you come here and you don't play, what is
it going to be like? Because best case scenario, Nick,
(27:24):
you're going to start every gamut catcher. Yeah, case scenario,
you're not going to play. How do you handle it?
And I don't think a lot of people think about it.
Speaker 2 (27:33):
When you you mentioned the recruiting piece of it, like
how much of an impact for you are the parents like?
Did an impact? Negatively? If dad is punching the tree,
are you like, dude, I don't want that guy? That's
that that could be a problem.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
Yes, Unfortunately, that's not something that we would recruit. That's
not somebody we would recruit for sure. I like to
see they go over four and they strike out three times.
I'm usually trying to go as close to the dugout
as we possibly can to see how she's handling that.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
Does she go to the end of the dugout out
and throw her stuff or does she put her stuff, you.
Speaker 1 (28:10):
Know, in the helmet rack, put her bat down, take
her batting gloves off, and then get in the front
of the dug out and start cheering for the next kid.
Speaker 3 (28:16):
You know.
Speaker 1 (28:16):
I think you tell a lot by watching a kid
when they fail versus you know, the starters shoot, they
love and everything. Right, that's easy to be a starter.
The hardest thing is to not be a starter and
still pull for the team, you know, and can you
do that?
Speaker 2 (28:30):
So?
Speaker 1 (28:30):
And you know, the role player to me is the
reason why we win championships and why we're successful because
they have good vibe about them and they cheer for
the person in front of them. Now, they don't give up,
and they don't settle. Like you said at the very
beginning of this, I don't want anybody settling because then
it's kind of a waste of a spot on the roster.
Speaker 3 (28:47):
I want you to push the starter.
Speaker 1 (28:50):
Of the time and make her better because if you
both get better, the team is going to get better.
Speaker 3 (28:55):
Coach.
Speaker 2 (28:55):
As we wrap up here, you got the mic right,
You're a set in the stage, You're on the podium.
You're speaking to a room full of five hundred at
student athletes and their parents in there. You know, there
anywhere from eighth grade to a junior in high school.
These are all kids that want to come play at Alabama.
They want to play softball for you, or they just
want to get to the next level. What do they
have to do to get on your radar? What are
(29:17):
the things that you're looking for to be a part
of your program.
Speaker 3 (29:21):
Well, I think number one is.
Speaker 1 (29:24):
And it's probably the most boring thing in the world,
but be good at the fundamentals of anything in whatever
sports you're playing. So when a coach sees you, they
secret things and everything you know, and softball and baseball
season for me, throw run hit field, you know, like,
oh my gosh. And you should be able to walk
past a field and say, shure, that's an athlete. Wow,
(29:45):
look at her. I'll give you a little background on
that too. Is one of the questions we ask everybody
is if you come to Alabama, what type of intangible
would you bring to the program? And then I always say,
do you know what an intangible is? And sometimes they don't,
sometimes they do. Tangible is something you can't see, touch
or feel, and it's something inside you. A tangible thing
is when I walk across the field and I look
(30:07):
over my shoulder, I see, wow, she can throw, she
can hit, she can feel as an athlete, she can run.
But that's easy. Anybody can see that. You know, my
mom could walk across the field and say, wow, she's
a good athlete. But what I want to know is
what's inside you, which is the bigger picture. What would
you bring to the program if you came to us
that I don't know yet, Like what's inside your heart?
Speaker 3 (30:29):
What type of kid are you? What type of person
are you?
Speaker 1 (30:31):
What type of leadership trade could you bring that I
don't know about you? And when I asked that question,
the parents are just they know everything about the young
lady and they want to talk for her, and sometimes
they even like sit on their hands.
Speaker 3 (30:44):
Because they're about to talk.
Speaker 1 (30:45):
And I realize that the young lady needs to answer
the question. And some of the answers and Nick had
just been would just blow you out of the water.
It's just unbelievable. And those are the kids I want
in the program. But see the bigger picture. Work hard
on the fundamental obviously, kind to have the grades, you know,
to get any school, be a well rounded kid, because
there's way too many injuries nowadays, you know, after done
(31:08):
in high school, in summer ball, it's just way, way
too many.
Speaker 3 (31:10):
It's overused.
Speaker 1 (31:12):
You know, the best orthopedic in the world was doctor
Andrews and Birmingham and yeah, he had come over to
Alabama one time. They talk to all the string coaches
out like trainers and coaches because there was this rash
of shoulder injuries. And I'll never forget if he said,
you know, every athlete needs to take eight weeks off
of their activity in a year. Eight weeks, so put
(31:33):
down the football, put down the baseball, put down the bat,
whatever it is.
Speaker 3 (31:36):
And he didn't. He didn't mean he had to.
Speaker 1 (31:38):
Do it consecutively, like two months off, but just sit
it down and stay in shape.
Speaker 3 (31:43):
Whatever.
Speaker 1 (31:43):
And when I say that at coaches clinics, almost every
single time I get a coach who's usually a dad
that comes up and says, did you say eight.
Speaker 3 (31:51):
Days or eight weeks? And I spent eight weeks.
Speaker 1 (31:56):
Just take some time off, And it just it drives
me nuts when I see the tweets that say hashtag
no days off. Yes, there needs to be days off,
and a lot of them.
Speaker 2 (32:05):
I freaking love it. Doctor Andrews, that's the goat in
this space, and I've read his research and seen his works.
It's mine about Coach. I can't thank you enough for
coming on and sharing. You sound a lot. You and
coach I have Coach Tim Corbin on episode one, and
you guys have a lot in common. He talks a
lot about the classroom and you know, with his coaching,
philosophy and teaching, you remind me a lot of Coach Corps.
(32:29):
So guys are both stud So I can't thank you
enough for coming on to Sharon. This has been freaking awesome.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
I appreciate that, and that's a great comparison. I respect
the heck out of Coach Corbyn.
Speaker 2 (32:38):
Well, I wish you the best of luck, and you know,
I'm sure you're gonna have another hell of a year.
But I can't thank you enough.
Speaker 3 (32:43):
Coach, Thank you very much.
Speaker 2 (32:45):
That's Patrick Murphy, head softball coach at the University of Alabama.
Thanks for listening to the Reform Sports Podcast. If you've
enjoyed this episode, we would appreciate it if you took
a moment to rate and review our podcast. As we
work to grow our community of supporters and advocates for
more reform sports content, please subscribe to our newsletter and
blog at Reformsports Project dot com. You can also follow
(33:06):
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