January 7, 2025 • 50 mins
Daniel sits down with his wife’s BFF, neonatal nurse practitioner Jocelyn, to discuss working inside the NICU, her unusual upbringing, and how many dudes his missus slept with in college.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
How easy would it be to switch babies on someone
in the hospital?
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Easy?
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Yeah, Oh God, damn it? Cashaw Cosha show up show.
Hey guys. Dan Tosh here, host of Toss Show twenty five.
Happy New Year. We're one weekend and I got to
(00:27):
tell you, honestly, this year sucks. It's been bad since
day one. I mean, what what happened? Oh, nothing happened.
Just a gut feeling you, just a feeling about this,
just a gut feeling that it's going to be a
rough one. I went down to the beach and I filmed.
I don't even tell you I filmed something here. I'll
just play it for you. Period a second. Trump sucks, Dix,
(00:54):
that's a crisis, kid, How would hear it?
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Both of those things?
Speaker 1 (00:59):
Now? Well, I'm not a handwriting analysis expert, but did
you think the guy that was writing christ Is King
also wrote the other one?
Speaker 2 (01:10):
I man, I want to imagine so God.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
I want to imagine so too. That just be real funny.
I wonder if a handwriting expert could look at something
written in the sand and take something away from it.
That's what we got to find out. We got to
get a handwriting analysis expert on this show to tell
me if the man that wrote Trump sucks dis is
the same that wrote christ Is King. Both messages have
(01:35):
a strong opinion.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
What if there's a world where's like two people out
there writing messages in the sand. Yeah, no, it's it's
it's funny to think of them doing it at the
same time and looking over at each other. What do
you have. I'm writing Trump sucks dicks and that guy's like, oh,
I'm writing christ Is King. Oh that's good too. Let's
go ahead, breakfast, little nail on head. If you ask me,
(01:59):
it's funny when you see something that somebody writes on
the beach and you're like, ah, that's funny. Speaking of
saying goodbye to twenty twenty four and good riddance. By
the way, my wife we've been talking regularly about sitting
across from me. She seems to be receptive, all right. Now. Now,
(02:21):
if my wife backs out of the deal somehow, and
Lord knows she's capable of screwing things up, I thought, well,
what better replacement than today's guest, my wife's childhood best friend, doctor,
neonatal nurse practitioner. Oh, it's a good day here. Enjoy Tasha,
(02:48):
my guest today, has seen a lot despite a humble,
white trash upbringing in Florida. She is now a neonatal
nurse practitioner with a PhD. She's also my wife's best
friend and they share many secrets that they had planned
to take to the grave. Please welcome doctor Jocelyn.
Speaker 2 (03:09):
Hi.
Speaker 1 (03:10):
Are you nervous?
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Very?
Speaker 1 (03:11):
But it's the best, Jos. This is a special day
for me to have you in the hot seat now, Jocelyn,
many people might not know you. I believe were The
very first hello from Toss Show was to you. Yes,
but you're my wife's best friend. Ah, that's silly. Well,
(03:32):
I mean, it's debatable if you're her best friend because
you guys have a little click. I don't know the
pecking order exactly, but we'll get to it eventually. Do
you believe in ghosts?
Speaker 2 (03:42):
I lived with the ghost ones you did? Yes? When
when I lived in Canada, our apartment was haunted like it.
I don't know how to explain, but we would wake
up in the middle of the night to like water
being turned on like full blast, and then it would
shut off, and then it would turn on blast and
shut off. One time we were like telling a friend
(04:04):
that the water kept turning on and off in the
middle of the night, and as we were explaining it
to him in like broad daylight, the water in the
bathroom like turned on full blast.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Oh that's good. That was good of some validation. Yep,
are you Canadian?
Speaker 2 (04:17):
Half Canadian?
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Were you born in Canada?
Speaker 2 (04:20):
No? I was born in Florida.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
Okay, So you and my wife you met in fourth grade? Yes,
So you guys met in fourth grade and you had
the same boyfriend. No, wait, you wanted to switch boyfriends
in fourth grade.
Speaker 2 (04:35):
We went to different elementary schools. Oh, but they had
like one community fourth grade dance and.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Your the fourth grade dance. They allowed fourth grades to dance.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
I guess.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
That seems weird, okay.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
And they at that dance, that's where I met her,
and she asked me if we would trade boyfriends.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
So the first time you met her was her saying, hey,
can we trade boyfriends?
Speaker 2 (04:58):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (04:58):
Who was the guy she was with?
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Ian Sharp?
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Ian Shark a famous Now I know Ian Sharp only
only through folklore. Him and his brother. His brother's name
was Madison. Yep, Madison Sharp. They were the best skim
boarders on the West coast of Florida. Oh, they could
skimboard and every every girl knew it. Which one of
(05:22):
them played Glycerin one time on the guitar. Ian Ian
Sharp played Glycerin on an acoustic guitar, and the girls
just just I don't I don't want to say this
because I don't know how old they were, but they
were turned on true or false?
Speaker 2 (05:40):
True?
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Okay, so you were with.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
Ian carl you were with a boy named Chip.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
A boy named Chip No One, and Charlie was like
fucking and she wanted to switch to Chip, and you
were like, yes, I will make this switch.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
I think I said no. You said no, yea, I
said no.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
But Chip, Chip's dead, right unfortunately? Yeah, yeah, that's that's
that's very unfortunate. Uh. He died in an ATV.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
Accident not long a couple of years after that.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
Now, my wife famously, in her family, they love to
fucking talk about it that she skipped third grade or
second grade, one of them, one of the meaningless grades.
They act like, oh, she's so gifted. She has to
a shitty Florida public school. She skipped a grade. I
tell you what if you can't skip a grade in Florida.
(06:32):
You might you might need to be tested anyway. All right, Carly, Yeah,
was my wife the valedictorian of her high school, and
you were a distant six. You were six, seventh, seventh,
You were in the top ten.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
Yeah, top ten.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
We know this because when all of them get together,
this little friend group, one of them Megan who's in Kentucky.
She didn't get into the top ten.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
I think she was eleven.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
Embarrassing. I know she finished eleventh in the class, which
I don't think they even they don't even recognize that. Yeah,
you're just you're just in the class. But now you
know you've graduated from Johns Hopkins. Do you think that
you are so much smarter than Carly?
Speaker 2 (07:17):
No, you don't know.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
Oh but you are.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
No, I don't think so.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
I asked Carly simple questions, and then when she doesn't answer,
I go the The fact that you call yourself a
valictorie is embarrassing.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
It is a Florida high school.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
I know, but she should be able to answer simple questions.
How old was my wife when she lost her Virginity.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
College college?
Speaker 1 (07:44):
Yeah, she didn't lose it in high school. No, that's
great to hear. Look, at that she's pristine. Oh my goodness,
there's so much tread on the tire before we get
into the fact that you're you know, you take care
of babies in the nick you the most traumatic time
(08:09):
for most parents, and you've done this for how long?
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Sixteen years?
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Sixteen years? That's actually a long time. Good for you.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Well, I was a nurse for five and then I've
been a nurse practitioner for eleven.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
I guess when did you get your PhD?
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Was it a DMP? I don't know if it matters, but.
Speaker 1 (08:27):
Was it k Are you a doctor?
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Yes, a doctorate of Nursing Practice, which is a little
bit different than.
Speaker 1 (08:33):
A that's what they make women get.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
No, those what that you make women get? That don't
like research.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
I just remember putting your report cards up on my refrigerator.
How long ago was that?
Speaker 2 (08:48):
Twenty nineteen? Okay, yeah, five years?
Speaker 1 (08:51):
I remember that. Before children, life was fun, Yeah, a
lot of them. Are you exhausted by the way today?
Speaker 2 (08:58):
No?
Speaker 1 (08:59):
She flew here today, all the way from Charlotte, North Carolina.
Do you hate Charlotte?
Speaker 2 (09:05):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (09:05):
When I first met you, you were you were doing
travel nursing a lot, so you would live in different places.
I believe when I first met you were living in Houston.
Maybe I didn't meet you when you lived in La. No,
you've lived in La You've lived in Seattle, You've lived
in Houston, yep. And at different points you've loved them
all and you've hated them all. Which cities in the
(09:28):
United States have the best hospital care for babies and mothers?
Speaker 2 (09:32):
The West Coast in a mile? Yeah? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (09:35):
What about New York?
Speaker 2 (09:36):
I think like the Boston New York area is pretty good,
but then the South is like there's actually the margin.
Dimes has a report card and if you look at
the report card, it's like pretty good, Like New Hampshire's
pretty good up in the northeast, and in the south
is just like a D and an F and that.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
Just speaks volumes. But huh, you can't tell them anything,
ken you. No, they've got everything figured out. Well. Enjoy
your coin flip. Okay, full term forty? When when does
the nick you? When is it mandatory that the baby
has to go to the Nike?
Speaker 2 (10:13):
You usually less than thirty, like under thirty five weeks
and under like two kilos or one point eight like
around four pounds. They would have to come to us.
But if you're thirty five or thirty six weeks and
you can like maintain your blood sugar, you can breathe
on your own, you can stay warm, then you would
(10:34):
stay with your parents.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Oh what a cutoff. Yeah, you got to make it
to thirty five weeks. Yeah, and anything before when you're like, oh,
that's not that's not gonna that's going to be a
lifetime of some some potential.
Speaker 2 (10:48):
We've gotten better, You've got.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
You can fix things.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
Yes, like we are. Science is a lot better now.
We take care of the baby's a lot better. So
like I used to think, like when I first started,
like twenty six weeks, was like, oh jeez, like I
hope they learn how to walk, And now like a
twenty two weeker can do all the things.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
What percentage of babies that are born before thirty weeks live.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
The further you are from term, the less likely you
are to survive. But even like a thirty weeker has
like a ninety over ninety five percent chance.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
Yeah, like they do really went five week old.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
Twenty five week er probably, I don't know the statistics
off the top of my head, but like really good survival.
But if they have more bid like different things wrong
with them because they were premature. It goes up higher
and higher the earlier you are born.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
Is there any age where it's like, no, that does
that's that's.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Twenty two weeks. I'm not going to try to Yeah,
twenty two and zero is the lowest we will save, okay,
or like attempt resuscitation, like offer to do something, and.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
That's anywhere in this country. You always used to joke
about when you were pregnant, like hey, go to Mexico
until you're from twenty to twenty eight weeks.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
I still would do that personally, but right, not twenty
eight but like twenty four weeks.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
Is the point that you were saying was sometimes in
this country we save children that we probably shouldn't, right,
And it's not shouldn't, but it's like, come on, like
nature's handling itself here, guys, right.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Well, it just doesn't take a lot to be a baby.
So like all they have to really do is breathe
and tolerate food. But it's hard to imagine what that
would be like as like a five year old, where
it's like they are all they're doing is what a
baby would do.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
What's the youngest baby you've delivered that you've seen.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
Survive twenty two and zero?
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Do you always try to break the record?
Speaker 2 (12:50):
No?
Speaker 1 (12:52):
No, I mean the thing with the pregnancies that you
just you're always like, oh, well, once I get once
I hear a heartbeat, and they're saying, well, no, you
got to get to the twenty one one where you
can really find out this, and then it's like no, no, no,
you got to make sure that they're at least thirty.
It's just there's just no end. That's the problem. And
my mom would argue, you know, who was a lifetime
nurse and she did pediatrics for a long time, but
(13:14):
would just be like, they love to do that when
an our day well and our day kids just died constantly.
But take that away. There is something too like oh
I'm pregnant and not knowing anything until oh I'm delivering.
Is there is some peace of mind in that. Well,
(13:35):
you can at least focus more on the excited stuff,
because like you, I try to get you excited about
stuff and you're like, well, yeah, but look at this,
this and this, and what if you're always like what
if their eyes aren't blue? You don't care about that.
How awful is it talking to these parents that were
(13:56):
so excited about having a baby, and then it's, oh.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
They're excited even if they're born premature. They are, I
mean they're sad for like the baby being born early,
but they're just very It's they get to celebrate a
bundred milestones that like a baby born at term they
would never get to, like breathing on your own or
like taking a bottle for the first time eight weeks
after you're born. Like, they're they're very excited.
Speaker 1 (14:20):
It's how many people is it? Is it like because
of drugs or anything like that.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
In Seattle, Seattle had more than other places like north
of Seattle. There's a lot of heroin there.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Yeah, well no, I mean I figured as much. Yeah, yeah,
they get them all.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
Yeah, by the.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
Way, true or false, especially in Seattle. Yeah, a lot
of times people would come in delivering early because they
try to do a little recreational cocaine.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Sometimes, Like cocaine is not that popular. Well it's not
like the drug of choice.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Of course it's not. But if if you do cocaine
while you're.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
Pregnant, you can have as abruption.
Speaker 1 (15:04):
You hear that, guys, yes, don't let him do cocaine.
They're gonna have a baby. Have you ever played a
prank on the dad and brought a newborn that's a
different race, uh, to them and like, here's your baby.
All that'd be fun. You should do that one time.
Just bring over, bring over, especially because you're in the South,
(15:26):
go to some some real like good old boy, white
white man and just bring a little black baby over
and go, this is your baby and just watch his face.
Ought to be a good gag. And then be like,
you're on my prank show, Nick, you race bait. I'm not.
I'm workshopping. I don't like it. Nick, you should see
(15:50):
your face. That's better. How easy would it be to
switch babies on someone in the hospital? God damn it.
I mean we knew it. We knew it.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
It could be done, Yes, it could easily be done.
All newborns kind of look the same, like, I mean.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Man, this is true. I don't think my kid's mine.
I've never wanted to spend fifty bucks on the little
DNA test I've seen, but maybe I should do it.
Your life outside of the hospital, hospital precision smart. You
know everything you do. Then you go home and you
might be the messiest person I've ever met.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
It's just comical. I've spent almost every holiday with you
since i've met you, the ones that I care about
that Thanksgiving, Christmas were usually together.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
Then you had to go and ruin everything, and you know,
you got a man. For the longest time, you were like,
I'm just I'm just you know you were you were
so weird about who you were interested in. I want
to date Wayne Gretzky. I don't know what you said.
I was just like some hockey star or something from Canada,
(17:00):
sem like somebody that you'd like. Okay, is that silly?
Speaker 2 (17:02):
It's really.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
But then then you then you met your current boyfriend,
and true or false when you met him, he was
in a healthy marriage.
Speaker 2 (17:13):
It wasn't healthy, but he was married legally. Yeah, so
it took a while.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
They were separated.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
They were separated, they were like in the process of
a divorce. Okay, they still had like shared custody of
their dogs.
Speaker 1 (17:23):
And how long did you wait before having a child
with him?
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Fifteen months?
Speaker 1 (17:29):
Oh really?
Speaker 2 (17:30):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (17:31):
Oh wow? Why in my head was it so much shorter?
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Well, I mean ten of nine of those months is
growing a human.
Speaker 1 (17:41):
So you got how quick did you go pregnant?
Speaker 2 (17:44):
Now I got to give right, six months?
Speaker 1 (17:47):
Six months? That's okay, you sneaky, sneaky. Ah. And then
you guys had a child. Ah that changed everything?
Speaker 2 (17:55):
Yes? Is that fun having a child?
Speaker 1 (17:58):
Yeah? Yeah, you've feel better at work now that you
have a child. That because did people ever be like, oh,
you don't have a child? Did people ever ask.
Speaker 2 (18:06):
No, No, they would, Nobody ever asked. But I do
find it harder to be at work now, Like I
always like thought it was somebody's like, this is someone's
child that we're like doing these harm like like a
Lombard puncture or something super painful. It's a like a
spinal tap, like where you put a needle in their spine.
But now when I have to do it, I'm like,
(18:26):
this is somebody's child, Like it like actually like wears
on me. It's hard for me to do my job
now that I've had a child.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
Yeah, that's tough. There's something something I was seeing your
kid go in and have any procedure where you're like,
oh this isn't right.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
You know what I used to like about you, what
you disappear for six months. Where is she? And then
I'd be like, oh, she's in Thailand. You used to
travel like a crazy person?
Speaker 2 (18:50):
I did.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
Yeah, just by yourself. Yeah, and just like yeah, I'll
figure things out.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:56):
That's always That's always impressed me because I could never
do it. I mean I guess, I guess I probably could.
I don't know. It terrifies me. You like traveling the
world by yourself?
Speaker 2 (19:06):
I yeah, I really liked it. It was I mean,
we was. I would go to places that were supposed
to be safe for girls to travel by themselves.
Speaker 1 (19:13):
Well, what blog do you look up for that?
Speaker 2 (19:16):
There's actually one called the Blonde Abroad, which is about
like solo female traveling.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
And that helped you.
Speaker 2 (19:22):
Yeah, I followed a lot.
Speaker 1 (19:23):
Of you had you never had any problems.
Speaker 2 (19:26):
The only like scary thing that I had was in
New Zealand, which is a super safe country.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
Super safe.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
I was in like a camper van for three weeks
and I was in some random coastal town and I
could we're.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
In the South Island. I was in southist South Island's
creepy as shit, Northland. South Island's beautiful.
Speaker 2 (19:46):
It's beautiful.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
Fucking the people in the South Island are fucking weird.
Christ Church is creepy. Okay, yeah, it's all stupid.
Speaker 2 (19:53):
Yes. But then I was like walking on a boardwalk
and I could feel somebody following me. And then I
turned down a street where it was like all w
windows in the building and I could see his reflection,
and so it turned into like a pizza place, and
he stopped and waited outside, and I don't know what
like possessed me to like go back out, and I
could see where my hotel was, so I just like ran,
but he started running too, but thinkfully went inside before
(20:16):
he he started running too. Creep That was the only
creepy thing that happened to me.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
That if you dropped something and he was just trying
to give it back.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
No, he was not trying to get it back.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
Huh did you poop in that van? No? He had
a bathroom, didn't it Uh?
Speaker 2 (20:29):
I think it did.
Speaker 1 (20:30):
You don't drink water? I do drink, Yeah, it's full.
You don't pee and you don't drink water? Is that true?
Speaker 2 (20:38):
I mean I used so many times a day? Do
you pee like three? I'm a nurse. We don't get
to pee that much at work.
Speaker 1 (20:45):
She never peas. Guys, I know everything about her. She
never peas.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
It's so baffrom we don't get breaks at work or like,
can you give a step.
Speaker 1 (20:53):
In the middle of the night to pee?
Speaker 2 (20:54):
No? I know no, but if you start doing it
becomes like a habit. Your body gets used.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
Oh I p constantly, So you tell me I should stop.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
And started that.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
Yeah, it's my fault that I think.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (21:05):
When you're a doctor, you should fucking know.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Pen's not a habit.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
She says, peen's a habit middle of the night. Pens.
She's saying, it's not my bladder.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
I could be wrong.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
No, you're definitely wrong. But who cares true or false?
Before I started dating my wife, she said, why would
he date me? He only dates supermodels.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
That is true. Carly denies it.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
My wife denies that she ever said that. You say
it's true.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
It is true.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
I will one hundred percent tell that story to my
children when they get older, bragging. I'll be like, look
at this.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
But your wife is a supermodel.
Speaker 1 (21:41):
So if supermodels were five two and didn't make any
money modeling, would you say that you love me as
a brother, as a human?
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (21:52):
Have you ever said I love you to me? No,
do you think that you're allowed to? Do you think
that we will? What if we just started saying it
to each other? Do you think do you think Carly
would think it's weird?
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Probably not.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Okay, let's play a game of f Mary Kill. You
know how to play it?
Speaker 2 (22:05):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (22:06):
Okay me?
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Oh gosh, m hm.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
Your friend Megan's husband and your friend Jess's husband.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Ok.
Speaker 1 (22:16):
So it's so it's her, it's her four, it's these
childhood friends. She's got to play f Mary Kill with
her her friend's partners.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
Go ahead, Oh no, I would marry you winter winter
and then kill the rest.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
Look at her trying to take it the easy way out.
I'll bet you you and uh Megan's husband would have
a great time in bed. I've since iPhones have allowed tracking,
I've I've had I've tracked you. Yeah, because I've always
been like terrified that you were going to be you know, taken. Yes,
(22:58):
but there is nothing I would be able to do.
Like if that guy would have got you in the
South Island in New Zealand, I'd have been like, well,
I know where she is. I mean, I guess I
could kill it for I would call authorities.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
It is creepy getting a text from you though, at
like eleven o'clock at night, being like go home. The
Lincoln Memorial is so creepy at night, And I'm like, what,
how do you know where I am?
Speaker 1 (23:19):
You can turn it off, you can disable it. Now
I have to set up your life for a second. Okay,
you know, here you go. You knew this was coming.
So because some people they look at you, they probably say, oh,
look at that. She's just a charmed life. But you've
you've had some obstacles in your life. Okay, your mother
and your father. Your mother, how do I put it nicely?
(23:41):
She had an addiction problem. Yeah, not right away, not
right away. No, she was young.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
She was young. She was like twenty okay when she
had Yeah, she had my sister and I like got
nineteen and twenty one or something like that.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
Yeah, okay, your father was in the picture, not really
in the picture.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
I think they got divorced when I was like ten
months old, is I think what my mom is? So
they were married, they were married? Yeah what my mom
was a few months pregnant with my sister when they
got married.
Speaker 1 (24:08):
Oh that old story. Uh, huh. Okay, here's the thing,
your childhood. I'm sure when you reflect on it is like,
oh my goodness, this was so ridiculous what I went through.
What you know, other kids had so such normal families.
But like Crrently, when she reflects back on your mother,
(24:32):
she's like, oh, but but we all thought she was
the fun mom. Yeah, you know, because you would go
to your house and they would put i don't know,
shaving cream all over the trampoline. That seems like a
memory that stood out to my wife.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Yes, But then like because my mom was a kid herself,
she would let us like jump off the roof onto
the trampoline that had soap all over it.
Speaker 1 (24:54):
Okay, so was bad. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
I mean it's like in the moment, it was fun
and I didn't know anything different, But now it was
like an adult looking back, like I would never let
my daughter jump off a roof onto a trampoline with
soap on.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
It's a bad idea.
Speaker 2 (25:06):
So she like kind of went off crazy in like
two thousand and two thousand and one.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
She's an alcoholic, she's bipolar.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
She's bipolar. She was kind of got mixed up in
that like dope sick, opioid crisis. She like ripped a
rotator cuff and they gave her oxy cotton in like
two thousand when they were like prescribing it because they
didn't know how addictive it was. So she was like
that genre of drug addict.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
Your mother one time, you, I, is this true? You
were marrying somebody on some mountain. Oh yeah, and your
mom you had always paid for her, uh to have
a cell phone or something like that, and she was unhoused.
She was bouncing around the Southwest, and she found out
(25:50):
how to get into the account, and she locked you
out of the account. She ended up purchasing a bunch
of stuff an iPad got it closed you out of
your accoun and you just happened to be off grid
in a mountain and couldn't find your way back, and
now you were locked out of your phone.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
Yeah that's true.
Speaker 1 (26:10):
Oh that was great. Yeah, that's just a real lesson
and helping out. Yeah, how'd you break the code?
Speaker 2 (26:16):
I stopped at a Verizon. Like by the time I
got down the mountain and drove like an hour and
a half, there was like a Verizon store that I
went into and I had to show my ID and
they finally let me back in.
Speaker 1 (26:29):
They turned your phone back on? Did they turn hers off?
Speaker 2 (26:31):
Oh? No?
Speaker 1 (26:32):
So does she still have a phone under your account?
Speaker 2 (26:35):
She doesn't. But I did pay for that iPad for
like two years.
Speaker 1 (26:38):
Why it seemed like you could have paid it off quicker.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
No no, no, like the monthly service, like the oh.
Speaker 1 (26:43):
For two years she got? Oh she scammed you.
Speaker 2 (26:46):
Good in.
Speaker 1 (26:50):
Verizon. Verizon, come on, man.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
The Verizon in Taos, New Mexico. It was this very
specific store that was very much like, we can't help you.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
I'm a customer of Verizon and they don't credit you.
How much do you think all in you paid?
Speaker 2 (27:03):
I don't know. Because the crazy thing was is that
back then you would call it four one one if
you needed a phone number.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
I remember information, okay.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
But if you call it now, it's like two ninety nine.
And because she's like manic, like, she would call it
like twenty five times in a day, She's calling four
to one one.
Speaker 1 (27:20):
What number does she need?
Speaker 2 (27:21):
I don't know, but she would call it over and
over again. So my bills would be crazy high because
she was calling four one. She didn't know you could
like google something.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
I just feel like you've got grounds for some type
of lawsuits or reimbursement to Verizon. I don't think the
mentally unstable should be able to rack those kind of
bills up.
Speaker 2 (27:40):
Definitely not.
Speaker 1 (27:41):
I mean, I think we're glossing over how ridiculous your
childhood was. She did at one point live in a tree.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
Yeah, she did.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
And then again this isn't we're not making light of it.
How was she living in a tree?
Speaker 2 (27:53):
So, I don't know. I think she that was just
where she ended up, and that was where she could
get cells service where she wherever she was like the
highest point. Yeah, and she would just like call me
from her tree.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
Also, she also liked one time thought there's bugs coming
out of her body a lot.
Speaker 2 (28:10):
She still thinks that.
Speaker 1 (28:11):
She thinks there's bugs inside it.
Speaker 2 (28:13):
Yeah. I think that's like a side effect of doing math.
Speaker 1 (28:15):
But huh, they don't talk about that on the meth campaigns.
She had another child. You have a half brother who's
was illegally blind.
Speaker 2 (28:26):
Yes, you say illegally blind. Legally okay, legally blind blind.
He's blind. He doesn't have eyes. His eyes are glass.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
He doesn't have eyes, his glass instead of eyes. Okay,
I don't.
Speaker 2 (28:36):
I don't think I knew that, Oh, well, he was
premature and your eyes are like very underdeveloped when you
were first born, and so his never developed. And so
to like make his face be able to develop normally,
they put in glass eyes.
Speaker 1 (28:49):
Yeah, now you guys think, oh, that's got to be
the interesting thing that you brought up, not even not
even remotely what I thought was the interesting thing. But
now that I've learned about these glass eyes. He became
a figurehead in what church? What religion do you even know?
Speaker 2 (29:07):
Well, they're Catholic, but I don't think it was Catholic.
Speaker 1 (29:09):
Okay, it was. It was just it was just in
some Christianity, some church. He became a singer as a child.
And this is when yar is like, what the church
is so suspect, don't even get Jocelyn started on her beliefs.
She believes in ghosts. Do you believe in God? Don't answer.
But he would tour and he would play like arenas, Yeah, singing,
(29:34):
he wasn't, And it was just people were just like
why were they fascinated with him as a singer?
Speaker 2 (29:40):
I think because of his story, Like he would tell
his story of he was born to a drug addict mom,
he lost his eyesight because he was premature. And then
he's also autistic. And when kids are autistic, they can
often sing in perfect pitch.
Speaker 1 (29:51):
Could he sing it perfect pitch? Oh? He could. Here's
why I think I didn't think. I didn't think it
was amazing.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
No, But when he was younger, I think it was
the whole story. It wasn't just his voice, okay.
Speaker 1 (30:00):
Because well you said in perfect pitch and I was
always like, I don't think this is perfect. But yeah,
you're saying. But now he's kind of aged out of that,
and does he perform still or No?
Speaker 2 (30:10):
I don't think he still does like motivational speaking, okay,
and like telling his story and but no, I don't
think he sings it.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
I feel like the church and this is just me
and I'm I'm you know, I'm super hypocritical of the
church a lot of times, but I feel like they
were kind of using a kid.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
It was a good story. It's sold. I know that
millions of views and that.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
I mean the kid was popular. Guys like it was.
It was off the charts type of stuff. Did you
feel drawn to this profession because of your childhood.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
Probably a little bit like growing up Carly and I
would actually we had this like plan that we were
going to be an obstetrician and a pediatrician and one
was going to deliver the babies and the other one
was going to take care of them. And then once
Christopher was born, it like opened up this whole world
of like, oh, babies actually can be born sick and
early and not on time. I'm not healthy. And then
(31:01):
that's what kind of like introduced me to the nick you.
I didn't know it existed actually before then.
Speaker 1 (31:06):
And then there was just just that's what I'm gonna do.
It's pretty neat to have a clear vision of what
you want to do with your life. Yeah, that's the
only thing in your life that's just completely focused.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (31:18):
The rest of it just mm hmmmm. Yep. Do you
brag to your friends who don't live in Hollywood about
the time you slept on a pie at Leonardo DiCaprio's house. I? Yeah,
Have you ever told that story to any of your
your friends?
Speaker 2 (31:37):
No? I don't think people would believe me. If I okay.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
To be there, I'll tell you the story. You ready
for this? I rented Leonard. I've rented it multiple times.
Leonardo DiCaprio has an income property that he uses occasionally.
Got to pick a ball court in Palm Springs And
one morning, you know, she's in this house. We're all
in this house. And one morning I see her. I said, hey,
did you enjoy that slice of pie I gave you
(32:03):
last night? And she's like, what are you talking about?
And I go, I put a slice of pie under
your pillow, you know, as you would do. Yeah, pie pillow.
Speaker 2 (32:12):
It was still in the pie container though, No, no
it wasn't.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
It was on a plate. You're wrong, revisionist history. Really
it was on a plate. I put a plate with
a slice of pie. There's a plateless and I put
your pillow on top of it.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:27):
So she's like, no, you didn't, And I go, Jocely,
I fucking put a slice of pie under your pillow.
What in the did you? Then I thought maybe she
slept in a different room. We go to her room.
It smells like fucking pie. As soon as you open
the door, it smells like pie. And I lift the
pillow up. She she sleeps. Literally, this person doesn't pee
(32:50):
because she doesn't move just perfectly, still doesn't put her
hands under the pillow and there's a perfectly smushed pie
under her pillow. What kind of pie? I don't fucking remember.
It was pumpkin. It was pumpkin because I hate pumpkin,
and I did nobody ate it. And she probably made
me order it in the first place for Thanksgiving. It
was for Thanksgiving?
Speaker 2 (33:11):
Were there?
Speaker 1 (33:12):
That reminds me of another time? Go ahead, I was.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
Singing a different pie.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
Oh, one time she baked me a pie. It was
like a fruit cobbler.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
Did strawberry rubber.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
Strawberry rubarbie. You did your own crust. It was delicious.
It was for the Fourth of July. And this was
back when Twitter wasn't run by that dipshit. And I
posted a photo of you holding my pie and wrote
something stupid underneath.
Speaker 2 (33:40):
It and embarrassing, embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (33:43):
I was trying to find you a man. You were
always manless. It was just so depressing h anyway, But
I never wanted you to have a man, because it
was like you were our throupple. It's always fun to
travel with you because it was like just me and
my wife and you and and everything. By having kids
and you having a partner. Now you were in a
(34:03):
hospital working in Seattle, No, in La. I was in
it was La.
Speaker 2 (34:09):
Yeah, I was on a travel assignment.
Speaker 1 (34:11):
Okay, I thought it was Seattle, No.
Speaker 2 (34:13):
Because it was like the next night, like it was
fourth of July. And then the next night I went
back to work and my parents of my patient, who
were like very shy and like sort of embarrassed to
ask me, They were like, is this you? And they
brought up this embarrassing photo that you had tweeted of
me holding a pie and like a bathing suit top
and all these horrible comments under it about like what
(34:34):
people wanted to poke in my pie?
Speaker 1 (34:36):
And that's delightful. Well, that's that's good that they followed
me back then.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
Yeah, they were excited.
Speaker 1 (34:44):
But oh, man, do you remember the time I filled
your suitcase with shrimp scampy? She was leaving my house. Yes,
she was leaving Tahoe. And before she left, I had
taken her suitcase, which is always just the biggest suitcase
you've ever seen. It's just you know, at the seam,
(35:07):
zipper rip it whatever. I just and it had a
lot of pockets hidden there. So I just individually ran
wrapped a couple dozen shrimp scampies. Yeah, and placed them
like in her geen pocket, in a in the bottom
of a shoe in And then I unzipped the lining
of the of the suitcase and put some scampy inside
there and zipped it back, just tons of scampy. So,
(35:29):
because I wanted this joke to play out over time,
it did.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
Like months months we started finding them, like in line
to check in our bag, our shrimp scammy bag. But
then like six months later, I still found one rogue
shrimp scammy when I went to use that suitcase again.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
Did you eat it?
Speaker 2 (35:49):
No? It smelled horrible.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
Do you keep the luggage?
Speaker 2 (35:54):
No? I don't think. No, I don't have that SUITCA.
Speaker 1 (35:57):
That is that is good stuff. You can't beat the
old shrimp scampy gag.
Speaker 2 (36:02):
Yeah, that's pretty good.
Speaker 1 (36:03):
This is exciting a Toss Show first, Okay, you guys
ready for this? Eddie? Just go? Do you wanna? Do
you wanna? You want to hit me with a drum
roll or something? Okay? What do you? What's what's new
in your world? Right now?
Speaker 2 (36:23):
We're expecting number two.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
Doctor Joscelyn is pregnant right now with her second child.
It's a first on the Toss Show. An exclusive this
is where you want to announce it. Now, don't tell anyone, okay,
and just let us air this and just wait for
all the love to come pouring it. Are you as
(36:49):
excited as I am? Am I more excited.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
I'm way more excited.
Speaker 1 (36:52):
I couldn't be more excited. An amazing mother. You're gonna
it's gonna be so good. And you know what else
is gonna be. It's gonna be so fun for your
Oh my goodness, that's so great. I couldn't be happier.
I think it's gonna be the best thing in the world.
This one's gonna be so much easier.
Speaker 2 (37:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:10):
Are you excited about being pregnant?
Speaker 2 (37:12):
No, you're not. No Ah, My first pregnancy was horrible.
Speaker 1 (37:17):
Ah, but we still had fun.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
We did.
Speaker 1 (37:20):
You came up, You came up to tower right away.
You're like, yeah, yeah, it start out back. This one
just nothing but good signs. Okay, I can't imagine anything
bad happens. We're gonna have to re edit this fucking
I'm so happy that you're having another child. Not for
a few reasons. One of the reasons I'm so excited
is because you my daughter, Okay, my beautiful daughter, I
(37:45):
have spent maybe six dollars on clothes for her. And
the reason I've only spent six dollars is because you
you spend so much, You buy so much clothes for
your daughter, and then you say it to us once
she outgrows it, and then I give it on to
other people whenever we whenever we can. But now I'm
(38:08):
going to get to give it all back to you.
And there's just I mean, it's crazy how much stuff
you buy.
Speaker 2 (38:16):
I've cut back.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
You buy every color that it. You know, I'll get
into that in a minute, but you do you buy
the same thing though, I'll look at it. Oh, there's
five of these. I just the other day got something
from you where you had sent four or five new
sets of pajamas.
Speaker 2 (38:34):
Oh that was.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
And why and.
Speaker 2 (38:38):
Because, you know, because when I ordered that Cecily story.
But when I ordered the pajamas, they got lost. So
the company sent me a whole new order and then said,
if your other order shows up, pass it along to someone. Okay, yeah,
so that was.
Speaker 1 (38:51):
So you bought six pair, you got six pair, and
then another six showed up and you sent them on
to us. Oh, well, that makes a little more sense.
It's just all the time. I'm just like, every time
a box comes from you, I'm just like, God, damn it.
Why does there so much clothes? What does your daughter's
closet look like?
Speaker 2 (39:08):
There's not a lot in it? Really, Yeah, I give
it all away, Okay.
Speaker 1 (39:13):
Yeah, but I mean it's just at some point it
has to be filled, has be gridlocked. Everybody's on the
show gets gifts. Now. One of your gifts is I'm
so excited about this because, oh, this is only we'll
see how I can use this.
Speaker 2 (39:27):
Every week I watch you just like give away everything
I gave to you.
Speaker 1 (39:33):
That is hysterical, so Jocelyn. Multiple times on this show,
the gifts that I've given away have been gifts that
she gave me. The first thing I'm gonna give you
back this was bought for you. Yes, okay, my wife
and her friends went together and I'm told that this
(39:53):
is very expensive, yes, like five hundred dollars, and then
you gave it to us. Yes, and I'm giving.
Speaker 2 (40:01):
It back to you.
Speaker 1 (40:02):
Oh, this is going to be great. Are you excited
to use it again?
Speaker 2 (40:05):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (40:06):
By the way, we didn't use this one that much,
did I liked another one?
Speaker 2 (40:09):
It was super comfy, though.
Speaker 1 (40:10):
I didn't like it. It's also looks that stupid logo
I hated it. Is that? Is that a fancy brand?
What's it called?
Speaker 2 (40:19):
I think it's pronounced.
Speaker 1 (40:24):
Give us free ship? All right, so that's yours again.
This is Carle's she liked it, Yes, and inside there.
Watch look at this. I think it's I think I
saw this this morning. I just look at this Target.
Speaker 2 (40:40):
Gift card perfect, Okay, Okay.
Speaker 1 (40:43):
I don't know if there's any money on it or not.
But this is in my closet. This is, you know,
a new baby bag. There might be a pacifier in there,
who knows. Okay, Okay, Now when I get to regive
all your clothes, I want you to when we find
out the gender of your baby.
Speaker 2 (41:00):
I don't want to find out you don't. Eric does, well,
of course he does.
Speaker 1 (41:04):
That's normal.
Speaker 2 (41:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
Well, when we find out if it's the day that
they are born, uh, you know, if it's a girl,
I am going to unload hell on you. Okay, I'm
gonna send everything. I just want to give an example.
By the way, I got some stuff in here. I
want to this is a real bad outfit here for
for Eric. I want him to wear this. It's it's
(41:27):
it's James purse. But it's matching pants and shirt. It's bad.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
Nice, it looks awful.
Speaker 1 (41:32):
But make him wear that. And there's a shirt for him.
Oh thanks, Okay, but this is what This is just
a I want people when I say I'm gonna give
her trunks full of clothes bag, this is the thing.
Everything that she would give us tonally is brown's. You
only wanted your daughter to ever be in like muted
brown color. Why is that?
Speaker 2 (41:53):
I don't know, but she was kind of delayed in
learning her colors, and I always thought it was because
I didn't put her in like any primary colors.
Speaker 1 (42:01):
Every rainbow that you give is like a shade of
brown rainbows.
Speaker 2 (42:05):
Confused.
Speaker 1 (42:06):
Okay, so here you get these. Let's just let's do
you want what would you want for what sex? Boy
or girl? I don't hunt, you have no preference.
Speaker 2 (42:16):
No, just healthy, just good for you.
Speaker 1 (42:18):
You get it, And I say, I'm never that way.
I've always like, I just wanted a healthy girl and
then I got a healthy boy. Kind of kind of all.
Speaker 2 (42:25):
Right, okay, thank.
Speaker 1 (42:27):
You, hold on so much more stuff? Okay, this, oh
this because you travel so much dumb ship. This is
a travel rail okay to put on a bed.
Speaker 2 (42:39):
Perfect for your girl she needs.
Speaker 1 (42:42):
Now, yes, exactly. So Now when we travel this week,
she won't fall out because I have different things that
I use. Also, I don't give a fuck if my
kid falls out anymore. I'm like, just hit your head, buddy.
Speaker 2 (42:52):
She fell out of the bed last night. Actually, no,
you go.
Speaker 1 (42:54):
Now, you got this. I use this on tour, on
the tour buses all the time. Okay, that's it. Okay, now,
so excited are you excited for? You excited for the best,
the best one of my regifts? Okay, So I have
already uh finished Christmas shopping for my wife. Do I
(43:16):
buy my wife good gifts?
Speaker 2 (43:18):
Very good gifts?
Speaker 1 (43:19):
Good? Yeah, I'm a good gift gift Okay, so I
got them wrapped. I'm like, well, guess what, because you
were gonna be on the show, I'm like, this is hysterical.
I'm going to give you one of the gifts that
I had just bought my wife that she hasn't even
opened yet.
Speaker 2 (43:37):
Right, that's super exciting. Now, oh.
Speaker 1 (43:45):
You know that brand? Look at that Oh are you
so excited? Go ahead open that gift up see if
you liked it. That just scratched. How did a bag
scratch the table? It doesn't matter.
Speaker 2 (44:00):
I'm I'm o. Winning is really awkward because I was trying.
Speaker 1 (44:03):
To me about with you get it the box out.
Oh look at this Saint Laurent box.
Speaker 2 (44:09):
Okay, but what's in it for real scampy? Yeah, probably
Saint Lawn jacket.
Speaker 1 (44:15):
I'm not afraid to put. I'm not afraid to put
scampy in Saint Laurn.
Speaker 2 (44:19):
It's actually in it.
Speaker 1 (44:22):
Oh, there's so many boxes and bags when you get
a Saint Laurn.
Speaker 2 (44:27):
Oh wow, No, I know it's an actual bag.
Speaker 1 (44:29):
I know. Well, wait, you need here's my thing. You
need a big tote for the for the new one,
and and nothing better than like a sexy, cute one.
Speaker 2 (44:40):
Yeah, it's beautiful.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
No, it is, and it's the It's the it bag
right now, is what Carrie told me. Oh really, Carrie's like,
this is the it bag. Oh man, are you so
excited now? You're you're excited for your baby. By the way,
You're not even gonna take care of it. You're gonna
fill it full of your dumb fucking granola bars that
you eat at work and there's diapers and swaddles, and
(45:04):
I'll get that off of this. Look at that bag,
you guys, Oh, my wife is gonna be fucking furious.
Speaker 2 (45:13):
Well, she'll be excited if you decide to go in
the same direction for her.
Speaker 1 (45:17):
I don't know. I mean I think she could. She'll
be like, wit, well that was supposed to be for me,
And now I got all the fucking Look at Joscelyn
with it.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
It smells like real other I don't, I don't.
Speaker 1 (45:27):
I'm sure it is. You're gonna just keep it on.
Jesus loves it is. Eric gonna be upset with me
now He's like, well, what the fuck? But you have
to say let him know this is this is a
big podcast budget show. We could afford these kind of things.
How many guests now now when girls are on this show,
they're gonna be where the fuck is my Saint Laurent back?
(45:49):
And I'm gonna be like, listen, you're not saving children's
lives every day like doctor Joscelyn. I mean, out of
all of her friends, I probably have the most love
for you because and some of her friends, especially her
new friends, her new Malibu friends, some of her friends.
You know no issue some of them. You're like people
(46:14):
always think that, like California is such a bubble. It's
like Malibu's is a weird bubble the other direction.
Speaker 2 (46:20):
I don't know that it is, all right, Jocelyn, I
love you.
Speaker 1 (46:24):
I don't love you anymore. Disgusting Casha, Hey, thank you,
doctor Jocelyn. What a delight. And guess what. My wife
(46:46):
is furious that I gave the gift away. Ah, that's
what I wanted. I wanted it to, you know, be funny.
And she was mad. She was like, are you are
you kidding me? Turns out it would have been a
good gift for my wife. Turns turns out she would
have loved it. Guess what, Jocen's not giving it up.
(47:10):
That's what I like. All Right, let's do our segment ready, Buddy,
Hello from Toss Show. That's where we say hello to
one of our subscribers. Now this week we are saying
hi to Lorna in Savannah. Now she's not a subscriber,
but her husband, Carl. He's a big fan Carl. His
name's Carl, but he spells his with a K. You
(47:31):
spell yours with a C. Okay, you don't care anyway,
he's just hoping that this shotout will make his wife
Lorna get on the Tosh train. Well, Laurna, I've never
said that word before. You ever said you know anybody
named Laurna? No, Lorna's I've never met a Lorna. I'm
excited now, Laura. We hope you, We hope you come aboard.
(47:55):
I don't know Lorna. Laurna and Carl, that's that sounds
like a real Georgia couple. We gotta do some plugs.
Tossshowstore dot com. Get some of that sweet Toss Show merch.
There you go, Carl, Welcome back, ADDIE's Tour, Daniel's Tour.
Check out our dates. This week it's free plug. Let's
(48:18):
go hit the free plug music. That's just some vintage
library rock music right there. This week's free plug. Believe
it or not, we're doing bowling again.
Speaker 2 (48:31):
Nice.
Speaker 1 (48:32):
I've never I've never seen a bowling commercial in my
life here on Toss Show. This is the second time
we've plugged bowling. All right. It's in beautiful Pacifica, California
for the dry January Sober social. Oh that just rolls
off the tongue. Too dry. No, alcohol. Nothing better than
bowling and sobriety. It's a substance free gathering. It's designed
(48:57):
for those committed to staying sober throughout the month the month.
I never get why people do things for one month
and then they're back. What a weird increment of time. Anyway,
they are offering a refreshing way to connect with others
who are taking the Dry January pledge? Is that a thing?
People aren't drinking in January? That's the thing? Is that
(49:19):
just like a New Year's thing? And then you realize,
oh well, no, wonder this month is so depressing. We've
been sober the whole time. It join us for dinner
and bowling. Okay, so they're gonna have dinner. Oh man,
what's that meal? What's that meal gonna be? Anyway, it's
a Dry January Sober social bowling plus dinner, January twenty fourth,
from six to nine pm. How many How many frames
(49:42):
can you bowl in a three hour window? Sixty? What?
Speaker 2 (49:49):
Three hours?
Speaker 1 (49:50):
At least? Nine? Wait? Is frames a game? O?
Speaker 2 (49:53):
Wait?
Speaker 1 (49:53):
I'm going to complete games? Nine would be ninety frames? Right? No? Okay?
How many games?
Speaker 2 (49:58):
I would say nine?
Speaker 1 (49:59):
Ye. I've never bowled more than two games in my life.
I can't imagine wanting to go continue to keep bowling.
Speaker 2 (50:05):
Three hours is a lot long.
Speaker 1 (50:07):
Well, I don't even care about the time. I just meant.
I was just referring to nine games, all right, Anyway,
more information, visit Stanford Beers, no Peers that'd be weird
Stanford Peers, or sober underscored Stanford. See you next week.
How easy would it be to switch babies on someone
in the hospital?
Speaker 2 (00:03):
Easy?
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Yeah, Oh God, damn it? Cashaw Cosha show up show.
Hey guys. Dan Tosh here, host of Toss Show twenty five.
Happy New Year. We're one weekend and I got to
(00:27):
tell you, honestly, this year sucks. It's been bad since
day one. I mean, what what happened? Oh, nothing happened.
Just a gut feeling you, just a feeling about this,
just a gut feeling that it's going to be a
rough one. I went down to the beach and I filmed.
I don't even tell you I filmed something here. I'll
just play it for you. Period a second. Trump sucks, Dix,
(00:54):
that's a crisis, kid, How would hear it?
Speaker 2 (00:58):
Both of those things?
Speaker 1 (00:59):
Now? Well, I'm not a handwriting analysis expert, but did
you think the guy that was writing christ Is King
also wrote the other one?
Speaker 2 (01:10):
I man, I want to imagine so God.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
I want to imagine so too. That just be real funny.
I wonder if a handwriting expert could look at something
written in the sand and take something away from it.
That's what we got to find out. We got to
get a handwriting analysis expert on this show to tell
me if the man that wrote Trump sucks dis is
the same that wrote christ Is King. Both messages have
(01:35):
a strong opinion.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:37):
What if there's a world where's like two people out
there writing messages in the sand. Yeah, no, it's it's
it's funny to think of them doing it at the
same time and looking over at each other. What do
you have. I'm writing Trump sucks dicks and that guy's like, oh,
I'm writing christ Is King. Oh that's good too. Let's
go ahead, breakfast, little nail on head. If you ask me,
(01:59):
it's funny when you see something that somebody writes on
the beach and you're like, ah, that's funny. Speaking of
saying goodbye to twenty twenty four and good riddance. By
the way, my wife we've been talking regularly about sitting
across from me. She seems to be receptive, all right. Now. Now,
(02:21):
if my wife backs out of the deal somehow, and
Lord knows she's capable of screwing things up, I thought, well,
what better replacement than today's guest, my wife's childhood best friend, doctor,
neonatal nurse practitioner. Oh, it's a good day here. Enjoy Tasha,
(02:48):
my guest today, has seen a lot despite a humble,
white trash upbringing in Florida. She is now a neonatal
nurse practitioner with a PhD. She's also my wife's best
friend and they share many secrets that they had planned
to take to the grave. Please welcome doctor Jocelyn.
Speaker 2 (03:09):
Hi.
Speaker 1 (03:10):
Are you nervous?
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Very?
Speaker 1 (03:11):
But it's the best, Jos. This is a special day
for me to have you in the hot seat now, Jocelyn,
many people might not know you. I believe were The
very first hello from Toss Show was to you. Yes,
but you're my wife's best friend. Ah, that's silly. Well,
(03:32):
I mean, it's debatable if you're her best friend because
you guys have a little click. I don't know the
pecking order exactly, but we'll get to it eventually. Do
you believe in ghosts?
Speaker 2 (03:42):
I lived with the ghost ones you did? Yes? When
when I lived in Canada, our apartment was haunted like it.
I don't know how to explain, but we would wake
up in the middle of the night to like water
being turned on like full blast, and then it would
shut off, and then it would turn on blast and
shut off. One time we were like telling a friend
(04:04):
that the water kept turning on and off in the
middle of the night, and as we were explaining it
to him in like broad daylight, the water in the
bathroom like turned on full blast.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
Oh that's good. That was good of some validation. Yep,
are you Canadian?
Speaker 2 (04:17):
Half Canadian?
Speaker 1 (04:18):
Were you born in Canada?
Speaker 2 (04:20):
No? I was born in Florida.
Speaker 1 (04:22):
Okay, So you and my wife you met in fourth grade? Yes,
So you guys met in fourth grade and you had
the same boyfriend. No, wait, you wanted to switch boyfriends
in fourth grade.
Speaker 2 (04:35):
We went to different elementary schools. Oh, but they had
like one community fourth grade dance and.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Your the fourth grade dance. They allowed fourth grades to dance.
Speaker 2 (04:45):
I guess.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
That seems weird, okay.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
And they at that dance, that's where I met her,
and she asked me if we would trade boyfriends.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
So the first time you met her was her saying, hey,
can we trade boyfriends?
Speaker 2 (04:58):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (04:58):
Who was the guy she was with?
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Ian Sharp?
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Ian Shark a famous Now I know Ian Sharp only
only through folklore. Him and his brother. His brother's name
was Madison. Yep, Madison Sharp. They were the best skim
boarders on the West coast of Florida. Oh, they could
skimboard and every every girl knew it. Which one of
(05:22):
them played Glycerin one time on the guitar. Ian Ian
Sharp played Glycerin on an acoustic guitar, and the girls
just just I don't I don't want to say this
because I don't know how old they were, but they
were turned on true or false?
Speaker 2 (05:40):
True?
Speaker 1 (05:40):
Okay, so you were with.
Speaker 2 (05:42):
Ian carl you were with a boy named Chip.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
A boy named Chip No One, and Charlie was like
fucking and she wanted to switch to Chip, and you
were like, yes, I will make this switch.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
I think I said no. You said no, yea, I
said no.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
But Chip, Chip's dead, right unfortunately? Yeah, yeah, that's that's
that's very unfortunate. Uh. He died in an ATV.
Speaker 2 (06:06):
Accident not long a couple of years after that.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
Now, my wife famously, in her family, they love to
fucking talk about it that she skipped third grade or
second grade, one of them, one of the meaningless grades.
They act like, oh, she's so gifted. She has to
a shitty Florida public school. She skipped a grade. I
tell you what if you can't skip a grade in Florida.
(06:32):
You might you might need to be tested anyway. All right, Carly, Yeah,
was my wife the valedictorian of her high school, and
you were a distant six. You were six, seventh, seventh,
You were in the top ten.
Speaker 2 (06:48):
Yeah, top ten.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
We know this because when all of them get together,
this little friend group, one of them Megan who's in Kentucky.
She didn't get into the top ten.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
I think she was eleven.
Speaker 1 (07:00):
Embarrassing. I know she finished eleventh in the class, which
I don't think they even they don't even recognize that. Yeah,
you're just you're just in the class. But now you
know you've graduated from Johns Hopkins. Do you think that
you are so much smarter than Carly?
Speaker 2 (07:17):
No, you don't know.
Speaker 1 (07:19):
Oh but you are.
Speaker 2 (07:20):
No, I don't think so.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
I asked Carly simple questions, and then when she doesn't answer,
I go the The fact that you call yourself a
valictorie is embarrassing.
Speaker 2 (07:29):
It is a Florida high school.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
I know, but she should be able to answer simple questions.
How old was my wife when she lost her Virginity.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
College college?
Speaker 1 (07:44):
Yeah, she didn't lose it in high school. No, that's
great to hear. Look, at that she's pristine. Oh my goodness,
there's so much tread on the tire before we get
into the fact that you're you know, you take care
of babies in the nick you the most traumatic time
(08:09):
for most parents, and you've done this for how long?
Speaker 2 (08:12):
Sixteen years?
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Sixteen years? That's actually a long time. Good for you.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Well, I was a nurse for five and then I've
been a nurse practitioner for eleven.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
I guess when did you get your PhD?
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Was it a DMP? I don't know if it matters, but.
Speaker 1 (08:27):
Was it k Are you a doctor?
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Yes, a doctorate of Nursing Practice, which is a little
bit different than.
Speaker 1 (08:33):
A that's what they make women get.
Speaker 2 (08:35):
No, those what that you make women get? That don't
like research.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
I just remember putting your report cards up on my refrigerator.
How long ago was that?
Speaker 2 (08:48):
Twenty nineteen? Okay, yeah, five years?
Speaker 1 (08:51):
I remember that. Before children, life was fun, Yeah, a
lot of them. Are you exhausted by the way today?
Speaker 2 (08:58):
No?
Speaker 1 (08:59):
She flew here today, all the way from Charlotte, North Carolina.
Do you hate Charlotte?
Speaker 2 (09:05):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (09:05):
When I first met you, you were you were doing
travel nursing a lot, so you would live in different places.
I believe when I first met you were living in Houston.
Maybe I didn't meet you when you lived in La. No,
you've lived in La You've lived in Seattle, You've lived
in Houston, yep. And at different points you've loved them
all and you've hated them all. Which cities in the
(09:28):
United States have the best hospital care for babies and mothers?
Speaker 2 (09:32):
The West Coast in a mile? Yeah? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (09:35):
What about New York?
Speaker 2 (09:36):
I think like the Boston New York area is pretty good,
but then the South is like there's actually the margin.
Dimes has a report card and if you look at
the report card, it's like pretty good, Like New Hampshire's
pretty good up in the northeast, and in the south
is just like a D and an F and that.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
Just speaks volumes. But huh, you can't tell them anything,
ken you. No, they've got everything figured out. Well. Enjoy
your coin flip. Okay, full term forty? When when does
the nick you? When is it mandatory that the baby
has to go to the Nike?
Speaker 2 (10:13):
You usually less than thirty, like under thirty five weeks
and under like two kilos or one point eight like
around four pounds. They would have to come to us.
But if you're thirty five or thirty six weeks and
you can like maintain your blood sugar, you can breathe
on your own, you can stay warm, then you would
(10:34):
stay with your parents.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Oh what a cutoff. Yeah, you got to make it
to thirty five weeks. Yeah, and anything before when you're like, oh,
that's not that's not gonna that's going to be a
lifetime of some some potential.
Speaker 2 (10:48):
We've gotten better, You've got.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
You can fix things.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
Yes, like we are. Science is a lot better now.
We take care of the baby's a lot better. So
like I used to think, like when I first started,
like twenty six weeks, was like, oh jeez, like I
hope they learn how to walk, And now like a
twenty two weeker can do all the things.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
What percentage of babies that are born before thirty weeks live.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
The further you are from term, the less likely you
are to survive. But even like a thirty weeker has
like a ninety over ninety five percent chance.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
Yeah, like they do really went five week old.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
Twenty five week er probably, I don't know the statistics
off the top of my head, but like really good survival.
But if they have more bid like different things wrong
with them because they were premature. It goes up higher
and higher the earlier you are born.
Speaker 1 (11:43):
Is there any age where it's like, no, that does
that's that's.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Twenty two weeks. I'm not going to try to Yeah,
twenty two and zero is the lowest we will save, okay,
or like attempt resuscitation, like offer to do something, and.
Speaker 1 (11:57):
That's anywhere in this country. You always used to joke
about when you were pregnant, like hey, go to Mexico
until you're from twenty to twenty eight weeks.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
I still would do that personally, but right, not twenty
eight but like twenty four weeks.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
Is the point that you were saying was sometimes in
this country we save children that we probably shouldn't, right,
And it's not shouldn't, but it's like, come on, like
nature's handling itself here, guys, right.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Well, it just doesn't take a lot to be a baby.
So like all they have to really do is breathe
and tolerate food. But it's hard to imagine what that
would be like as like a five year old, where
it's like they are all they're doing is what a
baby would do.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
What's the youngest baby you've delivered that you've seen.
Speaker 2 (12:46):
Survive twenty two and zero?
Speaker 1 (12:48):
Do you always try to break the record?
Speaker 2 (12:50):
No?
Speaker 1 (12:52):
No, I mean the thing with the pregnancies that you
just you're always like, oh, well, once I get once
I hear a heartbeat, and they're saying, well, no, you
got to get to the twenty one one where you
can really find out this, and then it's like no, no, no,
you got to make sure that they're at least thirty.
It's just there's just no end. That's the problem. And
my mom would argue, you know, who was a lifetime
nurse and she did pediatrics for a long time, but
(13:14):
would just be like, they love to do that when
an our day well and our day kids just died constantly.
But take that away. There is something too like oh
I'm pregnant and not knowing anything until oh I'm delivering.
Is there is some peace of mind in that. Well,
(13:35):
you can at least focus more on the excited stuff,
because like you, I try to get you excited about
stuff and you're like, well, yeah, but look at this,
this and this, and what if you're always like what
if their eyes aren't blue? You don't care about that.
How awful is it talking to these parents that were
(13:56):
so excited about having a baby, and then it's, oh.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
They're excited even if they're born premature. They are, I
mean they're sad for like the baby being born early,
but they're just very It's they get to celebrate a
bundred milestones that like a baby born at term they
would never get to, like breathing on your own or
like taking a bottle for the first time eight weeks
after you're born. Like, they're they're very excited.
Speaker 1 (14:20):
It's how many people is it? Is it like because
of drugs or anything like that.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
In Seattle, Seattle had more than other places like north
of Seattle. There's a lot of heroin there.
Speaker 1 (14:36):
Yeah, well no, I mean I figured as much. Yeah, yeah,
they get them all.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
Yeah, by the.
Speaker 1 (14:44):
Way, true or false, especially in Seattle. Yeah, a lot
of times people would come in delivering early because they
try to do a little recreational cocaine.
Speaker 2 (14:54):
Sometimes, Like cocaine is not that popular. Well it's not
like the drug of choice.
Speaker 1 (14:59):
Of course it's not. But if if you do cocaine
while you're.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
Pregnant, you can have as abruption.
Speaker 1 (15:04):
You hear that, guys, yes, don't let him do cocaine.
They're gonna have a baby. Have you ever played a
prank on the dad and brought a newborn that's a
different race, uh, to them and like, here's your baby.
All that'd be fun. You should do that one time.
Just bring over, bring over, especially because you're in the South,
(15:26):
go to some some real like good old boy, white
white man and just bring a little black baby over
and go, this is your baby and just watch his face.
Ought to be a good gag. And then be like,
you're on my prank show, Nick, you race bait. I'm not.
I'm workshopping. I don't like it. Nick, you should see
(15:50):
your face. That's better. How easy would it be to
switch babies on someone in the hospital? God damn it.
I mean we knew it. We knew it.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
It could be done, Yes, it could easily be done.
All newborns kind of look the same, like, I mean.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
Man, this is true. I don't think my kid's mine.
I've never wanted to spend fifty bucks on the little
DNA test I've seen, but maybe I should do it.
Your life outside of the hospital, hospital precision smart. You
know everything you do. Then you go home and you
might be the messiest person I've ever met.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
It's just comical. I've spent almost every holiday with you
since i've met you, the ones that I care about
that Thanksgiving, Christmas were usually together.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (16:39):
Then you had to go and ruin everything, and you know,
you got a man. For the longest time, you were like,
I'm just I'm just you know you were you were
so weird about who you were interested in. I want
to date Wayne Gretzky. I don't know what you said.
I was just like some hockey star or something from Canada,
(17:00):
sem like somebody that you'd like. Okay, is that silly?
Speaker 2 (17:02):
It's really.
Speaker 1 (17:04):
But then then you then you met your current boyfriend,
and true or false when you met him, he was
in a healthy marriage.
Speaker 2 (17:13):
It wasn't healthy, but he was married legally. Yeah, so
it took a while.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
They were separated.
Speaker 2 (17:18):
They were separated, they were like in the process of
a divorce. Okay, they still had like shared custody of
their dogs.
Speaker 1 (17:23):
And how long did you wait before having a child
with him?
Speaker 2 (17:28):
Fifteen months?
Speaker 1 (17:29):
Oh really?
Speaker 2 (17:30):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (17:31):
Oh wow? Why in my head was it so much shorter?
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Well, I mean ten of nine of those months is
growing a human.
Speaker 1 (17:41):
So you got how quick did you go pregnant?
Speaker 2 (17:44):
Now I got to give right, six months?
Speaker 1 (17:47):
Six months? That's okay, you sneaky, sneaky. Ah. And then
you guys had a child. Ah that changed everything?
Speaker 2 (17:55):
Yes? Is that fun having a child?
Speaker 1 (17:58):
Yeah? Yeah, you've feel better at work now that you
have a child. That because did people ever be like, oh,
you don't have a child? Did people ever ask.
Speaker 2 (18:06):
No, No, they would, Nobody ever asked. But I do
find it harder to be at work now, Like I
always like thought it was somebody's like, this is someone's
child that we're like doing these harm like like a
Lombard puncture or something super painful. It's a like a
spinal tap, like where you put a needle in their spine.
But now when I have to do it, I'm like,
(18:26):
this is somebody's child, Like it like actually like wears
on me. It's hard for me to do my job
now that I've had a child.
Speaker 1 (18:33):
Yeah, that's tough. There's something something I was seeing your
kid go in and have any procedure where you're like,
oh this isn't right.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
You know what I used to like about you, what
you disappear for six months. Where is she? And then
I'd be like, oh, she's in Thailand. You used to
travel like a crazy person?
Speaker 2 (18:50):
I did.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
Yeah, just by yourself. Yeah, and just like yeah, I'll
figure things out.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:56):
That's always That's always impressed me because I could never
do it. I mean I guess, I guess I probably could.
I don't know. It terrifies me. You like traveling the
world by yourself?
Speaker 2 (19:06):
I yeah, I really liked it. It was I mean,
we was. I would go to places that were supposed
to be safe for girls to travel by themselves.
Speaker 1 (19:13):
Well, what blog do you look up for that?
Speaker 2 (19:16):
There's actually one called the Blonde Abroad, which is about
like solo female traveling.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
And that helped you.
Speaker 2 (19:22):
Yeah, I followed a lot.
Speaker 1 (19:23):
Of you had you never had any problems.
Speaker 2 (19:26):
The only like scary thing that I had was in
New Zealand, which is a super safe country.
Speaker 1 (19:33):
Super safe.
Speaker 2 (19:34):
I was in like a camper van for three weeks
and I was in some random coastal town and I
could we're.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
In the South Island. I was in southist South Island's
creepy as shit, Northland. South Island's beautiful.
Speaker 2 (19:46):
It's beautiful.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
Fucking the people in the South Island are fucking weird.
Christ Church is creepy. Okay, yeah, it's all stupid.
Speaker 2 (19:53):
Yes. But then I was like walking on a boardwalk
and I could feel somebody following me. And then I
turned down a street where it was like all w
windows in the building and I could see his reflection,
and so it turned into like a pizza place, and
he stopped and waited outside, and I don't know what
like possessed me to like go back out, and I
could see where my hotel was, so I just like ran,
but he started running too, but thinkfully went inside before
(20:16):
he he started running too. Creep That was the only
creepy thing that happened to me.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
That if you dropped something and he was just trying
to give it back.
Speaker 2 (20:22):
No, he was not trying to get it back.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
Huh did you poop in that van? No? He had
a bathroom, didn't it Uh?
Speaker 2 (20:29):
I think it did.
Speaker 1 (20:30):
You don't drink water? I do drink, Yeah, it's full.
You don't pee and you don't drink water? Is that true?
Speaker 2 (20:38):
I mean I used so many times a day? Do
you pee like three? I'm a nurse. We don't get
to pee that much at work.
Speaker 1 (20:45):
She never peas. Guys, I know everything about her. She
never peas.
Speaker 2 (20:49):
It's so baffrom we don't get breaks at work or like,
can you give a step.
Speaker 1 (20:53):
In the middle of the night to pee?
Speaker 2 (20:54):
No? I know no, but if you start doing it
becomes like a habit. Your body gets used.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
Oh I p constantly, So you tell me I should stop.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
And started that.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
Yeah, it's my fault that I think.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (21:05):
When you're a doctor, you should fucking know.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Pen's not a habit.
Speaker 1 (21:09):
She says, peen's a habit middle of the night. Pens.
She's saying, it's not my bladder.
Speaker 2 (21:14):
I could be wrong.
Speaker 1 (21:15):
No, you're definitely wrong. But who cares true or false?
Before I started dating my wife, she said, why would
he date me? He only dates supermodels.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
That is true. Carly denies it.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
My wife denies that she ever said that. You say
it's true.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
It is true.
Speaker 1 (21:33):
I will one hundred percent tell that story to my
children when they get older, bragging. I'll be like, look
at this.
Speaker 2 (21:39):
But your wife is a supermodel.
Speaker 1 (21:41):
So if supermodels were five two and didn't make any
money modeling, would you say that you love me as
a brother, as a human?
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (21:52):
Have you ever said I love you to me? No,
do you think that you're allowed to? Do you think
that we will? What if we just started saying it
to each other? Do you think do you think Carly
would think it's weird?
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Probably not.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Okay, let's play a game of f Mary Kill. You
know how to play it?
Speaker 2 (22:05):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (22:06):
Okay me?
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Oh gosh, m hm.
Speaker 1 (22:10):
Your friend Megan's husband and your friend Jess's husband.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Ok.
Speaker 1 (22:16):
So it's so it's her, it's her four, it's these
childhood friends. She's got to play f Mary Kill with
her her friend's partners.
Speaker 2 (22:23):
Go ahead, Oh no, I would marry you winter winter
and then kill the rest.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
Look at her trying to take it the easy way out.
I'll bet you you and uh Megan's husband would have
a great time in bed. I've since iPhones have allowed tracking,
I've I've had I've tracked you. Yeah, because I've always
been like terrified that you were going to be you know, taken. Yes,
(22:58):
but there is nothing I would be able to do.
Like if that guy would have got you in the
South Island in New Zealand, I'd have been like, well,
I know where she is. I mean, I guess I
could kill it for I would call authorities.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
It is creepy getting a text from you though, at
like eleven o'clock at night, being like go home. The
Lincoln Memorial is so creepy at night, And I'm like, what,
how do you know where I am?
Speaker 1 (23:19):
You can turn it off, you can disable it. Now
I have to set up your life for a second. Okay,
you know, here you go. You knew this was coming.
So because some people they look at you, they probably say, oh,
look at that. She's just a charmed life. But you've
you've had some obstacles in your life. Okay, your mother
and your father. Your mother, how do I put it nicely?
(23:41):
She had an addiction problem. Yeah, not right away, not
right away. No, she was young.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
She was young. She was like twenty okay when she
had Yeah, she had my sister and I like got
nineteen and twenty one or something like that.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
Yeah, okay, your father was in the picture, not really
in the picture.
Speaker 2 (23:58):
I think they got divorced when I was like ten
months old, is I think what my mom is? So
they were married, they were married? Yeah what my mom
was a few months pregnant with my sister when they
got married.
Speaker 1 (24:08):
Oh that old story. Uh, huh. Okay, here's the thing,
your childhood. I'm sure when you reflect on it is like,
oh my goodness, this was so ridiculous what I went through.
What you know, other kids had so such normal families.
But like Crrently, when she reflects back on your mother,
(24:32):
she's like, oh, but but we all thought she was
the fun mom. Yeah, you know, because you would go
to your house and they would put i don't know,
shaving cream all over the trampoline. That seems like a
memory that stood out to my wife.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Yes, But then like because my mom was a kid herself,
she would let us like jump off the roof onto
the trampoline that had soap all over it.
Speaker 1 (24:54):
Okay, so was bad. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:55):
I mean it's like in the moment, it was fun
and I didn't know anything different, But now it was
like an adult looking back, like I would never let
my daughter jump off a roof onto a trampoline with
soap on.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
It's a bad idea.
Speaker 2 (25:06):
So she like kind of went off crazy in like
two thousand and two thousand and one.
Speaker 1 (25:12):
She's an alcoholic, she's bipolar.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
She's bipolar. She was kind of got mixed up in
that like dope sick, opioid crisis. She like ripped a
rotator cuff and they gave her oxy cotton in like
two thousand when they were like prescribing it because they
didn't know how addictive it was. So she was like
that genre of drug addict.
Speaker 1 (25:29):
Your mother one time, you, I, is this true? You
were marrying somebody on some mountain. Oh yeah, and your
mom you had always paid for her, uh to have
a cell phone or something like that, and she was unhoused.
She was bouncing around the Southwest, and she found out
(25:50):
how to get into the account, and she locked you
out of the account. She ended up purchasing a bunch
of stuff an iPad got it closed you out of
your accoun and you just happened to be off grid
in a mountain and couldn't find your way back, and
now you were locked out of your phone.
Speaker 2 (26:09):
Yeah that's true.
Speaker 1 (26:10):
Oh that was great. Yeah, that's just a real lesson
and helping out. Yeah, how'd you break the code?
Speaker 2 (26:16):
I stopped at a Verizon. Like by the time I
got down the mountain and drove like an hour and
a half, there was like a Verizon store that I
went into and I had to show my ID and
they finally let me back in.
Speaker 1 (26:29):
They turned your phone back on? Did they turn hers off?
Speaker 2 (26:31):
Oh? No?
Speaker 1 (26:32):
So does she still have a phone under your account?
Speaker 2 (26:35):
She doesn't. But I did pay for that iPad for
like two years.
Speaker 1 (26:38):
Why it seemed like you could have paid it off quicker.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
No no, no, like the monthly service, like the oh.
Speaker 1 (26:43):
For two years she got? Oh she scammed you.
Speaker 2 (26:46):
Good in.
Speaker 1 (26:50):
Verizon. Verizon, come on, man.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
The Verizon in Taos, New Mexico. It was this very
specific store that was very much like, we can't help you.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
I'm a customer of Verizon and they don't credit you.
How much do you think all in you paid?
Speaker 2 (27:03):
I don't know. Because the crazy thing was is that
back then you would call it four one one if
you needed a phone number.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
I remember information, okay.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
But if you call it now, it's like two ninety nine.
And because she's like manic, like, she would call it
like twenty five times in a day, She's calling four
to one one.
Speaker 1 (27:20):
What number does she need?
Speaker 2 (27:21):
I don't know, but she would call it over and
over again. So my bills would be crazy high because
she was calling four one. She didn't know you could
like google something.
Speaker 1 (27:29):
I just feel like you've got grounds for some type
of lawsuits or reimbursement to Verizon. I don't think the
mentally unstable should be able to rack those kind of
bills up.
Speaker 2 (27:40):
Definitely not.
Speaker 1 (27:41):
I mean, I think we're glossing over how ridiculous your
childhood was. She did at one point live in a tree.
Speaker 2 (27:46):
Yeah, she did.
Speaker 1 (27:47):
And then again this isn't we're not making light of it.
How was she living in a tree?
Speaker 2 (27:53):
So, I don't know. I think she that was just
where she ended up, and that was where she could
get cells service where she wherever she was like the
highest point. Yeah, and she would just like call me
from her tree.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
Also, she also liked one time thought there's bugs coming
out of her body a lot.
Speaker 2 (28:10):
She still thinks that.
Speaker 1 (28:11):
She thinks there's bugs inside it.
Speaker 2 (28:13):
Yeah. I think that's like a side effect of doing math.
Speaker 1 (28:15):
But huh, they don't talk about that on the meth campaigns.
She had another child. You have a half brother who's
was illegally blind.
Speaker 2 (28:26):
Yes, you say illegally blind. Legally okay, legally blind blind.
He's blind. He doesn't have eyes. His eyes are glass.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
He doesn't have eyes, his glass instead of eyes. Okay,
I don't.
Speaker 2 (28:36):
I don't think I knew that, Oh, well, he was
premature and your eyes are like very underdeveloped when you
were first born, and so his never developed. And so
to like make his face be able to develop normally,
they put in glass eyes.
Speaker 1 (28:49):
Yeah, now you guys think, oh, that's got to be
the interesting thing that you brought up, not even not
even remotely what I thought was the interesting thing. But
now that I've learned about these glass eyes. He became
a figurehead in what church? What religion do you even know?
Speaker 2 (29:07):
Well, they're Catholic, but I don't think it was Catholic.
Speaker 1 (29:09):
Okay, it was. It was just it was just in
some Christianity, some church. He became a singer as a child.
And this is when yar is like, what the church
is so suspect, don't even get Jocelyn started on her beliefs.
She believes in ghosts. Do you believe in God? Don't answer.
But he would tour and he would play like arenas, Yeah, singing,
(29:34):
he wasn't, And it was just people were just like
why were they fascinated with him as a singer?
Speaker 2 (29:40):
I think because of his story, Like he would tell
his story of he was born to a drug addict mom,
he lost his eyesight because he was premature. And then
he's also autistic. And when kids are autistic, they can
often sing in perfect pitch.
Speaker 1 (29:51):
Could he sing it perfect pitch? Oh? He could. Here's
why I think I didn't think. I didn't think it
was amazing.
Speaker 2 (29:56):
No, But when he was younger, I think it was
the whole story. It wasn't just his voice, okay.
Speaker 1 (30:00):
Because well you said in perfect pitch and I was
always like, I don't think this is perfect. But yeah,
you're saying. But now he's kind of aged out of that,
and does he perform still or No?
Speaker 2 (30:10):
I don't think he still does like motivational speaking, okay,
and like telling his story and but no, I don't
think he sings it.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
I feel like the church and this is just me
and I'm I'm you know, I'm super hypocritical of the
church a lot of times, but I feel like they
were kind of using a kid.
Speaker 2 (30:27):
It was a good story. It's sold. I know that
millions of views and that.
Speaker 1 (30:31):
I mean the kid was popular. Guys like it was.
It was off the charts type of stuff. Did you
feel drawn to this profession because of your childhood.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
Probably a little bit like growing up Carly and I
would actually we had this like plan that we were
going to be an obstetrician and a pediatrician and one
was going to deliver the babies and the other one
was going to take care of them. And then once
Christopher was born, it like opened up this whole world
of like, oh, babies actually can be born sick and
early and not on time. I'm not healthy. And then
(31:01):
that's what kind of like introduced me to the nick you.
I didn't know it existed actually before then.
Speaker 1 (31:06):
And then there was just just that's what I'm gonna do.
It's pretty neat to have a clear vision of what
you want to do with your life. Yeah, that's the
only thing in your life that's just completely focused.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (31:18):
The rest of it just mm hmmmm. Yep. Do you
brag to your friends who don't live in Hollywood about
the time you slept on a pie at Leonardo DiCaprio's house. I? Yeah,
Have you ever told that story to any of your
your friends?
Speaker 2 (31:37):
No? I don't think people would believe me. If I okay.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
To be there, I'll tell you the story. You ready
for this? I rented Leonard. I've rented it multiple times.
Leonardo DiCaprio has an income property that he uses occasionally.
Got to pick a ball court in Palm Springs And
one morning, you know, she's in this house. We're all
in this house. And one morning I see her. I said, hey,
did you enjoy that slice of pie I gave you
(32:03):
last night? And she's like, what are you talking about?
And I go, I put a slice of pie under
your pillow, you know, as you would do. Yeah, pie pillow.
Speaker 2 (32:12):
It was still in the pie container though, No, no
it wasn't.
Speaker 1 (32:16):
It was on a plate. You're wrong, revisionist history. Really
it was on a plate. I put a plate with
a slice of pie. There's a plateless and I put
your pillow on top of it.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:27):
So she's like, no, you didn't, And I go, Jocely,
I fucking put a slice of pie under your pillow.
What in the did you? Then I thought maybe she
slept in a different room. We go to her room.
It smells like fucking pie. As soon as you open
the door, it smells like pie. And I lift the
pillow up. She she sleeps. Literally, this person doesn't pee
(32:50):
because she doesn't move just perfectly, still doesn't put her
hands under the pillow and there's a perfectly smushed pie
under her pillow. What kind of pie? I don't fucking remember.
It was pumpkin. It was pumpkin because I hate pumpkin,
and I did nobody ate it. And she probably made
me order it in the first place for Thanksgiving. It
was for Thanksgiving?
Speaker 2 (33:11):
Were there?
Speaker 1 (33:12):
That reminds me of another time? Go ahead, I was.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
Singing a different pie.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
Oh, one time she baked me a pie. It was
like a fruit cobbler.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
Did strawberry rubber.
Speaker 1 (33:25):
Strawberry rubarbie. You did your own crust. It was delicious.
It was for the Fourth of July. And this was
back when Twitter wasn't run by that dipshit. And I
posted a photo of you holding my pie and wrote
something stupid underneath.
Speaker 2 (33:40):
It and embarrassing, embarrassing.
Speaker 1 (33:43):
I was trying to find you a man. You were
always manless. It was just so depressing h anyway, But
I never wanted you to have a man, because it
was like you were our throupple. It's always fun to
travel with you because it was like just me and
my wife and you and and everything. By having kids
and you having a partner. Now you were in a
(34:03):
hospital working in Seattle, No, in La. I was in
it was La.
Speaker 2 (34:09):
Yeah, I was on a travel assignment.
Speaker 1 (34:11):
Okay, I thought it was Seattle, No.
Speaker 2 (34:13):
Because it was like the next night, like it was
fourth of July. And then the next night I went
back to work and my parents of my patient, who
were like very shy and like sort of embarrassed to
ask me, They were like, is this you? And they
brought up this embarrassing photo that you had tweeted of
me holding a pie and like a bathing suit top
and all these horrible comments under it about like what
(34:34):
people wanted to poke in my pie?
Speaker 1 (34:36):
And that's delightful. Well, that's that's good that they followed
me back then.
Speaker 2 (34:42):
Yeah, they were excited.
Speaker 1 (34:44):
But oh, man, do you remember the time I filled
your suitcase with shrimp scampy? She was leaving my house. Yes,
she was leaving Tahoe. And before she left, I had
taken her suitcase, which is always just the biggest suitcase
you've ever seen. It's just you know, at the seam,
(35:07):
zipper rip it whatever. I just and it had a
lot of pockets hidden there. So I just individually ran
wrapped a couple dozen shrimp scampies. Yeah, and placed them
like in her geen pocket, in a in the bottom
of a shoe in And then I unzipped the lining
of the of the suitcase and put some scampy inside
there and zipped it back, just tons of scampy. So,
(35:29):
because I wanted this joke to play out over time,
it did.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
Like months months we started finding them, like in line
to check in our bag, our shrimp scammy bag. But
then like six months later, I still found one rogue
shrimp scammy when I went to use that suitcase again.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
Did you eat it?
Speaker 2 (35:49):
No? It smelled horrible.
Speaker 1 (35:53):
Do you keep the luggage?
Speaker 2 (35:54):
No? I don't think. No, I don't have that SUITCA.
Speaker 1 (35:57):
That is that is good stuff. You can't beat the
old shrimp scampy gag.
Speaker 2 (36:02):
Yeah, that's pretty good.
Speaker 1 (36:03):
This is exciting a Toss Show first, Okay, you guys
ready for this? Eddie? Just go? Do you wanna? Do
you wanna? You want to hit me with a drum
roll or something? Okay? What do you? What's what's new
in your world? Right now?
Speaker 2 (36:23):
We're expecting number two.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
Doctor Joscelyn is pregnant right now with her second child.
It's a first on the Toss Show. An exclusive this
is where you want to announce it. Now, don't tell anyone, okay,
and just let us air this and just wait for
all the love to come pouring it. Are you as
(36:49):
excited as I am? Am I more excited.
Speaker 2 (36:51):
I'm way more excited.
Speaker 1 (36:52):
I couldn't be more excited. An amazing mother. You're gonna
it's gonna be so good. And you know what else
is gonna be. It's gonna be so fun for your
Oh my goodness, that's so great. I couldn't be happier.
I think it's gonna be the best thing in the world.
This one's gonna be so much easier.
Speaker 2 (37:09):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (37:10):
Are you excited about being pregnant?
Speaker 2 (37:12):
No, you're not. No Ah, My first pregnancy was horrible.
Speaker 1 (37:17):
Ah, but we still had fun.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
We did.
Speaker 1 (37:20):
You came up, You came up to tower right away.
You're like, yeah, yeah, it start out back. This one
just nothing but good signs. Okay, I can't imagine anything
bad happens. We're gonna have to re edit this fucking
I'm so happy that you're having another child. Not for
a few reasons. One of the reasons I'm so excited
is because you my daughter, Okay, my beautiful daughter, I
(37:45):
have spent maybe six dollars on clothes for her. And
the reason I've only spent six dollars is because you
you spend so much, You buy so much clothes for
your daughter, and then you say it to us once
she outgrows it, and then I give it on to
other people whenever we whenever we can. But now I'm
(38:08):
going to get to give it all back to you.
And there's just I mean, it's crazy how much stuff
you buy.
Speaker 2 (38:16):
I've cut back.
Speaker 1 (38:17):
You buy every color that it. You know, I'll get
into that in a minute, but you do you buy
the same thing though, I'll look at it. Oh, there's
five of these. I just the other day got something
from you where you had sent four or five new
sets of pajamas.
Speaker 2 (38:34):
Oh that was.
Speaker 1 (38:37):
And why and.
Speaker 2 (38:38):
Because, you know, because when I ordered that Cecily story.
But when I ordered the pajamas, they got lost. So
the company sent me a whole new order and then said,
if your other order shows up, pass it along to someone. Okay, yeah,
so that was.
Speaker 1 (38:51):
So you bought six pair, you got six pair, and
then another six showed up and you sent them on
to us. Oh, well, that makes a little more sense.
It's just all the time. I'm just like, every time
a box comes from you, I'm just like, God, damn it.
Why does there so much clothes? What does your daughter's
closet look like?
Speaker 2 (39:08):
There's not a lot in it? Really, Yeah, I give
it all away, Okay.
Speaker 1 (39:13):
Yeah, but I mean it's just at some point it
has to be filled, has be gridlocked. Everybody's on the
show gets gifts. Now. One of your gifts is I'm
so excited about this because, oh, this is only we'll
see how I can use this.
Speaker 2 (39:27):
Every week I watch you just like give away everything
I gave to you.
Speaker 1 (39:33):
That is hysterical, so Jocelyn. Multiple times on this show,
the gifts that I've given away have been gifts that
she gave me. The first thing I'm gonna give you
back this was bought for you. Yes, okay, my wife
and her friends went together and I'm told that this
(39:53):
is very expensive, yes, like five hundred dollars, and then
you gave it to us. Yes, and I'm giving.
Speaker 2 (40:01):
It back to you.
Speaker 1 (40:02):
Oh, this is going to be great. Are you excited
to use it again?
Speaker 2 (40:05):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (40:06):
By the way, we didn't use this one that much,
did I liked another one?
Speaker 2 (40:09):
It was super comfy, though.
Speaker 1 (40:10):
I didn't like it. It's also looks that stupid logo
I hated it. Is that? Is that a fancy brand?
What's it called?
Speaker 2 (40:19):
I think it's pronounced.
Speaker 1 (40:24):
Give us free ship? All right, so that's yours again.
This is Carle's she liked it, Yes, and inside there.
Watch look at this. I think it's I think I
saw this this morning. I just look at this Target.
Speaker 2 (40:40):
Gift card perfect, Okay, Okay.
Speaker 1 (40:43):
I don't know if there's any money on it or not.
But this is in my closet. This is, you know,
a new baby bag. There might be a pacifier in there,
who knows. Okay, Okay, Now when I get to regive
all your clothes, I want you to when we find
out the gender of your baby.
Speaker 2 (41:00):
I don't want to find out you don't. Eric does, well,
of course he does.
Speaker 1 (41:04):
That's normal.
Speaker 2 (41:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
Well, when we find out if it's the day that
they are born, uh, you know, if it's a girl,
I am going to unload hell on you. Okay, I'm
gonna send everything. I just want to give an example.
By the way, I got some stuff in here. I
want to this is a real bad outfit here for
for Eric. I want him to wear this. It's it's
(41:27):
it's James purse. But it's matching pants and shirt. It's bad.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
Nice, it looks awful.
Speaker 1 (41:32):
But make him wear that. And there's a shirt for him.
Oh thanks, Okay, but this is what This is just
a I want people when I say I'm gonna give
her trunks full of clothes bag, this is the thing.
Everything that she would give us tonally is brown's. You
only wanted your daughter to ever be in like muted
brown color. Why is that?
Speaker 2 (41:53):
I don't know, but she was kind of delayed in
learning her colors, and I always thought it was because
I didn't put her in like any primary colors.
Speaker 1 (42:01):
Every rainbow that you give is like a shade of
brown rainbows.
Speaker 2 (42:05):
Confused.
Speaker 1 (42:06):
Okay, so here you get these. Let's just let's do
you want what would you want for what sex? Boy
or girl? I don't hunt, you have no preference.
Speaker 2 (42:16):
No, just healthy, just good for you.
Speaker 1 (42:18):
You get it, And I say, I'm never that way.
I've always like, I just wanted a healthy girl and
then I got a healthy boy. Kind of kind of all.
Speaker 2 (42:25):
Right, okay, thank.
Speaker 1 (42:27):
You, hold on so much more stuff? Okay, this, oh
this because you travel so much dumb ship. This is
a travel rail okay to put on a bed.
Speaker 2 (42:39):
Perfect for your girl she needs.
Speaker 1 (42:42):
Now, yes, exactly. So Now when we travel this week,
she won't fall out because I have different things that
I use. Also, I don't give a fuck if my
kid falls out anymore. I'm like, just hit your head, buddy.
Speaker 2 (42:52):
She fell out of the bed last night. Actually, no,
you go.
Speaker 1 (42:54):
Now, you got this. I use this on tour, on
the tour buses all the time. Okay, that's it. Okay, now,
so excited are you excited for? You excited for the best,
the best one of my regifts? Okay, So I have
already uh finished Christmas shopping for my wife. Do I
(43:16):
buy my wife good gifts?
Speaker 2 (43:18):
Very good gifts?
Speaker 1 (43:19):
Good? Yeah, I'm a good gift gift Okay, so I
got them wrapped. I'm like, well, guess what, because you
were gonna be on the show, I'm like, this is hysterical.
I'm going to give you one of the gifts that
I had just bought my wife that she hasn't even
opened yet.
Speaker 2 (43:37):
Right, that's super exciting. Now, oh.
Speaker 1 (43:45):
You know that brand? Look at that Oh are you
so excited? Go ahead open that gift up see if
you liked it. That just scratched. How did a bag
scratch the table? It doesn't matter.
Speaker 2 (44:00):
I'm I'm o. Winning is really awkward because I was trying.
Speaker 1 (44:03):
To me about with you get it the box out.
Oh look at this Saint Laurent box.
Speaker 2 (44:09):
Okay, but what's in it for real scampy? Yeah, probably
Saint Lawn jacket.
Speaker 1 (44:15):
I'm not afraid to put. I'm not afraid to put
scampy in Saint Laurn.
Speaker 2 (44:19):
It's actually in it.
Speaker 1 (44:22):
Oh, there's so many boxes and bags when you get
a Saint Laurn.
Speaker 2 (44:27):
Oh wow, No, I know it's an actual bag.
Speaker 1 (44:29):
I know. Well, wait, you need here's my thing. You
need a big tote for the for the new one,
and and nothing better than like a sexy, cute one.
Speaker 2 (44:40):
Yeah, it's beautiful.
Speaker 1 (44:42):
No, it is, and it's the It's the it bag
right now, is what Carrie told me. Oh really, Carrie's like,
this is the it bag. Oh man, are you so
excited now? You're you're excited for your baby. By the way,
You're not even gonna take care of it. You're gonna
fill it full of your dumb fucking granola bars that
you eat at work and there's diapers and swaddles, and
(45:04):
I'll get that off of this. Look at that bag,
you guys, Oh, my wife is gonna be fucking furious.
Speaker 2 (45:13):
Well, she'll be excited if you decide to go in
the same direction for her.
Speaker 1 (45:17):
I don't know. I mean I think she could. She'll
be like, wit, well that was supposed to be for me,
And now I got all the fucking Look at Joscelyn
with it.
Speaker 2 (45:24):
It smells like real other I don't, I don't.
Speaker 1 (45:27):
I'm sure it is. You're gonna just keep it on.
Jesus loves it is. Eric gonna be upset with me
now He's like, well, what the fuck? But you have
to say let him know this is this is a
big podcast budget show. We could afford these kind of things.
How many guests now now when girls are on this show,
they're gonna be where the fuck is my Saint Laurent back?
(45:49):
And I'm gonna be like, listen, you're not saving children's
lives every day like doctor Joscelyn. I mean, out of
all of her friends, I probably have the most love
for you because and some of her friends, especially her
new friends, her new Malibu friends, some of her friends.
You know no issue some of them. You're like people
(46:14):
always think that, like California is such a bubble. It's
like Malibu's is a weird bubble the other direction.
Speaker 2 (46:20):
I don't know that it is, all right, Jocelyn, I
love you.
Speaker 1 (46:24):
I don't love you anymore. Disgusting Casha, Hey, thank you,
doctor Jocelyn. What a delight. And guess what. My wife
(46:46):
is furious that I gave the gift away. Ah, that's
what I wanted. I wanted it to, you know, be funny.
And she was mad. She was like, are you are
you kidding me? Turns out it would have been a
good gift for my wife. Turns turns out she would
have loved it. Guess what, Jocen's not giving it up.
(47:10):
That's what I like. All Right, let's do our segment ready, Buddy,
Hello from Toss Show. That's where we say hello to
one of our subscribers. Now this week we are saying
hi to Lorna in Savannah. Now she's not a subscriber,
but her husband, Carl. He's a big fan Carl. His
name's Carl, but he spells his with a K. You
(47:31):
spell yours with a C. Okay, you don't care anyway,
he's just hoping that this shotout will make his wife
Lorna get on the Tosh train. Well, Laurna, I've never
said that word before. You ever said you know anybody
named Laurna? No, Lorna's I've never met a Lorna. I'm
excited now, Laura. We hope you, We hope you come aboard.
(47:55):
I don't know Lorna. Laurna and Carl, that's that sounds
like a real Georgia couple. We gotta do some plugs.
Tossshowstore dot com. Get some of that sweet Toss Show merch.
There you go, Carl, Welcome back, ADDIE's Tour, Daniel's Tour.
Check out our dates. This week it's free plug. Let's
(48:18):
go hit the free plug music. That's just some vintage
library rock music right there. This week's free plug. Believe
it or not, we're doing bowling again.
Speaker 2 (48:31):
Nice.
Speaker 1 (48:32):
I've never I've never seen a bowling commercial in my
life here on Toss Show. This is the second time
we've plugged bowling. All right. It's in beautiful Pacifica, California
for the dry January Sober social. Oh that just rolls
off the tongue. Too dry. No, alcohol. Nothing better than
bowling and sobriety. It's a substance free gathering. It's designed
(48:57):
for those committed to staying sober throughout the month the month.
I never get why people do things for one month
and then they're back. What a weird increment of time. Anyway,
they are offering a refreshing way to connect with others
who are taking the Dry January pledge? Is that a thing?
People aren't drinking in January? That's the thing? Is that
(49:19):
just like a New Year's thing? And then you realize,
oh well, no, wonder this month is so depressing. We've
been sober the whole time. It join us for dinner
and bowling. Okay, so they're gonna have dinner. Oh man,
what's that meal? What's that meal gonna be? Anyway, it's
a Dry January Sober social bowling plus dinner, January twenty fourth,
from six to nine pm. How many How many frames
(49:42):
can you bowl in a three hour window? Sixty? What?
Speaker 2 (49:49):
Three hours?
Speaker 1 (49:50):
At least? Nine? Wait? Is frames a game? O?
Speaker 2 (49:53):
Wait?
Speaker 1 (49:53):
I'm going to complete games? Nine would be ninety frames? Right? No? Okay?
How many games?
Speaker 2 (49:58):
I would say nine?
Speaker 1 (49:59):
Ye. I've never bowled more than two games in my life.
I can't imagine wanting to go continue to keep bowling.
Speaker 2 (50:05):
Three hours is a lot long.
Speaker 1 (50:07):
Well, I don't even care about the time. I just meant.
I was just referring to nine games, all right, Anyway,
more information, visit Stanford Beers, no Peers that'd be weird
Stanford Peers, or sober underscored Stanford. See you next week.
Host
Daniel Tosh
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