"I'm Tired" Keeps Trending; Why Sleep Must Be Resolution #1

Whatever is on your list of New Year's resolutions, move SLEEP ahead of all of them ... because chances are, you're exhausted! 90% of adults report consistently feeling tired. Amy and T.J. go through the 2025 data compiled by Oura -- which shows just how tired we are and how much sleep we're missing. Plus, some fun stats about which country gets the most sleep, how many Americans take naps, and who gets better sleep: men or women? 

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hey, there, everybody. It is Wednesday, December thirty first, and
so many of us, some of us, I should say,
might be planning our New Year's Eve celebrations, but a
lot of us are planning our New Year's resolutions. What
we're going to do better in twenty twenty six, what
we've gotten wrong in twenty twenty five. And I am
curious just how many of you have sleep on your

(00:24):
list of things to improve on for twenty twenty six. DJ,
I know it's on your list.

Speaker 2 (00:32):
Yeah, it's been there for the past. I don't know,
twenty years of my life crushing it now. No, it's
a struggle for a lot of people. And look, you
make all these resolutions about all the stuff you want
to do. In fact is you can't do any of
it until you get better sleep. You really cannot be
good and efficient. You can maintain, you can get back.
I who knows what I could have been if I
had proper sleep and I had a successful career. Who

(00:55):
knows I could have been president if I just had
enough sleep.

Speaker 1 (01:00):
It is true if you think about it. It's something
we talk a lot about, but in actuality, we deprioritize
it every single day and It affects your mood, It
affects your health, It affects how you treat yourself, how
you treat others, how productive you are. It actually is
probably one of the most important things we do other
than eat right in terms of surviving.

Speaker 2 (01:23):
We consider that a necessity, but we don't consider sleeping necessity.
So with that in mind, yes, the idea all these resolutions.
I bet most people who are listening and have a
resolution to have a list, sleep is probably not on it,
but it needs to be number one. Now look at
your list and say, hm, can I do that without
being rested? Can I do that? Probably not? Yep.

Speaker 1 (01:42):
It affects everything, So this is interesting. Do you know
the phrase I'm tired reached its highest point ever on
Google trends. That happened two years ago and I just checked.
It's unbelievable how high people just put in Google I'm
tired because they want to find out why, what they
can do about it, how they can figure out how

(02:04):
to survive throughout the day while being tired. But that
just tells you where we are. Ninety one percent of
adults consistently report not feeling well rested. How often would
you say on a daily basis, you feel not well rested.

Speaker 2 (02:20):
Oh, this is a this is an everyday thing. I
never feel well rested ever. Ever, there usually comes a
day when I have actually had to be up twenty
four hours or more. You know me, I have these
moments I push myself because something's got to get done,
and then the next day I have no choice and
I will pass out anywhere in the house. And that's
the only time I get decent sleep is I have

(02:43):
to kill myself the day before it gets so exhausted
to get sleep. And those are the only times. And
you see how often that happens. And not even once
a month do I get good sleep.

Speaker 1 (02:52):
I always every day I'm hopeful, like, how'd you sleep?
And you're like, same, I've been up for hours. I
wake up at four and you have been up for hours.
That is what it is almost every day. And you're
not alone. And here's the thing you haven't tried. Three
and four people who were a part of what's called

(03:14):
the Snooze Report. It's calm dot COM's sleep study. They
did a big one and here are the results from it.
Three and four say they don't want to be dependent
on sleep aids and yet forty two percent say they
cannot sleep without them.

Speaker 2 (03:28):
What are sleeping?

Speaker 1 (03:29):
You can have anything from melatonin to trasidone to and pilm. Okay, yes,
so it runs the gammut.

Speaker 2 (03:36):
It's kind of just putting on a mask.

Speaker 1 (03:37):
Correct. No, No, we're talking about actually taking a pill.
So forty two percent can't sleep without them. Fifty five
percent of people do turn to medication, marijuana, or alcohol
to try and help them sleep, and ninety one percent yes,
don't feel rested, But seventy three percent say they're open
to trying new things to improve their sleep. Are you

(03:59):
open to try new things?

Speaker 2 (04:00):
Try anything? I'll try anything. It doesn't get in a
way my work schedule.

Speaker 1 (04:06):
There you go, right. And fifty two percent of adults
take naps at least once a week, but fifteen percent
of adults nap every single day. You nap when you're desperate,
when you don't intend to. That's when you fall asleep
on the couch.

Speaker 2 (04:18):
The thing my nap is usually something that registers are
my or ring that happens between eight and nine thirty
because I passed out early and then I get up
and go get in the bed. But I think the
naps you're talking about of people like in the middle.

Speaker 1 (04:32):
Of the day they choose to take a nap. You
just actually fall asleep without realizing. That's that's called like desperation.
How many hours of sleep do you believe you get
each night?

Speaker 2 (04:43):
Like on average three to five? I average place four four.

Speaker 1 (04:47):
That is abysmal. Obviously, the recommendation is between seven and eight.
Only thirty one percent of adults get seven hours of
sleep or more.

Speaker 2 (04:54):
You don't have to be rude about it.

Speaker 1 (04:55):
Indeed, all right, so you know what the holy grail
of sleep is?

Speaker 2 (05:00):
Correct?

Speaker 1 (05:01):
What all the experts say you need to do to
get a good night's rest? Can you name them?

Speaker 2 (05:05):
What do you mean?

Speaker 1 (05:06):
Yeah? What the experts say you should do before and
as you prepare to sleep? Are there? Do you have
like a checklist? You know what that is? With you?

Speaker 2 (05:14):
I have one.

Speaker 1 (05:15):
Yeah, you've heard it over the years.

Speaker 2 (05:16):
I imagine telling you the same thing. That room needs
to be dark, it needs to be a certain temperature,
it needs you need to make sure you don't look
at any screens ahead of time. I had somebody say
the bed should only be for sleep and sex. You
should not be watching TV or on your computer or
doing anything else. So I think we've all heard those
our whole life. Yeah, what you're supposed to be doing.

(05:39):
I think that's more specific stuff about when to eat
and no alcohol as well.

Speaker 1 (05:45):
Yeah, you just named you just named everything. A cool, dark,
quiet room, sixty to sixty seven degrees. I will say, Babe,
you like your rooms warm, bright and loud. Yeah, so
that's I've had to adjust. Well, it's certainly not quiet.
You like the TV on, you like it warm, and

(06:05):
with the TV on there are bright lights.

Speaker 2 (06:08):
Can't do coal. I do dim the TV for you.

Speaker 1 (06:10):
You do, and I end up, Actually, I don't know
if you realize I do this, but I actually create
another pillow to block out the TV lights so I
don't see it when I'm.

Speaker 2 (06:17):
Sleeping that for a while. So when I start dimming,
I take it down to zero on the brightness.

Speaker 1 (06:23):
Yes, and then you know, sometimes if I get really hot,
I'll sneak and turn the temperature down a little bit. Trust,
So we deal with that. Yes, not drinking alcohol or
caffeine in the several hours before bed, and then another
big thing is having that regular bedtime and wake up time.
So you did everything that the experts say, but there's
a trend on TikTok and it boomed this year. It's
called sleep maxing, So TikTok users, these are non scientific,

(06:47):
non expert based tips basically on how to improve your sleep.
Curious if you've heard of any of these, and these
have a massed hundreds of thousands of us. The hashtag
sleepmaxing is everye on TikTok. Nostril expanders.

Speaker 2 (07:02):
You said sleep maxing, So.

Speaker 1 (07:04):
Yeah, to maximize your sleep. It's the cool phrase sleep maxing.
So nostril expanders. Have you heard of that?

Speaker 2 (07:11):
How do you expand one's nostrils?

Speaker 1 (07:13):
There's something you put in your nose to help your breathing.
It like it's like it's a tape or something like.
It expands anyway, if you go online, you can buy
nostril expanders. People tape their mouths so that they don't
snore it they think that that helps you. Yes, they've
said don't do this, but they're all showing how you
Actually you can buy mouth tape so that you don't snore.

(07:36):
You it's supposed to help sleep apnea, maybe help your
partners sleep better because you're not making noises. It prevents
dry mouth all of those.

Speaker 2 (07:44):
Things possibly causes death. What are you doing?

Speaker 1 (07:46):
Yes, it's dangerous, but that's a part of this trend.
Weighted blankets. We've heard a lot about that. Some people
believe in red light therapy before they go to bed,
those led lights that are like everything now, apparently they
cure everything from acney to wrinkles to sleeping.

Speaker 2 (08:00):
We're just talking.

Speaker 1 (08:04):
And then people take supplements like magnesium and melatonin. But
when people do this on their own and self prescribed,
they don't know how much they're taking and they aren't sure,
so doctors don't recommend that either without speaking to a physician.
And then here's another one, eating kiwi before bed. Apparently
it has sera tonin boosting properties and antioxidants that help
induce sleep. So I guess that couldn't harm anyone. If

(08:25):
you want to eat some kiwi before bed.

Speaker 2 (08:28):
Might be up in the middle of the night as.

Speaker 1 (08:33):
Okay, that's fine, I'm thought about that. But the other
thing that is a part of this trend, this sleep baccine,
is wearing some device like an or ring, which we
started this year. This was the first year we wore
our or rings fairly regularly, not every single night, But
here's the warning that comes with the or ring. Be
careful not to get obsessed and constantly check the app

(08:57):
and letting its feedback negatively influence your perspective on your
day or your upcoming sleep.

Speaker 2 (09:03):
You know what your mom warned about that and why
she didn't like the or ring, and it made sense.
We are addicted to it and we look can we
use it for information? Usually we've gotten to a point now,
don't you feel that when you get up in the
morning and how you feel, you can guess your score?

Speaker 1 (09:16):
Yes, one hundred percent. And it has been to me,
it's it's been accurate.

Speaker 2 (09:21):
It's been consistent. They've been great. But to their point
and to your mom's point, if you look at it
and you immediately say, wow, I didn't get a good
night's sleep, you might get into the mindset of, oh,
it's gonna be a terrible day, Oh my god, I
feel bad, and now every little thing that happens you.

Speaker 1 (09:37):
Just blame it on your sleep score. And so yes,
I agree, and that is the danger of these rings.
But when we come back, this is really interesting. Aura
ring has now given not just a personal so if
you have one, it gives you your personal sleep data
for the year. But they also gave some really interesting
sleep data. And think about it, they are tracking people

(09:57):
around the world which countries get the best sleep men
versus women. There's some really interesting trends in twenty twenty
five that Ara Ring was able to put together and
give to you about how we are sleeping. Welcome back

(10:20):
everyone to this New Year's Eve edition of Amy and TJ.
And we are talking about something that probably should be
on all of our New Year's resolution lists, sleep better,
sleep more, because we're all failing at it, it seems
collectively as a human population these days. And I don't
think we acknowledge how much. When we think about it,

(10:42):
it's obvious how much sleep or lack thereof affects our
lives and how we treat each other and how we
treat ourselves.

Speaker 2 (10:50):
I don't know if we do pay enough attention to that,
right we think it's our problem if we're not getting
enough sleep and how we feel, but it has everything
to do with everybody around you having to deal with
your ass I mean included I come. Oh my goodness,
the number of times I come to you and apologize
and say, hey, I'm not feeling I can't. I'm struggling
with it. I can tell. I guess that's just experience

(11:12):
and maybe maturity and being willing and to say, hey,
I know I'm not okay and I know why, and
I'll apolog up say I am so sorry. I have
now sleep is now something that I owe you.

Speaker 1 (11:25):
You have said that exact same thing to me, and
I appreciate it because it does. It does put things
into perspective and it makes a lot of sense. Think
about it a baby, little kids when they need a
n app that's exactly what we are just we're just
grown adults, but we're still acting the same when we
don't get enough sleep like babies.

Speaker 2 (11:42):
That's true.

Speaker 1 (11:43):
That is true, all right. So when it comes to
rest or a ring put together after they have been
monitoring folks whom around the world with their sleep scores,
can you guess which countries and they're right next to
each other recorded the highest average sleep scores in the world,
New Zealand and Australia. Is that interesting? Eighty for New Zealand,

(12:04):
seventy nine point four for Australia. That was their average
sleep score. And we know what our sleep scores have
been over the year. That has. That's pretty impressive to
have an average sleep score of eighty for a country,
for a nation, which one was that New Zealand highest,
the sleeping a lot and sleeping well, maybe because they're
separated geographically from a lot of the world. They just

(12:26):
feel like they're in their own little bubble and it's blissful.

Speaker 2 (12:29):
Well, it has something to do with climate or limited technology.
Is something about New Zealand because I know how hard
it is to get an eighty four sleep score.

Speaker 1 (12:38):
Do you know what New Zealand? New Zealand has incredible
And I've never been and I've always wanted to go hiking,
outdoor activities. People are outside and maybe by being active
and physically active you sleep better on that does make
a lot of sense. And the fact that Australia is
right behind them at seventy nine point four that's interesting. Also,
there is a they say, a very interesting gender divis internationally,

(13:01):
women versus men. Who do you think sleep's better women
or men?

Speaker 2 (13:06):
Men?

Speaker 1 (13:07):
So women have higher they get significantly more sleep, is
what aurr Ring described it as. So women on average
get seven and a quarter hours of sleep each night.
That's impressive. Men, on the other hand, get six point
eight hours of sleep a night. That is an average.
Does that surprise you at all?

Speaker 2 (13:28):
No, I have no idea how people sleep. I have
no idea what sleep is, what it's about. I have
no idea.

Speaker 1 (13:32):
No. And so women are getting more sleep. However, women
showed more higher stress responses. Something that the or ring
also monitors is your state of relaxation versus your state
of anxiety. Women had one hundred and twenty nine minutes
a day of physiological stress, so it's reading on your
body metrics that the or ring is able to measure.

(13:55):
Women have over two hours of physiological stress each day,
men ninety seven minutes. That's a pretty big difference. That's
another half hour plus of stress that women have for
whatever reason that we take on in our bodies that
is readable by the Aura ring.

Speaker 2 (14:13):
Maybe getting too much leep.

Speaker 1 (14:17):
All right, So we have our Aura year enders and
this year get I don't know how long they've been
doing this. We've only had the or ring for one year,
but they have a new feature this year for any
of you Aura ring wearers. And I'm sure you've looked already,
because this started popping up last week and we didn't
look at it until today, and hopefully each year they'll
get a little bit more and more. But they start

(14:37):
out with this fun thing. Based on your body metrics
and your sleep scores, they give you a type, either
your earth, water, fire, or air. So Earth types are
defined by resilience and consistency. Water types prioritize restorative sleep
and evening calm. Fire types had the daily movement stars,
they had high activity levels, and air types had a

(15:00):
year noted for restoration and lightness. I guarantee you neither
one of us are water or air or earth.

Speaker 2 (15:08):
So what that leaves what fire?

Speaker 1 (15:10):
So when I opened mind, that's what I got. Fire?
Is that what you got?

Speaker 2 (15:15):
Water?

Speaker 1 (15:15):
What prioritized restorative sleep and evening calm? That's interesting.

Speaker 2 (15:22):
Oh yeah, I'm not mind. Just a proved point. I mean, yes,
that's what it is. I don't know what that means,
but yes, it says I found calumnor sort of flow
in the evenings this year. Nothing refreshes your body like consistent,
high quality rest. So keep riding the gentle wave into
twenty twenty six.

Speaker 1 (15:39):
You know what I will say at night, you do
calm down. You do slow down, maybe because you have to,
because your body's so exhausted.

Speaker 2 (15:47):
Yeah, it's been sixteen straight hours of running. Yes, that's true.

Speaker 1 (15:51):
Rest Okay, So I was fire. That's you burning through
your activity goals. You were a daily movement star. Keep
that momentum going, and remember that recovery time helps to
fuel activity like oxygen to a flame. So let me
know that I'm active, but probably not doing a good
job of being restorative. Anything else that popped up to

(16:13):
you with your we were looking at all the different
only January.

Speaker 2 (16:16):
It is the only other thing that popped up to
me that it actually said that was the month I
had last year of most restorative sleep. Okay, January. And
it was interesting that January is when I do what
I do dry January.

Speaker 1 (16:32):
Oh my goodness, I don't.

Speaker 2 (16:34):
Drink in January. It is I'm about to do that
once again. And it said my best month was January
in terms of the type of sleep I got.

Speaker 1 (16:42):
That is super super interesting. How about I Actually I
was laughing at the naps I took. How many naps
did you take for the year? They actually it says
forty two. It says I took thirty four naps. That's
probably close to being accurate.

Speaker 2 (16:59):
I don't think think we took any naps, going to
sleep at eight o'clock on the couch because you passed out,
waking up at nine point thirty, going and taking off
your makeup and then getting in beds that they at
the registers as a nap, So I don't. You don't go.
Neither one of us goes at Oh it's two O'clock'm
gonna lay down for a minute.

Speaker 1 (17:17):
We don't take naps, neither one of us. I cannot
recall saying, hey babe, I'm gonna go take a nap
right now. We absolutely have not done that.

Speaker 2 (17:25):
I said I wanted to. I said I'm gonna try to.

Speaker 1 (17:29):
That is absolutely true. A cardiovascular age, was it mostly
aligned with your actual age?

Speaker 2 (17:33):
Yes, I think two years younger.

Speaker 1 (17:34):
Mine's six point five years younger. And that reads with
the national trend. They say that women have lower cardiovascular
ages than men typically, or at least that's what they found.
They tell you how many steps you took, but you'd
have to be wearing your ring all day long, which
we absolutely don't. When were you most active did you
get that score?

Speaker 2 (17:51):
I think it was eight am.

Speaker 1 (17:52):
Oh, mine's a nine am. So yes, morning mover. And
that is absolutely true. So look, this is one of
those in interesting things where it just gives you a
little bit of a history of your year and what
you can improve on. My most active month was August
and my most active day is Friday. I think those
things make sense. It's warm, you're moving around a bunch.
That makes sense. What did you get?

Speaker 2 (18:15):
I don't kind of remember a month in my most
active month. But again, we don't wear the rings during
the day. That's a little that's absolutely I certainly don't
wear mine during the day.

Speaker 1 (18:24):
I wear mine more doing the day than you do,
and that's probably why I got a higher activity or
the whole fire thing. But look, anything that can measure
or I think, put sleep goals in front of your
head so that you are actually being intentional about when
you go to sleep, how you prepare for sleep, and
how important it is to you. Wearing these rings, they

(18:44):
can make you a little crazy with trying to not
get hung up on a bad sleep score, but they
do put sleeping in the forefront of your mind, and
I think that's something we forget about all the time,
and so it's something that we are both going to
try and do better about. In twenty twenty. Maybe this
is the year, babe, you're gonna get a sleep score,
or you're gonna start getting five to six hours at night.

(19:05):
That would be wonderful.

Speaker 2 (19:07):
It really is a plan I know I need to
do bestly. I'm getting older and this is damaging my
houme shortening my life by not getting enough sleep.

Speaker 1 (19:13):
I know that, and we would like you around for
as long.

Speaker 2 (19:16):
As possible the week.

Speaker 1 (19:18):
Sabine and me and all the family and friends who
love you so much probably got that too, right and
without everyone, we hope you get some rest, but certainly
have some fun tonight first, and then maybe maybe start
on January one. What we always appreciate you listening to us.
I'm maybe roboch alongside t. J. Holmes. We'll talk to
you soon.