My Builder - Sergio Ortiz

Daniel sits down with architect and home builder Sergio Ortiz to talk about growing up in Spain, building Daniel’s house twice, and surfing when he should be at work.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Everyone who stayed behind during the Woesley fire saved their house.
I couldn't because I was in Vegas doing a charity show.
What was your excuse for not saving my house? I
got scared? Cash Show Cash sho Tosh Show Show. Welcome

(00:23):
to Tosh Show, Eddie. How are you? I'm doing good?
My son's here? Hit him with a hoodie? Who? He's
not here? We just recorded that. Whenever I'm out in
a crowded area, I'll just say to my son, just
real quiet. I whispered to him, I say, hey, hit
him with the hoodie who? And he'll just scream and
it just makes me laugh. Usually makes people laugh around us.

(00:45):
So now I'm gonna do it on the show. I'm
gonna start using it. Hit him again. Oh guess what what?
I was going in the bathroom the other day. Okay,
this is not a poop story, so calm down. I
was going in the bathroom and I found a tick
crawling around on my waistline. H yeah, a real tick.

(01:08):
And I'm like it hadn't burrowed in now. I noticed.
A few weeks ago, I went on a little rant
about lime disease and how they have to be in
you for thirty six hours, and people told me I
was way off. Those ticks, those deer ticks can be
so tiny that you don't even notice that they're on you.
You don't feel it or anything like that that I expect.

(01:29):
This tick is what I'm familiar with, which is basically
a dog tick, and they don't I looked it up.
They don't carry lime disease, but they if they bite
you and start going in, you're gonna feel it. Okay,
that's when you take a matchhead and touch them on
the button make them back up. I don't know how
it works anyway. I had a tick crawling around on me.

(01:52):
That's Carl's fault. I think they live on the I
got a lot of rabbits on the property. They carry
a lot of ticks, is what I'm told. Oh, well,
not a big thing. No, I don't think it's a
big thing. I mean it could be. Listen, I'm living
on a farm.

Speaker 2 (02:07):
You got a farm going on over there.

Speaker 1 (02:08):
Yeah. I guess what what, I'm gonna start working out?
I think? I think I am ok. But here's I know.
People look at me and they say that guy what
he doesn't need to work out his body? Looks perfect, handsome,
well just chiseled. But here's the problem. I've been driving

(02:31):
recently and I've been feeling my stomach and tits shaking
in the car. You have a ride on a road
that's got like like a bump every few seconds, and
and then all of a sudden, you're just like You're
just like, oh, I'm just I'm just jiggling while I'm driving.
This is this is making me feel really like, it's

(02:54):
making me feel bad about myself. Yeah, I was just like, no,
I'm not talking about rum. I'm talking just this natural,
uneven pavement that's making me shake while I'm driving, and
I'm and I'm grossed out by myself. I'm like, I
gotta tighten this all up. So I'm gonna give it

(03:14):
a shot right now. I'm gonna try to just eat
less and uh play more like what a lot of
times when I uh play with my kids, I kind
of facilitate the games. And I think now I'm gonna
get myself more involved. I'm gonna physically get involved. Normally
if they're like kicking a ball, you know, I don't

(03:36):
I don't really hustle. I think I'm gonna start hustling
and see if I can stop my tits and stomach
from shaking while I'm driving over a bridge. A bridge
is where you get those seams in the road and
you're like, oh, and when you feel it, you're you're like, oh,
that's not that's that's new. I don't like it. Speaking

(03:59):
of dad bods, my buddy's on the show today. My
favorite Spaniard this is. Let me tell you something about
today's guest. This guy has been in my life for
eight years, but like every day for eight years, and
my wife hated it. She was she couldn't stand how

(04:21):
much how much time I spent with him. All right, listen,
the heart wants what the heart wants.

Speaker 2 (04:28):
Enjoy Pasha, my guest today has built my home in
Malibu twice because the first one burned down.

Speaker 1 (04:39):
He's a surfer, a builder, an architect, and my favorite
Spanish person not yet to be deported. Please welcome Sergio
o la comusda. No, do you believe in ghosts? I do? Actually,
I know you're from Spain. Yes, the beautiful village of

(05:02):
where you from Alga. I was born in Malaga, Malaga.

Speaker 3 (05:06):
That's that's where we were born. Because my hometown is
too small back in the days to have a hospital
or anything like that. So we were rushed to the
main city, which was Malaga, and then after you know,
a couple of days, they take you to your village,
you know, and that was Marea. Marea is a beautiful
town area, Marea between I actually live in another town too, Stebona, Marea,

(05:29):
like ten minutes away.

Speaker 1 (05:30):
You know, how close to the coast is that.

Speaker 3 (05:32):
That's right there? Like I was raised right on the
beach in the Mediterranea and.

Speaker 1 (05:36):
You could wave to the people in Africa.

Speaker 3 (05:38):
Yes, I could see Africa from my house.

Speaker 1 (05:42):
Now you are a builder, like a manly builder, yes,
a real builder. But you're also an architect. How did
you get in this because your father who passed away
a few years ago, a wonderful man, who was the butcher. Yes,
in your hometown.

Speaker 3 (05:57):
Yeah, my family we were butcher for I mean since
eighteen something, you know. Like my great great grandmother was
already a butcher.

Speaker 1 (06:07):
She was a butcher.

Speaker 3 (06:08):
She was the butcher of the town, like the butcher
of the town all the generations up to me. I
was raised in the butcher, you know, cutting meat when I.

Speaker 1 (06:17):
Was a kid, and when you're in the family of
a butcher, you you're kind of royalty in the town.

Speaker 3 (06:22):
Yeah, I mean you have expensive, tough you know.

Speaker 1 (06:24):
But every place that you went they like treated you
guys with respect your family because you yes the restaurants,
they would take care of you.

Speaker 3 (06:31):
Yeah, I mean up Maria ended up being like the
Beverly Hills of Europe, like super expensive that all the
celebrities will go over there. And my father specifically at
that time know of the butcher when it became really fancy.
All the town we served the meat to, like people
from on Assis to the Kennedys to the young Board

(06:54):
you like Tennis, so the young Board wedding. I remember
as a kid taking the meat for his wedding.

Speaker 1 (07:01):
Did the doll ever get to tasted?

Speaker 3 (07:03):
I'm a hundred percent sure. So that was where I
was raised, you know. And then all of the sudden
I told my father that I wanted to be an architect,
really early on, I was eight years old.

Speaker 1 (07:12):
Was he upset or was he like, no, this is good. No,
he was happy.

Speaker 3 (07:15):
The only thing is kind of an interesting story here
because I got my eye. I hit my eye with
the rock playing with my friends, no, Accidentally.

Speaker 1 (07:24):
I was like a hate crime.

Speaker 3 (07:25):
So I had a bleeding in my eye. So they
had to take me to a hospital right away, and
they actually flew me to Barcelona to the Barracker Eye Daughter,
which was one of the best still is in for
eye daughters in Europe, because I was losing my vision.
I remember that. And I arrived there and my mother
is holding me. I was like six years old, seven

(07:46):
years old, you know, and my mother was plaining to
me the building and my eyes were closed. I cover
everything and my mother was planning me the spiral stairs
and things like that. And I say to my mother
at that moment that I wanted to be a builder,
I mean an architect, and.

Speaker 1 (08:04):
If you're going to go blind, and my mother was like,
oh yeah, sure. But I ended up beat.

Speaker 3 (08:08):
The Barracker fixed my eyes and I went all over
the world standing architecture, study architecture in cevi yeale.

Speaker 1 (08:14):
You went to a fancy school here in Los Angeles too, right, Yeah, sire?
How many tests you have to do to become an architect?

Speaker 3 (08:19):
I took ten tests? You took ten? Yeah, I don't
know how many times did you fail them?

Speaker 1 (08:23):
And never fail it? You never failed a single test.
And yet I know tons of people that take these tests.
They can't pass a single one.

Speaker 3 (08:32):
I did it all in one shot.

Speaker 1 (08:33):
Now, I interviewed a handful of architects and then a
handful of builders, and you one because you're like, hey,
I just want to surf every day with you.

Speaker 3 (08:47):
That was the main reason everything started. Because you wanted
to leave right next to the job site.

Speaker 1 (08:52):
That's your nightmare, right, yeah, this.

Speaker 3 (08:54):
Is the worst nightmare for a bill, for a builder is.

Speaker 1 (08:56):
To have their client live on the job side. That's like, no,
you have to understand that. Sergio and I every day.
I would spend all day with him, like for years,
for years, just you know, and we.

Speaker 3 (09:11):
Would Daniel like I would be working in the job site,
a busy morning always no like with the guys. There's
probably like twenty thirty guys working in the house, and
and Daniel is like, at nine am, he's like testing me,
when are we going surfing?

Speaker 1 (09:25):
You know? Oh, well that those are good days when
I'm in a good mood. It's better better surfing than
when I'm angry about stuff.

Speaker 3 (09:30):
And then I like, I can't go, Yeah, I have
a meeting, you know, have this and and then Daniel
will come up, you know with like barefoots in the
job site. Come on, get your shoes on, you know
where we.

Speaker 1 (09:41):
Go serve for an hour or two. Now do you
think that affected how long it took you to build
my house?

Speaker 3 (09:46):
Obviously, you know, I mean we're surfing.

Speaker 1 (09:48):
How come you can't actually predict how long projects will take?

Speaker 3 (09:51):
It's very complicated. There's too many things, especially you know,
we the kind of work we do is not usually
people do in construction. We are in the company. We
are like six seven architects. We each kind of take
a project and we are like very focused on the design,
on the detailing. So we all back and forth trying

(10:15):
to get the idea of the project. You know, all
resolved very nicely. And it's not that it's no shortcuts,
you know, as you know, I mean your house is
a masterpiece of like detailing.

Speaker 1 (10:25):
No, that's not. I mean a lot of times the
project manager on a build site doesn't have the experience
that you have. Yeah, I mean that's fair, right, Yeah,
I mean when I was interviewing these guys, a lot
of the project managers were a little too I don't
know what the word is, like a redneck too rough. Yeah,
real builders. Well I don't know, just say it was

(10:47):
like you just and then you are a surfer. When
did you start surfing?

Speaker 3 (10:50):
I was thirteen years old in Portugal, the first thing
I got in the war.

Speaker 1 (10:55):
But you're more of a just so people know, you're
not a traditional short porter. Your old school, you longboard.
You like to write first point in Malibu. You like
to hang ten, you like to just pose, you do
your thing. We used to surf constantly, and then since
you finished my job, I would argue that you have
quit surfing.

Speaker 3 (11:16):
Kind of, but it's gonna be temporary. It's gonna be temporary.
I'm building my house now too, so I'm like super busy.

Speaker 1 (11:22):
You're building your house. By the way, he's building his
house in an area in the mountains. It's it's it's beautiful.
It's like there's not a lot built around there. But
the reason that you build picked this lot was one
day we were at the Old Place restaurant, just coincidentally
at the same time my wife and I. You were

(11:43):
eating with your family there and then my wife you
What did my wife say to you?

Speaker 3 (11:47):
So I don't know if everybody knows the Old place
is a really tiny, beautiful western kind of building.

Speaker 1 (11:53):
No h.

Speaker 3 (11:55):
Really loud inside. And I'm talking to Carly, your wife,
and you're talking to Lorena, my wife. That's the way
I like it. And Curly, you know, in the middle
of all these sounds, she tells me you should find
a place to live around here, you know. You know,
like in the movies they do this that they isolate
the sound, you know, and they all all you listening

(12:18):
that very clearly in your ears, you know, and it
came right into my brain, like you know, she's right,
this is where I should be living, you know. So
after we have a lunch in there and all that
we were living, and instead of making a right towards
you know, the freeway to go back to Santa Monica,
I told my wife said, you know what, don't we

(12:40):
make a left and see the neighborhood here and we
go make a left. One block away. There's a sign
or sale of an empty law that was in a
Sunday and on Friday, I own the law.

Speaker 1 (12:53):
Yep, you see that, you guys. My wife manipulated another man,
another man, so I should bring this up away. Your
wife way too attractive for you, agree, Ah, it's almost confusing.
Now she's is she half Mexican half Chinese? Yes, Ah,

(13:16):
she's a beautiful woman. Oh does she ever say things
to you like, hey, Sergio, why don't you maybe you
need it a little bit? Does she ever say tune
it up a little bit? She does? Yeah?

Speaker 3 (13:27):
Oh, and I have to keep up, you know. Okay,
it's one of the difficult when there's such a difference
in beauty.

Speaker 1 (13:34):
Let's say, you know, you got to keep it up,
you know, and but are you keeping it up? You
don't look as you For a while there you were
looking like a sea lion. But now you're starting to
get back into shape a little bit. Yeah, but you're
not doing anything to get in shape or no, of
course not. Your brother is he older younger?

Speaker 3 (13:56):
He's a you know, half older.

Speaker 1 (13:58):
He's older than you, but yet looks ten year younger
than you, Lise. And he's just sexy, and he just
lives in Spain and just all the women love him.

Speaker 3 (14:06):
He's dangerously sexy. Like I cannot introduce like to a
happy couple, like I'd be scared to like introduce you
with your wife. You know, you have a beautiful relationship.
You think you would take my wife. I think so,
But the problem will be your wife, that's the problem.

Speaker 1 (14:23):
Uh huh.

Speaker 3 (14:24):
They all questions like what I'm doing you know that
I cannot take advantage of. Maybe it's running and lover.

Speaker 1 (14:29):
You want to talk about the time my wife was
infuriated with you? You might now, Rune. First of all, you
once walked in on my wife changing. Do you remember that,
really you saw her completely naked? Yeah? She remembers that.

Speaker 3 (14:41):
What happens, you know, when you're building a house and
you're there all the time, you know, huh.

Speaker 1 (14:46):
So okay, this this was a meeting that we had.
The house was complete, but you know, there was things
that we were going over a punch list. So one
time we're in our bathroom and we're having a meeting
in our bathroom. Now you have to understand our bathroom
is is not and there's a separate door for the
water closet for the toilet. We're having a meeting and

(15:06):
there me, you, and like four or five other men,
and we're going over the punch list. And then about
ten minutes into the meeting, she finally just gives up
and she comes out of the toilet. She'd been in
there the whole time, and we were in there having
a meeting, and she was so embarrassed. So and I
got in so much. Truyn remember that too. I was like, well,

(15:28):
we all know what you were doing in there, and
she's like, well, I was was like she was contemplating staying,
but she knew this meeting was probably going to go
an hour. She's like, so she just give my walk
out and she's like, you caught me. Oh that. She
was furious about that. She also those things happened. Do
you remember when she fell in the septic tank. I
remember that day she fell into the septic tank.

Speaker 3 (15:51):
Because you know the whole complexity of like, we had
the pulling one house next to the construction site. You
were living in that guest house. So we were in
the pool, and we weren't in the pool.

Speaker 1 (16:02):
We were talking up by the.

Speaker 3 (16:03):
You and I were in the jacuzzie.

Speaker 1 (16:05):
We were in the jacuzzi.

Speaker 3 (16:06):
We were in the yaguzzi, Okay, talking you know whatever.
And and your wife decided to go to the guest house. Huh,
And she just walk out go to the guest house.
The lid on the septic tank wasn't it slipped out
from underneath and she felt now the rant. There was
a brand new septic tank that was clean and empty.

(16:26):
But she fell up to like this and was holding herself.
She was and she was screaming for Sergio and Daniel
to come help her because she didn't have the strength.
We're in the jacuzzi, there's bubbles, we don't hear anything.
And fifteen twenty minutes later she comes walking up, all
disheveled and and says, I fell into the septic tank.
She's crying, no way, and she storms.

Speaker 1 (16:48):
Away from us. She was so mad, you guys, you know.
And then I found out a few weeks later that
she was she was pregnant, and that I think that's
what did it.

Speaker 3 (16:58):
Getting sometimes a little yeah, shocked. I've helped, you know.

Speaker 1 (17:01):
Do you remember the time that you came back to
the office and I had filled your trailer, uh with
with gay pornography? Yeah, just so so you come back
to your office on a Monday morning and there's nothing
but gay pornography, ye, all throughout your posters. You know,
I still have those posters.

Speaker 3 (17:20):
No, it was it was very strange because I was
actually leaving to Spain that day. I think, like I
was leaving early that day, I had another guy taking
my place, you know what. I was going to Spain
and so the other guys, what's going on in here?

Speaker 1 (17:38):
This is how I like it.

Speaker 3 (17:39):
Yeah, I was like, well, if you feel uncomfortable, just
take it down, you know.

Speaker 1 (17:44):
So he left it for him. Of course that's nice.
You remember that one time. These these are the little
things I would do what we always say to keep
it clean, the worksite clean, totally to Olympia. That's all
that's in my head forever.

Speaker 3 (17:59):
Now.

Speaker 1 (17:59):
I just would Olympia. Yes, I like the works that clean.
But sometimes what I would do. I did this bit.
One time. I took a band aid, a used band
aid of mine, and I had put it placed it
somewhere on the floor in the work site. And then
a moment or two later I went and got Sergia,
and then we're walking around and then I'm like, Sergia,

(18:19):
look there's like a band aid on the ground. And
I picked it up and I ate it. Yes, I
remember that, and you were like freaking out. God, I'm like,
if you're not going to clean up, I'm gonna eat
these things and he ate it. Well, yes, but it
was my band aid. So, oh God, this Those are

(18:39):
just the silly things we did. Now, everyone who stayed
behind during the Woesley fire saved their house. I couldn't
because I was in Vegas doing a charity show. What
was your excuse for not saving my house? I got scared?

Speaker 3 (18:56):
I was.

Speaker 1 (18:56):
I remember that.

Speaker 3 (18:57):
I was like, Okay, the fire started, you were in
Las Vegas or whatever. I came next day. The fire
was coming closer. Everybody was leaving Malio. There were a
line of under pas going towards Santa Monica, like literally, yeah,
And I was driving the other way towards your house.
You know.

Speaker 1 (19:16):
Do you think if we would have stayed there, you
and I, we could have stopped it. I think so
I needed you there with me. Yeah, I should have listen.
I was doing God's work. But you just started the
very next day cleaning up. I've got photos of you
in a hazmat suit, just just the next day. We
didn't even wait for permits, and they by time we

(19:36):
had cleaned up, they were like, hey, do you guys
have a permit to clean this up? And we're like,
we're done. Most of the workers they build your homes
are Mexican, Yes, they do. They treat you differently because
you're from Spain or No.

Speaker 3 (19:52):
I have the best relationship with the workers, best relationship.
I always take care of them.

Speaker 1 (20:00):
Mm hmm. I take it very serious. I love them.
I mean, well, there's so many of these guys that
I got to meet. Now. I see them on other
job sites, so I just yell at them, you know,
whenever I see them, and we have a good time.
The concrete guys, they're intense. Oh, I love those guys.
The framing people. I don't care much about framing guys.

(20:20):
Framing people, they always just make mistakes. You build houses
and then you're just like people are like, oh yeah, yeah,
we know that's wrong. We'll fix that later. I'm oh, Jesus,
how many times have you You've been mad? And we've
been in screaming fights.

Speaker 3 (20:33):
You know, we had our things, but we probably such
an intimate relationship. I mean, I'm building in your house,
you know, inside where you basically are all the time,
where I'm pooping or you're pooping, and you have.

Speaker 1 (20:45):
You ever seen me poop outside? So many problems.

Speaker 3 (20:51):
Yeah, people know these like he has this, he can
panic if he doesn't have a toilet clothes, you know,
but many times we are like getting ready to go surfing,
you know, and I put my sweatsuit on everything, I'm
ready to go in the golf cart.

Speaker 1 (21:07):
And then we're like, okay, we're gonna go.

Speaker 3 (21:08):
And then all of a sudden, it's like Daniel turns pale,
you know, sorry, I gotta go, I gotta go. I mean,
he just run to the toilet, you know. Yeah, And
I'm waiting, I'm waiting for him. And then finally he
comes back, like because he gets scared, Like we're gonna
go for two hours far away from a toilet, you know.

Speaker 1 (21:26):
No, the ocean is a huge toilet for me. One
time we went surfing. You cut your foot like like
a you know whatever, two inches. No, it was not
a big cut, all right, he had a no cut.
Oh my god, it doesn't matter half of us. That,
what's it? It's because you don't ever lose, you don't
scrub your feet. You have too much dead skin down there. Anyway,

(21:48):
it was a big cut. Fine, I'll let you have that.
But but I'm not gonna let you have is the
rest of the story. You weren't feeling well and you're
like can I And I said, I'll just give you
two Tailenel two extra strength Thailand all. That's it, nothing fancy.
He started to kill me. He starts freaking out. He goes,
what what what did you give me? And I said, oh,

(22:11):
to Thailand all. And he goes, let me see, let
me see the box. And I give him the box
and it says extra strength on it, and he goes,
it's just extra strength. I don't take drugs. I don't
take drugs. And he starts gagging himself. He starts gagging
himself and like he had taken some poison to make
himself vomit to get the pills up, which he eventually did.

(22:31):
Oh my god. Yes, he had never taken thailand All before,
which doesn't do anything anyway.

Speaker 3 (22:37):
Yeah, I don't take those things, you know, But you
give me two it's west overdose.

Speaker 1 (22:42):
Did that's what you did before you met me? Had
you ever heard of me before? No?

Speaker 3 (22:51):
Well that doesn't mean anything. I don't watch the TV too.

Speaker 1 (22:53):
No, it's just very insulting. Well and it's not I
don't know anything. Have you ever seen one of my shows?
A little bit? Yeah? Not really, it's not your cup
of tea. We hang out for seven or eight years.
He's like, I'm not gonna watch you. You're awful.

Speaker 3 (23:11):
I think you're very, very funny. I left with you
so much.

Speaker 1 (23:14):
Where would you where would you rank my house and
the projects that you've done.

Speaker 3 (23:18):
I think it's the best. You know, it's the best
I ever done. Well, that's nice to hear, I guess
because I had to do it two times. So the
second time was you had to the.

Speaker 1 (23:25):
Main house twice but me. But but the way it
did a very good architecture, you know, and you modeled
your home after my guesthouse.

Speaker 3 (23:36):
Many, yes, many ideas.

Speaker 1 (23:37):
I have to say.

Speaker 3 (23:38):
You know, I have the privilege of working with the
best architects and the best clients too that they care
about design.

Speaker 1 (23:48):
So you just steal their ideas a little bit, you know. Okay,
that's we all do that, okay. And then and also
speaking of stealing, how many things on your project right
now for your home that you're building. We're actually at
one point ordered for my house. They're gonna take me
to jail now, No, no, no, I'm the one that
would have to say that that there's a problem. I

(24:09):
would be like, no, I didn't, I didn't need that.
But then all of a sudden, I see it. I
go to your place and look at stuff, and I go, hey,
that looks familiar.

Speaker 3 (24:15):
Yeah, you're gonna see a lot coming.

Speaker 1 (24:19):
Sometimes. My tile, my concrete tiles, You're like, you need
to order more, and I'm like, are you sure that
doesn't seem like that? And you say, no, no, you
need more, and then make sure how much I need
and then and then sure enough, one one of your
bathrooms is going to have my same tile.

Speaker 3 (24:35):
I'm gonna put for I have many tiles from you,
but I have for for your left your kitchen tile,
those cementals that are so gorgeous, that's going to go
for sure in my adu. I'm going to make a
wall out of that wall. Yeah, on my on my
kitchen there. I like that and it's kinda amazing. And
I have some more left towers that I'm going to
see where I'm gonna put it. Then I have other

(24:56):
tiles that I you know, I'm going to use the
main house the door that yeah, I have a whole
doors ten door of the garage.

Speaker 1 (25:03):
Right, And that makes it makes sense that you used
it on a garage where we had it was in
a powder room and it made it look like it
was the detective office because it was like Smoke hated it.

Speaker 3 (25:12):
You hated it, and I was like Carly and I
were like, not a fan.

Speaker 1 (25:15):
I got toilets too. You got toilets for me, not
the fancy one. You did get the fancy one.

Speaker 3 (25:20):
Yeah, it's like a five thousand dollars toilet.

Speaker 1 (25:23):
That's not my fancy one.

Speaker 3 (25:25):
Then no, well the real, real fancy one that came later. Yeah,
well I have the one that you didn't like.

Speaker 1 (25:32):
It. You didn't like because I left poop stained every
time you went. You know, what are you gonna do
with that? It's okay, ye, your your wife is gonna
hate you for that one. Do you remember this story? Huh?

Speaker 3 (25:43):
Like you were in to or something. I don't know,
you were working, traveling or something. And it's like then
it's like calling me and said, yo, can you go
and poop on my toilet and take a picture after
you flash it?

Speaker 1 (25:57):
Okay, because I want to make sure that it was clean,
you know, like it really flashes.

Speaker 3 (26:02):
Well, you know this is like okay, and like on
the job side, Okay, guys, I'm gonna poop in here.

Speaker 1 (26:08):
You know, you don't have to tell them. You can
just go. Nobody's asking you. So was I a relatively
easy person to work with? Yeah? Really, I think I
didn't think you were going to say that.

Speaker 3 (26:18):
Well, it's like everything, but a builder likes to be pumper,
you know, like like and you are very good at that,
like you yeah, pumpering, like like take me out for
incredible lunches. Remember, oh yeah, we're trying to speed you
up a little bit. Remember the seafood We got lobsters
and everything. Yeah, and like that kind of thing. You know,

(26:41):
we builders love that, you know, that kind of treatment,
you know, I know.

Speaker 1 (26:45):
But now I can't even get you to hang out.
You're just gone all the time. Pierre my French friend.
You competitive with Pierre? You like Peer, you hate Pierre. Well,
it's the relationship between Spain and France. You know, who's
got better food Spain or France Spain? It's not even close?
Not close art. Who's better at art? Though?

Speaker 3 (27:04):
I mean Belascus? Yeah, you name it, Picasso, Picasa?

Speaker 1 (27:07):
Where's he from?

Speaker 3 (27:08):
You from my hometown? I was born like two locks
away from.

Speaker 1 (27:11):
Him, two blocks away from comedy? Who does comedy better? Spain,
France or the United States? I think it's great. Is
there a comedy seen in Spain? Yeah, basically in the
south Spain, the south. Yeah, we are.

Speaker 3 (27:33):
We are having found all the time. If you're from
the southest Spain, they know that you're like almost like
a comedian, you know, because we always having fun laughing
about everything.

Speaker 1 (27:42):
Who's Who's better? Builders?

Speaker 3 (27:44):
Absolutely Spain, I mean we have one of the best
architectures in the world. You love architecture, Yeah, that's my passion.

Speaker 1 (27:51):
Yeah. A famous architect went to your wedding. True.

Speaker 3 (27:55):
Yeah, yeah, Michael Rotundi. He was one of the founders
of Marpha and more than anything, he was the director
of Sire for ten years and he was crucial educator
for many architects in Los Angeles and in the world.
Incredible teacher.

Speaker 1 (28:15):
Who is the greatest architect of all time?

Speaker 3 (28:17):
Miss vander Roe? Who's that was an architect from Germany
that later on came into the United States. He did
the Cigarettes building in Manhattankay, many other ones including the
Barcelona Pavilion, beautiful little building. He's an architect and understood repetition, okay,
symmetry and also being able to kind of stop time

(28:45):
and it makes these contemplation images of the landscape is
framing of the landscape at the Farnworthhouse in Chicago.

Speaker 1 (28:53):
What's the deal with Frank Lloyd? Right? Well, do I
have to care about him? Absolutely? Okay, there is that.

Speaker 3 (29:00):
One of a very interesting buildings by friend lock right
is the gug Him Museum in Manhattan in New York,
where I don't know if you've seen it. It's like
a spiral. You come up in the elevator and then
you see the gallery. It's all about time. It's a
it's time moving through space. You know.

Speaker 1 (29:17):
It's how can I explain it to you, Daniel? You can't?

Speaker 3 (29:20):
Do you know the Disney Concert Hale, No, the little
flower like that would the Stainless Dell. That's the complete
opposite of the goug And High Museum in New York.
It's about space. It's about space, coming opening up, La,
It's all about space. Guen Him Museum is about time.
Time is way more important in art.

Speaker 1 (29:41):
Okay, guys, this is you're getting a glimpse of what
my days were like every day when my house is
being built, where I would ask like, hey, how come
this bathroom wall isn't finished yet? And then he would
go on a forty five minute conversation about time and
space and just be like, all right, what architect do

(30:02):
you do you think is overrated? Or do you not
like is there buildings or are homes that I can't
stand their work? Or do you just not say that
because it's not good for business. No, but you know,
I don't know. It's hard to like. I just don't.
I can tell you architects. I like the Japanese guy
that works only in concrete. You think he's a genius,

(30:23):
Rightwando from Japan. I'm not into it. It's just pure,
just concrete blocks. I'm like, that's to me, it's very
very good. Oh yeah, it's very monolithic. I love monolithic.
You love you love things that look monolithic. You're always like,
look at this.

Speaker 3 (30:39):
I'm from South Spain and we have we know you've said,
tis like the Alhambra. You know, well, this is like
the ultimate monolithic walls, you know, sitting on the landscape.

Speaker 1 (30:51):
Where yet on brutalist architecture.

Speaker 3 (30:53):
It's good architecture should be kind of brutal, because he's
a building should be made hustan the time. This is
what I enjoy when I go to Spain or the Hambra.
I went to Rome and I see buildings that have
been up for two thousand years and they look more beautiful.

Speaker 1 (31:12):
Wait, what's the architect that invented data slide in that
city in Spain where everybody gets hurt? Do you know
what I'm saying about.

Speaker 3 (31:19):
Yeah, it wasn't designed by an architect, that's for sure.

Speaker 1 (31:22):
It's the most dangerous slide you've ever seen in his town. Yeah. Like, well,
they have to shut it off. Like the opening, Grandma's
and children. We're going three hundred miles an hour down
this huge slide.

Speaker 3 (31:35):
There is a change of height, knowing from one street
high up to the lower street. And the developer of
that area get together with the politicians, say why don't
we do a slide, you know, So I get to
build all these units, you know, and then I build
you this park with a slide that goes all the
way to the other street down there. The day of
the opening, the whole town is there, fresh up, you know,

(31:57):
and they they say, okay, it's open, you know, and
they started people throwing themselves through the slide and they
just like you know, people breaking the legs, burning that
because it was like stainless steel you know, burning the
whole leg you know, you know, it was a disaster,
so they had to stop it.

Speaker 1 (32:16):
You know it good?

Speaker 3 (32:18):
What is flamenco in music? There is a few hot
spots for music in the world. Okay, Flamenco is very
because it's very deep. It's like in America and the blues,
you know, but the blues, like the blues that they
play just with the hands, maybe like really like slavery blues.

Speaker 1 (32:38):
You know, I guess I don't know. I don't really
familiar with the hand slavery blues.

Speaker 3 (32:43):
It came up from Africa, you know, I mixed with
European like the gypsy coming from Romania, and that created
the flamenco.

Speaker 1 (32:51):
Do you listen to it all the time? Every time
I listened to your whatever you're listening, it's just the
worst club music, like a bea abisa no no no,
you like you love? Yeah, yeah, well love, but this
is not what I listened. No, But you do rock
out to some clubs, of course. We mean, of course
that's you're always like, listen to this song.

Speaker 3 (33:13):
For us, it's like for like like, well, I kind
of pump it up a little bit when I see
you because I know you make fun of me.

Speaker 1 (33:20):
Ah, what's your thoughts on gaspacho?

Speaker 3 (33:23):
And know it's from my region of Spain, so I.

Speaker 1 (33:26):
Don't care, Sergio. Do you like it? Do you love
love it?

Speaker 3 (33:31):
But okay, here's the The ingredients are very important. I
have the privilege of my brother growing his own veggies
for the gaspacho in the summer.

Speaker 1 (33:42):
That's why his body.

Speaker 3 (33:43):
Saw grows on veggies top body. And so when I go,
I mean the tomatoes he grows. It's called balls of
the bull because they're like hanging like that, really large
and incredible favor frey or no acidity, and it's just
that's a perfect tomato to do the patch.

Speaker 1 (34:04):
My wife makes caspacho using cherry tomatoes, and it's a
little explanation on that. I'm teasing. I don't know, and
no she does. She actually hates caspachio. But he would
admit Italy has better tomatoes.

Speaker 3 (34:18):
Yes, well, the tomatoes more from the south. The Salmoreco
is from the south from where I am.

Speaker 1 (34:22):
No, so your tomatoes are comparable to Italy tomatoes, way
better than it is. I didn't see that coming. I
didn't see that coming. Don't even get me started on sardines.
You know, Oh I don't. I'm I don't care that much.

Speaker 3 (34:35):
You haven't been in you having ate the sardines from
my town.

Speaker 1 (34:39):
You're very proud of Spain. You have a lot of
pride in your.

Speaker 3 (34:42):
Co very, very proud, you know. I think it's the
best country in the world.

Speaker 1 (34:45):
But now you are no longer allowed to go back.
Is that true?

Speaker 3 (34:48):
I can go there any time in a while.

Speaker 1 (34:51):
You have dual citizenship. You're you know you became When
did you become a citizen in the US.

Speaker 3 (34:56):
Maybe like fifteen years fifteen years ago. But I can
go back and for you go back for my kids.

Speaker 1 (35:03):
You go back usually every summer, and you pull one
of the craziest husband moves I've ever ever witnessed. You
have your wife and your two kids go ahead of
you fly to Spain, and then you go two weeks later,
So you get two weeks to be by yourself here
and you don't have to travel with the children. Now,

(35:24):
now your kids are a little bit older, But back
in the day when they were just babies, you were like, no, no,
she does the flight by herself.

Speaker 3 (35:32):
She goes for two and a half months with the kids,
and I only go three weeks, so I get all
that by myself.

Speaker 1 (35:38):
Here. You know, what's the best region in Spain? And
is that where you're from?

Speaker 3 (35:43):
Well, yes, that's where I'm from. But I'm biased, No, no,
you'll say very biased. Every region is very different. It's
it's hard to pick one because you're not you don't
have apples to apples. Everything is just so different. But
I'm from the South and that's kind of like, you
know obviously what I like the things from the South.
I like the people from the South. I like the food.

(36:05):
I like the flamenco. You know.

Speaker 1 (36:07):
Pete Is is now a resident and bought property in
Spain well through his through his wife and his wife's
sister lives there full time, so now he he feels
like he is a local in Spain. It's probably the
best move. What region do you live in, Pete astorias.

Speaker 3 (36:24):
A Studios Astoria You know you hate that. I love
as you love it because, okay, I mean the quality
of the food there, it's not comparable to anything in
the planet. I mean plan on the health planet. I'm
talking about, for example, the Capaalst cheese you know from there,
from the mountains of the because of Roba is the

(36:45):
most expensive cheese in the world. It's like a little
cheese this big, like a four pound It's twenty five
thousand dollars dollars for a little cheese that shepherd makes
in the middle of the mountain.

Speaker 1 (36:59):
Oh, I'm gonna make a case ad from my kids
with that cheese.

Speaker 3 (37:02):
This is what I'm talking about.

Speaker 1 (37:03):
The beef. I mean, the beef is a studios. It's good.

Speaker 3 (37:07):
Very close to a studio is Leon and Leon has
the number one beef restaurant in the world.

Speaker 1 (37:13):
Shocking. Yeah, you sound like Trump just always talking about it,
but like you're like the Spaniard version.

Speaker 3 (37:19):
And just saying number one everything and just saying the
true The seafood over there that I mean, you can.
You don't need to go anywhere else in the world.
Once you get used to the food there and you
go somewhere else, you know that you're gonna eat horrible.

Speaker 1 (37:32):
You know, Should I buy one of these houses? It's
one dollar in Spain? Do they have Yeah, those offered
in Spain. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. Up
in the hills in the middle of nowhere. They if
you buy them for one dollar, but then you have
to agree to renovate them and stuff like that.

Speaker 3 (37:49):
One hundred percent recommend that you do.

Speaker 1 (37:52):
Oh brother, that's gonna cost me, isn't it.

Speaker 3 (37:55):
There's actually a lot of people doing this now in Spain.
It's just going far away in the middle of the country.

Speaker 1 (38:00):
Do you think you'll ever move back there permanently or no?

Speaker 3 (38:02):
Yes, you think you will? Yeah, I interesting. I have
to figure out, you know, but I can't, you know,
just be here. I miss spaying a lot.

Speaker 1 (38:12):
Why not have two places a place there in a
place here.

Speaker 3 (38:14):
Yes, that's fine, that's but I have to go more
than a month a year, you know what I mean?

Speaker 1 (38:19):
Like I have to say. You're gonna want your youngest son,
you know, we're talking about ten years from now? Yeah,
yeah him? Yeah, yeah, I gotta How big is your
pa a pan? Well?

Speaker 3 (38:30):
Min, you haven't seen my new one?

Speaker 1 (38:33):
You got a new pa pan. Yes, I'm going to
do a point bit. It's pretty big. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (38:36):
Yeah, I can feel like easily like twenty people.

Speaker 1 (38:39):
You know, twenty people.

Speaker 3 (38:41):
It has a three ring burner with independence, so I
can control everything.

Speaker 1 (38:45):
One time you were telling me, like we have to
do pay a, we have to do pay a. I'm like, fine,
we'll do it. And then you're like, okay, I don't
actually know how to do it. I have a friend
that does my pie for me, and you're gonna like,
maybe you're gonna make me bring another guy to my
house for me. No, I'm not inviting another member. So
then you're like, no, no, okay, fine, I'll do it.
So then in Tahoe you came. You always talked about

(39:08):
the thing that's the most important pie is being level.
Everything has to be.

Speaker 3 (39:13):
Level, very important. So when you have a level the
liquid it's the same amount, so the rice will cook evenly.

Speaker 1 (39:22):
Mm hmm.

Speaker 3 (39:23):
If you are off a little bit, there's more water
and more dry in another area, so the rice is
not gonna cook at the same.

Speaker 1 (39:29):
You don't season enough, is what I'd like to say.
See some.

Speaker 3 (39:34):
Like this, like it's the you put like the safran and.

Speaker 1 (39:40):
I still have some of the fancy seats on the
many you gave us.

Speaker 3 (39:43):
Yeah, well the piment tone you know I give Danny
when if we finished the house finally, you like, I
give you a little I know.

Speaker 1 (39:51):
And then my wife made pi a one time and
you stood next don't get mad. You stood next to
her and you critiqued her for over an hour, and
she was losing her mind. She couldn't handle you just
telling her what she was doing wrong for over an hour.

Speaker 3 (40:05):
Well the problem, okay, I think I know what happened. Actually,
she took a recipe for fifteen people and put it
in a little pan, a pan that I gave you
four lights, three and a half people.

Speaker 1 (40:20):
A portions were wrong. Yeah, so she it needs to
be the rasings.

Speaker 3 (40:24):
So when you know, when I when I get burnt,
I remember when I got there to your house that day,
Amanda comes to me and says, Sergio, SOO, you know
Carl is cooking up yeah for you.

Speaker 1 (40:36):
You know, Like what yeah, yeah, you know.

Speaker 3 (40:40):
I'm like, okay, so you know, I go over there
and I see her cooking my japan a mountain of right.

Speaker 1 (40:47):
She was not going a mountain of rising your pie.

Speaker 3 (40:50):
I'm like, oh my god, what is that? I'm making
up aya for you? You know, but look at this,
this is like you know this I see her for like,
I don't know, you.

Speaker 1 (41:01):
Can't cook it. Her proportions were off, that's what you're saying.

Speaker 3 (41:03):
So she took a recipe that I think my wife
gave her to her or I don't know when she learned,
when I cooked it in Tahoe whatever, and she put
all that into a little pet.

Speaker 1 (41:13):
There's no good, no, no, no.

Speaker 3 (41:15):
It was like some kind of Chinese rice or something
like that. You know.

Speaker 1 (41:21):
One time my wife cooked for your family and she
made Mexican food. And your wife says to my wife,
you know, as a Mexican woman says, oh, this is
so many flavors, that's what she said, so many flavor
I'm like, why would you cook Mexican food for a

(41:42):
Mexican woman. I mean maybe she meant it as a compliment,
but I don't think she did. And I don't remember that.
This wasn't this was in Tahoe.

Speaker 3 (41:49):
Oh in Tahoe. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, something like that.
And your wife is, yeah, I remember that now, yeah
yeah that was didn't cut it, yeah.

Speaker 1 (42:00):
Didn't cut it. Now. Do you take naps every day? Yes?

Speaker 3 (42:04):
You know, because you've seen me sleeping in the car.

Speaker 1 (42:07):
That's right. You did used to take you used to
go out your car and take naps. I take it today.
It doesn't matter. I kind of do. I kind of
function without it. How long do you nap for? Usually
just all my.

Speaker 3 (42:17):
Life in Spain, and I know I can't tell you.
Those are kind of things that are programming in my brain.
I eat lunch and I fall asleep. I mean I'm
fall asleep, not restling like fall asleep completely.

Speaker 1 (42:26):
I know I do the same thing. Do you remember
how young you looked when you started working at my house? Yeah,
h we're both aged and yeah we both aged. I
was single. I'm coming to start now, I'm coming. You're
not coming back, it's over. Hey, everybody's on the show
gets some gifts, so let's start. Let's start giving you
some gifts. That's the reason why. Okay, I know, by

(42:47):
the way, what what where'd you get that shirt that
you're wearing right now?

Speaker 3 (42:50):
This is the most comedian and give it to me.

Speaker 1 (42:53):
I've always given them clothes. Sergio is one of the
one of the people that gets my clothes first dips. Yeah,
he also is like for for a builder, you're you're
pretty bougie. Yes, you care about brands. Like sometimes he
would see something on me and goes, oh, I like
that brand very much. I'm like okay, and then he
would tell me, he goes, I've got a hookup in

(43:15):
Palm Desert, at the James Purse outlet store, and she
hides the good stuff that comes into the outlet store,
lets me know. And then I go out there and
I get to buy a bunch of stuff. Okay, here
up for a couple of things. Here, there's just some
nice sweaters for you. You likes what this is, Vince,
you'll like them? Yeah, this is beautiful. Well, yeah, you'll

(43:37):
like that.

Speaker 3 (43:38):
This is totally uh huh.

Speaker 1 (43:40):
Yeah, it's got fun pockets to it, and it's got
a here's another sweater, see that one as a hood
Do you wear hoods ever?

Speaker 3 (43:48):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (43:48):
I didn't think so. But don't take your coaster. Yeah,
you'll like it. Now, you have tiny feet, not really, man,
it's for a man for a.

Speaker 3 (43:58):
Billion excuse me, you have it's strangely a big feat.

Speaker 1 (44:03):
Okay, but your son, your son has man feet. He's
using He's got like three or four parents. Now he's
using there. Now I'm gonna blow his mind. Now I'm
gonna blow his mind. This is gonna be for your son. Oh,
this is gonna be for your son. He's gonna love that.
Ok At this, we're just gonna give your son every
Look at these shoes. These are some of these have
never been worn. I know. Look at these. Oh, he's

(44:25):
gonna love all these shoes. He's gonna love. Look at
these shoes. Oh my good, Oh my god. Some of
those there's some dirt on there. But you see like
this is to be Look at this these shows, say
Tosh point oh on him. Adidas made me a pair
that said to my all right, you're saying that all
these shoes, No, there might be forty pairs of Get

(44:46):
that off my desk. Go ahead and put that over there.
You can keep the bag too. I'm not done giving you,
but get this off my desk so we can get
to the next set of gifts. Get that sweater off
my desk too. There's rocks on worth it. Hold on
next next gift I have for you. I don't know
why I found this today. If that, I know that

(45:06):
because you change the model. I changed the model. So
I want you for your house. I don't know if
I can use that, but yeah you can. Oh yeah,
this is a yep. This was in your in the
little class. I remember leaving this in there. Well, now
you're taking it back. It's it's really beautiful. It's really beautiful.
I always thought about taking it, but you know, no,

(45:28):
it's good. I always thought about taking it, all right,
So you can take take this intercom because I want
I want that. That's nice if we If you don't
use it, that's fine. What else do I got for you?
I don't know what these things are, but you left them.
I don't want them. Yeah, that's a sip wall. Yeah,
this is great. Here's some zip walls.

Speaker 3 (45:44):
This is like when we have to put temporary walls.

Speaker 1 (45:47):
Yeah. Well I've never used those, so I don't know
why they're in my house. I use it in your house. Actually, here,
take this what is Oh no, no, that's no, that's
not mine. There, it was left in my work site.
It's got a dry creed in it. Whatever that drive
cement stuff. Get a quick drive, quick dry whatever it is.
You know, don't open it here.

Speaker 3 (46:06):
It's nasty, man, it's never that is not mine.

Speaker 1 (46:12):
How many photos are in your phone? Oh? I don't
even know. You don't see I want to know nine
sixty nine thousand. Yeah, I just no one takes more
photos than you. And then like I'll call you in.
I'll have a problem in my house and I'm like, hey,
do you have photos? I need to know if it's
a straight shot from the telephone poll to I need

(46:32):
to know if this conduit is a straight or if
there's a junction box. And you're like, hold on, and
you scroll through sixty nine thousand photos and you're like,
I think it's a straight shot. It's a straight shot.
You're good. Explain your plan to get rid of Wilshire Boulevard,
a major road that runs the entire length of Los Angeles,
and turn it only into a pedestrian road.

Speaker 3 (46:55):
Las Angele has a couple of problems. One needs to say.
Public space is a disaster, you know, like we don't
have a good public space. Like you go to any
European cities and you see a plaza or something like that.

Speaker 1 (47:05):
It's so active.

Speaker 3 (47:06):
You know, here, pluses are half empty, parks are one
hundred percent empty. And the reason there is only there
is a reason is because everybody has a park in
their home, backyard and front yard. You know, we have
so much open space. Los Angeles is a very low
density city, and when we make a park, it's not

(47:26):
relevant you know for the urbanistically, Okay, it's just another
empty space, you know, it's not It's the opposite of
Manhattan and the Central Park you know over there, it's relevant.
You need that because you have so much density. So
every time we try to do an open space here
in Los Angeles is very difficult. So I think what
it needs to be done is read open space and parks.

(47:51):
Like a transportation system, Los Angeles is design based on
freeways and based on moving through space for long distances.
You know, we love commute. If you stay home one
day and you don't commute, not you, but two hours,
most of the people getting nervious. So, oh, I didn't
drive for two hours today. You know why because we
have problem us just moving through space through freeways, you know,

(48:13):
and everything is so thin, everything is far away. So
a park has to be designed with that logic where
we connect big distances like Cinta Monica to downtown. Literally
it's a lineal park, a linear freeway of pedestrians and
also bicycles. Electric bicycles. Now that completely change the distances,

(48:35):
you know, like we are from Santa Monica to downtown.
I think we are like maybe twelve miles away.

Speaker 1 (48:42):
You still got that red wagon, I got you. I
love it. You still got it. Oh yeah, but your
kids are huge now, so you don't need that. Yeah,
we still get all of us on top. Yes we do.

Speaker 3 (48:52):
What it's incredible, incredible bar or something like that. Just anyway,
I think those angel list, especially now with the Olympics.
You know, I'm from Spain, so we went through the
Olympics in Barcelona, know, and we transformed the whole city.

Speaker 1 (49:08):
Are you excited for the Olympics to come here? Well? Yes, but.

Speaker 3 (49:13):
Who are you going to cheer for Spain? But if
it's Spain is not playing traitor and US wings, I'm happy.
What about in soccer? Who will you go for Spain?
That's that's a mayor, Yeah, that's.

Speaker 1 (49:26):
That's Did you overcharge me?

Speaker 3 (49:30):
No, it's just it's the things that costs, you know,
like like to do things right and to redo many things,
would redo many times, you know, and it's just that's up.

Speaker 1 (49:40):
You know. You didn't over charge me. You did, you didn't,
all right, I Sergio, thank you for being on the show.
I tell you, thank you. I hope your son fits
in all the shoes and I can't wait for you
to finish your new home.

Speaker 3 (49:53):
Yes, thank you Daniel for having me. This is all
a pleasure.

Speaker 1 (49:57):
Strong hands, Causha, I want to thank Sergio for being
on the show. And I want to thank Sergio for
building my home. I love my house. I'd hate to
sell it, but I will you give me the right offer.

(50:20):
I'll kick my family out of there tonight, Carl, you
don't gonna do now. A couple updates from people that
have been on the show. A couple of your favorites
are Barkley Marathons runner this year, John Kelly. Guess what
what didn't finish? He finished three loops, three of the
five loops. No one finished this year's course. They made

(50:44):
it harder, too hard. You know why why because last
year a woman finished and they're like, well, we can't
have this. We can't let if women are finished in
the race. So anyway, they made it a lot of
part of this year. John finished three loops. Congratulations, you

(51:05):
finished two thirds of the race. That's just a funny
race to be in. Yeah, hey, I was in a race.
How'd you do? No one finished?

Speaker 3 (51:15):
No?

Speaker 1 (51:16):
All right? Darrell the ex NFL player that's now a chef.
Remember he was sniffing around. Remember he's kicking the tires
on the show, asking me parenting stuff. Yeah, guess what
they're expecting their first child. Come good job, nice job.
Oh man, he fucked up my wife's best friend, Jocelyn,

(51:37):
Doctor Jocelyn who's been on the show. She's still pregnant
and she's keeping the baby. Come on, it's gonna be
a little girl. And that's sweet. All right, let's get
to the plugs. What do we got toss show store
dot Com, Eddie's tour? Hey where Eddie Edi? You're gonna

(51:57):
be in Austin. Oh tomorrow night? Wow, cap city. Man,
that brings back some memories. I know it's a new
location from the one that we used to do yea,
but memories nonetheless. Oh I used I used to have
a nice Austin friend. She worked at the Yellow Rose.

(52:23):
Oh man, I miss her every day I think of her.
Then you got my tour this summer in the Midwest.
Also on sale this week is some NorCal locations Monterey,
Santa Cruz, San Francisco, Central Cal, if you will, or
nor Cal whatever. Let's do the free plug hit the

(52:44):
free plug music. Now that's good church music right there, Hosanna?
All right, what are we free plugging? Iowa's most popular
bacon festival and one of the oldest and largest bacon
festivals in the world is returning to the Iowa State

(53:04):
Fairgrounds this May third, the seventeenth Blue Ribbon Bacon Festival.
Organizers will transform the Agricultural Building into a bacon boat
for a yacht rock themed bacon extravaganza, and aside from
all things bacon, there will be live music from Southern
California's very own YACHTI by Nature Come yep. This will

(53:27):
feature unlimited bacon samples for all attendees. Is Baco's welcomed
or no, oh that's good. I don't know, They're probably
not welcomed. It's not real bacon, you know in Baco's.
I used to love putting those on my salad. Anyway,
that's not part of this. The event will feature a
renowned bacon eating contest. Jesus Christ, is that just how

(53:51):
much bacon you can eat? Or like? Is there? You know?
It is a style of bacon. You ever had raw
bacon at a sushi place? No, yeah, you probably shouldn't
order that. The first contestant to eat ten strips of
bacon without throwing up or losing any large pieces will
win one hundred dollars ten strips. That's something on that's

(54:12):
on the Denny's menu. That actually that line might be
taken from a Denny's menu. You also get a trophy
and some lipator Lipator's Probably that's not real. I'm just
joking with that, unless Lipidor is a sponsor to the
Bacon Festival, which those things. Those things would pair up nicely. Anyway,
If you think you can defeat defeat Ryan Plue, who

(54:35):
has won the last two, get over to Blue Ribbon
Baconfestival dot com SEP to fill out your entry for him.
Because only twelve lucky tripisson try trycipitents how do you
say it?

Speaker 3 (54:48):
Participants?

Speaker 1 (54:50):
Only twelve people get to compete. That's at three fifteen
and doors open at eleven, But make sure you're there
by one. Oh god, so many numbers for the presentation
of the twenty twenty five Bacon Queen. Ooh, that'd be
kind of cool the Bacon Queen if you were dating
somebody and you found out there were the Bacon Queen.

(55:12):
Isn't every woman's dream in Iowa to wear a sash
with Bacon Queen on it? I think so. I wonder
if you have to be born into that. Tickets to
Porka Balooza are twenty nine dollars for general admission, which
will I mean twenty nine bucks not a bad deal
if you're if you if you say to yourself, well,
I'm gonna at least eat ten dollars worth of bacon today,

(55:33):
because now you're talking about just paying nineteen dollars to
hang out. If you're willing to spend forty nine dollars
with the VIP ticket, you will get the koozy, plus
a pastry to build up your bacon eating base, and
a one hour early entry into the festival. Oh that
means you're gonna get to get the good bacon, the
crispy strips. Yep. My wife always orders bacon extra crispy

(55:56):
everywhere we go, and I'm always just like, just stop,
just let them make the bacon the way they want
to make it. I get it. If you're at a
gross place and it's just rubbery, but extra crispy please,
Oh okay, my grandma here wants to have, you know,
no taste, just some charred I wonder if I'm I

(56:18):
wonder if I'm allowed to bring my pig to this
bacon festival. I wonder if he if that's considered cruel
this is a twenty one and up event? What that's nonsense?
Children love bacon. Why is this twenty one and up?
I don't know. If I would have known it was
twenty one and up at the beginning, I might not

(56:40):
have plugged him so well, all right, Iowa State Fairgrounds
located at three thousand East Grand Avenue in Des Moines, Iowa.
Stay crispy, See you guys next week.