October 10, 2024 • 10 mins
Daniel weathers Hurricane Milton by checking in on his mom and, more importantly, the family pier on Merritt Island.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Casha.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Hey guys, it's me Dan Tosh and this sadly is
a true emergency pod. Eddie hit the sirens. The sirens
should sound more like like an alarm to get to
higher ground or something.
Speaker 1 (00:31):
I think it's pretty good. It's not like the last part.
It's not.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
When you can't change the alarm sound mid alarm, then
it sounds like an old car alarm from the early nineties.
Here's what we're doing, guys. It's Wednesday, October ninth, ninth ninth.
It is the day before Hurricane Milton destroys my family.
(00:57):
Oh man, if ever on a emergency pod was actually necessary.
I'm doing this so that all the people that are
reaching out to me can just watch this. Uh, instead
of me replying to everyone, will my family evacuate? My
in laws have all evacuated. They live over in Sarasota.
(01:19):
Now my family, they all live on Merritt Island. They
would they would never evacuate. You're not gonna call my
parents pussies. No, there there couldn't be a storm surge
big enough to get them out, as you were called
the last time. Uh, they had a storm surge there.
They lost their peer and my sister was was out
(01:40):
in the in the waters trying to save her peer,
and then they rebuilt it by hand, my father who's
way too old to be doing it. Uh, you know,
no permits or experience in building a peer. They rebuilt
their entire pier. So I'm sure they're they're terrified that
they're gonna lose their peer again.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
You know.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
And fairness to my folks, you know, their explanation is
logical of why they never like to evacuate, because what
happens is the storm is bad, but it's only bad
for a bit. Then getting back to your place, a
lot of times roads are closed and you can't get
back for days, and that's when a lot of the
damage happens. So that's their mentality is well, if I
(02:24):
was there, I could pick things up and it wouldn't
get destroyed, you know, like sitting water now, I you know,
grew up in a family that never evacuated. And also
the coverage has changed. Now are you watching the weather channel?
Is this only interesting to me the storms or do
(02:44):
you guys tune into it?
Speaker 1 (02:46):
I'm watching too.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Well, Eddie's got family in the area. Did your folks evacuate, Eddies?
Speaker 3 (02:51):
They did. They went to dustin, Florida.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
They went to Dustin, Okay. So your family's a bunch
of cowards too. So I'm watching the Weather Channel. Well,
I keep it on. I like the bad graphics. It
reminds me, honestly of Tosh point zero when I see
them standing there on the green screen with the fakeness
all around that. A lot of people know this about
Byron Allen, a comedian. He bought the Weather Channel I
(03:14):
don't know, fifty years ago for seven dollars. Who knew
at the time other than Byron Allen that climate change,
which would make storms more fierce, would now be such
a hot commodity because I go to the Weather Channel
almost exclusively for my information when it comes to tracking hurricanes.
(03:37):
Here's my problem with the Weather Channel. You don't know
when a storm's coming, right, So all those ad dollars
are sold throughout the year. Then a storm comes all
of a sudden, people start watching the Weather Channel. But
guess what, they still got the horrible ads, the cheap
ads running. It's like there needs to be premium ads.
(03:58):
Oh there's a hurricane, people are gonna start watching this channel. Now,
let's have real companies advertised, because the ads that are
on there right now are just horribly embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
You got your sleep apnea stuff.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
Sure, there's actually a commercial I've been seeing on the
Weather Channel right now. It's a boner pill for teenagers. Literally, like,
what is this? I couldn't think of a medication less needed.
My point is, I think they need to come up with, oh,
there's a storm. Okay, all of your ads get booted,
(04:31):
and now let's have some real sponsors come in.
Speaker 3 (04:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
And that's the thing with the coverage on the Weather Channel.
You know, with a hurricane, you know, they make a
meal out of it. As soon as a little low
pressure starts to form, it turns into a tropical storm. Oh,
here we go, let's name it. And then she jumps
up to a Cat five. Oh jackpot, that's a Ratians bonanza.
But meanwhile, in California, the last earthquake we had a
(04:54):
few weeks ago, in the middle of it, my phone
gave me a warning halfway through. I'm like, oh, that's helpful.
There's no money in earthquakes. People always say, oh, you're California,
You're gonna fall into the ocean. I've been hearing that
since I was five years old. Guess what still here?
What's gonna happen?
Speaker 1 (05:15):
First?
Speaker 2 (05:15):
Is California gonna fall into the ocean? Or is Florida
gonna be underwater? These are things I've been here in
my whole life and they haven't happened yet. So why
not live there and enjoy it? And if it happens
to fall in the ocean, hopefully I'm on the road.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
Mm hm. You know, I'll miss my wife, but damn it,
she can be replaced. You gotta move on, you have to.
She would want me.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
To find happiness with someone younger and more attractive. You
know what, though, I do need to check in. I
need to check in to make sure that that my
mother is safe and that their peer is intact. Let's see,
I'm got a real report here. Yeah, unbelievable. Well, I
(06:17):
hate to do this, but it's an emergency pod. So
I think my father would understand.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
Hello, tell mom to pick up her phone.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
Pick up your phone? Okay, that all?
Speaker 1 (06:41):
Yeah, I'll call right back.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
I'm working on a puzzle.
Speaker 2 (06:56):
I have unbelievable I'm worried sick about you guys. I
need to get a full port. What's the current wind speed?
Speaker 1 (07:02):
There. I don't know is it is it blowing?
Speaker 3 (07:08):
It's raining, it's raining.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
Are you worried about a storm surge?
Speaker 3 (07:13):
No?
Speaker 1 (07:14):
I heard you could expect up to puzzle.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
I heard you could expect up to three to five
feet in your area for the storm surge.
Speaker 3 (07:22):
Oh please, we're not on the ocean. That's that's Tampa.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
No, no, Tampa. Can I expect nine to fifteen feet?
Speaker 3 (07:31):
They don't know? We'll see.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
Nah. Are you worried about your peer?
Speaker 3 (07:38):
No?
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Would you?
Speaker 3 (07:39):
I think it's it's stronger now than it was before.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Would you rebuild it again if you lost it?
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Mike said he's going to work tomorrow. He go on
his Grandpa out there fixing the doc tomorrow. It'll be fine.
I do feel bad for people that are alone. If
I were by myself, I would pray not like that?
Speaker 1 (07:59):
Do you guys? Do you and Dad want to fly
out here?
Speaker 2 (08:02):
No?
Speaker 3 (08:03):
No, we kept Missy right here in the next not
with us.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
But I know I get it. Well, how many how
many piece puzzle are you working on?
Speaker 3 (08:14):
You know this is only three hundred because I don't
have room for a five hundred. And now Dad's trying
to eat a bowl of soup, and he's pushing my
puzzle pieces all around.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
All right, have you have you already got the outline done?
Speaker 3 (08:31):
Oh yeah, I'm on the inside.
Speaker 1 (08:33):
Nice. All right, Well send me a photo of that.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
I'll show it to you. Yeah, all right, I like
to do puzzles.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
All right, that's good information. I'll get you a puzzle.
All right. Well, enjoy your storm.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
Okay, we're waiting. Okay, bye bye.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
You shouldn't say I love you back. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:52):
How in the world my mom not going to answer
the phone because she's working on a puzzle.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
It's almost like it's not even it's not even a
hurricane there for.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
That couldn't care less about a storm. That's interesting's working
on now, you say, Daniel, can't you put your parents
up in a place where they have enough space to
do a five hundred piece puzzle? No, my parents, they
live and I'm pretty sure it's three hundred square foot
(09:21):
little guest house on my sister's property, and they just
couldn't be happier. Just oh, we have a tiny little table,
Dan's eating soup. Can't can't get a bigger puzzle. It's
just nice knowing that their life is exactly what I
always think it's gonna be.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
All right.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
Well, I you know, I hope, I hope they're right.
I hope the storm spares most people. And for those
people that are alone out there in the storm, head
on over to my parents' house. They'll they'll, they'll invite
you in. They'll do the Christian thing.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
M m.
Speaker 1 (10:04):
H eddie hit the sirens.
Speaker 3 (10:32):
Now what now.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
That sounds like I'm like, you're starting to change something.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
It's like a return to normal life.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
What's that's awful?
Speaker 2 (10:42):
Well, we'll put some we'll put some different ones over that,
so it sounds like you did something good, all right.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
See
Casha.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
Hey guys, it's me Dan Tosh and this sadly is
a true emergency pod. Eddie hit the sirens. The sirens
should sound more like like an alarm to get to
higher ground or something.
Speaker 1 (00:31):
I think it's pretty good. It's not like the last part.
It's not.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
When you can't change the alarm sound mid alarm, then
it sounds like an old car alarm from the early nineties.
Here's what we're doing, guys. It's Wednesday, October ninth, ninth ninth.
It is the day before Hurricane Milton destroys my family.
(00:57):
Oh man, if ever on a emergency pod was actually necessary.
I'm doing this so that all the people that are
reaching out to me can just watch this. Uh, instead
of me replying to everyone, will my family evacuate? My
in laws have all evacuated. They live over in Sarasota.
(01:19):
Now my family, they all live on Merritt Island. They
would they would never evacuate. You're not gonna call my
parents pussies. No, there there couldn't be a storm surge
big enough to get them out, as you were called
the last time. Uh, they had a storm surge there.
They lost their peer and my sister was was out
(01:40):
in the in the waters trying to save her peer,
and then they rebuilt it by hand, my father who's
way too old to be doing it. Uh, you know,
no permits or experience in building a peer. They rebuilt
their entire pier. So I'm sure they're they're terrified that
they're gonna lose their peer again.
Speaker 1 (02:01):
You know.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
And fairness to my folks, you know, their explanation is
logical of why they never like to evacuate, because what
happens is the storm is bad, but it's only bad
for a bit. Then getting back to your place, a
lot of times roads are closed and you can't get
back for days, and that's when a lot of the
damage happens. So that's their mentality is well, if I
(02:24):
was there, I could pick things up and it wouldn't
get destroyed, you know, like sitting water now, I you know,
grew up in a family that never evacuated. And also
the coverage has changed. Now are you watching the weather channel?
Is this only interesting to me the storms or do
(02:44):
you guys tune into it?
Speaker 1 (02:46):
I'm watching too.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
Well, Eddie's got family in the area. Did your folks evacuate, Eddies?
Speaker 3 (02:51):
They did. They went to dustin, Florida.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
They went to Dustin, Okay. So your family's a bunch
of cowards too. So I'm watching the Weather Channel. Well,
I keep it on. I like the bad graphics. It
reminds me, honestly of Tosh point zero when I see
them standing there on the green screen with the fakeness
all around that. A lot of people know this about
Byron Allen, a comedian. He bought the Weather Channel I
(03:14):
don't know, fifty years ago for seven dollars. Who knew
at the time other than Byron Allen that climate change,
which would make storms more fierce, would now be such
a hot commodity because I go to the Weather Channel
almost exclusively for my information when it comes to tracking hurricanes.
(03:37):
Here's my problem with the Weather Channel. You don't know
when a storm's coming, right, So all those ad dollars
are sold throughout the year. Then a storm comes all
of a sudden, people start watching the Weather Channel. But
guess what, they still got the horrible ads, the cheap
ads running. It's like there needs to be premium ads.
(03:58):
Oh there's a hurricane, people are gonna start watching this channel. Now,
let's have real companies advertised, because the ads that are
on there right now are just horribly embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
You got your sleep apnea stuff.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
Sure, there's actually a commercial I've been seeing on the
Weather Channel right now. It's a boner pill for teenagers. Literally, like,
what is this? I couldn't think of a medication less needed.
My point is, I think they need to come up with, oh,
there's a storm. Okay, all of your ads get booted,
(04:31):
and now let's have some real sponsors come in.
Speaker 3 (04:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
And that's the thing with the coverage on the Weather Channel.
You know, with a hurricane, you know, they make a
meal out of it. As soon as a little low
pressure starts to form, it turns into a tropical storm. Oh,
here we go, let's name it. And then she jumps
up to a Cat five. Oh jackpot, that's a Ratians bonanza.
But meanwhile, in California, the last earthquake we had a
(04:54):
few weeks ago, in the middle of it, my phone
gave me a warning halfway through. I'm like, oh, that's helpful.
There's no money in earthquakes. People always say, oh, you're California,
You're gonna fall into the ocean. I've been hearing that
since I was five years old. Guess what still here?
What's gonna happen?
Speaker 1 (05:15):
First?
Speaker 2 (05:15):
Is California gonna fall into the ocean? Or is Florida
gonna be underwater? These are things I've been here in
my whole life and they haven't happened yet. So why
not live there and enjoy it? And if it happens
to fall in the ocean, hopefully I'm on the road.
Speaker 1 (05:32):
Mm hm. You know, I'll miss my wife, but damn it,
she can be replaced. You gotta move on, you have to.
She would want me.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
To find happiness with someone younger and more attractive. You
know what, though, I do need to check in. I
need to check in to make sure that that my
mother is safe and that their peer is intact. Let's see,
I'm got a real report here. Yeah, unbelievable. Well, I
(06:17):
hate to do this, but it's an emergency pod. So
I think my father would understand.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
Hello, tell mom to pick up her phone.
Speaker 3 (06:37):
Pick up your phone? Okay, that all?
Speaker 1 (06:41):
Yeah, I'll call right back.
Speaker 3 (06:53):
I'm working on a puzzle.
Speaker 2 (06:56):
I have unbelievable I'm worried sick about you guys. I
need to get a full port. What's the current wind speed?
Speaker 1 (07:02):
There. I don't know is it is it blowing?
Speaker 3 (07:08):
It's raining, it's raining.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
Are you worried about a storm surge?
Speaker 3 (07:13):
No?
Speaker 1 (07:14):
I heard you could expect up to puzzle.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
I heard you could expect up to three to five
feet in your area for the storm surge.
Speaker 3 (07:22):
Oh please, we're not on the ocean. That's that's Tampa.
Speaker 1 (07:27):
No, no, Tampa. Can I expect nine to fifteen feet?
Speaker 3 (07:31):
They don't know? We'll see.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
Nah. Are you worried about your peer?
Speaker 3 (07:38):
No?
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Would you?
Speaker 3 (07:39):
I think it's it's stronger now than it was before.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Would you rebuild it again if you lost it?
Speaker 3 (07:45):
Mike said he's going to work tomorrow. He go on
his Grandpa out there fixing the doc tomorrow. It'll be fine.
I do feel bad for people that are alone. If
I were by myself, I would pray not like that?
Speaker 1 (07:59):
Do you guys? Do you and Dad want to fly
out here?
Speaker 2 (08:02):
No?
Speaker 3 (08:03):
No, we kept Missy right here in the next not
with us.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
But I know I get it. Well, how many how
many piece puzzle are you working on?
Speaker 3 (08:14):
You know this is only three hundred because I don't
have room for a five hundred. And now Dad's trying
to eat a bowl of soup, and he's pushing my
puzzle pieces all around.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
All right, have you have you already got the outline done?
Speaker 3 (08:31):
Oh yeah, I'm on the inside.
Speaker 1 (08:33):
Nice. All right, Well send me a photo of that.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
I'll show it to you. Yeah, all right, I like
to do puzzles.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
All right, that's good information. I'll get you a puzzle.
All right. Well, enjoy your storm.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
Okay, we're waiting. Okay, bye bye.
Speaker 1 (08:48):
You shouldn't say I love you back. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:52):
How in the world my mom not going to answer
the phone because she's working on a puzzle.
Speaker 1 (08:56):
It's almost like it's not even it's not even a
hurricane there for.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
That couldn't care less about a storm. That's interesting's working
on now, you say, Daniel, can't you put your parents
up in a place where they have enough space to
do a five hundred piece puzzle? No, my parents, they
live and I'm pretty sure it's three hundred square foot
(09:21):
little guest house on my sister's property, and they just
couldn't be happier. Just oh, we have a tiny little table,
Dan's eating soup. Can't can't get a bigger puzzle. It's
just nice knowing that their life is exactly what I
always think it's gonna be.
Speaker 1 (09:42):
All right.
Speaker 2 (09:43):
Well, I you know, I hope, I hope they're right.
I hope the storm spares most people. And for those
people that are alone out there in the storm, head
on over to my parents' house. They'll they'll, they'll invite
you in. They'll do the Christian thing.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
M m.
Speaker 1 (10:04):
H eddie hit the sirens.
Speaker 3 (10:32):
Now what now.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
That sounds like I'm like, you're starting to change something.
Speaker 3 (10:38):
It's like a return to normal life.
Speaker 1 (10:40):
What's that's awful?
Speaker 2 (10:42):
Well, we'll put some we'll put some different ones over that,
so it sounds like you did something good, all right.
Speaker 1 (10:47):
See
Host
Daniel Tosh
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