August 14, 2025 • 47 mins
Aaaaand we're back with part two of our two-episode tribute to Professor Anita Hill. In this episode we dive more into her continued legacy and the significance of Kimberlé Crenshaw in the intersectional fight against sexual violence
Leatra also shares Jimanekia Eborn's Grad Chapter Corner, catching up on how she's been over the past two years since they recorded her interview.
Resources & Mentions
Meet Anita Hill
Aamna Mohdin’s article from The Guardian- Kimberlé Crenshaw: The Woman Who Revolutionised Feminism – and Landed at the Heart of the Culture Wars
DeNeen L. Brown’s article from The Washington Post- The Scathing Ad 1,600 Black Women Bought to Oppose Clarence Thomas
Twitter post from author Tayari Jones, a Black woman who donated to the ad
The Shirley Chisholm Project’s article celebrating Anita Hill’s documentary release
Anita Hill's books, Speaking Truth to Power (1998), Reimagining Equality: Stories of Gender, Race, and Finding Home (2012), and Believing: Our Thirty-Year Journey to End Gender Violence (2022)
Jimanekia Eborn's nonprofit, Tending the Garden. Looking to join the survivor space? Check it out here
Catch Jimanekia hosting the following upcoming events: 1. CINTIMA's first annual Flicker Festival, a first-of-its-kind curated international festival celebrating intimate storytelling in film, learn more here and 2. Link to Tending the Garden's programming, created to help you "explore a safe, supportive space offering tools, workshops, and connections to help you thrive."
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Welcome to another episode of The Unwanted Sorority. I'm your host, Leetra.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
This is a space.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Created for and by Black women, fem's, and gender expansive
folks who've experienced sexual violence. Whether you've lifted, love someone
who has, or simply want to hold space.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
You're welcome here.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
We are kicking off part two of last week's conversation,
and so this week we're going to continue with our
flowers for the Founder segment for Miss Anita Hill, and
we're also going to be giving flowers to Kimberly Crenshaw
and highlighting her contributions to why Anita's story is so
significant for us in this moment. None of this work
is not in isolation, and kimberly support of Anita.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Is a true testament to that.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
And so we'll also catch up with Jiminika after two years,
where you'll get a chance to dive into how she's
been tending to her garden during that time, because life
has not stopped lifing in the meantime, so let's get
into it.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
Last week we gave.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
Flowers to our founder and sister, Anita Hill, and this
week I want to continue with Anita's story and highlight
a key player on her team, and that woman is
none other than Kimberly Crenshaw. So we've talked about Kimberly's
(01:25):
introduction of the term intersectionality on a previous episode here,
but she actually played a major role in Anita's legal
team at the time. In an interview with The Guardian,
Kimberly Crenshaw describes feeling dejected and exhausted from having to
navigate the social climate while being on Anita's team. One
moment she remembered vividly.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
It was actually the day.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Before Clarence Thomas's confirmation, and as she was leaving the
Capitol Building one evening, she saw a group of black people,
mostly women, gathered at the bottom of the steps in
a prayer circle, and she recalled letting out a sigh
of relief as she walked towards them. She was thinking, Oh,
thank God, a place we can go and embrace each
(02:08):
other because this is a struggle. And that's a direct
quote from her from the article. And dred immediately flooded
Kimberly as she got closer to the prayer circle because
she started noticing what they were wearing. They were wearing
t shirts that read quote support Clarence Thomas, and she
(02:30):
started to overhear some of the things they were talking about,
these declarations, calling Anita a Jezebel, and Kimberly said it
was like a horror film. In that article, she says, quote,
you think you're safe, but it turns out that the
people you're running to are actually infected with whatever you're
running from. As Omna Moden, author of the Guardian's article
(02:55):
on Kimberly Crenshaw, describes it quote with feminist supporting Hill
and anti racist activists defending Thomas, twin, calls for equality
were being put in opposition to each other, and so
Anita's case cemented the need to understand intersectionality, which is
the way that being both black and a woman meant
(03:17):
facing unique vulnerabilities, and in this case, it doubled the
doubts around Anita's testimony. Sexual harassment has largely been seen
as a white woman's issue, but Anita forced the world
to confront that reality that black women too are victimized
in this way and are often not believed. Watching those hearings,
(03:40):
black feminist scholars around the country were outraged at how
Anita was treated and how her voice was dismissed, so
much so that just one month after the hearings, sixteen
hundred black women lent their money and their names for
the purchase of a full page ad in The New
York Times with the headline that read, in bold and dead,
(04:00):
sinner in the middle of the page quote African American
women in defense of ourselves. The statement condemned the Senates
racist and sexist treatment of Professor Anita Hill, saying quote
malicious defamation of Professor Hill insulted all women of African
descent and sent a dangerous message to any woman who
(04:23):
might contemplate a sexual harassment complaint end quote.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
This collective action.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
Was led by scholars like Barbara Ransby, Deborah King, and
Elsa Barkley Brown, and it was a demand that black
women's voices be heard and believed. As Barbara Ransby put
it in a twenty eighteen article in the Washington Post,
quote we were all Anita Hill at that moment. Most
(04:50):
of us had experienced some form of harassment. We found
her story perfectly believable. End quote. That article in the
New York Times served as a declaration and a pledge
that they would continue to fight for black women's dignity
in response to oppressors, and they clarified that this included oppressors.
Quote no matter what color, period, no one will speak
(05:15):
for us but ourselves end quote. After a grueling day,
Anita's testimony finally ended. Clarence Thomas was ultimately confirmed to
the Supreme Court with a narrow Senate vote of fifty
two to forty eight. But similar to this lifetime appointment
of his, Anita would also take on a lifetime appointment
(05:36):
as a history maker, a movement founder who we can
give flowers to in spaces such as the Unwanted Sorority,
and an activist for women's rights. Her life would never
be the same. While she received thousands of letters of support,
she also continued to receive death threats and hate mail.
(05:57):
Even years later, Anita was further traumatized by institutional shunning
and marginalization at the University of Oklahoma, with conservative state
lawmakers calling for her to be fired. Thankfully, she had
already earned tenure at the institution by that time, so
her job was secure, but she recalled feeling uncomfortable, and
(06:18):
she even received comments from other colleagues who were noting
their discomfort at all the attention she was receiving and
despite these very real attacks on her safety, well being,
and integrity. Anita's testimony marked a turning point in how
the United States talked about sexual misconduct and workplace power dynamics.
Organizations like the National Women's Law Center, for example, describe
(06:42):
how the phones began ringing off the hook with women
who were finally ready to come forward with their own
stories of workplace sexual harassment after hearing Anita's experience. Anita's
impact reached Congress too, resulting in the passing of a
law in nineteen ninety one that strengthened the rights of
sexual harassment victims, who could now seek damages in court,
(07:03):
just like victims of racial discrimination could. Further, nineteen ninety
two became dubbed as quote the Year of the Woman,
when four new women sought seats in the United States
Senate and one This tripled the number of elected women
senators in one election cycle. It was as if women
across the country agreed to refuse to let another all
(07:25):
male Senate panel mistreat a woman again. Let me put
a pin in that for a moment. We're going to
come back to it in a sec Anita would go
on to leave Oklahoma for a fresh start in Massachusetts
and join Brandeis University in nineteen ninety eight as a
faculty member, where she continues to teach courses on gender, race,
(07:46):
social policy, and legal history. Her autobiography was released in
nineteen ninety eight, which is titled Speaking Truth to Power,
where she described that time period in her role in
Clarence Thomas's confirmation controversy in her own words. Her second book,
Reimagining Equality, Stories of Gender, Race, and Finding Home was
(08:09):
published in twenty eleven, and she takes readers on a
journey of understanding what it means to be at home
in this country. She channeled that experience into a lifelong
mission that ensures that what happened to her, both the
sexual harassment and the public disbelief, what happen to fewer
(08:31):
and fewer women after her.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
So let's pick up that previous pen that I put
in the story.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Fast forward to twenty eighteen, nearly thirty years after Anita's
testimony at the Senate hearing, the nation is focused on
yet another woman, doctor Christine Blasiford, who is preparing to
testify against another Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh, who she
says sexually assaulted her when she younger. Parallels between Anita
(09:02):
and Christine were so unmistakable, both women standing before largely
male senators to testify, both recalling painful truths about their experience,
and both navigating widespread division amongst Americans regarding whether they
believed these women or not.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
At this point, it was clear that.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Anita's legacy had helped to shift the foundation from which
most people were operating regarding their understanding of sexual harassment
and sexual violence in general, and the hashtagmy Too movement
had turned into a global campaign at the time, creating
another large social movement through which women and people were
finding their ways towards speaking their truth. And Anita's book
(09:45):
that was published in twenty twenty one, titled Believing Our
Thirty Year Journey to End Gender Violence, she describes how
her testimony in nineteen ninety one not only transformed her life,
but it sparked a national conversation about gender based on
which she said propelled over the decades so that actions
(10:05):
like the hashtechnique to movement and the testimony of Christine
showed that this conversation is far from over. In that book,
Anita both celebrates how much more awareness there is now,
noting how we have a lexicon for words like sexual
harassment and consent, and how survivors have formed networks of
support just like the unwonted sorority, and research in these
(10:27):
areas have expanded, But she also describes how deeply entrenched
the problem still is in our society. For example, she
argues that gender based violence is pervasive, describing it as
an epidemic that infects campus', workplaces, homes in all areas
of society, and she argues that it's intersectional in that
(10:49):
biases of race, class, and sexual orientation make it so
that women of color, LGBTQ plus individuals, and other marginalized
groups are still suffering them most and believe the least.
She also likens the struggle for gender equality to that
of running a relay race. She calls it a long
(11:10):
marathon of many generations, not a quick sprint. She says
that we owe it to future generations to keep passing
the baton forward, resisting that temptation to become complacent, so
that our progress can continue in all the ways that
it's needed.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
So how are we passing that baton.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
Today, for one, we're honoring the contributions of our fore
mothers like Anita Hill and ensuring that their stories and
their experiences don't get lost as we continue.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
To clar our way forward.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
In giving these flowers to Anita, we acknowledge the teachings
that she's bestowed upon us that one woman's voice can
trigger national awareness. We thank you for your courage and
your enduring legacy to fight to engender based violence, Anita,
and may we all continue to harry the baton forward
(12:01):
and pass it on as we need to. So welcome
back for the grad chapter corner.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
I want to give you a chance to, you know,
tell the people what has been going on for you
and with you in these past two years, because it's
been like a good two years since we last.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Spoke, has it?
Speaker 1 (12:29):
It sure has, which is just wild, yeah, wild, And
there's a lot in the in the space. But I
just also want to start by just thanking you for
your interview that we did a couple of years ago,
because I was listening back to it the other day
as I was like editing and finalizing everything for your
episode release this week, and you were so gracious and
(12:53):
sharing with us the space that you were in at
the time with the loss and the grief that you
were noving of your dad. So I just wanted to
start by thanking you for sharing all of that with us.
It was so it's just so touching to hear you
talk about it in your episode, and I wanted to
make sure I save some space for that at the
(13:14):
top and just you know, shared some gratitude and some
just you know connection around that piece.
Speaker 3 (13:20):
I was two years ago. Well, fun fact she got
new grief.
Speaker 2 (13:25):
Yes, as we do, as we do, as.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
We do, two years don't feel like two years. I
feel like time is it real and more. And also
probably because this has been the longest seven months of
my life in this presidency, it really has felt like
four years and it's not. And I hate that for us.
(13:49):
It's real wild. But I'm excited to talk about this.
It's like perfect timing. There's so many things happening in
my little orbit, little world, so let's just let's start
with the heavy first.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
And let's ease in.
Speaker 3 (14:06):
You know, grief is something that my therapist and I
have been working on and working through for a very
long time with my grandfather, who I called my dad
passing away in twenty twenty three. It was like heavy,
and I didn't really know what to do with it.
You know, my mother was murdered when I was young,
and so that was different. I didn't have as much
attachment in seeing and being there and helping. And so
(14:31):
it is now twenty twenty five and at the beginning
of the year, my cousin died in a car accident
very close to me, is the second eldest. I was
like my little brother and that I get emotional just
like a That really was hard and is still very
hard for me. And then a few months later, one
(14:53):
of my childhood best friends died, who I had actually
taken space from because of her alcoholism, and she died
of roastus up the liver at thirty seven, and I
was like, okay, not get off. And on top of
all of that, I believe when we were talking, I
was working in professional wrestling as a mental health provider.
Probably I no longer do that because they did not
(15:15):
renew my contract, and that was a big It felt
like a big loss of losses all at once. So
that grieving period was wild. But during that I also
had three breakups, two really significant breakups. So I was
grieving a whole bunch of shit, just grief, grief, break
gerp grief, just boo boo boom. It was like the
(15:37):
Challenge Olympics. And I will say, look at her, and
she's coming out, she's shining. It's been a lot of work.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
Yeah, it just it's been a lot of work.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
And so I'm excited to like talk through kind of
all of it. And I will start with, you know,
kind of what came from the grief and being a
survivor and seeing all the things. Was really realizing that
grief never stops for us humans, as black women, as
sexual assault survivors, as trauma survivors, and I kind of
(16:06):
wanted to speak to that, especially coming from a survivor's lens,
because again, we're always surviving something unfortunately. And so I
started speaking to grief in that survivorship and how do
we exist in both sides of it while it's constantly happening.
So I created a class grief for survivors. It's online,
there's a sliding scale, the links are in all the
(16:28):
things I have, and it's on my Instagram and I'm
super excited to do it. This is the third time
I'm doing this class. This is also newly freshly back teaching.
I have not been teaching for a while, and I
came back in thinking, do I still know how to
do this? Can I can? I have these conversations and
(16:50):
all the things, and as soon as I open my mouth,
I was like, girl, that was so cute. You got this.
It just felt like riding the bike, which was hard
for me to learn. Let's keep let's be always.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
Right and truthful about it.
Speaker 3 (17:01):
It is not an easy process. Easy, y'all. Stop.
Speaker 2 (17:04):
But the return is what we focus on. The return.
Speaker 3 (17:07):
The return, Yes, And so I'm excited to be doing
grief as a survivor, and you know, that has been
a beautiful process. I am working on developing new classes.
I am refreshing classes. I am working on refreshing my workbook,
and all of that is coming. And everything that I
(17:28):
do is, you know, has a sliding scale adaptability. I
started doing one to one work again as of April
twenty twenty five. I open my books back. It is
very different than I've ever done it before. Now I
allow clients to have full autonomy. I give them here's
my calendar, it's the schedule. Is attached to my calendar.
(17:49):
If it is open, you can book it. And for
those that are of the global majority and professional wrestlers,
I do offer a fifty percent off discount for sixty
minute and ninety minute sessions. I offer a free twenty
five minute alignment call because I think it's important. You
should audition your the people you're working with. You should
get in their business. You should ask those questions because
(18:10):
they are going to be working and supporting you. And
so I have that setup now, which has been really fun.
I've had such amazing clients and talking about sex after
trauma has been so big and like helping these individuals
get back into their bodies. And I do it very differently,
probably than other people. I make people have self dates
(18:31):
and people go, I don't want to it. I'm like,
you thought it was going to be like a one
step No, there's like five steps and you are navigating.
I'll tell you just for people want to know. So
the first step is you know, feeding yourself. We don't
we internally like getting into your body. You cook something,
you go buy something, whatever, and then there's body movement,
(18:51):
dance in the kitchen, do yoga, go for a walk,
I don't care. And of course this is quick snaps.
After that, there is a cleansing, shower, a bath, and
it's not just like oh, I'm gonna take a shower. No, no, no,
you better slow it down and be intentional. Get out
that good bathwash, get out those good sprays, do that scrub.
It's a whole process. And then from there we start
(19:13):
getting into the bedroom. We talk about positions or we
talk about touch, and it depends on the client and
who I'm working with, what order we do it in.
And it's not the way people think, like touch is
really slow. I want you to figure out where you
want to be touched, where you don't want to be touched,
the pressure, the style, the time. People don't think about that.
(19:36):
Positions right, like sexual assault, You are in some type
of position. Are you still you've been trying to do
that position? Haven't been triggered? Oh no, I didn't think
about that. Like navigating, how do we upgrade, how do
we downgrade? How do we use that language? And then
eventually we get into touching ourselves. Is it a toy?
Is it a thing? We figure out your erotic blueprint,
(19:57):
what do you need to exist? And that's just the
started it. So that's something else I'm doing. My intimacy
coordinator training company Cinema. We're doing our first film festival,
which applications August fifteen, get them in three minutes of
intimacy and or if you have like a long film
(20:19):
and you have three minutes, three minutes is the key here.
You tell us the time spots, we can get it
in for you August fifteenth. It's coming quick. We do
have a late deadline in September. Go follow Cinema find
out more. And the film festival is focused around intimacy,
so many different styles. We're so excited. We've gotten some
really fun and wild things and I was like, Okay,
(20:40):
I've never this is crazy, and that's exciting. And tending
the garden, my baby, my baby. I've really been wanting
to have a community space and I think that that
is so important for survivors, and so last month we
launched our online community space for survivors, and so each
(21:03):
area represents our pillars, and I added a bonus pillar,
our sex positive space, just because that is the support
groups I've been doing for the past seven years. And
so I've kind of just merged everything in one home,
and there's three different options. You want to get the
paid option and let me tell you why. There's a
free option that you can go check it out. You
will always get resources resources you never have to that
(21:26):
is forever, and you also get journal prompts every day.
You sign up for twenty dollars nineteen ninety five a month,
you get to choose which community space you want to
be in. You get to be able to attend me
support groups, which will be twice a month. That is
a twenty nineteen ninety five space. There is a twenty
nine to ninety five space there. For that you get
(21:48):
an upgrade and a discount to classes that are outside
of the space. In the nineteen ninety five space, there's
classes that live there. You get the recordings, but if
you want to pay a little bit more, you get
discounts the classes. You get discounts to online and in
person events. And so you spend a lot of money
doing nonsense, spend a lot little money on yourself. Come
(22:09):
find some community. You know it is moderated and reminder
of the spaces. There is a cisgendered male space, there
is a trans and non a binary space. There's a
sex worker space, a college age eighteen to twenty five.
There's a disabled space, and in these spaces, I feel
like I'm missing someone. Women of color, excuse me. And
in these spaces, when you sign up, you get to
(22:31):
choose who am I like. I want you to self identify,
So if you are a sex worker and a woman
of color, you get to be in those spaces. They're
not for cismen, they're not for trans and non binary
folks unless you're in you check those boxes. We want
this community to be yours. We want you to be
in those spaces with people so you could have those
conversations and lean on each other. It's very new. We
(22:54):
had about twenty y'all in there so far, but you
have to do the upgrade to get all of the things.
Nineteen ninety five a month and I think, last but
not least, in the update, before you really ask me questions,
I applied for a PhD program. I just thought, doctor Jiminique,
I would look, you don't me real cute, real cute,
(23:15):
and so I am excited. Research isn't necessarily my jam.
But then I realized I've been researching my whole life.
Speaker 1 (23:24):
I was about to say I was about that. I
was about to read Future Doctor Dominica, because yes, you
have been doing the Yes, you've been doing the work,
the research work.
Speaker 3 (23:35):
Yes, she's been outside and I mean, if anything, she's inquisitive,
so she'd been researching in her own world. So I
am excited for those interviews and future goals as well.
But besides that, she's happy. She's helping you. Just finish
a thirty day yoga challenge, about to do another one,
And I think those are the things just staying sane
(23:57):
for you to have questions. But like, it's been a
long road.
Speaker 1 (24:03):
Yeah, I can only imagine because I'm just thinking about
where both of us. I feel like both of us.
I listen back to our interview from two years ago,
and I just I hear how much we were going
through at the time, And so you know, to come
back and have a chance to have you just tell
(24:24):
us about what is going on in your life and
see the glow and hear the passion and hear the excitement.
It is so necessary just from a community standpoint, all
of the work that you're doing and is so necessary
for the continued growth of the movement and where folks
are at right now for this work to exist, So
(24:45):
thank you for running it back for some programs and
you know, building it for others. But also it just
it sounds like what I'm hearing from you is joy
in the work, and I'm so glad to be able
to hear that in how you're describing it, because it
(25:07):
is very difficult to get to joy through grief. But
I'm so I feel honored to be able to hear
that and witness that through you and from you, because
I know and I can recall where you came from.
So I'm just on a human standpoint, glad to see
where you are now and grateful for all the work
(25:30):
that you're doing.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
It's true, you know, when we are constantly grieving, and
I think as a country right now there is a
collective grief because we didn't think this was me really back.
We had hoped that this was not where we were
going to be because I didn't vote for this, That's
(25:53):
not what I have voted for, and now we are
collectively grieving. Black women are the highest unemployed individuals in
this country right now, and we are also the most
degree carrying and suddenly the most gun carrying because people
are always on our necks and the grief of what
(26:16):
we should be doing right now, what we have to
be doing, and what we think is coming. That shit
is heavy because people constantly go, well, what about the
black ladies? What are they doing? Girl? You don't leave
me alone. I'm getting a snack.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
Okay, we're focusing on ourselves, but we.
Speaker 3 (26:37):
Haven't been allowed and still aren't really, but grief doesn't stop.
And I think again, shout out to Betty my therapist.
Hey girl, the constant reminder and support, and you know,
it's so much easier to do this with my clients.
But like the reminder of you have to work with it, right,
(26:59):
like sexual assault, it's not going anywhere. You have to
go through it and navigate through it. She kept being like,
I don't know. I feel like you try to skip
over things. That's what you get for you get a
black lady therapist. I think I need to call. I'm
gonna text her after this actually get a session. But
she was like, you have to go through the thing.
(27:20):
I don't think you're doing it. I feel like you're
avoiding it. And then I did my own ten day
silent retreat last year, my third, my first personal without
going to a retreat center. And then there was a
wedding for one of my close friends in February in Maui.
She's like family, like one of my cousins. And I
(27:41):
went to Maui and the way I help water Maui,
because the way I cried all over that island and
meditated and prayed and walked labyrinths and let the sun
bless me, and to come back and go okay, I
like I felt like, and I felt like felt like
(28:05):
to the ground. I left a lot of that there.
I got to release it, and I came back knowing
I had sixty days left on my wrestling contracts. They
gave us sixty days because of mental health. Knowing that
I didn't know what was next, and it was scary
and nervous, but I had to go through it. And
the reminder of you've done so much and survived so much,
(28:27):
so that is also the reminder for all of us,
this is not the worst day we've ever navigated. This
is not the worst season. It's shitty, it's shitty outside,
let's be real, Yeah, but we have the tools in
the community within us if we allow them to show
up and support us. That is what I learned in
the last two years is if you allow these people
(28:48):
that are like I'm here to actually show that they're here,
it will change your life and it will help save you.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
I just want people to sit on that for a time.
That's beautiful. That's a beautiful sentiment, and I appreciate you
sharing that. I did want to ask you a quick question.
You had mentioned in your one on one work that
(29:22):
you allow your clients and the folks that you're working
with to ask questions of you, And that's sort of
built into your practice with them and your It sounds
like in your intake with them, ask questions of like
what the expectations are, check in with you, be very
transparent on your end about like what they will get
(29:44):
from you and how that collaborative process will work. So
for people who are like looking for someone who does
what you're doing and who maybe you know, need to
see that in person, so can't work or don't want
to work with you one on one, what are those
like some of those questions that you think people should
be asking to get at, like is this person like
(30:04):
the right person for me? Are they going to, like
you know, understand who I am?
Speaker 3 (30:10):
Yeah? Absolutely, ask what they've studied. Right, Like, I am
not a licensed therapist by choice, right. I chose to
navigate this, And I think that's also a good reminder.
I am not a licensed therapist by choice because of
the people that I work with. Because I know, if
I need to go make a ride to help save you,
I'm not reporting that to nobody. We're gonna move, We're
(30:31):
gonna get your really need to go. That was a choice. Now,
the amount of student dead I have, let me tell you,
she's got degrees, and so again that is a choice.
I've been studying psychology since I was sixteen. I've studied
merit and family therapy. I've studied hell psychology, I've studied
alternative medicine. I you know, there's all of these things
(30:52):
that I have a background it that I haven't even named.
Ask people what are they practice it? And you can
also ask like how do you work with survivors? Pay
attention to how they respond to you when you are
sharing your information, if you're sharing a bit of your story,
if you are sharing your background, pay attention to how
(31:15):
they respond. I remember the first therapist that I went to.
It was a small Asian woman and I was sharing
about my mother's murder and my sexual assault. And she
sat there and this lady literally grasped her pearls and said,
oh my god, I said, girl, will never see you again.
That's wild. I didn't even tell you nothing yet. So
pay attention to that. You know, ask what their clientele
(31:39):
looks like. Who's their demographic, right, I have a lot
of women of color, and that makes sense to me.
In the beginning, I had a lot more white women,
and I think as I have evolved and gotten more
comfortable in my skin, there's also other women of color
that go, yeah, I'm gonna need that, you know. Asking
(32:01):
how they speak to their clients, I think is also important.
I don't sugarcoat it. I am not one of those
people that's like a fluffy person. I am direct, I
am honest. I will never harm you. I will hold
you in space, but I will also hold you accountable.
And so if you don't want to be pushed out
of your comfort zone, not an aggressive way, but like
(32:23):
you have to move past that to grow. If that's
not what you're looking for, I'm not your girl.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (32:28):
I think those are really good questions, and you know,
asking how their sessions work, right, like, that's also really important.
I explain in the beginning what an alignment call looks
like and why we're here, and it's so you can
get a vibe on me and so I can get
a vibe on you. Because at the end of who
I go all, if we're not good together or I
don't have those skills to support you, you know, go
(32:50):
research who you're working with. Use Google. She's free, she's
your friend, look me up. I would tell people after
this alignment call, if you you know, if you have
other questions me, if you have other thoughts, get in
my business, go through my social media, and for some people,
ask them what their political views are. That might be
(33:10):
very important to you. People like that shouldn't matter. I
think it does, and if you also think it does,
ask those questions right, and then ask what does working
with you look like? Again, I'm going to emphasize that
what does a first session look like with me? A
first session is kind of like a download. You share
with me what you want me to share. You share
with me your goals. We'll have a little bit of
(33:31):
that in the beginning, but like in the alignment call,
but like really we'll get into it. Let's figure out
what you want. And also there's a reminder of like healing,
the way we navigate it will not be linear. It
is going to be up and down. One day you're
going to walk in and be like, here's the thing.
And Also I take notes during sessions. No one would
understand them. Sometimes I'll understand why I go and look
(33:51):
it's crazy, but I take notes after every session. I
want you to be focused. I want you to show up. Also,
I give homework because I don't believe that healing and
navigating healing is really done in thirty minutes and sixty
minutes and ninety minutes. It's ongoing. How do we continue
building these tools if we're just like, all right, girl'll
(34:12):
see you in two week, sixty minutes again. No, right,
And if you're not willing to commit and go through
the things, I am not for you. I am a
trauma companion. I am not a trauma leader. And in
a companion, I'm here to support you when we are
sharing back and forth. But we have to do the
equal work. Yeah, and so it's active, it's active, it's overgrowing.
(34:37):
And I curse in session and I'm going to be
like that is shitty. No, when you are trying to
lightly walk around and tap foot around your abuser. Absolutely not.
We will be calling them in and holding them accountable
in that session because this might be the only space
you get to do that. We don't just well and
(34:58):
he no, no you, he harmed you. That woman harmed you,
that person harmed you, and that is not okay, And
that was shitty the way people responded. If your therapist
or your mental health provider is not going that hard
for you, I'm just saying, question them, just question them.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
Yeah, because that is a certain ethic that they're showing
up with and that is not That is not what
is going to facilitate everyone's healing. And some people need
a little bit more direct, Some people need a little
bit more straight to the point, like no, no bullshit.
Speaker 3 (35:36):
And people mean coddling. It's just not me, but I
know people that do it. And I will also recommend
and give you resources to other people, and that's okay.
Speaker 2 (35:46):
I'm not mad.
Speaker 3 (35:47):
I want you to get whatever you need.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
This is such an important I think toolkit and offering
of a tool that you're giving people right now, because
we don't hear that we hear.
Speaker 3 (35:58):
Oh, have you.
Speaker 1 (35:59):
Considered there have you considered, you know, talking to someone
that's always the go to, but it's rarely met with
or paired with an intentionality behind how you navigate trying
to see who's the right fit, and so many of
us kind of enter that space and are re traumatized.
I have a similar story of a woman that I
went to for the first time in a mental health
(36:22):
space and it was just so clearly the wrong fit
and she had diagnosed me within two minutes of me
talking about what my experience was, and that's just you know,
that is not right for most of us. So we
like there was a level of discernment, yeah, that that
we need to have in navigating that so that we
can get what we need.
Speaker 2 (36:41):
Out of it.
Speaker 1 (36:41):
Because truthfully, at the end of the day, it is
about you and what you're you know, what you are
getting out of it, and how it helps you or
does not help you.
Speaker 3 (36:51):
Absolutely. So another thing about the community space is I
like a trial, you know, you sometimes you got to
feel off the water and within the community space. If
you want to see what the higher space looks like,
in the higher price space, the nineteen ninety five or
the twenty nine ninety five space, you can sign up
(37:11):
for that. You get seventy two hours to kind of
walk around, poke around, get in the business, look how
it's structured, and then you will be prompted to enter
card information. And so if you decide to not put
your card information in no worries, you just will stay
on the free tier, which you will still have access
to resources and you will still have access to like
(37:32):
journal prompts. So that is always something that is free
for folks forever in navigating. But you do go, try
it out, poke yourself around. What you won't see is
the support groups. And the reason you won't see the
support groups is we need to have enough people that
are signed up in those spaces. What does that mean?
What does enough people look like? I need at least
(37:53):
four people four just for I need at least four
people in each pillar to be able to hold and
host these support groups because two people that's not a group.
Three people, eh, four people, it feels more supportive. As
someone that's been doing this for seven plus years, I
figured it out. I've done again the research look at me,
(38:17):
and you know it allows for more connection getting in
those message boards, start building that community, because as of
right now, we have this beautiful community that hasn't been
fully access to its full potential yet. So come join us.
We're here waiting on you.
Speaker 1 (38:32):
A question, is there somebody is there, like a right
person to join the community, like you know, is there
is there a right person versus a person where it's like, okay,
maybe this isn't the space for you.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
I don't know if that's if you.
Speaker 3 (38:49):
Are a sexual assault survivor this is the space for you, right,
And so I believe that when we first started tending
the Garden, I had a pushback from white women, right
because originally attending the Garden was for women of color
and it was supposed to just be retreats. Pandemic happened,
as we all remember, things changed and I realized when
(39:13):
I really was able to pull back that there were
so many other communities that had also been marginalized. And
so cis gendered. Men, If you are a man and
cis gendered, that's for you. It doesn't matter age, race, whatever,
eighteen and up. Sure if you are a woman of color,
now it was you know, of course I was like
black women, yes, but also women of color in general.
(39:36):
You're good to go. If you are a sex worker
of any level of sex work. We know that no
means no in any capacity, even if it's your job,
then that fits for you. If you are disabled any
type of disability, who are we and we're not gatekeepers?
Are what that looks like? Trans and non binary folks, Yes,
it is one space because I understand that there is
(39:56):
crossover and also there is it so you know, if
you want to have different co versas and things you
do it. You know, the college age folks, it is
a different conversation for some folks because you are actively
in school while these other folks might not be. That's
a different lived experience, right, And so we wanted to
make sure that people just felt seen and not necessarily
(40:21):
continue to be like, oh, well, I'm not disabled enough,
or I'm not this kind of sex worker, like am
I a woman of color? And like yes, the answer
is yes. And so if you are a sexual assault
survivor and you identify as a survivor or a victim
or whatever language you want, if you have been harmed
by a sexual act, a devian acts, someone's put their
(40:42):
hands on you, their genitals on you, in you, any
of that type of activity, the space is for you beautiful.
Speaker 1 (40:49):
And I think that's such a helpful thing for folks
to hear is don't self exclude, you know, test it out. Yeah,
and I'm so glad that you have that opportunity, that
window for people to test it out, dip atoe it,
see if it's the right space, and then you know,
you can lean in a little bit further if it
feels right and comfortable, which hopefully you do in that regard.
(41:10):
But don't let yourself talk yourself out of an opportunity
to find some community, because we can't get through this
alone and we can't heal alone.
Speaker 3 (41:18):
Absolutely, you could also, you know, on the back end,
we need your info. But if you want to go
by a different name, you can right, like whatever type
of safety you need in this like, you definitely can.
You can communicate with each other, right you can block
people because I think autonomy is also really important. That's
why we have it in the beginning. You choose what
(41:40):
level of support you want. You get to choose which
communities and we will look at the background. So we
put you fill out the form. We physically put you
in there so we will check and see and look again.
We research it. We want to make sure that you
are not just trying to get into a space and
cause harm. And if someone does get in, because people
get into communities all the time, quickly, I have someone
(42:01):
that monitors. And I also want to note that Tending
the Garden is created by survivors and ran by survivors.
When we have the support groups, survivors predominantly run them,
and or we have therapists interns that are also going
to be running these groups. The support groups are all digital.
You can be in your bed, type in and everything
(42:23):
in those support goots. It gets fed through and we
make sure that it is safe for you. We're not
just letting anybody say anything all willy nilly. And the
reason I wanted that as well, you get to have
your identity, you get to type, you don't have to
show your face. You get to customize this experience to
a way that still allows you to feel somewhat safe
(42:44):
and in control. And I think that again was really important.
As we were building it. It took me a while
to be like, Okay, finally, finally do it, Like it's
been ready for a few months, and I was like, fine, okay,
just do it. Oh and it's been really good I'm
just continuously trying to get the word out. I think
it is something that people need and do want, they
just don't know about it yet.
Speaker 2 (43:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (43:05):
Absolutely, And I'm glad you mentioned that it's virtual, because
I'd had that question before and completely forgot to come
back to it.
Speaker 2 (43:13):
Out of the.
Speaker 1 (43:15):
Upcoming opportunities that you told us about, how many of
them are any of them virtual?
Speaker 2 (43:19):
So you talked about the.
Speaker 1 (43:21):
Talk back, the film festival, your one on one work,
and your grief first survivors classes are any of those
virtuals so that anyone.
Speaker 2 (43:31):
Can access them from anywhere.
Speaker 3 (43:32):
Absolutely one to one stuff is only virtual, and that
was also important to me. Is one I like to
be in my own house?
Speaker 2 (43:42):
Oh yes, same, but.
Speaker 3 (43:44):
Also because I wanted folks to be able to access
me wherever they needed to access, and so that is
all virtual. The wonder One stuff is virtual, the support groups,
the whole community is virtual unless we do have outside events.
The August twelfth class, the Grief is a survivor. It
is through Shebop, the sex toy store that is in Portland,
(44:08):
but it is virtual and there is flighting scales for
tickets and all the things. My classes that are online.
Those are virtual, so I'm working on redoing things so
you if you still want them, they're up there. And
there's also when you go to my website, there's already
a discount coke there, and you don't have to be like, oh,
jim no, no, it's already there. If you need it,
use it, we put it there. If you're like, no,
(44:30):
I don't want it, I don't need it, cool, but
we give it to you upfront so you don't also
have to feel like asking, because you know it's hard
for people asking for help, and so if I put
it up front, they can go, oh, I get to
make this choice. A lot of the things in the
ways that I navigate also is about autonomy because when
we are survivors, especially if sexual assault, we didn't opt
(44:51):
into that. That was taken from us. So I'm slowly
I'm tricking o'll, I'm slowly building that autonomy back up
a little by little.
Speaker 1 (45:00):
So I just want to thank you for all of
this incredible stuff that you're doing right now. And I
want to say, Jimini Ka, thank you so much for
coming back and returning and you know, giving us this update,
because you're doing some really incredible stuff right now. It's
so timely, it's so necessary, it's so needed, and I
(45:20):
just thank you for bringing it back and giving us
all an update and a little glimpse into what you
what you're up to these days.
Speaker 3 (45:28):
Thank you for asking for the update, because life, life's
to lose time. It sure is ongoing. But yes, thank
you for having me back and getting that update anytime.
Speaker 2 (45:40):
Thank you. We'll talk soon, all right, y'all.
Speaker 1 (45:45):
I hope you enjoyed that catchup combo as much as
I did. I want to hear how you all are
tending to your own gardens, what fills you up? How
are you actively pouring into your mind, body, and spirit
these days. Check in with us on Instagram at the end,
on sorority, and on TikTok. You can also write in
an email if you have any questions or comments that
(46:06):
you would like to see addressed on the show, or
if you want to let us know what's going on
with you and answer this question in a voice note.
I can't wait to hear from you, and until next time,
take care of yourself, take care of one another, and
release whatever shame or gilt you may be feeling about
the harm that's been done to you. You are not
alone and I literally cannot even begin to tell you
(46:28):
how excited I am for next week's roll call guests.
So make sure you are subscribed to the show on
your favorite podcast platform so you don't miss it.
Speaker 2 (46:36):
And while you're at.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
It, please rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts.
It really helps the show grow, so I would sincerely
appreciate you taking the time to do so, and don't
forget to stay safe, stay connected, and remember this is
a safe space, not a quiet space.
Speaker 2 (46:53):
I'll see you all next time.
Speaker 1 (47:05):
The Unwanted Sorority is hosted in executive producer Beymy Leandro Tate,
Our executive producer is Joel Money, our producer is Carmen Loren,
and original cover art is created by Savannah Euler. I
would also like to be a special thanks to the
iHeart Podcast Next Up program for helping bring the show
to life. Also all of the guests who have taken
the step in sharing their story with you all on
these episodes. And finally, to all the members of the
(47:28):
Sorority who will never tell their story, we see you
and your story matters.
Welcome to another episode of The Unwanted Sorority. I'm your host, Leetra.
Speaker 2 (00:09):
This is a space.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Created for and by Black women, fem's, and gender expansive
folks who've experienced sexual violence. Whether you've lifted, love someone
who has, or simply want to hold space.
Speaker 2 (00:19):
You're welcome here.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
We are kicking off part two of last week's conversation,
and so this week we're going to continue with our
flowers for the Founder segment for Miss Anita Hill, and
we're also going to be giving flowers to Kimberly Crenshaw
and highlighting her contributions to why Anita's story is so
significant for us in this moment. None of this work
is not in isolation, and kimberly support of Anita.
Speaker 2 (00:43):
Is a true testament to that.
Speaker 1 (00:45):
And so we'll also catch up with Jiminika after two years,
where you'll get a chance to dive into how she's
been tending to her garden during that time, because life
has not stopped lifing in the meantime, so let's get
into it.
Speaker 2 (01:04):
Last week we gave.
Speaker 1 (01:05):
Flowers to our founder and sister, Anita Hill, and this
week I want to continue with Anita's story and highlight
a key player on her team, and that woman is
none other than Kimberly Crenshaw. So we've talked about Kimberly's
(01:25):
introduction of the term intersectionality on a previous episode here,
but she actually played a major role in Anita's legal
team at the time. In an interview with The Guardian,
Kimberly Crenshaw describes feeling dejected and exhausted from having to
navigate the social climate while being on Anita's team. One
moment she remembered vividly.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
It was actually the day.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Before Clarence Thomas's confirmation, and as she was leaving the
Capitol Building one evening, she saw a group of black people,
mostly women, gathered at the bottom of the steps in
a prayer circle, and she recalled letting out a sigh
of relief as she walked towards them. She was thinking, Oh,
thank God, a place we can go and embrace each
(02:08):
other because this is a struggle. And that's a direct
quote from her from the article. And dred immediately flooded
Kimberly as she got closer to the prayer circle because
she started noticing what they were wearing. They were wearing
t shirts that read quote support Clarence Thomas, and she
(02:30):
started to overhear some of the things they were talking about,
these declarations, calling Anita a Jezebel, and Kimberly said it
was like a horror film. In that article, she says, quote,
you think you're safe, but it turns out that the
people you're running to are actually infected with whatever you're
running from. As Omna Moden, author of the Guardian's article
(02:55):
on Kimberly Crenshaw, describes it quote with feminist supporting Hill
and anti racist activists defending Thomas, twin, calls for equality
were being put in opposition to each other, and so
Anita's case cemented the need to understand intersectionality, which is
the way that being both black and a woman meant
(03:17):
facing unique vulnerabilities, and in this case, it doubled the
doubts around Anita's testimony. Sexual harassment has largely been seen
as a white woman's issue, but Anita forced the world
to confront that reality that black women too are victimized
in this way and are often not believed. Watching those hearings,
(03:40):
black feminist scholars around the country were outraged at how
Anita was treated and how her voice was dismissed, so
much so that just one month after the hearings, sixteen
hundred black women lent their money and their names for
the purchase of a full page ad in The New
York Times with the headline that read, in bold and dead,
(04:00):
sinner in the middle of the page quote African American
women in defense of ourselves. The statement condemned the Senates
racist and sexist treatment of Professor Anita Hill, saying quote
malicious defamation of Professor Hill insulted all women of African
descent and sent a dangerous message to any woman who
(04:23):
might contemplate a sexual harassment complaint end quote.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
This collective action.
Speaker 1 (04:30):
Was led by scholars like Barbara Ransby, Deborah King, and
Elsa Barkley Brown, and it was a demand that black
women's voices be heard and believed. As Barbara Ransby put
it in a twenty eighteen article in the Washington Post,
quote we were all Anita Hill at that moment. Most
(04:50):
of us had experienced some form of harassment. We found
her story perfectly believable. End quote. That article in the
New York Times served as a declaration and a pledge
that they would continue to fight for black women's dignity
in response to oppressors, and they clarified that this included oppressors.
Quote no matter what color, period, no one will speak
(05:15):
for us but ourselves end quote. After a grueling day,
Anita's testimony finally ended. Clarence Thomas was ultimately confirmed to
the Supreme Court with a narrow Senate vote of fifty
two to forty eight. But similar to this lifetime appointment
of his, Anita would also take on a lifetime appointment
(05:36):
as a history maker, a movement founder who we can
give flowers to in spaces such as the Unwanted Sorority,
and an activist for women's rights. Her life would never
be the same. While she received thousands of letters of support,
she also continued to receive death threats and hate mail.
(05:57):
Even years later, Anita was further traumatized by institutional shunning
and marginalization at the University of Oklahoma, with conservative state
lawmakers calling for her to be fired. Thankfully, she had
already earned tenure at the institution by that time, so
her job was secure, but she recalled feeling uncomfortable, and
(06:18):
she even received comments from other colleagues who were noting
their discomfort at all the attention she was receiving and
despite these very real attacks on her safety, well being,
and integrity. Anita's testimony marked a turning point in how
the United States talked about sexual misconduct and workplace power dynamics.
Organizations like the National Women's Law Center, for example, describe
(06:42):
how the phones began ringing off the hook with women
who were finally ready to come forward with their own
stories of workplace sexual harassment after hearing Anita's experience. Anita's
impact reached Congress too, resulting in the passing of a
law in nineteen ninety one that strengthened the rights of
sexual harassment victims, who could now seek damages in court,
(07:03):
just like victims of racial discrimination could. Further, nineteen ninety
two became dubbed as quote the Year of the Woman,
when four new women sought seats in the United States
Senate and one This tripled the number of elected women
senators in one election cycle. It was as if women
across the country agreed to refuse to let another all
(07:25):
male Senate panel mistreat a woman again. Let me put
a pin in that for a moment. We're going to
come back to it in a sec Anita would go
on to leave Oklahoma for a fresh start in Massachusetts
and join Brandeis University in nineteen ninety eight as a
faculty member, where she continues to teach courses on gender, race,
(07:46):
social policy, and legal history. Her autobiography was released in
nineteen ninety eight, which is titled Speaking Truth to Power,
where she described that time period in her role in
Clarence Thomas's confirmation controversy in her own words. Her second book,
Reimagining Equality, Stories of Gender, Race, and Finding Home was
(08:09):
published in twenty eleven, and she takes readers on a
journey of understanding what it means to be at home
in this country. She channeled that experience into a lifelong
mission that ensures that what happened to her, both the
sexual harassment and the public disbelief, what happen to fewer
(08:31):
and fewer women after her.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
So let's pick up that previous pen that I put
in the story.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
Fast forward to twenty eighteen, nearly thirty years after Anita's
testimony at the Senate hearing, the nation is focused on
yet another woman, doctor Christine Blasiford, who is preparing to
testify against another Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh, who she
says sexually assaulted her when she younger. Parallels between Anita
(09:02):
and Christine were so unmistakable, both women standing before largely
male senators to testify, both recalling painful truths about their experience,
and both navigating widespread division amongst Americans regarding whether they
believed these women or not.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
At this point, it was clear that.
Speaker 1 (09:22):
Anita's legacy had helped to shift the foundation from which
most people were operating regarding their understanding of sexual harassment
and sexual violence in general, and the hashtagmy Too movement
had turned into a global campaign at the time, creating
another large social movement through which women and people were
finding their ways towards speaking their truth. And Anita's book
(09:45):
that was published in twenty twenty one, titled Believing Our
Thirty Year Journey to End Gender Violence, she describes how
her testimony in nineteen ninety one not only transformed her life,
but it sparked a national conversation about gender based on
which she said propelled over the decades so that actions
(10:05):
like the hashtechnique to movement and the testimony of Christine
showed that this conversation is far from over. In that book,
Anita both celebrates how much more awareness there is now,
noting how we have a lexicon for words like sexual
harassment and consent, and how survivors have formed networks of
support just like the unwonted sorority, and research in these
(10:27):
areas have expanded, But she also describes how deeply entrenched
the problem still is in our society. For example, she
argues that gender based violence is pervasive, describing it as
an epidemic that infects campus', workplaces, homes in all areas
of society, and she argues that it's intersectional in that
(10:49):
biases of race, class, and sexual orientation make it so
that women of color, LGBTQ plus individuals, and other marginalized
groups are still suffering them most and believe the least.
She also likens the struggle for gender equality to that
of running a relay race. She calls it a long
(11:10):
marathon of many generations, not a quick sprint. She says
that we owe it to future generations to keep passing
the baton forward, resisting that temptation to become complacent, so
that our progress can continue in all the ways that
it's needed.
Speaker 2 (11:26):
So how are we passing that baton.
Speaker 1 (11:28):
Today, for one, we're honoring the contributions of our fore
mothers like Anita Hill and ensuring that their stories and
their experiences don't get lost as we continue.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
To clar our way forward.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
In giving these flowers to Anita, we acknowledge the teachings
that she's bestowed upon us that one woman's voice can
trigger national awareness. We thank you for your courage and
your enduring legacy to fight to engender based violence, Anita,
and may we all continue to harry the baton forward
(12:01):
and pass it on as we need to. So welcome
back for the grad chapter corner.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (12:16):
I want to give you a chance to, you know,
tell the people what has been going on for you
and with you in these past two years, because it's
been like a good two years since we last.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Spoke, has it?
Speaker 1 (12:29):
It sure has, which is just wild, yeah, wild, And
there's a lot in the in the space. But I
just also want to start by just thanking you for
your interview that we did a couple of years ago,
because I was listening back to it the other day
as I was like editing and finalizing everything for your
episode release this week, and you were so gracious and
(12:53):
sharing with us the space that you were in at
the time with the loss and the grief that you
were noving of your dad. So I just wanted to
start by thanking you for sharing all of that with us.
It was so it's just so touching to hear you
talk about it in your episode, and I wanted to
make sure I save some space for that at the
(13:14):
top and just you know, shared some gratitude and some
just you know connection around that piece.
Speaker 3 (13:20):
I was two years ago. Well, fun fact she got
new grief.
Speaker 2 (13:25):
Yes, as we do, as we do, as.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
We do, two years don't feel like two years. I
feel like time is it real and more. And also
probably because this has been the longest seven months of
my life in this presidency, it really has felt like
four years and it's not. And I hate that for us.
(13:49):
It's real wild. But I'm excited to talk about this.
It's like perfect timing. There's so many things happening in
my little orbit, little world, so let's just let's start
with the heavy first.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
And let's ease in.
Speaker 3 (14:06):
You know, grief is something that my therapist and I
have been working on and working through for a very
long time with my grandfather, who I called my dad
passing away in twenty twenty three. It was like heavy,
and I didn't really know what to do with it.
You know, my mother was murdered when I was young,
and so that was different. I didn't have as much
attachment in seeing and being there and helping. And so
(14:31):
it is now twenty twenty five and at the beginning
of the year, my cousin died in a car accident
very close to me, is the second eldest. I was
like my little brother and that I get emotional just
like a That really was hard and is still very
hard for me. And then a few months later, one
(14:53):
of my childhood best friends died, who I had actually
taken space from because of her alcoholism, and she died
of roastus up the liver at thirty seven, and I
was like, okay, not get off. And on top of
all of that, I believe when we were talking, I
was working in professional wrestling as a mental health provider.
Probably I no longer do that because they did not
(15:15):
renew my contract, and that was a big It felt
like a big loss of losses all at once. So
that grieving period was wild. But during that I also
had three breakups, two really significant breakups. So I was
grieving a whole bunch of shit, just grief, grief, break
gerp grief, just boo boo boom. It was like the
(15:37):
Challenge Olympics. And I will say, look at her, and
she's coming out, she's shining. It's been a lot of work.
Speaker 2 (15:43):
Yeah, it just it's been a lot of work.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
And so I'm excited to like talk through kind of
all of it. And I will start with, you know,
kind of what came from the grief and being a
survivor and seeing all the things. Was really realizing that
grief never stops for us humans, as black women, as
sexual assault survivors, as trauma survivors, and I kind of
(16:06):
wanted to speak to that, especially coming from a survivor's lens,
because again, we're always surviving something unfortunately. And so I
started speaking to grief in that survivorship and how do
we exist in both sides of it while it's constantly happening.
So I created a class grief for survivors. It's online,
there's a sliding scale, the links are in all the
(16:28):
things I have, and it's on my Instagram and I'm
super excited to do it. This is the third time
I'm doing this class. This is also newly freshly back teaching.
I have not been teaching for a while, and I
came back in thinking, do I still know how to
do this? Can I can? I have these conversations and
(16:50):
all the things, and as soon as I open my mouth,
I was like, girl, that was so cute. You got this.
It just felt like riding the bike, which was hard
for me to learn. Let's keep let's be always.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
Right and truthful about it.
Speaker 3 (17:01):
It is not an easy process. Easy, y'all. Stop.
Speaker 2 (17:04):
But the return is what we focus on. The return.
Speaker 3 (17:07):
The return, Yes, And so I'm excited to be doing
grief as a survivor, and you know, that has been
a beautiful process. I am working on developing new classes.
I am refreshing classes. I am working on refreshing my workbook,
and all of that is coming. And everything that I
(17:28):
do is, you know, has a sliding scale adaptability. I
started doing one to one work again as of April
twenty twenty five. I open my books back. It is
very different than I've ever done it before. Now I
allow clients to have full autonomy. I give them here's
my calendar, it's the schedule. Is attached to my calendar.
(17:49):
If it is open, you can book it. And for
those that are of the global majority and professional wrestlers,
I do offer a fifty percent off discount for sixty
minute and ninety minute sessions. I offer a free twenty
five minute alignment call because I think it's important. You
should audition your the people you're working with. You should
get in their business. You should ask those questions because
(18:10):
they are going to be working and supporting you. And
so I have that setup now, which has been really fun.
I've had such amazing clients and talking about sex after
trauma has been so big and like helping these individuals
get back into their bodies. And I do it very differently,
probably than other people. I make people have self dates
(18:31):
and people go, I don't want to it. I'm like,
you thought it was going to be like a one
step No, there's like five steps and you are navigating.
I'll tell you just for people want to know. So
the first step is you know, feeding yourself. We don't
we internally like getting into your body. You cook something,
you go buy something, whatever, and then there's body movement,
(18:51):
dance in the kitchen, do yoga, go for a walk,
I don't care. And of course this is quick snaps.
After that, there is a cleansing, shower, a bath, and
it's not just like oh, I'm gonna take a shower. No, no, no,
you better slow it down and be intentional. Get out
that good bathwash, get out those good sprays, do that scrub.
It's a whole process. And then from there we start
(19:13):
getting into the bedroom. We talk about positions or we
talk about touch, and it depends on the client and
who I'm working with, what order we do it in.
And it's not the way people think, like touch is
really slow. I want you to figure out where you
want to be touched, where you don't want to be touched,
the pressure, the style, the time. People don't think about that.
(19:36):
Positions right, like sexual assault, You are in some type
of position. Are you still you've been trying to do
that position? Haven't been triggered? Oh no, I didn't think
about that. Like navigating, how do we upgrade, how do
we downgrade? How do we use that language? And then
eventually we get into touching ourselves. Is it a toy?
Is it a thing? We figure out your erotic blueprint,
(19:57):
what do you need to exist? And that's just the
started it. So that's something else I'm doing. My intimacy
coordinator training company Cinema. We're doing our first film festival,
which applications August fifteen, get them in three minutes of
intimacy and or if you have like a long film
(20:19):
and you have three minutes, three minutes is the key here.
You tell us the time spots, we can get it
in for you August fifteenth. It's coming quick. We do
have a late deadline in September. Go follow Cinema find
out more. And the film festival is focused around intimacy,
so many different styles. We're so excited. We've gotten some
really fun and wild things and I was like, Okay,
(20:40):
I've never this is crazy, and that's exciting. And tending
the garden, my baby, my baby. I've really been wanting
to have a community space and I think that that
is so important for survivors, and so last month we
launched our online community space for survivors, and so each
(21:03):
area represents our pillars, and I added a bonus pillar,
our sex positive space, just because that is the support
groups I've been doing for the past seven years. And
so I've kind of just merged everything in one home,
and there's three different options. You want to get the
paid option and let me tell you why. There's a
free option that you can go check it out. You
will always get resources resources you never have to that
(21:26):
is forever, and you also get journal prompts every day.
You sign up for twenty dollars nineteen ninety five a month,
you get to choose which community space you want to
be in. You get to be able to attend me
support groups, which will be twice a month. That is
a twenty nineteen ninety five space. There is a twenty
nine to ninety five space there. For that you get
(21:48):
an upgrade and a discount to classes that are outside
of the space. In the nineteen ninety five space, there's
classes that live there. You get the recordings, but if
you want to pay a little bit more, you get
discounts the classes. You get discounts to online and in
person events. And so you spend a lot of money
doing nonsense, spend a lot little money on yourself. Come
(22:09):
find some community. You know it is moderated and reminder
of the spaces. There is a cisgendered male space, there
is a trans and non a binary space. There's a
sex worker space, a college age eighteen to twenty five.
There's a disabled space, and in these spaces, I feel
like I'm missing someone. Women of color, excuse me. And
in these spaces, when you sign up, you get to
(22:31):
choose who am I like. I want you to self identify,
So if you are a sex worker and a woman
of color, you get to be in those spaces. They're
not for cismen, they're not for trans and non binary
folks unless you're in you check those boxes. We want
this community to be yours. We want you to be
in those spaces with people so you could have those
conversations and lean on each other. It's very new. We
(22:54):
had about twenty y'all in there so far, but you
have to do the upgrade to get all of the things.
Nineteen ninety five a month and I think, last but
not least, in the update, before you really ask me questions,
I applied for a PhD program. I just thought, doctor Jiminique,
I would look, you don't me real cute, real cute,
(23:15):
and so I am excited. Research isn't necessarily my jam.
But then I realized I've been researching my whole life.
Speaker 1 (23:24):
I was about to say I was about that. I
was about to read Future Doctor Dominica, because yes, you
have been doing the Yes, you've been doing the work,
the research work.
Speaker 3 (23:35):
Yes, she's been outside and I mean, if anything, she's inquisitive,
so she'd been researching in her own world. So I
am excited for those interviews and future goals as well.
But besides that, she's happy. She's helping you. Just finish
a thirty day yoga challenge, about to do another one,
And I think those are the things just staying sane
(23:57):
for you to have questions. But like, it's been a
long road.
Speaker 1 (24:03):
Yeah, I can only imagine because I'm just thinking about
where both of us. I feel like both of us.
I listen back to our interview from two years ago,
and I just I hear how much we were going
through at the time, And so you know, to come
back and have a chance to have you just tell
(24:24):
us about what is going on in your life and
see the glow and hear the passion and hear the excitement.
It is so necessary just from a community standpoint, all
of the work that you're doing and is so necessary
for the continued growth of the movement and where folks
are at right now for this work to exist, So
(24:45):
thank you for running it back for some programs and
you know, building it for others. But also it just
it sounds like what I'm hearing from you is joy
in the work, and I'm so glad to be able
to hear that in how you're describing it, because it
(25:07):
is very difficult to get to joy through grief. But
I'm so I feel honored to be able to hear
that and witness that through you and from you, because
I know and I can recall where you came from.
So I'm just on a human standpoint, glad to see
where you are now and grateful for all the work
(25:30):
that you're doing.
Speaker 3 (25:32):
It's true, you know, when we are constantly grieving, and
I think as a country right now there is a
collective grief because we didn't think this was me really back.
We had hoped that this was not where we were
going to be because I didn't vote for this, That's
(25:53):
not what I have voted for, and now we are
collectively grieving. Black women are the highest unemployed individuals in
this country right now, and we are also the most
degree carrying and suddenly the most gun carrying because people
are always on our necks and the grief of what
(26:16):
we should be doing right now, what we have to
be doing, and what we think is coming. That shit
is heavy because people constantly go, well, what about the
black ladies? What are they doing? Girl? You don't leave
me alone. I'm getting a snack.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
Okay, we're focusing on ourselves, but we.
Speaker 3 (26:37):
Haven't been allowed and still aren't really, but grief doesn't stop.
And I think again, shout out to Betty my therapist.
Hey girl, the constant reminder and support, and you know,
it's so much easier to do this with my clients.
But like the reminder of you have to work with it, right,
(26:59):
like sexual assault, it's not going anywhere. You have to
go through it and navigate through it. She kept being like,
I don't know. I feel like you try to skip
over things. That's what you get for you get a
black lady therapist. I think I need to call. I'm
gonna text her after this actually get a session. But
she was like, you have to go through the thing.
(27:20):
I don't think you're doing it. I feel like you're
avoiding it. And then I did my own ten day
silent retreat last year, my third, my first personal without
going to a retreat center. And then there was a
wedding for one of my close friends in February in Maui.
She's like family, like one of my cousins. And I
(27:41):
went to Maui and the way I help water Maui,
because the way I cried all over that island and
meditated and prayed and walked labyrinths and let the sun
bless me, and to come back and go okay, I
like I felt like, and I felt like felt like
(28:05):
to the ground. I left a lot of that there.
I got to release it, and I came back knowing
I had sixty days left on my wrestling contracts. They
gave us sixty days because of mental health. Knowing that
I didn't know what was next, and it was scary
and nervous, but I had to go through it. And
the reminder of you've done so much and survived so much,
(28:27):
so that is also the reminder for all of us,
this is not the worst day we've ever navigated. This
is not the worst season. It's shitty, it's shitty outside,
let's be real, Yeah, but we have the tools in
the community within us if we allow them to show
up and support us. That is what I learned in
the last two years is if you allow these people
(28:48):
that are like I'm here to actually show that they're here,
it will change your life and it will help save you.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
I just want people to sit on that for a time.
That's beautiful. That's a beautiful sentiment, and I appreciate you
sharing that. I did want to ask you a quick question.
You had mentioned in your one on one work that
(29:22):
you allow your clients and the folks that you're working
with to ask questions of you, And that's sort of
built into your practice with them and your It sounds
like in your intake with them, ask questions of like
what the expectations are, check in with you, be very
transparent on your end about like what they will get
(29:44):
from you and how that collaborative process will work. So
for people who are like looking for someone who does
what you're doing and who maybe you know, need to
see that in person, so can't work or don't want
to work with you one on one, what are those
like some of those questions that you think people should
be asking to get at, like is this person like
(30:04):
the right person for me? Are they going to, like
you know, understand who I am?
Speaker 3 (30:10):
Yeah? Absolutely, ask what they've studied. Right, Like, I am
not a licensed therapist by choice, right. I chose to
navigate this, And I think that's also a good reminder.
I am not a licensed therapist by choice because of
the people that I work with. Because I know, if
I need to go make a ride to help save you,
I'm not reporting that to nobody. We're gonna move, We're
(30:31):
gonna get your really need to go. That was a choice. Now,
the amount of student dead I have, let me tell you,
she's got degrees, and so again that is a choice.
I've been studying psychology since I was sixteen. I've studied
merit and family therapy. I've studied hell psychology, I've studied
alternative medicine. I you know, there's all of these things
(30:52):
that I have a background it that I haven't even named.
Ask people what are they practice it? And you can
also ask like how do you work with survivors? Pay
attention to how they respond to you when you are
sharing your information, if you're sharing a bit of your story,
if you are sharing your background, pay attention to how
(31:15):
they respond. I remember the first therapist that I went to.
It was a small Asian woman and I was sharing
about my mother's murder and my sexual assault. And she
sat there and this lady literally grasped her pearls and said,
oh my god, I said, girl, will never see you again.
That's wild. I didn't even tell you nothing yet. So
pay attention to that. You know, ask what their clientele
(31:39):
looks like. Who's their demographic, right, I have a lot
of women of color, and that makes sense to me.
In the beginning, I had a lot more white women,
and I think as I have evolved and gotten more
comfortable in my skin, there's also other women of color
that go, yeah, I'm gonna need that, you know. Asking
(32:01):
how they speak to their clients, I think is also important.
I don't sugarcoat it. I am not one of those
people that's like a fluffy person. I am direct, I
am honest. I will never harm you. I will hold
you in space, but I will also hold you accountable.
And so if you don't want to be pushed out
of your comfort zone, not an aggressive way, but like
(32:23):
you have to move past that to grow. If that's
not what you're looking for, I'm not your girl.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (32:28):
I think those are really good questions, and you know,
asking how their sessions work, right, like, that's also really important.
I explain in the beginning what an alignment call looks
like and why we're here, and it's so you can
get a vibe on me and so I can get
a vibe on you. Because at the end of who
I go all, if we're not good together or I
don't have those skills to support you, you know, go
(32:50):
research who you're working with. Use Google. She's free, she's
your friend, look me up. I would tell people after
this alignment call, if you you know, if you have
other questions me, if you have other thoughts, get in
my business, go through my social media, and for some people,
ask them what their political views are. That might be
(33:10):
very important to you. People like that shouldn't matter. I
think it does, and if you also think it does,
ask those questions right, and then ask what does working
with you look like? Again, I'm going to emphasize that
what does a first session look like with me? A
first session is kind of like a download. You share
with me what you want me to share. You share
with me your goals. We'll have a little bit of
(33:31):
that in the beginning, but like in the alignment call,
but like really we'll get into it. Let's figure out
what you want. And also there's a reminder of like healing,
the way we navigate it will not be linear. It
is going to be up and down. One day you're
going to walk in and be like, here's the thing.
And Also I take notes during sessions. No one would
understand them. Sometimes I'll understand why I go and look
(33:51):
it's crazy, but I take notes after every session. I
want you to be focused. I want you to show up. Also,
I give homework because I don't believe that healing and
navigating healing is really done in thirty minutes and sixty
minutes and ninety minutes. It's ongoing. How do we continue
building these tools if we're just like, all right, girl'll
(34:12):
see you in two week, sixty minutes again. No, right,
And if you're not willing to commit and go through
the things, I am not for you. I am a
trauma companion. I am not a trauma leader. And in
a companion, I'm here to support you when we are
sharing back and forth. But we have to do the
equal work. Yeah, and so it's active, it's active, it's overgrowing.
(34:37):
And I curse in session and I'm going to be
like that is shitty. No, when you are trying to
lightly walk around and tap foot around your abuser. Absolutely not.
We will be calling them in and holding them accountable
in that session because this might be the only space
you get to do that. We don't just well and
(34:58):
he no, no you, he harmed you. That woman harmed you,
that person harmed you, and that is not okay, And
that was shitty the way people responded. If your therapist
or your mental health provider is not going that hard
for you, I'm just saying, question them, just question them.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
Yeah, because that is a certain ethic that they're showing
up with and that is not That is not what
is going to facilitate everyone's healing. And some people need
a little bit more direct, Some people need a little
bit more straight to the point, like no, no bullshit.
Speaker 3 (35:36):
And people mean coddling. It's just not me, but I
know people that do it. And I will also recommend
and give you resources to other people, and that's okay.
Speaker 2 (35:46):
I'm not mad.
Speaker 3 (35:47):
I want you to get whatever you need.
Speaker 1 (35:49):
This is such an important I think toolkit and offering
of a tool that you're giving people right now, because
we don't hear that we hear.
Speaker 3 (35:58):
Oh, have you.
Speaker 1 (35:59):
Considered there have you considered, you know, talking to someone
that's always the go to, but it's rarely met with
or paired with an intentionality behind how you navigate trying
to see who's the right fit, and so many of
us kind of enter that space and are re traumatized.
I have a similar story of a woman that I
went to for the first time in a mental health
(36:22):
space and it was just so clearly the wrong fit
and she had diagnosed me within two minutes of me
talking about what my experience was, and that's just you know,
that is not right for most of us. So we
like there was a level of discernment, yeah, that that
we need to have in navigating that so that we
can get what we need.
Speaker 2 (36:41):
Out of it.
Speaker 1 (36:41):
Because truthfully, at the end of the day, it is
about you and what you're you know, what you are
getting out of it, and how it helps you or
does not help you.
Speaker 3 (36:51):
Absolutely. So another thing about the community space is I
like a trial, you know, you sometimes you got to
feel off the water and within the community space. If
you want to see what the higher space looks like,
in the higher price space, the nineteen ninety five or
the twenty nine ninety five space, you can sign up
(37:11):
for that. You get seventy two hours to kind of
walk around, poke around, get in the business, look how
it's structured, and then you will be prompted to enter
card information. And so if you decide to not put
your card information in no worries, you just will stay
on the free tier, which you will still have access
to resources and you will still have access to like
(37:32):
journal prompts. So that is always something that is free
for folks forever in navigating. But you do go, try
it out, poke yourself around. What you won't see is
the support groups. And the reason you won't see the
support groups is we need to have enough people that
are signed up in those spaces. What does that mean?
What does enough people look like? I need at least
(37:53):
four people four just for I need at least four
people in each pillar to be able to hold and
host these support groups because two people that's not a group.
Three people, eh, four people, it feels more supportive. As
someone that's been doing this for seven plus years, I
figured it out. I've done again the research look at me,
(38:17):
and you know it allows for more connection getting in
those message boards, start building that community, because as of
right now, we have this beautiful community that hasn't been
fully access to its full potential yet. So come join us.
We're here waiting on you.
Speaker 1 (38:32):
A question, is there somebody is there, like a right
person to join the community, like you know, is there
is there a right person versus a person where it's like, okay,
maybe this isn't the space for you.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
I don't know if that's if you.
Speaker 3 (38:49):
Are a sexual assault survivor this is the space for you, right,
And so I believe that when we first started tending
the Garden, I had a pushback from white women, right
because originally attending the Garden was for women of color
and it was supposed to just be retreats. Pandemic happened,
as we all remember, things changed and I realized when
(39:13):
I really was able to pull back that there were
so many other communities that had also been marginalized. And
so cis gendered. Men, If you are a man and
cis gendered, that's for you. It doesn't matter age, race, whatever,
eighteen and up. Sure if you are a woman of color,
now it was you know, of course I was like
black women, yes, but also women of color in general.
(39:36):
You're good to go. If you are a sex worker
of any level of sex work. We know that no
means no in any capacity, even if it's your job,
then that fits for you. If you are disabled any
type of disability, who are we and we're not gatekeepers?
Are what that looks like? Trans and non binary folks, Yes,
it is one space because I understand that there is
(39:56):
crossover and also there is it so you know, if
you want to have different co versas and things you
do it. You know, the college age folks, it is
a different conversation for some folks because you are actively
in school while these other folks might not be. That's
a different lived experience, right, And so we wanted to
make sure that people just felt seen and not necessarily
(40:21):
continue to be like, oh, well, I'm not disabled enough,
or I'm not this kind of sex worker, like am
I a woman of color? And like yes, the answer
is yes. And so if you are a sexual assault
survivor and you identify as a survivor or a victim
or whatever language you want, if you have been harmed
by a sexual act, a devian acts, someone's put their
(40:42):
hands on you, their genitals on you, in you, any
of that type of activity, the space is for you beautiful.
Speaker 1 (40:49):
And I think that's such a helpful thing for folks
to hear is don't self exclude, you know, test it out. Yeah,
and I'm so glad that you have that opportunity, that
window for people to test it out, dip atoe it,
see if it's the right space, and then you know,
you can lean in a little bit further if it
feels right and comfortable, which hopefully you do in that regard.
(41:10):
But don't let yourself talk yourself out of an opportunity
to find some community, because we can't get through this
alone and we can't heal alone.
Speaker 3 (41:18):
Absolutely, you could also, you know, on the back end,
we need your info. But if you want to go
by a different name, you can right, like whatever type
of safety you need in this like, you definitely can.
You can communicate with each other, right you can block
people because I think autonomy is also really important. That's
why we have it in the beginning. You choose what
(41:40):
level of support you want. You get to choose which
communities and we will look at the background. So we
put you fill out the form. We physically put you
in there so we will check and see and look again.
We research it. We want to make sure that you
are not just trying to get into a space and
cause harm. And if someone does get in, because people
get into communities all the time, quickly, I have someone
(42:01):
that monitors. And I also want to note that Tending
the Garden is created by survivors and ran by survivors.
When we have the support groups, survivors predominantly run them,
and or we have therapists interns that are also going
to be running these groups. The support groups are all digital.
You can be in your bed, type in and everything
(42:23):
in those support goots. It gets fed through and we
make sure that it is safe for you. We're not
just letting anybody say anything all willy nilly. And the
reason I wanted that as well, you get to have
your identity, you get to type, you don't have to
show your face. You get to customize this experience to
a way that still allows you to feel somewhat safe
(42:44):
and in control. And I think that again was really important.
As we were building it. It took me a while
to be like, Okay, finally, finally do it, Like it's
been ready for a few months, and I was like, fine, okay,
just do it. Oh and it's been really good I'm
just continuously trying to get the word out. I think
it is something that people need and do want, they
just don't know about it yet.
Speaker 2 (43:04):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (43:05):
Absolutely, And I'm glad you mentioned that it's virtual, because
I'd had that question before and completely forgot to come
back to it.
Speaker 2 (43:13):
Out of the.
Speaker 1 (43:15):
Upcoming opportunities that you told us about, how many of
them are any of them virtual?
Speaker 2 (43:19):
So you talked about the.
Speaker 1 (43:21):
Talk back, the film festival, your one on one work,
and your grief first survivors classes are any of those
virtuals so that anyone.
Speaker 2 (43:31):
Can access them from anywhere.
Speaker 3 (43:32):
Absolutely one to one stuff is only virtual, and that
was also important to me. Is one I like to
be in my own house?
Speaker 2 (43:42):
Oh yes, same, but.
Speaker 3 (43:44):
Also because I wanted folks to be able to access
me wherever they needed to access, and so that is
all virtual. The wonder One stuff is virtual, the support groups,
the whole community is virtual unless we do have outside events.
The August twelfth class, the Grief is a survivor. It
is through Shebop, the sex toy store that is in Portland,
(44:08):
but it is virtual and there is flighting scales for
tickets and all the things. My classes that are online.
Those are virtual, so I'm working on redoing things so
you if you still want them, they're up there. And
there's also when you go to my website, there's already
a discount coke there, and you don't have to be like, oh,
jim no, no, it's already there. If you need it,
use it, we put it there. If you're like, no,
(44:30):
I don't want it, I don't need it, cool, but
we give it to you upfront so you don't also
have to feel like asking, because you know it's hard
for people asking for help, and so if I put
it up front, they can go, oh, I get to
make this choice. A lot of the things in the
ways that I navigate also is about autonomy because when
we are survivors, especially if sexual assault, we didn't opt
(44:51):
into that. That was taken from us. So I'm slowly
I'm tricking o'll, I'm slowly building that autonomy back up
a little by little.
Speaker 1 (45:00):
So I just want to thank you for all of
this incredible stuff that you're doing right now. And I
want to say, Jimini Ka, thank you so much for
coming back and returning and you know, giving us this update,
because you're doing some really incredible stuff right now. It's
so timely, it's so necessary, it's so needed, and I
(45:20):
just thank you for bringing it back and giving us
all an update and a little glimpse into what you
what you're up to these days.
Speaker 3 (45:28):
Thank you for asking for the update, because life, life's
to lose time. It sure is ongoing. But yes, thank
you for having me back and getting that update anytime.
Speaker 2 (45:40):
Thank you. We'll talk soon, all right, y'all.
Speaker 1 (45:45):
I hope you enjoyed that catchup combo as much as
I did. I want to hear how you all are
tending to your own gardens, what fills you up? How
are you actively pouring into your mind, body, and spirit
these days. Check in with us on Instagram at the end,
on sorority, and on TikTok. You can also write in
an email if you have any questions or comments that
(46:06):
you would like to see addressed on the show, or
if you want to let us know what's going on
with you and answer this question in a voice note.
I can't wait to hear from you, and until next time,
take care of yourself, take care of one another, and
release whatever shame or gilt you may be feeling about
the harm that's been done to you. You are not
alone and I literally cannot even begin to tell you
(46:28):
how excited I am for next week's roll call guests.
So make sure you are subscribed to the show on
your favorite podcast platform so you don't miss it.
Speaker 2 (46:36):
And while you're at.
Speaker 1 (46:38):
It, please rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts.
It really helps the show grow, so I would sincerely
appreciate you taking the time to do so, and don't
forget to stay safe, stay connected, and remember this is
a safe space, not a quiet space.
Speaker 2 (46:53):
I'll see you all next time.
Speaker 1 (47:05):
The Unwanted Sorority is hosted in executive producer Beymy Leandro Tate,
Our executive producer is Joel Money, our producer is Carmen Loren,
and original cover art is created by Savannah Euler. I
would also like to be a special thanks to the
iHeart Podcast Next Up program for helping bring the show
to life. Also all of the guests who have taken
the step in sharing their story with you all on
these episodes. And finally, to all the members of the
(47:28):
Sorority who will never tell their story, we see you
and your story matters.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
Cardiac Cowboys
The heart was always off-limits to surgeons. Cutting into it spelled instant death for the patient. That is, until a ragtag group of doctors scattered across the Midwest and Texas decided to throw out the rule book. Working in makeshift laboratories and home garages, using medical devices made from scavenged machine parts and beer tubes, these men and women invented the field of open heart surgery. Odds are, someone you know is alive because of them. So why has history left them behind? Presented by Chris Pine, CARDIAC COWBOYS tells the gripping true story behind the birth of heart surgery, and the young, Greatest Generation doctors who made it happen. For years, they competed and feuded, racing to be the first, the best, and the most prolific. Some appeared on the cover of Time Magazine, operated on kings and advised presidents. Others ended up disgraced, penniless, and convicted of felonies. Together, they ignited a revolution in medicine, and changed the world.