March 21, 2023 • 42 mins
Episode 53 is here and the moms are all jazzed up! Steve talks about one of his recent best nights of standup. Joe explains how he and his mom talked about anything and everything…even boom booms. Then they get on and off topic when Joe’s weird body comes into play.
And the questions, oh the questions. How to get unstuck, where’s the merch and how have the moms inspired each other. And “Ju Jitsu Stone” writes in to humble brag.
And the questions, oh the questions. How to get unstuck, where’s the merch and how have the moms inspired each other. And “Ju Jitsu Stone” writes in to humble brag.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
There was a problem where taking money.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
All right, welcome, Oh we match color scheme wise, Welcome
to two cool moms.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
I am Joe Gatto.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Hi, I'm Steve Burn also known as don't text back
here we are. So four sent messages to you. Over
the course of a couple of days. Zero response is back,
and then I get her response back.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
It's like, hey, how are you?
Speaker 1 (00:33):
While I was sitting next to you. No, but we
talked on the phone. I called you, remember, Yeah, I'll
call you negate that I did.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Take that out of the mixture, right.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
You're right, Hey, they did.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
I'm not. I'm not above admitting I'm wrong. I'm wrong.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
Turn your never.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
That's great.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
I can show you how I.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Went to the Quad Cities and I loved it.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
What is the Quad City QC's I went to. I
bought this.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
I wanted to show Jiggy this. So the Quad Cities,
it changes, well, it depends when you asked. But it's
like Mollin, East Moleen, Davenport and uh Miami.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
I'm not sure.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
But I asked like five different people when I was
going around town, and they were always they always named
a different one. So I couldn't get a straight answer
at anybody. But I think it's it's like a thing there.
But we found it too. I was very upset that
you weren't with us because we found some men's shops
and we did some men's shopping.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
I walked in.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
I thought, you're gonna love. A couple of them were great. Yeah,
I there was little sleeper hits there and just taking
a nap. Ski and Davenport joke out and be like.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
Hey, no, there's no subtle Joe entering a shop. Yeah,
I'm here.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
I like to be I like to let people know
I'm here and ready to go.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
This This is a question I have for you. Sure,
because you like to go out on the road. You
like to drop a dime on some clothing a shop local.
Do you bring a lot back and then check your
bag or you what do you do disposable.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
Last stuff with me and throw it out? You just
chuck it on the floor.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
The on the I've seen you ripped shirts.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
I ripped them off.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
Sometimes they make it a joke if it's this weekend.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
I couldn't button a shirt legit, couldn't even button.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
It when I went to put it on, and I
had to Justin was with us, and I had to
send them back to the hotel room to get me
a different outfit because I didn't. I was in a
rush to get there, so I was like, I'll just
grab this and I went to button it and I.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
Did the oh no, it wasn't even close it really, you.
Speaker 3 (02:27):
Know like sometimes you like, I'll get it.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
It was like nipsymmetrical, yeah, hiroish oh no, And I
was like oh. And I was like, I'll just wear
it open, but I when was the last time you
wear that shirt?
Speaker 3 (02:38):
The late eighteens.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
And I had a stained undershirt because it was an undershirt.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
I was like, oh, it doesn't matter. I couldn't wear
it open because.
Speaker 3 (02:46):
I had a big coffee stain.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Did you so you could wear one of your merch shirt?
Speaker 3 (02:50):
I don't like that. My merch hairt is a big
is my face?
Speaker 1 (02:54):
You don't want to do that?
Speaker 3 (02:54):
Yeah, you're right, Yeah, yes I didn't.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
I wasn't gonna do that.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
I have done that before when I took my shirt
off and threw it into the crowd, because I've seen that,
you know, they they've you know, the people got to
get the people they want.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
And I've thrown on a merch shirt before.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
We always laughed because in the first season of Jokers,
he used to wear, un ironically around town a true
TV shirt of his own thing.
Speaker 3 (03:17):
And we found that weird and we always made fun
of him for it.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
And uh, he got called out by two cops at
the Staaten Island Ferry really like, hey, you have murder
and practicing jokes and goes, yeah, he's wearing the fucking shirt.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
He doesn't mind being recognized, does He's.
Speaker 3 (03:33):
Somebody that's the people's people.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Did you?
Speaker 3 (03:36):
Did you ever?
Speaker 2 (03:37):
What was your biggest merch item that you've that you've done.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
I'm not a big merch guy. I don't like doing it.
I don't like standing there, I don't like like, I
don't like like taking the card and hi. Yeah, I
just I'd rather do anything but that. Really. Yeah, I
love doing the performing. I love dipping. But I used
to have a Sausage Party t shirt, yes, where it
was like a five silhouetted like boy band poses and
(04:01):
it said Sausage Party World Tour and then listed all
the cities I was in that year and I did it,
and yeah, girls bought it, but no dudes ever bought
it because if they wanted a thing with sausage party
A yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Which is kind of funny, let's get into it.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
But I did sausage Party. I did a crowd work
show in Nashville on Monday. And I've done that bit.
I mean twelve fifteen years I've done it. It's a
fun bit. I love doing it because I never know
what's going to happen. The audience leaves there, they're so happy.
But but this I brought this guy up, this black guy,
(04:42):
and he was you know, you always you kind of
have the black guy go last because you're like, all right,
he's probably godn't know what he's doing, right dancer this rhythm.
I've done this bit again twelve to fifteen years. I've
seen many versions of it. This was hands down. I
have video of it. Somebody took video of it. I have,
hands down, this is the best one I've ever seen.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
Wow, there's a bold stay.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
There's a woman named Noreen who became part of the show.
She in her sixties. I was just you know, she
was fun. When I called her up on stage, the
crowd chanted her name. I was like, Wow, this is
gonna be fun. Okay, cool. So she comes up. She's
a great sport. She's smiling, she's excited to be there.
It's like price is right. She gets on stage like yeah,
black guy. She The reason I said it is like
(05:29):
I was like, oh, you get to cross something off
your bucket list. And she goes, oh Steven, I go yes,
and I put the mic down. She goes, I've had
black and I was like, oh my, and the crowd
again she had nor Reen Noreen. It was like, okay,
we're off to the races. So I completely had forgotten
this guy had brought up. I'd't seen him in a while.
He used to be security at the club. A former marine.
(05:53):
Super nice guy, kind of you know under underspoken, doesn't
not outgoing, you know. She's kind of like comes up
up and he just puts his hands up to her.
She puts her hands in his and he literally just
picks her up and just starts drilling her in the
air and she is like bucking on like an and
(06:13):
she is dying laughing. Her head is snapping back, she's laughing.
She go who and he's like hitting her, but then
he does the old rapid punch. He's like, she's just
like this. It was like a.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Magic mic moment.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
I fell to the ground. I was crying. I was
laughing so hard. And then we had another four minutes
after that bit. But I have the video. I'll send
it a well institute in this or whatever. But could
have been my favorite one I've ever seen, standing ovation
after Sawtage Party, which I've seen a handful of times,
but this one was like everybody wrapped hers up top.
It was sold out, everybody stood up and it was
(06:51):
one of those great moments.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Do you think that Noreens Night started with sure, I
go catch a comedy show.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Next thing she knows, she's.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Being levitated by a reg Democrat two hundred and fifty
strangers her name yelling Norrin.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
She's like, this is my life.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
I hope she went out till I got hit by
a truck and died, because.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
That's a great Now again better yeah, it'll never get better. Yeah.
She was in her sixties, and I really thought before
she did it, I was teasing her. I was like,
don't die, yeah, you know, as like a line. But
when she was getting bucked, I was like, oh, seriously,
don't die. I mean, I'm really she was getting chucked,
and then.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
That's so fun.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
For no walk it off, Nourene walk it off, because
the danger with that bit is sometimes you get Here's
what I've learned the last few years is when I
first did it, I was a guy my twenty or
you know, early thirties. When I started doing, I think,
and you could pick out girls kind of like your
own age. It was fun. Something happened in the last
four or five years were young girls with all the
(07:56):
me too stuff and everything, they don't want any part
of it. I've had a handful of girls just like No,
I didn't I didn't ask for this. I've had a
few get up and walk out. And then what I've
had is I've brought up like a woman in her
forties and fifties or like a sixties and they go bananas.
Well they're they're in a different mindset too, right, Oh yeah,
(08:16):
they don't give a shit. They're grabbing ass, they're feeling
the guys they're getting like really hands I.
Speaker 2 (08:20):
Had a that reminds me of a I had a
very handsy coworker when I was in my late twenties
named Ricky Party City nice fella. I worked with this
older woman I think her name was Alison, not Hundreercent.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
She always either Alice or Allison. But she was super.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
She was like in her late fifties maybe sixties, working
to register at Party City, and she would always like
corner me in the stock room be like help me
with this box.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
Like it was really weird.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
And I was like, it's so funny to think, like
she was like she couldn't wait to go to work.
Speaker 3 (08:53):
She was like, I'm gonna get stock.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
But it's so funny to see, like when you get
hit on by older women when you're older, or even
when you're younger, I guess, but like when you're when
you're when you're younger, it's just like super weird because
like it's like sometimes like you're attracted back, and do
you remember like a couple of cougar moments you had
where you're like, oh, I'm talking about when you were younger.
It was like oh yeah, yeah, yeah, she still got it.
Speaker 1 (09:17):
Oh yeah, sure, yeah. I love that they did that.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
That was my favorite thing about Golden Girls, that they
made Blanche, the way they made her. Oh that was
so phenomenal, Like even before like think about when they
made that TV show, right sure, Like that was such
a smart, fun move to make her just like own her.
Speaker 1 (09:32):
A sexuality old on Sullivan and Sudden, we did that
with Christine. She was very promiscuous. But the thing we
did on our show, which had never been seen in television,
which we always loved, is that Christine and Owen Benjamin
her Son, it was always like are they having sex?
(09:54):
Like they were? They were always so comfortable with each
other sexually, and they would be each other's wingman or
wing person. But they would also say things where just
like they'd leave, We're like, are they banging? Like should
we call the cops? Like this is weird? There was
an episode where oh, we did a karaoke episode and
they were singing like yes, I remember, like they were
(10:16):
like banging each other. We're like, what is going on?
It was That was the dynamic I really really liked
on our show. Oh my God, and she's she's just fantastic.
But anytime the old trope of the older sexualized woman
was always fun.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
My mom's relationship was very much like Owen Benjamin and
Christine's with me and my mom.
Speaker 3 (10:36):
As she got older.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
Really, my mom was active, okay, and that's a polite
way of yeah, because she came up anyway, became Yeah,
she became a widow at fifty two. No, if she
was even that old, I don't even know she was
fifty two. Yeah, I think she was fifty two. Right,
So she was young and vibrant her whole life, right,
And she was a good looking lady. Mom Duke's uh
silver fox, you know, turned some heads.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
And when you have a great personality as well, or
it's tough not to.
Speaker 3 (11:03):
Say she was ugly about her personality was no, no, no.
Speaker 1 (11:05):
No, you're saying she's good looking. But when you have
that together, you know what I mean, when when you're
a little older, personality goes so fucking you're killing it.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
Yeah, look at me, Look at me crushing it. Crushing it.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
Stand back form the line to the left, silver funks.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
So my mother and not very much like she would
talk about very openly about her dating life and then
like her first quarter, like the first church, Like if
I came off from day whatever, I think, so she'd be.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Like sitping a cofee and home moo. She'd be like,
so did you bang?
Speaker 2 (11:41):
Sal is always super like uncomfortable around me, and my
mother too, because I've always just talk about anything with
my mom and and I'd be like my mom, like
I go what. I would go out with Sal and Sala.
Sometimes we'll come back to my house and crash. We
would just hanging out whatever. And we wake up and
behind breakfast with my mom. She's like, so, boys, I
was at night last Like, like, Mom, you should have
seen the ass on this one.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
She's like, tell me, you.
Speaker 3 (12:02):
Know, like that.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
But we had that like kind of open relationship too.
I hope that my kids are comfortable like that because my.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
Niece and they're going to be they have no true
my niece.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
And nephew just started being uh, they went to college
right now, so they're eighteen. They're eighteen years old, freshman's
in college, and they have My sister has a very.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
Good rapport with them as well. Sure they're very open
about talking.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
About but your sisters, like you, they're very outgoing. Yeah,
I would be hard pressed to think that they'd be
recluse to around the kids or whatever.
Speaker 2 (12:31):
I think outgoing parents though, because it's a different dynamic
with your kids and you have with you know, being
outgoing with your kids doesn't Outgoing isn't really a word
you use for your parents, right, because your parents are
the outgoing is like for strangers. So, but if your
parents are approachable or sure outspoken, maybe.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
Right, right, there's a big difference between approachable and outspoke
one hundred percent. I would I would assume that your
mother is probably was probably outspoken, very vibrant. Yes, what
I guess, sure, yeah, sure you never met her never? No, No,
she goes by the grave.
Speaker 3 (13:06):
We go by the grave.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
You bring it up all the time. So, yeah, my folk,
my father is always approachable. My father, dad is he's like,
he's just a he's a great dude.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
So he's one of those guys that he always feels
like your uncle, you know, he's got that vibe about it.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
Yeah, he's you're instantly part of his family.
Speaker 1 (13:23):
Yeah, all the kids always like my dad. My dad
would always come to the comedy sets, the comics love
my father. He's just a great dude, very outgoing, but
but still like a father. You know. He's not my buddy,
he's not my friend. He's like he's my dad. And
my mom is just just the sweetest little lady that
can barely She gets so insecure about her English that
(13:46):
she gets really inhibited, should get quiet and but She's
the most brutally honest woman I've ever met in my life.
She remember my wife, Jessica, her younger sister Amanda, uh,
look very similar, and then Lindsay doesn't really look like them,
but you know, you could tell their sisters, but jess
(14:07):
and Amanda look alike. And then Lindsay, you know, anyways,
could be like a cousin. But they're all sisters, right,
And so my mom knows Jessica knows Amanda, and meeting
Lindsay for the first time, to this day, I can't
believe she said this. She goes, she goes, oh, hi,
She's like, yeah, I'm a Lindsay, I'm Jessica's sister. She goes, oh, sister,
(14:27):
you look weird. I was like, oh no, oh no,
you just feel yourself leaving your body and you're instantly like,
grab the tools. I gotta do patchwork. I gotta fucking
fix this.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
And she's like, oh, I mean it's just your eyes
they're too far apart.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
But unusual to the other two. My mom doesn't have
the dense vocabulary, so that's what she said. And I'm
just like, oh, for fox sake, so that's great. I
don't get stuck like it did. Apologize the next like
twenty times a solid. By the way, my mom, you
know she wasn't. Fuck. You look weird?
Speaker 3 (15:05):
Weird?
Speaker 1 (15:06):
Who wants to hear that?
Speaker 3 (15:07):
I get that all the time.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
You look weird?
Speaker 3 (15:09):
Yeah, no, yeah, I get that.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
Why why would you look weird?
Speaker 3 (15:15):
I mean, look at me, I'm a weird looking fella.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
I don't think so.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
I mean my body type is very weird. Well, like
all all my fats in my stomach right pretty much.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
I look at my arms.
Speaker 3 (15:27):
Look, I look kind of jacked.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
You look like if you were in the ocean from
here up. He's kind of like a good looking Yeah.
And then and then you get out and it's like
getting fish start flowing to the top, just dead fish.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
Oh it's low tide.
Speaker 1 (15:47):
Kids are screaming, hell's weird, like on the whistle, helicopter's
coming in. Weird weird. But you you admit you don't
do anything. No, I say, do you want to take
a walk. I don't take a walk for what? Yeah,
(16:09):
you don't. You don't three blocks? You don't exercise at all. No.
Speaker 2 (16:12):
I used to work on my feet a lot, and
I don't any excuse me. I used to work on
my feet a lot.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
So you considered working on your feet that was exercise
for sure.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
I mean, if you don't sit down for all day,
you know, there's the difference. Now I sit down at
your computer, I'm right, and I'm doing whatever. You know,
But like it's I was used to be not sit for.
Speaker 3 (16:26):
You know, twelve to fourteen hours a day.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Sure, it's crazy you're up and around you when you're
getting your steps in. Do you not get steps in
at all?
Speaker 3 (16:32):
Like it is something?
Speaker 1 (16:33):
Do you when's the last time you had the gumption
to be like, I should get off the couch and
do something. I should do something like for my health.
I'm pretty sure it was two thousand and four, Joseph,
jose you know that's not good to not be somewhat active. No,
I'm yeah, because when we're on the road, I've mentioned
(16:54):
it to you, but like, hey, we should take it,
you know whatever. But you you walk through shops and stuff.
So I walk about town, you walk about town. Maybe
that's considered.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
I guess you're gonna get step I'm not just like,
oh we're going lethargic, big fatty.
Speaker 3 (17:09):
I don't mind it.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
Yeah, I probably should. You could do more?
Speaker 3 (17:14):
Well, we all could.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
Of course I should, I absolutely could. But but you,
I think you.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
Was That's something people say, what because like I should
do more? And I'm owning that I should definitely do more.
And I answered, we all could do more. I'll throw
it in a royal way like no, it's like I
get it.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
I get it. But Joe, we're talking about you.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
Yeah, yeah, I'll do more.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
You know what?
Speaker 3 (17:41):
How was that? I'm not sitting around all day now.
This is my job now is sit.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Around and walk to you and she do the hokey pokey.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Turn myself around and then you're done. That's what it's
all about. All right here, we want to help some Americans.
Speaker 1 (17:53):
Here we go. We're here for you. We have all
the answers. Thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Never ends at two Cool Moms pod on the instagrams,
follow us, subscribe, subscribe, but I don't you know what,
I don't care you guys don't want to follow us,
don't do it. I'm not gonna force you. It's fine,
that's fine. We're here doing it anyway. To the seven people,
you seven of you is listening.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
Coming to us from Natalie. Hi, Mommy's how do you
deal with feeling? How do you deal with feelings? Stuck
in life? I get up and take a walk. When's
the last time you were in a rut? I mean,
I'm still in one. Do you consider yourself still in
a rut?
Speaker 3 (18:34):
I would say I'm at the precipice of the rut.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
I'm stay active with work. I say, act you're always working?
Speaker 3 (18:40):
Well, no, I say acting with work? I say acted
with I would you know?
Speaker 2 (18:44):
I'm invested heavily in the in the in the children's
which is good. I wouldn't consider myself I was in
a Yeah, I'm out of a rut. I wouldn't say
I'm in a rut anymore. Yeah it's nothing. I mean,
come on, it's been you know, over a year. You
gotta you gotta, you gotta get it on to move
with yourself.
Speaker 1 (18:56):
Yeah, yeah, you gotta do something. What are you gonna
sit there and poor er?
Speaker 3 (19:01):
I did that for too long.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
I eat nice cream and just sitting on the couch
watching you know, Oprah reruns on Peacock.
Speaker 3 (19:10):
Like what am I doing?
Speaker 2 (19:11):
So I would say I was in a rut for
a minute, but I think I'm out of the rod. Yeah, yeah,
I might be driving with despare though you know what
I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Really you think that, yeah, I would say that. I
would say I'm driving with the spare when you know
what I think, and feel free to edit this out.
Feel free to edit this out because because sometimes.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
You don't want to get too personal, right, I wouldn't
say I'm in a run anymore.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
I would say I'm almost out of the rut, almost reutless.
That's your edited points. That's why you did it, That's
why we got You're right.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
We did edit all that out.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
Yeah, okay, Well, I'm glad to hear you're not in
a rut, and you never seem like you were in one.
By the way, you you do a great job at
compartmentalizing for sure.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
Everything you have to keep the train moving, right, that's it.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
Yeah, Well she's stuck.
Speaker 3 (20:01):
So what she said? What do you do when you
feel stuck?
Speaker 2 (20:04):
The first thing I would say is probably try to
identify what caused you to get stuck, right, You have
to work through that first.
Speaker 3 (20:11):
It could be anything, It could be something. You know.
This happens with a lot of people, too, is what.
Speaker 2 (20:14):
I have a lot of friends that this has happened
to something that seems minor completely derails you and you
don't realize it until you're derailed, you.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
Know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
Yeah, like if a relationship falls apart, or a you know,
or you lose a job or some of those are
big things and you're like, oh, that's why I'm stuck.
But some people are just like wanted something that happened
didn't happen, had a you know, a bad night out
with a friend and it didn't like go out the
way they wanted to where they gotten a little bit
of a tiff and it was like, oh, that's nothing,
and it realizes it becomes something.
Speaker 3 (20:44):
So I think the first part is.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
To identify while you're stuck and see if it's a
big reason. Well you have to work on that anyway, right,
you have to get a new job, sure, get back
on their different relationships.
Speaker 3 (20:55):
Figure that part out. But it's a little thing.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
I think that's where more of the work is needed,
because you have to really dig down and take.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
A real look and to see like, oh, this is
what it is. Smart to take stock of how big
of an issue it ultimately is. You know.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
Yeah, I mean do you feel I feel like you
get you feel like you're stuck a lot me personally,
but you work through it every time.
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Oh yeah, yeah, I mean the worst thing to do
is just sit there and oh the world, you know,
the just feeling sorry for yourself. It's like, you know,
I think when I get in those situations, it's like
it takes a day or two and I just and
then just something comes over me like fuck it, you're
gonna bitch about this all day and are you gonna
do something about it? So what are we gonna do?
This is the situation you want to It's like complaining
(21:39):
about the weather. It's out of your control. Just shut
the fuck up and get to work.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
That's a great analogy. It's like complaining about the weather
because that.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
Really is Yeah, you can't do anything about it.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
Like I will say that too about the other thing, too,
is like I've learned this, you know, kind of the
hard way too, is like nobody helps you, but you nobody,
Like you can have friends who are there for you
and help you through, but the end of the day,
it's one on you.
Speaker 1 (22:01):
Oh, you're going to be stuck until you start moving.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
Even if if somebody's trying to push the car out
of the mud, you guys still step on the gas,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (22:08):
It's like you're in charge of it.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
Did you make that up?
Speaker 3 (22:10):
I did? That's pretty good.
Speaker 1 (22:11):
That was a pretty good one. All right. That's something
you'd expect to hear from like a priest or like
Tyler Perry or Yeah, I present the blessing Father Father,
Tyler Perry. There we go. That's a great a little
you just made that up?
Speaker 3 (22:25):
I did. Yeah, So you've inspired me to motivate.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
Where you got to come up with a calendar?
Speaker 3 (22:30):
I have a bunch of motivational little sayings.
Speaker 2 (22:32):
Actually, yeah, give me one more. Life sucks sometimes, you all,
you gotta do a suck harder.
Speaker 1 (22:38):
My next question, here's a question coming us from Hannah.
Where's the merch? Oh? You know what?
Speaker 2 (22:47):
The demand the demands are coming in, so we're going
to have to start doing it. This is like the
third or fourth time I've heard it. We have to answer,
we have to answer with it. And I guess you
know what link is going to be in the bio
to uh get a two cool moms?
Speaker 3 (23:00):
What are we gonna do? A shirt?
Speaker 1 (23:00):
What do you wanna do a shirt? Or saying you
know what I like?
Speaker 3 (23:05):
I like Bazancres.
Speaker 2 (23:07):
I'd love that saying that's my favorite thing we've said
over the fifteen plus episodes.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
You said it, well, you jumped on it. I jumped
on on that episode and I love it.
Speaker 3 (23:15):
Do you not want it to be what I've said?
You want to be what you've said?
Speaker 1 (23:17):
I wanted to be Bizoncres. No. Well you're you're gonna
say something, go ahead, No, No, I think Bezocres is good.
Two cool moms yes and end quotes yan Yang Parmesan.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
Yang Parmisan. Yeah, Yingang Parmesan's great. Yeah, we should put
a pizza pie. That's the ying Yang on it.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
I mean, the simple one is just to have the
two cool.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
Moms, like the logo on a on then our nuggets,
you know what faces this is.
Speaker 1 (23:44):
But you know what we should sell more than I
think we should.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
I think we should sell a coffee munk ah. That's
smart as mom is having their coffees, that's right, and
then listening, you know, yep, let's do it all.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
Right, let's get on it. All right, we'll talk to
our merch department.
Speaker 2 (23:59):
J all right, honorary honorary mom, mommy.
Speaker 3 (24:06):
That's great, that's pretty cool. That's pretty cool. An honorary mommy.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
I mean, we just gave it to you.
Speaker 2 (24:14):
You know what, maybe we should another one we can
put it is get talking to a fucking microphone, you idiot,
because he's here, he is again, without a micro we
can't hear him. We can hear him in the room,
and he's now everybody now we gotta do subtitles.
Speaker 1 (24:28):
Yep. Well there's no WI in it. You you doing
total Why don't you have a microphone?
Speaker 3 (24:37):
It's facing nothing. The microphone right now is just facing nothing.
It's straight up in the air.
Speaker 1 (24:46):
This is coming to us, I think I think we
answered something similar to this. This is coming us from Marissa. Okay,
how did you two meet? What is something you've learned
about yourself or became in through your friendship with one another?
So that's the part that's different. That's why I picked it.
Speaker 3 (25:04):
Oh that's nice.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
That's been inspiring through Well, we met. We discussed this
before we met. When when your show is premiering? My
show was premiering my last three seasons and whatever. You
have like three homes. So I think the thing that
I find most inspiring about you is is there is
a relentless positivity that you don't just exude, but I
(25:28):
really feel is a part of your person, like a
part of you. You just are a very upbeat, positive person.
I think that's part of the reason why your show
is so successful, because it's not only what you see
on screen, but it permeates to the set. I think
that's why you've had the same people working there for
(25:50):
so many years. But everywhere we go, everywhere we go,
you treat everybody the same. You treat the security guard,
you treat the house manager, you treat the clerk at
whatever boutique shop you walk into, or the coffee shop.
Everybody's a friend, and you do live by that mantra
of be kind. I really think you do do that,
(26:11):
Unlike like Ellen, who was preaching it but you know
you heard horror stories about but like you genuinely are
that individual. And I know that even on days where
you've received, you know, less than promising news, it takes
a minute to get that out of you because you
can see it because you're just kind of like moving
(26:33):
on and everything, but you just you don't dwell on things.
You just drive forward with relentless positivity. And that's something
I find very inspiring. Thank you, you're a friendship.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
Yet Mommy, I appreciate that you.
Speaker 2 (26:46):
Are a here we go, you know where to get
a good slice of pizza, and that is really very
I will say this about you.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
This is what I will say about you too.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
I will say that you make you have what I
call the Jeter effect, and it was something I saw
in real life that I couldn't believe. It's like when
you talk, when you're talking to someone, you make them
feel like they're the most special and only person in
the room.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Right.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
Think you have a great you have a superpower that
way where you make people feel and you see that
when you especially that's just why you're such a successful
when it comes to crowd work and whatnot and you
and just even speaking within two people like you make
them feel like you care about what they're saying and
like sure you want to get to know them, and
even if it is an act, which it's not.
Speaker 3 (27:29):
You do it better than anybody ever has. Like I
feel like, thank you.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
I think you're just really like to get to know Pia,
and you really do take the time to like you're thoughtful.
I would say that's probably the best word ever like
you buy your gifts for no reason, like you do
things like that, Like you're.
Speaker 3 (27:41):
A thoughtful person. I think that's why I thank you.
Speaker 2 (27:43):
But that's what's most inspiring about you is I've had
I've tried to think about that as well, and taking
the time and putting stock in friendships the way that
I feel like you do, because you know a lot
of people too, but you don't consider a lot of
people friends true, you know, like you've been around a minute,
Like I would go to around town with you, like
down to the cellar and not here in New York
and just seeing like when you walk in the room,
(28:04):
everyone knows you and you know everybody, but you could
tell like there is people that you want to spend
time with and talk to.
Speaker 1 (28:10):
Sure. Yeah, So I think that's a great thing about
the comic clubs too, is that you're waiting to go
up right, so you're kind of forced to talk to
with everybody. But I mean it's just like I don't know,
there is a nice fraternal bond that you develop after
like so many years of just doing this and running
and everybody. It's I don't know, even going out last night,
I like I enjoy catching up with, you know, and
(28:33):
then there's all these new comics I haven't met or whatever.
But but you know what's funny is being friends with
Vince Vaughan for years. I'm always the other guy, right
when you're with Vince. When I'm by myself, I'm a comic, right.
But when you're with Vince, you're the other guy, and
you're constantly being, oh, can you take this for me,
can you take this picture for me? Whatever? And so
every time I'm somewhere and I'm talking to somebody, I
(28:56):
see the other guy, and so I try to give
credence to the other guys well or like I remember
one time we were hanging out with Jason Sideikis and
his friend and I and I was with Vince, and
I was like, Oh, he's Jason's other guy. So we
were just bullshitting about that. But I just being that
other person. Like That's why that picture Justin always makes
(29:18):
me have he's your other guy, you know. And there
was a girl that literally climbed over Justin at dinner
to take a picture. I think it's bananas, but I
always have a lot of empathy for the other guy
or the other girl too. Yeah, the other person the
other person. Yeah. And one of my favorite things to
do this This is something I used to do when
(29:38):
I was when i'd go out all the time, is
I would go out and there's always like after a show,
you'd go to the bar or the club whatever, and
there was always and my friends were like, why the
fuck are you doing this? And there was like the
table of girls, every guy's going to buy a drink for,
right And what I said is, look, we're just getting
our night started, so let's have a little fucking fun.
(29:59):
So I go over to the table of girls that
nobody's buying a drink for. I bet, girls, I'm buying
you fucking drink. Let's go. We're going to the bar
right now. We're all doing a shot together. And every
time I did it, I was never let down because
the intention wasn't hook up obviously with any of them,
but it was we're going to have an absolute blast night.
I was always like, trust me, that's the most fun
(30:19):
table in this room, the table of fun, right, the
table of fun, and that's where you start your night
off and have fun and then you you know, I
don't know. For me, it was always like, that's that's
where I go. It's the way to go. Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 3 (30:30):
I like that.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Okay, here we go, this is coming us from Stone.
Speaker 3 (30:33):
You got some work here, great name.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
Okay, ooopsies, okay, this going us from Stone. Hytoogle moms,
my name is Stone. You might not remember, but I
told you I was going to a jiu jitsu tournament
and I want to let you know I won first
when six and oh your advice really helped my nerves.
Just want to say, thanks, We're champions. We are champions. Oh,
(31:00):
you have to do it.
Speaker 3 (31:01):
I can't.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
You worry about my edded points? Oh my god, isn't
that a musical? Well, in this day and age, it
could be considered eracis the best joke.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
In your special, the best joke in your special. And
if you haven't seen it, make sure you will, make
sure you check it out. So the last late night
Steve Burns on Amazon Prime, Uh, you gave.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
Words of wisdom. Though you're you're you're the jiu jitsu whisper,
I am the jus was. Do you remember this conversation.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
I remember him saying that he was nervous what he
had to do, and we told him that he trained
from his whole life don't get stuck in the moment.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
Think about everything you've done to get there, and you'll
be fine. Six and oh in its tournament, he took
home first place, and he's got to thank you. There's
so many people to thank. I gotta thank mom, I
gotta take my daddy. I got to thank my brother's sister.
But guys, I gotta take anybody else that knows jiu
jitsu or the spirit of a line. It's too cool
buys more more joke out on the sea burn he
(31:55):
was there with joke outill, Thank you are you? Everything
is for Joe.
Speaker 3 (31:59):
I went six and oh today.
Speaker 1 (32:02):
I just want to tell her. There's a podcast out there.
Speaker 3 (32:07):
Changed my jujitsu career. It's called too Cool Up.
Speaker 1 (32:13):
It took sporting advice from a man who's got the
body of a melting candle. The names choke Out, Dust Joe,
and one guy that's half an as you did. That's
for you, Stevie.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
He came up and took the trophy immediately. Thank you right,
thank you Stone Wow.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
You were a big part of that. Well, you know
what we inspire, it's what we do here to You
went to a Rams game, La Rams. You were undefeated
there as well as well, and on the Jumbo Tron,
and you made it on ESPN quests. That's right. I
remember watching the game. I was like, get the fuck
out of here.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
The guy came over, He's like, don't pay attention to us.
So me and Jiggy pretend to have a fake conversation,
and he was all really perfect, like if you notice one,
if you know, because.
Speaker 1 (32:56):
You're talking to Jiggy, you can be more Jiggy than Yes.
I go to jigg and I'm like, oh what we
would just using my hands a lot. Yeah, And then I.
Speaker 3 (33:04):
And the guy was like, that's enough.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
But you guys, you guys won the game. We did
that game.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
That was a big comeback game too for a boy
justin Herbert.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
Yeah, I want it.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
That's like it.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
Next year though, they're gonna go all the way. He's
gonna wear the ring and win the Stanley Cup.
Speaker 1 (33:19):
Next question, Next question sports sports. This is coming ups
from Grace. Hey, Mommy's how do you deal with anger?
I think that changes as you get older? Yeah, definitely older.
Speaker 3 (33:35):
When I was younger, you were a short fused guy,
you know.
Speaker 1 (33:38):
You when I was younger, Yeah for sure, Yeah, for sure,
and then you get older, you're just like you're too
tired to be angry almost, but also you have more
to lose.
Speaker 2 (33:47):
Yeah, that you talked about their road road rage thing
once where kids were in the car.
Speaker 1 (33:51):
Sure that was that was your way of saying, don't
tell that fucking story again.
Speaker 2 (33:57):
Like remember when you told that story three times already.
Speaker 1 (34:00):
So I met this kid in Connecticut. He showed up himself.
Speaker 2 (34:02):
Good job is there, I did. I don't think I
ever really had a short fuse. I only remember one time,
one time I got and I had.
Speaker 1 (34:13):
This one time Murray.
Speaker 2 (34:15):
I didn't really have short fuses. But I wouldn't even
say I deal with my anger. I kind of just
like I try to let it. People say that we
like you, let'stuff roll.
Speaker 3 (34:24):
Off your back.
Speaker 2 (34:25):
Yeah, I think that's a way of not really addressing
what's bothering you.
Speaker 1 (34:28):
Though sometimes I I've just come to learn that anger
will subside. Anger is temporary, And so I've gotten to
a point where I'm like, Okay, you're fucking angry, get
it out. Let's take a walk. And I'll go take
a walk. I'll get some fresh air, I'll listen to
some music, and i'll just mule through what it is.
And again to quote, you take stock of what it is.
But it's just temporary and solvable for sure. Yeah yeah, right, yeah,
(34:53):
So I it's a man made problem, so there's a
man made solution. A look at that, great John F. Kennedy.
John F.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
Kennedy said, yeah, yeah, I was saying, because smart you should. No,
don't take that, because somebody's gonna write in angrily. It's
gonna be writing the comments.
Speaker 3 (35:06):
You're no JF guy.
Speaker 2 (35:10):
I've never really, I've never really had felt like I've
got let anger get the best of me.
Speaker 3 (35:16):
I only once in college.
Speaker 2 (35:17):
I remember that I was I was angry that a
guy was dancing with a girl that I liked at
the club and I stepped up. He had thrown a
look at me, and I had stepped up and said
what And I said what? I said I And I
said you know, I said, what.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
Are you doing? You know?
Speaker 3 (35:31):
I said, you know that you know that I like
her and blah blah, and the kid was like, oh.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
Yea, all right, all right, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. And
I was like, but the kid was thinking of me,
And I was like, why is this kid saying? And
I turned around and Mungo was behind me, my one
of my frat brothers.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
Well, and Mungo doesn't sound small he was.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
He was like literally like like a rottwhiler on the chain,
like he was like waiting to go, waiting for me
to say.
Speaker 3 (35:49):
And I turn around. I instantly switched.
Speaker 1 (35:50):
I was like, oh no, no, no, no, welcome, calm down
God and I turned into like the pasifist stopped it all. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (35:56):
I remember what time there was a huge fight at
a bar and it's spilled out onto the streets and
now all my friends were fighting, and this one guy
comes up to me.
Speaker 3 (36:05):
And he comes up to me and he guess right,
he has his hands up and I go, I.
Speaker 2 (36:08):
Go uhhing, I said, no, thank you, he's just punch
somebody else.
Speaker 1 (36:15):
Oh that's great. One of my favorite videos. You ever
see that video of a fight breaking out and there's
just this Chinese kid and he's eating a bowl of
the noodles and the fight breaks out. He doesn't even
he doesn't even look. He just goes like this and
walks out of frame and keeps eating his noodles. I
was like, yeah, that's anybody in their forties, I think
in your twenties, you're like, hey, guys, what's going on.
You want to be peacemaker and stuff. I think you
(36:35):
get to a point just like fuck oh they'll work
it out. Yeah, yeah, everybody.
Speaker 2 (36:39):
I feel like everybody's getting punched everywhere nowadays too. You
see these videos like they're in McDonald's, they're in Target,
they're in Walmart, they're in a library.
Speaker 1 (36:45):
Like there's no place that's safe. No, no, oh, somebody
told me. I think sometimes they get angry again. When
you're driving, people are constantly constantly doing incredibly rude, really
dangerous shit on. I think driving's got more aggressive, for
sure in the last ten years. I'm blown away at
the times I get cut off. And before I would
(37:08):
kind of speed up or whatever, and now I'm just like,
all right, just go the far right, give it ten seconds,
just chill out. I forget my story. I forget what
oh oh, this is it. So somebody was telling me
that their father, when somebody would tailgate them where they'd
see somebody fly by or whatever. I thought, this is
such a good line. Their father would always would always
(37:28):
kind of pull over to the right and go, yeah,
go get them, and so that kind of pops in
my head. Now when I hear that, I'm like, that's
such a funny line.
Speaker 2 (37:38):
There is there is not There are not many things
in life that are give you a fill of satisfaction
and pry and just just so happy to be alive.
Is when somebody's being an ass on the road and
about a quarter of a mile.
Speaker 1 (37:50):
You see the wreck and the fireball and you're like,
in their dad, Yeah, that makes me smile. Oh I
love Yes. Next question, I was gonna say, pulled over,
but you know it is the best when you're like.
Speaker 3 (38:03):
Again, I'm like, roll down the window. You're like, hey,
was it jerk?
Speaker 1 (38:06):
Was that ass? Here we go. This is coming us
from Austin. Austin, Okay. Question for the podcast. How do
you guys exude so much confidence? I've always feared public
speaking or speaking to new people in general. I always
go through scenarios in my head if I said the
right thing, if the conversation went well, et cetera. Any
advice for building confidence.
Speaker 2 (38:25):
Something I heard early on in my life that stuck
with me was people don't care as much as you think.
Speaker 3 (38:32):
Oh yeah, I think that's a big thing.
Speaker 2 (38:34):
Like you're you're up there all nervous like oh whatever,
like and if you like people are just like, okay,
what do you have to say? Like you put so
much pressure on the audience looking, But think about the
time you're in the audience and you're sitting there, like
watching someone speak, Sure, what are you doing? You're sitting
there and listening like you're not like, oh, I can't
wait the list person messages up or something like that.
Speaker 3 (38:52):
So I think that was a minor thing for me.
Speaker 2 (38:54):
That really was like people just don't really care as
much as you think when you're up there speaking.
Speaker 1 (38:57):
They just someone I want to say, and you especially.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
Public speaking, that's a big fear for people too, though,
like public speeding, they'd rather die.
Speaker 1 (39:04):
Yeah, I thought they were like speak public speaker.
Speaker 3 (39:06):
Yeah, a lot of people.
Speaker 1 (39:07):
I mean we're the real heroes, we are, yeah, I
mean first responders, like the military flyovers is like.
Speaker 3 (39:13):
No, I mean they're not even stopping, they're just flying over.
Speaker 1 (39:17):
I mean we're getting in there.
Speaker 3 (39:18):
We're getting in there, mixing it up with the people.
Speaker 1 (39:19):
Yeah, really doing the hard stuff.
Speaker 3 (39:21):
Chopping it up. I never really did you have a
fear of public speaking.
Speaker 1 (39:26):
I think when you first start, Dana, for sure, yeah,
I mean it took two or three years. But I
always say it's just like imagine platform diving. Right, you're
ten meters, twenty five meters, thirty meters, So the first
one hundred times you do it, yeah, you're gonna be
a little scared. The one hundred and first you're like,
all right, I've done this, Now I can do my
gain or whatever. It is helped the thing, so let's
get used to it. Yeah, but I think it terms
(39:47):
about younger though, like before stand up, like when you
were Yeah, of course you get nervous, but I was
like Stevie rally, I did like little routines and stuff
for five minutes take it through that. I don't I
don't know what I would it's all kind of a blurb,
but I would do.
Speaker 3 (40:03):
Here about Stevie's pep rally routine.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
I would do. I would do like five minutes before
the pep rally and just tell jokes or pull up
my current at the frog doll and do an impression
and stuff. And it's just like there was humili I'm
sure it was humiliated, but but at the time like
it it was doing well. Yeah I got laughs.
Speaker 2 (40:22):
Yeah, so you had a Kermit and you did the
Kermit voice.
Speaker 1 (40:26):
Yeah. Like at pep rallies and stuff, I would do
like dances or just anything for attention and laughs. Yeah, anything,
but it was humiliating. Yeah. I think like in terms
of like building up confidence, I wholehrdly agree with you
about people don't think as much as you do. And
I think if anything, people appreciate effort, whether if you're
a stranger in a situation you Hey, I'm Steve, how
(40:48):
are you just like, hey, thanks for taking the time
to Yeah, of course, who's not gonna who's not gonna
knock that.
Speaker 2 (40:54):
I think talking more in smaller groups also helps more
you're speaking to strangers, because that's all speaking is. Yeah,
it's speaking to strangers and then speaking to a group
of strangers.
Speaker 3 (41:03):
So a way that helps is baby stuff.
Speaker 2 (41:06):
Like you said about the thing is like about diving,
is like talk to people out and about, then talk
to groups out, approach smaller groups out and about, and
before you know it, you'll be fine.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
Yeah, And he's he's walking himself through scenarios of like
saying what if it went well, what if I did this?
What if you just stopped and just did it? You know,
you could sit there and talk yourself out of talking
to a girl that you think is pretty across the bar.
Think about a hundred things you could say or a
hundred reasons why you shouldn't do it. But you just
got to shut out all off and just go and
trust your instincts. You're a good person. I'm sure you are.
(41:36):
Most people are. So he's one of our listeners. Of course,
he's a great mom. He's an honorary cool mom who
deserves some T shirt.
Speaker 3 (41:44):
That's right, merch Yeah, link in the bio next week.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
There we go. Okay, well, we did it. We did
we really did it.
Speaker 2 (41:51):
You know, I think we've we've helped at least two
to seven people and across the board.
Speaker 1 (41:57):
Yeah, and we've helped rectify our friendship. As you came
in hot hot, I texted one, two, three, four and
forgot you got a phone call. That's right from this guy.
Speaker 2 (42:08):
Okay, Well, rest on your laurels until the next time
you don't text me back.
Speaker 3 (42:12):
Okay, you got it.
Speaker 1 (42:13):
We'll give you this one. We'll give you that. So
har No, we did it. Thank everybody for listening too.
Speaker 3 (42:17):
Cools Moms, buye.
Speaker 1 (42:19):
T shirt Bye T shirt. Yeah, that's non existent. These
two cool mommies love you, so show us some love.
Speaker 2 (42:25):
Please rate us, review us, follow us on all social media,
and subscribe to our YouTube
There was a problem where taking money.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
All right, welcome, Oh we match color scheme wise, Welcome
to two cool moms.
Speaker 3 (00:13):
I am Joe Gatto.
Speaker 2 (00:14):
Hi, I'm Steve Burn also known as don't text back
here we are. So four sent messages to you. Over
the course of a couple of days. Zero response is back,
and then I get her response back.
Speaker 3 (00:30):
It's like, hey, how are you?
Speaker 1 (00:33):
While I was sitting next to you. No, but we
talked on the phone. I called you, remember, Yeah, I'll
call you negate that I did.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Take that out of the mixture, right.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
You're right, Hey, they did.
Speaker 3 (00:47):
I'm not. I'm not above admitting I'm wrong. I'm wrong.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
Turn your never.
Speaker 3 (00:55):
That's great.
Speaker 1 (00:55):
I can show you how I.
Speaker 2 (00:57):
Went to the Quad Cities and I loved it.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
What is the Quad City QC's I went to. I
bought this.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
I wanted to show Jiggy this. So the Quad Cities,
it changes, well, it depends when you asked. But it's
like Mollin, East Moleen, Davenport and uh Miami.
Speaker 1 (01:13):
I'm not sure.
Speaker 2 (01:16):
But I asked like five different people when I was
going around town, and they were always they always named
a different one. So I couldn't get a straight answer
at anybody. But I think it's it's like a thing there.
But we found it too. I was very upset that
you weren't with us because we found some men's shops
and we did some men's shopping.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
I walked in.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
I thought, you're gonna love. A couple of them were great. Yeah,
I there was little sleeper hits there and just taking
a nap. Ski and Davenport joke out and be like.
Speaker 1 (01:42):
Hey, no, there's no subtle Joe entering a shop. Yeah,
I'm here.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
I like to be I like to let people know
I'm here and ready to go.
Speaker 1 (01:50):
This This is a question I have for you. Sure,
because you like to go out on the road. You
like to drop a dime on some clothing a shop local.
Do you bring a lot back and then check your
bag or you what do you do disposable.
Speaker 3 (02:05):
Last stuff with me and throw it out? You just
chuck it on the floor.
Speaker 1 (02:08):
The on the I've seen you ripped shirts.
Speaker 3 (02:09):
I ripped them off.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
Sometimes they make it a joke if it's this weekend.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
I couldn't button a shirt legit, couldn't even button.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
It when I went to put it on, and I
had to Justin was with us, and I had to
send them back to the hotel room to get me
a different outfit because I didn't. I was in a
rush to get there, so I was like, I'll just
grab this and I went to button it and I.
Speaker 1 (02:23):
Did the oh no, it wasn't even close it really, you.
Speaker 3 (02:27):
Know like sometimes you like, I'll get it.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
It was like nipsymmetrical, yeah, hiroish oh no, And I
was like oh. And I was like, I'll just wear
it open, but I when was the last time you
wear that shirt?
Speaker 3 (02:38):
The late eighteens.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
And I had a stained undershirt because it was an undershirt.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
I was like, oh, it doesn't matter. I couldn't wear
it open because.
Speaker 3 (02:46):
I had a big coffee stain.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Did you so you could wear one of your merch shirt?
Speaker 3 (02:50):
I don't like that. My merch hairt is a big
is my face?
Speaker 1 (02:54):
You don't want to do that?
Speaker 3 (02:54):
Yeah, you're right, Yeah, yes I didn't.
Speaker 1 (02:56):
I wasn't gonna do that.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
I have done that before when I took my shirt
off and threw it into the crowd, because I've seen that,
you know, they they've you know, the people got to
get the people they want.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
And I've thrown on a merch shirt before.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
We always laughed because in the first season of Jokers,
he used to wear, un ironically around town a true
TV shirt of his own thing.
Speaker 3 (03:17):
And we found that weird and we always made fun
of him for it.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
And uh, he got called out by two cops at
the Staaten Island Ferry really like, hey, you have murder
and practicing jokes and goes, yeah, he's wearing the fucking shirt.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
He doesn't mind being recognized, does He's.
Speaker 3 (03:33):
Somebody that's the people's people.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Did you?
Speaker 3 (03:36):
Did you ever?
Speaker 2 (03:37):
What was your biggest merch item that you've that you've done.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
I'm not a big merch guy. I don't like doing it.
I don't like standing there, I don't like like, I
don't like like taking the card and hi. Yeah, I
just I'd rather do anything but that. Really. Yeah, I
love doing the performing. I love dipping. But I used
to have a Sausage Party t shirt, yes, where it
was like a five silhouetted like boy band poses and
(04:01):
it said Sausage Party World Tour and then listed all
the cities I was in that year and I did it,
and yeah, girls bought it, but no dudes ever bought
it because if they wanted a thing with sausage party
A yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Which is kind of funny, let's get into it.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
But I did sausage Party. I did a crowd work
show in Nashville on Monday. And I've done that bit.
I mean twelve fifteen years I've done it. It's a
fun bit. I love doing it because I never know
what's going to happen. The audience leaves there, they're so happy.
But but this I brought this guy up, this black guy,
(04:42):
and he was you know, you always you kind of
have the black guy go last because you're like, all right,
he's probably godn't know what he's doing, right dancer this rhythm.
I've done this bit again twelve to fifteen years. I've
seen many versions of it. This was hands down. I
have video of it. Somebody took video of it. I have,
hands down, this is the best one I've ever seen.
Speaker 3 (05:04):
Wow, there's a bold stay.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
There's a woman named Noreen who became part of the show.
She in her sixties. I was just you know, she
was fun. When I called her up on stage, the
crowd chanted her name. I was like, Wow, this is
gonna be fun. Okay, cool. So she comes up. She's
a great sport. She's smiling, she's excited to be there.
It's like price is right. She gets on stage like yeah,
black guy. She The reason I said it is like
(05:29):
I was like, oh, you get to cross something off
your bucket list. And she goes, oh Steven, I go yes,
and I put the mic down. She goes, I've had
black and I was like, oh my, and the crowd
again she had nor Reen Noreen. It was like, okay,
we're off to the races. So I completely had forgotten
this guy had brought up. I'd't seen him in a while.
He used to be security at the club. A former marine.
(05:53):
Super nice guy, kind of you know under underspoken, doesn't
not outgoing, you know. She's kind of like comes up
up and he just puts his hands up to her.
She puts her hands in his and he literally just
picks her up and just starts drilling her in the
air and she is like bucking on like an and
(06:13):
she is dying laughing. Her head is snapping back, she's laughing.
She go who and he's like hitting her, but then
he does the old rapid punch. He's like, she's just
like this. It was like a.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Magic mic moment.
Speaker 1 (06:29):
I fell to the ground. I was crying. I was
laughing so hard. And then we had another four minutes
after that bit. But I have the video. I'll send
it a well institute in this or whatever. But could
have been my favorite one I've ever seen, standing ovation
after Sawtage Party, which I've seen a handful of times,
but this one was like everybody wrapped hers up top.
It was sold out, everybody stood up and it was
(06:51):
one of those great moments.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Do you think that Noreens Night started with sure, I
go catch a comedy show.
Speaker 3 (06:56):
Next thing she knows, she's.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Being levitated by a reg Democrat two hundred and fifty
strangers her name yelling Norrin.
Speaker 1 (07:07):
She's like, this is my life.
Speaker 3 (07:09):
I hope she went out till I got hit by
a truck and died, because.
Speaker 1 (07:12):
That's a great Now again better yeah, it'll never get better. Yeah.
She was in her sixties, and I really thought before
she did it, I was teasing her. I was like,
don't die, yeah, you know, as like a line. But
when she was getting bucked, I was like, oh, seriously,
don't die. I mean, I'm really she was getting chucked,
and then.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
That's so fun.
Speaker 1 (07:35):
For no walk it off, Nourene walk it off, because
the danger with that bit is sometimes you get Here's
what I've learned the last few years is when I
first did it, I was a guy my twenty or
you know, early thirties. When I started doing, I think,
and you could pick out girls kind of like your
own age. It was fun. Something happened in the last
four or five years were young girls with all the
(07:56):
me too stuff and everything, they don't want any part
of it. I've had a handful of girls just like No,
I didn't I didn't ask for this. I've had a
few get up and walk out. And then what I've
had is I've brought up like a woman in her
forties and fifties or like a sixties and they go bananas.
Well they're they're in a different mindset too, right, Oh yeah,
(08:16):
they don't give a shit. They're grabbing ass, they're feeling
the guys they're getting like really hands I.
Speaker 2 (08:20):
Had a that reminds me of a I had a
very handsy coworker when I was in my late twenties
named Ricky Party City nice fella. I worked with this
older woman I think her name was Alison, not Hundreercent.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
She always either Alice or Allison. But she was super.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
She was like in her late fifties maybe sixties, working
to register at Party City, and she would always like
corner me in the stock room be like help me
with this box.
Speaker 3 (08:46):
Like it was really weird.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
And I was like, it's so funny to think, like
she was like she couldn't wait to go to work.
Speaker 3 (08:53):
She was like, I'm gonna get stock.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
But it's so funny to see, like when you get
hit on by older women when you're older, or even
when you're younger, I guess, but like when you're when
you're when you're younger, it's just like super weird because
like it's like sometimes like you're attracted back, and do
you remember like a couple of cougar moments you had
where you're like, oh, I'm talking about when you were younger.
It was like oh yeah, yeah, yeah, she still got it.
Speaker 1 (09:17):
Oh yeah, sure, yeah. I love that they did that.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
That was my favorite thing about Golden Girls, that they
made Blanche, the way they made her. Oh that was
so phenomenal, Like even before like think about when they
made that TV show, right sure, Like that was such
a smart, fun move to make her just like own her.
Speaker 1 (09:32):
A sexuality old on Sullivan and Sudden, we did that
with Christine. She was very promiscuous. But the thing we
did on our show, which had never been seen in television,
which we always loved, is that Christine and Owen Benjamin
her Son, it was always like are they having sex?
(09:54):
Like they were? They were always so comfortable with each
other sexually, and they would be each other's wingman or
wing person. But they would also say things where just
like they'd leave, We're like, are they banging? Like should
we call the cops? Like this is weird? There was
an episode where oh, we did a karaoke episode and
they were singing like yes, I remember, like they were
(10:16):
like banging each other. We're like, what is going on?
It was That was the dynamic I really really liked
on our show. Oh my God, and she's she's just fantastic.
But anytime the old trope of the older sexualized woman
was always fun.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
My mom's relationship was very much like Owen Benjamin and
Christine's with me and my mom.
Speaker 3 (10:36):
As she got older.
Speaker 2 (10:37):
Really, my mom was active, okay, and that's a polite
way of yeah, because she came up anyway, became Yeah,
she became a widow at fifty two. No, if she
was even that old, I don't even know she was
fifty two. Yeah, I think she was fifty two. Right,
So she was young and vibrant her whole life, right,
And she was a good looking lady. Mom Duke's uh
silver fox, you know, turned some heads.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
And when you have a great personality as well, or
it's tough not to.
Speaker 3 (11:03):
Say she was ugly about her personality was no, no, no.
Speaker 1 (11:05):
No, you're saying she's good looking. But when you have
that together, you know what I mean, when when you're
a little older, personality goes so fucking you're killing it.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
Yeah, look at me, Look at me crushing it. Crushing it.
Speaker 1 (11:17):
Stand back form the line to the left, silver funks.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:25):
So my mother and not very much like she would
talk about very openly about her dating life and then
like her first quarter, like the first church, Like if
I came off from day whatever, I think, so she'd be.
Speaker 1 (11:35):
Like sitping a cofee and home moo. She'd be like,
so did you bang?
Speaker 2 (11:41):
Sal is always super like uncomfortable around me, and my
mother too, because I've always just talk about anything with
my mom and and I'd be like my mom, like
I go what. I would go out with Sal and Sala.
Sometimes we'll come back to my house and crash. We
would just hanging out whatever. And we wake up and
behind breakfast with my mom. She's like, so, boys, I
was at night last Like, like, Mom, you should have
seen the ass on this one.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
She's like, tell me, you.
Speaker 3 (12:02):
Know, like that.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
But we had that like kind of open relationship too.
I hope that my kids are comfortable like that because my.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
Niece and they're going to be they have no true
my niece.
Speaker 2 (12:11):
And nephew just started being uh, they went to college
right now, so they're eighteen. They're eighteen years old, freshman's
in college, and they have My sister has a very.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
Good rapport with them as well. Sure they're very open
about talking.
Speaker 1 (12:22):
About but your sisters, like you, they're very outgoing. Yeah,
I would be hard pressed to think that they'd be
recluse to around the kids or whatever.
Speaker 2 (12:31):
I think outgoing parents though, because it's a different dynamic
with your kids and you have with you know, being
outgoing with your kids doesn't Outgoing isn't really a word
you use for your parents, right, because your parents are
the outgoing is like for strangers. So, but if your
parents are approachable or sure outspoken, maybe.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
Right, right, there's a big difference between approachable and outspoke
one hundred percent. I would I would assume that your
mother is probably was probably outspoken, very vibrant. Yes, what
I guess, sure, yeah, sure you never met her never? No, No,
she goes by the grave.
Speaker 3 (13:06):
We go by the grave.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
You bring it up all the time. So, yeah, my folk,
my father is always approachable. My father, dad is he's like,
he's just a he's a great dude.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
So he's one of those guys that he always feels
like your uncle, you know, he's got that vibe about it.
Speaker 3 (13:21):
Yeah, he's you're instantly part of his family.
Speaker 1 (13:23):
Yeah, all the kids always like my dad. My dad
would always come to the comedy sets, the comics love
my father. He's just a great dude, very outgoing, but
but still like a father. You know. He's not my buddy,
he's not my friend. He's like he's my dad. And
my mom is just just the sweetest little lady that
can barely She gets so insecure about her English that
(13:46):
she gets really inhibited, should get quiet and but She's
the most brutally honest woman I've ever met in my life.
She remember my wife, Jessica, her younger sister Amanda, uh,
look very similar, and then Lindsay doesn't really look like them,
but you know, you could tell their sisters, but jess
(14:07):
and Amanda look alike. And then Lindsay, you know, anyways,
could be like a cousin. But they're all sisters, right,
And so my mom knows Jessica knows Amanda, and meeting
Lindsay for the first time, to this day, I can't
believe she said this. She goes, she goes, oh, hi,
She's like, yeah, I'm a Lindsay, I'm Jessica's sister. She goes, oh, sister,
(14:27):
you look weird. I was like, oh no, oh no,
you just feel yourself leaving your body and you're instantly like,
grab the tools. I gotta do patchwork. I gotta fucking
fix this.
Speaker 2 (14:39):
And she's like, oh, I mean it's just your eyes
they're too far apart.
Speaker 1 (14:45):
But unusual to the other two. My mom doesn't have
the dense vocabulary, so that's what she said. And I'm
just like, oh, for fox sake, so that's great. I
don't get stuck like it did. Apologize the next like
twenty times a solid. By the way, my mom, you
know she wasn't. Fuck. You look weird?
Speaker 3 (15:05):
Weird?
Speaker 1 (15:06):
Who wants to hear that?
Speaker 3 (15:07):
I get that all the time.
Speaker 1 (15:09):
You look weird?
Speaker 3 (15:09):
Yeah, no, yeah, I get that.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
Why why would you look weird?
Speaker 3 (15:15):
I mean, look at me, I'm a weird looking fella.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
I don't think so.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
I mean my body type is very weird. Well, like
all all my fats in my stomach right pretty much.
Speaker 1 (15:26):
I look at my arms.
Speaker 3 (15:27):
Look, I look kind of jacked.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
You look like if you were in the ocean from
here up. He's kind of like a good looking Yeah.
And then and then you get out and it's like
getting fish start flowing to the top, just dead fish.
Speaker 3 (15:45):
Oh it's low tide.
Speaker 1 (15:47):
Kids are screaming, hell's weird, like on the whistle, helicopter's
coming in. Weird weird. But you you admit you don't
do anything. No, I say, do you want to take
a walk. I don't take a walk for what? Yeah,
(16:09):
you don't. You don't three blocks? You don't exercise at all. No.
Speaker 2 (16:12):
I used to work on my feet a lot, and
I don't any excuse me. I used to work on
my feet a lot.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
So you considered working on your feet that was exercise
for sure.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
I mean, if you don't sit down for all day,
you know, there's the difference. Now I sit down at
your computer, I'm right, and I'm doing whatever. You know,
But like it's I was used to be not sit for.
Speaker 3 (16:26):
You know, twelve to fourteen hours a day.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Sure, it's crazy you're up and around you when you're
getting your steps in. Do you not get steps in
at all?
Speaker 3 (16:32):
Like it is something?
Speaker 1 (16:33):
Do you when's the last time you had the gumption
to be like, I should get off the couch and
do something. I should do something like for my health.
I'm pretty sure it was two thousand and four, Joseph,
jose you know that's not good to not be somewhat active. No,
I'm yeah, because when we're on the road, I've mentioned
(16:54):
it to you, but like, hey, we should take it,
you know whatever. But you you walk through shops and stuff.
So I walk about town, you walk about town. Maybe
that's considered.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
I guess you're gonna get step I'm not just like,
oh we're going lethargic, big fatty.
Speaker 3 (17:09):
I don't mind it.
Speaker 1 (17:10):
Yeah, I probably should. You could do more?
Speaker 3 (17:14):
Well, we all could.
Speaker 1 (17:15):
Of course I should, I absolutely could. But but you,
I think you.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
Was That's something people say, what because like I should
do more? And I'm owning that I should definitely do more.
And I answered, we all could do more. I'll throw
it in a royal way like no, it's like I
get it.
Speaker 1 (17:32):
I get it. But Joe, we're talking about you.
Speaker 3 (17:34):
Yeah, yeah, I'll do more.
Speaker 1 (17:35):
You know what?
Speaker 3 (17:41):
How was that? I'm not sitting around all day now.
This is my job now is sit.
Speaker 1 (17:44):
Around and walk to you and she do the hokey pokey.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Turn myself around and then you're done. That's what it's
all about. All right here, we want to help some Americans.
Speaker 1 (17:53):
Here we go. We're here for you. We have all
the answers. Thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Never ends at two Cool Moms pod on the instagrams,
follow us, subscribe, subscribe, but I don't you know what,
I don't care you guys don't want to follow us,
don't do it. I'm not gonna force you. It's fine,
that's fine. We're here doing it anyway. To the seven people,
you seven of you is listening.
Speaker 1 (18:15):
Coming to us from Natalie. Hi, Mommy's how do you
deal with feeling? How do you deal with feelings? Stuck
in life? I get up and take a walk. When's
the last time you were in a rut? I mean,
I'm still in one. Do you consider yourself still in
a rut?
Speaker 3 (18:34):
I would say I'm at the precipice of the rut.
Speaker 1 (18:37):
I'm stay active with work. I say, act you're always working?
Speaker 3 (18:40):
Well, no, I say acting with work? I say acted
with I would you know?
Speaker 2 (18:44):
I'm invested heavily in the in the in the children's
which is good. I wouldn't consider myself I was in
a Yeah, I'm out of a rut. I wouldn't say
I'm in a rut anymore. Yeah it's nothing. I mean,
come on, it's been you know, over a year. You
gotta you gotta, you gotta get it on to move
with yourself.
Speaker 1 (18:56):
Yeah, yeah, you gotta do something. What are you gonna
sit there and poor er?
Speaker 3 (19:01):
I did that for too long.
Speaker 2 (19:02):
I eat nice cream and just sitting on the couch
watching you know, Oprah reruns on Peacock.
Speaker 3 (19:10):
Like what am I doing?
Speaker 2 (19:11):
So I would say I was in a rut for
a minute, but I think I'm out of the rod. Yeah, yeah,
I might be driving with despare though you know what
I'm saying.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
Really you think that, yeah, I would say that. I
would say I'm driving with the spare when you know
what I think, and feel free to edit this out.
Feel free to edit this out because because sometimes.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
You don't want to get too personal, right, I wouldn't
say I'm in a run anymore.
Speaker 1 (19:37):
I would say I'm almost out of the rut, almost reutless.
That's your edited points. That's why you did it, That's
why we got You're right.
Speaker 3 (19:43):
We did edit all that out.
Speaker 1 (19:48):
Yeah, okay, Well, I'm glad to hear you're not in
a rut, and you never seem like you were in one.
By the way, you you do a great job at
compartmentalizing for sure.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
Everything you have to keep the train moving, right, that's it.
Speaker 1 (20:00):
Yeah, Well she's stuck.
Speaker 3 (20:01):
So what she said? What do you do when you
feel stuck?
Speaker 2 (20:04):
The first thing I would say is probably try to
identify what caused you to get stuck, right, You have
to work through that first.
Speaker 3 (20:11):
It could be anything, It could be something. You know.
This happens with a lot of people, too, is what.
Speaker 2 (20:14):
I have a lot of friends that this has happened
to something that seems minor completely derails you and you
don't realize it until you're derailed, you.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
Know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (20:23):
Yeah, like if a relationship falls apart, or a you know,
or you lose a job or some of those are
big things and you're like, oh, that's why I'm stuck.
But some people are just like wanted something that happened
didn't happen, had a you know, a bad night out
with a friend and it didn't like go out the
way they wanted to where they gotten a little bit
of a tiff and it was like, oh, that's nothing,
and it realizes it becomes something.
Speaker 3 (20:44):
So I think the first part is.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
To identify while you're stuck and see if it's a
big reason. Well you have to work on that anyway, right,
you have to get a new job, sure, get back
on their different relationships.
Speaker 3 (20:55):
Figure that part out. But it's a little thing.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
I think that's where more of the work is needed,
because you have to really dig down and take.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
A real look and to see like, oh, this is
what it is. Smart to take stock of how big
of an issue it ultimately is. You know.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
Yeah, I mean do you feel I feel like you
get you feel like you're stuck a lot me personally,
but you work through it every time.
Speaker 1 (21:17):
Oh yeah, yeah, I mean the worst thing to do
is just sit there and oh the world, you know,
the just feeling sorry for yourself. It's like, you know,
I think when I get in those situations, it's like
it takes a day or two and I just and
then just something comes over me like fuck it, you're
gonna bitch about this all day and are you gonna
do something about it? So what are we gonna do?
This is the situation you want to It's like complaining
(21:39):
about the weather. It's out of your control. Just shut
the fuck up and get to work.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
That's a great analogy. It's like complaining about the weather
because that.
Speaker 1 (21:46):
Really is Yeah, you can't do anything about it.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
Like I will say that too about the other thing, too,
is like I've learned this, you know, kind of the
hard way too, is like nobody helps you, but you nobody,
Like you can have friends who are there for you
and help you through, but the end of the day,
it's one on you.
Speaker 1 (22:01):
Oh, you're going to be stuck until you start moving.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
Even if if somebody's trying to push the car out
of the mud, you guys still step on the gas,
you know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (22:08):
It's like you're in charge of it.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
Did you make that up?
Speaker 3 (22:10):
I did? That's pretty good.
Speaker 1 (22:11):
That was a pretty good one. All right. That's something
you'd expect to hear from like a priest or like
Tyler Perry or Yeah, I present the blessing Father Father,
Tyler Perry. There we go. That's a great a little
you just made that up?
Speaker 3 (22:25):
I did. Yeah, So you've inspired me to motivate.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
Where you got to come up with a calendar?
Speaker 3 (22:30):
I have a bunch of motivational little sayings.
Speaker 2 (22:32):
Actually, yeah, give me one more. Life sucks sometimes, you all,
you gotta do a suck harder.
Speaker 1 (22:38):
My next question, here's a question coming us from Hannah.
Where's the merch? Oh? You know what?
Speaker 2 (22:47):
The demand the demands are coming in, so we're going
to have to start doing it. This is like the
third or fourth time I've heard it. We have to answer,
we have to answer with it. And I guess you
know what link is going to be in the bio
to uh get a two cool moms?
Speaker 3 (23:00):
What are we gonna do? A shirt?
Speaker 1 (23:00):
What do you wanna do a shirt? Or saying you
know what I like?
Speaker 3 (23:05):
I like Bazancres.
Speaker 2 (23:07):
I'd love that saying that's my favorite thing we've said
over the fifteen plus episodes.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
You said it, well, you jumped on it. I jumped
on on that episode and I love it.
Speaker 3 (23:15):
Do you not want it to be what I've said?
You want to be what you've said?
Speaker 1 (23:17):
I wanted to be Bizoncres. No. Well you're you're gonna
say something, go ahead, No, No, I think Bezocres is good.
Two cool moms yes and end quotes yan Yang Parmesan.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
Yang Parmisan. Yeah, Yingang Parmesan's great. Yeah, we should put
a pizza pie. That's the ying Yang on it.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
I mean, the simple one is just to have the
two cool.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
Moms, like the logo on a on then our nuggets,
you know what faces this is.
Speaker 1 (23:44):
But you know what we should sell more than I
think we should.
Speaker 2 (23:46):
I think we should sell a coffee munk ah. That's
smart as mom is having their coffees, that's right, and
then listening, you know, yep, let's do it all.
Speaker 3 (23:56):
Right, let's get on it. All right, we'll talk to
our merch department.
Speaker 2 (23:59):
J all right, honorary honorary mom, mommy.
Speaker 3 (24:06):
That's great, that's pretty cool. That's pretty cool. An honorary mommy.
Speaker 1 (24:12):
I mean, we just gave it to you.
Speaker 2 (24:14):
You know what, maybe we should another one we can
put it is get talking to a fucking microphone, you idiot,
because he's here, he is again, without a micro we
can't hear him. We can hear him in the room,
and he's now everybody now we gotta do subtitles.
Speaker 1 (24:28):
Yep. Well there's no WI in it. You you doing
total Why don't you have a microphone?
Speaker 3 (24:37):
It's facing nothing. The microphone right now is just facing nothing.
It's straight up in the air.
Speaker 1 (24:46):
This is coming to us, I think I think we
answered something similar to this. This is coming us from Marissa. Okay,
how did you two meet? What is something you've learned
about yourself or became in through your friendship with one another?
So that's the part that's different. That's why I picked it.
Speaker 3 (25:04):
Oh that's nice.
Speaker 1 (25:05):
That's been inspiring through Well, we met. We discussed this
before we met. When when your show is premiering? My
show was premiering my last three seasons and whatever. You
have like three homes. So I think the thing that
I find most inspiring about you is is there is
a relentless positivity that you don't just exude, but I
(25:28):
really feel is a part of your person, like a
part of you. You just are a very upbeat, positive person.
I think that's part of the reason why your show
is so successful, because it's not only what you see
on screen, but it permeates to the set. I think
that's why you've had the same people working there for
(25:50):
so many years. But everywhere we go, everywhere we go,
you treat everybody the same. You treat the security guard,
you treat the house manager, you treat the clerk at
whatever boutique shop you walk into, or the coffee shop.
Everybody's a friend, and you do live by that mantra
of be kind. I really think you do do that,
(26:11):
Unlike like Ellen, who was preaching it but you know
you heard horror stories about but like you genuinely are
that individual. And I know that even on days where
you've received, you know, less than promising news, it takes
a minute to get that out of you because you
can see it because you're just kind of like moving
(26:33):
on and everything, but you just you don't dwell on things.
You just drive forward with relentless positivity. And that's something
I find very inspiring. Thank you, you're a friendship.
Speaker 3 (26:44):
Yet Mommy, I appreciate that you.
Speaker 2 (26:46):
Are a here we go, you know where to get
a good slice of pizza, and that is really very
I will say this about you.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
This is what I will say about you too.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
I will say that you make you have what I
call the Jeter effect, and it was something I saw
in real life that I couldn't believe. It's like when
you talk, when you're talking to someone, you make them
feel like they're the most special and only person in
the room.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
Right.
Speaker 2 (27:10):
Think you have a great you have a superpower that
way where you make people feel and you see that
when you especially that's just why you're such a successful
when it comes to crowd work and whatnot and you
and just even speaking within two people like you make
them feel like you care about what they're saying and
like sure you want to get to know them, and
even if it is an act, which it's not.
Speaker 3 (27:29):
You do it better than anybody ever has. Like I
feel like, thank you.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
I think you're just really like to get to know Pia,
and you really do take the time to like you're thoughtful.
I would say that's probably the best word ever like
you buy your gifts for no reason, like you do
things like that, Like you're.
Speaker 3 (27:41):
A thoughtful person. I think that's why I thank you.
Speaker 2 (27:43):
But that's what's most inspiring about you is I've had
I've tried to think about that as well, and taking
the time and putting stock in friendships the way that
I feel like you do, because you know a lot
of people too, but you don't consider a lot of
people friends true, you know, like you've been around a minute,
Like I would go to around town with you, like
down to the cellar and not here in New York
and just seeing like when you walk in the room,
(28:04):
everyone knows you and you know everybody, but you could
tell like there is people that you want to spend
time with and talk to.
Speaker 1 (28:10):
Sure. Yeah, So I think that's a great thing about
the comic clubs too, is that you're waiting to go
up right, so you're kind of forced to talk to
with everybody. But I mean it's just like I don't know,
there is a nice fraternal bond that you develop after
like so many years of just doing this and running
and everybody. It's I don't know, even going out last night,
I like I enjoy catching up with, you know, and
(28:33):
then there's all these new comics I haven't met or whatever.
But but you know what's funny is being friends with
Vince Vaughan for years. I'm always the other guy, right
when you're with Vince. When I'm by myself, I'm a comic, right.
But when you're with Vince, you're the other guy, and
you're constantly being, oh, can you take this for me,
can you take this picture for me? Whatever? And so
every time I'm somewhere and I'm talking to somebody, I
(28:56):
see the other guy, and so I try to give
credence to the other guys well or like I remember
one time we were hanging out with Jason Sideikis and
his friend and I and I was with Vince, and
I was like, Oh, he's Jason's other guy. So we
were just bullshitting about that. But I just being that
other person. Like That's why that picture Justin always makes
(29:18):
me have he's your other guy, you know. And there
was a girl that literally climbed over Justin at dinner
to take a picture. I think it's bananas, but I
always have a lot of empathy for the other guy
or the other girl too. Yeah, the other person the
other person. Yeah. And one of my favorite things to
do this This is something I used to do when
(29:38):
I was when i'd go out all the time, is
I would go out and there's always like after a show,
you'd go to the bar or the club whatever, and
there was always and my friends were like, why the
fuck are you doing this? And there was like the
table of girls, every guy's going to buy a drink for,
right And what I said is, look, we're just getting
our night started, so let's have a little fucking fun.
(29:59):
So I go over to the table of girls that
nobody's buying a drink for. I bet, girls, I'm buying
you fucking drink. Let's go. We're going to the bar
right now. We're all doing a shot together. And every
time I did it, I was never let down because
the intention wasn't hook up obviously with any of them,
but it was we're going to have an absolute blast night.
I was always like, trust me, that's the most fun
(30:19):
table in this room, the table of fun, right, the
table of fun, and that's where you start your night
off and have fun and then you you know, I
don't know. For me, it was always like, that's that's
where I go. It's the way to go. Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 3 (30:30):
I like that.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Okay, here we go, this is coming us from Stone.
Speaker 3 (30:33):
You got some work here, great name.
Speaker 1 (30:35):
Okay, ooopsies, okay, this going us from Stone. Hytoogle moms,
my name is Stone. You might not remember, but I
told you I was going to a jiu jitsu tournament
and I want to let you know I won first
when six and oh your advice really helped my nerves.
Just want to say, thanks, We're champions. We are champions. Oh,
(31:00):
you have to do it.
Speaker 3 (31:01):
I can't.
Speaker 1 (31:03):
You worry about my edded points? Oh my god, isn't
that a musical? Well, in this day and age, it
could be considered eracis the best joke.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
In your special, the best joke in your special. And
if you haven't seen it, make sure you will, make
sure you check it out. So the last late night
Steve Burns on Amazon Prime, Uh, you gave.
Speaker 1 (31:24):
Words of wisdom. Though you're you're you're the jiu jitsu whisper,
I am the jus was. Do you remember this conversation.
Speaker 2 (31:30):
I remember him saying that he was nervous what he
had to do, and we told him that he trained
from his whole life don't get stuck in the moment.
Speaker 1 (31:35):
Think about everything you've done to get there, and you'll
be fine. Six and oh in its tournament, he took
home first place, and he's got to thank you. There's
so many people to thank. I gotta thank mom, I
gotta take my daddy. I got to thank my brother's sister.
But guys, I gotta take anybody else that knows jiu
jitsu or the spirit of a line. It's too cool
buys more more joke out on the sea burn he
(31:55):
was there with joke outill, Thank you are you? Everything
is for Joe.
Speaker 3 (31:59):
I went six and oh today.
Speaker 1 (32:02):
I just want to tell her. There's a podcast out there.
Speaker 3 (32:07):
Changed my jujitsu career. It's called too Cool Up.
Speaker 1 (32:13):
It took sporting advice from a man who's got the
body of a melting candle. The names choke Out, Dust Joe,
and one guy that's half an as you did. That's
for you, Stevie.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
He came up and took the trophy immediately. Thank you right,
thank you Stone Wow.
Speaker 1 (32:33):
You were a big part of that. Well, you know
what we inspire, it's what we do here to You
went to a Rams game, La Rams. You were undefeated
there as well as well, and on the Jumbo Tron,
and you made it on ESPN quests. That's right. I
remember watching the game. I was like, get the fuck
out of here.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
The guy came over, He's like, don't pay attention to us.
So me and Jiggy pretend to have a fake conversation,
and he was all really perfect, like if you notice one,
if you know, because.
Speaker 1 (32:56):
You're talking to Jiggy, you can be more Jiggy than Yes.
I go to jigg and I'm like, oh what we
would just using my hands a lot. Yeah, And then I.
Speaker 3 (33:04):
And the guy was like, that's enough.
Speaker 1 (33:06):
But you guys, you guys won the game. We did
that game.
Speaker 3 (33:08):
That was a big comeback game too for a boy
justin Herbert.
Speaker 1 (33:11):
Yeah, I want it.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
That's like it.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
Next year though, they're gonna go all the way. He's
gonna wear the ring and win the Stanley Cup.
Speaker 1 (33:19):
Next question, Next question sports sports. This is coming ups
from Grace. Hey, Mommy's how do you deal with anger?
I think that changes as you get older? Yeah, definitely older.
Speaker 3 (33:35):
When I was younger, you were a short fused guy,
you know.
Speaker 1 (33:38):
You when I was younger, Yeah for sure, Yeah, for sure,
and then you get older, you're just like you're too
tired to be angry almost, but also you have more
to lose.
Speaker 2 (33:47):
Yeah, that you talked about their road road rage thing
once where kids were in the car.
Speaker 1 (33:51):
Sure that was that was your way of saying, don't
tell that fucking story again.
Speaker 2 (33:57):
Like remember when you told that story three times already.
Speaker 1 (34:00):
So I met this kid in Connecticut. He showed up himself.
Speaker 2 (34:02):
Good job is there, I did. I don't think I
ever really had a short fuse. I only remember one time,
one time I got and I had.
Speaker 1 (34:13):
This one time Murray.
Speaker 2 (34:15):
I didn't really have short fuses. But I wouldn't even
say I deal with my anger. I kind of just
like I try to let it. People say that we
like you, let'stuff roll.
Speaker 3 (34:24):
Off your back.
Speaker 2 (34:25):
Yeah, I think that's a way of not really addressing
what's bothering you.
Speaker 1 (34:28):
Though sometimes I I've just come to learn that anger
will subside. Anger is temporary, And so I've gotten to
a point where I'm like, Okay, you're fucking angry, get
it out. Let's take a walk. And I'll go take
a walk. I'll get some fresh air, I'll listen to
some music, and i'll just mule through what it is.
And again to quote, you take stock of what it is.
But it's just temporary and solvable for sure. Yeah yeah, right, yeah,
(34:53):
So I it's a man made problem, so there's a
man made solution. A look at that, great John F. Kennedy.
John F.
Speaker 2 (35:00):
Kennedy said, yeah, yeah, I was saying, because smart you should. No,
don't take that, because somebody's gonna write in angrily. It's
gonna be writing the comments.
Speaker 3 (35:06):
You're no JF guy.
Speaker 2 (35:10):
I've never really, I've never really had felt like I've
got let anger get the best of me.
Speaker 3 (35:16):
I only once in college.
Speaker 2 (35:17):
I remember that I was I was angry that a
guy was dancing with a girl that I liked at
the club and I stepped up. He had thrown a
look at me, and I had stepped up and said
what And I said what? I said I And I
said you know, I said, what.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
Are you doing? You know?
Speaker 3 (35:31):
I said, you know that you know that I like
her and blah blah, and the kid was like, oh.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
Yea, all right, all right, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. And
I was like, but the kid was thinking of me,
And I was like, why is this kid saying? And
I turned around and Mungo was behind me, my one
of my frat brothers.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
Well, and Mungo doesn't sound small he was.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
He was like literally like like a rottwhiler on the chain,
like he was like waiting to go, waiting for me
to say.
Speaker 3 (35:49):
And I turn around. I instantly switched.
Speaker 1 (35:50):
I was like, oh no, no, no, no, welcome, calm down
God and I turned into like the pasifist stopped it all. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (35:56):
I remember what time there was a huge fight at
a bar and it's spilled out onto the streets and
now all my friends were fighting, and this one guy
comes up to me.
Speaker 3 (36:05):
And he comes up to me and he guess right,
he has his hands up and I go, I.
Speaker 2 (36:08):
Go uhhing, I said, no, thank you, he's just punch
somebody else.
Speaker 1 (36:15):
Oh that's great. One of my favorite videos. You ever
see that video of a fight breaking out and there's
just this Chinese kid and he's eating a bowl of
the noodles and the fight breaks out. He doesn't even
he doesn't even look. He just goes like this and
walks out of frame and keeps eating his noodles. I
was like, yeah, that's anybody in their forties, I think
in your twenties, you're like, hey, guys, what's going on.
You want to be peacemaker and stuff. I think you
(36:35):
get to a point just like fuck oh they'll work
it out. Yeah, yeah, everybody.
Speaker 2 (36:39):
I feel like everybody's getting punched everywhere nowadays too. You
see these videos like they're in McDonald's, they're in Target,
they're in Walmart, they're in a library.
Speaker 1 (36:45):
Like there's no place that's safe. No, no, oh, somebody
told me. I think sometimes they get angry again. When
you're driving, people are constantly constantly doing incredibly rude, really
dangerous shit on. I think driving's got more aggressive, for
sure in the last ten years. I'm blown away at
the times I get cut off. And before I would
(37:08):
kind of speed up or whatever, and now I'm just like,
all right, just go the far right, give it ten seconds,
just chill out. I forget my story. I forget what
oh oh, this is it. So somebody was telling me
that their father, when somebody would tailgate them where they'd
see somebody fly by or whatever. I thought, this is
such a good line. Their father would always would always
(37:28):
kind of pull over to the right and go, yeah,
go get them, and so that kind of pops in
my head. Now when I hear that, I'm like, that's
such a funny line.
Speaker 2 (37:38):
There is there is not There are not many things
in life that are give you a fill of satisfaction
and pry and just just so happy to be alive.
Is when somebody's being an ass on the road and
about a quarter of a mile.
Speaker 1 (37:50):
You see the wreck and the fireball and you're like,
in their dad, Yeah, that makes me smile. Oh I
love Yes. Next question, I was gonna say, pulled over,
but you know it is the best when you're like.
Speaker 3 (38:03):
Again, I'm like, roll down the window. You're like, hey,
was it jerk?
Speaker 1 (38:06):
Was that ass? Here we go. This is coming us
from Austin. Austin, Okay. Question for the podcast. How do
you guys exude so much confidence? I've always feared public
speaking or speaking to new people in general. I always
go through scenarios in my head if I said the
right thing, if the conversation went well, et cetera. Any
advice for building confidence.
Speaker 2 (38:25):
Something I heard early on in my life that stuck
with me was people don't care as much as you think.
Speaker 3 (38:32):
Oh yeah, I think that's a big thing.
Speaker 2 (38:34):
Like you're you're up there all nervous like oh whatever,
like and if you like people are just like, okay,
what do you have to say? Like you put so
much pressure on the audience looking, But think about the
time you're in the audience and you're sitting there, like
watching someone speak, Sure, what are you doing? You're sitting
there and listening like you're not like, oh, I can't
wait the list person messages up or something like that.
Speaker 3 (38:52):
So I think that was a minor thing for me.
Speaker 2 (38:54):
That really was like people just don't really care as
much as you think when you're up there speaking.
Speaker 1 (38:57):
They just someone I want to say, and you especially.
Speaker 2 (39:00):
Public speaking, that's a big fear for people too, though,
like public speeding, they'd rather die.
Speaker 1 (39:04):
Yeah, I thought they were like speak public speaker.
Speaker 3 (39:06):
Yeah, a lot of people.
Speaker 1 (39:07):
I mean we're the real heroes, we are, yeah, I
mean first responders, like the military flyovers is like.
Speaker 3 (39:13):
No, I mean they're not even stopping, they're just flying over.
Speaker 1 (39:17):
I mean we're getting in there.
Speaker 3 (39:18):
We're getting in there, mixing it up with the people.
Speaker 1 (39:19):
Yeah, really doing the hard stuff.
Speaker 3 (39:21):
Chopping it up. I never really did you have a
fear of public speaking.
Speaker 1 (39:26):
I think when you first start, Dana, for sure, yeah,
I mean it took two or three years. But I
always say it's just like imagine platform diving. Right, you're
ten meters, twenty five meters, thirty meters, So the first
one hundred times you do it, yeah, you're gonna be
a little scared. The one hundred and first you're like,
all right, I've done this, Now I can do my
gain or whatever. It is helped the thing, so let's
get used to it. Yeah, but I think it terms
(39:47):
about younger though, like before stand up, like when you
were Yeah, of course you get nervous, but I was
like Stevie rally, I did like little routines and stuff
for five minutes take it through that. I don't I
don't know what I would it's all kind of a blurb,
but I would do.
Speaker 3 (40:03):
Here about Stevie's pep rally routine.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
I would do. I would do like five minutes before
the pep rally and just tell jokes or pull up
my current at the frog doll and do an impression
and stuff. And it's just like there was humili I'm
sure it was humiliated, but but at the time like
it it was doing well. Yeah I got laughs.
Speaker 2 (40:22):
Yeah, so you had a Kermit and you did the
Kermit voice.
Speaker 1 (40:26):
Yeah. Like at pep rallies and stuff, I would do
like dances or just anything for attention and laughs. Yeah, anything,
but it was humiliating. Yeah. I think like in terms
of like building up confidence, I wholehrdly agree with you
about people don't think as much as you do. And
I think if anything, people appreciate effort, whether if you're
a stranger in a situation you Hey, I'm Steve, how
(40:48):
are you just like, hey, thanks for taking the time
to Yeah, of course, who's not gonna who's not gonna
knock that.
Speaker 2 (40:54):
I think talking more in smaller groups also helps more
you're speaking to strangers, because that's all speaking is. Yeah,
it's speaking to strangers and then speaking to a group
of strangers.
Speaker 3 (41:03):
So a way that helps is baby stuff.
Speaker 2 (41:06):
Like you said about the thing is like about diving,
is like talk to people out and about, then talk
to groups out, approach smaller groups out and about, and
before you know it, you'll be fine.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
Yeah, And he's he's walking himself through scenarios of like
saying what if it went well, what if I did this?
What if you just stopped and just did it? You know,
you could sit there and talk yourself out of talking
to a girl that you think is pretty across the bar.
Think about a hundred things you could say or a
hundred reasons why you shouldn't do it. But you just
got to shut out all off and just go and
trust your instincts. You're a good person. I'm sure you are.
(41:36):
Most people are. So he's one of our listeners. Of course,
he's a great mom. He's an honorary cool mom who
deserves some T shirt.
Speaker 3 (41:44):
That's right, merch Yeah, link in the bio next week.
Speaker 1 (41:47):
There we go. Okay, well, we did it. We did
we really did it.
Speaker 2 (41:51):
You know, I think we've we've helped at least two
to seven people and across the board.
Speaker 1 (41:57):
Yeah, and we've helped rectify our friendship. As you came
in hot hot, I texted one, two, three, four and
forgot you got a phone call. That's right from this guy.
Speaker 2 (42:08):
Okay, Well, rest on your laurels until the next time
you don't text me back.
Speaker 3 (42:12):
Okay, you got it.
Speaker 1 (42:13):
We'll give you this one. We'll give you that. So
har No, we did it. Thank everybody for listening too.
Speaker 3 (42:17):
Cools Moms, buye.
Speaker 1 (42:19):
T shirt Bye T shirt. Yeah, that's non existent. These
two cool mommies love you, so show us some love.
Speaker 2 (42:25):
Please rate us, review us, follow us on all social media,
and subscribe to our YouTube
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