October 21, 2021 • 22 mins
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
What's up? This is important community. Guess what? We got
a sick new sponsor, Trojan, America's number one condom brand,
Trojan Man, there are new potmas. I like to say,
I like it, you say it like that. Hot is
this in this episode? This is a bonus. We're giving
them that extra content coming in hot, hot, hot, and
(00:23):
you can hear it here, but guess where you can
also hear it where you can hear it on The
Pleasure is Ours feed and you got to say it
all sexy. The Pleasure is Ours feed, so you know,
check it out. I hope you dig it. The Pleasure
is Ours is brought to you by Trojan, America's number
one kind of brand. Feel your best, get yours on.
(00:49):
What's the show called? The Pleasure is Ours? I think
I know how we're kicking it off. You already know
the pleasure The Pleasure is Ours. We got a new podcast.
(01:11):
This is uh, this is our second We love casting.
Look at us go. The community demanded more and we're
giving it to him. We partnered with Trojan and we've
we're hosting season two of The Pleasure is Ours. And
I know I'm excited. And the Pleasure is Ours Oh yeah,
we're gonna roll this one down all the way to
the serial number. Hunh. I know. I'm excited with Blake
all being nude in this little zoom frame. I see. Yeah,
(01:34):
you guys have your shirts off. Yes, I think one
rule about doing the pleasure is ours is I'm gonna
do it topless. Take the bottoms off. I want to
see some nets. Take the bottoms off. Let's make it interesting.
Come on first, feel free to release the twins. We
were talking about your bush. It is pretty serious right now,
you were saying, yes, yes, I haven't. I haven't trimmed
in a while. It's been it's been a minute. Oh.
(01:55):
I actually for the Righteous Gemstones. Just last week, I
had to shave bear shave. I shaved my pubes. I
think that was the first time I've ever done that
in my life besides an accidental you left it like
a razor. No, no, no, no, no, I'm completely I
even I even shave my butt hole hair just because. Yeah. Well,
(02:18):
I was like, I was like, they might they're shooting
like from behind, and I think they might see some
like nuts ack or something. I don't know, man, I
guess I guess that's Weirdly, what happened was in game
over man, I was like butt naked, and now they're like,
all right, he'll show his butth hole in it and
absolutely everything. So you do it once, you'll do it again.
Yeah you give you give a mouse a cookie, you
know what I mean? The nookie baby, The pleasures, it
(02:43):
all pleasure arms. So the topic of this episode is
don't quit your day Hey what and what a better
topic to kick it off with the workaholics? Come on,
come on now, come we did we after seven seasons,
we did quit our day job and look at your
(03:05):
day job now they're having to shave your butt hole.
So don't and don't quit your day job is basically
saying like, don't pursue your dreams, right your dream Yeah,
it's a bullshit. It's like what you're sty I remember,
I remember. I mean, my uncle's aren't like that shitty.
But I remember when I first moved to Hollywood and
I was like, I'm going to be an actor. I'm
going to be a comedian, and uh, you know, it's
(03:26):
such an insane thing to say to anyone outside of
like l A, where like they know people in the
entertainment industry it's just seems insane. So everyone in my
life said this to me, and they're like, Okay, I
don't quit your day job, and I'm like, I don't
have Well, that's it's It's also the nicest way to
tell someone you think they suck at something. Yeah, it's
(03:46):
definitely a burn. I don't know if it's a true
piece of advice. I think it's always been a burn
where it's like you hear somebody singing and then you're like, hey,
don't quit your day job. I slam, since this is
the pleasure is ours. I kind of looped it back
to like, I don't know if you've ever met someone
who's like super down on maybe thinking about joining in
(04:07):
porno and being a porno act. I don't have you, guys,
met anyone who's thinking about being super down into porno
specifically that like, have you ever had a friend who
was like truly considering joining the sexual revolution and becoming
a porn star. I had a friend that you guys
know who will go well, I can say his name
is Bernie Lomax because it's not his real name. I
(04:28):
know him, I know that man, but so he for
a for a true moment was going to start producing porno. Well,
so what did you have to talk to your boy
down from the edge or well, here's what's crazy, is
he like he remember him like telling his mom in
front of all of us, and she was like she
was smart. She was like okay, you know, she didn't
say don't quit your j jobs. She said go for it,
(04:49):
and he was like nah, like it kind of it
made him go, I'm this isn't fun anymore. Mom's actually
supporting me. She's supposed to be yelling him. Well, here's
my head shot. So if we were true to the
say or don't quit your day job, would you have
like asked to maybe see like some kind of audition
tape and then been like, yo, bro, you just don't
(05:09):
have the goods to do it, Like maybe maybe don't
quit your day job. I don't think he wanted to
be in the movies. I think he just wanted to
like produce him because he was like, it's funny, but
it's also porno and there's a ton of money on that. Well,
sure time you can get into Yeah. I mean, if
you can get a vein, bro, if you hit a
main vein, you're getting paid all hitting the main vein
(05:31):
dog man man. Yeah, there's definitely money in porno. What, Yeah,
there is money. I bet somebody's making money. I just
don't know if our boy, Bernie Lomax is going to
make a fortune off this endeavor. To me, I'm like,
don't quit your day job. That's what I would say
(05:51):
to him. He didn't have and that would be a burn,
and that would be a burn, and that like to
me and when I was because all these like topics
kind of have to relate back to like sex or
dating or something like that. Right, you know this is
sponsible here, right, but don't quit your Imagine you have
(06:12):
sex with someone and then they look in your eyes
after you're like during having sex or maybe right after
you climax, and then they lock into you and say,
don't quit your day Just what are you in? Important?
Are you saying? No? Just like he's just sex with
somebody and somebody burned you, like right after you made
(06:33):
your weird No, it's not, it's not if like you're really,
how does that for you? How does that feel too?
It's that guy, that guy. I mean, if you're asking
for a positive reinforcement and then that's what she she
offers you and you need to, but you can't just happen.
(06:55):
Oh right, you have to because the whole thing is
like you want to sue your dream job usually right,
it's like you're not. You don't want to be a singer.
You want to be a singer who's paid. Right, So
that's why it don't quit your day job. So if
you're on a porno set, it's your first day and
then you're like, how'd I do? And she goes, don't
quit your day job? Out burn. Well, I don't know, like,
(07:16):
do any of you guys feel like you have some
kind of all star move that would make you a
viable commodity for the porn industry. Like it's a very
very revealing question. Uh yeah, I've got plenty of sort
of trademark moves. I feel like I would have to
be in some kind of a very weird niche market
(07:38):
like Ron Jerry, like some people that are into like
hairsuits or something. Yeah, like funny, like you know, like
shouldn't be in porno kind of a guy. I like that.
I like that I'm a real I'm a real good soaker. Really,
I mean, I don't know if it's my Steed. But
I just I've got a good feeling. I gave a
gray hand job. Dude, I feel like I would sell
(08:01):
what you're talking about. I thought you were asking us
what our moves were. Yeah, move, dude, it's my move
on myself and I have a job. You're certain, are
you guys saying because to me or you can check off? Well,
those are two things I don't know, not if you
(08:22):
come around from behind the guy. Yeah. Man, I'm just saying.
If I had to go in the porn industry and
I had to bet on myself and be the best job,
I think I'd be like a killer, like hand job assassin.
I've seen you play video games, so I've seen you
(08:44):
with the pepper grinder. Holy say when and just say when,
And that's my whole thing, My whole catchphrases say when.
And there's T shirts and my mom one that she
wears to the gym. She's so proud. It's too good.
The peppercracker. He should we like produce a spinoff Workhalics
(09:10):
TV show, But it is a porno absolutely, and are
the characters keep finding themselves in a hardcore pornographic situations?
Should be not quit our day job. Don't quit your job.
I'm in man. I just would like my character to
be replaced with a female that has a mustache, so
you could get into really like cool s. Yeah, female
(09:34):
that has a must like a real mustache. She could
It could be like just glued on or whatever. But
I just think it would add a really funny dynamic
to our already hilarious relationship. I don't disagree the pleasure
(09:54):
our so obviously, this podcast is brought to you by Trojan,
America's number one condom, and specifically this episode, we're talking
ultra Fit. Yeah, for all the different kinds of dicks
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(10:14):
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(10:36):
which personally that's what I love. That's what I think
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That's pretty good. Yeah. They also have Comfort Feel, which
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(10:59):
I've seen your dicker for it, and and uh, I
feel you're gonna want it. You're gonna want some wiggow
room at the top. Did you say tapers outward? Did
you say it tapers with this like taper for smooth
central pleasure? Yeah, yeah, you guessed it. And Blake, you
used to drive a jeep with a big American eagle
on the front of it, right, so what do you like?
You guys are really burying the headline, because my favorite
(11:22):
one is the Freedom Feel. Yeah. It's actually designed with
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(11:44):
I know they're my favorite condom. I've been a Trojan
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tip feel comfort, feel and freedom, feel feel your best,
get yours on. I feel like I threw my info
(12:08):
out at that being you know, the best time at
is is giving hand jobs? Do you guys want to
go on record for what you think you're the best at?
What are we talking about, like the best at? Like
what I don't because I've never given a hand job
or a blow job or anything. But are we talking
about just gay stuff like what we think we would be?
This is this is like in a world where you
(12:29):
have to have a porno move said his was hand jobs,
um mine is dropping him from the top rope. Thank you? Yeah,
I feel like I'll swing in swing breaker. Yeah, broke
my boner? No I never I mean yeah, well yes
I have. I've had to stop and then like that
(12:50):
really hurt. But no, I never had to go to
the hospital and get it. You've bent it out of
shape or whatever been like we gotta pause, Yeah for absolutely.
Do you mean you bent it like he folded it
in half a rock trying to get it on. Yeah, yeah,
but it was like dislocated or what's have you ever
had it where like your finger, like the knuckle kind
of pops out and then you just got to like
(13:11):
kind of pop the knuckle back in. Yeah, Dick located.
That's what I was imagining. Okay, I like that, And
there's what's yours. What would you if you had to
have a secret move man, um, Well, you know it'd
be nipple play. The pleasure is you know, you know
(13:33):
those those You'll watch something and you're like, this is
like a lot of time on the nipples here, move on?
Who is doing this? There's no way it feels that good.
There's you gotta tap in bro nips, rock nips, rock rock.
They've fine. Well, some people have super the way Kyle
(13:57):
is looking at me, he has super super duper sensitive nipples,
which is weird because I've grabbed them for like twenty years.
I'm always like grabbing You're not You're not trying to
make me feel good when you do that. But now,
on accident, I'm making you the pleasure to Jans. If
you put a little bit more effort in it, something
(14:18):
might happen. His last words and then he died dirt.
Since you're claiming um, nipple play as your special move,
is that like do you like turn people out? Like?
Is it like I will make I will make you
love and nothing. I'm fully closed. I'm dressed like a scientist. Yes,
(14:40):
you're doing research, right, I'm doing research on the area
that does the nipple play include like toys? Do you
use props as their feathers? I think it's got to
like syrubs, right, I mean you know, and I'm sure
it's like the years go on. There's like piercing's magnets.
How do they work? Kind of thing? Yeah, what are
the magnets about? Hold on, what's the magnet's about? Mr?
(15:02):
Dr nipple like? Because if they have like the piercing,
you hold like the magnet above it and you can
make the boob kind of follow it. You don't connect them,
don't just have it kind of like I was doing
all kinds of weird experiments over there. All right, So
we got we got for the pleasure. We got the
circus performer over here that's dropping from the top rope.
(15:26):
We got Blake who is just giving hand jobs, evidently
just crushing hand jobs. He's cracking pepper. Yeah, he's cracking pepper.
He's dressed like a waiter. He's just like a sucking
like fancy smock on and Carl is just like very
(15:46):
like you said, it was like very kinky. What did
you say, Like it's totally like mostly shadows. I don't
know what it is. I don't really it's mostly shadows.
It's I play in what you don't see. I'm the
kind of run I'll give you a butt cheek in
the light and then go back in its art house film.
She says, is it in yet or or it's what
(16:08):
are those? What's those pornos where you just see the face?
You know what I mean? You don't see I feel
like I would crush that beautiful You're like a fill
in the blank guy. Let your imagination. I do enjoys.
You're like a cool nineties Cinemax movie. His poor no
name is Phil in the blanks. And I think, uh,
I think if anyone saw us as a professional porn
(16:31):
stars with these cool new nicknames, they might say, don't
quit your day job. Don't quit your day job. Yeah,
don't quit your day job. I mean, have you guys
ever had anyone like say that to you? Because I've
(16:53):
had someone legit say that to me before. I'm sorry,
and I'm sorry. I take it back. You blew me away.
Look at your great success. I remember when I was
nineteen years old, and you guys, remember we were friends
at this point. Uh Minuster's because we hadn't met him yet.
But uh, I was nineteen friend at that camera store
(17:13):
in Orange County and I was selling tripods. Didn't know
anything about tripods. All I knew is they had three legs. Uh,
And uh I got fired. Basically, I got fired because
I drank too much water. And then and then they
got because I was like always leaving my area to
like go get more water. And then the guy was like, hey,
I'm firing you, and I'm like, okay, all right. And
(17:35):
then his daughters, his daughters on water actually, and then
the his daughters who helped him run the business, were like,
don't fire at him. He's a good kid. He just
drinks too much water. You stays very hydrated. And so
he calls me up and he's like, hey, I'm I'm
not going to fire you. I just need you to
stay at your station more and some more tripods. And
(17:57):
then I go, I'm sorry. I think it was a
good thing that you let me go because I have
to concentrate on my comedy. I told him that at
like nineteen and he was like, oh god, don't quit
your day job. And he said that to me, and
I remember thinking, I was just fired from my day job.
You're fucking idiot, you just fired me from my day job.
(18:19):
I can't quit it now. Yeah, yeah, I remember it
being like I remember being like, I didn't catch it
until after the fact. I'm like, yeah, well, I know,
I but I gotta give comedy a shot. And then
I hung up, and then I'm like, tell him our
our friend Austin about that, and and then I was like,
I said, don't quit your day job. And then I
was like, but he just fired me, and uh laughed.
(18:43):
We were pretty stoned. But I think we find this
fucking guy and we have we have Blake fucking jack
him off while I worked the nipples. And then you
fly in from the top rope and just when he
thinks it's over, Kyle creeps in from the shadow those
don't quit your day job, and you go, don't quit
(19:03):
your day job, don't quit job, but hey, hey don't
quit how about how about you don't quit your day job.
That's all said. That's always that's always fun when someone
says something to you and then your retort is the
exact same thing that they said. Don't your day job.
You don't quit your day job? My job? Fine, you
(19:23):
don't quit yours. It's cool when it works too, when
the person's like, oh you want me to quit and
you're like, wow, it worked, yeah right right. Have you
guys ever been fired? Yeah? I got fired from the
cost on Rudeo Drive. That was pretty epic. I just went.
It was like the holiday season. I went home for
a week instead of the three days I told him
I'd be gone. Sorry about it? Yeah, fucking where's the
(19:44):
wiggle room? Sorry? Oh that's it. Don't quit your day job,
get fired from it, get fired from your day getting
fired get like so, yeah, that's pretty and that is
actually good advice. So what do we what? What's a
better phrase? Don't quit your day job? Because I mean
that is it is a slam it. Don't your porno? Well,
(20:06):
when someone starts singing, hey, don't do porno, what if
it's like, don't quit your day job, but you can
film porno at night in your room on like a
like an only fans or something as a side hust better, Yeah,
a little long. Yeah, yeah, that seems right. Don't quit
drop one has legs. Yeah, quit your dream job. Okay,
(20:32):
how about be nice for the kids who are getting
trophies for just participating these days. Well, I mean it's
not a horrible like don't quit your day job, because
some people like, should not quit your day job, Like
(20:53):
if they are going after something and they like, if
you're you want to be a pro baseball player and
you're giving it, you're all, but like you can't throw
a baseball, and you're like, I'm giving it all to
my dream. I'm gonna quit my day job and learn
to throw this baseball. And the guy's thirty seven. You're like, buddy,
you're not You're not going to be a pro baseball player.
Don't quit your day job. It's good advice. I think
(21:15):
that also kind of ties in with the way I
spun It is like you can have your day job
and then at night throw the ball against the wall
a little bit. You know, you can have your day
job and some sort of play on that. There we go.
You can have your day job and eat it too.
You can have a day job and have a side
hustle to get you some money to eat possibly eat
(21:37):
and have a day job and eat your side hustles
up to two of two saints. You're gonna have a
job and eat it too, and eat it. Yeah yeah,
did we just change the world? Oh my god, it
was my horriblesh. It was for pleasures, hours pleasures. Have
(21:59):
we talked about how to end these episodes yet? I
think we just did it. This episode was brought to
you by Trojan, America's number one kind of brand. You
can get any of Trojan's products that were featured in
this episode, like bear Skin, Raw, Ultra Fi, Ultra Thin,
and Delay Spray online or at any major retailer. Feel
(22:19):
your best, get yours on
What's up? This is important community. Guess what? We got
a sick new sponsor, Trojan, America's number one condom brand,
Trojan Man, there are new potmas. I like to say,
I like it, you say it like that. Hot is
this in this episode? This is a bonus. We're giving
them that extra content coming in hot, hot, hot, and
(00:23):
you can hear it here, but guess where you can
also hear it where you can hear it on The
Pleasure is Ours feed and you got to say it
all sexy. The Pleasure is Ours feed, so you know,
check it out. I hope you dig it. The Pleasure
is Ours is brought to you by Trojan, America's number
one kind of brand. Feel your best, get yours on.
(00:49):
What's the show called? The Pleasure is Ours? I think
I know how we're kicking it off. You already know
the pleasure The Pleasure is Ours. We got a new podcast.
(01:11):
This is uh, this is our second We love casting.
Look at us go. The community demanded more and we're
giving it to him. We partnered with Trojan and we've
we're hosting season two of The Pleasure is Ours. And
I know I'm excited. And the Pleasure is Ours Oh yeah,
we're gonna roll this one down all the way to
the serial number. Hunh. I know. I'm excited with Blake
all being nude in this little zoom frame. I see. Yeah,
(01:34):
you guys have your shirts off. Yes, I think one
rule about doing the pleasure is ours is I'm gonna
do it topless. Take the bottoms off. I want to
see some nets. Take the bottoms off. Let's make it interesting.
Come on first, feel free to release the twins. We
were talking about your bush. It is pretty serious right now,
you were saying, yes, yes, I haven't. I haven't trimmed
in a while. It's been it's been a minute. Oh.
(01:55):
I actually for the Righteous Gemstones. Just last week, I
had to shave bear shave. I shaved my pubes. I
think that was the first time I've ever done that
in my life besides an accidental you left it like
a razor. No, no, no, no, no, I'm completely I
even I even shave my butt hole hair just because. Yeah. Well,
(02:18):
I was like, I was like, they might they're shooting
like from behind, and I think they might see some
like nuts ack or something. I don't know, man, I
guess I guess that's Weirdly, what happened was in game
over man, I was like butt naked, and now they're like,
all right, he'll show his butth hole in it and
absolutely everything. So you do it once, you'll do it again.
Yeah you give you give a mouse a cookie, you
know what I mean? The nookie baby, The pleasures, it
(02:43):
all pleasure arms. So the topic of this episode is
don't quit your day Hey what and what a better
topic to kick it off with the workaholics? Come on,
come on now, come we did we after seven seasons,
we did quit our day job and look at your
(03:05):
day job now they're having to shave your butt hole.
So don't and don't quit your day job is basically
saying like, don't pursue your dreams, right your dream Yeah,
it's a bullshit. It's like what you're sty I remember,
I remember. I mean, my uncle's aren't like that shitty.
But I remember when I first moved to Hollywood and
I was like, I'm going to be an actor. I'm
going to be a comedian, and uh, you know, it's
(03:26):
such an insane thing to say to anyone outside of
like l A, where like they know people in the
entertainment industry it's just seems insane. So everyone in my
life said this to me, and they're like, Okay, I
don't quit your day job, and I'm like, I don't
have Well, that's it's It's also the nicest way to
tell someone you think they suck at something. Yeah, it's
(03:46):
definitely a burn. I don't know if it's a true
piece of advice. I think it's always been a burn
where it's like you hear somebody singing and then you're like, hey,
don't quit your day job. I slam, since this is
the pleasure is ours. I kind of looped it back
to like, I don't know if you've ever met someone
who's like super down on maybe thinking about joining in
(04:07):
porno and being a porno act. I don't have you, guys,
met anyone who's thinking about being super down into porno
specifically that like, have you ever had a friend who
was like truly considering joining the sexual revolution and becoming
a porn star. I had a friend that you guys
know who will go well, I can say his name
is Bernie Lomax because it's not his real name. I
(04:28):
know him, I know that man, but so he for
a for a true moment was going to start producing porno. Well,
so what did you have to talk to your boy
down from the edge or well, here's what's crazy, is
he like he remember him like telling his mom in
front of all of us, and she was like she
was smart. She was like okay, you know, she didn't
say don't quit your j jobs. She said go for it,
(04:49):
and he was like nah, like it kind of it
made him go, I'm this isn't fun anymore. Mom's actually
supporting me. She's supposed to be yelling him. Well, here's
my head shot. So if we were true to the
say or don't quit your day job, would you have
like asked to maybe see like some kind of audition
tape and then been like, yo, bro, you just don't
(05:09):
have the goods to do it, Like maybe maybe don't
quit your day job. I don't think he wanted to
be in the movies. I think he just wanted to
like produce him because he was like, it's funny, but
it's also porno and there's a ton of money on that. Well,
sure time you can get into Yeah. I mean, if
you can get a vein, bro, if you hit a
main vein, you're getting paid all hitting the main vein
(05:31):
dog man man. Yeah, there's definitely money in porno. What, Yeah,
there is money. I bet somebody's making money. I just
don't know if our boy, Bernie Lomax is going to
make a fortune off this endeavor. To me, I'm like,
don't quit your day job. That's what I would say
(05:51):
to him. He didn't have and that would be a burn,
and that would be a burn, and that like to
me and when I was because all these like topics
kind of have to relate back to like sex or
dating or something like that. Right, you know this is
sponsible here, right, but don't quit your Imagine you have
(06:12):
sex with someone and then they look in your eyes
after you're like during having sex or maybe right after
you climax, and then they lock into you and say,
don't quit your day Just what are you in? Important?
Are you saying? No? Just like he's just sex with
somebody and somebody burned you, like right after you made
(06:33):
your weird No, it's not, it's not if like you're really,
how does that for you? How does that feel too?
It's that guy, that guy. I mean, if you're asking
for a positive reinforcement and then that's what she she
offers you and you need to, but you can't just happen.
(06:55):
Oh right, you have to because the whole thing is
like you want to sue your dream job usually right,
it's like you're not. You don't want to be a singer.
You want to be a singer who's paid. Right, So
that's why it don't quit your day job. So if
you're on a porno set, it's your first day and
then you're like, how'd I do? And she goes, don't
quit your day job? Out burn. Well, I don't know, like,
(07:16):
do any of you guys feel like you have some
kind of all star move that would make you a
viable commodity for the porn industry. Like it's a very
very revealing question. Uh yeah, I've got plenty of sort
of trademark moves. I feel like I would have to
be in some kind of a very weird niche market
(07:38):
like Ron Jerry, like some people that are into like
hairsuits or something. Yeah, like funny, like you know, like
shouldn't be in porno kind of a guy. I like that.
I like that I'm a real I'm a real good soaker. Really,
I mean, I don't know if it's my Steed. But
I just I've got a good feeling. I gave a
gray hand job. Dude, I feel like I would sell
(08:01):
what you're talking about. I thought you were asking us
what our moves were. Yeah, move, dude, it's my move
on myself and I have a job. You're certain, are
you guys saying because to me or you can check off? Well,
those are two things I don't know, not if you
(08:22):
come around from behind the guy. Yeah. Man, I'm just saying.
If I had to go in the porn industry and
I had to bet on myself and be the best job,
I think I'd be like a killer, like hand job assassin.
I've seen you play video games, so I've seen you
(08:44):
with the pepper grinder. Holy say when and just say when,
And that's my whole thing, My whole catchphrases say when.
And there's T shirts and my mom one that she
wears to the gym. She's so proud. It's too good.
The peppercracker. He should we like produce a spinoff Workhalics
(09:10):
TV show, But it is a porno absolutely, and are
the characters keep finding themselves in a hardcore pornographic situations?
Should be not quit our day job. Don't quit your job.
I'm in man. I just would like my character to
be replaced with a female that has a mustache, so
you could get into really like cool s. Yeah, female
(09:34):
that has a must like a real mustache. She could
It could be like just glued on or whatever. But
I just think it would add a really funny dynamic
to our already hilarious relationship. I don't disagree the pleasure
(09:54):
our so obviously, this podcast is brought to you by Trojan,
America's number one condom, and specifically this episode, we're talking
ultra Fit. Yeah, for all the different kinds of dicks
out there, there's a lot. Turns out, there's lots of
(10:14):
different shapes and sizes of of dicks, you know, the
summer long and skinny, summer short and fat, and Trojan
has our has our backs. They do, Thank God, our
Trojan has our dicks. It's actually kind of cool this
line of condoms at the hand, it's called ultra Fit.
There's four different types. There's bare feel, which is designed
to make it feel like it's not even there um,
(10:36):
which personally that's what I love. That's what I think
a lot. I think that's gonna be a big hit
for them, right, Well, what about Sensitive tip feel. You
know it's designed to focus intensity and stimulation at the tip.
That's pretty good. Yeah. They also have Comfort Feel, which
is designed with like a slight taper for smooth sensual pleasure.
I think that, uh that will work for your dick.
(10:59):
I've seen your dicker for it, and and uh, I
feel you're gonna want it. You're gonna want some wiggow
room at the top. Did you say tapers outward? Did
you say it tapers with this like taper for smooth
central pleasure? Yeah, yeah, you guessed it. And Blake, you
used to drive a jeep with a big American eagle
on the front of it, right, so what do you like?
You guys are really burying the headline, because my favorite
(11:22):
one is the Freedom Feel. Yeah. It's actually designed with
less restriction for uninhibited sensation, which you know I'm all about.
I'd like to just the freedom flag fly and flag
is my dick with a condom on it. As always,
Trojan is triple tested and trusted for over one years.
(11:44):
I know they're my favorite condom. I've been a Trojan
man for many years, dude, I've had so many, so
many awesome experiences, so nice ultro fit bear Field sensitive
tip feel comfort, feel and freedom, feel feel your best,
get yours on. I feel like I threw my info
(12:08):
out at that being you know, the best time at
is is giving hand jobs? Do you guys want to
go on record for what you think you're the best at?
What are we talking about, like the best at? Like
what I don't because I've never given a hand job
or a blow job or anything. But are we talking
about just gay stuff like what we think we would be?
This is this is like in a world where you
(12:29):
have to have a porno move said his was hand jobs,
um mine is dropping him from the top rope. Thank you? Yeah,
I feel like I'll swing in swing breaker. Yeah, broke
my boner? No I never I mean yeah, well yes
I have. I've had to stop and then like that
(12:50):
really hurt. But no, I never had to go to
the hospital and get it. You've bent it out of
shape or whatever been like we gotta pause, Yeah for absolutely.
Do you mean you bent it like he folded it
in half a rock trying to get it on. Yeah, yeah,
but it was like dislocated or what's have you ever
had it where like your finger, like the knuckle kind
of pops out and then you just got to like
(13:11):
kind of pop the knuckle back in. Yeah, Dick located.
That's what I was imagining. Okay, I like that, And
there's what's yours. What would you if you had to
have a secret move man, um, Well, you know it'd
be nipple play. The pleasure is you know, you know
(13:33):
those those You'll watch something and you're like, this is
like a lot of time on the nipples here, move on?
Who is doing this? There's no way it feels that good.
There's you gotta tap in bro nips, rock nips, rock rock.
They've fine. Well, some people have super the way Kyle
(13:57):
is looking at me, he has super super duper sensitive nipples,
which is weird because I've grabbed them for like twenty years.
I'm always like grabbing You're not You're not trying to
make me feel good when you do that. But now,
on accident, I'm making you the pleasure to Jans. If
you put a little bit more effort in it, something
(14:18):
might happen. His last words and then he died dirt.
Since you're claiming um, nipple play as your special move,
is that like do you like turn people out? Like?
Is it like I will make I will make you
love and nothing. I'm fully closed. I'm dressed like a scientist. Yes,
(14:40):
you're doing research, right, I'm doing research on the area
that does the nipple play include like toys? Do you
use props as their feathers? I think it's got to
like syrubs, right, I mean you know, and I'm sure
it's like the years go on. There's like piercing's magnets.
How do they work? Kind of thing? Yeah, what are
the magnets about? Hold on, what's the magnet's about? Mr?
(15:02):
Dr nipple like? Because if they have like the piercing,
you hold like the magnet above it and you can
make the boob kind of follow it. You don't connect them,
don't just have it kind of like I was doing
all kinds of weird experiments over there. All right, So
we got we got for the pleasure. We got the
circus performer over here that's dropping from the top rope.
(15:26):
We got Blake who is just giving hand jobs, evidently
just crushing hand jobs. He's cracking pepper. Yeah, he's cracking pepper.
He's dressed like a waiter. He's just like a sucking
like fancy smock on and Carl is just like very
(15:46):
like you said, it was like very kinky. What did
you say, Like it's totally like mostly shadows. I don't
know what it is. I don't really it's mostly shadows.
It's I play in what you don't see. I'm the
kind of run I'll give you a butt cheek in
the light and then go back in its art house film.
She says, is it in yet or or it's what
(16:08):
are those? What's those pornos where you just see the face?
You know what I mean? You don't see I feel
like I would crush that beautiful You're like a fill
in the blank guy. Let your imagination. I do enjoys.
You're like a cool nineties Cinemax movie. His poor no
name is Phil in the blanks. And I think, uh,
I think if anyone saw us as a professional porn
(16:31):
stars with these cool new nicknames, they might say, don't
quit your day job. Don't quit your day job. Yeah,
don't quit your day job. I mean, have you guys
ever had anyone like say that to you? Because I've
(16:53):
had someone legit say that to me before. I'm sorry,
and I'm sorry. I take it back. You blew me away.
Look at your great success. I remember when I was
nineteen years old, and you guys, remember we were friends
at this point. Uh Minuster's because we hadn't met him yet.
But uh, I was nineteen friend at that camera store
(17:13):
in Orange County and I was selling tripods. Didn't know
anything about tripods. All I knew is they had three legs. Uh,
And uh I got fired. Basically, I got fired because
I drank too much water. And then and then they
got because I was like always leaving my area to
like go get more water. And then the guy was like, hey,
I'm firing you, and I'm like, okay, all right. And
(17:35):
then his daughters, his daughters on water actually, and then
the his daughters who helped him run the business, were like,
don't fire at him. He's a good kid. He just
drinks too much water. You stays very hydrated. And so
he calls me up and he's like, hey, I'm I'm
not going to fire you. I just need you to
stay at your station more and some more tripods. And
(17:57):
then I go, I'm sorry. I think it was a
good thing that you let me go because I have
to concentrate on my comedy. I told him that at
like nineteen and he was like, oh god, don't quit
your day job. And he said that to me, and
I remember thinking, I was just fired from my day job.
You're fucking idiot, you just fired me from my day job.
(18:19):
I can't quit it now. Yeah, yeah, I remember it
being like I remember being like, I didn't catch it
until after the fact. I'm like, yeah, well, I know,
I but I gotta give comedy a shot. And then
I hung up, and then I'm like, tell him our
our friend Austin about that, and and then I was like,
I said, don't quit your day job. And then I
was like, but he just fired me, and uh laughed.
(18:43):
We were pretty stoned. But I think we find this
fucking guy and we have we have Blake fucking jack
him off while I worked the nipples. And then you
fly in from the top rope and just when he
thinks it's over, Kyle creeps in from the shadow those
don't quit your day job, and you go, don't quit
(19:03):
your day job, don't quit job, but hey, hey don't
quit how about how about you don't quit your day job.
That's all said. That's always that's always fun when someone
says something to you and then your retort is the
exact same thing that they said. Don't your day job.
You don't quit your day job? My job? Fine, you
(19:23):
don't quit yours. It's cool when it works too, when
the person's like, oh you want me to quit and
you're like, wow, it worked, yeah right right. Have you
guys ever been fired? Yeah? I got fired from the
cost on Rudeo Drive. That was pretty epic. I just went.
It was like the holiday season. I went home for
a week instead of the three days I told him
I'd be gone. Sorry about it? Yeah, fucking where's the
(19:44):
wiggle room? Sorry? Oh that's it. Don't quit your day job,
get fired from it, get fired from your day getting
fired get like so, yeah, that's pretty and that is
actually good advice. So what do we what? What's a
better phrase? Don't quit your day job? Because I mean
that is it is a slam it. Don't your porno? Well,
(20:06):
when someone starts singing, hey, don't do porno, what if
it's like, don't quit your day job, but you can
film porno at night in your room on like a
like an only fans or something as a side hust better, Yeah,
a little long. Yeah, yeah, that seems right. Don't quit
drop one has legs. Yeah, quit your dream job. Okay,
(20:32):
how about be nice for the kids who are getting
trophies for just participating these days. Well, I mean it's
not a horrible like don't quit your day job, because
some people like, should not quit your day job, Like
(20:53):
if they are going after something and they like, if
you're you want to be a pro baseball player and
you're giving it, you're all, but like you can't throw
a baseball, and you're like, I'm giving it all to
my dream. I'm gonna quit my day job and learn
to throw this baseball. And the guy's thirty seven. You're like, buddy,
you're not You're not going to be a pro baseball player.
Don't quit your day job. It's good advice. I think
(21:15):
that also kind of ties in with the way I
spun It is like you can have your day job
and then at night throw the ball against the wall
a little bit. You know, you can have your day
job and some sort of play on that. There we go.
You can have your day job and eat it too.
You can have a day job and have a side
hustle to get you some money to eat possibly eat
(21:37):
and have a day job and eat your side hustles
up to two of two saints. You're gonna have a
job and eat it too, and eat it. Yeah yeah,
did we just change the world? Oh my god, it
was my horriblesh. It was for pleasures, hours pleasures. Have
(21:59):
we talked about how to end these episodes yet? I
think we just did it. This episode was brought to
you by Trojan, America's number one kind of brand. You
can get any of Trojan's products that were featured in
this episode, like bear Skin, Raw, Ultra Fi, Ultra Thin,
and Delay Spray online or at any major retailer. Feel
(22:19):
your best, get yours on
Hosts And Creators
Anders Holm
Kyle Newacheck
Adam Devine
Blake Anderson
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