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February 7, 2023 47 mins

PART FOUR - "Balanchine was so fond of perfume that leaves the scent of that dancer behind, and it still permeates."

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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Ballet in Balanchine's company was all about the female, the
idealized female, and putting her on a pedestal. And one
of the aspects of being a Balanchine dancer was to
have your own perfume that was nobody else's perfume. Balanchine

(00:26):
was so fond of perfume that leaves the scent of
that dancer behind. So it's as if the dancers have
a physiological energetic scent or pulse or resonance or feeld

(00:46):
that is absolutely indelible, and nobody else has it. It's
their own fingerprint. So we each had to have our own,
and we doused ourselves, and we're speaking about bathing and perfume.

(01:09):
We were supposed to leave our scent behind so that
he would know who was there before him.

Speaker 2 (01:15):
Why.

Speaker 1 (01:16):
It was just part of the culture, the same as
people dressing up for class. They would just make up
to the hill to the just so chaponskirt perfect, clean
shoes and hair done, and their own smells all looking good,
smelling good, all the volition in place, all the readiness

(01:38):
of being chosen, selected.

Speaker 3 (01:54):
For My Heart podcasts and Rococoa Punch. This is the
turning room of Mirrors America Lance, Part four, The Muses.

(02:19):
The dancers in Balancine's company wanted to present themselves well.
They wanted to please Balanchine, catch his eye. They knew
he was watching all the time in that studio without
windows and from the heavy curtains of the theater's wings.
By this point, Stephanie Land was an insider. She'd been
in the company for a while and had navigated the

(02:40):
culture and ethics of Valancine's world.

Speaker 1 (02:43):
We've rarely got any guests from outside, but Balanchine actually
really did favor a few people who came in, and
one was Pilentesmar from Paris Opera.

Speaker 3 (02:54):
Galentesmar was a star ballerina. She danced all over the world,
and even though she wasn't trained by balanging, she came
to guest dance with the company.

Speaker 1 (03:03):
Years later, I went to visit Guilln in Paris and
her apartment and we had a conversation about her experience.
And here's this person who was an eight twelve at
Paris Opera. She's a very, very gracious woman, and we
sat in her most wonderful apartment. She said, you know,
the first time I went in, I've just never seen

(03:24):
anything like it. It was like a harim, like a haram, Yes,
and we were so accustomed to it. But everybody in
that room was just waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting to be
the one the concubines or.

Speaker 4 (03:42):
Aum, waiting to be the one for Balancine. Essentially, Yes,
in his early years, certainly he did either Mary or
was with six of his ballerinas. And I say his ballerinas.
They really were part of his life, and each of
them quite different. In the stories around that, quite different,

(04:05):
And there are many, many stories to tell. This was
a time when there really were no clear boundaries, and
the desire to please and the confusion around that with
young women definitely was interwoven into that.

Speaker 3 (04:22):
I wanted to ask you about Apollo. Could we talk
about Apollo a little bit?

Speaker 1 (04:28):
We can.

Speaker 5 (04:30):
I watched a video of you dancing it recently, and
maybe could you describe that ballet?

Speaker 1 (04:41):
Oh dear, that takes a few hours. I can't even
begin to speak to Apollo with anything that would give
it its due. Honestly, it is so rich and so
ahead of its time. He was beginning to show us

(05:03):
how time and space and bodies and mind and music
could be sculpted and merged.

Speaker 3 (05:20):
Apollo is Balancing's first major collaboration with the composer Igor Stravinsky.
It was the start of what would be dozens of
projects they partner on, and it launched Balancing into international
fame when he was just twenty four. The ballet follows
young Apollo, the Greek god of music, as he is
visited and instructed by three muses, the Muse of Poetry,

(05:44):
the Muse of mime, and the Muse of dance and song.
At first, Apollo doesn't seem to know what he's doing.

Speaker 1 (05:55):
He's like a shaky cult or a young deer that
isn't quite on its legs yet. And then you see
him find his ground.

Speaker 3 (06:07):
You watch him become an artist and a god. During
the ballet, each muse dances for Apollo. They teach him,
they inspire him. At times, it's hard to tell who's
in power. They're all learning from each other. When Stephanie

(06:30):
danced it, she played the Muse of poetry Calliope. She's
the first of the muses to dance for Apollo, and
as she dances for him, her body suddenly caves in
on itself, as if an emotional or physical pain. Each
time you hear the cellos make a sudden, low sound.
Then she reaches out while holding one hand to her heart,

(06:52):
as if she's finally expressing what's within. Her mouth opens
as if to speak.

Speaker 1 (06:57):
This taking from the gut, from the core, from the soul,
through the throat, through the mouth, and out into the world.
It is again, I think, in that way that is
so Hallmark Balanchine about the importance of women in a
man's life. Only now, of course, the women are muses

(07:20):
and goddess creatures on Mountain Olympus, and that they are
going to teach this young god all that he needs
to learn. They are the mentors, the guides, the muses.

Speaker 3 (07:38):
Beyond the basic story, the ballet itself is beautiful. The
movements feel classical yet totally modern. At times, Apollo holds
all three of the muses hands and leads them or
moves them around in a chain, tangling them with each
other in this abstractly shaped knot. It's interesting to watch
how the power shifts throughout who is leading who was learning.

(08:01):
Apollo controls and manipulates the muses. Other times it seems
he struggles to contain them, struggles to keep up Ultimately,
Apollo takes his place as a god. Armed with the
knowledge of the muses. He's now powerful over them.

Speaker 1 (08:20):
It is his deep bow to the idealized female and
their role in shaping the world, shaping that world which
is otherworldly.

Speaker 3 (08:36):
An ode to his muses. Over the years, Balanchine would
have many.

Speaker 2 (08:46):
When he became very interested in someone. They might have
been sixteen or seventeen. They had certain exquisite gifts like
maybe an exquisite Arabesque or jumping, or maybe turning, or
the way the arm the upper body work together.

Speaker 3 (09:02):
When Garifola is a dance historian who lives in New York.
She saw many Balanchine ballets during the dance boom in
the seventies. When Balancine was inspired by a dancer, he'd
choreograph dances on her, as they call it, and not
just teach her the steps, but really dance through it
with her in a way that felt special, and in
many cases he'd fall in love with her.

Speaker 2 (09:25):
I think for balancein working with someone and dancing with
someone was perhaps the only way in which he could
create a really close relationship.

Speaker 3 (09:38):
Balanging was totally absorbed in the art form, and he
asked the same of his dancers to fully surrender to
the art form and to his vision. Holly Howard was
one dancer Balanchine was drawn to early on, in the
nineteen thirties, she danced the role of a muse in

(10:00):
the first performance of Apollo in the United States.

Speaker 6 (10:03):
Holly Howard a wonderful American dancer. She was arguably Balanching's
first American muse, like the first American dancer that he
became really obsessed with and that really drove his art.

Speaker 3 (10:23):
Jim Stikeen researched Balancing's early career. He scoured the diaries
of Lincoln Kirstein, the man who invited Balanging to the
US to start his work. The diaries gave Jim a
window into the dynamics of those early years in the
United States.

Speaker 6 (10:40):
Balancing took a romantic interest in Holly Howard, and they
were kind of a couple. You know, everyone's super young.

Speaker 3 (10:47):
And at one point they were touring the East Coast
on the bus, Balanging sat with Holly his current news.

Speaker 6 (10:55):
When they were in Princeton, Holly Howard, after their show,
decided to go out with some of the Princeton men
and the next day when they're getting back on the
tour bus, Balancing sitting next to a different dancer and says, oh, well,
you know, you decided to go out to the Princeton
Boys so you can sit next to someone else. So

(11:16):
there's that classic manipulation power move. We don't really need
to know too many of the details to know that
there's some games being played and some power dynamics at play.

Speaker 3 (11:31):
Because even though they had a relationship, Balanging was still
Holly's boss.

Speaker 6 (11:37):
The other chilling tidbit in Christine's Diaries makes a reference
to one day that Holly Howard had had her fourth
abortion by Balancing. It's hard to know what that really means,
but you can read between the lines and think about

(11:57):
what was happening.

Speaker 3 (11:59):
When you say read between the lines, like, how do
you read between the lines there?

Speaker 6 (12:03):
So clearly they're sleeping together.

Speaker 3 (12:06):
When you say use the phrase fourth abortion by balancing,
is that imply essentially the fourth termination of a pregnancy that,
like Balancing was the father.

Speaker 6 (12:16):
That's my understanding. You know, we know for a fact
that Balancing didn't want his dancers, especially the start answers,
to get pregnant and have children, So it's you know,
Do we have any idea how consensual their relationship was.
Do we have any idea how consensual those decisions to

(12:36):
terminate were. Do we have any idea what Holly Howard
went through to go through those procedures while still dancing
at a very high level. You know, that's where you
realize that the cult makes him into this entirely benevolent figure.

Speaker 3 (12:55):
When Jim says cult, he thinks there's almost a cult
around Balannging. He also calls it the Church of Balancing,
fervent admirers who don't want anything bad said about him, writers, critics,
and dancers who'd rather sweep unflattering stories under the rug
or minimize those stories effects.

Speaker 6 (13:14):
You know, we well probably never know the full story,
but this is kind of the height of her career.
She kind of fades away after this.

Speaker 3 (13:24):
These relationships often faded away eventually. Lynn says he'd always
move on.

Speaker 2 (13:33):
Well, this is a little bit like the Six Wives
of Henry the Eighth, Not quite, but a little bit
like that.

Speaker 3 (13:41):
Balancing married or partnered with a number of these dancers,
five to be exact, Tamara, Alexandra, Vera, Maria, and Tannakhill.
But even beyond those marriages, he developed other romantic relationships,
which always seemed to be intertwined with his work in
some way. Some of these relationships ended because the ballerina's
career has led them elsewhere, to cabarets or to Hollywood,

(14:04):
But more commonly the relationships ended for a different reason.

Speaker 2 (14:08):
I think there's a sense in his work that the ballerina,
the woman who for a certain moment is ideal, is
never fully attainable, or perhaps once she appears to be attained,
then perhaps he loses interest and moves on to something else,
to someone else, she's no longer ideal.

Speaker 3 (14:51):
Through Balancine's twenties, his thirties, and his forties, his pattern
of having relationships with his dancers persisted. Sometimes he was
decade older than his romantic counterpart. His company grew, he
had more and more talented dancers coming into their own
and inspiring his choreography.

Speaker 2 (15:10):
In nineteen fifty four, he was fifty years old, and
he sees this talent around and he's making ballets for
them all. And then there's Allegra Kent. It's very young,
Allegri Kent.

Speaker 7 (15:32):
This is siren City. The traffic doesn't stop for sirens.
And it's a free for all.

Speaker 1 (15:40):
Wow.

Speaker 7 (15:45):
My name is Allegra Kent. I was born in August eleventh,
nineteen thirty seven, on the same day that Edith Wharton.

Speaker 3 (15:55):
Died turning producer Alan Lance Lesser, and I met Allegorc
Kent in her studio apartment in New York, walking in
felt special. Allegra Kent was one of those muses who
stood out. She was somebody balannging bent the norms for
I've known who she was since I was a kid.
I read one of the books she wrote cover to

(16:15):
cover many times in middle school. She was my idea
of the perfect ballerina. It's hard to think of a
more iconic dancer than Alegra Kent.

Speaker 7 (16:24):
Yes, your wall is just covered in dwellers. Most of
it is career pictures, but I need more children and grandchildren.

Speaker 3 (16:33):
At eighty five, Alecra's fingers are thin and wrinkled. She
gestures to the photos on the wall and slow circular motions.
They're mostly of Allegra, gorgeous and moody, black and white
images of her in the most beautiful poses mid dance.

Speaker 7 (16:49):
So over here seven Deadly Sinned.

Speaker 3 (16:52):
There are shots of her backstage. One of her balancing
on point that had been in Vogue magazine.

Speaker 7 (16:57):
This is Russia ninety two. My name is over there.

Speaker 3 (17:03):
A poster in Russian with her name on it, and
then Balanchine and Allegra both squatting mid motion. They're dancing together,
side by side. Next to it is a photo of
the two of them on stage in front of the curtain.
She holds a bouquet of flowers.

Speaker 7 (17:19):
A bow with Balanchine Saraena Japan.

Speaker 3 (17:25):
Scattered among all this are these blue and black images.
They look like ink blots, rorshock tests. When we get
closer we realize they're dark limbs in bright blue water.
They're photos of Allegra doing exercises in a pool. She
used to put flotation devices on her arms and legs
and move in the.

Speaker 7 (17:44):
Water, pushing air down in the water was easy to
go up, but hard to go down. It's like contrary
too gravity. I have a certain contrariness in my nature.

Speaker 3 (18:10):
In these pictures in the pool, her body reflected itself,
cut in half, the pool became a mirror. You can't
see her torso or her face, just legs and arms
reflected back. Surreal symmetry. Part of her is always hidden.
What do you think was your favorite ballet to dance?

Speaker 7 (18:32):
That is very hard to say.

Speaker 3 (18:36):
It's like asking what your favorite child is or something.

Speaker 7 (18:40):
Or your favorite flower, because then I think, oh, all
the flowers should start with A. Those are all my favorite,
all the ones that start with B yes, all the
ones that start with P yes, all the ones it
start with W. So I could throw out an answer,
but I think I won't.

Speaker 3 (19:03):
Throughout our interview, Allegra's thoughts felt watery and mysterious and
hard to pin down. She often left our questions unanswered.
Allegra was born in Santa Monica, California, to two Jewish parents.
They divorced while she was still young.

Speaker 7 (19:19):
In California, for a while, everyone changed their religion once
a week, but my mother decided that we should be
Christian scientists. According to Christian science, there's no pain. It's
very complicated.

Speaker 3 (19:39):
The Christian scientists around her believed the physical body had
no substance, that pain and pleasure weren't real, and Elkra
took that seriously. When she danced, she told herself the
pain wasn't real and kept dancing. In this religious household,
Alekra learned to obey authority, and she learned to keep

(20:00):
unpleasant feelings hidden with ballet. Even as a kid, she
realized she had found a way to express herself without
revealing her thoughts. Dance was how she fought with her mother.
Dance could bypass words. That's something Balanging would understand. He
was known for speaking through movement. For the rest of

(20:21):
Alkra's life, she'd feel that displaying emotions made her vulnerable,
so she didn't. She held them secret, and that's what
made dance special. When a Lakra was fourteen, she and
her mother moved to New York so a Leger could
pursue dance. She auditioned for a scholarship at the School

(20:43):
of American Ballet. Her mother did the talking. They brought
a letter of introduction from her previous ballet teacher, who wrote,
Alegras dancing was demonic. Balanging observed part of a ballet
class to a valuate her. She says, even at the time,
she knew this was a metaphysically all or nothing moment.

(21:06):
She had the feeling if Balanching rejected her, she'd have
some kind of breakdown. As a Legger danced, she mirrored
his face with her own almost involuntarily. His face gave
nothing away, and neither did hers. She wouldn't let him
see how important she knew the passing moments were, or

(21:26):
how eager she was to get a scholarship. After four
short minutes, he left. It was all he needed. She
got the scholarship. A year later, she was invited to
be an apprentice in the company. Soon she took her
first ballet classes from balancing himself from mister b.

Speaker 7 (21:50):
She liked the way I danced, He liked the way
I moved.

Speaker 3 (21:55):
One day during class, Balanchine said to her, you can
do anything.

Speaker 7 (22:00):
But yeah, I was a little different the way I
approached things, in the way the way I heard the music.
So yes, but the music came first.

Speaker 3 (22:13):
Of course, Alegra understood Balancine's philosophy. The music came first,
and the when he talked about it felt almost magical.

Speaker 7 (22:30):
One evening performance, we were doing a Mozart ballet in Salzburg,
and he said, last night I spoke to Mozart and
he he started talking about this experience. I wish I'd
written it down because as he was speaking, one moment

(22:53):
I was crying and the next moment I was laughing
because it was so glorious, was so moving, so and
actually I think he did.

Speaker 3 (23:05):
You think he spooked amongstart.

Speaker 7 (23:07):
I think he communicated with the greatness of the past.

Speaker 3 (23:14):
Could you tell us about Balanchine's relationships with his dancers.
He fell in love with a number of his dancers,
He married some of his dancers, and I think that as.

Speaker 7 (23:23):
Far as that was in the early years, and then
his life became much more complicated, and it's so complicated
I can't talk about.

Speaker 3 (23:34):
But she would write about some of it in her autobiography,
and things certainly would become complicated. Alegra writes she noticed
a pattern in Balanchine's love affairs. There was a time
limit around seven years. Balanchine got older, the women stayed
the same age, usually between fifteen and twenty three, Alegro wrote.

(23:57):
As an apprentice, Aligo found herself in classes with dancers
she admired, including some of Balanchine's former and future wives,
who danced side by side. When Alekra was an apprentice,
Tanakille Leclair was on the rise. Tanny she was called.
She was eight years older than Allegra and looked like
modern art. Allegra says, one day Tanny came in with

(24:20):
a bandage on her nose. Apparently she'd kicked so high
to the front during a grand Vatma exercise that she
need herself in the face. Allegra was impressed. Allegra's mother
and the other mothers talked about Balancine constantly, and that
included his romantic pursuits. They became experts. They said Tanny
had caught Balanchine's eye when she was eleven years old. Later,

(24:42):
when they went on tour, Tanny and her mother stayed
in a suite with mister b. In nineteen fifty two,
Balancine married Tanakil. She was twenty three and he was
forty eight. He'd found his new muse. Allegra's mother didn't
like this pattern of women. Alegra writes in her autobiography,

(25:02):
in my mother's mind, there was only one type of
pain that could be truly serious, and that would occur
if Balanchine got me. Nothing was as terrible as his
making me another lolita in his ballerina gallery. In nineteen
fifty three, Allegra was still an apprentice, and then she

(25:25):
got the news.

Speaker 7 (25:26):
I was invited into the company. I was fifty.

Speaker 3 (25:31):
She said, yes, What would you say? Were some of
the pivotal moments or turning points as a dancer.

Speaker 7 (25:40):
Definitely the Unanswered Question that launched you as a star.
That was the first piece Balanine did for me, the
first ballet.

Speaker 3 (25:52):
I was seventeen, Balanchine was fifty. Aleikra had been in
the company two years, dancing in the core. This rehearsal
was different, just her and four men. Balanchin told Alegra
to take her point shoes off. She would do this
piece barefoot, but her feet would never touch the floor.

(26:13):
Balancin had her climb on top of the ballet bar.
He placed the four men in front of her, and
then he said, now, Allegra, step on the men's shoulders.
The men gripped her ankles and she stepped up. Eventually,
on stage, the men would wear all black. Their costumes

(26:35):
dissolved them into the dark backdrop.

Speaker 7 (26:39):
I'm wearing all white leotar. Nothing yell tear down.

Speaker 3 (26:43):
The piece was called The Unanswered Question. It began with
one man, bear skinned, the only one not in black,
backing onto the stage looking up.

Speaker 7 (26:55):
A man comes out, searching, seeking to feel the truth
of what this image is, and a woman is being
held totally upright and progressing slowly.

Speaker 3 (27:14):
While the visible man reaches for her. The men in
black carry her forward. She's loading above them all standing,
then sitting in mid air, then dipping backwards in a summersault,
righted through the men's legs, and moved back up in
a slow motion dive. It's like watching someone swim in
a watery black void. And the bear skinned man the seeker,

(27:38):
reaches for her.

Speaker 7 (27:40):
Is she an image? Is she on the unobtainable? She
is everything? But he can't. She's out of reach, and
at one point she sort of curls into his arm,
but immediately the men take her away and she's threaded

(28:02):
in and at one point she's held on high and
I slowly tilted backwards and fell.

Speaker 3 (28:12):
Fell straight back from standing on their shoulders. You could
hear the terror from the audience.

Speaker 7 (28:17):
It sounded like a gas. Of course, the man caught
me as I did every time, but I realized it
bouncing love to create fear, traumatic fear in the audience,
and that was definitely one of those moments. And then

(28:43):
the ballet progresses. I'm threaded through their legs, I'm hauled
around like rope around their waist. I'm held on high
and I do Arabique, and then not at leave, I'm
taking way and the man the seeker is still following me,

(29:07):
but this time he's in back. He's not in front.
She has moved past him, and I'm unobtainable.

Speaker 3 (29:22):
It was the beginning of her life as a balancing muse.
During rehearsals of The Unanswered Question, Allegra felt balanging was
in love with her. The question hung there. What did
mister B ultimately want from her? She thinks at that
point neither of them knew what was your relationship with Balanchine?

Speaker 7 (29:44):
Like he choreographed, he chose me. I danced and very warm,
not personal, very warm. He'd asks how I was, and
things like that out.

Speaker 3 (30:01):
Aligra and mister B's connection felt close and unspoken. It
would never turn romantic. In The Unanswered Question, Aligra says
she was a sensual, spiritual object sought by a man
who could never possess her, the object of a quest,
but she eludes the man. The mystery is never solved,

(30:22):
the question never answered. That's the dynamic of all the

(30:47):
roles balance shed would make for her. She writes, a
suppressed in her life and unanswered questions everyone knew Balanchine

(31:28):
thought his dancers shouldn't have children. He'd say to them,
anyone can be a mother, but how many could be
a ballerina? How many could dance Balanchine's choreography. But Alikra
got married, she had a baby, despite Balancine's wishes.

Speaker 7 (31:43):
I did what I wanted to do. That was part
of my nature.

Speaker 3 (31:51):
Alkra speaks highly of Balanchine. She doesn't seem to want
to get into the nitty gritty of relationships or company dynamics,
but in her autobiography, Allegra writes that leaving the company
for any reason was a dangerous thing. Balanging might not
want you back. Disloyalty hurt him. He expected allegiance. Allegra

(32:11):
writes that although he didn't overtly encourage awe or worship,
in a subtle way, he used the idolatry of the
dancers to keep the company together.

Speaker 7 (32:22):
I think the first baby Balancing thought was an accident,
but the second one he thought. Wait a minute.

Speaker 3 (32:30):
When Allegra came back from childbirth the second time, she
writes that he told her in a serious tone, Now, Allegra,
no more babies. Enough is enough. Babies are for Puerto Ricans.
I don't know if this was a racist joke or
a racist attempt to rain Allegra in. Either way, she thought,

(32:51):
this man directs the company, not my life.

Speaker 7 (32:54):
But he welcomed me back into the company. He always
will be back.

Speaker 3 (33:01):
So what she didn't realize yet was that she'd never
be back, not really. While she was having a baby,
Balancing had turned to someone new, someone young, someone who
had become his most famous muse of all time, a
fifteen year old girl named Suzanne Farrell.

Speaker 6 (33:22):
Balancing and Suzanne Ferrell were joined at the hip. This couple,
this you know, you know, you could call it an
artistic power couple. You could call it, hey, you know,
muse artist. There's obsession in both directions.

Speaker 3 (33:38):
I think Suzanne is probably Balancinge's most iconic dancer and
his most complicated relationship. She declined to speak with us
for this podcast, but she did write a memoir about
this time. Early on, when she was at the School
of American Ballet, it was clear that Balanchine was drawn
to her. She had physical quality. He was looking for

(34:01):
a natural musicality and a willingness to try anything he asked.
Balancine choreographed the first ballet specifically for Suzanne when she
was eighteen. It was a potted duh between a young
girl and an older man. She realized it was about
the two of them. Later, she would write, it did

(34:27):
not occur to me that I was entering into an
emotional abyss so deep that perhaps I should decide if
I thought it might be worth it it was worth it,
But I never once stopped to consider that question. In retrospect,
I realized that the fact that I had no outside
points of reference meant that I made various important decisions

(34:47):
in a social vacuum. Balancie and Suzanne worked closely in
the studio, like creative conspirators, and that trickled outside the theater.
On tour in Europe, they spent every evening together at
museums or shops, or walking arm in arm. Soon Balanchine

(35:08):
became Suzanne's whole life. Knowing Balanchine's jealousy, Suzanne felt she
couldn't really have other friends, and she didn't mind. Even
though Balanchine was forty one years older than Suzanne. There
was this romantic undercurrent that was clear to everyone. When

(35:30):
she was twenty two and he was sixty three, A
newspaper even falsely reported that they were engaged, and Suzanne
felt that undercurrent herself. In her book, she writes, quote,
it was for him that I felt the first stirrings
of adult love, and he was, without doubt the most
important man in my life. But she knew Balanchine was

(35:50):
still married to Tanny, that he was living two separate lives,
one of which she didn't discuss with Suzanne. So when
an audience member began taking special note notice of her,
she began a new relationship. His name was Roger. He
was a couple of months older than her, and when
they got engaged, he gave her a pearl ring. Suzanne

(36:10):
knew not to wear the ring to the theater, but
one day Balanchine saw it on her finger. He exploded.
He ordered her to take it off. His anger frightened her.
She obeyed and ended her relationship with Roger. In the end,
she said it was not her decision, it was Balanchine's.

(36:38):
A week later, Balancing came to Suzanne's hotel room on tour.
He presented her with his own ring. She writes that
when she turned it down, he hurled it across the
room in fear. She dropped to her knees, clambered for
the ring under the bed, and put it on her finger.
She says, quote. It was never quite clear whether or

(36:58):
not the ring was intended to symbolize our present or
future union in marriage. But I think, at least to him,
it dignified an exclusive attachment. To me, it dignified love
and all its ghoshness, desperation and beauty. Dancers at the

(37:19):
company knew that Suzanne Ferrell was off limits romantically, that
she belonged to balancing, But eventually Suzanne did start to
date someone else again, a fellow dancer in the company,
Paul Mahea. They kept it secret, but they couldn't hide
it entirely. When Balanchine realized Suzanne and Paul were in
a relationship, he did something Suzanne did not expect this time.

(37:42):
He asked her to marry him. But Suzanne couldn't give
Balanchine what he wanted. She and Paul quietly married, and
that's when things unraveled. Balanchine avoided Suzanne and Paul started
losing roles. Finally, one day, Suzanne confronted balancing. She would

(38:02):
later call that day the most surreal day of her life.
She sent balancing a note stop the retaliation, or she
and Paul would leave the company, not that she thought
it would go that far, but balancing was still her boss.
That night, the Russian wardrobe manager entered the dressing room
and slipped Suzanne's two two off its hangar. She was crying, Suzanne,

(38:26):
You're not dancing tonight, she said. At age twenty three,
Suzanne realized her world was ending. She was no longer
a member of the New York City Ballet.

Speaker 6 (38:42):
And you know, you can imagine someone that young, who
had built their entire life and identity around one artist,
run a company, and Balanching at that time was such
a powerful figure. No other company in America would be
able to hire Suzanne Ferrell to dance, even though she
was one of the preeminent dancers of her generation, for

(39:05):
fear of incurring the ire of balancing.

Speaker 1 (39:16):
Balanchine was so fond of perfumes that leaves the scent
of that dancer behind, and it still permeates.

Speaker 3 (39:25):
Teenage Sephanie Seland joined the company a couple of years
after Suzanne had been forced out. The muse was still
in the air, her presence lingered.

Speaker 1 (39:39):
My parents got me as my graduation, President Magrief.

Speaker 3 (39:43):
A bottle of perfume, and.

Speaker 1 (39:45):
I remember just bathing in the scent. And at the time,
Susanne Ferrell had gone away from the company, and I
got into the elevator, I believe with Valanchine and Carnvan.

Speaker 3 (40:01):
Karen was another famous answer at the company. When Stephanie
stepped into the elevator, she says she saw something change
on mister B's face.

Speaker 1 (40:10):
A little bit of a look of displeasure or surprise
or unease, And Karen just looked at me sideways and
kind of cringed, and I didn't know why. And afterwards
mister B got out and she let me know that
the perfume was definitely to be discarded. It had been

(40:32):
Suzanne's perfume.

Speaker 3 (40:37):
Years later, Suzanne Ferrell would eventually return to Balanchine and
his company finally forgiven. They continued to work together for
years until Balancine's death. Suzanne Ferrell's story is one of
ballet legend, now a piece of balancing history that lingers
in the air and not everyone sees eyed eye on it.
Historian Jim Steichen is someone who's been publicly critical of

(41:00):
how Balancing treated Susanne she's.

Speaker 6 (41:03):
Never denounced him for the way that he treated her,
but you know, it was really shocking the way that
she was treated, and it's hard not to think about
it in terms of like a you know, blacklisting of
like someone who spurs your romantic overtures, who chooses another
man over you, and then you are going to punish
that woman professionally and ensure that her livelihood is endangered

(41:26):
and that she can't have autonomy over her own career
and life. So it's it's a really tricky case. A
lot of people have criticized me for kind of parsing
it out and writing about it. I don't know how
you can call that anything but a misogynistic, abusive hower

(41:50):
in something that even if she won't denounce him, it's
like the actions kind of speak for themselves.

Speaker 3 (42:11):
This is what Suzanne Farrell wrote in her memoir. Quote
that Balancine spent his life building pedestals for his ballerinas
to stand on is no secret, and although some might
protest the position as one of inequality, no one who
has ever been there has ever complained it is the
most humbling and beautiful place I've ever been. Balancine was

(42:32):
a feminist, long before it was the fashion. He devoted
his life to celebrating female independence. End Quote Suzanne, Holly, Tannekiel, Elygra, Stephanie.
They all performed Balanchine's ballet Apollo. They all played the

(42:55):
roles of Apollo's muses on stage. Apollo is such a
beautiful ballet. I can't help but love it. But something
about it bothers me too. As much as the muses
have their moments, you know that Apollo is the center.
The muses are important, but they're important because of what
they do for him. Apollo is the god. He is

(43:18):
in control. Apollo or Balanching, keeps the muse on her
pedestal right where he can always see her. Balancing. Has
many famous quotations, but maybe the most famous is that

(43:39):
he loved to say ballet is woman. People often quote
ballet is woman as a sign of his reverence for
the female body and the role of women in his art.
It's a phrase you hear all the time, but what
does it really mean. How feminist is the phrase ballet

(43:59):
is woman? This is the rest of what Balanchine had
to say. Quote man is a better cook, a better painter,
a better musician. Composer. Everything is man sports everything. Man
is stronger, faster. Why because we have muscles and we're
made that way. And woman accepts this. It is her

(44:22):
business to accept. She knows what's beautiful. Men are great
poets because they have to write beautiful poetry for women.
Odes to a beautiful woman. Woman accepts the beautiful poetry.
You see, man is the servant, a good servant. In ballet, however,
woman is first. Everywhere else man is first, but in ballet,

(44:46):
it's the woman. All my life. I've dedicated my art
to her.

Speaker 8 (45:21):
Next time on The Turning Gone unchecked, bad things can happen,
and they did, and then people are scared. You know,
people are still afraid to talk.

Speaker 3 (45:45):
The Turning is a production of Rococo Punch and iHeart Podcasts.
It's written and produced by Alan Lance Lesser and Me.
Our story editor is Emily Foreman. Mixing and sound designed
by James Trout. Jessica Krisa as our assistant producer. Andrea
Assuage is our digital producer. Fact checking by Andrea Lopez Crusado.

(46:08):
Special thanks to a leg or Kent if you want
to check it out. Her autobiography is called Once a
Dancer also to Suzanne Farrell and Tony Bentley, who wrote
the memoir Holding Onto the Air, and Jim Steichen, whose
book is called Balanjin, and Kirstine's American Enterprise. Our executive

(46:29):
producers are John Paratti and Jessica Alpert at Rococo Punch
and Katrina Norvel and Nikki Etour at iHeart Podcasts. For
photos and more details on the series, follow us on
Instagram at Rococo Punch, and you can reach out via

(46:49):
email The Turning at rococo punch dot com. I'm Erica Lance.
Thanks for listening.
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