November 19, 2025 • 42 mins
This week on The Upload, Brooke Taylor and Pastor Mark Evans sit down with Nashville-based fashion, travel, and wellness influencer—and host of The Tuesday Tea—Maddie Perry for a deeply moving conversation about loss, calling, and unshakeable faith.
At just 20 years old, Maddie walked through unimaginable heartbreak when her long-term boyfriend suddenly passed away. In the midst of grief, she experienced a peace she can’t explain—and a moment in her kitchen where she heard the unmistakable voice of God say she would see him again and that He would redeem what had been lost. That encounter became the foundation of her faith and the beginning of her own redemption story.
Maddie opens up about navigating life as an influencer in a world that praises the polished and filtered—while she feels convicted to be more bold, transparent, and outspoken about her faith. She shares honest insights on comparison, the pressure of social media, and the mindset shifts that are helping her stay grounded. Plus, she talks about why she feels called in this season to memorize Scripture and anchor herself to truth.
Authentic, emotional, and full of hope—this conversation is for anyone walking through grief, questioning purpose, or learning how to live out their faith in front of others.
🎧 Listen in and be encouraged by Maddie’s powerful testimony of loss, peace, and God’s redemption.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi, I'm Matty Perry.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
I have lost everything that matters to me really, and
it was kind of like rock Bottom. I've heard God
like save me. He's with me and you'll see him again.
God is real, Like I know I heard him.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
I felt him.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
Everything that God's called you to do in sharing, have
you wrestled with that?
Speaker 2 (00:17):
God gave me this platform and the world is going
to condemn me no matter what. There's kind of a
spark I think all around with Christians wanting to be
more bold in their faith.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
And this is the upload.
Speaker 4 (00:30):
Matty Perry joining us on the upload today. We're so
excited to chat with you about your journey and I
know some of your story, but I feel like a
lot of people know you mostly from just your online
presence and sort of sharing most of your life online.
But I feel like people define you as the quote
unquote influencer, right, Like that's the content creation, like the
(00:51):
influencer part of life. But I'm curious how you define
the word faith.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
Yeah, well, thank you guys so much for having me.
It's so excited to be here. That's like great question.
I think faith can be defined in a lot of ways.
I would say, for me, it's kind of like the
all in dedication and belief that God is sovereign, that
God rules, and that God is trustworthy and good in
your life. I think as a believer, I think it's
(01:18):
easy to kind of say those things and not really
believe them.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
You know, you can.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Say that you believe God's word is true, but as
soon as you lose the job, or lose the relationship
or finances are tough, it's like you kind of just
give into fear and all of that, and to really
believe and know that God is true and all that
requires so much faith. So that's I would think that's
how I define it.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
Yeah, And I feel like sometimes in life the word
faith can mean different things, right, depending on the season
that you're in or what you're going through. Can you
go back to a part where you know something happened
in your life where you could tangibly feel like faith
is real, this is something that I believe in and
I can feel it.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Yeah, I would say the biggest thing that's happened in
my life that a test of my faith is a
huge part of my testimony. Actually, I dated someone for
about four and a half years who passed away very
unexpectedly when I was let's see how it was. I
think I was twenty one, so.
Speaker 1 (02:12):
It was a while ago, but that was a huge
turning point in my life for faith.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
I think I kind of got to the point where
I was like, I've lost everything that matters to me really,
and it was kind of like rock bottom. But looking
back now, it was such a beautiful thing in my
life because I'd believed and got up to that point,
and I had gone to church and I'd done all
the things to be like morally a Christian, but I
hadn't really had a personal, deep intimate relationship with God
(02:39):
up until that point. And I think that was kind
of like a turning point in my just journey with
Him because like I said, it was a point where
I felt like I'd lost everything and I had felt
I was like, I can't really describe it other than
like the blanket of peace that people talk about, which
I'd heard that before.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
And I'd never felt before.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
And it was literally like a blanket like covering me
and like just supernatural experience of God being near to
the broken hearted, and that really defined my walk with
Him and yeah, really led me just on this trajectory
of pursuing Him with everything that I am, because I
was kind of like one fit in, one fit out,
you know, keeping certain things to myself and not handing
them over to God. And at that point, I was like,
(03:18):
literally nothing else matters other than how I love people
and how I love God. And it's never been more
clear to me. And God is so real, and he's
so present and close to those who need him and
those who ask and seek for him, and so yeah,
that would that's like the biggest.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
Part of my life. I would say that.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
I think that I really kind of had to have
faith because it was like either.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Have it or you don't.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
You know, like when those things happen, it's like it
either throws you more into a relationship with God or
it kind of turns you away totally. And that for me,
I'm so grateful that that was a moment where God
really sought after me and allowed me to seek after
him as well.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
Yeah. God is such a personal god, and I think
the matter of faith is such a personal topic and
many many people have conversations with It's always, it seems
to be always those defining moments of pain, some of
those real trials where it's like, Okay, what do I
really believe? And it's interesting you use the word that
(04:18):
trial of having someone so close to you pass away
was a gift. That definition, you know, as not just
a something that you're mad at God and wrestling with still,
but it's like, what was the process in you for
that becoming a place of healing and a still a scar,
(04:39):
still very real pain, but a defining moment where you
can look back and go that was a gift. That
journey was a gift. That's a big state.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
I think there's a verse that I'm going to butcher it,
but it's like blessed or the broken hearted, for they
receive the comfort of God or something along those lines.
Or the closeness of God is so true because it's like,
you know, you think of life and you think of
these trials, and it's like, I don't want that to
happen to me, Like I don't want to lose someone
close to me. I don't want to go through that
this or that because of how horrible it is. And
(05:07):
that's true, but also on the other hand, just that
closeness of God is so real and it's something that
I have never experienced other than those times. Of discomfort
and heartache and loss, and so it's like inexplainable just
how what the enemy wants to use for evil, God
plans for good and it's just so clear, and it's
(05:30):
a blessing to be able to experience that, Like not
everyone in life will go through hard things, right, but
to have experienced that at such a young age has
pros and cons. But the pro is far outwagh the cons.
Looking back now, it's hard to see when you're in it.
When you're in it, you're just like, day by day,
how can I.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
Get through this? And what can I do? And God
just sustained me.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
But now looking back it's been about eight and a
half years since that happened, and just being able to
see God move in my life and transform me through that,
and it's like, I'm never going to say that I'm
glad that that happened, because you know, I'm not glad
that He's not on this earth anymore, but I can
be so thankful in God's goodness and how He's used
(06:13):
it for his glory.
Speaker 4 (06:15):
I want to go back to where you describe kind
of the blanket of peace and the feeling behind that,
because I think for somebody who's listening who might not
be a believer or doesn't really understand religion or a
relationship with the Lord. Describe what you are feeling in
those moments like leading up to finding that blanket of peace,
and just the radical like transition of those feelings, because
(06:36):
I feel like tangibly you probably just like felt, you know,
a piece of your heart just kind of feel warm almost,
you know.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Yeah, right.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
And so this happened the day after I found out
that he passed, and I was just sitting in my
kitchen and I was just like I that person was
someone that kind of like fell like home, you know,
and then it was like, Okay, now they're gone, and
it just was thisiness that I was feeling, and I
was just sitting there like kind of grappling with that,
and yeah, I just felt this overwhelming piece just come
(07:08):
over me. And I felt like I've heard God like
say to me, He's with me and you'll see him again.
And I never really felt like I heard the voice
of God before, and it was just undeniable. It was
like that was God that just spoke to me, and
it was just this comfort and a time where like
looking at it from a worldly perspective. I should have
never have felt comfort in that it was just all
(07:29):
heartache and loss, But you see it time and time again,
like this is a testimony that so many people have
that go through loss. It's like, if everyone's saying the
same thing is happening to them, that they feel this
comfort of God in these moments of complete darkness, how
can it not be real?
Speaker 1 (07:45):
You know?
Speaker 2 (07:45):
And like I said earlier, like in order to feel that,
you have to go through these hard things. So it's
and I'm not saying that God only works in hard times,
because he can work whenever he wants and you don't
have to go through something like that, but a benefit
of that is that God will work and he will
use it for good. And so I think there's power
in that testimony and the you know, there's the fact
(08:08):
that when believers go through these things, everyone has similar
instances of God giving them that peace when they shouldn't
have in peace, and God just speaking to them and
sustaining them in that time.
Speaker 4 (08:18):
Yeah, do you feel like when you heard the Lord
say that, did that kind of like open you up
to hearing his voice more often and like knowing him
and knowing when he's saying something.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Yeah, definitely. I think it just kind of sparked this
relationship with me and the Holy Spirit that I hadn't
had before, and it just kind of opened that door.
And I think I had up until that point, like
I said, not really had that personal relationship with God.
And at that point I was like, Okay, God is real,
Like I know, I heard him, I felt him in
a way I never had before. So that kind of
(08:50):
like how we were defining faith, like the just full
belief and trust that God is good and sovereign, and
I had that then and when I didn't have that before,
and so yeah, it just kind of gave me that
new perspective and that new faith and just kind of
I didn't have, I didn't doubt the way that I
did before.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
I think that's when it becomes real to you, like
you're saying, like it goes from being this idea or
this belief system to this really personal conviction. That process
is different for everyone, but I think even in my
own life, the catalyst often is just things that I
can't understand, you know, like things that doesn't make sense.
(09:28):
I can't there's no formula to add it up. It's
the piece that goes beyond all understanding, and when you
this is true even though it doesn't make sense or
I can't. There's no formula to you know, reason, there's
no you know. And so I think to me, that
evidence in the loss, in the pain that I can't deny.
(09:49):
It's not something someone told me, and I believe it's
like something that I know deep in me that can't
be taken away. Can't be convinced. I can't be out convinced.
Is that a word convinced? I can't be convinced. I
can't be convinced out of it, you know. And so
for me, it's it's so cool to hear that. And
I wonder just in having a platform, having a voice
(10:11):
and wrestling with I imagine, just like, what do you
say boldness, courage, outspoken, gently bringing it to people, knowing
that you know people have different perspectives, different backgrounds. How
have you found it in your voice, in everything that
God's called you to do, in sharing in boldness? In
(10:32):
what's the right level? Have you wrestled with that?
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Right?
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Yeah, that's funny that you bring that up, because I
feel like that is something that I've been dealing with recently,
I feel like I, you know, have been given this
platform and I share just kind of my life and
with that, like fashion, travel, whatever, and then I'll also
incorporate my faith in my testimony with devotionals I'm reading
how I'm feeling challenging the Lord when I'm learning in
small groups and things like that. But I have recently
(10:58):
felt a bit of a conviction to do that with
more boldness. And I think there's been a hesitancy before
of you know, it is my job, so I don't
want to make people feel uncomfortable and I don't want
to shove my faith down people's throats and things like that.
But then there's also this balance of like, God gave
me this platform, and you know, the world is going
(11:18):
to condemning no matter what, and so I just need
to go for it. And I think there's kind of
a spark I think all around with Christians all over
right now of wanting to be more bold in their
faith and just speak out. And so that's been something
that I've been challenging myself to do because it's like,
you know, I'm thirty years old and I look back
at my life like, Okay, what am I doing? Like,
(11:39):
how am I being a good and faithful servant for
the Lord? And I think that is something that I
want to be more bolden and without being a quote
unquote Christian influencer, where you know, that's all they do
is share their faith, but find a way to incorporate
it in my work in a way that really affects
people and transforms people. And it's not about, you know,
(12:01):
the outcome. God is pleased with the obedience in that,
and so just being obedient to this conviction that I'm
feeling and really going after that. So yeah, that's something
that I definitely have been feeling and excited. I'm excited
about it, and yeah, I'm excited to see what God
does to that.
Speaker 4 (12:18):
Well, we were just talking. You said something just I
don't know, it was like thirty minutes ago. You were
talking about how like I don't answer to anybody but God,
you know, and like we are taught in the world
where all these other opinions matter, and that you know,
you hear something from someone and it's a criticism and
you feel bad. You're like, Okay, well maybe I don't
want to I can't take that. But answering to that
(12:38):
and seeing the fruit that comes out of being obedient
to God. I think it is such a cool a
thing to tangibly watch you as a friend, like see
you posting things and just be even more authentic to
who you are, and it's just it's a beautiful thing.
And I think that hearing you say yes and watching
you say yes has been really cool to watch, especially
too with just like sharing your store and sharing more
(13:01):
of you know, a lot of the influencer life quote
unquote looks so pretty and so just perfect, right, and
it's just like we all have messy parts in our
life that the Internet might not want to see, but
other people are feeling those things right, and it's so
beautiful to see, you know, like somebody who might not
know that you're a Christian and they're like, oh, yeah,
(13:22):
I follow this girl Matty Perry. She's amazing, but then
to see her posts like oh I'm going through this
rough time too, Wow, I can relate even more to
that person. So going into that, I feel like, you know,
we all have these messy seasons in our life where
things just like get hard, and I know that you're
very open about like dating and things like that, you know,
losing a partner. Does that spill into dating life for you?
Speaker 1 (13:45):
Now?
Speaker 4 (13:45):
Is that something you think about where you're afraid to lose.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
Someone or that's a great question. I think no, but
also yes, because it's like, I know what it feels
like to lose someone super close, and I know that
that's bound to happen, and again, you know, it's just life.
Nobody lives forever, and so I think that's maybe in
the back of my mind, but I try not to
let that really take control of me, just because I've
(14:10):
really felt God say that he will redeem what happened
to me. And I just think that there have been
through a lot in relationships, like I went through that
and then I was also engaged before and I ended that,
and so there's just been a lot of trial there
and I just know that God is using it and
through sharing both of those experiences that have happened to me.
Is so many people have messaged me saying like, thank
(14:33):
you so much for sharing that that's had such an
impact on my life. And I just see God using it,
and so yeah, it is is definitely messy, like the
stories within that for sure, but yeah, I see God
using it and sharing that there's power in that testimony totally.
Speaker 3 (14:51):
People hungry for real, Like I think really like there's
more than i've I'm thirty seven almost, and in my
sh life, I've never experienced the hunger in society for real,
like the rawness, realness, honesty. Have been wrestling with that
because the truth for me is like I do care
(15:11):
about what people think, not necessarily out of a fear
of man way and the obvious ways, but the truth
is out of good intentions, Like you were saying, it's
my work and I want to navigate this and steward
at well. So I don't want to be polarizing and
I don't want to put anyone off. But at the
same time, like my question through this whole season has
been are the good intentions still withdrawing? Are there good intentions,
(15:36):
good reasons the things that I've justified still putting how
people perceive it or whether it's going to be an
effective strategy, Like that's a big thing for me. It's
like is this the most effective way to do it?
Versus is this true? And is it right? And is
God asking me to do it? And so that's the
thought is like God, I want to I want to
be obedient. I want to be surrendered. I want to
(15:57):
live where well done, good and faithful servant, not just
you know what, you are pretty smart. You could figure
out all the different pieces and your EQ was high
and man, you kind of like were able to take
in a lot of threads of information and and channel
that into the best outcome. Like I feel like I
wrestle if I'm honest, if I can you know, that's
the realness for me, is like I wrestle with own strength,
(16:21):
good intention, stuff and so what I love to hear
and I'm just seeing all across the world I can
feel it with you, and our conversations recently have just
been so like, you know what, at the end of
the day, I've got one accountability. It's to God in obedience.
And part of the gig of truth is yeah, I
(16:41):
don't like that. That's wrong. You're a that was in
a swear word necessarily, but it was like insert whatever
is that a wrestle for you?
Speaker 1 (16:52):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (16:52):
And I think to your point, there are always going
to be those people that are like, you're wrong. I
disagree with you for this then and the other, But
there are so many people that are hungering for that
raalness and so many people who love the Lord and
want to learn and so not that you're ever going
to be doing anything for the validation of people, but
it is encouraging when you do step out, and sure
(17:14):
there's going to be pushedback, there always will be. But
then there's other people that are like God spoke to
me through this, and that encouragement of like, Okay, this
is why God wants me to be doing these things.
He wants me to be speaking to these people and
touching these people in this way. And I think so
much of it is personal conviction and just being in
tune with your heart and staying rooted in scripture, in
(17:36):
God's word and having that personal relationship with Him to
keep you accountable, to keep your heart in the right
place of Okay, am I sharing this because I want
validation of these people or because I want to look
a certain way? Or on the other hand, am I
holding back because I'm scared of this and the other
Like I recently, I do a lot of things that
(17:57):
I don't share online because I've struggled with that, Like
I don't want to come across as I'm doing this,
so I have something to post I'm bragging about this
or whatever. And I really felt like God telling me
because when I'm scrolling and I see videos of people
going out and stepping out on their faith, I'm not thinking, Oh,
they're doing that for views. I'm thinking that's amazing. I
(18:18):
want to do something like that, not to post, but
just in life, Like I want to be someone who
goes out and does those things. And so I have
this platform. Why not share what I'm doing so that
I can be that for other people. And I just
really had to have a heart check, like, Okay, is
that why I'm doing it? Or am I doing it
for validation? And I was like, no, I feel like
the Lord's showing me this. And so, for example, a
(18:39):
video that I posted recently, like I something I do
is I like to have just like little homeless bags
in my car and then like hand them out to
people and I see them and pray for them, and
I put little bibles in there and foods and snacks
and whatever. And so I made a video of me
going out and putting those together and handing them out,
and I was really nervous about it because I was like,
I just don't want this to come across as a
certain way, and I just kind of had to.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
Let that go.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
And the response was amazing, Like so many people were
like this encouraged me to go do this and to
pray for people because I kind of talked about how
praying for people that I don't know is intimidating and
this is kind of a way to practice like exposure
therapy kind of like just do it for as many
people as he can SI get more comfortable. And so
I got a lot of people saying that God spoke
(19:23):
to them through that, and I just felt like, Okay,
this is what I want to use my platform for.
And sure there was a pushback in people, you know,
mean comments and whatever, but it's just like it is
what it is, you know, just listening to those convictions
and just you know, God knows your heart. So whatever
your heart is, if it's has good intentions or bad,
He's going to know no matter what the outcome is
(19:44):
with you know, with people around you. But and the feedback,
but just yeah, staying true to your heart and being
in tune with God's word and being rooted in that
and then stepping out in that He knows what your
intentions are.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
That's what the I think it's Hebrews that says, sharper
than a double edged sword, is the Bible dividing between
soul and spirit, judging the thoughts and intentions of the heart.
And I do think that's a daily thing. That's why
it's like, yeah, the Bible, it's a good idea to read,
but really it's actually the scalpel to like, I'm human.
Those thoughts come in my head all the time of
like am I doing this for this? And then I'm
(20:21):
double bluffing myself, trickle bluffing myself. But the Bible is
just like, no, this is actually what if you do
this for the least of these? In fact, Matthew twenty
five says, the shift or the binary between sheep and
goats that happens in the birthing pains at the end
times is it is about what you do for It
is about having bags in your car for those who
(20:42):
are struggling to find food. Like that's literally doing it
and encouraging others to do it. Amazing because that's the
difference between the ones that I'll say, world, I'm good
and faithful servant versus sorry, who are you? And that's
pretty serious. That's eternity kind of stuff, and how often
I've let, oh, how does.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
This look right?
Speaker 3 (21:02):
I might like, you know, I should just maybe I
shouldn't encourage, I shouldn't video this because people might think
da da dara. And that's exactly what I mean. Like,
that's a perfect example that video of the good intentions
that can rip us off, rob us from the influence right,
because I love and hate that influencer has become a thing,
(21:22):
because influence is absolutely the call. Light on a lampstand
so of the earth, that's the call. We used to
be called influencers church, funny enough, which was before it
was a thing. It was fifteen years ago, because we
started a political party because we believe that influence is
what God's called us to have. The Body of Christ
(21:43):
is called to speak and stand up, and the enemy
wants to say no, the church and state separate. So anyway,
I just want to validate the influencer status and say, yeah,
that's the calling. In fact, i'd argue, make disciples of
all nations, teaching them to obey my commands, baptizing the
name of the Father and Son, Holy Spirit. Truly, you
could argue that all of us have that assignment to influence. Yeah,
(22:05):
and so some people are better leaders than others. You
seem to be a better leader than me because you
have more followers. So I know, well, it is you know,
a leader by the by who's following. And so I
think that's not something that we are like a little
bit like, oh, you know, a little bit weird about.
But I just want to I guess you want to
smash that because I think that's can you say crap
on this podcast, But that's I just don't think. I think.
(22:27):
I think the enemy would love nothing to steal, kill
and destroyer, to create shame on rob and dim our light.
It shouldn't be put under a bowl. But anyway, all
that to say, that's my rant. There's no question here
other than that's my rant.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
Yeah, and I love that you brought up the verse
about the double edged sword. I was actually just talking
about that with a friend the other day because just
kind of looking at like, you know, the double edged sword,
it's so much more powerful, it's so much more deadly,
and you know, use it in battle for all of
these benefits, but then you also need to train so
much more with the double edged sword versus single age
and It's like, how true is that in our spiritual
(22:59):
life too? You know, we need to be training ourselves
behind closed doors. We need to be rooting ourselves in
the world and learning about what God says and just
who He is and not not reading scripture and you know,
applying it to who we think God is, but letting
it transform us because I think so often we kind
(23:21):
of have this idea of God that we make up
in our heads and we use scripture to kind of
fit that idea, and that idea is based usually loosely
on like worldly things. And to just be transformed by
God's word and who he is, even if it makes
us uncomfortable and really know that, and just be someone
who has an intimate relationship with Him behind closed doors
(23:41):
and that will translate in these other things like going
out and making disciples and using our influence and sharing
Him in the workplace and whatever that is. But it's
like it requires that training. You can't just go out
and do that without having that personal relationship and doing
the work on your own.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Yeah, to be equipped to do that totally.
Speaker 4 (24:00):
I love that you're bringing that up because me and
one of my best friends we were just recently talking
about this how you know, we read it devotional and
we you know, you check the box of your time
with the Lord every day and you do these things.
But like, I want to know this more, Like I
want to open up the Bible and I want to
know exactly where to turn to say no, this is
what God says, you know what I mean, and just
(24:20):
that yearning and that lean in where you're just like, no,
I want to know this more. I want to be
equipped with the words that the Lord says. And I
think that we're all kind of experiencing that right now
in the world in general. And it's just such a
cool thing to be a part of to see people
around us be like, yeah, me too, Okay, me too.
It's not just me, you too.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
Cool.
Speaker 4 (24:40):
It's like this crazy revival and it's just, I don't know,
it's really cool to be a part of.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
So let's talk about that. Let's talk about training with
the sword. Let's talk about I want to know you know,
as you're saying, I don't want to just do a
check with Giana, I should read the Bible. Let's understand
on a principal level, but like, what does it look
like for you both to train in the word God.
What does it look like to read it more than
just like, okay, yes, reaping and sewing. Yep, okay, you know,
(25:06):
do good unto other people? Great, got it, I'll try
and do that. But like, what does it look like
to apply says? It's alive and active, sharper than doubled
double edged sword. It's it's the word of God. Is
God breathed? Paul says to Timothy, It's God breathed? What
does that mean? That's that's more than There's hints here
all through the Bible of like, this thing isn't just
(25:27):
the best selling book of all time year after year
after year after year. Just doesn't it never gets knocked
off and never will. But what makes this different? And
how should we read it different?
Speaker 4 (25:37):
Right?
Speaker 3 (25:38):
That's the I think that's what I want to get too.
Speaker 2 (25:40):
So thoughts on that, Yeah, I mean, that's definitely something
that I've been wanting to do recently. It's been on
my heart, and I think that there are so many
layers to that because I think, you know, for me personally,
I've gone through waves of like, oh, listening to a
bunch of podcasts and sermons and all these things, but
not really diving into the word, Like how you're saying
you can be in the right mindset, but just avoiding
(26:01):
all like the one thing that you need to do,
which is really dive into scripture. And I think for me,
just having commentary pulled up that I can dive into,
taking it slow, like going verse by verse and really
memorizing scripture. That's a huge thing, because how you're saying,
like everyone's feeling this kind of conviction to learn more
so that we can go out and speak and have
(26:22):
these conversations. I think I've found myself recently just being honest,
wanting to have these conversations with non believers, but not
being able to pull up these verses and have these
biblical answers, and I just don't have those tools in
my belt, and I'm like, Okay, I need to memorize
the word, like I need to have these verses ready
to go and be able to answer these questions. And
(26:43):
so I've just really been trying to focus on that,
memorizing the scripture and just understanding it with that commentary,
and then pairing that obviously with preaching. I think it's
a pository preaching XBO, Yeah, yeah, that's you know, just
diving into the scripture verse by verse and really unpacking
(27:03):
that and being able to listen to preachers like that
and have them poorant to me.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
And then also in community and.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
Just having people keep yeah, having people keep you accountable
with memorizing scripture and like talking about what do we
think this means, having these debates, Like I'm literally going
to a PowerPoint night in a couple of weeks where
we're going to talk about like the big questions in
Christianity and what we think about and why and what
scripture says and just being able to learn from other
people and grow in that way, and you know, all
(27:33):
of that just builds up like the tool belt like
I'm talking about, and just having that ready to go
so that we can go and make disciples and hold
up our end of the bargain when defending the Bible
and just help bring people to God that way.
Speaker 4 (27:48):
Yeah, that intentional just yes, right, Like that's what it's
all about, is just the yes, Like yes, I want
to know more. And it's funny that you brought up
that was expository teaching. Yeah, because I was talking to
one of my friends the other day about like this
yearning in my heart of like wanting just to know more, right,
And he was just like, Okay, you're probably used to
topical teaching where it's like this is what happened yesterday
(28:09):
and it reminds me of this verse, and which is fine.
But he was just like, go to Matthew and spend
a whole month in Matthew and learn Matthew front to
back and just know every little detail about Matthew. And
it was just like then the next month jump over
to here, you know what I mean, And that just
really just you're in the word. You're not thinking about
how it applies to your life. You're just learning this
(28:29):
and I think it's so important, Like you said, to
equip your tool belt with the knowledge of the Word,
and that's I mean something that I'm going through too.
Speaker 3 (28:38):
It's yeah, and it's a live like who makes it
come alive? As I'm reading it, I'm like, okay, meaning
that it applies when I go through I lose someone
close to me. Like we're talking about how is that
real for me? You know, in that moment you're in
the kitchen, you hear the voice of the Holy Spirit.
You know, you feel that peace when you're reading the
(28:58):
Word of God. The Holy Spirit is the one that
makes it alive for me. And you know, I think
that's when I sit down and I don't do it
a lot. But it's like I don't do it a lot.
That was a little bit too real, I did. I
want to do it more. Okay, that's what I meant
to say. Let's just say that. But it's like I
really got to start with Holy Spirit speak to me,
(29:20):
not just like okay, like kind of just yep, get
into it. Okay, let's to Matthew. You know, it's like
Holy spirits speak to me and he always honors that
request of like I'm listening, my ears are open. But
if I'm honest, it's like that's something that we all
could be better at. Is not just hearing from other people,
like I want to hear from the person I can see.
(29:40):
I want to It's the fast food. Oh I go
through and I'm like, hey, I just look, I've got
time for about twenty minutes of someone else spending time
processing this. And that's what we know about the nutrition
value of processed food. Not that great, you know, But
do I eat it?
Speaker 4 (29:55):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (29:56):
More than I care to admit, but so But I
think the raw ingredients of the world with the Holy
Spirit forging that inside of us is so important. It's
where the word ruminate comes from roumen Is. I think
that the one of the cow's stomach stomachs. They have
four stomachs. Cows have four stomachs and they chewer. This
(30:17):
is weird that break it down cows. No, cows have
four stomachs. The first stomach is called the room, and
they chew on the grass. And it's where it changes
the state. So ruminate or meditate on these words. And
like you're saying, memorize, the more we go to PowerPoint nights,
we're talking about it and it's like that's the rumination
(30:37):
of where it changes the state from words on the
page to become alive and active and the nutrition I
get the nutrition out of that from cows stomachs. A
bit gross if you need a different metaphor to think
about whatever, But I do think that, like ruminate on
these things with the Holy Spirit, that's when it starts
to change its state. It becomes the living, breathing word
of God that changes who I am, Like I want it.
(30:59):
I want it to change me. That's the guy I
wanted to be a double edged sword that trims up
and you know, prunes. The things in my life that
aren't right aren't good. So ruminate. There you go. That's
the cow biology. Is that a thing? Biology? There is?
Speaker 4 (31:14):
Now?
Speaker 3 (31:14):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (31:15):
Yeah, that's how biology one on one on.
Speaker 1 (31:17):
The upload, you know, we learned something new every day.
Speaker 4 (31:20):
No, but I think just kind of that and just chewing,
Like you said, isn't there something with cows where they
like it? It's called cut?
Speaker 3 (31:26):
Yeah, cut to the cut.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (31:28):
I get this picture when you were talking about that
of like a cow constantly just chewing, and like how
we should just constantly be.
Speaker 3 (31:34):
Like meditate, d like the Bible says that, like it
gives us the instructions like that's what that's what you
should do. But we just throw down our wall as
an ornamental sword. Everyone likes. It's in our you.
Speaker 1 (31:46):
Know, coffee mug.
Speaker 3 (31:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (31:48):
Yeah, Well, I feel like all of this and and
talking about ingesting more and just being more equipped, I'm
curious to know, like when it comes to you and
like work platform things like that, what do you see
in the future of what your I guess platform is
going to look like? Does anything come to mind? Like
has God planted a seed in you and you're like
(32:10):
maybe one day.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
Yeah, that's a great question, I think. I mean I
have a podcast as well, and so that podcast has
kind of been just an outlet for organic conversation like
this and just kind of gearing that more towards those
faith based conversations and just being more unapologetic of my
faith and bold and not having that hesitation rule over
(32:33):
me and just being obedient to the Lord and being
proud of my faith and using it as a way
to you know, show people God's love. I think I'm
still going to be just sharing my life, but just
kind of not holding back in the ways that I
have been before of you know, actually sharing my outfits,
in my workouts and whatever else I'm doing, but also
(32:55):
what am I doing every day to grow my relationship
with the Lord? Because in reality, that's like so much
of my day and so much of my mind that
the day is consumed, like we're talking about meditating.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
On the Lord.
Speaker 2 (33:06):
That is something that I really try to do every
day is just fix my mind and my heart and
have everything I do stem from Him. And you know,
everything we do is either a reflection of God or
it's not. And so it's like just really trying to
have everything I do be a reflection of him and
just share that with my audience in a way that
I haven't before, and just being honest and real, like
(33:27):
how you're saying. So it's hard to pinpoint one thing really,
but just kind of as a whole, that's my goal.
Speaker 4 (33:34):
Well as we kind of like wrap things up a
little bit. I feel like when it comes to social
media period, whether you're consuming, whether you're posting everything, it's
like a comparison game, right, Like there's so much comparison,
especially as females. You see somebody post something, you're like, well,
my body doesn't look like that, or my house doesn't
look like that, my kids aren't there yet, that kind
of stuff dealing with comparison and insecurity. What encouragement would
(33:57):
you give to someone who's watching or listening to this
post post. What encouragement would you give to them if
they're they're in the middle of that comparison game.
Speaker 2 (34:05):
Right, That's such a great question. That's such a real
issue with social media, I think, and that's like why
I don't like social media sometimes. But I think there's
kind of layers to that. One layer is that you know,
no matter what you look like, you're always going to
be insecure. And I feel like that can feel kind
of defeating sometimes of like, Okay, I'm never going to
be happy, I'm never going to get there, But it
(34:26):
can also be freeing in the sense of like i
can do this set and the other and I'm still
not going to be fulfilled, because that's not what's meant
to fulfill me, like my body, my looks. You know,
beauty is deceiving and it fades. And also life is
a vapor, and so I just really encourage people to
spend your time focusing on things that are eternal and
(34:46):
things that will actually give value, because you know, we
could die tomorrow, you know, and would you want to
spend your last days and hours thinking about how you
don't like the way you look in this outfit, or
how you don't like your hair or whatever. It is,
just these things don't matter. And I think just really
marinating on the fact that God made you. I think
(35:08):
that that is something again that we as believers can say,
you know, God made us in his image and he
crafted us in the womb, and.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
We know that and we believe that.
Speaker 2 (35:16):
But if we think like the God who made everything
the most beautiful things in the world, he made you like,
he made you exactly the way that you're supposed to be.
Like that is something that if I really let myself
think about that and like understand what that means, it's
like overwhelming and it makes me feel so convicted of
like how can I think that something that the God
(35:37):
of the universe created is ugly, like you know, and
isn't enough?
Speaker 1 (35:41):
And it just that thought is.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
So powerful sometimes and I think that can really change
my perspective. And you know, the body's also a temple,
like we're called to take care of ourselves and all
of that is good, and the enemy uses that so much,
I think, to point us against each other and point
us against ourselves and just kind of take away that
stronghold from the enemy and take the power back by
our mind. I think there's so much power in the mind.
(36:06):
There's so much power in where we let our thoughts go.
And it's crazy because we can control it.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
You know, we can control our.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
Mind, and it takes practice and repetition, but with the
help of the Holy Spirit, we can, you know, let
our minds be directed on things eternal and how God
sees us in God's truth about us, and so just
kind of the practice of stopping those thoughts in your
track or in their track and focusing on what God
says is true.
Speaker 3 (36:29):
I think that's teaching my nine year old that right now, yes,
he it's you know, he's wrestling with fear at nighttime
and to take these thoughts captive idea, and it's it's
challenging me because I'm like, well, how do you teach
a nine year old to do what you're saying, which
is like, can control your thoughts? And he's like, no,
I can't. I can't control my thoughts. I'm like, yes,
(36:51):
you can, and said then I'm doing exercises with him
and I'll just I'll ask him questions different things. I'm like,
now you fearful, Like we would go down the track
like eight minutes liths like what are you doing here?
We go it's just gets on the phone. But I
might take him away from it and I'm like what
did you think about it? And that time he's like no,
and I'm like, well, what I took the thoughts captive?
So can you lead that process? Because otherwise the enemy
(37:13):
will the enemy will just like take you down this
trail and you're going down like you were following my
trail that I was leading for you. And so regardless,
I think it's a really powerful thought because that is
the truth of like when you're on social media and
when you're dealing with the comparison and when you do
have the insecurities. Everyone has the birds that fly over
the head, but do we let them make a nest
(37:36):
in our hair? And it's like, how do we get
good at at doing that? And I think that is
always a wrestle. Do you have any thoughts on like
what's your best shoeing technique?
Speaker 4 (37:46):
How do I take this captive?
Speaker 2 (37:48):
How do you I think just when I think about
the person that I want to be, I don't want
to be someone who is weighed down by jealousy, and
you know, I think it's just an ugly tree to have,
you know. I think when I see other people, I
want to call out the good in them and not
let it affect the way that I see myself, because
(38:08):
you know, they can be one thing and I can
be one thing, and they can both be true at
the same time, you know. And so I think just
really thinking about who do I want to be like,
at my core, do I want to be someone who
sees others beauty and calls it out or sees other's
beauty and tears myself down over that? And even maybe,
like I think sometimes those feelings can linger and turn
(38:30):
into you know, resentment towards other people or anger, and
you know that's the enemy, just taking a foothold, and
so just really kind of calling that out and saying,
do I want to be someone who thinks this way
about myself and others?
Speaker 4 (38:42):
Know?
Speaker 2 (38:43):
Okay, then how do I do that? How how can
God help me do that? What does God say about that?
And just kind of like having those those again, those
verses that scripture in your head to repeat over yourself
and just affirm yourself and turn your thoughts towards.
Speaker 1 (38:56):
What is good.
Speaker 3 (38:57):
And that's why that let's go back full circle judging
the thoughts and intentions of the heart, right, not just
the mind. And so those things that we wrestle with
are reflex thoughts. It's not like I'm like, Okay, now
I'm going to think about being jealous. Here we go
like you just are jealous, you know, you just or
you are comparison. It's like this reflex part will guard
(39:19):
your heart, for out of it flows the issues of life.
Those reflexes the subconscious. My dreams don't come from my
mind because I'm unconscious. My dreams come from my heart.
So I think about like loss of friendship, loss of
all the pain, like I dream those things. And so
I'm like, Okay, these things are in my heart, and
that the Word of God is alive and active and
through the Holy Spirit. That's the power of it is
(39:41):
that it can create in me a new heart. It
guards my heart. It were like a scalpel. There's heart
surgery that goes on. So I don't want that reflex
And when I feel the reflexes, ah, I'm just on
this in myself, Like I'm on this train big time
at the moment. I don't want to just constantly be
fighting reflexes. Yeah, which means I got a hot issue.
(40:03):
I don't think I'm strong enough to just keep showing
off like fever.
Speaker 4 (40:07):
Anyway, someone said this this past week, and I guess
this is why I heard it, because this is such
a thing where it's like your heart right, like with
especially my kids, Like when I don't ever want my
kids to go through a broken heart. But when they do,
I want Jesus to be the first thing that falls
in to that brokenness. And I want that to be
my heart posture where when something happens to me or
(40:28):
you know, a comparison, thought comes or judgment, whatever, I
want Jesus to be the first thing that falls in
and not that comparison, not that judgment. So I think
that's such a it's like a beautiful bow put on
the end of this podcast where it's like we want
to be equipped, so this falls in first, so the
comparison doesn't fall in first.
Speaker 3 (40:45):
Absolutely, that's good.
Speaker 4 (40:47):
Good. Wow, that's a word for someone man. Okay, So
we always end with a little pray request anything in
your life right now that we can pray for you,
specifically for I love that.
Speaker 2 (40:56):
I would just say, kind of just going off what
we're talking about, just a boldness and sharing my faith
online and just yeah, I think just going out there
and doing the Lord's work. I think there's power and
prayer behind that, and just that whatever I share would
hit the right people and would do a work in
me as well.
Speaker 3 (41:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (41:13):
All right, well I'm going to pray us out Heavenly
Father Lord. We just say thank you again for these
microphones and the words that you are putting into them. God,
that they are glorifying you, And that is the whole point.
We just specifically pray over Maddie and her boldness, that Lord,
you would just take any of the comparison thoughts captive. Lord,
that there would just be an undeniable boldness about her
(41:36):
faith in the next coming season. Lord, that you would
just equip her with the tools that she needs to
speak of your love, to speak of your glory, of
your wisdom. Lord, And I just pray over her specifically, Lord,
that you would just bless everything she touches, her platform, Lord,
her podcast, just her life. God, that you would just
(41:56):
continue to show up in supernatural ways. Lord, that when
things get hard, that you would just continue to cover
her with a blanket of peace that you've given her. God,
And we just say thank you for her boldness already,
that she is willing and ready to be a servant
of the Kingdom. And we just we just asked that
you bless it in Jesus' name.
Speaker 1 (42:14):
Amen so much, Thanks, so fun
Hi, I'm Matty Perry.
Speaker 2 (00:01):
I have lost everything that matters to me really, and
it was kind of like rock Bottom. I've heard God
like save me. He's with me and you'll see him again.
God is real, Like I know I heard him.
Speaker 1 (00:12):
I felt him.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
Everything that God's called you to do in sharing, have
you wrestled with that?
Speaker 2 (00:17):
God gave me this platform and the world is going
to condemn me no matter what. There's kind of a
spark I think all around with Christians wanting to be
more bold in their faith.
Speaker 1 (00:27):
And this is the upload.
Speaker 4 (00:30):
Matty Perry joining us on the upload today. We're so
excited to chat with you about your journey and I
know some of your story, but I feel like a
lot of people know you mostly from just your online
presence and sort of sharing most of your life online.
But I feel like people define you as the quote
unquote influencer, right, Like that's the content creation, like the
(00:51):
influencer part of life. But I'm curious how you define
the word faith.
Speaker 2 (00:55):
Yeah, well, thank you guys so much for having me.
It's so excited to be here. That's like great question.
I think faith can be defined in a lot of ways.
I would say, for me, it's kind of like the
all in dedication and belief that God is sovereign, that
God rules, and that God is trustworthy and good in
your life. I think as a believer, I think it's
(01:18):
easy to kind of say those things and not really
believe them.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
You know, you can.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Say that you believe God's word is true, but as
soon as you lose the job, or lose the relationship
or finances are tough, it's like you kind of just
give into fear and all of that, and to really
believe and know that God is true and all that
requires so much faith. So that's I would think that's
how I define it.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
Yeah, And I feel like sometimes in life the word
faith can mean different things, right, depending on the season
that you're in or what you're going through. Can you
go back to a part where you know something happened
in your life where you could tangibly feel like faith
is real, this is something that I believe in and
I can feel it.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Yeah, I would say the biggest thing that's happened in
my life that a test of my faith is a
huge part of my testimony. Actually, I dated someone for
about four and a half years who passed away very
unexpectedly when I was let's see how it was. I
think I was twenty one, so.
Speaker 1 (02:12):
It was a while ago, but that was a huge
turning point in my life for faith.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
I think I kind of got to the point where
I was like, I've lost everything that matters to me really,
and it was kind of like rock bottom. But looking
back now, it was such a beautiful thing in my
life because I'd believed and got up to that point,
and I had gone to church and I'd done all
the things to be like morally a Christian, but I
hadn't really had a personal, deep intimate relationship with God
(02:39):
up until that point. And I think that was kind
of like a turning point in my just journey with
Him because like I said, it was a point where
I felt like I'd lost everything and I had felt
I was like, I can't really describe it other than
like the blanket of peace that people talk about, which
I'd heard that before.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
And I'd never felt before.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
And it was literally like a blanket like covering me
and like just supernatural experience of God being near to
the broken hearted, and that really defined my walk with
Him and yeah, really led me just on this trajectory
of pursuing Him with everything that I am, because I
was kind of like one fit in, one fit out,
you know, keeping certain things to myself and not handing
them over to God. And at that point, I was like,
(03:18):
literally nothing else matters other than how I love people
and how I love God. And it's never been more
clear to me. And God is so real, and he's
so present and close to those who need him and
those who ask and seek for him, and so yeah,
that would that's like the biggest.
Speaker 1 (03:36):
Part of my life. I would say that.
Speaker 2 (03:38):
I think that I really kind of had to have
faith because it was like either.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Have it or you don't.
Speaker 2 (03:43):
You know, like when those things happen, it's like it
either throws you more into a relationship with God or
it kind of turns you away totally. And that for me,
I'm so grateful that that was a moment where God
really sought after me and allowed me to seek after
him as well.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
Yeah. God is such a personal god, and I think
the matter of faith is such a personal topic and
many many people have conversations with It's always, it seems
to be always those defining moments of pain, some of
those real trials where it's like, Okay, what do I
really believe? And it's interesting you use the word that
(04:18):
trial of having someone so close to you pass away
was a gift. That definition, you know, as not just
a something that you're mad at God and wrestling with still,
but it's like, what was the process in you for
that becoming a place of healing and a still a scar,
(04:39):
still very real pain, but a defining moment where you
can look back and go that was a gift. That
journey was a gift. That's a big state.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
I think there's a verse that I'm going to butcher it,
but it's like blessed or the broken hearted, for they
receive the comfort of God or something along those lines.
Or the closeness of God is so true because it's like,
you know, you think of life and you think of
these trials, and it's like, I don't want that to
happen to me, Like I don't want to lose someone
close to me. I don't want to go through that
this or that because of how horrible it is. And
(05:07):
that's true, but also on the other hand, just that
closeness of God is so real and it's something that
I have never experienced other than those times. Of discomfort
and heartache and loss, and so it's like inexplainable just
how what the enemy wants to use for evil, God
plans for good and it's just so clear, and it's
(05:30):
a blessing to be able to experience that, Like not
everyone in life will go through hard things, right, but
to have experienced that at such a young age has
pros and cons. But the pro is far outwagh the cons.
Looking back now, it's hard to see when you're in it.
When you're in it, you're just like, day by day,
how can I.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
Get through this? And what can I do? And God
just sustained me.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
But now looking back it's been about eight and a
half years since that happened, and just being able to
see God move in my life and transform me through that,
and it's like, I'm never going to say that I'm
glad that that happened, because you know, I'm not glad
that He's not on this earth anymore, but I can
be so thankful in God's goodness and how He's used
(06:13):
it for his glory.
Speaker 4 (06:15):
I want to go back to where you describe kind
of the blanket of peace and the feeling behind that,
because I think for somebody who's listening who might not
be a believer or doesn't really understand religion or a
relationship with the Lord. Describe what you are feeling in
those moments like leading up to finding that blanket of peace,
and just the radical like transition of those feelings, because
(06:36):
I feel like tangibly you probably just like felt, you know,
a piece of your heart just kind of feel warm almost,
you know.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Yeah, right.
Speaker 2 (06:44):
And so this happened the day after I found out
that he passed, and I was just sitting in my
kitchen and I was just like I that person was
someone that kind of like fell like home, you know,
and then it was like, Okay, now they're gone, and
it just was thisiness that I was feeling, and I
was just sitting there like kind of grappling with that,
and yeah, I just felt this overwhelming piece just come
(07:08):
over me. And I felt like I've heard God like
say to me, He's with me and you'll see him again.
And I never really felt like I heard the voice
of God before, and it was just undeniable. It was
like that was God that just spoke to me, and
it was just this comfort and a time where like
looking at it from a worldly perspective. I should have
never have felt comfort in that it was just all
(07:29):
heartache and loss, But you see it time and time again,
like this is a testimony that so many people have
that go through loss. It's like, if everyone's saying the
same thing is happening to them, that they feel this
comfort of God in these moments of complete darkness, how
can it not be real?
Speaker 1 (07:45):
You know?
Speaker 2 (07:45):
And like I said earlier, like in order to feel that,
you have to go through these hard things. So it's
and I'm not saying that God only works in hard times,
because he can work whenever he wants and you don't
have to go through something like that, but a benefit
of that is that God will work and he will
use it for good. And so I think there's power
in that testimony and the you know, there's the fact
(08:08):
that when believers go through these things, everyone has similar
instances of God giving them that peace when they shouldn't
have in peace, and God just speaking to them and
sustaining them in that time.
Speaker 4 (08:18):
Yeah, do you feel like when you heard the Lord
say that, did that kind of like open you up
to hearing his voice more often and like knowing him
and knowing when he's saying something.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Yeah, definitely. I think it just kind of sparked this
relationship with me and the Holy Spirit that I hadn't
had before, and it just kind of opened that door.
And I think I had up until that point, like
I said, not really had that personal relationship with God.
And at that point I was like, Okay, God is real,
Like I know, I heard him, I felt him in
a way I never had before. So that kind of
(08:50):
like how we were defining faith, like the just full
belief and trust that God is good and sovereign, and
I had that then and when I didn't have that before,
and so yeah, it just kind of gave me that
new perspective and that new faith and just kind of
I didn't have, I didn't doubt the way that I
did before.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
I think that's when it becomes real to you, like
you're saying, like it goes from being this idea or
this belief system to this really personal conviction. That process
is different for everyone, but I think even in my
own life, the catalyst often is just things that I
can't understand, you know, like things that doesn't make sense.
(09:28):
I can't there's no formula to add it up. It's
the piece that goes beyond all understanding, and when you
this is true even though it doesn't make sense or
I can't. There's no formula to you know, reason, there's
no you know. And so I think to me, that
evidence in the loss, in the pain that I can't deny.
(09:49):
It's not something someone told me, and I believe it's
like something that I know deep in me that can't
be taken away. Can't be convinced. I can't be out convinced.
Is that a word convinced? I can't be convinced. I
can't be convinced out of it, you know. And so
for me, it's it's so cool to hear that. And
I wonder just in having a platform, having a voice
(10:11):
and wrestling with I imagine, just like, what do you
say boldness, courage, outspoken, gently bringing it to people, knowing
that you know people have different perspectives, different backgrounds. How
have you found it in your voice, in everything that
God's called you to do, in sharing in boldness? In
(10:32):
what's the right level? Have you wrestled with that?
Speaker 1 (10:34):
Right?
Speaker 2 (10:34):
Yeah, that's funny that you bring that up, because I
feel like that is something that I've been dealing with recently,
I feel like I, you know, have been given this
platform and I share just kind of my life and
with that, like fashion, travel, whatever, and then I'll also
incorporate my faith in my testimony with devotionals I'm reading
how I'm feeling challenging the Lord when I'm learning in
small groups and things like that. But I have recently
(10:58):
felt a bit of a conviction to do that with
more boldness. And I think there's been a hesitancy before
of you know, it is my job, so I don't
want to make people feel uncomfortable and I don't want
to shove my faith down people's throats and things like that.
But then there's also this balance of like, God gave
me this platform, and you know, the world is going
(11:18):
to condemning no matter what, and so I just need
to go for it. And I think there's kind of
a spark I think all around with Christians all over
right now of wanting to be more bold in their
faith and just speak out. And so that's been something
that I've been challenging myself to do because it's like,
you know, I'm thirty years old and I look back
at my life like, Okay, what am I doing? Like,
(11:39):
how am I being a good and faithful servant for
the Lord? And I think that is something that I
want to be more bolden and without being a quote
unquote Christian influencer, where you know, that's all they do
is share their faith, but find a way to incorporate
it in my work in a way that really affects
people and transforms people. And it's not about, you know,
(12:01):
the outcome. God is pleased with the obedience in that,
and so just being obedient to this conviction that I'm
feeling and really going after that. So yeah, that's something
that I definitely have been feeling and excited. I'm excited
about it, and yeah, I'm excited to see what God
does to that.
Speaker 4 (12:18):
Well, we were just talking. You said something just I
don't know, it was like thirty minutes ago. You were
talking about how like I don't answer to anybody but God,
you know, and like we are taught in the world
where all these other opinions matter, and that you know,
you hear something from someone and it's a criticism and
you feel bad. You're like, Okay, well maybe I don't
want to I can't take that. But answering to that
(12:38):
and seeing the fruit that comes out of being obedient
to God. I think it is such a cool a
thing to tangibly watch you as a friend, like see
you posting things and just be even more authentic to
who you are, and it's just it's a beautiful thing.
And I think that hearing you say yes and watching
you say yes has been really cool to watch, especially
too with just like sharing your store and sharing more
(13:01):
of you know, a lot of the influencer life quote
unquote looks so pretty and so just perfect, right, and
it's just like we all have messy parts in our
life that the Internet might not want to see, but
other people are feeling those things right, and it's so
beautiful to see, you know, like somebody who might not
know that you're a Christian and they're like, oh, yeah,
(13:22):
I follow this girl Matty Perry. She's amazing, but then
to see her posts like oh I'm going through this
rough time too, Wow, I can relate even more to
that person. So going into that, I feel like, you know,
we all have these messy seasons in our life where
things just like get hard, and I know that you're
very open about like dating and things like that, you know,
losing a partner. Does that spill into dating life for you?
Speaker 1 (13:45):
Now?
Speaker 4 (13:45):
Is that something you think about where you're afraid to lose.
Speaker 2 (13:48):
Someone or that's a great question. I think no, but
also yes, because it's like, I know what it feels
like to lose someone super close, and I know that
that's bound to happen, and again, you know, it's just life.
Nobody lives forever, and so I think that's maybe in
the back of my mind, but I try not to
let that really take control of me, just because I've
(14:10):
really felt God say that he will redeem what happened
to me. And I just think that there have been
through a lot in relationships, like I went through that
and then I was also engaged before and I ended that,
and so there's just been a lot of trial there
and I just know that God is using it and
through sharing both of those experiences that have happened to me.
Is so many people have messaged me saying like, thank
(14:33):
you so much for sharing that that's had such an
impact on my life. And I just see God using it,
and so yeah, it is is definitely messy, like the
stories within that for sure, but yeah, I see God
using it and sharing that there's power in that testimony totally.
Speaker 3 (14:51):
People hungry for real, Like I think really like there's
more than i've I'm thirty seven almost, and in my
sh life, I've never experienced the hunger in society for real,
like the rawness, realness, honesty. Have been wrestling with that
because the truth for me is like I do care
(15:11):
about what people think, not necessarily out of a fear
of man way and the obvious ways, but the truth
is out of good intentions, Like you were saying, it's
my work and I want to navigate this and steward
at well. So I don't want to be polarizing and
I don't want to put anyone off. But at the
same time, like my question through this whole season has
been are the good intentions still withdrawing? Are there good intentions,
(15:36):
good reasons the things that I've justified still putting how
people perceive it or whether it's going to be an
effective strategy, Like that's a big thing for me. It's
like is this the most effective way to do it?
Versus is this true? And is it right? And is
God asking me to do it? And so that's the
thought is like God, I want to I want to
be obedient. I want to be surrendered. I want to
(15:57):
live where well done, good and faithful servant, not just
you know what, you are pretty smart. You could figure
out all the different pieces and your EQ was high
and man, you kind of like were able to take
in a lot of threads of information and and channel
that into the best outcome. Like I feel like I
wrestle if I'm honest, if I can you know, that's
the realness for me, is like I wrestle with own strength,
(16:21):
good intention, stuff and so what I love to hear
and I'm just seeing all across the world I can
feel it with you, and our conversations recently have just
been so like, you know what, at the end of
the day, I've got one accountability. It's to God in obedience.
And part of the gig of truth is yeah, I
(16:41):
don't like that. That's wrong. You're a that was in
a swear word necessarily, but it was like insert whatever
is that a wrestle for you?
Speaker 1 (16:52):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (16:52):
And I think to your point, there are always going
to be those people that are like, you're wrong. I
disagree with you for this then and the other, But
there are so many people that are hungering for that
raalness and so many people who love the Lord and
want to learn and so not that you're ever going
to be doing anything for the validation of people, but
it is encouraging when you do step out, and sure
(17:14):
there's going to be pushedback, there always will be. But
then there's other people that are like God spoke to
me through this, and that encouragement of like, Okay, this
is why God wants me to be doing these things.
He wants me to be speaking to these people and
touching these people in this way. And I think so
much of it is personal conviction and just being in
tune with your heart and staying rooted in scripture, in
(17:36):
God's word and having that personal relationship with Him to
keep you accountable, to keep your heart in the right
place of Okay, am I sharing this because I want
validation of these people or because I want to look
a certain way? Or on the other hand, am I
holding back because I'm scared of this and the other
Like I recently, I do a lot of things that
(17:57):
I don't share online because I've struggled with that, Like
I don't want to come across as I'm doing this,
so I have something to post I'm bragging about this
or whatever. And I really felt like God telling me
because when I'm scrolling and I see videos of people
going out and stepping out on their faith, I'm not thinking, Oh,
they're doing that for views. I'm thinking that's amazing. I
(18:18):
want to do something like that, not to post, but
just in life, Like I want to be someone who
goes out and does those things. And so I have
this platform. Why not share what I'm doing so that
I can be that for other people. And I just
really had to have a heart check, like, Okay, is
that why I'm doing it? Or am I doing it
for validation? And I was like, no, I feel like
the Lord's showing me this. And so, for example, a
(18:39):
video that I posted recently, like I something I do
is I like to have just like little homeless bags
in my car and then like hand them out to
people and I see them and pray for them, and
I put little bibles in there and foods and snacks
and whatever. And so I made a video of me
going out and putting those together and handing them out,
and I was really nervous about it because I was like,
I just don't want this to come across as a
certain way, and I just kind of had to.
Speaker 1 (19:00):
Let that go.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
And the response was amazing, Like so many people were
like this encouraged me to go do this and to
pray for people because I kind of talked about how
praying for people that I don't know is intimidating and
this is kind of a way to practice like exposure
therapy kind of like just do it for as many
people as he can SI get more comfortable. And so
I got a lot of people saying that God spoke
(19:23):
to them through that, and I just felt like, Okay,
this is what I want to use my platform for.
And sure there was a pushback in people, you know,
mean comments and whatever, but it's just like it is
what it is, you know, just listening to those convictions
and just you know, God knows your heart. So whatever
your heart is, if it's has good intentions or bad,
He's going to know no matter what the outcome is
(19:44):
with you know, with people around you. But and the feedback,
but just yeah, staying true to your heart and being
in tune with God's word and being rooted in that
and then stepping out in that He knows what your
intentions are.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
That's what the I think it's Hebrews that says, sharper
than a double edged sword, is the Bible dividing between
soul and spirit, judging the thoughts and intentions of the heart.
And I do think that's a daily thing. That's why
it's like, yeah, the Bible, it's a good idea to read,
but really it's actually the scalpel to like, I'm human.
Those thoughts come in my head all the time of
like am I doing this for this? And then I'm
(20:21):
double bluffing myself, trickle bluffing myself. But the Bible is
just like, no, this is actually what if you do
this for the least of these? In fact, Matthew twenty
five says, the shift or the binary between sheep and
goats that happens in the birthing pains at the end
times is it is about what you do for It
is about having bags in your car for those who
(20:42):
are struggling to find food. Like that's literally doing it
and encouraging others to do it. Amazing because that's the
difference between the ones that I'll say, world, I'm good
and faithful servant versus sorry, who are you? And that's
pretty serious. That's eternity kind of stuff, and how often
I've let, oh, how does.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
This look right?
Speaker 3 (21:02):
I might like, you know, I should just maybe I
shouldn't encourage, I shouldn't video this because people might think
da da dara. And that's exactly what I mean. Like,
that's a perfect example that video of the good intentions
that can rip us off, rob us from the influence right,
because I love and hate that influencer has become a thing,
(21:22):
because influence is absolutely the call. Light on a lampstand
so of the earth, that's the call. We used to
be called influencers church, funny enough, which was before it
was a thing. It was fifteen years ago, because we
started a political party because we believe that influence is
what God's called us to have. The Body of Christ
(21:43):
is called to speak and stand up, and the enemy
wants to say no, the church and state separate. So anyway,
I just want to validate the influencer status and say, yeah,
that's the calling. In fact, i'd argue, make disciples of
all nations, teaching them to obey my commands, baptizing the
name of the Father and Son, Holy Spirit. Truly, you
could argue that all of us have that assignment to influence. Yeah,
(22:05):
and so some people are better leaders than others. You
seem to be a better leader than me because you
have more followers. So I know, well, it is you know,
a leader by the by who's following. And so I
think that's not something that we are like a little
bit like, oh, you know, a little bit weird about.
But I just want to I guess you want to
smash that because I think that's can you say crap
on this podcast, But that's I just don't think. I think.
(22:27):
I think the enemy would love nothing to steal, kill
and destroyer, to create shame on rob and dim our light.
It shouldn't be put under a bowl. But anyway, all
that to say, that's my rant. There's no question here
other than that's my rant.
Speaker 2 (22:39):
Yeah, and I love that you brought up the verse
about the double edged sword. I was actually just talking
about that with a friend the other day because just
kind of looking at like, you know, the double edged sword,
it's so much more powerful, it's so much more deadly,
and you know, use it in battle for all of
these benefits, but then you also need to train so
much more with the double edged sword versus single age
and It's like, how true is that in our spiritual
(22:59):
life too? You know, we need to be training ourselves
behind closed doors. We need to be rooting ourselves in
the world and learning about what God says and just
who He is and not not reading scripture and you know,
applying it to who we think God is, but letting
it transform us because I think so often we kind
(23:21):
of have this idea of God that we make up
in our heads and we use scripture to kind of
fit that idea, and that idea is based usually loosely
on like worldly things. And to just be transformed by
God's word and who he is, even if it makes
us uncomfortable and really know that, and just be someone
who has an intimate relationship with Him behind closed doors
(23:41):
and that will translate in these other things like going
out and making disciples and using our influence and sharing
Him in the workplace and whatever that is. But it's
like it requires that training. You can't just go out
and do that without having that personal relationship and doing
the work on your own.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Yeah, to be equipped to do that totally.
Speaker 4 (24:00):
I love that you're bringing that up because me and
one of my best friends we were just recently talking
about this how you know, we read it devotional and
we you know, you check the box of your time
with the Lord every day and you do these things.
But like, I want to know this more, Like I
want to open up the Bible and I want to
know exactly where to turn to say no, this is
what God says, you know what I mean, and just
(24:20):
that yearning and that lean in where you're just like, no,
I want to know this more. I want to be
equipped with the words that the Lord says. And I
think that we're all kind of experiencing that right now
in the world in general. And it's just such a
cool thing to be a part of to see people
around us be like, yeah, me too, Okay, me too.
It's not just me, you too.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
Cool.
Speaker 4 (24:40):
It's like this crazy revival and it's just, I don't know,
it's really cool to be a part of.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
So let's talk about that. Let's talk about training with
the sword. Let's talk about I want to know you know,
as you're saying, I don't want to just do a
check with Giana, I should read the Bible. Let's understand
on a principal level, but like, what does it look
like for you both to train in the word God.
What does it look like to read it more than
just like, okay, yes, reaping and sewing. Yep, okay, you know,
(25:06):
do good unto other people? Great, got it, I'll try
and do that. But like, what does it look like
to apply says? It's alive and active, sharper than doubled
double edged sword. It's it's the word of God. Is
God breathed? Paul says to Timothy, It's God breathed? What
does that mean? That's that's more than There's hints here
all through the Bible of like, this thing isn't just
(25:27):
the best selling book of all time year after year
after year after year. Just doesn't it never gets knocked
off and never will. But what makes this different? And
how should we read it different?
Speaker 4 (25:37):
Right?
Speaker 3 (25:38):
That's the I think that's what I want to get too.
Speaker 2 (25:40):
So thoughts on that, Yeah, I mean, that's definitely something
that I've been wanting to do recently. It's been on
my heart, and I think that there are so many
layers to that because I think, you know, for me personally,
I've gone through waves of like, oh, listening to a
bunch of podcasts and sermons and all these things, but
not really diving into the word, Like how you're saying
you can be in the right mindset, but just avoiding
(26:01):
all like the one thing that you need to do,
which is really dive into scripture. And I think for me,
just having commentary pulled up that I can dive into,
taking it slow, like going verse by verse and really
memorizing scripture. That's a huge thing, because how you're saying,
like everyone's feeling this kind of conviction to learn more
so that we can go out and speak and have
(26:22):
these conversations. I think I've found myself recently just being honest,
wanting to have these conversations with non believers, but not
being able to pull up these verses and have these
biblical answers, and I just don't have those tools in
my belt, and I'm like, Okay, I need to memorize
the word, like I need to have these verses ready
to go and be able to answer these questions. And
(26:43):
so I've just really been trying to focus on that,
memorizing the scripture and just understanding it with that commentary,
and then pairing that obviously with preaching. I think it's
a pository preaching XBO, Yeah, yeah, that's you know, just
diving into the scripture verse by verse and really unpacking
(27:03):
that and being able to listen to preachers like that
and have them poorant to me.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
And then also in community and.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
Just having people keep yeah, having people keep you accountable
with memorizing scripture and like talking about what do we
think this means, having these debates, Like I'm literally going
to a PowerPoint night in a couple of weeks where
we're going to talk about like the big questions in
Christianity and what we think about and why and what
scripture says and just being able to learn from other
people and grow in that way, and you know, all
(27:33):
of that just builds up like the tool belt like
I'm talking about, and just having that ready to go
so that we can go and make disciples and hold
up our end of the bargain when defending the Bible
and just help bring people to God that way.
Speaker 4 (27:48):
Yeah, that intentional just yes, right, Like that's what it's
all about, is just the yes, Like yes, I want
to know more. And it's funny that you brought up
that was expository teaching. Yeah, because I was talking to
one of my friends the other day about like this
yearning in my heart of like wanting just to know more, right,
And he was just like, Okay, you're probably used to
topical teaching where it's like this is what happened yesterday
(28:09):
and it reminds me of this verse, and which is fine.
But he was just like, go to Matthew and spend
a whole month in Matthew and learn Matthew front to
back and just know every little detail about Matthew. And
it was just like then the next month jump over
to here, you know what I mean, And that just
really just you're in the word. You're not thinking about
how it applies to your life. You're just learning this
(28:29):
and I think it's so important, Like you said, to
equip your tool belt with the knowledge of the Word,
and that's I mean something that I'm going through too.
Speaker 3 (28:38):
It's yeah, and it's a live like who makes it
come alive? As I'm reading it, I'm like, okay, meaning
that it applies when I go through I lose someone
close to me. Like we're talking about how is that
real for me? You know, in that moment you're in
the kitchen, you hear the voice of the Holy Spirit.
You know, you feel that peace when you're reading the
(28:58):
Word of God. The Holy Spirit is the one that
makes it alive for me. And you know, I think
that's when I sit down and I don't do it
a lot. But it's like I don't do it a lot.
That was a little bit too real, I did. I
want to do it more. Okay, that's what I meant
to say. Let's just say that. But it's like I
really got to start with Holy Spirit speak to me,
(29:20):
not just like okay, like kind of just yep, get
into it. Okay, let's to Matthew. You know, it's like
Holy spirits speak to me and he always honors that
request of like I'm listening, my ears are open. But
if I'm honest, it's like that's something that we all
could be better at. Is not just hearing from other people,
like I want to hear from the person I can see.
(29:40):
I want to It's the fast food. Oh I go
through and I'm like, hey, I just look, I've got
time for about twenty minutes of someone else spending time
processing this. And that's what we know about the nutrition
value of processed food. Not that great, you know, But
do I eat it?
Speaker 4 (29:55):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (29:56):
More than I care to admit, but so But I
think the raw ingredients of the world with the Holy
Spirit forging that inside of us is so important. It's
where the word ruminate comes from roumen Is. I think
that the one of the cow's stomach stomachs. They have
four stomachs. Cows have four stomachs and they chewer. This
(30:17):
is weird that break it down cows. No, cows have
four stomachs. The first stomach is called the room, and
they chew on the grass. And it's where it changes
the state. So ruminate or meditate on these words. And
like you're saying, memorize, the more we go to PowerPoint nights,
we're talking about it and it's like that's the rumination
(30:37):
of where it changes the state from words on the
page to become alive and active and the nutrition I
get the nutrition out of that from cows stomachs. A
bit gross if you need a different metaphor to think
about whatever, But I do think that, like ruminate on
these things with the Holy Spirit, that's when it starts
to change its state. It becomes the living, breathing word
of God that changes who I am, Like I want it.
(30:59):
I want it to change me. That's the guy I
wanted to be a double edged sword that trims up
and you know, prunes. The things in my life that
aren't right aren't good. So ruminate. There you go. That's
the cow biology. Is that a thing? Biology? There is?
Speaker 4 (31:14):
Now?
Speaker 3 (31:14):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (31:15):
Yeah, that's how biology one on one on.
Speaker 1 (31:17):
The upload, you know, we learned something new every day.
Speaker 4 (31:20):
No, but I think just kind of that and just chewing,
Like you said, isn't there something with cows where they
like it? It's called cut?
Speaker 3 (31:26):
Yeah, cut to the cut.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (31:28):
I get this picture when you were talking about that
of like a cow constantly just chewing, and like how
we should just constantly be.
Speaker 3 (31:34):
Like meditate, d like the Bible says that, like it
gives us the instructions like that's what that's what you
should do. But we just throw down our wall as
an ornamental sword. Everyone likes. It's in our you.
Speaker 1 (31:46):
Know, coffee mug.
Speaker 3 (31:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (31:48):
Yeah, Well, I feel like all of this and and
talking about ingesting more and just being more equipped, I'm
curious to know, like when it comes to you and
like work platform things like that, what do you see
in the future of what your I guess platform is
going to look like? Does anything come to mind? Like
has God planted a seed in you and you're like
(32:10):
maybe one day.
Speaker 2 (32:11):
Yeah, that's a great question, I think. I mean I
have a podcast as well, and so that podcast has
kind of been just an outlet for organic conversation like
this and just kind of gearing that more towards those
faith based conversations and just being more unapologetic of my
faith and bold and not having that hesitation rule over
(32:33):
me and just being obedient to the Lord and being
proud of my faith and using it as a way
to you know, show people God's love. I think I'm
still going to be just sharing my life, but just
kind of not holding back in the ways that I
have been before of you know, actually sharing my outfits,
in my workouts and whatever else I'm doing, but also
(32:55):
what am I doing every day to grow my relationship
with the Lord? Because in reality, that's like so much
of my day and so much of my mind that
the day is consumed, like we're talking about meditating.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
On the Lord.
Speaker 2 (33:06):
That is something that I really try to do every
day is just fix my mind and my heart and
have everything I do stem from Him. And you know,
everything we do is either a reflection of God or
it's not. And so it's like just really trying to
have everything I do be a reflection of him and
just share that with my audience in a way that
I haven't before, and just being honest and real, like
(33:27):
how you're saying. So it's hard to pinpoint one thing really,
but just kind of as a whole, that's my goal.
Speaker 4 (33:34):
Well as we kind of like wrap things up a
little bit. I feel like when it comes to social
media period, whether you're consuming, whether you're posting everything, it's
like a comparison game, right, Like there's so much comparison,
especially as females. You see somebody post something, you're like, well,
my body doesn't look like that, or my house doesn't
look like that, my kids aren't there yet, that kind
of stuff dealing with comparison and insecurity. What encouragement would
(33:57):
you give to someone who's watching or listening to this
post post. What encouragement would you give to them if
they're they're in the middle of that comparison game.
Speaker 2 (34:05):
Right, That's such a great question. That's such a real
issue with social media, I think, and that's like why
I don't like social media sometimes. But I think there's
kind of layers to that. One layer is that you know,
no matter what you look like, you're always going to
be insecure. And I feel like that can feel kind
of defeating sometimes of like, Okay, I'm never going to
be happy, I'm never going to get there, But it
(34:26):
can also be freeing in the sense of like i
can do this set and the other and I'm still
not going to be fulfilled, because that's not what's meant
to fulfill me, like my body, my looks. You know,
beauty is deceiving and it fades. And also life is
a vapor, and so I just really encourage people to
spend your time focusing on things that are eternal and
(34:46):
things that will actually give value, because you know, we
could die tomorrow, you know, and would you want to
spend your last days and hours thinking about how you
don't like the way you look in this outfit, or
how you don't like your hair or whatever. It is,
just these things don't matter. And I think just really
marinating on the fact that God made you. I think
(35:08):
that that is something again that we as believers can say,
you know, God made us in his image and he
crafted us in the womb, and.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
We know that and we believe that.
Speaker 2 (35:16):
But if we think like the God who made everything
the most beautiful things in the world, he made you like,
he made you exactly the way that you're supposed to be.
Like that is something that if I really let myself
think about that and like understand what that means, it's
like overwhelming and it makes me feel so convicted of
like how can I think that something that the God
(35:37):
of the universe created is ugly, like you know, and
isn't enough?
Speaker 1 (35:41):
And it just that thought is.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
So powerful sometimes and I think that can really change
my perspective. And you know, the body's also a temple,
like we're called to take care of ourselves and all
of that is good, and the enemy uses that so much,
I think, to point us against each other and point
us against ourselves and just kind of take away that
stronghold from the enemy and take the power back by
our mind. I think there's so much power in the mind.
(36:06):
There's so much power in where we let our thoughts go.
And it's crazy because we can control it.
Speaker 1 (36:10):
You know, we can control our.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
Mind, and it takes practice and repetition, but with the
help of the Holy Spirit, we can, you know, let
our minds be directed on things eternal and how God
sees us in God's truth about us, and so just
kind of the practice of stopping those thoughts in your
track or in their track and focusing on what God
says is true.
Speaker 3 (36:29):
I think that's teaching my nine year old that right now, yes,
he it's you know, he's wrestling with fear at nighttime
and to take these thoughts captive idea, and it's it's
challenging me because I'm like, well, how do you teach
a nine year old to do what you're saying, which
is like, can control your thoughts? And he's like, no,
I can't. I can't control my thoughts. I'm like, yes,
(36:51):
you can, and said then I'm doing exercises with him
and I'll just I'll ask him questions different things. I'm like,
now you fearful, Like we would go down the track
like eight minutes liths like what are you doing here?
We go it's just gets on the phone. But I
might take him away from it and I'm like what
did you think about it? And that time he's like no,
and I'm like, well, what I took the thoughts captive?
So can you lead that process? Because otherwise the enemy
(37:13):
will the enemy will just like take you down this
trail and you're going down like you were following my
trail that I was leading for you. And so regardless,
I think it's a really powerful thought because that is
the truth of like when you're on social media and
when you're dealing with the comparison and when you do
have the insecurities. Everyone has the birds that fly over
the head, but do we let them make a nest
(37:36):
in our hair? And it's like, how do we get
good at at doing that? And I think that is
always a wrestle. Do you have any thoughts on like
what's your best shoeing technique?
Speaker 4 (37:46):
How do I take this captive?
Speaker 2 (37:48):
How do you I think just when I think about
the person that I want to be, I don't want
to be someone who is weighed down by jealousy, and
you know, I think it's just an ugly tree to have,
you know. I think when I see other people, I
want to call out the good in them and not
let it affect the way that I see myself, because
(38:08):
you know, they can be one thing and I can
be one thing, and they can both be true at
the same time, you know. And so I think just
really thinking about who do I want to be like,
at my core, do I want to be someone who
sees others beauty and calls it out or sees other's
beauty and tears myself down over that? And even maybe,
like I think sometimes those feelings can linger and turn
(38:30):
into you know, resentment towards other people or anger, and
you know that's the enemy, just taking a foothold, and
so just really kind of calling that out and saying,
do I want to be someone who thinks this way
about myself and others?
Speaker 4 (38:42):
Know?
Speaker 2 (38:43):
Okay, then how do I do that? How how can
God help me do that? What does God say about that?
And just kind of like having those those again, those
verses that scripture in your head to repeat over yourself
and just affirm yourself and turn your thoughts towards.
Speaker 1 (38:56):
What is good.
Speaker 3 (38:57):
And that's why that let's go back full circle judging
the thoughts and intentions of the heart, right, not just
the mind. And so those things that we wrestle with
are reflex thoughts. It's not like I'm like, Okay, now
I'm going to think about being jealous. Here we go
like you just are jealous, you know, you just or
you are comparison. It's like this reflex part will guard
(39:19):
your heart, for out of it flows the issues of life.
Those reflexes the subconscious. My dreams don't come from my
mind because I'm unconscious. My dreams come from my heart.
So I think about like loss of friendship, loss of
all the pain, like I dream those things. And so
I'm like, Okay, these things are in my heart, and
that the Word of God is alive and active and
through the Holy Spirit. That's the power of it is
(39:41):
that it can create in me a new heart. It
guards my heart. It were like a scalpel. There's heart
surgery that goes on. So I don't want that reflex
And when I feel the reflexes, ah, I'm just on
this in myself, Like I'm on this train big time
at the moment. I don't want to just constantly be
fighting reflexes. Yeah, which means I got a hot issue.
(40:03):
I don't think I'm strong enough to just keep showing
off like fever.
Speaker 4 (40:07):
Anyway, someone said this this past week, and I guess
this is why I heard it, because this is such
a thing where it's like your heart right, like with
especially my kids, Like when I don't ever want my
kids to go through a broken heart. But when they do,
I want Jesus to be the first thing that falls
in to that brokenness. And I want that to be
my heart posture where when something happens to me or
(40:28):
you know, a comparison, thought comes or judgment, whatever, I
want Jesus to be the first thing that falls in
and not that comparison, not that judgment. So I think
that's such a it's like a beautiful bow put on
the end of this podcast where it's like we want
to be equipped, so this falls in first, so the
comparison doesn't fall in first.
Speaker 3 (40:45):
Absolutely, that's good.
Speaker 4 (40:47):
Good. Wow, that's a word for someone man. Okay, So
we always end with a little pray request anything in
your life right now that we can pray for you,
specifically for I love that.
Speaker 2 (40:56):
I would just say, kind of just going off what
we're talking about, just a boldness and sharing my faith
online and just yeah, I think just going out there
and doing the Lord's work. I think there's power and
prayer behind that, and just that whatever I share would
hit the right people and would do a work in
me as well.
Speaker 3 (41:13):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (41:13):
All right, well I'm going to pray us out Heavenly
Father Lord. We just say thank you again for these
microphones and the words that you are putting into them. God,
that they are glorifying you, And that is the whole point.
We just specifically pray over Maddie and her boldness, that Lord,
you would just take any of the comparison thoughts captive. Lord,
that there would just be an undeniable boldness about her
(41:36):
faith in the next coming season. Lord, that you would
just equip her with the tools that she needs to
speak of your love, to speak of your glory, of
your wisdom. Lord, And I just pray over her specifically, Lord,
that you would just bless everything she touches, her platform, Lord,
her podcast, just her life. God, that you would just
(41:56):
continue to show up in supernatural ways. Lord, that when
things get hard, that you would just continue to cover
her with a blanket of peace that you've given her. God,
And we just say thank you for her boldness already,
that she is willing and ready to be a servant
of the Kingdom. And we just we just asked that
you bless it in Jesus' name.
Speaker 1 (42:14):
Amen so much, Thanks, so fun
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